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1
00:00:06,131 --> 00:00:07,382
David?
2
00:00:08,884 --> 00:00:10,678
David, what is this?
3
00:00:11,846 --> 00:00:13,764
It looks like a bike.
4
00:00:14,348 --> 00:00:15,766
Is it yours?
5
00:00:16,391 --> 00:00:18,393
Yes. Yes, it is.
6
00:00:19,561 --> 00:00:21,814
David, what is this
doing here?
7
00:00:21,856 --> 00:00:23,148
You might wanna
read the note.
8
00:00:24,149 --> 00:00:25,818
Is it from Mutt?
9
00:00:25,860 --> 00:00:27,027
ALEXIS: David!
10
00:00:28,904 --> 00:00:32,240
No! No!
11
00:00:32,282 --> 00:00:33,742
I feel like he really
gets you.
12
00:00:33,784 --> 00:00:36,996
Like, I feel like he sees,
like, deep into your soul.
13
00:00:37,037 --> 00:00:39,373
I'm not quite sure what
he's seeing exactly,
14
00:00:39,414 --> 00:00:41,709
but there's definitely...
He's looking inward.
15
00:00:41,750 --> 00:00:43,752
-What am I gonna do?
-About what?
16
00:00:43,794 --> 00:00:46,881
This is serious, David!
This is so off base!
17
00:00:46,922 --> 00:00:48,089
(ALEXIS GRUNTING)
18
00:00:48,131 --> 00:00:50,384
Oh, my God, imagine what
kind of ring he'd buy!
19
00:00:50,425 --> 00:00:51,510
Like, an opal or something.
20
00:00:51,552 --> 00:00:53,261
Oh, like a pear-shaped opal.
21
00:00:53,303 --> 00:00:54,805
-(GROANS)
-(KNOCKING)
22
00:00:54,847 --> 00:00:56,431
MUTT: Hello,
is anybody home?
23
00:00:56,473 --> 00:00:58,058
No, Mutt!
24
00:00:58,099 --> 00:01:00,101
Hey, you have to support me
in this.
25
00:01:00,143 --> 00:01:02,604
-Mmm-hmm.
-You have to,
do you promise me?
26
00:01:02,646 --> 00:01:03,689
Oh yeah, of course.
27
00:01:03,731 --> 00:01:05,399
(SIGHS)
28
00:01:08,109 --> 00:01:11,071
-So?
-Hey, you!
29
00:01:12,781 --> 00:01:14,992
This is so special for me.
30
00:01:15,034 --> 00:01:17,661
Well, I thought you
needed a new mode
of transportation.
31
00:01:17,703 --> 00:01:21,540
I do! I do need a new mode
of transportation!
32
00:01:21,582 --> 00:01:25,836
And, like, a car
would be nice,
but do I need a car?
33
00:01:25,878 --> 00:01:28,547
Not any more, it appears.
34
00:01:28,589 --> 00:01:30,674
Well, you said you missed
spin class, so...
35
00:01:30,716 --> 00:01:33,594
I did! I did say that
I missed spin class,
36
00:01:33,635 --> 00:01:35,345
and so you bought me a bike!
37
00:01:35,387 --> 00:01:37,389
Because I said that
I missed spin class.
38
00:01:37,431 --> 00:01:41,351
Because you're so thoughtful
and perceptive.
39
00:01:41,393 --> 00:01:44,187
-So, you like it?
-Mmm, I'd say she loves it.
40
00:01:44,229 --> 00:01:46,607
-Mmm-hmm.
-Well, you're gonna
need this.
41
00:01:46,648 --> 00:01:49,651
BOTH: A helmet!
42
00:01:49,693 --> 00:01:50,736
It came with the bike.
43
00:01:50,778 --> 00:01:52,362
I think you should
put it on.
44
00:01:52,404 --> 00:01:54,448
Like, I think you should
actually like, like,
put the helmet on.
45
00:01:54,990 --> 00:01:56,617
Yeah.
46
00:01:56,658 --> 00:02:00,662
And I will one day,
when we take this little
pony for a joyride!
47
00:02:00,704 --> 00:02:02,998
Actually, I brought my bike,
so we can test it out.
48
00:02:03,040 --> 00:02:05,250
I thought maybe we
could take a little ride
to the cafe.
49
00:02:06,001 --> 00:02:08,087
Ah! So fun.
50
00:02:08,128 --> 00:02:10,171
(MOUTHING)
I hate you, David!
51
00:02:11,381 --> 00:02:12,716
See ya!
52
00:02:27,397 --> 00:02:29,149
What about lamps?
53
00:02:29,190 --> 00:02:32,402
The lamps at the motel
have those uh,
54
00:02:32,444 --> 00:02:33,862
little bulbs.
55
00:02:33,904 --> 00:02:36,740
These are old-fashioned
big bulb lamps.
56
00:02:36,782 --> 00:02:38,575
I don't see any bulbs here.
57
00:02:38,617 --> 00:02:39,910
No, there aren't,
but the point is,
58
00:02:39,952 --> 00:02:43,080
we can get big bulbs
if we have big bulb lamps.
59
00:02:43,122 --> 00:02:45,332
Oh, John. I don't know.
60
00:02:45,373 --> 00:02:48,127
Lamps, clothing,
jewellery...
61
00:02:48,167 --> 00:02:54,257
Look at this poor woman's
life strewn across
cheap folding tables.
