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1
00:00:08,883 --> 00:00:10,360
Oh, come on, sir.
2
00:00:11,469 --> 00:00:13,822
- Where's my slice?
- Sorry, Cyrus. All out.
3
00:00:43,918 --> 00:00:45,520
Oh, my God.
4
00:00:48,089 --> 00:00:49,607
Stay away from me.
5
00:00:51,259 --> 00:00:52,402
Saint Mary's?
6
00:00:53,762 --> 00:00:55,446
Is that where you're coming from?
7
00:00:56,431 --> 00:00:59,450
- What's happening outside?
- It's a good hospital.
8
00:01:03,354 --> 00:01:05,748
You probably went under
when most people did.
9
00:01:06,858 --> 00:01:08,710
Shit started to go wild.
10
00:01:09,652 --> 00:01:13,595
Computers crashed,
then the aliens showed up.
11
00:01:13,615 --> 00:01:15,055
- Wh-- What?
- Yeah.
12
00:01:15,075 --> 00:01:16,968
The whole world's gone to shit.
13
00:01:17,660 --> 00:01:19,726
Aliens out there...
14
00:01:19,746 --> 00:01:21,639
...forcing people.
15
00:01:23,291 --> 00:01:24,934
Having their way with them.
16
00:01:26,169 --> 00:01:27,478
Sexually.
17
00:01:28,213 --> 00:01:29,355
Sexually?
18
00:01:30,924 --> 00:01:32,233
I don't understand.
19
00:01:33,426 --> 00:01:34,569
What's your name?
20
00:01:35,428 --> 00:01:37,780
- I'm... I'm Evan.
- Evan.
21
00:01:39,057 --> 00:01:40,158
That's a nice name.
22
00:01:40,809 --> 00:01:42,410
I'm Roger. Come on.
23
00:01:43,061 --> 00:01:44,412
I got you.
24
00:01:49,359 --> 00:01:50,668
You'll be all right.
25
00:01:56,324 --> 00:01:58,051
I gotta get out of here, man.
26
00:01:59,077 --> 00:02:00,850
You're lucky you found this place.
27
00:02:00,870 --> 00:02:02,727
We're safe in here.
28
00:02:02,747 --> 00:02:04,432
How long have you been here?
29
00:02:06,876 --> 00:02:08,436
A long time.
30
00:02:09,379 --> 00:02:10,688
You haven't tried to leave?
31
00:02:13,925 --> 00:02:16,611
- There's only one way to get out of here.
- What?
32
00:02:17,637 --> 00:02:18,988
What is it?
33
00:02:20,223 --> 00:02:21,616
You're not gonna like it.
34
00:02:22,809 --> 00:02:25,625
I don't care if I don't like it, man.
35
00:02:25,645 --> 00:02:27,163
Just tell me.
36
00:02:30,024 --> 00:02:32,627
I saw some people do it
when I first got here.
37
00:02:34,362 --> 00:02:35,922
It was horrible.
38
00:02:36,656 --> 00:02:38,299
You saw it and it worked?
39
00:02:39,159 --> 00:02:40,802
Why haven't you tried?
40
00:02:42,287 --> 00:02:43,763
You need two people.
41
00:02:44,455 --> 00:02:46,604
They both have to be committed.
42
00:02:46,624 --> 00:02:48,106
That's good.
43
00:02:48,126 --> 00:02:49,274
All right.
44
00:02:49,294 --> 00:02:52,188
We're two people, and we're committed.
45
00:02:53,339 --> 00:02:54,983
Just tell me what it is.
46
00:02:56,759 --> 00:02:57,860
Okay.
47
00:02:58,553 --> 00:03:00,655
You see that toilet over there?
48
00:03:02,891 --> 00:03:03,992
Yeah.
49
00:03:04,434 --> 00:03:06,207
I'm gonna sit on that toilet.
50
00:03:06,227 --> 00:03:08,037
And when I do,
51
00:03:08,813 --> 00:03:11,379
there will be a gap between my legs.
