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1
00:00:08,500 --> 00:00:11,320
Don't rot your brain
on Satan's calculator.
2
00:00:11,333 --> 00:00:14,231
Babies need real toys like these.
3
00:00:22,145 --> 00:00:23,197
It's Princess Maggie.
4
00:00:24,215 --> 00:00:26,461
Princess Maggie's here.
5
00:00:26,548 --> 00:00:28,245
Princess Maggie, what's wrong?
6
00:00:28,332 --> 00:00:30,160
The girl is bored.
7
00:00:30,291 --> 00:00:32,902
Royal court,
entertain my daughter at once.
8
00:00:32,989 --> 00:00:36,079
No princess can frown when
her eardrums are pulsing
9
00:00:36,210 --> 00:00:38,690
with the beat of iambic pentameter.
10
00:00:40,040 --> 00:00:41,476
That's quite a frown.
11
00:00:41,563 --> 00:00:43,173
Out of my way!
12
00:00:43,304 --> 00:00:46,263
I've got no shame or regard
for my own well-being.
13
00:00:47,569 --> 00:00:48,570
Hey, hey!
14
00:00:50,354 --> 00:00:52,704
You fools have failed the princess.
15
00:00:52,791 --> 00:00:55,142
We have no other option.
We must give her...
16
00:00:55,272 --> 00:00:57,492
the special gift.
17
00:01:15,118 --> 00:01:18,252
Goodbye, Princess Maggie. Goodbye.
18
00:01:24,388 --> 00:01:25,389
¡Ay, caramba!
19
00:01:29,350 --> 00:01:30,351
Oh, boy.
20
00:01:30,481 --> 00:01:31,613
Homer, your father's
21
00:01:31,787 --> 00:01:33,832
messing up the baby again.
22
00:01:54,201 --> 00:01:55,985
_
23
00:01:56,456 --> 00:01:57,486
_
24
00:01:59,623 --> 00:02:02,162
_
25
00:02:15,571 --> 00:02:17,423
_
26
00:02:17,424 --> 00:02:19,961
_
27
00:02:20,057 --> 00:02:22,403
Way ahead of you, pal.
28
00:02:37,331 --> 00:02:38,358
My eyes...
29
00:02:40,856 --> 00:02:43,533
_
30
00:02:43,938 --> 00:02:45,945
_
31
00:02:45,946 --> 00:02:49,301
_
32
00:02:55,479 --> 00:02:57,916
Where did all this traffic come from?
33
00:02:58,047 --> 00:03:00,397
It's like my favorite movie ever,
Cars 3.
34
00:03:00,484 --> 00:03:02,486
I hated Cars 1 and 2.
35
00:03:08,457 --> 00:03:10,451
I'm unsupervised.
36
00:03:10,581 --> 00:03:11,887
Have no fear.
37
00:03:12,017 --> 00:03:13,932
Safety is here.
38
00:03:14,063 --> 00:03:16,457
Traffic, no traffic...
what's the difference?
39
00:03:16,587 --> 00:03:19,503
I got nothing to be late
for and no one who cares.
40
00:03:21,419 --> 00:03:25,348
_
41
00:03:32,882 --> 00:03:36,799
Let's take this from Disney+ to HBO Max.
42
00:03:42,196 --> 00:03:43,980
Oh, Marge, you haven't honked
43
00:03:44,111 --> 00:03:45,416
like this since high school.
44
00:03:45,547 --> 00:03:47,462
It's a traffic jam.
45
00:03:53,903 --> 00:03:57,211
My, my, look at all those middle
fingers raised to the Lord.
46
00:03:58,951 --> 00:04:01,432
Wait a minute. That car looks familiar.
47
00:04:01,563 --> 00:04:03,434
Hey, that looks like...
48
00:04:06,350 --> 00:04:08,222
No, don't go there, Moe. Don't go there.
49
00:04:08,352 --> 00:04:09,788
Erase, erase, erase!
50
00:04:12,313 --> 00:04:13,520
_
51
00:04:14,043 --> 00:04:15,170
_
52
00:04:15,745 --> 00:04:16,924
_
53
00:04:18,400 --> 00:04:19,570
_
54
00:04:20,705 --> 00:04:21,965
_
55
00:04:23,993 --> 00:04:25,299
_
56
00:04:25,719 --> 00:04:26,892
Oh, come on.
57
00:04:27,023 --> 00:04:28,720
We put up a sign and everything.
58
00:04:28,851 --> 00:04:30,592
This is so unreal.
