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1
00:00:27,789 --> 00:00:28,910
Let me out.
2
00:00:29,250 --> 00:00:30,730
No. Let me out!
3
00:00:31,260 --> 00:00:32,260
It's not good because it's broken!
4
00:01:09,290 --> 00:01:11,530
We're expecting a quarter inch of
flurry.
5
00:01:11,730 --> 00:01:12,970
Blizzard 2011.
6
00:01:14,010 --> 00:01:15,350
Denny, cut it out.
7
00:01:15,630 --> 00:01:16,930
Well, I'm trying to find it.
8
00:01:18,390 --> 00:01:19,390
Here we go.
9
00:01:20,130 --> 00:01:22,470
It's an emergency pro case.
10
00:01:23,830 --> 00:01:24,870
Remain in your home.
11
00:01:25,090 --> 00:01:26,690
This is the big one, folks.
12
00:01:26,950 --> 00:01:27,950
Snow Katrina.
13
00:01:28,190 --> 00:01:32,110
Denny, damn it. On Cool 100. Back away
from the damn cart machine.
14
00:01:34,410 --> 00:01:35,470
Hey, Granny, look at that.
15
00:01:36,150 --> 00:01:37,150
A snowflake.
16
00:01:37,330 --> 00:01:39,660
Granny, a snowflake. Look at this
snowflake, Granny. It's real.
17
00:01:42,340 --> 00:01:43,340
Blender's over.
18
00:01:43,640 --> 00:01:45,560
Look, another one. Look, Daddy, look.
19
00:01:45,760 --> 00:01:48,680
Oh, that one's a tingler.
20
00:01:48,920 --> 00:01:49,920
Hey, Granny, shut this up.
21
00:01:50,060 --> 00:01:51,400
I'm gladdened. Woo -hoo!
22
00:01:52,800 --> 00:01:53,800
It's my turn.
23
00:01:54,200 --> 00:01:57,020
Let me get my boogie board.
24
00:01:57,580 --> 00:02:01,300
Y 'all quit playing out here now. We're
under our black -eyes advisory.
25
00:02:01,620 --> 00:02:03,820
I'm going to go on into town and fetch
you some supplies.
26
00:02:08,079 --> 00:02:10,120
Yeah, just flipped over in a ditch.
27
00:02:10,400 --> 00:02:14,060
I don't know if I'll get over to work
till the money check day comes.
28
00:02:16,340 --> 00:02:18,900
It sounds like you're at a gentleman's
club.
29
00:02:19,140 --> 00:02:21,960
Well, I ain't. I'm flipped over in a
damn ditch.
30
00:02:22,300 --> 00:02:27,460
I hear the sordid, repetitive beat, the
clapping of buttercup on a greased
31
00:02:27,460 --> 00:02:28,460
chrome pole.
32
00:02:28,740 --> 00:02:30,800
Well, yeah, that's the ditch.
33
00:02:31,300 --> 00:02:33,240
I suppose I could tell he drank.
34
00:02:33,560 --> 00:02:37,280
Oh, no, no, don't bother. I'll just have
Glenn cover for you. You'll never know.
35
00:02:39,210 --> 00:02:43,570
Glenn, I'm going to need you to sniff
all these toner cartridges and then
36
00:02:43,570 --> 00:02:48,370
proposition Gale in accounting with a
dildo crafted from a shipping tube.
37
00:02:49,410 --> 00:02:50,650
All right, then.
38
00:02:52,190 --> 00:02:53,190
Have a good one.
39
00:02:54,430 --> 00:02:58,550
You better be shaking them vines a
little better than you're doing now,
40
00:02:58,550 --> 00:03:00,770
I ain't chubbing out on this mess at
all.
41
00:03:01,110 --> 00:03:05,110
Sorry, Early. All the girls called in.
It's the Black Ice Advisory.
42
00:03:07,050 --> 00:03:08,050
Fine.
43
00:03:08,590 --> 00:03:10,990
Suppose you can crush this here can with
them mud flaps.
44
00:03:12,050 --> 00:03:13,050
Sure enough.
45
00:03:14,430 --> 00:03:19,310
Got some bottle caps for your eyes, and
got this broken fist bottle for your
46
00:03:19,310 --> 00:03:21,810
mouth, and for your nose, airplane
travel size.
47
00:03:22,210 --> 00:03:25,330
Oh, and I can't forget a big -ass hood.
48
00:03:25,630 --> 00:03:26,630
Woo!
49
00:03:28,350 --> 00:03:30,010
Hello, Rusty.
50
00:03:30,210 --> 00:03:32,470
No, man. You brought me to life.
