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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:15,557 --> 00:00:18,935 It is preposterous to think that 2 00:00:18,936 --> 00:00:23,565 others might be as interested in your own story as you are. 3 00:00:24,233 --> 00:00:29,905 Writing a memoir is a whole other level of navel-gazing. 4 00:00:30,781 --> 00:00:32,406 But here we are. 5 00:00:33,242 --> 00:00:37,245 Tonight, I'd like to try out some scenes from Surrender, 6 00:00:37,246 --> 00:00:39,872 me book what I wrote meself. 7 00:00:39,873 --> 00:00:46,046 The first one's a dramatic opening. Could have been a dramatic closing. 8 00:00:47,047 --> 00:00:47,881 See... 9 00:00:49,967 --> 00:00:53,053 I was born with an eccentric heart. 10 00:00:53,929 --> 00:00:55,513 In one of the chambers of my heart, 11 00:00:55,514 --> 00:00:59,768 where most people have three doors, I have two. 12 00:01:00,644 --> 00:01:07,442 Two swinging doors, which at Christmas 2016 were coming off their hinges. 13 00:01:07,943 --> 00:01:11,697 The aorta is your main artery, your lifeline. 14 00:01:12,656 --> 00:01:16,618 My aorta, after years of stress, has developed a blister. 15 00:01:17,369 --> 00:01:19,371 A blister that's about to burst, 16 00:01:20,163 --> 00:01:26,461 which will put me in the next life faster than I can say goodbye to this one. 17 00:01:27,629 --> 00:01:29,047 So here I am, 18 00:01:30,591 --> 00:01:34,303 Mount Sinai Hospital, New York City. 19 00:01:34,803 --> 00:01:38,932 Looking down on myself on the stainless steel. 20 00:01:39,933 --> 00:01:43,936 Hot blood is swirling, spilling, and making a mess, 21 00:01:43,937 --> 00:01:47,983 which is what blood does when it's not keeping you alive. 22 00:01:48,901 --> 00:01:51,987 Blood and air. Blood and guts. 23 00:01:52,613 --> 00:01:55,448 Blood and brains are required right now. 24 00:01:55,449 --> 00:02:02,539 The brains and the hands of the surgeon who is standing over me. 25 00:02:03,081 --> 00:02:05,374 The man is climbing up to my chest, 26 00:02:05,375 --> 00:02:12,299 wielding his blade with the combined forces of science and butchery. 27 00:02:12,799 --> 00:02:15,343 "Your man has a lot of firepower 28 00:02:15,344 --> 00:02:17,345 in that war chest of his." 29 00:02:17,346 --> 00:02:20,890 "We needed extra-strong wire to sew him up. 30 00:02:20,891 --> 00:02:27,356 He's probably at 130% of normal lung capacity for his age." 31 00:02:40,410 --> 00:02:43,705 Air is stamina. 32 00:02:45,332 --> 00:02:52,088 Air is the confidence to take on big challenges. 33 00:02:52,089 --> 00:02:56,259 Air is not the will to conquer Everest 34 00:02:56,260 --> 00:03:00,888 but the ability to endure the climb. 35 00:03:00,889 --> 00:03:05,561 And here I am now without it for the first time. 36 00:03:07,646 --> 00:03:09,022 Without breath. 37 00:03:09,773 --> 00:03:14,444 The names we give God. All breath. 38 00:03:15,112 --> 00:03:21,618 Jehovah. Allah. Yeshua. 39 00:03:22,536 --> 00:03:26,123 I'm without air, and I'm terrified. 40 00:03:27,708 --> 00:03:29,418 Because for the first time, 41 00:03:30,502 --> 00:03:34,965 I reach for Yeshua, 42 00:03:36,383 --> 00:03:39,595 and Yeshua is not there. 43 00:03:41,513 --> 00:03:46,685 It's an extraordinary thing to ask the silence to save you. 44 00:03:48,854 --> 00:03:50,647 To reveal itself to you. 45 00:03:52,441 --> 00:03:55,861 To discover if there's a face to that silence. 46 00:03:59,406 --> 00:04:01,200 But in this moment, 47 00:04:02,117 --> 00:04:05,495 God seems to have gone missing. 48 00:04:08,457 --> 00:04:09,666 Where am I? 49 00:04:12,336 --> 00:04:13,795 Without air. 50 00:04:15,172 --> 00:04:16,964 Without a prayer. 