All language subtitles for Rupaul e06

- ♪ MTV ♪

- This season on
the Tournament of All Stars,

18 queens compete in three
brackets for a chance

to face off in the finals

and win a grand prize
of $200,000.

Last week, Bracket 2
competed in the second

of three episodes.

- You're giving me your point.

And then, Kerri,
you're giving Jorgeous

her point, then vice versa.

- Here, Ms. Bruce.
Keep it in the family.

Jorgeous, I'm going to go
ahead and swap with you, honey.

- And as Nicole said,
we're keeping the Brooks

in the family, and we're
not really related,

so here's my point, Jorgeous.
- Oh!

Oh, my God, thank you, sister.
- I love you, sister.

And let me get my bag.

Period.

- I was bullied into giving
my point to Mistress.

- You're just going to fully
fuck your friend over?

- For the first time
in "Drag Race" herstory,

we're going to have
ourselves a rapping roast.

[all cheering]

- Say I do put you last.

You're not in the top.

You have an extra
point to throw around.

Where are you going
to throw that point?

- If you throw me a bone,
I could definitely

throw something back to you.

- OK.

- Do you want some?
- Yes, please.

- It'll cost you a point.

- Now.

- Lydia and I are flirting
with some sort of alliance.

I hope if it came down
to it, and Lydia and I

were in the position
where she could give

me a point, that she would.

- Jorgeous.

- Your lyrics
were 10 out of 10.

- I loved the dancing.
You're so good.

- Mistress Brooks.

- You ate.

- The top two All Stars
of the week

are Mistress Isabelle Brooks
and Jorgeous.

[applause]

Condragulations.

You've each earned two points.

Ladies, this is your chance
to impress me,

win $10,000, and earn
a coveted extra point.

Jorgeous,
Mistress Isabelle Brooks.

We have a tie.

- Oh, my God!

- You've earned
a half point each.

As the bottom four queens,
I'll let you decide

which All Star
deserves your MVQ points.

[tense music]

- Oh!

- [gasps] Why, yes!

- That looks a bit
uglier than last week.

- We have one week
left, and I still

have zero points on the board.

I need to get
at least one or two points

from some
of my sisters to have

a chance at the semifinals.

I'll be damned
if I see a double zero

by the end of tonight.

- This is probably my last time
being able to do this,

because I'm an elder.

So if you want
to gift me some points

so that I can possibly
carry on through the thing,

I would really appreciate it.

- There's only three spots,
and I wasn't too happy

how things went down last week,
because I believe that people

do deserve a fighting chance.

So it's anyone's game,
and right now, it's not.

You know, they're leaps
and bounds ahead of us, so.

- I would agree with that.

- Honey, last week, points were
given away, shady as fuck,

and we discussed trying
to make sure everybody has

an even spread
of these points.

- If y'all are the bottom
queens, how are y'all going

to dictate the points?

- We can easily
pass it between us.

- Yeah.
- Yeah.

- At least those shady
little munchkins,

Mistress and Jorgeous--
they ain't giving

no points out tonight.

So this could be the perfect
time to right that wrong.

- Well, well, well.

- Yes!

- Well, hello, divas!

- Congratulations!

- Look at your
shiny new badges.

- Congratulations.

- Thank you.

- I finally won
a fucking roast.

I was like--
- Yes!

- Honestly, I think
me and Mistress

are playing this game
perfectly,

the way that God intended it,

because we are tied
for first place,

and I'm so close
to that semifinal round.

I just feel it in my bones.

- We were talking a little bit
about the MVQ badges.

- Yes.

- And what is the consensus
on the badges?

- We're not giving y'all none.

- I think we're going to try to
even things out a little bit.

Here's the thing.

I did have my
conversation with Lydia,

and I think we have
an understanding

of what we're going to do
to help each other out.

But if you're
becoming a Brooks,

I guess that means you're
not too trustworthy.

- Let me hold your hand.

You know what to do.

- So it is completely
impossible to predict

how this is going to go.

- OK, I'm going to
make it for last week,

and I'm going to
give it to Ms. Colby,

because that's what
my plan was last week,

and I got intercepted
and lied to and deceived.

It won't happen again.

- Should I go next?

- Kerri, I think you should
gag and give it to me.

- I do have a great
gag reflex, but I

am going to gift my point...

To Miss Lydia Butthole Brooks.

- Oh, gag.

- Oh, my God!

- I thought she was
supposed to give it to you.

- She can do whatever
she wants with it.

- Girl, what? I thought y'all
were splitting it even.

- No, it's--
we're not doing your stuff.

She's doing what
she wants, honey.

- You know what?
I'm good with my decisions.

You deserve it.

- Thank you.

I'm on the board.

I got a point!

- Daughter,
do what you're going

to fucking do, because
you'll be holding your own.

Do--I believe in you.

- Upon lots of deliberation
in my own mind,

I'm going to give my
point to Kerri Colby.

- Thank you.

- What the fuck?

- And I apologize to anyone
who I did not give it to.

- This is fucking bullshit.

These girls must be
really scared of me.

I'm not the only one
out of that ceremony

who didn't get any points.

- Now Tina's hot.

- No, I'm not hot.

There's a game being played,
and that's fine.

The fact that
Lydia did me dirty

is not something I saw coming.

- Well, none of us
have zero now.

That's great.
- Yes!

- OK.
- We're all on the board.

- I think Jorgeous and I
are in the lead with 4.5.

- Next is Lydia, with four.

- Oh, my God,
she's on our ass, sister.

- Tina and I are tied for two.

- Yes, honey.

Two points apiece, mama.

- And I'm well
on my way to winning.

- Yes, hunty.

- Yes.

- Let's get out of
this foolishness.

- I really
appreciate you, baby.

Thank you.

- Thank you.

Mwah.

- I cannot imagine
Tina's happy with me.

But if I were
to give her a point,

she would be at three points,
and then she would

be that much closer to me.

I am trying to win at the end
of the day, and it is a game.

Sometimes you got to
play a little dirty.

- Oh, honey, guard is up.

Giggles done.

- I can only imagine,
Tina Burner.

- I just got knocked
out of the top three.

Now it is Mistress,
it is Jorgeous,

and it is Lydia, baby.

Fucking gremlins.

- We either both have to be
in the top next week

or we both have to be
in the bottom.

- So we could give
each other a point.

- They're little cockroaches.
I'm going to stomp on 'em.

- This is feeling
different than week one.

- Yeah, baby.

I'm just not blind.

You know what I mean?

I'm going to stomp you out.

- Titty clap.

[dramatic music]

I have a point!

[laughs]

- ♪ RuPaul's Drag Race ♪

The winner of "RuPaul's
Drag Race All Stars"

receives a one-year supply

of Anastasia Beverly Hills
cosmetics,

a coveted spot in the
"Drag Race" Hall of Fame,

and a cash prize of $200,000.

With extra-special guest judge
Adam Shankman.

♪ RuPaul's Drag Race ♪

♪ May the best
drag queen win ♪

♪ Best drag queen win ♪

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Good morning!

[laughs]

- Pressure is getting worse.

- This is our last week.

Final week, we're walking
into the Werk Room,

and I am number one
with my one point.

