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1
00:01:37,431 --> 00:01:38,922
mmm.
2
00:01:43,704 --> 00:01:46,640
Well, it's been a long
time since we did that.
3
00:01:50,243 --> 00:01:54,840
I wasn't sure it
would all still work.
4
00:01:54,915 --> 00:01:56,645
But it did.
5
00:01:58,318 --> 00:02:00,219
It's like riding a bike.
6
00:02:05,993 --> 00:02:10,124
That's been left out
in the rain for 20 years.
7
00:02:10,197 --> 00:02:13,463
For a second there, I
thought I killed you.
8
00:02:14,735 --> 00:02:16,636
It's Violet, darling!
9
00:02:16,703 --> 00:02:20,140
Now, Freddie, remember, no
mentioning the inheritance
10
00:02:20,207 --> 00:02:21,641
my mother left me.
11
00:02:21,708 --> 00:02:25,145
It's the first time we've ever
had any savings and I want us
12
00:02:25,212 --> 00:02:28,876
to be able to keep
it for ourselves.
13
00:02:28,949 --> 00:02:31,544
I'm broke, darling.
I've got nothing.
14
00:02:31,618 --> 00:02:34,645
Oh, that's too bad.
15
00:02:34,721 --> 00:02:36,417
So what else is new?
16
00:02:36,490 --> 00:02:38,322
Don't you want to
know what happened?
17
00:02:38,392 --> 00:02:40,725
Not really.
18
00:02:40,794 --> 00:02:42,660
I lost everything
in the divorce.
19
00:02:42,729 --> 00:02:44,254
I don't understand.
20
00:02:44,331 --> 00:02:46,266
How did you lose
everything in the divorce?
21
00:02:46,333 --> 00:02:47,961
You were only
married a few months.
22
00:02:48,035 --> 00:02:51,164
Well, actually, he stole
it all but this way sounds
23
00:02:51,238 --> 00:02:52,900
more sophisticated.
24
00:02:52,973 --> 00:02:55,169
You'll pull through,
dear. You always do.
25
00:02:55,242 --> 00:02:56,719
That's one of the
things we love about you.
26
00:02:56,743 --> 00:02:59,178
Any sane person with
your life would've killed
27
00:02:59,246 --> 00:03:01,238
themselves long ago.
28
00:03:02,683 --> 00:03:03,946
Thank you, Freddie.
29
00:03:04,017 --> 00:03:06,111
But I don't think I will
pull through this time.
30
00:03:06,186 --> 00:03:10,419
I've really found myself
on the brink of financial ruin.
31
00:03:10,490 --> 00:03:15,155
If only we could
help... But we can't.
32
00:03:15,228 --> 00:03:16,662
Of course not,
33
00:03:16,730 --> 00:03:19,598
and I would never
ask you for anything.
34
00:03:27,107 --> 00:03:30,134
I'm still so surprised,
Stuart, that your mother left
35
00:03:30,210 --> 00:03:31,940
you nothing in her will.
36
00:03:32,012 --> 00:03:34,572
Nope. Nota penny. Spent it all.
37
00:03:34,648 --> 00:03:35,946
What on earth on?
38
00:03:36,016 --> 00:03:39,350
The last time she bought a
dress, Hitler was in power.
39
00:03:39,419 --> 00:03:40,944
Who knows?
40
00:03:41,021 --> 00:03:44,253
Cocaine...
41
00:03:44,324 --> 00:03:46,657
Rentboys...
42
00:03:46,727 --> 00:03:48,662
She always had a
bit of a dark side.
43
00:03:48,729 --> 00:03:52,359
Yes, I suppose. Are those
new dressing gowns you're
44
00:03:52,432 --> 00:03:53,764
both wearing?
45
00:03:53,834 --> 00:03:54,961
No.
46
00:03:55,035 --> 00:03:56,970
Really? Are you quite certain?
47
00:03:57,037 --> 00:04:00,337
Fewer questions, more make up.
48
00:04:03,276 --> 00:04:04,710
Hi!
49
00:04:04,778 --> 00:04:07,043
Why are you dressed
like that, dear?
50
00:04:07,114 --> 00:04:10,573
Oh, it's for me new
job. I'm a lollipop man.
51
00:04:12,319 --> 00:04:14,686
Jesus christ!
52
00:04:14,755 --> 00:04:17,554
Between this and my 3
other jobs, I should be able to
53
00:04:17,624 --> 00:04:18,853
make april's rent.
54
00:04:18,925 --> 00:04:20,450
It's May.
55
00:04:20,527 --> 00:04:23,827
Oh, god, is it?
56
00:04:23,897 --> 00:04:27,493
Do you remember how
attractive we used to think he was?
57
00:04:27,567 --> 00:04:31,663
If only you and I could find a way
to make some extra cash, darling.
58
00:04:31,738 --> 00:04:35,106
You know what I've heard
can be quite lucrative?
59
00:04:35,175 --> 00:04:37,007
A sex tape.
60
00:04:37,077 --> 00:04:40,104
Y-y-yeah, I don't—
I don't think...
61
00:04:40,180 --> 00:04:42,479
No, I have my reservations, too,
62
00:04:42,549 --> 00:04:45,644
but it's something
we should consider.
63
00:04:45,719 --> 00:04:47,779
Do you think we could
make much money?
64
00:04:47,854 --> 00:04:51,313
Only if people had
to pay not to see it.
65
00:04:51,391 --> 00:04:55,658
Well, we hate to give you short
shrift, but we've booked massages
66
00:04:55,729 --> 00:04:59,166
today and then lunch
at the Savoy, so good-bye.
67
00:04:59,232 --> 00:05:01,394
I should go anyway.
68
00:05:01,468 --> 00:05:04,734
If I'm late, the kids
sing, Ash, Ash, has a rash,
69
00:05:04,805 --> 00:05:07,775
shove his stupid head in mash
70
00:05:07,841 --> 00:05:10,606
Wonderful!
71
00:05:10,677 --> 00:05:14,011
It's so good to hear
you're doing so well.
72
00:05:14,080 --> 00:05:16,379
Come on. You, too, get up.
73
00:05:16,449 --> 00:05:19,647
Massages and lunch at the Savoy.
74
00:05:19,719 --> 00:05:21,620
That all sounds very expensive.
75
00:05:21,688 --> 00:05:23,486
It's a present. From whom?
76
00:05:23,557 --> 00:05:25,048
Addydaddybaddawob.
77
00:05:25,125 --> 00:05:26,457
Who?
78
00:05:26,526 --> 00:05:28,671
I'm sorry, dear, the phone's
ringing. I have to get it.
79
00:05:28,695 --> 00:05:30,186
I don't hear the...
80
00:05:34,000 --> 00:05:41,635
Oh, it's so nice to try
something on and actually buy it...
81
00:05:41,708 --> 00:05:44,143
Instead of telling the
salesman I've left my wallet
82
00:05:44,211 --> 00:05:48,046
at home and then
crying in the toilet.
83
00:05:48,114 --> 00:05:51,642
Once you have money, you really
notice how revolting everyone
84
00:05:51,718 --> 00:05:54,017
who doesn't have it is.
85
00:05:54,087 --> 00:05:57,148
Let's just make sure we
don't get too out of control
86
00:05:57,224 --> 00:05:58,658
with the spending.
87
00:05:58,725 --> 00:06:00,421
Yes, you're right.
88
00:06:00,493 --> 00:06:03,190
So... Shall we have
some tea and caviar?
89
00:06:03,263 --> 00:06:04,925
Let's.
90
00:06:04,998 --> 00:06:08,594
Oh, I do hope Balthazar
likes his tiffany water bowl.
91
00:06:10,470 --> 00:06:13,702
I'll go. It's probably
the lobsters.
92
00:06:13,773 --> 00:06:15,605
Oh. What do you two want?
93
00:06:15,675 --> 00:06:20,113
Oh, yes, I am fine after
my triple bypass. Thank you
94
00:06:20,180 --> 00:06:21,614
so much for asking.
95
00:06:21,681 --> 00:06:23,081
I thought that was next week.
96
00:06:23,149 --> 00:06:24,447
It was last week.
97
00:06:24,517 --> 00:06:27,112
Apparently I died for
one minute on the table.
98
00:06:27,187 --> 00:06:30,453
Well, you're alive now.
99
00:06:30,523 --> 00:06:32,458
Is this the man you
were telling me about,
100
00:06:32,525 --> 00:06:34,585
the one you said
was a total fuckwit?
