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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,180 The newer tablets are portable and thinner than ever, but not so small when 2 00:00:04,180 --> 00:00:05,800 being forced inside a human rectum. 3 00:00:06,300 --> 00:00:09,040 Slight. And of course, the classics. 4 00:00:09,340 --> 00:00:11,860 Curling irons, lava, spikes, popcorn. 5 00:00:12,180 --> 00:00:16,000 We're shoving the most cutting -edge technology up people's asses. And now, 6 00:00:16,000 --> 00:00:19,120 3D printers, the only limit is our imagination. 7 00:00:19,880 --> 00:00:24,020 Thank you, Satan. Hail, Satan. May you reign for a million years. And I hope 8 00:00:24,020 --> 00:00:26,300 applause, and then I'll take the questions. I have a question. 9 00:00:26,860 --> 00:00:29,320 Why do you praise yourself in the third person? 10 00:00:31,360 --> 00:00:34,040 Well, obviously I'm Satan, so that's a joke. 11 00:00:34,540 --> 00:00:36,320 Satan likes the ladies. 12 00:00:36,880 --> 00:00:39,720 Satan don't play that. You know, that's all. I get it. 13 00:00:40,160 --> 00:00:42,820 But what about this on the first slide? 14 00:00:43,280 --> 00:00:45,680 Why does it say that your name is Darren? 15 00:00:46,340 --> 00:00:47,620 Is that also comedy? 16 00:00:48,640 --> 00:00:51,560 Darren's such a ridiculous name. You ever use these? Chopsticks? 17 00:00:51,820 --> 00:00:54,540 Yeah. Depending on the cuisine sometimes. 18 00:00:54,880 --> 00:00:57,140 Just had some Chinese food. I had some Mushu pork. 19 00:00:57,460 --> 00:00:59,480 Oh, Mushu's a real funny name. 20 00:00:59,760 --> 00:01:03,560 Yeah, it's funny. I can still smell the Mushu. Do you smell that? Like soy 21 00:01:03,560 --> 00:01:06,880 sauce? Mm -hmm. And I'm getting a little ginger, maybe turmeric? 22 00:01:07,160 --> 00:01:08,620 Oh, there you go. 23 00:01:09,080 --> 00:01:10,080 Yeah. 24 00:01:12,100 --> 00:01:13,380 Where's the clicker thing? 25 00:01:13,820 --> 00:01:14,860 I need the clicker. 26 00:01:15,060 --> 00:01:16,780 Oh, for fuck's sake. 27 00:01:17,120 --> 00:01:18,120 Ah, boy. 28 00:01:23,370 --> 00:01:24,370 Hey, how are you? 29 00:01:24,550 --> 00:01:25,970 Uh, Darren Farley. 30 00:01:26,330 --> 00:01:28,090 Hey, yeah, great, thanks. Hey, Darren! 31 00:01:28,570 --> 00:01:31,930 Whoa, Cam, what's up, my man? How you doing, man? 32 00:01:32,370 --> 00:01:35,930 Large and in charge. Oh, yeah, look at that swag back there. There's a granola 33 00:01:35,930 --> 00:01:39,530 bar in there. Nice. T -shirt. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Likes your laser pointer. 34 00:01:39,750 --> 00:01:43,890 Yeah. Cool. How's things been gluttony? Any plans for expansion this year? 35 00:01:44,110 --> 00:01:46,270 Oh, hey, expansion, yeah, I get it. 36 00:01:47,130 --> 00:01:49,690 Look at Eric over there smooching on Satan's ass. 37 00:01:51,420 --> 00:01:52,960 Oh, shit. Oh, all smiles. Here they come. 38 00:01:53,320 --> 00:01:54,320 Hey, hey, hey, hey. 39 00:01:54,920 --> 00:01:55,940 Hey, hey, hey, hey. Hey, hey, hey, hey. Hey, hey, hey, hey. Hey, hey, hey, hey. 40 00:01:55,940 --> 00:01:56,699 Hey, hey, hey, hey. Hey, hey, hey, hey. Hey, hey, hey, hey. 41 00:01:56,700 --> 00:01:58,540 Hey, hey, hey, hey. Hey, hey, hey, hey. Hey, hey, hey, hey. Hey, hey, hey, hey. 42 00:01:58,640 --> 00:01:59,640 Hey, hey, hey, hey. 43 00:01:59,660 --> 00:02:00,660 Hey, 44 00:02:01,020 --> 00:02:02,040 hey, hey, 45 00:02:02,960 --> 00:02:07,320 hey. 46 00:02:08,909 --> 00:02:12,790 No, no, no. I'm doing things up the ass in 2016. 