All language subtitles for Gidget.S01E20.Ego.A.Go.Go.1080p.BluRay.FLAC2.0.H.264-BTN_track4_[eng]

[no Audible dialogue]

Shari Lou, you going
to the Spinsters Hop?

- Natch.
- Who are you taking?

Deke Masters.
Oh, wow!

Gidget, you going
to the Spinsters Hop?

I thought you would be.
Who are you taking?

Wally Purcell, the captain
of the debating squad...

whose aunt just so
happens to be one of

Rock Hudson's
secretary's half sister?

No, Larue! Then
who? Mitch Shields,

who crewed three times
in the Ensenada yacht race...

coming in second on his
first try in a homemade boat.

Larue!
One of those letter men.

Hi, Gidge. Hello, Gidge. Hi.

So who are you taking?
Uh, hi, Gidget.

Uh, my father said
I could rent a tux,

so everything is A-oh-boy!

♪ [jazzy pop]

♪ If you're in doubt
about angels ♪

♪ Being real

♪ I can arrange to change

♪ Any doubts you feel

♪ Wait till you see
my Gidget ♪

♪ You'll want her
for your valentine ♪

♪ You're gonna say
she's all that you adore ♪

♪ But stay away
Gidget is spoken for ♪

♪ You're gonna find
that Gidget is ♪

♪ Mine ♪

Durf. Of all people in
the world, Durf the Drag.

Just tell me why. That's
all. A simple little "Why?"

I wanted to build up his ego.

He's always slumping around the

school like no
one can stand him.

You know why?
'Cause no one can stand

him. 'Cause no
one can stand him.

He has no self-confidence.

Because he can't
even stand himself.

Well, one thing,
he's got good taste.

Anyway, who are you, Florence

Nightingale? I made
a bet with John.

Your psycho brother-in-law?

It is my contention that a
therapeutic life experience...

can mend a shattered
ego, or at least

put it back on
the road to health.

Listen, stuck is stuck.

Besides, since when am I
in contest with Shari Lou?

Since she transferred over
from Uni High four weeks ago

and set you up
as the competition.

Well, I couldn't care less.

Maybe if I'm really lucky, I'll
break my leg before the dance.

Well, you know,
you could break the date.

Breaking the leg
would be easier.

Did you see the way he
looked today? Different.

He almost smiled.
You thought he was smiling?

You should've seen
Shari Lou.

She practically unzipped
the whole top of her head.

You know who you should
show up with?

A cross between Prince Charming,
Ringo and Sandy Koufax.

Forget it. Anybody
who's one-fortieth

of that is already taken.

6'1",175 pound even.

Run the hundred
in 9.5 flat. Full

equipment. Move like a whippet.

[exclaims] And my 70-yard

touchdown passes
are not uncommon.

Uh, one of you Gadget?

Gidget.
Oh.

Chuck Batson.
Your "fodder" said to wait.

My fodder-- Father?

The prof's gonna coach me.

At college, you
wanna be quarterback,

they got a rule
about grammar, and--

Well, they don't think
I talk such hot grammar.

Back home in Bensonhurst,
I talk splendid.

But rules is rules,
huh, Gadget?

Gidget. I'm Larue. I think
you talk splendid right here.

Yeah. So anyway, I'm waitin' for
your old man. I mean, the prof.

Go ahead, Gadget, Leroy.

It's okay.

What makes you so sure
he'll go to the dance with you?

"At college, you
wanna play quarterback,

you got a rule about grammar."

You wanna get a good grade from

prof, you get in
good with Gadget."

You father would never
grade like that.

You know that and
I know that, but, uh,

Superman is new
around here, eh, Leroy?

That's blackmail.
It's polished persuasion.

And any girl who didn't
take advantage of it is crazy.

So what are you gonna
tell Durf? The truth.

That you're ditching him
to show up Shari Lou?

Not that truth.
Which?

I don't know.
I haven't made it up yet.

But I will. I may hate
myself in the morning,

but I can't pass up
a once-in-a-lifetime

opportunity like this.

Uh-uh.
Uh-uh what?

Uh-uh.
You'll never do it.

[speaking French]

That's French for "If you
think so, that's your problem."

Coq au vin--
That's French for "chicken."

What's such a big deal
about breaking a date anyway?

[voice cracking] Hello.

[clears throat] Hello. Mrs. Durf ner?

Is Norman there?
He isn't?

Oh, what a pity.
No, no, no message.

All right.
Tell him Gidget called...

and asked him
to come over tonight.

Yes.

Yes, it's Norman Durf ner
I want.

Well, sure I'm a girl.

Yes. The Norman Durf ner who
goes to Westside High. Right.

toodles.

