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You unlock this door
with the key of imagination.
4
00:00:09,728 --> 00:00:12,062
Beyond it is another dimension-
5
00:00:12,097 --> 00:00:13,313
a dimension of sound,
6
00:00:13,982 --> 00:00:15,815
a dimension of sight,
7
00:00:15,850 --> 00:00:18,318
a dimension of mind.
8
00:00:18,353 --> 00:00:21,454
You're moving into a land
of both shadow and substance,
9
00:00:21,489 --> 00:00:23,323
of things and ideas.
10
00:00:23,358 --> 00:00:26,459
You've just crossed over
into the twilight zone.
11
00:00:48,481 --> 00:00:50,350
Whoa.
12
00:01:30,640 --> 00:01:31,891
What's your
pleasure, sir?
13
00:01:31,926 --> 00:01:33,143
Cold beer.
14
00:01:33,178 --> 00:01:35,645
Cold beer, she is.
15
00:01:41,284 --> 00:01:43,153
That'll be a nickel.
16
00:01:46,289 --> 00:01:48,158
It's a lovely
little town.
17
00:01:48,792 --> 00:01:50,043
What's that?
18
00:01:50,078 --> 00:01:53,163
I was just remarking
about your town.
19
00:01:53,198 --> 00:01:57,550
It's a beautiful, peaceful
little place you've got here.
20
00:01:57,585 --> 00:02:01,921
It's the name
that really gets me.
21
00:02:01,956 --> 00:02:03,807
Happiness, arizona.
22
00:02:03,842 --> 00:02:06,926
Yeah, that's what
she's called-
23
00:02:07,560 --> 00:02:09,429
happiness, arizona.
24
00:02:09,464 --> 00:02:11,931
Let's see, she's
been called that
25
00:02:11,966 --> 00:02:13,817
about ten
months now.
26
00:02:13,852 --> 00:02:16,319
Oh! What was she called
before that?
27
00:02:16,354 --> 00:02:17,570
Called before that?
28
00:02:17,605 --> 00:02:18,822
Oh, various things.
29
00:02:18,857 --> 00:02:20,690
Satan's stage stop.
30
00:02:20,725 --> 00:02:21,941
Dead man's junction.
31
00:02:21,976 --> 00:02:24,444
Boothill village-
you passed it.
32
00:02:24,479 --> 00:02:25,695
Boothill
town cemetery.
33
00:02:25,730 --> 00:02:27,580
128 people
buried there.
34
00:02:27,615 --> 00:02:30,083
Every one of them
shot to death
35
00:02:30,118 --> 00:02:32,585
except one who died
of natural causes.
36
00:02:32,620 --> 00:02:33,837
Well, that's life.
37
00:02:33,872 --> 00:02:36,956
Ah, this town wasn't
a fit place to live in.
38
00:02:36,991 --> 00:02:38,208
Wasn't a night
39
00:02:38,243 --> 00:02:40,710
you wouldn't have to
step over a dead body.
40
00:02:40,745 --> 00:02:41,961
That a fact?
41
00:02:41,996 --> 00:02:43,847
All of them shooting
every night.
42
00:02:43,882 --> 00:02:46,349
There were more citizens
biting the dust
43
00:02:46,384 --> 00:02:48,852
than there was attending
sunday services.
44
00:02:48,887 --> 00:02:50,720
Ah, do tell.
45
00:02:50,755 --> 00:02:53,223
And then, do you know
what happened?
46
00:02:53,258 --> 00:02:55,108
I can't even
begin to guess.
47
00:02:55,143 --> 00:02:57,610
Exactly- town took
stock of itself.
48
00:02:58,228 --> 00:03:00,113
Got itself
a real effective sheriff.
49
00:03:00,148 --> 00:03:01,981
Put the kibosh on firearms.
50
00:03:02,016 --> 00:03:05,118
Built itself a jail and
a gallows, enforced the law.
51
00:03:05,153 --> 00:03:06,369
Next thing you know...
52
00:03:06,986 --> 00:03:09,489
happiness, arizona!
53
00:03:09,524 --> 00:03:11,991
Where a man can walk
down the street
54
00:03:12,026 --> 00:03:13,243
and have himself a drink
55
00:03:13,278 --> 00:03:15,745
without having
to check the mirror
56
00:03:15,780 --> 00:03:18,248
and see who's
gunning after him.
57
00:03:18,283 --> 00:03:20,133
Now, that's
progress, mister.
58
00:03:20,168 --> 00:03:22,001
Well, it's
this kind of thing
59
00:03:22,036 --> 00:03:24,504
that kind of brings
tears to my eyes.
60
00:03:24,539 --> 00:03:27,006
Oh, now, you don't
have to be scared
61
00:03:27,041 --> 00:03:28,892
to show any
emotion, sir.
62
00:03:28,927 --> 00:03:30,143
I know the feeling.
63
00:03:30,178 --> 00:03:33,263
Been living with
killing and violence
64
00:03:33,298 --> 00:03:35,765
all your life,
and then suddenly
65
00:03:35,800 --> 00:03:37,016
it's kind of like...
66
00:03:37,051 --> 00:03:40,770
it's kind of like the sun
coming over a dark cloud
67
00:03:40,805 --> 00:03:44,524
and shining on you with its
warm rays of beneficence.
