All language subtitles for Friendship.2024.1080p.AMZN.WEB-DL.DDP5.1.Atmos.H.264

Thank you.

Now, would anyone else
like to share?

I'm Tami.

-Hi, Tami.
-Hi.

Things have been okay.

Yeah. Um...

Still really hoping
to get a bigger car.

It's one of
our goals for TSDY.

Uh, sorry.

Um... Try Something
Different Year.

It's like a thing
we found online.

We decided to try it out
once I got better.

Um...

Uh...

I've been cancer-free
for 12 months.

But, um...

You know, I still just
live with the terror

that it's gonna come back.

It's not coming back.

He always says that,
but, you know,

I just have a lot of anxiety.

Focusing on my business
really helps.

Um...

My friend Devin
makes me laugh hard.

-So...
-Devin?

Yeah, my ex. The firefighter.

Um, rekindling
that friendship has...

it's really helped me.

You know, community
is so important.

But I worry.

Will I ever see
my son graduate?

Will I ever orgasm again?

Sorry. This is, uh,
not so exciting,

but this group really helps,
so, thank you.

-Yeah.
-Hmm.

Craig.

Anything you wanna share?

Everything is really awesome.

Tami deserves a parade.

And I'm orgasming fine.

I'll share, I'll share.

Um... this has been
a great week for me.

Craig.

The mailman screwed up again.

Can you bring the package
to the neighbor's?

Craig Waterman.

Yeah.

Yeah. I'm in the car now.

Actually,
I'm in the parking lot.

I'll be up there
in two seconds.

Perfect. Perfect.
Perfect. Bye.

Hello?

Hello?

Hi.

Howdy.

Are you... Austin?

Guilty.

Yeah, the, uh,
mailman screwed up.

Uh, I'm down there
at the end of the block there.

Oh, with the "for sale" sign?

Yeah. About to leave
the neighborhood.

It's a bummer.
Wish I could've gotten

to know you,
but yeah, we're leaving.

Sorry about this.

Oh, not your fault.

It's the mailman,
he always messes up.

Oh, well,
it's gonna happen, I guess.

Yeah. I didn't open it
or look in or anything.

-I know that that's illegal.
-Oh.

-Thank you.
-Yep. No worries.

Hey, I didn't catch your name,
by the way.

Oh, it's, uh,
Craig Waterman.

Stay curious, Craig Waterman.

You too, Austin.

Full mug
coming through here.

Careful, careful, careful.

Full mug.

Hey, java king!

Fuckin' moron.

Nicholas
from Serotonin Solutions.

Sam is on.

How was everyone's weekend?

I need to get a bigger car.

I know. Let's sell
the house first.

I can't fit this stuff.

Look what happened,
it fell over.

Hey, Shannon.
Hey, gang.

Hi.

You didn't
steal anything, did you?

House has got good bones,
right?

Sorry my wife's stuff
was everywhere.

Yeah.

-Beautiful neighborhood too.
-Yeah.

Nice people there.

Really good people there.

You have a good day.

Awesome.

Shit.

Didn't even
fucking talk to me.

Can you put that
in the front?

Like, try and find a spot?

I don't know where to put it.

Yes, yes, yes.
Ow, I got water on me!

Stevie.

Can you pass me that, please?

Super beautiful.

-Thank you.
-What are those?

Oh, honey.
The new neighbor Austin,

he brought these over
for us earlier.

He also invited you
over for a drink

at 8:00 tonight.
I said you'd go.

You don't know my schedule.

You sit there every night.

It might be nice
to have a pal,

you know, a bud.

Hello, Tami's Florals.
Steven speaking.

Just welcome him
to the neighborhood.

There's a new Marvel out

that's supposed to be nuts.

We should go see that.

Uh, my ex-boyfriend Devin,

he invited me out
for a drink tonight.

Thank you so much.

Okay. Two Luna arrangements
for a 90th.

Extra lavender.

Stevie, your mom's
abandoning us.

It's just you and I.

We gotta go see
that Marvel tonight.

I already saw it.
It's sort of...

Ah! Don't spoil it.
Do not spoil it.

What's going on?

Honey.

Please don't go out
with this fucking

dumb clown tonight.

You and I, we'll go see
this new Marvel.

People are saying
it's actually nuts.

It's driving people crazy.

It's nacho, nacho time!

Never...

Never underestimate the nacho.

Yummy. Oh, good work.

Mwah!

Delicious, huh?

-It's good.
-Anyway, I gotta go.

-But I love you.
-Have fun.

See you later.
Thank you.

You guys kiss each other
on the lips?

Honey. Go.

You...

Mmm.

Oh, you know, I, uh,

I actually
got those speed bumps

put in on our street.

Yeah. It was
a frickin' nightmare

dealing with the city.

But now the whole
neighborhood's

not a goddamn racetrack.

Well, thank you.

Welcome.

Well, what do you do
for a living?

Well, I dabble in a few
things, but, uh,

I pay those criminals
at the bank

by covering the weather
for Channel Three.

You're a weatherman?

I usually work evenings,

but I got tonight off.

I knew you looked familiar.

That's so awesome.

What do you do for a living?

I work for a company called
Universal Digital Innovations.

We work with clients

who are trying
to make their products

more habit forming.

I work with apps,
specifically.

Like...

trying to get people
addicted to products?

Uh... we prefer to use
the term "habit forming."

It appeals to the most primal
aspects of the brain.

So when the person tries
to detach themselves

from the product, they become
extremely displeased

and they just continue
using it.

Fucking brutal.

Yeah, it's brutal.

I got a product
you might like.

All right.

Porno mag?

Better.

Look familiar?

That's the box from my yard.

What's this?

That's a 400,000-year-old

stone hand axe
carved by Homo Erectus.

These are the first human
objects ever made.

You're holding
the very same tool

that some ancient person held
on in East African Savannah.

As they paused in awe
to watch the land

swallow the burning
golden ball in the sky.

Whoa, buddy.

Oh!

Oh...

Shoot! Uh...

Oh, I'm so sorry.

I am so sorry. This never...

Oh, fuck.

Let's go somewhere.

Uh...

It's a school night for me.

I'll get you a clean shirt.

Okay.

All right.

What's here?

Come on, come on.

This way.

Quick!

Before the pigs see us.

It's the Aqueduct.

It was built in 1837.
Look at this.

It connects the entire city.

Oh, my God.

Aw, fuck!

I got stuff all over me.

Ah, it looks like
OVD's gonna get

a little bit more of my money.

-OV what?
-Ocean View Dining.

It's the only clothes
that fit me just right.

Hmm.