101
00:06:38,531 --> 00:06:40,124
Yes.
102
00:06:40,200 --> 00:06:44,137
I've added a little foie
gras to the... Oh, hello.
103
00:06:44,204 --> 00:06:45,797
Hello.
104
00:06:45,872 --> 00:06:48,637
Is that the other fuckwit? Yes.
105
00:06:48,708 --> 00:06:50,643
We weren't expecting company.
106
00:06:50,710 --> 00:06:53,646
I suppose that's because
we didn't invite anybody over.
107
00:06:53,713 --> 00:06:55,147
What's all that?
108
00:06:55,215 --> 00:06:57,207
Oh it's just some tea
and stale biscuits.
109
00:06:57,284 --> 00:06:59,150
Good, I'm starving. So am i.
110
00:06:59,219 --> 00:07:01,586
Two waters and a menu
when you get a chance, please.
111
00:07:03,123 --> 00:07:05,058
Hello, darling.
112
00:07:05,125 --> 00:07:07,788
I was just popping by to see
if I could borrow something.
113
00:07:07,861 --> 00:07:08,988
What?
114
00:07:09,062 --> 00:07:10,587
A sofa and a television.
115
00:07:10,664 --> 00:07:14,226
It seems mine weren't
completely paid for.
116
00:07:14,301 --> 00:07:17,066
Hello, Violet, why
don't you join us for tea?
117
00:07:17,137 --> 00:07:18,730
That sounds lovely.
118
00:07:18,805 --> 00:07:21,604
You know everyone at this place.
119
00:07:21,675 --> 00:07:24,110
I feel there's something
I've been meaning to ask
120
00:07:24,177 --> 00:07:25,406
You, Mason.
121
00:07:25,478 --> 00:07:28,915
You mean how am I
after my triple bypass?
122
00:07:28,982 --> 00:07:31,781
No, that's not it.
123
00:07:31,851 --> 00:07:34,286
What are all those
shopping bags, Stuart?
124
00:07:34,354 --> 00:07:35,845
Is that from Burberry?
125
00:07:41,861 --> 00:07:45,161
No. It said Sainsbury.
126
00:07:45,231 --> 00:07:46,756
Your eyes are going.
127
00:07:48,201 --> 00:07:51,467
Maybe now is a good time for
everyone to start gathering
128
00:07:51,538 --> 00:07:53,530
their things.
129
00:07:53,606 --> 00:07:56,542
What the bloody
hell happened to you?
130
00:07:56,609 --> 00:07:59,443
I got into a bit of a scrape.
131
00:07:59,512 --> 00:08:02,971
Some of those kids
are real wankers.
132
00:08:03,049 --> 00:08:04,415
Are you all right?
133
00:08:04,484 --> 00:08:06,077
Yeah.
134
00:08:06,152 --> 00:08:08,087
I got one of them back big time,
135
00:08:08,154 --> 00:08:10,089
but now I need to
find another job.
136
00:08:10,156 --> 00:08:12,591
Apparently you're not
allowed to hit 7-year-olds even if
137
00:08:12,659 --> 00:08:14,685
they hit you first.
138
00:08:14,761 --> 00:08:17,356
Did you get a menu yet?
139
00:08:17,430 --> 00:08:21,765
Well, I should go upstairs and
eat that half a banana I was saving.
140
00:08:21,835 --> 00:08:23,098
Yes, off you go!
141
00:08:23,169 --> 00:08:26,333
Ash, don't leave. We're
all about to have tea.
142
00:08:26,406 --> 00:08:28,602
Oh!
143
00:08:28,675 --> 00:08:32,077
No, no. Sometimes Stuart
and I would like to be alone.
144
00:08:32,145 --> 00:08:33,943
Did any of you
ever think of that?
145
00:08:34,014 --> 00:08:36,074
No.
146
00:08:36,149 --> 00:08:37,447
Freddie's right.
147
00:08:37,517 --> 00:08:40,112
We're not here just
to serve you people.
148
00:08:40,186 --> 00:08:42,519
That's an awful attitude
to have if you're running
149
00:08:42,589 --> 00:08:44,615
a restaurant.
150
00:08:44,691 --> 00:08:48,594
Is that caviar on
those biscuits, Stuart?
151
00:08:48,661 --> 00:08:50,926
Since when can
you afford caviar?
152
00:08:50,997 --> 00:08:53,626
No, that's not caviar.
153
00:08:53,700 --> 00:08:56,602
I, um... I sneezed.
154
00:08:58,405 --> 00:09:00,533
It's snot.
155
00:09:00,607 --> 00:09:02,439
Well, we don't
want to keep you, Vi.
156
00:09:02,509 --> 00:09:04,569
You probably want to get
back home so you can sit
157
00:09:04,644 --> 00:09:07,375
on the floor and watch the wall.
158
00:09:07,447 --> 00:09:09,087
Are those bottles of
champagne over there?
159
00:09:09,149 --> 00:09:11,109
Why? Do you want to use
one to smash over the head
160
00:09:11,151 --> 00:09:13,814
of a toddler?
161
00:09:13,887 --> 00:09:16,550
There are lots of expensive
things here lately, darling.
162
00:09:17,924 --> 00:09:20,086
I don't understand what
both of you are saying.
163
00:09:20,160 --> 00:09:24,791
We have told you already
we do not have any money.
164
00:09:24,864 --> 00:09:27,925
I've got two dozen
lobsters for Stuart Bixby.
165
00:09:28,001 --> 00:09:29,594
Lobsters?
166
00:09:29,669 --> 00:09:32,002
Shit, this is gonna
costa fortune!
167
00:09:35,175 --> 00:09:37,940
We're going through
this money very quickly.
168
00:09:38,011 --> 00:09:40,606
Balthazar's hair implants
might have been one
169
00:09:40,680 --> 00:09:42,581
expense too many.
170
00:09:44,184 --> 00:09:47,621
The nice thing about Penelope
thinking this was a restaurant
171
00:09:47,687 --> 00:09:50,885
was that she paid
for her own lobster.
172
00:09:50,957 --> 00:09:54,052
And she left me a good tip.
173
00:09:54,127 --> 00:09:57,620
That makes me rather like her.
174
00:09:57,697 --> 00:10:01,532
Freddie, I have a
confession to make.
175
00:10:01,601 --> 00:10:04,230
No, please, don't be angry.
176
00:10:04,304 --> 00:10:07,138
I've put money into
both Violet's and Ash's
177
00:10:07,207 --> 00:10:08,505
bank accounts.
178
00:10:08,575 --> 00:10:09,941
You did what?
179
00:10:10,009 --> 00:10:12,638
Well, I know we said we'd
just spend it on ourselves,
180
00:10:12,712 --> 00:10:15,272
but they're family.
181
00:10:15,348 --> 00:10:17,647
I only gave them half,
though. We still have half left.
182
00:10:17,717 --> 00:10:19,345
No, we don't.
183
00:10:19,419 --> 00:10:21,650
What do you mean?
184
00:10:21,721 --> 00:10:24,714
I did the same thing.
185
00:10:24,791 --> 00:10:27,659
Oh, no!
186
00:10:27,727 --> 00:10:31,289
So how much does
that leave us with?
187
00:10:32,732 --> 00:10:36,430
Minus £200.
188
00:10:37,737 --> 00:10:42,402
So I suppose we're broke again.
189
00:10:46,746 --> 00:10:49,648
You know what
doesn't cost anything?
190
00:10:58,758 --> 00:11:00,659
Twice?
191
00:11:02,695 --> 00:11:04,596
In one week?
192
00:11:07,667 --> 00:11:13,607
Well, we are newlyweds.
193
00:11:25,518 --> 00:11:28,010
Freddie, the post here!
194
00:11:28,087 --> 00:11:31,182
You've got lots
of birthday cards!
195
00:11:31,257 --> 00:11:33,385
God knows why.
196
00:11:33,459 --> 00:11:37,658
Everybody always makes such
a big deal out of my birthday.
197
00:11:37,730 --> 00:11:41,861
You know, sometimes I
wish I wasn't so beloved...
198
00:11:41,935 --> 00:11:43,665
Like you.
199
00:11:43,736 --> 00:11:47,605
I think you're really going
to like my present this year.
200
00:11:47,674 --> 00:11:50,735
Really? And what did
you buy me with my money?
201
00:11:50,810 --> 00:11:53,678
You always love my presents.