59
00:04:30,766 --> 00:04:33,682
Why did all this traffic
suddenly appear on our street?
60
00:04:33,812 --> 00:04:35,901
Wayz told me this was the fastest route.
61
00:04:36,032 --> 00:04:38,295
That's important when
you're selling your organs.
62
00:04:38,382 --> 00:04:39,949
Oh, my God, I've heard of this.
63
00:04:40,036 --> 00:04:41,342
That app routes traffic
64
00:04:41,472 --> 00:04:43,257
through a quiet
residential neighborhood,
65
00:04:43,431 --> 00:04:45,694
turning it into a gridlocked nightmare.
66
00:04:46,956 --> 00:04:49,480
♪ Damn this traffic jam ♪
67
00:04:49,654 --> 00:04:52,004
♪ How I hate to be late,
it hurts my motor... ♪
68
00:04:52,135 --> 00:04:55,138
Sorry, I met someone in another car.
69
00:04:55,269 --> 00:04:57,836
♪ Time I get home,
my supper will be cold ♪
70
00:04:57,967 --> 00:04:59,838
♪ Damn this traffic jam ♪
71
00:05:01,579 --> 00:05:03,625
♪ Well, I left my job
about five o'clock ♪
72
00:05:03,799 --> 00:05:05,757
- ♪ It took 15 minutes to go three blocks... ♪
- _
73
00:05:05,931 --> 00:05:07,759
- _
- We need to do something.
74
00:05:07,846 --> 00:05:10,022
This is driving the neighborhood nuts.
75
00:05:10,153 --> 00:05:12,416
Even the guy who's
always in his underwear.
76
00:05:12,547 --> 00:05:14,288
This is more than I put on for Zoom.
77
00:05:14,418 --> 00:05:16,377
Enough with the traffic.
78
00:05:16,507 --> 00:05:18,205
I'm calling a neighborhood meeting.
79
00:05:20,250 --> 00:05:21,556
Neighborhood Meeting.
80
00:05:21,643 --> 00:05:23,171
Neighborhood meeting.
81
00:05:23,195 --> 00:05:27,039
Please rate my app. Please rate my app.
82
00:05:27,170 --> 00:05:29,912
Two stars? My IPO is ruined.
83
00:05:29,999 --> 00:05:32,436
Ruined! Ruined!
84
00:05:35,091 --> 00:05:36,527
We're here to talk about
85
00:05:36,658 --> 00:05:39,791
the terrible problem on our street.
86
00:05:39,878 --> 00:05:41,793
- Finally.
- About time.
87
00:05:41,880 --> 00:05:45,797
We assume you're talking
about you, the Simpsons.
88
00:05:45,884 --> 00:05:47,016
Wha...?
89
00:05:47,103 --> 00:05:48,670
I've seen the boy's moons more times
90
00:05:48,844 --> 00:05:50,889
than I've seen the real one,
and I'm an astronomer.
91
00:05:51,063 --> 00:05:52,543
What's wrong with us?
92
00:05:52,674 --> 00:05:55,546
You haven't stopped by
to say hello in 25 years,
93
00:05:55,677 --> 00:05:57,418
and I live next door.
94
00:05:57,548 --> 00:06:00,595
The only good one's the baby,
and she shot a guy.
95
00:06:02,336 --> 00:06:03,989
Wait, are we ignoring
the elephant in the room?
96
00:06:04,120 --> 00:06:06,253
By which I mean the big, fat husband.
97
00:06:06,340 --> 00:06:08,342
Every time Homer wears corduroys,
98
00:06:08,472 --> 00:06:11,388
I just hear those thighs scraping,
scraping, scraping.
99
00:06:11,475 --> 00:06:14,217
Oh, my God. I'm starting to get the idea
100
00:06:14,348 --> 00:06:16,350
you think we're not good neighbors.
101
00:06:18,917 --> 00:06:20,049
You see? You see?
102
00:06:20,223 --> 00:06:21,920
Now, don't worry, my friends.
103
00:06:22,051 --> 00:06:24,532
I'm stepping forward
to fix this traffic.
104
00:06:24,662 --> 00:06:27,404
And by doing so, maybe...
just maybe I'll fix
105
00:06:27,491 --> 00:06:29,885
my reputation with you all.
106
00:06:30,015 --> 00:06:34,585
So just say to me what I say
to Tinker Bell: "I believe."
107
00:06:36,500 --> 00:06:38,850
And... off I go.
