All language subtitles for the_rich_and_the_ruthless_s03e01

The Rick and the Ruthless brought to you
by Trigger and Tramble and the WNB

Network, delivering truth, not fluff.

We keep you clinging to a cliff while
inspiring you during commercials to keep

your laundry white and those chocolate
cakes moist.

20 years of aspirational escapism from
your own damn dirty problems.

I know you're a bit taken back by what
just happened. I mean, it was crazy and

it was scary, but... Half as scary as
what I'm about to say.

Okay, what? Have you spit it out? I
mean, stop trying to be so mysterious.

not in the mood. When we first met, you
said that stumbling blocks could be

stepping stones, and if I ever needed to
ask you anything, I could just reach

out.

Well, I'm reaching, and...

I just have one question.

Abby, spit it out. What?

Did you really never think I'd find you,
mother?

What?

That's right.

I found your diary, and I read every
last word.

season, right nose white.

Oh, God.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah, girl.

Uh -huh. We got these two dogs back
here. All right, listen. Turn the music

down. Everybody, listen up.

Listen up. Listen, listen, Linda.

Look it. Okay.

I just want to thank all y 'all from the
bottom of my trousers for keeping me

back in the game and making adult
entertainment to another level.

And Heather, you were an angel with
those devilish moves of yours.

My pleasure, Max.

With a sequel around the corner, right?

Pending.

And who would have known you were a
virgin, Ivy? I mean, this being your

performance. Guess I'm a natural.

And Max, how could I ever thank you for
this opportunity?

There are ways, there are ways, there
are ways. Okay, hold up.

All she did was deliver pizza in the
movie.

I did all the heavy lifting.

I gave you a Chinese pole climb to a
genie hang.

Abby can't do no Dutchess topped off
with a Batman.

Okay, hold on, hold on. There's enough
of me to go around, okay?

Heaven and everybody here on the movie,
you guys did a superb job of making Max

Productions a reality.

Now, listen, not a leak that I'm using
my dad's soundstage on the weekends.

And you better hope he never finds out
about it. Oh, he's not gonna find out.

He's not gonna find out at all.

Okay, lock it up. Lock it up.

Turn the music back on. Let's get this
party started.

Hey.

Richard Wilson Studios.

Al Jones speaking.

Yes, Mr. Barringer.

Everybody hide.

Joe Dad's coming back.

Get up. Get up.

Why the lights off, Al?

Veronica said to cut back on electric,
sir. Here's the package cord left.

That music you were playing was loud. It
gets lonely at night, sir.

I imagine it does.

I guess Allison worked extra hard this
week.

Yes, indeed.

Somebody here? No, like I said, you
know, it gets lonely at night.

Oh, you sly devil.

I ain't mad at you.

Just don't make it a habit. Yes, sir.
Yes, sir.

Night, Al.

Night, Mr. Padgett.

Tossed and turned all night.

Oh, that's just because of all the
excitement and preparation you and your

brother Max have been doing for the fan
club crew's destination nowhere.

If you can call what he did work.

Max and I half the time.

Oh, honey, calm yourself and have some
breakfast, okay? You don't want to

develop wrinkles before you hook Bobby
Tramble.

Where's Daddy?

In his office as usual. Where else? He
had some business last night, too.

Foreign distribution.

I told him not to accept Eli Nooner's
network offer. As usual, he used Larry

Sabinar as a black exec in charge, like
a shield.

And we need to keep an eye on Max.

Max can handle himself.

Can't help it that he's handsome and
charismatic and women flock to him like

moths to light. Some of them just get
too close and disintegrate. It's not

brother's fault.

And Ivy, too?

My mind! What's with all the policing,
honey?

Mom, I'm just trying to protect our
family company and not let any golding

riffraff in.

You know the family rule.

Don't get involved with the talent.
Except for your father.

Remember I told you how I had to
convince my parents that your dad was

Speaking of enough, baby, I am so
excited about you and Bobby as a couple.

I'm so happy, too.

Dad and I have big plans for you.

It hasn't even been six months.

So what?

Your dad proposed to me after three
months, and nine months later out popped

your brother. Then me, sort of. Yep, and
you two couldn't be more different if

you tried.

Oh, there's a reason for that. I mean,
I'm not biologically a Behringer.

Veronica! Mom, I'm sorry, I just never
know what to say when it comes to these

kind of things. I pretend like it
doesn't matter, but more and more it

Look, I don't mean to hurt yours or
Daddy's feelings, but sometimes I just

so alone.

Honey, give me your hand.

I still need to see Dr. Wagner again.
No, I hate that shrink. You were in the

past with your anger issues.

