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1
00:00:05,339 --> 00:00:12,320
Get your Yankee ass off my property
Don't care if the bank
2
00:00:12,320 --> 00:00:18,440
gave you a deed This farm's been kind of
land for
3
00:00:18,440 --> 00:00:24,220
generations Since we beat back them
plenty Japanese
4
00:00:24,220 --> 00:00:28,840
In the war of 1812, bring our boys home
5
00:00:29,640 --> 00:00:32,560
Hell no. Hey, man, let me drive that
thing. Come on. Touch the trim.
6
00:00:34,620 --> 00:00:35,620
Oh,
7
00:00:35,800 --> 00:00:36,800
not again.
8
00:00:38,200 --> 00:00:40,600
Damn it. I've got to get out of my book
of memories.
9
00:00:41,020 --> 00:00:42,020
Why not just leave it, son?
10
00:00:42,280 --> 00:00:44,420
Keep them in your heart. Your mind
brain.
11
00:00:44,900 --> 00:00:48,280
You know, like that time we went to Rat
World down Orlando Way?
12
00:00:48,840 --> 00:00:52,340
You ain't never took me to Rat World.
There ain't no proof of that now. You
13
00:00:52,340 --> 00:00:55,940
can't neither confirm nor deny how I
shot my wife when you were younger.
14
00:00:58,600 --> 00:01:01,020
I grabbed this one as I jumped out the
window.
15
00:01:01,380 --> 00:01:03,660
I know how much you love this picture.
16
00:01:04,360 --> 00:01:07,820
I always enjoy them tennis times we had
with that family that came with the
17
00:01:07,820 --> 00:01:08,499
photo album.
18
00:01:08,500 --> 00:01:10,100
Them was fun times we had.
19
00:01:10,420 --> 00:01:13,100
With that black family that played
tennis all the time.
20
00:01:13,320 --> 00:01:16,060
I think the dad pushes them girls too
hard.
21
00:01:16,540 --> 00:01:17,900
Sure, they're successful.
22
00:01:19,180 --> 00:01:20,920
But are they really happy?
23
00:01:22,900 --> 00:01:24,140
Oh, God! It's him!
24
00:01:24,400 --> 00:01:25,400
That's all fit!
25
00:01:25,420 --> 00:01:26,420
I'm going in!
26
00:01:33,300 --> 00:01:38,420
My University of Georgia 1980 National
Championship Special Edition Junkyard
27
00:01:38,420 --> 00:01:41,860
Red Soda. Thank you, sweet Lord, he
saved us soda.
28
00:01:43,260 --> 00:01:44,400
What about Aunt Lil?
29
00:01:45,640 --> 00:01:47,400
You're right. Where is she?
30
00:01:49,120 --> 00:01:50,660
My pillow top mattress.
31
00:01:50,860 --> 00:01:51,860
It's the pillow top.
32
00:01:52,460 --> 00:01:57,380
And you're calling this the pillow top
mattress? Was.
33
00:01:58,400 --> 00:02:02,440
The fire reducted it to a pile of pine
straw soaked in kerosene.
34
00:02:03,280 --> 00:02:05,480
Massage remote was a total loss.
35
00:02:05,980 --> 00:02:06,980
Grunt!
36
00:02:07,340 --> 00:02:08,340
All right.
37
00:02:08,539 --> 00:02:10,460
Bad company. Ten from six.
38
00:02:10,740 --> 00:02:11,740
Take the cassette.
39
00:02:11,900 --> 00:02:12,900
Dolby.
40
00:02:14,260 --> 00:02:15,260
Dolby.
41
00:02:15,520 --> 00:02:16,560
All right.
42
00:02:16,820 --> 00:02:18,220
I think that wraps up.
43
00:02:19,860 --> 00:02:20,860
Okay.
44
00:02:23,610 --> 00:02:26,730
Wow, you had the original bones of Cale
Yarborough?
45
00:02:26,950 --> 00:02:30,270
And the tragedy is, I never got to share
them with you.
46
00:02:31,350 --> 00:02:33,850
Actually, Early, I think Cale
Yarborough's still alive.
47
00:02:34,050 --> 00:02:35,350
That's because he won't hear in this
fire.
48
00:02:35,590 --> 00:02:37,150
Fire consumes every damn thing.
49
00:02:38,030 --> 00:02:39,030
Okay.
50
00:02:39,770 --> 00:02:41,370
One hope diamond?
51
00:02:41,630 --> 00:02:42,950
On display briefly, yes.
52
00:02:43,270 --> 00:02:44,890
Now, that should be around here
somewhere.
