Original subtitles

* Sometimes the world looks perfect

* Nothing to rearrange

* Sometimes you just get a feeling

* Like you need some kind of change

* No matter what the odds are this time

* Nothing's gonna stand in my way

* This flame in my heart

* Like a long lost friend

* Gives every dark street a light at the end

* Standing tall on the wings of my dream

* The rain and thunder

* The wind and haze

* I'm bound for better days

* It's my life and my dream

* Nothing's gonna stop me now

* Nothing's gonna stop me

* It's my life and my dream

* Nothing gonna stop me now

* Nothing gonna stop me now *

It's true. You can see yourself.

Did you make coffee?

"Make coffee". What do I look like? A percolator?

Where do I come up with them?

Of course I made coffee.

Question. What is that on your face?

Toilet paper.

Why would you put toilet paper on your face?

I cut myself shaving. Repeatedly.

There's no hot water.

that the hot water-heater was acting up.

Did you mention the sink too?

What's wrong with the sink? It don't work.

What? Well, oh.

Well, it is not draining.

Try turning on the garbage disposal--

That-- Just try.

Just-- That--

Balki, turn on the garbage disposal.

Think I found the problem.

What is it?

It's the garbage disposal.

Don't worry, I'll fix the sink.

Balki, you don't have to fix anything.

I don't?

Who do you think fixed the doorbell?

Me.

What do you mean "me"?

I don't mean you. I mean me.

I fixed the doorbell. I fixed the oven.

And now, I'm gonna go fix the sink.

Why should Mr. Twinkacetti fix our sink?

Because it's not our sink.

Oh...

Whose sink is it?

Twinkacetti is the landlord. He owns the building

and everything in it. Including the kitchen sink.

Why do you think we pay rent?

For the privilege of sleeping indoors without livestock.

Balki, get off the boat and join the world.

Hi, guys. Jennifer.

Wow.

I just love those bold American fashions.

Balki, that's a towel.

Well, of course it is. Don't be ridiculous.

Is it reversible?

Well, I'd really like to stay and chat

but I need to use your shower. Mine's broken again.

Well, help yourself. Uh, we only have cold water.

Can you believe this building?

I wish we could do something about this.

Well, I guess I just get started on that garbage disposal.

Wait a minute. We'll get Twinkacetti to fix it.

We could band together.

We stopped the war. We got women to vote.

We came that close

But cousin, Mr. Twinkacetti is a land owner

and we're just lowly common peasants.

Balki, this is a democracy.

We're all created equally lowly and common.

We'll get all the tenants together.

Make out a list of complaints and present them to Twinkacetti.

He has to listen to us.

Sure.

in a civilized manner.

I've been trying to get Twinkacetti

Dream on. The man's a rodent.

Does anyone else's living room tilt to the right?

Yes. Balki. Not a question, just a comment.

This is wonderful. Here we are, a group of total strangers

brought together by a common cause in the pursuit of justice

and the American way.

Well, thank you for sharing that.

Anything else?

Not me. We need a leader.

Cousin Larry can be the leader.

Larry, you'd be perfect.

Yes, Larry. You reek of leadership.

Really? Well, maybe I do reek a little.

All in favor of Cousin Larry say barta.

ALL: Barta.

Well, okay. Uh, I'll be the leader.

I'll type up the letter to Twinkacetti and send it to him.

Isn't he something?

We have leases and Twinkacetti has got to live up to the leases.

ALL: Yeah.

In a minute, Balki.

In fact, I think that we'll insist

that he fix everything on our list.

You know, it is time that we uh...

placed our order for Tupperware.

Um, who would like the cold cuts keeper?

Just raise your hand. One, two, three, four, five six...

Oh, hello, Mr. Twinkacetti.

Tupperware, huh?

Well, uh, actually, we're here because we have uh...

...grievances.

Leaky roof, worn-out carpet, clogged disposal...

You know I'd really like to fix these things.

You would? Oh, yes.

I-- I just have a cash flow problem I...just this week.

