All language subtitles for hope_and_faith_s01e18_jury_duty

be late for school mom i need more sugar
cubes to finish my pyramid how can that

be i bought four boxes that's how

justin why aren't you dressed for school
i'm taking a personal day

upstairs now i gotta get my own crib

You've got nightclub first period.

Yeah, like I'd wear this much clothing
to a nightclub.

Girls, remember, I have jury duty, so
Aunt Faith's going to pick you up after

school. I'm out of order?

You're out of order. This whole trial is
out of order.

Faith, what are you doing?

El Pacino, in the movie Injustice for
All.

I'm working on my audition piece to get
on the jury. What do you think?

Oh, no, no, no, no.

I'm the one who has jury duty, not you.

It's not an audition. It's a civic
responsibility, which I take very

which is why I'm not taking you.

Justin, let's go!

Why not?

Because you never take anything
seriously.

Excuse me, Mrs. Shanowski, could you
repeat the question?

No, but I'll repeat the answer.

No, no way, no how.

Well, fine. I'll just stay home and
throw together a little yard sale.

Tag anything you want to get rid of.

One dollar or best offer.

Yes.

Yes, I do consider myself a fair...
impartial law -abiding citizen.

I always buckle my seatbelt.

The strongest drug I've ever taken is
extra -strength aspirin.

Well, to be fully candid, ibuprofen.
Aspirin hurts my stomach.

But even though I'd heard it could have
that effect, I remained fair and

impartial until I had proof beyond a
reasonable doubt.

In the form of severe abdominal
cramping.

Thank you.

I have no further questions of this
potential juror. You may return to the

gallery. Thank you.

Good luck to you both.

May justice prevail.

Oh, attempted murder. This is so
exciting. I'd kill to be in this show.

Is that a show?

Sorry, episode.

Will juror number 417 take the stand,
please?

I think you may have killed her with
your aspirin monologue.

Number 417?

You had your chance. Oh, what do you
know?

I am juror number 417.

Please state your name and occupation
for the court.

Faith Fairfield, Emmy Award winning
actress.

Big fan of the law.

Prosecution may begin questioning the
juror. Miss Fairfield, have you ever

accused, tried, or convicted of a
felony?

Two out of three.

I was wrongfully accused in the murder
of Thorne. I did kill Deacon and

accidentally ran over Ridge.

I was declared mentally unfit to stand
trial. Of course, thanks to the

miraculous work of Dr.

Hans Van Gunther, I was able to regain
my sanity and lead an active and

productive life.

Until I was murdered by my sister, who
then turned the gun on herself.

Then why aren't you dead?

Oh, you thought I meant me.

I was talking about Ashley Storm, my
character on The Sacred and the Sinful.

I myself have led what some may call a
colorful life, but let's just leave it

that.

I have no more questions, Your Honor. If
you'd like to see more, I can send over

my reel.

We'll call you.

Attorneys, approach events, please.

I can't believe you did that. You were
so incredibly wrong.

I know.

Big mistake.

I should have ate the girls first.

If they're at attention...

Everyone's at attention.

All right. Would the following people
please report to the jury box?

Jerry Berlin.

God, I hope I get it. I was way better
than that blonde bimbo that went before

me, don't you think?

That was me.

And finally, Hope Shanowski.

Everyone else is dismissed.

But, Your Honor, I object.

I haven't had a chance to show you my
range.

ice machine in the courthouse.

I can't believe I wasn't even selected
as an understudy. The term

is alternate, and it's a good thing they
didn't pick you. You make a terrible

juror. How can you say that?

Because you make a mockery of the
justice system, and you have zero

span. Your focus is all over the place.
That is as hurtful as it is untrue.

George, please take your seats in the
jury box.

Please, be at intermission.

The court will now hear the case of the
people versus Victoria Dumont, the

Honorable Walter J. Pitford, presiding.

Thank you, Miss Fairfield.

Victoria Dumont is being charged with
the attempted murder of her husband,

Harold Dumont, by poisoning.

So, how are you going to vote?

I think I'll wait to hear the testimony.

Oh, man, we're going to be here all day.

Miss Fairfield, court observers may not
speak.

Hey, who's on trial here? Me or that
murderer?

There is no talking in this courtroom.

Now let's proceed to the opening
statements.

Prosecutor, you may begin.

Mrs. Janowski, do you have something
you'd like to share with the rest of the

courtroom?

That's okay.

It's not very interesting. Read it.

Hope, keep your chin up.

The courtroom illustrator has discovered
your turkey neck.

It's hereditary.

Fortunately, it skipped me.

If I hear another word out of you, you
will be removed from this courtroom.

Your Honor, if you should remove anyone
from this courtroom, it should be this

man, because he is drawing you majorly G
-A -Y.

Ooh, you made the Sphinx out of
gumballs.

Actually, those are marbles.

Honey, how was jury duty?

She got picked over me for a trial. Can
you believe that? I guess justice really

is blind.

Well, don't feel bad. If justice was
stupid, I'm sure you'd be first in line.

Ah, Charlie.

There's that searing wit that led you
into orthodontics.

So, tell me about the case. I can't. I
was instructed not to talk about it.

So as to keep an open and impartial
mind.

It was attempted murder.

Faith? See, this cheap slut gold digger
is accused of trying to marry and bury

some old rich guy.

But think about it. Why does she need to
whack him? He's so old, he's going to

drop dead any day now.

You want to know what I think? Not in
the least. I think she's being set up.

But by whom? A relative?

A disgruntled employee?

For all we know, it could be someone in
this very room.

Charlie, where were you on the blustery
night of the 17th? Oh, please.

She's as guilty as hell, and everyone
thinks so.