62
00:02:54,299 --> 00:02:57,845
John, do you think they did
this with our things?
63
00:02:57,886 --> 00:03:01,015
No, not ours, no.
They put our stuff
right on the lawn.
64
00:03:02,474 --> 00:03:06,854
Strangers picking through
precious pieces we owned!
65
00:03:06,895 --> 00:03:10,691
I know, and judging us
like we're judging
this poor woman.
66
00:03:10,732 --> 00:03:14,444
Well, except they'd
have been saying,
"What great taste they had!"
67
00:03:14,486 --> 00:03:16,822
I wonder who got
my golf clubs.
68
00:03:16,864 --> 00:03:19,700
Really, John, that's the
first thing that
comes to mind?
69
00:03:19,741 --> 00:03:21,409
They were custom made.
70
00:03:21,451 --> 00:03:24,872
So was my Galapagonian
tortoise-shell foot bath.
71
00:03:24,913 --> 00:03:28,667
And now some lonely hoarder
is letting his cats poop
in it.
72
00:03:28,709 --> 00:03:33,338
Well, they were just things,
Moira, just things.
73
00:03:33,380 --> 00:03:35,924
Yeah, designer,
one-of-a-kind things.
74
00:03:35,966 --> 00:03:40,303
Yeah, sleek, oak-trimmed,
leather interior,
75
00:03:40,345 --> 00:03:42,347
-German-engineered things.
-(SIGHS)
76
00:03:43,932 --> 00:03:46,351
Shopping used
to cheer me up.
77
00:03:46,393 --> 00:03:48,269
Big bulbs is not
doing it for me.
78
00:03:50,271 --> 00:03:51,773
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
79
00:03:53,692 --> 00:03:54,902
(KNOCKING CONTINUES)
80
00:03:54,943 --> 00:03:57,404
(GROANS) Oh, god.
81
00:03:57,445 --> 00:03:59,907
-Roland!
-Sure, I'll come in,
but just for a second.
82
00:03:59,948 --> 00:04:01,324
Ahem!
83
00:04:02,283 --> 00:04:04,494
-Huh.
-(ROLAND LAUGHS)
84
00:04:04,536 --> 00:04:06,121
Can I help you
with something?
85
00:04:07,497 --> 00:04:09,917
Well, um, here's the deal.
86
00:04:09,958 --> 00:04:11,626
Uh, I was thinking
this morning,
87
00:04:11,668 --> 00:04:13,294
and I don't wanna tell you
where I was thinking,
88
00:04:13,336 --> 00:04:14,629
but it was a small room
in my house,
89
00:04:14,671 --> 00:04:16,464
-and I was sitting down...
-Okay.
90
00:04:16,506 --> 00:04:18,217
And I was thinking
to myself,
91
00:04:18,258 --> 00:04:22,679
who can I trust to help me
pick out a woman's blouse?
92
00:04:24,556 --> 00:04:27,017
And you know whose name
came to mind?
93
00:04:27,059 --> 00:04:28,936
I don't, I don't know,
Rachel Zoe?
94
00:04:29,603 --> 00:04:30,896
Yours!
95
00:04:30,938 --> 00:04:32,606
I don't know how
to take that.
96
00:04:33,273 --> 00:04:34,357
It's for Jocelyn.
97
00:04:34,816 --> 00:04:36,610
Mmm.
98
00:04:36,651 --> 00:04:39,362
And, you know, I would do it
myself, it's just that
you know, shopping,
99
00:04:39,404 --> 00:04:41,489
I mean, you go in,
you get, you,
100
00:04:41,531 --> 00:04:44,159
-you know, look at the stuff
on the racks.
-Mmm-hmm.
101
00:04:44,201 --> 00:04:46,828
You pick out, you know,
the colour that you like,
102
00:04:46,870 --> 00:04:48,496
and then you try it on
and make sure it fits you,
103
00:04:48,538 --> 00:04:50,665
and then you buy it
and you...
104
00:04:50,707 --> 00:04:52,542
You're just describing
what shopping is.
105
00:04:52,584 --> 00:04:54,878
Yes, and normally I'm fine
with that,
106
00:04:54,920 --> 00:04:58,799
it's just I'm looking
for something
a little fancy here.
107
00:04:58,840 --> 00:05:02,469
A little um, stylish.
A little elegant.
108
00:05:02,510 --> 00:05:04,345
-Ah.
-You know?
109
00:05:04,387 --> 00:05:06,681
And who knows elegance
better than you, pal?
110
00:05:06,723 --> 00:05:10,018
I mean, you're the only
elegant guy I know!
111
00:05:10,060 --> 00:05:13,188
So you're looking for me
to style Jocelyn?
112
00:05:14,606 --> 00:05:17,276
Well, actually, this is
supposed to be a surprise.
113
00:05:17,317 --> 00:05:19,486
So, I was kinda thinking
that maybe, um,
114
00:05:19,527 --> 00:05:23,282
you and me could just go out
and do a little uh,
115
00:05:23,323 --> 00:05:25,117
shopping together
on the down low.
116
00:05:29,121 --> 00:05:32,540
Yeah, yeah...
Yeah, that um...
117
00:05:32,582 --> 00:05:34,501
No, we could to that,
we could do that
at some point.
118
00:05:34,542 --> 00:05:36,295
-Oh, great!
-Yeah. Yeah.
119
00:05:36,335 --> 00:05:38,213
Good, that's terrific.
