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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:08,500 --> 00:00:11,320 Don't rot your brain on Satan's calculator. 2 00:00:11,333 --> 00:00:14,231 Babies need real toys like these. 3 00:00:22,145 --> 00:00:23,197 It's Princess Maggie. 4 00:00:24,215 --> 00:00:26,461 Princess Maggie's here. 5 00:00:26,548 --> 00:00:28,245 Princess Maggie, what's wrong? 6 00:00:28,332 --> 00:00:30,160 The girl is bored. 7 00:00:30,291 --> 00:00:32,902 Royal court, entertain my daughter at once. 8 00:00:32,989 --> 00:00:36,079 No princess can frown when her eardrums are pulsing 9 00:00:36,210 --> 00:00:38,690 with the beat of iambic pentameter. 10 00:00:40,040 --> 00:00:41,476 That's quite a frown. 11 00:00:41,563 --> 00:00:43,173 Out of my way! 12 00:00:43,304 --> 00:00:46,263 I've got no shame or regard for my own well-being. 13 00:00:47,569 --> 00:00:48,570 Hey, hey! 14 00:00:50,354 --> 00:00:52,704 You fools have failed the princess. 15 00:00:52,791 --> 00:00:55,142 We have no other option. We must give her... 16 00:00:55,272 --> 00:00:57,492 the special gift. 17 00:01:15,118 --> 00:01:18,252 Goodbye, Princess Maggie. Goodbye. 18 00:01:24,388 --> 00:01:25,389 ¡Ay, caramba! 19 00:01:29,350 --> 00:01:30,351 Oh, boy. 20 00:01:30,481 --> 00:01:31,613 Homer, your father's 21 00:01:31,787 --> 00:01:33,832 messing up the baby again. 22 00:01:54,201 --> 00:01:55,985 _ 23 00:01:56,456 --> 00:01:57,486 _ 24 00:01:59,623 --> 00:02:02,162 _ 25 00:02:15,571 --> 00:02:17,423 _ 26 00:02:17,424 --> 00:02:19,961 _ 27 00:02:20,057 --> 00:02:22,403 Way ahead of you, pal. 28 00:02:37,331 --> 00:02:38,358 My eyes... 29 00:02:40,856 --> 00:02:43,533 _ 30 00:02:43,938 --> 00:02:45,945 _ 31 00:02:45,946 --> 00:02:49,301 _ 32 00:02:55,479 --> 00:02:57,916 Where did all this traffic come from? 33 00:02:58,047 --> 00:03:00,397 It's like my favorite movie ever, Cars 3. 34 00:03:00,484 --> 00:03:02,486 I hated Cars 1 and 2. 35 00:03:08,457 --> 00:03:10,451 I'm unsupervised. 36 00:03:10,581 --> 00:03:11,887 Have no fear. 37 00:03:12,017 --> 00:03:13,932 Safety is here. 38 00:03:14,063 --> 00:03:16,457 Traffic, no traffic... what's the difference? 39 00:03:16,587 --> 00:03:19,503 I got nothing to be late for and no one who cares. 40 00:03:21,419 --> 00:03:25,348 _ 41 00:03:32,882 --> 00:03:36,799 Let's take this from Disney+ to HBO Max. 42 00:03:42,196 --> 00:03:43,980 Oh, Marge, you haven't honked 43 00:03:44,111 --> 00:03:45,416 like this since high school. 44 00:03:45,547 --> 00:03:47,462 It's a traffic jam. 45 00:03:53,903 --> 00:03:57,211 My, my, look at all those middle fingers raised to the Lord. 46 00:03:58,951 --> 00:04:01,432 Wait a minute. That car looks familiar. 47 00:04:01,563 --> 00:04:03,434 Hey, that looks like... 48 00:04:06,350 --> 00:04:08,222 No, don't go there, Moe. Don't go there. 49 00:04:08,352 --> 00:04:09,788 Erase, erase, erase! 50 00:04:12,313 --> 00:04:13,520 _ 51 00:04:14,043 --> 00:04:15,170 _ 52 00:04:15,745 --> 00:04:16,924 _ 53 00:04:18,400 --> 00:04:19,570 _ 54 00:04:20,705 --> 00:04:21,965 _ 55 00:04:23,993 --> 00:04:25,299 _ 56 00:04:25,719 --> 00:04:26,892 Oh, come on. 57 00:04:27,023 --> 00:04:28,720 We put up a sign and everything. 58 00:04:28,851 --> 00:04:30,592 This is so unreal. 59 00:04:30,766 --> 00:04:33,682 Why did all this traffic suddenly appear on our street? 