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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,504 --> 00:00:05,351 - Welcome back. 2 00:00:05,435 --> 00:00:08,258 We're here talking with all-star shooting guard Charlie Sanders 3 00:00:08,341 --> 00:00:09,593 about his amazing career. 4 00:00:09,677 --> 00:00:10,770 Now, Charlie, you grew up 5 00:00:10,854 --> 00:00:12,428 in a tough neighborhood, didn't you? 6 00:00:12,512 --> 00:00:15,445 - That's right. Drugs, violence. Ripped By mstoll 7 00:00:15,882 --> 00:00:17,834 My whole life, I had to deal with adversity. 8 00:00:17,917 --> 00:00:19,806 - And that continued when you went on to the pros? 9 00:00:19,890 --> 00:00:20,658 - That's right. 10 00:00:20,742 --> 00:00:23,440 You know, fines, injuries, everything. 11 00:00:23,523 --> 00:00:25,828 No matter how big a star I am, 12 00:00:26,459 --> 00:00:28,845 I'm always gonna be dealing with adversity. 13 00:00:29,109 --> 00:00:31,315 - Adversity Johnson, what's your take on this? 14 00:00:31,398 --> 00:00:33,517 - I don't know, girl. I just like fucking with him. 15 00:00:33,600 --> 00:00:34,685 Just like, eh. - Ah! 16 00:00:34,768 --> 00:00:36,219 Come on, Adversity. 17 00:00:36,302 --> 00:00:38,488 - Deal with me, dog! [Laughs] 18 00:00:38,571 --> 00:00:39,690 [Loud slap] - [Groans] 19 00:00:39,773 --> 00:00:41,024 - [Laughs maniacally] 20 00:00:41,107 --> 00:00:43,843 I said, "Deal with me!" 21 00:00:44,577 --> 00:00:45,742 - Always. 22 00:00:45,879 --> 00:00:48,465 Wherever we go, it's... 23 00:00:48,548 --> 00:00:50,968 Come on, no, don't. Don't drink my water. 24 00:00:51,051 --> 00:00:53,236 Don't drink my water. Adversity, leave me some. 25 00:00:53,319 --> 00:00:54,805 Leave me a sip. Leave me a sip. 26 00:00:54,888 --> 00:00:56,473 Damn, come on, man. 27 00:00:56,556 --> 00:00:57,929 [Loud slap] Aah! 28 00:00:58,013 --> 00:00:59,508 - Deal with me! [Laughs] 29 00:00:59,592 --> 00:01:02,867 - This... he doesn't... I'm sorry. 30 00:01:03,063 --> 00:01:05,320 No, he doesn't pick up social cues. 31 00:01:06,466 --> 00:01:07,992 What? Here we... 32 00:01:08,501 --> 00:01:10,253 [both scream] 33 00:01:10,336 --> 00:01:13,484 - Deal with me! - Titty twister, titty twister. 34 00:01:13,940 --> 00:01:15,058 Come on. - Are you okay? 35 00:01:15,142 --> 00:01:15,926 - No! 36 00:01:16,009 --> 00:01:18,929 [Soul music] 37 00:01:19,012 --> 00:01:27,010 38 00:01:31,440 --> 00:01:33,141 Resync BluRay by LeRalouf 39 00:01:37,163 --> 00:01:39,549 - Oh! 40 00:01:39,632 --> 00:01:42,686 Hey! 41 00:01:42,769 --> 00:01:43,954 Whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo! 42 00:01:44,037 --> 00:01:47,691 [Crowd barks] 43 00:01:47,774 --> 00:01:50,794 - Don't start that. That won't stop. 44 00:01:50,877 --> 00:01:52,429 They will do that every time. 45 00:01:52,512 --> 00:01:54,097 - Good evening, everybody. I'm Keegan-Michael Key. 46 00:01:54,180 --> 00:01:55,866 - I'm Jordan Peele. - And we are Key and Peele. 47 00:01:55,949 --> 00:02:00,604 [Cheers and applause] 48 00:02:00,687 --> 00:02:03,273 - We do shows every now and then where we travel a little bit. 49 00:02:03,356 --> 00:02:05,242 And so, when we were in the airport... 50 00:02:05,325 --> 00:02:06,777 - I just wanna get there. - You get so worked up. 51 00:02:06,860 --> 00:02:08,478 - I just don't want there to be anything 52 00:02:08,561 --> 00:02:09,946 to get in the way of me getting on the flight. 53 00:02:10,029 --> 00:02:11,581 - You get impatient in the lines. 