68
00:03:44,559 --> 00:03:47,660
I do a little preaching
on the side too.
69
00:03:47,695 --> 00:03:48,912
What's your line, sir?
70
00:03:48,947 --> 00:03:50,163
My... my line?
71
00:03:50,198 --> 00:03:51,414
What do you do?
72
00:03:52,031 --> 00:03:54,534
I'm on the road a
good deal of the time.
73
00:03:54,569 --> 00:03:55,785
Selling!
74
00:03:55,820 --> 00:03:57,670
In a manner of speaking.
75
00:03:57,705 --> 00:04:00,173
Services are my supply.
76
00:04:00,208 --> 00:04:00,790
Services?
77
00:04:00,825 --> 00:04:03,293
Well, what sort
of services?
78
00:04:03,328 --> 00:04:06,429
Maybe i can
throw a little
business your way.
79
00:04:06,464 --> 00:04:07,680
You might at that.
80
00:04:07,715 --> 00:04:10,183
This is a town
that could use me.
81
00:04:10,218 --> 00:04:11,434
What sort
of services
82
00:04:11,469 --> 00:04:12,685
you supplying?
83
00:04:12,720 --> 00:04:14,938
I bring back the dead.
84
00:04:19,309 --> 00:04:22,445
Introducing mr. Jared garrity,
a gentleman of commerce
85
00:04:22,480 --> 00:04:26,199
who in the latter half of the
19th century plied his trade
86
00:04:26,234 --> 00:04:28,067
in the wild and
wooly hinterlands
87
00:04:28,102 --> 00:04:29,702
of the american west.
88
00:04:29,737 --> 00:04:31,571
And mr. Garrity,
if one can believe him,
89
00:04:31,606 --> 00:04:34,707
is a resurrector of the dead,
which on the face of it
90
00:04:35,325 --> 00:04:37,827
certainly sounds like the bull
is off the nickel.
91
00:04:37,862 --> 00:04:39,712
But to the scoffers
amongst you,
92
00:04:39,747 --> 00:04:42,215
and you ladies and gentlemen
from missouri,
93
00:04:42,250 --> 00:04:44,083
don't laugh this one
off entirely,
94
00:04:44,118 --> 00:04:47,837
at least until you've seen
a sample of mr. Garrity's wares
95
00:04:47,872 --> 00:04:50,340
and an example of his services.
96
00:04:50,375 --> 00:04:52,225
The place is happiness, arizona,
97
00:04:52,260 --> 00:04:54,093
the time about 1890,
98
00:04:54,128 --> 00:04:57,847
and you and i have just entered
a saloon where the bar whiskey
99
00:04:57,882 --> 00:05:00,984
is brewed, bottled and delivered
from the twilight zone.
100
00:05:23,873 --> 00:05:25,124
What'd he say
his name was?
101
00:05:25,159 --> 00:05:26,376
He didn't say.
102
00:05:26,411 --> 00:05:28,878
He's got a sign
on his wagon.
103
00:05:28,913 --> 00:05:29,879
It says garrity.
104
00:05:29,914 --> 00:05:31,764
That could
be his name.
105
00:05:31,799 --> 00:05:33,132
By golly, that's
deduction.
106
00:05:33,167 --> 00:05:35,018
You know why we
got law and order
107
00:05:35,635 --> 00:05:36,269
in this town?
108
00:05:36,304 --> 00:05:38,137
Because we've
got a sheriff
109
00:05:38,172 --> 00:05:40,023
that uses scientific
deduction.
110
00:05:40,058 --> 00:05:41,641
I wish i'd thought of that.
111
00:05:41,676 --> 00:05:43,526
You know, if you don't know
a fella's name,
112
00:05:43,561 --> 00:05:45,395
you just look at his wagon.
113
00:05:45,430 --> 00:05:47,030
Well, now, that's really
no great shake
114
00:05:47,065 --> 00:05:48,281
of a deduction, lapham,
115
00:05:48,316 --> 00:05:50,149
but it does point up the fact
116
00:05:50,184 --> 00:05:52,035
you can't stop thinking
on this job.
117
00:05:52,070 --> 00:05:54,537
It's really kind of a think,
think, think proposition.
118
00:05:54,572 --> 00:05:57,657
Now some men depend on this
all the time
119
00:05:57,692 --> 00:06:00,159
when they should be using
the old... the old bean.
120
00:06:00,793 --> 00:06:02,795
By golly,
nobody could be righter.
121
00:06:02,830 --> 00:06:05,048
And when you use the head
instead of the gun,
122
00:06:05,083 --> 00:06:09,419
you save money on bullets
and burials and labor.
123
00:06:09,454 --> 00:06:12,555
Now he said what to you, jensen?
124
00:06:12,590 --> 00:06:15,058
Oh, he said he could
bring back the dead.
125
00:06:15,093 --> 00:06:17,176
Well, that's what he
said his line was-
126
00:06:17,211 --> 00:06:18,428
"bringing back the dead."
127
00:06:18,463 --> 00:06:20,930
Tell you, i almost
keeled back in my tracks.
128
00:06:20,965 --> 00:06:22,815
Bring back the
dead, i'm thinking.