53
00:02:45,150 --> 00:02:47,970
Flames won't burn a diamond, you know.
Flames may have shot it somewhere like a
54
00:02:47,970 --> 00:02:50,330
rocket. Sheriff, I don't know. Hell,
there ain't no fireman.
55
00:02:51,010 --> 00:02:52,110
The hope diamond.
56
00:02:53,160 --> 00:02:56,780
Well, at least a little rusty science
fair project survived all this.
57
00:02:57,320 --> 00:02:58,660
Ain't that the meth lab? Project.
58
00:02:58,860 --> 00:03:02,380
And it's effect on the growth of nearby
marijuana plants. Yeah, let's move on
59
00:03:02,380 --> 00:03:03,380
right over here.
60
00:03:03,420 --> 00:03:06,620
The drive -thru window will be open by
six. Come on back then.
61
00:03:09,140 --> 00:03:10,140
Okay.
62
00:03:10,500 --> 00:03:13,180
Eight or nine skidoos. Ten. No, no, no.
Twelve.
63
00:03:13,440 --> 00:03:14,440
Fifteen. Twelve now.
64
00:03:14,700 --> 00:03:15,559
Yeah, twelve.
65
00:03:15,560 --> 00:03:16,439
He's right.
66
00:03:16,440 --> 00:03:17,860
It's twelve. And top of the line.
67
00:03:18,190 --> 00:03:20,130
Only the best for my family. Hop
holders.
68
00:03:20,330 --> 00:03:22,870
Cooler under the seat. Smoking far
brackets. Grease and stripes.
69
00:03:23,150 --> 00:03:26,210
Sure read every damn one of them. Had
them stacked back there in the marina.
70
00:03:30,250 --> 00:03:31,250
Come on, man.
71
00:03:31,610 --> 00:03:35,830
You ain't got no marinas. The fire took
my marina. Oh, hell.
72
00:03:36,110 --> 00:03:37,710
Oh, put it on the list.
73
00:03:38,010 --> 00:03:39,010
All right.
74
00:03:39,070 --> 00:03:41,070
Oh, calm down now, honey.
75
00:03:41,290 --> 00:03:42,450
It'll be all right.
76
00:03:43,290 --> 00:03:46,450
So, uh, can you cut us a check now?
77
00:03:46,970 --> 00:03:48,930
Or... You've fronted us the money.
78
00:03:49,190 --> 00:03:52,150
Well... How's that work? Well, just like
last Tuesday, basically.
79
00:03:52,530 --> 00:03:57,410
See, I write up a report, we
investigate, insurance cuts a check, and
80
00:03:57,410 --> 00:04:00,110
rebuild, ignoring code and using
inferior materials.
81
00:04:00,330 --> 00:04:04,190
And then the Lord releases his anger
upon our house again.
82
00:04:04,910 --> 00:04:06,990
Maybe mid -next week.
83
00:04:07,230 --> 00:04:08,570
Does that work for you?
84
00:04:08,850 --> 00:04:13,810
Now, I am scheduled to get a perm
Wednesday, so... So he and his smileful
85
00:04:13,810 --> 00:04:16,690
could maybe try to hold off till the
weekend? Oh, boy.
86
00:04:17,440 --> 00:04:18,339
That'd be great.
87
00:04:18,339 --> 00:04:21,240
You know, this humidity just plays hell
with the activator.
88
00:04:21,459 --> 00:04:23,300
Hey, Sheriff, what do you think caused
the fire this time?
89
00:04:23,740 --> 00:04:24,740
Donnie Russell!
90
00:04:25,120 --> 00:04:28,000
Son, things happen for a reason.
91
00:04:28,320 --> 00:04:31,020
But you ain't got to go inquisitating on
that, right, Sheriff?
92
00:04:31,420 --> 00:04:33,720
Yeah, but something is bothering me,
though.
93
00:04:34,160 --> 00:04:39,160
Now, how can you have a gas leak when
you don't have any utilities up here?
94
00:04:39,520 --> 00:04:41,480
Well, what about good old natural
mountain gas?
95
00:04:41,880 --> 00:04:42,880
Pull my finger.
96
00:04:45,100 --> 00:04:46,100
Give it a tug.
97
00:04:49,200 --> 00:04:50,960
Well, it's still funny to me.
98
00:04:51,720 --> 00:04:54,220
Highbrow sums of bitches. Uh, bear with
me.