-Wow. Looks good.
-Yeah.

Yeah, this is all OVD.

Nice.

-All this is. Yeah.
-All right.

They even make food.

This way.

All right.

There you go.

Come on. You got it.

Grab my hand.

There you go. There you go.

You okay? You got it.

Pull up, pull up. Pull up.

You got it.

-There you go.
-Oh...

You okay?

-You all right?
-Yeah.

All right.

Nice job.

Thank you.

What's wrong?

Lost my shoe.

Oh.

Ah, we'll get it
on the way back.

Come on.

This is so cool.

Oh, yeah, there's a way into
the building through here.

Oh, my God!

Oh... I thought
that was a guy.

Where the hell are we?

City Hall. Come on.

What?

Oh.

It's a normal ciggie,
it's not cannabis.

Oh. Excellent.

Oh, hey.

My band's playing
tomorrow night.

Bring Tami.

Your frickin' band?
You're in a band?

Yeah, it's gonna be
a big show.

Hopefully my boss
doesn't make me work.

I tell ya...

I am so over nightly news.

I wanna do mornings.

Why don't you just ask?

I wanted my own office
at work.

I just asked.

Did you get it?

Eat in there alone
every single day.

I can eat whatever
the hell I want.

Something big and messy.

Something really embarrassing
I don't want anybody to see.

Something that stinks.

All you gotta do is ask.

You'll be on the list
tomorrow night, rock star.

I'll be there, rock star.

All right.

Eh!

-You crack me up.
-I do?

You crack me up.

Yeah!

Yeah!

All right, friends. That's it.

That's our national forecast.

Take care of yourselves
out there

and we'll see you
tomorrow night.

I'm not clicking anything.

I think my clicker
ran out of batteries.

I tell ya,
sometimes I feel like

I've run out of batteries.

I gotta go change
my double A's.

See ya tomorrow night.

All right.

How y'all doing?

Sorry about the tie,
I just got off work.

We're Mayor Nichols Sucks.

This song goes out
to my wife, Bianca.

I feel like we need
to add something that

makes the user feel expressed
or judged.

So they keep coming back
to use it over and over again.

Like... like, here.

You see the...

They have the key emoji
down there.

See that key?

Someone named Austin
Neighbor Weatherman

is calling you.

One second. Pardon me.

Hey, buddy.

Hey, Craigy.
Hey, whatcha up to?

Just boring old crap, really.

I hear you.

Hey, quick question. You up
for going on an adventure?

-When?
-When? Right now.

-Right now?
-Yes.

Smooth cap.

Forked gills along the stipe.

Throw that on your grill
with a little butter,

got yourself a meal.

Go on, smell it.

Oh, wow. That's vanilla.

You know, I can't stop
thinking about your band.

That's so fucking amazing.

Thanks, bud.

You play anything?

Nah, I always wanted
to play drums, but just...

didn't.

Get yourself a set. We'll jam.

Play some punk music
or something.

Look, it isn't about
how well you play.

It's about how passionate
you are.

Oh, wow. Drums.

Yeah. Well...

What color would I get?

I guess it probably
doesn't matter what col...

Well, actually,
it might matter...

Oh, shit!

Oh, shit! Help!

Help me! Help me!
Oh, my God, help!

-I got you.
-Oh, Jesus!

What the hell?

Well, looks like
Ocean View Dining's

gonna get more of your money.

Yeah. Honestly though,
their new fall collection,

it looks superb.

I'm really excited about it.

Oh, shit, my phone!

Oh, fuck! My phone!

Can... Can you call it?

-Can you call it?
-I don't have a phone.

Are you insane?

I'm looking at a free man
right now.

Come on.

Look at this.

Oh...

-Yeah.
-Crap.

Oh, look at this.

Oh, man,
that's cherry.

Whoa!

Oh, yeah.

Oh!

This is my dream car.

I hope you get it one day.

This thing
is absolutely cherry.

Yeah.

Well, it might happen sooner
than you think.

I took your advice.

They offered me
the morning news slot.

Oh, my God!

-Really?
-Yep.

Congratulations! Holy crap.

Thank you, buddy. Truly.

Now, if I get this stupid car,

you're going
for the first ride.

I promise. You're good luck.

I'm good luck.

Yes, you are.

I can see the future.

It's full of pals.

My husband!

Somebody help us, please!

Helping pals.

I got you, buddy.

Thank you, Craig.

Oh, it's so cold
out there.

And being a boss.

Civilization has collapsed.

But Craig has led us
to the future.

To Craig!

To Craig!

The neighborhood would be
a racetrack without you.

I'm on the edge of life...

and the view is gorgeous.

What the...

What are you doing?

Can I wake you up with a lick?

-A lick?
-Yeah.

-Is the door locked?
-Yeah.

-Yeah.
-Okay.

Something's burning!

-Fuck!
-Something's burning?

What did you do?

I hope you like wild mushrooms
on toast, honey.

What?

What?

Seriously, what?
What happened? What'd you do?

Nothing.

-Hi.
-Good morning.

You like this?

-Punk?
-Yeah.

Oh, yeah, I like punk.

Fuck yeah.

You don't listen to music.

Yeah, I do.
I listen to punk.

I even took a walk
this morning.

Got up. Went for a full walk.

Picked some of those
flowers right there.

You made these?

Yeah.

Oh, shit,
tastes like McDonald's.

-I love it. So good.
-Thanks.

Okay, I'll see you guys.

-Love you.
-Love you.

Austin invited me
to hang out

with some of his
buddies tonight.

They seem like
pretty cool guys.

Wow, honey.

You boys want a drink?

It might be all night.

-Hey, how are you?
-Good.

I'm Craig. Austin invited me.

Oh, there he is!

All right. Hey, guys.

This is my neighbor, Craig.
He's the best.

Hey, hey! To the new
morning weatherman!

Aw! You guys, aw.

This is the one!

I'll drink to that.
I'll drink to that.

-Appreciate it.
-All right.

It's great to talk to you,
Chris.

Hey, I'm... I'm gonna grab
another brew.

All right.
Yeah, for sure.

I'll see you inside,
all right.

Yeah.

You're smart.

You have a good job.

There's nothing to be
nervous about.

Just be yourself.

You're a frickin' prince.

You okay?

Thought it was open.

You... you hit that hard.

Can I use your restroom
really fast?

So how'd y'all meet?

That reminds me,
Zed ran into me at the mall

and I was all stressed out.

I was buying a bra
for my daughter.

I mean, she's 13
and she's already a size C.

And, uh, you know,
I was just spiraling.

But I just... I see the way
that guys look at her.

