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1
00:00:04,510 --> 00:00:07,150
MRS. GUMBLE:
Barney, did you
finish your milk?
2
00:00:07,147 --> 00:00:08,987
Yes, Ma.
(burps)
3
00:00:08,985 --> 00:00:11,655
MRS. GUMBLE:
Have fun playing in the gutter!
4
00:00:11,657 --> 00:00:13,487
BARNEY:
Anchors aweigh!
5
00:00:13,493 --> 00:00:15,503
(laughing)
6
00:00:15,497 --> 00:00:16,527
It's floating.
7
00:00:16,534 --> 00:00:17,904
It's still floating!
8
00:00:17,903 --> 00:00:21,313
This is fun to me.
I love you, paper boat!
9
00:00:21,309 --> 00:00:22,579
(laughs)
10
00:00:22,579 --> 00:00:23,679
Oh, no!
11
00:00:23,681 --> 00:00:25,481
Aw...
12
00:00:26,119 --> 00:00:27,989
- Hiya, Barn.
-(gasps)
13
00:00:27,989 --> 00:00:30,089
I'm Krusto, the funniest clown
14
00:00:30,093 --> 00:00:31,963
in the whole wide world.
15
00:00:31,964 --> 00:00:35,514
Uh, people who have to tell you
they're funny usually aren't.
16
00:00:35,505 --> 00:00:37,775
Can I get my boat back,
sewer clown?
17
00:00:37,776 --> 00:00:39,076
Why, sure.
18
00:00:39,078 --> 00:00:42,278
Just reach in and take it.
19
00:00:43,086 --> 00:00:45,386
Hmm.
(straining)
20
00:00:45,390 --> 00:00:49,030
That's right, build the tension.
21
00:00:49,031 --> 00:00:50,601
(growls)
22
00:00:50,602 --> 00:00:51,872
BARNEY: Aah!
23
00:00:51,870 --> 00:00:54,010
Keep the boat!
Keep the boat!
24
00:00:54,008 --> 00:00:57,478
Ow! Ow!
(screaming)
25
00:00:57,481 --> 00:00:59,491
♪
26
00:01:13,614 --> 00:01:15,084
Don't worry, Barn.
27
00:01:15,083 --> 00:01:18,423
When a kid goes missing in this
town, we find them.
28
00:01:19,425 --> 00:01:21,295
Hmm... Mm...
29
00:01:22,097 --> 00:01:23,497
Sorry, Waylon.
30
00:01:23,501 --> 00:01:24,771
Hey there, Ruthie.
31
00:01:24,770 --> 00:01:26,310
How are the little ones?
32
00:01:26,306 --> 00:01:29,146
Oh, you know kids.
Still missin.'
33
00:01:29,145 --> 00:01:31,845
Ah, they disappear
so fast, don't they?
34
00:01:31,850 --> 00:01:33,520
(chuckles)
35
00:01:35,057 --> 00:01:37,357
♪
36
00:01:39,866 --> 00:01:41,036
(grunting)
37
00:01:41,035 --> 00:01:42,865
(laughing)
38
00:01:42,872 --> 00:01:44,982
Hey there, Simpson.
39
00:01:44,977 --> 00:01:47,307
Super-Intense-Kid Chalmers!
40
00:01:47,314 --> 00:01:50,154
Look what I traded my dog for.
41
00:01:50,153 --> 00:01:52,363
-(yelps)
-(cackles)
42
00:01:53,326 --> 00:01:54,356
Huh?
43
00:01:56,199 --> 00:01:59,009
Creepy clown, go get help!
44
00:01:59,005 --> 00:02:00,465
- Hmm?
- Hmm?
- Hmm?
45
00:02:00,474 --> 00:02:01,884
(grunting)
46
00:02:04,516 --> 00:02:06,916
After him!
47
00:02:06,920 --> 00:02:09,290
(grunting)
48
00:02:16,907 --> 00:02:19,447
Step away from
the whimpering coward.
49
00:02:19,445 --> 00:02:20,515
(grunting)
50
00:02:24,121 --> 00:02:27,601
Time to bring out the big guns.
51
00:02:30,668 --> 00:02:32,168
(grunting)
52
00:02:33,641 --> 00:02:35,341
Aah! (groans)
53
00:02:35,344 --> 00:02:36,984
It's a fair fight.
54
00:02:36,980 --> 00:02:38,250
Let's run away!
55
00:02:38,249 --> 00:02:40,589
(all whimpering)
56
00:02:40,588 --> 00:02:42,058
HOMER: Hmm?
57
00:02:42,057 --> 00:02:45,527
Oh, oh, you're hurt,
you poor thing.
58
00:02:45,531 --> 00:02:48,701
No girl has ever
called me a "thing" before.
59
00:02:48,704 --> 00:02:50,244
I've seen you guys around.
60
00:02:50,240 --> 00:02:52,280
You're the school outsiders,
aren't you?
