All language subtitles for The Scotts s03e06.eng

If I decided the West End hadn't seen
the last of Bonnie Scott, would you be

there by my side?

I've been offered a job.

London. That's amazing!

I wish I could get married.

Will you?

Don't get your ass, your niece.

No point there's going to be. What's
your secret, Laura?

I don't want to live in this house
anymore.

Because it's at the knees.

I show my world.

We need all else.

And dowels and dwangs.

What are dwangs?

He, he, he!

Another 400 quid at the back, Ben!

Darren's finally accepted me refusing
his proposal.

But I want to show him that this dream
wedding isn't just pie in the sky.

Right.

These are my counts.

Oh, no.

Squares with numbers in them.

No, look.

See this number here?

Aye. That's 10 % of what I earned last
month.

Going straight into your wedding fund.

Is it?

We'll get there, Darren.

Month by month.

Imagine a royal wedding.

Add strobe lights, a bouncy castle and a
van that does candy floss.

I don't day sums, but I know that had a
lot of months.

I think you start thinking about this
charity night.

Which charity night?

Mind Niamh's wee boy was in hospital
with pneumonia.

Aye. He's fine now, but as you know.
Aye, in a pain in the arse.

But Niamh asked me to MC a charity night
for the children's hospital.

I said MC, I'll do the lot.

You'll be brilliant at that.

I know.

So I'm thinking, charity ball, dinner
suits, gowns, and we'll have a Kelly.

Oh, yes.

Now I know this isn't meant to be about
me, but I want people saying I cannae

believe how much money that collect
Scott raised for that hospital.

Aye. More than Lin Weir ever did at her
charity, right?

Well, it's not competition.

Of course.

Of course, it's about the wins.

Lin Weir couldnae raise a stoner at a
Viagra party.

Henry and I haven't discussed what I
said about moving to a new house.

There's enough upheaval going on as it
is.

Jason's away this week.

Oh, the baby of the family is leaving
home.

I'm the baby of the family.

He's older than me.

So let's try and get everything boxed up
by Friday.

Why are you taking all your posters?

Well, I need my posters. These are like
50 % of my personality.

It won't be his room anymore without his
posters.

That was the first poster you ever had.

We got it at the carnival and I pinned
it up for you.

Weird knock -off Spider -Man.

Do you want me to leave that here?

Nah. I want Spidey looking after you in
your new place.

I want every bit of balled up, crunchy,
spunky toilet paper out of that room

before I come in to help.

I already got rid of him for you.

Mum!

Michael Ball.

A gorgeous genius.

phoned me with a huge opportunity.

Vonnie, he said, there is a solo dance
number in our new show that just needs

the tender touch of the terror of Soho.

Bastards!

Bastards!

Come on, you're untying my cheer.

So, I call him back and wait till you
hear this.

He said that the team want me to fly
down to show them what I can do.

It's not an offer, Vincent.

It's an audition.

You?

Vonnie Scott?

Audition? Exactly! Audition! Me! Moi!

I'll volley that Michael Ball straight
into the tap corner, telling me, stick

it. Well, there's no satisfaction in
telling someone to stick a job that you

don't actually have yet.

You know what the Vonnie Scott play
would be?

What? Do the audition.

Show them that you've still got it.

And when they offer you the job... Then
tell them to stick it.

You know me so well!

Now where are my goddamn tattoos?

And so it's arrived.

Moving out day.

Now that Jason's moving all these weird
wee men out of the house, it actually

feels real.

Listen, they weird wee men put down the
rebellion of the heretic Warmaster

Horace. I'll have you know.

That's my bro.

We're not doing melancholy today.

It's a positive step for Jason and we're
going to be happy and excited and

supportive and... Jason, you keep
stopping. It's literally too long to get

the bend.

How do you think people get couches into
flats? Do people in flats just sit on

the carpet?

Henry, we're not doing this today.

I said I want things to be wholesome
like the great pottery throwdown.

It'll be the great Jason throwdown in
the stairs in a minute.

If the angle's too tight, lift it up.
I'm lifting it up higher.

Higher. Can I just put it down a minute?
My arms are killing me.