120
00:05:38,255 --> 00:05:41,133
So then, when ever's
good for you.
121
00:05:41,175 --> 00:05:42,550
Okay, great.
122
00:05:47,973 --> 00:05:49,641
So you wanna,
so you wanna go now?
123
00:05:49,683 --> 00:05:52,311
It's a little
time sensitive,
that's the only thing.
124
00:05:52,351 --> 00:05:56,064
Yeah, okay, well, I take it
you have measurements,
and a mood board, then?
125
00:05:56,106 --> 00:05:58,150
The whole purpose
of having a bike
126
00:05:58,192 --> 00:06:00,359
might be to actually
ride the bike.
127
00:06:00,401 --> 00:06:02,445
Yeah, I'm just not wearing
the right outfit.
128
00:06:02,487 --> 00:06:04,363
It's a five minute ride.
129
00:06:04,405 --> 00:06:07,575
Yeah, so by the time we get
on and then we get off
it's almost not worth it.
130
00:06:08,785 --> 00:06:10,411
Do you not like the bike?
131
00:06:10,453 --> 00:06:12,455
No, I love it!
132
00:06:12,497 --> 00:06:16,751
It's just that, um, there
are so many drunk
drivers around here.
133
00:06:16,793 --> 00:06:18,128
It's 10:00 a.m.
134
00:06:18,170 --> 00:06:20,297
Mutt, you tell that
to an alcoholic!
135
00:06:20,339 --> 00:06:22,674
Is it the colour?
Because, I mean,
it's totally fixable!
136
00:06:22,716 --> 00:06:24,009
Okay, fine.
137
00:06:24,051 --> 00:06:25,677
I don't know how
to ride a bike.
138
00:06:25,719 --> 00:06:28,305
-What?
-I said, I don't know
how to ride a bike!
139
00:06:29,806 --> 00:06:31,266
(ALEXIS GROANS)
140
00:06:33,185 --> 00:06:34,686
(SIGHS)
141
00:06:40,817 --> 00:06:43,070
Moira, look at
these cufflinks.
142
00:06:43,111 --> 00:06:46,698
Oh, John. We're better off
stealing cutlery
from the cafe!
143
00:06:46,740 --> 00:06:48,867
No, these look
like sterling.
144
00:06:48,909 --> 00:06:50,660
I'm gonna bid on these.
145
00:06:50,702 --> 00:06:52,246
Hey there, Roses!
146
00:06:52,287 --> 00:06:53,496
-Oh, hi.
-Oh hey, Jocelyn.
147
00:06:53,538 --> 00:06:55,374
Look at you two
bargain hunters.
148
00:06:55,414 --> 00:06:57,125
You finding anything yet?
149
00:06:57,167 --> 00:07:00,587
Um, nothing you couldn't see
fall out of a common
Christmas cracker!
150
00:07:00,628 --> 00:07:04,091
I think half the fun is
panning for nuggets
at these things.
151
00:07:04,132 --> 00:07:06,343
Oh, look at that mattress!
152
00:07:07,386 --> 00:07:09,721
Well, there you go,
what a find.
153
00:07:09,763 --> 00:07:12,140
Poor dear, enchanted
by a death bed.
154
00:07:12,182 --> 00:07:15,102
This is a brand
new mattress,
it's still in the plastic!
155
00:07:15,143 --> 00:07:16,519
-What?
-Yeah!
156
00:07:16,561 --> 00:07:19,522
And it's memory foam!
This must've cost a fortune!
157
00:07:19,564 --> 00:07:21,900
Well, you're just gonna have
to bid on it.
158
00:07:21,942 --> 00:07:24,527
John, why didn't you see
that mattress first?
159
00:07:24,569 --> 00:07:26,487
That's something we could
actually use!
160
00:07:26,529 --> 00:07:28,115
I'll use the cufflinks!
161
00:07:28,156 --> 00:07:29,241
What size is it?
162
00:07:29,283 --> 00:07:31,243
Oh I don't know,
it's at least a queen.
163
00:07:32,827 --> 00:07:35,163
Well, that's too big
to get home.
164
00:07:35,205 --> 00:07:36,873
No, we got the truck.
165
00:07:36,915 --> 00:07:40,501
But awkward, Jocelyn,
and awkward with those
tiny doorways of yours.
166
00:07:40,543 --> 00:07:43,504
Johnny, help me cover it up.
I don't want other people
to see it.
167
00:07:43,546 --> 00:07:44,714
(JOCELYN STRAINING)
168
00:07:47,926 --> 00:07:49,844
Now, we need a top
and we need a bottom.
169
00:07:49,886 --> 00:07:51,430
Like a skirt,
something like that,
170
00:07:51,471 --> 00:07:53,640
which I know you're familiar
with 'cause you're
wearing one.
171
00:07:53,681 --> 00:07:55,934
Okay, these are pants that
just so happen to have
172
00:07:55,976 --> 00:07:58,979
a pant fabric over the front
and back, okay.
173
00:07:59,020 --> 00:08:01,815
Yeah, it's a skirt.
Um, what about this?
174
00:08:01,856 --> 00:08:03,524
It seems durable, yes?
175
00:08:03,566 --> 00:08:07,862
Yeah, um, in fashion,
durable and elegant
rarely go hand in hand.
176
00:08:07,904 --> 00:08:10,657
So I'd put that...
Put that back.