108
00:06:41,142 --> 00:06:43,358
_
109
00:06:44,639 --> 00:06:47,076
Um... no.
110
00:06:48,077 --> 00:06:49,470
"Identify all traffic lights."
111
00:06:49,600 --> 00:06:50,645
Done.
112
00:06:50,732 --> 00:06:52,081
"Identify all yield signs."
113
00:06:52,255 --> 00:06:53,430
Done.
114
00:06:53,517 --> 00:06:55,084
"Identify all the crosswalks."
115
00:06:55,258 --> 00:06:58,609
Oh! Lisa, help me.
116
00:06:58,740 --> 00:06:59,958
Done.
117
00:07:00,089 --> 00:07:01,699
"Identify all fire hydrants."
118
00:07:01,830 --> 00:07:02,837
Done.
119
00:07:02,874 --> 00:07:04,180
Jesuits? Done.
120
00:07:04,311 --> 00:07:05,877
20th-century dictators?
121
00:07:06,008 --> 00:07:08,358
Uh, overrated fiction?
122
00:07:08,587 --> 00:07:11,013
Hyperintelligent cartoon characters?
123
00:07:11,100 --> 00:07:12,884
Vegan nut milks?
124
00:07:13,015 --> 00:07:14,973
Future criminals?
125
00:07:15,147 --> 00:07:17,062
Aah! New England doorways!
126
00:07:17,193 --> 00:07:19,413
Oh, forget this. I'm calling instead.
127
00:07:19,587 --> 00:07:21,632
You've reached Wayz customer service.
128
00:07:21,763 --> 00:07:25,549
You have 5,700 callers ahead of you.
129
00:07:25,636 --> 00:07:28,944
Now, please enjoy the frustrated
noises of other callers on hold.
130
00:07:31,120 --> 00:07:32,556
I'm gonna blow my brains out.
131
00:07:36,097 --> 00:07:37,126
You again?
132
00:07:38,912 --> 00:07:41,783
Can it be her, after all these years?
133
00:07:41,870 --> 00:07:45,352
The woman I thought was the
one stuck behind my car?
134
00:07:49,138 --> 00:07:52,272
♪ Mmm, mmm ♪
135
00:07:54,230 --> 00:07:58,582
♪ Mmm-mmm-mmm, mmm-mmm-mmm... ♪
136
00:08:00,732 --> 00:08:02,369
Hi, Moe. I missed you.
137
00:08:02,499 --> 00:08:04,240
I never should've left.
138
00:08:04,371 --> 00:08:07,330
Maya. The longest,
best relationship of my life.
139
00:08:07,461 --> 00:08:10,290
That was a great six days.
140
00:08:11,291 --> 00:08:13,641
You're a good kisser.
141
00:08:13,771 --> 00:08:16,165
Yeah. I practice by siphoning gas
142
00:08:16,252 --> 00:08:18,123
out of other people's tanks.
143
00:08:18,254 --> 00:08:21,301
So, is there a knob or an
"open sesame" type deal or what?
144
00:08:21,388 --> 00:08:23,172
My house is over there.
145
00:08:23,303 --> 00:08:24,303
Wha...?
146
00:08:28,830 --> 00:08:31,659
Every day since you left me,
I've written you a letter.
147
00:08:33,574 --> 00:08:35,583
Really wish I had gotten your address.
148
00:08:42,409 --> 00:08:44,193
So, how you been, Maya?
149
00:08:44,280 --> 00:08:46,500
Well, I finally got my PhD.
150
00:08:46,630 --> 00:08:48,371
Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.
151
00:08:48,502 --> 00:08:49,981
You taking medicine for that or what?
152
00:08:50,112 --> 00:08:51,635
Oh, Moe.
153
00:08:51,766 --> 00:08:54,203
It's nice to laugh again. How are you?
154
00:08:54,290 --> 00:08:55,987
Oh, I-I'm doing great.
155
00:08:56,074 --> 00:08:58,163
Yeah, the factory closed,
so there's lots of new drunks.
156
00:08:58,294 --> 00:09:00,209
And, uh, oh, the bathroom possum
157
00:09:00,296 --> 00:09:02,559
is getting real good at
handing out them combs.
158
00:09:07,888 --> 00:09:10,611
Who am I kidding?
My life is a wreck, Maya.
159
00:09:10,741 --> 00:09:13,570
The face recognition software
on my phone says, "Yuck."
160
00:09:13,657 --> 00:09:16,443
My playlist only has breakup songs.
