subtitlecat.com

All language subtitles for Tommy Cooper 1980 s01e03 September 16, 1980

Afrikaans

Akan

Albanian

Amharic

Arabic

Armenian

Azerbaijani

Basque

Belarusian

Bemba

Bengali

Bihari

Bosnian

Breton

Bulgarian

Cambodian

Catalan

Cebuano

Cherokee

Chichewa

Chinese (Simplified)

Chinese (Traditional)

Corsican

Croatian

Czech

Danish

Dutch

English

Esperanto

Estonian

Ewe

Faroese

Filipino

Finnish

French

Frisian

Galician

Georgian

German

Greek

Guarani

Gujarati

Haitian Creole

Hausa

Hawaiian

Hebrew

Hindi

Hmong

Hungarian

Icelandic

Igbo

Indonesian

Interlingua

Irish

Italian

Japanese

Javanese

Kannada

Kazakh

Kinyarwanda

Kirundi

Kongo

Korean

Krio (Sierra Leone)

Kurdish

Kurdish (Soranî)

Kyrgyz

Laothian

Latin

Latvian

Lingala

Lithuanian

Lozi

Luganda

Luo

Luxembourgish

Macedonian

Malagasy

Malay

Malayalam

Maltese

Maori

Marathi

Mauritian Creole

Moldavian

Mongolian

Myanmar (Burmese)

Montenegrin

Nepali

Nigerian Pidgin

Northern Sotho

Norwegian

Norwegian (Nynorsk)

Occitan

Oriya

Oromo

Pashto

Persian

Polish

Portuguese (Brazil)

Portuguese (Portugal)

Punjabi

Quechua

Romanian

Romansh

Runyakitara

Russian

Samoan

Scots Gaelic

Serbian

Serbo-Croatian

Sesotho

Setswana

Seychellois Creole

Shona

Sindhi

Sinhalese

Slovak

Slovenian

Somali

Spanish

Spanish (Latin American)