54 00:02:11,664 --> 00:02:13,483 - I do get impatient in the lines sometimes, yeah. 55 00:02:13,566 --> 00:02:15,552 - He hates it when dudes are, like, indecisive 56 00:02:15,635 --> 00:02:17,721 next to him about where they are in the line. 57 00:02:17,804 --> 00:02:18,687 Talking about... 58 00:02:20,173 --> 00:02:24,054 [laughter] 59 00:02:30,350 --> 00:02:32,215 - [Laughs] 60 00:02:33,586 --> 00:02:34,938 - What are you doing right now? 61 00:02:35,021 --> 00:02:36,306 - I'm sorry, I can't hear what... 62 00:02:36,531 --> 00:02:39,956 What'd you say? - Are you in line, sir? 63 00:02:40,040 --> 00:02:41,025 - Oh, I was gonna ask you the same thing. 64 00:02:41,109 --> 00:02:42,279 - Yeah, I'm definitely in line. 65 00:02:42,362 --> 00:02:43,580 - Yeah, yeah, me too. I'm in line with you. 66 00:02:43,663 --> 00:02:44,981 - No, no. - I'm in line with you. 67 00:02:45,064 --> 00:02:46,603 - No, sir, you are perpendicular to the line. 68 00:02:46,687 --> 00:02:47,684 - We going that way. We going that way. 69 00:02:47,767 --> 00:02:49,086 - We're definitely going this way. 70 00:02:49,169 --> 00:02:50,765 The plane's gonna be this way. - Yeah. 71 00:02:50,849 --> 00:02:52,463 - So if you face this way, you're gonna be out of luck. 72 00:02:52,547 --> 00:02:54,879 - Nah, I crab-walk. I crab-walk. 73 00:02:57,577 --> 00:02:59,568 That's me. 74 00:03:02,615 --> 00:03:03,733 - Good morning, ladies and gentlemen. 75 00:03:03,816 --> 00:03:05,535 We are about to begin boarding 76 00:03:05,618 --> 00:03:09,306 South Northern Airlines flight 34 to Grand Rapids. 77 00:03:09,389 --> 00:03:11,675 - Okay, excuse me. Boarding group one. 78 00:03:11,758 --> 00:03:12,709 I'm in boarding group one. Excuse me. 79 00:03:12,792 --> 00:03:13,812 I'm in boarding group one. 80 00:03:13,896 --> 00:03:17,914 - And we would like to begin pre-boarding 81 00:03:17,997 --> 00:03:19,516 with our first-class passengers. 82 00:03:19,599 --> 00:03:21,632 First-class passengers only, please. 83 00:03:25,154 --> 00:03:28,679 Next, our business-class passengers may now board. 84 00:03:30,570 --> 00:03:32,095 Okay, now we would like to welcome 85 00:03:32,178 --> 00:03:35,066 our Regal Alliance Elite members. 86 00:03:35,150 --> 00:03:37,875 Regal Alliance Elite members. 87 00:03:40,703 --> 00:03:43,106 Okay, now all passengers with children. 88 00:03:43,189 --> 00:03:44,476 - Okay. 89 00:03:44,560 --> 00:03:46,479 - Anyone with small children, you may board now. 90 00:03:46,793 --> 00:03:49,379 [Child fussing] 91 00:03:49,462 --> 00:03:51,247 Okay, we would like to continue boarding 92 00:03:51,330 --> 00:03:53,251 with uniformed military personnel. 93 00:03:53,335 --> 00:03:54,951 - What? Why can't... 94 00:03:55,034 --> 00:03:57,053 This is... Thank you for your service. 95 00:03:57,136 --> 00:03:58,054 Thank you so much for your service. 96 00:03:58,137 --> 00:03:59,122 God bless you. 97 00:03:59,205 --> 00:04:00,460 - Thank you for your service. 98 00:04:00,544 --> 00:04:02,063 Thank you for your service. 99 00:04:02,259 --> 00:04:04,500 All right, people in wheelchairs. 100 00:04:06,078 --> 00:04:09,712 Any priests, nuns, rabbis, imams. 101 00:04:09,796 --> 00:04:11,801 - What? Why do they get special treatment? 102 00:04:11,884 --> 00:04:13,036 - As-salaam alaikum. 103 00:04:13,119 --> 00:04:14,562 - I've never... 104 00:04:15,288 --> 00:04:16,421 That's typical. 105 00:04:16,505 --> 00:04:18,974 - Any old people in wheelchairs with babies? 106 00:04:19,058 --> 00:04:22,726 [Baby cries] 107 00:04:22,810 --> 00:04:25,497 Any old, religious people with military babies? 108 00:04:25,581 --> 00:04:27,031 - What's a military... 