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1
00:00:00,031 --> 00:00:02,448
(rock music)
2
00:00:34,213 --> 00:00:36,859
(upbeat music)
3
00:00:36,859 --> 00:00:39,599
(horse whinnying)
4
00:00:39,599 --> 00:00:42,182
(upbeat music)
5
00:00:47,059 --> 00:00:49,559
(car honking)
6
00:00:51,080 --> 00:00:53,288
- Aw, thank you ever so much for watching
7
00:00:53,288 --> 00:00:55,862
another fine late night feature.
8
00:00:55,862 --> 00:00:59,480
I hope you enjoyed watching
as much as we enjoyed
9
00:00:59,480 --> 00:01:00,319
showing it to you.
10
00:01:00,319 --> 00:01:01,240
Right, Lightening?
11
00:01:01,240 --> 00:01:05,070
Oh sure, Lightening enjoyed
showing it to you, too.
12
00:01:05,070 --> 00:01:06,849
(laughing)
13
00:01:06,849 --> 00:01:07,947
(gun bangs)
14
00:01:07,947 --> 00:01:11,239
You be sure and tune in
tomorrow for our action-packed
15
00:01:11,239 --> 00:01:15,190
late night movie, Dirty Duck.
16
00:01:15,190 --> 00:01:17,523
(screaming)
17
00:01:18,613 --> 00:01:23,613
(laughing) Now this is a
story of a big dime insurance
18
00:01:23,670 --> 00:01:27,859
man gone berserk on a rampage of rape,
19
00:01:27,859 --> 00:01:29,970
murder, and mayhem.
20
00:01:29,970 --> 00:01:34,124
Oh, it's gonna be a nasty one,
so you be sure to watch it.
21
00:01:34,124 --> 00:01:36,390
Lightening and I will be watching it.
22
00:01:36,390 --> 00:01:38,367
And now, good night, folks.
23
00:01:38,367 --> 00:01:39,780
See ya tomorrow.
24
00:01:39,780 --> 00:01:40,613
Right, Lightening?
25
00:01:40,613 --> 00:01:42,847
Now don't make--
(loud screeching)
26
00:01:42,847 --> 00:01:44,470
Don't make an old lady like--
27
00:01:44,470 --> 00:01:47,128
Oh, (faint speaking).
28
00:01:47,128 --> 00:01:48,366
(woman screaming)
(gun bangs)
29
00:01:48,366 --> 00:01:50,286
He says right too, folks (laughing).
30
00:01:50,286 --> 00:01:52,786
(piano music)
31
00:01:57,726 --> 00:02:00,309
(upbeat music)
32
00:02:02,170 --> 00:02:04,116
- [Willard] I don't prize the word cheap.
33
00:02:04,116 --> 00:02:08,020
It's just not a word of hope,
it's not a word of cheer, huh?
34
00:02:08,020 --> 00:02:11,250
It is the badge of poverty,
35
00:02:11,250 --> 00:02:13,140
the signal of distress, huh?
36
00:02:13,140 --> 00:02:15,560
Cheap service means cheap mean
37
00:02:15,560 --> 00:02:18,518
and cheap men mean a cheap country.
38
00:02:18,518 --> 00:02:23,518
- [Announcer] William
McKinley, 24th president
39
00:02:23,660 --> 00:02:28,660
of the United States was shot in the back
40
00:02:28,820 --> 00:02:33,317
by an assassin with a cheap hand gun.
41
00:02:34,778 --> 00:02:35,611
Bang.
42
00:02:45,080 --> 00:02:47,497
(rock music)
43
00:02:50,271 --> 00:02:53,355
♪ Now this is a cheap little movie ♪
44
00:02:53,355 --> 00:02:58,355
♪ And I am a cheap little guy ♪
45
00:02:59,240 --> 00:03:04,240
♪ I'm going to abuse your eardrums ♪
46
00:03:04,396 --> 00:03:09,396
♪ I'm going to make fun of your eyes ♪
47
00:03:10,750 --> 00:03:15,750
♪ This old movie is a great
big pile of shame, yeah ♪
48
00:03:19,768 --> 00:03:21,614
♪ But I'm glad to be with it ♪
49
00:03:21,614 --> 00:03:26,233
♪ And I'm proud to be a part of it ♪
50
00:03:26,233 --> 00:03:30,746
♪ Oh yeah, oh yeah ♪
51
00:03:30,746 --> 00:03:35,746
♪ Oh yeah, oh yeah ♪
52
00:03:36,744 --> 00:03:39,840
♪ It's great to have work in a movie ♪
53
00:03:39,840 --> 00:03:44,823
♪ It's great to have something to eat ♪
54
00:03:44,823 --> 00:03:47,056
♪ Eat ♪
55
00:03:47,056 --> 00:03:51,000
♪ I could just be out doing sessions ♪
56
00:03:51,000 --> 00:03:56,000
♪ Like all of the dots in the street ♪
57
00:03:57,373 --> 00:04:00,830
♪ It's true you may never understand ♪
58
00:04:00,830 --> 00:04:05,830
♪ What this film's about, yeah ♪
59
00:04:06,645 --> 00:04:08,517
♪ But I'm the guy singing ♪
60
00:04:08,517 --> 00:04:13,331
♪ And you're the dope
who paid to find out ♪
61
00:04:13,331 --> 00:04:14,997
♪ Oh yeah, oh yeah ♪
62
00:04:14,997 --> 00:04:17,496
♪ Oh yeah, oh yeah ♪
63
00:04:17,496 --> 00:04:22,496
♪ Oh yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
64
00:04:25,115 --> 00:04:26,860
♪ It's so cheap ♪
65
00:04:26,860 --> 00:04:31,860
♪ Yeah, yeah ♪
66
00:04:32,229 --> 00:04:35,925
♪ Yeah, it's so cheap ♪
67
00:04:35,925 --> 00:04:38,342
♪ Yeah, yeah ♪
68
00:04:39,318 --> 00:04:41,691
(lamp clicking)
69
00:04:41,691 --> 00:04:44,964
♪ Yeah, it's so cheap ♪
70
00:04:44,964 --> 00:04:47,381
(soft music)
71
00:04:56,475 --> 00:04:58,058
- Willard, wake up!
72
00:05:00,707 --> 00:05:02,040
This is the day.
73
00:05:03,080 --> 00:05:05,497
(soft music)
74
00:05:08,814 --> 00:05:10,981
(yawning)
75
00:05:14,557 --> 00:05:16,390
- Oh, this is the day.
76
00:05:18,397 --> 00:05:20,814
(rock music)
77
00:05:22,309 --> 00:05:25,256
♪ Wake up, it's a beautiful morning ♪
78
00:05:25,256 --> 00:05:29,496
♪ Everything good is coming your way ♪
79
00:05:29,496 --> 00:05:33,314
♪ Big smiles and sunshine ♪
80
00:05:33,314 --> 00:05:36,846
♪ And often been showing
how it's going today ♪
81
00:05:36,846 --> 00:05:39,464
♪ You know, you better be there ♪
82
00:05:39,464 --> 00:05:41,667
♪ Tonight, I'll see ya in Belize ♪
83
00:05:41,667 --> 00:05:45,138
♪ 'Cause it doesn't matter now ♪
84
00:05:45,138 --> 00:05:47,549
♪ This is the day that,
you said it's the way ♪
85
00:05:47,549 --> 00:05:52,549
♪ That you know it's better here ♪
86
00:05:54,192 --> 00:05:57,450
♪ Whoa, it seems so amazing ♪
87
00:05:57,450 --> 00:05:59,485
♪ The feelings you feeling ♪
88
00:05:59,485 --> 00:06:01,354
♪ Seem to flow naturally ♪
89
00:06:01,354 --> 00:06:04,804
♪ And Willard, it's elementary ♪
90
00:06:04,804 --> 00:06:08,602
♪ When she smiles at you, it
bet you smile back at me ♪
91
00:06:08,602 --> 00:06:11,687
♪ So don't you try too hard. ♪
92
00:06:11,687 --> 00:06:15,069
♪ You're about to cover
just the way you are ♪
93
00:06:15,069 --> 00:06:17,583
♪ Now I'm sure you made ♪
94
00:06:17,583 --> 00:06:21,263
♪ You gotta find the
things she can't forget ♪
95
00:06:21,263 --> 00:06:23,128
♪ No matter how she tries ♪
96
00:06:23,128 --> 00:06:26,324
♪ It's hard to describe
her feelings inside ♪
97
00:06:26,324 --> 00:06:28,660
♪ When she looks in your eyes ♪
98
00:06:28,660 --> 00:06:30,402
♪ And tells you her lies ♪
99
00:06:30,402 --> 00:06:32,362
♪ The love in your eyes ♪
100
00:06:32,362 --> 00:06:33,833
♪ She loves when her thighs ♪
101
00:06:33,833 --> 00:06:37,720
♪ Just how happy these could be ♪
102
00:06:37,720 --> 00:06:42,720
♪ This could be the day ♪
- This is the day.
103
00:06:44,220 --> 00:06:45,673
I'll do it!
104
00:06:45,673 --> 00:06:47,846
♪ The day, the day ♪
105
00:06:47,846 --> 00:06:50,050
♪ This could be the day ♪
106
00:06:50,050 --> 00:06:51,223
- I'll do it, yeah.
107
00:06:55,367 --> 00:06:58,683
I know it's the day, I
can feel it's the day.
108
00:07:00,610 --> 00:07:02,763
This is the day I'll do it.
109
00:07:02,763 --> 00:07:03,596
(farting)
110
00:07:03,596 --> 00:07:06,263
(alarm ringing)
111
00:07:07,235 --> 00:07:09,568
(gun bangs)
112
00:07:11,515 --> 00:07:12,419
- Yes, Daisy.
113
00:07:12,419 --> 00:07:14,020
I'm coming!
114
00:07:14,020 --> 00:07:15,950
Oh now, don't get upset.
115
00:07:15,950 --> 00:07:17,715
I'm coming, dearie.
116
00:07:17,715 --> 00:07:19,715
Oh, that's a good kitty.
117
00:07:20,738 --> 00:07:23,410
- Oh, oh, excuse me.
118
00:07:23,410 --> 00:07:25,699
- Oh, good morning, Willard!
119
00:07:25,699 --> 00:07:28,637
- I'm gonna really do it today
120
00:07:28,637 --> 00:07:30,375
- Do it?
121
00:07:30,375 --> 00:07:31,953
- Yes, ma'am.
122
00:07:31,953 --> 00:07:33,454
- Do what?
123
00:07:33,454 --> 00:07:35,848
- Ask her out today.
124
00:07:35,848 --> 00:07:39,940
Today, I'm gonna ask her to marry me.
125
00:07:39,940 --> 00:07:41,747
- Oh, buy Willard!
126
00:07:41,747 --> 00:07:45,000
You haven't even spoken to her before.
127
00:07:45,000 --> 00:07:47,643
- I know, but today is the day.
128
00:07:48,673 --> 00:07:50,670
(meowing)
129
00:07:50,670 --> 00:07:52,277
I knew it for sure when
I was sitting on the--
130
00:07:52,277 --> 00:07:54,883
Ooh!
- Well, you shouldn't rush
131
00:07:54,883 --> 00:07:57,190
those things, you know.
(cat yelping)
132
00:07:57,190 --> 00:08:01,350
- Yes, ma'am, I know, but
it thought about this one
133
00:08:01,350 --> 00:08:02,183
a long time.
134
00:08:02,183 --> 00:08:04,760
- Oh, but Willard, she
just started working
135
00:08:04,760 --> 00:08:06,140
with you this week.
136
00:08:06,140 --> 00:08:09,813
- Well sometimes,
sometimes a week is enough.
137
00:08:09,813 --> 00:08:11,813
- But it's only Tuesday!
138
00:08:14,919 --> 00:08:17,502
(upbeat music)
139
00:08:38,299 --> 00:08:41,382
(car engine choking)
140
00:08:45,344 --> 00:08:47,844
(rock music)
141
00:08:52,442 --> 00:08:53,725
(door slamming)
142
00:08:53,725 --> 00:08:54,944
(rock music)
143
00:08:54,944 --> 00:08:56,566
(loud banging)
144
00:08:56,566 --> 00:08:58,983
(rock music)
145
00:09:01,252 --> 00:09:04,002
(loud crunching)
146
00:09:05,007 --> 00:09:09,191
- It's only Tuesday!
- Yeah, it won't start.
147
00:09:09,191 --> 00:09:12,812
- It looks fine.
- But it won't start.
148
00:09:12,812 --> 00:09:15,083
(cat yelping)
- Oh Jaysie, be careful!
149
00:09:15,083 --> 00:09:18,820
You almost hurt poor
Willard and he's such a nice
150
00:09:18,820 --> 00:09:21,953
young man, don't you think so?
151
00:09:21,953 --> 00:09:24,022
- [Willard] Oh, bite the weenie.
152
00:09:24,022 --> 00:09:24,920
(gun bangs)
153
00:09:24,920 --> 00:09:26,742
This ain't the day.
154
00:09:26,742 --> 00:09:29,742
(melodic whistling)
155
00:09:35,140 --> 00:09:38,057
- [Woman] Willard, this is the day.
156
00:09:39,500 --> 00:09:40,750
- Well, you never know.
157
00:09:40,750 --> 00:09:42,699
It might be the day.
158
00:09:42,699 --> 00:09:45,090
(horn honking)
159
00:09:45,090 --> 00:09:46,732
Good morning.
160
00:09:46,732 --> 00:09:48,003
- Good morning.
161
00:09:50,029 --> 00:09:52,612
(horn honking)
162
00:09:56,347 --> 00:09:57,901
- Oh, hi there, sugar.
163
00:09:57,901 --> 00:10:00,163
Hi there, Miss American Pie.
164
00:10:00,163 --> 00:10:02,933
You're looking awful good this morning,
165
00:10:02,933 --> 00:10:05,955
a real treat-a-roonie!
- Oh!
166
00:10:05,955 --> 00:10:10,330
- Say listen there, Ms.
Pussy Cat, how's about you
167
00:10:10,330 --> 00:10:12,470
and I stepping out one night?
168
00:10:12,470 --> 00:10:14,970
I could show you one heck of a swell time.
169
00:10:14,970 --> 00:10:18,070
- Well--
- I mean, listen now,
170
00:10:18,070 --> 00:10:20,146
listen to me, listen to big daddy.
171
00:10:20,146 --> 00:10:23,160
I know some spots where a
good time and good time,
172
00:10:23,160 --> 00:10:26,757
good time, good time is
spelled out in red lights.
173
00:10:26,757 --> 00:10:29,495
I mean honey, they shine (mumbles).
174
00:10:29,495 --> 00:10:30,929
- Hey, buddy!
175
00:10:30,929 --> 00:10:33,150
- How's about it, toots?
176
00:10:33,150 --> 00:10:34,040
You and I?
177
00:10:34,040 --> 00:10:35,377
- Hey, hey, sport.
178
00:10:35,377 --> 00:10:38,350
I already got a date three
blocks up the street.
179
00:10:38,350 --> 00:10:39,670
- Well, I really don't.
180
00:10:39,670 --> 00:10:42,785
- We could blow this whole town wide open.
181
00:10:42,785 --> 00:10:43,993
Kaboom!
182
00:10:43,993 --> 00:10:45,160
- Hey, kaboom!
183
00:10:46,030 --> 00:10:47,741
Look, you getting on this bus?
184
00:10:47,741 --> 00:10:50,012
'Cause this bus is leaving now.
185
00:10:50,012 --> 00:10:52,036
- All right, all right.
- Look, don't yell
186
00:10:52,036 --> 00:10:53,712
at me, fella!
187
00:10:53,712 --> 00:10:56,584
- [Man] All right, all right!
