All language subtitles for Assisted Living s04e07 Making A Pitstop.eng

All right. I'm so excited, Mr.

Brent. Yeah. What are you doing?

I'm sending out a whole bunch of
refreshments that ain't nobody going to

For who?

For the new residents who may not like
their coffee black and who may want

chicken baked instead of smothered in a
whole bunch of gravy and who also may

just like... What would normal folks
like, Mr. Brent?

He'd be ridiculous.

Where do you say he coming from? He's
coming from sauteed...

Not to cheat Georgia, I think that's
what he said. Oh, where's he coming

He's not going to like none of that
unless he got fresh out of prison.

What is all of that? Okay, I got some
good old Keisha cakes.

Keisha? Yes, Keisha cakes is what those
are. These are green bean casserole dip,

bologna chips, and Spam balls.

Spam balls? You need to stop, Mr. Brown.
I've never heard of a spam box.

You put everything spam. It's a little
hot in here today.

Oh, I cranked the heat up because it's
cold outside. It's real cold. Oh, no

to do that, Mr. Brown. My hot flashes
are the cost of global warming.

I know you right there.

I'm coming.

Oh, well, that's our new resident.

Yes.

Hey, look at you looking like you
looking.

It's cold enough to make a grown man.

Shiver without shame.

Well, come on in. Shiver on in here.

Corbin, it's the new resident. Resident.

Yes, yes.

How are you doing, sir? I'm Corbin
Simmons.

Yeah, just call me Pit Stop. Okay.

I'm a retired trucker.

A retired trucker.

It's cold enough.

To make a snowman die from hypothermia.

This is my sister, River Small.

River Small, ain't nothing small about
us. Y 'all see anything?

We in the right place?

Yes, yes.

Pleasant days?

Yes. Pleasant days where everything
around here is pleasant. Yes.

I'm Cora Simmons. Welcome to Pleasant
Days.

Welcome to your new home. Thank you.

Oh, darling, I started going with the
wind, but I didn't play the maid.

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

You need anything?

We have nice refreshments over here if
you like. Oh, no, I'm not staying.

We got spam balls.

Uh -oh.

That's my favorite.

You got excited about the food. You
know, this place ain't half bad. It's

we ain't used to being around so many
old folks. Old folks.

Boy, that scared me.

And just enjoy yourself.

All the balls, all the spam balls. Yes,
yes.

Enjoy the balls. Thank you.

And the bologna chips.

Yes.

With angel eggs on them.

What kind of chips?

No matter what you do, I love you. No
matter where you go, I'm behind you for

sure. Always remember love, yeah.

We'll make it if we stay together.

Come on in and have a seat.

Have a seat over there.

Ain't nobody going to bite you.

Now, where are you looking?

Ah, there he is.

Our new member to the family.

I am Effie.

I don't think we look too much alike.

My brother, you don't see the
resemblance, eh?

Yeah, I do. Y 'all both got smokers,
too.

What? Hunt.

Hey, so you from, uh, you, I think they
say you're from Hoochie Coochie.

Not the Hoochie Coochie, uh, way up in
the mountains.

We learned to hunt.

Oh, you hunt.

What y 'all hunt? Dura, bison, humans?

They're mostly humans.

Oh, I'm kidding.

I ain't ever killed anybody.

I did have a girl try to kill me once.

Really? I still don't understand it.

I started dating her mother and the
chick went goofy.

I guess it ain't show fault that the
mama looked better than the daughter.

Exactly what I told her.

So do you still hunt?

No, the arthritis got to me. It froze up
my trigger finger.

Well,

my prey grabbed me. My partner grabbed
it and choked it to death and skinned

that coon, and we ate it that night.

Messed with the wrong guy.

Oh, you're a redneck cannibal.

Mr. Brown, he's talking about raccoons.

Well, I'm supposed to know raccoons. He
didn't say raccoons.

Well, how was your drive coming up, Mr.
Pitstop?

You know where I can get some real food,
Mr.

Disco Ball?

Because you're shady.

Are you talking to me?

Every time I look at you, I get a
toothache.

I'm surprised you've got enough tooth to
make an ache.

It's a porn fix.

You're talking about somebody. You don't
talk to me.

He's just trying to show himself
friendly. It's okay.

Whatever.

Mr. Pitstop, what do you have in mind?
Maybe I can whip something up for you.

Well, you look like you could come up
with some southern fried chicken, uh,

Fluffy.

What did he say? He said, look like you
come up with southern fried chicken,

Fluffy.

So what is that supposed to mean? I
don't know what that means. No, no, no.

Well, that's what you mean. He's just
trying to show himself friendly.

You all wound up like that.

That rope that we used to use to lasso
cattle with. Oh.

Hey, are those pork rinds? Yes, barbecue
flavor.

You got some hot sauce?

You see?

We can be the same brother for my
daughter's mother.

Yes, I've been getting your text.

All 12 of them.

Okay, look, just me and me out front
before class, and I'll have it then.

