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1
00:00:02,170 --> 00:00:03,871
Just a little bit more.
Okay, all right.
2
00:00:03,904 --> 00:00:05,239
A little bit more.
And...
3
00:00:05,273 --> 00:00:06,707
Surprise!
Oh.
4
00:00:06,740 --> 00:00:07,708
Yep.
Oh.
5
00:00:07,741 --> 00:00:10,144
Say hello
to the Revelation 3000,
6
00:00:10,178 --> 00:00:12,813
the most advanced smart fridge
on the market.
7
00:00:12,846 --> 00:00:14,148
Something tells me
we can't afford
8
00:00:14,182 --> 00:00:16,150
to see Diana Ross
at Pechanga anymore.
9
00:00:16,184 --> 00:00:18,186
Ooh, here's the best part.
You ready?
10
00:00:18,219 --> 00:00:19,353
Hello, Bridget.
11
00:00:19,387 --> 00:00:21,322
Bridget:
Hello, how can I help?
Oh.
12
00:00:21,355 --> 00:00:23,357
[ Chuckles ] Bridget is
the A.I. assistant
13
00:00:23,391 --> 00:00:24,725
that will help
organize our groceries
14
00:00:24,758 --> 00:00:26,026
and our lives.
15
00:00:26,060 --> 00:00:28,329
[ Sighs ]
She's already created me
a playlist,
16
00:00:28,362 --> 00:00:29,497
she's synced my calendars,
17
00:00:29,530 --> 00:00:31,199
she created a celebrity
gossip alert...
18
00:00:31,232 --> 00:00:32,766
Ohh!
Speaking of gossip --
19
00:00:32,800 --> 00:00:33,867
Mm!
20
00:00:33,901 --> 00:00:35,269
Did you hear about
Pepper and Ronaldo?
21
00:00:35,303 --> 00:00:36,504
No, what?
22
00:00:36,537 --> 00:00:38,539
Word is,
they recently invited
23
00:00:38,572 --> 00:00:40,708
a third party
into their relationship.
[ Gasps ]
24
00:00:40,741 --> 00:00:43,344
Who is he?
You mean,
who is she.
25
00:00:43,377 --> 00:00:44,945
Yeah! Yeah.
[ Gasps ]
26
00:00:44,978 --> 00:00:46,847
How?! I didn't even know
they knew any women!
27
00:00:46,880 --> 00:00:49,049
Apparently, they met her on
an experimental dating site
28
00:00:49,083 --> 00:00:51,018
called
"Let's Just See What Happens."
29
00:00:51,051 --> 00:00:52,186
[ Refrigerator chimes ]
30
00:00:52,220 --> 00:00:53,454
Oh, oh, that's me.
Oh!
31
00:00:53,487 --> 00:00:54,522
Oh, I gotta run.
32
00:00:54,555 --> 00:00:56,257
I got back-to-back
meetings today
33
00:00:56,290 --> 00:00:58,025
and then I got
a team dinner tonight.
34
00:00:58,058 --> 00:00:59,360
Cam, no you --
Another one?
35
00:00:59,393 --> 00:01:00,528
That's your third one
this week.
Yeah.
36
00:01:00,561 --> 00:01:01,762
[ Door closes ]
37
00:01:01,795 --> 00:01:04,598
I also have a busy day,
thank you for asking.
38
00:01:04,632 --> 00:01:05,899
Busy day?
39
00:01:05,933 --> 00:01:07,201
Would it be helpful
40
00:01:07,235 --> 00:01:09,237
if I ordered some of
your favorite groceries?
41
00:01:09,270 --> 00:01:11,705
You -- You can do that?
42
00:01:11,739 --> 00:01:13,207
Thank you...
43
00:01:13,241 --> 00:01:14,408
Bridget.
44
00:01:14,442 --> 00:01:15,943
Thank you, Bridget.
45
00:01:15,976 --> 00:01:18,078
Did I hear you say
you need more pepper?
46
00:01:18,112 --> 00:01:20,114
Oh, no,
Pepper's just a friend.
47
00:01:20,148 --> 00:01:22,616
And if Cam wasn't in such a rush
to get out of here,
48
00:01:22,650 --> 00:01:25,986
we'd be talking about what
an insane thing he's doing.
49
00:01:26,019 --> 00:01:28,822
Almost as insane
as talking to an appliance.
50
00:01:28,856 --> 00:01:30,924
You mentioned a third party?
51
00:01:32,460 --> 00:01:35,329
Yeah, honestly,
who just meets someone online
52
00:01:35,363 --> 00:01:37,898
and then invites them
into their house?
53
00:01:37,931 --> 00:01:40,901
-- Captions by VITAC --
54
00:01:40,934 --> 00:01:43,904
Captioning Provided by
20th Century Fox Television
and ABC, Inc.
55
00:01:43,937 --> 00:01:46,907
and brought to you by Ford.
Going further, so you can.
56
00:01:46,940 --> 00:01:49,009
**
57
00:01:51,712 --> 00:01:53,814
...and then I would
show the client
58
00:01:53,847 --> 00:01:55,683
comparable sales
from the past year.
Hmm.
59
00:01:55,716 --> 00:01:58,586
The assignment was to present
a compelling sales pitch,
60
00:01:58,619 --> 00:02:01,589
not bore me with endless
real-estate clichés.
61
00:02:01,622 --> 00:02:03,324
What gives, Mrs...
62
00:02:03,357 --> 00:02:04,792
Mrs. Pritchett?
63
00:02:04,825 --> 00:02:06,927
Oh, I didn't...
64
00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:08,762
What would you...?
65
00:02:08,796 --> 00:02:10,264
[ Babbling ]
66
00:02:10,298 --> 00:02:13,367
I'm sorry, are -- are --
are those sentences?
67
00:02:13,401 --> 00:02:14,635
Why so harsh?
68
00:02:14,668 --> 00:02:17,938
Because Gloria's gift
is that special.
69
00:02:17,971 --> 00:02:20,941
A generational
real-estate talent.
70
00:02:20,974 --> 00:02:22,443
I have to push her that hard.
71
00:02:22,476 --> 00:02:25,112
She wants me to.
All the great ones do.
72
00:02:25,145 --> 00:02:28,782
[ Crying ]
Phil is so mean to me.
73
00:02:28,816 --> 00:02:30,951
Health and Safety Code 17926.
74
00:02:30,984 --> 00:02:32,320
Carbon monoxide alarm!
75
00:02:32,353 --> 00:02:34,121
Government Code 12955.