202
00:11:53,746 --> 00:11:57,183
I'm always good at birthday
presents justas you are
203
00:11:57,250 --> 00:11:59,651
always good at
being an arsehole.
204
00:12:04,691 --> 00:12:06,091
Yuck.
205
00:12:10,630 --> 00:12:13,122
Yuck.
206
00:12:13,199 --> 00:12:15,361
What's this? Hmm?
207
00:12:15,435 --> 00:12:18,132
Happy birthday, freddie.
208
00:12:18,204 --> 00:12:21,606
"with love from the cast
and crew of 'Downton Abbey.'"
209
00:12:23,376 --> 00:12:28,644
Oh, that was nice of
them to remember you.
210
00:12:28,715 --> 00:12:31,651
Well, of course
they remember me.
211
00:12:31,718 --> 00:12:33,152
I did appear in two episodes.
212
00:12:33,219 --> 00:12:36,519
I was practically
a series regular.
213
00:12:36,589 --> 00:12:39,354
Are we really counting
the second episode?
214
00:12:39,425 --> 00:12:40,893
And why wouldn't we?
215
00:12:40,960 --> 00:12:43,657
Well they only showed
one of your arms.
216
00:12:43,730 --> 00:12:46,222
Yes, but I was carrying oranges,
217
00:12:46,299 --> 00:12:48,666
and in the first
episode it was potatoes.
218
00:12:48,735 --> 00:12:51,671
An observant viewer could
deduce who was attached
219
00:12:51,738 --> 00:12:53,172
to that arm.
220
00:12:53,239 --> 00:12:57,176
"attached" is a pretty strong
word considering it comes out
221
00:12:57,243 --> 00:13:00,213
of its socket
about 6 times a day.
222
00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:03,011
Why do I expect you to
understand what it's like
223
00:13:03,082 --> 00:13:04,675
being on television?
224
00:13:04,751 --> 00:13:09,621
The most exciting thing you
do each day is pick up dog crap.
225
00:13:10,990 --> 00:13:12,618
Watch it, Freddie.
226
00:13:12,692 --> 00:13:16,220
If it wasn't your birthday,
i'd kick you so hard
227
00:13:16,296 --> 00:13:18,595
in the balls right now.
228
00:13:21,000 --> 00:13:22,434
Hello, darling.
229
00:13:22,502 --> 00:13:24,630
I just popped by to wish
Freddie a happy birthday.
230
00:13:24,704 --> 00:13:26,138
oh.
231
00:13:26,205 --> 00:13:27,696
And to tell you my news.
232
00:13:27,774 --> 00:13:29,640
Oooh, what news?
233
00:13:29,709 --> 00:13:31,610
I'm a lesbian!
234
00:13:34,080 --> 00:13:37,244
Well, you can't be any
worse at it than being
235
00:13:37,317 --> 00:13:39,445
a heterosexual.
236
00:13:39,519 --> 00:13:41,545
That was my thinking, too.
237
00:13:41,621 --> 00:13:45,752
And I've already met the most
fantastic woman on the tube.
238
00:13:45,825 --> 00:13:48,556
Do you mind if I bring
Carlotta round tonight
239
00:13:48,628 --> 00:13:50,119
for your party, Freddie?
240
00:13:50,196 --> 00:13:51,323
Well, why not?
241
00:13:51,397 --> 00:13:53,423
We don't have any other
entertainment planned.
242
00:13:55,335 --> 00:13:58,134
You wouldn't happen to know what
it is that lesbians do, would you?
243
00:13:58,204 --> 00:13:59,729
I don't.
244
00:13:59,806 --> 00:14:01,502
Nor do I want to.
245
00:14:01,574 --> 00:14:03,440
hi!
246
00:14:03,509 --> 00:14:04,909
Hello, Ash!
247
00:14:04,977 --> 00:14:06,468
Happy birthday, Freddie!
248
00:14:06,546 --> 00:14:07,980
Thank you, Ash.
249
00:14:08,047 --> 00:14:10,812
Why are you dressed
as a total slut?
250
00:14:10,883 --> 00:14:14,376
It's for me new
job. I'm a lifeguard.
251
00:14:14,454 --> 00:14:16,047
Do I look ok?
252
00:14:16,122 --> 00:14:19,581
I can't tell anymore,
darling, since I'm a lesbian now.
253
00:14:24,163 --> 00:14:25,756
See? Nothing.
254
00:14:27,100 --> 00:14:29,626
When did you become a lesbian?
255
00:14:29,702 --> 00:14:31,637
What time is it?
256
00:14:33,706 --> 00:14:37,143
If you want to borrow
anything, Vi, most of Stuart's
257
00:14:37,210 --> 00:14:40,612
clothes are appropriate
for an aging lesbian.
258
00:14:42,548 --> 00:14:43,948
Hello, Mason.
259
00:14:44,016 --> 00:14:46,645
Hello, darling. I'm a lesbian.
260
00:14:46,719 --> 00:14:48,551
Oh, splendid.
261
00:14:50,056 --> 00:14:52,890
Have any of you seen Penelope?
She seems to have disappeared.
262
00:14:52,959 --> 00:14:55,895
No, we haven't seen her,
but we'll call if we do.
263
00:14:55,962 --> 00:14:57,430
Aren't you going
to invite me in?
264
00:14:57,497 --> 00:15:00,194
Yeah, it's really
full in here already.
265
00:15:10,076 --> 00:15:13,103
Looking pretty good, Ash.
266
00:15:13,179 --> 00:15:14,613
Thanks a lot.
267
00:15:14,680 --> 00:15:16,410
Really appreciate that.
268
00:15:16,482 --> 00:15:18,781
All eyes are on you when
you strut by that pool.
269
00:15:18,851 --> 00:15:20,945
You own that pool.
270
00:15:21,020 --> 00:15:22,215
You're right.
271
00:15:22,288 --> 00:15:24,120
You're damn right I'm right!
272
00:15:24,190 --> 00:15:26,284
You're a stud!
273
00:15:26,359 --> 00:15:27,987
Can I have a cup of tea?
274
00:15:28,060 --> 00:15:30,086
Aaaaaaaah!
275
00:15:32,198 --> 00:15:33,598
Penelope!
276
00:15:37,203 --> 00:15:38,728
What are you doing here?!
277
00:15:38,805 --> 00:15:41,639
I'm not sure exactly.
278
00:15:41,707 --> 00:15:44,609
I was out with Mason
and then I was here.
279
00:15:46,279 --> 00:15:48,180
Can I tell you a secret?
280
00:15:48,247 --> 00:15:50,614
ok.
281
00:15:50,683 --> 00:15:53,653
Sometimes I forget
little things,
282
00:15:53,719 --> 00:15:58,623
but I'd be horrified if
anybody ever noticed.
283
00:15:58,691 --> 00:16:01,593
Yeah, don't worry. I
don't think they have.
284
00:16:01,661 --> 00:16:04,096
Well, that's because I
usually do a pretty good job
285
00:16:04,163 --> 00:16:05,961
of covering it up.
286
00:16:08,434 --> 00:16:12,530
So listen, Penelope, I'd
really appreciate it if
287
00:16:12,605 --> 00:16:14,801
you kept what you
heard just between us.
288
00:16:14,874 --> 00:16:16,172
Of course, sweetheart.
289
00:16:16,242 --> 00:16:17,938
You know I think you're a love.
290
00:16:18,010 --> 00:16:19,273
Thank you.
291
00:16:19,345 --> 00:16:21,610
But that bloke you were
talking to sounded like
292
00:16:21,681 --> 00:16:22,910
a real tosser.
293
00:16:25,485 --> 00:16:27,613
Let's see, what
shall we do next?
294
00:16:27,687 --> 00:16:31,454
How about a toast to Freddie?
295
00:16:31,524 --> 00:16:33,584
Are there any other choices?
296
00:16:36,095 --> 00:16:38,121
I'd like to make a toast.
297
00:16:38,197 --> 00:16:41,292
What the hell is
this going to be?
298
00:16:41,367 --> 00:16:43,131
To our dear Freddie.
299
00:16:43,202 --> 00:16:47,139
A wonderful actor
and even better friend!
300
00:16:47,206 --> 00:16:49,141
Happy birthday!
301
00:16:49,208 --> 00:16:51,609
Oh. That was normal.
302
00:16:53,246 --> 00:16:56,444
Wait till you see my present!
303
00:16:56,516 --> 00:17:00,647
Stuart always gives Freddie
the most incredible gifts.
304
00:17:00,720 --> 00:17:03,588
Do you know how
much I love you, babe?