I'm very excited.
I'm on the board.

- Do you feel
like Kerri fucked you

by not giving you that point?

- No.
Like I said, I'm number one.

I am the one.
I'm the only one.

Y'all can all suck it.

[laughs]

I didn't make
a deal with Kerri,

so I'm not really
in my feelings about it.

I'm more in my feelings about
not getting the points from Ru.

- Nicole turned it
into a rap challenge.

It was giving.

The cactus was sickening.
- Yes, I know.

- She did.

- Listen, I gave Nicole that
point because she deserved it.

I thought we were here to
uplift each other, especially

after the week prior.

And I think Lydia just took
that chance to play the game.

And I was going to say
I didn't see it coming,

so it just made me
just change how I feel

about you in this competition.

- Well, do you think--OK.

- Wait, let me finish talking.
- Yes, ma'am.

- I don't think we
should just cut me off.

- OK.

- This is the
Tournament of Champions,

not the Tournament
of Alliances.

I want to see everyone
have a fair fight.

So it was just--
it was a personal blow.

- My intention was
not to personally

make you feel any sort of way.

I am sorry for doing that.

But, like, at the end of
the day, it is a game.

- 100%.

- I had no, like, real
strategy against you.

I'm just trying to play to my--

- It was a strategy against
me, because you didn't give me

the point, knowing
that I'd be--you'd be

two points ahead of me.

- Am I causing drama?

What's happening?

[laughs] God!

- I'm confused, though,
because y'all both told me

and Jorgeous that y'all
were going to pull

the same thing on Kerri
and Nicole.

- I did not say that.

- No, Tina did.
No, Tina did.

- Bitch, don't even try it.
Don't even try it.

- Girl, Tina did.

- If you want the real tea,
if you want the real tea,

Mistress sat in "Untucked"
and said,

you should pull
the same shit

on those girls, and I said no.

You contemplated it.

I said no.

[gasping]
- No!

- No, no, no!
Darling, don't even.

Darling, don't even.
No, no, no! Exactly.

- I have been contemplating--

- And you said maybe we should
think about it.

- Where are the receipts?

OK, so me and Jorgeous
were saying,

tonight, you'll have to do
the same thing we did to them.

If y'all leave them with
zero points, that means they

won't be able to catch up.

- I mean, that makes sense.
- Think about it.

- I need some, like, popcorn.

- I may have told
a little white lie,

which I've never done before.

Now I just sit back and watch.

It's going to drive
someone crazy.

It was Tina, literally.

- It was Tina.
- It was Tina.

- You know better than that.
- Girl.

I mean, you do seem
a little heated.

You do seem a little heated.

- Tina tried it so nasty.

- Was this the plan?

Like, was there
a plan for y'all

to pull something?
- There was a contemplation.

- Choose now.

Choose now which side you are
going to be on,

the truth side--
- Whoa.

- Or the fake side.

- Girl, there was--
it is a game.

- So you're going to
sit--you're going

to sit there and let
them lie in front of me?

- There is no
set-in-stone plan that we had.

- I'm not talking about that.

I'm talking about
this conversation.

- Ah.
[alarm rings]

- Thank you, Mother.
Right on time.

- Kerri, I would never
disrespect you like that.

- You caused chaos.

- Ooh, girl!

She done already
done had herses.

Good morning, angels.

- Good morning.
- Hi, Mother.

- Your mission,
if you choose to accept it,

is to put some funk
in your trunk...

- [laughs]
- OK.

- And report for booty duty.

- Ooh!

- Because I'm going to
get you, mothertucker.

♪ ♪

- [gasps] No!

- OK.

- Hello, hello, hello.

[all scream]

♪ ♪

- You're so stupid.

[laughter]

Good morning, All Stars.

all: Good morning.

- You know, when I
was a baby drag queen,

I was inspired by movies
like "Shaft," "Foxy Brown,"

and "Cleopatra Jones" to create
a low-budget dragsploitation

movie called "Starrbooty."

♪ ♪

Now, over the years,
I've made several many sequels.

[laughs] And now it's time
for the next chapter.

For this week's Tournament
of All Stars Maxi Challenge,

you'll be starring with me
in the movie Rusical

"Starrbooty: the Rebooty."

- Oh, my God!

- Yes!

- Set in 2025,
I'll be reprising

my role as the timeless
superfly superspy Starrbooty.

- Yes!

- And you'll be introducing
these new characters,

our heroes, the Booty Squad--

Coffee, Tea, and Mimi--

and the evil agents of PUSS,

the Powerful Underground
Sister Syndicate--

Foxy, Moxy, and Pam.

- Yes!

- I'll leave it up to you
to cast the roles.

Now, remember, this is
the last week of your bracket.

And yes, there's still a path
to the semifinals for each

and every one of you.

So don't hold nothing back.

All Stars,
start your engines,

and may
the best drag queen win.

- Yes!
- Yes!

- [laughs]

- [laughs]

- Yes, ma'am.

- Oh, my Lord.

- Are we going to do
this fair, ladies?

- Well, it's the last week,
so one would hope so, right?

- Yes, of course.

- Oh, yes.
- Yes.

- For this week's
Maxi Challenge,

we will be starring
in the movie Rusical

"Starrbooty: the Rebooty."

- We get to
collaborate with Ru,

so we got to
really turn it out.

- It's going to be amazing.

- Not only are we carrying
on the "Starrbooty" legacy.

We are literally starring
along the original

star of "Starrbooty."

Put that on my fucking
IMDb page, girl.

- The Booty Squad
is Miss Coffee,

she's the brains
of the operation.

Tea, she's the brawn
of the operation.

And Mimi, she's the
beauty of the operation.

- OK.

- With it being the
last week, my game plan

is, put all the girls who
are the fool together.

Kerri, Nicole, and Tina
have to be in a group.

Because when you mix all
those ingredients together,

it's definitely going to
be a recipe for disaster.

- And then next is
the agents of PUSS.

Foxy, she's the
villainous head of PUSS.

Moxy, she's the assassin.

And Pam, she's the sadist
who loves to bring the pain.

- Lydia, Jorgeous,
and I need to be

the villainous agents of PUSS.

I am the head villain in
charge in this competition,

and it will be
a sickening team.

Well, I think I'm going
to be Foxy for sure.

I think that fits right
in for my little--

- OK, should I write this down?

- Oh.
- I definitely want to be Pam.

- I definitely want to be Foxy.
- I love Pam for you.

- You have to bring the pain.

That means you're going to
be flipping and twirling

and dipping and--
yeah, yeah, yeah.

- Girl, I'm feeling Moxy,
so that works out perfect.

- So--OK, really,
so all three of us?

So we decided we're going
to be the agents of PUSS.

- Yeah.
- Oh.

Wait a damn minute.

I kind of am feeling Moxy.
Not going to lie.

- OK.

Mimi, I feel like Mimi,
the beauty of the operation--

I mean, come on.

- I agree, I agree.

- Does anybody else want Mimi?

- Mistress is 100%
trying to take

charge of assigning the roles.

But also, I'm here
to play a game.

And if me leaning into it is
going to make Mistress less

competitive, it just
opens up more space

for me to be focused
on really annihilating

this week's challenge.