177
00:08:10,698 --> 00:08:12,742
Okay, so not that.
178
00:08:12,784 --> 00:08:14,535
What about this?
179
00:08:14,577 --> 00:08:18,915
Jocelyn seems to like
loud floral prints.
180
00:08:18,957 --> 00:08:23,253
Yeah, the thing is, um,
this is kind of a special
kind of blouse.
181
00:08:23,295 --> 00:08:25,005
Uh-huh.
182
00:08:25,046 --> 00:08:26,589
Have you ever seen
The Devil Wears Prada?
183
00:08:26,631 --> 00:08:28,216
-Obviously!
-Okay, well,
184
00:08:28,258 --> 00:08:31,803
Meryl Streep plays this kind
of powerful, sexy
fashion woman...
185
00:08:31,845 --> 00:08:33,596
Yep, I've seen it!
186
00:08:33,638 --> 00:08:36,891
Okay, anyway, Jocelyn and I
like to have a little fun
with that idea,
187
00:08:36,933 --> 00:08:38,101
if you know what I mean.
188
00:08:38,143 --> 00:08:40,270
She plays Meryl,
and I play the nervous
189
00:08:40,312 --> 00:08:42,563
but ambitious intern
who's new to the city.
190
00:08:45,275 --> 00:08:49,570
Oh, so you're the, so you,
you're the Anne Hathaway
in that situation?
191
00:08:49,612 --> 00:08:51,614
I don't know who that is.
192
00:08:51,656 --> 00:08:53,867
Well, that's more
than enough
information for me to go on.
193
00:08:56,203 --> 00:08:57,871
ALEXIS: You're judging me!
MUTT: I'm not!
194
00:08:57,912 --> 00:09:00,290
It's just, riding a bike
is a pretty basic skill.
195
00:09:00,332 --> 00:09:02,125
Um, is it though?
196
00:09:02,167 --> 00:09:04,544
I think that most kids learn
how to ride a bike!
197
00:09:04,585 --> 00:09:06,546
Yeah well, most kids
also get head lice.
198
00:09:06,587 --> 00:09:08,882
I'm sorry if the opportunity
never presented itself.
199
00:09:08,923 --> 00:09:10,842
Oh what, there was no
gap year in Belgium?
200
00:09:10,884 --> 00:09:13,303
No Tour de France boyfriend?
201
00:09:13,345 --> 00:09:15,180
Yeah, but I never had
to ride the bike!
202
00:09:17,432 --> 00:09:20,018
And David was such
a little drama queen
203
00:09:20,060 --> 00:09:22,229
when my parents tried
teaching him,
204
00:09:22,270 --> 00:09:24,481
that they threw all
the bikes
into this big bonfire
205
00:09:24,523 --> 00:09:26,566
up in the Hamptons, and we
never talked about it again.
206
00:09:27,984 --> 00:09:29,861
Oh.
207
00:09:29,903 --> 00:09:32,239
Anyway, I have
lots of skills
that you don't have.
208
00:09:32,280 --> 00:09:33,990
I am sure that you do.
209
00:09:34,032 --> 00:09:35,950
Like, have you ever had
to negotiate in Arabic?
It is very difficult.
210
00:09:35,992 --> 00:09:37,285
I believe you.
211
00:09:37,327 --> 00:09:39,162
And try getting into
Kiss Kiss in Tokyo
212
00:09:39,204 --> 00:09:40,663
without a lock
of human hair.
213
00:09:40,705 --> 00:09:42,374
Now, you see,
if you can do all that,
214
00:09:42,416 --> 00:09:44,834
I'm pretty sure that you can
learn to ride a bike.
215
00:09:44,876 --> 00:09:46,211
(LAUGHS)
216
00:09:48,463 --> 00:09:49,756
Alexis?
217
00:09:51,841 --> 00:09:55,678
Sorry, I was just thinking
about this crazy night
at Kiss Kiss.
218
00:09:58,432 --> 00:09:59,682
(LAUGHS)
219
00:10:04,062 --> 00:10:06,773
Well, this might be
the closest we're gonna
get to Meryl.
220
00:10:06,814 --> 00:10:10,110
You know, if she got fired
from her job
at the magazine,
221
00:10:10,151 --> 00:10:12,529
and started walking
the streets.
222
00:10:12,571 --> 00:10:15,115
Oh, that's a good one!
We haven't tried
that one yet.
223
00:10:15,156 --> 00:10:17,117
-Yeah, I wouldn't.
-No, it's a good idea.
224
00:10:17,158 --> 00:10:19,160
WOMAN: Missing Peter Pan?
225
00:10:21,329 --> 00:10:22,747
I'm sorry?
226
00:10:22,789 --> 00:10:26,042
Well, because I see
a couple of Lost Boys.
(CHUCKLES)
227
00:10:28,503 --> 00:10:33,216
Hi, I'm Wendy.
Are we shopping for
a mother, a girlfriend?
228
00:10:33,258 --> 00:10:34,884
-Actually, my wife.
-Oh!
229
00:10:34,926 --> 00:10:38,012
Yeah, we've got it
under control though,
so thank you so much.
230
00:10:38,054 --> 00:10:43,268
Oh, well, very well then.
If you need me,
I'll be right here.
231
00:10:43,310 --> 00:10:48,273
I know how hard it can be
for two men in a women's
clothing store.
