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1
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Ho, ho, ho!
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00:00:06,565 --> 00:00:08,716
_
3
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_
4
00:00:19,839 --> 00:00:21,995
Good sir, perchance
you would like to try on
5
00:00:21,998 --> 00:00:24,331
the "categorize cap" to see which school
6
00:00:24,424 --> 00:00:26,000
of magic most suits thee?
7
00:00:26,018 --> 00:00:27,777
Not today, weirdo.
8
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Congratulations, you're a Grizzledum!
9
00:00:32,617 --> 00:00:35,785
Yes! Finally! A hat that respects me!
10
00:00:36,012 --> 00:00:37,678
Don't be too cocky.
11
00:00:37,680 --> 00:00:40,531
That means you're a sworn
enemy of Pufflesnuff.
12
00:00:40,625 --> 00:00:42,716
I hate those guys.
13
00:00:42,776 --> 00:00:44,943
Well, well, well, if it ain't
14
00:00:44,962 --> 00:00:47,204
one of those Grizzledum gits.
15
00:00:47,298 --> 00:00:51,191
Someone had a little too much
bubble and squeak for breakfast.
16
00:00:51,210 --> 00:00:54,028
Don't worry, Dad.
Those are just park employees.
17
00:00:54,121 --> 00:00:56,288
Cool! Then they can't hit me back.
18
00:00:56,307 --> 00:00:57,381
Oi!
19
00:00:57,533 --> 00:00:59,624
We're seasonal workers.
20
00:00:59,644 --> 00:01:02,478
We can do as we bloody well please.
21
00:01:02,629 --> 00:01:05,773
Yeah, well, just wait'll my
fellow Grizzledums help me.
22
00:01:06,651 --> 00:01:08,967
I'm known for my stomach aches.
23
00:01:09,061 --> 00:01:12,229
My character was cut from the movies.
24
00:01:12,381 --> 00:01:14,139
- Aah!
- Get him!
25
00:01:14,811 --> 00:01:16,066
This is a good time to call Grampa
26
00:01:16,218 --> 00:01:18,160
and see how Maggie's doing.
27
00:01:18,312 --> 00:01:19,829
Carve a lightning bolt in his head!
28
00:01:19,980 --> 00:01:22,164
Hello, Mabel. Can I have my dad?
29
00:01:22,316 --> 00:01:23,390
Sure thing, Marge.
30
00:01:23,409 --> 00:01:26,393
Patching you through to Throwback 7244.
31
00:01:27,730 --> 00:01:30,488
Hey, Marge, everything is A-okay,
32
00:01:30,508 --> 00:01:31,990
which was a popular slogan
33
00:01:32,084 --> 00:01:35,327
during Martin Van Buren's
election campaign because...
34
00:01:35,346 --> 00:01:38,681
Ooh, thank God
I'm on my anti-rambling meds.
35
00:01:38,832 --> 00:01:41,166
I remember the first day I went on them.
36
00:01:41,585 --> 00:01:43,519
That's it. Anyway, Maggie's having fun
37
00:01:43,746 --> 00:01:45,187
with her little friend.
38
00:01:45,339 --> 00:01:46,430
We're at the beach?!
39
00:01:46,524 --> 00:01:48,248
I better put on sunscreen.
40
00:01:53,014 --> 00:01:55,550
_
41
00:02:01,429 --> 00:02:02,705
I finally know what it's like
42
00:02:02,856 --> 00:02:04,264
to be a British beverage.
43
00:02:04,283 --> 00:02:07,877
Gently back and forth, back and forth.
44
00:02:08,028 --> 00:02:11,121
Whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh!
45
00:02:11,273 --> 00:02:13,624
Bart! Stop playing with the wheel.
46
00:02:13,792 --> 00:02:16,126
Only if Homer buys us
something at the gift shop!
47
00:02:16,278 --> 00:02:20,474
Why do I keep thinking
these places will be fun?
48
00:02:20,509 --> 00:02:22,799
You don't!
It's a place you can be with us
49
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without having to talk to us.
50
00:02:24,896 --> 00:02:26,103
_
51
00:02:28,974 --> 00:02:32,384
Oh, finally, a place to spend money.
52
00:02:32,957 --> 00:02:34,871
I'll take three of each wand
53
00:02:34,906 --> 00:02:37,630
plus holsters and the
five-year magic care warranty.
54
00:02:37,665 --> 00:02:40,242
And I'll pick the one
that costs a little extra
55
00:02:40,469 --> 00:02:43,078
because they also give
a wand to a needy child.
56
00:02:49,161 --> 00:02:50,170
Aw.