52
00:03:11,399 --> 00:03:14,711
You're gonna come over there
and you're gonna sit in that gap.
53
00:03:15,612 --> 00:03:18,761
And listen, this is where it gets odd.
54
00:03:18,781 --> 00:03:21,759
We both have to shit at the same time.
55
00:03:22,952 --> 00:03:24,679
And if we can do that,
56
00:03:25,246 --> 00:03:26,347
a portal
57
00:03:27,707 --> 00:03:29,892
will open on that wall
58
00:03:30,376 --> 00:03:32,228
and we can leave this madness.
59
00:03:33,546 --> 00:03:35,653
How could you fuck with me like that, man?
60
00:03:35,673 --> 00:03:37,780
I'm not fucking with you.
61
00:03:37,800 --> 00:03:40,945
Sit on a toilet with you
and shit at the same time?
62
00:03:41,930 --> 00:03:43,489
- It works.
- Yeah.
63
00:03:44,224 --> 00:03:46,289
Yeah, you're a fucking lunatic, man.
64
00:03:46,309 --> 00:03:48,036
I'm fucking out of here.
65
00:03:50,730 --> 00:03:52,123
I wouldn't do that.
66
00:03:59,280 --> 00:04:02,258
I just went in to have
my appendix removed.
67
00:04:05,912 --> 00:04:07,388
You see this wall?
68
00:04:08,331 --> 00:04:11,559
This is the portal that opens some...
69
00:04:12,502 --> 00:04:16,481
interdimensional alien something. I...
70
00:04:17,924 --> 00:04:19,150
I've seen it.
71
00:04:21,177 --> 00:04:22,403
It works.
72
00:04:26,140 --> 00:04:27,992
This is insane, man.
73
00:04:28,434 --> 00:04:30,875
So I'm just gonna sit back
74
00:04:30,895 --> 00:04:33,831
so the gap is big enough for you there.
75
00:04:35,525 --> 00:04:37,257
And then we're gonna shit together?
76
00:04:37,277 --> 00:04:39,045
Take a look around, man.
77
00:04:39,737 --> 00:04:44,300
You fell asleep in the hospital
and woke up in a goddamn alien apocalypse.
78
00:04:45,034 --> 00:04:48,596
Machines fighting aliens,
aliens fucking humans.
79
00:04:49,622 --> 00:04:52,100
Is this really the craziest thing
happening these days?
80
00:04:53,918 --> 00:04:56,734
- They're fucking humans?
- Uh...
81
00:04:56,754 --> 00:04:58,653
Maybe you'd be a little more comfortable
82
00:04:58,673 --> 00:05:01,818
if you just kind of
faced out the other way.
83
00:05:02,385 --> 00:05:03,366
Turn around.
84
00:05:03,386 --> 00:05:05,530
- Yeah.
- Yeah, okay.
85
00:05:06,139 --> 00:05:07,240
Yeah.
86
00:05:08,266 --> 00:05:10,039
All right.
87
00:05:10,059 --> 00:05:11,953
Now we just need to focus.
88
00:05:12,937 --> 00:05:14,460
Here we go, Roger.
89
00:05:14,480 --> 00:05:15,873
Here we go.
90
00:05:23,906 --> 00:05:26,556
I shit.
91
00:05:26,576 --> 00:05:30,096
I did it, but, uh, nothing's happening.
92
00:05:32,081 --> 00:05:33,307
Evan, I...
93
00:05:34,375 --> 00:05:35,726
I didn't go.
94
00:05:36,419 --> 00:05:39,027
What? You... You didn't? But...
95
00:05:39,047 --> 00:05:40,523
I guess I wasn't ready.
96
00:05:41,382 --> 00:05:43,067
Do you maybe have another one in you?
97
00:05:43,551 --> 00:05:46,492
Another one? I don't know, man.
98
00:05:46,512 --> 00:05:48,911
Hold on.
99
00:05:48,931 --> 00:05:50,788
- Oh, maybe a little one.
- Ah.
100
00:05:50,808 --> 00:05:53,041
- That's enough.