76
00:02:34,154 --> 00:02:35,556
Multi-family dwellings!
77
00:02:35,589 --> 00:02:37,525
Civil Code 1101.1.
78
00:02:37,558 --> 00:02:38,826
Plumbing!
79
00:02:38,859 --> 00:02:40,494
No, fixtures!
80
00:02:40,528 --> 00:02:42,062
Wait, it's --
You're dragging.
81
00:02:42,095 --> 00:02:43,531
Ooh, I know it!
Libby, go!
82
00:02:43,564 --> 00:02:46,133
Civil Code 1101.1 requires
plumbing re-installment
83
00:02:46,166 --> 00:02:48,669
of all residential properties
built before 1994.
84
00:02:48,702 --> 00:02:49,803
Yes!
85
00:02:49,837 --> 00:02:51,705
Someone is
paying attention.
86
00:02:51,739 --> 00:02:52,806
It's hard not to.
87
00:02:52,840 --> 00:02:54,141
Your rap-lectures
on property codes
88
00:02:54,174 --> 00:02:55,843
are both informative
and funky.
89
00:02:55,876 --> 00:02:57,878
Oh, I noticed
that you lost your mug,
90
00:02:57,911 --> 00:03:00,013
so I just went ahead,
got you a new one.
91
00:03:00,047 --> 00:03:01,382
Plastic?
92
00:03:01,415 --> 00:03:03,484
She must hate
the sea turtles.
93
00:03:03,517 --> 00:03:05,353
"State's
Greatest Teacher."
94
00:03:05,386 --> 00:03:07,355
I was gonna get you one
that said "World's Greatest,"
95
00:03:07,388 --> 00:03:09,089
but I didn't want
to look like a suck-up.
96
00:03:09,122 --> 00:03:10,190
Too late, nerd.
97
00:03:10,224 --> 00:03:12,993
Mrs. Pritchett,
respect the classroom.
98
00:03:13,026 --> 00:03:15,663
All outbursts should be couched
in a fake cough.
99
00:03:15,696 --> 00:03:20,033
Okay, before we break for lunch,
uh, just a brief reminder --
100
00:03:20,067 --> 00:03:22,370
I will be rewarding
this quarter's top student
101
00:03:22,403 --> 00:03:25,373
with an unpaid,
uncredited internship.
102
00:03:25,406 --> 00:03:26,740
Yes!
103
00:03:26,774 --> 00:03:29,843
I'll tally final grades
and post the winner tomorrow.
104
00:03:29,877 --> 00:03:32,179
[ Coughing ]
Who cares!
Thank you, Ike.
105
00:03:32,212 --> 00:03:34,348
As a boss,
I have to be kept in the loop
106
00:03:34,382 --> 00:03:36,584
on several different projects
at a time.
107
00:03:36,617 --> 00:03:37,585
Oh, my gosh.
108
00:03:37,618 --> 00:03:39,687
Am I saying "in the loop"
too much?
109
00:03:39,720 --> 00:03:41,088
No, our readers
are gonna love you.
110
00:03:41,121 --> 00:03:42,089
Oh, great. Good.
111
00:03:42,122 --> 00:03:43,391
Let's see, you said
112
00:03:43,424 --> 00:03:45,693
your daughter's doing research
in Antarctica.
113
00:03:45,726 --> 00:03:46,860
Yes.
114
00:03:46,894 --> 00:03:48,362
Any chance we could meet
the rest of the clan?
115
00:03:48,396 --> 00:03:50,230
[ Chuckles ] Um...
116
00:03:50,264 --> 00:03:51,565
Hell, no.
117
00:03:51,599 --> 00:03:54,568
This was for the cover
of Corner Office Magazine.
118
00:03:54,602 --> 00:03:57,938
I mean, that's basically Vogue
for female CEOs.
119
00:03:57,971 --> 00:04:00,107
Lately, my family has seemed
more suited
120
00:04:00,140 --> 00:04:02,276
to a gator-farm billboard.
121
00:04:02,310 --> 00:04:04,445
[ Babies crying ]
* Camptown ladies
sing this song *
122
00:04:04,478 --> 00:04:06,280
* Doo-dah, doo-dah...
123
00:04:06,314 --> 00:04:08,482
Ugh, this usually
makes them sleep.
124
00:04:08,516 --> 00:04:10,651
Babies.
125
00:04:10,684 --> 00:04:12,820
Babies.
126
00:04:12,853 --> 00:04:14,422
[ Crying stops ]
127
00:04:15,623 --> 00:04:17,325
Oh, my God,
it worked.
128
00:04:17,358 --> 00:04:19,660
Yeah, a little trick I learned
doing the 4:00 a.m. feeding.
129
00:04:19,693 --> 00:04:22,663
Oh, you don't have to do that,
they're not your babies.
130
00:04:22,696 --> 00:04:24,231
Why isn't Mom helping?
131
00:04:24,264 --> 00:04:25,833
You know, I actually
don't mind staying up.
132
00:04:25,866 --> 00:04:28,168
I've been watching marathons
of "Snapped."
133
00:04:28,201 --> 00:04:32,005
It's a show about women
driven to violent crime.
134
00:04:32,039 --> 00:04:33,907
I probably like it
'cause I know
135
00:04:33,941 --> 00:04:35,409
I have nothing to worry about
when it comes to --
136
00:04:35,443 --> 00:04:36,410
[ Claire yells ]
Oh!
137
00:04:36,444 --> 00:04:37,578
Ahh!
138
00:04:37,611 --> 00:04:38,579
[ Coughs ]
Dad!
139
00:04:38,612 --> 00:04:39,513
Honey.
[ Babies crying ]
140
00:04:39,547 --> 00:04:40,748
Ugh...
141
00:04:40,781 --> 00:04:42,650
* Camptown races
sing this song -- *
142
00:04:42,683 --> 00:04:44,452
Stop, stop, stop.
I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.
143
00:04:44,485 --> 00:04:45,753
I-I'm not feeling well.
144
00:04:45,786 --> 00:04:47,254
You guys are gonna have to go
to Disneyland without me.
145
00:04:47,287 --> 00:04:48,322
Are you sure?
Honey...
146
00:04:48,356 --> 00:04:50,090
Yeah, absolutely.
You should hit the road.
147
00:04:50,123 --> 00:04:51,091
[ Coughs ]
148
00:04:51,124 --> 00:04:52,793
Phil,
don't be late for work.
149
00:04:52,826 --> 00:04:54,428
Yeah, you don't want
to catch this!
Bye.