Sundanese

Swahili

Swedish

Tajik

Tamil

Tatar

Telugu

Thai

Tigrinya

Tonga

Tshiluba

Tumbuka

Turkish

Turkmen

Twi

Uighur

Ukrainian

Urdu

Uzbek

Vietnamese

Welsh

Wolof

Xhosa

Yiddish

Yoruba

Zulu

Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:13,759 --> 00:00:16,560 Thank you 2 00:00:48,809 --> 00:00:54,690 Well, not too long ago in 1944, when every mother Trump was going off to war, 3 00:00:54,730 --> 00:00:56,870 they had to lift their spirit high. 4 00:00:58,950 --> 00:01:04,370 Motherhood and apple pie. Instead of sending money that they didn't have in 5 00:01:04,370 --> 00:01:11,190 spots in the Bronx, they went to hear the kind of jazz you hear in funky honky 6 00:01:11,190 --> 00:01:15,120 tonk. It makes you want to jump, shout, knock yourself out. 7 00:01:15,540 --> 00:01:17,840 Boogie woogie beat is what I'm talking about. 8 00:01:18,180 --> 00:01:20,760 You have the heat receiving, you can dance away. 9 00:01:21,000 --> 00:01:26,000 To the boogie woogie music the piano man was playing. You can jump, shout, knock 10 00:01:26,000 --> 00:01:27,000 yourself out. 11 00:01:27,140 --> 00:01:29,520 Boogie woogie beat is what I'm talking about. 12 00:01:29,820 --> 00:01:34,180 You can pull a picture on it, it can slow, slow down. Put the boogie woogie 13 00:01:34,180 --> 00:01:36,220 on the piano man was going to town. 14 00:02:01,550 --> 00:02:06,670 And every night that dunk would jump. 15 00:02:06,990 --> 00:02:11,770 And keep them coming back for more. Man, they make you want to jump. Shout, 16 00:02:11,910 --> 00:02:13,130 knock yourself out. 17 00:02:18,890 --> 00:02:23,290 Do the boogie -woogie music, the piano man will play and you can knock out. 18 00:02:23,450 --> 00:02:27,370 Knock yourself out. Do the boogie -woogie beat, that's what I'm talking 19 00:02:27,690 --> 00:02:32,030 You can pull a boogie -boogie, hit the go -go down. Put the boogie -woogie beat 20 00:02:32,030 --> 00:02:33,970 on the piano man, I'm going to town. 21 00:02:48,080 --> 00:02:53,140 Do the boogie -woogie music of the animal man who could jump out. Knock 22 00:02:53,140 --> 00:02:56,320 out. Boogie -woogie beat is what I'm talking about. 23 00:02:56,560 --> 00:03:00,600 You could pull a switchy -boony, it could slow you down. Do the boogie 24 00:03:00,600 --> 00:03:02,820 beat of the animal man. Ha, ha, ha, ha. 25 00:03:03,040 --> 00:03:04,960 Do, do, do, do, yeah. 26 00:03:05,600 --> 00:03:07,820 Do, do, do, do, yeah. 27 00:03:08,100 --> 00:03:09,880 Shake it down, down, down. 28 00:03:10,660 --> 00:03:12,720 Shake it down, down, down. 29 00:03:13,420 --> 00:03:15,500 Shake it down, down, down. 30 00:03:16,220 --> 00:03:17,460 Shake it down. 31 00:03:21,520 --> 00:03:25,920 Check it out. Check it out. Check it out. 32 00:03:26,900 --> 00:03:28,780 Check it out. Check it out. 33 00:03:29,660 --> 00:03:30,660 Yeah. 34 00:03:39,380 --> 00:03:44,320 Ladies and gentlemen, it's the star of our show, Bummy Super. 35 00:03:47,820 --> 00:03:48,820 Thank you. 36 00:03:59,760 --> 00:04:00,760 why I'm laughing. 37 00:04:01,540 --> 00:04:02,580 I've got a sore head. 38 00:04:05,740 --> 00:04:07,160 Oh, think of my mother. 39 00:04:11,020 --> 00:04:12,020 Oh, dear. 40 00:04:12,040 --> 00:04:13,040 Look at that. 41 00:04:18,600 --> 00:04:20,260 I've been getting these terrible bad dreams. 42 00:04:20,920 --> 00:04:23,060 I dreamt the other night I was plucking a chicken. 43 00:04:25,080 --> 00:04:28,020 And I woke up next morning and the wife was bored. 44 00:04:35,280 --> 00:04:36,280 Oh, dear. 45 00:04:37,300 --> 00:04:38,880 What a wonderful day it's been, hasn't it? 46 00:04:39,100 --> 00:04:40,760 Do you know it's been 70 degrees in the shade? 