51 00:04:18,050 --> 00:04:20,636 Without an aria. 52 00:04:21,178 --> 00:04:26,308 How did I get here? 53 00:04:30,562 --> 00:04:32,773 New York, New York! 54 00:04:33,857 --> 00:04:39,696 74th and Broadway, let the Beacon light our way. 55 00:04:44,034 --> 00:04:46,244 Lights go down, it's dark 56 00:04:46,245 --> 00:04:49,914 The jungle is your head Can't rule your heart 57 00:04:49,915 --> 00:04:52,792 A feeling's so much stronger Than a thought 58 00:04:52,793 --> 00:04:54,085 Your eyes are wide 59 00:04:54,086 --> 00:04:56,295 And though your soul It can't be bought 60 00:04:56,296 --> 00:04:57,839 Your mind can wander 61 00:04:57,840 --> 00:05:00,424 Hello, hello 62 00:05:00,425 --> 00:05:01,509 Hola! 63 00:05:01,510 --> 00:05:04,346 I'm a place called Vertigo 64 00:05:05,514 --> 00:05:07,682 It's everything I wish I didn't know 65 00:05:07,683 --> 00:05:10,977 But you give me something 66 00:05:10,978 --> 00:05:14,940 I can feel 67 00:05:18,235 --> 00:05:20,528 The night is full of holes 68 00:05:20,529 --> 00:05:24,073 As bullets rip the sky Of ink with gold 69 00:05:24,074 --> 00:05:27,451 They sparkle as the boys Play rock and roll 70 00:05:27,452 --> 00:05:30,913 They know that they can't dance At least they know 71 00:05:30,914 --> 00:05:34,667 I can't stand the beats I'm asking for the cheque 72 00:05:34,668 --> 00:05:37,879 Girl with crimson nails Got Jesus 'round her neck 73 00:05:37,880 --> 00:05:41,425 Swinging to the music Swinging to the music 74 00:05:46,346 --> 00:05:48,514 Hello, hello 75 00:05:48,515 --> 00:05:49,807 Hola! 76 00:05:49,808 --> 00:05:51,894 I'm at a place called Vertigo 77 00:05:53,061 --> 00:05:55,897 It's everything I wish I didn't know 78 00:05:55,898 --> 00:05:58,983 But you give me something 79 00:05:58,984 --> 00:06:03,155 I can feel 80 00:06:06,074 --> 00:06:10,829 Feel 81 00:06:13,165 --> 00:06:16,376 All of this, all of this can be yours 82 00:06:17,044 --> 00:06:20,047 All of this, all of this can be yours 83 00:06:20,547 --> 00:06:23,549 All of this, all of this can be yours 84 00:06:23,550 --> 00:06:26,970 Just give me what I want And no one gets 85 00:06:29,306 --> 00:06:30,474 Hurt 86 00:06:36,480 --> 00:06:39,983 Yeah, thank you. I am still pretending that this is a book tour. 87 00:06:46,240 --> 00:06:47,241 Oh, yes. 88 00:06:49,201 --> 00:06:51,953 - Hola. - Hola! 89 00:06:51,954 --> 00:06:55,123 Welcome to my quarterman show. 90 00:06:56,667 --> 00:07:01,129 And might I say, this feels somewhat transgresivo 91 00:07:02,130 --> 00:07:04,924 to meet you here without my bandmates. 92 00:07:04,925 --> 00:07:09,178 A lot of you know when U2 go on tour, 93 00:07:09,179 --> 00:07:12,599 it can involve some outsize props. 94 00:07:14,351 --> 00:07:20,816 A giant claw, space stations, mirrorball lemons. 95 00:07:21,900 --> 00:07:25,070 Tonight, I have a table and chairs. 96 00:07:26,196 --> 00:07:30,157 And the Jacknife Lee ensemble 97 00:07:30,158 --> 00:07:34,704 featuring Kate Ellis on the cello and extraordinariness 98 00:07:34,705 --> 00:07:39,376 and Gemma Doherty on the harp and other heavenly voices. 99 00:07:40,043 --> 00:07:44,840 Now, turns out the most extraordinary thing about my life 100 00:07:45,340 --> 00:07:48,176 is the people I'm in relationships with. 101 00:07:48,177 --> 00:07:52,347 I met most of them the same week 102 00:07:52,931 --> 00:07:56,602 I began life with my wife, Ali. 103 00:07:57,102 --> 00:08:00,397 The same week I joined U2. 104 00:08:02,274 --> 00:08:04,568 That's right. Excuse me, darling. 105 00:08:05,277 --> 00:08:10,574 One week during high school, and my whole life sorted. 106 00:08:11,658 --> 00:08:12,492 Sort of. 107 00:08:14,411 --> 00:08:20,792 Alison Patricia Stewart had faith. Even more absurdly, faith in me. 108 00:08:21,293 --> 00:08:26,381 This 15-year-old girl not just suffered my demonic dreams, 109 00:08:26,965 --> 00:08:31,511 she encouraged her boyfriend, as he told anyone who would listen 110 00:08:31,512 --> 00:08:38,143 that his band were gonna be big when he felt so, so small. 111 00:08:39,269 --> 00:08:42,981 These are the tall tales of a short rock star. 112 00:08:56,203 --> 00:08:57,496 Yeah 113 00:08:58,622 --> 00:09:01,083 The more you see the less you know 114 00:09:02,042 --> 00:09:04,962 The less you find out as you grow 115 00:09:05,838 --> 00:09:10,551 I knew much more then than I do now 116 00:09:13,220 --> 00:09:16,264 Neon heart, DayGlo eyes 117 00:09:16,265 --> 00:09:19,308 A city lit by fireflies 118 00:09:19,309 --> 00:09:23,437 They were advertising in the skies 119 00:09:23,438 --> 00:09:25,732 For people like us 120 00:09:27,985 --> 00:09:33,991 And I miss you when you're not around 121 00:09:35,284 --> 00:09:41,456 I'm getting ready to leave the... building. 