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00:00:03,901 --> 00:00:08,901
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3
00:00:13,901 --> 00:00:15,821
If you'd be so good
as to follow me,
4
00:00:15,821 --> 00:00:18,381
ladies and gentlemen.
5
00:00:18,381 --> 00:00:21,581
- AMERICAN ACCENT:
- So the game begins, huh?
6
00:00:21,581 --> 00:00:24,341
GONG CLANGS REPEATEDLY
7
00:00:24,341 --> 00:00:26,261
Thanks a lot.
8
00:00:26,261 --> 00:00:28,061
Oh!
9
00:00:31,221 --> 00:00:33,741
You're all here.
CHUCKLING
10
00:00:33,741 --> 00:00:35,261
Marvellous.
11
00:00:35,261 --> 00:00:37,541
Luncheon is served.
12
00:00:37,541 --> 00:00:39,701
With a side dish of...
13
00:00:41,101 --> 00:00:43,821
..murder!
14
00:00:44,981 --> 00:00:46,701
ALL CHUCKLE
15
00:00:49,901 --> 00:00:52,701
Now, first of all,
meet your detective -
16
00:00:52,701 --> 00:00:55,181
actor and national treasure
Anthony Hart,
17
00:00:55,181 --> 00:00:56,781
or, as you know him,
18
00:00:56,781 --> 00:00:59,341
Elliot Flame from
television's Phoenix.
19
00:00:59,341 --> 00:01:00,861
WHOOPING
20
00:01:00,861 --> 00:01:04,741
Um, Aunt Hel, I thought I was
supposed to play the victim.
21
00:01:04,741 --> 00:01:05,821
You were.
22
00:01:07,381 --> 00:01:09,901
Dad?!
MURMURING
23
00:01:09,901 --> 00:01:11,221
SCREAMING
24
00:01:26,621 --> 00:01:27,661
{\an8}THUNDER RUMBLES
25
00:01:29,701 --> 00:01:32,781
{\an8}- BAXTER:
- One fatal stab
to the heart.
26
00:01:32,781 --> 00:01:35,261
{\an8}- OFFICER:
- DS Mallowan.
27
00:01:35,261 --> 00:01:37,301
{\an8}Nice of you to join us.
We were expecting you
28
00:01:37,301 --> 00:01:38,741
{\an8}- half an hour ago.
- I know, I know.
29
00:01:38,741 --> 00:01:40,621
{\an8}Car trouble. But don't worry,
sir, I'm on it.
30
00:01:40,621 --> 00:01:42,821
{\an8}Just got to order a new part.
31
00:01:42,821 --> 00:01:44,661
{\an8}Well, a really old part.
32
00:01:44,661 --> 00:01:46,861
{\an8}A detective needs a car
that works, not a mobile skip.
33
00:01:46,861 --> 00:01:50,661
{\an8}Yeah, absolutely, sir -
great point. Couldn't agree more.
34
00:01:50,661 --> 00:01:53,621
Now, half the guests were
on a garden tour all morning,
35
00:01:53,621 --> 00:01:55,461
so we've ruled them out
and sent them home,
36
00:01:55,461 --> 00:01:57,381
but we need statements
from the others,
37
00:01:57,381 --> 00:01:58,941
and the Chief Super wants this
wrapped up
38
00:01:58,941 --> 00:02:01,421
as quickly as possible to keep
the eyes of the press off us.
39
00:02:01,421 --> 00:02:03,101
It'll be like a circus
here tomorrow.
40
00:02:03,101 --> 00:02:05,341
Are you saying
I've only got 24 hours?
41
00:02:05,341 --> 00:02:07,461
- What? No.
- Aw. Can you?
42
00:02:07,461 --> 00:02:08,901
Makes it feel proper dramatic.
43
00:02:08,901 --> 00:02:11,461
Look, wrap this up quickly,
44
00:02:11,461 --> 00:02:13,621
and keep the force
from press scrutiny,
45
00:02:13,621 --> 00:02:16,021
and that promotion's
as good as yours.
46
00:02:16,021 --> 00:02:17,981
Great. Where's Chaudhry?
47
00:02:17,981 --> 00:02:20,941
Farming dispute. Gibsons and
the Lewises, out near Cefnisel.
48
00:02:20,941 --> 00:02:23,541
It's all kicked off there.
I've got to go too.
49
00:02:23,541 --> 00:02:25,461
Two officers for warring farmers?
50
00:02:25,461 --> 00:02:28,061
No. Kayleigh's been suspended
from school
51
00:02:28,061 --> 00:02:30,061
for spreading malicious rumours
about a teacher,
52
00:02:30,061 --> 00:02:32,101
which I happen to know
are perfectly true,
53
00:02:32,101 --> 00:02:33,141
but that's beside the point.
54
00:02:33,141 --> 00:02:34,861
Well, don't worry, sir,
I've got it down here.
55
00:02:34,861 --> 00:02:36,341
Right, thanks. Keep me posted.
56
00:02:36,341 --> 00:02:40,101
Oh! Also, you two were
teenage girls once -
57
00:02:40,101 --> 00:02:42,581
say, hypothetically,
your father locked you
58
00:02:42,581 --> 00:02:45,381
in a police cell to teach you
about responsibility,
59
00:02:45,381 --> 00:02:47,941
do you think that would be
a good life lesson or...?
60
00:02:47,941 --> 00:02:49,181
BOTH: No.
61
00:02:50,221 --> 00:02:51,581
OK.
62
00:02:53,341 --> 00:02:57,261
Right, cause of death, stab wound
directly to the heart.
63
00:02:57,261 --> 00:02:59,981
Angle of entry suggests the killer
was standing in front of him.
64
00:02:59,981 --> 00:03:01,061
No defence wounds.
65
00:03:01,061 --> 00:03:03,381
Interesting detail
about the weapon, though.
66
00:03:03,381 --> 00:03:05,901
It's not a knife,
it's a letter opener.
67
00:03:05,901 --> 00:03:08,901
Other strange detail -
he's wearing make-up.
68
00:03:08,901 --> 00:03:11,901
Foundation over his left eye.
Someone punched him.
69
00:03:11,901 --> 00:03:14,061
Fairly recently,
from the look of it.
70
00:03:14,061 --> 00:03:16,941
- Anthony Hart.
- Mm.
71
00:03:16,941 --> 00:03:18,021
Legend.
72
00:03:19,301 --> 00:03:21,861
Sounds wrong to say it, but
I thought he was already dead.
73
00:03:21,861 --> 00:03:23,661
Me too!
74
00:03:29,941 --> 00:03:31,261
- WAITRESS:
- Can I go home?
75
00:03:31,261 --> 00:03:32,861
This is a murder investigation.
76
00:03:32,861 --> 00:03:35,941
Nobody is going to leave this house
until I've taken a statement.
77
00:03:37,141 --> 00:03:39,621
Look at the police notebook, honey.
78
00:03:39,621 --> 00:03:40,901
The attention to detail!
79
00:03:40,901 --> 00:03:43,981
Not sure I buy those shoes
on a cop, though.
80
00:03:43,981 --> 00:03:45,061
HE CHUCKLES
81
00:03:45,061 --> 00:03:47,541
OK, er, sorry,
what are both your names?
82
00:03:47,541 --> 00:03:50,581
Huh? Oh...
CLEARS HIS THROAT
83
00:03:50,581 --> 00:03:53,901
- IN SOUTH AFRICAN ACCENT:
- I'm Tannis Fairweather,
84
00:03:53,901 --> 00:03:56,101
owner of a South African
diamond mine.
85
00:03:56,101 --> 00:03:58,341
- AMERICAN ACCENT:
- Patty and Bill Marcus.
86
00:03:58,341 --> 00:04:01,661
I keep trying to explain to him
that this is not part of the game.
87
00:04:01,661 --> 00:04:04,741
It's not. It's absolutely not.
Someone died.
88
00:04:04,741 --> 00:04:07,381
- SOUTH AFRICAN ACCENT:
- Sure, Officer.
89
00:04:07,381 --> 00:04:10,581
OK, um, can everybody apart
from the family of the deceased
90
00:04:10,581 --> 00:04:11,901
please wait outside?
91
00:04:11,901 --> 00:04:13,141
- Right.
- Gladly.
92
00:04:13,141 --> 00:04:14,741
I need a drink.
93
00:04:14,741 --> 00:04:17,101
Who would want to kill Dad?
94
00:04:17,101 --> 00:04:19,301
It's horrible.
95
00:04:19,301 --> 00:04:21,181
So, you both lived here
with Anthony?
96
00:04:21,181 --> 00:04:24,221
Er, no, urgh. No, I live in Ibiza.
97
00:04:24,221 --> 00:04:26,421
I am only here
because Dad came home.
98
00:04:26,421 --> 00:04:28,941
My brother came back last month.
99
00:04:28,941 --> 00:04:31,701
He'd signed up
to do these events for a year.
100
00:04:31,701 --> 00:04:34,621
- This is the Hart family home.
- DOORBELL RINGS
101
00:04:34,621 --> 00:04:37,101
Oh, good, that'll be him.
102
00:04:37,101 --> 00:04:40,781
I've asked a friend to come round -
I need someone to be with me.
103
00:04:40,781 --> 00:04:41,821
This is a murder scene!
104
00:04:41,821 --> 00:04:43,861
You can't be inviting
random people along!
105
00:04:43,861 --> 00:04:45,941
He's not some random person.
106
00:04:45,941 --> 00:04:47,661
He's a very dear old friend.
107
00:04:47,661 --> 00:04:50,061
Oh, right, well,
why didn't you say so?!
108
00:04:53,781 --> 00:04:55,461
Oh, Johnny!
109
00:04:55,461 --> 00:04:57,381
My hero!
110
00:04:57,381 --> 00:05:00,381
Fighting through the rain
to comfort me.
111
00:05:01,741 --> 00:05:04,141
Helena, it's so awful. I...
112
00:05:04,141 --> 00:05:06,821
Anthony, murdered? I...
113
00:05:06,821 --> 00:05:08,661
- Unthinkable, isn't it?
- Mm.
114
00:05:08,661 --> 00:05:10,301
I've got a houseful
of strangers,
115
00:05:10,301 --> 00:05:12,461
I just needed someone familiar.
116
00:05:15,061 --> 00:05:16,781
Oh...
HE CHUCKLES SOFTLY
117
00:05:16,781 --> 00:05:19,781
Um, look, I, er... I know
what you're going through,
118
00:05:19,781 --> 00:05:21,701
and the last thing you want
to be doing is cooking,
119
00:05:21,701 --> 00:05:24,981
so I picked some food up.
120
00:05:24,981 --> 00:05:28,621
Oh, Johnny...