188
00:10:56,584 --> 00:10:57,910
After you sugar puss.
189
00:10:57,910 --> 00:10:59,726
Just getting those golden
globes (faint speaking).
190
00:10:59,726 --> 00:11:00,952
- [Woman] Oh!
191
00:11:00,952 --> 00:11:03,175
(bus engine rumbling)
192
00:11:03,175 --> 00:11:05,529
(upbeat music)
193
00:11:05,529 --> 00:11:07,696
(roaring)
194
00:11:12,103 --> 00:11:14,686
(upbeat music)
195
00:11:17,040 --> 00:11:19,290
(growling)
196
00:11:20,821 --> 00:11:22,275
(laughing)
197
00:11:22,275 --> 00:11:25,525
(plane engine buzzing)
198
00:11:31,491 --> 00:11:33,356
(loud explosion)
199
00:11:33,356 --> 00:11:35,606
(growling)
200
00:11:37,858 --> 00:11:40,441
(guns banging)
201
00:11:46,609 --> 00:11:50,609
(faint speaking)
- Hold the bus!
202
00:11:54,534 --> 00:11:57,701
(bus engine rumbling)
203
00:11:59,363 --> 00:12:01,946
(choral music)
204
00:12:05,309 --> 00:12:09,114
(loud smacking)
(man shouting)
205
00:12:09,114 --> 00:12:11,697
(choral music)
206
00:12:13,916 --> 00:12:17,114
(loud smacking)
(man shouting)
207
00:12:17,114 --> 00:12:19,697
(choral music)
208
00:12:22,177 --> 00:12:23,370
(loud smacking)
(man shouting)
209
00:12:23,370 --> 00:12:26,257
- Heya, you're late again, Eisenbaum.
210
00:12:26,257 --> 00:12:28,840
- Yes, ma'am, I'm sorry, ma'am.
211
00:12:28,840 --> 00:12:30,394
My car, it wouldn't start, the bus--
212
00:12:30,394 --> 00:12:32,539
- Ah listen, Eisenbaum.
213
00:12:32,539 --> 00:12:35,150
Come here for a minute, all right?
214
00:12:35,150 --> 00:12:37,743
I wanna talk to you for a second.
215
00:12:37,743 --> 00:12:40,150
You see this little list
I have written up here?
216
00:12:40,150 --> 00:12:43,374
Well sweetheart, this is my shit list
217
00:12:43,374 --> 00:12:46,380
and you've been at the top of my shit list
218
00:12:46,380 --> 00:12:50,129
so long I'm gonna have to
make a new shit list, you see?
219
00:12:50,129 --> 00:12:55,039
Just for you like, a shit
list private stock, you know?
220
00:12:55,039 --> 00:12:56,740
- Yes, ma'am.
221
00:12:56,740 --> 00:12:57,760
- All right, listen.
222
00:12:57,760 --> 00:13:00,669
Get to work, Eisenbaum, and move your ass.
223
00:13:00,669 --> 00:13:03,252
(upbeat music)
224
00:13:07,709 --> 00:13:10,376
(bizarre music)
225
00:13:30,522 --> 00:13:33,575
(bell dinging)
226
00:13:33,575 --> 00:13:36,575
(melodic whistling)
227
00:13:45,755 --> 00:13:47,348
(soft music)
228
00:13:47,348 --> 00:13:50,515
(typewriter clacking)
229
00:13:53,487 --> 00:13:56,320
(clearing throat)
230
00:13:58,133 --> 00:14:02,890
(loud thudding
(shouting)
231
00:14:02,890 --> 00:14:03,900
- Oh listen, I'm sorry!
232
00:14:03,900 --> 00:14:04,733
I didn't see you.
233
00:14:04,733 --> 00:14:05,820
Here, let me help you.
234
00:14:05,820 --> 00:14:07,063
Listen, I'm real sorry.
235
00:14:07,063 --> 00:14:08,283
I didn't do it on purpose, all right?
236
00:14:08,283 --> 00:14:10,100
Will you stop yelling already?
237
00:14:10,100 --> 00:14:11,680
- Oh, it's all right, it's all right,
238
00:14:11,680 --> 00:14:12,929
it doesn't hurt, it's all right.
239
00:14:12,929 --> 00:14:15,193
It' all right, it doesn't hurt anymore.
240
00:14:16,230 --> 00:14:20,131
It feels good, it feels good.
241
00:14:20,131 --> 00:14:21,912
(shouting)
242
00:14:21,912 --> 00:14:24,033
Oh my golly, I'm sorry!
243
00:14:24,033 --> 00:14:25,560
I mean, I didn't mean to.
244
00:14:25,560 --> 00:14:26,880
Oh please, oh please, sit down.
245
00:14:26,880 --> 00:14:28,907
Oh gee wiz, I'm sory!
246
00:14:28,907 --> 00:14:31,030
Jeepers, I'm sorry!
247
00:14:31,030 --> 00:14:32,710
Willikers!
248
00:14:32,710 --> 00:14:34,918
Oh my gosh!
249
00:14:34,918 --> 00:14:37,168
(shouting)
250
00:14:38,430 --> 00:14:40,810
- Look buddy, nobody gets head from Suzy
251
00:14:40,810 --> 00:14:42,340
on the first date.
252
00:14:42,340 --> 00:14:44,776
- Okay, how's about you and I--
253
00:14:44,776 --> 00:14:49,776
out tonight, I mean, I
know how to light you up.
254
00:14:49,820 --> 00:14:52,283
Good times, admid you shine?
255
00:14:54,670 --> 00:14:56,113
How about it, toots?
256
00:14:57,040 --> 00:15:01,010
You and I, we can blow
this burg right open.
257
00:15:01,010 --> 00:15:02,660
We could suck it inside out!
258
00:15:02,660 --> 00:15:04,650
- You know something, buddy?
259
00:15:04,650 --> 00:15:08,893
You're a real schmuck and
if you don't quit kissing
260
00:15:08,893 --> 00:15:11,780
the hem of my dress, you know something?
261
00:15:11,780 --> 00:15:13,825
I'm gonna knock your goddamn teeth out.
262
00:15:13,825 --> 00:15:14,658
- Oh.
263
00:15:17,530 --> 00:15:19,543
I guess this isn't the day.
264
00:15:19,543 --> 00:15:21,416
(typewriter clacking)
265
00:15:21,416 --> 00:15:24,394
Oh, maybe she had a headache.
266
00:15:24,394 --> 00:15:27,290
(phone ringing)
267
00:15:27,290 --> 00:15:28,123
Hello?
268
00:15:28,123 --> 00:15:28,956
(woman jabbering)
269
00:15:28,956 --> 00:15:29,789
Yeah?
270
00:15:29,789 --> 00:15:30,622
Oh, I'm sorry.
271
00:15:30,622 --> 00:15:32,415
I mean, I'm really, really sorry.
272
00:15:32,415 --> 00:15:36,360
I'm not really like that,
I'm suave at everything.
273
00:15:36,360 --> 00:15:38,781
I'm sorry, once you get
to know me, I'm the--
274
00:15:38,781 --> 00:15:40,755
(woman jabbering)
Oh, I'm sorry.
275
00:15:40,755 --> 00:15:41,701
(woman jabbering)
276
00:15:41,701 --> 00:15:43,744
(dial tone buzzing)
277
00:15:43,744 --> 00:15:44,614
(phone ringing)
278
00:15:44,614 --> 00:15:45,827
(loud mumbling)
Yes ma'am,
279
00:15:45,827 --> 00:15:49,023
I'll be right there, yes, ma'am.
280
00:15:50,890 --> 00:15:54,600
- Oh, Willard, you know,
this bullshit's gotta stop
281
00:15:54,600 --> 00:15:55,672
sometimes, you know?
282
00:15:55,672 --> 00:15:59,541
You can go around kissing
the secretaries' hems.
283
00:15:59,541 --> 00:16:03,092
Oh, really, why that little pair of tits
284
00:16:03,092 --> 00:16:06,176
went directly to my boss.
285
00:16:06,176 --> 00:16:10,610
You're in some pretty
deep shit, Eisenbaum.
286
00:16:10,610 --> 00:16:12,230
- Yes, ma'am.
287
00:16:12,230 --> 00:16:14,000
- Here, all right, listen.
288
00:16:14,000 --> 00:16:16,010
Don't worry, go out on this claim
289
00:16:16,010 --> 00:16:17,854
and don't come back today.
290
00:16:17,854 --> 00:16:20,239
Maybe it'll blow over, you know?
291
00:16:20,239 --> 00:16:23,160
Maybe no one'll notice you tomorrow.
292
00:16:23,160 --> 00:16:24,083
- Yes, ma'am.
293
00:16:25,229 --> 00:16:27,720
- Oh, Willard?
- Yes, ma'am?
294
00:16:27,720 --> 00:16:29,470
- So what's the matter with my hem?
295
00:16:30,644 --> 00:16:33,460
(upbeat music)
296
00:16:33,460 --> 00:16:35,671
- Painless Martha's?
297
00:16:35,671 --> 00:16:38,088
(rock music)
298
00:16:40,585 --> 00:16:44,296
♪ La la la la ♪
299
00:16:44,296 --> 00:16:49,102
♪ La la la la ♪
300
00:16:49,102 --> 00:16:54,102
♪ La la la la ♪
301
00:16:54,318 --> 00:16:59,318
♪ We're all living in a jungle ♪
302
00:17:03,401 --> 00:17:07,972
♪ Sugar whites, snapping whites ♪
303
00:17:07,972 --> 00:17:12,972
♪ Snorting whites, gun it down whites ♪
304
00:17:13,497 --> 00:17:14,330
♪ Ooh ♪
305
00:17:14,330 --> 00:17:16,120
- That train's a-rolling!
306
00:17:16,120 --> 00:17:18,590
Oh yeah (mumbles) down.
307
00:17:18,590 --> 00:17:21,487
Mama's (mumbles) yeah, sweet it.
308
00:17:21,487 --> 00:17:22,857
Hey, man!
309
00:17:22,857 --> 00:17:27,197
Hey, hey, man, hey baby,
you want to buy some gas?
310
00:17:28,083 --> 00:17:30,583
Hey brother, oh (mumbles).
311
00:17:30,583 --> 00:17:32,640
How about, would you like
312
00:17:32,640 --> 00:17:35,240
to take onto your nostrils and coke?
313
00:17:35,240 --> 00:17:37,260
Would you like to sniff up some of that
314
00:17:37,260 --> 00:17:38,217
hard snowbird, baby?
315
00:17:38,217 --> 00:17:40,158
Hey baby like, how much
money you got, you know?
316
00:17:40,158 --> 00:17:42,492
- Well, I don't--
- yeah, come on, baby!
317
00:17:42,492 --> 00:17:45,807
Get my black ass over there
on Welfare Road, you know?
318
00:17:45,807 --> 00:17:47,660
'Cause if you don't,
I'm gonna have to sell
319
00:17:47,660 --> 00:17:50,388
yeah black sister's
ass and she a braggart,
320
00:17:50,388 --> 00:17:52,092
she don't like to hump,
especially hunkin'!
321
00:17:52,092 --> 00:17:54,760
I's her brother, I got her same teeth,
322
00:17:54,760 --> 00:17:57,128
much whiter, only I got these thick lips
323
00:17:57,128 --> 00:17:58,995
that can swallow you in
a moment if you don't
324
00:17:58,995 --> 00:18:00,980
give me your (mumbles).
325
00:18:00,980 --> 00:18:03,412
Black and purple as I is,
I still is your brother.
326
00:18:03,412 --> 00:18:05,860
- Well, I'm afraid--
- You know boss,
327
00:18:05,860 --> 00:18:07,508
whatever you got, you just give it to me
328
00:18:07,508 --> 00:18:09,360
and I'll get you high.
329
00:18:09,360 --> 00:18:10,790
I mean, like you never got.
330
00:18:10,790 --> 00:18:12,377
- No, I really don't--
- Come on, baby.
331
00:18:12,377 --> 00:18:14,537
You look like you're doing pretty well!
332
00:18:14,537 --> 00:18:16,458
(croaking)
But you're tight
333
00:18:16,458 --> 00:18:17,291
and you're tense, you know?
334
00:18:17,291 --> 00:18:18,124
- No, no, no,
335
00:18:18,124 --> 00:18:19,423
I'm not tense at all.
- You got to relax
336
00:18:19,423 --> 00:18:23,090
and lay back, you gotta
help a brother, baby.
337
00:18:23,090 --> 00:18:24,440
I ain't asking much.
338
00:18:24,440 --> 00:18:26,190
You give a lot, you get a lot!
339
00:18:26,190 --> 00:18:28,510
- No, no, no.
- Come on, baby.
340
00:18:28,510 --> 00:18:29,980
Don't go away from me.
341
00:18:29,980 --> 00:18:31,070
- No, no, no.
- Don't go away,
342
00:18:31,070 --> 00:18:32,050
sweetie, come on!
343
00:18:32,050 --> 00:18:32,898
I ain't unnatural.
344
00:18:32,898 --> 00:18:36,151
I is laying some heavy jazz on you.
345
00:18:36,151 --> 00:18:36,984
This is reality.
346
00:18:36,984 --> 00:18:38,301
See this car?
347
00:18:38,301 --> 00:18:39,599
It's gonna explode!
348
00:18:39,599 --> 00:18:40,432
(loud booming)
349
00:18:40,432 --> 00:18:41,265
We get your head under them track trains
350
00:18:41,265 --> 00:18:43,162
and it goes sploosh all over this world.
351
00:18:43,162 --> 00:18:44,602
(loud booming)
This is reality,
352
00:18:44,602 --> 00:18:46,797
this is today throwing up in the gutter!
353
00:18:46,797 --> 00:18:49,496
This is everything, cars
screeching and knocking
354
00:18:49,496 --> 00:18:50,830
kids off bicycles.
355
00:18:50,830 --> 00:18:53,040
You can't make that reality go away.
356
00:18:53,040 --> 00:18:55,310
I can, I am the redeemer!
357
00:18:55,310 --> 00:18:58,417
I is heaven, ooh, ooh.
358
00:18:58,417 --> 00:19:01,084
(faint singing)
359
00:19:03,116 --> 00:19:05,147
♪ Right on, right on ♪
360
00:19:05,147 --> 00:19:07,000
(choral music)
361
00:19:07,000 --> 00:19:09,950
- Hey baby, are you sure
you're on the right car?
362
00:19:09,950 --> 00:19:11,704
- No.
- You want to be
363
00:19:11,704 --> 00:19:14,160
on the right car?
- Yeah.
364
00:19:14,160 --> 00:19:16,028
- Well, just give me all the money you got
365
00:19:16,028 --> 00:19:18,857
and I'll get you on the right ca!
366
00:19:20,323 --> 00:19:21,937
Ooh, a dollar 37?
367
00:19:21,937 --> 00:19:23,600
Oh (laughing).
368
00:19:23,600 --> 00:19:27,140
Oh, you a big spender,
you a real high roller!
369
00:19:27,140 --> 00:19:29,000
You a Howard Hoogas, aren't ya?
370
00:19:29,000 --> 00:19:30,515
Hmm, hmm?
371
00:19:30,515 --> 00:19:31,910
(upbeat music)
372
00:19:31,910 --> 00:19:34,720
Okay brothers and sisters, make way!
373
00:19:34,720 --> 00:19:37,404
I'm gonna part your black
asses because this here boy
374
00:19:37,404 --> 00:19:40,940
is Eldridge Cleaver's albino brother.
375
00:19:40,940 --> 00:19:42,403
He got to get to a meeting.
376
00:19:42,403 --> 00:19:45,121
He's got to get a meeting,
a meeting, a meeting.
377
00:19:45,121 --> 00:19:46,973
Let's hear it for the
freakin' meeting, baby!