305
00:17:03,656 --> 00:17:04,919
Ew.
306
00:17:06,659 --> 00:17:09,595
You better take care of
my girl or you'll have to
307
00:17:09,662 --> 00:17:11,324
answer to me.
308
00:17:11,397 --> 00:17:13,832
I am a lifeguard, so...
309
00:17:13,900 --> 00:17:16,631
So?
310
00:17:16,702 --> 00:17:18,637
Who is this little twerp?
311
00:17:18,704 --> 00:17:20,570
Just someone I used to shag.
312
00:17:27,847 --> 00:17:30,646
You know, I'm not sure
how I feel about sharing
313
00:17:30,716 --> 00:17:32,412
you, Violet.
314
00:17:32,485 --> 00:17:34,681
Ooh!
315
00:17:34,754 --> 00:17:36,950
You stay away from her!
316
00:17:37,023 --> 00:17:38,685
Thank you, darling.
317
00:17:38,758 --> 00:17:41,523
He was getting
rather aggressive.
318
00:17:41,594 --> 00:17:45,463
Ash, get up, stop drawing
attention to yourself.
319
00:17:45,531 --> 00:17:48,023
Where's the hot stud now, eh?
320
00:17:48,100 --> 00:17:50,126
Strutting round the
pool all eyes on you.
321
00:17:50,202 --> 00:17:52,637
You should have heard him
going on before, you'd think
322
00:17:52,705 --> 00:17:55,971
the sun shone out of his arse.
323
00:17:56,042 --> 00:17:57,305
It was sickening.
324
00:17:57,376 --> 00:18:01,211
I'll go get your present now.
325
00:18:01,280 --> 00:18:06,048
Ash, would you pass me
that large card over there?
326
00:18:06,118 --> 00:18:07,552
That hurt.
327
00:18:10,656 --> 00:18:13,649
Oh, it's from the cast and
crew of "Downton Abbey"!
328
00:18:13,726 --> 00:18:15,170
I was just about to
tell you not to read it.
329
00:18:15,194 --> 00:18:18,631
Now everybody knows.
I'm completely mortified.
330
00:18:18,698 --> 00:18:21,600
They sent you a card for
being on the show once?
331
00:18:21,667 --> 00:18:23,295
I was on the show twice.
332
00:18:23,369 --> 00:18:25,099
I was practically
a series regular.
333
00:18:25,171 --> 00:18:27,106
Oh, yes, the oranges.
334
00:18:27,173 --> 00:18:29,438
How could I forget?
335
00:18:29,508 --> 00:18:32,603
Didn't your arm get
nominated for a BAFTA?
336
00:18:34,413 --> 00:18:36,939
Don't be such a dick.
337
00:18:37,016 --> 00:18:38,609
Here it is!
338
00:18:38,684 --> 00:18:41,984
Happy birthday, Freddie!
339
00:18:48,561 --> 00:18:50,860
Oh, it's a photo album.
340
00:18:50,930 --> 00:18:53,559
Oh, not any photo album.
341
00:18:53,633 --> 00:18:57,627
Each page is a photo of every
birthday of yours that we've
342
00:18:57,703 --> 00:18:59,035
spent together.
343
00:18:59,105 --> 00:19:00,539
Oh, I see.
344
00:19:00,606 --> 00:19:03,576
So if I flip through this
really fast, I can age 50 years
345
00:19:03,643 --> 00:19:06,078
in 3 seconds.
346
00:19:06,145 --> 00:19:07,613
How charming.
347
00:19:07,680 --> 00:19:10,149
Oh, Stuart, what a
thoughtful present.
348
00:19:10,216 --> 00:19:13,186
We should do
something like that, babe.
349
00:19:13,252 --> 00:19:15,585
Well, we've only known
each other two hours,
350
00:19:15,655 --> 00:19:18,454
but all right, darling.
351
00:19:18,524 --> 00:19:19,856
The last page is blank.
352
00:19:19,925 --> 00:19:21,257
Yeah, well, that's for today.
353
00:19:21,327 --> 00:19:23,660
I want to get a picture of all
of us together to put there.
354
00:19:23,729 --> 00:19:27,496
You swear you'll never leave me.
355
00:19:27,566 --> 00:19:31,367
Scout's honor, darling.
356
00:19:31,437 --> 00:19:34,202
Would you mind terribly
popping out and getting me
357
00:19:34,273 --> 00:19:35,605
some ciggies?
358
00:19:35,675 --> 00:19:37,576
I'm on it, babe. Right.
359
00:19:39,145 --> 00:19:43,913
You stay away from her,
or I'll rip your tiny arms off!
360
00:19:43,983 --> 00:19:45,576
Ok, ok.
361
00:19:50,322 --> 00:19:56,489
Like I'm scared of her.
362
00:19:56,562 --> 00:19:58,428
Is she still there?
363
00:19:58,497 --> 00:20:01,592
Not such a big man without
your mirror, are you?
364
00:20:04,603 --> 00:20:08,597
Well, I think it's finally
over with Carlotta.
365
00:20:08,674 --> 00:20:11,405
I tried but something's missing.
366
00:20:11,477 --> 00:20:12,604
A penis?
367
00:20:18,250 --> 00:20:20,116
I think she has one of those.
368
00:20:21,721 --> 00:20:24,657
At least you gave it a good go.
369
00:20:24,724 --> 00:20:27,819
Come on, let's all
gather round for a photo.
370
00:20:27,893 --> 00:20:31,125
Mason, why don't
you take the picture?
371
00:20:33,132 --> 00:20:35,431
But if I take the picture,
then I won't be in it.
372
00:20:35,501 --> 00:20:37,129
That's ok.
373
00:20:39,638 --> 00:20:42,665
Yep, yep.
374
00:20:44,243 --> 00:20:46,144
You all look like shit.
375
00:20:47,713 --> 00:20:50,273
Well, what do you
think of my present?
376
00:20:50,349 --> 00:20:51,681
It's very nice.
377
00:20:51,751 --> 00:20:53,652
On a scale of 1 to 10?
378
00:20:53,719 --> 00:20:55,347
Oh, I don't know.
379
00:20:55,421 --> 00:20:57,686
If you had to pick.
But I don't have to pick.
380
00:20:57,757 --> 00:20:59,468
Oh, I don't like
where this is heading.
381
00:20:59,492 --> 00:21:01,358
Come on, pick!
382
00:21:01,427 --> 00:21:03,123
3, 4, somewhere in there.
383
00:21:03,195 --> 00:21:04,629
oh!
384
00:21:04,697 --> 00:21:06,495
Ash, watch your drink.
385
00:21:06,565 --> 00:21:09,228
It's very close to my
"Downton Abbey" birthday card.
386
00:21:09,301 --> 00:21:13,671
Maggie Smith picked that
out for me... Probably.
387
00:21:13,739 --> 00:21:17,141
I spent months on that
present. All you can do is
388
00:21:17,209 --> 00:21:19,144
talk about that stupid card!
389
00:21:19,211 --> 00:21:21,840
I don't understand. You
always love my presents.
390
00:21:21,914 --> 00:21:24,645
No, you always
love your presents.
391
00:21:24,717 --> 00:21:28,051
Then why have you
always acted like you did?
392
00:21:28,120 --> 00:21:29,486
Oh, I don't know.
393
00:21:29,555 --> 00:21:32,650
I suppose because I can see
how much it means to you.
394
00:21:32,725 --> 00:21:35,661
I think that could be the
sweetest thing you've ever
395
00:21:35,728 --> 00:21:37,663
said to me.
396
00:21:37,730 --> 00:21:43,226
Ugh! Two men
kissing. It's unnatural.
397
00:21:43,302 --> 00:21:44,668
But, Mason. Hmm?
398
00:21:44,737 --> 00:21:46,137
Aren't you gay?
399
00:21:50,075 --> 00:21:52,408
Yes. What's your point?
400
00:21:52,478 --> 00:21:54,344
Nothing.
401
00:21:54,413 --> 00:21:55,711
Should we have cake now?
402
00:21:55,781 --> 00:21:57,181
Ooh!
403
00:21:57,249 --> 00:21:58,683
I hope someone started lighting
404
00:21:58,751 --> 00:22:00,344
the candles yesterday.
405
00:22:04,557 --> 00:22:07,459
That was nasty.
406
00:22:07,526 --> 00:22:10,621
Sorry. I'm not
having a great day.
407
00:22:12,264 --> 00:22:13,789
Nobody answer that.