232
00:10:48,315 --> 00:10:49,899
Well, I'm actually
in really good hands,
233
00:10:49,941 --> 00:10:52,444
because this man
has a woman's touch.
234
00:10:52,486 --> 00:10:54,571
I don't, I don't know
what that means.
235
00:10:58,199 --> 00:11:00,034
Okay, so we're gonna take
these pieces.
236
00:11:00,076 --> 00:11:04,664
Oh, well, I have to ask,
is this for a funeral?
237
00:11:04,705 --> 00:11:07,875
Because we do offer
bereavement discounts.
238
00:11:07,917 --> 00:11:09,336
No, why would you
think that?
239
00:11:09,377 --> 00:11:12,422
Well, just very sombre,
serious pieces.
240
00:11:13,381 --> 00:11:14,715
Well, we don't want that!
241
00:11:14,757 --> 00:11:17,135
-Well, they're not...
-If you're willing,
242
00:11:17,177 --> 00:11:21,306
I have a few new pieces
that just came in, I'd love
for you to see them.
243
00:11:21,348 --> 00:11:23,891
I just don't know if we need
to be adding any more
options to the mix.
244
00:11:23,933 --> 00:11:25,268
Well, if she's offering,
what's the problem?
245
00:11:25,310 --> 00:11:28,605
Everything in here is like
one big, tacky blouse.
246
00:11:28,647 --> 00:11:31,358
Oh, come on, that's silly.
(GASPS)
247
00:11:31,399 --> 00:11:35,195
Now, I know you men
like to play it safe,
248
00:11:35,236 --> 00:11:38,615
but I just thought,
why not shake it up?
249
00:11:38,657 --> 00:11:41,075
-Ugh!
-Oh, I like these!
250
00:11:41,993 --> 00:11:43,286
-Um...
-Hmm? Mhmm!
251
00:11:43,328 --> 00:11:45,622
-Are they durable?
-Oh, well,
252
00:11:45,664 --> 00:11:48,749
durability is a given here
at The Blouse Barn.
253
00:11:48,791 --> 00:11:51,378
-And if you're asking
my opinion...
-Are we, though?
254
00:11:52,629 --> 00:11:55,714
It's between these two.
255
00:11:55,756 --> 00:11:59,260
Well, this is a real
Sophie's Choice!
256
00:11:59,302 --> 00:12:01,596
I hope that you and Jocelyn
don't role play that
at home.
257
00:12:01,638 --> 00:12:03,682
Hell, we've played
every Streep movie.
258
00:12:03,722 --> 00:12:05,517
-Oh, okay.
-Um,
259
00:12:05,559 --> 00:12:08,769
would you describe either
of those as "quick release?"
260
00:12:08,811 --> 00:12:11,648
Funnily enough,
both have snaps.
261
00:12:11,690 --> 00:12:13,650
Oh, great!
262
00:12:13,692 --> 00:12:15,734
Well, then I guess I um...
263
00:12:17,404 --> 00:12:18,613
Well...
264
00:12:19,780 --> 00:12:21,991
Uh, which one do you like?
265
00:12:25,161 --> 00:12:26,787
I don't know, it's such
a tough choice.
266
00:12:27,581 --> 00:12:29,374
Oh, you're telling me!
267
00:12:29,416 --> 00:12:32,001
It's just that I'm finding
both of these options
to be a little, um...
268
00:12:32,835 --> 00:12:34,170
What?
269
00:12:34,212 --> 00:12:35,838
Well, I don't know,
we've just spent
so much time
270
00:12:35,880 --> 00:12:39,718
and energy finding the few
pieces that aren't um...
271
00:12:39,758 --> 00:12:41,678
-Uh...
-What?
272
00:12:41,720 --> 00:12:44,347
I'm trying to find the word
to describe what I...
273
00:12:44,389 --> 00:12:46,140
Oh! Flirty? Sassy?
274
00:12:46,182 --> 00:12:48,393
Skanky! I think the clothes
are a bit skanky.
275
00:12:49,269 --> 00:12:50,437
Hmm.
276
00:12:52,355 --> 00:12:55,442
Well! Skanky.
277
00:12:55,483 --> 00:12:58,653
We'll um, take the
funereal skirt then,
278
00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:02,115
and the skanky blouse.
279
00:13:03,032 --> 00:13:04,867
-RAY: And sold!
-(GAVEL BANGS)
280
00:13:04,909 --> 00:13:07,662
To Johnny Rose,
for the price
of $15!
281
00:13:07,704 --> 00:13:09,205
Which uh, I hope
you can afford.
282
00:13:09,247 --> 00:13:11,332
You know, considering
your financial situation.
283
00:13:11,374 --> 00:13:13,543
Yeah, I get it, Ray.
I get it. I get it.
284
00:13:13,585 --> 00:13:16,087
I've got cash, and I'd just
like my cufflinks, please.
285
00:13:16,129 --> 00:13:18,381
RAY: And now, moving on
to bedroom items.
286
00:13:18,423 --> 00:13:23,802
First, we'll have a
brand new queen sized
memory foam mattress.
287
00:13:23,844 --> 00:13:25,764
We'll start the bidding
on the bed at $50.
288
00:13:26,765 --> 00:13:28,182
We have $50!
289
00:13:28,891 --> 00:13:30,644
-$60!
-Moira.
290
00:13:30,685 --> 00:13:33,104
MOIRA: Shh!
RAY: Oh, I smell
a bidding war!