61
00:02:52,277 --> 00:02:55,717
We sure are.
The comic book nerd, the tomboy.
62
00:02:55,718 --> 00:02:57,148
The scuzz.
63
00:02:57,154 --> 00:02:59,394
And the one Black kid
in all of Maine.
64
00:02:59,392 --> 00:03:01,632
We call ourselves
The Losers Club.
65
00:03:01,630 --> 00:03:04,600
It's a name we are
no longer fighting.
66
00:03:04,603 --> 00:03:05,813
Ooh.
67
00:03:05,805 --> 00:03:09,705
We have a first aid kit
in our clubhouse. Come on.
68
00:03:11,015 --> 00:03:13,145
Um, FYI, new guy.
69
00:03:13,153 --> 00:03:15,563
I called dibs on Marge
in the second grade.
70
00:03:15,558 --> 00:03:17,228
Find your own secret knockout
71
00:03:17,227 --> 00:03:20,637
who doesn't recognize
her own self-worth. (grunts)
72
00:03:22,939 --> 00:03:24,539
Sweet clubhouse, right?
73
00:03:24,543 --> 00:03:27,553
They used it to store
tartar sauce during the war.
74
00:03:27,549 --> 00:03:29,689
You're all gonna
think I'm crazy,
75
00:03:29,686 --> 00:03:32,256
but when those bullies
were gonna kill me,
76
00:03:32,257 --> 00:03:35,327
I saw an evil clown.
77
00:03:35,330 --> 00:03:38,170
I-I've seen the clown, too.
78
00:03:38,169 --> 00:03:41,609
I was in the bathroom,
uh, painting my nails...
79
00:03:42,377 --> 00:03:44,177
Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow,
ow, ow, ow, ow!
80
00:03:44,181 --> 00:03:46,051
(timer dings)
81
00:03:46,052 --> 00:03:47,292
Hmm? (grunts)
82
00:03:47,287 --> 00:03:49,887
Come on, I need water.
83
00:03:49,893 --> 00:03:51,203
CLOWN:
How's about...
84
00:03:51,195 --> 00:03:53,195
a little seltzer?
85
00:03:53,199 --> 00:03:55,369
Aah!
86
00:03:56,573 --> 00:03:58,783
(whimpers)
87
00:03:58,778 --> 00:03:59,908
Help!
88
00:03:59,913 --> 00:04:02,323
He...
89
00:04:03,186 --> 00:04:05,626
(panting)
90
00:04:06,225 --> 00:04:08,155
-(burps)
- Holy moly,
91
00:04:08,163 --> 00:04:09,573
bleach your mustache.
92
00:04:09,566 --> 00:04:11,796
You look like El DeBarge.
93
00:04:13,306 --> 00:04:16,046
The clown knew my greatest fear:
94
00:04:16,045 --> 00:04:18,915
drowning in seltzer.
95
00:04:18,918 --> 00:04:21,258
- HOMER: Mm.
-(clears throat)
96
00:04:21,255 --> 00:04:22,725
I saw the clown, too.
97
00:04:22,725 --> 00:04:26,365
But he came to me
as a ventriloquist dummy.
98
00:04:26,365 --> 00:04:28,865
- Hey, kid.
- Hmm?
99
00:04:28,871 --> 00:04:31,941
I went on a date
with your mother last night.
100
00:04:32,946 --> 00:04:34,276
(whimpers)
101
00:04:34,281 --> 00:04:36,291
You might want to check her
for splinters!
102
00:04:36,285 --> 00:04:38,455
(cackles)
103
00:04:38,456 --> 00:04:41,256
He was implying they made love.
104
00:04:41,262 --> 00:04:44,032
I was in my bedroom, reading.
105
00:04:47,040 --> 00:04:49,610
Wanna swap spit?
106
00:04:49,613 --> 00:04:51,623
Aah!
107
00:04:52,384 --> 00:04:53,854
-(cackles)
- Aah!
108
00:04:53,854 --> 00:04:55,394
I saw him too.
109
00:04:55,390 --> 00:04:58,630
He came to me as the rotting
corpse of my grandmother
110
00:04:58,631 --> 00:05:00,641
in a hot tub full of maggots.
111
00:05:01,269 --> 00:05:03,409
We get it, we get it,
no need for a flashback.
112
00:05:03,406 --> 00:05:05,336
I bet that evil clown is the one
113
00:05:05,343 --> 00:05:07,483
who took all the missing kids
in town.
114
00:05:07,481 --> 00:05:10,251
We need to find out
what we're up against.
115
00:05:10,253 --> 00:05:13,793
Which means doing the thing
we all fear most:
116
00:05:13,794 --> 00:05:15,034
- homework.
- Aah!
117
00:05:15,030 --> 00:05:17,570
- Oh God, no.
- But it's summer.
118
00:05:24,816 --> 00:05:26,886
HOMER:
Your arm is summer lightning.