109 00:04:30,570 --> 00:04:32,304 - Thank you for your service. 110 00:04:34,073 --> 00:04:36,337 Jason Schwartzman. 111 00:04:43,941 --> 00:04:46,997 Anyone with a blue suitcase, you may now board. 112 00:04:47,081 --> 00:04:48,175 - Finally. 113 00:04:48,259 --> 00:04:50,425 - No, not you, sir. - Not me? 114 00:04:50,509 --> 00:04:53,167 This is a blue suitcase. - That's a blue computer bag. 115 00:04:53,251 --> 00:04:55,308 - So you're not... You're not gonna let me on then? 116 00:04:59,532 --> 00:05:01,985 - [Sips loudly] 117 00:05:02,730 --> 00:05:03,818 - Damn it! 118 00:05:03,902 --> 00:05:06,756 Damn it, damn it, damn it, damn it, damn it! 119 00:05:06,839 --> 00:05:08,410 God damn it! 120 00:05:08,822 --> 00:05:11,152 - Anyone who doesn't seem cranky. 121 00:05:15,910 --> 00:05:17,262 Drunk people. 122 00:05:17,346 --> 00:05:20,957 We will now be boarding any drunk people. 123 00:05:21,040 --> 00:05:22,894 Drunk people may board. 124 00:05:25,358 --> 00:05:27,074 - [Grunts] 125 00:05:27,158 --> 00:05:28,643 All right, it's... 126 00:05:28,727 --> 00:05:30,079 No, it's my bag. 127 00:05:30,295 --> 00:05:32,597 Sir, just... 128 00:05:32,681 --> 00:05:34,410 [groans] 129 00:05:34,867 --> 00:05:36,683 Just... 130 00:05:47,839 --> 00:05:49,597 [phone rings] - Ooh. 131 00:05:50,016 --> 00:05:51,089 Hello? 132 00:05:51,517 --> 00:05:52,863 Oh, hey, Christian. 133 00:05:53,519 --> 00:05:55,972 Yeah. Totally. 134 00:05:56,425 --> 00:05:58,824 Well, you have your favorites, and I have my favorites. 135 00:05:59,625 --> 00:06:00,605 [Laughs] Okay. 136 00:06:01,361 --> 00:06:02,503 Call you later. 137 00:06:02,762 --> 00:06:06,027 Ciao, ciao. [Hangs up receiver] 138 00:06:09,369 --> 00:06:11,132 Boarding group one. 139 00:06:11,804 --> 00:06:14,190 [Dramatic music] 140 00:06:14,273 --> 00:06:18,461 141 00:06:18,544 --> 00:06:20,530 - Has anybody seen Jason Schwartzman? 142 00:06:20,613 --> 00:06:22,032 - Jason Schwartzman! 143 00:06:22,115 --> 00:06:24,834 - Stick up your hand! Gotta find him. Jason! 144 00:06:24,917 --> 00:06:26,202 - Jason Schwartzman! 145 00:06:26,285 --> 00:06:28,241 - I got him! 146 00:06:28,325 --> 00:06:30,239 I got Schwartzman here! 147 00:06:30,323 --> 00:06:33,043 - Everyone, Jason Schwartzman's fine! 148 00:06:33,126 --> 00:06:35,011 [All cheering] 149 00:06:35,094 --> 00:06:38,757 - I got Jason Schwartzman. Let's wrap it up, people. 150 00:06:39,098 --> 00:06:41,148 - Boarding group one over here! 151 00:06:41,334 --> 00:06:43,515 Got a boarding group one. [Groans] 152 00:06:47,109 --> 00:06:48,992 - You know, everybody's had this happen to you, 153 00:06:49,075 --> 00:06:50,860 where somebody's telling you a story, 154 00:06:51,155 --> 00:06:52,829 and halfway through the story, you realize 155 00:06:52,912 --> 00:06:56,126 they're telling you the story you told them three weeks ago? 156 00:06:56,210 --> 00:06:57,467 - It's maddening. 157 00:06:57,550 --> 00:06:58,468 - Dude just come up to you, talking about, 158 00:06:58,551 --> 00:06:59,803 hey, man, y'all see, 159 00:06:59,886 --> 00:07:01,004 I was walking down the street, right? 160 00:07:01,087 --> 00:07:03,039 - Uh-huh? - And this bird... 161 00:07:03,122 --> 00:07:04,174 - Yeah. - Flew up... 162 00:07:04,257 --> 00:07:05,842 - Yep? - Hit my shoulder... 163 00:07:05,925 --> 00:07:09,279 - Yup, yup. - That shit died on impact. 164 00:07:09,362 --> 00:07:10,751 - Was that bird a sparrow? 165 00:07:10,835 --> 00:07:12,382 - Yeah, yeah, yeah. 166 00:07:12,465 --> 00:07:14,735 - Did that happen on Santa Monica Boulevard? 