408
00:22:16,035 --> 00:22:18,095
I've got your smokes, babe!
409
00:22:19,705 --> 00:22:22,231
Babe?!
410
00:22:22,308 --> 00:22:25,642
How long are we
going to stay like this?
411
00:22:25,711 --> 00:22:28,010
As long as we have to.
412
00:22:32,218 --> 00:22:34,983
Well, that was a
wonderful evening.
413
00:22:35,054 --> 00:22:38,684
Thank you for a
lovely birthday, Stuart.
414
00:22:38,757 --> 00:22:41,158
And Vi? Yes?
415
00:22:41,227 --> 00:22:42,627
Why are you still here?
416
00:22:44,230 --> 00:22:45,994
I'm giving Carlotta
the evening to move her
417
00:22:46,065 --> 00:22:47,294
things out.
418
00:22:47,366 --> 00:22:48,664
She was living with you?!
419
00:22:48,734 --> 00:22:51,294
Lesbians move quickly, darling.
420
00:22:51,370 --> 00:22:53,498
Well, I'm going to turn in.
421
00:22:53,572 --> 00:22:55,040
Night, all.
422
00:22:55,107 --> 00:22:57,667
Goodnight, Balthazar.
423
00:22:57,743 --> 00:23:02,113
Oh, and Stuart, would you take
my card to be framed tomorrow?
424
00:23:02,181 --> 00:23:04,616
I want to hang it where
I can see it every day.
425
00:23:04,683 --> 00:23:06,584
Of course.
426
00:23:08,020 --> 00:23:11,115
Well... I guess it turns
out you don't get Freddie
427
00:23:11,190 --> 00:23:13,182
the perfect gift after all.
428
00:23:13,259 --> 00:23:15,956
Oh, yes, I do.
429
00:23:16,028 --> 00:23:18,088
I sent him that card.
430
00:23:25,204 --> 00:23:28,003
I was thinking of
getting a face-lift.
431
00:23:35,047 --> 00:23:36,413
What do you think, Vi?
432
00:23:36,482 --> 00:23:38,747
That's not my cup of tea.
433
00:23:38,817 --> 00:23:42,219
Well, excuse me for
wanting to improve myself!
434
00:23:42,288 --> 00:23:44,655
If anybody's going to get
a face-lift around here,
435
00:23:44,723 --> 00:23:46,692
it should be you!
436
00:23:46,759 --> 00:23:51,163
I meant that's not
my cup of tea. That is.
437
00:23:51,230 --> 00:23:52,630
oh.
438
00:23:57,536 --> 00:23:59,630
You look great, by the way.
439
00:24:01,206 --> 00:24:04,108
Oh, I'm worried about Balthazar.
440
00:24:04,176 --> 00:24:08,011
He just sneezed
and 3 teeth fell out.
441
00:24:08,080 --> 00:24:09,605
Oh, that's perfectly normal.
442
00:24:09,682 --> 00:24:12,584
I did the same thing yesterday.
443
00:24:12,651 --> 00:24:15,120
Do you know, boys, I
was considering taking
444
00:24:15,187 --> 00:24:17,179
a trip to Italy.
445
00:24:17,256 --> 00:24:18,485
What do you think?
446
00:24:18,557 --> 00:24:20,116
Oh, now's not a
good time, Violet.
447
00:24:20,192 --> 00:24:21,956
We've got so much coming up.
448
00:24:22,027 --> 00:24:23,359
Like what?
449
00:24:23,429 --> 00:24:27,491
Well, I... I can't think of
anything at the moment,
450
00:24:27,566 --> 00:24:29,865
but we might need
you for something.
451
00:24:31,136 --> 00:24:33,128
Well, thanks for asking,
Vi, but we'd prefer you
452
00:24:33,205 --> 00:24:34,730
to stay in town.
453
00:24:34,807 --> 00:24:36,901
We'll check our diary
and get back to you.
454
00:24:36,976 --> 00:24:39,104
Oh, alright.
455
00:24:39,178 --> 00:24:40,305
Hi!
456
00:24:40,379 --> 00:24:41,506
Hello, Ash.
457
00:24:41,580 --> 00:24:42,843
Hello, Ash!
458
00:24:42,915 --> 00:24:44,645
I've got some really big news!
459
00:24:44,717 --> 00:24:47,482
Oh, come in, sit down.
460
00:24:47,553 --> 00:24:49,249
Here, can I get you a drink?
461
00:24:49,321 --> 00:24:52,257
We have water or tea.
462
00:24:52,324 --> 00:24:55,522
Actually only tea,
the tap's just broken.
463
00:24:55,594 --> 00:24:57,153
That's empty.
464
00:24:57,229 --> 00:24:59,664
We have nothing.
465
00:24:59,732 --> 00:25:01,291
I'm good, thanks.
466
00:25:01,367 --> 00:25:03,029
So what's your news, darling?
467
00:25:03,102 --> 00:25:05,662
I'm going to university!
468
00:25:05,738 --> 00:25:08,105
Oh, that is fantastic!
469
00:25:08,173 --> 00:25:10,369
Congratulations, Ash!
470
00:25:10,442 --> 00:25:12,741
I was wondering when you
were going to do something
471
00:25:12,811 --> 00:25:15,110
with your life.
472
00:25:15,180 --> 00:25:16,876
I didn't want you
to end up like...
473
00:25:21,820 --> 00:25:24,585
Please tell me you're
having a stroke.
474
00:25:29,128 --> 00:25:32,098
I could even help you with
your homework, darling.
475
00:25:32,164 --> 00:25:34,133
I've always been
very good at maths.
476
00:25:34,199 --> 00:25:36,225
That's the one with
all the numbers, right?
477
00:25:36,301 --> 00:25:38,532
Actually, I won't be
going to uni nearby.
478
00:25:38,604 --> 00:25:39,799
What do you mean?
479
00:25:39,872 --> 00:25:42,671
Well, you remember how
both my parents are in prison?
480
00:25:42,741 --> 00:25:44,471
Yeah, we remember.
481
00:25:44,543 --> 00:25:47,775
That is something that
tends to stick with you.
482
00:25:47,846 --> 00:25:52,580
Well, I applied for a grant
in the States and I got it!
483
00:25:52,651 --> 00:25:54,643
Apparently I qualify
as a special needs case
484
00:25:54,720 --> 00:25:57,155
because both my parents are
incarcerated for violent crimes.
485
00:25:57,222 --> 00:25:58,417
Isn't that great?
486
00:25:58,490 --> 00:26:01,085
The States? The United States?
487
00:26:01,160 --> 00:26:02,594
That place over there?
488
00:26:02,661 --> 00:26:03,856
Yeah.
489
00:26:03,929 --> 00:26:07,627
But it's filled with Americans.
490
00:26:10,369 --> 00:26:12,395
I dated one once.
491
00:26:12,471 --> 00:26:15,441
They can be quite peculiar.
492
00:26:15,507 --> 00:26:18,067
They actually have sex sober.
493
00:26:22,815 --> 00:26:24,647
I applied ages ago.
494
00:26:24,716 --> 00:26:26,327
I didn't even think I
was going to get it,
495
00:26:26,351 --> 00:26:28,616
but luckily both my parents
are both serving sentences
496
00:26:28,687 --> 00:26:30,747
for manslaughter,
so that helped a lot.
497
00:26:30,823 --> 00:26:33,054
So, where's the
university, darling?
498
00:26:33,125 --> 00:26:35,492
- It's in new york.
- New york?
499
00:26:35,561 --> 00:26:37,029
Well, now, I forget.
500
00:26:37,096 --> 00:26:39,656
Is that supposed to have
the best of the americans
501
00:26:39,731 --> 00:26:41,063
or the worst?
502
00:26:41,133 --> 00:26:43,261
I think both.
503
00:26:43,335 --> 00:26:46,032
And the grant
is for all 4 years!
504
00:26:46,105 --> 00:26:47,471
4 years?!
505
00:26:47,539 --> 00:26:50,099
Oh, I see.
506
00:26:50,175 --> 00:26:53,145
If that's what you want to do...
507
00:26:53,212 --> 00:26:55,704
Yes, it's your decision.
508
00:26:55,781 --> 00:26:58,148
It's nothing to do with us.
509
00:26:58,217 --> 00:26:59,651
I—i mean, I'm
510
00:26:59,718 --> 00:27:01,778
not definitely taking it yet.
511
00:27:01,854 --> 00:27:03,482
Oh, so it's not definite, then?