Ooh! You'd think a girl
never called him before.

Yeah. Well,
that's the first step.

Stand by for the second.
What are you gonna do?

I'm gonna go show 6'1",
175 even...

what a close
relationship between

fodder and daughter looks like.

A relationship in which
there is an exchange...

of trust and ideas
and influence.

And I'm supposed to
just stand here? Here.

Do your eye exercises.

Once more, Chuck.

What is the subject
of this sentence?

Abraham Lincoln was the 16th
president of the United States.

Take your time.
Think about it.

Abraham Lincoln...

was the 16th president
of the United States.

The subject?

United States.

- President?
- No. Abraham Lincoln, Chuck.

You see, the subject of--
Hi, Daddy.

Hello, honey.
I didn't hear you come in.

Oh. I didn't know you
were busy. We're very close.

Yes, that's true.
I am close to strangling.

I didn't mean to interrupt.
Who pushed you into it?

No, I meant I didn't realize
Chuck was still here.

Yeah, me and Abraham Lincoln.

- You two have met?
- Me and Gadget are old friends.

- "Gidget and I
are old friends."

- Well, you're her fodder.

Yes. And he's the best
fodder a girl ever had.

If the commercial is over, I'd
like to get on with the show.

I just wanted to
welcome you home. Yeah.

I'm touched.
Now, Chuck--

Mr. Javits eats dinner.
The subject?

Dinner.

Daddy--
I'm welcomed. I'm welcomed.

No, no.
Um, I thought--

- May I? Chuck?
- Yeah, kid?

Beyond a shadow of a doubt,

Chuck Batson will
be the West Coast's

outstanding
quarterback this year.

- Subject?
- Chuck Batson!

Verb?
Will be!

- Object?
- Quarterback.

And star is an adverb.

It's an adjective. But
that's very good, Chuck.

Go ahead.
It's all right.

[Gidget narrating] It came zero hour minus one,

and I was already
in hot water.

Soon, old Durf the Drag
was gonna show up,

and I was gonna have
to break his heart.

Maybe I wasn't going
to exactly break his heart,

but I was sure going to do
a little shattering to his ego.

[plate shatters]

[chuckles] Nothing like
a little shattering practice.

[sighs] Isn't this relaxing?

Oh, yeah.
Relaxing.

Boy, I'm really...
relaxed.

I've never been so,
uh, relaxed. Relaxed.

Yeah.
Are you warm enough?

What do you mean?

I just meant I could get one
of my father's sweaters for you.

Oh. No.
I'm swell.

I'm warm-blooded.
I mean, my--

My normal body temperature
is-is abnormally high.

[grunts] You may
not believe this, but, uh,

I've never been in a patio
at night with a girl before.

Oh, I can't believe that.

No. Why should I lie
about a thing like that?

Oh, no, no. I mean, it's hard
to understand how a fellow as...

attractive as you are--

Attractive?
Oh, come on.

Well, there you go
knocking yourself again.

You happen to be
very attractive.

Oh, take your eyes.

You have very expressive eyes.

So do cocker spaniels.

[chuckles] That's another thing.

You have such
a wonderful sense of humor.

- Gidget, you're a nice girl.
- Well, I'm not just being nice.

I want you to see yourself
as I see you.

- Attractive?
- Attractive.

- Expressive eyes?
- Very.

And the sense of
humor is wonderful.

Wonderful.

And that's why you asked
me to the dance? Yes.

Well. Gee.

I had no idea. I always sort of

thought you thought
I was a schlump.

Oh, absolutely not.

Gee!

I also think
you're very sensible...

and mature
and understanding.

That's what I'd like
to talk to you about, Norman.

[clears throat] I think I'd

better talk to
you first, Gidget.

- The thing is, Norman-- You
may or may not be aware of this,

but I have this uncle who is
a brain specialist in Chicago--

Your uncle? What does
your uncle have to do with it?

Well, you see, he's
always sort of had the

idea that I would
follow in his footsteps.

I once tried to
follow in my father's

footsteps, but he
got aggravated.

Anyway, this is gonna take a
long time. One year high school,

four year pre-med,
four year medical school,

one year interning,
and the brain residency.

That's 15 years, Gidget.

Oh, that's very interesting,
Norman. But what are you saying?

Well, you're a very
nice girl, Gidget,

and I'd do anything
not to hurt your ego,

but, uh, I'm just not ready
to get serious yet.

Serious?

There'll be plenty
of other guys with

expressive eyes and
wonderful senses of humor.

But with me, the
brain-- The brain

comes first. I'm sorry, Gidget.

It's not too late
to ask someone else.

