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QUIETLY: "The air bites shrewdly.

"It is...very cold."

And...bring in the toxic cloud ghost.

Now wobble...

- ..and gentle hiss whisper... - SOFTLY: - ..Hamlet...

- CAST SOFTLY: Hamlet, Hamlet, Hamlet... - OK, Hamlet.

It's your father. But he's dead, so it must be a ghost.

- Huh! You're very surprised, and... - CAST SOFTLY: Hamlet, Hamlet...

"Huh! Angels and ministers of grace defend us..."

CAST SOFTLY: Hamlet, Hamlet...

We can't hear you, Ben, love.

Ah, yeah. It's all the racket with the metal sheet

and the toxic wobbling. Can we take five, please, Wendy?

Yeah, OK. OK, everyone, take a break!

And costumes in the basket if you've finished your fitting.

I don't know why I can't have a boilersuit, like the blokes.

- Oh. - It's a post-apocalyptic patriarchy.

It's Menna's vision.

Wendy!

I don't want to do it all loud and fake, like.

My Hamlet's got to be natural.

Like Marlon Brando or Danny Dyer. Real.

I get that, Ben, love, but we can't hear you.

Please, can we stick to how we've been doing it?

Why don't we check with Menna? She'll get it.

Director's vision and all.

Menna's in her office.

She was very clear she wanted a bit of shush.

We can't keep disturbing her every two minutes!

She deserves a rest.

She's given her life for this theatre.

Probable death by strangulation.

Slight petechiae in the eyes, and her lips are swollen.

Sharp indentation and bruising traversing the neck

suggests ligature rather than finger pressure.

I love it when you sound proper technical.

Anything on what was used?

Looks like a length of rope or cord.

Chaudhry! What do we know about the victim?

Menna Hughes. A retired headmistress, property developer

and bigwig in the community.

Runs the Hedd Wyn Theatre Group here.

- Well...ran. - Hmm.

A few of the actors were out at the local cafe,

so only some of them were here.

Theatre doors were open, so we can't rule out somebody

coming in off the street. Nobody claims to have seen anything,

but they could be lying. They are skilled actors.

I mean, one of them's been in Doctors.

Mm.

So, not much to go on.

Oh, hello.

Did you know about this?

From Menna's solicitor. She recently changed her will.

No, I had no idea.

But you were her assistant?

Yeah, but it's not like I did everything for Menna.

Just her diary, admin,

running rehearsals, washing the costumes,

- cleaning her house. - I hope she paid you well.

It would've been an insult if she'd paid me.

I got to bathe in her light.

- FALTERING: - She relied on me and now she's...

- Oh, oh... OK, erm... Yep. Do you...? - Thank you.

WENDY BLOWS NOSE LOUDLY, SOBS

Oh.

- Yeah... - Thank you.

I suppose you'll have to cancel the show now.

Oh, no, we can't do that.

- No? - We sold all the tickets! The money's going to charity,

providing theatre equipment to veterans.

Plus, this was Menna's dream.

Well, I don't know if THIS would've been.

- No, but Hamlet was. - Hmm. - Years she talked about tackling it.

If we cancelled it now, she would turn in her... Oh, God!

WENDY GASPS Oh, gosh, yeah. Big feelings.

- Can you? - Yeah. Oh, yeah.

WENDY CRIES Use this. You're welcome.

John Chapel! I was just, er...

..passing in the area and...

Yes, yes, the theatre director, Llanfydan.

Yeah, wondered when you were going to come.

Great! I'll just get the files from the car!

- And I've got your Bourbons in. - Ooh!

They were rehearsing a play at the time of the murder.

Hamlet.

Ah, the melancholy Dane.

"O, that this too, too solid flesh would melt. Thaw...

"And resolve itself into a dew!"

- You know Hamlet?! - Yeah!

- And I can read and write. Clever little me. - Oh.

Now, Wendy the assistant. Something's off there.

Menna basically had her running the company and her life for nothing.

I mean, what sort of a person

lets someone walk all over them like that?

Good question. Unrelated, but how are things

with your old friend? Still avoiding her?

Things with me and Rhiannon are complicated, OK?

You're not unlike Hamlet yourself, are you?

Riddled with indecision.

I'm not riddled with anything, thank you.

JOHN SCOFFS LOUDLY: Now, our thinking is,

it was somebody in the theatre company that did it.

- Ooh, let's have a look. - There you go.

"A stripped-down production

"combining Shakespearean text with contemporary idiom.