167 00:07:14,819 --> 00:07:16,610 - Yes. - Right off of Las Palmas? 168 00:07:16,694 --> 00:07:18,210 - How you know that, man? I told you this story? 169 00:07:18,294 --> 00:07:23,342 - No, because I told you this story literally a day ago. 170 00:07:23,426 --> 00:07:24,344 - I tell you about this other thing 171 00:07:24,427 --> 00:07:25,945 that happened to me, though? 172 00:07:26,028 --> 00:07:27,313 - I didn't, but I can't wait to hear it. 173 00:07:27,396 --> 00:07:29,366 - Walking down the street, man, 174 00:07:29,532 --> 00:07:31,684 I just felt a drop on my bald head. 175 00:07:31,767 --> 00:07:35,760 [Laughter] 176 00:07:36,906 --> 00:07:39,826 [Electronic music] 177 00:07:39,909 --> 00:07:41,628 178 00:07:41,711 --> 00:07:44,737 - Nooice! [All cheering] 179 00:07:49,452 --> 00:07:50,703 Nooice! 180 00:07:50,786 --> 00:07:53,084 [All cheering] 181 00:07:57,727 --> 00:07:58,845 Nooice! 182 00:07:58,928 --> 00:08:00,297 - Nooice! 183 00:08:01,664 --> 00:08:06,853 [All cheering] 184 00:08:06,936 --> 00:08:08,221 - Nooice! - Nooice! 185 00:08:08,304 --> 00:08:10,523 - [Laughs] 186 00:08:10,606 --> 00:08:13,526 [Dramatic music] 187 00:08:13,609 --> 00:08:16,529 188 00:08:16,612 --> 00:08:18,431 - 'Scuse me, 'scuse me. 'Scuse me. 189 00:08:18,514 --> 00:08:20,900 'Scuse me. 'Scuse me, 'scuse me. 190 00:08:20,983 --> 00:08:23,603 'Scuse me, 'scuse me, 'scuse me. 191 00:08:23,686 --> 00:08:26,062 - What's up? What's up, boo? 192 00:08:26,491 --> 00:08:29,177 - What you doing? - I'm just nooicing the nooice! 193 00:08:29,291 --> 00:08:30,515 - Well, don't. 194 00:08:31,327 --> 00:08:32,922 It's mostly about the dancers. 195 00:08:33,006 --> 00:08:34,046 - Oh, yeah. 196 00:08:34,130 --> 00:08:35,548 - Besides, you know, 197 00:08:35,631 --> 00:08:37,450 I'm kind of the guy that says "nooice!" 198 00:08:37,648 --> 00:08:39,419 - Nooice! - What happened? 199 00:08:39,502 --> 00:08:41,254 - Nothing happened, I just nooiced you 200 00:08:41,337 --> 00:08:42,789 because of you standing up for yourself 201 00:08:42,872 --> 00:08:44,691 and your place in this dance circle. 202 00:08:44,774 --> 00:08:46,893 - No, no. No "nooice," okay? 203 00:08:46,976 --> 00:08:48,234 "Nooice" is my thing. 204 00:08:48,978 --> 00:08:51,062 No more "nooice" from you. 205 00:08:54,609 --> 00:08:56,035 'Scuse me, 'scuse me, 'scuse me. 206 00:08:56,118 --> 00:08:57,904 [Dramatic music] 207 00:08:57,987 --> 00:09:00,907 [Electronic music] 208 00:09:00,990 --> 00:09:04,477 209 00:09:04,560 --> 00:09:05,778 Aw, nooice! 210 00:09:05,861 --> 00:09:08,887 [All cheering] 211 00:09:20,281 --> 00:09:21,771 Nooice? 212 00:09:23,651 --> 00:09:25,544 Nooice? 213 00:09:31,554 --> 00:09:34,474 [Sweeping dramatic music] 214 00:09:34,557 --> 00:09:42,555 215 00:09:44,233 --> 00:09:45,518 [exhales] 216 00:09:45,999 --> 00:09:47,383 Nooice! 217 00:09:48,008 --> 00:09:49,969 [Panicked] Nooice! 218 00:09:50,053 --> 00:09:51,638 Nooice! Nooice! 219 00:09:51,722 --> 00:09:54,190 Nooice! Nooice! 220 00:10:00,461 --> 00:10:01,781 Nooice! 221 00:10:06,122 --> 00:10:09,477 [Thunder] 222 00:10:09,648 --> 00:10:11,391 Nooice. 223 00:10:12,094 --> 00:10:13,846 [Dramatic music] 224 00:10:13,929 --> 00:10:14,881 - Nooice. 225 00:10:14,964 --> 00:10:18,184 226 00:10:18,267 --> 00:10:19,203 - Nooice. 227 00:10:21,403 --> 00:10:24,395 - You... Nooice? 228 00:10:27,810 --> 00:10:29,801 - [Crying] Nooice. 229 00:10:35,151 --> 00:10:36,618 - [Exhales] 230 00:10:42,291 --> 00:10:43,610 Nooice. 231 00:10:46,929 --> 00:10:48,516 - Nooice. 232 00:10:53,494 --> 00:10:55,445 - Nooice! 