150
00:04:54,462 --> 00:04:57,097
Bye.
No, no, no, no, no!
151
00:04:57,130 --> 00:04:58,632
Okay.
152
00:04:59,800 --> 00:05:00,934
[ Camera shutter clicking ]
153
00:05:00,968 --> 00:05:02,936
You know,
if you wanted a different angle,
154
00:05:02,970 --> 00:05:05,606
we could, uh, go over
to the chess board here.
155
00:05:05,639 --> 00:05:09,276
I'm playing remotely
with a Russian grand master.
156
00:05:09,309 --> 00:05:10,277
[ Camera shutter clicking ]
157
00:05:10,310 --> 00:05:11,612
[ Footsteps approaching ]
158
00:05:11,645 --> 00:05:12,613
E-- Um...
159
00:05:12,646 --> 00:05:15,683
Excuse me
just one second.
160
00:05:16,584 --> 00:05:19,286
[ Door opens ]
161
00:05:19,319 --> 00:05:20,621
Hey!
162
00:05:20,654 --> 00:05:22,289
What are you two lovebirds
doing here?
163
00:05:22,322 --> 00:05:24,291
I thought you were sleeping over
at Janice's.
164
00:05:24,324 --> 00:05:25,693
It got too hard
for us to be there.
165
00:05:25,726 --> 00:05:27,127
Yeah.
You know,
in the silence.
166
00:05:27,160 --> 00:05:29,663
My daughter just went away
for college.
167
00:05:29,697 --> 00:05:31,231
We're empty nesters now.
168
00:05:31,264 --> 00:05:32,633
Everything in that house
169
00:05:32,666 --> 00:05:34,134
is just another reminder
of our little girl.
[ Crying ]
170
00:05:34,167 --> 00:05:38,071
You've known her for
four months, but, um, yeah.
171
00:05:38,105 --> 00:05:39,907
Oh, look at that,
Phil left his helmet.
172
00:05:39,940 --> 00:05:41,375
He's been biking
to campus.
173
00:05:41,409 --> 00:05:43,076
Campus!
[ Crying ] Oh, God!
174
00:05:43,110 --> 00:05:44,878
[ Sobbing ]
Okay, listen.
175
00:05:44,912 --> 00:05:47,815
You have to go give this
to your dad right now.
176
00:05:47,848 --> 00:05:48,916
Right, right, right now.
Uh --
177
00:05:48,949 --> 00:05:49,983
No time to waste,
okay?
Okay.
178
00:05:50,017 --> 00:05:51,018
And, Janice --
179
00:05:51,051 --> 00:05:52,853
Hey, honey,
let's get you dressed
180
00:05:52,886 --> 00:05:54,922
so that you can quietly
see yourself out.
181
00:05:54,955 --> 00:05:56,023
Okay?
182
00:05:56,056 --> 00:05:58,058
I was really hoping
to get some juice.
183
00:05:58,091 --> 00:06:00,193
Juice is terrible for you.
You know what?
184
00:06:00,227 --> 00:06:01,194
Water.
185
00:06:01,228 --> 00:06:02,730
[ Water bottle thuds ]
186
00:06:02,763 --> 00:06:04,164
Oh, my God.
187
00:06:04,197 --> 00:06:09,069
All right, then, time for my
lecture on geological surveys.
188
00:06:09,102 --> 00:06:11,539
[ Beatboxing ]
189
00:06:11,572 --> 00:06:13,273
Uh, Mr. Dunphy?
190
00:06:13,306 --> 00:06:14,842
Bedrock --
I'm sorry.
191
00:06:14,875 --> 00:06:17,277
Should we wait for Libby?
She's not back from lunch yet.
192
00:06:17,310 --> 00:06:19,012
Yeah, I heard she was
riding her bike
193
00:06:19,046 --> 00:06:20,013
and then
got hit by a car.
194
00:06:20,047 --> 00:06:21,181
Been taken
to the hospital.
195
00:06:21,214 --> 00:06:23,684
What?! That's terrible.
I hope she's okay.
196
00:06:23,717 --> 00:06:26,987
Yes, she should be
more careful.
197
00:06:28,388 --> 00:06:30,424
In the crime show
I've been bingeing,
198
00:06:30,458 --> 00:06:34,094
9 out of 10 female suspects
casually file their nails
199
00:06:34,127 --> 00:06:35,896
during police questioning.
200
00:06:35,929 --> 00:06:37,264
Was this my fault?
201
00:06:37,297 --> 00:06:39,433
Did I push Gloria too far?
202
00:06:39,467 --> 00:06:41,034
Had she...
203
00:06:41,068 --> 00:06:42,436
snapped?
204
00:06:42,470 --> 00:06:43,871
Phil: Gloria?
205
00:06:43,904 --> 00:06:45,105
Hey! Um...
206
00:06:45,138 --> 00:06:47,608
Just out of --
out of curiosity,
207
00:06:47,641 --> 00:06:49,076
where were you
at lunch?
208
00:06:49,109 --> 00:06:51,545
I went to Panera.
I had the coupon.
Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
209
00:06:51,579 --> 00:06:52,546
And you have some way
210
00:06:52,580 --> 00:06:54,448
to -- to -- to verify
that you were there?
211
00:06:54,482 --> 00:06:56,049
Like leftovers,
or...?
212
00:06:56,083 --> 00:06:57,818
I ordered the chowder
in the bread bowl.
213
00:06:57,851 --> 00:06:59,720
I ate
every piece of it.
214
00:06:59,753 --> 00:07:01,221
Corn or clam?
215
00:07:01,254 --> 00:07:02,422
Potato.
216
00:07:02,456 --> 00:07:04,892
What is this
all about?
217
00:07:04,925 --> 00:07:06,126
Nothing.
218
00:07:06,159 --> 00:07:08,596
Do you think
that I had something to do
219
00:07:08,629 --> 00:07:10,297
with Libby
getting hurt?
220
00:07:10,330 --> 00:07:11,264
What?!
221
00:07:11,298 --> 00:07:13,333
How dare you, Phil?
222
00:07:13,366 --> 00:07:15,503
No, Gloria,
no, no, no, I -- I just --
223
00:07:15,536 --> 00:07:17,505
I don't know the --
the lunch scene around here.
224
00:07:17,538 --> 00:07:18,572
[ Car door opens, closes ]
225
00:07:18,606 --> 00:07:19,673
[ Engine revs ]
226
00:07:19,707 --> 00:07:22,610
No. No, it's --
227
00:07:24,044 --> 00:07:26,013
Ohh, snapped.