121
00:05:28,621 --> 00:05:30,661
..this is why I needed you.
122
00:05:30,661 --> 00:05:32,301
You understand me.
123
00:05:33,741 --> 00:05:36,701
I think you may be one of the few
people I've never understood.
124
00:05:36,701 --> 00:05:38,061
JANIE CLEARS HER THROAT
125
00:05:39,901 --> 00:05:41,901
Um, can I have a word with...
126
00:05:41,901 --> 00:05:44,061
..Johnny, is it?
127
00:05:44,061 --> 00:05:45,221
Mm.
128
00:05:47,901 --> 00:05:49,701
This is your new case, is it?
129
00:05:49,701 --> 00:05:51,461
Yes, and it's very time-sensitive.
130
00:05:51,461 --> 00:05:53,381
If I wanted your help,
I would've called.
131
00:05:53,381 --> 00:05:55,741
Oh, yeah, Dial-a-Lackey,
of course, yeah.
132
00:05:55,741 --> 00:05:59,021
Well, it's been quite a time
since you've pestered me,
133
00:05:59,021 --> 00:06:00,901
I thought perhaps
you'd passed me over,
134
00:06:00,901 --> 00:06:04,181
now that you were up and running.
135
00:06:04,181 --> 00:06:07,901
- Hey!
- If you're going to touch
evidence, glove up!
136
00:06:07,901 --> 00:06:11,061
Oh, these horrible things.
137
00:06:11,061 --> 00:06:15,501
Ugh! Make me look
like some ageing Smurf.
138
00:06:15,501 --> 00:06:16,821
- Eugh.
- OK.
139
00:06:19,381 --> 00:06:23,221
Interesting murder weapon,
though, isn't it, eh?
140
00:06:23,221 --> 00:06:26,381
A table covered in steak knives,
141
00:06:26,381 --> 00:06:28,261
yet they use a letter opener?
142
00:06:28,261 --> 00:06:30,821
It tells us
that the weapon is significant,
143
00:06:30,821 --> 00:06:33,701
pregnant with meaning
to our malefactor.
144
00:06:33,701 --> 00:06:36,541
Or...they just grabbed
it from the house.
145
00:06:36,541 --> 00:06:38,181
Helena's not the type to own
a letter opener.
146
00:06:38,181 --> 00:06:40,261
Precision's not in her armoury.
147
00:06:40,261 --> 00:06:42,901
She'd tear her envelopes open.
148
00:06:42,901 --> 00:06:44,741
A very passionate woman.
149
00:06:45,661 --> 00:06:49,061
Is she now, John Chapel?!
150
00:06:49,061 --> 00:06:51,421
Is that why you're here?
151
00:06:51,421 --> 00:06:53,901
To get your leg over?
152
00:06:53,901 --> 00:06:56,621
Well, I am not here
to get my leg over,
153
00:06:56,621 --> 00:06:58,421
you appalling vulgarian!
154
00:06:59,541 --> 00:07:02,821
Helena is a dear friend.
We actually met through Anthony.
155
00:07:03,821 --> 00:07:06,421
Some of my happiest memories
are in this house.
156
00:07:06,421 --> 00:07:08,301
So you were mates?
157
00:07:08,301 --> 00:07:12,261
Very good mates for a while.
Then, sadly, bitter rivals.
158
00:07:12,261 --> 00:07:15,061
Phoenix on ITV, Caesar on BBC.
159
00:07:15,061 --> 00:07:16,501
Got quite feisty.
160
00:07:16,501 --> 00:07:18,581
Mm. Well, he won in the end.
161
00:07:18,581 --> 00:07:22,661
What?! You think Anthony Hart
was more successful than me
162
00:07:22,661 --> 00:07:24,741
because he chose
to defect to America?
163
00:07:24,741 --> 00:07:26,821
Why didn't you ever go
to America?
164
00:07:26,821 --> 00:07:29,341
Oh, I was asked. Begged, even.
165
00:07:29,341 --> 00:07:31,021
I could never make the dates work.
166
00:07:31,021 --> 00:07:34,221
Anyway, can you picture me
167
00:07:34,221 --> 00:07:37,301
sitting around a pool all day
in my Speedos?
168
00:07:37,301 --> 00:07:39,661
Oh, I've had enough traumatic
images in my head today
169
00:07:39,661 --> 00:07:40,821
with the dead body.
170
00:07:40,821 --> 00:07:42,621
Do you mind?!
There was a time
171
00:07:42,621 --> 00:07:45,021
when I happened to look
rather striking in a Speedo.
172
00:07:45,021 --> 00:07:46,861
Couldn't get away with
it now, though -
173
00:07:46,861 --> 00:07:49,861
- too much danglage.
- Ohh, right. OK.
174
00:07:49,861 --> 00:07:53,261
I'm going to go
and ask Helena what she knows
175
00:07:53,261 --> 00:07:54,781
about the murder weapon.
176
00:07:54,781 --> 00:07:56,741
And I'll see what I can
find out from the other guests.
177
00:07:56,741 --> 00:07:59,221
But don't take too long
with Helena.
178
00:07:59,221 --> 00:08:01,021
She must be suffering terribly.
179
00:08:04,701 --> 00:08:08,941
DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES
180
00:08:08,941 --> 00:08:10,941
Interesting, Chapel.
181
00:08:16,541 --> 00:08:17,581
Mm...
182
00:08:19,021 --> 00:08:20,861
Very interesting.
183
00:08:23,781 --> 00:08:24,821
Oh...
184
00:08:26,181 --> 00:08:28,221
- HELENA:
- Never seen it before
in my life.
185
00:08:28,221 --> 00:08:30,781
I'm fairly certain
it isn't from the house,
186
00:08:30,781 --> 00:08:34,781
though I have had
four rather strong whiskies.
187
00:08:34,781 --> 00:08:36,181
Right.
188
00:08:36,181 --> 00:08:37,501
Very interesting.
189
00:08:38,501 --> 00:08:41,061
Actually, not that interesting.
Don't know why I said that.
190
00:08:41,061 --> 00:08:42,421
So...
191
00:08:42,421 --> 00:08:45,381
..you and John Chapel -
what's the story there?
192
00:08:45,381 --> 00:08:48,901
Oh, brilliant, sensitive John.
193
00:08:48,901 --> 00:08:51,821
Would wake a girl up with
a poem and a buttered teacake.
194
00:08:51,821 --> 00:08:54,701
You used to wake up
with John Chapel...?
195
00:08:54,701 --> 00:08:56,061
Yes.
196
00:08:56,061 --> 00:08:57,261
Is this relevant?
197
00:08:57,261 --> 00:09:00,301
Very. It's...essen...
essential background.
198
00:09:00,301 --> 00:09:01,901
Oh, right.
199
00:09:01,901 --> 00:09:05,461
Johnny used to stay here a lot
back in the '80s,
200
00:09:05,461 --> 00:09:08,581
um, and, well, we...
201
00:09:08,581 --> 00:09:10,901
..we had a bit of a fling.
Nothing serious.
202
00:09:10,901 --> 00:09:12,981
He was a wonderful lovemaker.
203
00:09:12,981 --> 00:09:15,461
Oh, God. God. No. Um...
204
00:09:15,461 --> 00:09:19,741
And then fate intervened.
I went on holiday to Marrakech.
205
00:09:19,741 --> 00:09:22,741
While I was away,
he met the lovely Elin.
206
00:09:22,741 --> 00:09:25,941
They were soulmates from the off.
207
00:09:25,941 --> 00:09:28,461
I came back with a deep tan,
208
00:09:28,461 --> 00:09:31,341
a gorgeous rug
and a broken heart.
209
00:09:31,341 --> 00:09:32,661
Aw.
210
00:09:33,741 --> 00:09:36,301
At least you got a rug.
THUNDER RUMBLES
211
00:09:36,301 --> 00:09:37,901
Mm.
212
00:09:37,901 --> 00:09:40,021
And you've stayed in touch
all this time?
213
00:09:40,021 --> 00:09:42,901
No, no, no, he went off-grid
when Elin died.
214
00:09:42,901 --> 00:09:45,701
Poor thing. Wouldn't even pick up
the phone.
215
00:09:45,701 --> 00:09:49,061
It's only recently
he's got back in touch.
216
00:09:49,061 --> 00:09:52,461
- Why?
- There's a young lady
in his life.
217
00:09:52,461 --> 00:09:55,141
Nothing like that -
an acquaintance.
218
00:09:55,141 --> 00:09:57,861
But, um...whatever she's done,
219
00:09:57,861 --> 00:10:00,221
he's really back to his old self.
220
00:10:00,221 --> 00:10:02,021
Seems to be alive again.
221
00:10:02,021 --> 00:10:04,141
JANIE CHUCKLES SOFTLY
222
00:10:04,141 --> 00:10:05,781
Did I mention
223
00:10:05,781 --> 00:10:07,621
he was a wonderful lovemaker?
224
00:10:07,621 --> 00:10:09,861
OK, I think we're done. Yeah.
225
00:10:09,861 --> 00:10:11,541
Oh, marvellous. Well...um...
226
00:10:12,821 --> 00:10:16,701
I think I might go
for a bit of a lie-down.
227
00:10:16,701 --> 00:10:20,861
Do, er, wake me up
if you find the killer.
228
00:10:23,501 --> 00:10:25,221
- WAITRESS:
- There you go.
229
00:10:26,421 --> 00:10:28,661
You did say tea, yeah?
230
00:10:28,661 --> 00:10:31,341
Oh, actually, I asked for an
extra-hot latte machi...
231
00:10:31,341 --> 00:10:34,181
Yeah. Thought that might
be a challenge.
232
00:10:34,181 --> 00:10:35,501
Izzy's a nice girl,
233
00:10:35,501 --> 00:10:38,101
but she's slightly useless
for a silver-service waitress.
234
00:10:38,101 --> 00:10:39,501
She was so spooked earlier,
235
00:10:39,501 --> 00:10:41,941
she bolted upstairs to the bathroom
when she saw the body.
236
00:10:41,941 --> 00:10:44,941
Well, that's interesting.
Excuse me.
237
00:10:44,941 --> 00:10:48,381
Er... Oh, yeah, no, yeah,
just walk away.
238
00:10:48,381 --> 00:10:50,461
I was definitely
done talking, so...
239
00:10:53,101 --> 00:10:54,141
Don't mind me.
240
00:10:54,141 --> 00:10:56,181
- SOUTH AFRICAN ACCENT:
- Quite the tricky murder
241
00:10:56,181 --> 00:10:58,181
we've got going on here, eh?
HE CHUCKLES
242
00:10:58,181 --> 00:11:00,981
Well, this is a murder.