233 00:10:56,282 --> 00:10:57,901 [Cries] - Nooice. 234 00:10:57,985 --> 00:11:01,906 Nooice. - Nooice. 235 00:11:02,065 --> 00:11:03,417 - Nooice! 236 00:11:03,501 --> 00:11:06,805 237 00:11:07,516 --> 00:11:11,453 Both: Nooice! 238 00:11:15,090 --> 00:11:17,844 - Nooice! - Nooice! 239 00:11:17,927 --> 00:11:24,162 240 00:11:25,868 --> 00:11:28,521 This is the fight everybody's been waiting for, 241 00:11:28,604 --> 00:11:30,757 but when I get Andre in the ring, man, 242 00:11:30,840 --> 00:11:33,506 it's gonna be cruel and quick, 243 00:11:33,876 --> 00:11:36,882 'cause it's gonna be like, one-two, one-two, boom, 244 00:11:36,966 --> 00:11:37,964 and you out. 245 00:11:38,047 --> 00:11:40,115 - Man, fuck you, Claudius Lewis. 246 00:11:40,199 --> 00:11:42,218 I'm gonna fuck you right in the ass. 247 00:11:42,384 --> 00:11:43,903 Yeah, I'm gonna bend you over 248 00:11:43,986 --> 00:11:45,772 and fuck you right in the asshole. 249 00:11:45,855 --> 00:11:47,646 - All right, you know what? 250 00:11:47,748 --> 00:11:49,333 Andre, he like to be... 251 00:11:49,454 --> 00:11:50,739 try to get into his opponents' heads 252 00:11:50,823 --> 00:11:52,412 by saying crazy stuff. 253 00:11:52,496 --> 00:11:54,946 He ain't gonna get into my head. He ain't gonna get into my head. 254 00:11:55,030 --> 00:11:56,082 - No, I'm not gonna get in your head. 255 00:11:56,165 --> 00:11:57,483 I'm gonna get in your asshole, 256 00:11:57,566 --> 00:11:59,118 just like I said, just right up in there 257 00:11:59,201 --> 00:12:01,487 in that tiny, little, miniscule asshole of yours. 258 00:12:01,570 --> 00:12:02,789 This is what's gonna happen. 259 00:12:02,872 --> 00:12:04,056 I'm gonna take you to a nice, 260 00:12:04,139 --> 00:12:06,592 high-fancy, highfalutin restaurant, 261 00:12:06,675 --> 00:12:08,795 and I'm gonna buy you things, wine and dine you. 262 00:12:08,878 --> 00:12:10,563 And we're gonna find some things that we have in common, 263 00:12:10,646 --> 00:12:12,665 and they're gonna become inside jokes to us. 264 00:12:12,748 --> 00:12:14,808 And then, we're just gonna laugh about them in the taxi 265 00:12:14,892 --> 00:12:16,310 all the way to your house, 266 00:12:16,418 --> 00:12:18,199 where I'm gonna fuck you in the ass. 267 00:12:19,922 --> 00:12:21,418 - Oh, okay, now, 268 00:12:21,844 --> 00:12:25,177 just me p-personally, I've never... 269 00:12:25,261 --> 00:12:27,413 You know, I ain't never seen Andre 270 00:12:27,496 --> 00:12:29,699 take it that far before, 271 00:12:30,138 --> 00:12:32,257 but... [chuckles] 272 00:12:32,746 --> 00:12:33,820 What... whatever. 273 00:12:33,903 --> 00:12:35,387 - Yeah, whatever. I'll tell you whatever. 274 00:12:35,471 --> 00:12:36,989 Whatever, I'm gonna finally gonna feel comfortable 275 00:12:37,072 --> 00:12:38,658 taking you out to dinner parties. 276 00:12:38,741 --> 00:12:40,459 And then all of our friends who are also couples, 277 00:12:40,542 --> 00:12:42,295 they're just gonna laugh at us 278 00:12:42,378 --> 00:12:44,163 'cause we're that couple that holds hands all the time. 279 00:12:44,246 --> 00:12:45,364 Let me tell you something, Claudius. 280 00:12:45,447 --> 00:12:47,209 We love each other so very much 281 00:12:47,293 --> 00:12:48,968 that no matter how tired I am, 282 00:12:49,051 --> 00:12:51,295 no matter how much bullshit I've dealt with over the day, 283 00:12:51,379 --> 00:12:52,437 I'm just gonna leave it at the door 284 00:12:52,521 --> 00:12:53,928 when I fuck you in the ass. 285 00:12:54,012 --> 00:12:55,107 - Okay, you know what, man? 286 00:12:55,190 --> 00:12:57,510 It's time for you to stop all that nonsense 287 00:12:57,593 --> 00:12:59,176 right now, all right? 