57
00:02:50,254 --> 00:02:52,963
Listen to her, purring like a kitten.
58
00:02:55,353 --> 00:02:57,501
Grampa, when was
the last time you saw Maggie?
59
00:02:57,653 --> 00:02:59,486
I just changed her diaper
60
00:02:59,579 --> 00:03:01,321
before I put the cat out.
61
00:03:01,415 --> 00:03:02,848
Uh-oh.
62
00:03:03,917 --> 00:03:06,084
- Maggie!
- Where are you, Mags?
63
00:03:06,178 --> 00:03:08,328
Ask Grampa, maybe he knows.
64
00:03:10,510 --> 00:03:11,206
Simpsons, I don't know
65
00:03:11,258 --> 00:03:14,360
if Heaven's missing an angel,
but I think you might be.
66
00:03:17,615 --> 00:03:19,597
Oh, my sweet baby!
67
00:03:19,617 --> 00:03:21,266
Flanders, I owe ya one.
68
00:03:21,285 --> 00:03:23,452
Well, sir, could you
give me back my Allen wrench?
69
00:03:24,096 --> 00:03:25,696
This guy names his tools.
70
00:03:25,790 --> 00:03:29,625
Grampa, I'm afraid we'll never
ask you to babysit again.
71
00:03:29,794 --> 00:03:31,868
Who says I want to?
You never even pay me!
72
00:03:32,021 --> 00:03:34,630
Well, you can rest easy
knowing if anything did happen,
73
00:03:34,781 --> 00:03:37,024
she has the only
insurance you truly need.
74
00:03:37,042 --> 00:03:39,026
A simple Christian baptism.
75
00:03:39,044 --> 00:03:41,470
Actually, we haven't gotten around
76
00:03:41,697 --> 00:03:42,879
to baptizing her yet.
77
00:03:42,956 --> 00:03:44,698
You mean this child could've been
78
00:03:44,717 --> 00:03:46,291
cast into God's basement
79
00:03:46,310 --> 00:03:49,094
of eternal burning,
because you were "too busy"?
80
00:03:49,129 --> 00:03:52,039
We could baptize her soon,
if you want to be the godfather.
81
00:03:52,057 --> 00:03:54,739
Oh, no can-doodily.
I'm already the godfather
82
00:03:54,774 --> 00:03:56,981
to 1,100 children. Take one of these.
83
00:03:57,016 --> 00:03:58,821
It'll buzz when I have an opening.
84
00:03:59,272 --> 00:04:00,697
This is for a baptism?
85
00:04:00,849 --> 00:04:04,609
My wife is Shinto and I worship
the Klingon faith of Ba-a-a-a.
86
00:04:04,686 --> 00:04:06,703
We thought this was for Tony Roma's.
87
00:04:06,797 --> 00:04:08,371
Good night!
88
00:04:09,466 --> 00:04:13,284
I can't stop thinking about
Maggie not being baptized.
89
00:04:13,378 --> 00:04:15,545
What if... the unspeakable happens?
90
00:04:15,697 --> 00:04:17,472
Are you saying that just
because we don't splash
91
00:04:17,699 --> 00:04:20,050
a little water on her
she's gonna burn forever?
92
00:04:20,202 --> 00:04:22,052
Sleep well,
knowing current religious thought
93
00:04:22,204 --> 00:04:24,128
is Maggie won't go to Hell.
94
00:04:24,148 --> 00:04:26,964
Although that's always up for debate.
95
00:04:26,984 --> 00:04:29,276
Mm.
96
00:04:33,732 --> 00:04:35,565
Hmm.
97
00:04:36,987 --> 00:04:38,510
Ah! Ah.
98
00:04:43,650 --> 00:04:45,592
Nice and unbaptized.
99
00:04:45,594 --> 00:04:48,728
She'll play in an unsanitary ball pit
100
00:04:48,822 --> 00:04:50,822
for all eternity.
101
00:04:50,916 --> 00:04:52,591
_
102
00:04:53,177 --> 00:04:55,326
And I'm here, too!
103
00:04:55,420 --> 00:04:58,162
And I've got Milhouse
growing on my back.
104
00:04:58,256 --> 00:05:00,740
I'm the front and you're the back!
105
00:05:00,759 --> 00:05:02,409
I'm the front!
106
00:05:02,427 --> 00:05:03,510
Ow!
107
00:05:04,413 --> 00:05:07,171
We have to get Maggie baptized now.
108
00:05:07,191 --> 00:05:09,583
Either Patty or Selma
could be the godmother.
109
00:05:09,676 --> 00:05:11,918
Well, that would insult one of them.
110
00:05:12,011 --> 00:05:13,695
But I want to insult both of them.