A man is dead.
243
00:11:02,181 --> 00:11:04,181
HE LAUGHS
244
00:11:04,181 --> 00:11:06,101
I've tried, Mr Chapel.
245
00:11:06,101 --> 00:11:07,701
I'm Patty Marcus.
246
00:11:07,701 --> 00:11:10,541
- This is Bill.
- Charmed.
247
00:11:10,541 --> 00:11:14,221
Sorry, love,
I think that's got sugar in.
248
00:11:14,221 --> 00:11:16,301
It's the margaritas
all over again, huh?
249
00:11:16,301 --> 00:11:17,461
The margaritas?
250
00:11:17,461 --> 00:11:19,861
Anthony asked me to make him
a margarita earlier.
251
00:11:19,861 --> 00:11:23,021
He took one sip, said it was
disgusting and then he lost it.
252
00:11:23,021 --> 00:11:24,341
When was this?
253
00:11:24,341 --> 00:11:27,181
At the welcome drinks,
when we all arrived.
254
00:11:27,181 --> 00:11:30,661
Then he cleared off. Locked himself
in his room all day, even though
255
00:11:30,661 --> 00:11:33,181
we'd paid good money
to meet him.
256
00:11:33,181 --> 00:11:35,101
Er, Dennis Williams.
257
00:11:35,101 --> 00:11:38,301
I can make cocktails. I worked
the bar in Cardiff Infernos.
258
00:11:38,301 --> 00:11:40,101
I made the best
Skittle bombs out of anyone.
259
00:11:40,101 --> 00:11:42,021
I don't doubt it.
Cardiff Infernos -
260
00:11:42,021 --> 00:11:45,821
I wouldn't dare cast aspersions
on your mixology skills.
261
00:11:45,821 --> 00:11:47,901
Oh! Thanks, love!
262
00:11:49,061 --> 00:11:51,101
Look, I know probably now
is a bad time,
263
00:11:51,101 --> 00:11:53,501
but I've just got to say
I am such a huge fan.
264
00:11:53,501 --> 00:11:55,781
I've even watched
your masterclass DVD.
265
00:11:55,781 --> 00:11:58,221
Really? Well, that's amazing.
266
00:11:58,221 --> 00:12:00,501
Yeah, we found it in Grandad's
underwear drawer when we were
267
00:12:00,501 --> 00:12:01,821
clearing his house out.
268
00:12:01,821 --> 00:12:04,181
It's belting, seeing how hard
you work. Fair play.
269
00:12:04,181 --> 00:12:07,221
Well...you know,
acting, proper acting,
270
00:12:07,221 --> 00:12:09,021
it can be incredibly taxing.
271
00:12:09,021 --> 00:12:11,461
And nurses think
they've got it tough.
272
00:12:11,461 --> 00:12:13,981
Sorry, just pulling your leg.
273
00:12:15,301 --> 00:12:17,261
Marvellous sense of humour!
274
00:12:17,261 --> 00:12:19,781
It's all right, I'm not immune
to a bit of ribbing.
275
00:12:21,181 --> 00:12:24,021
You seem like a
sharp tack, Dennis.
276
00:12:24,021 --> 00:12:26,021
What's your take on all this?
277
00:12:26,021 --> 00:12:28,821
I think it's the curse of Phoenix.
278
00:12:28,821 --> 00:12:31,261
The curse of Phoenix?
279
00:12:31,261 --> 00:12:34,621
Ah, you have to tell me
all about this.
280
00:12:34,621 --> 00:12:39,261
Well, there was a girl worked
on the show who died years ago.
281
00:12:39,261 --> 00:12:42,861
And two actors suffered
heart attacks while filming.
282
00:12:42,861 --> 00:12:46,461
- And now this.
- There's no such thing
as bloody curses!
283
00:12:46,461 --> 00:12:49,061
Anthony wasn't killed
by a myth or a legend,
284
00:12:49,061 --> 00:12:51,661
it was someone in this house.
285
00:12:51,661 --> 00:12:54,701
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I need the loo.
286
00:12:54,701 --> 00:12:56,901
Prostate the size of a cantaloupe.
287
00:12:56,901 --> 00:12:59,061
BILL LAUGHS
288
00:12:59,061 --> 00:13:00,501
Can I borrow Mr Chapel?
289
00:13:01,701 --> 00:13:04,141
- Please excuse me.
- Yeah, right.
290
00:13:07,061 --> 00:13:10,301
How can I help, Detective?
QUIET CHATTER
291
00:13:10,301 --> 00:13:13,141
So, what do you make
of our guests?
292
00:13:13,141 --> 00:13:15,301
An interesting little bunch.
293
00:13:15,301 --> 00:13:18,181
Well, Dennis, something
not quite right there,
294
00:13:18,181 --> 00:13:20,261
no, no, but what is it, Chapel?
What is it?
295
00:13:20,261 --> 00:13:22,261
Performance, artifice -
it's not his thing at all,
296
00:13:22,261 --> 00:13:25,341
but he's here,
at a murder mystery event.
297
00:13:25,341 --> 00:13:28,021
No, that dog won't hunt,
no, no. Plus, he mocked me.
298
00:13:28,021 --> 00:13:29,981
Oh, right, yeah,
he bruised your ego
299
00:13:29,981 --> 00:13:32,981
so he must be our killer?
Anything actually useful?
300
00:13:32,981 --> 00:13:36,581
Anthony spent all afternoon in his
room. Have you searched it yet?
301
00:13:36,581 --> 00:13:38,021
Not yet, but I was going to.
302
00:13:38,021 --> 00:13:40,021
- Oh, yeah?
- Do you want to come?
303
00:13:40,021 --> 00:13:43,541
Well, I really ought to go
and see Helena.
304
00:13:43,541 --> 00:13:44,821
She's having a lie-down.
305
00:13:44,821 --> 00:13:47,421
But you could wake her up
in a bit, with a...
306
00:13:47,421 --> 00:13:49,861
..poem and a buttered teacake.
307
00:13:49,861 --> 00:13:52,621
- What?
- Mm! Come on.
308
00:13:59,021 --> 00:14:02,181
Ah! Ah-ha-ha!
309
00:14:02,181 --> 00:14:06,141
Somebody's hand-delivered
a letter to Anthony.
310
00:14:08,341 --> 00:14:09,421
And... Oh.
PHONE RINGS
311
00:14:09,421 --> 00:14:11,101
- Oh!
- ..it's missing.
312
00:14:12,821 --> 00:14:15,381
Dean!
313
00:14:15,381 --> 00:14:16,821
Yes, thank you.
314
00:14:17,981 --> 00:14:20,341
Yeah, I need to bring
my car in again.
315
00:14:20,341 --> 00:14:24,421
The usual.
And there's a burnt-hair smell.
316
00:14:24,421 --> 00:14:26,861
Oh, and it keeps making
this noise.
317
00:14:26,861 --> 00:14:28,501
Er...
318
00:14:28,501 --> 00:14:31,181
Well, sort of like, um...
319
00:14:31,181 --> 00:14:33,501
SHE SCREECHES
320
00:14:35,221 --> 00:14:37,901
Thank you. Thanks, thanks. Bye.
321
00:14:40,741 --> 00:14:43,941
Very interesting -
car sentimentality.
322
00:14:44,901 --> 00:14:47,741
Usually get it with men,
or parents,
323
00:14:47,741 --> 00:14:49,261
but I don't get it with you.
324
00:14:49,261 --> 00:14:50,501
There's nothing to get.
I like my car.
325
00:14:50,501 --> 00:14:53,821
I like VHS tapes -
I don't watch them any more.
326
00:14:53,821 --> 00:14:56,261
It's not as simple as that.
327
00:14:56,261 --> 00:14:57,781
My car...
328
00:14:57,781 --> 00:15:00,101
..it was Sian's.
She left it to me,
329
00:15:00,101 --> 00:15:02,421
so it means a bit more
than a flipping VHS tape.
330
00:15:04,581 --> 00:15:07,381
It's funny - we used to
pretend to be you.
331
00:15:07,381 --> 00:15:10,781
Just driving round,
looking for crime.
332
00:15:10,781 --> 00:15:14,181
She was a weirdo too, was she?
No wonder you were close.
333
00:15:14,181 --> 00:15:16,061
Oi! We weren't weird,
we were cool.
334
00:15:16,061 --> 00:15:18,181
And I don't want to watch
all of that just get crushed up
335
00:15:18,181 --> 00:15:20,461
into a little...metal cube,
336
00:15:20,461 --> 00:15:22,061
so just leave my car alone.
337
00:15:22,061 --> 00:15:23,141
Right.
338
00:15:25,901 --> 00:15:28,861
Very odd mix of magazines.
339
00:15:28,861 --> 00:15:32,621
Anthony didn't seem
the celeb junk-mag type to me.
340
00:15:34,741 --> 00:15:36,981
There's nothing here.
341
00:15:36,981 --> 00:15:38,501
Do you think this looks
like someone
342
00:15:38,501 --> 00:15:40,421
who was planning on
staying for good?
343
00:15:40,421 --> 00:15:42,421
Well, it's hard to say,
isn't it?
344
00:15:42,421 --> 00:15:44,621
Us actors aren't
all about possessions.
345
00:15:44,621 --> 00:15:48,381
Our accumulated baggage
is on the inside.
346
00:15:48,381 --> 00:15:50,461
I don't think he was staying.
347
00:15:50,461 --> 00:15:53,821
Helena said he'd signed up
to do these events for a year.
348
00:15:54,901 --> 00:15:56,421
If he was going to do a runner,
349
00:15:56,421 --> 00:15:58,501
that would give her
a pretty good motive.
350
00:15:58,501 --> 00:16:00,701
Helena? Fratricide?
It's preposterous.
351
00:16:00,701 --> 00:16:04,541
Why don't you go and, um,
rouse her from her slumber,
352
00:16:04,541 --> 00:16:05,901
see what you can find out?
353
00:16:05,901 --> 00:16:09,061
I'm here to comfort Helena,
not interrogate her.
354
00:16:09,061 --> 00:16:11,421
Anyway, we should be talking
to the son, Owen.
355
00:16:11,421 --> 00:16:13,741
He just came back
to see his father,
356
00:16:13,741 --> 00:16:16,981
who is then murdered -
seems very...coincidental.
357
00:16:16,981 --> 00:16:19,621
OK, deal. I'll go talk to him,
358
00:16:19,621 --> 00:16:22,701
and you go charm
the lady of the manor.
359
00:16:25,301 --> 00:16:26,901
Um...
360
00:16:26,901 --> 00:16:30,181
I, er... I haven't read
this week's, and, um,
361
00:16:30,181 --> 00:16:34,741
well, I need to flush out
a little suspect of my own.