You know, I'm just...
I'm scared.

Hmm. I'm sorry you're
going through that, man.

You know
we're here for you anytime.

Right? Sheila's lucky
to have a dad like you.

Ah.

Yeah. Yeah, man.

All right. Who's next?
Who's next?

Yo! Let's get the new guy
in there.

Hey.

Get him, Craig. Hit him!

-All right, all right.
-Come on!

-Get him!
-All right. Here we go.

All right!

Everybody watch out
for my face.

Some of us have calls
with CEOs tomorrow.

We got a big shot
in the house.

Focus.

Come on, Craig!

-All right, all right.
-To a good match.

Yeah, heavyweights,
make it rain. Let's go.

Ding, ding, ding!

The first punch. Damn!

You okay?
You all right, Craig?

You all right, buddy?

-You okay?
-Sure.

-Yeah.
-All right.

-Yeah.
-Sorry about that.

Let's, uh, both try to be
a little safer.

-Absolutely.
-Excellent.

You and me, pal. Okay.

Yes, yes.

-Friend to friend.
-Friend.

-Here we go. All right.
-Let's go, Craig.

-Ding, ding, ding.
-You've got this,

-like you did the last time.
-Yeah.

You didn't want that. Oh!

-Hands up.
-Yeah, yeah!

-This fight's over.
-Fuck!

-Oh... You all right?
-Oh, my God.

This guy
can't take it, Austin.

You gotta stop.

All right. Okay, great.
All right.

Maybe you should sit
this one out then, Craig.

Sorry about that.

You're okay.
All right. Let's...

Anyone else wanna go?

What the fuck, man?

Are you all right?

-Winner!
-You okay?

You knocked him out,
idiot.

Whoa, whoa.
Easy, easy, easy.

-Nah, he's good.
-Guys, help him up.

No, you're good.
He's solid.

He's good. I'm all right.

Hey, am I bleeding at all?

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

What the fuck
is wrong with you, jackass?

Cheap shot bullshit, man.
That was fucking bullshit.

Sucker punch, man!

-Bullshit.
-What the fuck!

It's all right. Get them off.

-There we go.
-Get them off me.

-Take this off.
-Get it off the back.

Okay. Easy, easy, easy.

-I'm okay.
-You good?

Yeah, yeah.

I think, uh...
I think maybe, uh... uh...

we call it on boxing
for tonight, huh?

Yeah, that's a good idea.

Hey, hey!

Look...

I know my punishment.

I know my punishment.

I messed up.

I'm a bad boy.

I'm sorry.

What'd I do?

What did I do?

I'm such a bad boy.

I'm sorry.

I'm really sorry.

All right.
I gotta go home now.

-Yeah, me too.
-Yeah.

He's gonna call his...

All right. Yeah, yeah.

-You sure? Are you okay?
-Fucking idiot, man.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

-You call somebody.
-I'm okay. I'm all right.

Just watch your back.
Watch your back.

-Motherfucker.
-Watch out for this guy.

Yeah, thanks.

It's all right.

All right. So long, fellas.

-See you, guys.
-See ya, man.

Okay.

Sure you know how to get home?

I'll do my best.

-Okay.
-All right.

Hey, man. Nice job,
you fucking cock.

All right.

You've reached
Austin and Bianca,

you know what to do.

And with us today
is our newest edition

to the Rise 'N Shine family.

He's someone you're probably
already familiar with.

Austin Carmichael,
our new meteorologist.

Howdy, folks.

Happy to be her.

H... Here. Happy to be here.

Looks like I could use
another cup of java.

Better make it a big one.

When we come back,

Austin will join us
as we talk with what

some people are calling
a six-year-old Tiger Woods.

All right,
we're back live in 60 seconds.

-Hey, man.
-That...

I watched that.
That was awesome.

How'd you...
How'd you get in here?

I have a meeting here.

Who's your meeting with?

Just some dickhead
or whatever.

Oh, I have a check for you.

I gotta give it to you
next time we hang out.

Are you wearing makeup?

I'm not gonna tell your wife.

What was up with that stumble?

Oh, uh... Yeah.
Sorry about that.

Um, new job jitters.
It won't happen again.

It better fucking not.

This your father?

Uh, no.
It's my neighbor.

Not really sure why he's here.

Hey, what are you doing
after this?

I was gonna go to Rick's Bar.
I wanna try this new thing.

They have
a SEAL Team Six lunch.

I guess that's what the guys
ate after they killed Osama.

It's 22,000 calories.

It's got four racks of ribs,
mac and cheese,

Caesar salad.

Look, it's really distracting
that you're here.

I need to focus. Okay?

Hey, buddy.

Looking good. I like it.

Oh! You're dressed
as a little doll?

Wanna smoke a cigarette
with us, little doll?

Hey. Look, you gotta go.
All right?

I'm under
a lot of pressure here.

It's a lot harder than nights.
You could just...

Just please leave. Thank you.

You have a phone?

Yeah, of course
I have a phone.

Back live
in 10 seconds.

Let's get Austin on his mark.

I'll hang out with you soon.

And did you wanna upgrade
to the Hero Plan?

It's unlimited talk,
text and data.

Plus, you get one of these
five limited phone cases.

Oh. Yeah, definitely.

Yeah, that sounds great.

Uh... I'm gonna do...
Oh, Mars Rover.

Oh...

Twins!

Beer drinking time, huh?

Yeah, I mean...
or something else.

Hey, is that, uh,

bar across the plaza any good?

I've never been.

I've seen a few gnarly
fights outside, though.

Yeah. I might step
over there and have a sip,

or a few, if you wanna
join me. It'd be cool.

Oh. I'm 18.

Ugh.

Teenage girls these days,
they look like

they're 25 years old.

I guess it's the same
with the guys too.

Receipt in the bag?

I'd love a receipt
in the bag, yeah.

All right.

Oh, and, Sir...

If you ever want something

a little stronger
than a few drinks,

you let me know.

Stay curious.

You may begin to detach

from realities you had
claimed as your own.

Are you okay?

Yeah.

A package came for you.

Oh, yes!

Oh, my God. Holy shit!

Ooh, that's exciting.

Holy shit!

These are fucking awesome!

-These for you?
-Oh, yeah.

Hey, hey!
Is your better half here?

One moment.

Honey.

Um, there's someone
at the door for you.

It's Craig.

All right.

Dude.

Check it out.

Wow. You, uh, you got
the expensive ones.

Yeah. I got green
to match your guitar.

Let's jam.

-Um...
-Whoa. You look awesome!

Oh, thank you.

Uh... Look, uh, Craig...