Oh, Jason, we've only just... All right,
put it down.

You're doing brilliantly, Jason.

Isn't he Henry?

Oh, superb.

I think we should start a removals
company together.

Two lovely men removals, we'll call it.

Heartwarming, Henry, and he's lovely.

Grafter Boy Removal Company Limited.

Jet down, blow them all away, tell
Michael Ball where to stick it and then

back up the road ready to be a baller at
the charity ball.

Well, that's a long way to go for an act
of sheer pettiness.

I know.

And it's absolutely delicious.

Now, how come I'm carrying... Why am I
carrying boxes and you're just...

...wrestling?

Is that about right?

Higher?

Right,

come on, we'll get a quick photo. Come
on, quickly.

Yay!

What are you doing?

What are you doing?

I hope you don't think that when I talk
about doing things I've never done

before, moving house, that I regret
anything.

I don't.

I've loved every minute I've spent with
them and with you.

I know.

I know.

But let's promise that we're going to
make the second part of our adventure as

amazing as the first.

Aye.

Listen unto me.

Talk about tile, grout and dills.

For another 40 year.

It'll be incredible.

Henry, promise.

Listen.

Henry and Laura.

Part two.

Five stars on a poster.

I promise.

I promise too.

But if you could throw in a bit of
spontaneity here and there too then.

not go crazy then.

Let's not go daft to it.

Seriously? Pull my body!

That's it!

Yes!

Yes! Woo!

Do you know what I call a exercise, by
the way?

What? Pulling my plonker?

Men bonded in muscle, mate.

Vincent, I was in and out of foster
homes when I was wee.

I didn't know that.

A lot of quiet bedrooms and time on my
own.

Sorry to hear that, man.

That's why I love this family.

It's just so alive.

I cannae wait to marry Colette in many,
many months.

Yeah. Well, it's not a plus side, right?

By the time you two get married, you'll
be able to have your reception on the

moon. Well, even if I'm old and grey by
the time it finally happens, I'm going

to be so honoured to be a Scot.

Aye, but Colette will take your name,
you dafty.

Oh, aye.

Right enough.

Colette Stoner McGregor.

Why do you take my horn off your peck
now?

Oh, sorry.

Back to the bands.

Let's do it.

Drag me to hell!

Doctor says my fatty liver is starting
to reverse.

Beep, beep, beep.

This fatty liver is reversing.

Top of the world, so am.

Right.

Let's get this show on the road.

Let's hope the money comes in now.

So when you can sit down your back,
darling.

Here comes the money.

We know the best looking family about by
the road.

Hey, hey, who's this guy?

Laura bought me that jacket for
Christmas one year.

Total beamer.

Never wore it.

But I've made that promise now, so this
is for her.

Yeah, Laura, what have you done to my
brother?

Don't you think you've got Marty Pelt in
that jacket?

Feel it in my fingers.

I feel it in my toes.

I feel it in my trousers.

That's when my willy grows.

Yeah, Ronnie, Ronnie, come here.

Feel her, Jake.

There.

Ah.

I don't know if Mark Haley was coming.

Quiet. I'm really looking forward to
hearing you sing later.

Are you?

You look gorgeous, Lana.

Ah, thank you.

Tenor in the collection bucket for
compliments.

Come on, get your purse empty ten.

Henry, see, Laura Wright, she knows that
you look like a big velvet

couch that go up and walk to a big bed
knobs and broomsticks bastard.

But this is an emotional day for yous
too and she just wants to make sure yous

feel loved.

Bed knobs and broomsticks?

Listen, be honest with me, Henry Wright.

Do you think that Vonnie has my back the
same way that Laura has yours?

Oh, look at that, Henry.

Evening sponsored by Vincent Scott Endy.

And very handsome, too.

Oh.

Aye, look at that big Vincent, eh?

Don't see your name up there, Henry.

I donated some of the raffle prizes.

You've won a bag of shark sand.

Oh, don't take that, Henry.

I feel free to sponsor a table or two.

Right, put Henry Scott's scaffolder down
for a couple of tables.

Anything he denies,

Vincent Scott, MD,

will double it.