47 00:04:41,620 --> 00:04:43,060 I was clever. I stayed in the sun. 48 00:04:46,760 --> 00:04:49,860 I was doing a little bit of sunbathing. I was lying out there today. 49 00:04:50,900 --> 00:04:53,880 A little boy crept across me and he poured something all over my back. 50 00:04:54,380 --> 00:04:57,160 He said, this will make you brown. I said, what is it? He said, gravy. 51 00:05:05,930 --> 00:05:06,930 Oh, good. 52 00:05:07,330 --> 00:05:08,450 I've got my dog with me. 53 00:05:09,830 --> 00:05:11,930 He's a one -man dog. All he bites me. 54 00:05:16,790 --> 00:05:18,590 I say to attack, and he has one. 55 00:05:26,150 --> 00:05:30,370 My next -door neighbour said to me, he said, you've got to get rid of that dog. 56 00:05:30,430 --> 00:05:31,369 I said, why? 57 00:05:31,370 --> 00:05:33,570 He said, he keeps chasing people on a bicycle. 58 00:05:34,380 --> 00:05:35,660 I said, I'll take his bike away. 59 00:05:36,260 --> 00:05:40,500 You know, I knew a man once who had a dog, and he treated this dog very badly. 60 00:05:41,420 --> 00:05:43,200 And he went away for about six months. 61 00:05:44,800 --> 00:05:48,920 He went away for about six months one day. Six months. 62 00:05:49,580 --> 00:05:52,620 And he left this dog no food or any water. 63 00:05:54,080 --> 00:05:55,080 I know. 64 00:05:57,360 --> 00:05:59,180 No food or any water. 65 00:06:01,960 --> 00:06:08,780 And when he came back, when he came back, he opened the door and 66 00:06:08,780 --> 00:06:11,560 there was this faithful dog there wagging his tail. 67 00:06:13,100 --> 00:06:17,520 And he went towards his master and he jumped on him and he ripped him to 68 00:06:20,840 --> 00:06:24,220 I'll tell you what I'll do now for you. I'd like to sing and play for you. 69 00:06:24,920 --> 00:06:28,760 Play the piano. I shall sing for you with that pleasure. 70 00:06:37,000 --> 00:06:38,060 I should sing for you. 71 00:06:39,980 --> 00:06:45,500 I feel like I fell off a wedding cake. 72 00:06:49,220 --> 00:06:56,020 When you walk through the storm, keep your 73 00:06:56,020 --> 00:06:57,020 head up high. 74 00:06:58,140 --> 00:06:59,140 I did that. 75 00:07:00,480 --> 00:07:01,780 And I fell in a puddle. 76 00:07:06,090 --> 00:07:07,090 golf the other day. 77 00:07:08,170 --> 00:07:10,250 Got a hole in one. The other sock was perfect. 78 00:07:13,570 --> 00:07:15,710 And I'm standing there with a golf club like that. 79 00:07:24,790 --> 00:07:26,270 I'm standing there like that, see? 80 00:07:29,570 --> 00:07:30,950 And they said, keep your eye on the ball. 81 00:07:32,810 --> 00:07:34,910 Keep your eye on it. That's what they tell you. Keep your eye on the ball. 82 00:07:36,270 --> 00:07:38,610 And I looked up, and somebody pitched a trolley. 83 00:07:42,190 --> 00:07:46,190 I've now produced for this top hat a live rabbit. 84 00:07:47,030 --> 00:07:48,690 Just wave over here like this. 85 00:07:58,650 --> 00:08:00,690 I've now produced a live rabbit. 86 00:08:02,320 --> 00:08:04,740 Hocus -pocus, fish -posed chokers. 87 00:08:17,900 --> 00:08:23,060 Ladies and gentlemen, Danny Doyle. 88 00:08:25,320 --> 00:08:27,580 Come day, go day. 89 00:08:28,320 --> 00:08:30,120 Wish in me heart. 