You're breaking the date
for the dance?

Cut it clean.
It's the only way.

Believe me, it's better.

Oh, well, I like that.

Or do I?

You did it? How?
Tell me. What did he say?

Why didn't you call and tell
me? Larue, it's done. Forget it!

Was he destroyed?
Come on. Give!

Did he throw himself
at your feet? Larue!

I told you about
the time with my

Uncle Morton and the bum check.

That's our family's
darkest secret.

Okay.
He took it fine.

As a matter of fact,
he broke the date.

He broke the date?

- Well, I was going to.
- Yeah, but--

But I was just
doing it so carefully

to be sure not to
shatter his ego--

Well, he thought
I was getting serious.

I guess it is
kind of funny.

Well, what's so funny
is that you're bugged.

Bugged? About being
turned down by Durf the Drag?

You mean you don't
suddenly find him

just the teensiest
bit attractive?

- Attractive? Durf the--
- [Durf] Surf?

Durf the Surf.
Is that catchy enough?

What are you trying to catch?
Cute, cute.

Oh, I just thought old
Deke Masters had

that class presidency sewn up
long enough.

- "Vote for Durf the Surf."
- What's that?

My petition. It's too late
to file for the election,

but if I can just get
200 signatures--

I'll sign it. What are you
doing? What happened to you?

Aw. You still feel sore
about the other night.

Feelings of rejection.
I dig.

Believe me, I dig.
But it's all past.

It is?
I'll sign.

Larue, we're talking. I'm
not rejected, just curious.

What's this "that's
all past" business?

Well, I figured if a girl like
you was crazy about me--

- I'm not.
- Mom was worried about you.

But she was pretty excited. Kept

calling me her
late-blooming Valentino.

- But she's funny that way.
- I bet.

And she bought me
all these new clothes.

I'd like to sign
it. Really. Larue!

And she told me
about my Uncle Ralph.

He's the one in brains.
Been married four times.

F-O-U-R. For the first time,
when he was 35.

Is that a pussycat?

No, thank you. I've
already decided on my vote.

Oh.
We'll be friends some day.

It takes time.

I never noticed his eyes
were violet before.

Yeah, they're blue and

bloodshot. That
makes 'em purple.

Oh, that conceited--
Shh!

Here come the meow twins.
[purrs]

Oh, hi, Gidge.

Oh, hi, Shar.
Mar.

Say hello, Lar.

King's "X"
for 30 seconds.

Just got the word
that Durf's running

against Deke for
class president.

So?

So I thought you might like to
double to the Spinsters Hop.

- Doubling?
- Yeah.

You and Durf and me and Deke.
The candidates and their girls.

- Oh, it'll be kicky.
- Gidget doesn't wanna double.

Besides--
We'd love to.

With Durf?
Who else?

Swell. I thought you might
be afraid of the competition.

Hardly anyone ever wants
to double with me.

Isn't that silly?
I would say so, yes.

You see? And you thought
she'd be afraid to lose him.

- Durf the Drag?
- No, Durf the Surf.

I gotta give you credit,
Gidge. I mean,

who else would have
figured that underneath

all that hair was,
ooh, such a doll?

And that he has violet eyes.

Listen, honey,
those violet eyes of

his got bloodshot
from staring at me.

Well, then it's a date?

And, uh, may the best
candidate win.

I've created a monster.

And now I've got to
uncreate him! But how?

I'm afraid that
throughout literature,

monster creators have been

destroyed by
their own creations.

Take Frankenstein. I'd
love to. He won't go with me.

There are other boys.

If I don't show up
at that dance with Durf,

Shari Lou will find
out he broke the date

and laugh me clear
through to graduation.

How would she find out something
like that? Wiretapping.

Oh, you don't know her.
Lucky she's on America's side.

I wish there was something
I could do to help.

You could sign the papers.
Papers?

Yeah. I understand I'm
underage for the foreign legion.

There must be a solution
closer to home.

Believe me, there isn't
one deceitful, dirty,

conniving trick I haven't
already thought of.

There is the truth.
You could explain to Norman...

that he misunderstood you
the other evening.

That you were in fact
trying to break the date,

not trap him
into a teenage marriage.

He wouldn't listen. Since
his head got so swelled,

the distance from his ear
to his brain is in light years.

Then may I suggest that
you brood someplace else.

I'm expecting Chuck for a
tutoring session any minute.

[doorbell rings]

Oh, hi, Gadget.
How are you doing?

That bad?
Worse.

Anything I could do?
Like, uh, hittin'?

I need a date
for the Spinsters Hop.

Well, I sock
better than I rock,

but I cut a nice figure.

You mean you'd really take me?