362
00:16:34,741 --> 00:16:37,981
TOILET FLUSHES
363
00:16:37,981 --> 00:16:40,341
GENTLE MUSIC
364
00:16:40,341 --> 00:16:42,901
So...Ibiza...
365
00:16:44,661 --> 00:16:46,861
Sounds nice.
366
00:16:46,861 --> 00:16:48,181
Lots of parties.
367
00:16:48,181 --> 00:16:50,901
That's what my life used to
look like, but not now.
368
00:16:50,901 --> 00:16:53,061
I run a wellness retreat.
369
00:16:53,061 --> 00:16:55,501
Why Ibiza? Couldn't you run
a wellness retreat here?
370
00:16:55,501 --> 00:16:57,221
HE CHUCKLES
371
00:16:57,221 --> 00:16:59,581
Nobody gets well in Powys.
372
00:16:59,581 --> 00:17:02,861
For a start, you need vitamin D
and sunshine.
373
00:17:02,861 --> 00:17:06,701
- Do you have to do that now?
- Yoga's great for processing grief.
374
00:17:06,701 --> 00:17:08,621
HE WAILS
375
00:17:08,621 --> 00:17:10,941
HE SIGHS
376
00:17:10,941 --> 00:17:12,381
You grew up here?
377
00:17:12,381 --> 00:17:15,101
Ah, do you know?
Sometimes I wish I'd just had
378
00:17:15,101 --> 00:17:17,101
a more wholesome,
humble upbringing -
379
00:17:17,101 --> 00:17:19,021
like you probably had.
380
00:17:19,021 --> 00:17:20,821
Excuse me?! We had Sky!
381
00:17:20,821 --> 00:17:22,421
And we went to Crete!
382
00:17:22,421 --> 00:17:23,781
HE CHUCKLES
383
00:17:23,781 --> 00:17:25,821
Did anything
out of the ordinary happen
384
00:17:25,821 --> 00:17:28,501
running up to the event?
HE INHALES DEEPLY
385
00:17:28,501 --> 00:17:31,181
No, I don't think so.
386
00:17:31,181 --> 00:17:32,981
Although...
387
00:17:32,981 --> 00:17:36,261
Oh, a few days ago,
Dad was acting strange.
388
00:17:36,261 --> 00:17:38,821
- How?
- Kept trying to get rid
of everyone.
389
00:17:38,821 --> 00:17:41,141
Sent Aunt Hel off into town
to get supplies
390
00:17:41,141 --> 00:17:43,501
and told me to make myself
scarce for the afternoon.
391
00:17:43,501 --> 00:17:47,501
But I came back early
and he wasn't alone.
392
00:17:47,501 --> 00:17:48,781
He was with a woman.
393
00:17:48,781 --> 00:17:51,181
THUNDER CRASHES
Whoa...K!
394
00:17:51,181 --> 00:17:53,421
Can you describe this woman?
395
00:17:53,421 --> 00:17:57,221
Yeah, um, she was young,
dark hair.
396
00:17:57,221 --> 00:17:58,941
A bit like you, I suppose.
397
00:17:58,941 --> 00:18:01,061
But elegant and stylish.
398
00:18:01,061 --> 00:18:04,901
I'm stylish. Have you seen
my little crop jacky?
399
00:18:04,901 --> 00:18:06,661
Oof...
400
00:18:06,661 --> 00:18:08,061
DOOR CLOSES
401
00:18:08,061 --> 00:18:10,461
It's a little croppy jacky.
402
00:18:10,461 --> 00:18:13,381
You, up on the roof,
403
00:18:13,381 --> 00:18:15,901
bellowing poetry in a hurricane.
404
00:18:15,901 --> 00:18:17,581
We all thought you were mad!
405
00:18:17,581 --> 00:18:20,901
No, no, the technical term
is steaming, I think...
406
00:18:20,901 --> 00:18:23,501
Latvian vodka,
if I remember correctly,
407
00:18:23,501 --> 00:18:24,661
which I probably don't!
408
00:18:24,661 --> 00:18:26,061
BOTH CHUCKLE
409
00:18:26,061 --> 00:18:27,821
Oh, Johnny.
410
00:18:27,821 --> 00:18:30,421
I feel awful laughing
in all this.
411
00:18:31,581 --> 00:18:33,781
Are you OK, Helena?
412
00:18:33,781 --> 00:18:35,141
Really?
413
00:18:35,141 --> 00:18:36,941
I have to be.
414
00:18:36,941 --> 00:18:40,101
There's much to be done, and this
place doesn't look after itself.
415
00:18:41,341 --> 00:18:44,901
Is it not a bit too much
for you on your own?
416
00:18:44,901 --> 00:18:46,861
Sometimes.
417
00:18:46,861 --> 00:18:50,061
It'd be nice to have
someone else around to help.
418
00:18:50,061 --> 00:18:51,701
Mm.
419
00:18:51,701 --> 00:18:53,541
Owen comes now and then -
420
00:18:53,541 --> 00:18:56,301
usually when
he's run out of money.
421
00:18:56,301 --> 00:18:58,941
Perceptive of him
to come to you for money,
422
00:18:58,941 --> 00:19:01,061
rather than Anthony.
423
00:19:01,061 --> 00:19:03,781
Well, they'd had their troubles.
424
00:19:03,781 --> 00:19:07,141
He did rather run off the rails
in his youth.
425
00:19:07,141 --> 00:19:10,621
I say that's what
being young's for, but, er,
426
00:19:10,621 --> 00:19:13,381
Anthony was very hard on him.
427
00:19:13,381 --> 00:19:15,061
Even yesterday, they had a row.
428
00:19:15,061 --> 00:19:16,621
What about?
429
00:19:16,621 --> 00:19:18,021
I've no idea.
430
00:19:18,021 --> 00:19:19,621
Now, that's very odd.
431
00:19:21,261 --> 00:19:23,541
This door is always locked.
432
00:19:24,901 --> 00:19:26,541
That's the third door
that's like it -
433
00:19:26,541 --> 00:19:29,381
there are two more upstairs
that have been unlocked.
434
00:19:29,381 --> 00:19:32,061
Very strange.
THUNDER RUMBLES
435
00:19:34,701 --> 00:19:36,101
Thank you for being here.
436
00:19:36,101 --> 00:19:38,901
Makes everything
that much more bearable.
437
00:19:38,901 --> 00:19:39,981
CLOCK CHIMES
438
00:19:39,981 --> 00:19:42,861
I just want everyone
out of this house.
439
00:19:42,861 --> 00:19:44,821
I think the police
will be done soon,
440
00:19:44,821 --> 00:19:46,181
and everyone will be
out of your hair.
441
00:19:46,181 --> 00:19:48,741
Yeah... That's not happening.
442
00:19:48,741 --> 00:19:50,341
The road's flooded.
443
00:19:51,741 --> 00:19:54,621
I'm sorry, but you will all
have to stay here overnight.
444
00:19:54,621 --> 00:19:57,501
BILL: Oh! Little predictable,
but I like it.
445
00:19:57,501 --> 00:19:59,461
Izzy, where have you been?
446
00:20:00,661 --> 00:20:02,301
I was just taking the bins out.
447
00:20:02,301 --> 00:20:04,141
In this weather?
448
00:20:04,141 --> 00:20:05,941
Is everyone here insane?
449
00:20:08,341 --> 00:20:10,461
Well, I suggest everybody
locks themselves
450
00:20:10,461 --> 00:20:11,901
in their rooms until the morning,
451
00:20:11,901 --> 00:20:13,901
when hopefully the road
will be clear.
452
00:20:15,821 --> 00:20:20,381
CAESAR: I am certain
of two things, Atkins.
453
00:20:20,381 --> 00:20:23,421
One - there is a killer
in our midst.
454
00:20:23,421 --> 00:20:26,781
And two - they shall
presently lament
455
00:20:26,781 --> 00:20:31,341
trying to commit a murder
under the nose of Charles Caesar.
456
00:20:31,341 --> 00:20:33,901
We've had a statement in from one of
the neighbours, sir.
457
00:20:33,901 --> 00:20:36,261
Do you have to watch that now?
458
00:20:36,261 --> 00:20:38,261
It helps me think.
459
00:20:38,261 --> 00:20:40,941
But it... Well, it's distracting.
460
00:20:41,981 --> 00:20:44,901
It's transported me back
to my character.
461
00:20:44,901 --> 00:20:46,661
It's conflicting my psyche...
462
00:20:46,661 --> 00:20:48,221
- Oh, this is a good bit.
- Mm.
463
00:20:48,221 --> 00:20:49,821
PHONE RINGS
Oh.
464
00:20:51,501 --> 00:20:52,581
Chaudhry!
465
00:20:52,581 --> 00:20:54,221
Sorry, I was meant
to call you earlier,
466
00:20:54,221 --> 00:20:55,901
but I've been with
the Lewises all day.
467
00:20:55,901 --> 00:20:57,621
I've got to get a team in
from Welsh Water
468
00:20:57,621 --> 00:20:58,941
to clear out
the drains tomorrow
469
00:20:58,941 --> 00:21:01,141
before Dave Lewis -
and I quote -
470
00:21:01,141 --> 00:21:03,061
puts Tom Gibson
through the wall.
471
00:21:03,061 --> 00:21:05,221
Aw, that sounds really boring.
472
00:21:05,221 --> 00:21:06,701
Are you joking?
473
00:21:06,701 --> 00:21:10,261
They're going to let me hold
the big hose! I can't wait!
474
00:21:10,261 --> 00:21:13,821
Anyways, I've been looking
into Anthony Hart.
475
00:21:13,821 --> 00:21:15,621
You're going to want
to hear this.
476
00:21:15,621 --> 00:21:18,541
He was booked on a flight
back to LA next week.
477
00:21:18,541 --> 00:21:19,901
So he wasn't sticking around?
478
00:21:19,901 --> 00:21:21,661
No. But also,
479
00:21:21,661 --> 00:21:24,541
he filed for bankruptcy
in the US. He was skint.
480
00:21:25,621 --> 00:21:27,421
OK, bye!
481
00:21:28,541 --> 00:21:30,661
Well, the bankruptcy explains
482
00:21:30,661 --> 00:21:34,221
why Anthony was doing
those events. He needed the money.
483
00:21:34,221 --> 00:21:36,781
That's a very
unimaginative conclusion.
484
00:21:36,781 --> 00:21:40,621
Oh, for f... OK,
why do you imagine I'm wrong?
485
00:21:40,621 --> 00:21:42,141
Because if Anthony needed money,
486
00:21:42,141 --> 00:21:43,901
his agent could have got
him an advert.