"Relocated to the last farm

"in a post-apocalyptic future Wales."

You know, I like the sound of this, Menna.

- She's pushing the boundaries. - Back to the case, please.

Right. All right, OK.

Well, you can assume that Menna had at least one enemy,

because they've put out an urgent call for Claudius.

- So? - It's the second-most important character in it.

Take it from me, I've played it twice.

Hamlet, once. Laertes... Old Hamlet...

And famously, Gertrude, in an all-male touring production.

Yeah, I think I've still got the lace bodice

around here somewhere.

I sense you want me to get on with it? Yeah, OK. Erm, right.

Well, this obviously meant a lot to Menna.

She wouldn't leave it so late to cast an important part.

Their Claudius must have left recently.

- Why? - And who? - Well, that's obvious, isn't it?

All their recent productions include Leonard Price. Oh, yeah.

He's got the eyes of a Claudius, yeah. Dilated, deceitful.

- Yes, Chapel. That's him! - Good. Well,

- I'm going to go and have a word with this Leonard Price. - Hmm.

JOHN CHUCKLES

You ever think you'd ever like to get back into acting?

Why did you pack it all in?

I just thought it was the right time to retire, all right?

But you were in your prime.

I mean, I get it, though.

Better to leave at the top, before you lose it.

Lose it?! Look...

..a good actor, a proper actor, doesn't lose it.

No, it's like riding a bike!

You know, one that you park every now and then.

Yeah, but your bike's been parked for over a decade.

Your chain's rusty, you need an oil.

And the less said about the seat, the better.

PANPIPE MUSIC BLARES - MAN: - Just a minute!

- All right? - I am, yeah.

But Menna Hughes isn't.

- DS Mallowan, Trefach CID. - You'd better come in.

MUSIC BLARES Sorry about the volume!

I find panpipes very soothing!

MUFFLED MUSIC CONTINUES Thanks! Can't stand panpipes.

They used to play them outside Lush when I worked there.

- God, can you believe it's 13 years since I worked at Lush? - Ah.

The delicate dance of time. HE CHUCKLES

Yeah. What's that smell? Is that hemp oil?

Sure. Hemp oil. Yeah.

Erm, you said you were here about Menna?

Yeah. She snuffed it.

I mean, er...she's dead.

- Murdered. - I know.

- Terrible. - You were in the Hedd Wyn Theatre Group with her?

Yeah, we started it together back in the day

when there were just a few of us wild-eyed dreamers.

- Why did you leave the group? - All things come to an end

and I'm not getting any younger.

HE CHUCKLES Nah!

You'd already signed up to play Claudius.

I, er...

I never could lie.

I blame my eyes, too expressive.

Menna and I fell out over Chester, my dog.

About a month ago, he nipped her.

And Menna, being Menna, got all dramatic about it

and said he'd taken an hanch out of her leg.

So, she chucked you out the group for that?

Worse! She reported me and Chester! Said he was dangerous,

and that I'd have to get him re-homed or put down!

And now he's gone.

She exerted her influence with the council.

Oh.

- I thought postmen didn't like doggies. - Well, I did.

I couldn't stomach being around Menna after that.

I do have to ask you, where were you on Saturday,

between 11.00 and 1.00?

Oh, that's an easy one. HE CHUCKLES

Same place I am every day after I finish my rounds -

surfing on Traeth Olaf. I'm what they call a silver surfer.

THEY CHUCKLE

There's a car park ticket on the van window.

Was there anybody else who might've had beef with Menna?

Well, there was all that business with her holiday lets.

Someone graffitied the walls

and took an angle grinder to the key safe boxes.

- There was Ben and Rowena, too. - From the theatre group? - Yes! Yes.

They were buying a house. Menna came in at the last minute

- and gazumped them! - "Gazumped."

I always think that word sounds really rude.

Like, "They're not just friends. I heard they were gazumping."

SHE LAUGHS

You've been a great help. I'll show myself out.

DOOR OPENS No! That's the toilet!

Yep! I actually do need to go to the toilet now anyway,

so, erm... Won't be a mo! DOOR CLOSES

So, Linda, you hear Hamlet come in.

Ketan, love, that's Polonius's cue to dive behind the arras

before Hamlet infects him with the bio-virus.

Do you mean like this? Ahhhhh!

Yes...

OK. Take five, everyone! Down time.

SHE MUNCHES ON FOOD Detective, can I help you?

Mm. Mm.