51
00:03:33,630 --> 00:03:36,430
Wow. Used an awful lot of empties.
52
00:03:36,910 --> 00:03:41,330
They usually do a carrot for the nose,
son, but that's fine. That's fine. Daddy
53
00:03:41,330 --> 00:03:42,590
says carrots is expensive.
54
00:03:43,030 --> 00:03:46,510
They're a vegetable. You know, they
improve your eyesight. Daddy says he
55
00:03:46,510 --> 00:03:49,530
his vision with thoughtless gentleman
brand bourbon drinking whiskey.
56
00:03:49,750 --> 00:03:50,750
Of course he does.
57
00:03:50,850 --> 00:03:54,150
Come with me, Rusty. I'll show you what
a real father does.
58
00:03:54,490 --> 00:03:57,690
Besides, this brand new kite's not going
to fly itself.
59
00:03:57,950 --> 00:03:58,950
New kite?
60
00:04:01,000 --> 00:04:02,000
Poor thing.
61
00:04:02,020 --> 00:04:06,960
He ain't got nobody decent in his life,
so he has to make himself a little fake
62
00:04:06,960 --> 00:04:09,200
playmate to give him some comfort.
63
00:04:09,880 --> 00:04:11,640
Oh, that's just pathetic.
64
00:04:13,000 --> 00:04:14,040
Ain't it, Jesus?
65
00:04:16,500 --> 00:04:17,720
Yes, it is.
66
00:04:18,200 --> 00:04:19,720
Hey! Oh,
67
00:04:20,720 --> 00:04:21,599
you got me.
68
00:04:21,600 --> 00:04:24,160
And it forms a barrier of carbon
dioxide.
69
00:04:24,900 --> 00:04:27,720
We must act now so it isn't the end.
70
00:04:28,140 --> 00:04:29,140
The end.
71
00:04:30,250 --> 00:04:32,150
Wow, they light up when you walk.
72
00:04:32,350 --> 00:04:33,690
They're like space shoes.
73
00:04:34,110 --> 00:04:35,110
I love you, Daddy.
74
00:04:35,210 --> 00:04:37,810
Hey, I'm going to hang that on my
refrigerator.
75
00:04:38,330 --> 00:04:39,330
Whoa!
76
00:04:39,610 --> 00:04:40,489
Go, Daddy!
77
00:04:40,490 --> 00:04:41,490
Ow!
78
00:04:41,710 --> 00:04:44,410
Oh, my, that's quite a spill, buddy. Are
you okay?
79
00:04:44,670 --> 00:04:46,190
Oh, it ain't nothing but a thing. Isn't.
80
00:04:46,470 --> 00:04:48,410
Isn't nothing. Well, it's a double
negative.
81
00:04:51,650 --> 00:04:52,810
Oh, wonderful.
82
00:04:53,630 --> 00:04:55,870
Look who decided to show up. Hey, boys.
83
00:04:56,090 --> 00:04:58,730
I brought you some chicken bones and
used napkins.
84
00:04:59,230 --> 00:05:03,150
Just like you like it. I'm good, Earl.
We had us a sensible salad.
85
00:05:03,430 --> 00:05:05,590
Turns out carrots ain't expensive at
all. We?
86
00:05:05,970 --> 00:05:08,070
Yeah, my snow daddy took me. Snow daddy?
87
00:05:08,450 --> 00:05:13,870
Hell, ain't only one daddy in this damn
family. And last time I checked, I was
88
00:05:13,870 --> 00:05:16,750
the one who's too damn broke to pay for
your mama's abortion.
89
00:05:17,270 --> 00:05:20,450
He's more present in my life than you
are. Oh, is that right?
90
00:05:30,430 --> 00:05:34,310
He's going to want me to run that
channel knob for him. Hey, this here is
91
00:05:34,310 --> 00:05:35,289
on four.
92
00:05:35,290 --> 00:05:36,290
I want mine.
93
00:05:37,210 --> 00:05:38,210
I understand.
94
00:05:38,410 --> 00:05:43,130
Look, I'll be here whenever you need me.
Remo, get on in here.
95
00:05:43,810 --> 00:05:44,810
I'm coming.
96
00:05:48,670 --> 00:05:49,810
Morning, Snow Daddy.
97
00:05:50,090 --> 00:05:52,190
You want to go haul ass down that
sledding hill?
98
00:05:52,490 --> 00:05:55,950
Let's do something that will keep you
sledding safely into retirement.
99
00:05:57,210 --> 00:05:58,210
What the hell is that?
100
00:05:58,410 --> 00:05:59,410
They're pencils.