288 00:12:59,762 --> 00:13:01,881 Did he just say he was gonna take me to dinner parties? 289 00:13:01,964 --> 00:13:03,691 - He did say "dinner parties." 290 00:13:04,867 --> 00:13:06,886 - We're gonna snuggle on the couch every night. 291 00:13:06,969 --> 00:13:08,287 I'm gonna let you pick the movie, 292 00:13:08,370 --> 00:13:10,189 even though you always pick the movie. 293 00:13:10,272 --> 00:13:12,558 Then I'm gonna take you out for a walk on the beach, 294 00:13:12,641 --> 00:13:15,061 and the moonlight's gonna bounce off of your scalp. 295 00:13:15,144 --> 00:13:17,230 And I'm just gonna kiss you so tenderly 296 00:13:17,313 --> 00:13:20,233 while the waves break, and then right there, right then, 297 00:13:20,316 --> 00:13:22,668 I'm gonna fuck you in the sandy asshole. 298 00:13:22,751 --> 00:13:24,470 - All right, it's time for you to shut your fool mouth! 299 00:13:24,553 --> 00:13:26,339 - Is it? Is it time? - Yes, it is time. 300 00:13:26,422 --> 00:13:27,874 It's time for you to shut your mouth! 301 00:13:27,957 --> 00:13:29,575 - We gonna spend the golden years together. 302 00:13:29,658 --> 00:13:31,244 - Oh, yeah? Oh, yeah? - Yeah. Yeah. 303 00:13:31,327 --> 00:13:32,545 I'm gonna support you all the way 304 00:13:32,628 --> 00:13:34,247 through your run through city council. 305 00:13:34,330 --> 00:13:35,381 Yeah, that's right, and you're gonna be tired 306 00:13:35,464 --> 00:13:36,849 and exhausted and overworked, 307 00:13:36,932 --> 00:13:38,251 but we're gonna still find the energy 308 00:13:38,334 --> 00:13:39,986 to go antiquing on the weekends. - Oh, yeah? 309 00:13:40,069 --> 00:13:41,554 - And then you're gonna be on your deathbed, 310 00:13:41,637 --> 00:13:42,588 and you're gonna be sitting there, 311 00:13:42,671 --> 00:13:44,390 and you're gonna be dying. 312 00:13:44,473 --> 00:13:46,025 I'm gonna be right beside you, and I'm gonna be crying. 313 00:13:46,108 --> 00:13:48,394 And right at that moment when you cross over 314 00:13:48,477 --> 00:13:49,896 from this world into the next, 315 00:13:49,979 --> 00:13:52,531 I'm gonna fuck you in the asshole. 316 00:13:52,614 --> 00:13:54,200 - Oh, man, I wish you'd try. 317 00:13:54,283 --> 00:13:55,401 - Oh, you do? - I wish that you would try. 318 00:13:55,484 --> 00:13:57,270 - Well, wish fucking granted. 319 00:13:57,353 --> 00:13:58,271 [Soft jazz music] 320 00:13:58,354 --> 00:13:59,872 [Laughter] 321 00:13:59,955 --> 00:14:02,909 No, I love the Village as much as the next guy, 322 00:14:02,992 --> 00:14:04,744 but I'm telling you, if we continue 323 00:14:04,827 --> 00:14:07,580 to self-segregate ourselves, the entire gay community's 324 00:14:07,663 --> 00:14:09,683 gonna continue to be "margarine-ized." 325 00:14:09,767 --> 00:14:11,519 I was just saying this to Claudius the other night 326 00:14:11,603 --> 00:14:13,118 right after I fucked him in the ass. 327 00:14:13,202 --> 00:14:14,668 - Yeah, he did, he did. 328 00:14:15,337 --> 00:14:17,249 - Anyway, enough politics. Cheers, everyone. 329 00:14:17,333 --> 00:14:19,105 All: Cheers. 330 00:14:21,944 --> 00:14:24,818 - You know when people pour their 40s 331 00:14:24,902 --> 00:14:26,065 for the memories of their fallen homies? 332 00:14:26,148 --> 00:14:27,900 - You pour it out for your homies a little bit? 333 00:14:27,983 --> 00:14:30,903 Mm-hmm. Could you pick a more disreputable liquid? 