161
00:09:16,530 --> 00:09:18,619
It's rough, I'm telling you, yeah.
162
00:09:18,749 --> 00:09:21,752
I miss you, Moses Marie Szyslak.
163
00:09:21,926 --> 00:09:24,102
Oh, no, no, no.
Please don't give me that look.
164
00:09:24,276 --> 00:09:26,931
I can't go through it again, Maya.
I can't.
165
00:09:27,062 --> 00:09:29,804
Ah, just look at you walking
toward me, coming closer,
166
00:09:29,891 --> 00:09:31,762
with those big green eyes of yours
167
00:09:31,893 --> 00:09:33,373
and the great-smelling hair,
168
00:09:33,460 --> 00:09:36,245
skin smoother than American cheese.
169
00:09:39,657 --> 00:09:40,857
_
170
00:09:40,858 --> 00:09:43,383
But I want a drink now.
171
00:09:49,127 --> 00:09:52,783
Oh, I wish this moment could
last forever, like, uh...
172
00:09:52,914 --> 00:09:55,656
uh, I don't know, uh,
Henry Winkler's career.
173
00:09:55,786 --> 00:09:57,658
Boy, that guy never jumped the shark.
174
00:09:57,788 --> 00:09:59,790
Not even when he jumped the shark.
175
00:09:59,964 --> 00:10:03,054
Just so I know, have you had
another girlfriend since me?
176
00:10:03,228 --> 00:10:05,056
Uh, not really, no.
177
00:10:05,143 --> 00:10:06,493
Uh, no one could match you.
178
00:10:06,667 --> 00:10:09,017
I mean,
I have been catfished a few times.
179
00:10:09,147 --> 00:10:10,584
Hey, Moe.
180
00:10:10,714 --> 00:10:13,021
It's us, "Online Gloria."
181
00:10:13,151 --> 00:10:15,284
I'll kill you! Also, I love you.
182
00:10:18,069 --> 00:10:20,463
Oh, Moe, you poor guy.
183
00:10:21,508 --> 00:10:23,727
Oh, everything is perfect.
184
00:10:23,814 --> 00:10:27,252
Which it always is until I say,
"I love you."
185
00:10:29,864 --> 00:10:31,779
I love you.
186
00:10:32,600 --> 00:10:33,963
_
187
00:10:35,174 --> 00:10:37,194
_
188
00:10:37,741 --> 00:10:39,874
I love you.
Will you marry me?
189
00:10:44,313 --> 00:10:46,228
_
190
00:10:46,315 --> 00:10:47,534
To hell with women.
191
00:10:47,664 --> 00:10:49,579
I love you, New York.
192
00:10:51,407 --> 00:10:53,540
Help me. Spider-Man!
193
00:11:00,290 --> 00:11:02,723
Professor, can you get
the traffic off our street?
194
00:11:02,853 --> 00:11:04,376
I'll give you anything except for money
195
00:11:04,507 --> 00:11:05,900
or credit for what you did.
196
00:11:05,987 --> 00:11:09,425
The only way to defeat
a global data behemoth
197
00:11:09,556 --> 00:11:11,993
is to get into the source code.
198
00:11:12,167 --> 00:11:14,996
Just look what I did here on, uh...
on the Wikipedia.
199
00:11:18,652 --> 00:11:21,176
Welcome to Wayz.
200
00:11:21,306 --> 00:11:24,222
We figure out the fastest route
to get you where you want to go.
201
00:11:24,353 --> 00:11:26,703
Our secret? Always collecting data.
202
00:11:26,790 --> 00:11:28,836
But we would never misuse it.
203
00:11:28,966 --> 00:11:30,402
Who do you think we are, Google?
204
00:11:30,533 --> 00:11:32,143
Disclaimer: We're owned by Google.
205
00:11:32,274 --> 00:11:33,971
I've got the answer. What if
206
00:11:34,102 --> 00:11:36,757
we made your street...
207
00:11:36,887 --> 00:11:38,236
...not exist?
208
00:11:38,410 --> 00:11:40,151
Well, where would we live?
209
00:11:40,238 --> 00:11:41,979
Well, that's quite silly.
210
00:11:42,110 --> 00:11:45,026
It would, of course,
still exist in real life,
211
00:11:45,200 --> 00:11:47,768
but I could make it
disappear from the database.
212
00:11:49,813 --> 00:11:51,554
All right, let us see here.