101
00:05:59,610 --> 00:06:00,910
It's time to get your GED.
102
00:06:01,230 --> 00:06:05,190
Daddy says I ain't don't not never not
ever cut out for no pencil pushing this
103
00:06:05,190 --> 00:06:06,850
job. Quintuple negative.
104
00:06:07,130 --> 00:06:09,310
Look, son, I'm not going to last
forever.
105
00:06:09,570 --> 00:06:13,490
When I go, I need to know you've got
what it takes to get out of this town.
106
00:06:13,490 --> 00:06:19,310
can finally live my dream of becoming a
notary. A notary? Oh, man, it's awesome.
107
00:06:19,530 --> 00:06:22,490
And I would have totally been one if I
hadn't gotten your freaking snow mom
108
00:06:22,490 --> 00:06:23,790
pregnant back when we were 16.
109
00:06:24,130 --> 00:06:27,010
Then I had to join the army, kiss those
three years goodbye.
110
00:06:27,610 --> 00:06:31,950
Next thing you know, we're divorced. I'm
stranded up here, scrambling for a job.
111
00:06:32,490 --> 00:06:36,290
You got you a whole back story, don't
you? Rusty, your friends are going to be
112
00:06:36,290 --> 00:06:39,290
getting jobs five years from now. And
what are you going to be doing? Dicking
113
00:06:39,290 --> 00:06:41,890
around in a mud pit, banging a pipe in,
calling a tambourine.
114
00:06:42,330 --> 00:06:47,750
There ain't no tambourine. Use it for
moon traveling and astronautry. Over
115
00:06:47,750 --> 00:06:48,750
son.
116
00:06:48,930 --> 00:06:51,230
Not you, you little son of a bitch. That
one.
117
00:06:51,960 --> 00:06:55,180
Here's Snow Rusty. It's time for your
first chawl now.
118
00:06:55,540 --> 00:06:58,680
Oh, man, he's going to teach me how to
do it this year. Don't you want to be
119
00:06:58,680 --> 00:06:59,940
and strong like Chipper Jones?
120
00:07:00,400 --> 00:07:02,760
You know, smokeless tobacco is directly
linked to mouth cancer.
121
00:07:03,040 --> 00:07:08,140
And look here. It's that Adventure Man
backpack you had to have so damn bad.
122
00:07:08,340 --> 00:07:10,300
Hold on a second. Now, that's supposed
to be my backpack.
123
00:07:10,540 --> 00:07:14,120
I would have got it for my other son,
but he... Oh, that's my backpack. It's a
124
00:07:14,120 --> 00:07:16,100
plastic grocery bag from the liquor
store.
125
00:07:16,590 --> 00:07:18,110
Come on, let's go. He's old news.
126
00:07:18,570 --> 00:07:22,450
Yeah, go on. If you can't take the heat,
then maybe you ought to jump out of the
127
00:07:22,450 --> 00:07:26,450
pot. And then into the pan and back out
of the pan into the pot.
128
00:07:26,750 --> 00:07:30,090
Because there's something cooking in
this chair kitchen. And it's called
129
00:07:30,090 --> 00:07:31,090
fatherhood.
130
00:07:33,930 --> 00:07:36,910
I don't know why I made you. Hell, I
don't even like young 'uns.
131
00:07:39,410 --> 00:07:41,970
Come on. Get on in here and change my
channel.
132
00:07:44,090 --> 00:07:48,090
Okay, now, I'm going to carry the E and
I'm going to stick it on the tube. Is
133
00:07:48,090 --> 00:07:51,250
that what I do? Look, we went over this.
What kind of asinine mountain math did
134
00:07:51,250 --> 00:07:55,070
he teach you? Well, technically, I'm not
even really taking a test here. I mean,
135
00:07:55,130 --> 00:07:59,430
this is all fantasy, fun and games,
right? No! Your future is riding on
136
00:07:59,570 --> 00:08:02,690
Come on, get back to it. It's pencils
down in 45 minutes.
137
00:08:03,370 --> 00:08:04,370
All right, then.
138
00:08:07,110 --> 00:08:10,790
Well, I guess it's just you and me now.
139
00:08:11,570 --> 00:08:13,050
Early? That's right, early.
140
00:08:13,660 --> 00:08:15,980
and you're about to get a dirty deed
done dirt cheap.
141
00:08:19,420 --> 00:08:21,440
It takes about a minute to get warm.
142
00:08:22,240 --> 00:08:25,580
I, uh, I think it's unplugged. Oh, give
it a minute.
143
00:08:27,180 --> 00:08:29,060
Yeah, it's unplugged.