129
00:06:22,850 --> 00:06:24,684
Well, he's
either a lunatic
130
00:06:24,719 --> 00:06:25,935
or he's trying
to gull me.
131
00:06:26,569 --> 00:06:28,571
That's when i ran
over to your office
132
00:06:28,606 --> 00:06:29,188
and got you, sheriff.
133
00:06:29,822 --> 00:06:31,691
Yeah, and when we come back,
he done and left town.
134
00:06:31,726 --> 00:06:34,193
He probably figured
you'd gone after the sheriff
135
00:06:34,228 --> 00:06:35,445
and decided to get out of town.
136
00:06:35,480 --> 00:06:37,697
By golly, that's good reasoning,
sheriff.
137
00:06:37,732 --> 00:06:39,582
That's just what he done.
138
00:06:39,617 --> 00:06:42,085
He's obviously some sort
of a con man.
139
00:06:42,120 --> 00:06:44,587
And when he saw jensen here
leave the saloon,
140
00:06:44,622 --> 00:06:46,456
he knew he was going
for the lawman.
141
00:06:47,090 --> 00:06:49,092
So, uh, he felt
he was in trouble,
142
00:06:49,127 --> 00:06:50,960
and he got out of town.
143
00:06:50,995 --> 00:06:54,097
Now that's a very fine
piece of deduction.
144
00:06:54,132 --> 00:06:58,468
Except hows come
he left his wagon?
145
00:06:58,503 --> 00:07:01,604
Gooberman, you're a very
embarrassing man to have around.
146
00:07:01,639 --> 00:07:03,856
Why do you want to ask a
question like that for?
147
00:07:03,891 --> 00:07:05,858
"Hows come he left his wagon?"
148
00:07:05,893 --> 00:07:07,727
"Hows come
he left his wagon?"
149
00:07:07,762 --> 00:07:10,863
How come he did leave his wagon?
150
00:07:10,898 --> 00:07:12,231
Sheriff?
151
00:07:12,266 --> 00:07:13,232
Way i figure it,
152
00:07:13,267 --> 00:07:15,118
he probably didn't get
out of town after all.
153
00:07:15,153 --> 00:07:16,369
The way i figure it,
154
00:07:16,986 --> 00:07:18,871
he probably checked into
the hotel or something.
155
00:07:18,906 --> 00:07:21,124
By golly, sheriff,
you're exactly right.
156
00:07:21,159 --> 00:07:22,375
That's just what he done.
157
00:07:22,410 --> 00:07:24,243
You've got a job here
for the rest of your life
158
00:07:24,278 --> 00:07:26,129
if i've got anything
to do with it.
159
00:07:26,164 --> 00:07:27,380
Jensen,
160
00:07:27,415 --> 00:07:29,499
give the sheriff
a drink on me.
161
00:07:29,534 --> 00:07:32,001
You're a real sport, lapham.
162
00:07:32,036 --> 00:07:33,886
That's real kind of you, lapham,
real kind of you.
163
00:07:33,921 --> 00:07:36,389
Real kind of you.
164
00:07:41,894 --> 00:07:44,764
Here's to lapham.
165
00:07:44,799 --> 00:07:46,015
Sheriff.
166
00:07:57,276 --> 00:07:59,779
You're, uh...
you're mr. Garrity?
167
00:07:59,814 --> 00:08:01,531
That's my family name.
168
00:08:01,566 --> 00:08:04,417
Is that your
wagon outside?
169
00:08:05,034 --> 00:08:06,285
Yep, that's
my wagon.
170
00:08:06,320 --> 00:08:08,171
Says garrity
on it?
171
00:08:08,206 --> 00:08:09,422
That's my
family name.
172
00:08:09,457 --> 00:08:11,290
Well, mr. Jensen
here says
173
00:08:11,325 --> 00:08:13,176
that you bring
back the dead.
174
00:08:13,211 --> 00:08:16,295
Now, that's a figure
of speech, ain't it?
175
00:08:16,330 --> 00:08:18,181
You don't actually
bring back the dead.
176
00:08:18,216 --> 00:08:23,803
On the contrary, that's exactly
what i do- bring back the dead.
177
00:08:23,838 --> 00:08:26,806
Well, now, you wouldn't
mind telling us
178
00:08:26,841 --> 00:08:29,308
how you go about
doing this, would you?
179
00:08:29,343 --> 00:08:31,811
Well, now, sheriff,
no offense-
180
00:08:31,846 --> 00:08:33,062
uh, bartender,
please-
181
00:08:33,097 --> 00:08:36,816
but it's kind of like a
professional trade secret
182
00:08:36,851 --> 00:08:38,701
kind of like a magician.
183
00:08:38,736 --> 00:08:41,821
Now, he doesn't tell
how he does his tricks
184
00:08:41,856 --> 00:08:44,957
and i don't tell how i
bring back the dead...
185
00:08:44,992 --> 00:08:46,209
but i do.
186
00:08:46,244 --> 00:08:49,212
The fact is,
i heard about
your town here.
187
00:08:49,247 --> 00:08:52,465
128 dead in boothill
up there.