512
00:27:03,555 --> 00:27:05,615
Well, no, I guess...
513
00:27:05,691 --> 00:27:08,092
You do whatever
you want. It's really
514
00:27:08,160 --> 00:27:10,595
none of our business.
515
00:27:10,662 --> 00:27:14,064
We actually are pretty
busy today, so, uh...
516
00:27:17,169 --> 00:27:20,606
Oh, ok, um...
517
00:27:20,672 --> 00:27:22,664
I should go anyway.
518
00:27:24,343 --> 00:27:26,141
Congratulations again, Ash.
519
00:27:26,211 --> 00:27:27,770
Thanks, Violet.
520
00:27:31,683 --> 00:27:34,812
You don't suppose he's
ever given his parents
521
00:27:34,887 --> 00:27:36,583
our address, do you?
522
00:27:39,024 --> 00:27:41,584
If he has, we're
as good as dead.
523
00:27:44,096 --> 00:27:46,174
Mum, sorry I can't hear you.
There's a lot of screaming
524
00:27:46,198 --> 00:27:47,962
in the background.
525
00:27:48,033 --> 00:27:49,934
Is there a prison riot going on?
526
00:27:51,637 --> 00:27:56,132
Oh, somebody's brought in
some free chicken from KFC?
527
00:27:56,208 --> 00:27:58,643
No, no, no, you go.
528
00:27:58,710 --> 00:28:00,269
Enjoy.
529
00:28:01,647 --> 00:28:03,548
Yeah, I'll talk to
you next month.
530
00:28:05,150 --> 00:28:07,585
Ahem. Violet.
531
00:28:07,653 --> 00:28:09,087
Hello, darling.
532
00:28:09,154 --> 00:28:12,090
Come in, sit. Can
I get you a drink?
533
00:28:12,157 --> 00:28:15,457
Oh, only if you're having
one, otherwise nothing for me.
534
00:28:15,527 --> 00:28:16,927
I'm not.
535
00:28:16,995 --> 00:28:19,555
Oh, I still want one.
I'll have one, too.
536
00:28:21,667 --> 00:28:26,162
Darling, there's something
I want to talk to you about.
537
00:28:27,673 --> 00:28:29,608
This is about
new york, isn't it?
538
00:28:29,675 --> 00:28:31,610
yes.
539
00:28:31,677 --> 00:28:34,237
Why is the bottle all
the way over there?
540
00:28:39,184 --> 00:28:40,675
Don't worry.
541
00:28:40,752 --> 00:28:42,618
I've decided I'm not going.
542
00:28:42,688 --> 00:28:43,951
What do you mean?
543
00:28:44,022 --> 00:28:45,354
Well, I saw how...
544
00:28:45,424 --> 00:28:46,756
Both bottles, no?
545
00:28:50,762 --> 00:28:53,630
I saw how Freddie and Stuart
reacted when they found out
546
00:28:53,699 --> 00:28:56,134
how far away I was going
to be and I realized I couldn't
547
00:28:56,201 --> 00:28:57,692
leave them.
548
00:28:57,769 --> 00:28:59,761
Oh, Ash...
549
00:28:59,838 --> 00:29:02,239
I want to be there
for them, Violet.
550
00:29:02,307 --> 00:29:05,175
Besides, it was stupid
to think that I could make
551
00:29:05,244 --> 00:29:06,872
a life for myself in new york.
552
00:29:06,945 --> 00:29:08,573
No, it wasn't.
553
00:29:08,647 --> 00:29:11,515
But I thought you wanted to
talk to me to get me to stay.
554
00:29:11,583 --> 00:29:12,949
Quite the opposite.
555
00:29:13,018 --> 00:29:14,714
I'm here to make sure you go.
556
00:29:16,788 --> 00:29:18,017
I don't understand.
557
00:29:18,090 --> 00:29:23,051
Listen, darling, don't you
know how special you are?
558
00:29:24,663 --> 00:29:26,063
No.
559
00:29:28,667 --> 00:29:31,535
Nobody's ever said
that I was special before.
560
00:29:31,603 --> 00:29:33,469
Oh, but you are, Ash.
561
00:29:33,538 --> 00:29:37,236
That's why we all
love you so much.
562
00:29:37,309 --> 00:29:40,404
That's why Feddie and
Stuart don't want you to leave.
563
00:29:40,479 --> 00:29:43,108
They want to keep the
things they love the most
564
00:29:43,181 --> 00:29:45,309
closest to them.
565
00:29:45,384 --> 00:29:47,161
That's why I've never
moved further than a few
566
00:29:47,185 --> 00:29:50,622
streets away...
567
00:29:50,689 --> 00:29:53,659
In over 50 years.
568
00:29:53,725 --> 00:29:55,819
And I don't want you
to end up like that.
569
00:29:55,894 --> 00:29:58,830
Maybe I don't want to go.
570
00:29:58,897 --> 00:30:00,627
Maybe I want to stay
here with all of you.
571
00:30:00,699 --> 00:30:01,928
No, you can't stay with us.
572
00:30:02,000 --> 00:30:06,131
You have your whole
life waiting for you.
573
00:30:06,204 --> 00:30:12,701
Ooh, you're gonna be
something so marvelous, Ash.
574
00:30:12,778 --> 00:30:14,610
Promise me you'll go.
575
00:30:16,448 --> 00:30:19,282
You must promise me.
576
00:30:25,223 --> 00:30:26,885
I'm sorry.
577
00:30:26,958 --> 00:30:30,861
Good. Very good.
578
00:30:30,929 --> 00:30:32,921
Now, shall we get blind drunk?
579
00:30:32,998 --> 00:30:34,626
I'd like that.
580
00:30:42,240 --> 00:30:43,572
Let's see...
581
00:30:43,642 --> 00:30:48,342
I've packed him extra socks,
um, a thick jumper because it
582
00:30:48,413 --> 00:30:51,679
gets cold over there,
and I baked him his favorite
583
00:30:51,750 --> 00:30:53,184
biscuits for the plane.
584
00:30:53,251 --> 00:30:54,947
Perfect.
585
00:30:55,020 --> 00:30:59,253
This way he can use them as
weapons if he gets mugged.
586
00:30:59,324 --> 00:31:02,123
Did you hide the extra cash
in there for him, Stuart?
587
00:31:02,194 --> 00:31:03,389
Uh, y-yes, I did.
588
00:31:03,462 --> 00:31:04,725
And the scarf I knitted?
589
00:31:04,796 --> 00:31:07,595
You only gave me a ball of wool.
590
00:31:09,801 --> 00:31:12,635
I kept meaning to
get round to it.
591
00:31:12,704 --> 00:31:14,182
I don't know why you're
both dithering about like
592
00:31:14,206 --> 00:31:15,640
2 monkeys on crack.
593
00:31:15,707 --> 00:31:18,973
Ash is moving. I mean,
it's not that big a deal.
594
00:31:19,044 --> 00:31:20,512
Oh, Freddie...
595
00:31:21,980 --> 00:31:24,313
That's him.
596
00:31:24,383 --> 00:31:26,284
Freddie, you know
it's all right to...
597
00:31:26,351 --> 00:31:28,650
Vi, please.
598
00:31:28,720 --> 00:31:30,655
Hi.
599
00:31:30,722 --> 00:31:32,623
Hello, Ash.
600
00:31:35,093 --> 00:31:37,619
Hi, Freddie. Hello.
601
00:31:39,064 --> 00:31:40,657
All set, darling?
602
00:31:40,732 --> 00:31:42,098
I think so.
603
00:31:42,167 --> 00:31:43,931
Come, sit. Have some tea.
604
00:31:44,002 --> 00:31:45,561
I don't think I've got time.
605
00:31:45,637 --> 00:31:47,162
My flight leaves in a few hours.
606
00:31:47,239 --> 00:31:48,673
Oh.
607
00:31:48,740 --> 00:31:52,177
Well, we've, uh, packed
you a small bag with some
608
00:31:52,244 --> 00:31:54,179
of the things we
thought you might need.
609
00:31:54,246 --> 00:31:55,612
Didn't we, Freddie?
610
00:31:56,915 --> 00:31:58,440
You didn't have to do that.
611
00:31:58,517 --> 00:32:01,385
And I knitted you a scarf.
612
00:32:01,453 --> 00:32:03,115
Ooh, let me take a look at it.
613
00:32:03,188 --> 00:32:05,089
Oh, look at it in new york.
614
00:32:09,194 --> 00:32:10,594
Well...