213
00:11:51,685 --> 00:11:53,774
Uh, keystrokes, keystrokes, escape key,
214
00:11:53,904 --> 00:11:56,907
both colon and semicolon,
backslash, backslash,
215
00:11:57,038 --> 00:12:00,581
ampersand...
216
00:12:00,589 --> 00:12:03,348
we come to a new day on
"no such street."
217
00:12:09,833 --> 00:12:13,271
Never again will we be afraid of cars.
218
00:12:13,445 --> 00:12:16,013
Get thee out of my way, English!
219
00:12:16,144 --> 00:12:19,190
It's time to play in the streets!
220
00:12:20,191 --> 00:12:21,628
Haw-haw!
221
00:12:28,908 --> 00:12:31,115
Climate change is real.
222
00:12:35,816 --> 00:12:37,600
They know I did this. They're making
223
00:12:37,731 --> 00:12:40,037
eye contact with me. Eye contact.
224
00:12:40,168 --> 00:12:42,736
Even the guy with the
boat in his driveway.
225
00:12:42,910 --> 00:12:44,999
Hey, hey, Homer,
want to come on my boat with me?
226
00:12:45,173 --> 00:12:47,436
- In the water?
- Eh, we'll see.
227
00:12:47,523 --> 00:12:48,537
Uh, one step at a time.
228
00:12:48,611 --> 00:12:50,395
I will never get tired of this.
229
00:12:50,526 --> 00:12:52,833
Never. Never, ever.
230
00:12:53,877 --> 00:12:56,097
So, what do you feel like doing?
231
00:12:56,271 --> 00:12:58,447
I don't know, I... I feel like singing.
232
00:12:58,578 --> 00:13:01,015
♪ You're bringing me sunshine ♪
233
00:13:01,102 --> 00:13:02,886
♪ Moe ♪
234
00:13:03,017 --> 00:13:05,410
♪ It's like vodka with fresh lime ♪
235
00:13:05,541 --> 00:13:07,543
♪ Let it flow ♪
236
00:13:07,717 --> 00:13:09,850
♪ I'm having a fun time ♪
237
00:13:09,980 --> 00:13:11,895
♪ Whoa ♪
238
00:13:12,026 --> 00:13:14,071
♪ Serving up red wine ♪
239
00:13:14,202 --> 00:13:15,986
♪ Pinot ♪
240
00:13:16,117 --> 00:13:17,901
♪ I drink more than I should ♪
241
00:13:18,032 --> 00:13:20,251
♪ Don't it, don't it,
don't it, don't it ♪
242
00:13:20,338 --> 00:13:22,123
♪ Don't it, don't it feel good. ♪
243
00:13:23,472 --> 00:13:25,561
Hey, are you guys an item again?
244
00:13:26,014 --> 00:13:28,216
Well, maybe, maybe.
245
00:13:28,346 --> 00:13:29,783
We definitely are.
246
00:13:29,913 --> 00:13:31,785
He has a toothbrush at my place.
247
00:13:31,915 --> 00:13:33,743
Yeah, but, yeah, it's a rental.
248
00:13:33,874 --> 00:13:36,528
Moe's the best thing
that's ever happened to me.
249
00:13:36,659 --> 00:13:38,922
And this time, it's gonna last.
250
00:13:39,053 --> 00:13:40,924
Way to go, Moe. Three cheers.
251
00:13:41,098 --> 00:13:42,491
Hip, hip, hooray!
252
00:13:42,665 --> 00:13:44,928
Hip, hip, hooray! Hip, hip...
253
00:13:45,059 --> 00:13:47,365
Homer, come in the alley with me.
254
00:13:47,622 --> 00:13:50,151
My doctor warned me not
to cut off a "hip, hip, hooray."
255
00:13:52,327 --> 00:13:54,068
Look, Maya left me once.
256
00:13:54,155 --> 00:13:55,896
I just know she's gonna leave me again.
257
00:13:56,026 --> 00:13:57,628
This-this is a disaster.
258
00:13:57,702 --> 00:14:00,401
You're the only guy here who
knows how to hold on to a woman.
259
00:14:00,463 --> 00:14:03,164
What is your secret?
How do you keep Midge?
260
00:14:03,338 --> 00:14:05,253
Well, it's, uh... it's, um...
261
00:14:05,383 --> 00:14:06,733
Hmm.
262
00:14:06,863 --> 00:14:08,517
It helps if you get them pregnant.
263
00:14:08,604 --> 00:14:11,259
Please, I need some actual,
real advice here.