122 00:09:42,583 --> 00:09:46,378 Back then, I was dreaming about this future. 123 00:09:46,920 --> 00:09:47,921 It's so beautiful. 124 00:09:48,422 --> 00:09:52,134 Lately, I've been dreaming about the past. 125 00:09:53,010 --> 00:09:56,262 A past that might keep me from the present. 126 00:09:56,263 --> 00:10:00,057 Oh, you look so 127 00:10:00,058 --> 00:10:03,728 Beautiful tonight 128 00:10:03,729 --> 00:10:07,190 - Oh - You look so 129 00:10:07,191 --> 00:10:11,278 Beautiful tonight 130 00:10:12,529 --> 00:10:14,780 I see my mother scolding me. 131 00:10:14,781 --> 00:10:18,492 "You're making a show out of yourself. You're making a show out of yourself." 132 00:10:18,493 --> 00:10:21,205 But that's what I wanna do with my life. 133 00:10:21,747 --> 00:10:24,458 And the da, rolling his eyes on that one. 134 00:10:27,044 --> 00:10:30,129 My da was a Catholic. 135 00:10:30,130 --> 00:10:35,427 A Catholic who loved Protestant things like my mother. 136 00:10:36,220 --> 00:10:40,140 When they got married, his own family didn't turn up at the wedding. 137 00:10:40,849 --> 00:10:44,186 Ireland was an unforgiving place in those days, 138 00:10:44,686 --> 00:10:48,774 but Bob wasn't very concerned with the outside world. 139 00:10:55,948 --> 00:11:00,369 My father was a tenor. A really, really good one. 140 00:11:01,453 --> 00:11:03,371 He could move people with his singing. 141 00:11:03,372 --> 00:11:09,002 And to move people with music, you first have to be moved by it. 142 00:11:10,295 --> 00:11:14,715 I see my father standing in the living room of 10 Cedarwood Road 143 00:11:14,716 --> 00:11:20,429 in front of the stereo with two of my mother's knitting needles, 144 00:11:20,430 --> 00:11:25,310 conducting Beethoven, Mozart, Verdi. 145 00:11:26,562 --> 00:11:30,941 Right now, he's listening to La Traviata. 146 00:11:34,987 --> 00:11:40,533 On stage at Teatro di San Carlo, Sorrento. 147 00:11:40,534 --> 00:11:43,244 He's not precisely aware of the story, 148 00:11:43,245 --> 00:11:45,329 but he feels it, 149 00:11:45,330 --> 00:11:51,210 a father and son at odds, lovers cast away and returned. 150 00:11:51,211 --> 00:11:55,591 He senses the injustice of the human heart. 151 00:11:56,091 --> 00:11:59,011 His heart is broken by the music. 152 00:11:59,928 --> 00:12:01,053 I'll spend most of my life 153 00:12:01,054 --> 00:12:05,141 trying to figure out the opera playing inside my father's head. 154 00:12:05,142 --> 00:12:09,061 He doesn't really notice much else, 155 00:12:09,062 --> 00:12:14,651 least of all me, age ten, just staring up at him. 156 00:12:15,819 --> 00:12:21,741 Now, if you want your child to grow up to be a grandstanding stadium singer, 157 00:12:21,742 --> 00:12:23,993 there are a couple of ways to go about it. 158 00:12:23,994 --> 00:12:28,831 You can tell them they're gifted, they-- that the world needs to hear their voice. 159 00:12:28,832 --> 00:12:31,960 This is the Italian method. 160 00:12:33,003 --> 00:12:35,589 Or you can completely ignore them. 161 00:12:36,131 --> 00:12:40,844 This can be the Irish method, much more effective in my case. 162 00:12:41,512 --> 00:12:45,640 I craved my father's attention. 163 00:12:45,641 --> 00:12:49,478 I wanted him to think that I had music in me too. 164 00:12:50,312 --> 00:12:52,856 He didn't hear me, 165 00:12:53,565 --> 00:12:57,694 so I sang louder and louder. 166 00:12:58,403 --> 00:13:04,409 In fact, you could say I sang my way to right in front of you tonight. 167 00:13:06,620 --> 00:13:07,621 Thanks, Da. 168 00:13:09,039 --> 00:13:13,335 My father had some very good reasons for staying lost in his own world. 169 00:13:14,837 --> 00:13:18,589 I think we're gonna need some harp music for this next bit. 170 00:13:18,590 --> 00:13:20,175 It's the tragic part. 171 00:13:26,932 --> 00:13:30,352 My mother, Iris, died when I was 14. 172 00:13:31,645 --> 00:13:36,524 Last time I saw her alive was at her own father's funeral. 