111
00:05:13,847 --> 00:05:15,680
What we really need
112
00:05:15,774 --> 00:05:17,199
for the godfather
113
00:05:17,350 --> 00:05:19,016
is someone who goes to church weekly,
114
00:05:19,111 --> 00:05:21,111
not the Christmas and Easter crowd.
115
00:05:21,205 --> 00:05:23,187
Lousy part-time Protestants.
116
00:05:23,281 --> 00:05:25,265
I go every week and sleep through mass
117
00:05:25,283 --> 00:05:26,858
like a real Christian.
118
00:05:26,952 --> 00:05:29,119
Homie, this is important to me.
119
00:05:29,213 --> 00:05:31,362
I get it, but can't this wait?
120
00:05:31,382 --> 00:05:34,049
You go find her a godfather!
121
00:05:34,200 --> 00:05:36,676
The classiest person you know.
122
00:05:40,557 --> 00:05:41,965
- Hey!
- Wait a minute!
123
00:05:42,059 --> 00:05:43,633
I wasn't watching that!
124
00:05:43,785 --> 00:05:44,893
Guys, this is serious.
125
00:05:45,120 --> 00:05:47,137
I'm looking for a godfather
for my little angel.
126
00:05:47,289 --> 00:05:49,806
Aw, what a cutie.
Let me give her a sip of beer.
127
00:05:49,958 --> 00:05:51,883
Okay, you're out.
128
00:05:51,977 --> 00:05:53,309
If I'm out, Carl's out.
129
00:05:53,478 --> 00:05:56,220
I decide who tells me what to do. Moe?
130
00:05:56,240 --> 00:05:59,557
You're out, Carl.
So, Homer, I hear you're lookin' for...
131
00:05:59,651 --> 00:06:00,967
You're out. Barney?
132
00:06:00,986 --> 00:06:03,078
- You're out.
- Aw!
133
00:06:03,305 --> 00:06:05,155
Godfather? Well let's see.
134
00:06:05,249 --> 00:06:07,207
I have done a great job with Ralphie.
135
00:06:08,902 --> 00:06:10,660
Wiggum out.
136
00:06:10,812 --> 00:06:13,922
Don't worry, sweetie.
You don't need a godfather right away.
137
00:06:14,149 --> 00:06:16,591
You're gonna live a long, long time.
138
00:06:18,912 --> 00:06:22,656
Here's another avoidable
death you've gotten us into.
139
00:06:30,055 --> 00:06:31,346
Fat Tony!
140
00:06:31,381 --> 00:06:32,603
You saved us!
141
00:06:32,638 --> 00:06:35,277
Not I. It was the Blessed Mother.
142
00:06:36,780 --> 00:06:38,354
You're religious, too.
143
00:06:38,523 --> 00:06:40,690
You'd be a great godfather,
if it weren't for...
144
00:06:40,842 --> 00:06:42,600
If it weren't for what?
145
00:06:42,694 --> 00:06:44,769
Uh... you know...
146
00:06:44,846 --> 00:06:46,955
No, I do not know.
147
00:06:48,107 --> 00:06:50,625
What a cute little bambina.
148
00:06:52,204 --> 00:06:53,520
I accept your offer.
149
00:06:53,613 --> 00:06:56,447
I will be godfather to your child.
150
00:06:56,541 --> 00:06:57,544
Yeah, but, but, but...
151
00:06:57,617 --> 00:07:00,877
You did offer it to me, didn't you?
152
00:07:01,809 --> 00:07:03,713
He said it. We got it all on tape.
153
00:07:04,702 --> 00:07:06,308
I truly appreciate this.
154
00:07:06,459 --> 00:07:09,303
I have nothing innocent
and pure in my life,
155
00:07:09,338 --> 00:07:12,169
but now I have this sweet little angel.
156
00:07:12,204 --> 00:07:15,375
Great, great. This'll be
just like The Godfather.
157
00:07:15,393 --> 00:07:17,544
- The what?
- You know, the movie The Godfather.
158
00:07:17,637 --> 00:07:19,488
- Never heard of it.
- It's about a guy like you,
159
00:07:19,715 --> 00:07:22,732
- who does what you do.
- Which is what?
160
00:07:22,884 --> 00:07:24,551
Um, legitimate business.
161
00:07:24,569 --> 00:07:27,403
He sounds like quite the fellow,
this godfather.
162
00:07:27,498 --> 00:07:29,831
I've seen Shark Tale and Analyze This,
163
00:07:29,983 --> 00:07:31,908
but that sounds even better.
164
00:07:32,077 --> 00:07:33,893
Fat Tony can't be godfather.