- I'm fine with being Tea.

- Nicole, you
could do all that?

- It's so out of my character.

Me being Butch and stuff
like that would be hilarious.

But I don't have
no butch body drag.

- OK, let's put
Tina in that role.

- OK.

[laughter]

- Oh, my God,
you're such a monster.

[laughter]

All right, baby, I'll do Tea.

- So now I'm Coffee?

- Sure, you be the brains,
baby.

- Did you highlight
Coffee on that one?

- Yeah, here.
Take this.

- Yes.
- Wow.

I assigned the roles
just how I wanted them.

I literally have
the mind of a mastermind,

and it's, like,
really concerning.

[laughs evilly]

- Villainous.

[laughter]

- How do you feel about
being the heroes and not

the villains?
- I mean, what do you think?

- I think it's appropriate.

- World domination
will be ours!

[laughs evilly]

- Are there mind games
going on today?

I don't know.

- I mean, there's already
mind games from the start.

It's a competition.
You know what I mean?

I don't think that's
ever going to end.

So all I'm happy about is
that they are the villains,

because they are the villains.
- It's appropriate.

- I feel like this
is villainous.

I don't know.
- That's so villainous.

- She's villainy.

And, you know.

- Sister.

That's perfect!

- I feel like
it's assassin-like.

That's why I was thinking Moxy.

We're all villains, and I feel
really excited about that.

My last Rusical,
I had to play an animal,

and I had to be
goofy and weird.

- ♪ I found a friend who ♪

- ♪ Understood ♪

- So now I'm really excited
that I just get to be...

pew, pew, pew, pew!

[spy music]

Yeah.

[laughs]

- Hey, baby.

You lonely tonight?
- Oh, shit, hold up.

You ahead of me.

- Oh, you are clocked in.

- Hey, baby!

The PUSS squad has
kidnapped RuPaul,

and we are going to save her.

Kind of Charlie's Angels-esque,
you know,

undercover prostitution whores.

You l-l-l-l-l-lonely tonight?

You're next, Tea.
Are we not doing this?

Are we not rehearsing?

- No, no, I was letting
you get some options out.

- I don't know if it
was possible to rehearse

with all of that.

- I haven't done
a Rusical yet,

but I know
that I can sell Coffee.

A loud, obnoxious
hooker on the corner--

I mean, sounds like me.

[laughs]

This bitch's pussy
turns into sunshine when

you throw it into the air.

Am I allowed to ad-lib?

And even though I am not a
dancer, I'm so underestimated.

All I got to do is, like,
not fall off the stage

and I could be
in the top this week.

Do what you need to do.

I'm going to do
what I need to do.

I'll get their attention
and you trick 'em.

[laughs]
- I'm going to trick 'em, baby.

- You know, I already see
the other group crumbling.

They're going at it.

- Girl, literally.

- Here's the tea.
- Yeah.

- What happened has happened
in these last couple weeks.

I don't like what's
going on, but I think

I put my guard
down a little bit.

Now my guard is up,
and I'm ready to fight.

It's the last challenge,
so I'm just

going to fight tooth
and nail to show

these people what I got.
- Facts are facts.

- Facts are facts.

[tense music]

- [laughs]

- [laughs]

[upbeat music]

- [sighs]

All right,
all right, all right.

- Hello. Hello.

- Hello.
- Hi, Leland.

- Hey.
- Oh, my goodness.

- It's time for the vocal
recording session with Leland,

and honestly, I am so excited.

- I'm Leland, your composer,
and this is Gabe, producer.

- Hi.

- We are so excited to dive in

and do
"Starrbooty: the Rebooty."

- Yes.
- Yes, we're excited.

- I was part of
"Wigloose: The Rusical!"

on season 15, and honestly,
I feel like that was yet

another win I was robbed of.

So I'm excited
to outdo myself,

because I know I can act.

I feel like I'm
a really great performer.

I check every box.

- Testes.

- [laughs] How do you feel
going into this?

- I'm excited.
I mean, I don't sing.

I mean, the first time
I did anything like this

was last week when
we did the rap challenge,

and I think I did really well.

- In this moment,
you are a pop star.

- OK. You got the autotune
over there, right?

- [laughs]

- 1, 2, 3, 4.

- ♪ They call me Coffee ♪

♪ And all the bad boys
want their shot ♪

- I would go...

♪ And all the bad boys
want their shot ♪

- ♪ All the bad boys
want their shot ♪

- I feel like the one
note I'm not going

to have to give you is higher.
- OK, yeah.

- 'Cause you're going there
on your own.

You're going there on your own.

- All right, Mariah.

- Bitch, am I Whitney Houston
and Eminem?

Boom, kapow!

[moans]

- You killed it.

- I believe you--
I mean thank you.

- You are playing Tea.
- Yeah.

- The brawns of the operation,
the brute strength.

And I see it.
- Baby, I was born this way.

I'm the linebacker in a dress,
honey.

I'm the one
who brings the heat.

It's kind of who I am.
- Yes.

- ♪ Tea's the name ♪

♪ Brute force is my game ♪

♪ I got the brawn ♪

♪ Bitch, I bring the pain ♪

- The character is there.

That's really great.

- The last time
I did a Rusical, baby,

they put me in the bottom.

- You stopped lip-syncing
before you died.

It was unlike you.

- But, baby,
theater is my life.

So, like, this challenge
is a great opportunity

for me to get the points
I need for the semifinals.

- ♪ I'll dazzle you blind ♪

♪ Love at first sight ♪

♪ Beauty and danger ♪

♪ And a whole lot of fight ♪

- Great.

I would think about if there's
a way to insert a little bit

of comedy into this.

- I think I can pull
something monstrous out.

- OK.

- Being funny is not my comfort
zone when it comes to music,

but this is the last
opportunity to make it

on to the next round.

So safe is out of the window.

Gotta bring the...
[clears throat]

Feminine top out of me.

- There it is.

- ♪ Beauty and danger ♪

♪ And a whole lot of fight ♪

- I feel like I just saw
the character come to life.

- There she was, huh?
- There she is.

- [laughs]

- Wham, bam, hey, Miss Pam.

- Hello, Leland.

- What do you know about Pam?

- All I know is she's a
nasty bitch who's so seducing

and just, you know,
just disgusting.

I won the All Stars 9 Rusical
by being

a fully realized character.

I need to make sure
that I do that again.

Because if I'm
in the top this week,

I finalize my spot
for the next round.

My name is Pam,
and pain is my pleasure.

- OK, great, but can you give
me a little bit of an upper

register of--my name's Pam.

- My name's Pam.

- To me, that's really nice.

- Is that my mom?

Mother?

- My name is Pam,
and pain is my pleasure.

Torture and torment
beyond all measure.

- Yes, yes.

- OK, who am I?

Oh!

- Come on, Pam.

- [slurps, clicks tongue]

- ♪ Mess with me ♪

♪ You'll meet your maker ♪

♪ I'm the real deal,
genuine, no faker ♪

- Swag.

- I just want you
to take it past the point

of where you feel a little,
like, out of your comfort zone.

- OK.

♪ Moxy,
you're the killer queen ♪

- To me, that tone
felt really right.

I think you tapped into it.

- OK.