173 00:13:36,525 --> 00:13:39,527 This sounds almost too Irish, I know, 174 00:13:39,528 --> 00:13:43,782 but this is my story. I'm stuck with it. 175 00:13:45,534 --> 00:13:49,788 As my grandfather's casket was being lowered into the ground, 176 00:13:50,372 --> 00:13:51,747 my mother collapsed. 177 00:13:51,748 --> 00:13:58,547 I stood watching as my father and my older brother carried her to the car, 178 00:14:00,007 --> 00:14:04,678 drove her to the hospital, where she died of an aneurysm. 179 00:14:05,262 --> 00:14:06,263 It happens. 180 00:14:06,972 --> 00:14:10,100 I felt useless, so I prayed. 181 00:14:11,226 --> 00:14:17,191 My father's response to this tragedy was to never speak of her again. 182 00:14:18,567 --> 00:14:23,739 With Iris gone, our home at number 10 is becoming its own opera. 183 00:14:24,948 --> 00:14:26,115 I'm locked in a house 184 00:14:26,116 --> 00:14:31,663 where three men are living in rage and melancholy. 185 00:14:32,998 --> 00:14:38,253 A house where the name of our grief is never spoken. 186 00:14:39,546 --> 00:14:40,964 Iris. 187 00:14:41,798 --> 00:14:44,468 My mother's name is Iris. 188 00:14:46,345 --> 00:14:52,350 The house became a river of silence in which I might have drowned 189 00:14:52,351 --> 00:14:58,481 had my big brother, Norman, not thrown me a lifeline. 190 00:14:58,482 --> 00:15:01,735 He gave me a guitar, his guitar. 191 00:15:02,528 --> 00:15:06,990 A shield. A weapon. A confidant. 192 00:15:08,325 --> 00:15:11,203 Another voice to pray with. Music. 193 00:15:22,631 --> 00:15:25,259 I am jumping around the living room 194 00:15:26,927 --> 00:15:30,429 to the sound of the Ramones' Leave Home album. 195 00:15:30,430 --> 00:15:34,517 Songs so simple, and yet they capture how my life feels to me. 196 00:15:34,518 --> 00:15:40,941 Songs so simple that even I might be able to write one. 197 00:15:41,733 --> 00:15:47,989 It's May 10, 1978. Today is my 18th birthday. 198 00:15:47,990 --> 00:15:49,448 We don't do cakes. 199 00:15:49,449 --> 00:15:54,705 Instead, the da wants to talk to me about getting a job. 200 00:15:55,289 --> 00:15:56,706 A job. 201 00:15:56,707 --> 00:16:00,710 I know that if I could do something I love, 202 00:16:00,711 --> 00:16:03,671 I would never have to work a day in my life. 203 00:16:03,672 --> 00:16:06,800 But to do that, you have to be great at something, 204 00:16:07,759 --> 00:16:11,054 and I'm not great at something. I'm not great at anything. 205 00:16:12,389 --> 00:16:16,809 I'm smart enough to know I'm not smart enough. 206 00:16:16,810 --> 00:16:20,647 The Ramones are smart enough to play dumb. 207 00:16:21,398 --> 00:16:24,860 Maybe I need to listen to even more Ramones. 208 00:16:25,611 --> 00:16:30,782 This is the day I'm gonna write my very first proper rock-and-roll song. 209 00:16:31,700 --> 00:16:34,327 It will become U2's first single. It will save my life. 210 00:16:34,328 --> 00:16:35,996 It is called "Out of Control." 211 00:16:37,831 --> 00:16:43,836 Monday morning, 18 years of dawning 212 00:16:43,837 --> 00:16:46,548 I say how long 213 00:16:47,591 --> 00:16:49,593 Say how long 214 00:16:50,969 --> 00:16:53,930 It was one dull morning 215 00:16:53,931 --> 00:16:57,350 Woke the world with bawling 216 00:16:57,351 --> 00:16:59,561 I was so sad 217 00:17:00,812 --> 00:17:02,731 They were so glad 218 00:17:04,566 --> 00:17:08,110 Yeah, I had spirit and we had soul 219 00:17:08,111 --> 00:17:12,281 Even then I was out of control 220 00:17:19,790 --> 00:17:22,542 Hey, I can do this. 221 00:17:27,422 --> 00:17:29,049 Stories for 222 00:17:30,008 --> 00:17:34,471 "Drummer seeks musicians to form band." 223 00:17:35,472 --> 00:17:37,598 Stories for boys 224 00:17:37,599 --> 00:17:42,563 Let me introduce you to Larry Mullen Jr. 225 00:17:43,981 --> 00:17:49,861 Now, most people who enter the room with Larry Mullen find him striking 226 00:17:49,862 --> 00:17:54,991 in the sense that he is a stylish, good-looking member of the species, 227 00:17:54,992 --> 00:17:59,954 but also in the sense that he can be strikingly suspicious 228 00:17:59,955 --> 00:18:02,498 of you being in his gaze, 229 00:18:02,499 --> 00:18:05,126 of you being in the room, 230 00:18:05,127 --> 00:18:09,172 and perhaps, on a bad day, your reason for being anywhere at all. 231 00:18:09,173 --> 00:18:13,509 But when Larry loves people, he loves them completely, 232 00:18:13,510 --> 00:18:18,182 and I'm grateful to have become one of the beneficiaries of that love. 233 00:18:18,849 --> 00:18:21,350 Now, David Evans. 