165
00:07:33,912 --> 00:07:36,246
We'd be better off with Mr. Burns.
166
00:07:36,398 --> 00:07:38,823
I asked him.
He's allergic to new baby smell.
167
00:07:41,262 --> 00:07:43,586
Pardon me for dropping by unannounced,
168
00:07:43,739 --> 00:07:47,182
but I could not help but notice
that my goddaughter-to-be has
169
00:07:47,409 --> 00:07:51,311
an outdated car seat facing
in the wrong direction.
170
00:07:56,585 --> 00:07:58,935
So, I have taken the
liberty of purchasing you
171
00:07:59,029 --> 00:08:01,437
the most exclusive, top-of-the-line
172
00:08:01,590 --> 00:08:05,492
car seat: the Ferrari Protect-a-rossa.
173
00:08:07,204 --> 00:08:09,596
Well, that's very nice, but...
174
00:08:09,614 --> 00:08:13,266
And you, the mama,
will drive her more safely
175
00:08:13,285 --> 00:08:17,183
in this Luxus SUV I have
leased in your name.
176
00:08:17,218 --> 00:08:18,313
It's got everything.
177
00:08:18,364 --> 00:08:20,106
Blindspot monitors...
178
00:08:20,199 --> 00:08:22,292
built-in humidor, a GPS
179
00:08:22,386 --> 00:08:24,535
that doesn't think it's better than you.
180
00:08:25,140 --> 00:08:26,796
Sure, let's try it your way.
181
00:08:26,948 --> 00:08:29,015
- Oh...
- Hmm?
182
00:08:30,376 --> 00:08:33,803
Fat Tony, I'm sorry,
but you can't be the godfather.
183
00:08:33,955 --> 00:08:35,455
Marge, think about this.
184
00:08:35,548 --> 00:08:37,957
Your baby will want to
go to an elite preschool,
185
00:08:37,959 --> 00:08:39,642
a prestigious prep school,
186
00:08:39,795 --> 00:08:41,294
a college with the ivy.
187
00:08:41,387 --> 00:08:43,905
I could help you with all these things.
188
00:08:44,132 --> 00:08:45,632
You can really do that?
189
00:08:45,650 --> 00:08:48,225
With the soccer coaches
and admissions officers
190
00:08:48,245 --> 00:08:51,705
I have in my pocket like
so many yogurt melties.
191
00:08:56,004 --> 00:08:58,628
We'll play along until
we can get out of it.
192
00:09:00,073 --> 00:09:02,048
Godfather.
193
00:09:04,152 --> 00:09:06,636
Welcome to the family.
194
00:09:07,672 --> 00:09:10,056
Welcome to the family.
195
00:09:19,184 --> 00:09:20,350
Okay, just get through this.
196
00:09:20,444 --> 00:09:22,535
Then you never see the godparents again.
197
00:09:22,845 --> 00:09:25,363
Always so nice to see you, Fat Tony.
198
00:09:25,514 --> 00:09:26,906
Is everything okay?
199
00:09:28,610 --> 00:09:30,869
Please, please, say it's okay.
200
00:09:31,020 --> 00:09:32,445
Why you no answering?
201
00:09:32,597 --> 00:09:35,615
I'm a-gonna die!
And I've never been-a to Italy!
202
00:09:37,026 --> 00:09:38,543
Everything's fine.
203
00:09:38,694 --> 00:09:41,546
Ah, I knew it. Have-a some parmesan.
204
00:09:42,128 --> 00:09:45,458
My hand! It's-a having a heart attack!
205
00:09:45,552 --> 00:09:49,053
Now, I take my duties
as godfather seriously.
206
00:09:49,280 --> 00:09:51,246
I might almost be intrusive.
207
00:09:51,299 --> 00:09:52,448
Almost.
208
00:09:52,467 --> 00:09:53,725
First, I want to help
209
00:09:53,952 --> 00:09:56,469
with little Margaret's
religious development.
210
00:09:56,621 --> 00:09:59,046
For my first communion,
my sainted mother gave me
211
00:09:59,065 --> 00:10:02,808
this book and ten dollars,
which was a fortune to me.
212
00:10:02,961 --> 00:10:04,694
I never spent it.
213
00:10:06,131 --> 00:10:07,363
Mama!
214
00:10:09,984 --> 00:10:11,984
First, the queen of all saints,
215
00:10:12,078 --> 00:10:13,970
Mary, the only woman in history
216
00:10:13,988 --> 00:10:17,415
who had the ugatz to be
a mother and a virgin.
217
00:10:17,566 --> 00:10:19,976
Actually,
the virgin birth is the doctrine
218
00:10:20,069 --> 00:10:21,661
of traditional Christianity.