We had a couple of
really nice hangs,

but I think it best that
we go our separate ways.

Is it 'cause of
the sliding glass door?

I told you I'd pay for it,
buddy.

No, Friday night
was really strange

for me and the guys
and I don't wish to continue

this friendship at the moment.

You made me feel too free.

You all accepted me
way too fast.

-You can't do that.
-All right.

People need rules.

I've gotta get to this
Renaissance Fair.

I'm doing a segment for work.

Um... much luck
selling the house.

Austin, come on.

Craigy,
isn't it beautiful?

Doesn't seeing this
make you certain

that some unknowable
intelligence

is behind all things?

Thank you, Rebecca.

Uh, my producers
told me that there was

a Renaissance Festival
here today.

And, uh,

clearly I'm the only one
dressed up, so...

It's a fun... fun prank
on the new guy. Ma'am.

All right, Mama,
I'm taking off.

Did you see
that video I sent you?

Stevie, come on.

There's nothing over there.
Come here.

Look.

Free food.

That's ancient stuff
you're holding there.

People have been doing this

for hundreds
of thousands of years.

Cool, huh? Take a bite.

No. How do you
know they're not poisonous?

I'll show you.

This one needs a little ranch.

This is fun.

Hanging out at the mall,
this is fun.

Got any crushes at school?

Of course, Dad.

That guy on that pig
was flying.

What the hell?

That was crazy.

God!

I told you those mushrooms
were poisonous, Dad.

I told you.

Fuck.

Jesus Christ,
there's fuckin' blood in it.

Couldn't believe that.
You know?

Fuckin' hell, dude.

Fellas.

How we doing?

'Sup, man?

We're the smokers,
we're the smokers.

It was awesome.

Anybody need a light?

Anybody need a light?

Good?

Beers at my house this Friday.

Heck yeah.
I'll stock the fridge.

Let's do a boys night.

Can my wife come?

You know what I'm saying?

No, you don't know her.

You never met her.

No, no.

No, let's keep it
a boy's night.

I gotta call my wife.

Tell her things might
get a little rowdy

this Friday night.

This is a sword.

From Europe, 1700's.

Let me see this thing.

Hey, don't rip it
outta my hands.

It's priceless, actually.
Be careful with that, okay?

Dude, you scared
the fuck outta me,

like, so easily.

Now imagine.

You're a knight.

Staring out...

at the enemy army
coming at you.

Your heart is racing.

Why are you showing us
this thing?

'Cause it's cool.

I collect stuff like that.

It's so small, dude.

It's like... for babies.

This is a sword
for babies, dude.

It's not for a baby,
it's for a knight.

It's like when
Thanos drinks the elixir.

Sorry, sorry, sorry,
sorry, sorry.

I gotta stop you.
I gotta stop you.

This is a, uh,
no Marvel spoiler garage.

Sorry,
it's a little rule here.

I apologize.

Dude. When that ship
fucking comes in and...

...the Tesseract's like...

I'm dead serious.

I'm dead serious.
No Marvel spoilers.

-I like to go in fresh, so...
-All right.

Yeah, yeah. No worries.

No worries. Yeah.

Are those your wife's drums?

That's really funny, I already
told you they're mine.

Well, they look like no one's
even touched them, bitch.

Why don't you jam for us,
Coltrane.

Give us a little taste.
Come on, man, don't hide.

Don't use the knife like that.

Don't point the knife
at people.

Dude, he's like the Hulk, man.

Get the fuck out!

Get the fucking hell
outta here.

I said no spoilers.
Let's go. Get up.

We've been here, like,
40 minutes.

-Move, move, move!
-All right, all right.

Yeah, yeah.

There he is.

Jesus Christ.

Craig.

My key card mysteriously
stopped working.

Uh, do you need to change?

-No.
-You sure?

Yeah. I've been through worse.

Okay. Well, um...
We have a new client

that I'm really,
really excited about.

Mr. Mayor Seth Nichols.

Seth Nichols is about trust.

Now, he wants us to modernize

his reelection campaign.

Make it much more interactive.

Now, Craig, who do you want
on your team?

Besides a towel?

I'll just be a lone wolf
on this one, I think.

Honey.

You're home?

Yeah. I don't trust my lunch
in the work fridge.

I think somebody's
fucking with it.

-Can you help me load these?
-Yeah.

I gotta scarf, though.

I gotta get on a call
with the mayor

about the mayor thing
or whatever.

Oh, the...
The mail guy screwed up again.

Craig.

Your nose.

-Oh. Yeah.
-I've never...

I've never seen you get
a bloody nose before.

No, it's not a big deal,
don't worry about it.

-You okay? Here.
-Yeah, I'm fine.

I'm fine. Let's get these in.

Be careful with that.

Pick it up from the base.

Yeah, yeah. I gotta go.

I gotta have a fast lunch.
I have a big call.

Honey. I'm sick of struggling,
I need a bigger car.

I... I gotta go!

You still have blood
on your nose.

-That's fine, that's fine.
-Wipe it off.

Bye! Bye, bye, bye.

Motherfucker.

Hey, hey.

Putting you through
to the mayor's office.

Jen's on.

Joanna and Monkey
See Inc. are on.

Barry from Digitonis.

Craig Waterman is on.

So, Craig, before we start,

I wanna clear something up.

Austin?

Honey?

Hello?

Craig? Hello?

Hello, hello.

I've heard the craziest thing

that you do not
have a cell phone.

-Um...
-Somebody knocked on the door.

-Hey, baby.
-Come on, that can't be true.

Come snuggle.

I know it's funny.
Are you there?

It's nap time. Mmm.

Did we lose Craig?
Is Craig there?

Chad from Dopamine

Unlimited is on.

Well, he's probably
not responding

'cause he doesn't
have a cell phone.

-Craig?
-Yeah.

Oh, there you are.

For a short period,
I didn't have a phone,

but it was an experiment.

Man, that is...

Now, where would
you like to start?

That is really brave
of you, that is crazy.

I cannot imagine. I'm looking
at this thing constantly.

Uh-huh.

Hello?

Craig?

Hey. I tried calling you.
I need you to go to the store.

I had a nuts day.

No, honey.

Tonight,

it's Austin and Bianca's
housewarming thing.

I need you to get some things.

That's tonight?

Oh, maybe I can borrow
some things from them?

Do you have their number?

Uh, yeah, I'll call 'em.

What do you need?

Um, I need vanilla extract.
I need brown sugar.

If they have powdered sugar
that'd be really great.

Hey, Austin, what's going on?

Yeah, yeah. We're about
to head over, actually.