60 00:04:33,812 --> 00:04:35,901 Wayz told me this was the fastest route. 61 00:04:36,032 --> 00:04:38,295 That's important when you're selling your organs. 62 00:04:38,382 --> 00:04:39,949 Oh, my God, I've heard of this. 63 00:04:40,036 --> 00:04:41,342 That app routes traffic 64 00:04:41,472 --> 00:04:43,257 through a quiet residential neighborhood, 65 00:04:43,431 --> 00:04:45,694 turning it into a gridlocked nightmare. 66 00:04:46,956 --> 00:04:49,480 ♪ Damn this traffic jam ♪ 67 00:04:49,654 --> 00:04:52,004 ♪ How I hate to be late, it hurts my motor... ♪ 68 00:04:52,135 --> 00:04:55,138 Sorry, I met someone in another car. 69 00:04:55,269 --> 00:04:57,836 ♪ Time I get home, my supper will be cold ♪ 70 00:04:57,967 --> 00:04:59,838 ♪ Damn this traffic jam ♪ 71 00:05:01,579 --> 00:05:03,625 ♪ Well, I left my job about five o'clock ♪ 72 00:05:03,799 --> 00:05:05,757 - ♪ It took 15 minutes to go three blocks... ♪ - _ 73 00:05:05,931 --> 00:05:07,759 - _ - We need to do something. 74 00:05:07,846 --> 00:05:10,022 This is driving the neighborhood nuts. 75 00:05:10,153 --> 00:05:12,416 Even the guy who's always in his underwear. 76 00:05:12,547 --> 00:05:14,288 This is more than I put on for Zoom. 77 00:05:14,418 --> 00:05:16,377 Enough with the traffic. 78 00:05:16,507 --> 00:05:18,205 I'm calling a neighborhood meeting. 79 00:05:20,250 --> 00:05:21,556 Neighborhood Meeting. 80 00:05:21,643 --> 00:05:23,171 Neighborhood meeting. 81 00:05:23,195 --> 00:05:27,039 Please rate my app. Please rate my app. 82 00:05:27,170 --> 00:05:29,912 Two stars? My IPO is ruined. 83 00:05:29,999 --> 00:05:32,436 Ruined! Ruined! 84 00:05:35,091 --> 00:05:36,527 We're here to talk about 85 00:05:36,658 --> 00:05:39,791 the terrible problem on our street. 86 00:05:39,878 --> 00:05:41,793 - Finally. - About time. 87 00:05:41,880 --> 00:05:45,797 We assume you're talking about you, the Simpsons. 88 00:05:45,884 --> 00:05:47,016 Wha...? 89 00:05:47,103 --> 00:05:48,670 I've seen the boy's moons more times 90 00:05:48,844 --> 00:05:50,889 than I've seen the real one, and I'm an astronomer. 91 00:05:51,063 --> 00:05:52,543 What's wrong with us? 92 00:05:52,674 --> 00:05:55,546 You haven't stopped by to say hello in 25 years, 93 00:05:55,677 --> 00:05:57,418 and I live next door. 94 00:05:57,548 --> 00:06:00,595 The only good one's the baby, and she shot a guy. 95 00:06:02,336 --> 00:06:03,989 Wait, are we ignoring the elephant in the room? 96 00:06:04,120 --> 00:06:06,253 By which I mean the big, fat husband. 97 00:06:06,340 --> 00:06:08,342 Every time Homer wears corduroys, 98 00:06:08,472 --> 00:06:11,388 I just hear those thighs scraping, scraping, scraping. 99 00:06:11,475 --> 00:06:14,217 Oh, my God. I'm starting to get the idea 100 00:06:14,348 --> 00:06:16,350 you think we're not good neighbors. 101 00:06:18,917 --> 00:06:20,049 You see? You see? 102 00:06:20,223 --> 00:06:21,920 Now, don't worry, my friends. 103 00:06:22,051 --> 00:06:24,532 I'm stepping forward to fix this traffic. 104 00:06:24,662 --> 00:06:27,404 And by doing so, maybe... just maybe I'll fix 105 00:06:27,491 --> 00:06:29,885 my reputation with you all. 106 00:06:30,015 --> 00:06:34,585 So just say to me what I say to Tinker Bell: "I believe." 