219
00:10:21,755 --> 00:10:23,146
Not Protestants.
220
00:10:23,164 --> 00:10:24,981
La beata madre è stata
221
00:10:24,999 --> 00:10:26,832
concepita senza peccato originale.
222
00:10:26,985 --> 00:10:30,244
Quindi è possibile che
sia madre e vergine.
223
00:10:30,263 --> 00:10:31,554
Oh. Got it.
224
00:10:32,507 --> 00:10:34,581
This is Saint Lucia,
225
00:10:34,750 --> 00:10:37,435
which may or may not
be where my money is.
226
00:10:37,662 --> 00:10:40,179
And this is St. Zeno of Verona,
227
00:10:40,273 --> 00:10:42,774
the saint of learning to speak.
228
00:10:42,925 --> 00:10:44,984
For you, Margaret.
229
00:10:46,595 --> 00:10:47,761
Hmm.
230
00:10:47,839 --> 00:10:50,865
Ah, you got to love
a religion with merch.
231
00:10:53,027 --> 00:10:55,286
Maybe this could work out.
232
00:10:55,438 --> 00:10:58,848
You just enjoy riding
in a safe car for once.
233
00:10:58,941 --> 00:11:01,442
Yes! Yes! Yes, I do!
234
00:11:01,461 --> 00:11:03,519
For the family.
235
00:11:03,612 --> 00:11:05,630
Stop so we can do the door again.
236
00:11:06,977 --> 00:11:09,467
Whoa, Mama!
237
00:11:10,304 --> 00:11:11,386
D'oh!
238
00:11:12,621 --> 00:11:15,031
I can't believe the
boss has us babysitting.
239
00:11:15,124 --> 00:11:17,684
I broke out of prison for this?
240
00:11:21,130 --> 00:11:22,629
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
241
00:11:22,724 --> 00:11:25,483
Careful, those babies got
those super sharp fingernails!
242
00:11:28,229 --> 00:11:30,405
Here ya go, Baby Boss.
243
00:11:36,997 --> 00:11:38,329
Mangia. Mangia.
244
00:11:38,556 --> 00:11:39,813
Leave no evidence.
245
00:11:39,907 --> 00:11:41,648
Boss, Benny down at the liquor store
246
00:11:41,668 --> 00:11:44,076
is late on his payment. Again.
247
00:11:44,170 --> 00:11:45,986
Let me break his kneecaps.
248
00:11:46,155 --> 00:11:47,338
Marone a mi!
249
00:11:47,490 --> 00:11:49,749
You never ever talk that
way in front of a baby.
250
00:11:49,901 --> 00:11:51,509
Uh, uh, okay, uh,
251
00:11:51,736 --> 00:11:54,178
what if we give him a
boo-boo to the brain?
252
00:11:54,255 --> 00:11:56,997
Make him go night-night forever?
253
00:11:57,091 --> 00:11:58,215
Disgusting!
254
00:11:58,442 --> 00:12:00,576
You give the kiss of
death with that mouth?
255
00:12:00,595 --> 00:12:03,170
Now, if you'll excuse me...
256
00:12:03,264 --> 00:12:05,339
I have to take sweet little Maggie
257
00:12:05,433 --> 00:12:07,508
to Guido and Me class.
258
00:12:09,512 --> 00:12:11,604
I think the boss is gettin' soft.
259
00:12:11,756 --> 00:12:13,364
Next thing you know, he'll be startin'
260
00:12:13,516 --> 00:12:15,533
a legitimate legitimate business!
261
00:12:15,760 --> 00:12:17,702
Eh, I think you're imagining things.
262
00:12:17,929 --> 00:12:21,355
♪ Twinkle, twinkle, little star ♪
263
00:12:21,374 --> 00:12:23,949
♪ Let me hotwire you a car ♪
264
00:12:24,102 --> 00:12:27,119
♪ We'll change the plates,
I know a guy ♪
265
00:12:27,213 --> 00:12:30,122
♪ You'll be my little alibi. ♪
266
00:12:31,662 --> 00:12:32,958
You stole my heart.
267
00:12:33,053 --> 00:12:34,944
You little criminal.
268
00:12:40,226 --> 00:12:42,175
Ah, it's-a so sad.
269
00:12:42,195 --> 00:12:44,603
Fat Tony has been a very good boss.
270
00:12:44,772 --> 00:12:48,774
I have too much respect
for him not to kill him.
271
00:12:48,868 --> 00:12:51,093
Eh, what do you think, Johnny Tightlips?