Oh.

Oh, for real?

Oh, that sucks. I'm so sorry.

Yeah, actually, uh, have a bad
case myself right now.

No worries at all.
No worries at all.

Yeah.

Okay, we'll...

Okay, we'll talk to you soon.

Bye.

I guess Bianca came down

with a really bad case
of diarrhea.

Oh, God.

Yeah.

Maybe I should make her
some chicken broth.

I wouldn't do that.

It'd probably just
rip right through her.

Let's just invite people over.

Maybe Devin's available.

Devin?

Do you ever listen?

Hey. Hey!

Turn those burners off.

We're going on an adventure.

Craig. Absolutely not.

This was built in 1837.

Goes all over the city.
It's called an aqueduct.

Is this piss?

Some of it. Wait...

Yes, this is it. This is it.

This is it. Yes!

Ugh.

Oh, my God.

Are we lost?

No, no, no. This way.

Craig, there's a bat.

-Where?
-Right there!

All right.
Yeah, let's go this way.

We're not going that way,
so that's not a problem.

Who showed you this?

I found it myself. Come on.

Seriously,
who showed you this place?

-Was it Austin?
-No, I found it. Come on.

You go up here
and there's some really...

-I'm not going up there.
-...beautiful shit...

I wanna go home!

Well, the bat's back there.

I don't wanna walk by
that bat again.

Come on. There you go.

There you go. Go, go, go!

Perfect. Perfect.

Okay, this is insane.
I wanna go.

Help me down.

Christ almighty.

Can you just
give this a chance?

You're always complaining
that we don't do anything new.

Well, we're here now.

You're healthy
and we're here now.

So... Jesus!

Just go ahead and
I'll catch up to you in a sec.

Thank you.

Okay.

Shit!

Where the fuck is it?

Fuck it.

Oh, God damn it.

Don't worry, honey.
We're really close.

Tami?

Tami?

Tami, where are you?
Where did you go?

Tami.

Tami!

Tami!

Tami!

Please hang up, and...

No!

My phone!

Where the fuck is it?

Fuck!

Tami!

We are currently cruising

at an altitude of 1,000 feet,

at an air speed
of 4,100 miles per hour.

400 miles per hour.

You make me a little
nervous sometimes.

Are you still there?

Who's in the background?

Is that your step-dad? Crazy.

Oh, okay. Sorry.
Yeah, I was just asking.

I'll keep going.

My co-pilot Josh
with us tonight,

hope you've had a nice
first-class flight with us.

Uh, the weather is pleasant

with light turbulence
here and there.

I need to use the phone.

I'm in the middle
of something, let me finish.

I need to use the phone,
Stevie.

What the hell is going on?

-Sir, do you live here?
-Austin?

How's the party going, bud?

We had to cancel it
'cause someone broke in.

Okay. Okay.

I don't know,
so why don't you tell me, bud?

What the hell's
going on with him?

Sir, are you
the primary resident?

Jesus! Yes, I am.
What is this about?

We had a break-in
down the street.

The dog picked up a scent
that led us here.

So you think my house

got broken into
by the same person? What?

-You broke into my house!
-Whoa, whoa, wait.

-Hey!
-Hold him back. Do your job.

You broke into my house!

What do I pay taxes for?
Hold him!

Sir, are you and your sons
the only ones who live here?

My wife does too.

-Was she here today?
-She was here all day.

Well, can we speak to her?

-She's not here.
-Where is she?

She's in the sewer.

What? What'd you say?

-She's where?
-I said she's in the sewer.

And what happened next?

We were trying to go
to City Hall.

You can get there through
the basement. Right?

Well, yeah,
but it's... it's tricky.

Why'd you come down here
on your own?

Attempted trespassing.

No, it's not trespassing.
It's adventure.

I was showing my wife
a fun night. We beat cancer.

How you doing?
You look really good.

I know these pipes.

Do you mind
if I take the lead?

-You know the pipes?
-I do.

I explore.

Wait, that's trespassing.
That's Penal Code 602.

All right,
we don't have time for this.

I need everybody
to meet me on the next level.

Yeah, I agree.

It's time to practice teamwork
right now.

Oh, no, just take him in.

Take me in?
What are you talking about?

I'm a program manager at
Universal Digital Innovations.

This fucker showed me
this place.

He picked the lock.

We broke into City Hall!

He called you guys
fucking pigs.

He called all you guys
fucking pigs!

-Take it easy.
-You're fucking pigs!

Let go!

-I'm a bit nervous.
-Nervous.

Fuck, man.

Not at all.

Hey,
I'm a little bit nervous too.

Nice to meet you, Jason.

Austin, Channel Three.

-Okay.
-I appreciate your service.

Yeah, man. No problem.

Let me ask you a question.

You, uh, mind if we get
a picture together?

-Of course.
-Yeah?

-All right. Be right back.
-All right.

This is...

This is literally
the last thing I need.

Do you have any idea
how much pressure it is

to be on morning news?

No, of course you don't.

You don't
because you're a child.

You're just a boy.

Come on, Austin. I'm a man.

Do you have any idea
the kind of stress I'm under?

It's cutthroat
and they're so mean to me.

Go back to night.

I can't!
That position is filled,

Jerry Pulmas is in it,
and he's good.

So I'm stuck.

Plus, they made me
quit my band.

They said it was a bad look.

Ah... shit, man.
You guys rock.

You could've been
a little more punk, though.

Just get outta my life.

Oh, piss!

Fuck!

Shit. Shit.

There. Is it good? Is it good?

Yeah.

-What?
-Yeah.

What? Do I...

Yeah.

See, fellas,
told you it's him.

Okay,
let's get the selfie now.

Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

All right.
All right.

-Over here.
-Yeah.

Right in the middle.
Let's do this.

By the way,
my mom loves you, man.

-Aww!
-She watches every day.

Aww. Tell her thank you.

I appreciate that.

Steven?

Hi.

-Hi.
-Hello.

Hi.

Replaced your mother
already, huh?

Sorry, just messing around.

Congratulations.

Any news?

Everybody's looking for her,
all right?

You gonna go to school?

My mother's missing.

Are you going to work?

I have to.

You should be out there
looking for her.

Hold on.

Sorry about that.
Tami's Florals.

Oh, wow. Yeah.

Uh, she's actually never done
a bar mitzvah before.

So let me get your info here.

Hello?

Hello?

Craig. Um...

I'm really sorry
about this Tami situation.

I can't help but feel
some sort of blame for this.

Oh. No, it's...
it's okay. It's all right.

Also, um...

Last night is our secret,
right?