- Okay.
101
00:05:53,061 --> 00:05:55,079
All right. Here it goes. You ready?
102
00:05:55,938 --> 00:05:57,665
- You bet.
- Yeah, okay.
103
00:05:58,232 --> 00:06:02,044
Okay, here it goes. Here it...
104
00:06:09,160 --> 00:06:10,344
I did it.
105
00:06:10,787 --> 00:06:11,893
I shit!
106
00:06:11,913 --> 00:06:13,019
Oh, my God!
107
00:06:13,039 --> 00:06:15,641
Did you shit too?
108
00:06:17,126 --> 00:06:18,561
You know what?
109
00:06:19,504 --> 00:06:20,521
I didn't.
110
00:06:22,340 --> 00:06:23,900
You didn't go?
111
00:06:24,550 --> 00:06:28,029
Then why did I just shit
between your legs?
112
00:06:30,223 --> 00:06:32,325
So I can come, baby.
113
00:06:52,203 --> 00:06:53,679
What do you think?
114
00:06:54,205 --> 00:06:55,436
I love it.
115
00:06:55,456 --> 00:06:57,605
All right! Nice!
116
00:06:57,625 --> 00:06:58,815
- We'll take it.
- Great.
117
00:06:58,835 --> 00:06:59,899
- He's a good kid.
- Yeah.
118
00:06:59,919 --> 00:07:01,317
How'd you trick him?
119
00:07:01,337 --> 00:07:03,069
I made him shit.
120
00:07:03,089 --> 00:07:04,153
You did?
121
00:07:04,173 --> 00:07:05,655
- That's very clever.
- Is it?
122
00:07:05,675 --> 00:07:07,485
Yeah. That is very clever.
123
00:07:07,969 --> 00:07:09,534
Do you want the neuron adapter?
124
00:07:09,554 --> 00:07:11,369
It shocks you when the alien comes.
125
00:07:11,389 --> 00:07:13,037
Buddy, what do you think?
126
00:07:13,057 --> 00:07:14,288
- Yeah!
- Yeah, let's go for it.
127
00:07:14,308 --> 00:07:15,415
All right.
128
00:07:15,435 --> 00:07:18,371
Some people say it hurts,
but I think it adds to the experience.
129
00:07:23,151 --> 00:07:24,799
Success is tough.
130
00:07:24,819 --> 00:07:26,342
Some people define success
131
00:07:26,362 --> 00:07:29,053
as spending quality time
with the people they love.
132
00:07:29,073 --> 00:07:32,552
I think we can all agree
that those people are losers.
133
00:07:33,536 --> 00:07:36,352
Success means different things
to different people.
134
00:07:36,372 --> 00:07:38,563
To this person, it's gaining followers.
135
00:07:38,583 --> 00:07:42,358
To this guy, success means spreading
conspiracy theories on the Internet.
136
00:07:42,378 --> 00:07:44,735
I'm a 20-year-old African American woman,
137
00:07:44,755 --> 00:07:47,697
and the measles vaccine
caused my hair to fall out.
138
00:07:47,717 --> 00:07:50,575
And to this man,
it means going to the bathroom
139
00:07:50,595 --> 00:07:52,577
without filling up the entire toilet
140
00:07:52,597 --> 00:07:53,656
with blood.
141
00:07:54,265 --> 00:07:55,533
Not today.
142
00:07:56,767 --> 00:07:59,161
What does success mean to you?
143
00:08:04,567 --> 00:08:08,509
He's one of the most
successful actors to grace the screen.
144
00:08:08,529 --> 00:08:12,638
He's punched, he's kicked,
he's flipped countless bad guys.
145
00:08:12,658 --> 00:08:15,595
Didn't your mother teach you
not to stay out after dark?
146
00:08:17,497 --> 00:08:20,605
Now we are behind the scenes
on the super-secret set
147
00:08:20,625 --> 00:08:24,192
of the new high-octane thriller
Maximum Kickage.