378
00:19:48,060 --> 00:19:50,539
I will part these black faces like Moses
379
00:19:50,539 --> 00:19:54,060
parted them Hebrews, them (mumbles),
380
00:19:54,060 --> 00:19:55,490
them Jew, Baptists!
381
00:19:55,490 --> 00:19:56,833
You get me that meeting, baby!
382
00:19:56,833 --> 00:19:57,916
(lips smacking)
383
00:19:57,916 --> 00:20:00,047
Come on, mama, move your black ass!
384
00:20:00,047 --> 00:20:01,807
- I can't move!
385
00:20:01,807 --> 00:20:04,467
- Hey, where you gwine anyway?
386
00:20:04,467 --> 00:20:05,550
Oh, (laughing)!
387
00:20:07,049 --> 00:20:08,798
I don believe it!
388
00:20:08,798 --> 00:20:10,858
Painless Martha's!
389
00:20:10,858 --> 00:20:13,370
Ooh, hoo, hoo, hoo, hoo!
390
00:20:13,370 --> 00:20:14,286
Wee!
391
00:20:14,286 --> 00:20:16,661
Well, you get on that car right over there
392
00:20:16,661 --> 00:20:18,952
and get off when it stops.
393
00:20:18,952 --> 00:20:20,593
- Okay, and thanks.
394
00:20:20,593 --> 00:20:23,690
- Oh, sho' enough, yes sir, and boy,
395
00:20:23,690 --> 00:20:25,150
can I clean your windshield?
396
00:20:25,150 --> 00:20:27,125
And by the way, say hello to the duck.
397
00:20:27,125 --> 00:20:29,447
- Huh?
(doors slamming)
398
00:20:29,447 --> 00:20:32,030
(upbeat music)
399
00:20:43,462 --> 00:20:48,462
♪ Lord said duck go out and play ♪
400
00:20:49,278 --> 00:20:54,278
♪ In the universe today ♪
401
00:20:55,900 --> 00:21:00,900
♪ He had such enormous fun ♪
402
00:21:02,138 --> 00:21:07,138
♪ He asked his friend Willard to come ♪
403
00:21:08,542 --> 00:21:12,821
♪ You're nothing but a good duck ♪
404
00:21:12,821 --> 00:21:15,081
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
405
00:21:15,081 --> 00:21:19,422
♪ You nothing but a good duck ♪
406
00:21:19,422 --> 00:21:22,041
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
407
00:21:22,041 --> 00:21:26,337
♪ You're nothing but a good duck ♪
408
00:21:26,337 --> 00:21:28,798
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
409
00:21:28,798 --> 00:21:33,118
♪ You're nothing but a good duck ♪
410
00:21:33,118 --> 00:21:38,118
♪ Follow me, the duck can save me ♪
411
00:21:40,003 --> 00:21:45,003
♪ And I will lead you to the way ♪
412
00:21:46,780 --> 00:21:51,780
♪ But don't you try and go too far ♪
413
00:21:52,825 --> 00:21:57,825
♪ After all, it's a duck that you are ♪
414
00:21:59,209 --> 00:22:00,670
♪ You're nothing but a good duck ♪
415
00:22:00,670 --> 00:22:02,044
- Come on, for Christ's sakes, Martha.
416
00:22:02,044 --> 00:22:03,747
You put the mouse on.
417
00:22:03,747 --> 00:22:06,040
Now I need a panner underneath it.
418
00:22:06,040 --> 00:22:06,873
You know what I mean?
419
00:22:06,873 --> 00:22:08,723
Like, with a little flag on the ends
420
00:22:08,723 --> 00:22:11,430
that says, let's see,
death before dishonor.
421
00:22:11,430 --> 00:22:13,430
Aw, or born to lose.
422
00:22:13,430 --> 00:22:16,800
Oh, maybe mom, yeah, oh, mom!
423
00:22:16,800 --> 00:22:20,393
Mom would be good!
- Shut up, duck.
424
00:22:20,393 --> 00:22:21,687
- Come on, Martha.
425
00:22:21,687 --> 00:22:24,350
All the guys on the ship
saying the mouse is dumb.
426
00:22:24,350 --> 00:22:26,021
Look at it, the mouse bites!
427
00:22:26,021 --> 00:22:28,020
I gotta have something neat to go with it.
428
00:22:28,020 --> 00:22:29,730
- Oh, duck!
429
00:22:29,730 --> 00:22:31,366
Would you shut up?
430
00:22:31,366 --> 00:22:33,223
Can't you see I'm busy?
431
00:22:33,223 --> 00:22:35,150
- But you said you'd--
- Oh, duck!
432
00:22:35,150 --> 00:22:40,150
Ah, did anybody ever tell
you you're a pain in the ass?
433
00:22:41,840 --> 00:22:43,846
- Oh, hey mom, come on.
434
00:22:43,846 --> 00:22:45,731
I didn't mean anything by it.
435
00:22:45,731 --> 00:22:49,042
- Okay, okay, okay, I'm busy!
436
00:22:49,042 --> 00:22:53,730
Don't you realize this is life and death?
437
00:22:53,730 --> 00:22:56,180
- Shit mom, I'm sorry.
438
00:22:56,180 --> 00:22:57,460
- Now look here, look here, look at me.
439
00:22:57,460 --> 00:23:01,607
I'm dying right before
your eyes and you want me
440
00:23:01,607 --> 00:23:04,640
to poke needles in your arm.
441
00:23:04,640 --> 00:23:07,320
- You look okay to me, mom.
- Well, I'm not.
442
00:23:07,320 --> 00:23:11,563
The Weegee board says I'm dying!
443
00:23:12,750 --> 00:23:14,429
- Yeah?
- Yeah, yeah.
444
00:23:14,429 --> 00:23:19,429
It says you will die of a bum delivered
445
00:23:20,060 --> 00:23:23,321
by a wizard Tuesday.
446
00:23:23,321 --> 00:23:24,680
- Oh come on, mom.
447
00:23:24,680 --> 00:23:27,263
You don't really believe
a Weegee Board, do ya?
448
00:23:27,263 --> 00:23:29,456
- Oh, hell I don't!
449
00:23:29,456 --> 00:23:32,320
Last time I didn't believe a Weegee board
450
00:23:32,320 --> 00:23:36,300
that said I'd have a good duck.
451
00:23:36,300 --> 00:23:37,133
- Huh, huh?
452
00:23:37,133 --> 00:23:39,217
- So I believe (laughing).
453
00:23:40,437 --> 00:23:41,821
I believe!
454
00:23:41,821 --> 00:23:42,654
- Oh, but mom!
455
00:23:42,654 --> 00:23:43,610
There's no wizard.
(loud knocking)
456
00:23:43,610 --> 00:23:44,823
There's no wizard.
457
00:23:45,660 --> 00:23:47,798
- Oh well, Duck!
458
00:23:47,798 --> 00:23:49,729
Call me Martha.
459
00:23:49,729 --> 00:23:53,187
I mean, people talk (laughing).
460
00:23:53,187 --> 00:23:55,860
(loud knocking)
461
00:23:55,860 --> 00:23:56,860
- Hi, Sailor!
462
00:23:56,860 --> 00:23:58,641
Hey, what'll it be, a panther
stuck to your arm, huh?
463
00:23:58,641 --> 00:24:00,175
- I don't--
- Huh, how about a snake
464
00:24:00,175 --> 00:24:01,700
crawling around your leg, huh?
465
00:24:01,700 --> 00:24:02,533
- I'm not here for--
- Hey, about about
466
00:24:02,533 --> 00:24:04,252
bluebirds, battleship, huh?
467
00:24:04,252 --> 00:24:05,085
Hey!
- No.
468
00:24:05,085 --> 00:24:06,230
- What's your girlfriend's name, huh?
469
00:24:06,230 --> 00:24:08,632
Hey, I know, a chain around
your ankle, huh, huh?
470
00:24:08,632 --> 00:24:10,294
(faint speaking)
Hey, let's show your butt.
471
00:24:10,294 --> 00:24:11,810
Hey, right here, right here
472
00:24:11,810 --> 00:24:12,663
and a little bug,
- No, nothing.
473
00:24:12,663 --> 00:24:13,496
No.
- We can put
474
00:24:13,496 --> 00:24:14,329
a butterfly, huh?
- No.
475
00:24:14,329 --> 00:24:15,162
- What do you say, huh?
476
00:24:15,162 --> 00:24:16,250
(mumbles) Over here.
477
00:24:16,250 --> 00:24:18,325
Hey, what about a wart on the end, huh?
478
00:24:18,325 --> 00:24:21,102
Hey, what'll it be,
how about it, huh, huh?
479
00:24:21,102 --> 00:24:26,102
- Excuse me, are you Painless Martha?
480
00:24:26,870 --> 00:24:28,390
- Oh, oh, no.
481
00:24:28,390 --> 00:24:29,797
Hey--
- Yes?
482
00:24:29,797 --> 00:24:31,890
Mm-hmm, huh, yes?
483
00:24:31,890 --> 00:24:35,810
- Well, my name is Willard
Eisenbaum and I represent
484
00:24:35,810 --> 00:24:37,540
a big-time insurance company.
485
00:24:37,540 --> 00:24:40,160
- Yes?
- Well, it says here
486
00:24:40,160 --> 00:24:43,940
that you filed a claim
listing yourself as dead.
487
00:24:43,940 --> 00:24:46,759
- Yes, I will be any moment!
488
00:24:46,759 --> 00:24:48,590
It's Tuesday!
489
00:24:48,590 --> 00:24:51,300
You see that duck?
- Yeah, how could I help it?
490
00:24:51,300 --> 00:24:53,940
- Well, ooh, isn't he a beauty?
491
00:24:53,940 --> 00:24:55,620
- Yeah.
- It's the proof!
492
00:24:55,620 --> 00:24:58,749
- Ma'am, I'm sorry, you must
realize the company's position.
493
00:24:58,749 --> 00:25:01,540
- Position my ass.
494
00:25:01,540 --> 00:25:03,620
I'm telling you.
- But the company
495
00:25:03,620 --> 00:25:05,160
does not believe in Ouija.
496
00:25:05,160 --> 00:25:07,871
- Well, the company better believe me!
497
00:25:07,871 --> 00:25:09,490
- Madam.
- I paid a lot
498
00:25:09,490 --> 00:25:12,060
of money for this policy
and it better pay up.
499
00:25:12,060 --> 00:25:13,790
- I'm sorry, Madam.
- You get outta here
500
00:25:13,790 --> 00:25:16,810
and don't come back
until you have the money.
501
00:25:16,810 --> 00:25:18,810
- Well gladly, but you'll
get nothing from us
502
00:25:18,810 --> 00:25:19,701
until you're dead!
503
00:25:19,701 --> 00:25:22,729
(loud banging)
(Martha shouting)
504
00:25:22,729 --> 00:25:23,646
- Mom!
- Ow!
505
00:25:25,500 --> 00:25:30,500
- Mom!
(Martha shouting)
506
00:25:31,941 --> 00:25:32,858
- You, you.
507
00:25:36,231 --> 00:25:37,814
You are the wizard.
508
00:25:38,985 --> 00:25:39,902
- Me?
- You!
509
00:25:40,837 --> 00:25:43,670
(Martha croaking)
510
00:25:47,928 --> 00:25:50,119
- Willard, he was a hum,
511
00:25:50,119 --> 00:25:51,619
Willard Eisenbaum.
512
00:25:53,468 --> 00:25:56,301
Oh, oh, the Ouija board was right.
513
00:26:00,158 --> 00:26:01,325
It is Tuesday.
514
00:26:04,620 --> 00:26:06,370
Willard, it's in my--
515
00:26:07,970 --> 00:26:10,363
- Huh, me?
516
00:26:11,412 --> 00:26:14,858
- Oh, you asshole, you
didn't mind last night.
517
00:26:14,858 --> 00:26:16,941
♪ Martha ♪
518
00:26:18,368 --> 00:26:21,809
(Martha groaning)
519
00:26:21,809 --> 00:26:22,642
- Mom!
520
00:26:24,201 --> 00:26:26,284
- Please, call me Martha.
521
00:26:28,586 --> 00:26:31,003
(rock music)
522
00:26:55,124 --> 00:26:55,957
- Martha!
523
00:26:55,957 --> 00:26:57,970
- Ya killed her, ya son-of-a-bitch,
524
00:26:57,970 --> 00:27:00,520
ya killed her and she didn't
even finish my tattoo!
525
00:27:01,386 --> 00:27:03,805
(rock music)
526
00:27:03,805 --> 00:27:05,022
What's in the letter?
527
00:27:05,022 --> 00:27:09,170
- I don't know I mean, read it here.
528
00:27:09,170 --> 00:27:12,530
- Dear Mr. Wizard, you
have just killed me.
529
00:27:12,530 --> 00:27:14,476
Son-of-a-bitch, ya killed
her, and in doing so,
530
00:27:14,476 --> 00:27:17,680
you'll be held responsible for the death.
531
00:27:17,680 --> 00:27:18,910
Hey, huh!
532
00:27:18,910 --> 00:27:21,140
- Oh (faint speaking).
- Huh, you can't be, huh?
533
00:27:21,140 --> 00:27:23,470
- Oh.
- Follow him and he
534
00:27:23,470 --> 00:27:24,890
shall make you free.
535
00:27:24,890 --> 00:27:27,209
Forever yours, Painless Martha, huh?
536
00:27:27,209 --> 00:27:28,603
You gotta be, huh?
- Oh my God,
537
00:27:30,542 --> 00:27:31,959
what have I done?
538
00:27:32,898 --> 00:27:33,731
The duck!
539
00:27:35,181 --> 00:27:36,014
Oh my God!
540
00:27:37,417 --> 00:27:40,270
Wait a minute, hey you, hey,
541
00:27:40,270 --> 00:27:42,193
hey, wait a minute, wait!
542
00:27:45,599 --> 00:27:46,516
She's dead!
543
00:27:51,484 --> 00:27:52,401
She's dead.
544
00:27:54,347 --> 00:27:56,910
- Who's dead, Eisenbaum?
545
00:27:56,910 --> 00:27:59,949
- Painless Martha, the
one with the Ouija board
546
00:27:59,949 --> 00:28:01,870
and the duck was.
547
00:28:01,870 --> 00:28:03,730
She said she would and she did!
548
00:28:03,730 --> 00:28:06,460
And it said so too and
the duck was the proof.
549
00:28:06,460 --> 00:28:08,520
She's dead and I killed her!
550
00:28:08,520 --> 00:28:11,080
- Oh Willard, for Christ's
sake, get off your knees.
551
00:28:11,080 --> 00:28:12,778
- [Willard] Oh God, forgive me!
552
00:28:12,778 --> 00:28:14,684
- Get up off that floor.
553
00:28:14,684 --> 00:28:17,103
- Please, I didn't mean it!
554
00:28:17,103 --> 00:28:19,434
- Eisenbaum.
- Please!
555
00:28:19,434 --> 00:28:21,719
- Now get out, get out of
this office right now, okay?
556
00:28:21,719 --> 00:28:23,835
- [Willard] Lord, help me!
557
00:28:23,835 --> 00:28:24,668
- Ow!
558
00:28:24,668 --> 00:28:25,876
- Lord, help me!
- Ow!
559
00:28:25,876 --> 00:28:26,953
Ow!
- I didn't mean it.
560
00:28:26,953 --> 00:28:29,301
Ow, ow, ow!
- Lord, help me.
561
00:28:29,301 --> 00:28:30,995
- Ow.
- Please, please,
562
00:28:30,995 --> 00:28:32,355
I didn't mean it!
563
00:28:32,355 --> 00:28:33,959
Please!