234 00:18:21,351 --> 00:18:27,815 Sometimes the name you're given at birth just isn't your real name, is it? 235 00:18:27,816 --> 00:18:31,903 David Evans was always the Edge. Always the Edge. 236 00:18:31,904 --> 00:18:37,241 1976, he was 15, a year younger than me. 237 00:18:37,242 --> 00:18:42,663 He was leaning up against the wall at Mount Temple Comprehensive, 238 00:18:42,664 --> 00:18:46,084 plucking a complicated guitar line. 239 00:18:46,793 --> 00:18:49,795 He was in class with Alison Stewart, my future wife, 240 00:18:49,796 --> 00:18:52,340 and it was said that they were the smartest in their year, 241 00:18:52,341 --> 00:18:57,721 that he had a crush on her, that they might have gone for walks. 242 00:18:58,722 --> 00:19:03,185 Decided right then, I was keeping an eye on this guitar genius. 243 00:19:03,810 --> 00:19:09,358 Now, let me introduce you to Adam Clayton, 244 00:19:11,443 --> 00:19:13,820 a true believer in rock and roll. 245 00:19:15,072 --> 00:19:19,451 Only one commandment, four strings are better than six. 246 00:19:20,494 --> 00:19:24,038 He had the style, the attitude, the ambition, 247 00:19:24,039 --> 00:19:27,333 only problem was he couldn't play, 248 00:19:27,334 --> 00:19:30,254 which wasn't a problem, as I couldn't sing. 249 00:19:32,381 --> 00:19:35,759 Stories for boys 250 00:19:42,975 --> 00:19:48,480 There's a place I go That isn't part of me 251 00:19:49,731 --> 00:19:55,445 Like a radio with no controls 252 00:19:56,154 --> 00:20:00,074 In my imagination 253 00:20:00,075 --> 00:20:04,872 There's only static and flow 254 00:20:05,581 --> 00:20:09,001 No yes or no 255 00:20:09,710 --> 00:20:13,130 The stories for boys 256 00:20:13,630 --> 00:20:16,717 Stories for boys 257 00:20:17,384 --> 00:20:20,679 Stories for boys 258 00:20:26,810 --> 00:20:31,607 U2's rehearsal room was a small cottage, 259 00:20:32,107 --> 00:20:36,569 backing onto a graveyard in north County Dublin. 260 00:20:36,570 --> 00:20:42,451 Same graveyard that my mother was buried in. We called it the Yellow House. 261 00:20:43,660 --> 00:20:50,000 Today, not for the first time, I've been screaming at my bandmates. 262 00:20:52,669 --> 00:20:58,966 Forget Ireland bursting into paramilitary flames. No, no. 263 00:20:58,967 --> 00:21:04,180 On this day, in the winter of 1978, 264 00:21:04,181 --> 00:21:08,559 the most pressing issue facing all of humanity 265 00:21:08,560 --> 00:21:13,439 is that this band are not being good enough musicians, 266 00:21:13,440 --> 00:21:15,692 as if I was. 267 00:21:16,818 --> 00:21:20,112 Trying to explain to them how excited I am 268 00:21:20,113 --> 00:21:23,908 about the new Public Image Ltd song. 269 00:21:23,909 --> 00:21:28,454 A great song, I explain, like I know, 270 00:21:28,455 --> 00:21:32,793 can be written on two strings over two chords. 271 00:21:33,418 --> 00:21:38,674 I'm trying to get Edge to make the sound of an electric drill into your brain, 272 00:21:39,550 --> 00:21:43,929 like a chainsaw through the carcass of the past. 273 00:21:46,098 --> 00:21:48,267 Edge is not following the invective. 274 00:21:48,851 --> 00:21:53,896 In fact, Edge is losing patience, and I'm becoming even more invected, 275 00:21:53,897 --> 00:21:59,945 so invected that I grab his Gibson Explorer from him 276 00:22:01,405 --> 00:22:03,824 and wrap it around my own neck 277 00:22:04,408 --> 00:22:08,287 to start making a dangerous squeal of a sound. 278 00:22:14,543 --> 00:22:19,339 "Go on. Go on," says Edge. "Keep it coming. You're nearly there." 279 00:22:20,632 --> 00:22:22,050 You like it? 280 00:22:22,676 --> 00:22:28,056 "I'm not sure I like it, but it does sound like a dentist drilling your brain. 281 00:22:29,224 --> 00:22:33,812 Here, let me take it. Let me see if I can take it somewhere." 282 00:22:34,938 --> 00:22:39,400 In this ego-filled and egoless moment, 283 00:22:39,401 --> 00:22:40,861 a song is forming. 284 00:22:42,029 --> 00:22:44,655 A song that will be called "I Will Follow." 