107 00:06:36,500 --> 00:06:38,850 And... off I go. 108 00:06:41,142 --> 00:06:43,358 _ 109 00:06:44,639 --> 00:06:47,076 Um... no. 110 00:06:48,077 --> 00:06:49,470 "Identify all traffic lights." 111 00:06:49,600 --> 00:06:50,645 Done. 112 00:06:50,732 --> 00:06:52,081 "Identify all yield signs." 113 00:06:52,255 --> 00:06:53,430 Done. 114 00:06:53,517 --> 00:06:55,084 "Identify all the crosswalks." 115 00:06:55,258 --> 00:06:58,609 Oh! Lisa, help me. 116 00:06:58,740 --> 00:06:59,958 Done. 117 00:07:00,089 --> 00:07:01,699 "Identify all fire hydrants." 118 00:07:01,830 --> 00:07:02,837 Done. 119 00:07:02,874 --> 00:07:04,180 Jesuits? Done. 120 00:07:04,311 --> 00:07:05,877 20th-century dictators? 121 00:07:06,008 --> 00:07:08,358 Uh, overrated fiction? 122 00:07:08,587 --> 00:07:11,013 Hyperintelligent cartoon characters? 123 00:07:11,100 --> 00:07:12,884 Vegan nut milks? 124 00:07:13,015 --> 00:07:14,973 Future criminals? 125 00:07:15,147 --> 00:07:17,062 Aah! New England doorways! 126 00:07:17,193 --> 00:07:19,413 Oh, forget this. I'm calling instead. 127 00:07:19,587 --> 00:07:21,632 You've reached Wayz customer service. 128 00:07:21,763 --> 00:07:25,549 You have 5,700 callers ahead of you. 129 00:07:25,636 --> 00:07:28,944 Now, please enjoy the frustrated noises of other callers on hold. 130 00:07:31,120 --> 00:07:32,556 I'm gonna blow my brains out. 131 00:07:36,097 --> 00:07:37,126 You again? 132 00:07:38,912 --> 00:07:41,783 Can it be her, after all these years? 133 00:07:41,870 --> 00:07:45,352 The woman I thought was the one stuck behind my car? 134 00:07:49,138 --> 00:07:52,272 ♪ Mmm, mmm ♪ 135 00:07:54,230 --> 00:07:58,582 ♪ Mmm-mmm-mmm, mmm-mmm-mmm... ♪ 136 00:08:00,732 --> 00:08:02,369 Hi, Moe. I missed you. 137 00:08:02,499 --> 00:08:04,240 I never should've left. 138 00:08:04,371 --> 00:08:07,330 Maya. The longest, best relationship of my life. 139 00:08:07,461 --> 00:08:10,290 That was a great six days. 140 00:08:11,291 --> 00:08:13,641 You're a good kisser. 141 00:08:13,771 --> 00:08:16,165 Yeah. I practice by siphoning gas 142 00:08:16,252 --> 00:08:18,123 out of other people's tanks. 143 00:08:18,254 --> 00:08:21,301 So, is there a knob or an "open sesame" type deal or what? 144 00:08:21,388 --> 00:08:23,172 My house is over there. 145 00:08:23,303 --> 00:08:24,303 Wha...? 146 00:08:28,830 --> 00:08:31,659 Every day since you left me, I've written you a letter. 147 00:08:33,574 --> 00:08:35,583 Really wish I had gotten your address. 148 00:08:42,409 --> 00:08:44,193 So, how you been, Maya? 149 00:08:44,280 --> 00:08:46,500 Well, I finally got my PhD. 150 00:08:46,630 --> 00:08:48,371 Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. 151 00:08:48,502 --> 00:08:49,981 You taking medicine for that or what? 152 00:08:50,112 --> 00:08:51,635 Oh, Moe. 153 00:08:51,766 --> 00:08:54,203 It's nice to laugh again. How are you? 154 00:08:54,290 --> 00:08:55,987 Oh, I-I'm doing great. 155 00:08:56,074 --> 00:08:58,163 Yeah, the factory closed, so there's lots of new drunks. 156 00:08:58,294 --> 00:09:00,209 And, uh, oh, the bathroom possum 157 00:09:00,296 --> 00:09:02,559 is getting real good at handing out them combs. 158 00:09:07,888 --> 00:09:10,611 Who am I kidding? My life is a wreck, Maya. 159 00:09:10,741 --> 00:09:13,570 The face recognition software on my phone says, "Yuck." 160 00:09:13,657 --> 00:09:16,443 My playlist only has breakup songs. 