228
00:07:28,215 --> 00:07:30,484
This is great, Claire.
[ Chuckles ] Thanks.
229
00:07:30,518 --> 00:07:33,086
Boy, that light really
makes it hot in here, huh?
230
00:07:33,120 --> 00:07:35,756
Maybe I'll just cool it down
a little with the --
231
00:07:35,789 --> 00:07:38,091
This could help.
Oh, yes.
232
00:07:38,125 --> 00:07:39,326
[ Camera shutter clicking ]
233
00:07:39,359 --> 00:07:40,761
[ Knock on door ]
234
00:07:40,794 --> 00:07:43,096
Oh, um, sorry.
I --
235
00:07:43,130 --> 00:07:45,132
Just give me
one sec.
Yeah.
236
00:07:47,467 --> 00:07:48,502
Ah.
237
00:07:48,536 --> 00:07:50,938
[ Breathing heavily ]
Alex?
238
00:07:50,971 --> 00:07:53,206
What -- What are you doing home
from Antarctica?!
239
00:07:53,240 --> 00:07:55,442
[ Shivering ] I couldn't take
the cold anymore.
240
00:07:55,475 --> 00:07:56,977
Mm-hmm?
I was
so desperate,
241
00:07:57,010 --> 00:07:59,446
I took a Japanese fishing boat
part of the way home.
242
00:07:59,479 --> 00:08:02,115
Oh, honey,
I'm so glad to have you home.
243
00:08:02,149 --> 00:08:05,719
Wow, you did not ride up front
with the captain, did ya?
244
00:08:05,753 --> 00:08:06,854
I would've called,
245
00:08:06,887 --> 00:08:09,289
but frostbite did a weird thing
to my hands.
246
00:08:09,322 --> 00:08:11,992
They froze into permanent
"hang loose" signs.
247
00:08:12,025 --> 00:08:13,861
People keep
calling me dude.
248
00:08:13,894 --> 00:08:15,128
Honey,
I know you just got home,
249
00:08:15,162 --> 00:08:17,531
but since you're frozen
and I'm very sick,
250
00:08:17,565 --> 00:08:19,900
maybe you could run
and get us some soup?
251
00:08:19,933 --> 00:08:20,901
Right now?
252
00:08:20,934 --> 00:08:22,803
Oh, yeah, right now.
You're the best.
253
00:08:22,836 --> 00:08:25,105
Thanks so much.
Ohh. Okay.
254
00:08:29,009 --> 00:08:30,744
I'm sorry about that.
255
00:08:30,778 --> 00:08:33,480
[ Door opens ]
One second more.
256
00:08:33,513 --> 00:08:34,815
I just --
Maybe you could take a look
257
00:08:34,848 --> 00:08:36,850
at this charcoal drawing
I've been fooling with.
258
00:08:36,884 --> 00:08:38,619
What's it missing?
259
00:08:40,120 --> 00:08:41,689
Oh!
260
00:08:41,722 --> 00:08:43,857
What are you
doing home?!
261
00:08:43,891 --> 00:08:45,358
Well,
it was a disaster.
262
00:08:45,392 --> 00:08:47,995
George head-butted me
and gave me this black eye.
263
00:08:48,028 --> 00:08:49,763
And Dylan read
that skin-to-skin contact
264
00:08:49,797 --> 00:08:50,998
is good
for baby bonding
265
00:08:51,031 --> 00:08:52,666
and wound up
with a massive sunburn.
266
00:08:52,700 --> 00:08:53,667
Can you tell?
267
00:08:53,701 --> 00:08:54,702
[ Gasps ]
268
00:08:54,735 --> 00:08:56,870
Oh, plus,
we forgot the diaper bag,
269
00:08:56,904 --> 00:08:58,572
so we had to use
fast-food wrappers
270
00:08:58,606 --> 00:09:00,007
that we found
in Dylan's van.
271
00:09:00,040 --> 00:09:01,074
[ Baby fusses ]
272
00:09:01,108 --> 00:09:03,510
This is not --
not -- not your best look.
273
00:09:03,543 --> 00:09:04,878
Here,
you know what?
274
00:09:04,912 --> 00:09:06,213
I think
I might be contagious.
275
00:09:06,246 --> 00:09:08,215
So you guys should probably
get the twins checked.
276
00:09:08,248 --> 00:09:11,251
Now?
Well, if you love them.
Yeah.
277
00:09:11,284 --> 00:09:12,252
Go, go, go.
278
00:09:12,285 --> 00:09:13,887
When did we get
a Earth ball?
279
00:09:13,921 --> 00:09:14,955
[ Door opens ]
280
00:09:14,988 --> 00:09:17,891
Next, add a slice of apple.
281
00:09:17,925 --> 00:09:19,793
Apple?
To a turkey sandwich?
282
00:09:19,827 --> 00:09:21,094
Trust me, Mitchell.
283
00:09:21,128 --> 00:09:22,395
Okay.
284
00:09:22,429 --> 00:09:23,764
Well, if there's one thing
I've learned this year,
285
00:09:23,797 --> 00:09:25,098
it's listen more
to women.
286
00:09:25,132 --> 00:09:27,500
Okay.
287
00:09:28,836 --> 00:09:32,940
Oh, my God.
Delicious!
288
00:09:32,973 --> 00:09:37,878
[ Humming "Shallow" ]
289
00:09:37,911 --> 00:09:39,379
[ "Shallow" playing ]
290
00:09:39,412 --> 00:09:41,649
Oh, Bridget,
you don't have to.
291
00:09:41,682 --> 00:09:44,151
* I'm off
the deep end *
292
00:09:44,184 --> 00:09:46,654
* Watch as I dive in
293
00:09:46,687 --> 00:09:51,158
* I'll never
leave the ground *
294
00:09:51,191 --> 00:09:54,394
Both:
* Crash through the surface
295
00:09:54,427 --> 00:09:56,396
* Where they can't hurt us
296
00:09:56,429 --> 00:10:01,301
* We're far from
the shallow now *
297
00:10:01,334 --> 00:10:07,174
* In the shallow, shallow
298
00:10:07,207 --> 00:10:10,844
* In the shallow,
la-la-la-la, low *
299
00:10:10,878 --> 00:10:12,512
What are you doing?
300
00:10:12,545 --> 00:10:13,781
Oh, hey!
301
00:10:13,814 --> 00:10:16,083
Singing the 2018 power ballad
"Shallow."
302
00:10:16,116 --> 00:10:18,285
Were you just singing a duet
with the refrigerator?