- ♪ Foxy's the name ♪

♪ The mastermind of crime ♪

- Everybody, go to sleep.

- ♪ I got the plans
to make the world submit ♪

♪ Try to lick me,
you'll taste defeat ♪

♪ Hmm, that's it ♪

- Why is she
boring me to death?

I'm over here yawning
the house down.

Girl, I cannot stop yawning.

I had already told myself
no matter what she did,

I was just going
to fall asleep.

I'm just terrorizing her.

- I would just give
a little bit more volume.

- ♪ Got the plans
I'm sorry.

Can you start me off
a little bit earlier?

- Yeah.

- Wake me up when she's done.

- ♪ Oh, that's it ♪

- How did you feel
about that one?

- I felt all of them were good.

[laughter]

- OK.

Yeah. Sure.

- Ooh!

- Leland seems
to agree with me.

I'm in my sabotage era.

[laughs]

- Let's try it again.

[tense music]

[upbeat music]

- Just so we're clear,
there's actually

a lot of dancing in this.

Like, this is like,
everybody's dancing

and everybody has equal parts.

This is part of RuPaul's
"Starrbooty" legacy,

and we have to deliver.

OK, here we go.

1, 2, 3, and 4.

- This is my first time
working with Adam,

and honestly, I'm really
excited to be working with him,

because I'm that girl
when it comes to choreo.

Y'all know this.
Y'all know this.

- Here we go.

Down, ba, ba, ba.

Ee, ee!

Ball change, hit, bam.

Open, hit, hit.
Great.

- Yes.
- Go out.

- She's got it.
- Yeah.

- Yeah.

- I feel like this
challenge is mine.

- 5, 6, 7, whip.

Muscles, gotta be nice.

Can't lick the puss.

No, no, no.

- I got it, I got it, I got it.

Adam is giving us full-on
dancer choreography.

- Ba, ba, ball change.

Hit--you really hate that
ball change, don't you?

- He's a little bit
intimidating when he's

giving you all the pointers.

- Together, open.

- And then down.
- No, no, no. Ha!

- You want my pussy
open or closed?

- Closed.
- [laughs]

- Mistress looks like she
is a little uncomfortable.

- You're just kind of
moving through everything.

We'll have to work on getting
you into these positions

in a more aggressive way.

- Yeah, let me go 100%.

It's because I like to take
my choreo,

like, a little, like, slowly.

- I understand.
We'll keep it real.

- Yeah, let me go 100%.
- Here we go.

Can't lick the puss, ba, ba.

Uh, uh.

Da. Hit, hit, muscle.

- I can boogie, but I
am not a dancing queen.

- 7, uh, uh, uh, uh--

- Ooh.

- Uh, uh.
- Are you there?

- I don't know.
I'm figuring it out.

- Lydia is sort of
questioning all of her moves.

Hit, hit. Down.
- Oh.

- So I need to get her
to give over to this

"I'm a villain" energy.

Because if she's
questioning herself,

it won't go well for her.

So you are whores.

- On the weekends.
- Right.

- Yeah.
- Prostitutes.

- So this number
for you guys is

all about giving
a lot of hooker,

badass,
Charlie's Angels energy.

OK?

5, 6, and 7, 8.

We are living.

Here we go.

And 5, 6, and 7, and 8.

All right, that's good.

Kerri Colby is a great mover.

She's giving that super
empowered femininity.

3, 4, 5, 6.

- OK, Tina.

- You're really
stomping right now.

It's feeling a little NFL.

- Oh, my God.

- But Tina Burner is not
exactly giving full woman.

- She's the burly one.

- Yeah.

- The character, the character.

- It's like Shrek, you know?
- [laughs]

- When we're doing
synchronized dancing,

I just want to make sure
that they all really look

good together.

Let me see you just
keep doing this.

Uh, uh, uh.

[laughter]

What's the struggle bus, babe?

So step on your right leg.

- Leg.

- Panic, panic, panic.
- I'm gonna do it.

No, I'm fine.

This is my relaxed face.
[laughs]

- That's it? Oh, work.

- Love her to death, but Nicole
is fucking up my gig.

- This is the first slap.
This way, right?

- You're just literally--
it's just right, left, right,

left, right, left, walking.

- Like, how much more
simpler can simple get?

- 1, 2, 3...

- Oy-yi-yi.
- 4.

And then I'm like--

- No, that's where--
that's where the problem is.

- That's the problem, isn't it?
- Yeah.

- My God, Kerri, Nicole,
and Tina are a complete mess.

I see my plan is working
exactly as I needed it to.

[laughs]

- Uh, uh.

- I'm dancing.

- We're going to have to
work on it and get it.

We got to move on.

We got--OK.

[tense music]

[upbeat music]

- I'm number one!

- Oh, my God, the last day!

- Oh, my gosh.

- Last chance, ladies.
- Girl.

- We are going to the final
performance of the bracket.

And, girl,
I'm feeling so confident

going into this performance,
because I practiced

my ass off for this number.

- Oh!

- I'm sick of these hos.

- You think we're going to
make some money tonight?

- Of course.
- I would like to make 10,000.

- I am.

- I would like to
make 10,000, honey.

- I want to get a good
client with a $10,000 tip.

- As a whole, I am
nervous for our team,

but I am confident
with my choreography.

And this is my last time
to earn some points,

so I gotta make sure I shine.

Baby, all bets are off.

I am bringing it to the stage.

- Lydia, who do you think is
the weakest from our group?

- We don't have
a weak link, baby.

- You're supposed
to be being honest.

- I am being honest.
[laughter]

- You don't have to lie
because you're afraid of her.

- [laughs]

The choreo was very
hard for me to pick up,

but now that I've had
some time to practice,

I'm ready to bring the PUSS.

- Can everyone say--

OK, let's--let's all say,
if we're in the bottom,

who we would consider
giving our point to.

- No matter what,
you and Jorgeous are giving

your points away first, so.
- Yeah.

- That's that shit
I'm talking about.

Girl, we gotta win.
- You gotta win out.

- Because they're at us.
- OK.

- I'm done.
I'm over it.

- Look at her, look at her.

She's smiling, she's smiling.

- I'm smiling because it's
just the gaslight of it all.

Like, we all know Mistress.

We all know what she does.
- See?

- And we all know
Jorgeous, and we've

seen how they play the game.
- Y'all bitches don't know me.

Y'all don't know me.

- We all know that
I was the one--

you know, I was the one
sitting there.

Let's sew that dress.
Let's do that.

I'm not here to sell
my girls under the bus.

- When it skips like that
on, like, stretched fabric

like this, what is the tea?

- Let me see it.

- But that's why
you were sewing

the dress, because
you wanted to appease

her to get her point.
- Nice try.

- Tina, don't--Tina just...
- Nice try, baby.

- Paint that mug.
- Nice try.

- Paint that mug.
Girl, paint that mug.

- You're exhausting me.
Exhausting me.

You call it MVQ points--
most valuable queen.

But the bracket
that I'm in,

it's MVA,
most valuable alliance.

We are back in high school
with bratty little bitches

stirring up some shit.

And that's OK, honey,
because I'm a grown-ass man,

and I'm going to play fair.