285 00:22:44,656 --> 00:22:48,159 If you walk away, walk away. Walk away, walk away. 286 00:22:48,160 --> 00:22:51,913 It's like a rhythm hook. You know, like a wah-wah pedal. 287 00:22:51,914 --> 00:22:55,333 Walk away, walk away, walk away. I will follow. 288 00:22:55,334 --> 00:22:58,336 Edge is turning my graffiti 289 00:22:58,337 --> 00:23:02,423 into some Raphael Mother and fucking Child, 290 00:23:02,424 --> 00:23:07,136 and Larry and Adam are burning down the gallery. 291 00:23:07,137 --> 00:23:08,429 That's right. 292 00:23:08,430 --> 00:23:13,477 Come on, let's find the thing that we can do that no one else can do. 293 00:23:14,102 --> 00:23:16,979 Adam, you can do that. 294 00:23:16,980 --> 00:23:18,856 We can do this thing. 295 00:23:18,857 --> 00:23:20,900 Edge, we can do this thing. 296 00:23:20,901 --> 00:23:25,489 Adam, Larry, if you walk away, walk away. 297 00:23:26,073 --> 00:23:31,912 If you walk away, walk away. If you walk away, walk away. 298 00:23:38,502 --> 00:23:41,504 On the drums, Larry Mullen. 299 00:23:41,505 --> 00:23:44,423 On the bass, Adam Clayton, Edge. 300 00:23:44,424 --> 00:23:47,094 "I Will Follow." 301 00:23:52,140 --> 00:23:58,021 Oh, man. Sorry about that, Edge, Larry, Adam. 302 00:23:59,481 --> 00:24:02,401 What a complete fucking eejit I was. 303 00:24:03,235 --> 00:24:04,444 I'm working on it though. 304 00:24:07,948 --> 00:24:09,449 Truth is you're... 305 00:24:11,577 --> 00:24:13,745 you're really great. 306 00:24:17,040 --> 00:24:22,921 But what no one in that rehearsal room, including me, had thought about 307 00:24:24,047 --> 00:24:26,216 was Iris Hewson resting... 308 00:24:28,552 --> 00:24:30,929 not a hundred yards from where we were playing. 309 00:24:32,264 --> 00:24:34,932 In all the time we rehearsed in the Yellow House, 310 00:24:34,933 --> 00:24:37,728 I never thought about her. 311 00:24:38,562 --> 00:24:40,689 Never once visited her grave. 312 00:24:41,857 --> 00:24:45,360 It wasn't like she was dead. 313 00:24:45,861 --> 00:24:47,571 It was worse. 314 00:24:48,197 --> 00:24:53,869 We disappeared her, but Iris would not be denied. 315 00:24:54,786 --> 00:24:57,039 No, not in the music. 316 00:25:02,711 --> 00:25:04,296 Iris standing in the hall. 317 00:25:06,089 --> 00:25:08,133 She tells me I can do it all. 318 00:25:11,595 --> 00:25:13,055 Don't fear the world 319 00:25:14,515 --> 00:25:15,516 it isn't there. 320 00:25:16,683 --> 00:25:18,143 Iris playing on the strand. 321 00:25:20,270 --> 00:25:22,231 She buries the boy 322 00:25:22,773 --> 00:25:24,233 beneath the sand. 323 00:25:25,859 --> 00:25:27,569 Iris says that I will be 324 00:25:29,613 --> 00:25:30,822 the death of her. 325 00:25:33,075 --> 00:25:35,494 But it wasn't fucking me. 326 00:25:42,167 --> 00:25:47,755 Let me tell you something about the geometry 327 00:25:47,756 --> 00:25:50,967 and the geography of the Irish mind. 328 00:25:50,968 --> 00:25:55,973 The Irish mind is best understood as being like an Irish pub. 329 00:25:56,473 --> 00:26:01,227 You go to forget, but in the end, you're drowning in memories, 330 00:26:01,228 --> 00:26:04,022 and salt-and-vinegar crisps... 331 00:26:05,065 --> 00:26:06,316 and black stuff. 332 00:26:07,067 --> 00:26:09,819 Finnegan's pub is not just my local, 333 00:26:09,820 --> 00:26:14,073 it is its own country with its own laws and customs. 334 00:26:14,074 --> 00:26:17,743 It is the domain of Dan Finnegan and his sons. 335 00:26:17,744 --> 00:26:22,373 It's a constitutional monarchy, with Dan head of state 336 00:26:22,374 --> 00:26:24,793 and his sons running the government. 337 00:26:25,294 --> 00:26:29,088 There is a code, a strictness, a reverence for tradition. 338 00:26:29,089 --> 00:26:32,092 Indeed, a respect for opera 339 00:26:32,593 --> 00:26:36,972 and for the kind of man who might know how to wear tweed, 340 00:26:37,556 --> 00:26:38,974 like my father, Bob. 341 00:26:39,808 --> 00:26:44,771 Now, within the nation of Finnegan's-- Like my father, Bob. 342 00:26:45,689 --> 00:26:52,153 Now, within the nation of Finnegan's there is a small Italian consulate, 343 00:26:52,154 --> 00:26:53,447 the Sorrento Lounge 344 00:26:54,031 --> 00:26:57,867 which is where, on a Sunday, I would meet my father for a drink. 