I know how to play them as one another,
but I need more.

I've no seen you put anything in that
charity bucket yet, Mammy. You've got my

ticket money.

What mer do you want?

Quite right, Moira.

I'm only here cos charity and I've got a
hooch in my kind -hearted books.

Shooting fish in a barrel.

Charity begins at home, I say.

Hear, hear.

Raising money for sick wins.

What about the blind?

What about you?

There's another windfall.

Wayne.

Going to spend the money on anything
worthwhile.

Lego. Shite.

What would you spend your money on?

Well, Moira, let's just say,

you can just not Lego from a stripper's
belly.

That guy is disgusting.

Ladies and gentlemen, are you ready for
Star Time?

Please listen to the stage, your folks,
for this evening.

Collect Scott!

Money, money, money, ah.

Money, money, ah.

In a rich metal world.

Come on, it's not funny. Get your horns
in your pockets.

Get that money in the bucket.

Orange 225.

This is a fix, by the way.

Get that rattled in the bucket,
Margaret.

Yes, it's for the wings.

You'll only spend it in scratch car
pens.

For a dinner date with Ronnie Scott.

Lily, that's been two months since
Darren left you for your sister.

Time to get back on the horse, darling.

1 .50.

And we're off!

Ah, she'll be playing blind man's buff
tonight.

I'll be the blind man.

She'll be in the buff.

Right, Mum.

Get your Kaley trainers on.

Band are setting up.

Henry's been good to me wearing the
jacket, so I'll be good to him and not

him to dance. He hates Kayleigh dancing.

Take your partners for a gay garden!

Hi, Laura.

You can come up and dance with me, since
we're both no old boring boys won't be

getting up.

Sit down, Vincent.

This is Henry and Laura, part two.

I'll be doing every Kayleigh dance
tonight.

Sorry, Vincent.

Did you see the way he stopped Vincent
there?

I think I just had my nobody -puts -baby
-in -a -corner moment.

Social dancing is literally my worst
nightmare. You couldn't pay me to get up

there.

Hi, Jason.

You fancy a gay Gordon?

Absolutely.

Off the plane, quick change in the
toilets.

Cinderella, you shall go to the charity
ball.

Wow.

Scotland's most desirable couple
reunited, Jason Donovan and Kayleigh

How'd it go?

Well, I danced my arse off and the
bastards offered me the job.

Of course.

And what did Michael Bauheed say when
you told him he'd piss off?

Ladies and gentlemen, take your partners
and come on the dance floor for the

Arcadian Strip the Willow.

Come on.

Laura! Bonnie, you look gorgeous.

I'm still catching my breath. I thought
I'd last one.

This dance is hardcore.

You're going to die.

Bonnie, what did Michael Bourgeois say
when you told him to piss off? Just save

your breath, the dance.

What did he say, Bonnie?

I didn't tell him to piss off.

I took the job.

Shock twist.

Yeah, right.

Don't people know who I am?

What I love.

What I have dreamed of for years since
my greatest failure.

Aaron's right.

As stubborn as Henry can be, the truth
is he does always put me first.

Like Danny's a cool turning jock for
Sandy.

That is lovely.

I'm going to check.

So you're leaving for London?

I need it.

How long?

Six months now.

What about your school?

We'll cross that bridge.

Once we come to it. Well, we're at the
bridge, Bonnie.

Have a bit to jump half it.

I'll be back.

Well, you can... Off with that.

We'll love you and you'll die there.

You've been keeping us here, right,
Vincent?

Right, Vincent?

Look what I won in the raffle.

There's a cracking pool table coming up
next in the charity auction.

Dad always said he'd put one in my room
when I left home.

You should bet.

That's right.

These are going to... Probably not. Your
dad doesn't want to.

Mum, it's Dad.

He'll go wherever you want to go.

Thanks.

And back to the auction for the final
item of the night.

An American pool table.

Ten pound.

You can put that in here, aren't you?

A tenner?

For a pool table?

Yeah, if you're not...

That's it too, Hannah.

200 pounds!

Cracking night, Collette.

How much do you think you've raised?