Sorry, mouthful of fish and chips.

God, I wish there were more murders by the sea.

I really love fish and chips. Ha-ha!

That sounds callous. Erm...

I'm looking for Ben and Rowena.

Oh, they're in the dressing room doing vocal warm-ups.

Huh! I'm in a flap, I am.

We've managed to cast a new Claudius,

and we've only landed ourselves a real actor!

I'm a real actor!

Sorry, Greg! Course you are, love.

GREG MUTTERS - WHISPERING: - He's not.

I mean an established actor. Yeah.

You probably recognise him, Detective.

He used to be very famous! THEY CHUCKLE

John Chapel?

He... He looks vaguely familiar.

What are you doing here, Mr Chapel? JOHN LAUGHS

Serendipity beckons, Officer. JANIE LAUGHS NERVOUSLY

What?

An urgent call went out for a Claudius, and coincidentally,

I've been considering a soft return to the stage.

And I thought this excellent little theatre...

..would be the perfect place to test out the waters.

- Oh! - Even though it's under such tragic circumstances. - Yes...

Yeah... Erm, can we have a little moment?

- Yeah. - Thanks.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Of course. WENDY LAUGHS

Jac! Careful with the toxic grain!

What can I do for you, Officer?

What the hell are you doing?

I answered their call for help.

I think I can still knock the dust off my Claudius.

I am THIS close to being fast-tracked to my dream job,

and you decide to put on a play with the suspects?

I thought I could be useful to the investigation.

I could be your eyes and ears within.

You can't be actively involved.

Oh, well... So, you want me to wait at home, do you?

For your visits? Until you need me?

- Like some disposable skivvy? - No!

WHISPERING: Not skivvy, you weirdo!

Like, I don't know...

- ..a computer. - Oh, great! Oh, so, what do you do

when you've finished with me, then? Unplug me?

Do you take out my hard drive? No, this is the best way for us

to get the bottom of this murder.

This is the best way for you to kill my career!

Well, it's hardly a great look for my career, is it?

Do you think I want to be here?

A regional amateur dramatic theatre company?

I did 11 years with the Royal Shakespeare Company,

for goodness' sake!

And I've told you, I am completely retired.

Oh, fine. You're here now anyway.

- I need to talk to Ben and Rowena. - I'll come with you.

Yes, just to observe. Yes.

But try and keep it quick, though, will you?

There's an awful lot to get through today.

So, how long till the...pfff?

Sorry, don't know why I mimed an explosion.

The... The birth. The baby.

A month.

I think he's had another growth spurt.

Wendy's going to have to take that costume out again.

I can't be trussed up like a chicken with a belt across my bump.

I don't care if I have to be the first Ophelia in a kaftan.

- Ah! - Not the first!

I saw a Hamlet set in '60s California once.

A very Manson-family vibe. It was bold but bloody awful.

Yup. Menna gazumped you, didn't she?

- She gave you a right gazumping. - Yeah. - No.

- It wasn't a big deal. - It was a very big deal.

We've been living on a caravan site for two years,

getting the cash together to buy our dream house.

Then Menna comes in and buys it.

It's actually a proper tidy static, not a caravan.

I've lived in far worse places.

I want a house, not somewhere I can cook bacon

whilst sat on the toilet.

I keep telling her to close the door, like.

BEN CHUCKLES You must have been angry.

- Livid. - Chill out.

I'm hormonal, I don't want to chill out!

BEN CLEARS HIS THROAT I wasn't angry with her.

Just...just more confused.

Well, now, this could be useful. Channel it into your Hamlet.

Confusion, indecision, yes...

Can we save the acting tips till after I've gone?!

Yeah. JANIE LAUGHS

I've known Menna since I was a kid. She was my headmistress.

So, her doing that, it was just...

..just a bit sly, you know?

"That one may smile, and smile, and be a villain."

Yeah, that's Hamlet on Gertrude. This is all brilliant subtext.

JANIE CHUCKLES Why do you think she did it?

What, marry Claudius? Well, there's the million-dollar question.

- Lots of people think... - Menna, not Gertrude!

Bigger issues going on here.

I don't know. She hadn't been herself lately.

And not just beating us to the house.

She proper yelled at Wendy in front of everyone

for not sending off some documents.

Yeah, me and Menna got on all right, but even I know

- she was a mare to Wendy... - Hmm.

..by taking advantage of her very nature.

Hello! Sorry, loves, but shall we get a shufti on with rehearsals?