272
00:12:51,186 --> 00:12:53,762
I don't want to do nothin' to nobody.
273
00:12:53,781 --> 00:12:56,281
So... you want to do
somethin' to somebody.
274
00:12:56,434 --> 00:12:57,933
Exactly.
275
00:12:58,026 --> 00:13:00,102
Does Maggie seem different to you?
276
00:13:00,121 --> 00:13:01,286
I'm worried.
277
00:13:01,381 --> 00:13:03,272
Uh, Marge, let me put it this way.
278
00:13:03,441 --> 00:13:04,940
We can't be bad parents,
279
00:13:04,959 --> 00:13:07,868
because bad parents
can't get their kid into...
280
00:13:07,887 --> 00:13:10,613
the finest preschool in town!
281
00:13:10,631 --> 00:13:12,038
Maggie has been admitted
282
00:13:12,133 --> 00:13:14,541
to the Preschool for
the Performing Arts?
283
00:13:14,619 --> 00:13:16,560
They have a three-year wait.
284
00:13:16,712 --> 00:13:19,121
Is she in the morning
class or afternoon?
285
00:13:19,140 --> 00:13:20,380
Morning.
286
00:13:20,400 --> 00:13:22,233
Mm.
287
00:13:23,096 --> 00:13:24,885
I'm afraid we have an agreement
288
00:13:24,979 --> 00:13:26,812
and you have not held up your end.
289
00:13:26,964 --> 00:13:29,407
We are going for a ride.
290
00:13:35,473 --> 00:13:37,915
No!
291
00:13:39,326 --> 00:13:42,736
No goddaughter of mine
will miss Sunday service.
292
00:13:42,813 --> 00:13:44,738
Oh, but I'm hungover.
293
00:13:44,815 --> 00:13:46,907
We were gonna go at 1:00 p.m.
294
00:13:47,001 --> 00:13:49,093
I'm afraid there ain't
no 1:00 p.m. no more.
295
00:13:49,244 --> 00:13:51,411
Low attendance whacked
it from the schedule.
296
00:13:51,431 --> 00:13:52,655
I knew it.
297
00:13:52,748 --> 00:13:53,839
You make a deal with the devil,
298
00:13:53,933 --> 00:13:55,266
and look where you wind up.
299
00:13:55,998 --> 00:13:57,092
Wake up.
300
00:13:58,162 --> 00:13:59,419
Oh, come on, man.
301
00:13:59,497 --> 00:14:00,996
Even the priest is asleep.
302
00:14:02,667 --> 00:14:05,776
Please rise and open your hymnals.
303
00:14:06,929 --> 00:14:10,022
He said open your book.
304
00:14:10,950 --> 00:14:14,026
♪ You were so right,
I'm a moron, I'm so frightened ♪
305
00:14:14,178 --> 00:14:18,164
♪ Bail us out now, I am out of ideas. ♪
306
00:14:20,701 --> 00:14:23,018
Look, if we're direct and
say he can't be godfather,
307
00:14:23,037 --> 00:14:24,870
what's the worst that can happen?
308
00:14:25,022 --> 00:14:26,780
Did you see The Godfather?
309
00:14:26,874 --> 00:14:28,373
I saw the wedding part.
310
00:14:28,468 --> 00:14:30,134
Does anything happen after that?
311
00:14:30,285 --> 00:14:33,137
That Carlo seems like
a wonderful husband.
312
00:14:33,364 --> 00:14:36,198
- What are you talking about?
- Uh, Mister Fat?
313
00:14:36,217 --> 00:14:39,310
There's a non-whacking matter
I need to discuss with you.
314
00:14:39,461 --> 00:14:41,220
I also have to tell you something.
315
00:14:41,372 --> 00:14:44,723
Your daughter is cute, smart,
and sweet as a hung jury.
316
00:14:44,875 --> 00:14:47,151
So I will honor all of you next Sunday
317
00:14:47,378 --> 00:14:50,470
with tickets to Itchy and
Scratchy's Christmas On Ice.
318
00:14:50,564 --> 00:14:54,641
Now, what did you want to tell me?
319
00:14:54,660 --> 00:14:56,827
I, um, uh, stall, stall...
320
00:14:56,904 --> 00:14:58,887
play for time...
321
00:14:58,906 --> 00:15:01,648
I wanted to tell you how
great you look in that suit.
322
00:15:01,667 --> 00:15:03,058
Why, thank you.
323
00:15:03,077 --> 00:15:04,651
Why do people have such difficulty
324
00:15:04,670 --> 00:15:06,212
telling me how great I am?
325
00:15:10,659 --> 00:15:12,843
This is the first business I've had
326
00:15:12,995 --> 00:15:15,495
where in the back room
is just more of the same.