161 00:09:16,530 --> 00:09:18,619 It's rough, I'm telling you, yeah. 162 00:09:18,749 --> 00:09:21,752 I miss you, Moses Marie Szyslak. 163 00:09:21,926 --> 00:09:24,102 Oh, no, no, no. Please don't give me that look. 164 00:09:24,276 --> 00:09:26,931 I can't go through it again, Maya. I can't. 165 00:09:27,062 --> 00:09:29,804 Ah, just look at you walking toward me, coming closer, 166 00:09:29,891 --> 00:09:31,762 with those big green eyes of yours 167 00:09:31,893 --> 00:09:33,373 and the great-smelling hair, 168 00:09:33,460 --> 00:09:36,245 skin smoother than American cheese. 169 00:09:39,657 --> 00:09:40,857 _ 170 00:09:40,858 --> 00:09:43,383 But I want a drink now. 171 00:09:49,127 --> 00:09:52,783 Oh, I wish this moment could last forever, like, uh... 172 00:09:52,914 --> 00:09:55,656 uh, I don't know, uh, Henry Winkler's career. 173 00:09:55,786 --> 00:09:57,658 Boy, that guy never jumped the shark. 174 00:09:57,788 --> 00:09:59,790 Not even when he jumped the shark. 175 00:09:59,964 --> 00:10:03,054 Just so I know, have you had another girlfriend since me? 176 00:10:03,228 --> 00:10:05,056 Uh, not really, no. 177 00:10:05,143 --> 00:10:06,493 Uh, no one could match you. 178 00:10:06,667 --> 00:10:09,017 I mean, I have been catfished a few times. 179 00:10:09,147 --> 00:10:10,584 Hey, Moe. 180 00:10:10,714 --> 00:10:13,021 It's us, "Online Gloria." 181 00:10:13,151 --> 00:10:15,284 I'll kill you! Also, I love you. 182 00:10:18,069 --> 00:10:20,463 Oh, Moe, you poor guy. 183 00:10:21,508 --> 00:10:23,727 Oh, everything is perfect. 184 00:10:23,814 --> 00:10:27,252 Which it always is until I say, "I love you." 185 00:10:29,864 --> 00:10:31,779 I love you. 186 00:10:32,600 --> 00:10:33,963 _ 187 00:10:35,174 --> 00:10:37,194 _ 188 00:10:37,741 --> 00:10:39,874 I love you. Will you marry me? 189 00:10:44,313 --> 00:10:46,228 _ 190 00:10:46,315 --> 00:10:47,534 To hell with women. 191 00:10:47,664 --> 00:10:49,579 I love you, New York. 192 00:10:51,407 --> 00:10:53,540 Help me. Spider-Man! 193 00:11:00,290 --> 00:11:02,723 Professor, can you get the traffic off our street? 194 00:11:02,853 --> 00:11:04,376 I'll give you anything except for money 195 00:11:04,507 --> 00:11:05,900 or credit for what you did. 196 00:11:05,987 --> 00:11:09,425 The only way to defeat a global data behemoth 197 00:11:09,556 --> 00:11:11,993 is to get into the source code. 198 00:11:12,167 --> 00:11:14,996 Just look what I did here on, uh... on the Wikipedia. 199 00:11:18,652 --> 00:11:21,176 Welcome to Wayz. 200 00:11:21,306 --> 00:11:24,222 We figure out the fastest route to get you where you want to go. 201 00:11:24,353 --> 00:11:26,703 Our secret? Always collecting data. 202 00:11:26,790 --> 00:11:28,836 But we would never misuse it. 203 00:11:28,966 --> 00:11:30,402 Who do you think we are, Google? 204 00:11:30,533 --> 00:11:32,143 Disclaimer: We're owned by Google. 205 00:11:32,274 --> 00:11:33,971 I've got the answer. What if 206 00:11:34,102 --> 00:11:36,757 we made your street... 207 00:11:36,887 --> 00:11:38,236 ...not exist? 208 00:11:38,410 --> 00:11:40,151 Well, where would we live? 209 00:11:40,238 --> 00:11:41,979 Well, that's quite silly. 210 00:11:42,110 --> 00:11:45,026 It would, of course, still exist in real life, 211 00:11:45,200 --> 00:11:47,768 but I could make it disappear from the database. 