I mean, I could lose it all
if that leaks out.

Yeah, man. It's our secret.

I trust you.

-I trust you too.
-Be well.

You be well as well.

What do people want more than
anything in the whole world?

A good relationship.

So I propose,

we don't frame you
as a politician.

We frame you as a friend.

Digital applications
will make it so people

can interact
with their new friend.

You.

The trick is, you gotta
get these people...

What the fuck is it?

Uh, the trick
with these things

is you gotta give people

the illusion
of self-expression.

That's all these people have.

And that is
definitely, definitely

something that we can
build off of.

Craig, thank you.

I've also asked Ian here

to put together
a second pitch. Ian?

-Yeah. Hey, thank you, Craig.
-Yeah.

Great.

So...
piggy-backing off that,

why don't we flip this thing
on its head?

Mayor Seth Nichols. Superhero.

I look like a Marvel.

Like Hulk, remember him?

You wanna know
what this looks like?

Another four years.

Yeah, I just had
a great moment of inspiration.

This might be it.

How about this?

Mayor Nichols.

Coward. Pig. Fuck.

Uh, his wife is missing, sir.

You only care about yourself,
you sack of shit.

You don't care about the city.

I had to go to war
with the city

to put in a speed bump.

I'm gonna beat
the fucking shit out of you.

-No, no, no!
-You motherfucker.

Get the fuck off me!

-I'm gonna beat the shit...
-Let's get him out.

Don't pick me up, Ian.
This is embarrassing.

Do not...
Watch out for my chair!

Watch out for my chair!

Ah! I'm gonna beat
the shit outta you!

-Get him out!
-No!

Oh, you spilled that water.

You spilled water.

If it was you
actually doing it,

I would be afraid.
But he's all like...

Yeah.

Craig.

Craig, get your stuff.

-Right now.
-I was joking around.

Craig, leave.

Craig Waterman.

Craig, Detective Persons here.

We found Tami.

Is she... alive?

-Here, Mom.
-Thank you.

It's hot, be careful.

Blasting the heat.

It's so fucking hot in here.

What tea did Stevie give you?

Is that... that apple berry?

It's really good
right after a bite of fudge.

I'm going to get dressed.

We have people
coming over tomorrow.

What people?

-Hey, welcome back, Tami.
-Welcome back, Tami!

Oh, hey, I'm sorry.

Is, uh, is there
a bathroom around?

-Hey.
-Hey, man.

You're the husband, right?

Yeah. Yeah.
I'm Craig Waterman.

-This is my house.
-Oh, cool, cool.

The bathroom's right there.

Oh, awesome. Thanks. Yeah.

Dude. Cool drums, man.

Oh, thank you, man.

Yeah, these things
are fucking awesome.

You don't see
a lot of green drums.

You know what I mean,
kind of like '70's type.

'70's. That's what I was
going for, '70's vibe.

-That's a cool decade.
-Very cool.

Got a lot of good music.
A lot of good music.

A lot of good music.
A lot of good music.

Yeah. Economically,
could've been better.

-Absolutely. Yeah.
-Yeah.

But we came back.

Hey, I gotta ask you, man.
How does it feel?

Oh, to have Tami back?

It's honestly, uh,
an incredible relief.

No, how does it feel
to ditch your wife?

You can't use
my fucking toilet.

You know what I would do?

I... I look at your wife
and I say, "Oh, my God.

"I would love to just even be

"a non-sexual partner
with her."

You know what I mean?

In business
or something like that.

And I would never say,
"Hey, come into a sewer

"so I can...
fucking kill you."

I didn't try and kill her
in the sewer.

-It was an adventure.
-You should be dead!

-You shouldn't even be alive.
-You... Fucking...

You don't even know me,
get the fuck outta here!

Hey! Hey! Don't do that!

Fuck you!
You fucking piece of shit!

She's so beautiful!

-Get the fuck outta my garage!
-Fuck you!

Fuck you, you psycho!
Who are you?

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Hey!

Sorry about that.
Uh... just, uh...

wanted to give a little
speech to the, um,

the guest of honor,
my wife Tami Waterman.

When we went to those tunnels,

it was for adventure.

You know, most people think
getting dessert

at Spaghetti Freddy's is wild.

Well, Tami and I do things
a little bit differently.

And, uh, this one, just...

this one got away from us.

But here we are.
On the edge of life.

And the view...

is absolutely gorgeous.

To Tami.

Tami.

Thank you.

Austin. Austin.

Look, I got up here.

Come on, you should get
up here if you wanna talk.

Since we're
doing toasts, um...

Man, my heart is overflowing
with relief

that one of
the brightest souls

in this dark world
is still with us.

When she was lost,

I was like a caveman
who lost his fire.

No pun intended.

This is a special woman
right here.

She's a... she's a warrior.
She's a healer.

She's a...

a mother, um...

Me and my crew was up
all night looking for her.

I'm just so lucky
that she's safe, you know,

because I don't know
what I would be without you.

To Tami Pinto.

Uh, Tami Waterman.
It's actually Tami Waterman,

for 16 years.
That's my best friend.

I just wanna thank you
all so much for coming.

You are all like my family.

You're my friends, but really,
you're my family.

Okay, this has turned into

a little bit
of a free for all.

Uh, if you wanna talk...

uh, please get on the chair.

And you can form a line here

by the dips and spreads. Okay?

You know what? We should
maybe even kick it up a notch.

Let's kick it up a notch, huh?

How about a parade?
Wouldn't that be fun?

A parade for Tami.
Come on, folks!

Come on, Tami.

People are gonna say,
what the fuck--

Uh, my name's Patton.

Um, I just wanna get up here.

Uh, I'm so like,
suddenly so nervous. Um...

Come on, everybody!

Fucking little rats.

We're just so happy
that you made it out

and, uh, the world's
a better place.

I'll leave you guys with this.

We should still be
in Afghanistan

and I don't know why
we pulled out

in the way we did,

it was a shame.

Hey there, and welcome back.

We are very lucky today.

Joining us now...

Hey, Stevie.
Where's your mom?

Let's take a look at
that seven-day forecast.

And... Whoa!
Look at all that sun.

It is on the way.

It is absolutely on the way.

Whoa!

Did you just nut your OVDs?

Come on, Stevie.
I didn't nut my OVDs.

Take a picture,
your mom's on the TV.

It's okay.

-And that means a storm is...
-Heading out.

That's right.
It's heading out.

It is heading out.

-You are doing a terrific job.
- No.

I tell ya. Are we hiring?

'Cause I think we've got
a candidate right here.

Oh, no.

Thank you, Austin and Tami.