264
00:14:11,389 --> 00:14:13,000
Yeah, I better call Midge.
265
00:14:13,087 --> 00:14:14,479
Hello.
266
00:14:14,610 --> 00:14:16,090
Honey, I'm here in the alley with Moe.
267
00:14:16,177 --> 00:14:17,744
The only woman who ever
loved him came back,
268
00:14:17,918 --> 00:14:19,484
and he's afraid she's
gonna leave him again.
269
00:14:19,615 --> 00:14:20,747
What should he do?
270
00:14:20,921 --> 00:14:22,531
Hand him the phone.
271
00:14:22,705 --> 00:14:24,881
Moe, trust love.
272
00:14:24,968 --> 00:14:26,187
Gotcha.
273
00:14:26,361 --> 00:14:27,449
Your wife's an idiot.
274
00:14:27,536 --> 00:14:29,146
Another tray of doughnuts.
275
00:14:29,277 --> 00:14:30,974
This time from that family over there.
276
00:14:31,148 --> 00:14:33,498
Geez, I can't take all this adulation.
277
00:14:33,629 --> 00:14:35,762
This must be what drove
Randy Quaid crazy.
278
00:14:35,849 --> 00:14:37,328
Mr. Simpson, will you throw out
279
00:14:37,415 --> 00:14:39,156
the first pitch at my
Little League game?
280
00:14:39,287 --> 00:14:41,419
Want to have coffee on my
boat in the parking lot?
281
00:14:41,593 --> 00:14:42,986
Do you ever take it in the water?
282
00:14:43,160 --> 00:14:44,292
Not yet.
283
00:14:44,422 --> 00:14:46,207
Please, I'm just here to eat.
284
00:14:46,381 --> 00:14:47,991
Geez, you were mad they didn't like you,
285
00:14:48,122 --> 00:14:49,993
and now you're mad they like you.
286
00:14:50,080 --> 00:14:52,474
I just want to be left
alone with my to-do list.
287
00:14:52,561 --> 00:14:53,997
Excuse me.
288
00:14:54,128 --> 00:14:55,956
Will you be godfather to my baby?
289
00:14:56,086 --> 00:14:57,305
Let me see it.
290
00:14:57,435 --> 00:14:59,350
Ugh. Pass.
291
00:14:59,437 --> 00:15:02,005
Okay, Moe. I'll be back in 20 minutes.
292
00:15:02,179 --> 00:15:03,703
I'm just getting some stuff for dinner.
293
00:15:03,790 --> 00:15:05,574
- Love you.
- Mwah.
294
00:15:05,705 --> 00:15:07,489
Love you, too.
295
00:15:07,576 --> 00:15:10,057
Moe. Oh, Moe.
296
00:15:10,144 --> 00:15:12,450
Huh?
297
00:15:12,581 --> 00:15:14,539
Look at you. Look at us.
298
00:15:14,670 --> 00:15:16,672
She's not gonna come back.
299
00:15:16,803 --> 00:15:19,153
- They never come back.
- Oh, yeah?
300
00:15:19,240 --> 00:15:21,329
Well, this time,
I'm not gonna listen to mirrors
301
00:15:21,459 --> 00:15:22,896
or mud puddles
302
00:15:23,026 --> 00:15:25,376
or my upside-down face in a spoon.
303
00:15:25,463 --> 00:15:27,509
This time, I'm gonna believe.
304
00:15:27,596 --> 00:15:29,380
Oh, no, you're not.
305
00:15:30,642 --> 00:15:32,383
No one could love you.
306
00:15:32,470 --> 00:15:34,081
Stop it, stop it, stop it!
307
00:15:34,211 --> 00:15:35,735
What does it take to
get a beer around here?
308
00:15:35,822 --> 00:15:37,040
Shut up!
309
00:15:37,171 --> 00:15:39,260
Shut up? I would stop coming here
310
00:15:39,434 --> 00:15:41,349
if you weren't the only
place in stumbling distance.
311
00:15:41,479 --> 00:15:43,046
You are not real.
312
00:15:43,133 --> 00:15:44,961
You're just that nagging
voice of self-doubt
313
00:15:45,048 --> 00:15:46,571
that lives in my head.
314
00:15:46,702 --> 00:15:48,791
That's right. Easy in, easy out.
315
00:15:48,922 --> 00:15:50,445
Well, this time, I'm gonna stop you
316
00:15:50,575 --> 00:15:52,534
before you wreck my life.