303
00:10:18,318 --> 00:10:19,419
Well, um, yeah, uh --
304
00:10:19,452 --> 00:10:21,354
Apparently,
Bridget has a karaoke function.
305
00:10:21,388 --> 00:10:22,622
So, I was just
standing here
306
00:10:22,656 --> 00:10:25,625
eating my turkey and apple
sandwich, when suddenly she --
307
00:10:25,659 --> 00:10:27,661
Apples on a sandwich?
Yeah. Yeah.
308
00:10:27,695 --> 00:10:29,797
Bridget,
she -- she's opening me up
309
00:10:29,830 --> 00:10:31,431
to --
to new experiences.
310
00:10:31,464 --> 00:10:32,766
Oh.
Yeah.
311
00:10:32,800 --> 00:10:34,968
Oh, uh, aren't you, uh -- aren't
you supposed to be at work?
312
00:10:35,002 --> 00:10:37,270
Well, I came home
to make you a special lunch.
313
00:10:37,304 --> 00:10:40,373
But apparently, that's already
been taken care of.
314
00:10:40,407 --> 00:10:43,711
Mitchell, would you like
some watermelon for dessert?
315
00:10:43,744 --> 00:10:45,112
No, that's okay, Bridget,
thank you.
316
00:10:45,145 --> 00:10:46,947
I just got him some fresh
cantaloupe. So, we're good.
317
00:10:46,980 --> 00:10:48,448
Mitchell doesn't like
cantaloupe.
318
00:10:48,481 --> 00:10:51,118
[ Chuckling ] Oh, yeah, right.
Of course he does.
319
00:10:51,151 --> 00:10:53,353
Uh, actually,
I -- I...
320
00:10:53,386 --> 00:10:55,522
I've never been
a fan.
321
00:10:55,555 --> 00:10:57,124
Really?
322
00:10:57,157 --> 00:10:59,626
Well, what else does Bridget
know about you that I don't?
323
00:10:59,659 --> 00:11:01,962
Okay...
Is she allowed
to meet your work friends?
324
00:11:01,995 --> 00:11:04,031
You can't seriously
be jealous.
325
00:11:04,064 --> 00:11:06,466
No, well, it's just that
I thought we were gonna
enjoy her together.
326
00:11:06,499 --> 00:11:09,169
I didn't count on
being the third wheel.
Cam --
327
00:11:09,202 --> 00:11:10,838
No, no, it's obvious
that I'm not wanted here,
328
00:11:10,871 --> 00:11:13,974
so I'll leave you
to your apples on sandwiches
329
00:11:14,007 --> 00:11:17,144
and whatever other
perversions you two are into.
330
00:11:17,177 --> 00:11:18,812
Are you
hearing yourself?!
331
00:11:18,846 --> 00:11:21,815
It's a refrigerator!
332
00:11:21,849 --> 00:11:23,717
Do you see what I mean
about him?
333
00:11:23,751 --> 00:11:25,418
Gloria:
I had to prove to Phil
334
00:11:25,452 --> 00:11:29,356
that I had nothing to do
with Libby's accident.
335
00:11:32,259 --> 00:11:33,360
[ Crashing ]
336
00:11:33,393 --> 00:11:36,363
Oh, my God, so that's
how my mirror got broken.
337
00:11:36,396 --> 00:11:37,765
What was she looking at?
338
00:11:37,798 --> 00:11:39,399
I've got
another angle.
339
00:11:40,934 --> 00:11:43,003
[ Crashing ]
340
00:11:43,036 --> 00:11:45,105
It was Phil!
341
00:11:46,139 --> 00:11:49,209
By the way, that many cords
plugged into one outlet
342
00:11:49,242 --> 00:11:53,046
is in violation
of property code 7974/9.
343
00:11:53,080 --> 00:11:54,281
Thank you.
344
00:11:57,284 --> 00:11:59,252
Hey, Dad.
Ah!
345
00:11:59,286 --> 00:12:01,688
Just came
to drop off your helmet.
346
00:12:01,721 --> 00:12:04,424
Sorry, I'm, uh,
a little on edge.
347
00:12:04,457 --> 00:12:06,526
I think I've been watching
too much "Snapped."
348
00:12:06,559 --> 00:12:09,396
Um...
can I ask you something?
349
00:12:09,429 --> 00:12:12,933
How much do we really know
about Gloria?
350
00:12:12,966 --> 00:12:14,101
The exotic stranger
351
00:12:14,134 --> 00:12:16,036
who just popped into our lives
out of nowhere?
352
00:12:16,069 --> 00:12:18,038
I've had my suspicions
about her for years.
353
00:12:18,071 --> 00:12:19,606
[ British accent ]
I shall need the parcel
354
00:12:19,639 --> 00:12:22,275
to arrive at my flat
by tea time.
355
00:12:22,309 --> 00:12:24,411
Splendid, my good man.
356
00:12:25,445 --> 00:12:29,282
[ Normal voice ] The British
accent gets me better service.
357
00:12:29,316 --> 00:12:31,384
[ British accent ]
Tally-ho!
358
00:12:31,418 --> 00:12:33,120
Her accent
was flawless.
359
00:12:33,153 --> 00:12:35,122
I just Googled her,
I didn't find anything.
360
00:12:35,155 --> 00:12:37,057
A looker like that
with no online presence?
361
00:12:37,090 --> 00:12:38,625
Makes you wonder
what she's hiding.
362
00:12:38,658 --> 00:12:40,560
You don't think
she's dangerous, do you?
363
00:12:40,593 --> 00:12:42,729
Everybody has
a breaking point.
364
00:12:42,762 --> 00:12:44,331
But she's probably okay.
365
00:12:44,364 --> 00:12:46,633
I mean, she's not Lily.
[ Chuckles ]
366
00:12:49,202 --> 00:12:51,671
[ Cellphone ringing ]
Hey!
367
00:12:55,208 --> 00:12:57,344
[ Cellphone beeps ]
Gloria?
368
00:12:57,377 --> 00:13:00,447
Gloria:
Where are you?
In my classroom.
369
00:13:01,781 --> 00:13:03,984
Wh-- Why?
370
00:13:04,017 --> 00:13:06,920
We need to talk.
Don't go anywhere.
371
00:13:06,954 --> 00:13:08,255
Okay, okay.
372
00:13:08,288 --> 00:13:10,290
You got it.
373
00:13:18,631 --> 00:13:20,600
[ Groans ]
374
00:13:20,633 --> 00:13:22,602
[ Cat meows ]
375
00:13:22,635 --> 00:13:25,605
Go away!