Both grandmothers, they... They went in for heart transplants...

Oh, please.

Oh, you poor, poor man.

And we think we have problems.

Balki, must you be the poster child for the hopelessly naive?

The man is lying. He has no grandmothers.

He probably sold them.

You lied about your nanas?

Look, you ingrates, you got no right meeting here like this.

Here's what I think of your list of grievances.

Let's get him. ALL: Yeah!

People, you are turning into an ugly mob.

Well, not you, Jennifer.

We can still work within the system.

Cousin Larry is right.

Listen to this man. He knows his history.

The Boston Tea Party. The people are angry with King George

because they pay him tax money but he don't listen to them.

So, they protest by they get together

and they dip his tea bags in the filthy, dirty harbor water

and they don't pay the tax money.

What if we protest by get-together

and don't pay our rent money.

What would you call that, Cousin Larry?

Well, I'd call it a rent-strike.

Cousin Larry calls a rent-strike.

ALL: Rent-strike! Rent-strike!

Rent strike!

This democracy, I like it.

What's going on? It must be 30 degrees.

Twenty five, I checked.

Why is the furnace off?

Why didn't my electric blanket work?

Why are you cooking over a candle?

These are easy questions.

We have no heat or electricity

because Mr. Twinkacetti turned them off.

Loose, I hope.

Twinkacetti is playing really dirty.

Nobody can survive like this here.

Give me that.

You know, the trouble with you Americans

is you can't take a little hardship.

You know, in Mypos, we lived with it constantly.

Take The Great Alfalfa Famine of '82.

Hungry sheep staring into space.

Hungry men staring back at them.

Mama asked me to help out

by selling fig cakes on the street corner.

And we only have just the one road running through my village.

So, I had to walk 50 miles to find a street corner.

And by the time I get there, I eat all my fig cakes.

Now, there's true hardship.

No.

No, true hardship is listening to that story.

I'm gonna make some coffee.

That's what I need.

Well, about that coffee.

Mr. Twinkacetti also turned off the water.

So you can't have that.

Oh, my God. I... I have to have coffee to-to cope, to exist

I need it to uh...to uh... What do you call that...

When you-- When you make up things in your mind. Think!

I can't think!

I know. I'll go to the coffee shop in the corner.

It's not open yet. Damn!

I know. I'll make it with Ginger Ale.

You can't heat it up.

All right, we'll make a fire.

We have no firewood.

We'll break up the furniture.

I don't think so. Why not?

Cousin, we're not going to burn the furniture

to make a cup of coffee.

Coffee...

You gotta get a grip on yourself.

You're right. You're right.

I've... I've got to get control. I've got to keep my wits.

Cream and sugar?

Vinnie, this is Twinkie.

I wanna put a grand on Chocoholic to win in the fifth.

Yeah, of course I'm good for it.

You think you can handle this without coffee?

I'm fine. Let me at him.

Top of the mornin', boys.

Did we all sleep warm and snuggly? Well, I sure did.

you turned off our...

Water. water.

And our...

Electricity. Electricity!

And I am... I am...

Larry Appleton. Larry Appleton. I know that!

It's everything else, I don't know!

Uh, did you boys come in here to give up?

Oh. Hmm. Just stand over there.

Yeah.

You're a...

Gee, take that back, please.

What is a riga

It's a by-product of swamp slime.

Mr. Twinkacetti, you are playing really dirty.

But you cannot push us.

We... We have... We have...

Is that fresh coffee I smell?

Fresh hot coffee. Have some, Appleton.

Oh...

Special of the day. Only ten bucks a cup.

$10 for coffee? That is outrageous.

Balki, lend me $5.

Get a grip on yourself.

You're going to pay $10 for a stupid beverage?

Yes! And don't you ever call it stupid.

Here's for half a cup.

Oh...that's good.

All right now, Twinkacetti. What was I talking about?

I noticed you turned off our heat and our water and...

And electricity. You think you're tough?

You don't know what tough is!

This is tough.

I am tough.

You should see him after a second cup.

Ooh...