487
00:21:43,901 --> 00:21:46,021
It would have been easier and
ultimately less humiliating.
488
00:21:46,021 --> 00:21:48,461
But bankruptcy?
We're talking a lot of money.
489
00:21:48,461 --> 00:21:49,941
I bought a boat once
490
00:21:49,941 --> 00:21:52,821
from just doing an advert
for Japanese vacuum cleaners.
491
00:21:52,821 --> 00:21:55,181
Mind you, it wasn't
just for the money -
492
00:21:55,181 --> 00:21:57,381
I actually believed
in Saku Suck And Clean.
493
00:21:58,581 --> 00:22:00,141
O...K.
494
00:22:00,141 --> 00:22:04,981
Well, while I YouTube that,
why don't we call it a night?
495
00:22:04,981 --> 00:22:09,781
You could, um, go
for a nightcap with Helena?
496
00:22:09,781 --> 00:22:11,381
No, I don't think so.
497
00:22:12,701 --> 00:22:15,381
Why? She clearly fancies you.
498
00:22:16,581 --> 00:22:18,221
Don't you like her?
499
00:22:19,541 --> 00:22:22,261
Of course I do.
What's stopping you?
500
00:22:22,261 --> 00:22:23,901
You're single.
501
00:22:23,901 --> 00:22:26,461
I haven't been a single man
since 1986.
502
00:22:27,701 --> 00:22:30,821
- I have a wife.
- You can't keep
living in the past.
503
00:22:30,821 --> 00:22:34,181
Oh, that's rich, coming from
someone driving around in hers.
504
00:22:34,181 --> 00:22:36,461
Now, just leave it, OK?
505
00:22:36,461 --> 00:22:37,901
OK. Fine.
506
00:22:42,621 --> 00:22:44,381
RAIN LASHES
507
00:22:46,341 --> 00:22:48,181
DOOR CREAKS
508
00:22:49,301 --> 00:22:51,501
DRIPPING
509
00:23:17,701 --> 00:23:20,821
THUNDER RUMBLES
510
00:23:20,821 --> 00:23:21,861
- Johnny?!
- Oh, God!
511
00:23:21,861 --> 00:23:23,941
TORCH CLANGS
Helena, I'm so sorry.
512
00:23:23,941 --> 00:23:25,061
HELENA CHUCKLES
Um...
513
00:23:25,061 --> 00:23:27,581
- Don't know which is which.
- This is mine.
514
00:23:27,581 --> 00:23:29,661
Oh, right. Yeah, this is mine.
515
00:23:29,661 --> 00:23:31,381
Sorry about that.
516
00:23:31,381 --> 00:23:35,021
Ooh! I see you've found
your old dressing gown.
517
00:23:35,021 --> 00:23:37,501
- Yeah.
- It still fits.
518
00:23:37,501 --> 00:23:38,701
Yes, it does, yeah.
519
00:23:40,781 --> 00:23:42,821
Brought back some memories.
520
00:23:44,541 --> 00:23:48,101
Fond memories, I hope.
521
00:23:48,101 --> 00:23:49,141
Oh, yeah.
522
00:23:50,661 --> 00:23:52,941
Well, um...
523
00:23:52,941 --> 00:23:54,901
..I...I don't think
524
00:23:54,901 --> 00:23:58,261
I'm going to get
back to sleep right now.
525
00:23:59,261 --> 00:24:02,941
Maybe a nightcap
might be a...good idea?
526
00:24:05,661 --> 00:24:07,101
Maybe.
527
00:24:07,101 --> 00:24:08,381
Ah...
528
00:24:10,101 --> 00:24:11,621
Yes.
529
00:24:17,581 --> 00:24:20,021
You do that, then. I...
530
00:24:20,021 --> 00:24:21,261
I'd better not join you.
531
00:24:21,261 --> 00:24:24,381
I'll only end up on the roof
532
00:24:24,381 --> 00:24:26,461
shouting poetry again, yeah.
533
00:24:26,461 --> 00:24:30,661
A bit dangerous in this weather.
I'd be like a lightning rod, yeah.
534
00:24:30,661 --> 00:24:32,581
HE IMITATES EXPLOSION
535
00:24:32,581 --> 00:24:34,861
HE YAWNS
Pew!
536
00:24:34,861 --> 00:24:36,461
Better get my head down.
537
00:24:36,461 --> 00:24:39,621
Eight hours and all that - advisable
for our age group, I believe.
538
00:24:39,621 --> 00:24:41,061
Yeah, heard it on a podcast.
539
00:24:41,061 --> 00:24:43,741
Yeah.
I won't...I won't keep you.
540
00:24:43,741 --> 00:24:45,741
Night-night. Er, sleep tight.
541
00:24:45,741 --> 00:24:49,461
- Mm.
- All that... Nighty-night.
542
00:24:49,461 --> 00:24:51,341
DOOR CLOSES
543
00:24:51,341 --> 00:24:52,581
SHE SIGHS
544
00:24:52,581 --> 00:24:54,461
I've slept on it
and I think I know
545
00:24:54,461 --> 00:24:56,901
who the mystery woman
that Owen saw is.
546
00:24:56,901 --> 00:24:59,141
What if, right,
547
00:24:59,141 --> 00:25:01,901
she is the lover
548
00:25:01,901 --> 00:25:03,941
Anthony came back for,
549
00:25:03,941 --> 00:25:05,621
but she had a jealous husband,
550
00:25:05,621 --> 00:25:09,221
and the husband joined
the murder-mystery event...
551
00:25:10,181 --> 00:25:12,941
..to kill his love rival?
552
00:25:12,941 --> 00:25:13,981
Dennis.
553
00:25:13,981 --> 00:25:16,581
What, Dennis had
a glamorous younger wife?
554
00:25:16,581 --> 00:25:19,861
- Mm.
- What did they talk about -
his enlarged prostate?
555
00:25:19,861 --> 00:25:21,381
No, no, no, no.
556
00:25:21,381 --> 00:25:23,621
Well, I don't see you coming up
with any better ideas.
557
00:25:23,621 --> 00:25:25,781
While you were busy sleeping,
558
00:25:25,781 --> 00:25:28,781
my subconscious and
my antennae were busy deducing.
559
00:25:28,781 --> 00:25:29,941
Oh...
560
00:25:29,941 --> 00:25:31,461
It's obvious who this woman is.
561
00:25:31,461 --> 00:25:33,741
Getting everyone out of
the house? The unlocked doors?
562
00:25:33,741 --> 00:25:35,541
It must have been
an estate agent.
563
00:25:35,541 --> 00:25:37,301
Anthony was going
to sell the house?
564
00:25:37,301 --> 00:25:39,501
Well, it's the only logical
reason for him to come back.
565
00:25:39,501 --> 00:25:42,221
He needed money fast.
It was his only asset.
566
00:25:42,221 --> 00:25:45,021
An estate agent would want
to see every room,
567
00:25:45,021 --> 00:25:47,421
hence the unlocked doors.
568
00:25:47,421 --> 00:25:49,781
Mm. I'll get Chaudhry
to look into it.
569
00:25:50,821 --> 00:25:52,821
OK.
570
00:25:52,821 --> 00:25:54,861
If Dennis didn't do it,
571
00:25:54,861 --> 00:25:57,621
how about Owen?
He could be our killer.
572
00:25:57,621 --> 00:25:58,861
Why?
573
00:25:58,861 --> 00:26:01,821
Because he's annoying,
and I don't trust him.
574
00:26:01,821 --> 00:26:05,181
All his yoga and his yoga gear
and his yoga pants...
575
00:26:05,181 --> 00:26:07,381
You've got more of an issue
with yoga than Owen.
576
00:26:07,381 --> 00:26:08,501
Well, it's just stretching,
577
00:26:08,501 --> 00:26:10,581
and everyone that does it
thinks they're Gwyneth Paltrow,
578
00:26:10,581 --> 00:26:12,181
and I'm sick of it!
579
00:26:12,181 --> 00:26:14,661
Plus, he smells of biscuits.
580
00:26:14,661 --> 00:26:16,261
- Mm.
- He's guilty.
581
00:26:16,261 --> 00:26:19,421
If we just knew
why him and Anthony argued,
582
00:26:19,421 --> 00:26:20,781
we could prove it.
583
00:26:24,021 --> 00:26:26,461
Well, you're not going to find
the answer in there.
584
00:26:28,901 --> 00:26:30,741
Actually...
585
00:26:30,741 --> 00:26:32,101
WATER SPLASHES
Can't this wait?
586
00:26:32,101 --> 00:26:34,581
I'm kind of busy right now, because
our useless maid for the weekend
587
00:26:34,581 --> 00:26:36,821
just leaves all the cocktail
stuff lying around.
588
00:26:36,821 --> 00:26:39,901
It won't take long.
Ooh, tequila!
589
00:26:39,901 --> 00:26:42,021
I love a tequila slammer.
590
00:26:42,021 --> 00:26:44,461
Yeah, you seem like
the sort of person who would.
591
00:26:47,261 --> 00:26:50,221
Right, we need to talk now.
592
00:26:50,221 --> 00:26:51,821
About this.
593
00:26:54,101 --> 00:26:56,861
"Love Island Star's
Hideaway Regret"?
594
00:26:56,861 --> 00:26:58,781
- Oh, er...
- No, no, er...
595
00:26:58,781 --> 00:27:01,181
Just, er...
596
00:27:01,181 --> 00:27:03,181
"London Party Animals."
597
00:27:03,181 --> 00:27:06,021
That would be you rolling
out of the back of a cab
598
00:27:06,021 --> 00:27:07,981
- in Soho, mm?
- Mm?
599
00:27:07,981 --> 00:27:10,581
That's why you
and Anthony argued.
600
00:27:10,581 --> 00:27:11,941
There is no wellness retreat.
601
00:27:11,941 --> 00:27:15,301
You've been living in London,
partying on Daddy's money.
602
00:27:15,301 --> 00:27:17,861
He found out
and summoned you home.
603
00:27:17,861 --> 00:27:19,381
You had to make it look like
604
00:27:19,381 --> 00:27:22,021
you were living in Ibiza,
hence the fake tan.
605
00:27:23,101 --> 00:27:25,301
Looks the part, but as
anyone whose mam loves fake tan
606
00:27:25,301 --> 00:27:28,261
as much as mine knows,
it smells like biscuits.
607
00:27:28,261 --> 00:27:29,821
The nose doesn't lie.
608
00:27:31,621 --> 00:27:33,101
Fine.
609
00:27:33,101 --> 00:27:34,581
Yeah.
610
00:27:34,581 --> 00:27:37,781
Dad called me and told me
to "come home at once"!