- Erm... - Oh, yeah.

Act 1, Scene 2, please!

OK, so, keep an eye on Wendy and those two.

See what else you can find out.

Oh, you want the computer's help now, then?

Don't make me restore you to factory settings, OK?

I mean, the old rogue! We were completely outraged.

He slept through the entire first run,

then woke up and gave us the best notes

we've ever had in our lives.

It's good to have another professional actor in the group.

Er, Greg. I did a couple of eps of Doctors last year.

Teacher with shingles.

Of course!

I thought I knew you!

Lovely itch work.

Thanks, John.

Wendy, you were, er...?

- Menna was such a fan of yours. - Oh! - Your theatre work goes

way over my head, of course.

- You're not a fan of the theatre? - Oh, no, no! I'm obsessed!

It's just Menna always said that I didn't have what it took

for the serious stuff, so...I was put in charge of pantos.

Have you ever done panto?

- I've somehow...resisted the urge. - Ah. - Hmm.

You would make an excellent Widow Twankey.

Thank you. All sadnesses aside, of course, erm...

..you must be enjoying your new-found responsibilities.

Yeah, I mean...

It's great to be able to honour Menna's dream like this,

- but I'll probably fudge it up, so... - WENDY LAUGHS NERVOUSLY

You shouldn't put yourself down. You're really good at it.

THEY CHUCKLE - Oh... - Oh, sorry. - Yeah.

- Right, erm, better get on! - Yeah!

OK, so, er...

Why don't we get our new star guest

to do Claudius's confession?

- What, me? Now? - It'll be like our very own masterclass.

- One of the greats. - Well, yeah, erm...

Yeah... Just hold that thought for a moment.

JOHN MUTTERS You're an exciting company, yeah.

Right, trying new things.

I think I'm going to need some time to...

..to immerse myself in your style.

Well, you're all experienced actors, you understand.

As an experienced actor, I get that, actually.

OK, guys, let's move on. Yeah.

Right. OK, er...

Ben, let's go with your first soliloquy, and let's work on

- speaking up a tot, OK? - Right.

- QUIETLY: - "O, that this too solid flesh would melt, like...

"Thaw itself into a...

"..a..."

- Line! - Dew. - He's got it.

Menna dropped the vandalism case.

- She even came into the station in person. - Right.

Oh, that's all you've got?

Oh. Ah, wait a minute, I know what's going on.

Pretending that's all you've got,

and then you're going to tell me you know who did it.

- Love it. - Er... No. - No? - No.

Oh, that is a blow.

I was really hoping you'd have something tangible.

- This is all my fault, I suppose. - What do you mean, your fault?

I put too much pressure on you. Didn't stop to consider

that your previous cases might have been flukes.

- They weren't flukes! - It happens all the time. One-hit wonder.

I'm not a one-hit wonder! I'm a nonstop hit machine!

Call me Alan Hitmarsh

- because this is going to be another hit! - Hey, hey!

Something my old DCI used to tell me to motivate me -

"I like you, Clarke", he used to say.

"You don't get results, you sweat results."

- Oh, so, you've ALWAYS been a bit sweaty? - Mm.

What? No. No, no. In fact, I'm not sweaty.

Kel's got me a new roll-on, Barrier Reef.

No, what I'm saying is, work hard, get sweating!

OK.

Now, your old-school wrestlers, your Big Daddys,

your Giant Haystacks,

your Kendo Nagasakis, that was real combat.

Can we move this along?

Janie, you free? Someone here to report a vehicle theft.

Yeah, of course. Let me just take a few details.

- Hello. - Hi.

- Er, my car's been stolen. - Wow. Shame.

- Make, model? - Yeah, Tesla. Model 3.

- Ooh, very nice. - Shut up.

- Can you remember the registration? - Yeah, I can. It's SL19G...

Why don't I deal with this?

- Mm-hm? - Mm-hm.

This way, ma'am.

Thanks.

JANIE SQUEAKS

You've got the same plates as me mam.

These are your mum's plates.

She keeps bringing me meals round. Can you make her stop?

You can't stop that woman from delivering food.

She's like Christian Aid. Now, the case.

The only person I can see who stood to gain anything

from Menna dying is Wendy.

She went from being a gofer to running the theatre company.

Which she didn't want. Wendy idolised Menna.

She was happy to be her doormat.

Well, maybe she'd had enough and snapped.

The vandalism to Menna's houses, now, that is interesting.

It's probably disgruntled locals. It's not isolated to Menna.