291
00:13:33,146 --> 00:13:34,439
Do we have $70?
292
00:13:34,481 --> 00:13:36,357
-$70!
-$70! Do I have $75?
293
00:13:36,399 --> 00:13:38,859
-$75!
-Moira, what are you doing?
294
00:13:38,901 --> 00:13:40,987
We are currently sleeping
on a rectangular collection
295
00:13:41,028 --> 00:13:42,447
of knives and
barbed wire, John.
296
00:13:42,489 --> 00:13:44,073
$75, do we have $80?
297
00:13:44,115 --> 00:13:45,199
-$80!
-$80!
298
00:13:45,241 --> 00:13:47,368
-$90!
-Moira, we can't
afford this!
299
00:13:47,410 --> 00:13:49,370
-You got the cufflinks!
-For $15!
300
00:13:49,412 --> 00:13:50,829
-$90! Do we have $100?
-$100!
301
00:13:50,871 --> 00:13:53,874
-$100!
-You just bid against
yourself!
302
00:13:53,916 --> 00:13:55,293
RAY: Do I hear $105?
303
00:13:55,335 --> 00:13:57,754
Do you remember what we used
to sleep on? Texas kings!
304
00:13:57,796 --> 00:14:01,591
-$130!
-Wow, $130! Do I hear $135?
305
00:14:01,633 --> 00:14:02,967
-$140!
-$150!
306
00:14:03,009 --> 00:14:05,136
-$160!
-Moira, I'm begging you!
307
00:14:05,178 --> 00:14:07,221
Oh, she has a
decent bed, John,
308
00:14:07,263 --> 00:14:08,431
-she's just being greedy!
-RAY: $165, anyone?
309
00:14:08,473 --> 00:14:10,141
-$170!
-You did it again!
310
00:14:10,183 --> 00:14:11,643
-I know what I'm doing!
-$170! $180?
311
00:14:11,685 --> 00:14:13,728
-Ray, I think we're
done here!
-$180!
312
00:14:13,770 --> 00:14:15,689
$180! Do I hear $190?
313
00:14:16,606 --> 00:14:18,733
One-ninety... Two hundred!
314
00:14:18,775 --> 00:14:21,110
$200! Wow, Mrs Rose.
315
00:14:21,152 --> 00:14:23,655
You're really going for it,
which is surprising...
316
00:14:23,697 --> 00:14:26,658
Yeah, Ray, you know what,
that was just
a joke bid, so.
317
00:14:26,700 --> 00:14:28,284
Oh, I understand.
318
00:14:28,326 --> 00:14:31,996
Unfortunately that joke bid
is currently our highest
at $200!
319
00:14:32,038 --> 00:14:36,209
-Going once, going twice...
-$201!
320
00:14:36,250 --> 00:14:40,839
-$201 going once,
going twice,
-Don't!
321
00:14:40,880 --> 00:14:44,967
-Sold, to Jocelyn Schitt,
for $201.
322
00:14:45,593 --> 00:14:46,803
Fuck!
323
00:14:51,265 --> 00:14:53,601
Well, thank you for
this delightful trip.
324
00:14:53,643 --> 00:14:57,397
You know, I'm starting to
get the feeling that, uh,
you're a little upset.
325
00:14:57,438 --> 00:14:59,106
What would give you
that impression?
326
00:14:59,148 --> 00:15:01,275
Well, I first noticed it
when Heart came on,
327
00:15:01,317 --> 00:15:04,195
and nobody was taking
the high parts.
328
00:15:04,237 --> 00:15:07,323
-Oh, my God!
-Look, you should feel good
about yourself!
329
00:15:07,365 --> 00:15:09,576
Come on, you made some
great choices today.
330
00:15:09,617 --> 00:15:11,745
Nothing we bought today
came anywhere close
331
00:15:11,786 --> 00:15:12,995
to something Meryl Streep
would wear
332
00:15:13,037 --> 00:15:14,831
in The Devil Wears Prada.
Nothing!
333
00:15:14,873 --> 00:15:17,375
Oh jeez, you are so touchy!
334
00:15:17,417 --> 00:15:20,795
God, you're like a,
a fancy dinner plate
335
00:15:20,837 --> 00:15:25,091
that you don't wanna nudge
off the edge of the table.
336
00:15:25,132 --> 00:15:26,467
Okay, I don't know
what that means.
337
00:15:26,509 --> 00:15:29,178
Um, listen. I don't have
a lot to my name right now,
338
00:15:29,220 --> 00:15:30,764
but I do have one thing.
339
00:15:30,805 --> 00:15:34,058
-Self-respect?
-No, taste.
340
00:15:34,100 --> 00:15:36,185
And when that is
not appreciated,
341
00:15:36,227 --> 00:15:40,940
or worse,
publicly undermined.
Publicly.
342
00:15:40,981 --> 00:15:43,401
Uh, yeah. I might get
a little upset.
343
00:15:43,443 --> 00:15:45,236
Look, David. David!
344
00:15:45,278 --> 00:15:47,280
(SIGHING) Listen.
345
00:15:47,321 --> 00:15:50,032
If I wasn't so easily swayed
by powerful women
346
00:15:50,074 --> 00:15:53,160
in a retail environment,
I would've been there
for you.
347
00:15:53,202 --> 00:15:57,290
Okay? Because I honestly
believe that you really do
348
00:15:57,331 --> 00:15:59,876
have a very, very sharp eye.