611
00:27:37,781 --> 00:27:41,741
And, well, you know,
you don't ignore the big chief.
612
00:27:41,741 --> 00:27:43,661
And Anthony showed you
the magazine?
613
00:27:43,661 --> 00:27:46,061
Mm. Said it was the final straw.
614
00:27:46,061 --> 00:27:48,221
- MOCKINGLY:
- "No more money."
615
00:27:48,221 --> 00:27:50,901
- Pretty big motive for murder.
- Mm.
616
00:27:50,901 --> 00:27:52,901
OK, now, wait a minute.
617
00:27:52,901 --> 00:27:55,701
OK, he was threatening
to cut me off all the time.
618
00:27:55,701 --> 00:27:57,581
Plus, I could just borrow
from Aunt Hel.
619
00:27:57,581 --> 00:28:00,701
Or bump him off
and inherit everything?
620
00:28:00,701 --> 00:28:04,221
Look... I...I wouldn't.
I couldn't do it.
621
00:28:04,221 --> 00:28:06,421
You know, most of
the Zen stuff's an act,
622
00:28:06,421 --> 00:28:08,741
but deep down I'm actually
a really peaceful guy.
623
00:28:08,741 --> 00:28:12,661
Hugs, not drugs, you know?
Although I do really love drugs.
624
00:28:12,661 --> 00:28:15,941
Look, if anyone wanted to hurt
Dad, it was that old guy.
625
00:28:15,941 --> 00:28:17,101
He threatened him.
626
00:28:18,261 --> 00:28:20,461
You threatened to punch Anthony.
627
00:28:20,461 --> 00:28:22,381
Was it you that gave him
the black eye?
628
00:28:22,381 --> 00:28:24,941
No! We had words, that's all.
629
00:28:24,941 --> 00:28:27,741
I was standing up for the girl.
The maid.
630
00:28:27,741 --> 00:28:29,421
- Izzy?
- Yeah.
631
00:28:29,421 --> 00:28:32,301
He had a pop at her about his
margarita being too sweet,
632
00:28:32,301 --> 00:28:35,301
- so I told him to pick
on someone his own size.
- Mm.
633
00:28:36,381 --> 00:28:39,381
PHONE RINGS
Ooh.
634
00:28:39,381 --> 00:28:43,581
Chaudhry. Yeah, er,
I-I've got to take this, sorry.
635
00:28:43,581 --> 00:28:45,861
Chaudhry? What did you get?
636
00:28:45,861 --> 00:28:48,621
Well, hopefully
we can all go home soon.
637
00:28:48,621 --> 00:28:51,181
Not soon enough,
as far as I'm concerned.
638
00:28:51,181 --> 00:28:53,701
Well, this is what I can't
understand about you, Dennis.
639
00:28:53,701 --> 00:28:55,021
DOOR CLOSES
640
00:28:55,021 --> 00:28:57,541
Everyone else,
I get why they're here.
641
00:28:57,541 --> 00:29:00,501
They enjoy all this,
the...artifice.
642
00:29:01,621 --> 00:29:03,181
So do I.
643
00:29:03,181 --> 00:29:05,421
"And nurses think
they've got it tough"?
644
00:29:05,421 --> 00:29:09,381
No, no, you've no time
for dressing up, make-believe.
645
00:29:09,381 --> 00:29:11,221
You're a practical man.
646
00:29:11,221 --> 00:29:15,461
So why have you spent
a small fortune to be here?
647
00:29:17,381 --> 00:29:19,741
You're right.
648
00:29:19,741 --> 00:29:21,701
I'm not like the others.
649
00:29:22,661 --> 00:29:23,821
Oddballs.
650
00:29:25,621 --> 00:29:29,341
I think a lot of TV crime
stuff's just nonsense.
651
00:29:29,341 --> 00:29:31,221
Agreed.
652
00:29:31,221 --> 00:29:34,101
Well, it's actually what made
Caesar so remarkable.
653
00:29:34,101 --> 00:29:37,421
But it's not about Caesar,
sorry. Carry on.
654
00:29:37,421 --> 00:29:39,341
I am a sucker for Phoenix.
655
00:29:39,341 --> 00:29:41,541
Really? I found it to be formulaic,
656
00:29:41,541 --> 00:29:43,421
but it's all a matter of taste,
of course.
657
00:29:43,421 --> 00:29:45,181
No, please...please carry on.
658
00:29:45,181 --> 00:29:46,781
My daughter was a huge fan.
659
00:29:46,781 --> 00:29:49,661
We'd watch it together
every week without fail.
660
00:29:49,661 --> 00:29:52,501
What happened to your daughter,
Dennis?
661
00:29:52,501 --> 00:29:54,861
She moved to Canada. Years ago.
662
00:29:56,021 --> 00:29:57,621
I don't see her any more.
663
00:29:57,621 --> 00:29:59,941
It's only Canada.
664
00:29:59,941 --> 00:30:01,861
Flights are cheaper
than coming here.
665
00:30:01,861 --> 00:30:04,021
It's not that simple.
666
00:30:04,021 --> 00:30:05,341
We fell out.
667
00:30:06,701 --> 00:30:08,661
Things can't go back
to how they were.
668
00:30:09,741 --> 00:30:11,061
No. They never can.
669
00:30:12,141 --> 00:30:14,901
That's why I came here, really.
670
00:30:14,901 --> 00:30:16,621
Daft old sod.
671
00:30:16,621 --> 00:30:18,621
I saw it advertised
and I thought
672
00:30:18,621 --> 00:30:22,781
it might feel like me and her
were still together somehow.
673
00:30:22,781 --> 00:30:24,381
I didn't want to admit it,
674
00:30:24,381 --> 00:30:27,581
because, well,
it makes me sound bonkers.
675
00:30:28,701 --> 00:30:30,541
You're not bonkers, Dennis.
676
00:30:31,981 --> 00:30:34,581
Well, maybe you are, but, er...
677
00:30:37,501 --> 00:30:39,701
..we're all a bit bonkers,
aren't we?
678
00:30:39,701 --> 00:30:41,221
HE CHUCKLES
679
00:30:41,221 --> 00:30:42,541
Ah, yes.
680
00:30:43,541 --> 00:30:47,061
OK, I will need you to come in
and make an official statement.
681
00:30:47,061 --> 00:30:48,901
Yes, bye. Love you.
682
00:30:48,901 --> 00:30:51,381
Doh...dunno why I said that!
Argh, hang up!
683
00:30:52,741 --> 00:30:54,341
That was our estate agent.
684
00:30:54,341 --> 00:30:55,861
MY estate agent.
685
00:30:55,861 --> 00:30:58,181
You thought it was Dennis's
younger wife, remember?
686
00:30:58,181 --> 00:30:59,741
Mm, potato, tomay-to.
687
00:30:59,741 --> 00:31:02,381
She did meet with Anthony
to put the house on the market.
688
00:31:02,381 --> 00:31:05,461
She called back to confirm
some details a few days ago,
689
00:31:05,461 --> 00:31:07,741
but said the call was answered
by Anthony's sister.
690
00:31:07,741 --> 00:31:09,781
- No.
- Yes.
691
00:31:09,781 --> 00:31:12,101
Helena said
they were still considering it
692
00:31:12,101 --> 00:31:14,901
and hadn't confirmed 100%
whether they'd be selling.
693
00:31:16,061 --> 00:31:19,741
No, no, no, no, Helena would never
sell the house.
694
00:31:19,741 --> 00:31:21,341
Which puts Helena in the frame.
695
00:31:22,461 --> 00:31:26,301
There was a call from some woman
but I was rushed off my feet.
696
00:31:26,301 --> 00:31:30,541
I just said what I thought
would...get her off the line.
697
00:31:30,541 --> 00:31:32,221
Ooh! Oh!
698
00:31:32,221 --> 00:31:36,101
I must have, er...must have got
a...shock
699
00:31:36,101 --> 00:31:37,861
from the light switch.
700
00:31:37,861 --> 00:31:39,941
You didn't confront Anthony?
701
00:31:39,941 --> 00:31:42,421
I didn't think he was serious.
702
00:31:45,701 --> 00:31:48,181
Weird. Didn't hurt me.
703
00:31:48,181 --> 00:31:50,381
But then I didn't hurt
my hand attacking Anthony.
704
00:31:50,381 --> 00:31:52,181
God, I'm good - admit it.
705
00:31:52,181 --> 00:31:54,181
Maybe not the time,
but very good, yes.
706
00:31:55,981 --> 00:31:57,381
Is it true, Helena?
707
00:32:00,301 --> 00:32:02,701
The selfishness.
WASHING MACHINE DOOR BANGS
708
00:32:02,701 --> 00:32:05,021
Typical Anthony.
709
00:32:05,021 --> 00:32:06,941
He was trying to sell my home.
710
00:32:06,941 --> 00:32:09,141
You couldn't let that happen,
so you didn't. You stopped him.
711
00:32:09,141 --> 00:32:12,341
No, no, no, no. We argued.
I was furious and I hit him,
712
00:32:12,341 --> 00:32:13,821
but that was all.
713
00:32:13,821 --> 00:32:16,341
I needed him to make
these events a success.
714
00:32:16,341 --> 00:32:18,661
I'd spent months
putting everything in place.
715
00:32:18,661 --> 00:32:20,541
Not strictly true -
not everything.
716
00:32:22,261 --> 00:32:24,621
Think, Chapel.
717
00:32:24,621 --> 00:32:27,581
Yes. The name cards...
718
00:32:27,581 --> 00:32:29,061
..were in the wrong place.
719
00:32:29,061 --> 00:32:32,221
But I triple-checked
all the place settings myself
720
00:32:32,221 --> 00:32:33,301
yesterday morning.
721
00:32:33,301 --> 00:32:35,221
It's definitely in
the wrong place. See?
722
00:32:35,221 --> 00:32:37,621
Well, that's even stranger.
723
00:32:37,621 --> 00:32:40,781
The name's wrong.
There was no Lorna Maddison.
724
00:32:40,781 --> 00:32:42,701
Patty was supposed to be
a different name.
725
00:32:42,701 --> 00:32:45,981
Mary Murphy O'Toole. I came up
with all the names myself,
726
00:32:45,981 --> 00:32:48,221
and I was particularly pleased
with that one.
727
00:32:48,221 --> 00:32:50,621
- Very Irish.
- Mm.
728
00:32:50,621 --> 00:32:52,061
It's been tampered with.
729
00:32:54,621 --> 00:32:56,541
So who is Lorna Maddison?
730
00:32:56,541 --> 00:32:58,741
Lorna Maddison - worked
as a production assistant
731
00:32:58,741 --> 00:33:00,621
on the TV show Phoenix.