47 00:02:13,170 --> 00:02:17,590 No, no, no. Terry and Luft is doing things up the ass. Did you not get the 48 00:02:17,590 --> 00:02:22,070 email? I, uh, radical Islam. I can have two hours, right? Nope, nope, nope. 49 00:02:22,130 --> 00:02:23,150 Moved it up. It's in 20 minutes. 50 00:02:26,290 --> 00:02:27,630 What's he really got to check email, bud? 51 00:02:33,830 --> 00:02:34,830 Oh. 52 00:02:36,670 --> 00:02:37,670 What? Come on. 53 00:02:38,000 --> 00:02:38,679 Who is this? 54 00:02:38,680 --> 00:02:40,240 It's Satan. Everybody whip. 55 00:02:41,560 --> 00:02:42,620 Hi, Satan. 56 00:02:42,940 --> 00:02:44,200 No, it's Troy. 57 00:02:44,600 --> 00:02:47,480 You're going to have to talk a little louder because of all the whipping. 58 00:02:47,680 --> 00:02:51,280 I need a PowerPoint presentation on meeting the challenges of radical Islam. 59 00:02:51,280 --> 00:02:53,260 need it in 20 minutes, and it takes 10 minutes to get here. 60 00:02:53,920 --> 00:02:55,580 Yeah, no problem. Where are you? 61 00:02:56,020 --> 00:02:58,280 North of Diary Lagoon, past Puss Valley. 62 00:02:58,500 --> 00:02:59,500 Past Puss Valley? 63 00:02:59,740 --> 00:03:01,000 Isn't that the edge of hell? 64 00:03:01,220 --> 00:03:02,680 Yeah, there's more hell. 65 00:03:02,960 --> 00:03:05,160 I'll explain when you get here. Just don't be late. Yes, sir. 66 00:03:07,000 --> 00:03:07,999 It's your own. 67 00:03:08,000 --> 00:03:14,220 And thanks to the good work of our mascot, Cornelius J. Cornship, doing 68 00:03:14,220 --> 00:03:18,220 cake giveaways in third world countries, I'm glad to say that gluttony is 69 00:03:18,220 --> 00:03:21,340 leading the way to a more diverse path in 2016. 70 00:03:22,600 --> 00:03:23,600 Thank you. 71 00:03:24,260 --> 00:03:25,260 Thanks, Chip. 72 00:03:26,440 --> 00:03:32,340 Now, Darren from Miscellaneous is going to enlighten us to the challenges of 73 00:03:32,340 --> 00:03:34,600 radicalism. Darren to the stage. 74 00:03:38,720 --> 00:03:45,440 How are we going to deal with the recent 75 00:03:45,440 --> 00:03:52,300 influx of radical jihadists? I have a multi 76 00:03:52,300 --> 00:03:58,180 -pronged, at least two prongs to the problem, 77 00:03:58,360 --> 00:04:01,780 hopefully, when I speak. 78 00:04:04,620 --> 00:04:09,600 Dare you interrupt my presentation, you lowly imps. But since you did, you 79 00:04:09,600 --> 00:04:12,160 should plug in the USB cord into that computer. 80 00:04:12,980 --> 00:04:15,280 Here we go. First slide. Here we go. 81 00:04:15,660 --> 00:04:16,659 Behold. 82 00:04:17,620 --> 00:04:21,040 What the fuck am I looking at? We're going to gay marry them, but we're going 83 00:04:21,040 --> 00:04:24,380 put them all in burkas so they don't know who they're gay married to. We are 84 00:04:24,380 --> 00:04:25,480 going to gay marry them. 85 00:04:25,740 --> 00:04:28,700 We're going to dress them up in burkas and they don't know who they're gay 86 00:04:28,700 --> 00:04:31,660 married to. They don't know who they're gay married to. I don't know. Do we 87 00:04:31,660 --> 00:04:32,780 really want women? 