349
00:16:01,836 --> 00:16:04,255
Thank you, that's nice
of you to say.
350
00:16:04,297 --> 00:16:06,257
Trust me, when Joc sees
this blouse,
351
00:16:06,299 --> 00:16:08,468
I'm gonna make sure
she knows you're the one
that picked it out.
352
00:16:08,509 --> 00:16:10,970
-I didn't pick that blouse.
-I know, but I'm gonna tell
her you did.
353
00:16:11,011 --> 00:16:12,931
Okay, thanks so much.
354
00:16:19,687 --> 00:16:22,356
-This is ridiculous!
-This is how you learn.
355
00:16:22,398 --> 00:16:24,108
Everyone is looking
at me, Mutt!
356
00:16:24,150 --> 00:16:25,359
No one is looking at you!
357
00:16:25,401 --> 00:16:28,237
-Ugh!
-TWYLA: Is everything okay?
358
00:16:28,279 --> 00:16:30,657
People were saying that
a girl was struggling
with her bike.
359
00:16:30,698 --> 00:16:32,867
I kinda just assumed
it was a toddler.
360
00:16:32,909 --> 00:16:35,328
No, I am a grown adult
young woman.
361
00:16:35,369 --> 00:16:38,247
Okay, this is how my dad
taught me, and this
is how I'm teaching you.
362
00:16:38,289 --> 00:16:41,668
-(ALEXIS GROANING)
-I'm glad I knew how to ride
a bike when we dated.
363
00:16:41,709 --> 00:16:45,922
Yeah, I don't really trust
your dad in terms of, like,
teachable moments.
364
00:16:45,964 --> 00:16:49,008
TWYLA: You know, one of my
mom's boyfriends had
a really great trick.
365
00:16:49,049 --> 00:16:50,593
He used to say,
"One foot on the ground,
366
00:16:50,635 --> 00:16:53,471
"one foot on the pedal,
now get the hell
outta here!"
367
00:16:53,513 --> 00:16:55,640
Hey, that's fun,
I like that,
let's try that.
368
00:16:55,682 --> 00:16:56,850
MUTT: Okay fine,
I'm just saying,
369
00:16:56,891 --> 00:16:58,518
if it's something
you never did before...
370
00:16:58,559 --> 00:17:00,603
TWYLA: There you go!
MUTT: Okay, wait!
371
00:17:00,645 --> 00:17:04,190
Are you coming,
or do I just keep,
like, driving straight?
372
00:17:04,231 --> 00:17:05,900
I didn't teach you
how to brake yet!
373
00:17:05,942 --> 00:17:08,569
Get the hell outta here,
you dumb broad!
374
00:17:08,611 --> 00:17:10,697
(CHUCKLING) That was another
thing he used to say.
375
00:17:16,327 --> 00:17:17,578
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
376
00:17:23,376 --> 00:17:25,169
-Hey.
-Roland!
377
00:17:25,211 --> 00:17:27,171
Johnny, um, do you
have a minute?
378
00:17:27,922 --> 00:17:29,382
-Yeah.
-Come here.
379
00:17:30,925 --> 00:17:33,678
-(COUGHS)
-What's going on?
380
00:17:33,720 --> 00:17:38,432
Well, Johnny, I'm
about to make you the most
popular guy in room six.
381
00:17:39,308 --> 00:17:40,852
Is this the mattress?
382
00:17:40,894 --> 00:17:43,396
Okay, yeah,
I've got a big heart,
383
00:17:43,437 --> 00:17:44,605
all right,
don't spread it around.
384
00:17:44,647 --> 00:17:46,607
I talked Jocelyn into
letting you have it.
385
00:17:48,317 --> 00:17:50,361
You're giving us
the mattress?
386
00:17:50,403 --> 00:17:53,155
Well, practically.
It's yours for $200.
387
00:17:54,657 --> 00:17:56,993
That's a dollar less
than you paid for it!
388
00:17:57,035 --> 00:17:58,828
Johnny, it's barely
out of the plastic.
389
00:17:59,787 --> 00:18:01,288
We can't afford it.
390
00:18:01,330 --> 00:18:05,209
Oh I see, you're the
master negotiator at work
here, huh?
391
00:18:05,251 --> 00:18:07,253
Okay, um, $195.
392
00:18:08,588 --> 00:18:09,839
We can't afford it!
393
00:18:09,881 --> 00:18:11,632
Okay, hardball, huh?
I'll play.
394
00:18:11,674 --> 00:18:13,467
Um, $182.50.
395
00:18:13,509 --> 00:18:15,553
-All right. Bye, Roland.
-50 bucks.
396
00:18:18,056 --> 00:18:19,306
50?
397
00:18:19,348 --> 00:18:21,517
Look, I'll level
with you, okay?
398
00:18:21,559 --> 00:18:25,855
Um, we tried it out as soon
as Jocelyn brought it home.
399
00:18:28,566 --> 00:18:30,192
You tried it out?
400
00:18:30,234 --> 00:18:32,403
Yeah, not enough bounce
for the bumps,
if you know what I mean.
401
00:18:32,445 --> 00:18:33,696
Hmm.
402
00:18:33,738 --> 00:18:35,448
But given your
advanced years,
403
00:18:35,489 --> 00:18:38,284
it might just be the thing
for you and Moira.
404
00:18:38,325 --> 00:18:40,411
Yeah well,
we're not that old,
405
00:18:41,203 --> 00:18:43,456
but $50?