327
00:15:16,884 --> 00:15:19,666
- Thoughts?
- Hey, these diaper bags are great.
328
00:15:19,760 --> 00:15:21,744
You could hide a brick
of nose candy in here.
329
00:15:21,837 --> 00:15:24,337
No, you mezzo arguto paisan!
330
00:15:24,357 --> 00:15:25,839
This is all aboveboard.
331
00:15:25,933 --> 00:15:27,674
I want to be family friendly.
332
00:15:27,768 --> 00:15:30,343
You mean "the family" family?
333
00:15:30,437 --> 00:15:32,454
I mean every family!
334
00:15:32,514 --> 00:15:34,256
Except the Branzinos.
335
00:15:34,349 --> 00:15:35,758
Death to them.
336
00:15:35,776 --> 00:15:36,925
Death to them.
337
00:15:37,019 --> 00:15:38,068
Hey, boss, maybe you can get
338
00:15:38,095 --> 00:15:40,279
your little Maggie one of these.
339
00:15:40,431 --> 00:15:43,165
You would body shame a baby?!
340
00:15:45,948 --> 00:15:47,193
I've seen enough.
341
00:15:47,362 --> 00:15:49,213
This Sunday we make our move.
342
00:15:49,364 --> 00:15:50,881
Can we make it Saturday? I got a thing.
343
00:15:51,108 --> 00:15:53,108
- Move your thing.
- I already moved it
344
00:15:53,127 --> 00:15:54,885
for the thing that was
cancelled for the you know what
345
00:15:55,112 --> 00:15:56,628
where we did that thing we did not do.
346
00:15:56,781 --> 00:15:58,872
That didn't happen two weeks ago.
347
00:15:58,891 --> 00:16:00,540
You don't know about that!
348
00:16:00,634 --> 00:16:03,468
You don't know what I don't know.
349
00:16:03,563 --> 00:16:06,121
Um, we certainly appreciate
350
00:16:06,140 --> 00:16:07,973
all you've done for us.
351
00:16:08,125 --> 00:16:11,277
Maggie has all the bling
a toddler could want.
352
00:16:14,131 --> 00:16:15,155
Don't look at me.
353
00:16:15,249 --> 00:16:17,324
They fell off the back of a tricycle.
354
00:16:21,498 --> 00:16:23,122
What have we done?
355
00:16:25,734 --> 00:16:27,643
Uh, Maggie! What are ya doin'?
356
00:16:27,661 --> 00:16:29,587
I didn't mean it! Maggie!
357
00:16:30,423 --> 00:16:32,756
Fat Tony, get away from my kid!
358
00:16:34,985 --> 00:16:36,635
That's it.
359
00:16:38,598 --> 00:16:41,432
Fine. I see.
360
00:16:41,583 --> 00:16:44,660
Excuse me, there is an urgent matter
361
00:16:44,829 --> 00:16:46,645
I must attend to.
362
00:16:59,844 --> 00:17:02,602
Homer, can I tell you a little secret?
363
00:17:02,622 --> 00:17:05,180
- No, no, please don't!
- It's a good secret.
364
00:17:05,199 --> 00:17:08,558
I'm finally getting out of
this terrible business I'm in.
365
00:17:08,593 --> 00:17:11,308
And into the slightly
less cutthroat business
366
00:17:11,343 --> 00:17:12,537
of maternity wear.
367
00:17:12,690 --> 00:17:14,465
I'm gonna get my soul back.
368
00:17:14,541 --> 00:17:17,376
And Maggie is my inspiration.
369
00:17:17,528 --> 00:17:19,619
- Aw.
- Give me one more day
370
00:17:19,639 --> 00:17:21,472
to prove that I belong in her life.
371
00:17:21,699 --> 00:17:23,307
I'll see what I can do.
372
00:17:26,795 --> 00:17:28,704
Legs! Louie! Get in here!
373
00:17:28,797 --> 00:17:29,963
Dispose of this.
374
00:17:29,982 --> 00:17:33,025
I don't want to know where or how.
375
00:17:41,327 --> 00:17:44,069
Ain't nobody gonna find this now.
376
00:17:44,163 --> 00:17:47,122
Uh, marone. You never forget that smell.
377
00:18:03,506 --> 00:18:05,015
Remember: take the gun.
378
00:18:05,167 --> 00:18:06,850
Leave the Zamboni.
379
00:18:07,077 --> 00:18:09,578
Okay, this is it. I'm ending it today.
380
00:18:09,671 --> 00:18:12,898
In a public place with
a lot of witnesses.