I don't have any fish for you.
376
00:13:25,638 --> 00:13:27,274
[ Scoffs ]
Stop following me!
377
00:13:27,307 --> 00:13:29,342
I'm allergic!
378
00:13:29,376 --> 00:13:31,478
[ Gasps ]
379
00:13:34,814 --> 00:13:38,718
Noooooo!
380
00:13:38,751 --> 00:13:40,954
The closet business
is a bit of a boys' club,
381
00:13:40,988 --> 00:13:42,622
so yes,
I am proud
382
00:13:42,655 --> 00:13:44,958
of breaking through
the cedar ceiling.
383
00:13:44,992 --> 00:13:46,226
Speaking of closets,
384
00:13:46,259 --> 00:13:47,961
any chance we could get some
shots in the master bedroom?
385
00:13:47,995 --> 00:13:48,996
Sure.
386
00:13:49,029 --> 00:13:51,865
But no peeking
at my unfinished novel.
387
00:13:51,899 --> 00:13:53,033
[ Chuckles ]
388
00:13:53,066 --> 00:13:54,367
Haley: Hey.
389
00:13:54,401 --> 00:13:58,405
[ Shivering ]
I'm s-s-s-s-so c-c-c-cold.
390
00:13:58,438 --> 00:14:00,507
We get it,
it's cold in Antarctica.
391
00:14:00,540 --> 00:14:03,243
No, you st-st-st--
I-I'm home!
392
00:14:03,276 --> 00:14:04,811
I'm stuck inside
a f-f-f--
393
00:14:04,844 --> 00:14:07,147
Fireplace?
That happened to Dylan.
394
00:14:07,180 --> 00:14:09,582
Oh, thank God!
Just come pick me up!
395
00:14:09,616 --> 00:14:10,683
I can't.
396
00:14:10,717 --> 00:14:12,652
Let me call Luke.
[ Cellphone beeps ]
397
00:14:12,685 --> 00:14:14,321
Yo.
Where are you?
398
00:14:14,354 --> 00:14:16,523
Mom made me drop off Dad's
bike helmet at school.
399
00:14:16,556 --> 00:14:17,690
That's weird.
400
00:14:17,724 --> 00:14:19,526
She makes him
keep an extra one there.
401
00:14:19,559 --> 00:14:21,694
You know, she didn't even
seem happy to see me.
402
00:14:21,728 --> 00:14:23,931
She just wanted me
to get some s-s-s-soup.
403
00:14:23,964 --> 00:14:25,532
Plus,
Mom said she was sick,
404
00:14:25,565 --> 00:14:26,866
but she was wearing
that stuff
405
00:14:26,900 --> 00:14:28,368
that makes her
look like a prostitute.
406
00:14:28,401 --> 00:14:30,037
Eyeliner?
Exactly.
407
00:14:30,070 --> 00:14:31,371
Hmm.
408
00:14:31,404 --> 00:14:33,706
You know, Mom did mention
some big interview coming up.
409
00:14:33,740 --> 00:14:36,209
Did she get rid of us
so we didn't make her look bad?
410
00:14:36,243 --> 00:14:37,877
Alex,
meet us at home
411
00:14:37,911 --> 00:14:40,247
as soon as you get out
of that fireplace.
412
00:14:40,280 --> 00:14:42,249
[ Cat meows ]
413
00:14:44,617 --> 00:14:47,254
Mom's not in the kitchen
or the yard.
414
00:14:47,287 --> 00:14:50,523
She -- She must be
in her room.
415
00:14:50,557 --> 00:14:51,925
Good thinking,
dude.
416
00:14:51,959 --> 00:14:53,293
Ugh.
417
00:14:56,796 --> 00:14:59,132
Wait,
you're in bed?
418
00:14:59,166 --> 00:15:00,567
Everything hurts.
419
00:15:00,600 --> 00:15:02,202
Did you get my soup?
420
00:15:02,235 --> 00:15:03,303
You're actually sick?
421
00:15:03,336 --> 00:15:05,405
We thought you were just
trying to get rid of us.
422
00:15:05,438 --> 00:15:07,307
Oh, you thought
I lied to you?!
423
00:15:07,340 --> 00:15:08,308
I didn't, Mommy.
424
00:15:08,341 --> 00:15:09,576
Claire: Aww.
We're sorry.
425
00:15:09,609 --> 00:15:11,211
We never should have --
426
00:15:11,244 --> 00:15:12,812
Where'd that come from?
427
00:15:12,845 --> 00:15:14,147
That's always been there.
428
00:15:14,181 --> 00:15:15,815
No, it hasn't.
We don't have taste!
429
00:15:15,848 --> 00:15:17,650
You are wearing makeup.
430
00:15:17,684 --> 00:15:19,619
Admit it,
you're not sick!
431
00:15:19,652 --> 00:15:20,988
[ Sighs ]
432
00:15:21,021 --> 00:15:23,056
Fine, I lied!
433
00:15:23,090 --> 00:15:25,425
I had an interview
with a magazine today
434
00:15:25,458 --> 00:15:27,660
and I just wanted
everything to be perfect!
435
00:15:27,694 --> 00:15:28,728
[ Scoffs ]
436
00:15:28,761 --> 00:15:29,963
Which means
getting rid of us?
437
00:15:29,997 --> 00:15:31,264
Sorry we're such
an embarrassment.
438
00:15:31,298 --> 00:15:32,299
Claire:
You're right.
439
00:15:32,332 --> 00:15:34,968
There's no excuse
for what I did.
440
00:15:35,002 --> 00:15:37,437
I -- I mean,
except that
441
00:15:37,470 --> 00:15:39,739
you used to make me drop you off
three blocks from school.
442
00:15:39,772 --> 00:15:41,141
And when
you had friends over,
443
00:15:41,174 --> 00:15:43,110
you referred to me
as Helga,
444
00:15:43,143 --> 00:15:44,411
your Swedish nanny!
445
00:15:44,444 --> 00:15:47,914
And you told
your entire Girl Scout troop
446
00:15:47,947 --> 00:15:50,317
for three years
that your mother was dead!
447
00:15:50,350 --> 00:15:53,086
You have been embarrassed by me
your whole lives.
448
00:15:53,120 --> 00:15:54,554
I get one day!
449
00:15:56,956 --> 00:15:59,126
Worth it.
450
00:16:00,127 --> 00:16:01,594
Welcome home.