212 00:11:49,813 --> 00:11:51,554 All right, let us see here. 213 00:11:51,685 --> 00:11:53,774 Uh, keystrokes, keystrokes, escape key, 214 00:11:53,904 --> 00:11:56,907 both colon and semicolon, backslash, backslash, 215 00:11:57,038 --> 00:12:00,581 ampersand... 216 00:12:00,589 --> 00:12:03,348 we come to a new day on "no such street." 217 00:12:09,833 --> 00:12:13,271 Never again will we be afraid of cars. 218 00:12:13,445 --> 00:12:16,013 Get thee out of my way, English! 219 00:12:16,144 --> 00:12:19,190 It's time to play in the streets! 220 00:12:20,191 --> 00:12:21,628 Haw-haw! 221 00:12:28,908 --> 00:12:31,115 Climate change is real. 222 00:12:35,816 --> 00:12:37,600 They know I did this. They're making 223 00:12:37,731 --> 00:12:40,037 eye contact with me. Eye contact. 224 00:12:40,168 --> 00:12:42,736 Even the guy with the boat in his driveway. 225 00:12:42,910 --> 00:12:44,999 Hey, hey, Homer, want to come on my boat with me? 226 00:12:45,173 --> 00:12:47,436 - In the water? - Eh, we'll see. 227 00:12:47,523 --> 00:12:48,537 Uh, one step at a time. 228 00:12:48,611 --> 00:12:50,395 I will never get tired of this. 229 00:12:50,526 --> 00:12:52,833 Never. Never, ever. 230 00:12:53,877 --> 00:12:56,097 So, what do you feel like doing? 231 00:12:56,271 --> 00:12:58,447 I don't know, I... I feel like singing. 232 00:12:58,578 --> 00:13:01,015 ♪ You're bringing me sunshine ♪ 233 00:13:01,102 --> 00:13:02,886 ♪ Moe ♪ 234 00:13:03,017 --> 00:13:05,410 ♪ It's like vodka with fresh lime ♪ 235 00:13:05,541 --> 00:13:07,543 ♪ Let it flow ♪ 236 00:13:07,717 --> 00:13:09,850 ♪ I'm having a fun time ♪ 237 00:13:09,980 --> 00:13:11,895 ♪ Whoa ♪ 238 00:13:12,026 --> 00:13:14,071 ♪ Serving up red wine ♪ 239 00:13:14,202 --> 00:13:15,986 ♪ Pinot ♪ 240 00:13:16,117 --> 00:13:17,901 ♪ I drink more than I should ♪ 241 00:13:18,032 --> 00:13:20,251 ♪ Don't it, don't it, don't it, don't it ♪ 242 00:13:20,338 --> 00:13:22,123 ♪ Don't it, don't it feel good. ♪ 243 00:13:23,472 --> 00:13:25,561 Hey, are you guys an item again? 244 00:13:26,014 --> 00:13:28,216 Well, maybe, maybe. 245 00:13:28,346 --> 00:13:29,783 We definitely are. 246 00:13:29,913 --> 00:13:31,785 He has a toothbrush at my place. 247 00:13:31,915 --> 00:13:33,743 Yeah, but, yeah, it's a rental. 248 00:13:33,874 --> 00:13:36,528 Moe's the best thing that's ever happened to me. 249 00:13:36,659 --> 00:13:38,922 And this time, it's gonna last. 250 00:13:39,053 --> 00:13:40,924 Way to go, Moe. Three cheers. 251 00:13:41,098 --> 00:13:42,491 Hip, hip, hooray! 252 00:13:42,665 --> 00:13:44,928 Hip, hip, hooray! Hip, hip... 253 00:13:45,059 --> 00:13:47,365 Homer, come in the alley with me. 254 00:13:47,622 --> 00:13:50,151 My doctor warned me not to cut off a "hip, hip, hooray." 255 00:13:52,327 --> 00:13:54,068 Look, Maya left me once. 256 00:13:54,155 --> 00:13:55,896 I just know she's gonna leave me again. 257 00:13:56,026 --> 00:13:57,628 This-this is a disaster. 258 00:13:57,702 --> 00:14:00,401 You're the only guy here who knows how to hold on to a woman. 259 00:14:00,463 --> 00:14:03,164 What is your secret? How do you keep Midge? 260 00:14:03,338 --> 00:14:05,253 Well, it's, uh... it's, um... 261 00:14:05,383 --> 00:14:06,733 Hmm. 262 00:14:06,863 --> 00:14:08,517 It helps if you get them pregnant. 