You see it happening everywhere these days.

Yes, but she told the police to drop it.

Now, this is the same Menna

that had a good friend's dog taken away from them

and suggested it be put down...because of the rules?

Hmm. Well, maybe it was one of them annoying, yappy little dogs.

- Wait, that was weird. - What was?

Leonard still had the dog lead. You'd get rid of it, wouldn't you?

Unless...you used it to strangle Menna!

It's the right colour, it's a rope.

You need to focus less on objects, more on psychology.

Now, Rowena... I just can't figure her out.

I mean, why is she in the theatre group?

She's keeping an eye on Ben.

Yes, Chapel, yes, but why else?

OK, well, you should keep an eye on her.

Well, that could be tricky,

because I'm thinking of leaving the group.

What? Why?! You only just joined!

Well, it's not fair on them, is it?

I mean, I don't want to outshine them. You know, it's...

It'd be like entering a Rembrandt in a child's drawing competition.

No. Now Menna's gone, Leonard can come back

- and play Claudius. - You're just saying that

because you're scared that you've lost it.

No! No. No, it's just too amateurish.

We couldn't rehearse today with Gertrude

because Linda had a double shift at B&Q.

You can't leave until we've solved this case.

You are going back there, John Chapel.

- No, but I... - No buts. You're going.

- It's... - And don't sulk.

You look like an old baby.

Oi, Johnny Chaps! Chaps-o.

Tell me what you think of this. HE CLEARS THROAT

QUIETLY: "To be or not to be, like?

"That is the big question, you know..."

Can I stop you there?

I do worry that the audience might struggle to hear you.

- That's what I've been saying. - It's what Brando does!

Makes them lean in.

But Shakespeare's all about language, Ben.

Some of the most beautiful words ever uttered.

- Yeah, that's what gets on my nerves. - Hmm.

Not much sign of Leonard on any of these posters, is there?

Lots of you, though, Ben. THEY CHUCKLE

No offence to Leonard, but who's going to sell more tickets?

Some old stoner guy,

or this super-lush babe magnet?

Hey! Come on!

You've had plenty of time to immerse yourself

in our style now, Mr Chapel.

So, confession time, you naughty sausage!

- Come on! - Yeah... JOHN CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY

- Are you shitting yourself? - What?

No!

Not at all!

I am shitting myself slightly, yes.

That's so weird. You're, like, a proper actor.

I'm not nervous and I'm rubbish.

You can say no.

No! Rubbish? No, oh, not at all.

But I still love doing it. Oh, it takes me out my life.

I get to be someone else for a bit.

- It's just like an escape. - Yeah, I get that, of course.

Yeah, erm... But it's...a bit more complicated than that.

Is it? Or is it just a bunch of grown-ups dressing up

and mucking about?

BOTH CHUCKLE I suppose it is, yeah, ultimately.

So exciting!

How come there's no costumes?

I need to rehearse my quick change.

Oh! They're still round mine. What with all the hoo-ha,

I just haven't had a chance to wash them all yet.

Huh! Right, Claudius!

Mr Chapel!

Act 3, Scene 3.

Right, yeah, erm...

Oh.

"I like him not.

"Er, nor...

"Er, nor stands it safe with us

"to let his madness range!"

- There's no body! - No, spoons.

For the eye bags.

Now, preliminary reports are back on Menna Hughes.

- Cause of death? - Definitely strangulation.

- Any news on the weapon? - We managed to find microfibres.

It's definitely a rope. About 12mm wide, black.

Do you think it could be a dog lead?

Hmm. Maybe. Now, something interesting turned up.

- Drum roll. - Do I have to? - Yeah. - OK.

- Menna was already dying. - Huh!

Lymphoma cancer, spread to the spine.

Probably only had a few months left at the most.

Also means it wouldn't have taken much force to strangle her.

Your killer wouldn't need to be that strong.

- Now... - Hmm?

- ..how's my bags? - Oh, my God!

- That's amazing. - Innit? Spoons. - Wow!

"O, bosom black as death!

"That, struggling to be free, art more engaged!

"Help...angels...

"Make assay.

"Bow...

"..stubborn knees...

"..and heart with strings of steel,

"be soft as sinews of the newborn babe.

"All may be well."

That's how I would have done it, actually.

Fair dos, like. I mean, that was loud but well good.

- Oh. - I can't believe he's our Claudius!

I wish Menna could see it. She'd be over the moon.

I, er... I just need some air.