Because I want to leave
this competition

with my head held high.

- Let me be the first
to just tell everyone,

playing fair 100% of the time
does not get you shit.

All the girls who are
in positions of power

be fucking people over.

Yes, ma'am.
That's just the tea.

- Girl, 'cause right now--

right now, if we would
have split it evenly,

we'll be fucking
going through it.

Some of these
girls are taking

this competition so personally,
and it's not that serious.

Have you seen "All Stars"?
[laughs]

Mama Ru puts
a game in front of me,

bitch, I'm doing
anything to win that

$200,000 and that crown, OK?

- I'll be honest and say
that y'all are being messy.

I don't think I've ever
been that gagged before.

- And neither one of them
have given you a point, right?

- They are supposed
to give me points,

but they were in the top,
so I'm still giving them

the opportunity to do their big
one and be women of their word.

- Got you, we got you.

If I do not win
tonight, I think

my only hope for
getting a point is going

to be dependent on Kerri.

Kerri, what are you going
to do with your point?

- You know what?

I would consider giving
a point to anyone in the moment

when they need it,
and you're not off the table.

- Aw.
- Aw.

- That's sweet.

- I love Kerri.

- Yes, I love Kerri too.

- It feels kind of silly,
because I kind of

did fuck her over
the first week,

but I really meant it.

If I had a point
to give to her,

I would give her
the point, because I

would obviously make right on
what I said and what I did.

I feel like Texas queens
are always supreme.

Like, Texas girls always
just wear the outfit.

- We're a different
kind of breed.

- Is that, like, inbred?

[laughter]

- Oh, my God!

- [laughs]

- [laughs]

[upbeat music]

♪ Cover girl, put the bass
in your walk ♪

♪ ♪

♪ Walk ♪

♪ Cover girl, put the bass
in your walk ♪

♪ Head to toe ♪

♪ Let your whole body talk ♪

♪ Cover girl ♪

♪ And what ♪

Welcome to the main
stage of "RuPaul's Drag Race"

Tournament of All Stars.

She's sitting
on a secret agent--

Michelle Visage.

Now, Michelle,
do you have a spy name?

- Ooh, they call me Mr. Tits.

[laughter]

- All right, Ms. Areola Jones.

- [laughs]

- And my undercover brother,
Carson Kressley.

Carson, do you have a spy name?

- Well, I was going to use
Lydia Butthole Kollins,

but apparently, that's taken.

So now it's just Brown Eye,

as in Brown Eye
for the Straight Guy.

[laughter]

- From the bowels of the
Pentagon, Adam Shankman.

- My code name
is Dick, Dick Fister,

but that's Mr. Fister
if you're nasty.

- My goodness!

Where are you people from?

- The bowels of the Pentagon,
apparently

- Yes, clearly.

This week, we challenged
our queens to sing

and dance
their padded asses off

in "Starrbooty: the Rebooty."

All Stars,
start your engines,

and may
the best drag queen win.

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

- Supermodel and
secret agent Starrbooty

is working undercover
at the club to bust

the evil agents of PUSS.

♪ ♪

- ♪ Starrbooty, booty, booty ♪

♪ That's who I am ♪

♪ Starrbooty, booty, booty ♪

♪ Now, go tell that
to the man ♪

♪ What you don't know
can't hurt you, Slick ♪

♪ What I do know is don't mess
with these filthy tricks ♪

♪ I'm taking my time
to do it right ♪

♪ Taking my time
to win this fight ♪

♪ Bang, boom, pow ♪

♪ 6' 7", no pinches ♪

♪ I paid all of my dues
in the trenches ♪

♪ Blow you away, no problem ♪

♪ That's what I say ♪

♪ That's how I know
when I got 'em ♪

♪ Bang, boom, pow ♪

♪ She can take you
tit for tat ♪

♪ But that ain't
where her head is at ♪

♪ Starrbooty, booty, booty ♪

♪ That's who I am ♪

♪ Starrbooty, booty, booty ♪

♪ Now, go tell that
to the man ♪

♪ She can take you
tit for tat ♪

♪ But that ain't
where her head is at ♪

♪ Starrbooty ♪

- Holy hairspray!

Starrbooty's been kidnapped!

♪ ♪

Meanwhile, Starrbooty's
Booty Squad is working

undercover as prostitutes.

- Hey, baby.

Are you lonely tonight?

- You want some company?

- I'm your favorite hooker's
favorite hooker.

all: So what are you
in the mood for?

- Coffee?

- Tea?

- Or Mimi?

♪ ♪

all:
♪ Midnight booty call ♪

♪ We're here
to save the day, oh ♪

♪ Midnight booty call ♪

♪ We're kickin' ass
and taking names ♪

- ♪ They call me Coffee ♪

♪ 'Cause I like it
black and hot ♪

- ♪ Hot, hot, hot ♪

- ♪ I'm bold and strong ♪

♪ And all the bad boys
want their shot ♪

- ♪ Shot, shot, shot ♪

all:
♪ Midnight booty call ♪

- ♪ Tea's the name ♪

♪ Brute force is my game ♪

♪ I got the brawn ♪

♪ Bitch, I bring the pain ♪

♪ Catwalk strut
turned roundhouse kick ♪

♪ Mess with me,
and you'll go down quick ♪

- ♪ Midnight booty ♪

♪ 1-800-BOOTY ♪

♪ Midnight booty ♪

♪ I need some booty quick ♪

all:
♪ Midnight booty call ♪

♪ We're here
to save the day, oh ♪

♪ Midnight booty call ♪

♪ We're kicking ass
and taking names ♪

- ♪ Mimi here
with a face that charms ♪

♪ Mug so lethal,
it's ringing the alarms ♪

♪ I'll dazzle you blind ♪

♪ Love at first sight ♪

♪ Beauty and danger ♪

♪ And a whole lot of fight ♪

all:
♪ Midnight booty call ♪

- Ooh, girl,
you got a booty call!

- Booty Squad,
I've been kidnapped

by the agents of PUSS.

They're demanding
a sickening supply

of Anastasia Beverly Hills
cosmetics,

plus a grand ransom
of $200 million.

Pay up, or I'm kaput.

♪ ♪

- Something's not right here.

- Wait a minute.

Zoom in on them hands!

- She's tapping out a code!

- What's she saying?

- Two pieces and a biscuit,
sweet tea,

and a side
of curly fries?

- But that's her
lunch order at...

all:
Chaka Khan Chicken Shack!

- She's being
held captive there!

- Hurry!

We've got to rescue her
before it's too late!

- But do we have time
for one more chorus?

- Honey, always!

all:
♪ Midnight booty call ♪

♪ We're kicking ass
and taking names ♪

♪ Starrbooty,
we're on the way ♪

♪ ♪

- Meanwhile, the agents
of PUSS have Starrbooty

under lock and key
in the basement

of the Chaka Khan
Chicken Shack.

- You better let me out.

Let me out, suckers!

You better open up this box.

- Now that we've
captured Starrbooty,

world domination will be ours!

[laughs evilly]

- You'll never get
away with this!

- Zip it!

You DICs know too much!

- Um, we prefer to be
called by our full name...

- Dangerous Instigators
of Chaos.

- Shut up, DIC!