Of course, tomorrow there could be
compelling evidence to the contrary.

Oh, so everyone else on the jury thinks
so, huh?

When did you become such a lemon?

Are you going to be like all the other
lemons and roll right off the cliff?

I think you mean lemming.

Sweetie, the adults are talking.

Now, why don't you go put the finishing
touches on your sphincter?

One more question. Do you think your
mother would ever have tried to kill

Dumont? No, never.

In fact, when he got ill, she made him
drink a protein powder shake every day.

And if he wouldn't finish it, she would
practically force it down his throat.

Well, we've had that protein powder
analyzed and found it contained high

of arsenic.

You're wrong. My mother would never do
that.

I have no further questions.

Defense?

The defense requests a five -minute
recess.

What is it with this woman? Her client's
wife is on the line, and all she wants

to do is go outside and play.

Jurors, you have just heard closing
arguments, and in a few moments, you are

retired to the jury room to deliberate.

You should only vote guilty if you
believe the evidence is beyond a

doubt. Do not allow sympathy or
prejudice to influence you.

The law demands of you a just verdict.

Well, that's a weird way for a
stepdaughter to look at her stepfather.

Hey, wait a minute.

Of course.

They're having an affair.

They're in cahoots.

Cahoots.

What a silly word.

Rhymes with boots and toots.

Hey, fatso.

Hey, stinky.

Hey, Mr. Bad Toupee.

Where do you think you're going? Oh, I
just need to go in there and talk to one

of the jurors. It's about the case. I've
cracked it wide open.

Forget about it. Nobody talks to the
jury until they come to a verdict. But,

but, but... Nobody.

Hey, Don.

Gnarly crime scene photos.

Courtroom 4. Cool. Let me get my lunch.

Detained.

I am the Honorable Maria Von Trapp. The

temp agency sent me over.

Hear ye, hear ye.

Court is now in session.

Okay. What is the first case on our
locket?

You mean docket.

That's what I said, docket. You should
have your hearing checked.

Judge Eskin was going to announce a
decision on the matter of the people.

Versus McNeil. Ah, yes.

The old people versus McNeil case.

Fascinating case.

On the one hand, there's, well, the
people.

On the other, McNeil. Only one can be
victorious.

But who?

Hmm.

Difficult case.

No wonder George called in sick.

Watch this.

months worth of jumbled plot twists. And
trust me, what's going on here is

classic dun -dun -da!

What is that? What are you doing?

Do I have to spell it out for you? The
old man and his stepdaughter are lovers.

They're trying to frame Victoria so he
won't have to give her a dime in the

divorce. It is soap opera 101.

Faith! This is not a soap opera. All the
compelling testimony I heard in that

courtroom cannot be undone with a
single...

Sign the search warrants. Absolutely.

Leave no stone unturned. But you are not
a judge.

This is exactly why I don't trust you.

But you have to.

Listen to me. I am an actress.

A student of human behavior. For
example, right now, I can tell that

really angry.

Okay, that's an easy one. But how about
this? The court stenographer tugs on her

ear every time someone enters the
courtroom.

And the prosecutor plays with worry
beads in his pocket.

At least I hope they're worry beads.

And the defendant's daughter can't look
her mother straight in the eye because

she's bonking her stepfather.

Faith, it is too late. We have already
reached our verdict.

Then you leave me no choice!

I declare a mistrial!

Dun, dun, dun!

Madam Foreman, I understand the jury has
reached a verdict?

Yes, we have, Your Honor.

We the jury.

Find the defendant.

I'm sorry, what was that?

We the jury.

Find the defendant.

That's enough.

Throw that woman out of my courtroom.

Hey, hey, hey, hey.

Nice guns.

Ooh, big feet.

You're not stuffing those shoes, are
you?

Okay, okay, I'll go peacefully. I just,
I have one thing to say.

I am that man's lover.

What? That's right.

I'm carrying his illegitimate love
child.

That's a lie.

Oh, yeah?

Well, tell it to this paternity test.

That's a lunch menu.

me a hoagie and a tuna melt i am eating
for two did you hear what i said sweetie

he's been cheating on you with me
doesn't that make you insanely jealous

that fill you with rage don't you want
to crack and confess it was his idea to

frame your mother come on i'm offering
you a deal

Proceed to the verdict.

Madam Foreman?

Actually,

Your Honor, we might need a little more
time to deliberate.

May I ask why?

You see, I saw her look.

And this might seem a little silly,
but...

really tell a lot from a look.

You don't happen to watch soap operas,
do you?

No.

Well, sometimes there's a look. Like,
doo -doo -doo!

Ray! What happened?

Well, the case was dismissed.

Really? The daughter confessed to
everything.

Why?

or advised her to take your deal.

Wow. Guess I really am quite the legal
beagle.

It's legal eagle.

Uh, no.

It's beagle. They sniff out the truth.

You know, there is a certain madness to
your method.

But? But I'm impressed.

You do notice things most people miss.

Including me.

Thanks, Hope.

And since you mentioned it, I did notice
a teeny tiny coarse hair that you

probably missed because it's tucked into
your turkey neck.

You can take the bus home.

Aw, come on. Don't be like that.

Wait, Hope!

Mom thinks I brush my teeth, but I just
wet the toothbrush.

Feels like the perfect day to make an
apple pie.

You know what?

Scratch that.

I'm going to do something crazy.

I'm going to make two apple pies.

Hope, your sister's got to go.

Hope, please, for us, make Faith leave.

Hope, I've got two weeks to live.

And I just don't want to die with her in
our house.

When Charlie sees this month's credit
card bill, he is going to kill me.

Oh, I'm sorry.

That was totally supposed to be in my
head.

Forget you heard it.

Nice save, Faith.