119
00:05:26,887 --> 00:05:28,787
Your bravery, the storm.
120
00:05:28,791 --> 00:05:30,431
Hmm. (gasps)
121
00:05:30,427 --> 00:05:33,867
Like a chimp at the zoo,
I'm bananas for you.
122
00:05:39,846 --> 00:05:41,016
MARGE:
Homer!
123
00:05:41,015 --> 00:05:44,015
Homer, I found him.
In this.
124
00:05:47,862 --> 00:05:50,432
The clown has been
in Kingfield before.
125
00:05:50,433 --> 00:05:52,973
He's always been here.
126
00:05:52,972 --> 00:05:54,712
BROCKMAN:
Channel 14 and Fume Champ
127
00:05:54,709 --> 00:05:57,179
Super-Leaded Gasoline present
128
00:05:57,180 --> 00:06:00,620
The Yuk-Yuk Hour
with Krusto the Clown.
129
00:06:00,621 --> 00:06:02,791
-(applause)
-(kids cheering)
130
00:06:02,792 --> 00:06:04,162
Hey, hey!
131
00:06:04,161 --> 00:06:07,131
Thanks for the big hand.
132
00:06:07,134 --> 00:06:08,604
(audience laughs)
133
00:06:08,604 --> 00:06:12,144
In 1936 he had a radio hour.
134
00:06:12,144 --> 00:06:14,454
In 1909, a vaudeville review.
135
00:06:14,448 --> 00:06:17,688
And in 1882, he was
an emcee for a freak show.
136
00:06:17,689 --> 00:06:19,589
And the strangest thing is...
137
00:06:19,593 --> 00:06:23,203
He was never, ever funny.
138
00:06:23,199 --> 00:06:25,839
He comes back every 27 years.
139
00:06:25,838 --> 00:06:27,238
And when he does...
140
00:06:27,241 --> 00:06:29,751
I gorge myself on pre-teens.
141
00:06:29,746 --> 00:06:30,776
ALL:
Aah!
142
00:06:30,781 --> 00:06:32,621
(laughs)
143
00:06:37,394 --> 00:06:39,374
Aah! Oh. (grunting)
144
00:06:39,365 --> 00:06:41,535
(kids whimper, scream)
145
00:06:44,509 --> 00:06:47,849
What's the difference
between a Twinkie and a fat kid?
146
00:06:47,849 --> 00:06:51,119
I don't feel guilty
when I eat a fat kid.
147
00:06:51,122 --> 00:06:53,562
(children laughing)
148
00:06:54,194 --> 00:06:56,504
Ah...
149
00:06:57,502 --> 00:06:59,812
Homer, catch!
150
00:07:00,975 --> 00:07:02,545
Gah! My wattle!
151
00:07:02,545 --> 00:07:04,715
My beautiful wattle!
152
00:07:04,716 --> 00:07:08,156
Now I'm really big and scary!
153
00:07:08,156 --> 00:07:09,686
(gasps)
154
00:07:11,095 --> 00:07:14,125
Temporary setba...
155
00:07:14,134 --> 00:07:16,744
I don't want to die
and be buried in a kid coffin.
156
00:07:16,740 --> 00:07:19,450
It costs the same
as a regular-sized.
157
00:07:19,445 --> 00:07:22,475
I overheard my parents
pricing 'em.
158
00:07:22,484 --> 00:07:24,864
-(sobbing)
- Calm down.
159
00:07:24,856 --> 00:07:27,486
(grunts)
Well, that's my fetish now.
160
00:07:27,494 --> 00:07:28,904
Look, don't you see?
161
00:07:28,897 --> 00:07:30,297
We hurt him.
162
00:07:30,300 --> 00:07:33,240
And if we can hurt him,
we can kill him.
163
00:07:33,239 --> 00:07:34,409
Ooh.
164
00:07:34,408 --> 00:07:36,348
Oh...
165
00:07:36,345 --> 00:07:38,575
♪
166
00:07:45,698 --> 00:07:47,368
Hmm?
167
00:07:47,367 --> 00:07:49,567
(scoffs)
"Bananas for you"?
168
00:07:50,440 --> 00:07:52,010
- HOMER: Mm?
- Oh!
169
00:07:52,010 --> 00:07:53,210
(laughing)
170
00:07:53,212 --> 00:07:54,952
That romantic
son of a bitch.
171
00:07:54,949 --> 00:07:57,859
When she reads this,
she'll be his forever.
172
00:08:01,362 --> 00:08:02,832
(all shudder)
173
00:08:08,209 --> 00:08:10,049
(all gasp)
174
00:08:14,088 --> 00:08:15,518
HOMER:
Free candy?
175
00:08:15,524 --> 00:08:17,494
(gasps) Let's eat it
before the clown shows up!
176
00:08:17,494 --> 00:08:19,604
-(laughs) Aah!
- Aah!
177
00:08:19,599 --> 00:08:21,499
Hey, hey, kids!