381
00:18:18,698 --> 00:18:21,953
Well, Fat Tony, this is really fun,
382
00:18:21,988 --> 00:18:23,941
but where is everyone else?
383
00:18:23,976 --> 00:18:25,703
On the suggestion of my coworkers,
384
00:18:25,930 --> 00:18:28,372
who only have my best interests in mind,
385
00:18:28,599 --> 00:18:30,432
I bought out the whole arena
386
00:18:30,525 --> 00:18:33,026
for my dear little Maggie.
387
00:18:33,195 --> 00:18:35,760
No audience means no witnesses!
388
00:18:35,795 --> 00:18:37,249
What's going on?
389
00:18:37,284 --> 00:18:39,057
Fat Tony, I beg you!
390
00:18:39,109 --> 00:18:41,868
Stop being my daughter's godfather!
391
00:18:41,887 --> 00:18:44,762
If you do, I'll clean for you,
I'll cook for you.
392
00:18:44,797 --> 00:18:46,742
I'll be your mama!
393
00:18:46,777 --> 00:18:48,183
God rest her soul.
394
00:18:49,544 --> 00:18:51,044
I must refuse your offer.
395
00:18:51,538 --> 00:18:54,131
I made a promise to
God to watch your baby.
396
00:18:54,158 --> 00:18:56,949
And he's the only boss I answer to.
397
00:18:57,043 --> 00:19:00,286
Except that guy in Kansas City.
398
00:19:00,380 --> 00:19:01,972
Oh, no! No!
399
00:19:02,123 --> 00:19:03,548
We're stuck with him forever!
400
00:19:03,700 --> 00:19:05,392
Maggie's in Hell already!
401
00:19:14,153 --> 00:19:15,710
Johnny Tightlips!
402
00:19:16,464 --> 00:19:17,470
This is it, Tony.
403
00:19:17,489 --> 00:19:20,231
You did the worst thing
a mob boss could ever do.
404
00:19:20,384 --> 00:19:22,384
Care about somebody else.
405
00:19:22,402 --> 00:19:25,162
I thought you was with
me on this double cross!
406
00:19:25,389 --> 00:19:28,147
We'll never turn on Tony!
He's my cousin!
407
00:19:28,167 --> 00:19:29,666
I thought he was my cousin!
408
00:19:29,893 --> 00:19:31,242
Well, he's somebody's cousin.
409
00:19:31,395 --> 00:19:33,561
And in this world, that's what counts.
410
00:19:33,563 --> 00:19:35,321
You would betray me?
411
00:19:39,753 --> 00:19:42,070
No, Maggie, no! I'm sorry!
412
00:19:42,088 --> 00:19:44,664
- That's not me!
- Oh, isn't it?
413
00:19:44,832 --> 00:19:46,241
Oh, my God, you're right.
414
00:19:46,334 --> 00:19:47,851
I cannot change who I am.
415
00:19:48,078 --> 00:19:50,169
Also that maternity store was a joke.
416
00:19:50,263 --> 00:19:52,004
They look, but don't buy.
417
00:19:52,024 --> 00:19:54,933
But, Maggie, it's not too late
for you to go straight.
418
00:19:55,027 --> 00:19:57,585
I'm stepping back as godfather.
419
00:19:57,679 --> 00:19:58,895
- Finally.
- Thank God.
420
00:20:00,532 --> 00:20:01,606
Oops.
421
00:20:01,700 --> 00:20:04,426
Here's the keys to the SUV.
422
00:20:10,100 --> 00:20:12,951
You have to let go for
me to take them back.
423
00:20:13,103 --> 00:20:14,436
I know, let me just
424
00:20:14,454 --> 00:20:16,454
open the doors one more time.
425
00:20:20,541 --> 00:20:21,943
Maggie, my darling.
426
00:20:22,036 --> 00:20:24,370
Thank you for reminding me of everything
427
00:20:24,389 --> 00:20:26,539
that's good and sweet in this world.
428
00:20:26,633 --> 00:20:28,708
And now, ciao bella.
429
00:20:29,462 --> 00:20:32,562
Ew, uh, before you go... could you?
430
00:20:32,714 --> 00:20:34,397
Just when I thought I was out,
431
00:20:34,566 --> 00:20:37,067
they drag me back in.
432
00:20:51,491 --> 00:20:52,748
I'm not afraid to say it.
433
00:20:52,842 --> 00:20:54,767
If this keeps up, I'm calling HR.
434
00:20:54,994 --> 00:20:57,895
You mean Harry the Rat?
He's buried right over there.
435
00:21:31,047 --> 00:21:33,348
Shh!
436
00:21:35,082 --> 00:21:37,963
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