(bell dinging)
564
00:28:33,959 --> 00:28:35,304
Please!
565
00:28:35,304 --> 00:28:36,559
(loud thudding)
566
00:28:36,559 --> 00:28:39,081
I didn't mean it, please!
567
00:28:39,081 --> 00:28:39,914
She did it!
568
00:28:39,914 --> 00:28:42,218
I killed her in the
(mumbles) of the Ouija board.
569
00:28:42,218 --> 00:28:43,973
I'm all alone on the street.
570
00:28:43,973 --> 00:28:45,576
I gotta watch out for that big thing
571
00:28:45,576 --> 00:28:46,860
with the bill.
572
00:28:46,860 --> 00:28:48,540
I don't--
- Here, Willard.
573
00:28:48,540 --> 00:28:49,457
Put 'em on.
574
00:28:52,451 --> 00:28:53,673
Come on.
575
00:28:53,673 --> 00:28:58,673
(saxophone music)
(toilet flushing)
576
00:29:00,189 --> 00:29:02,850
(man retching)
577
00:29:02,850 --> 00:29:04,907
Hey, Willy boy!
578
00:29:04,907 --> 00:29:07,210
You are looking like someone now.
579
00:29:07,210 --> 00:29:09,884
I mean, I'm going to set you free!
580
00:29:09,884 --> 00:29:12,467
(man retching)
581
00:29:16,130 --> 00:29:17,480
Hope you're feeling better.
582
00:29:18,388 --> 00:29:23,388
(Willard retching)
(horns honking)
583
00:29:28,248 --> 00:29:29,908
(whistle blowing)
(men shouting)
584
00:29:29,908 --> 00:29:31,049
- Hey, hold it!
585
00:29:31,049 --> 00:29:31,935
Get off me!
586
00:29:31,935 --> 00:29:32,768
Who do you think you're holding?
587
00:29:32,768 --> 00:29:34,413
Hey, what do you think
you are dealing with?
588
00:29:34,413 --> 00:29:36,340
(faint speaking) in Miami.
589
00:29:36,340 --> 00:29:37,830
I know John, I know Yoko!
590
00:29:37,830 --> 00:29:39,176
Hey, you can't.
591
00:29:39,176 --> 00:29:40,543
(Yoko wailing)
Shut up, Yoko.
592
00:29:40,543 --> 00:29:42,322
(faint speaking)
(men shouting)
593
00:29:42,322 --> 00:29:43,739
I know all those men.
594
00:29:43,739 --> 00:29:45,794
Hey, this is a free
country, even for a duck!
595
00:29:45,794 --> 00:29:47,622
Hey, let go, oh, let go of me!
596
00:29:47,622 --> 00:29:48,455
Hey, hey!
597
00:29:49,538 --> 00:29:51,275
(men shouting)
598
00:29:51,275 --> 00:29:56,275
(siren wailing)
(men shouting)
599
00:30:00,764 --> 00:30:03,431
(door slamming)
600
00:30:17,286 --> 00:30:20,076
(harmonica music)
601
00:30:20,076 --> 00:30:22,493
(rock music)
602
00:30:23,711 --> 00:30:25,710
- Hey, baby, you funky duck!
603
00:30:25,710 --> 00:30:26,873
Hey, what're you doing in here, say?
604
00:30:26,873 --> 00:30:28,238
- Hey, hey, baby!
605
00:30:28,238 --> 00:30:29,071
What's happening?
606
00:30:29,071 --> 00:30:30,283
Oh, it's a bum wrap, man.
607
00:30:30,283 --> 00:30:31,283
It's false arrest.
608
00:30:31,283 --> 00:30:32,116
- Oh, hear me.
609
00:30:32,116 --> 00:30:33,632
I know (faint speaking).
610
00:30:33,632 --> 00:30:36,957
Imagine cry, yeah, me
too when they done it.
611
00:30:36,957 --> 00:30:38,455
- Hey baby, what's been happening?
612
00:30:38,455 --> 00:30:40,429
- Hey like, you know where you been?
613
00:30:40,429 --> 00:30:41,861
I know (faint speaking).
- Hey, you know,
614
00:30:41,861 --> 00:30:43,880
I've been around, I've
been yellow and webbing it,
615
00:30:43,880 --> 00:30:45,215
you know?
- Webbing it, aha!
616
00:30:45,215 --> 00:30:49,173
Hey, then lay some web on
me you big honky devil.
617
00:30:49,173 --> 00:30:50,290
I love it!
618
00:30:50,290 --> 00:30:52,125
See, can't you get your (mumbles)
619
00:30:52,125 --> 00:30:54,520
as this sign is Eisenburg?
620
00:30:54,520 --> 00:30:55,630
- [Duck] Hey, you two
know each other, huh?
621
00:30:55,630 --> 00:30:57,924
- Well, let me it this way,
622
00:30:57,924 --> 00:31:00,538
he let me say that I just worked for him
623
00:31:00,538 --> 00:31:02,000
at one particular
624
00:31:02,000 --> 00:31:03,130
moment in my--
- Hey, huh, huh!
625
00:31:03,130 --> 00:31:05,690
Willard, Willard, you didn't tell me
626
00:31:05,690 --> 00:31:06,839
that you were into dope.
627
00:31:06,839 --> 00:31:08,097
- Listen, you don't say that!
628
00:31:08,097 --> 00:31:10,473
Man, they can put you in
the can for that shit.
629
00:31:10,473 --> 00:31:11,710
- Hey man, dig it.
630
00:31:11,710 --> 00:31:13,645
You know where I can get
some really good grass?
631
00:31:13,645 --> 00:31:15,387
- Well, let me see if I conjure up
632
00:31:15,387 --> 00:31:18,486
my middle Afro head and let me see
633
00:31:18,486 --> 00:31:20,355
where I could just smell some
634
00:31:20,355 --> 00:31:21,220
- Hey!
- Out for you.
635
00:31:21,220 --> 00:31:23,031
- Look man, I'm a little
down right now, but--
636
00:31:23,031 --> 00:31:24,899
- Look, I'll be floating around this here
637
00:31:24,899 --> 00:31:29,270
cage of animals and maybe
you'll scrounge up something
638
00:31:29,270 --> 00:31:31,293
and be a little up later.
639
00:31:34,116 --> 00:31:36,365
- Hey Willard, you shouldn't be like that!
640
00:31:36,365 --> 00:31:37,933
I mean, he--
- He took my money.
641
00:31:37,933 --> 00:31:39,078
- Hey, but Willard,
642
00:31:39,078 --> 00:31:42,060
what did you get for it, huh, huh?
643
00:31:42,060 --> 00:31:42,893
- You.
644
00:31:42,893 --> 00:31:44,884
- Hey, that's not a bad deal, huh?
645
00:31:44,884 --> 00:31:45,717
- Huh?
- Huh?
646
00:31:45,717 --> 00:31:46,550
- Huh?
- Huh?
647
00:31:46,550 --> 00:31:47,584
- Huh?
648
00:31:47,584 --> 00:31:48,823
- Mm.
649
00:31:48,823 --> 00:31:51,406
(upbeat music)
650
00:31:57,185 --> 00:31:59,612
(loud scraping)
651
00:31:59,612 --> 00:32:02,112
(piano music)
652
00:32:08,035 --> 00:32:09,692
- Hi there.
653
00:32:09,692 --> 00:32:12,610
- Hi there, who's your friend?
654
00:32:12,610 --> 00:32:13,530
- Oh, I love your dress.
655
00:32:13,530 --> 00:32:14,363
Blue's like, the best.
656
00:32:14,363 --> 00:32:15,760
The first time I've ever seen one filled
657
00:32:15,760 --> 00:32:16,978
with feathers.
- Oh!
658
00:32:16,978 --> 00:32:18,583
For God's sakes.
- For having fun.
659
00:32:18,583 --> 00:32:20,595
- My, look at the magician.
660
00:32:20,595 --> 00:32:22,960
I'd like to turn a few tricks.
661
00:32:22,960 --> 00:32:24,567
- What is going on here?
662
00:32:24,567 --> 00:32:25,876
- Just incredible.
- Just relax,
663
00:32:25,876 --> 00:32:26,709
Willard, just relax.
- Do you believe this
664
00:32:26,709 --> 00:32:28,007
nilly queen over here?
665
00:32:28,007 --> 00:32:29,710
Kissy, kissy!
- Well they out
666
00:32:29,710 --> 00:32:31,141
to tell you there's magic.
667
00:32:31,141 --> 00:32:32,722
(loud popping)
- Would you look
668
00:32:32,722 --> 00:32:33,555
at those feet on that duck.
669
00:32:33,555 --> 00:32:34,925
- Oh!
- Would you let go
670
00:32:34,925 --> 00:32:36,228
of my feathers, please?
- Oh, golly!
671
00:32:36,228 --> 00:32:37,800
- I've never shrimped a duck's feet.
672
00:32:37,800 --> 00:32:38,633
I'd certainly like
673
00:32:38,633 --> 00:32:39,466
to get at ya.
- Will you let
674
00:32:39,466 --> 00:32:40,710
go of my web?
- Love some!
675
00:32:40,710 --> 00:32:41,850
- Those are the only feet.
676
00:32:41,850 --> 00:32:42,683
- For heaven's--
677
00:32:42,683 --> 00:32:43,516
Would yous stop sucking
- Oh, my heavens!
678
00:32:43,516 --> 00:32:45,623
- On my finger, please?
- Listen you nelly queen
679
00:32:45,623 --> 00:32:46,617
over there, I'm not kidding.
680
00:32:46,617 --> 00:32:49,639
You stay away from the duck!
- Oh, look
681
00:32:49,639 --> 00:32:50,472
at that.
- Then you go to the--
682
00:32:50,472 --> 00:32:51,805
(man chattering)
Now go to the Houdini's.
683
00:32:51,805 --> 00:32:53,197
I don't give a shit about him,
684
00:32:53,197 --> 00:32:54,715
but just stay stay away from the duck.
685
00:32:54,715 --> 00:32:55,548
(loud biting)
- Oh!
686
00:32:55,548 --> 00:32:56,599
- Here now.
- You pulled my earring off.
687
00:32:56,599 --> 00:32:58,253
- Now you listen to me
- You leave my feathers--
688
00:32:58,253 --> 00:33:00,310
- You fucking--
- Look, I'm bleeding
689
00:33:00,310 --> 00:33:02,349
all over him.
(all chattering)
690
00:33:02,349 --> 00:33:03,628
- Now the poet.
- Get your fingernails
691
00:33:03,628 --> 00:33:05,882
off of my nipples, stop it!
692
00:33:05,882 --> 00:33:07,952
Ow, I'm not kidding you.
693
00:33:07,952 --> 00:33:08,902
Oh, you bitch!
694
00:33:08,902 --> 00:33:11,002
Oh, God, God, I'm bleeding.
695
00:33:11,002 --> 00:33:13,323
Oh, please, oh, heaven!
696
00:33:14,182 --> 00:33:15,015
Oh!
697
00:33:16,112 --> 00:33:18,695
(jaunty music)
698
00:33:24,190 --> 00:33:25,220
- What's the deal?
699
00:33:25,220 --> 00:33:27,290
Martha said you'd make me free.
700
00:33:27,290 --> 00:33:28,123
- You are free.
701
00:33:28,123 --> 00:33:32,094
You can be any way you want
to if you want to bad enough.
702
00:33:32,094 --> 00:33:34,511
(soft music)
703
00:33:38,612 --> 00:33:42,279
(loud grunting and panting)
704
00:34:05,380 --> 00:34:07,110
- Hey, yeah!
705
00:34:07,110 --> 00:34:10,200
Hey, whoa, hey, man!
706
00:34:10,200 --> 00:34:11,810
Far fucking out, man!
707
00:34:11,810 --> 00:34:12,643
- [Willard] Yeah!
708
00:34:13,703 --> 00:34:16,453
(wind whistling)
709
00:34:29,000 --> 00:34:31,120
(percussive music)
710
00:34:31,120 --> 00:34:32,825
- Hi ya, big fella.
711
00:34:32,825 --> 00:34:36,730
Can we do something to ya?
712
00:34:36,730 --> 00:34:39,204
- Hey, yeah, you can do it all to me.
713
00:34:39,204 --> 00:34:40,037
- Mm!
714
00:34:42,825 --> 00:34:45,492
(loud slurping)
715
00:34:47,885 --> 00:34:50,544
And how about your friend?
716
00:34:50,544 --> 00:34:52,860
- Yeah, well here's why we're here.
717
00:34:52,860 --> 00:34:55,103
I mean, the guy really needs a good lay.
718
00:34:55,103 --> 00:34:57,970
I think it would really
straighten him out, you know?
719
00:34:57,970 --> 00:35:00,840
- Well, well, well.
720
00:35:00,840 --> 00:35:02,210
- [Duck] You know, I don't think
721
00:35:02,210 --> 00:35:03,360
he ever has (laughing)!
722
00:35:05,580 --> 00:35:09,580
- Come along there, Sailor.
- Oh, I'm not in the Navy.
723
00:35:09,580 --> 00:35:11,573
- [Woman] Well, that's all right.
724
00:35:12,520 --> 00:35:14,410
Now listen, you're about
725
00:35:14,410 --> 00:35:18,543
to be screwed, blued, and tattooed.
726
00:35:19,541 --> 00:35:22,124
(upbeat music)
727
00:35:26,890 --> 00:35:29,618
♪ Miss Mary or Louise ♪
728
00:35:29,618 --> 00:35:33,440
♪ Belle, get down on them knees ♪
729
00:35:33,440 --> 00:35:36,464
♪ Or Sydney the Dike ♪
730
00:35:36,464 --> 00:35:37,972
♪ Oh, what would you like ♪
731
00:35:37,972 --> 00:35:41,436
♪ We're here to please ♪
732
00:35:41,436 --> 00:35:44,019
(upbeat music)
733
00:35:45,464 --> 00:35:50,464
♪ June, Cindy, or Janine, all
three might be your scene ♪
734
00:35:53,114 --> 00:35:55,872
♪ It's all up to you ♪
735
00:35:55,872 --> 00:36:00,160
♪ A negro, a Jew for you to screw ♪
736
00:36:00,160 --> 00:36:02,743
(upbeat music)
737
00:36:05,573 --> 00:36:09,493
♪ Jill, Bonnie, Linda, Lou ♪
738
00:36:09,493 --> 00:36:12,826
♪ Love, over as on Lou, or so ♪
739
00:36:12,826 --> 00:36:17,269
♪ If they cannot dare stick out of them ♪
740
00:36:17,269 --> 00:36:20,265
♪ And them all two ♪
741
00:36:20,265 --> 00:36:24,970
♪ Well lesson one, you grab her buns ♪
742
00:36:24,970 --> 00:36:29,970
♪ And oh my God, what lovely ones ♪
743
00:36:30,149 --> 00:36:35,149
♪ Position two, you're
doing it on the floor ♪
744
00:36:37,672 --> 00:36:39,376
♪ And she's begging for more ♪
745
00:36:39,376 --> 00:36:44,376
♪ So position three, she needs your knee ♪
746
00:36:44,847 --> 00:36:49,847
♪ Position four, turn to a door ♪
747
00:36:50,186 --> 00:36:53,645
♪ Position five through 10 ♪
748
00:36:53,645 --> 00:36:56,812
♪ These cats are lean ♪
749
00:36:58,039 --> 00:37:00,456
(rock music)
750
00:37:05,049 --> 00:37:08,569
♪ Lucy strapped her hands and knees ♪
751
00:37:08,569 --> 00:37:12,549
♪ Into apparatus such as these ♪
752
00:37:12,549 --> 00:37:15,315
♪ Whips, corsets and bows ♪
753
00:37:15,315 --> 00:37:18,782
♪ Little boy flows, look at it go ♪
754
00:37:18,782 --> 00:37:23,782
♪ Until you tried a
sequent leather jacks ♪
755
00:37:24,380 --> 00:37:29,380
♪ Massaged, it never scout your locks ♪
756
00:37:29,573 --> 00:37:34,573
♪ You might not ever know
just what you missed ♪
757
00:37:36,875 --> 00:37:38,933
♪ Till you taken a piss ♪
758
00:37:38,933 --> 00:37:43,933
♪ With a sweet Maxine or water queen ♪
759
00:37:44,186 --> 00:37:49,186
♪ Nothing an be too obscene ♪
760
00:37:49,193 --> 00:37:52,773
♪ When all my girls fulfill ♪
761
00:37:52,773 --> 00:37:56,062
♪ Your deepest dreams ♪
762
00:37:56,062 --> 00:37:58,761
(man chattering)
763
00:37:58,761 --> 00:38:01,344
(upbeat music)
764
00:38:04,972 --> 00:38:07,817
♪ Colt, horses or a guide ♪
765
00:38:07,817 --> 00:38:11,722
♪ Give someone dead a try ♪
766
00:38:11,722 --> 00:38:15,808
♪ Or maybe a tree or maybe me ♪
767
00:38:15,808 --> 00:38:20,531
♪ It's Kama Sutra time ♪
768
00:38:20,531 --> 00:38:23,202
♪ There'll come a ♪
769
00:38:23,202 --> 00:38:24,035
- [Woman] Good evening, honey.