178
00:08:21,503 --> 00:08:22,973
What time is it?
179
00:08:22,972 --> 00:08:25,912
CHILDREN:
Time to laugh for Krusto.
180
00:08:25,911 --> 00:08:27,151
Attack!
181
00:08:28,149 --> 00:08:29,589
(exclaims)
182
00:08:29,586 --> 00:08:32,286
Our whimsical weapons...
they're useless.
183
00:08:32,290 --> 00:08:34,400
Don't you kids get it?
184
00:08:34,395 --> 00:08:36,165
I'm completely invinci...
185
00:08:36,165 --> 00:08:38,535
Whoa! (exclaiming)
186
00:08:45,216 --> 00:08:47,186
Aah!
187
00:08:47,187 --> 00:08:49,457
(groans, grunts)
188
00:08:49,458 --> 00:08:51,198
Oh!
189
00:08:51,195 --> 00:08:53,065
(laughing)
190
00:08:54,001 --> 00:08:56,311
Wait, I never
heard that before.
191
00:08:56,305 --> 00:08:59,705
Real laughter.
That I actually earned.
192
00:08:59,713 --> 00:09:02,323
Hey, hey, kids,
if you like that,
193
00:09:02,317 --> 00:09:03,847
watch this.
194
00:09:03,854 --> 00:09:05,524
(exclaiming)
195
00:09:07,294 --> 00:09:08,604
Hot!
196
00:09:08,597 --> 00:09:09,997
(laughing)
197
00:09:12,839 --> 00:09:14,369
Eh? Eh?
198
00:09:14,374 --> 00:09:16,484
He's killing himself
for laughs.
199
00:09:16,479 --> 00:09:18,279
Hey, clown.
200
00:09:18,282 --> 00:09:19,752
Why don't you eat these?
201
00:09:20,654 --> 00:09:23,594
Oh!
Cherry bombs in the mouth.
202
00:09:23,594 --> 00:09:25,164
That's a great gag.
203
00:09:26,165 --> 00:09:27,565
Oh...
204
00:09:28,670 --> 00:09:32,210
So this is what it feels like
not to bomb.
205
00:09:32,210 --> 00:09:33,410
Whoa!
206
00:09:33,413 --> 00:09:34,723
(exclaiming)
207
00:09:36,686 --> 00:09:38,356
No, you tricked me!
208
00:09:39,024 --> 00:09:41,664
You're nothing
but a bunch of losers.
209
00:09:41,663 --> 00:09:43,803
And that's all you'll ever be!
210
00:09:43,801 --> 00:09:45,541
-(gasps)
-(sighs)
211
00:09:45,538 --> 00:09:47,038
We're not dead.
212
00:09:47,040 --> 00:09:48,310
Somebody pinch me.
213
00:09:48,309 --> 00:09:49,549
Somebody slap me.
214
00:09:49,546 --> 00:09:51,846
A-Any one of youse.
Doesn't-doesn't matter.
215
00:09:51,850 --> 00:09:53,720
Guys, let's make a pact:
216
00:09:53,720 --> 00:09:55,890
if the clown comes back
in 27 years,
217
00:09:55,891 --> 00:09:57,231
no matter where we all end up,
218
00:09:57,227 --> 00:10:00,597
we'll come back home
and finish the job.
219
00:10:03,106 --> 00:10:05,806
Now let's find out
if this water is deep enough
220
00:10:05,811 --> 00:10:07,951
- for jumpin'!
-(whooping)
221
00:10:09,251 --> 00:10:10,621
Uh...
222
00:10:11,422 --> 00:10:12,422
- Mwah.
- Huh?
223
00:10:12,424 --> 00:10:14,094
I got your poem.
224
00:10:14,094 --> 00:10:18,604
I want my first love to be
the boy who wrote those words.
225
00:10:18,604 --> 00:10:21,414
B-By that, you mean me,
of course.
226
00:10:21,408 --> 00:10:23,908
Kiss me
for the rest of the summer.
227
00:10:25,851 --> 00:10:28,091
Wait, this isn't right.
228
00:10:28,089 --> 00:10:30,829
I'm the one I wanted Marge
to fall in love with.
229
00:10:30,828 --> 00:10:32,458
Eh, cheer up, Homer.
230
00:10:32,464 --> 00:10:34,574
We got our whole lives
ahead of us.
231
00:10:34,569 --> 00:10:36,369
Maybe you guys do.
232
00:10:36,372 --> 00:10:39,712
I think mine just ended.
233
00:10:39,712 --> 00:10:41,722
Oh, Marge.
Mwah, kissing.
234
00:10:41,716 --> 00:10:43,386
- This.
- I'm so happy.
235
00:10:43,386 --> 00:10:44,786
Oh yes.
(giggling)
236
00:10:51,536 --> 00:10:53,466
-(grunts)
- Hey,
237
00:10:53,472 --> 00:10:56,082
that bakery wasn't here
this morning.