188
00:08:52,500 --> 00:08:53,966
Happiness, arizona,
189
00:08:54,001 --> 00:08:57,720
with the biggest cemetery
west of chicago
190
00:08:57,755 --> 00:09:00,840
and all of them
departing the earth
191
00:09:00,875 --> 00:09:03,342
with unspeakable
violence.
192
00:09:03,377 --> 00:09:05,228
All but one.
193
00:09:05,263 --> 00:09:07,730
And that was my
dear wife, zelda,
194
00:09:07,765 --> 00:09:10,233
rest her soul.
195
00:09:10,268 --> 00:09:15,488
A fine healthy strapping
woman of 247 pounds,
196
00:09:15,523 --> 00:09:19,859
but not unattractive, mind you,
197
00:09:19,894 --> 00:09:22,995
and suddenly
i lost her.
198
00:09:23,362 --> 00:09:26,499
And that's
why i drink-
199
00:09:26,534 --> 00:09:29,619
from a
broken heart.
200
00:09:29,654 --> 00:09:34,006
How much loss
can a man stand?
201
00:10:00,783 --> 00:10:03,903
Killed him, poor little tyke,
ran right under my wagon.
202
00:10:03,938 --> 00:10:05,288
Must have struck him
alongside of the head.
203
00:10:05,323 --> 00:10:08,791
Hasn't got a mark on him,
but he's sure dead.
204
00:10:08,826 --> 00:10:11,410
Well, it's accidental
animal homicide.
205
00:10:11,445 --> 00:10:13,412
Well, that's decent
of you, sheriff.
206
00:10:13,447 --> 00:10:14,664
No fine or nothing?
207
00:10:14,699 --> 00:10:15,298
No fine.
208
00:10:15,915 --> 00:10:17,800
You obviously couldn't help it.
209
00:10:18,167 --> 00:10:20,670
Anybody know who
the dog belongs to?
210
00:10:20,705 --> 00:10:21,921
Stray is what it is.
211
00:10:21,956 --> 00:10:23,806
I never seen
it before.
212
00:10:23,841 --> 00:10:26,175
I'll take him out
and bury him.
213
00:10:26,210 --> 00:10:27,426
Ladies and gentlemen!
214
00:10:27,461 --> 00:10:29,929
The proof of the pudding
is in the eating
215
00:10:29,964 --> 00:10:33,065
and the proof of the service
is in the performing.
216
00:10:33,100 --> 00:10:34,934
Hallelujah!
217
00:10:34,969 --> 00:10:38,070
Now that dog is certainly
dead, is it not?
218
00:10:39,357 --> 00:10:41,824
And gentlemen,
i shall return it
219
00:10:41,859 --> 00:10:43,693
to the land of
the living.
220
00:10:43,728 --> 00:10:45,578
I shall resurrect
that dog.
221
00:10:45,613 --> 00:10:48,698
Now, please, stand
back all of you.
222
00:10:48,733 --> 00:10:50,333
Oh, i want to ask you one thing.
223
00:10:50,368 --> 00:10:52,201
In order that i might
perform the operation
224
00:10:52,236 --> 00:10:53,452
completely and satisfactorily,
225
00:10:53,487 --> 00:10:55,955
would you all turn around so
that you're not watching me.
226
00:10:55,990 --> 00:10:59,342
If you don't
mind, please.
227
00:11:17,895 --> 00:11:19,111
Eureka!
228
00:11:19,729 --> 00:11:20,980
Oh, you good dog.
229
00:11:21,015 --> 00:11:22,365
Oh, you good dog!
230
00:11:22,400 --> 00:11:23,616
There we go.
231
00:11:24,984 --> 00:11:26,869
Look at him go!
232
00:11:31,741 --> 00:11:34,877
My dear friends,
ladies and gentlemen,
233
00:11:34,912 --> 00:11:37,997
citizenry of happiness, arizona,
234
00:11:38,032 --> 00:11:40,499
it is with no small
degree of pleasure
235
00:11:40,534 --> 00:11:42,385
that i stand here
236
00:11:42,420 --> 00:11:45,504
on this quaint
picturesque main street
237
00:11:45,539 --> 00:11:48,641
performing what i
might modestly claim
238
00:11:48,676 --> 00:11:51,143
as an accomplishment
of some dimension.
239
00:11:51,178 --> 00:11:52,395
As you have all seen,
240
00:11:53,012 --> 00:11:55,514
i have just brought
a dog back to life.
241
00:11:55,549 --> 00:11:56,899
It's devil's work!
242
00:11:57,266 --> 00:11:58,517
Black magic is what it is.
243
00:11:58,552 --> 00:12:01,654
It is not black magic
and not devil's work.
244
00:12:01,689 --> 00:12:04,774
It is the application
of scientific principles
245
00:12:04,809 --> 00:12:07,276
which i have picked up
over the years
246
00:12:07,311 --> 00:12:11,030
while traveling exclusively
in the himalayan mountains.
247
00:12:13,532 --> 00:12:16,669
What i did for that dog i can do
for your loved ones-
248
00:12:16,704 --> 00:12:19,171
may their souls rest in peace-
momentarily.
249
00:12:19,206 --> 00:12:23,542
You mean, you can bring
back my zelda?
250
00:12:23,577 --> 00:12:26,045
And my former partner?