770
00:38:24,035 --> 00:38:25,742
I mean, what the fuck do you want?
771
00:38:25,742 --> 00:38:26,880
You can try
772
00:38:26,880 --> 00:38:28,520
our Wednesday night special--
- You know, I probably
773
00:38:28,520 --> 00:38:31,600
shouldn't be telling ya how
to do your own business,
774
00:38:31,600 --> 00:38:33,822
but I don't usually get off like this.
775
00:38:33,822 --> 00:38:37,327
I mean, maybe I shouldn't
confess this kinda,
776
00:38:37,327 --> 00:38:39,674
I don't know though, it's
something that you should know
777
00:38:39,674 --> 00:38:42,525
I think because it's really cool.
778
00:38:42,525 --> 00:38:47,090
You take a regular 16
ounce drinking glass,
779
00:38:47,090 --> 00:38:49,533
a banana, you got a banana,
780
00:38:49,533 --> 00:38:54,533
avocado, 20 Alka-Seltzer tablets.
781
00:38:55,090 --> 00:38:57,400
I usually use Alka-Seltzer,
sometimes Fisurine.
782
00:38:57,400 --> 00:38:58,780
They took Fisurine off the market.
783
00:38:58,780 --> 00:39:01,114
It's real, people, raw liver.
784
00:39:01,114 --> 00:39:04,190
A piece of raw liver
and this ordinary vacuum
785
00:39:04,190 --> 00:39:06,950
attachment right here and
when these things are combined
786
00:39:06,950 --> 00:39:10,240
in the proper way, honestly,
the effect is just--
787
00:39:10,240 --> 00:39:12,490
You got any cream corn?
788
00:39:12,490 --> 00:39:13,323
Cream corn, okay.
789
00:39:13,323 --> 00:39:14,640
Heat the glass, put it--
790
00:39:14,640 --> 00:39:15,600
That's very important.
791
00:39:15,600 --> 00:39:16,776
Now crush the avocado.
792
00:39:16,776 --> 00:39:18,210
Leave the banana whole.
793
00:39:18,210 --> 00:39:19,860
No, no, don't, but freeze it.
794
00:39:19,860 --> 00:39:22,560
Put the banana in the bottom of the glass
795
00:39:22,560 --> 00:39:24,250
and mash the avocado around it.
796
00:39:24,250 --> 00:39:26,137
You got a pound of butter, butter?
797
00:39:26,137 --> 00:39:28,360
Okay, now put it on the fire.
798
00:39:28,360 --> 00:39:30,950
Now put the Alka-Seltzer
on top of the avocado
799
00:39:30,950 --> 00:39:32,195
and pour on the corn.
800
00:39:32,195 --> 00:39:34,027
Insert the liver and now
for the vacuum cleaner
801
00:39:34,027 --> 00:39:36,600
attachment and then put
the attachment in the mouth
802
00:39:36,600 --> 00:39:38,630
of the glass with the bristles up,
803
00:39:38,630 --> 00:39:39,650
make sure they're up!
804
00:39:39,650 --> 00:39:40,800
Was the butter hot?
805
00:39:40,800 --> 00:39:42,185
Oh good, pour it on your foot,
806
00:39:42,185 --> 00:39:44,150
oh God, pour it on your foot.
807
00:39:44,150 --> 00:39:46,130
Keep it coming over the toes.
808
00:39:46,130 --> 00:39:48,027
Oh, it's (mumbles), oh it's incredible.
809
00:39:48,027 --> 00:39:49,480
Oh, an you stand it?
810
00:39:49,480 --> 00:39:50,542
Oh, it's incredible.
811
00:39:50,542 --> 00:39:51,852
It's absolutely--
812
00:39:51,852 --> 00:39:53,155
What a rush!
813
00:39:53,155 --> 00:39:54,072
Oh, oh, oh!
814
00:39:58,181 --> 00:39:59,014
Oh, oh!
815
00:40:00,505 --> 00:40:05,505
(mechanical humming)
(bizarre music)
816
00:40:24,399 --> 00:40:27,066
(bizarre music)
817
00:41:33,640 --> 00:41:38,157
- That's it, that's all
there is, all you got?
818
00:41:43,215 --> 00:41:46,382
(mechanical whirring)
819
00:41:49,825 --> 00:41:52,658
(rocket blasting)
820
00:42:04,965 --> 00:42:08,298
(plane engine whirring)
821
00:42:11,370 --> 00:42:13,787
(soft music)
822
00:42:22,282 --> 00:42:24,163
- Hoo, hoo, hoo!
823
00:42:24,163 --> 00:42:27,340
Aha, the freedom of the open road!
824
00:42:27,340 --> 00:42:28,660
This is great.
825
00:42:28,660 --> 00:42:29,670
We need air, huh?
826
00:42:29,670 --> 00:42:31,084
Or the exercise, huh?
827
00:42:31,084 --> 00:42:31,917
- Oh.
- Huh?
828
00:42:31,917 --> 00:42:33,930
You meet interesting people,
travel to exotic places.
829
00:42:33,930 --> 00:42:35,270
I tell ya, Willard.
830
00:42:35,270 --> 00:42:36,897
This is the life.
831
00:42:36,897 --> 00:42:38,772
- All this living.
832
00:42:38,772 --> 00:42:40,640
You were gonna get me laid.
833
00:42:40,640 --> 00:42:42,840
Here I am in the middle
of the desert with a duck
834
00:42:42,840 --> 00:42:44,170
with no name.
835
00:42:44,170 --> 00:42:48,180
There hasn't been a car by
here in the last three days.
836
00:42:48,180 --> 00:42:50,980
- But at least it's a nice place to visit.
837
00:42:50,980 --> 00:42:53,270
- Yeah, but we're living here.
838
00:42:53,270 --> 00:42:54,420
- You call this living?
839
00:42:58,618 --> 00:43:02,000
- Hey, how'd you get to be a duck anyway?
840
00:43:02,000 --> 00:43:03,930
- Well, I was a turtle for a while,
841
00:43:03,930 --> 00:43:06,404
but things got real slow and frankly,
842
00:43:06,404 --> 00:43:09,987
yeah mother invented
this chance to be a duck,
843
00:43:09,987 --> 00:43:12,070
so I sorta flowed right into it.
844
00:43:12,070 --> 00:43:14,140
- Oh Eddie, you've got to be kidding.
845
00:43:14,140 --> 00:43:15,890
- It's been a good life, believe me!
846
00:43:15,890 --> 00:43:16,800
- [Willard] Yeah, well at least
847
00:43:16,800 --> 00:43:18,561
you've got a position, anyway.
848
00:43:18,561 --> 00:43:20,450
- It's not that easy, a position.
849
00:43:20,450 --> 00:43:22,561
I mean, first people
want you to quack a lot
850
00:43:22,561 --> 00:43:24,006
for a starter.
851
00:43:24,006 --> 00:43:25,976
And then you gotta walk around with yellow
852
00:43:25,976 --> 00:43:28,564
feet all the time, you
know, sorta webbing it,
853
00:43:28,564 --> 00:43:29,513
you know, webbing it.
854
00:43:29,513 --> 00:43:30,510
- Mm-hmm.
- And they're always
855
00:43:30,510 --> 00:43:32,150
making fun of the way I walk.
856
00:43:32,150 --> 00:43:34,408
- Yeah, yeah, but it
gives you something to do.
857
00:43:34,408 --> 00:43:36,313
- You call this doing?
858
00:43:39,030 --> 00:43:43,262
Hey Willard, you know,
work, you know, work!
859
00:43:43,262 --> 00:43:44,095
- What, what?
860
00:43:44,095 --> 00:43:45,100
- Willard, give me your hat.
861
00:43:45,100 --> 00:43:45,933
- My hat?
862
00:43:45,933 --> 00:43:47,392
- Yeah, you're gonna get us a ride!
863
00:43:47,392 --> 00:43:49,010
- Huh?
864
00:43:49,010 --> 00:43:51,219
- Willard, what's the easiest way
865
00:43:51,219 --> 00:43:53,447
for us to get a ride, huh, huh, huh, huh?
866
00:43:54,640 --> 00:43:56,030
- [Willard] Well, the
easiest way to get a ride
867
00:43:56,030 --> 00:43:59,252
would be a chick, be a
chick would be really--
868
00:43:59,252 --> 00:44:00,493
- Right, Willard!
- Everybody except.
869
00:44:00,493 --> 00:44:01,860
- You amaze me.
870
00:44:01,860 --> 00:44:03,620
You're so right on!
871
00:44:03,620 --> 00:44:04,453
Come on.
872
00:44:07,380 --> 00:44:08,592
- This is demeaning.
873
00:44:08,592 --> 00:44:11,710
What about my male ego, my moral ethics,
874
00:44:11,710 --> 00:44:13,690
my women's rights?
- Hold it, Willard!
875
00:44:13,690 --> 00:44:14,523
Here comes a car.
876
00:44:14,523 --> 00:44:16,679
You want to live, don't ya?
877
00:44:16,679 --> 00:44:19,771
Huh, huh?
878
00:44:19,771 --> 00:44:23,327
(car engine humming)
879
00:44:23,327 --> 00:44:25,953
(breaks squealing)
880
00:44:25,953 --> 00:44:26,940
(engine rumbling)
881
00:44:26,940 --> 00:44:29,460
- Hey, hey, hey, brother, hey, right on!
882
00:44:29,460 --> 00:44:30,780
Hey, hey, it's me!
883
00:44:30,780 --> 00:44:32,411
Hey, over here, your white brother.
884
00:44:32,411 --> 00:44:36,047
- Hey you, fuck you, Willard (laughing).
885
00:44:38,467 --> 00:44:40,002
- Oh.
- What happened?
886
00:44:40,002 --> 00:44:41,960
What did you say?
887
00:44:41,960 --> 00:44:43,482
- I don't know!
888
00:44:43,482 --> 00:44:44,939
(tires squealing)
889
00:44:44,939 --> 00:44:46,522
- Pardon us, madam.
890
00:44:47,404 --> 00:44:50,163
All we willing, then!
891
00:44:51,323 --> 00:44:52,700
- [Duck] What was that?
892
00:44:52,700 --> 00:44:56,350
- I don't know, I think that was insanity.
893
00:44:56,350 --> 00:44:57,183
We're crazy.
894
00:44:57,183 --> 00:44:59,644
- Oh, were they women?
895
00:44:59,644 --> 00:45:00,927
- Oh, you're crazy.
896
00:45:00,927 --> 00:45:03,101
(lips smacking)
897
00:45:03,101 --> 00:45:03,934
- Water!
898
00:45:05,007 --> 00:45:07,183
I'm gonna need some water.
899
00:45:07,183 --> 00:45:09,228
I'm dying!
- What's he saying?
900
00:45:09,228 --> 00:45:10,820
(man mumbling)
901
00:45:10,820 --> 00:45:12,010
I think he's thirsty.
902
00:45:12,010 --> 00:45:13,190
Do you think he's thirsty?
903
00:45:13,190 --> 00:45:14,023
- [Duck] Hey out there in the audience,
904
00:45:14,023 --> 00:45:15,330
do you think he's thirsty?
905
00:45:15,330 --> 00:45:16,437
Well, you have 30 seconds
to write your answer
906
00:45:16,437 --> 00:45:17,339
on the back of the ticket stub!
907
00:45:17,339 --> 00:45:19,306
- [Willard] And send the
answer to the end of the row.
908
00:45:19,306 --> 00:45:21,970
You can win!
- A 16 ounce drinking glass.
909
00:45:21,970 --> 00:45:23,410
- A banana.
- An avocado.
910
00:45:23,410 --> 00:45:25,380
- 20 Alka-Seltzer tablets.
- A piece of raw liver!
911
00:45:25,380 --> 00:45:27,231
- And two free tickets to the next showing
912
00:45:27,231 --> 00:45:29,373
of this movie in Dallas, Texas!
913
00:45:30,736 --> 00:45:31,879
You know something?
914
00:45:31,879 --> 00:45:34,395
I think we are going crazy.
915
00:45:34,395 --> 00:45:35,228
- Water!
916
00:45:36,103 --> 00:45:38,770
(loud thudding)
917
00:45:41,111 --> 00:45:43,357
Do you have any water?
918
00:45:44,930 --> 00:45:46,490
- No, ah, gee, we don't.
919
00:45:46,490 --> 00:45:50,404
- Well sir, then get
your comic transvestite
920
00:45:50,404 --> 00:45:53,393
faggot hands off of me, buckaroo!
921
00:45:59,255 --> 00:46:00,088
(loud thudding)
922
00:46:00,088 --> 00:46:01,043
I want water.
923
00:46:01,891 --> 00:46:05,887
They left me out here in the blazing sun
924
00:46:05,887 --> 00:46:08,220
in the desert and I'm dying!
925
00:46:09,191 --> 00:46:12,274
(car engine buzzing)
926
00:46:19,024 --> 00:46:21,691
(door slamming)
927
00:46:35,300 --> 00:46:38,281
- Well, hello there!
928
00:46:38,281 --> 00:46:40,493
Hi, where we going, huh, huh?
929
00:46:42,860 --> 00:46:44,683
- He's out of gas, man.
930
00:46:45,930 --> 00:46:46,763
- Oh.
931
00:46:46,763 --> 00:46:48,449
- You got any water?
- No.
932
00:46:48,449 --> 00:46:49,579
- Shit.
- No.
933
00:46:49,579 --> 00:46:52,720
- Many cars come by here?
- No.
934
00:46:52,720 --> 00:46:54,480
Hey, what are your names,
935
00:46:54,480 --> 00:46:55,313
what are your names?
936
00:46:55,313 --> 00:46:56,146
Huh, huh?
937
00:46:56,146 --> 00:46:56,979
- [Johnny] My name's Johnny.
938
00:46:56,979 --> 00:46:58,290
- [Edgar] Mm, mine's Edgar.
939
00:47:01,750 --> 00:47:03,981
- Oh yeah, right, fine.
940
00:47:03,981 --> 00:47:06,648
(loud slapping)
941
00:47:17,981 --> 00:47:21,731
(soft acoustic guitar music)
942
00:47:30,664 --> 00:47:32,348
- Hey man, what's your name?
943
00:47:32,348 --> 00:47:33,970
- Willard Eisenbaum.