Is Ben all right?

You all right?

Menna loved you, didn't she, eh?

Front and centre of every poster.

Leading role in every production.

That was more than a director...

..proud of one of her company members.

She was your mother, wasn't she?

- No. - What?

She wasn't.

- She always looked out for me. - Yeah.

When I went into care, she was all over it.

- Even more than my foster parents, like. - So, emotionally,

you could say she was like your mother.

So, I was right, but let's not split hairs.

So, what happened, Ben?

You can hardly bear to talk about her.

It was me...all right?

I graffitied her houses.

I was so fuming, I just lost it.

That was meant to be our house.

I didn't think it would hurt Menna so much.

But Menna knew it was you.

She called off the police.

She wouldn't do that for anyone.

Just those she loved.

I just wish I could say sorry.

If you really want to make it up to her,

I think the play is probably the best way.

Shall we?

I don't know about you, but I'm gagging to get stuck in.

THEY CHUCKLE

- Back for two, everyone. - Oh, excellent work, Linda.

You know, I think your Gertrude is going to be revelatory.

Very original choices.

And the closet scene with Hamlet, oddly enhanced by your coughing fit.

Thank you, John. It just sort of came out of me. It felt great.

Yeah, all right, I'll follow you on. Janie! Ha-ha!

Oh, to what do we owe the pleasure? Mm!

- Ooh... - I need to have a word.

What, now? Ah. Can it wait?

No, because I'm investigating a murder.

All right, fair enough. What is it, then?

Menna was already dying.

Only had a few months to live.

She'd had treatment but it was a case of managing the end.

Well, that explains Hamlet! It's her swan song,

a reflection of her artistic capacities. Life, death...

Proper theatre, out on a high. Ro!

- Lovely work, darling. - Thanks, babe.

- I thought you were going to quit! - Quit? No, the show has to go on.

- Oh. I thought it was amateurish. - OK, it's amateur, yes.

But the clue's in the word, isn't it? Latin for "lover".

That's why people do this.

It's not for the careers or the awards or the fame.

It's vital to them. They have to do it because they love it.

Aww! Glad you got that out your system.

Now, I've been to see Menna's solicitor.

The new cottage she'd bought?

She was leaving it to Rowena and Ben.

- Had it all planned out. - Well, well.

Hardly the monster that we've been fed a portrait of.

And get this -

she was leaving everything else to one other person.

- You'll never guess who it is. - Wendy, obviously.

What?! Oh, that's so unfair!

Can't you at least, like, pretend like you don't know?

I'm sorry, but it's obvious

if you've been paying attention to her character.

She will continue to care for the theatre, her legacy.

- It puts Wendy in the frame. - Trust me, I understand Wendy.

She's a pure spirit. She'd be incapable of murder.

No, the only inconsistent thing

is the fact she neglected to wash the costumes.

The costumes...

What is it? You've glazed over.

Recognise this?

- Er, it's a rope tie for one of the costumes. - Mm.

It's also the weapon that was used to strangle Menna.

It was found in your washing machine. What was it doing there?

- That's where I wash the costumes. - Hmm. - Whoever killed Menna

- must have put it in with the rest. - Very convenient.

Getting rid of all the DNA. Let me put a theory to you.

A few weeks ago, Menna decides to change her will to this.

That's a sponsorship form for a 10K.

To this...

..leaving almost everything to her assistant.

Her assistant, who does all of her admin, sees this will.

Sorry, but I had no idea. Why would I kill Menna?

One, you had a massive financial motive.

Two, the weapon was in your house, and three...

OK, I've only got two, but they're a really good two!

- I didn't do it. - Why else would you put up with Menna

treating you the way she did?

Ordering you round, making you do stuff for her,

you apologetic people-pleaser...

That's just the way I am, OK?

I always have been! I may not be the most confident,

but we can't all be the star of the show, you know?

Some people like being in the background,

getting on with stuff, making stuff happen.

I like doing things for people! OK?!

Do you think it's easy working with actors?

I mean, I love them, but it's like herding cats.

So, you found a bit of costume in the washing machine of the person

who always does the costume wash? Woohoo!

I didn't kill her. I loved her, so...

..so blow you!

I'm sorry.

Good sweat, Mallowan, good sweat. Wendy'll crack soon.

- You watch. - If it was her. - The murder weapon in her house

and a financial motive?

And why else would she explode like that?

Because she wasn't a pushover, and she didn't want everyone

thinking that she was. She respected herself.