615
00:32:12,297 --> 00:32:14,095
I guess this is good-bye.
616
00:32:15,700 --> 00:32:17,066
Violet, I don't know what...
617
00:32:17,135 --> 00:32:21,231
Oh, come now. We're gonna
see each other all the time.
618
00:32:21,306 --> 00:32:22,535
Yeah.
619
00:32:22,607 --> 00:32:26,135
I'll go to america.
You'll come visit.
620
00:32:26,211 --> 00:32:27,736
It'll be just like always.
621
00:32:27,813 --> 00:32:29,179
Right.
622
00:32:29,247 --> 00:32:31,546
So, it's not really
good-bye at all, is it?
623
00:32:31,616 --> 00:32:34,245
No, I guess not.
624
00:32:34,319 --> 00:32:35,617
Of course not.
625
00:32:45,530 --> 00:32:46,862
Good-bye.
626
00:32:46,932 --> 00:32:48,901
Have you got your passport?
627
00:32:48,967 --> 00:32:51,664
And your tickets?
628
00:32:51,736 --> 00:32:54,171
And your papers
for the university?
629
00:32:54,239 --> 00:32:55,468
And your... And...
630
00:32:55,540 --> 00:32:58,635
Yes, I've got everything.
631
00:33:02,147 --> 00:33:04,082
Thank you, Stuart.
632
00:33:08,587 --> 00:33:09,885
Freddie?
633
00:33:12,891 --> 00:33:14,450
Best of luck, Ash.
634
00:33:16,995 --> 00:33:18,327
Right.
635
00:33:18,396 --> 00:33:19,830
Thanks.
636
00:33:22,200 --> 00:33:23,463
Ok.
637
00:33:23,535 --> 00:33:25,697
Well, I guess this is it.
638
00:33:25,770 --> 00:33:28,137
I'll see you soon, darling.
639
00:33:28,206 --> 00:33:30,539
It'll be like you never left.
640
00:33:30,609 --> 00:33:32,510
Yeah.
641
00:33:32,577 --> 00:33:34,239
Like I never left.
642
00:33:37,482 --> 00:33:38,609
Bye.
643
00:33:47,225 --> 00:33:48,659
What now?
644
00:33:50,729 --> 00:33:56,361
I don't know about you two,
but I've decided to go to Italy.
645
00:33:56,434 --> 00:33:59,063
Oh?
646
00:33:59,137 --> 00:34:00,935
I'm glad.
647
00:34:01,006 --> 00:34:03,566
Well, now that that's
all over shall we...
648
00:34:35,240 --> 00:34:36,606
Well...
649
00:34:43,848 --> 00:34:47,182
Freddie, tea!
650
00:34:47,252 --> 00:34:51,656
How is it your voice is
getting higher pitched?
651
00:34:51,723 --> 00:34:54,124
Soon only dogs will
be able to hear it.
652
00:34:56,261 --> 00:34:58,662
I see you took your
fucking bitch pills before
653
00:34:58,730 --> 00:35:00,130
going to sleep.
654
00:35:05,670 --> 00:35:07,468
I'm sorry.
655
00:35:07,539 --> 00:35:12,603
This christmas radio drama I'm
recording today with Dame Eileen Atkins
656
00:35:12,677 --> 00:35:15,112
has got my nerves a bit frayed.
657
00:35:15,180 --> 00:35:19,584
And she has done so many
extraordinary things...
658
00:35:21,186 --> 00:35:23,678
None of which I can think
of at the moment, um...
659
00:35:23,755 --> 00:35:25,553
Well, of course you're nervous.
660
00:35:25,624 --> 00:35:28,423
You did get the part
at the very last minute.
661
00:35:28,493 --> 00:35:31,622
I found out from my agent
that was because I wasn't their
662
00:35:31,696 --> 00:35:33,289
first choice.
663
00:35:33,365 --> 00:35:35,596
You were their second choice?
664
00:35:37,302 --> 00:35:39,203
Third?
665
00:35:39,270 --> 00:35:41,637
Uh... 36th.
666
00:35:43,274 --> 00:35:47,370
I didn't even think there were
35 actors of your age still alive.
667
00:35:47,445 --> 00:35:50,609
There aren't. Most of them
turned it down because they're dead.
668
00:35:52,117 --> 00:35:53,642
Hello, darling!
669
00:35:53,718 --> 00:35:56,552
I've been out christmas
shopping all day.
670
00:35:56,621 --> 00:35:59,022
Oh! And who are all
the presents for?
671
00:35:59,090 --> 00:36:01,082
Me.
672
00:36:01,159 --> 00:36:03,560
Hello, Vi. You look...
673
00:36:06,164 --> 00:36:08,133
Hello, Vi.
674
00:36:08,199 --> 00:36:11,601
So, darling, a radio
drama with Eileen Atkins
675
00:36:11,670 --> 00:36:13,161
for christmas.
676
00:36:13,238 --> 00:36:14,638
How thrilling.
677
00:36:14,706 --> 00:36:16,174
What's the role?
678
00:36:16,241 --> 00:36:20,576
An old man who has
never made much of his life.
679
00:36:22,013 --> 00:36:24,676
I didn't have to look
far for inspiration.
680
00:36:27,686 --> 00:36:31,680
He was their 36th choice!
681
00:36:33,692 --> 00:36:36,321
So who's Eileen Atkins playing?
682
00:36:36,394 --> 00:36:38,954
I don't know. I've
just read my part.
683
00:36:40,699 --> 00:36:42,133
Hi.
684
00:36:42,200 --> 00:36:43,828
Hello. Can I help you?
685
00:36:43,902 --> 00:36:46,133
I just wanted to
introduce myself. I'm Oliver.
686
00:36:46,204 --> 00:36:47,638
I'm renting the flat upstairs.
687
00:36:47,706 --> 00:36:50,642
I'm Stuart. This is my
husband Freddie and this is
688
00:36:50,709 --> 00:36:52,143
our friend Violet.
689
00:36:52,210 --> 00:36:54,372
Hello, darling.
690
00:36:54,446 --> 00:36:56,642
Would you...
691
00:36:56,715 --> 00:36:59,150
Oh. Well, it was a
pleasure meeting you.
692
00:36:59,217 --> 00:37:01,550
Thanks for dropping by, Oliver.
693
00:37:04,155 --> 00:37:05,589
Ooh, he seemed nice.
694
00:37:05,657 --> 00:37:07,523
Yes.
695
00:37:10,095 --> 00:37:12,087
I should be off.
696
00:37:12,163 --> 00:37:14,564
Don't want to keep
the Dame waiting.
697
00:37:16,668 --> 00:37:22,073
You know, I'm going to take my
"Downton Abbey" birthday card
698
00:37:22,140 --> 00:37:23,972
to show her.
699
00:37:24,042 --> 00:37:27,877
Let her know that
i'm somebody, too.
700
00:37:35,253 --> 00:37:38,485
Sometimes he breaks my heart.
701
00:37:38,556 --> 00:37:44,120
Freddie, as Albert: My, you certainly
love your rocking chair, Rosemary.
702
00:37:49,334 --> 00:37:50,700
Eileen, as Rosemary:
I do, Albert.
703
00:37:50,769 --> 00:37:53,864
Almost as much as our cat.
704
00:37:55,707 --> 00:37:59,644
Rosemary, a car is pulling up!
705
00:38:04,182 --> 00:38:07,084
I can't tell who
it is, Rosemary.
706
00:38:07,152 --> 00:38:08,586
Wait.
707
00:38:08,653 --> 00:38:10,588
Can it be?
708
00:38:10,655 --> 00:38:12,089
Is it?
709
00:38:13,491 --> 00:38:17,587
I got so emotional I knocked
the vase that was on this
710
00:38:17,662 --> 00:38:19,654
table over.
711
00:38:19,731 --> 00:38:21,962
That's what that sound was.
712
00:38:22,033 --> 00:38:25,060
I'm going to open the
door and see who it is.
713
00:38:26,437 --> 00:38:28,133
Oh, Albert!
714
00:38:28,206 --> 00:38:32,109
It's Lucas, our son, whom
we haven't seen in years.
715
00:38:32,177 --> 00:38:36,615
Albert, sobbing: Lucas!
Give your mother a kiss!
716
00:38:36,681 --> 00:38:38,616
I'm so happy, Albert.
717
00:38:38,683 --> 00:38:44,247
Listen, do you hear
the church bells?