148
00:08:24,212 --> 00:08:27,320
Starring the man, the myth,
the legend himself,
149
00:08:27,340 --> 00:08:29,071
Steven Seagal.
150
00:08:29,091 --> 00:08:31,360
Steven, you look great.
151
00:08:31,844 --> 00:08:33,571
Yeah.
152
00:08:34,639 --> 00:08:37,497
In the film, you play Drake Kicking,
153
00:08:37,517 --> 00:08:42,210
an American sent to Russia
to expose corrupt FBI agents
154
00:08:42,230 --> 00:08:44,921
who are running
a fentanyl and kiddie porn ring.
155
00:08:44,941 --> 00:08:47,757
Also, I dismantle nuclear bombs.
156
00:08:47,777 --> 00:08:49,383
Also, I'm a doctor.
157
00:08:49,403 --> 00:08:51,339
Also, I make love to many beautiful women.
158
00:08:52,156 --> 00:08:53,507
Sort of like you.
159
00:08:54,450 --> 00:08:55,468
Yeah.
160
00:08:56,160 --> 00:08:58,392
Like any great Steven Seagal movie,
161
00:08:58,412 --> 00:09:01,849
the audience can expect
heart-pounding fight scenes.
162
00:09:03,834 --> 00:09:06,067
I do karate on a helicopter.
163
00:09:06,087 --> 00:09:08,778
I do kung-fu on a speeding motorcycle.
164
00:09:08,798 --> 00:09:10,112
I do all my own shit.
165
00:09:10,132 --> 00:09:11,697
Not like that pussy, Tom Cruise.
166
00:09:11,717 --> 00:09:13,027
Open up.
167
00:09:14,136 --> 00:09:15,034
That was your fault.
168
00:09:15,054 --> 00:09:17,036
Isn't it dangerous
to do stunts practically?
169
00:09:17,056 --> 00:09:18,704
- If you're a bitch.
- Right.
170
00:09:18,724 --> 00:09:20,201
Van Damme is a bitch.
171
00:09:20,977 --> 00:09:21,958
Wesley Snipes is a bitch.
172
00:09:21,978 --> 00:09:23,334
Daniel Craig's a bitch.
173
00:09:23,354 --> 00:09:25,169
- So how do you--
- Jason Statham's a bitch.
174
00:09:25,189 --> 00:09:26,837
- Oh.
- Tom Cruise. Did I say him?
175
00:09:26,857 --> 00:09:28,834
- You did.
- He's a double bitch.
176
00:09:30,570 --> 00:09:32,426
What's it like shooting a movie in Russia?
177
00:09:32,446 --> 00:09:33,594
The greatest. The greatest.
178
00:09:33,614 --> 00:09:35,638
My good friend Vladimir Putin
179
00:09:35,658 --> 00:09:37,682
was very excited.
180
00:09:37,702 --> 00:09:39,970
This has been a dream come true.
181
00:09:40,413 --> 00:09:42,765
- Y'all supposed to be FBI?
- Mm-hmm.
182
00:09:43,374 --> 00:09:45,851
You're fittin' to be FB bye-bye.
183
00:09:51,424 --> 00:09:54,949
Hi. I'm James Gonzalez,
and I play FBI Villain One. Yeah.
184
00:09:54,969 --> 00:09:56,821
- You'll pay for this.
- Yeah.
185
00:09:58,055 --> 00:10:00,705
- Uh, cut.
- What the fuck, Steven?
186
00:10:00,725 --> 00:10:03,457
I'm Ericka.
I play the Head of Special Forces,
187
00:10:03,477 --> 00:10:08,087
and working with Steven
has been an incredible experience.
188
00:10:08,107 --> 00:10:10,876
Um, I can't speak highly--
189
00:10:21,329 --> 00:10:22,430
Um...
190
00:10:25,750 --> 00:10:27,143
Oh, uh...
191
00:10:31,464 --> 00:10:33,482
Um...
192
00:10:34,634 --> 00:10:36,616
Sugar, this ain't nothing but a nuke.
193
00:10:36,636 --> 00:10:37,950
Cut the black wire.