406
00:18:48,086 --> 00:18:49,921
MOIRA: Kudos to you,
Mr Rose.
407
00:18:49,963 --> 00:18:53,549
I can't believe
I'm saying this,
but I'm so comfortable!
408
00:18:53,591 --> 00:18:55,885
Well, only the best
for you, my dear.
409
00:18:57,344 --> 00:19:00,222
Yet they didn't want it?
410
00:19:00,264 --> 00:19:03,350
Oh, I think they just
felt sorry for us.
411
00:19:03,392 --> 00:19:05,645
Well that seems
strange, John.
412
00:19:05,686 --> 00:19:09,231
Especially since Jocelyn
paid over $200 for it.
413
00:19:09,273 --> 00:19:11,150
You know what I think,
I think they tried it out,
414
00:19:11,191 --> 00:19:13,027
and, uh, it just didn't
work for them.
415
00:19:18,032 --> 00:19:21,201
And by tried it out,
you mean...
416
00:19:23,245 --> 00:19:24,872
I mean they...
417
00:19:26,499 --> 00:19:29,585
-Tried it out.
-Ew! Oh, God!
418
00:19:29,627 --> 00:19:32,130
No! Oh! Oh!
419
00:19:32,171 --> 00:19:34,256
Oh, God. That's memory
foam, John!
420
00:19:34,298 --> 00:19:36,634
Oh, Moira. We've stayed
at The Kennedy Compound.
421
00:19:36,676 --> 00:19:38,469
-Oh!
-This can't be any
worse than that!
422
00:19:38,511 --> 00:19:40,179
The Kennedys aren't Roland!
423
00:19:40,220 --> 00:19:42,765
The Kennedys have regular
medicals, daily laundering!
424
00:19:42,807 --> 00:19:44,809
This has gotta be better
than the motel mattress
425
00:19:44,851 --> 00:19:48,896
we were using, I mean,
who knows who
tried that out!
426
00:19:48,938 --> 00:19:50,773
Is that supposed to be
helping me?
427
00:19:50,815 --> 00:19:53,985
Moira, this is a $50
gift from heaven.
428
00:19:54,819 --> 00:19:56,278
I mean, look, hey!
429
00:19:56,320 --> 00:19:59,073
I don't feel any springs,
no nails, no bolts!
430
00:20:00,116 --> 00:20:02,827
It's comfy, come to bed.
431
00:20:02,869 --> 00:20:04,704
Tomorrow we get
a mattress cover.
432
00:20:04,745 --> 00:20:07,581
Yes, yes, that's the spirit.
433
00:20:08,290 --> 00:20:09,458
Oh...
434
00:20:11,460 --> 00:20:13,880
-Oh!
-Mmm!
435
00:20:15,715 --> 00:20:16,883
Ahh.
436
00:20:20,887 --> 00:20:23,181
Seriously, don't
think about it.
437
00:20:23,222 --> 00:20:24,640
ALEXIS: Okay, so you have
to keep it upright.
438
00:20:24,682 --> 00:20:25,766
I don't even wanna do this!
439
00:20:25,808 --> 00:20:27,518
David, you're gonna feel
so good, trust me.
440
00:20:27,560 --> 00:20:28,728
Oh, my God, you know
that I have bad
441
00:20:28,769 --> 00:20:30,021
foot-eye coordination,
you didn't have to wear
442
00:20:30,063 --> 00:20:31,731
corrective leg braces
for three months.
443
00:20:31,772 --> 00:20:34,274
You can't blame everything
on having been
pigeon-toed, David.
444
00:20:34,316 --> 00:20:36,069
-Oh, my God!
-JOHNNY: Kids, your mother
and I are gonna...
445
00:20:36,110 --> 00:20:38,487
Oh, my God. David,
what are you doing?
446
00:20:38,529 --> 00:20:40,114
I'm teaching him
how to ride a bike!
447
00:20:40,156 --> 00:20:42,783
Oh, please don't.
You know I can't stand
the sight of blood.
448
00:20:42,825 --> 00:20:44,744
Seriously, son, you're
gonna hurt yourself!
449
00:20:44,785 --> 00:20:46,412
David, it is one foot
on the pedal,
450
00:20:46,453 --> 00:20:48,414
and one foot on the ground,
and then get the hell
out of here!
451
00:20:48,455 --> 00:20:49,749
-Okay?
-I don't know what
that means.
452
00:20:49,790 --> 00:20:51,667
Okay, I'm gonna hold
the back.
453
00:20:51,709 --> 00:20:52,835
-Ugh!
-He's coming, come on,
come on!
454
00:20:52,877 --> 00:20:54,921
Oh, okay. Ah!
Ah! Ah!
455
00:20:54,962 --> 00:20:57,256
ALEXIS: David,
the pedals make it
move more!
456
00:20:57,297 --> 00:21:00,009
-John, he's doing it!
-You're doing it, son!
457
00:21:03,179 --> 00:21:04,304
Oh, my God.
458
00:21:06,515 --> 00:21:08,434
-Yay!
-Woo hoo hoo!
459
00:21:08,475 --> 00:21:09,977
Hey, someone get my camera!
460
00:21:10,019 --> 00:21:12,105
-DAVID: Nobody get
a camera!
-David! Over here!
461
00:21:13,480 --> 00:21:14,607
(CAMERA CLICKS)
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