345 00:26:57,868 --> 00:26:59,577 I would order a pint. 346 00:26:59,578 --> 00:27:03,539 He, the Catholic, would order Black Bush, a Protestant whiskey. 347 00:27:03,540 --> 00:27:09,921 Already a subtle signal that Brendan Robert Hewson was his own man 348 00:27:09,922 --> 00:27:15,260 and one with a great opening line every single time. 349 00:27:19,223 --> 00:27:23,769 "Anything strange or startling?" 350 00:27:24,353 --> 00:27:26,479 Now, by strange or startling, 351 00:27:26,480 --> 00:27:30,150 he was not interested in the riotous life of a rock-and-roll singer. 352 00:27:30,734 --> 00:27:34,154 Mostly we sat in silence. 353 00:27:55,968 --> 00:27:57,261 I try to impress him. 354 00:27:58,220 --> 00:28:02,723 How about Luciano Pavarotti calling the house? 355 00:28:02,724 --> 00:28:05,936 You consider that strange or startling? 356 00:28:06,770 --> 00:28:09,648 "Startling, that's obvious. 357 00:28:10,482 --> 00:28:16,029 Strange? Yeah. Why would a great tenor be calling you? No offense." 358 00:28:16,989 --> 00:28:23,328 None taken. Actually, he's looking for a song. 359 00:28:24,204 --> 00:28:26,789 "Did he dial the wrong number?" 360 00:28:26,790 --> 00:28:30,918 No. He wants me, 361 00:28:30,919 --> 00:28:33,880 with a little help from Edge, to write him a song. Yeah. 362 00:28:33,881 --> 00:28:37,258 Not Gilbert and Sullivan or Rodgers and Hammerstein. 363 00:28:37,259 --> 00:28:41,138 Me, B-O-N-O, Paul. 364 00:28:43,765 --> 00:28:49,730 "You? A baritone who thinks he's a tenor?" 365 00:28:51,148 --> 00:28:52,149 Me. 366 00:28:52,649 --> 00:28:58,238 Pavarotti wants me to write him a song. Now who's the fucking eejit? 367 00:29:01,992 --> 00:29:02,993 "He is." 368 00:29:06,538 --> 00:29:09,124 Gloria 369 00:29:11,251 --> 00:29:15,631 In te domine 370 00:29:18,175 --> 00:29:19,927 Gloria 371 00:29:20,636 --> 00:29:25,932 Exultate 372 00:29:25,933 --> 00:29:30,853 Mount Temple Comprehensive School was a nondenominational, 373 00:29:30,854 --> 00:29:33,481 coeducational experiment. 374 00:29:33,482 --> 00:29:38,861 In a country that was close to civil war along sectarian lines, 375 00:29:38,862 --> 00:29:42,991 we had Catholics and Protestants in the same class. 376 00:29:44,117 --> 00:29:46,702 You were encouraged to be yourself, 377 00:29:46,703 --> 00:29:51,123 to be creative, to wear your own clothes, 378 00:29:51,124 --> 00:29:55,545 and there were girls. 379 00:29:55,546 --> 00:29:58,590 Also, wearing their own clothes. 380 00:29:59,466 --> 00:30:03,594 Ironically, amid this freedom from religion, 381 00:30:03,595 --> 00:30:05,096 we found ourselves getting religion. 382 00:30:05,097 --> 00:30:09,351 We got close to a group of Christian radicals called "Shalom." 383 00:30:10,227 --> 00:30:15,565 They figured all the established churches had not just gotten away from Jesus, 384 00:30:15,566 --> 00:30:19,194 but they had got in the way of Jesus. 385 00:30:20,654 --> 00:30:22,405 As U2 started to get popular, 386 00:30:22,406 --> 00:30:28,077 our first-century Christian brethren began suggesting that our music was frivolous 387 00:30:28,078 --> 00:30:30,204 and self-flattering. 388 00:30:30,205 --> 00:30:32,708 In other words, fun. 389 00:30:34,501 --> 00:30:39,464 We asked the question, "Can we not change the world and have fun?" 390 00:30:41,425 --> 00:30:47,973 "No. You must choose between this world and the next." 391 00:30:50,350 --> 00:30:56,230 Eventually, it became too much for us, particularly Edge. 392 00:30:56,231 --> 00:31:00,860 He couldn't live with the tension between being a disciple of Jesus 393 00:31:00,861 --> 00:31:04,405 and an apostle of Joey Ramone. 394 00:31:04,406 --> 00:31:08,493 He eventually decided to leave the band. 395 00:31:09,786 --> 00:31:11,580 I felt conflicted too. 396 00:31:12,206 --> 00:31:16,209 I had no interest in carrying on in U2 without Edge. 397 00:31:16,210 --> 00:31:20,088 Larry sympathized with us both. 398 00:31:20,881 --> 00:31:23,841 Adam did not. 399 00:31:23,842 --> 00:31:30,557 One album and done, like the Sex Pistols. 