194
00:10:37,970 --> 00:10:40,995
From what I hear,
you don't always stick to the script.
195
00:10:41,015 --> 00:10:43,080
Well, I am the king of improv.
196
00:10:43,100 --> 00:10:47,293
In my 30 years on Special Forces,
I've never seen anyone as brave as you.
197
00:10:47,313 --> 00:10:50,254
- Shut up and kiss me.
- What? Um...
198
00:10:50,274 --> 00:10:51,881
Um...
199
00:10:51,901 --> 00:10:53,627
I've gotta... The bomb's ticking out.
200
00:10:54,779 --> 00:10:55,760
Um, no.
201
00:10:55,780 --> 00:10:57,339
What are we doing here?
202
00:10:57,740 --> 00:11:02,433
In my 30 years on Special Forces,
I've never seen anyone as brave as you.
203
00:11:02,453 --> 00:11:03,721
Shut up and kiss me.
204
00:11:13,339 --> 00:11:15,696
Like I said, I am the king of improv.
205
00:11:15,716 --> 00:11:18,402
You do have a way with words.
206
00:11:21,806 --> 00:11:24,163
- Fuck, fuck, fuck...
- Do we need to cut?
207
00:11:24,183 --> 00:11:26,582
No, baby. These are my investors.
208
00:11:26,602 --> 00:11:29,001
What's up?
209
00:11:29,021 --> 00:11:30,956
Hey, what a surprise.
210
00:11:34,026 --> 00:11:36,509
Nyet? All right.
Well, this is gonna be a classic.
211
00:11:36,529 --> 00:11:37,843
It's got fights.
212
00:11:37,863 --> 00:11:38,928
Hardcore sex...
213
00:11:38,948 --> 00:11:41,555
We've seen the dailies,
this is a garbage movie.
214
00:11:41,575 --> 00:11:43,641
We only got one more scene. That's it.
215
00:11:43,661 --> 00:11:44,809
You're gonna love it.
216
00:11:44,829 --> 00:11:47,019
You idiot, you owe us $80 million.
217
00:11:47,039 --> 00:11:48,854
Oleg, remove his testicles.
218
00:11:48,874 --> 00:11:51,023
Hey, hey, no, listen, y'all.
219
00:11:51,043 --> 00:11:53,484
Just give old Stevie one more shot.
220
00:11:53,504 --> 00:11:55,986
It's going to be a beautiful scene.
Come watch.
221
00:11:56,006 --> 00:11:57,650
Let me do my magic.
222
00:11:58,300 --> 00:11:59,740
Let me keep my testicles.
223
00:11:59,760 --> 00:12:01,909
Fine, let's see this scene.
224
00:12:01,929 --> 00:12:03,739
Spasibo.
225
00:12:06,934 --> 00:12:07,998
Roll, mark.
226
00:12:08,018 --> 00:12:10,626
Here we go. Ready and action!
227
00:12:10,646 --> 00:12:13,666
America says it's tax time.
228
00:12:15,484 --> 00:12:16,507
Ah!
229
00:12:16,527 --> 00:12:19,802
You know, I could kill you
very easily right now.
230
00:12:19,822 --> 00:12:23,217
But I know you'll be
waiting for me in hell.
231
00:12:26,912 --> 00:12:28,931
Fuck it.
232
00:12:32,710 --> 00:12:34,108
I'm dyin'.
233
00:12:34,128 --> 00:12:37,106
I'm bleeding and I'm dying.
Look at me die, everybody.
234
00:12:39,508 --> 00:12:40,609
Cut.
235
00:12:41,302 --> 00:12:44,243
Camera down! I said camera down!
236
00:12:44,263 --> 00:12:46,746
That was the best acting
I've ever seen me do.
237
00:12:46,766 --> 00:12:48,914
We have enough to finish the film.
238
00:12:48,934 --> 00:12:51,787
Wait. It ain't got to be like this. Wait!
239
00:12:54,273 --> 00:12:55,791
PLEASE STAND BY
240
00:12:56,275 --> 00:13:02,531
Maximum Kickage coming to hotel rooms
and Russian annexed territories this fall.