238
00:10:56,847 --> 00:10:59,647
Well, there's no kids around.
239
00:10:59,652 --> 00:11:01,522
Might as well bully adults.
240
00:11:01,523 --> 00:11:03,933
Hey Pie Man!
Gimme a...
241
00:11:03,927 --> 00:11:05,397
(grunts)
242
00:11:05,396 --> 00:11:07,666
Dude, are you okay?
243
00:11:07,668 --> 00:11:09,398
(all screaming)
244
00:11:11,408 --> 00:11:13,648
♪
245
00:11:15,250 --> 00:11:16,520
(Lenny laughs)
246
00:11:16,520 --> 00:11:17,920
Oh, Moleman,
247
00:11:17,922 --> 00:11:20,592
I can't imagine my life
without you seated next to me
248
00:11:20,594 --> 00:11:23,274
every night
here at D'ohs Tavern.
249
00:11:23,266 --> 00:11:24,326
You're my best friend.
250
00:11:24,334 --> 00:11:26,314
I'm cold.
251
00:11:26,305 --> 00:11:27,575
(sighs)
252
00:11:27,575 --> 00:11:29,075
Hmm?
253
00:11:29,077 --> 00:11:31,577
One teen was killed
by a pie to the face.
254
00:11:31,583 --> 00:11:34,153
Another's intestines were
twisted into balloon animals.
255
00:11:34,154 --> 00:11:36,934
And the last, choked by a chain
of hankies so long,
256
00:11:36,927 --> 00:11:38,857
police are still pulling it out.
257
00:11:38,864 --> 00:11:41,374
No, the clown can't be back.
258
00:11:41,368 --> 00:11:43,138
Unless it's...
(gasps)
259
00:11:43,139 --> 00:11:45,609
27 years later.
260
00:11:45,611 --> 00:11:49,251
I got to tell the other Losers
that it's time to come home,
261
00:11:49,251 --> 00:11:50,961
so we can end this.
262
00:11:50,955 --> 00:11:55,495
I wonder if their lives
turned out as lousy as mine.
263
00:11:55,496 --> 00:11:59,836
♪ Here I am ♪
264
00:11:59,839 --> 00:12:02,879
♪ Rock you like a hurricane ♪
265
00:12:04,916 --> 00:12:06,546
♪ Here I am. ♪
266
00:12:06,553 --> 00:12:08,763
(cheering, applause)
267
00:12:10,861 --> 00:12:13,201
Thank you, Las Vegas.
268
00:12:13,199 --> 00:12:14,429
Yeah, rock and roll.
269
00:12:16,673 --> 00:12:18,083
Message for you
from your old hometown.
270
00:12:18,075 --> 00:12:21,345
Something about
a childhood pact.
271
00:12:21,348 --> 00:12:22,548
Ah...
272
00:12:22,551 --> 00:12:25,491
A pact is a pact.
I'm on my way.
273
00:12:25,490 --> 00:12:28,230
Uh, I got to go, guys.
274
00:12:28,229 --> 00:12:31,139
Oh, here's the instructions
for destroying the asteroid.
275
00:12:31,135 --> 00:12:32,565
You got this!
276
00:12:32,571 --> 00:12:34,271
ANNOUNCER:
Ten, nine...
277
00:12:34,274 --> 00:12:37,314
Homer, it's so nice
to hear your voice
278
00:12:37,314 --> 00:12:39,554
after all these years.
279
00:12:39,552 --> 00:12:42,192
Wow, CEO of your own company.
280
00:12:42,190 --> 00:12:45,730
You know, I pictured you growing
up to be a softball superstar.
281
00:12:45,731 --> 00:12:48,241
Aw, you were always so sweet.
282
00:12:48,235 --> 00:12:49,635
How have you been?
283
00:12:49,639 --> 00:12:52,509
So good.
I practically live on Reddit.
284
00:12:52,511 --> 00:12:54,311
But did you ever get the feeling
285
00:12:54,314 --> 00:12:57,254
that we missed our chance?
286
00:12:57,253 --> 00:12:58,893
I do.
I sure wish
287
00:12:58,890 --> 00:13:01,260
we'd done it 27 years ago.
288
00:13:01,261 --> 00:13:04,501
(gasps) Me too!
Oh, it's all I think about.
289
00:13:04,502 --> 00:13:06,812
Oh, you mean kill Krusto.
290
00:13:06,806 --> 00:13:08,706
Yeah, that would've
been good, too.
291
00:13:08,710 --> 00:13:12,020
Oh, I want to help,
but I'm not sure I can.
292
00:13:12,017 --> 00:13:14,587
I have responsibilities now.
293
00:13:14,589 --> 00:13:16,689
- Hi, Mom.
- What up, Big Blue?
294
00:13:16,693 --> 00:13:19,203
Bert, my little jazz tubist.
295
00:13:19,197 --> 00:13:21,997
And Lizzie,
my special little gal.