88 00:04:33,230 --> 00:04:34,230 Excite them, Darren. 89 00:04:34,970 --> 00:04:36,630 Darren? Who's Darren? 90 00:04:36,870 --> 00:04:37,629 It's a nickname. 91 00:04:37,630 --> 00:04:39,690 They are a well -organized and highly motivated Darren. 92 00:04:40,050 --> 00:04:42,590 They dug a tunnel in a purgatory, stoned a bunch of dudes. 93 00:04:42,830 --> 00:04:44,890 Yeah, one of them made a knife out of his own leg bone. 94 00:04:45,170 --> 00:04:47,270 They are hardcore, Darren. 95 00:04:47,570 --> 00:04:50,510 But they won't be doing that when they're too busy having gay sex with 96 00:04:50,510 --> 00:04:51,670 other. Next slide. Just go to the next slide. 97 00:04:53,350 --> 00:04:58,370 So, as you can see, we are going to contain these jihadists in a canyon 98 00:04:58,370 --> 00:05:01,330 surrounded by brown spiked pork. It's pulled pork. 99 00:05:01,730 --> 00:05:02,730 Pulled pork. 100 00:05:04,250 --> 00:05:08,970 And it's covered, as you can see, with blood. Barbecue sauce. Barbecue blood 101 00:05:08,970 --> 00:05:11,710 sauce. Bloody barbecue sauce. No, it's regular barbecue sauce. No, it's regular 102 00:05:11,710 --> 00:05:13,710 barbecue sauce. Muslims don't eat pork. 103 00:05:14,690 --> 00:05:19,350 And they don't drink. Which is why what we're going to do then is put a stream 104 00:05:19,350 --> 00:05:22,310 of vodka throughout the whole valley. They'll hate that. 105 00:05:23,570 --> 00:05:24,570 Next slide. 106 00:05:24,990 --> 00:05:29,450 The pulled pork is going to get soggy with my slush, man. 107 00:05:30,850 --> 00:05:35,220 Slush? Oh, when I take over your circle, we're flooding your entire area with my 108 00:05:35,220 --> 00:05:36,780 violent, escapable slush, D. 109 00:05:37,040 --> 00:05:38,420 We have to streamline. 110 00:05:38,960 --> 00:05:44,580 We're folding Miscellaneous into treachery, and we've appointed Eric to 111 00:05:44,580 --> 00:05:49,000 that circle. No, Miscellaneous, that's my circle. Well, it was your circle, but 112 00:05:49,000 --> 00:05:52,480 I had some guys do a 3D simulation of how the merger is actually going to go 113 00:05:52,480 --> 00:05:54,500 down, so it's behind you. 114 00:05:56,580 --> 00:05:57,580 Boom! 115 00:05:58,100 --> 00:05:59,540 Look at you, Darren, running. 116 00:06:00,120 --> 00:06:01,120 At midnight. 117 00:06:01,610 --> 00:06:03,090 We are going to explode. 118 00:06:03,310 --> 00:06:09,230 The ridge between the two circles and two will become one. 119 00:06:09,950 --> 00:06:10,950 Laugh with me. 120 00:06:14,090 --> 00:06:15,090 Sorry, Darren. 121 00:06:16,330 --> 00:06:17,330 Hey, 122 00:06:17,850 --> 00:06:20,070 five chains. How about that? You're rapping now? 123 00:06:21,050 --> 00:06:23,190 All in all, it was a pretty dynamic presentation. 124 00:06:23,730 --> 00:06:27,250 Let's not talk about it. I just can't believe your real name's Darren and 125 00:06:27,250 --> 00:06:29,690 not really sitting. You've been on this whole time. You call me sick. 126 00:06:31,360 --> 00:06:36,200 Not from the real scene. Got it? We got it. Yeah. So we're just a circle. 