317
00:15:55,102 --> 00:15:57,800
Now you're a loser with
seven years bad luck.
318
00:16:01,238 --> 00:16:03,240
♪ No one likes you ♪
319
00:16:03,371 --> 00:16:05,286
♪ You're the worst ♪
320
00:16:05,373 --> 00:16:08,419
♪ We'd all be happy if
your head just burst ♪
321
00:16:08,506 --> 00:16:11,683
♪ The world could
not hate you more ♪
322
00:16:11,814 --> 00:16:16,732
♪ You lousy, oozing canker sore ♪
323
00:16:16,863 --> 00:16:18,865
I guess what we're trying to say is...
324
00:16:19,039 --> 00:16:22,390
♪ You'll die alone. ♪
325
00:16:22,520 --> 00:16:23,695
You're right.
326
00:16:23,826 --> 00:16:25,088
You beautiful bastards are right.
327
00:16:29,492 --> 00:16:30,790
- Mm-hmm.
- Ah, yeah.
328
00:16:34,358 --> 00:16:36,099
Huh? What the...?
329
00:16:36,230 --> 00:16:38,449
Moe? You're hiding here?
330
00:16:38,536 --> 00:16:41,017
Yeah. Bart's treehouse is the one place
331
00:16:41,104 --> 00:16:42,845
no one will look for me.
332
00:16:42,976 --> 00:16:44,412
Plus, there are no girls allowed,
333
00:16:44,542 --> 00:16:46,718
which, uh, helps.
334
00:16:46,849 --> 00:16:48,677
Moe's going through a tough time, son.
335
00:16:48,764 --> 00:16:49,983
Just play around him.
336
00:16:50,113 --> 00:16:51,767
We'll just pretend he's a dead,
rotting alien.
337
00:16:51,898 --> 00:16:53,116
Thank you, son.
338
00:16:57,773 --> 00:16:59,775
The alien's alive!
339
00:16:59,906 --> 00:17:01,777
- And it has feelings.
- Kill him!
340
00:17:11,043 --> 00:17:12,867
I'm sorry, no breakfast
341
00:17:12,937 --> 00:17:15,051
until you get Moe out of the treehouse.
342
00:17:16,723 --> 00:17:19,055
And I'll keep your bacon
safe while you're gone.
343
00:17:20,796 --> 00:17:23,146
Thank God I have my pocket bacon.
344
00:17:24,713 --> 00:17:27,759
Moe, you can't stay here anymore.
345
00:17:27,890 --> 00:17:30,153
Sure, I can.
Uh, you want some eggs with that?
346
00:17:30,240 --> 00:17:31,938
I got 'em out of that nest over there.
347
00:17:32,068 --> 00:17:33,374
Just one.
348
00:17:33,548 --> 00:17:35,289
I don't want to be rude.
349
00:17:35,376 --> 00:17:37,508
Listen, Moe, every once in a while,
350
00:17:37,595 --> 00:17:40,947
a beautiful woman falls in love
with a homely guy like us.
351
00:17:41,034 --> 00:17:42,687
You got to make the most of it.
352
00:17:42,818 --> 00:17:46,039
If Kevin James can find happiness,
why can't you?
353
00:17:46,169 --> 00:17:48,345
And he was always wearing shorts.
354
00:17:48,476 --> 00:17:50,957
You know, after all these years,
I dated all these women,
355
00:17:51,131 --> 00:17:53,611
and it always just goes
back to square one.
356
00:17:53,742 --> 00:17:55,613
Lonely old Moe.
357
00:17:55,744 --> 00:17:57,485
Well, there is a way around that.
358
00:17:57,615 --> 00:17:58,965
You could propose.
359
00:17:59,095 --> 00:18:00,923
Wha...?
360
00:18:01,054 --> 00:18:03,752
What are you proposing I propose?
361
00:18:03,883 --> 00:18:06,307
I mean the big "M."
362
00:18:06,337 --> 00:18:08,209
- Murder-suicide?
- No.
363
00:18:08,339 --> 00:18:10,733
- Marriage.
- Marriage? Whoa.
364
00:18:10,864 --> 00:18:12,517
You mean I could have
the thing you're always
365
00:18:12,648 --> 00:18:14,694
coming into my bar and moaning about?
366
00:18:16,783 --> 00:18:18,349
You know what? She's worth it.
367
00:18:18,480 --> 00:18:20,134
I'll give it a shot.
368
00:18:22,250 --> 00:18:24,791
Okay. This is as far as we go.