296
00:13:22,003 --> 00:13:25,983
Mom, I got an A-plus on my
Elizabeth Cady Stanton diorama.
297
00:13:25,978 --> 00:13:27,848
I threw a stink bomb
in the teacher's lounge
298
00:13:27,848 --> 00:13:29,148
and bike-locked the door.
299
00:13:29,151 --> 00:13:32,691
Well, I'm so proud
of one of those things.
300
00:13:32,692 --> 00:13:34,632
Who's Homer Simpson?
301
00:13:34,629 --> 00:13:36,529
That's a dumb-ass name.
302
00:13:36,533 --> 00:13:38,243
Really?
Our father's name is...
303
00:13:38,235 --> 00:13:39,935
Comic Book Guy.
304
00:13:39,939 --> 00:13:42,909
Homer Simpson is someone
we knew back in Kingfield.
305
00:13:42,912 --> 00:13:46,452
A town we will
never set foot in again.
306
00:13:46,452 --> 00:13:47,822
Mm...
307
00:13:47,822 --> 00:13:49,692
Homer needs us.
We're the only ones
308
00:13:49,692 --> 00:13:51,562
who can kill the clown.
309
00:13:51,563 --> 00:13:52,833
We're adults now.
310
00:13:52,832 --> 00:13:55,372
A kid murderer is a kid problem.
311
00:13:55,370 --> 00:13:58,980
What happened to the boy
who admired my bravery so much
312
00:13:58,977 --> 00:14:00,707
he put it in a poem?
313
00:14:00,714 --> 00:14:02,794
B-By that, you mean me,
of course.
314
00:14:02,785 --> 00:14:04,855
Well, I am a husband now,
and a father.
315
00:14:04,856 --> 00:14:06,686
And I'm-I'm...
316
00:14:06,693 --> 00:14:09,103
- I'm...
- The same little coward...
317
00:14:09,097 --> 00:14:11,397
You always were!
(roars)
318
00:14:12,203 --> 00:14:13,573
Aah!
319
00:14:13,573 --> 00:14:15,813
Marge, I had a dream
about him.
320
00:14:15,811 --> 00:14:17,721
He was just as scary
as I remember,
321
00:14:17,715 --> 00:14:20,345
but updated
for a Gen Z audience.
322
00:14:20,353 --> 00:14:22,263
Honey? Honey?
323
00:14:24,629 --> 00:14:26,029
(grumbles)
324
00:14:26,933 --> 00:14:28,403
To the Losers.
325
00:14:28,402 --> 00:14:30,372
The Losers.
326
00:14:30,373 --> 00:14:33,783
So, how the hell are we gonna
stop that unkillable clown?
327
00:14:33,780 --> 00:14:35,850
We ain't exactly children
no more.
328
00:14:35,851 --> 00:14:37,961
Yeah, but we're still friends.
329
00:14:37,955 --> 00:14:39,855
We're still
full of childlike wonder.
330
00:14:39,859 --> 00:14:41,629
We're still virgins.
331
00:14:41,629 --> 00:14:43,169
- Eesh.
- Mm...
332
00:14:43,165 --> 00:14:46,505
Yeah, we're still, uh...
(clears throat)
333
00:14:46,506 --> 00:14:50,146
Well, whenever
I need to find my courage,
334
00:14:50,146 --> 00:14:53,486
I think of a poem Comic Book Guy
wrote for me when we were kids.
335
00:14:53,486 --> 00:14:54,986
Poem?
336
00:14:54,989 --> 00:14:57,089
It's why
I fell in love with him.
337
00:14:57,828 --> 00:14:58,958
Marge, there's something
338
00:14:58,964 --> 00:15:01,204
I have to tell you right now,
339
00:15:01,201 --> 00:15:03,941
because if I wait
even one more second...
340
00:15:03,940 --> 00:15:08,050
I'm talking one single second,
just one...
341
00:15:08,048 --> 00:15:09,748
something might happen
that will make me not...
342
00:15:09,752 --> 00:15:11,822
-(door opens)
- BERT and LIZZIE: Mom!
343
00:15:11,823 --> 00:15:13,933
Oh... be able to tell you.
344
00:15:13,927 --> 00:15:17,027
Kids, no,
what are you doing here?
345
00:15:17,033 --> 00:15:19,003
They're here
to collect their mother.
346
00:15:19,004 --> 00:15:21,414
Kids, be good
and wait in the car.
347
00:15:21,408 --> 00:15:25,148
Mommy and Daddy have some
grown-up yelling to discuss.
348
00:15:25,951 --> 00:15:28,491
Mom and Dad's hometown
sure sucks.
349
00:15:28,489 --> 00:15:32,429
Misspelled pet cemetery,
Salem's parking lot,
350
00:15:32,430 --> 00:15:36,910
mysterious antique store
that charges by the soul.
351
00:15:36,906 --> 00:15:38,676
What the hell are you watching?