251
00:12:26,080 --> 00:12:28,047
And my late husband?
252
00:12:28,082 --> 00:12:32,435
Tonight, dear friends,
tonight at midnight,
253
00:12:32,470 --> 00:12:36,806
happiness will reign
in happiness, arizona.
254
00:12:36,841 --> 00:12:39,942
The dead will be returned
to you.
255
00:13:08,721 --> 00:13:10,589
H-he's still up
at the cemetery.
256
00:13:10,624 --> 00:13:13,092
He's been there four hours now.
257
00:13:13,127 --> 00:13:14,977
That place freezes my
insides at high noon
258
00:13:15,012 --> 00:13:16,228
with the sun
shining down.
259
00:13:16,263 --> 00:13:18,097
Imagine how it
is after dark.
260
00:13:18,132 --> 00:13:19,982
I don't like
the proceedings.
261
00:13:20,017 --> 00:13:21,851
I believe when you're dead,
you're dead.
262
00:13:21,886 --> 00:13:24,987
Imagine my
little blossom,
263
00:13:25,022 --> 00:13:28,741
my own zelda.
264
00:13:28,776 --> 00:13:33,746
All those lonely days
and lonely weeks
265
00:13:33,781 --> 00:13:40,002
and tonight at midnight,
she comes back to me.
266
00:13:44,874 --> 00:13:46,759
Good evening,
gentlemen.
267
00:13:48,010 --> 00:13:51,130
Good evening
to you all.
268
00:13:53,015 --> 00:13:54,884
Whiskey, please.
269
00:13:57,386 --> 00:14:00,523
You know, the cosmic impulses
tonight are incredible.
270
00:14:00,558 --> 00:14:02,391
Absolutely incredible!
271
00:14:02,426 --> 00:14:04,276
I have just been up on boothill.
272
00:14:04,311 --> 00:14:06,145
All finished
up there now?
273
00:14:06,180 --> 00:14:07,396
All finished.
274
00:14:07,431 --> 00:14:11,150
Now they'll all come filing
down any moment now.
275
00:14:11,185 --> 00:14:13,035
Ahead of schedule, too.
276
00:14:13,070 --> 00:14:16,155
I hadn't gone five minutes
into the ceremony
277
00:14:16,190 --> 00:14:18,657
before the earth
started to heave.
278
00:14:18,692 --> 00:14:20,042
Some mighty anxious folks
up there.
279
00:14:20,077 --> 00:14:21,293
Mighty anxious.
280
00:14:21,328 --> 00:14:25,047
Ah, but it'd do your heart good
to see them wiggling around
281
00:14:25,082 --> 00:14:27,550
under the sod,
just like some happy colts
282
00:14:27,585 --> 00:14:29,418
raring to face life again.
283
00:14:34,924 --> 00:14:36,809
That's your beloved brother,
284
00:14:36,844 --> 00:14:37,676
isn't it,
mr. Jensen?
285
00:14:38,310 --> 00:14:40,813
Uh, john, he was killed
by accident last march.
286
00:14:40,848 --> 00:14:44,567
We had a gunfight in here and
he got hit by a stray bullet.
287
00:14:44,602 --> 00:14:46,435
The same size
and shape as you
288
00:14:46,470 --> 00:14:49,572
with a kind of a limp?
289
00:14:52,825 --> 00:14:54,076
Uh...
290
00:14:54,111 --> 00:14:56,579
how did you know?
291
00:14:56,614 --> 00:14:59,198
Your brother was the last man
buried, mr. Jensen,
292
00:14:59,233 --> 00:15:02,334
and the last buried
are the first ones
293
00:15:02,369 --> 00:15:04,203
who'll be coming back down.
294
00:15:04,238 --> 00:15:06,205
Coming back down?
295
00:15:08,090 --> 00:15:11,210
Ha! I believe
that's him coming now.
296
00:15:27,610 --> 00:15:30,112
Mr. Jensen...
297
00:15:30,147 --> 00:15:32,615
it's your own
beloved brother john
298
00:15:32,650 --> 00:15:35,117
and a more decent,
honorable citizen
299
00:15:35,152 --> 00:15:38,237
never pulled a cork
from a bottle,
so i'm told.
300
00:15:38,272 --> 00:15:41,373
Mr. Garrity, he was a
lowdown thieving skunk.
301
00:15:41,408 --> 00:15:44,493
He spent more time tapping
the till and stealing whiskey
302
00:15:44,528 --> 00:15:46,996
than he did
waiting on customers.
303
00:15:47,031 --> 00:15:47,880
You dishonor the man.
304
00:15:48,497 --> 00:15:51,000
And here he returns to you
from the grave.
305
00:15:51,035 --> 00:15:53,502
And after that unfortunate,
accidental bullet
306
00:15:53,537 --> 00:15:56,005
that caught him
between the shoulder blades.
307
00:15:56,505 --> 00:15:58,390
Mr. Garrity.
308
00:15:59,642 --> 00:16:00,893
What do you charge
309
00:16:00,928 --> 00:16:02,761
to bring back
these dead people?
310
00:16:02,796 --> 00:16:05,898
Room and board, but my
major source of income
311
00:16:05,933 --> 00:16:07,766
is the pleasure
i derive
312
00:16:07,801 --> 00:16:09,652
bringing happiness
to my fellow man.