334 00:14:30,986 --> 00:14:32,104 - Yeah. 335 00:14:32,187 --> 00:14:34,308 You can urinate on a grave 336 00:14:34,392 --> 00:14:37,346 and be doing a better justice to your fallen homey 337 00:14:37,430 --> 00:14:39,035 than some Olde English. 338 00:14:39,119 --> 00:14:40,612 - Yeah, it seems like the kind of thing 339 00:14:40,696 --> 00:14:43,051 that people in ancient times would do 340 00:14:43,135 --> 00:14:46,484 to a fallen enemy, not a comrade. 341 00:14:46,568 --> 00:14:49,422 - [British accent] Let's get the shittiest ale. 342 00:14:49,505 --> 00:14:52,825 - [British accent] Oh, and take this fucking piss water... 343 00:14:52,908 --> 00:14:54,394 - Ah, ah. 344 00:14:54,478 --> 00:14:57,262 - And dump it on these blasted Saxons. 345 00:14:57,346 --> 00:14:59,065 [Both shout] 346 00:14:59,148 --> 00:15:00,933 - [Normal voice] Why do English people always squat? 347 00:15:01,016 --> 00:15:02,335 - [Normal voice] I don't know why they do it, but they do. 348 00:15:02,418 --> 00:15:03,832 It's a fact... they squat. - They squat. 349 00:15:03,916 --> 00:15:06,629 - Those sons of bitches squat. 350 00:15:08,746 --> 00:15:11,254 - Hey, y'all, for real, though, 351 00:15:11,680 --> 00:15:13,121 this right here... - Yeah. 352 00:15:13,228 --> 00:15:16,090 - This goes out to all our fallen homies, yo. 353 00:15:16,658 --> 00:15:18,411 Come on. - Hey, yo, real talk. 354 00:15:18,495 --> 00:15:19,488 - All right? 355 00:15:20,369 --> 00:15:23,395 [Liquid splashing] 356 00:15:27,076 --> 00:15:28,398 - I mean, 357 00:15:30,079 --> 00:15:32,327 it just seems like a waste. 358 00:15:32,450 --> 00:15:33,507 Right? 359 00:15:35,784 --> 00:15:37,069 Does that make me a dick? 360 00:15:38,252 --> 00:15:39,337 Okay, I'm a dick. Okay, I'm a dick. 361 00:15:39,421 --> 00:15:40,840 - Come on, man. - I'm sorry. 362 00:15:40,923 --> 00:15:42,530 I'm a big ol' dick. - Let's go. 363 00:15:42,614 --> 00:15:45,233 - Okay, here... For our homies. 364 00:15:53,936 --> 00:15:55,621 - Come on, man. - What you doing? 365 00:15:55,704 --> 00:15:57,156 - Pour out the damn beer, man. - Let's go. 366 00:15:57,239 --> 00:15:58,372 - Okay, okay. Fine, fine. 367 00:16:02,877 --> 00:16:04,830 Glug, glug, glug. Glug, glug, glug... 368 00:16:04,913 --> 00:16:06,365 - No, come on, man. 369 00:16:06,448 --> 00:16:07,366 Hey, man, you got your thumb in there, man. 370 00:16:07,449 --> 00:16:08,667 - Okay, okay, okay. 371 00:16:08,750 --> 00:16:11,203 - You need to respect our homies. 372 00:16:11,286 --> 00:16:12,745 - Jeez, okay. Okay. 373 00:16:13,655 --> 00:16:14,893 For the homies. 374 00:16:15,081 --> 00:16:17,343 - Wha... - Nigga, a trash beer? 375 00:16:17,426 --> 00:16:20,448 - What? Come on. Hey, beer is beer! 376 00:16:20,619 --> 00:16:23,442 The... Jeez. I cannot win on this. 377 00:16:23,526 --> 00:16:24,750 - What? - Fine. 378 00:16:24,833 --> 00:16:27,026 I'm not on board with this, but I'll do it. 379 00:16:28,010 --> 00:16:31,590 [Liquid splashing] 380 00:16:31,809 --> 00:16:33,395 - Hey, man, what you doing? What you doing? 381 00:16:33,479 --> 00:16:35,542 - Oh, really? That don't count? 382 00:16:35,881 --> 00:16:37,729 - Aw, hey, put that... That's not for... 383 00:16:37,813 --> 00:16:39,081 Aw, man. 384 00:16:39,362 --> 00:16:40,366 - Ahh. 385 00:16:40,449 --> 00:16:41,934 It's more of a symbol than a gesture. 386 00:16:42,017 --> 00:16:43,792 Somebody back me up on this. Right? 387 00:16:43,876 --> 00:16:45,704 - Hey, man, that's disrespectful right there. 