All right.

Hey, son.

You got up early?

Yeah, I'm just finishing this paper.

You got another one?

Right? Teachers keep assigning homework
like we have nothing better to do at

home.

Well, what's this one about?

Oh, it's a persuasive essay on whether
reality TV is giving teens a false sense

of reality.

Well, you believe that it is, right?

What? I learned most of my life from
reality shows.

What have you learned on reality shows?

That they're real.

Like, remember when J .C.

ripped that girl's wig off and her
eyelashes on Peyton Hip Hop?

Just taught me, see what a girl really
looks like.

Oh, Lord.

Where did we go wrong?

Well, I'm proud of you, son, for
knocking your work out, all right?

Good job.

More like it's knocking me out.

I didn't get no sleep last night.

We didn't get any sleep either. We sure
didn't.

That's nasty.

When you go home from school, take you a
nice little nap.

I can't. Tutoring some kids after school
today.

Look at you.

Is this a pay key?

Well, it depends.

I have three fees. One for fine, one for
super fine, and one for I can't believe

you're even asking me.

Today I'm doing Sheila Shopshire here.
She gets a 99 .999 % discount.

You know what I mean?

Somebody left this on the printer.

An essay on technology's influence on
the stupidity of man by Freddie... Yeah,

that's mine. You know, teachers lift up
the papers or whatever. They have 180

students and you think they know who's
who, right? Okay, you guys have a good

one.

You too.

I'm calling Miss John.

Whoa. Mm -hmm.

Actin' weird.

Yeah. Sheila Shopshire.

Nothing I have to say.

Wow.

What do we have here?

We, as in not you, have black eyed peas,
collards, fried chicken, hot water

cornbread, and seven uptake.

Well, can I get a little shot? You might
pull back in love.

And this here's worth a fight.

We're introducing Pit Stop to the
soulful side. Yeah, did you know all

that high blood pressure diet?

No, it ain't no high blood pressure
diet. My grandmother put Lord in her

and she out -lived Methuselah.

Hey, Nate, like this is the last coon I
skipped.

La Foon.

But I'm going to need you to put the rye
on the cone.

That's too close that you're coming up
with it.

Okay, here you go, Mr.

Pitstop. I have the paperwork for you. I
need you to initial here, and I need

you to sign there and there.

Yeah, when you sign, you will officially
be one of us.

What, black?

He said black.

I'll get the door.

Okay, you got it? Are you okay, Pitstop?
Yeah, yeah, I'm all right.

I'm sorry. It's just sometimes my hand
sees something.

I can't hold on to things. Well, that's
okay. No need to apologize.

You know what? You got it?

Yeah. Right there. Right there.

Help me. And I think I got something
that can relieve that for you.

Right. Let me go get it right quick. You
got it? Yeah. There you go. Thank you.

You know, my third husband suffered with
arthritis in the most unusual areas.

Stiff joints can have some advantages.

Yeah, just hold it on there. That'd be
better.

Look who came back.

You're being unreasonable.

You back for more spam balls, little
small? Where's my daddy?

He would be the one right here. We call
her green juice, flipping down his chin.

Daddy, pack up.

You ain't spending the rest of your life
with these black -eyed peas.

You about to give me a heart attack.

Nobody asked me permission to throw you
in a home with fossils.

Who are you calling fossils?

You better watch it. I had Cora to take
you outside and punch you in the throat.

My money's on her.

Your knuckles are bigger than mine.

I've got a hundred shares of redneck
crypto on that one.

I'm taking you, Mr. Pitstop's daughter,
for a welcome pleasant day.

Well, everything's pleasant until
somebody like you come in.

Well, I ain't here for no pleasantries.

Daddy, let's go.

You ain't never been comfortable with
these black -eyed peas.

So I don't normally like to get into
family business.

Then don't.

I'm going to have to lay my Bible on the
shelf, Mr. Branson.

We're going to have to talk it out.

In private.

In private.

I don't think that's how cute.

Is this your idea of private?

Well, it is when you own every square
inch of the place.

It's going to take a minute.

This corn bear is called by name.

He liked the corn bear.

Kelly was upset that I found a nice home
for him.

No, Kelly was upset because nobody asked
me nothing.

I dropped by your house and it was as
clean as a chicken coop a day after the

slaughter.

How dare you rant up here with all your
hogwash, Kelly?

Your father's shack was run down so much
that it made the outhouse look good.

And you don't.

ever call on him.

Unless it's two days after you hear an
emergency vehicle go down the road.

That's not true.

I go by one day after I hear sirens.

And you wouldn't even know it. I can't
buy my new house with the money he's

wasting here. Not if he did.

My brother was lonely and unhappy.

And now look at him.

I'm one of them.

Black?

Part of a family, Kelly.

Daddy, are you on something?

What did you people give him? Fossil
biscuits?

Oh, love.

A lot of love, Kelly.

That's what we do around here. It's up
to Pit Stop where he spends his latter

years.