263 00:14:08,604 --> 00:14:11,259 Please, I need some actual, real advice here. 264 00:14:11,389 --> 00:14:13,000 Yeah, I better call Midge. 265 00:14:13,087 --> 00:14:14,479 Hello. 266 00:14:14,610 --> 00:14:16,090 Honey, I'm here in the alley with Moe. 267 00:14:16,177 --> 00:14:17,744 The only woman who ever loved him came back, 268 00:14:17,918 --> 00:14:19,484 and he's afraid she's gonna leave him again. 269 00:14:19,615 --> 00:14:20,747 What should he do? 270 00:14:20,921 --> 00:14:22,531 Hand him the phone. 271 00:14:22,705 --> 00:14:24,881 Moe, trust love. 272 00:14:24,968 --> 00:14:26,187 Gotcha. 273 00:14:26,361 --> 00:14:27,449 Your wife's an idiot. 274 00:14:27,536 --> 00:14:29,146 Another tray of doughnuts. 275 00:14:29,277 --> 00:14:30,974 This time from that family over there. 276 00:14:31,148 --> 00:14:33,498 Geez, I can't take all this adulation. 277 00:14:33,629 --> 00:14:35,762 This must be what drove Randy Quaid crazy. 278 00:14:35,849 --> 00:14:37,328 Mr. Simpson, will you throw out 279 00:14:37,415 --> 00:14:39,156 the first pitch at my Little League game? 280 00:14:39,287 --> 00:14:41,419 Want to have coffee on my boat in the parking lot? 281 00:14:41,593 --> 00:14:42,986 Do you ever take it in the water? 282 00:14:43,160 --> 00:14:44,292 Not yet. 283 00:14:44,422 --> 00:14:46,207 Please, I'm just here to eat. 284 00:14:46,381 --> 00:14:47,991 Geez, you were mad they didn't like you, 285 00:14:48,122 --> 00:14:49,993 and now you're mad they like you. 286 00:14:50,080 --> 00:14:52,474 I just want to be left alone with my to-do list. 287 00:14:52,561 --> 00:14:53,997 Excuse me. 288 00:14:54,128 --> 00:14:55,956 Will you be godfather to my baby? 289 00:14:56,086 --> 00:14:57,305 Let me see it. 290 00:14:57,435 --> 00:14:59,350 Ugh. Pass. 291 00:14:59,437 --> 00:15:02,005 Okay, Moe. I'll be back in 20 minutes. 292 00:15:02,179 --> 00:15:03,703 I'm just getting some stuff for dinner. 293 00:15:03,790 --> 00:15:05,574 - Love you. - Mwah. 294 00:15:05,705 --> 00:15:07,489 Love you, too. 295 00:15:07,576 --> 00:15:10,057 Moe. Oh, Moe. 296 00:15:10,144 --> 00:15:12,450 Huh? 297 00:15:12,581 --> 00:15:14,539 Look at you. Look at us. 298 00:15:14,670 --> 00:15:16,672 She's not gonna come back. 299 00:15:16,803 --> 00:15:19,153 - They never come back. - Oh, yeah? 300 00:15:19,240 --> 00:15:21,329 Well, this time, I'm not gonna listen to mirrors 301 00:15:21,459 --> 00:15:22,896 or mud puddles 302 00:15:23,026 --> 00:15:25,376 or my upside-down face in a spoon. 303 00:15:25,463 --> 00:15:27,509 This time, I'm gonna believe. 304 00:15:27,596 --> 00:15:29,380 Oh, no, you're not. 305 00:15:30,642 --> 00:15:32,383 No one could love you. 306 00:15:32,470 --> 00:15:34,081 Stop it, stop it, stop it! 307 00:15:34,211 --> 00:15:35,735 What does it take to get a beer around here? 308 00:15:35,822 --> 00:15:37,040 Shut up! 309 00:15:37,171 --> 00:15:39,260 Shut up? I would stop coming here 310 00:15:39,434 --> 00:15:41,349 if you weren't the only place in stumbling distance. 