944
00:47:33,970 --> 00:47:35,400
- Wow.
(faint speaking)
945
00:47:35,400 --> 00:47:36,233
- Wrong.
946
00:47:37,218 --> 00:47:39,635
(soft music)
947
00:47:42,553 --> 00:47:45,470
(faint whispering)
948
00:47:46,574 --> 00:47:48,991
(soft music)
949
00:48:03,680 --> 00:48:05,090
- Hi, Wilbur.
950
00:48:05,090 --> 00:48:06,290
- It's Willard.
951
00:48:06,290 --> 00:48:07,353
- Oh, sorry.
952
00:48:07,353 --> 00:48:10,370
Hey, listen man, I'm
just terrible with names.
953
00:48:10,370 --> 00:48:12,140
You know like, especially when I just
954
00:48:12,140 --> 00:48:13,350
get to meet somebody.
955
00:48:13,350 --> 00:48:14,862
I mean like, you gotta have
956
00:48:14,862 --> 00:48:16,500
some kind of rapport
(Duck snoring)
957
00:48:16,500 --> 00:48:18,260
with the person, you know,
958
00:48:18,260 --> 00:48:20,550
like a personal involvement of some sort,
959
00:48:20,550 --> 00:48:22,174
you gotta get into them heavy,
960
00:48:22,174 --> 00:48:24,240
get to know them.
961
00:48:24,240 --> 00:48:25,650
- Johnny?
- Yeah.
962
00:48:25,650 --> 00:48:27,149
- I gotta tell you, it's a guy.
963
00:48:27,149 --> 00:48:29,204
- Fuck you.
- I'm telling ya,
964
00:48:29,204 --> 00:48:30,267
it's a guy!
965
00:48:30,267 --> 00:48:32,353
- Listen you son-of-a-bitch,
get off my back.
966
00:48:32,353 --> 00:48:34,700
- I'm not on your back, but listen!
967
00:48:34,700 --> 00:48:36,960
Your friend, she's in for a surprise.
968
00:48:36,960 --> 00:48:40,108
- No, your friend is in for a surprise.
969
00:48:40,108 --> 00:48:43,520
(Edgar and Willard shouting)
970
00:48:43,520 --> 00:48:45,037
- Oh wow, man!
971
00:48:45,037 --> 00:48:45,973
It's a guy!
972
00:48:46,880 --> 00:48:48,120
The son-of-a-bitch is a guy!
973
00:48:48,120 --> 00:48:50,735
- I tried to tell ya!
- Shut up.
974
00:48:50,735 --> 00:48:53,630
- Oh Johnny, Johnny.
975
00:48:53,630 --> 00:48:54,913
- Oh, honey.
- It was a guy
976
00:48:54,913 --> 00:48:57,855
and he had this tiny little nasty.
977
00:48:57,855 --> 00:48:59,343
- Oh no!
- And he tried
978
00:48:59,343 --> 00:49:00,823
to put it in my--
979
00:49:00,823 --> 00:49:03,087
oh Johnny, it was so awful.
980
00:49:03,087 --> 00:49:05,180
Yuck, it looked so yuck!
981
00:49:05,180 --> 00:49:07,310
- Poor baby.
- I'm sorry,
982
00:49:07,310 --> 00:49:08,488
I didn't mean to.
983
00:49:08,488 --> 00:49:11,226
I just well, I thought that we could.
984
00:49:11,226 --> 00:49:13,800
(Edgar sobbing)
985
00:49:13,800 --> 00:49:15,720
- Don't you ouch me, you piece!
986
00:49:15,720 --> 00:49:17,269
- Oh, you!
987
00:49:17,269 --> 00:49:20,070
(Willard groaning)
988
00:49:20,070 --> 00:49:22,470
- Wait a minute, you can't hit a lady!
989
00:49:22,470 --> 00:49:24,011
- That was no lady, that was a--
990
00:49:24,011 --> 00:49:25,996
(Duck and Edgar shouting)
991
00:49:25,996 --> 00:49:27,155
- Hit him down there!
992
00:49:27,155 --> 00:49:29,738
(all shouting)
993
00:49:36,617 --> 00:49:39,284
(siren wailing)
994
00:49:45,605 --> 00:49:50,244
- Okay, okay, oh friggin'
kay, break it up.
995
00:49:50,244 --> 00:49:51,822
- I love America!
996
00:49:51,822 --> 00:49:53,800
- Right on.
- Right on what,
997
00:49:53,800 --> 00:49:54,650
right on me?
998
00:49:54,650 --> 00:49:58,050
On your, up your nose, mister and you
999
00:49:58,050 --> 00:50:00,260
love America my tushy.
1000
00:50:00,260 --> 00:50:02,357
You kidding, ducks don't love America.
1001
00:50:02,357 --> 00:50:06,070
They fly over it and
make cuck on it, doo-doo,
1002
00:50:06,070 --> 00:50:09,000
they make big green
duck turds that fluffed
1003
00:50:09,000 --> 00:50:10,422
on into the ponds and rivers.
1004
00:50:10,422 --> 00:50:13,070
They plug up policemen's
guns when they're...
1005
00:50:13,070 --> 00:50:13,903
(guns banging)
1006
00:50:13,903 --> 00:50:15,917
trying to kill rioters,
niggeroes, and Zionists
1007
00:50:15,917 --> 00:50:19,230
and you tell me you love America?
1008
00:50:19,230 --> 00:50:21,387
(guns banging)
No duck ever cared for America
1009
00:50:21,387 --> 00:50:24,676
or they wouldn't shit
on it the way they do.
1010
00:50:24,676 --> 00:50:26,150
(guns banging)
Good Lord, the other day
1011
00:50:26,150 --> 00:50:28,702
I was just taking a
drink of java and I found
1012
00:50:28,702 --> 00:50:30,439
a duck turd in my cup.
1013
00:50:30,439 --> 00:50:31,750
(gun bangs)
1014
00:50:31,750 --> 00:50:34,483
You kidding me, ducks loving America.
1015
00:50:35,870 --> 00:50:37,250
Enough of that shit.
1016
00:50:37,250 --> 00:50:39,400
Are these two bothering
you, little ladies, huh?
1017
00:50:39,400 --> 00:50:41,387
- Hey, it's like this, you see?
1018
00:50:41,387 --> 00:50:44,810
- You watch your step
there, you friggin' duck.
1019
00:50:44,810 --> 00:50:45,980
- Yeah, but you see, you don't understand.
1020
00:50:45,980 --> 00:50:47,694
We were just--
- You two, buster.
1021
00:50:47,694 --> 00:50:49,770
I heard about you from this
1022
00:50:49,770 --> 00:50:52,020
old gummery here.
- We're sorry!
1023
00:50:52,020 --> 00:50:55,433
Yes, siree, Bob, that's them!
1024
00:50:55,433 --> 00:50:57,348
That's them!
- Okay.
1025
00:50:57,348 --> 00:50:59,643
- Either one, either!
- Okay, okay!
1026
00:50:59,643 --> 00:51:00,980
- Right there!
- Okay, you old timer.
1027
00:51:00,980 --> 00:51:02,000
Just take it easy.
1028
00:51:02,000 --> 00:51:04,853
You'll pop your Levis right
out in your bad place.
1029
00:51:04,853 --> 00:51:07,160
Now you two, you stay right where you are
1030
00:51:07,160 --> 00:51:09,030
and me and the old gunner here
1031
00:51:09,030 --> 00:51:11,050
are gonna take care of the ladies,
1032
00:51:11,050 --> 00:51:13,570
make sure that their golden pubes
1033
00:51:13,570 --> 00:51:16,225
are placed safely in their proper place,
1034
00:51:16,225 --> 00:51:17,690
but we'll be right back
(gun banging)
1035
00:51:17,690 --> 00:51:19,100
and you'd better be here,
1036
00:51:19,100 --> 00:51:20,880
you hippie (faint speaking).
1037
00:51:20,880 --> 00:51:24,904
You're in big trouble,
B-freakin' big trouble!
1038
00:51:24,904 --> 00:51:26,260
Come on, little ladies.
1039
00:51:26,260 --> 00:51:29,690
Let's get you and your lovely
pointing rising beauties
1040
00:51:29,690 --> 00:51:31,050
to a safe place, huh?
1041
00:51:31,050 --> 00:51:32,877
Ah, ha, ha.
- Ah, that's right.
1042
00:51:32,877 --> 00:51:34,152
We'll sure--
- Ah, shut up
1043
00:51:34,152 --> 00:51:36,586
you old timer and just get in the car.
1044
00:51:36,586 --> 00:51:39,087
(engine roaring)
1045
00:51:39,087 --> 00:51:41,920
(tires squealing)
1046
00:51:46,337 --> 00:51:49,087
(feet pattering)
1047
00:51:51,330 --> 00:51:52,280
- Here comes a car.
1048
00:52:03,772 --> 00:52:06,439
(loud thudding)
1049
00:52:07,327 --> 00:52:11,013
- Hey, you got a permit to be out here?
1050
00:52:11,900 --> 00:52:12,803
- Well, no.
1051
00:52:13,937 --> 00:52:14,770
Of we need a permit?
1052
00:52:14,770 --> 00:52:16,535
- Are you kidding?
1053
00:52:16,535 --> 00:52:19,575
(laughing)
1054
00:52:19,575 --> 00:52:20,706
- No.
1055
00:52:20,706 --> 00:52:21,774
- I'm not kidding.
1056
00:52:21,774 --> 00:52:23,741
You got no permit?
1057
00:52:23,741 --> 00:52:26,677
- Well no, but we ain't doing anything.
1058
00:52:26,677 --> 00:52:29,259
- We, well you said we.
1059
00:52:29,259 --> 00:52:31,910
Who, who are we?
1060
00:52:31,910 --> 00:52:34,072
- Well, well, him, he and I.
1061
00:52:34,072 --> 00:52:36,322
(laughing)
1062
00:52:39,394 --> 00:52:43,360
- You, you, you come out now, huh?
1063
00:52:43,360 --> 00:52:45,260
- Hey man, (speaks Spanish), huh, huh?
1064
00:52:46,390 --> 00:52:47,900
- Hey, hey.
- Huh, huh?
1065
00:52:47,900 --> 00:52:51,380
- Hey, how come you duck
behind the bush, huh?
1066
00:52:51,380 --> 00:52:52,883
You got a permit?
1067
00:52:52,883 --> 00:52:55,980
- Hey, I always does, see?
1068
00:52:55,980 --> 00:52:58,298
And I just can't resist
ducking a good bush.
1069
00:52:58,298 --> 00:53:00,680
(loud clattering)
- Well, a bird in the hand
1070
00:53:00,680 --> 00:53:02,507
is worth two in the bush.
1071
00:53:03,343 --> 00:53:04,540
Oh!
- Oh man,
1072
00:53:04,540 --> 00:53:06,680
hey, let go of my bush.
1073
00:53:06,680 --> 00:53:08,644
- You got a permit?
- No, what do I need
1074
00:53:08,644 --> 00:53:09,560
a permit for?
1075
00:53:09,560 --> 00:53:12,200
- This is public land,
don't you know that?
1076
00:53:12,200 --> 00:53:13,293
Don't you hear those words?
1077
00:53:13,293 --> 00:53:15,514
This is public land and you ruin it.
1078
00:53:15,514 --> 00:53:18,970
You can't be out here without a permit.
1079
00:53:18,970 --> 00:53:21,444
Now come on, both of you,
you're coming with me!
1080
00:53:21,444 --> 00:53:24,632
- Hey, yeah, yeah, yeah, okay!
1081
00:53:24,632 --> 00:53:27,280
Okay, oh freakin' kay, bucking (mumbles).
1082
00:53:27,280 --> 00:53:31,397
Oh fuckin' kay, America, break it up.
1083
00:53:31,397 --> 00:53:32,440
- Hey.
- Break it up,
1084
00:53:32,440 --> 00:53:34,230
buck it it up.
- Hey.
1085
00:53:34,230 --> 00:53:36,720
They ain't got no permit.
1086
00:53:36,720 --> 00:53:38,780
Don't you know that?
- Shut your fucking
1087
00:53:38,780 --> 00:53:42,540
goddamn greaser mouth
before I take these spurs
1088
00:53:42,540 --> 00:53:44,083
and jam 'em up your boomer.
1089
00:53:46,070 --> 00:53:47,927
This here Mexicali rolls bothering
1090
00:53:47,927 --> 00:53:50,338
you little ladies?
- No wait a moment!
1091
00:53:50,338 --> 00:53:51,171
- This here greaser
1092
00:53:51,171 --> 00:53:52,290
(man shouting)
bothering you?
1093
00:53:52,290 --> 00:53:54,103
Shut your taco mouth!
- You can't talk
1094
00:53:54,103 --> 00:53:55,063
to me like that!
- Shut up!
1095
00:53:55,063 --> 00:53:57,010
- Okay.
- This here greaser
1096
00:53:57,010 --> 00:53:58,513
bothering you, little ladies?
1097
00:53:59,400 --> 00:54:01,251
- You got a permit?
1098
00:54:01,251 --> 00:54:03,670
- Shut your cotton-picking mouth.
1099
00:54:03,670 --> 00:54:04,893
You want a permit?
1100
00:54:06,217 --> 00:54:07,662
You see this badge?
1101
00:54:07,662 --> 00:54:09,570
- What?
- This tall pointed badge?
1102
00:54:09,570 --> 00:54:12,000
- What?
- You want a fucking permit?
1103
00:54:12,000 --> 00:54:15,171
This is my permit, mister.
- I don't want
1104
00:54:15,171 --> 00:54:16,921
your stinking badges!
1105
00:54:18,032 --> 00:54:20,102
(gun bangs)
1106
00:54:20,102 --> 00:54:22,352
(groaning)
1107
00:54:25,157 --> 00:54:27,990
Do you have a permit for that gun?
1108
00:54:31,568 --> 00:54:34,094
(shouting)
(loud cracking)
1109
00:54:34,094 --> 00:54:34,927
(loud explosion)
1110
00:54:34,927 --> 00:54:37,640
- Oh, oh, oh my gosh,
1111
00:54:37,640 --> 00:54:40,529
this looks like it for Captain America.
1112
00:54:40,529 --> 00:54:44,450
Send my balls to the museum in Arizona.
1113
00:54:44,450 --> 00:54:45,283
Oh!
1114
00:54:47,580 --> 00:54:51,390
- Hey man, thanks!
- You're welcome, sweetheart.
1115
00:54:51,390 --> 00:54:53,540
- We'll be seein' ya.
- Yeah, yeah,
1116
00:54:53,540 --> 00:54:56,012
in all the old familiar places.
1117
00:54:56,012 --> 00:54:57,360
Yeah, I'll be there
1118
00:54:57,360 --> 00:55:00,340
with Gutman and Thirsby and Jackabee.
1119
00:55:01,430 --> 00:55:04,069
I never seen a duck
out here in the desert.
1120
00:55:04,069 --> 00:55:06,099
(faint speaking)
1121
00:55:06,099 --> 00:55:08,830
Come on, let's go skin
a fuckin' jackrabbit.
1122
00:55:08,830 --> 00:55:10,163
- [Willard] Bonkers.
1123
00:55:10,163 --> 00:55:11,413
Are they crazy?
1124
00:55:12,605 --> 00:55:15,105
(piano music)
1125
00:55:18,070 --> 00:55:20,653
(man shouting)
1126
00:55:35,627 --> 00:55:38,044
(rock music)
1127
00:55:54,198 --> 00:55:55,115
- Oh, shit!
1128
00:55:56,662 --> 00:55:59,569
(tires squealing)
1129
00:55:59,569 --> 00:56:01,327
- [Willard] Come on!
1130
00:56:01,327 --> 00:56:03,410
- Oh, for Christ's sakes!