How many times do I have to tell you I
killed our family cat by accident?

You know, I knew I shouldn't have
brought this up.

No, please go on.

Go on.

Every time someone would ask you if I
was your child, you and Daddy would

say yes.

But it just felt like something was
missing, like you weren't telling me

something.

Honey, I told you everything there was
to know. Where my mother was from, where

my father was from. They were not your
family, my family, before you came into

my life.

So... So I've ordered a DNA test.

You what? Mom, this has nothing to do
with how much I love you and Daddy. Why

can't you accept that? Veronica, please.
Honey!

What happened?

What's wrong with her? She's crazy.

What, she's upset?

About the show, right?

Edith was trying to tell me how to write
myself and how to cast it, too.

I wish she'd go back to New York and
stay there.

It's not about the show, Augustus.

Veronica wants to know who her parents
are, her real parents.

What did you tell her? Nothing.

Good. We definitely don't want to open
that can of worms. But we promised that

we would tell her what she wanted to
know. We promised to tell her the truth.

Well, that was then and this is now.
But, Augustus, we promised.

Things will change, okay?

Well, that's it.

We're not talking about this anymore.

Get ready to go to the set.

Yeah, well, she ordered a DNA test.

I think you should know that.

Yes, Mother. You may get away with
murder for murdering Father's first

Angelique, by putting white oleander
flowers in her tea when you were her

personal assistant.

I tell you, I'm innocent!

Well, we'll let a jury of your peers
determine that.

Okay, that's enough of this crap. Let's
take a break.

Oh.

Have you seen Willie?

No. You know, I can't believe that salsa
with your favorite soap star hasn't

contacted me yet.

Those boobs picked Betty White over me.
I could have hooked circles around that

broad. Maeve, that was probably the
Lawrence Welch show billions of years

You know, can Kirk hurry up? I have to
finish packing.

That Puerto Rican kid is worse than
Willie with his lies. His name is Kurt,

he's Cuban.

Well, same thing.

That's ignorant.

Willie, I have a secret to tell you.

Not now, Maeve. All right.

You and Randall find a surrogate to
hatch that kid of yours yet?

No. Everyone's turned us down.

No shock there.

Oh, between the stress and this baby
food diet, my perimenopausal myths are

out of control.

You mean the sweat.

Yeah. Well, my gyno said that if I just
dab this cream on my decolletage,

that'll help control them, but it's not
helping.

Well, of course not.

Nothing could penetrate those bazooms.

You know.

I am deflecting all negative energy.

I'm saving it for the talent show and
for the fan crews.

Oh, well, I'm not going on that.

That jailhouse storyline has me
exhausted.

Maeve, all you do is lay on a cot 99 %
of the time. Well, it's when you don't

have lines that it's the hardest.

That's true, but you're all going to be
on that cruise because it's in our

contracts. Oh, all right already.

But...

I am going to pretend to be seasick most
of the time and stay in my cabin

playing Candy Crush.

I can't do my scene.

Oh, God. What now?

Someone broke into my dressing room
while I was on set and stole my dog.

Oh, you mean that little stuffed raggedy
bitch?

It's called taxidermy, Willie.

We need to let that stuff go. It just
ain't natural.

It's like me dragging around my favorite
dead Uncle Al, you know, who got high

and got shot breaking the entrance to
his own house.

Hey, it's not the same thing, Willie.

You know, I mean, just be happy that you
weren't in the dressing room. Couldn't

work. Just think of the free press he
would have got if you had been. Getting

beat up by the robbers defending your
dead dog?

You all are so unsympathetic. No, no,
listen. I know you have enough refresh.

Because I heard that you and Kirk's sex
tape went viral.

Yeah. And my family disowned me.

Oh, don't worry. We'll holiday adopt
you. You can come on by my place, you

We'll listen to some Shy Lights, some
Norman Connors, and you'll have the

tastiest chitlin' dinner you ever had in
your life.

Nasty. Just nasty.

Tasty. Delicious.

Ew!

We were talking about my dead dog.

Okay, you need to let that go, all
right? And let's put that on pause. I

go do my scenes right now. See y 'all in
a little bit.

My Aunt Marion, she gave me a puppy that
she got at Macy's

back in the day. And, well, I called it
Old Spice.

Died it green for Easter. Poor little
critter never made it.

Oh, hi, Fern.

You got fan mail for me? I do.

Couldn't pay me to be a stewardess.

Oh, we're called flight attendant now.

Ah, whatever.

Those broads whip those peanuts and
pretzels around like weapons.

Everybody's mad.

That flight I was on...

The beverage cart nearly severed my left
arm.