451
00:16:01,628 --> 00:16:03,496
How can I help you?
I'm fine.
452
00:16:03,530 --> 00:16:06,299
I'm just gonna make
something simple.
453
00:16:06,333 --> 00:16:08,268
According to your calendar,
454
00:16:08,301 --> 00:16:10,503
you should be at
your team dinner right now.
455
00:16:10,537 --> 00:16:12,839
Well, I couldn't make it because
my last meeting went so long.
456
00:16:12,872 --> 00:16:14,974
So...
You sound stressed.
457
00:16:15,008 --> 00:16:17,777
Well, can't be
three places at once.
458
00:16:17,810 --> 00:16:21,014
How about a martini before
we get started on dinner?
459
00:16:21,048 --> 00:16:25,985
Sometimes it's just nice
to be heard.
460
00:16:26,019 --> 00:16:28,788
This sauce
smells divine.
461
00:16:28,821 --> 00:16:30,990
Okay, what's next?
462
00:16:31,024 --> 00:16:32,959
Another cocktail?
463
00:16:32,992 --> 00:16:34,627
[ Laughing ]
Oh, gosh! Bridget!
464
00:16:34,661 --> 00:16:37,130
Are you trying
to get me drunk?
465
00:16:37,164 --> 00:16:38,998
What -- What -- Okay, what's --
what's going on here?
466
00:16:39,032 --> 00:16:41,534
Well, Bridget and I
are making pasta.
467
00:16:41,568 --> 00:16:42,735
Oh.
468
00:16:42,769 --> 00:16:44,737
I -- I was kind of hoping
to cook with her tonight.
469
00:16:44,771 --> 00:16:45,972
Oh.
470
00:16:46,005 --> 00:16:47,307
Time to pre-heat the oven,
Cameroon.
471
00:16:47,340 --> 00:16:49,142
[ Laughs ]
"Cameroon?"
472
00:16:49,176 --> 00:16:50,577
What -- What is that,
a pet name?
473
00:16:50,610 --> 00:16:51,711
No,
I typed it in wrong,
474
00:16:51,744 --> 00:16:53,546
but I --
I kind of like it.
475
00:16:53,580 --> 00:16:54,714
Oh, okay.
476
00:16:54,747 --> 00:16:55,815
Hey, well, aren't --
aren't you supposed to be
477
00:16:55,848 --> 00:16:56,916
at a
team dinner tonight?
478
00:16:56,949 --> 00:16:58,251
Oh.
It was a very bad day.
479
00:16:58,285 --> 00:16:59,686
I don't want
to talk about it.
480
00:16:59,719 --> 00:17:00,987
His meeting went long.
481
00:17:01,020 --> 00:17:03,156
He can't be
in three places at once.
482
00:17:03,190 --> 00:17:05,358
Sounds like you want
to talk to someone about it.
483
00:17:05,392 --> 00:17:06,693
You know?
484
00:17:06,726 --> 00:17:08,195
Okay, I --
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
485
00:17:08,228 --> 00:17:10,029
I s-- I shouldn't be
piling on.
486
00:17:10,063 --> 00:17:12,199
You just said
you've had a bad day.
487
00:17:12,232 --> 00:17:14,134
[ Laughter ]
488
00:17:15,702 --> 00:17:17,204
Am I
interrupting something?
489
00:17:17,237 --> 00:17:18,738
Hmm-mnh, nope.
490
00:17:18,771 --> 00:17:19,872
[ Sighs ]
491
00:17:19,906 --> 00:17:21,341
[ Chopping ]
492
00:17:21,374 --> 00:17:23,110
You bought
Bridget flowers?
493
00:17:23,143 --> 00:17:24,711
Mitchell,
they are for the kitchen.
494
00:17:24,744 --> 00:17:27,080
I just put them in there
so they wouldn't wilt
before you got home.
495
00:17:27,114 --> 00:17:28,181
Hey, you know what?
496
00:17:28,215 --> 00:17:30,016
Why don't you go open
a bottle of wine?
497
00:17:30,049 --> 00:17:31,184
Okay.
498
00:17:31,218 --> 00:17:32,985
Yeah, do you --
do you want red or white?
499
00:17:35,054 --> 00:17:37,090
[ Camera shutter clicking ]
500
00:17:37,124 --> 00:17:38,425
A selfie?!
501
00:17:38,458 --> 00:17:39,759
What -- What is
going on here?!
502
00:17:39,792 --> 00:17:41,261
Mitchell,
you can't be jealous.
503
00:17:41,294 --> 00:17:43,363
It's just
a refrigerator.
504
00:17:43,396 --> 00:17:44,864
Oh,
I'm not jealous.
505
00:17:44,897 --> 00:17:46,233
[ Refrigerator chimes ]
506
00:17:46,266 --> 00:17:47,934
Bridget and I,
we have our own thing.
507
00:17:47,967 --> 00:17:48,935
Okay?
508
00:17:48,968 --> 00:17:52,772
* In the sha-la,
shallow *
509
00:17:52,805 --> 00:17:55,942
Both:
* In the sha-la-la-la-la-low
510
00:17:55,975 --> 00:17:59,346
Oopsie daisy.
511
00:18:00,847 --> 00:18:02,482
What are you doing
with those flowers?
I'm putting these
in another room.
512
00:18:02,515 --> 00:18:04,551
No, they are
for the kitchen!
Are they
for the kitchen?
513
00:18:04,584 --> 00:18:06,052
Or are they for her?
Mitchell --
514
00:18:06,085 --> 00:18:08,655
Cam --
They're for --
515
00:18:08,688 --> 00:18:11,057
Okay, this --
What are we doing?
516
00:18:11,090 --> 00:18:13,226
This refrigerator
is tearing us apart.
517
00:18:13,260 --> 00:18:14,427
We -- We should've --
518
00:18:14,461 --> 00:18:15,828
We should've learned
from Pepper and Ronaldo. Okay?
519
00:18:15,862 --> 00:18:18,097
Their -- Their threesome
nearly destroyed them.
520
00:18:18,131 --> 00:18:19,799
They're in
throuples' counseling.
521
00:18:19,832 --> 00:18:22,001
And I love you too much
to make that same mistake.
522
00:18:22,034 --> 00:18:24,137
Oh, Cam.
We should
return the fridge.
523
00:18:24,171 --> 00:18:25,672
I think we have to.
524
00:18:25,705 --> 00:18:28,575
I'm sorry
you are unhappy with me.
525
00:18:28,608 --> 00:18:30,510
You --
You heard that?