Well, so are you coming home with me
now, Daddy?

Or continuing with your... Hmm.

Black -eyed peas.

Lord, help me out with more arthritis,
get me something I never tried before.

You know, now I'm getting ready to get
Mr. Brown into honky -tonk.

Yoo -hoo!

But don't count on me visiting you.

Unfortunately, I never did.

You mean to tell me that you want a day
here with a bunch of these loving

folks?

Come on.

It only makes sense, Kelly.

Oh, Daddy, they may be all smiles now,
but when that dies off, you're going to

be living under a whole new set of
rules.

I mean, you always taught us to be on
your own.

Well, I will give you that one.

Now, you put me in charge of your money,
and I am not going to let these people

just take it away.

These people?

I have gone ahead and put your assets on
hold.

Now, you've got three days to come to
your senses.

Keep your hands off my assets.

Don't really raise my face. Look, I got
your assets.

Oh, hey, Mr. Reginald.

Everything okay, son?

Yeah, just a little homework.

Writing under an alias, huh?

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, just like Shakespeare.

Whose tongue, so air, speaks both, not
truly speaks who speaks not truly lies.

Say what?

It means quit lying, son.

This paper says Freddy Fibbins.

What?

Dang, man.

She did my thing. We look the same, son.

You young man, I'm a retired judge. I
can smell a lie before it's told.

I had a friend who was failing once.

Asked for my help.

But he used me as a crutch and didn't
really want to learn.

So I stopped helping him.

You can lead a horse to water, but you
can't make him drink.

What? Your friend was a farmer?

No, uh, my friend didn't want to put in
the work.

Now, the best way for you to help Freddy
is make him do his own homework.

Hey, what y 'all doing up? It's after
midnight.

Ah, well, I was just answering nature's
call and found young Philip here dozing

off. Hey, I'm going to talk to your
teachers tomorrow about this homework.

All right, now this is enough for two
students.

I'll say.

Good night, Shakespeare.

Hey, Dad, you don't need to talk to the
teacher.

Remember that tutoring thing I told you
I was doing?

Yeah, your gig.

Yeah, actually one of the students I'm
tutoring is the principal's son.

You talking about the suburban kid that
thinks he's a gangster from the mean

streets of Lilburn?

Yep, yep, that's the one.

He actually paid me to write one of his
essays.

Son.

That's cheating.

He's the one that cheated, I didn't. He
paid for my services, so that's just

business. Philip, you can get kicked out
of school for this. Come on.

Not in this case.

I mean, his dad is the principal.

He wouldn't kick out his own son.

Yeah, well, I'm going to talk to him
first thing in the morning.

You can't do that.

Look, Freddie said if I don't write his
essays for him, he's going to get his

dad to kick me off the dean's list.

Son, you can't get kicked off the dean's
list.

All right?

Now I want you to give Freddie his money
back, trash those essays, and let him

deal with choosing to be dumb.

But if I...

He might rearrange my face. I mean, he
got the fake tattoos, arm sleeve. Look,

he's a real gangster.

I know.

From the mean streets of Little Bird.

I think he's going to be all right,
okay?

Now go to bed.

Well, if he does, at least I'll be well
rested.

Might help my recovery.

Man, you're a punk.

Kelly's always been my bullheaded child.

Yeah, she looked like she was
bullheaded.

Yeah, that's the way her mom and I
raised her.

I can understand that.

My father was the same way with me.

He made me study every black dynamite
movie.

He put me in karate, wrestling, boxing,
jiu -jitsu, street fighting,

and balanced it all out with ballet.

Well, ballet.

He wanted me to be flexible enough to
roundhouse kick a predator five times

before they blinked while doing a
pirouette.

I don't know. I just, I don't feel like
I can get through to him.

Well, Mr. Pitstop, it's your life.

It can be challenging to make a
transition in life. But Pitstop, what

seen here so far at Pleasant Days is who
we are.

Yep. What you see is what you get.

And I think you should just think about
it. What you really want.

I think I know what I really want.

Okay. What's that?

I want some more of them greens.

All right, all right.

I'll call my bank and get my daughter
off my account.

Yeah. Is this me?

You're a part of us now?

You all had me at barbecued pork rinds.

Well, welcome.

Well, welcome to the family.

When you're here, you've got to learn
something.

You heard me what I'm saying, you know
what I mean?

You heard me?

You got some brother in you.

Welcome, welcome.

Okay, give me a honky -tonk lesson.

Okay,

every time I get near her, she scoots.

Yeah, every time I get near her, my moon
will let me near her boots.

Every time she scoots.

I'm near her boots.

Come on, you try it, Mr. Brown. Every
time I'm near her, she scoots. Every

I'm near her, she scoots.

She won't let me knock them boots.

Bring it back.

Every time I'm near her, she scoots. She
scoots and scoots. She won't ever let

me knock them boots.

You got it.

Every time I'm near her, she scoots.

I know that honky dog.

She won't.

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