127 00:06:36,540 --> 00:06:39,460 You know in a public school when they've got overflow and they've got those 128 00:06:39,460 --> 00:06:40,460 trailers? 129 00:06:40,780 --> 00:06:41,840 Where are the trailer kits? 130 00:06:42,280 --> 00:06:43,360 Where are the trailer kits? 131 00:06:43,640 --> 00:06:45,580 Well, what are we going to do, Darren? 132 00:06:47,560 --> 00:06:51,180 It may be the pee -pee talking, but I'm telling how it is. And if I'm going to 133 00:06:51,180 --> 00:06:54,360 be sitting here all day with a bunch of people who say they are, then I'm going 134 00:06:54,360 --> 00:06:55,720 to have some appetite. All right. 135 00:06:56,640 --> 00:06:57,940 Oh. No. 136 00:06:59,000 --> 00:07:00,140 Give it back to him. 137 00:07:01,070 --> 00:07:02,070 It'll be worse. 138 00:07:02,190 --> 00:07:05,470 Might as well just order some appetizers. You know what's going to 139 00:07:05,470 --> 00:07:06,470 see all this flush. 140 00:07:07,030 --> 00:07:10,230 All of this is about to be our circle. We're going to be swimming in this 141 00:07:11,070 --> 00:07:12,110 I'll tell you what you do. 142 00:07:13,550 --> 00:07:15,070 You just go kill Eric. 143 00:07:15,990 --> 00:07:17,570 And you take over his circle. 144 00:07:19,110 --> 00:07:20,930 You'll be treachery at his own game. 145 00:07:23,510 --> 00:07:24,510 I like it. 146 00:07:25,490 --> 00:07:26,490 I'm in. 147 00:07:26,870 --> 00:07:27,910 Darren's going to kill you tonight. 148 00:07:28,650 --> 00:07:29,650 I knew that. 149 00:07:30,280 --> 00:07:33,340 I also knew that you would come blabbing to me about it. 150 00:07:33,540 --> 00:07:36,140 Still, though, pretty treacherous. 151 00:07:36,820 --> 00:07:40,560 I just thought I'd show you how I'd be perfect for your inner circle. 152 00:07:41,400 --> 00:07:43,040 Well, we prize loyalty above all. 153 00:07:48,020 --> 00:07:49,160 I'm kidding. You got a card? 154 00:07:50,600 --> 00:07:51,600 Hi, 155 00:07:51,980 --> 00:07:52,980 I'm Gary. 156 00:07:54,180 --> 00:07:58,640 And I don't have a business card, but I do have this napkin all covered with 157 00:07:58,640 --> 00:07:59,640 honey mustard. 158 00:07:59,790 --> 00:08:03,570 And it's got my name on it, so you can remember it. And I will take down a rack 159 00:08:03,570 --> 00:08:06,890 of ribs right in front of you if you want me to. I've seen gluttony. We 160 00:08:06,890 --> 00:08:07,890 our own excrement. 161 00:08:08,930 --> 00:08:10,190 Is this something you'd be interested in? 162 00:08:11,070 --> 00:08:12,070 No. 163 00:08:13,130 --> 00:08:14,130 Sure? No. 164 00:08:15,350 --> 00:08:17,870 I'll call you if you... You know what? 165 00:08:18,950 --> 00:08:22,110 Actually, let me just... I don't have a lot of these. 166 00:08:23,030 --> 00:08:24,030 So, thank you. 167 00:08:28,520 --> 00:08:31,960 Set up the explosives. They're going to go off right underneath the plunger. All 168 00:08:31,960 --> 00:08:33,240 systems are go, Darren. 169 00:08:34,000 --> 00:08:37,059 What? Is it cool with you, Dare, if I call you Dare? 170 00:08:37,360 --> 00:08:38,360 Sure for Darren. No. 171 00:08:39,419 --> 00:08:40,659 Because the real Satan's here? 172 00:08:42,360 --> 00:08:43,360 Darren? 