No, it's her.

Eh, this is a good day. A murder cleared up,

and Kel's making chicken pie for tea.

Eh, I might even buy a scratchcard on the way home.

HE CHUCKLES

- Look... - No, you listen.

- I didn't say listen. - Don't interrupt me, OK?

I'm not standing for this any more.

You might still blame me for what happened with Sian,

and that's your call, but it was a long time ago.

You made my life hell once,

you cannot come back and do it again.

I'm not just some 17-year-old girl that can be pushed around,

and I'm not going to avoid you and hide in my own town.

- You've been avoiding me? I've been avoiding you. - What?!

I thought you were angry at me, so I wanted to stay out of your way.

Oh, come off it! How come I keep seeing you everywhere I go?

I keep seeing you where I go!

You were in Co-op! I know you go to those

fancy farm shops. Co-op is my safe space.

Mam likes the Co-op-brand Bourbons.

Well, that checks out, because they are nice, actually!

The reason I have been staying out of your way,

is because, look, I get it, OK? God, you must hate me.

- I'd hate me. The way I treated you was awful. - Yes, it was!

- I should never have blamed you for Sian. - No, you shouldn't!

Sorry, I was expecting an argument, and I'm still full of adrenaline!

- So am I! - Maybe we should go for a drink sometime soon?

- OK, yeah, that would be really nice! - We could try Diablo's? - Yeah, fine!

Actually, that's a little bit...

- Yeah, fine! - Good!

Well, well done, you. And well done, Wendy.

Wendy has to be prime suspect,

but we didn't have enough to keep her.

It's not Wendy, I'm telling you.

You're just saying that because you want her free for the play.

No...

..but I admit

she has blossomed into a very accomplished director.

She's also blossomed into being absolutely minted

- now Menna's dead. - Wendy arranged Menna's diary,

so she must have known, from all the hospital appointments,

what was going on. Now, if she knew about the will,

she would also know that she wouldn't have to wait long.

The murder weapon was in her house!

Even though I was sure the dog lead was our weapon.

Still seems weird.

Why would Leonard keep it? PHONE RINGS

Chaudhry?

- CHAUDHRY OVER PHONE: - I've been looking into Leonard Price's alibi.

The car park ticket? Is it faked?

No, the ticket is real, but he can't have been surfing.

The sea was flat calm that day,

and there'd been a sewage release in the bay around Traeth Olaf.

Nobody was in the water that day.

You all right? You've got a very...

..deep cough. You might want to get that checked out.

DEEP VOICE: Yes. Thank you, Chaudhry.

LINE DISCONNECTS

JOHN COUGHS - Sorry. It was a chip. - OK.

When we get there, you stay in the car, all right?

- All right. - You're already tied in

with every other suspect in this case.

KNOCKING ON DOOR

- Ah. All right? - Not really.

You've been lying to me about where you were

when Menna Hughes was murdered. You weren't surfing, nobody was.

- So, tell me where you really were. - I'd rather not, if I'm honest.

- I think I can help. - Whoa! John Chapel.

- Yes. - I told you to stay in the car! - He didn't kill Menna.

And I know where he was. Think about it.

The lead.

For what other possible reason could he keep it?

Chester!

JANIE WHISTLES, DOG BARKS

Oh, ho-ho... LEONARD CHUCKLES

So, the panpipes were to cover his barking!

Yeah, I just couldn't get rid of my old pal.

Look at that face, huh? I was at the surf beach, though.

We've been driving all the way over there

for him to get his walks

so that word wouldn't get back to Menna.

Awww, you are a good boy, in't you?!

In't you? Awww! LEONARD CHUCKLES

Which one of you did it?

God, it would be good if one of you answered...

HIGH-PITCHED: .."It was me!"

Hmm, yes. Biscuit?

Oh, I shouldn't. All those fish and chips I've been having,

I don't know if there's any room in the inn.

- All right. - No, I didn't say no!

Just need to loosen my belt.

What is it?

I know who did it.

"I'll have grounds more relative than this.

"The play's the thing

"wherein I'll catch the conscience of the King."

- WHISPERING: - Stunning.

And bring up the toxic sheet...

Three, two, one... Pans!

PANS CLATTER

Sorry to interrupt! SINGLE PAN CLATTERS

OK, yep. In your own time! CLATTERING

CLATTERING STOPS

Ah, I'm afraid there's not going to be a rehearsal today.

MURMURING

- Or a show. - What?! Why?!