99
00:04:54,440 --> 00:04:59,540
I have a theory. Oh, here we go. Well,
evolution was a theory, too. But them
100
00:04:59,540 --> 00:05:02,720
fossils was a Jesus they rused to throw
the non -believer off the scent. Well, I
101
00:05:02,720 --> 00:05:06,060
didn't come for no monkey's butthole.
All right, now, everybody just listen to
102
00:05:06,060 --> 00:05:07,060
me.
103
00:05:07,200 --> 00:05:10,040
Now, to the trained eye, this fire
started here.
104
00:05:10,460 --> 00:05:14,640
Let this primitive butane torches
already live and burn.
105
00:05:15,800 --> 00:05:17,340
Coincidence? Maybe.
106
00:05:18,000 --> 00:05:20,120
But look at the burn patterns here.
107
00:05:20,440 --> 00:05:22,420
See, fire naturally burns upwards.
108
00:05:23,400 --> 00:05:26,940
But there's another direction that
hadn't been considered here.
109
00:05:28,080 --> 00:05:29,080
Downward.
110
00:05:29,360 --> 00:05:30,360
That's right.
111
00:05:30,920 --> 00:05:33,700
The flames came from above.
112
00:05:34,180 --> 00:05:35,180
From up above?
113
00:05:35,360 --> 00:05:37,600
Up on the trees? What's that supposed to
mean? Yep.
114
00:05:38,580 --> 00:05:39,580
Aliens.
115
00:05:40,240 --> 00:05:43,780
I'd say their ship arrived at warp speed
around 2 a .m.
116
00:05:44,120 --> 00:05:48,680
And judging by the grain of this wood,
They use them laser beams.
117
00:05:49,500 --> 00:05:52,600
Technology we humans don't have yet.
Rusty, please.
118
00:05:53,040 --> 00:05:54,200
Aliens? Yep.
119
00:05:54,860 --> 00:05:56,320
That's the name they go by.
120
00:05:56,820 --> 00:05:59,300
See, there's reptilian in there,
demeanor.
121
00:05:59,720 --> 00:06:04,520
And according to my drawings, they wear
tight red jumpsuits with white belts.
122
00:06:04,980 --> 00:06:09,880
They're here for our water, and they'll
stop at nothing till they get it. Well,
123
00:06:09,900 --> 00:06:13,060
hell, why are they shooting up our
house? Well, that I don't know, but I
124
00:06:13,060 --> 00:06:14,420
sure intend to find out.
125
00:06:15,050 --> 00:06:17,210
I've got aliens on my mind.
126
00:06:17,750 --> 00:06:18,750
Constantly.
127
00:06:26,150 --> 00:06:27,150
Damn,
128
00:06:29,410 --> 00:06:33,750
that's gonna leave a stain.
129
00:06:34,430 --> 00:06:38,310
Hell, I might have done that, but... Did
I actually do it?
130
00:06:38,650 --> 00:06:42,030
Yes, you did it! You burnt down the
house!
131
00:06:42,350 --> 00:06:43,350
Yeah, Daddy, you did.
132
00:06:44,750 --> 00:06:45,790
Let's look at the tape.
133
00:06:48,490 --> 00:06:55,450
I do not recall having done this at all.
134
00:06:55,650 --> 00:06:57,310
Oh, that's why.
135
00:06:57,890 --> 00:07:03,050
I am a Wildwood. Well, I guess that
means... Yep, that's right, Rusty. This
136
00:07:03,050 --> 00:07:07,610
is a hologram crafted by aliens in space
to connive me out of my rightful
137
00:07:07,610 --> 00:07:11,550
thinking that it was snake people from
the skies what done burned this house
138
00:07:11,550 --> 00:07:12,930
down. Snake people!
139
00:07:13,580 --> 00:07:15,660
From the skies. You said what now?
140
00:07:15,920 --> 00:07:16,920
Snake people.
141
00:07:17,080 --> 00:07:21,100
Snake people? Snake people from space.
Snake people. Oh, hell.
142
00:07:21,400 --> 00:07:24,760
Take up positions. Lock down the doors.
And lose defensive positions.
143
00:07:25,540 --> 00:07:29,860
We might not barbecue out no found alien
lizard ass meat. Hell yeah.
144
00:07:30,160 --> 00:07:31,160
Woo.
145
00:07:33,620 --> 00:07:36,460
By the lords of Gavron, they cover the
windows in plywood.
146
00:07:37,200 --> 00:07:40,520
Nice hologram, Mike. Now he knows we
torched his place.
147
00:07:40,740 --> 00:07:44,120
There's a stove in front of the door.