388 00:16:45,787 --> 00:16:47,039 You just do it. 389 00:16:47,122 --> 00:16:49,424 - Fine, fine! I'll pour it out! 390 00:16:49,508 --> 00:16:51,854 I'll waste the damn beer then! 391 00:16:58,433 --> 00:17:00,586 [Groans] 392 00:17:00,669 --> 00:17:02,955 You know, I'm... I'm just not a waster. 393 00:17:03,038 --> 00:17:06,225 You know, I save everything. Jamal knows. 394 00:17:06,471 --> 00:17:08,394 If he eat a piece of pizza and don't eat the crust, 395 00:17:08,477 --> 00:17:09,595 I eat the crust. 396 00:17:09,971 --> 00:17:11,897 If we do a drive-by shooting, 397 00:17:11,980 --> 00:17:13,432 I will go back for the shell cases. 398 00:17:13,515 --> 00:17:15,057 Not to hide the evidence, 399 00:17:15,484 --> 00:17:18,065 but because you can recycle those. 400 00:17:18,201 --> 00:17:21,145 They have value, man, just like this beer. 401 00:17:21,229 --> 00:17:23,159 I can't waste nothing, y'all. 402 00:17:23,243 --> 00:17:26,643 It's physically impossible for me to waste this. 403 00:17:26,995 --> 00:17:28,323 I can't do it. 404 00:17:29,682 --> 00:17:31,948 Jamal, can you pour it out for me? 405 00:17:37,174 --> 00:17:39,822 - Oh, man. Both: Come on, man. 406 00:17:39,906 --> 00:17:41,392 - I mean, it's not gonna bring 'em back. 407 00:17:41,476 --> 00:17:43,431 - Stupid. - It's not gonna bring 'em back. 408 00:17:50,340 --> 00:17:52,790 [Metallic clicking] 409 00:17:52,874 --> 00:17:54,406 - [Groans] - All right, partner. 410 00:17:54,489 --> 00:17:56,407 Take this scumbag downtown 411 00:17:56,658 --> 00:17:59,267 before the Mexicans find him and blow his ass away. 412 00:17:59,892 --> 00:18:01,900 - We're gonna keep you alive, chlco. 413 00:18:02,531 --> 00:18:03,449 Comprende? 414 00:18:03,532 --> 00:18:06,447 - [Laughs] - Come on. 415 00:18:10,001 --> 00:18:13,092 [Dramatic music] 416 00:18:13,175 --> 00:18:21,173 417 00:19:01,290 --> 00:19:04,782 - [sustained] No! 418 00:20:01,534 --> 00:20:04,087 [Crying] 419 00:20:04,279 --> 00:20:09,168 No! 420 00:20:09,291 --> 00:20:10,643 [Bird squawks] 421 00:20:10,726 --> 00:20:13,098 [Explosion, bird crows] 422 00:20:15,864 --> 00:20:17,410 What? Is that a bird? 423 00:20:17,666 --> 00:20:18,964 - Hey! 424 00:20:19,368 --> 00:20:20,919 Do you know what happened? 425 00:20:21,002 --> 00:20:23,289 - No. 426 00:20:23,372 --> 00:20:24,566 Oh! 427 00:20:28,971 --> 00:20:30,890 Oh, I get it. 428 00:20:31,146 --> 00:20:33,385 When I say "no," stuff blows up. 429 00:20:33,469 --> 00:20:38,225 [Explosion, glass shatters] 430 00:20:38,309 --> 00:20:40,041 Cool. 431 00:20:41,346 --> 00:20:43,242 - What'd you think about that show, man? 432 00:20:43,325 --> 00:20:44,977 - What'd I think about that show that just happened right there? 433 00:20:45,060 --> 00:20:47,279 - That happened right there. - Man, that jam was nooice! 434 00:20:47,362 --> 00:20:49,248 - Come on. 435 00:20:49,331 --> 00:20:51,713 - Good night, everybody. 436 00:20:52,167 --> 00:20:56,522 [Cheers and applause] 437 00:20:56,605 --> 00:20:59,525 - I'm gonna do my one line here 438 00:20:59,608 --> 00:21:01,667 - Oh, yeah. 439 00:21:03,529 --> 00:21:05,511 - If you went whoosh and shot an arrow at somebody, 440 00:21:05,595 --> 00:21:06,862 and then you cut to the hero in slow motion, 441 00:21:06,946 --> 00:21:08,224 and the hero's talking about... 442 00:21:08,308 --> 00:21:10,887 - Talking about... [mimics suspenseful music] 443 00:21:10,970 --> 00:21:15,959 444 00:21:16,042 --> 00:21:18,601 Both: Aah! Ripped By mstoll 445 00:21:18,656 --> 00:21:19,578 Resync BluRay by LeRalouf 446 00:21:19,628 --> 00:21:24,178 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 31088

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