I can take whatever you can dish out.

In fact, we're not giving in

until you fix everything on our list.

You heard that right. You better start respecting Cousin Larry.

Oh, but I do, Turnip. I respect Cousin Larry

just as much as I respect Cousin Moe and Cousin Curly.

Cousin, why you didn't introduce me to the rest of the family?

I forgot.

All right people, it's 7:00. Remember, we're trespassing.

Balki, get 'em moving.

Well, it's not exactly home. But it's warmer than my apartment.

I can't sleep on the floor anymore.

I'm getting a flat spot on my hair.

He's here. It's Twinkacetti. He's early. Everybody hide.

Would you look at this? They left the lights on.

Even a chimpanzee could turn off lights and be better company.

Who is it? Come out. Come on.

Morning. Lovely hair.

Hello. Warm?

Schalgelmilch. Rodent.

I know what you're going to say, Mr. Twinkacetti,

but this is all your fault.

I know it's my fault. And I'm sorry.

Oh, no. You're not gonna get away with... Hmm?

Hey, all men are brothers, right?

Who is this man?

I would like to end our little disagreement.

Yeah. Yes.

if you're willing to pay the rent today.

I'm not here, Turnip!

He says... "I'm not here, Turnip."

Oh. Well, okay. Nice chatting with you, Mr. The Finger, bye.

Vinnie says he wants to take you fishing

and to buy you a concrete vest.

Nice man.

He needs money.

Our rent money. Yes.

We got him. ALL: Yeah.

Now, listen. Listen, people. This is more than a business.

My life is at stake. Doesn't anyone care?

That silence is like a nail in my heart.

Listen, slug. I want my front door fixed. By tomorrow.

You got it, Schalgelmilch.

We want our places painted. Painted, right.

And fumigated. Okay, you got a deal!

People, listen. Don't you see what's happening?

We have not won. He has not given us everything on the list.

Bartokomous, if I could get you everything on that list

I won't have any more money for anything else.

What do you think? I just fell off the turnip truck?

Now, Max.

Right. Uh, okay?

And... And... And Susan, you...you need your ceiling fixed.

The whole thing? Uh... Okay.

Miss Schalgelmilch, your carpeting.

You're pushing me!

I'm going to call Mr. The Finger.

Okay. Okay. Okay! But that's it!

Now get Norma Rae outta here.

Oh, no, wait. There's more thing on the list. We can fight!

We can hold out! We can win!

Oh, some other time, kid. I gotta get to work.

Yeah. I gotta go look for a job.

Thanks for everything, Balki.

But, we don't have everything.

What about remodeling the recreation room?

Yeah! What about air

Air-conditioning! What about security system?

Balki, it's over. Okay.

Hey, this is great. Look! I can't see my breath.

The heat is on.

Balki, what are you doing?

I must sit among the ashes.

No, don't sit among the ashes.

I am humiliated. I make a fool of myself.

No, you didn't. You made a lot of people very happy.

I don't understand. Why they are happy? We lose.

We didn't lose. Twinkacetti's gonna spend two months

fixing this place up.

But, we don't get everything on the list.

We never planned to get everything on the list.

Cousin, you said to Mr. Twinkacetti

and I want to do what you said.

That's called negotiating. You ask for more than you want

so you get what you need.

Then, why don't you just ask for what you need?

Because you won't get it. You're right, I don't get it.

Balki, you did a great job.

I did? You did.

I did good? You did great.

You got us more than we ever expected.

You're a very good negotiator. You stood up to Twinkacetti.

I guess I did.

You were going to stop before we got washer and drier.

This building is very lucky

to have Balki Bartokomous living here.

Really? I know I'm better off.

Hi. I just want to say thank you. You were terrific.

I was talking to Balki. I knew that.

You were magnetic.

She called me a magnet.

You've got guts, Balki. I like that in a refugee.

How about coming up to my place for breakfast?

Would you like that?

Does the sheep like potato root?

That means yes, you little lamb kebab.

Don't wait up.

I'm going to negotiate with her.