313
00:16:09,687 --> 00:16:12,154
Well, how would you
like to increase
314
00:16:12,189 --> 00:16:13,405
that source of income?
315
00:16:14,023 --> 00:16:15,908
You'll have to speak
a bit plainer.
316
00:16:15,943 --> 00:16:18,410
What would it take to
put my brother back?
317
00:16:18,445 --> 00:16:20,913
No, that would be a
difficult procedure.
318
00:16:20,948 --> 00:16:22,164
You see, mr. Jensen,
319
00:16:22,199 --> 00:16:24,667
after the resurrection
has taken place
320
00:16:24,702 --> 00:16:26,535
it requires
a maximum effort
321
00:16:26,570 --> 00:16:28,420
to make them die
all over again.
322
00:16:28,455 --> 00:16:33,425
Well, would $100
help the effort?
323
00:16:33,460 --> 00:16:35,928
Shall we say $1,000?
324
00:16:35,963 --> 00:16:39,048
Well, what does
500 do for you?
325
00:16:39,083 --> 00:16:42,801
It warms me a little
but i still feel drafty.
326
00:16:42,836 --> 00:16:46,555
Let's settle for,
uh... 750, shall we?
327
00:16:46,590 --> 00:16:48,440
It's a deal.
328
00:17:06,208 --> 00:17:07,459
He disappeared!
329
00:17:07,494 --> 00:17:11,213
He just plain
disappeared!
330
00:17:11,248 --> 00:17:13,966
He came walking
towards us
331
00:17:14,001 --> 00:17:15,467
and i would
have bet money
332
00:17:15,502 --> 00:17:17,336
it was your
brother john.
333
00:17:17,371 --> 00:17:19,221
And he was walking
towards us
334
00:17:19,256 --> 00:17:21,090
and then he plumb
disappeared!
335
00:17:21,125 --> 00:17:22,341
That's life.
336
00:17:22,376 --> 00:17:24,226
But now don't
fret, friends.
337
00:17:24,261 --> 00:17:26,095
He'll be followed
by all the others.
338
00:17:26,130 --> 00:17:29,231
All the
others?
339
00:17:29,266 --> 00:17:30,733
Including your beloved wife.
340
00:17:30,768 --> 00:17:32,601
Your lonely hours are over.
341
00:17:32,636 --> 00:17:35,738
Your zelda will soon
be back with you
342
00:17:35,773 --> 00:17:38,240
to bring back
your peace of mind.
343
00:17:38,275 --> 00:17:40,743
No disrespect, uh...
344
00:17:40,778 --> 00:17:47,616
what i mean is that zelda was
the flower of all womanhood
345
00:17:47,651 --> 00:17:50,753
but on six different occasions
346
00:17:50,788 --> 00:17:57,626
she broke my left arm and
this poor thing was in a cast
347
00:17:57,661 --> 00:18:02,014
so many times that
i developed a list.
348
00:18:02,049 --> 00:18:05,134
Your point, mr. Gooberman.
349
00:18:05,169 --> 00:18:09,521
Oh, i would hate to
disturb zelda's rest
350
00:18:09,556 --> 00:18:14,526
so how much would it
cost to put her back?
351
00:18:14,561 --> 00:18:18,897
Oh, that's a difficult
assignment, mr. Gooberman.
352
00:18:19,531 --> 00:18:20,783
Uh...
353
00:18:20,818 --> 00:18:22,034
$500.
354
00:18:22,069 --> 00:18:23,902
For me it was $750!
355
00:18:25,939 --> 00:18:26,538
I'm
ashamed.
356
00:18:26,573 --> 00:18:28,407
I'm truly
ashamed.
357
00:18:28,442 --> 00:18:30,292
Your own
dear brother.
358
00:18:30,327 --> 00:18:33,412
And you, gooberman,
your dear wife.
359
00:18:33,662 --> 00:18:37,416
As a public official of this
town, i apologize for these men.
360
00:18:37,451 --> 00:18:39,301
I am humiliated.
361
00:18:39,336 --> 00:18:41,170
Nothing less than humiliated!
362
00:18:41,670 --> 00:18:43,555
I don't blame you
a bit, sheriff.
363
00:18:43,590 --> 00:18:46,058
And i could perceive immediately
364
00:18:46,093 --> 00:18:48,560
that you're made of
sterner stuff.
365
00:18:48,595 --> 00:18:50,429
You're not quaking
in your boots
366
00:18:50,464 --> 00:18:52,314
because lightning
peterson
367
00:18:52,349 --> 00:18:56,068
will be one of the departed
returning this night.
368
00:18:56,103 --> 00:18:57,319
Lightning
peterson!
369
00:18:57,354 --> 00:18:59,188
You killed
him yourself,
370
00:18:59,223 --> 00:19:00,439
didn't you,
sheriff?
371
00:19:00,474 --> 00:19:01,690
He was the
fastest gun
372
00:19:01,725 --> 00:19:02,941
in the
territory.
373
00:19:02,976 --> 00:19:04,193
Balderdash.
374
00:19:04,228 --> 00:19:05,444
I say balderdash!