311 00:15:41,479 --> 00:15:43,046 You are not real. 312 00:15:43,133 --> 00:15:44,961 You're just that nagging voice of self-doubt 313 00:15:45,048 --> 00:15:46,571 that lives in my head. 314 00:15:46,702 --> 00:15:48,791 That's right. Easy in, easy out. 315 00:15:48,922 --> 00:15:50,445 Well, this time, I'm gonna stop you 316 00:15:50,575 --> 00:15:52,534 before you wreck my life. 317 00:15:55,102 --> 00:15:57,800 Now you're a loser with seven years bad luck. 318 00:16:01,238 --> 00:16:03,240 ♪ No one likes you ♪ 319 00:16:03,371 --> 00:16:05,286 ♪ You're the worst ♪ 320 00:16:05,373 --> 00:16:08,419 ♪ We'd all be happy if your head just burst ♪ 321 00:16:08,506 --> 00:16:11,683 ♪ The world could not hate you more ♪ 322 00:16:11,814 --> 00:16:16,732 ♪ You lousy, oozing canker sore ♪ 323 00:16:16,863 --> 00:16:18,865 I guess what we're trying to say is... 324 00:16:19,039 --> 00:16:22,390 ♪ You'll die alone. ♪ 325 00:16:22,520 --> 00:16:23,695 You're right. 326 00:16:23,826 --> 00:16:25,088 You beautiful bastards are right. 327 00:16:29,492 --> 00:16:30,790 - Mm-hmm. - Ah, yeah. 328 00:16:34,358 --> 00:16:36,099 Huh? What the...? 329 00:16:36,230 --> 00:16:38,449 Moe? You're hiding here? 330 00:16:38,536 --> 00:16:41,017 Yeah. Bart's treehouse is the one place 331 00:16:41,104 --> 00:16:42,845 no one will look for me. 332 00:16:42,976 --> 00:16:44,412 Plus, there are no girls allowed, 333 00:16:44,542 --> 00:16:46,718 which, uh, helps. 334 00:16:46,849 --> 00:16:48,677 Moe's going through a tough time, son. 335 00:16:48,764 --> 00:16:49,983 Just play around him. 336 00:16:50,113 --> 00:16:51,767 We'll just pretend he's a dead, rotting alien. 337 00:16:51,898 --> 00:16:53,116 Thank you, son. 338 00:16:57,773 --> 00:16:59,775 The alien's alive! 339 00:16:59,906 --> 00:17:01,777 - And it has feelings. - Kill him! 340 00:17:11,043 --> 00:17:12,867 I'm sorry, no breakfast 341 00:17:12,937 --> 00:17:15,051 until you get Moe out of the treehouse. 342 00:17:16,723 --> 00:17:19,055 And I'll keep your bacon safe while you're gone. 343 00:17:20,796 --> 00:17:23,146 Thank God I have my pocket bacon. 344 00:17:24,713 --> 00:17:27,759 Moe, you can't stay here anymore. 345 00:17:27,890 --> 00:17:30,153 Sure, I can. Uh, you want some eggs with that? 346 00:17:30,240 --> 00:17:31,938 I got 'em out of that nest over there. 347 00:17:32,068 --> 00:17:33,374 Just one. 348 00:17:33,548 --> 00:17:35,289 I don't want to be rude. 349 00:17:35,376 --> 00:17:37,508 Listen, Moe, every once in a while, 350 00:17:37,595 --> 00:17:40,947 a beautiful woman falls in love with a homely guy like us. 351 00:17:41,034 --> 00:17:42,687 You got to make the most of it. 352 00:17:42,818 --> 00:17:46,039 If Kevin James can find happiness, why can't you? 353 00:17:46,169 --> 00:17:48,345 And he was always wearing shorts. 354 00:17:48,476 --> 00:17:50,957 You know, after all these years, I dated all these women, 355 00:17:51,131 --> 00:17:53,611 and it always just goes back to square one. 356 00:17:53,742 --> 00:17:55,613 Lonely old Moe. 357 00:17:55,744 --> 00:17:57,485 Well, there is a way around that. 358 00:17:57,615 --> 00:17:58,965 You could propose. 359 00:17:59,095 --> 00:18:00,923 Wha...? 360 00:18:01,054 --> 00:18:03,752 What are you proposing I propose? 361 00:18:03,883 --> 00:18:06,307 I mean the big "M." 362 00:18:06,337 --> 00:18:08,209 - Murder-suicide? - No. 363 00:18:08,339 --> 00:18:10,733 - Marriage. - Marriage? Whoa. 364 00:18:10,864 --> 00:18:12,517 You mean I could have the thing you're always 365 00:18:12,648 --> 00:18:14,694 coming into my bar and moaning about? 