Back with much more
after this.

Oh, I love this commercial.
This guy's really funny.

Hey. I got the day off.

Wanna do something?
Go to Rick's Bar?

Rick's Bar?
It's 7:30 in the morning.

And we're 16.

Oh, you can have my drums.
They're yours now.

Thank you.
I gotta go to school.

Um, you ready?

Thanks for the baked potato.

Yep.

Didn't even know you had it.

So just keep
peeling them back.

Okay.

You know,
as many as you'd like.

Oh, I feel so...
I'm a little nervous.

Are you?

I'mma say
I'm a little nervous.

It does look like you're
shaking just a little bit.

Just a little bit. Just
a little bit. I know that.

I had a banana this morning

and I'm afraid
I'm gonna overdo it.

You're too funny.

So, I just want you
to take a look

right here
at this gorgeous flower.

Wow.

Tell me. Doesn't it look like
an artist painted that?

Okay, you know what?

You just gave me goosebumps.

I love how you see the world.

I love how you see the world.

You've reached Tami's Florals.

Leave a message
and I'll get back to you.

Hey, honey, it's me again.

Craig. Craig Waterman.

Said my fucking
last name to you.

Uh, sorry. I've already
had a few boots to drink,

to be honest with you.

Um...

I... I made us a reservation.

Under the last name Fudge.

So we're gonna have to show up
and say, uh,

we're the Fudges.

Okay. Call me at Rick's Bar.

Love ya.

Honey? Hey.

I was worried about you.

Come on, let's go to dinner.

I told you
I had plans tonight.

You did?

Was that someone else?

I sent you a voicemail too.

I made us
a little reservation.

I'm fine to just order in too,
if you want.

How was your day?

It was amazing.

Yeah, I saw...
I saw you chatting up

with everybody
on the idiot box.

My heart is still racing.

I met so many great people.

Austin.

So sweet.

Yeah.

You looked so good on there.

You looked beautiful.

Oh, I think I might...
I'm think I might try

to make those biscuits
I made... tomorrow too.

You're wearing, like,
a perfume?

It's a cologne.

Huh.

Yeah, it's a cologne.

Hi.

Uh-huh. Okay.

Okay. Bye, hun.

Wrong number?

If we're gonna go to dinner,

we should probably
go right now.

I have... I have a dinner
with the TV people.

They're gonna be here
any minute.

Well, is there room
for one more?

I didn't know you were free.

Yes, I'm free.
Of course I'm free.

I'm always free.

And, you know,

you wouldn't be a big TV star

if I didn't take you
to that little cool place.

Mmm-hmm.

Okay.

Sorry.

I...

I had an orgasm
in the sewer system.

That's great.

-Yeah.
-That's great.

Congratulations.
That's really good.

How?

I was just, you know,

sitting there in the dark
and, uh...

I had this... realization.

And then this release.

And boom. Just, uh...

my whole, my whole body
was vibrating.

I mean...

Wow.

It wasn't as fun for me.

I just lost my phone and
I got arrested by the pigs.

You know,

that my mom never left
my narcissistic dad.

I'm not gonna
let that happen to me.

I'm gonna go stay
in Devin's pool house.

Until I can find a place
of my own.

Who?

Become a hero,

with the new Zenith
mobile Hero Plan.

Ask your store representative
how they can help you

on your journey to greatness.

I was able to get you
the last one.

Oh.

Did you wanna do another
Mars Rover case with that?

Yeah. Um...

I want something
a little stronger than beer.

Last time I was here,
you said you'd give me

something that's stronger.

Ramon.

I'm on break.

Come with me.

My name's Tony,
but when my hair's down,

people call me T-Boy.

What are you looking for?

I'm stuck.

I'm about to lose everything.

I can give you weed,
X, uh... shrooms.

Adderall.

Um...

Do you have, uh,
do you have ayahuasca?

Oh, no.

Uh... but I do have Toad.

-Toad?
-Yeah.

The Buffalo River toad.

You, uh, you lick
the psychedelic venom

that it excretes off
its rear glands.

He's similar to ayahuasca,
but the trip is way faster.

How much is the frog?

The toad.

$100.

What the hell am I
supposed to feed him?

No.
It's $100 for a lick, man.

I'm out of ideas, man.

Lick a toad.

Sorry, my money
kinda smells really bad

for some reason.

The bank gave it to me
and it smelled really bad.

Here. You gave me too much.

Oh.

That was sweet of you.

You ready?

I don't know. I don't know.

Here's a little pillow.

Thank you.

Your mind
is about to disintegrate.

And then your consciousness
is gonna expand

to become all of infinity.

You will feel a pain
unlike anything

you've ever felt before,

followed by a bliss, which...
can't even be described.

You will die and be reborn.

I'm gonna turn off the lights
for you.

I'm gonna put on some music

and I'm gonna
go get some lunch

because it's my lunch break.

You're gonna have such
an incredible journey.

I love you.

It is like ice cream
on a hot summer day.

Don't pop him.

You look like
you're gonna pop him.

Can you...
Can you stay with me?

I'm sorry.

I need to go get some
Rolos and a Red Bull.

It's time for you
to touch God.

Oh, big lick.

Was that too big?

Fuck. Was that too big?

I love you, toad boy.

It's T-Boy.

I love you, T-Boy.

Hey.

I actually did a little work
for Red Bull.

They were so mean to me.

Oh, hey. How you doing, man?

What's for lunch today?

Black Forest ham.

Perfect choice.

What kind of bread?

Let's go with...
Italian herb and cheese.

All right.

Foot long, right?

Yes.

Usual toppings?

Foot long cookie on the side.

Yes, please.

Thank you.

Not toasted, right?

Eh, let's be wild. Toast it.

Welcome back, Craig.

-Is it over?
-Yeah, it's over.

How long did your trip feel?
Four or five months?

It was like a minute.

I went to Subway.

The eatery?

What happened?

I ordered.

Did you get the answer
you were looking for?

No, I ordered a sandwich
at Subway!

The toad is mysterious.

That frog ripped me off.

Little asshole, little fucker.

Welcome to your new life.

This is why guys
shouldn't have friends.

It'll get you
in a ton of trouble.

People need rules.

All I need are goals.

Like trying to eat the full
SEAL Team Six lunch

at Rick's Bar.

Oh, my God.

I can't fucking finish
all this stuff.

It's the meal the guys ate
after they killed Osama

and buried him at sea.
It's 22,000 calories.

Yeah, eat up.

I'm Craig.

You're gonna grow up to be
a beautiful old guy.

Thank you, Steven.

I hope you're serious
about that.