90 00:08:33,439 --> 00:08:39,760 Drinking buttermilk all the week And whiskey on a Sunday 91 00:08:39,760 --> 00:08:46,500 He sits on the corner of Old Beggar's Bush A stride of an 92 00:08:46,500 --> 00:08:53,420 old packing case And the dolls on the end of the blank they were dancing As 93 00:08:53,420 --> 00:09:00,180 he crooned with a smile on his face Come day, go 94 00:09:00,180 --> 00:09:01,180 day 95 00:09:01,740 --> 00:09:08,660 Wishing me hearty quiz Sunday Drinking buttermilk all 96 00:09:08,660 --> 00:09:15,340 the week Whiskey on a Sunday His tired old 97 00:09:15,340 --> 00:09:21,160 hands from the wooden beam And the puppets, they danced up and down 98 00:09:21,160 --> 00:09:27,840 A far better show than you ever will see In the fanciest 99 00:09:27,840 --> 00:09:29,240 theater in town 100 00:09:31,120 --> 00:09:37,960 Come day go day Wishing me heart it was Sunday 101 00:09:37,960 --> 00:09:44,620 Drinking buttermilk all the week Whiskey 102 00:09:44,620 --> 00:09:51,380 on a Sunday But in 1902 Old said Davey Tite 103 00:09:51,380 --> 00:09:54,540 His song was heard no more 104 00:09:55,980 --> 00:10:01,720 The three dancing dolls in the dustbin were thrown, and the plane went to mend 105 00:10:01,720 --> 00:10:02,900 the back door. 106 00:10:04,840 --> 00:10:11,360 Come day, go day, wish in me heart it was Sunday. 107 00:10:13,300 --> 00:10:19,880 Drinking buttermilk all the week, whiskey on a Sunday. 108 00:10:20,640 --> 00:10:24,660 On some stormy night, if you're passing that way. 109 00:10:25,280 --> 00:10:28,020 And the wind's blowing up from the sea. 110 00:10:28,840 --> 00:10:35,760 You can still hear the song of old Sir Davy as he grooms to his dancing dogs 111 00:10:35,760 --> 00:10:36,760 free. 112 00:10:38,200 --> 00:10:40,940 Come day, go day. 113 00:10:41,600 --> 00:10:44,760 Wish in me heart it was Sunday. 114 00:10:46,540 --> 00:10:49,820 Drinking buttermilk all the way. 115 00:10:50,500 --> 00:10:53,220 Whiskey on a Sunday. 116 00:10:55,690 --> 00:10:57,890 Come day, go day. 117 00:10:58,850 --> 00:11:01,690 Wishing me heart it was Sunday. 118 00:11:03,570 --> 00:11:06,870 Drinking buttermilk all the week. 119 00:11:07,710 --> 00:11:11,090 Whiskey on a Sunday. 120 00:11:23,440 --> 00:11:25,780 Bill was handed down to me by my great -grandfather. 121 00:11:27,520 --> 00:11:30,300 It's been in my family for years and years and years. 122 00:11:31,840 --> 00:11:32,840 Please. 123 00:11:38,760 --> 00:11:39,860 What was I talking about? 124 00:11:42,000 --> 00:11:44,900 It's been in my family for years and years and years. 125 00:11:47,360 --> 00:11:48,360 Keep it up. 126 00:11:54,990 --> 00:11:55,990 Good. Good. 127 00:11:57,410 --> 00:11:58,570 I knew you were in. 128 00:12:00,170 --> 00:12:01,590 But I didn't know where you were sitting. 129 00:12:05,110 --> 00:12:07,750 I just saw that on the spur of the moment. 130 00:12:08,590 --> 00:12:09,590 I did. 131 00:12:09,910 --> 00:12:11,370 On the spur... I did, honestly. 132 00:12:18,370 --> 00:12:20,730 Oh, this could drive me sane. 133 00:12:22,670 --> 00:12:26,630 This was handed down to me by my great -grandfather. A genuine, genuine 134 00:12:26,630 --> 00:12:27,790 Meckleston. 135 00:12:28,810 --> 00:12:29,810 It is. 136 00:12:30,210 --> 00:12:31,790 Genuine. Look, I'll show you. Look at this. 137 00:12:36,810 --> 00:12:42,930 And now, ladies and gentlemen, meet my guest star, Mr. Danny Doyle. 138 00:12:45,430 --> 00:12:47,510 Thank you very much indeed. Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. 139 00:12:47,950 --> 00:12:51,210 I'd like to sing for you a very marvellous folk song. It's called... 