366 00:18:16,783 --> 00:18:18,349 You know what? She's worth it. 367 00:18:18,480 --> 00:18:20,134 I'll give it a shot. 368 00:18:22,250 --> 00:18:24,791 Okay. This is as far as we go. 369 00:18:24,965 --> 00:18:26,662 Yeah, yeah, okay. 370 00:18:26,836 --> 00:18:28,229 Let me just straighten myself up. 371 00:18:45,463 --> 00:18:48,205 You'd better speak fast, or for the second time, 372 00:18:48,336 --> 00:18:50,033 you're gonna lose the first good thing 373 00:18:50,207 --> 00:18:51,687 that's ever happened to you. 374 00:18:51,861 --> 00:18:53,602 I'm so sorry. You're great, so great, 375 00:18:53,689 --> 00:18:55,300 and all I've been is afraid. 376 00:18:58,041 --> 00:19:00,478 But all I got to do is look in your eyes. 377 00:19:00,652 --> 00:19:02,567 Baby, I love you so much. 378 00:19:02,698 --> 00:19:05,222 You stick with me, you'll get everything you ever wanted. 379 00:19:05,353 --> 00:19:07,050 I will never doubt you again. 380 00:19:07,181 --> 00:19:08,617 You can control the remote. 381 00:19:08,748 --> 00:19:10,924 You can pick all our vacations. 382 00:19:11,054 --> 00:19:13,535 And because I know the ladies like it this way, 383 00:19:13,622 --> 00:19:16,233 I will leave the toilet seat on. 384 00:19:16,364 --> 00:19:19,062 Maya, will you marry me? 385 00:19:23,719 --> 00:19:25,155 Forget it, loser. 386 00:19:25,286 --> 00:19:27,418 Gorillas like us don't get the girl. 387 00:19:27,505 --> 00:19:30,552 We're lucky if our cage gets hosed down once a week. 388 00:19:30,639 --> 00:19:32,075 Yes. 389 00:19:32,249 --> 00:19:34,034 I knew it! That's it. 390 00:19:34,164 --> 00:19:35,644 I'm never getting up again. 391 00:19:35,818 --> 00:19:38,429 Staying here, on the ground. 392 00:19:38,516 --> 00:19:40,388 Wait, you-you said yes. 393 00:19:40,518 --> 00:19:42,869 Yes, Moe. Yes. 394 00:19:47,656 --> 00:19:51,878 ♪ Memories ♪ 395 00:19:51,965 --> 00:19:56,752 ♪ Light the corners of my mind ♪ 396 00:20:00,190 --> 00:20:02,671 ♪ Misty, watercolored ♪ 397 00:20:02,802 --> 00:20:07,197 ♪ Memories ♪ 398 00:20:07,328 --> 00:20:12,028 ♪ Of the way we were. ♪ 399 00:20:13,421 --> 00:20:15,466 Good song, but, uh, the movie is crap. 400 00:20:21,908 --> 00:20:22,996 What is it, Mosie? 401 00:20:23,126 --> 00:20:24,649 Oh, it's just, uh... 402 00:20:24,780 --> 00:20:26,260 I ain't never been able to use this... 403 00:20:26,347 --> 00:20:27,652 until now. 404 00:20:27,946 --> 00:20:29,253 _ 405 00:20:30,141 --> 00:20:31,569 Aw. 406 00:20:31,743 --> 00:20:34,485 Here you go, my good man. 407 00:20:34,572 --> 00:20:37,053 Eh, this expired-a ten years ago. 408 00:20:37,140 --> 00:20:38,707 Ah, damn it! 409 00:20:44,121 --> 00:20:46,367 "Identify all the existentialists." 410 00:20:47,498 --> 00:20:49,152 Celebrity chefs. 411 00:20:50,501 --> 00:20:52,808 Very soft minerals. 412 00:20:52,939 --> 00:20:55,071 Bebop jazz musicians. Yes! 413 00:20:56,943 --> 00:20:58,596 Tropical birds. 414 00:21:00,163 --> 00:21:01,948 Chess grand masters? 415 00:21:03,297 --> 00:21:04,820 Stone fruits? 416 00:21:06,387 --> 00:21:08,476 American Revolutionary battles? 417 00:21:09,825 --> 00:21:11,740 Nail shank diameters? 418 00:21:12,741 --> 00:21:14,917 Aah! And I'm in. Ha. 419 00:21:15,048 --> 00:21:16,614 Lisa, time for bed. 420 00:21:16,745 --> 00:21:18,312 Oh, man. 421 00:21:24,971 --> 00:21:26,450 Shh! 422 00:21:29,065 --> 00:21:31,934 - synced and corrected by sot26 - www.addic7ed.com 29397

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