I have an agent coming.

Not with a main cast member being arrested for murder.

CONFUSED MURMURS

It's a shame - you all look brilliant in your costumes.

How's yours, Rowena? Comfortable with your bump?

Comfortable as I can be, I guess.

Certainly more comfortable than you were

when you were complaining about being trussed up like a chicken, Ro?

Your costume doesn't seem to have the belt any more.

Oh, yeah, I had noticed.

It's not there...

- ..because it's here. - Sorry, what scene is this?

Are you saying I killed Menna?

Look, I know I might have hated her for buying our house,

- but killing her, that's... - Your house?

Interesting. See, with Menna dead, it's set to become your house again.

She left it to you both in her will.

She wanted to make it the perfect family home...

..because she felt guilty...

..didn't she, Ben?

You what?

I've been doing a bit of digging,

looking into your social services file.

You were taken into care

after a concerned citizen raised the alarm.

BEN SCOFFS

Just cos I grew up in care, doesn't mean I killed Menna.

No. But she was the concerned citizen. Your headteacher.

Probably why she showed you such special attention.

She hadn't expected you to be separated from your family, Ben.

She felt guilty. It ate away at her.

Like shingles.

Even if that's true...

..right, that's the first I've heard of it.

I've never even seen my social services file.

I've never had the urge to look into it.

You didn't need to.

Menna came to you.

My guess is, is that you were helping Rowena with her costume

during the fitting when Menna called you into her office.

She knew she was dying, but she wanted to make things right.

She wanted your forgiveness, so she told you.

OK, this is absolute nonsense. There's no way Ben would hurt Menna.

- He thought the world of her! - BEN: - It's OK...

- No, she was like a mum to him. - BEN: - No, she weren't!

Oh... She wasn't, was she?

She was nothing like a mum to me.

My mum was like a mum to me

until Menna stuck her stupid oar in!

She told me everything. Said she'd done it for my benefit.

She said she did what was best for me.

But how would she know? I just wanted to shut her up.

I still had the rope.

It was only for a few seconds...

...then I came to my senses, like!

A few seconds was all it took.

Menna was already weakened by the cancer.

I didn't know!

I had to get out of there.

I had no idea what to do with the rope.

Then I saw Wendy with her basket...

...and I chucked it in there.

You killed Menna?

I didn't mean to, all right? I loved her.

My head was gone, Ro!

She took me from my family!

What about our family?

- BEN: - No...

Don't, please! SOBBING

Sorry, sorry, everyone. I couldn't get out on time.

I got stuck helping someone buy decking,

and it just spiralled.

What did I miss?

ROWENA WAILS

This is my last fish and chips for a while.

Mam keeps subtly sending me gym membership deals.

- You're not too gutted the play's been cancelled? - No, no.

Don't get me wrong, it's been nice to be around a theatre,

but I'm not acting again. I've done with it.

- I shall leave it to the happy amateurs. - That's a shame.

You could bring back Caesar,

you know, with a new young female assistant.

Sort of me-type. Ooh, played by Billie Piper.

- Lovely eyebrows. - No.

But I've offered to help out at the theatre.

Wendy's putting on The Importance Of Being Earnest.

I think I might workshop it for them a little bit.

- How's the group? - Shocked.

Wendy's been very good, though.

She's made sure the cottage still goes to Rowena.

That's good. It's not Rowena's fault that her fiance

went behind her back, started killing people.

- Oh, Rowena knew. - Hmm?

She didn't know she knew she knew, but she knew.

- Part of her costume goes missing, doesn't ask any questions? - Hmm.

And Ben's not a ruthless murderer, but there'd been sleepless nights.

I think she just did her best to ignore it,

hope it would go away.

- Well, that doesn't tend to work, does it? - No. - No.

Oh, well, I'm glad you got back into theatre.

I was actually thinking, if it's not too weird,

you might like to come to the theatre with me,

sort of celebrate clearing another case.

- Really? - Hmm.

I'd love that.

- What are we going to see? - Lion King.

What?! I'm not nine years old! I thought you meant serious theatre.

It IS serious theatre! It's Hamlet with lions!

I can always offer the ticket

to someone who isn't an ungrateful arse!

Sorry, it's fine. Sorry, no. It's, er... Yeah. Yeah.

Of course, I'd love to come.

- Love to, yeah. Can I have a chip? - Absolutely not!

Oh! You really are a food thief.

- I'm not! - You're always stealing... - CONVERSATION FADES

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