369
00:18:24,965 --> 00:18:26,662
Yeah, yeah, okay.
370
00:18:26,836 --> 00:18:28,229
Let me just straighten myself up.
371
00:18:45,463 --> 00:18:48,205
You'd better speak fast,
or for the second time,
372
00:18:48,336 --> 00:18:50,033
you're gonna lose the first good thing
373
00:18:50,207 --> 00:18:51,687
that's ever happened to you.
374
00:18:51,861 --> 00:18:53,602
I'm so sorry. You're great, so great,
375
00:18:53,689 --> 00:18:55,300
and all I've been is afraid.
376
00:18:58,041 --> 00:19:00,478
But all I got to do
is look in your eyes.
377
00:19:00,652 --> 00:19:02,567
Baby, I love you so much.
378
00:19:02,698 --> 00:19:05,222
You stick with me,
you'll get everything you ever wanted.
379
00:19:05,353 --> 00:19:07,050
I will never doubt you again.
380
00:19:07,181 --> 00:19:08,617
You can control the remote.
381
00:19:08,748 --> 00:19:10,924
You can pick all our vacations.
382
00:19:11,054 --> 00:19:13,535
And because I know
the ladies like it this way,
383
00:19:13,622 --> 00:19:16,233
I will leave the toilet seat on.
384
00:19:16,364 --> 00:19:19,062
Maya, will you marry me?
385
00:19:23,719 --> 00:19:25,155
Forget it, loser.
386
00:19:25,286 --> 00:19:27,418
Gorillas like us don't get the girl.
387
00:19:27,505 --> 00:19:30,552
We're lucky if our cage
gets hosed down once a week.
388
00:19:30,639 --> 00:19:32,075
Yes.
389
00:19:32,249 --> 00:19:34,034
I knew it! That's it.
390
00:19:34,164 --> 00:19:35,644
I'm never getting up again.
391
00:19:35,818 --> 00:19:38,429
Staying here, on the ground.
392
00:19:38,516 --> 00:19:40,388
Wait, you-you said yes.
393
00:19:40,518 --> 00:19:42,869
Yes, Moe. Yes.
394
00:19:47,656 --> 00:19:51,878
♪ Memories ♪
395
00:19:51,965 --> 00:19:56,752
♪ Light the corners of my mind ♪
396
00:20:00,190 --> 00:20:02,671
♪ Misty, watercolored ♪
397
00:20:02,802 --> 00:20:07,197
♪ Memories ♪
398
00:20:07,328 --> 00:20:12,028
♪ Of the way we were. ♪
399
00:20:13,421 --> 00:20:15,466
Good song, but, uh, the movie is crap.
400
00:20:21,908 --> 00:20:22,996
What is it, Mosie?
401
00:20:23,126 --> 00:20:24,649
Oh, it's just, uh...
402
00:20:24,780 --> 00:20:26,260
I ain't never been able to use this...
403
00:20:26,347 --> 00:20:27,652
until now.
404
00:20:27,946 --> 00:20:29,253
_
405
00:20:30,141 --> 00:20:31,569
Aw.
406
00:20:31,743 --> 00:20:34,485
Here you go, my good man.
407
00:20:34,572 --> 00:20:37,053
Eh, this expired-a ten years ago.
408
00:20:37,140 --> 00:20:38,707
Ah, damn it!
409
00:20:44,121 --> 00:20:46,367
"Identify all the existentialists."
410
00:20:47,498 --> 00:20:49,152
Celebrity chefs.
411
00:20:50,501 --> 00:20:52,808
Very soft minerals.
412
00:20:52,939 --> 00:20:55,071
Bebop jazz musicians. Yes!
413
00:20:56,943 --> 00:20:58,596
Tropical birds.
414
00:21:00,163 --> 00:21:01,948
Chess grand masters?
415
00:21:03,297 --> 00:21:04,820
Stone fruits?
416
00:21:06,387 --> 00:21:08,476
American Revolutionary battles?
417
00:21:09,825 --> 00:21:11,740
Nail shank diameters?
418
00:21:12,741 --> 00:21:14,917
Aah! And I'm in. Ha.
419
00:21:15,048 --> 00:21:16,614
Lisa, time for bed.
420
00:21:16,745 --> 00:21:18,312
Oh, man.
421
00:21:24,971 --> 00:21:26,450
Shh!
422
00:21:29,065 --> 00:21:31,934
- synced and corrected by sot26 -
www.addic7ed.com
29397
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