Why not?
Oh, brother.

You'd do anything
to get a passing

grade from my
father, wouldn't you?

Right. Well, at
least you're honest,

which is more than I'd be
if I accepted the offer.

You mean
you're puttin' me down?

Well, let's put it this way.
I have somebody else in mind.

Then what's the hitch?

The hitch is he's in my mind,

but lately he's been
a little out of his.

[Gidget narrating] George
Bernard Shaw once said...

that youth was wasted
on the young.

Well, as far as I'm concerned,
my share is up for grabs.

Me for some marcelled,
light blue hair,

an old rocker,
and no boys to worry about.

Of course, there was the outside

chance that Daddy's
idea could work.

Did you ever dial
with crossed fingers?

Hello, Mrs. Durf ner?
This is Gidget.

Oh, I'm fine.
Yes, I, um--

I know Normy told you.

Listen, would you ask him
to stop by later?

Yes. I know I'll heal.

Yes, I'm young.

Listen, Mrs. Durf ner,
just ask him to stop by--

Oh, a regular Valentino.

Late bloomer, yeah.

Just like his uncle.
Late bloomer.

Mmm.
So is poison ivy.

The patio again? I told
you, Gidget, I'm not ready.

It's got nothing to do
with you personally.

All I want is just five minutes
of your gorgeous time.

Okay. Mom said
I owe you that much.

But remember, no crying.

Why torture yourself?

I don't believe you!
I just don't believe you!

I meant every word.
I've got years ahead of me.

No. I mean, the way
you're so different.

Well, let's say,
with your help and Mom's,

I'm scaling the pinnacle
of my potential.

I wonder if anyone ever

collaborated on
a monster before.

Oh, Gidget, you're hurt.
But you'll get over it.

[Chuck] Beyond a shadow of a doubt,

Chuck Batson will be the
West Coast's star quarterback.

What was that?

Now one with a
prepositional phrase.

[Chuck] Without Chuck Batson, the--

The team wouldn't
stand a chance.

Durf, I'm trying to talk
to you. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But that guy-- Who is
he? That's Chuck Batson.

Now listen.
He's Chuck Batson?

And he's talking like that
about himself?

No.
He's, uh-- Why?

Well, I never heard anything
like it in my whole life.

Really?

[Chuck] In spite of his good
looks and charming personality,

Chuck Batson don't--
doesn't show off.

He doesn't, huh? I never
heard anybody so conceited.

[Russ] Now read
this section. Oh.

You think so, huh? Well,
it's embarrassing to listen to.

Who does he think
he is? Maybe he's just

scaling the pinnacle
of his potential.

Oh, come on.
I--

- You mean I sound like that?
- Well, you're not from Brooklyn.

Oh, but the way
he praises himself,

like he was some gift to-- to--

To-- I do.

Oh, wow. Oh, gee,
you should've told me.

Would you have listened?

You could've written
it on my petition.

I don't know what happened to
me. I must've had moon stroke.

The other night, I
told you I'd never

been in a patio
with a girl before.

And then my mother with her late

bloomer jazz. I
guess I went into orbit.

Well, it could happen
to anybody.

- If you haven't asked anyone
else to the dance-- No.

I mean, if you
wouldn't mind going

with me after the
jerk I've been--

Well, let's just
look at it this way.

At least it gave
us all a chance to

notice that your
eyes are violet.

♪ [rock on radio]
♪ [humming]

The only way to start the day is

with a victory
dance, I always say.

That's not till tomorrow
night. This is just a warm-up.

I ought to be celebrating
myself. You know, at this point,

there is not one sentence
that Chuck cannot parse,

as long as he is the subject,
I mean.

I ought to thank you. Just
understanding the male ego.

Of course, it may
be a little difficult to

move Chuck out and
old Abe Lincoln back in.

What's that about
the male ego?

I had a good, long think
about it.

Well, look what happened
to Durf.

I mean, like he said,
he really went into orbit.

And the only thing
that forced him back

into the reentry was
another male ego.

Good old 6'1",
175 pounds.

He could've still been out
there with Mariner 7.

That's the male ego, huh?

Now don't get
yours all stirred up.

I'll do my best. But now that

you're in a good,
long think mood,

how about that inflated ego
that figures...

one invitation to a dance is
enough to cure a boy of shyness?

Well, that was--

And then gets so worried
about what she thinks...

somebody's going to think that
she decides to break that date.

And then--
Cut.

The point is made?

Check.

There are many differences
between boys and girls,

happily, but that
is not one of them.

You know, you're right.

When it comes
to the me of things,

it's-- It's everybody's dance.

Sort of--
Sort of ego--

A-go-go?