352
00:15:38,677 --> 00:15:40,207
Oh...
353
00:15:40,213 --> 00:15:43,353
Wake up!
We barely escaped last time.
354
00:15:43,352 --> 00:15:46,662
Why risk our lives now
when we have so much to lose?
355
00:15:46,659 --> 00:15:47,929
Present Homers excluded.
356
00:15:47,928 --> 00:15:49,358
(phones dinging, ringing)
357
00:15:50,466 --> 00:15:54,166
Hope you Losers weren't
thinking of leaving just yet.
358
00:15:54,174 --> 00:15:57,924
Not without seeing
my new star attraction.
359
00:15:57,915 --> 00:15:59,215
Help, Mom!
360
00:15:59,217 --> 00:16:02,417
Dad, get your fat ass
down here!
361
00:16:02,423 --> 00:16:03,433
No!
362
00:16:03,425 --> 00:16:05,455
(cackles)
363
00:16:08,269 --> 00:16:09,469
Our kids!
364
00:16:09,471 --> 00:16:10,741
Our phones.
365
00:16:10,741 --> 00:16:12,811
Now it's personal.
366
00:16:12,812 --> 00:16:16,422
Just like it always was.
367
00:16:17,655 --> 00:16:19,725
(grunts)
368
00:16:21,461 --> 00:16:24,541
(sniffs) I smell
thousand-year-old flop sweat.
369
00:16:24,535 --> 00:16:26,165
We must be close.
370
00:16:28,275 --> 00:16:30,005
- LIZZIE: Finally!
- BERT: Mom, Dad!
371
00:16:30,012 --> 00:16:31,082
- Up here!
-(gasps)
372
00:16:31,081 --> 00:16:33,951
Kids! Oh...
373
00:16:33,954 --> 00:16:35,224
Aah!
374
00:16:35,223 --> 00:16:38,833
Well, well.
If it isn't the Losers.
375
00:16:38,830 --> 00:16:42,240
Say hello to my studio audience.
376
00:16:43,005 --> 00:16:44,635
(children laughing)
377
00:16:49,952 --> 00:16:53,462
There's no laughter
like forced laughter.
378
00:16:53,459 --> 00:16:56,199
We're not afraid of you
anymore, clown.
379
00:16:56,198 --> 00:16:58,168
You have no power over us.
380
00:16:58,168 --> 00:17:01,238
He's an astronaut,
she's a seltzer big wig,
381
00:17:01,241 --> 00:17:03,351
and I'm a world-famous,
382
00:17:03,345 --> 00:17:05,945
um, virgin.
383
00:17:05,951 --> 00:17:07,251
Oh, damn it.
384
00:17:07,253 --> 00:17:10,663
The point is we've conquered
our childhood fears.
385
00:17:10,661 --> 00:17:14,901
Ah, but adults have something
much tastier than fears.
386
00:17:14,902 --> 00:17:16,142
Anxieties.
387
00:17:16,138 --> 00:17:18,208
Millions of tiny,
388
00:17:18,209 --> 00:17:20,979
delicious anxieties.
389
00:17:20,981 --> 00:17:22,451
(yelps)
390
00:17:22,450 --> 00:17:24,220
Oh!
391
00:17:25,524 --> 00:17:27,264
(screeching)
392
00:17:27,260 --> 00:17:28,860
You know what I'm thankful for?
393
00:17:28,863 --> 00:17:32,473
The filibuster.
Let's talk about it.
394
00:17:32,470 --> 00:17:33,510
ALL:
Aah!
395
00:17:33,506 --> 00:17:35,076
-(screeching)
-(all whimpering)
396
00:17:35,076 --> 00:17:37,616
But you... you've got something
397
00:17:37,615 --> 00:17:40,145
worth worrying about.
398
00:17:40,152 --> 00:17:42,062
Why don't I tell Marge
399
00:17:42,056 --> 00:17:44,086
you put your name on the poem
400
00:17:44,094 --> 00:17:46,474
that won her heart, eh?
401
00:17:47,467 --> 00:17:48,997
(yelps)
402
00:17:49,004 --> 00:17:51,114
No, no, please.
403
00:17:51,108 --> 00:17:53,048
It-it wasn't you?
404
00:17:53,045 --> 00:17:56,115
I tried to tell you,
just not very hard.
405
00:17:56,118 --> 00:17:58,388
My life is a lie.
406
00:17:58,389 --> 00:17:59,689
Oh...
407
00:18:02,698 --> 00:18:04,398
He must get his sinister powers
408
00:18:04,401 --> 00:18:06,611
from his captive audience.
409
00:18:06,606 --> 00:18:08,436
Just like Jimmy Fallon.
410
00:18:08,442 --> 00:18:11,452
You have to destroy the sign!
411
00:18:16,358 --> 00:18:18,258
Only you can do it, Marge.
412
00:18:18,262 --> 00:18:20,272
Your arm is summer lightning.