732
00:33:00,621 --> 00:33:01,781
Where is she now?
733
00:33:01,781 --> 00:33:03,061
Dead.
734
00:33:03,061 --> 00:33:06,421
Died in a car crash in 2007
whilst working on the show.
735
00:33:06,421 --> 00:33:09,621
According to the inquest,
she fell asleep at the wheel.
736
00:33:09,621 --> 00:33:11,341
She was driving
from set to London
737
00:33:11,341 --> 00:33:13,101
after a 15-hour working day
738
00:33:13,101 --> 00:33:15,741
to go pick up Anthony Hart's
mail from his house.
739
00:33:15,741 --> 00:33:19,221
All that to pick up some mail?
What an arse.
740
00:33:19,221 --> 00:33:21,741
Left behind a husband
and a six-month-old daughter.
741
00:33:21,741 --> 00:33:22,901
Aw...
742
00:33:22,901 --> 00:33:25,621
Also, we've had an update
from Baxter on the toxicology.
743
00:33:25,621 --> 00:33:27,301
Said she's rushed
the results through,
744
00:33:27,301 --> 00:33:29,021
so you owe her a Pizza Express.
745
00:33:29,021 --> 00:33:31,221
Every time!
What else did she say?
746
00:33:31,221 --> 00:33:34,021
Well, the cause of death
is still a letter opener,
747
00:33:34,021 --> 00:33:37,221
but Anthony had traces of
ethylene glycol in his system.
748
00:33:37,221 --> 00:33:38,941
Somebody had tried
to poison him.
749
00:33:38,941 --> 00:33:40,861
How much did everyone
hate this guy?!
750
00:33:40,861 --> 00:33:42,341
Ethylene glycol?
751
00:33:42,341 --> 00:33:45,661
Found in brake fluid.
Not enough to kill him.
752
00:33:45,661 --> 00:33:48,901
Apparently, it's quite easy
to hide. It tastes quite sweet.
753
00:33:48,901 --> 00:33:50,221
Thanks, Chaudhry.
754
00:33:50,221 --> 00:33:52,021
Well, that explains
why Anthony thought
755
00:33:52,021 --> 00:33:54,741
there was too much sugar syrup
in his margarita.
756
00:33:54,741 --> 00:33:55,821
Mm.
757
00:33:55,821 --> 00:34:00,581
And it does rather
implicate Izzy in his death.
758
00:34:00,581 --> 00:34:03,221
- But why would she do it?
- I don't know.
759
00:34:03,221 --> 00:34:06,821
Ah...the only motives I can see
come from the family,
760
00:34:06,821 --> 00:34:09,941
and Izzy is not family.
761
00:34:10,901 --> 00:34:12,421
She might be.
762
00:34:13,661 --> 00:34:15,181
Yeah, of course.
763
00:34:15,181 --> 00:34:17,301
The name card,
764
00:34:17,301 --> 00:34:19,941
the letter opener,
Lorna Maddison -
765
00:34:19,941 --> 00:34:21,941
it all comes back to her.
766
00:34:21,941 --> 00:34:24,301
Somebody wanted revenge
for what happened.
767
00:34:25,621 --> 00:34:26,701
Who?
768
00:34:26,701 --> 00:34:30,061
Lorna's daughter.
The six-month-old baby girl!
769
00:34:30,061 --> 00:34:31,781
She'd be about 18 now.
770
00:34:31,781 --> 00:34:35,741
It's possible. She clearly lied
to get the job working here.
771
00:34:35,741 --> 00:34:37,541
Silver-service waitresses
don't tend to come
772
00:34:37,541 --> 00:34:39,461
straight from Cardiff Infernos.
773
00:34:39,461 --> 00:34:42,501
But why go to all the bother? Why
not just bump him off in the street?
774
00:34:42,501 --> 00:34:44,581
She didn't want
to just kill him -
775
00:34:44,581 --> 00:34:46,301
she wanted him
to know why,
776
00:34:46,301 --> 00:34:48,501
she wanted him to be scared.
777
00:34:48,501 --> 00:34:51,501
That's why she posted
the letter under his door.
778
00:34:51,501 --> 00:34:53,381
- It was a threat.
- Where's the letter?
779
00:34:53,381 --> 00:34:55,621
She took it from Anthony's room.
780
00:34:55,621 --> 00:34:59,421
Think about it. Izzy's reaction
to seeing the body
781
00:34:59,421 --> 00:35:02,701
was to run upstairs
to the bathroom. Why?
782
00:35:02,701 --> 00:35:04,381
There's a toilet by the kitchen.
783
00:35:04,381 --> 00:35:07,621
She couldn't risk
you finding it in the house.
784
00:35:07,621 --> 00:35:09,901
Didn't it seem strange that
she went to take out the bins
785
00:35:09,901 --> 00:35:12,741
during a storm? You'd wait
until later, wouldn't you?
786
00:35:12,741 --> 00:35:17,061
Unless you had to get rid
of something urgently.
787
00:35:17,061 --> 00:35:18,981
Why would I kill him?
It makes no sense.
788
00:35:18,981 --> 00:35:20,581
A lot of things make no sense.
789
00:35:20,581 --> 00:35:22,501
Like why you lied your way
into a waitressing job.
790
00:35:22,501 --> 00:35:24,701
You did it to get close
to Anthony, didn't you?
791
00:35:24,701 --> 00:35:26,941
- No.
- Yes. You tried to poison him,
792
00:35:26,941 --> 00:35:28,701
and when that didn't work,
you stabbed him.
793
00:35:28,701 --> 00:35:30,021
No! Why would I?
794
00:35:30,021 --> 00:35:32,421
Because he killed your mother.
795
00:35:33,381 --> 00:35:35,621
Mam's dead?!
796
00:35:35,621 --> 00:35:37,541
I spoke to her this morning!
797
00:35:37,541 --> 00:35:39,661
You're not Lorna Maddison's
daughter?
798
00:35:39,661 --> 00:35:41,901
No, my mam's called Trish.
799
00:35:41,901 --> 00:35:42,941
Are you sure?
800
00:35:42,941 --> 00:35:45,581
What, that she's alive
or that she's called Trish?
801
00:35:45,581 --> 00:35:48,701
I mean, I'm pretty sure on both
but I can ring her and check.
802
00:35:48,701 --> 00:35:50,421
Agh, damn!
803
00:35:51,581 --> 00:35:54,341
Wha...! I was really hoping
your mam was dead!
804
00:35:54,341 --> 00:35:56,941
Not in that way. But something about
you doesn't add up,
805
00:35:56,941 --> 00:35:58,901
so you better tell me
why you're really here now
806
00:35:58,901 --> 00:36:01,341
or I'm taking you down the station.
Now, let's start
807
00:36:01,341 --> 00:36:03,701
with why you put a letter
underneath Anthony's door.
808
00:36:05,421 --> 00:36:07,741
It wasn't a letter,
it was a headshot.
809
00:36:07,741 --> 00:36:10,741
She's an actress. She lied her way
here to get closer to Anthony -
810
00:36:10,741 --> 00:36:12,301
thought it would help
her career.
811
00:36:12,301 --> 00:36:13,821
Same as she thought you would.
812
00:36:13,821 --> 00:36:17,581
Ah, well, that's why she was
keen to talk about my process.
813
00:36:18,741 --> 00:36:20,421
That's a relief.
814
00:36:20,421 --> 00:36:22,301
I did worry she was flirting.
815
00:36:22,301 --> 00:36:24,541
With you? Ego much?
816
00:36:24,541 --> 00:36:29,141
As if she wants to see you in your
Speedos with all your danglage.
817
00:36:29,141 --> 00:36:31,901
It does take us back
to square one, though.
818
00:36:31,901 --> 00:36:34,061
I was sure she was the daughter.
819
00:36:34,061 --> 00:36:36,221
It did feel right.
820
00:36:36,221 --> 00:36:37,861
Emotionally.
821
00:36:37,861 --> 00:36:41,181
An obsessive needing revenge
for a loss, righting the past.
822
00:36:42,181 --> 00:36:43,501
Oh, Chapel...
823
00:36:46,221 --> 00:36:48,221
Chapel...
824
00:36:48,221 --> 00:36:50,061
Yes-s!
825
00:36:51,261 --> 00:36:53,821
Oh, you fool! It's obvious!
826
00:36:54,901 --> 00:36:56,701
It wasn't the daughter,
827
00:36:56,701 --> 00:36:58,981
but it was the daughter!
828
00:37:00,261 --> 00:37:03,261
Just once, please, make sense.
829
00:37:05,741 --> 00:37:09,061
The road has been cleared now
so you're all free to go...
830
00:37:09,061 --> 00:37:14,181
..once we've sorted out the little
matter of who killed Anthony.
831
00:37:14,181 --> 00:37:16,061
BILL CHUCKLES
832
00:37:16,061 --> 00:37:18,741
- Now...
- Wait, what?
833
00:37:18,741 --> 00:37:21,741
..this murder is, at its heart,
834
00:37:21,741 --> 00:37:24,941
about a woman called
Lorna Maddison - a young woman
835
00:37:24,941 --> 00:37:27,341
who died
because of Anthony Hart,
836
00:37:27,341 --> 00:37:31,221
18 years ago, driving
to collect his post.
837
00:37:31,221 --> 00:37:33,581
Hence the letter opener.
838
00:37:34,501 --> 00:37:37,461
- I really like the word "hence".
- I should use it more often.
839
00:37:37,461 --> 00:37:40,781
The letter opener was significant.
840
00:37:40,781 --> 00:37:42,901
Symbolic.
841
00:37:42,901 --> 00:37:44,381
Wasn't it, Dennis?
842
00:37:44,381 --> 00:37:46,861
BILL GASPS
No way!
843
00:37:46,861 --> 00:37:50,901
You were the big inconsistency
from the start.
844
00:37:50,901 --> 00:37:53,221
The huge fan of Phoenix
845
00:37:53,221 --> 00:37:55,541
who wasn't interested
in the show.
846
00:37:55,541 --> 00:37:57,381
I told you, I liked it
847
00:37:57,381 --> 00:37:59,301
because me and my daughter
were into it.
848
00:37:59,301 --> 00:38:01,461
Your daughter. Yes.
849
00:38:01,461 --> 00:38:04,061
You were telling the truth there.
850
00:38:04,061 --> 00:38:06,581
I could tell
how much you miss her.
851
00:38:06,581 --> 00:38:09,461
But there'd been no
falling-out between you.
852
00:38:09,461 --> 00:38:12,581
You'd do anything
to see your daughter again...
853
00:38:13,661 --> 00:38:15,941
..but you can't.