144
00:08:29,680 --> 00:08:32,600
Ah, damn it, it's unplugged. Ah!
145
00:08:33,260 --> 00:08:34,380
Help! Help!
146
00:08:39,039 --> 00:08:40,260
Oh, daddy.
147
00:08:40,520 --> 00:08:41,799
Oh, no.
148
00:08:42,200 --> 00:08:43,200
Oh!
149
00:08:48,110 --> 00:08:49,350
Oh, this is soft.
150
00:08:49,790 --> 00:08:50,709
And coffee.
151
00:08:50,710 --> 00:08:51,990
Can I get a little splash?
152
00:08:52,910 --> 00:08:55,370
Look, Rusty. I know it hurts.
153
00:08:55,690 --> 00:08:58,010
But there's nothing keeping you here
now.
154
00:08:58,650 --> 00:09:04,730
Leave. Get out of this town. And set the
notary public world on fire. I kind of
155
00:09:04,730 --> 00:09:07,650
think you're trying to live your dream
of being a notary public through me.
156
00:09:07,910 --> 00:09:08,910
It's easy money.
157
00:09:09,230 --> 00:09:10,370
Rusty the notary.
158
00:09:10,570 --> 00:09:11,950
You know, it has a ring to it.
159
00:09:12,490 --> 00:09:14,130
But I'm not Rusty the notary.
160
00:09:14,850 --> 00:09:16,570
And I'm not Rusty the snowman.
161
00:09:17,800 --> 00:09:19,040
I'm Rusty the Tyler.
162
00:09:19,380 --> 00:09:20,380
Ooh, ooh, hot coffee.
163
00:09:20,580 --> 00:09:23,660
Nothing here. Well, there's no use for a
lawman without lawlessness.
164
00:09:24,840 --> 00:09:25,840
I'm going in.
165
00:09:26,020 --> 00:09:26,859
No, sir.
166
00:09:26,860 --> 00:09:27,860
This one's mine.
167
00:09:28,280 --> 00:09:30,980
You can do it, Rusty. I got faith in
you, son.
168
00:09:31,580 --> 00:09:34,760
I'm gonna find my daddy. You can do it,
boy. Go get him.
169
00:09:35,000 --> 00:09:37,580
I can't see him. It's so dark and cold.
170
00:09:38,920 --> 00:09:39,920
He's down there.
171
00:09:41,200 --> 00:09:42,480
Try running that rubber car.
172
00:09:42,780 --> 00:09:43,779
He might be over there.
173
00:09:43,780 --> 00:09:46,700
Early? No, I'm the ghost of early.
174
00:09:51,800 --> 00:09:56,200
That must mean I see dead people.
175
00:09:57,040 --> 00:09:59,920
Mom always said I had a special...
176
00:10:17,320 --> 00:10:18,520
Come on now, you get on out of there.
177
00:10:18,740 --> 00:10:21,340
Daddy, I miss you so much.
178
00:10:21,600 --> 00:10:24,340
Oh, son, you know you was always on my
mind.
179
00:10:24,740 --> 00:10:27,320
Except when I was trying to maintain an
erection, you know.
180
00:10:29,380 --> 00:10:32,780
Right now, what I want to do is hang out
with my son.
181
00:10:34,220 --> 00:10:35,360
You like that one? No.
182
00:10:35,860 --> 00:10:37,620
How about this one? Oh, turn.
183
00:10:38,100 --> 00:10:39,360
What about this? Turn it.
184
00:10:40,400 --> 00:10:42,300
It's the best day ever. No, again.
185
00:10:43,020 --> 00:10:46,380
You like, I like this one. No, hell no.
You don't like that? Can't. Okay.
186
00:10:46,890 --> 00:10:48,450
How about this one? No, turn it again.
187
00:10:49,170 --> 00:10:49,829
There you go.
188
00:10:49,830 --> 00:10:50,829
That's awful.
189
00:10:50,830 --> 00:10:54,010
How about this one? No. That one you
want to take? No, that sucks. You want
190
00:10:54,010 --> 00:10:54,829
go to that one?
191
00:10:54,830 --> 00:10:55,709
Change it.
192
00:10:55,710 --> 00:10:57,130
Should I go back one? Do it again.
193
00:10:57,770 --> 00:10:58,509
Turn it.
194
00:10:58,510 --> 00:10:59,550
How about this one? No.
195
00:11:00,210 --> 00:11:01,210
You like it? No.
196
00:11:01,550 --> 00:11:02,990
You want this one? No, hell no.
197
00:11:04,170 --> 00:11:05,170
Turn it.
15386
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