First, we get the money,
then you and Starrbooty

are up for elimination!

all: We are the agents
of PUSS,

Powerful Underground
Sister Syndicate.

And, baby, you can't
lick the PUSS.

♪ Can't lick the PUSS ♪

♪ We're too damn strong ♪

♪ Try to beat us ♪

♪ You'll find you're wrong ♪

- ♪ Foxy's the name,
the mastermind of crime ♪

♪ I got PUSS operations
running smooth and on time ♪

- ♪ Can't lick the PUSS ♪

- ♪ I got the plans
to make the world submit ♪

♪ Try to lick me,
you'll taste defeat ♪

♪ Ah, that's it ♪

♪ ♪

all:
♪ Can't lick the PUSS ♪

- ♪ Moxy here,
I'm a killer queen ♪

♪ My touch is deadly,
my methods unseen ♪

- ♪ Can't lick the PUSS ♪

- ♪ Mess with me,
you'll meet your maker ♪

♪ Gack, gack, gack, gack,
gack, gack, gack, gack ♪

♪ I'm the real deal,
genuine no faker ♪

♪ Oh
all: ♪ Can't lick the PUSS ♪

♪ We're too damn strong ♪

♪ Try to beat us ♪

♪ You'll find you're wrong ♪

- ♪ My name is Pam ♪

♪ And pain is my pleasure ♪

♪ Torture and torment
beyond all measure ♪

♪ I'll make you squirm
and beg for that release ♪

♪ When it comes
to dishing hurt ♪

♪ My wonders never cease ♪

all:
♪ Can't lick the PUSS ♪

♪ We're too damn strong ♪

♪ Try to beat us ♪

♪ You'll find you're wrong ♪

♪ PUSS is tight, baby ♪

♪ PUSS is slick ♪

♪ Try to lick this PUSS ♪

♪ But, sucker,
we're too quick ♪

♪ You can't lick the PUSS ♪

♪ Licky-licky, mothertucker ♪

♪ You can't lick the PUSS ♪

♪ Licky-licky, mothertucker ♪

♪ Can't lick the PUSS ♪

♪ ♪

- Well, if it isn't
the agents of PUSS.

Let's get 'em, ladies!

all: ♪ Slap it, whack it ♪

♪ Boom, kick, pow ♪

♪ Dance fight, ha ♪

♪ ♪

♪ Watch this ♪

♪ ♪

♪ Oh ♪

♪ ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh ♪

♪ ♪

♪ Oh ♪

♪ Slap it, whack it,
boom, kick, pow ♪

♪ Round two ♪

♪ ♪

♪ Watch this ♪

♪ ♪

♪ Oh ♪

♪ ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh ♪

♪ ♪

♪ Whoo ♪

♪ Slap it, whack it,
boom, kick, pow ♪

♪ Hold tight ♪

[siren wailing]

She's gone!

- Surprise, surprise!

I was never in danger.

I just needed you
to see that when

Booty, PUSS, and DIC
work together, ooh,

there ain't nothing
we can't do.

Good job, mothertuckers.

Starrbooty out.

- You know,
Starrbooty is right.

We shouldn't fight
amongst ourselves.

- The true forces
of evil are the ones

that try to separate us.

- I think there's one
thing Booty, PUSS,

and DIC can all agree on.

all:
Any hole is a goal.

♪ ♪

- ♪ Starrbooty, booty, booty ♪

♪ That's who I am ♪

♪ Starrbooty, booty, booty ♪

♪ Now, go tell that
to the man ♪

♪ Booty, booty ♪

♪ ♪

♪ 'Cause you're a star, baby ♪

Category is Wild, Wild West.

Up first, Nicole Paige Brooks.

It's Nicole Thee Stallion.

- [laughs]

- This look is
Nicole Paige Brooks

as a carnival ride.

- Save a horse,
ride a drag queen.

- I am wearing
my Pink Pony-inspired,

slash
RuPaul Met Gala illusion.

You want a ride?

Hop on.
Giddyup!

- Look at the rump
on that filly.

- Yeah, well, I hear
she's looking

for a stable relationship.

[laughter]

♪ 'Cause you're a star, baby ♪

Up next, Tina Burner.

Yee-whore!

- That's putting
a hat on a hat.

- Mm-hmm.

- Yee-haw!

I am serving vintage
Wonder Woman if she

went to the Wild, Wild West.

- This really roped me in.

- Mm-hmm.
- Uh-huh.

- I know if you look closely,
baby, you could see the stars,

the ropes wrapped around my
body like I've been lassoed.

And it is art.

- Leather mommy.

- I got my dark hair on,
and I love people to see

this different side of me.

- That gave me wood.

- [laughs]

From the great state
of Texas, Kerri Colby.

- I don't know if that top
can Texas hold 'em.

[laughter]

- This look is
my interpretation

of being completely dripping
and soaking wet

but also dry.

I'm owning my Texas heritage
and my history,

and I look fucking stunning.

- Remember the Alamo,
she better don't.

♪ 'Cause you're
a star, baby ♪

Up next, from
the great state of Texas,

Mistress Isabelle Brooks.

Fire in the hole.

- Which hole?

- All of them.

- I need to show Tina Burner
how to actually

turn it and burn it.

This is how you
wear flames, honey.

- She is such a flamer.

- This just encapsulates
everything that Mistress is--

over the top.

It's a little bit campy.

It looks sickening.

It's shiny, and I'm giving you
high Texas glam, honey.

- She's got reservations
at the Breast Western.

[laughter]

Up next,
Lydia Butthole Kollins.

- And I've got
a real beef with this.

- Yeah.
- Do you?

- Evening, ma'am.

And welcome to my saloon.

- The boys call her Longhorn.

- Yeah.

- I have these cartoonishly
wide cowskin chaps.

I have a longhorn-inspired
hat on with tons of chains

and fringe and frills.

♪ ♪

- Oh!

- There's ropes.
There's a lasso.

- OK, Corral.

Come on.

- The only thing
missing from my look

is Bugs Bunny and Road Runner
running around.

- Well, apparently,
she's from Oklahomo.

[laughter]
- Yes!

- Up next from
the great state of Texas,

Jorgeous.

- Ooh!

- Come on, Miss Kitty!
- Yes!

- Meow!

- Girl, I wanted
to give saloon girl down.

I wanted to give head bitch
of the Gapey Saloon, bitch.

I want to be
the head bitch in charge.

You know?

With all these hos
and prostitutes in my saloon.

You know what I mean?

- You heard of Starrbooty?
- Uh-huh.

- That's Starrtitty.

- Oh. [laughs]

- Starrbooty's cousin.

- Once removed.

- Yeah.

[laughs]

- [laughs]

Welcome, queens.

Tournament of All Star
rules are in full effect.

Now, tonight I'll name the
top two All Stars of the week,

and they will receive
two points each.

Then the top two will lip sync
for their chance to win

$10,000 and one extra point.

Now, remember, this is
the last week of this bracket.

Tonight the top three queens
with the most points will

continue on to our Tournament
of All Stars semifinals

and the chance to win $200,000.

in the final Lip Sync Smackdown
for the Crown.

Now it's time
for the judges' critiques.

First up, Nicole Paige Brooks.