413
00:18:20,266 --> 00:18:22,096
Your bravery, the storm.
414
00:18:22,103 --> 00:18:24,273
You're the chimp in the zoo.
415
00:18:24,274 --> 00:18:27,254
And I'm still bananas for you.
416
00:18:27,246 --> 00:18:30,216
Now, throw, throw!
417
00:18:31,421 --> 00:18:32,961
Hmm?
418
00:18:32,958 --> 00:18:34,798
Ah...
419
00:18:34,795 --> 00:18:36,795
(grunting)
420
00:18:36,799 --> 00:18:38,839
(whimpering)
421
00:18:40,072 --> 00:18:41,882
(grunts)
422
00:18:43,078 --> 00:18:44,648
No!
423
00:18:48,322 --> 00:18:50,692
Why were we laughing?
424
00:18:50,694 --> 00:18:52,304
This show sucks.
425
00:18:52,296 --> 00:18:53,596
Let's go up to heaven
426
00:18:53,600 --> 00:18:56,370
and bask in the glory
of God's stupid love.
427
00:18:56,371 --> 00:18:58,411
♪
428
00:18:59,745 --> 00:19:01,445
My audience! No!
429
00:19:01,448 --> 00:19:03,788
It took me years to grow them.
430
00:19:03,787 --> 00:19:05,657
(groans)
Eh?
431
00:19:05,657 --> 00:19:08,157
Aah! Oh... Oh!
432
00:19:08,162 --> 00:19:10,772
I can't start over! Oh!
433
00:19:10,767 --> 00:19:12,097
What would that even look like?
434
00:19:12,103 --> 00:19:14,113
(whimpers)
435
00:19:14,107 --> 00:19:16,507
Dancing for followers on TikTok?
436
00:19:16,512 --> 00:19:17,452
(groans)
437
00:19:17,447 --> 00:19:20,447
I haven't written a joke
since 1647.
438
00:19:21,488 --> 00:19:23,428
Aah!
And that material has not...
439
00:19:23,425 --> 00:19:25,625
(exclaiming, grunting):
aged...
440
00:19:25,630 --> 00:19:27,800
well. Oh...
441
00:19:27,801 --> 00:19:30,671
I blame cancel culture.
442
00:19:33,112 --> 00:19:35,782
You were finally brave.
443
00:19:35,784 --> 00:19:39,594
Does this make up for
lying to you all these years?
444
00:19:39,592 --> 00:19:41,162
Oh, honey.
445
00:19:41,161 --> 00:19:42,971
Of course not.
446
00:19:42,965 --> 00:19:44,635
No, I get it. (groans)
447
00:19:46,204 --> 00:19:47,914
HOMER:
Mm...
448
00:19:48,943 --> 00:19:50,513
Growing up isn't easy.
449
00:19:50,514 --> 00:19:53,194
The traumas we lived as kids
can haunt us forever,
450
00:19:53,185 --> 00:19:55,855
lurking in the corners
of our mind.
451
00:19:55,857 --> 00:19:57,287
We can't undo the harm,
452
00:19:57,293 --> 00:19:59,703
but with a little help,
we can survive it.
453
00:19:59,698 --> 00:20:04,208
And live the life
we were always meant to.
454
00:20:05,777 --> 00:20:08,947
The humans have vanquished
our thousand-year-old clown,
455
00:20:08,950 --> 00:20:12,460
but surely they will be no match
for our next nightmare...
456
00:20:12,457 --> 00:20:15,527
a Saint Bernard with rabies.
457
00:20:15,530 --> 00:20:16,930
Mm...
458
00:20:16,933 --> 00:20:18,443
An angry car?
459
00:20:18,435 --> 00:20:21,575
Put that in the "maybe" pile.
460
00:20:21,576 --> 00:20:24,816
How about a prom
that goes seriously wrong?
461
00:20:25,817 --> 00:20:27,387
Haunted hotel?
462
00:20:27,386 --> 00:20:29,086
What about some Tommyknockers?
463
00:20:29,090 --> 00:20:30,960
Those sound scary.
464
00:20:30,961 --> 00:20:33,531
Yes, yes!
465
00:20:33,533 --> 00:20:36,073
(cackling)
466
00:20:36,071 --> 00:20:39,241
- Tommyknockers.
- Tommyknockers.
467
00:20:39,244 --> 00:20:41,284
(cackling continues)
468
00:20:41,281 --> 00:20:44,761
- Tommyknockers.
- Tommyknockers.
469
00:20:51,536 --> 00:20:54,506
Captioning sponsored by
20th CENTURY FOX TELEVISION
470
00:20:54,508 --> 00:20:57,708
and FOX BROADCASTING COMPANY
471
00:20:57,714 --> 00:21:00,494
and TOYOTA.
472
00:21:00,486 --> 00:21:03,726
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org
473
00:21:31,081 --> 00:21:33,321
(shrieks)31081
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