241
00:13:04,408 --> 00:13:06,302
Yeah. I just want to go home, man.
242
00:13:11,123 --> 00:13:12,396
Hey, hen hounds,
243
00:13:12,416 --> 00:13:14,857
it's your favorite country
global superstar, Rex Henley.
244
00:13:14,877 --> 00:13:17,109
I've been seeing the comments
y'all have been leaving
245
00:13:17,129 --> 00:13:21,739
on my social media platforms
and I've been hearing the jokes on TV.
246
00:13:21,759 --> 00:13:24,283
Country singer, Rex Henley,
has a new single.
247
00:13:24,303 --> 00:13:26,494
It's called, and I'm not making this up,
248
00:13:26,514 --> 00:13:28,287
Rich Guy Advice.
249
00:13:28,307 --> 00:13:31,081
That's the actual the title of the album.
250
00:13:31,101 --> 00:13:33,334
Rex Henley is a fucking weirdo.
251
00:13:33,354 --> 00:13:36,128
This is the guy who used
to write heartfelt American songs
252
00:13:36,148 --> 00:13:37,630
about his '65 Chevy.
253
00:13:37,650 --> 00:13:39,548
Now he's doing this?
254
00:13:39,568 --> 00:13:42,379
I get it. Maybe I got too many fancy cars.
255
00:13:43,447 --> 00:13:44,762
Planes and...
256
00:13:44,782 --> 00:13:46,597
drink too many iced macchiatos.
257
00:13:46,617 --> 00:13:48,766
Rex, here's some rich-guy advice for you.
258
00:13:48,786 --> 00:13:50,976
Stop making music, please.
259
00:13:50,996 --> 00:13:53,938
I'mma make a promise to y'all.
260
00:13:53,958 --> 00:13:57,394
The next time you hear a Rex Henley song,
261
00:13:58,128 --> 00:13:59,730
you're gonna get touched
262
00:14:00,548 --> 00:14:02,858
in a way you've never been touched before.
263
00:14:04,134 --> 00:14:05,319
And I like that.
264
00:14:07,096 --> 00:14:08,781
I really like that.
265
00:14:18,357 --> 00:14:20,417
Run faster. Where are you?
266
00:14:20,943 --> 00:14:23,003
Hey, come here! Hurry up!
267
00:14:23,779 --> 00:14:25,678
Hey! What are you doing?
268
00:14:25,698 --> 00:14:29,682
No, sir, oh, please, sir.
I was just trying to tie my shoe.
269
00:14:29,702 --> 00:14:31,095
You bastard!
270
00:14:32,037 --> 00:14:34,223
It's here, hurry up!
271
00:14:44,633 --> 00:14:46,735
Move, quick!
272
00:14:47,261 --> 00:14:49,321
Move, quickly!
273
00:14:51,265 --> 00:14:53,497
Oh, my God. Oh. Please don't hurt me.
274
00:14:53,517 --> 00:14:55,452
No one's gonna hurt you.
275
00:14:56,854 --> 00:14:58,252
Where am I?
276
00:14:58,272 --> 00:15:02,256
The last thing I remember
was being at a concert, I think?
277
00:15:02,276 --> 00:15:04,586
Yeah, we were all at a fucking concert.
278
00:15:09,658 --> 00:15:11,051
Here we go.
279
00:15:18,918 --> 00:15:20,853
Don't even think about runnin'.
280
00:15:21,545 --> 00:15:24,732
Big trucks, cold beer
281
00:15:25,507 --> 00:15:28,866
Stars and stripes
Still fly around here
282
00:15:28,886 --> 00:15:31,321
He's coming.
283
00:15:32,681 --> 00:15:34,658
He's coming.
284
00:15:35,517 --> 00:15:37,953
What the fuck?
285
00:15:38,687 --> 00:15:42,124
Country music and kickin' ass, yeah!
286
00:15:58,332 --> 00:16:00,309
Just keep clapping.