140 00:12:51,480 --> 00:12:52,600 blowing in the wind. 141 00:13:20,080 --> 00:13:25,600 must the cannonball fly before they're forever banned 142 00:13:25,600 --> 00:13:32,500 the answer my friend is blowing in the wind the 143 00:13:32,500 --> 00:13:39,420 answer is blowing in the wind the answer my friend is 144 00:13:39,420 --> 00:13:44,460 blowing in the wind the answer is blowing in the wind 145 00:13:44,460 --> 00:13:49,120 how many years can a man 146 00:14:02,000 --> 00:14:03,000 Yes, 147 00:14:04,760 --> 00:14:11,600 and how many times will a man turn his head Pretending he just doesn't 148 00:14:11,600 --> 00:14:17,600 see The answer, my friend, is slowing him away 149 00:14:27,630 --> 00:14:30,530 The answer is blowing in the wind. 150 00:14:31,790 --> 00:14:38,490 How many times can a man look up before he can see 151 00:14:38,490 --> 00:14:39,630 the sky? 152 00:14:40,750 --> 00:14:47,110 Guessing how many years must one man have before he can 153 00:14:47,110 --> 00:14:48,790 hear people cry? 154 00:14:49,710 --> 00:14:56,210 Guessing how many deaths will it take till he knows that too many 155 00:14:56,210 --> 00:14:57,210 people... 156 00:15:08,520 --> 00:15:11,240 Thank you. 157 00:15:32,380 --> 00:15:35,660 gentlemen introducing jackie mark i 158 00:15:35,660 --> 00:15:49,520 didn't 159 00:15:49,520 --> 00:15:51,900 even know you you couldn't have been too much more than 160 00:17:57,520 --> 00:18:01,320 ladies and gentlemen, I have to give you impressions now. Famous people have 161 00:18:01,320 --> 00:18:03,260 famous countries in the world. 162 00:18:03,700 --> 00:18:05,520 Famous countries and famous people. 163 00:18:07,020 --> 00:18:11,080 The first... My 164 00:18:11,080 --> 00:18:15,620 bad leg again. 165 00:18:17,060 --> 00:18:19,540 The first... What's the first? 166 00:18:20,540 --> 00:18:21,459 Oh, yeah. 167 00:18:21,460 --> 00:18:25,700 The first... Uncle Sam! 168 00:18:30,320 --> 00:18:31,320 All right. 169 00:18:34,600 --> 00:18:35,600 Jumble! 170 00:18:37,900 --> 00:18:40,220 All right. 171 00:18:42,860 --> 00:18:44,440 Now, I don't know who that is. 172 00:18:46,240 --> 00:18:47,240 It's not mine. 173 00:18:48,900 --> 00:18:49,900 Napoleon! 174 00:18:51,420 --> 00:18:52,480 Give me a time to get up. 175 00:18:59,590 --> 00:19:01,630 It's all going wrong tonight. I can't understand it. 176 00:19:06,430 --> 00:19:07,470 Don't keep giving me that. 177 00:19:12,310 --> 00:19:13,310 English sailor. 178 00:19:17,590 --> 00:19:18,590 American sailor. 179 00:19:22,590 --> 00:19:23,690 Change sailors at once. 180 00:19:31,400 --> 00:19:32,400 You know it. 181 00:20:00,330 --> 00:20:01,890 Get those elephants off the street. 182 00:20:03,610 --> 00:20:04,610 All right. 183 00:20:07,290 --> 00:20:08,390 You're drawing me now. 184 00:20:10,530 --> 00:20:15,710 And now, for the wonderful film, The Prisoner of Zinda. 185 00:20:47,340 --> 00:20:49,100 Nelson. That's right, isn't it? 186 00:20:50,480 --> 00:20:51,480 Half Nelson. 187 00:20:58,300 --> 00:21:05,140 We should not have 188 00:21:05,140 --> 00:21:06,140 lost the war. 189 00:21:10,720 --> 00:21:11,720 Why? 190 00:21:22,090 --> 00:21:22,890 the desert song 191 00:21:22,890 --> 00:21:29,850 oil 192 00:21:29,850 --> 00:21:37,330 of 193 00:21:37,330 --> 00:21:42,130 me why not take oil of me 194 00:21:42,130 --> 00:21:47,810 thank you 195 00:21:50,190 --> 00:21:51,210 Bit of a shock, but thanks. 196 00:21:53,470 --> 00:21:54,470 Do you like the coat? 197 00:21:55,210 --> 00:21:56,210 Camo hair. 198 00:21:56,950 --> 00:21:58,430 It is genuine camo hair. 199 00:21:59,410 --> 00:22:00,410 It is. 200 00:22:00,930 --> 00:22:01,930 Do you believe me? 201 00:22:27,630 --> 00:22:30,070 are the one and only Frank Sinatra. 202 00:22:42,130 --> 00:22:48,690 Look down, look down, that lonesome road before 203 00:22:48,690 --> 00:22:51,650 you travel on. 204 00:22:56,880 --> 00:22:58,340 Make your maker! 205 00:22:58,620 --> 00:22:59,620 Stop. 14486