Oh, well, fortunately for my passengers,
I don't treat them like that.

I despise vacations.

Pretending to be happy in strange lands
with family you hate.

Well, Mr. Barringer is very much looking
forward to hiatus. He says it'll give

him time to cultivate some fresh ideas
before the Sudsy Awards.

Who cares?

I never win.

I'm going Johnny Depp today.

Hard.

Maeve, do you realize that we are the
last two Anglo -Saxons on this show?

And he doesn't count.

You've been under a rock.

I find myself commiserating with my
fellow colleagues, McBrayden and that

guy with the patch over his eye. What
was his name?

McNichols. Go on.

Berensers are putting me in the soap
opera affirmative action attic to rot.

And I'm not taking it lying down.

Maeve, are you with me?

Nope. Last protest I went on, I burned
my bra.

Haven't worn one since.

That was enough for me.

Standing by.

It pops off. Sit and...

Sit.

And action.

Surgical instruments sharpened?

As sharp as a crease in my jeans, Mr.

Bastard.

Cut! How many times do I have to tell
you, Willie?

The T is silent. It's bastard.

Oh, yeah, now I remember. Yeah, you
don't like me to call you Mr.

Bastard because I put too much emphasis
on the word turd. So you want me to just

drop the T. So instead, you want me to
say bastard. OK, and then when you get

that little vampire line, then they
start calling you Fink. But you don't

how I put emphasis. Really? That's
enough.

On Fink. Action.

Surgical instruments sharpened.

Let's get this carving started.

Put the saw down, Mr. Fink.

Hands in the air so we can see them.

What's this all about?

You'll find out soon enough, Mr. Fink,
down at the station.

Coughing? But I haven't done anything
wrong.

Tell it to the judge.

No, no, he made me do it. Yes, Mr. Bass,
uh, T is silent, T is silent, T is

silent. Erd kidnapped me, too. I swear.

Bums out of my face.

Javier, read him his rights.

Mr. Fink, you have the right to remain
silent.

It's... Get him out of here.

I haven't done anything wrong.

Ruby. Dee.

Ruby. Dee. Oh, thank God you rescued me.

They were going to harvest my organs and
sell them on the black market.

Not anymore.

Those clowns are going away for a long
time.

Man, they really jacked you up, Rudy.

I mean, I have been in this dang dungeon
for like the last three months. Cut it,

sis. This is black. My bad, my bad.
Thank you.

Are you hurt?

Only my heart.

Because I thought I'd never see you
again.

Not me.

Me, I broke down every doggone door till
I found the right one. Oh, Dee!

And there's a lot of media out there, so
we... We have to go.

No, no, no, no. I can't go out there
looking all busted like this.

If only there was some...

Tractor and Tramble, moisturizing and
sanitizing lotions so I can take care of

my ashy skin.

Dee, you think of everything.

I know what my baby likes.

That's perfect. Moving on. This is the
crap I'm talking about.

You see, I know doggone well Veronica
did not have us do that humiliating plug

just because she's dating Bobby Trample.

No shame.

None. Zero. Zip. Absolutely zero.

Still coming over later on tonight? Duh,
you know.

What? Yes.

Get you some.

All right, you're wrapped.

No, I have one more scene.

Yeah, well, no, you are not.

Emmy is beside herself since her dog
went missing.

Her dog's dead. How can he be missing?

All of Emmy's scenes have been moved to
next week.

Just making.

And on top of all of that, all of y 'all
are trying to borrow wardrobe to go to

this daggone fan cruise.

Don't y 'all make enough money so that
you can buy your own stuff? Here, just

get out of the wardrobe.

You know, I really hope Ruth Carter
remembers what a great job I did with

Jungle Fever.

And she calls me for that Black Panther
sequel.

All right. Oh, you know what? I almost
forgot. The brass, they want to see you

down in the commissary.

For what now?

Girl, I don't know. Just do what you're
told.

Thanks,

Beth.

My God.

$6 ,000?

How am I going to pay this Amex?

And why am I going through this at this
point in my career?

I smoked that BET callback.

What if I had to crash the audition and
tell him I was biracial?

I should be making 100K per episode, not
2 ,000 bucks.

And Eva Longoria.

Eva Longoria, you should have offered me
that role.

Oh, yeah?

You can't handle the competition.

Forgot you started off on soaps, too?

Hate you.

Living the life I should be living.

You get past me anyways.

I'm the ultimate career assassin.

Everything just feels so out of control.

I've lost my dad, my dog, and my
dentist.

I am not losing my American Express 2.

Okay.

Even though the sex is unlawfully bad.

It is better to ride Randall than have
debt ride me.

Baby, I'm back.