173 00:08:43,460 --> 00:08:47,260 I'm... No, don't. Pull it off. Darren! 174 00:08:47,640 --> 00:08:51,460 Get up here. You're a big part of this. Darren has been a real champ during his 175 00:08:51,460 --> 00:08:54,480 difficult transition, so I want him to do the plunger. Yes, Darren. Why are you 176 00:08:54,480 --> 00:08:56,520 so far away behind that rock? 177 00:08:58,459 --> 00:08:59,900 Oh, uh... I, 178 00:09:00,900 --> 00:09:02,980 uh... Come up. Depress the plunger. 179 00:09:04,600 --> 00:09:05,600 Fine. 180 00:09:08,680 --> 00:09:09,680 I'll do it, Dave. 181 00:09:19,940 --> 00:09:23,920 I'd like to have Gary come up and do it. Gary, come on up. I don't want to do 182 00:09:23,920 --> 00:09:25,380 it. Get your ass up. I don't want to do it! 183 00:09:26,060 --> 00:09:27,500 I'm going to go. I got to get something. 184 00:09:28,780 --> 00:09:30,940 Oh, now, Eric, where are you trotting off to? 185 00:09:31,340 --> 00:09:35,260 Come on, Satan. I mean, you should do it. It's all for your glory, right? 186 00:09:35,460 --> 00:09:38,440 Well, I'm going to do that and get blown to bits. That doesn't make any sense. 187 00:09:55,440 --> 00:09:56,440 Both in the slush. 188 00:09:57,480 --> 00:09:59,140 Down on your knees, Darren. 189 00:09:59,800 --> 00:10:03,360 I am now Satan. All of you bow down before me. 190 00:10:04,140 --> 00:10:04,999 Yeah, kid. 191 00:10:05,000 --> 00:10:06,580 I'm Satan. Hail Satan. 192 00:10:06,900 --> 00:10:13,420 Build for me this barbecue pork canyon with vodka stream at once. 193 00:10:14,200 --> 00:10:15,200 Whatever you want. 194 00:10:16,000 --> 00:10:19,300 Your secret is totally safe with me, sir. But what are we going to do about 195 00:10:19,300 --> 00:10:20,300 Gary? 196 00:10:20,920 --> 00:10:23,300 He's going to blab to everybody. You know that he will. 197 00:10:25,000 --> 00:10:26,000 Hey, Darren, what's up? 198 00:10:26,480 --> 00:10:30,240 Listen, it was mind -blowing watching you bow down to that big fat guy. I was 199 00:10:30,240 --> 00:10:33,440 just like, what is even happening here? Yeah, it was pretty crazy. But it's kind 200 00:10:33,440 --> 00:10:36,180 of nice because it's like I can relax around you now, you know? 201 00:10:37,020 --> 00:10:38,020 I'll bet, yeah. 202 00:10:39,080 --> 00:10:40,080 Guys like Chinese. 203 00:10:40,520 --> 00:10:42,380 Oh, me a wreck of Chinese. 204 00:10:46,060 --> 00:10:47,280 What happened to Gary and Troy? 205 00:10:48,120 --> 00:10:52,600 Oh, they were both eating Chinese food and running. 206 00:10:53,180 --> 00:10:57,680 And they both tripped, and the chopsticks went up their nose at the 207 00:10:58,900 --> 00:11:00,000 Okay. Yeah. 208 00:11:00,500 --> 00:11:05,200 Okay. Yeah, we made a North Carolina vinegar sauce, but it's not holding the 209 00:11:05,200 --> 00:11:06,200 brisket together. 210 00:11:06,500 --> 00:11:11,980 So what I want to do is make a cornbread burn here, you know, to keep the pulled 211 00:11:11,980 --> 00:11:16,500 pork out of the vodka. But this says make benches out of coleslaw. 212 00:11:16,860 --> 00:11:20,600 How the hell do you make a bench out of a coleslaw? Just do it. 213 00:11:22,470 --> 00:11:23,510 Satan wills it. 16309