1131
00:56:04,520 --> 00:56:06,420
Goddamn hippies!
1132
00:56:06,420 --> 00:56:07,460
- Hey man, thanks.
1133
00:56:07,460 --> 00:56:09,006
I thought we'd never get a ride.
1134
00:56:09,006 --> 00:56:10,040
- Get out!
1135
00:56:10,040 --> 00:56:11,250
- My name's Willard Eisenbaum.
1136
00:56:11,250 --> 00:56:14,924
- Hey, ho, ha, ha, hey, hey,
1137
00:56:14,924 --> 00:56:16,675
hey, keep on.
1138
00:56:16,675 --> 00:56:17,508
- Huh?
1139
00:56:17,508 --> 00:56:18,341
- [Duck And Willard] Keep on!
1140
00:56:18,341 --> 00:56:19,767
- Huh?
- Keep on!
1141
00:56:19,767 --> 00:56:20,869
- What?
- Keep on!
1142
00:56:20,869 --> 00:56:23,053
- Yes?
- Trucking.
1143
00:56:23,053 --> 00:56:25,470
(rock music)
1144
00:56:28,483 --> 00:56:29,533
- Get out!
1145
00:56:29,533 --> 00:56:31,110
I'm not moving till you get out
1146
00:56:31,110 --> 00:56:32,955
of this here, my truck!
1147
00:56:32,955 --> 00:56:35,862
(rock music)
1148
00:56:35,862 --> 00:56:38,407
Oh, okay, okay, I'll move.
1149
00:56:38,407 --> 00:56:43,131
(rock music)
(tires squealing)
1150
00:56:43,131 --> 00:56:48,131
(man shouting)
(rock music)
1151
00:56:56,890 --> 00:56:57,880
- Hey, are we there yet?
1152
00:56:57,880 --> 00:56:58,860
- I don't know.
1153
00:56:58,860 --> 00:57:00,130
Now where are we going?
1154
00:57:00,130 --> 00:57:01,320
- I don't know.
- Well, ask him.
1155
00:57:01,320 --> 00:57:02,630
He's driving.
1156
00:57:02,630 --> 00:57:04,230
- Hey mister, where are we going?
1157
00:57:04,230 --> 00:57:06,470
- Jesus Christ!
- Heaven?
1158
00:57:06,470 --> 00:57:09,363
- Oh hell.
- Oh no you don't.
1159
00:57:12,350 --> 00:57:14,230
Hey, you can't do--
1160
00:57:14,230 --> 00:57:15,093
Hey, why you son-of-a--
1161
00:57:15,093 --> 00:57:18,380
You can't treat me and
my friend like this!
1162
00:57:18,380 --> 00:57:21,790
I was at Chicago in '68,
I was at Woodstock in '69
1163
00:57:21,790 --> 00:57:23,210
with the (mumbles).
1164
00:57:23,210 --> 00:57:24,671
I slept around in motels.
1165
00:57:24,671 --> 00:57:28,850
I know who I am, I know who I am!
1166
00:57:28,850 --> 00:57:30,428
I know who I am.
1167
00:57:30,428 --> 00:57:33,345
(insects chirping)
1168
00:57:37,896 --> 00:57:39,520
(footsteps pattering)
- Freedom of the open
1169
00:57:39,520 --> 00:57:43,170
road, my ass.
- Well, it's not free
1170
00:57:43,170 --> 00:57:44,528
but it's cheap.
1171
00:57:44,528 --> 00:57:46,605
(laughing)
1172
00:57:46,605 --> 00:57:47,480
(Duck whistling)
(cat meowing)
1173
00:57:47,480 --> 00:57:48,580
Here, pussy!
1174
00:57:48,580 --> 00:57:49,770
Here, pussy.
1175
00:57:49,770 --> 00:57:51,700
Yeah, good pussy.
1176
00:57:51,700 --> 00:57:52,620
Come, kitty.
1177
00:57:52,620 --> 00:57:53,563
Here, pussy!
1178
00:57:53,563 --> 00:57:54,396
(cat meowing)
1179
00:57:54,396 --> 00:57:56,386
Come on, come on, come on.
1180
00:57:56,386 --> 00:57:57,711
(cat meowing)
Come on, come on.
1181
00:57:57,711 --> 00:58:01,123
(cat yowling)
That's a good pussy.
1182
00:58:02,735 --> 00:58:07,735
Hey man, Willard, you got
a great place here, huh?
1183
00:58:07,850 --> 00:58:09,670
Hey, my boy's got taste, huh?
1184
00:58:09,670 --> 00:58:12,087
Wow, boy, I love that lamp,
that little (mumbles),
1185
00:58:12,087 --> 00:58:14,094
the little thing that spins.
1186
00:58:14,094 --> 00:58:16,440
Oh, far out chair, Willard.
1187
00:58:16,440 --> 00:58:18,610
Willard, you have exquisite--
1188
00:58:18,610 --> 00:58:21,520
Hey, where did you get
this table, huh, huh, huh?
1189
00:58:21,520 --> 00:58:22,800
Wow, look at that.
1190
00:58:22,800 --> 00:58:24,400
I put my feet, I love the--
1191
00:58:24,400 --> 00:58:26,970
And oh, you decorate the place, you, huh?
1192
00:58:26,970 --> 00:58:29,470
You decorate it yourself, huh, huh?
1193
00:58:29,470 --> 00:58:31,170
Well, it's just beautiful, I--
1194
00:58:31,170 --> 00:58:33,703
Willard, you got any beer, huh?
1195
00:58:35,180 --> 00:58:36,023
I'll go look.
1196
00:58:37,480 --> 00:58:39,880
Hey, mad stocked, Willard.
1197
00:58:39,880 --> 00:58:42,679
Hey, hey, hey, hey, huh, huh,
1198
00:58:42,679 --> 00:58:44,723
huh, huh, huh?
1199
00:58:44,723 --> 00:58:46,567
(TV clicking)
Huh?
1200
00:58:46,567 --> 00:58:49,920
- [Announcer] And now,
tonight's movie, Cheap.
1201
00:58:49,920 --> 00:58:51,011
- Willard, I didn't think we would--
1202
00:58:51,011 --> 00:58:54,360
What you need to do is make a good woman.
1203
00:58:54,360 --> 00:58:56,340
- Gone berserk!
- Come on.
1204
00:58:56,340 --> 00:58:57,710
- [Announcer] Wow.
1205
00:58:57,710 --> 00:58:59,320
- Now all ya need is an 18 ounce
1206
00:58:59,320 --> 00:59:02,017
glass, some avocado,
1207
00:59:02,017 --> 00:59:05,430
(upbeat music)
banana, corn, Alka-Seltzer,
1208
00:59:05,430 --> 00:59:07,630
a vacuum cleaner, a pound of margarine
1209
00:59:07,630 --> 00:59:09,854
and a pound of (mumbles) liver.
1210
00:59:09,854 --> 00:59:12,521
(loud crashing)
1211
00:59:14,466 --> 00:59:15,406
(cat yowling)
1212
00:59:15,406 --> 00:59:17,577
- There, that's perfect!
1213
00:59:17,577 --> 00:59:18,410
I love it!
1214
00:59:19,440 --> 00:59:20,874
(shouting)
1215
00:59:20,874 --> 00:59:22,310
- Wait a minute, wait a minute, Willard.
1216
00:59:22,310 --> 00:59:24,876
You're not going to
actually, not with that?
1217
00:59:24,876 --> 00:59:26,376
I mean, it stinks!
1218
00:59:28,104 --> 00:59:31,453
(bizarre music)
1219
00:59:31,453 --> 00:59:34,536
(Willard and Duck coughing)
1220
00:59:34,536 --> 00:59:35,369
Ooh!
1221
00:59:38,189 --> 00:59:39,494
Wait a minute.
1222
00:59:39,494 --> 00:59:41,780
Willard, what're you doing?
1223
00:59:41,780 --> 00:59:43,140
I's all covered with yuck!
1224
00:59:44,003 --> 00:59:48,670
(Willard groaning)
Oh, hold it, Willard!
1225
00:59:50,007 --> 00:59:52,902
You have got no class, huh, huh?
1226
00:59:52,902 --> 00:59:53,902
She is ugly!
1227
00:59:55,302 --> 00:59:57,771
U-G-L-Y!
1228
00:59:57,771 --> 00:59:59,303
I mean, she bites!
1229
00:59:59,303 --> 01:00:00,730
I've seen ugly road,
1230
01:00:00,730 --> 01:00:04,541
but she, ugh!
(Willard groaning)
1231
01:00:04,541 --> 01:00:07,208
(loud whirring)
1232
01:00:08,044 --> 01:00:10,711
(bizarre music)
1233
01:00:13,658 --> 01:00:14,491
Whoa.
1234
01:00:15,598 --> 01:00:17,510
Ah man, you really did it.
1235
01:00:17,510 --> 01:00:19,548
(bell dinging)
1236
01:00:19,548 --> 01:00:21,052
She is incredible.
1237
01:00:21,052 --> 01:00:23,429
Willard, she's--
1238
01:00:23,429 --> 01:00:25,804
Well go ahead, Willard, go on.
1239
01:00:25,804 --> 01:00:28,410
- No, I can't.
1240
01:00:28,410 --> 01:00:29,960
- What?
- She's too good for me.
1241
01:00:29,960 --> 01:00:32,000
- Oh, go ahead, man.
1242
01:00:32,000 --> 01:00:33,175
- No.
- Go on.
1243
01:00:33,175 --> 01:00:35,051
- [Willard] No, she's just a goddess.
1244
01:00:35,051 --> 01:00:36,640
(Willard mumbling)
- Come on, Willard.
1245
01:00:36,640 --> 01:00:37,473
Go ahead!
1246
01:00:37,473 --> 01:00:38,930
- I can't man, I can't.
1247
01:00:38,930 --> 01:00:40,626
I mean, I just can't.
1248
01:00:40,626 --> 01:00:42,877
- Well, do you mind if I--
1249
01:00:42,877 --> 01:00:44,330
- No, no.
- Would you mind
1250
01:00:44,330 --> 01:00:45,650
if I go?
- No go ahead,
1251
01:00:45,650 --> 01:00:46,620
feed it through.
- Do you mind
1252
01:00:46,620 --> 01:00:47,910
if I--
- Feel free, man.
1253
01:00:47,910 --> 01:00:48,743
- Ooh, ooh!
1254
01:00:50,770 --> 01:00:52,420
- You ate it all!
1255
01:00:52,420 --> 01:00:54,803
You just ate my best girl!
1256
01:00:54,803 --> 01:00:56,494
(gun bangs)
1257
01:00:56,494 --> 01:00:58,134
(Willard shouting)
1258
01:00:58,134 --> 01:00:59,248
(acoustic guitar music)
1259
01:00:59,248 --> 01:01:01,123
♪ Oh my love ♪
1260
01:01:01,123 --> 01:01:03,488
♪ My sweet, my ♪
1261
01:01:03,488 --> 01:01:07,855
♪ I really want to feel you ♪
1262
01:01:07,855 --> 01:01:09,470
- Shouldn't have done that, Willard,
1263
01:01:09,470 --> 01:01:10,833
shouldn't have done that.
1264
01:01:11,902 --> 01:01:13,000
- Ah yes, folks.
1265
01:01:13,000 --> 01:01:15,837
So hurry on down here
before it's too late.
1266
01:01:15,837 --> 01:01:18,645
You see, we have got this fine '51 Metro
1267
01:01:18,645 --> 01:01:20,294
shaped just like a mallard.
1268
01:01:20,294 --> 01:01:23,083
License number 502-FWD.
1269
01:01:24,010 --> 01:01:25,049
I'll repeat that for those of you
1270
01:01:25,049 --> 01:01:25,939
that are hard of hearing,
1271
01:01:25,939 --> 01:01:28,834
502, F as in freaking,
1272
01:01:28,834 --> 01:01:30,070
was (faint speaking).
1273
01:01:30,070 --> 01:01:31,162
W as in weird.
1274
01:01:31,162 --> 01:01:32,930
- D as in dick.
- D as in duck.
1275
01:01:32,930 --> 01:01:33,854
- Let me repeat that again
- Every bit.
1276
01:01:33,854 --> 01:01:34,687
Let me repeat that.
- You've got to
1277
01:01:34,687 --> 01:01:35,855
- For those who are--
- D as in duck.
1278
01:01:35,855 --> 01:01:36,688
(faint speaking)
I'm gonna repeat duck.
1279
01:01:36,688 --> 01:01:37,521
Let me--
1280
01:01:37,521 --> 01:01:38,354
Duck, let me--
1281
01:01:38,354 --> 01:01:39,402
Duck, duck, duck,
1282
01:01:39,402 --> 01:01:40,648
(faint speaking)
duck, duck!
1283
01:01:40,648 --> 01:01:42,770
And these are in beautiful condition,
1284
01:01:42,770 --> 01:01:44,752
all these cars, and they're
not gonna last long,
1285
01:01:44,752 --> 01:01:47,060
so you come on in before it's too late.
1286
01:01:47,060 --> 01:01:49,100
Oh, there's Lightening.
1287
01:01:49,100 --> 01:01:51,291
There, he's peeling on
those steel belt radials
1288
01:01:51,291 --> 01:01:52,856
and with his acid condition,
1289
01:01:52,856 --> 01:01:55,512
he just eats right
through them into the axle
1290
01:01:55,512 --> 01:01:58,247
and just makes a whole
differential disappear
1291
01:01:58,247 --> 01:02:00,230
in a maze of cocka.
1292
01:02:00,230 --> 01:02:02,216
Oh, indeed, you're cute, but don't do it.
1293
01:02:02,216 --> 01:02:03,355
(growling)
(gun bangs)
1294
01:02:03,355 --> 01:02:04,188
That thing has a problem.
1295
01:02:04,188 --> 01:02:05,530
(gun banging)
See, either one
1296
01:02:05,530 --> 01:02:06,820
of these fine cars can be yours
1297
01:02:06,820 --> 01:02:08,529
if you will only act now.
1298
01:02:08,529 --> 01:02:09,362
(gun banging)
1299
01:02:09,362 --> 01:02:10,904
Call tonight before it's too late.
1300
01:02:10,904 --> 01:02:12,200
See, if you don't call,
1301
01:02:12,200 --> 01:02:14,106
Lightening's gonna go right here.
1302
01:02:14,106 --> 01:02:16,139
(faint speaking)
And disembowel your children
1303
01:02:16,139 --> 01:02:18,116
in front of your very eyes.
1304
01:02:18,116 --> 01:02:19,766
He'll wipe your wife's snatch
1305
01:02:19,766 --> 01:02:21,103
right out of her groin.
1306
01:02:21,103 --> 01:02:22,839
(barking and growling)
And (mumbles) like a little
1307
01:02:22,839 --> 01:02:24,140
cute puppy dog (mumbles)
1308
01:02:24,140 --> 01:02:26,030
and then after he does that,
- And once more,
1309
01:02:26,030 --> 01:02:27,175
(faint speaking)
for those of you
1310
01:02:27,175 --> 01:02:28,928
who have goiters on their legs
(faint speaking)
1311
01:02:28,928 --> 01:02:30,793
and (mumbles)
- He's run up to your toilet,
1312
01:02:30,793 --> 01:02:33,460
rip that out and all the
cocka from years before
1313
01:02:33,460 --> 01:02:35,848
will pile up out of your septic tank,
1314
01:02:35,848 --> 01:02:37,395
(faint speaking)
fall onto your grandmother
1315
01:02:37,395 --> 01:02:38,700
and your crewel work
1316
01:02:38,700 --> 01:02:40,428
and you'll stop--
- A weird and wonderful
1317
01:02:40,428 --> 01:02:42,777
waves and (mumbles).