- Nicole, I've never
seen anything like this

ever in my entire life.

You literally did everything
opposite of right.

[laughter]

And I think that that
needs some rewarding...

- I do too.

- Because that
is extraordinary.

- There is a rhythm, and you
did not find the rhythm.

- If that's not
your strong suit,

you have to figure out
ways where you can distract

the viewer and razzle-dazzle us
and look confident and sell it.

That's showbiz.

This look--I mean, this
is a home run for me.

It's clever.
It's chic.

It's very campy, very drag.

I love every stitch of it.

- Oh, thank you.

- Up next, Tina Burner.

- This look is fantastic.

I love how sculptural it is.

It looks like it could
be some kind of runway

piece from, like, Moschino.

I'm living for it.

- In the Rusical, you stomped.
You ate.

You did everything
that was asked of you.

And you were adding
to the scene

in a way that wasn't
taking away from your sisters.

- You hit everything that
you were supposed to hit.

But for some reason,
I kept losing you, Tina,

because some people
stood out more.

But it was fantastic
work that you do.

- Up next, Kerri Colby.

- That hat--it's like
a modern art piece to me.

Mama, those, like,
dangly little chains coming

off of there and the jewels--
so great.

- I'm a little bit nitpicky,
but, you know,

this is an All Stars thing.

The shape of the hat
just comes across

as a little square
across the top line,

but overall, it's really
beautiful, ethereal.

- Judging by
watching you, I don't

think you're the choreo queen,

but it was so smart,
what you did,

because you were literally
stealing the show.

You couldn't not watch you.

Your recording of your
voice was hysterical.

- I'm your favorite hooker's
favorite hooker.

- It was so articulated.

Just--it was fantastic.

I could see you doing
voice-overs for animated stuff.

- Thank you.
- It was really, really good.

Up next,
Mistress Isabelle Brooks.

- In the performance,

you attacked it hard,
and I love when you do that.

I love that hairy costume
situation you had.

It looked beautiful

with the hair that you had
on your head.

My one point that I
wanted to bring to you--

I don't know if it was
because of the costume,

but you kind of didn't extend
enough on the movements,

and it made it look like you
were not giving it your all.

- I love this hat.

I love how it's detailed
underneath the brim.

I love the shape of it.

I think it's so smart
how there's

a lot of curves going on here,
and that really works.

- Thank you.

- Up next,
Lydia Butthole Kollins.

- Evening, ma'am.

[laughter]

- This is fantastic.

I absolutely love this.

It's quirky like you are.

Did you make it?
- Yes, I did.

- Yeah.
- It's so cool.

The rope detail down
the pant leg--all of those

are fantastic.

- It is so rotten and wrong.

- It's so weird.

- I just--I love it. I love it.

- You had some of the more
difficult choreo--

walking across the chairs,
doing the lift,

all those things.

You definitely nailed
the technicality of it.

- I could see, as I was
giving you material,

you had this, oh, God,
look in your eyes.

And then you never said no.

You just went for it.

I loved your acting.

I thought that this was
a great night for you.

- Up next, Jorgeous.

- You had this little side
mouth thing that you did.

Yes!

You went,
first we get the money,

and then--
it just made me laugh.

Jorgeous, it was just
spectacular watching you do it.

- This tonight

was an all-stars
All Star performance.

- Thank you.

- You are just
an amazing performer.

You could go straight
to Broadway, honestly.

- Thank you so much.

- This outfit, is this
a silhouette I've seen before?

Yes.

To me, it's a little more
Pink Pony Club than OK Corral.

- I think it's very smart.

I think you didn't
do Western wear,

but you chose
a Western character.

You're that saloon girl.

It fits your brand.

And you stand out
because you did Western

but with a little bit
of a different lens.

- Mm-hmm.
- All right.

Thank you, All Stars.

I think we've heard enough.

While you untuck backstage,

the judges and I
will deliberate.

And one last detail--

this week's bottom four queens
must give away their MVQ points

on the main stage immediately
following the final lip sync.

You may leave the stage.

- Thank y'all.

[engine turning over]

- OK, just between
us squirrel friends,

what do you think?

Now, we're looking for the
top two All Stars of the week.

- Nicole Paige Brooks--
bless her heart.

Choreography is not
her strong suit,

and I think what you need
to do in that case is, like,

figure out something else.

She just needed to sell it.

- But I enjoyed
her little solo moment,

because she felt in control,
so I actually liked it.

- Tina Burner--
the fashion look,

I thought it was chic.

It was sophisticated.

- Yeah, that outfit
was gorgeous,

my favorite of the evening.

- For me, Tina was
the MVP of that group.

- Listen, she did everything
she was supposed to do,

and yet Kerri outshone her.

- Kerri did something
that Nicole Paige Brooks

should have done.

She made it her own, and it
was fascinating to watch.

- What I love about
Mistress Isabelle Brooks

is that she takes charge.

She came out,
and she donkey-punched us

into submission.
- Mm-hmm.

In fact, I didn't mind
that her arms didn't extend

as far as they could have.

I was really focused on
her acting, and I was sold.

- Mm-hmm.

- It's time to talk
about Butthole.

- Everybody's talking
about Butthole, Ru.

- Everybody's talking
about Butthole.

- She did some
pretty tough choreography

that she absolutely
could not have handled

if this was her season.

- And then this runway look--
she's just wildly creative.

I thought it was very solid.

- Yeah.

- I love how Jorgeous
is taking risks.

She's putting character
into her characters now.

- It's all completely
effortless.

The runway--she was
giving, like, 1880s

Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders.
- Yes!

- I think
the Western outfit was

a smart choice,
because it was another aspect

of the Western experience.

- She stood out.
- She stood out.

- Yeah.
- Silence.

I have made my decision.

Bring back my All Stars.

[laughs]

- [laughs]

Welcome back, All Stars.

Based on your "Starrbooty:
the Rebooty" performances

and your Wild, Wild West
runway presentations,

I've made some decisions.

[dramatic music]

The top two All Stars
of the week are...

♪ ♪

Jorgeous...

[applause]

And Lydia Butthole Kollins.

- Holy shit!

- Oh, my God.

- Condragulations.

You've each earned two points.

The rest of you can step
to the back of the stage.

♪ ♪

- Jorgeous and Butthole are
moving on to the semifinals,

but there's still
a chance for third place,

so I've got to figure out
what I'm doing quickly.

- We could.
- You tell me.

Mistress has been
telling Kerri she's

going to give her
her point.

So if me and Tina both
give her our points,

then we can bump
Mistress out of the top.

♪ ♪

- Jorgeous, Lydia, this week,
you were both booty-ful.

But tonight there can
only be one winner.

Two All Stars stand before me.

Ladies, this is your last
chance to impress me,

win $10,000, and earn
a coveted extra point

in the Tournament of All Stars.

♪ ♪

The time has come for you

to Lip Sync for Your Legacy.

♪ ♪

- Oh, my God!

I'm for sure
in the semifinals,

and now I need
that extra point.

Because I'm not going to
let this new bitch beat me.

Absolutely not.

Especially in a lip sync?

Mama, wrong girl.

- Good luck,
and don't fuck it up.