375
00:19:05,479 --> 00:19:07,329
"Lightning" peterson.
376
00:19:07,364 --> 00:19:10,449
You killed him once, sheriff,
in an honest showdown
377
00:19:10,699 --> 00:19:12,584
and if he hasn't
learned from that
378
00:19:12,619 --> 00:19:14,453
well, you can do it again.
379
00:19:16,955 --> 00:19:18,207
Something, sheriff?
380
00:19:18,242 --> 00:19:20,709
You're going to resurrect
that gunman?
381
00:19:20,744 --> 00:19:23,212
Well, it was a
mass operation.
382
00:19:23,247 --> 00:19:25,097
As a matter of fact, sheriff,
383
00:19:25,132 --> 00:19:28,217
it will give you
a marvelous opportunity
384
00:19:28,252 --> 00:19:30,719
to dispel those
ugly rumors i heard
385
00:19:30,754 --> 00:19:33,856
that you actually shot
peterson in the back...
386
00:19:34,473 --> 00:19:36,358
late at night...
387
00:19:36,393 --> 00:19:38,227
when he was alone and unarmed
388
00:19:38,262 --> 00:19:41,980
and you had six deputies
alongside of you.
389
00:19:42,015 --> 00:19:43,232
Seven.
390
00:19:43,267 --> 00:19:46,368
Now, i know that you faced up
to him in broad daylight
391
00:19:46,403 --> 00:19:50,122
but this will give you an
opportunity to shoot him down,
392
00:19:50,157 --> 00:19:51,373
if need be, face-to-face.
393
00:19:51,408 --> 00:19:54,493
Well, now, the fact
is, mr. Garrity,
394
00:19:54,528 --> 00:19:58,247
i don't think that peterson
should be resurrected.
395
00:19:59,248 --> 00:20:00,499
Actually...
396
00:20:00,534 --> 00:20:03,385
he's a menace to society.
397
00:20:03,420 --> 00:20:05,254
The fact is,
sheriff...
398
00:20:07,756 --> 00:20:09,641
...he's already
on his way down.
399
00:20:09,676 --> 00:20:12,144
I don't mind
facing up to him
400
00:20:12,179 --> 00:20:14,646
but why go to all
that trouble?
401
00:20:14,681 --> 00:20:16,515
Uh...
402
00:20:16,550 --> 00:20:18,400
would, uh,
you think $500
403
00:20:18,435 --> 00:20:20,269
would keep him
back up there?
404
00:20:20,304 --> 00:20:21,520
Lightning peterson?
405
00:20:21,555 --> 00:20:24,022
You do him an
injustice, sheriff.
406
00:20:24,057 --> 00:20:26,525
He was quite a lad
with the gun
407
00:20:26,560 --> 00:20:28,410
and mighty
active at that.
408
00:20:28,445 --> 00:20:30,913
No, no, no, this will
be a $1,200 job.
409
00:20:30,948 --> 00:20:32,164
Sold.
410
00:20:32,199 --> 00:20:34,666
Jensen,
a whole bottle please.
411
00:20:34,701 --> 00:20:36,535
Happen to see a scrawny
little man out there,
412
00:20:36,570 --> 00:20:38,420
kinda gimlet-eyed.
413
00:20:38,455 --> 00:20:39,671
His name?
414
00:20:39,706 --> 00:20:40,923
Perkins. Ephraim perkins.
415
00:20:40,958 --> 00:20:43,425
Relative?
Ex-husband.
416
00:20:43,460 --> 00:20:45,928
And no tighter man
ever squeezed a silver dollar.
417
00:20:45,963 --> 00:20:47,796
And the thing of it is,
i'm married again.
418
00:20:47,831 --> 00:20:49,047
And if the truth be known,
419
00:20:49,681 --> 00:20:52,184
i never did care for ephraim
while he was living
420
00:20:52,219 --> 00:20:54,686
and i don't see why i should
go through it all again.
421
00:20:54,721 --> 00:20:57,189
What would i do
with two husbands?
422
00:20:57,224 --> 00:20:58,440
A hundred dollars?
423
00:20:58,475 --> 00:20:59,691
Five, madam.
424
00:20:59,726 --> 00:21:02,811
Five?
Mm.
425
00:21:07,816 --> 00:21:09,067
My father-in-law...
426
00:21:09,102 --> 00:21:10,953
my father-in-law's
a big man,
427
00:21:10,988 --> 00:21:13,455
asked to be buried
with a bullwhip.
428
00:21:13,490 --> 00:21:14,706
There's just no reason
why he should...
429
00:21:14,741 --> 00:21:15,958
no, no, no.
430
00:21:15,993 --> 00:21:19,077
Oh, thank you,
thank you.
431
00:21:20,579 --> 00:21:22,965
My wife looked
very pretty
432
00:21:23,000 --> 00:21:24,216
when she was buried.
433
00:21:24,251 --> 00:21:26,718
Couldn't we keep
her that way?
434
00:21:26,753 --> 00:21:29,221
Five.
435
00:21:29,256 --> 00:21:32,341
The rest of you just
put your names here.
436
00:21:32,376 --> 00:21:33,592
The amount's $500.
437
00:21:33,627 --> 00:21:34,843
Thank you.