- Screw you, Niagara Falls
1318
01:02:42,777 --> 01:02:44,370
(faint speaking)
And Lightening will come down
1319
01:02:44,370 --> 01:02:46,307
and take a cocka all over your daddy
1320
01:02:46,307 --> 01:02:48,754
and he'll be sitting there
just covered with shit
1321
01:02:48,754 --> 01:02:50,264
watching me on the TV set.
1322
01:02:50,264 --> 01:02:52,736
You can avoid all that
shit if you'll call now
1323
01:02:52,736 --> 01:02:55,164
and come on down and
buy one of these cars.
1324
01:02:55,164 --> 01:02:57,555
We have dogs all over
the place that'll kill ya
1325
01:02:57,555 --> 01:02:59,470
if you don't come down now.
1326
01:02:59,470 --> 01:03:01,448
So I'm telling ya for
your own fucking good
1327
01:03:01,448 --> 01:03:02,775
(gun banging)
come on down now,
1328
01:03:02,775 --> 01:03:04,005
you assholes
(gun bangs)
1329
01:03:04,005 --> 01:03:05,839
and go get those motherfuckers.
1330
01:03:05,839 --> 01:03:07,133
(laughing)
1331
01:03:07,133 --> 01:03:08,781
Let's kill em!
(gun banging)
1332
01:03:08,781 --> 01:03:10,440
Kill till you're fucking dead!
1333
01:03:10,440 --> 01:03:12,248
(dog snarling)
(man shouting)
1334
01:03:12,248 --> 01:03:15,447
(organ music)
(dog gulping)
1335
01:03:15,447 --> 01:03:17,870
♪ Hallelujah ♪
1336
01:03:17,870 --> 01:03:20,453
(choral music)
1337
01:03:22,407 --> 01:03:24,042
- Jump, huh, huh?
1338
01:03:24,042 --> 01:03:24,884
Jump!
1339
01:03:24,884 --> 01:03:26,106
Hey!
1340
01:03:26,106 --> 01:03:27,375
Wait a minute, Willard.
1341
01:03:27,375 --> 01:03:28,208
You can't!
1342
01:03:29,381 --> 01:03:30,524
I'm a duck!
1343
01:03:30,524 --> 01:03:32,000
You can't!
1344
01:03:32,000 --> 01:03:33,797
No, oh, stop!
1345
01:03:33,797 --> 01:03:35,935
Oh, hey, hey, ah!
1346
01:03:35,935 --> 01:03:37,461
Ah, stop it!
1347
01:03:37,461 --> 01:03:38,961
Oh, stop, Willard!
1348
01:03:40,496 --> 01:03:41,496
Oh, Willard.
1349
01:03:43,890 --> 01:03:46,473
(choral music)
1350
01:03:58,469 --> 01:04:00,000
It's over.
1351
01:04:00,000 --> 01:04:02,353
Willard, the movie's over.
1352
01:04:04,290 --> 01:04:07,393
- You know, you're really a good duck.
1353
01:04:09,610 --> 01:04:12,197
- Thanks, huh.
- Mm.
1354
01:04:18,048 --> 01:04:20,298
- [Woman] Willard, wake up!
1355
01:04:22,411 --> 01:04:23,511
This is the--
1356
01:04:23,511 --> 01:04:24,590
- Shut up!
1357
01:04:24,590 --> 01:04:26,704
- Mm?
- Shut up!
1358
01:04:26,704 --> 01:04:27,537
- Oh.
1359
01:04:28,454 --> 01:04:29,565
(alarm ringing)
1360
01:04:29,565 --> 01:04:31,113
What was that, what was that?
1361
01:04:31,113 --> 01:04:32,363
Geez, ah, geez!
1362
01:04:34,667 --> 01:04:37,633
You listen to this crap
every morning, Willard?
1363
01:04:37,633 --> 01:04:40,804
Ah, no wonder you're
hard to get along with.
1364
01:04:40,804 --> 01:04:41,839
Where is it?
1365
01:04:41,839 --> 01:04:43,077
(Willard groaning)
1366
01:04:43,077 --> 01:04:44,650
Where is it, where do you keep it?
1367
01:04:44,650 --> 01:04:48,280
- Oh, (mumbles) it's on the dresser.
1368
01:04:48,280 --> 01:04:49,580
- Well, it's not there.
1369
01:04:49,580 --> 01:04:50,413
Come on, man!
1370
01:04:50,413 --> 01:04:51,973
Where's that clock?
1371
01:04:51,973 --> 01:04:52,839
Must be here!
1372
01:04:52,839 --> 01:04:55,500
(alarm ringing)
1373
01:04:55,500 --> 01:04:57,700
- Aha, the clock!
1374
01:04:57,700 --> 01:04:58,840
Last night.
1375
01:04:58,840 --> 01:04:59,790
You ate it.
1376
01:04:59,790 --> 01:05:03,620
- You mean I'm gonna ring
like this every morning, huh?
1377
01:05:03,620 --> 01:05:04,610
Oh.
1378
01:05:04,610 --> 01:05:07,055
- Well, you are what you eat.
1379
01:05:07,055 --> 01:05:09,555
(cat meowing)
1380
01:05:11,645 --> 01:05:15,312
- Oh, I looked everywhere,
I can't find you.
1381
01:05:16,464 --> 01:05:20,435
Where are you (mumbles).
1382
01:05:20,435 --> 01:05:21,945
Good morning, Willard.
1383
01:05:21,945 --> 01:05:23,933
(clock ticking)
What's that noise?
1384
01:05:23,933 --> 01:05:24,912
- Good morning.
1385
01:05:24,912 --> 01:05:27,104
- Off to work this morning, are you?
1386
01:05:27,104 --> 01:05:30,107
- Yes, ma'am.
- Oh, that's a good boy.
1387
01:05:30,107 --> 01:05:32,893
You can't duck your responsibility.
1388
01:05:32,893 --> 01:05:35,830
(cat meowing)
Have you seen Daisy?
1389
01:05:35,830 --> 01:05:37,997
The poor kitty's been gone all night
1390
01:05:37,997 --> 01:05:40,701
and I can't find her anywhere.
1391
01:05:40,701 --> 01:05:44,200
And who is this nice young man?
1392
01:05:44,200 --> 01:05:45,872
- Oh, excuse me, oh, this nice young man
1393
01:05:45,872 --> 01:05:49,970
is a nice young lady.
- Oh, nice to meet you!
1394
01:05:49,970 --> 01:05:52,330
- Hi.
- This is my landlady.
1395
01:05:52,330 --> 01:05:55,562
This is Daisy.
1396
01:05:55,562 --> 01:05:58,111
(cat meowing)
- Daisy?
1397
01:05:58,111 --> 01:05:59,326
Is that you?
(cat meowing)
1398
01:05:59,326 --> 01:06:01,909
Here, kitty, here kitty, kitty!
1399
01:06:04,930 --> 01:06:07,510
- Daisy?
- Yeah, well it has
1400
01:06:07,510 --> 01:06:10,421
a nice ring to it.
(alarm ringing)
1401
01:06:10,421 --> 01:06:12,137
- [Duck] Come on, come on, come on.
1402
01:06:12,137 --> 01:06:14,390
- Hey, hi, beautiful.
- Hey come on,
1403
01:06:14,390 --> 01:06:17,070
come on.
- Hey, those thighs!
1404
01:06:17,070 --> 01:06:18,027
- Yeah, yeah, come on.
- I'm telling you.
1405
01:06:18,027 --> 01:06:20,388
Hey Duck, those thighs!
- Yeah.
1406
01:06:20,388 --> 01:06:22,502
(bell dings)
- Hi, I'm Willard Eisenbaum.
1407
01:06:22,502 --> 01:06:23,600
I love you.
1408
01:06:23,600 --> 01:06:24,433
(lips smacking)
1409
01:06:24,433 --> 01:06:25,266
Hi!
1410
01:06:25,266 --> 01:06:26,099
- Come on!
- Hi honey!
1411
01:06:26,099 --> 01:06:27,220
I'm Willard Eisenbaum.
1412
01:06:27,220 --> 01:06:28,780
I'm in love.
- Come on,
1413
01:06:28,780 --> 01:06:31,240
we're gonna be late for work!
- Hey, work.
1414
01:06:31,240 --> 01:06:33,218
Good morning, hi, hi!
1415
01:06:33,218 --> 01:06:35,348
Hi, how you doing, honey?
1416
01:06:35,348 --> 01:06:37,920
- Come on, we're gonna
be late for work, huh?
1417
01:06:37,920 --> 01:06:38,944
- Hey!
- Huh?
1418
01:06:38,944 --> 01:06:39,777
- Huh?
- Huh?
1419
01:06:39,777 --> 01:06:40,610
Huh?
- Huh?
1420
01:06:40,610 --> 01:06:42,099
(bell ringing)
1421
01:06:42,099 --> 01:06:44,030
There's the bell.
- Round one!
1422
01:06:44,030 --> 01:06:46,225
(belling ringing)
1423
01:06:46,225 --> 01:06:49,142
(Willard groaning)
1424
01:06:52,320 --> 01:06:53,164
Come on, Duck!
1425
01:06:53,164 --> 01:06:55,638
(upbeat music)
1426
01:06:55,638 --> 01:06:57,563
- Ah, hey, hey, watch me.
1427
01:06:57,563 --> 01:07:00,385
(upbeat music)
1428
01:07:00,385 --> 01:07:01,341
- [Willard] Take it!
1429
01:07:01,341 --> 01:07:02,174
My turn.
1430
01:07:02,174 --> 01:07:04,357
(upbeat music)
1431
01:07:04,357 --> 01:07:05,524
- [Duck] Yeah!
1432
01:07:06,699 --> 01:07:10,535
Ha!
1433
01:07:10,535 --> 01:07:11,677
Yeah, here we go!
1434
01:07:11,677 --> 01:07:13,087
(faint speaking)
1435
01:07:13,087 --> 01:07:13,944
Take it!
1436
01:07:13,944 --> 01:07:16,090
- [Willard] Oh, watch my dust!
1437
01:07:16,090 --> 01:07:16,923
Ah!
1438
01:07:18,940 --> 01:07:20,287
(upbeat music)
- Ever seen webs
1439
01:07:20,287 --> 01:07:21,466
move like this?
- Oh, you're beautiful!
1440
01:07:21,466 --> 01:07:22,299
Ah!
1441
01:07:23,620 --> 01:07:24,453
Ah!
1442
01:07:25,504 --> 01:07:28,087
(upbeat music)
1443
01:07:29,180 --> 01:07:31,503
- Ah, ah, ah.
Yeah.
1444
01:07:31,503 --> 01:07:32,991
(upbeat music)
1445
01:07:32,991 --> 01:07:34,329
- [Willard] Ah, ah, ah.
1446
01:07:34,329 --> 01:07:35,499
Ah, ah, ah!
1447
01:07:35,499 --> 01:07:37,346
(upbeat music)
1448
01:07:37,346 --> 01:07:40,096
Oh Daisy, I love the way you move!
1449
01:07:40,096 --> 01:07:41,500
- Yeah!
- Come on!
1450
01:07:41,500 --> 01:07:42,872
(upbeat music)
1451
01:07:42,872 --> 01:07:44,121
Ah!
1452
01:07:44,121 --> 01:07:45,571
Yeah!
1453
01:07:45,571 --> 01:07:46,404
Hey, yeah!
1454
01:07:47,370 --> 01:07:48,828
- Hey, huh!
- Oh!
1455
01:07:48,828 --> 01:07:50,226
(upbeat music)
1456
01:07:50,226 --> 01:07:52,921
- Eisenbaum, wow.
1457
01:07:52,921 --> 01:07:55,380
I didn't know you could dance like that.
1458
01:07:55,380 --> 01:07:57,960
- Would ya like to join me?
1459
01:07:57,960 --> 01:07:59,594
- Hmm, do I see a gun in your pocket
1460
01:07:59,594 --> 01:08:01,776
or are you just glad to see--
1461
01:08:01,776 --> 01:08:04,109
Whoa, oh my God,
1462
01:08:04,109 --> 01:08:07,434
(Willard grunting)
1463
01:08:07,434 --> 01:08:10,976
Oh, God.
(Willard grunting)
1464
01:08:10,976 --> 01:08:12,070
- I quit!
1465
01:08:13,508 --> 01:08:14,774
- Don't quit.
1466
01:08:14,774 --> 01:08:16,899
- Mm, this must be your second date.
1467
01:08:16,899 --> 01:08:18,198
- Oh, don't quit now, Eisenbaum.
1468
01:08:18,198 --> 01:08:19,904
You just got started.
1469
01:08:19,904 --> 01:08:21,160
- I quit!
1470
01:08:21,160 --> 01:08:22,311
(loud thudding)
1471
01:08:22,311 --> 01:08:24,894
(bright music)
1472
01:08:25,840 --> 01:08:26,673
- Hey.
- Huh?
1473
01:08:26,673 --> 01:08:27,553
- What do they call you?
- Duck.
1474
01:08:27,553 --> 01:08:28,684
- Ooh.
1475
01:08:28,684 --> 01:08:31,690
Hey man, good duck.
1476
01:08:31,690 --> 01:08:34,398
- Hey Willard, you're
not a bad duck yourself.
1477
01:08:34,398 --> 01:08:35,477
(bell dinging)
1478
01:08:35,477 --> 01:08:39,426
♪ Good duck ♪
1479
01:08:39,426 --> 01:08:41,028
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
1480
01:08:41,028 --> 01:08:45,278
♪ You're nothing but a good duck ♪
1481
01:08:45,278 --> 01:08:48,092
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
1482
01:08:48,092 --> 01:08:52,457
♪ You're nothing but a good duck ♪
1483
01:08:52,457 --> 01:08:54,756
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
1484
01:08:54,756 --> 01:08:59,634
♪ You're nothing but a good duck ♪
1485
01:08:59,634 --> 01:09:00,467
(bell dings)
1486
01:09:00,467 --> 01:09:01,590
- Hey, wait a minute.
1487
01:09:01,590 --> 01:09:04,930
Who was that mass man?
1488
01:09:04,930 --> 01:09:07,626
- I don't know, but whoever he was,
1489
01:09:07,626 --> 01:09:12,161
he left a silver duck foot and I wanted
1490
01:09:12,161 --> 01:09:14,287
to thank him.
(bell dings)
1491
01:09:14,287 --> 01:09:17,167
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
1492
01:09:17,167 --> 01:09:19,451
♪ You're nothing but a good duck ♪
1493
01:09:19,451 --> 01:09:21,673
♪ Good duck, yeah ♪
1494
01:09:21,673 --> 01:09:23,811
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
1495
01:09:23,811 --> 01:09:28,211
♪ You're nothing but a good duck ♪
1496
01:09:28,211 --> 01:09:30,644
♪ Come on, get up, just yeah ♪
1497
01:09:30,644 --> 01:09:34,520
♪ What is this we paid for ♪
1498
01:09:34,520 --> 01:09:38,244
♪ We paid for ♪
1499
01:09:38,244 --> 01:09:41,388
♪ You duck ♪
1500
01:09:41,388 --> 01:09:44,295
♪ You no one, get up just yet ♪
1501
01:09:44,295 --> 01:09:47,762
♪ What it is we pay for ♪
1502
01:09:47,762 --> 01:09:51,287
♪ We pay for ♪
1503
01:09:51,287 --> 01:09:52,760
♪ You duck ♪
1504
01:09:52,760 --> 01:09:54,941
(bell dinging)
1505
01:09:54,941 --> 01:09:57,358
(epic music)
1506
01:09:58,839 --> 01:09:59,672
(silly music)
1507
01:09:59,672 --> 01:10:03,339
- [Man] Thank you from
coming and goodnight.
102084
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