It's impenetrable. Dammit, why won't
148
00:07:44,120 --> 00:07:44,939
just move?
149
00:07:44,940 --> 00:07:49,180
They think we're after their water. Duh,
that is such a lizard alien stereotype.
150
00:07:49,920 --> 00:07:54,560
Can we torch the house again, sir? Yes,
goddammit. We have an easement with the
151
00:07:54,560 --> 00:07:55,560
county.
152
00:08:01,060 --> 00:08:02,440
Jackpot. Gotcha.
153
00:08:04,840 --> 00:08:08,080
Ah, so nice to see you here, San Diego
Comic -Con.
154
00:08:08,720 --> 00:08:13,280
Mm -hmm. The easement has been put on
the fast track, as you can see.
155
00:08:13,520 --> 00:08:15,480
The squids won't rebuild again.
156
00:08:15,840 --> 00:08:17,120
I'll see to that.
157
00:08:19,280 --> 00:08:20,280
Mm -hmm.
158
00:08:20,640 --> 00:08:22,580
Care for a human arm?
159
00:08:23,240 --> 00:08:24,280
Mm -mm. No?
160
00:08:24,680 --> 00:08:27,320
Mm -mm. You sure now? Mm -hmm. They're
divine.
161
00:08:27,700 --> 00:08:30,500
The meat is falling off the bone.
162
00:08:32,740 --> 00:08:33,740
Mm.
163
00:08:38,670 --> 00:08:44,310
Okay, I don't understand what that one
means. I'll see you on Gecko Play.
164
00:08:47,870 --> 00:08:54,810
Look what I found. An easement for your
land written in lizard alien language.
165
00:08:55,170 --> 00:08:56,170
Lizard alien!
166
00:08:56,290 --> 00:08:57,290
Lizard alien!
167
00:09:17,740 --> 00:09:18,860
Oh, no.
168
00:09:19,560 --> 00:09:20,680
It was the sheriff.
169
00:09:37,710 --> 00:09:38,910
It ate me.
170
00:09:39,250 --> 00:09:40,710
It took my mind.
171
00:09:41,250 --> 00:09:42,350
Please don't shoot.
172
00:09:43,450 --> 00:09:45,490
Please. Well, we out of bullets anyhow.
173
00:09:49,510 --> 00:09:50,510
Now we're out.
174
00:09:50,610 --> 00:09:53,650
Well, I guess I did burn my own house
down.
175
00:09:54,430 --> 00:09:56,630
And I suppose I'll do it again.
176
00:09:57,910 --> 00:09:59,350
Oh, not again.
177
00:10:00,050 --> 00:10:02,290
Damn it. Oh, snap, son.
178
00:10:02,510 --> 00:10:03,650
You blew the line.
179
00:10:04,970 --> 00:10:08,850
Oh, he's burning himself out. Thank you,
Mike. You did good work on this, too,
180
00:10:08,890 --> 00:10:10,610
buddy. Don't forget that. Wait, wait.
181
00:10:11,150 --> 00:10:12,150
They're looking at us.
182
00:10:12,630 --> 00:10:13,630
Engage cloaking.
183
00:10:14,050 --> 00:10:17,910
The cloaking. The invisible thing. Yeah,
that was with the sport package.
184
00:10:18,110 --> 00:10:20,410
Trap! Shh, shh. Sir, the speaker is on.
185
00:10:20,630 --> 00:10:21,630
God, let me.
186
00:10:22,170 --> 00:10:25,130
That's Rocky, bro. Oh, hell, yeah. Oh,
he's working something.
187
00:10:25,410 --> 00:10:27,710
He can't rebound what's been torn by a
man.
188
00:10:28,690 --> 00:10:30,150
Oh, hell, they're coming back.
189
00:10:30,470 --> 00:10:31,470
Oh, what is that?
190
00:10:46,830 --> 00:10:50,530
It's a graft for my hip. It attaches
with snaps, see?
191
00:10:51,890 --> 00:10:57,530
Now, they say it'll look just like my
old face in six days, but I just thank
192
00:10:57,530 --> 00:10:58,229
I'm alive.
193
00:10:58,230 --> 00:11:01,730
Leave! I'm sorry. Sorry about that. Go
ahead and shoot.
194
00:11:03,610 --> 00:11:05,490
Go, go, run, ball, run, run!
195
00:11:05,950 --> 00:11:08,290
Bring Daddy home a victory on the
fiddler's green.
196
00:11:12,630 --> 00:11:13,630
Get there!
197
00:11:16,840 --> 00:11:17,840
That's a gimme.
15221
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