If you want a pal,
just have a son.

At the end of the day,
I'm a lone wolf.

I accept that.

Hey, Dad, you didn't tell them
it was my birthday, did you?

Of course not. Did you?

Mmm-mmm. No.

Okay good, 'cause you know
I hate that shit.

I mean, you know
I hate that shit.

Anyway, I'm gonna
go get a waiver.

-What's it called?
-It's an application.

Application.
'Cause, like, literally,

having two girlfriends
is killing me financially.

How's, uh, Devin's
and the pool house now?

Oh, I saw him, uh,
on the news.

-I saw Devin on the news.
-Hmm.

They interviewed him
'cause one of his friends

got all burnt up.

He looked good.

-Devin looked good?
-Devin looked good.

Is Dad talking to you about
that wild hike we went on

where he ate all those
bad mushrooms again?

Oh, my God!

Are you okay?

Yeah, I'm fine.
That just, that scared me.

It's fine.

-Sir.
-No, no, it's fine.

Sir?

You just bumped into
this young lady here

and I think
you should apologize.

Did I?

Yeah, you did.

She almost spilled her stuffed
pepper all over herself.

Can you please apologize?

I'm not scared of you.

I bought a van today.

Apologies, ma'am.

Enjoy your peppers.

Thank you.

You bought a van?

I think we gotta
get the fuck outta here.

What?

I think we gotta
get the fuck out of here.

Oh, come on.

Let's all enjoy our meals.

-What the hell did I just do?
-It's fine.

Oh, you motherfuckers.

You motherfuckers.

Happy birthday!

Blow it out.
Come on, we gotta go.

Craig...
this is too much.

Well, you needed it
and you deserve it.

Hey, Mom, do you wanna
come inside after this

and watch a movie
or something?

Um...

Yeah.

Yes. Whatever you want,
birthday boy.

Cool.

Oh! Austin got a new car.

Sick.

Whoa. That is so fucking pimp.

There's lots of cars.

They must be having a party.

Oh, by the way.

This came. Um...
it's the wrong address again.

All right. Can you
run it down to him?

-I'm gonna give Ma the tour.
-Yeah. Okay.

Oh! By the way, there's a new
Marvel we should totally rent.

I heard it's pretty crazy.

Yeah, that'd be...
that'd be really nice.

Craig.

I can't believe
you got me that van.

Seriously. It is... it's so...

I should've done it
a long time ago.

I wasted so much time
doing nothing.

Hey.

You been working out?

I'm just losing weight

'cause I walk all day,
every single day,

and everybody screams at me.
Everybody fucking hates me.

Huh.

You look like
you've been working out.

You been working out?

-Yeah.
-Yeah?

Yeah. You wanna feel my abs?

Yeah, if that's all right.

Yeah.

Okay. I don't know
how to do it.

-No, do it hard!
-All right.

I can't. Oh! Ouch!

-This is good, right?
-Well, I didn't say hit me!

Hi.

What, are you guys
punching each other?

Oh, shit.

I forgot to get candles.
I gotta get candles.

All right. We'll do presents
in about five minutes.

All right?
You little heartbreaker.

Hey, Craig.

You wanna take it for a spin?

Yeah. Hell yeah.

It's really nice
having you in the house.

I'll see you soon.

All right, I'll be back.

Who's he?

Hey, Zed!

Look at this.

We're just getting started

and I'm already
double-fisting.

Hey, everybody.
It's been a minute.

Craig.

You can't just come in here.

I just came
to congratulate you

on that hot rod.
That thing is pimp!

My God!

Heck, yeah.

Come on, why don't we, uh...

I actually got
a new car myself.

I got a Town and Country,
midnight envy green,

-gently used. It's so cool.
-Let's go catch up...

-I should bring mine...
-Why don't we...

Hey! Snacks are going
all out tonight.

Oh, Garrett.

I've been thinking so much

about your
little busty daughter

who everybody
keeps staring at.

Why are people
such bad people?

All right.

I'll be outta your hair
in just a sec.

I just wanted to apologize

for how I acted the last time
we hung out.

I wanna say sorry to Austin
for popping you and...

making the night weird
and have to end early.

I just think it's...

a lot of stress
I'm dealing with right now

and it came out in that way,
I'm sorry.

Well, look, hey,
we appreciate that, Craig.

Honestly. Come on.

Let me show you the hot rod.
Come on.

Is it cool if I stay?

I apologized.

So, that's it.

I did one strange thing
and I'm toast?

One thing.

That's it. One thing
and you throw me out.

Maybe you guys
are the bad guys, huh?

Are you guys the bad guys?

I mean, I know you're not.

But can you give me
a second chance?

Give me a second chance.

Get to know me.

Ask me something.
Get to know me.

All right, come on. Let's go.
Let's go. Come on.

Come on! Ask me something.

Whoa, whoa!

Get to know me, come on!
Get to know me!

Ask me something!

I got great
"Would you rathers!"

Don't I, Austin?

Would you rathers?

Would you rather, like...

Oh, would you rather, uh,
do stand up

for one whole year
just for your dad,

or would you rather fucking...
I don't know.

I can't think of anything!
I'm too nervous!

I'm too nervous and stressed!

You.

Ask me something.
Ask me something!

All right, uh...

What...

What's your favorite food?

Fuck, I can't fucking
think of anything!

I'm too nervous!

Somebody else ask me!

You!

Who the hell are you?

You guys got a new guy?

There's a new guy?

-What's your name?
-Jimp.

I got two twin girls.

Jim?

No, Jimp.

It's like jump with an "I."

-Jimp?
-Jimp. Yeah.

I'm sorry.

This is fucking insane.

This is insane.

I'm sorry.

Should we just sing?

Let's sing.

Fuck!

Everybody, get the fuck
on the ground!

I'm in charge now!
I'm the one in charge!

Don't even fucking look at me!

Keep your heads down!

Your hair.

I'll blow your heads off!

Keep 'em down!

Garrett, I wanna blow
your fat fucking head off!

You demand attention!
I'm sick of it!

You rich babies!

You're good.

All right, folks.

This has been a blast.

But unfortunately,

it's a school night
for your daddy.

You rats!

You called the fucking cops?

-Great hanging, Craigy.
-So fun, dude.

Great to see you guys.

Great to see you, man.

Of course, of course.

-I'll see you Friday night.
-Yes. Yes. I'll be there.

-I'll call you later.
-Yeah, see ya. See ya.

Yeah.

All right. All right.

Hey.

You know
how to get home, right?

I'll do my best.

Hey.

I love you, rock star.

I love you, Craigy.