718
00:38:49,227 --> 00:38:55,599
And they're playing "our son
comes home for christmas."
719
00:38:58,169 --> 00:39:02,163
It was all rather convincing,
720
00:39:02,240 --> 00:39:05,733
as if we were there
in the room with you...
721
00:39:05,810 --> 00:39:08,041
Whether we wanted to be or not.
722
00:39:11,149 --> 00:39:13,983
Yes, well done.
723
00:39:14,052 --> 00:39:17,545
Now I'm about to cough.
724
00:39:20,191 --> 00:39:22,558
That was the sound
you just heard.
725
00:39:27,465 --> 00:39:33,097
I must need glasses because
I couldn't see a thing, but it...
726
00:39:33,171 --> 00:39:35,606
It sounded lovely.
727
00:39:35,673 --> 00:39:38,199
I must check on dinner.
728
00:39:38,276 --> 00:39:41,110
Oh, just so you all know,
we had lots of yogurt that
729
00:39:41,179 --> 00:39:46,345
expires tomorrow so that's
going to be featured heavily.
730
00:39:46,417 --> 00:39:49,615
Everything here is terrible.
731
00:39:51,289 --> 00:39:53,121
There you go!
732
00:39:53,191 --> 00:39:57,720
Merry christmas, Balthazar.
733
00:39:57,795 --> 00:39:59,127
Need any help, darling?
734
00:39:59,197 --> 00:40:00,665
Oh, that would be terrific.
735
00:40:00,732 --> 00:40:02,394
Uh, what is it you like to do?
736
00:40:02,467 --> 00:40:05,596
Watch?
737
00:40:05,670 --> 00:40:07,400
Fine.
738
00:40:07,472 --> 00:40:10,670
Oh, that is adorable.
739
00:40:10,742 --> 00:40:12,938
Are you certain
he's still alive?
740
00:40:13,011 --> 00:40:15,640
Not 100%.
741
00:40:17,715 --> 00:40:19,693
I thought I told you never to
leave me alone with my brother
742
00:40:19,717 --> 00:40:21,276
and that loony.
743
00:40:22,520 --> 00:40:25,752
Sorry you're divorced
and have nobody this
744
00:40:25,823 --> 00:40:27,018
christmas, Vi.
745
00:40:27,091 --> 00:40:29,651
Well, I have both of you.
746
00:40:29,727 --> 00:40:31,662
And it's kind of like
the three of us are
747
00:40:31,729 --> 00:40:33,129
married anyway.
748
00:40:33,197 --> 00:40:34,631
No, it's not.
749
00:40:35,600 --> 00:40:37,728
Mason? Yes?
750
00:40:37,802 --> 00:40:40,362
Is it christmas? Yes.
751
00:40:40,438 --> 00:40:42,669
I remember because
my son called me.
752
00:40:42,740 --> 00:40:43,901
How lovely.
753
00:40:43,975 --> 00:40:48,037
Yes, he always calls
me on christmas eve.
754
00:40:48,112 --> 00:40:54,052
My memory hasn't
been... Well, you know.
755
00:40:54,118 --> 00:40:56,178
Can I tell you something?
756
00:40:56,254 --> 00:40:57,552
Certainly you can.
757
00:40:57,622 --> 00:41:00,888
I'm frightened.
758
00:41:00,959 --> 00:41:02,587
I'm here, my dear.
759
00:41:04,128 --> 00:41:05,596
Don't worry.
760
00:41:17,542 --> 00:41:19,101
Thank you.
761
00:41:25,049 --> 00:41:28,144
Well, Stuart has almost
finished murdering dinner.
762
00:41:28,219 --> 00:41:30,552
And what have you
two been talking about?
763
00:41:30,621 --> 00:41:32,199
About what a marvelous
time we've been having.
764
00:41:32,223 --> 00:41:33,657
Yes.
765
00:41:33,725 --> 00:41:34,988
Are you all right, Penelope?
766
00:41:35,059 --> 00:41:38,257
I'm wonderful, Violet. I've
always loved christmas.
767
00:41:38,329 --> 00:41:39,888
So have i.
768
00:41:39,964 --> 00:41:43,662
Mason, do you remember
when our mother used to sing
769
00:41:43,735 --> 00:41:45,101
carols to us?
770
00:41:45,169 --> 00:41:46,660
Of course.
771
00:41:46,738 --> 00:41:49,003
She had a beautiful voice.
772
00:41:49,073 --> 00:41:50,632
Oh, yes.
773
00:41:56,280 --> 00:41:58,272
And then she beat us.
774
00:42:01,185 --> 00:42:02,585
She was a monster.
775
00:42:05,690 --> 00:42:10,628
I really hope
everybody likes yogurt.
776
00:42:12,196 --> 00:42:13,630
Who can that be?
777
00:42:13,698 --> 00:42:15,633
Well, if it's someone
collecting for charity,
778
00:42:15,700 --> 00:42:18,864
politely tell them to piss off.
779
00:42:18,936 --> 00:42:20,996
Hi.
780
00:42:21,072 --> 00:42:22,540
Oh, hello, Oliver.
781
00:42:22,607 --> 00:42:24,685
I just stopped by to wish
you both a merry christmas.
782
00:42:24,709 --> 00:42:26,143
Please, come in.
783
00:42:26,210 --> 00:42:28,236
If you're sure it's
all right. Of course.
784
00:42:28,312 --> 00:42:30,076
Uh, you know Freddie.
785
00:42:30,148 --> 00:42:32,174
And this is Penelope and Mason.
786
00:42:32,250 --> 00:42:33,650
Hello, sweetheart.
787
00:42:33,718 --> 00:42:34,845
Mm, hello.
788
00:42:34,919 --> 00:42:36,649
And you remember
our friend Violet.
789
00:42:36,721 --> 00:42:37,916
Hello, darling.
790
00:42:37,989 --> 00:42:39,423
Hi.
791
00:42:39,490 --> 00:42:41,152
Well, join us.
792
00:42:41,225 --> 00:42:42,625
Yes, sit.
793
00:42:56,340 --> 00:42:58,673
Your hand is on my thigh.
794
00:42:58,743 --> 00:43:00,143
Is it?
795
00:43:01,679 --> 00:43:03,773
Can I get you a drink?
796
00:43:03,848 --> 00:43:06,113
I'm ok, thanks.
797
00:43:06,184 --> 00:43:07,516
Violet!
798
00:43:07,585 --> 00:43:08,985
Oh, sorry.
799
00:43:10,521 --> 00:43:13,150
I don't mean to stare, but...
800
00:43:13,224 --> 00:43:16,592
Are you Freddie Thornhill
from "Doctor Who"?
801
00:43:30,108 --> 00:43:31,474
Guilty as charged, Oliver!
802
00:43:33,778 --> 00:43:36,646
Here I am just spending
a quiet christmas with my
803
00:43:36,714 --> 00:43:40,617
family, and well I guess
I've been discovered.
804
00:43:42,587 --> 00:43:48,652
By the one person who's
ever recognized him.
805
00:43:48,726 --> 00:43:51,161
I am a massive fan.
806
00:43:51,229 --> 00:43:52,697
But you must get
that all the time.
807
00:43:52,763 --> 00:43:55,062
I do.
808
00:43:55,133 --> 00:43:57,659
But how kind of you to say.
809
00:43:57,735 --> 00:44:03,504
So, you must tell us all
about yourself, Oliver.
810
00:44:03,574 --> 00:44:05,566
We want to know everything.
811
00:44:14,685 --> 00:44:16,586
Merry christmas, Freddie.
812
00:44:19,123 --> 00:44:20,591
Merry christmas.
813
00:44:26,130 --> 00:44:27,598
Merry christmas, Balthazar.
814
00:44:59,263 --> 00:45:02,961
Stuart, stop snoring!
815
00:45:03,034 --> 00:45:05,560
That's not me.
816
00:45:07,672 --> 00:45:09,573
Sorry, darlings!
817
00:45:16,480 --> 00:45:19,917
Geez, I'd forgotten
she was here.
818
00:45:19,984 --> 00:45:25,355
See, it is a little like
we're all married.
819
00:45:25,423 --> 00:45:29,087
You have to stop saying that.
820
00:45:34,632 --> 00:45:36,726
Stuart?
821
00:45:36,801 --> 00:45:38,633
Yes?
822
00:45:38,703 --> 00:45:40,604
Will you hold me?
823
00:45:56,442 --> 00:45:59,037
I'm so happy.
824
00:46:09,000 --> 00:46:34,320
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