438
00:21:34,878 --> 00:21:37,346
Five.
439
00:21:45,604 --> 00:21:47,489
Whoa.
440
00:21:52,494 --> 00:21:53,862
Come on, boy!
441
00:21:53,897 --> 00:21:55,747
Come on, spot, come on!
442
00:21:56,400 --> 00:21:58,867
Come on, spot, come here!
443
00:22:00,153 --> 00:22:02,004
Oh, you nice, nice puppy.
444
00:22:02,039 --> 00:22:03,872
Oh, you're a nice dog.
445
00:22:03,907 --> 00:22:06,375
I got a big bone
in the wagon for you.
446
00:22:06,410 --> 00:22:08,260
Your reward for playing dead.
447
00:22:08,295 --> 00:22:08,877
You're late!
448
00:22:08,912 --> 00:22:10,762
Oh, ace,
i couldn't help it.
449
00:22:10,797 --> 00:22:13,131
This town is the ripest pear
we ever plucked.
450
00:22:13,166 --> 00:22:15,017
They couldn't
get rid of their
moneybags fast enough.
451
00:22:15,052 --> 00:22:16,268
What was the take?
452
00:22:16,303 --> 00:22:20,639
Considerably more than you
earned on the stage, dear boy.
453
00:22:20,674 --> 00:22:22,774
Played my part uncommonly well.
454
00:22:22,809 --> 00:22:23,775
Uncommonly.
455
00:22:23,810 --> 00:22:26,278
I've been checking over
the itinerary.
456
00:22:26,313 --> 00:22:27,529
Our next stop is tucson.
457
00:22:27,564 --> 00:22:29,398
We'll get a good night's sleep,
458
00:22:29,433 --> 00:22:33,151
you go in there in the morning,
get a line on the place.
459
00:22:33,186 --> 00:22:34,786
We'll see which
of the dear departed
460
00:22:34,821 --> 00:22:36,655
you can imitate
tomorrow night.
461
00:22:41,910 --> 00:22:43,161
Real sorry, friends,
462
00:22:43,196 --> 00:22:46,048
that i couldn't perform
what i laid claim to,
463
00:22:46,665 --> 00:22:50,552
so rest in peace, all of you.
464
00:22:52,421 --> 00:22:54,923
Let's go.
465
00:22:54,958 --> 00:22:58,060
Old spot, now
come on over here.
466
00:22:58,095 --> 00:22:59,311
There you go.
467
00:22:59,346 --> 00:23:00,562
You sit here.
468
00:23:36,848 --> 00:23:39,968
The man don't do
himself justice.
469
00:23:40,003 --> 00:23:44,356
The actor that played you
wasn't worth a darn.
470
00:23:44,391 --> 00:23:46,224
But that there garrity
471
00:23:46,259 --> 00:23:49,361
sure can do a job
of resurrecting.
472
00:23:49,396 --> 00:23:52,481
I can't wait to get
back into town.
473
00:23:52,516 --> 00:23:56,234
I've got a lot of drinking
to catch up with.
474
00:23:56,269 --> 00:23:58,120
There's a yellow skunk
of a sheriff
475
00:23:58,155 --> 00:23:59,988
i aim to settle
a score with, too.
476
00:24:00,023 --> 00:24:01,873
And there's a little pipsqueak
477
00:24:01,908 --> 00:24:04,376
of a sot just waiting
to get his arm broke
478
00:24:04,411 --> 00:24:06,878
and i'm just the gal
that can do it
479
00:24:06,913 --> 00:24:08,747
or my name
ain't zelda gooberman.
480
00:24:08,782 --> 00:24:11,633
Exit mr. Garrity,
a would-be charlatan,
481
00:24:11,668 --> 00:24:13,502
a make-believe con man
482
00:24:13,537 --> 00:24:16,004
and a sad misjudger
of his own talents.
483
00:24:16,039 --> 00:24:19,141
Respectfully submitted
from an empty cemetery
484
00:24:19,176 --> 00:24:21,643
on a dark hillside
485
00:24:21,678 --> 00:24:25,397
that is one of the slopes
leading to the twilight zone.
486
00:24:28,316 --> 00:24:29,267
And now, mr. Serling.
487
00:24:29,302 --> 00:24:31,770
The subject next time
is automation.
488
00:24:31,805 --> 00:24:33,021
Our area of concern:
489
00:24:33,056 --> 00:24:34,906
The replacement of men
by machines.
490
00:24:34,941 --> 00:24:37,409
It happens to be not only a
current industrial phenomenon
491
00:24:37,444 --> 00:24:39,277
but potentially
a sizable can of peas,
492
00:24:39,312 --> 00:24:40,529
that, once opened,
carries with it
493
00:24:40,564 --> 00:24:42,414
some very special
story material.
494
00:24:43,031 --> 00:24:45,534
Onthe twilight zonenext time,
we open that can of peas
495
00:24:45,569 --> 00:24:48,036
and present a battle between
the men and the machines.
496
00:24:48,071 --> 00:24:50,539
Richard deacon and paul newlan
star in
497
00:24:50,574 --> 00:24:53,041
"the brain center at whipple's."
498
00:24:54,041 --> 00:25:04,041
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