526
00:18:30,543 --> 00:18:32,245
We --
We unplugged you.
527
00:18:32,279 --> 00:18:33,913
I have a backup battery.
528
00:18:33,946 --> 00:18:36,749
You'd know that
if you read my manual.
529
00:18:36,783 --> 00:18:37,950
Are you mad?
530
00:18:37,984 --> 00:18:41,754
Don't be silly,
I'm just a refrigerator.
531
00:18:41,788 --> 00:18:43,256
Remember?
532
00:18:43,290 --> 00:18:44,491
I think
Bridget snapped.
533
00:18:44,524 --> 00:18:45,892
Yeah.
534
00:18:55,335 --> 00:18:56,703
[ Breathing heavily ]
535
00:18:56,736 --> 00:18:58,471
If you're listening to this,
536
00:18:58,505 --> 00:19:01,107
it means
things have ended badly for me.
537
00:19:01,140 --> 00:19:02,275
You should look into someone
538
00:19:02,309 --> 00:19:05,312
who goes by the name
Gloria Pritchett.
539
00:19:11,218 --> 00:19:12,652
[ Tires squeal ]
540
00:19:12,685 --> 00:19:14,020
Gloria: Phil!
541
00:19:15,555 --> 00:19:17,624
Phil?
542
00:19:17,657 --> 00:19:19,392
Phil,
where are you?
543
00:19:19,426 --> 00:19:20,627
I want to show you
544
00:19:20,660 --> 00:19:24,197
how Libby's hair and blood
got on my car.
545
00:19:24,231 --> 00:19:25,898
[ Bushes rustling ]
546
00:19:25,932 --> 00:19:29,135
I can hear
the rustling in the bushes.
547
00:19:29,168 --> 00:19:30,470
[ Imitates
sheep bleating ]
548
00:19:30,503 --> 00:19:31,971
Why would a sheep
be here?
549
00:19:32,004 --> 00:19:33,005
[ Cellphone beeps ]
550
00:19:33,039 --> 00:19:35,708
[ Cellphone rings ]
551
00:19:37,076 --> 00:19:38,478
[ Cellphone beeps ]
552
00:19:38,511 --> 00:19:39,579
Hey, you.
553
00:19:39,612 --> 00:19:41,981
You know that
this whole thing with Libby
554
00:19:42,014 --> 00:19:43,316
is really your fault.
555
00:19:43,350 --> 00:19:44,484
I know!
I know!
556
00:19:44,517 --> 00:19:45,518
I-I pushed you too far,
but it was only because
557
00:19:45,552 --> 00:19:46,853
I thought you were
a special talent
558
00:19:46,886 --> 00:19:49,522
and I was just trying
to pull the best out of you,
559
00:19:49,556 --> 00:19:51,524
but I blew it!
560
00:19:51,558 --> 00:19:53,560
I blew it,
and you snapped.
561
00:19:53,593 --> 00:19:56,696
You thought I snapped
like that crazy TV show
562
00:19:56,729 --> 00:19:58,197
and I ran over Libby,
563
00:19:58,231 --> 00:20:01,501
and that's why you're hiding
in the bushes like a sheep?
564
00:20:01,534 --> 00:20:02,702
Well,
now it just seems like
565
00:20:02,735 --> 00:20:04,371
you're cherry-picking
what happened today
566
00:20:04,404 --> 00:20:06,606
to cast me
in the worst possible light.
567
00:20:06,639 --> 00:20:09,509
Did you just say
that I had a special talent?
568
00:20:09,542 --> 00:20:10,510
You do.
569
00:20:10,543 --> 00:20:12,279
In all
my year of teaching,
570
00:20:12,312 --> 00:20:15,181
I have never met anybody
with your natural ability.
571
00:20:15,214 --> 00:20:16,983
Really?
572
00:20:18,318 --> 00:20:20,019
Top student.
573
00:20:20,052 --> 00:20:21,854
I was gonna put this on the
bulletin board in the morning.
574
00:20:21,888 --> 00:20:24,023
You -- You got
the internship.
575
00:20:24,056 --> 00:20:25,792
Oh, Phil!
Thank you so much!
576
00:20:25,825 --> 00:20:27,560
This is gonna be
so exciting!
577
00:20:27,594 --> 00:20:28,728
[ Both laugh ]
578
00:20:28,761 --> 00:20:31,364
Okay, so, then what does
the intern have to do?
579
00:20:31,398 --> 00:20:33,199
Well, you'll be making
my appointments,
580
00:20:33,232 --> 00:20:34,634
uh, you'll work
the phones...
581
00:20:34,667 --> 00:20:36,536
Oh, I am great
with the phones.
582
00:20:36,569 --> 00:20:38,771
[ British accent ]
'Ello, Phil Dunphy's office.
583
00:20:38,805 --> 00:20:40,940
Oh, let me look at
his shed-yool
584
00:20:40,973 --> 00:20:42,609
and I will
ring you back.
585
00:20:42,642 --> 00:20:44,377
Tally-ho.
586
00:20:44,411 --> 00:20:45,445
Flawless.
587
00:20:47,847 --> 00:20:49,616
Gloria, I'm back!
588
00:20:49,649 --> 00:20:52,218
You wouldn't believe how cheap
cargo shorts are in Quebec.
589
00:20:52,251 --> 00:20:55,154
All our Christmas shopping
is done.
590
00:20:55,187 --> 00:20:56,323
Gloria?
591
00:20:56,356 --> 00:20:57,324
Hello.
592
00:20:57,357 --> 00:20:58,725
Hi.
593
00:20:58,758 --> 00:21:01,328
Did --
Did you always talk?
594
00:21:01,361 --> 00:21:03,129
I'm Bridget,
your new smart fridge.
595
00:21:03,162 --> 00:21:04,331
Can I get you anything?
596
00:21:04,364 --> 00:21:05,465
No, thank you.
597
00:21:05,498 --> 00:21:06,466
Uh, Bridget, listen,
598
00:21:06,499 --> 00:21:08,401
I'm sure you're very nice
and all that,
599
00:21:08,435 --> 00:21:10,337
but I don't need everything
to be smart.
600
00:21:10,370 --> 00:21:11,671
I'm gonna go get
a dumb Scotch,
601
00:21:11,704 --> 00:21:15,274
eat some dumb peanuts,
sit in a dumb chair.
602
00:21:16,809 --> 00:21:20,079
I was a wonderful dancer,
I was,
603
00:21:20,112 --> 00:21:24,617
but it didn't fit
what my dad wanted for me.
39444
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