We might just make 5 ,000.

5 ,000?

So what's up with you?

I wanted to do a lot better.

I feel like I've let them do.

Oh,

shut up, Collette.

What? How much did you think you were
going to raise millions?

No.

Aye.

Nothing's good enough for you.

I'd get high expectations.

Your house isn't good enough.

You're no good enough.

And your songs aren't good enough. It's
you that said that, actually.

And then there's Darren.

What about Darren?

It doesn't get much better than that
boy, then.

It doesn't.

I know that.

You'll not marry him because you don't
have this and you don't have that.

But I need to.

Don't need anything, hen.

Can you not see what you've already got?

Vincent.

Don't you dare.

Vincent.

If it is about the business, then Ailey
can hold the fort when we're away.

It's no about the bloody business.

I'm no going to London, all right?

No.

Oui, Vincent, says no.

This is a shot at redemption for me.

It is meant to be, and I need you there
to support me.

Well, you support me.

Know the time, pal.

I support you. I always support you.

What support me like, oh, Vonnie, I'm
worried I might be dying.

Maybe we can live a healthier lifestyle.

Vonnie says no. That's not no. Support
me like, oh, Vonnie, I think maybe

actually I would love to have a win.
Vonnie says no. Hey!

You stood at Laura's door and you
promised me that if I ever wanted to do

that you would be there.

Nothing keeping us here, she says.

Nothing.

I didn't mean nothing.

I made one promise to you that matters,
Vonnie, right?

When you were down in London that first
time, miserable, by the way, I promised

you a better life.

And look!

A beautiful family.

The best family, by the way, that loves
you.

There's my promise, Vonnie.

Fulfilled.

There's your nothing.

If I don't go... If I don't go

to London for this, then how do I...
Finish my story!

Tell me that the Vonnie Scott comeback
is not the big finale.

Oh, this is a finale, all right.

Give me regards to Broadway, Vonnie.

What the hell am I doing?

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Sorry for interrupting the music, but
there's something I've got to do.

Darren, can you come here a wee moment?

It's fine. It's okay.

It's all right.

You make these plans.

You've got to take life as it comes.

Then know when a moment is right.

Darren Bruce Lee.

Bruce Lee?

His name's Bruce Lee?

Mate, the slaggings we've been missing
out on.

Love of my full life.

Will you marry me?

Aye.

One thing.

Can I take your name?

What?

My family name means nothing to me.

But Scott, that name, your name,

Bree's name, can I be that as well?

My God, of course you can!

I'm going to be a Scott!

Yeah!

Aw.

I mean, as if I'd ever be taking a guy's
name anyway.

No.

So we wake up the next morning and we
are the only two people who live in our

house. Get yourself ready.

I'm taking you somewhere nice.

Are we going for a walk?

Kinda.

Now you watch yourself, Slippy.

So, I'm thinking You'd maybe want a
living room here What?

In my new pool table In the games room
Maybe here

Henry, are you gonna build it for how?

I'm not gonna build it We're gonna build
it Together A wee adventure

I mean, can we?

Is the land for sale?

Well, no anymore.

I hope this wasn't too spontaneous for
you, but... I've already bought it.

Oh, no!

I mean, if this is, like, a really
stupid idea... No, no, no, no, it's an

amazing idea.

I mean, do you really want to do that?

I love building stuff.

I don't know why I didn't think of it
before.

Here we are.

I'm excited.

It's alright.

I want something like that.

The big massive one.

I like that one.

Is that the one you want? I don't want
it.

I'm so excited.

Oh, I love you.

Right, so it's these guys or these guys.
These are my guys. These are your guys.

So you've got your 12 days.

Right, okay.

Killed all my wee guys. Well done.

Well done.

But me next.

Right, I'm going to win.

So the living room will start here,
right?

Yep.

So this is all... No, this is kitchen.

Kitchen.

Aye, nose, cheeky, cheeky chin.

Cheeky, cheeky chin, nose.

Aye.

Five -minute call, Mrs Scott.

Five -minute call.

When your belly's rumbling down my
phone.

When you ask for bread and get a phone.

When you feel like you're wrong.

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