[upbeat country music]

- ♪ This ain't Texas ♪

♪ Ain't no hold 'em ♪

♪ So lay your cards
down, down, down, down ♪

♪ So park your Lexus ♪

♪ And throw your keys up ♪

♪ Stick around,
round, round, round, round ♪

♪ And I'll be damned if I
can't slow dance with you ♪

♪ Come pour some sugar
on me, honey too ♪

♪ It's a real-life boogie
and a real-life hoedown ♪

♪ Don't be a bitch ♪

♪ Come take it to the floor
now, whoo ♪

- [laughs]

- ♪ There's a tornado ♪

♪ In my city ♪

♪ Hit the basement ♪

♪ That shit ain't pretty ♪

♪ Rugged whiskey ♪

♪ 'Cause we survivin' ♪

♪ Off red cup kisses,
sweet redemption ♪

♪ Passing time, yeah ♪

♪ Ooh, one step to the right ♪

♪ We heading to the dive bar ♪

♪ We always thought
was nice ♪

♪ This ain't Texas ♪

♪ Ain't no hold 'em ♪

♪ So lay your cards
down, down, down, down ♪

♪ So park your Lexus ♪

♪ And throw your keys up ♪

- Come on, Jorgeous!

- ♪ Stick around,
round, round, round, round ♪

♪ And I'll be damned if I
can't slow dance with you ♪

♪ Come pour some sugar
on me, honey too ♪

♪ It's a real-life boogie
and a real-life hoedown ♪

♪ Don't be a bitch ♪

♪ Come take it
to the floor now ♪

♪ I'll be damned if I
cannot dance with you ♪

♪ Come pour some liquor
on me, honey too ♪

♪ It's a real-life boogie
and a real-life hoedown ♪

♪ Don't be a ♪

♪ Come take it
to the floor now ♪

[applause]
- Yes!

- Yes!

- Yes, girls.

- All Stars,
I've made my decision.

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

Jorgeous, condragulations.

You're a winner, baby.

- Yes, ma'am!
- Yes, sister!

- Oh, my God!

Who am I?

- You've won a cash tip
of $10,000,

and you've earned
an extra point.

- Thank you, Mother.

- Nicole, Tina, Kerri,
and Mistress,

please step forward.

♪ ♪

Bottom four All Stars,

it's time for you
to give your MVQ point

to the All Star
you believe

is the most valuable queen
of the week.

Choose wisely,
because your MVQ points

could determine which queens
advance to the semifinals.

Now, in the event of a tie,
I will choose who moves

forward to the semifinals.

The current scores are
Jorgeous with 7.5 points,

Lydia Butthole Kollins
with 6 points.

Mistress has 4.5.

Kerri Colby and Tina Burner
both have 2 points,

and Nicole Paige Brooks
has 1 point.

Queens, write down
the names of your MVQ now.

- My heart is down
in the bottom of my stomach,

because I literally
need every single girl

in the bottom to give me
their point for me

to move on to the semifinals.

- Lipsticks down.

Nicole Paige Brooks, which
queen gets your MVQ point?

- If we can bump Mistress out
of the top, I'd be very happy.

I want to give it to who I
think did the best in my group.

And that's Miss Kerri Colby.

I love you.
- I love you.

- Good luck.

- That takes Kerri
to three points.

Tina Burner, your turn.

- I believe in playing fair.

Kerri did something tonight
that I was so proud of.

And I'm happy I could
be there to uplift you,

and I will continue to do that
by giving you my point.

- That takes Kerri
to four points.

Kerri Colby,
who gets your MVQ point?

- Well, Mother,
I can't vote for myself.

So I wanted to go ahead and
right a wrong and even a score.

- It comes down
to me versus Kerri.

If she gives me a point,
I'm in the next round.

- I chose to write...

♪ ♪

Tina Burner.

- So Tina Burner
gets Kerri's point,

which brings Tina
to three points.

Mistress, who gets
your MVQ point?

♪ ♪

- Mistress pulled
a fast one on me.

So if she puts me
in the semifinals,

justice would be served.

You know, we litigate.

- So the first week,
I did something

very nasty
and out of character,

and I stole Nicole
and Kerri's point.

And I did tell Kerri I was
going to give her my point,

and I do think she did
very well this challenge.

However, I knew she was
going to be a fake bitch

and not give me her point.

♪ ♪

So I gave my point to Lydia.

- Oh.

- You're welcome, daughter.

- That takes Lydia
to seven points.

- Holy shit.

- You know what, bitch?

Yeah, I am a motherfucking
fake bitch--to you, girl.

Because, like, what the fuck?

You've been nothing
but fake this

entire fucking competition,

and you really fucking
tried me.

And I know you feel like shit
for that, you bitch.

- All Stars, all the points
for this bracket

have now been awarded,
which means,

Jorgeous,
Lydia Butthole Kollins,

and Mistress Isabelle Brooks,

you are advancing
to the semifinals.

Condragulations.

Nicole Paige Brooks,
Tina Burner, Kerri Colby,

all is not lost.

You still have a chance
to reenter the competition.

- What?

♪ ♪

- Prior to the grand finale,
each of our regular judges

will choose one eliminated
All Star to be entered

into the wild card lottery.

- What?

- Randomly, one All Star
will be selected to compete

in the final Lip Sync
Smackdown for the Crown

and the chance
to win $200,000.

- [laughs]

Work.

- Now, to our viewers,
tune in next week

as the third and final bracket
of All Stars arrive to compete.

Thank you, queens.

And remember, if you can't
love yourself,

how in the hell you going
to love somebody else?

Can I get an amen up in here?

all: Amen.

- All right,
now let the music play.

♪ You make me feel ♪

♪ Whisper in my ear ♪

- Bring on these other
semifinal bitches.

I'm ready for them
to feel my wrath.

- The next queens have no idea
what they're in for.

It's about to be stunts,
shows, and shenanigans.

- ♪ ASMR you for real ♪

- To the other queens
in the next round,

I can't wait to meet you.
[laughs]

- ♪ ASMR lover,
that is what you are ♪

- Next time on the
Tournament of All Stars...

- Presenting bracket number 3.

- I am not to be fucked with.

I am a legend.

- I came here to kick ass.

- Look out.

- For this week's Tournament
of All Stars Maxi Challenge,

you need to design
and create a bewitching

look for the main stage.

- Goose bumps.
- Yes.

- I'm sold, I'm sold.
I need to drink.

both:
The witches will see you now.

- [screaming]

- Hi, Ariana Grande!

It's the most homosexual
moment of my life.

- I feel pressure

because it's, like,
only three weeks, baby.

- We have to bring it
even harder.

- I love a challenge.

- She's going to meet you
at the parking lot right now.

- I'll remember that.
Click and save.

I'm not just a bitch.
I'm that bitch.

- Oh, honey.

- [laughs]

- ♪ You make me feel ♪

♪ Whisper in my ear ♪

♪ Whatever you have to say ♪

♪ Long as you whisper to me ♪

♪ Ay, ay, ay, ay, ay ♪

♪ ASMR lover ♪

♪ That's what you are to me ♪

♪ Ay, ay, ay, ay, ay ♪

♪ ASMR lover ♪

♪ That is what you are ♪