287
00:16:18,477 --> 00:16:19,411
All right!
288
00:16:19,895 --> 00:16:21,377
Is that Rex Henley?
289
00:16:21,397 --> 00:16:25,547
Whoo! All right, you guys ready
for an unplugged sesh?
290
00:16:25,567 --> 00:16:27,508
Yeah.
291
00:16:27,528 --> 00:16:29,551
Hey-hey, that's the good stuff, man.
292
00:16:29,571 --> 00:16:31,136
God damn, I miss those cheers.
293
00:16:31,156 --> 00:16:33,222
Feels good when they clap.
294
00:16:33,242 --> 00:16:35,302
All right. Whoo!
295
00:16:36,370 --> 00:16:38,472
Now, where my hen hounds at?
296
00:16:41,125 --> 00:16:43,524
You guys ready to get to it?
You lazy bums.
297
00:16:43,544 --> 00:16:44,775
What is happening?
298
00:16:44,795 --> 00:16:47,236
- Enough resting.
- He's kidnapped a bunch of his fans.
299
00:16:47,256 --> 00:16:49,571
- We're here to work.
- He's mining us for material.
300
00:16:49,591 --> 00:16:51,407
He's trying to write a new album.
301
00:16:51,427 --> 00:16:53,695
So think of this as a conversation.
302
00:16:54,304 --> 00:16:56,578
We are wiping out the walls
between you and me
303
00:16:56,598 --> 00:17:00,124
in an effort to get to the truth.
304
00:17:00,144 --> 00:17:01,542
That's where I want to go.
305
00:17:01,562 --> 00:17:04,461
I want to get to the real stuff.
Slick stuff, raw stuff.
306
00:17:04,481 --> 00:17:07,923
He even built this fake town
to try to relate to normal folk.
307
00:17:07,943 --> 00:17:10,509
The only way you do that
is by being honest.
308
00:17:10,529 --> 00:17:12,136
I'm in pursuit of it.
309
00:17:12,156 --> 00:17:15,180
He calls us the poors.
I'm a brain surgeon.
310
00:17:15,200 --> 00:17:18,637
Now, who's ready
to share a problem they got?
311
00:17:19,246 --> 00:17:21,687
You, hat, tell me one of your problems.
312
00:17:21,707 --> 00:17:23,100
Uh...
313
00:17:23,834 --> 00:17:24,977
My feet hurt.
314
00:17:26,336 --> 00:17:27,985
My feet hurt.
315
00:17:28,005 --> 00:17:29,194
You hear this shit?
316
00:17:29,214 --> 00:17:32,156
You think I wanna write a song
about a busted fucking flip-flop?
317
00:17:32,176 --> 00:17:35,325
This ain't Margaritaville, muchacho.
I want some real shit.
318
00:17:35,345 --> 00:17:38,078
Why don't you go get your toes done?
Anybody else?
319
00:17:38,098 --> 00:17:39,116
You.
320
00:17:39,600 --> 00:17:42,327
My mother died in 9/11.
321
00:17:42,853 --> 00:17:45,205
Ooh! I like that.
322
00:17:46,065 --> 00:17:48,213
Byung Sung, where are your manners?
323
00:17:48,233 --> 00:17:50,294
Give this starving bitch a shrimp.
324
00:17:52,112 --> 00:17:53,547
This hag.
325
00:17:53,989 --> 00:17:56,341
Here's a bunch. Eat it, bitch!
326
00:18:04,416 --> 00:18:07,024
On a cold September morning
327
00:18:07,044 --> 00:18:10,944
Mama got up to go to work
328
00:18:10,964 --> 00:18:14,610
Yeah, I can work with that.
I like that. Very nice.
329
00:18:22,726 --> 00:18:26,079
You know, I like 9/11
as much as the next guy.
330
00:18:26,688 --> 00:18:29,505
But my good buddy, Byung Sung, here
331
00:18:29,525 --> 00:18:32,007
just reminded me that a few months ago,
332
00:18:32,027 --> 00:18:35,297
you said your mama died in a hurricane.