854
00:38:15,941 --> 00:38:17,581
Because Lorna is dead.
855
00:38:18,741 --> 00:38:21,141
The only genuine emotion
you showed
856
00:38:21,141 --> 00:38:23,421
was when you saw Anthony
shouting at Izzy -
857
00:38:23,421 --> 00:38:25,261
seeing him push around
a young woman
858
00:38:25,261 --> 00:38:27,941
the way he'd pushed
your daughter around.
859
00:38:27,941 --> 00:38:29,701
Do you deny it, Dennis?
860
00:38:34,101 --> 00:38:36,301
That man...
861
00:38:36,301 --> 00:38:39,261
Maybe he wasn't in the car...
862
00:38:39,261 --> 00:38:40,501
..but he killed my girl.
863
00:38:41,861 --> 00:38:44,061
Every time I saw his smug face
on the telly,
864
00:38:44,061 --> 00:38:45,701
this thing grew inside me.
865
00:38:45,701 --> 00:38:47,941
I knew I'd have to finish
him off one day.
866
00:38:47,941 --> 00:38:49,981
Just had to find out
how to get to him.
867
00:38:49,981 --> 00:38:52,061
You famous people
are really cagey
868
00:38:52,061 --> 00:38:53,941
about your whereabouts
and that.
869
00:38:53,941 --> 00:38:56,381
Well, quite wisely,
in your case.
870
00:38:56,381 --> 00:38:59,861
Then I saw the ad for this.
Couldn't believe my luck.
871
00:38:59,861 --> 00:39:02,541
First thing I thought
of was the letter opener.
872
00:39:04,341 --> 00:39:06,461
Seemed fitting.
873
00:39:06,461 --> 00:39:09,141
"Here's your mail."
874
00:39:09,141 --> 00:39:12,781
I'd snuck off and changed
the place cards earlier.
875
00:39:12,781 --> 00:39:14,901
Said I needed the loo.
876
00:39:14,901 --> 00:39:18,061
In actual fact, I've got
the prostate of a 25-year-old.
877
00:39:19,061 --> 00:39:21,021
Then I came down before lunch.
878
00:39:21,021 --> 00:39:23,941
Asked for an autograph
for my little girl.
879
00:39:23,941 --> 00:39:25,581
He asked me her name.
880
00:39:25,581 --> 00:39:27,261
I told him -
881
00:39:27,261 --> 00:39:29,141
Lorna Maddison.
882
00:39:34,701 --> 00:39:36,661
They were the last words
he heard.
883
00:39:38,301 --> 00:39:39,821
You killed my dad?
884
00:39:41,901 --> 00:39:43,901
Saved you the job in the end.
885
00:39:46,021 --> 00:39:47,541
What?
886
00:39:47,541 --> 00:39:50,621
You'd already started your plan
to kill your dad.
887
00:39:50,621 --> 00:39:53,021
Poisoning him with brake fluid
in the margarita.
888
00:39:53,021 --> 00:39:54,101
BILL GASPS
889
00:39:54,101 --> 00:39:56,261
I told you I know how
to make cocktails!
890
00:39:56,261 --> 00:39:57,861
Owen wouldn't murder
his father.
891
00:39:57,861 --> 00:40:01,261
He had to. Anthony had threatened
to cut him off.
892
00:40:01,261 --> 00:40:03,021
Good work, Detective.
893
00:40:03,021 --> 00:40:04,221
- I completely missed that.
- Mm.
894
00:40:04,221 --> 00:40:06,421
This is absurd.
There's no evidence.
895
00:40:06,421 --> 00:40:09,861
The tequila bottle. It's empty,
but there'll be traces.
896
00:40:14,221 --> 00:40:16,141
LAUGHS NERVOUSLY
Yeah, OK...
897
00:40:16,141 --> 00:40:18,261
Yeah, you got me.
That's very good.
898
00:40:18,261 --> 00:40:20,741
Mm, yeah.
When I saw him at the table,
899
00:40:20,741 --> 00:40:23,501
the tears were real.
I was so relieved.
900
00:40:23,501 --> 00:40:25,421
Thank you, Dennis.
901
00:40:25,421 --> 00:40:29,701
Thanks to you, I walk free,
and inherit everything, so...
902
00:40:29,701 --> 00:40:33,221
Yeah. No, you're still going
to be arrested.
903
00:40:33,221 --> 00:40:35,341
It's still attempted murder.
904
00:40:35,341 --> 00:40:37,101
What?!
905
00:40:37,101 --> 00:40:38,381
No.
906
00:40:38,381 --> 00:40:41,781
Please, no. Um...
It-It was a joke.
907
00:40:41,781 --> 00:40:43,781
Er, doesn't grief do that
to some people?
908
00:40:43,781 --> 00:40:45,581
Gallows humour? No?
909
00:40:45,581 --> 00:40:48,381
Oh, come on, it wasn't
even enough poison to kill him.
910
00:40:48,381 --> 00:40:50,821
It would've taken me weeks.
911
00:40:50,821 --> 00:40:52,541
A good lawyer will get me off.
912
00:40:52,541 --> 00:40:54,861
And how are you going
to afford a good lawyer?
913
00:40:54,861 --> 00:40:55,981
SIREN APPROACHES
914
00:40:55,981 --> 00:40:57,781
Um... Oh, Aunt Hel, maybe you...
915
00:40:57,781 --> 00:41:01,701
You little shit. You'll never
receive a penny from me again.
916
00:41:01,701 --> 00:41:03,181
That'll be your ride, boys.
917
00:41:05,701 --> 00:41:09,101
We can come to an arrangement -
me and you?
918
00:41:09,101 --> 00:41:12,701
A mutual arrangement?
Backs get scratched?
919
00:41:12,701 --> 00:41:14,861
A bribe - there,
I can't be any clearer.
920
00:41:14,861 --> 00:41:16,421
Watch the shirt!
921
00:41:16,421 --> 00:41:18,181
There you go, Chaudhry.
Didn't miss out
922
00:41:18,181 --> 00:41:20,261
on all the excitement
with your dead sheep.
923
00:41:20,261 --> 00:41:24,581
Didn't you hear? It wasn't a sheep
carcass at all. It was a human's.
924
00:41:24,581 --> 00:41:27,461
- What?!
- It'd had been
in the drain for years.
925
00:41:27,461 --> 00:41:29,141
Clarke wants us on it
straight away.
926
00:41:29,141 --> 00:41:30,981
I'll see you
back at the station, all right?
927
00:41:30,981 --> 00:41:32,741
OK, all right.
ENGINE STARTS
928
00:41:33,861 --> 00:41:37,021
Er, I-I need to head
straight down to the station.
929
00:41:37,021 --> 00:41:38,781
What, in your car?
930
00:41:38,781 --> 00:41:40,101
You going to make it?
931
00:41:40,101 --> 00:41:43,461
Oh, I hope so,
but...maybe you are right.
932
00:41:43,461 --> 00:41:46,341
Maybe I do need to start
thinking about...
933
00:41:46,341 --> 00:41:48,701
..maybe thinking about...
934
00:41:48,701 --> 00:41:50,301
..letting it go.
935
00:41:50,301 --> 00:41:53,741
Well, you don't want to be
stuck in the past, like Dennis.
936
00:41:53,741 --> 00:41:56,341
Be sure to give us
a good review on Tripadvisor.
937
00:41:56,341 --> 00:41:59,461
Oh, that's for sure!
We had a great time. Thanks.
938
00:41:59,461 --> 00:42:02,141
Johnny? You're not going?
939
00:42:02,141 --> 00:42:05,421
Yeah, I'd better get back.
Yeah.
940
00:42:05,421 --> 00:42:07,501
Helena, look, um,
941
00:42:07,501 --> 00:42:09,941
if you're not, er, preoccupied
942
00:42:09,941 --> 00:42:12,301
in doing, you know, with the...
943
00:42:12,301 --> 00:42:14,581
Are you trying to...ask me out?
944
00:42:14,581 --> 00:42:17,021
I think I am. Yeah.
945
00:42:17,021 --> 00:42:18,701
Dinner?
946
00:42:18,701 --> 00:42:20,301
Talk about old times?
947
00:42:21,301 --> 00:42:23,221
Maybe make some new times?
948
00:42:23,221 --> 00:42:27,061
Yes, yes, I'd...I'd love that.
949
00:42:27,061 --> 00:42:29,621
Right, excellent.
950
00:42:29,621 --> 00:42:31,261
Great.
951
00:42:31,261 --> 00:42:32,701
Lovely.
952
00:42:32,701 --> 00:42:35,141
Oh, Johnny Chapel,
you've got me all flustered.
953
00:42:36,941 --> 00:42:38,941
BILL CHUCKLES
954
00:42:38,941 --> 00:42:41,461
I can't believe
the vicar did it.
955
00:42:41,461 --> 00:42:43,901
We'll be booking again
for next year.
956
00:42:43,901 --> 00:42:46,141
Oh, before you go, John Chapel,
957
00:42:46,141 --> 00:42:49,581
can I get one more photo
of the supersleuths together?
958
00:42:49,581 --> 00:42:52,221
One more? You've been taking photos
this whole time?
959
00:42:52,221 --> 00:42:54,461
- Yeah.
- Er...
CAMERA CLICKS
960
00:42:54,461 --> 00:42:56,901
Please tell me you
haven't sent them to anyone?
961
00:42:56,901 --> 00:42:58,741
- Well, just our kids.
- The kids.
962
00:42:58,741 --> 00:43:00,861
You got quite the response
on social media.
963
00:43:00,861 --> 00:43:02,901
- Oh!
- Oh, God.
964
00:43:02,901 --> 00:43:05,341
No. No, no, no. Delete, delete.
965
00:43:05,341 --> 00:43:06,741
- Delete?
- Delete them all.
966
00:43:06,741 --> 00:43:08,261
All right.
Delete them all.
967
00:43:08,261 --> 00:43:10,541
- What's the matter?
- Er, I'm so fired.
968
00:43:10,541 --> 00:43:13,341
Ah... We're in the paper!
969
00:43:13,341 --> 00:43:16,501
"Washed-up actor"?
Well, this won't do!
970
00:43:16,501 --> 00:43:17,941
Ah...
971
00:43:17,941 --> 00:43:19,141
PHONE RINGS
972
00:43:19,141 --> 00:43:21,541
Oh, G... Clarke's calling me.
973
00:43:21,541 --> 00:43:23,061
I'm dead. I'm dead.
974
00:43:24,221 --> 00:43:26,061
- BREEZILY:
- Hi!
975
00:43:26,061 --> 00:43:31,061
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976
00:43:26,061 --> 00:43:36,061
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