333
00:18:36,115 --> 00:18:41,391
Now, I do not quite recall
what sent those towers crumbling down,
334
00:18:41,411 --> 00:18:43,513
because I was very busy that morning.
335
00:18:44,081 --> 00:18:48,941
But I'm pretty sure
it wasn't a fucking hurricane!
336
00:18:48,961 --> 00:18:51,401
No!
337
00:18:51,421 --> 00:18:53,148
Oh!
338
00:18:53,632 --> 00:18:56,735
Guys? Guys? Guys!
339
00:18:57,553 --> 00:18:59,118
This is about trust.
340
00:18:59,138 --> 00:19:01,531
I mean, we're a family here.
341
00:19:03,475 --> 00:19:06,662
Families love each other,
families laugh together.
342
00:19:08,522 --> 00:19:10,129
We laugh all goddamn day.
343
00:19:10,149 --> 00:19:11,839
Oh, we're not a family.
344
00:19:11,859 --> 00:19:13,126
What was that?
345
00:19:14,278 --> 00:19:15,921
- What'd you just say?
- Uh...
346
00:19:16,947 --> 00:19:21,051
I said... I said, "We're not a family."
347
00:19:21,535 --> 00:19:25,055
Uh, yes, we are. It says it right there
on the fucking merch!
348
00:19:26,623 --> 00:19:29,518
Well, family don't, uh, kidnap each other.
349
00:19:44,892 --> 00:19:45,909
You just...
350
00:19:47,936 --> 00:19:49,334
Fuck!
351
00:19:49,354 --> 00:19:51,999
Way to ruin the groove, you selfish shit.
352
00:19:53,525 --> 00:19:56,592
Session's over. No more jamming today.
353
00:19:56,612 --> 00:19:59,298
Byung Sung, take that bullshit.
354
00:19:59,781 --> 00:20:01,763
God damn it!
355
00:20:01,783 --> 00:20:03,135
Nice knowing you.
356
00:20:05,412 --> 00:20:08,515
Move quickly!
357
00:20:15,714 --> 00:20:18,363
- Get in and find her. Got it?
- Yes, sir.
358
00:20:18,383 --> 00:20:19,990
Let me open the door now.
359
00:20:20,010 --> 00:20:21,575
- Get ready.
- Yes!
360
00:20:21,595 --> 00:20:22,863
Here you go.
361
00:20:27,935 --> 00:20:29,458
Get on your feet now!
362
00:20:29,478 --> 00:20:31,543
No!
363
00:20:31,563 --> 00:20:33,670
Hold her!
364
00:20:33,690 --> 00:20:35,083
Come here!
365
00:20:35,525 --> 00:20:37,382
Hey, where is it? Find it quickly!
366
00:20:37,402 --> 00:20:38,425
On your knees!
367
00:20:38,445 --> 00:20:39,676
Oh, God, please!
368
00:20:39,696 --> 00:20:41,053
What?
369
00:20:41,073 --> 00:20:44,009
Oh. Don't kill me! Please, please, please.
370
00:21:07,224 --> 00:21:10,165
Hey, Shelly, thought a lot
about what you said
371
00:21:10,185 --> 00:21:13,085
and I'd love to chitchat
over dinner up at the residence.
372
00:21:13,105 --> 00:21:14,831
Your compadre, Rex.
373
00:21:15,565 --> 00:21:17,589
P.S. Wash up, stinky!
374
00:21:17,609 --> 00:21:19,628
LOL.
375
00:21:32,082 --> 00:21:35,977
Big trucks, cold beer
376
00:21:36,461 --> 00:21:39,778
Stars and stripes
Still fly around here
377
00:21:39,798 --> 00:21:41,191
Yeah, they do
378
00:21:44,720 --> 00:21:48,448
Fast cars, hitchin' bass
379
00:21:48,890 --> 00:21:53,412
Country music and kickin' ass, yeah!
380
00:21:54,271 --> 00:21:58,208
Whoo! Yeah, kickin' ass
26414
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