400 00:31:34,102 --> 00:31:38,440 Now we just had to tell our manager. 401 00:31:39,358 --> 00:31:41,944 Have I told you about Paul McGuinness? 402 00:31:42,945 --> 00:31:46,572 Paul McGuinness, the Winston Churchill of Rock. 403 00:31:46,573 --> 00:31:48,574 I mean, he went to war for U2. 404 00:31:48,575 --> 00:31:50,910 He had just taken us once around the world, 405 00:31:50,911 --> 00:31:54,622 so we really, really weren't looking forward 406 00:31:54,623 --> 00:32:01,463 to telling him that we were breaking up his baby band just as they hit puberty. 407 00:32:02,130 --> 00:32:05,384 But he heard us out. 408 00:32:06,051 --> 00:32:07,678 There was a pause, 409 00:32:08,804 --> 00:32:15,352 some fidgeting, a slap on the face. His. 410 00:32:16,019 --> 00:32:17,395 And then came, 411 00:32:17,396 --> 00:32:23,777 "Am I to gather from this that you've been talking to God? 412 00:32:26,029 --> 00:32:31,784 Well, maybe the next time you ring God, 413 00:32:31,785 --> 00:32:35,705 you might ask him, or her, 414 00:32:35,706 --> 00:32:40,960 if it's okay for your representative on Earth-- i.e., me-- 415 00:32:40,961 --> 00:32:43,463 to renege on a legal contract. 416 00:32:45,132 --> 00:32:50,720 Do you think God would have you break a legal contract, is my question. 417 00:32:50,721 --> 00:32:55,433 A contract that I have signed on your behalf to go on tour. 418 00:32:55,434 --> 00:32:58,145 What sort of a God is that?" 419 00:33:01,023 --> 00:33:03,859 Hell of a negotiator, Paul McGuinness. 420 00:33:04,776 --> 00:33:07,987 It wouldn't be the first time we'd put words in God's mouth. 421 00:33:07,988 --> 00:33:10,198 The tour would indeed go ahead. 422 00:33:10,199 --> 00:33:12,868 And I was so heightened, 423 00:33:14,203 --> 00:33:20,917 I convinced my 21-year-old girlfriend to get married. 424 00:33:20,918 --> 00:33:24,588 Unbelievably, she said yes. 425 00:33:29,801 --> 00:33:33,012 Now, Edge, he had some fun too, 426 00:33:33,013 --> 00:33:37,266 but Edge was still not sure he wanted 427 00:33:37,267 --> 00:33:40,728 to be in a business of inflamed egos 428 00:33:40,729 --> 00:33:43,440 and pumped-up personalities. 429 00:33:44,399 --> 00:33:47,986 I asked him, would he make an exception for me? 430 00:33:49,988 --> 00:33:52,448 Arpeggiating his way out of a corner, 431 00:33:52,449 --> 00:33:55,117 Edge began working on the sketch of a song. 432 00:33:55,118 --> 00:34:00,290 Well, not just a song, a map. A way forward for U2 in the world. 433 00:34:01,208 --> 00:34:05,546 "Sunday, Bloody Sunday" was religious art meets The Clash. 434 00:34:08,674 --> 00:34:13,262 But its ambition was to contrast the original Easter Sunday 435 00:34:13,762 --> 00:34:18,516 with the massacre of 14 unarmed protesters in the city of Derry. 436 00:34:20,853 --> 00:34:22,562 While Edge was in his flat in Dublin, 437 00:34:22,563 --> 00:34:26,775 I was with my bride in Jamaica, writing lyrics for these new songs, 438 00:34:27,734 --> 00:34:31,572 explaining to Ali why our honeymoon album was gonna be called War. 439 00:34:34,824 --> 00:34:38,245 I can't believe the news today 440 00:34:41,206 --> 00:34:46,879 I can't close my eyes, make it go away 441 00:34:48,338 --> 00:34:50,090 How long 442 00:34:51,007 --> 00:34:53,719 How long must we sing this song? 443 00:34:55,304 --> 00:34:58,891 How long, how long? 444 00:35:03,270 --> 00:35:06,899 Tonight 445 00:35:07,566 --> 00:35:09,610 We can be as one 446 00:35:10,652 --> 00:35:15,449 Tonight, tonight 447 00:35:19,119 --> 00:35:22,497 Broken bottles under children's feet 448 00:35:25,918 --> 00:35:31,215 Bodies strewn across The dead-end street 449 00:35:32,090 --> 00:35:36,637 I won't heed the battle call 450 00:35:39,973 --> 00:35:41,933 Puts my back up 451 00:35:41,934 --> 00:35:45,479 My back up against the wall 452 00:35:46,939 --> 00:35:51,777 Sunday, bloody Sunday 453 00:35:54,321 --> 00:35:58,534 Sunday, bloody Sunday 454 00:36:01,703 --> 00:36:06,124 Sunday, bloody Sunday 455 00:36:08,919 --> 00:36:12,588 - Sunday - Bloody Sunday 456 00:36:12,589 --> 00:36:17,469 Here she comes 457 00:36:19,972 --> 00:36:26,979 Here she comes 458 00:36:28,480 --> 00:36:35,070 Here she comes, yeah 459 00:36:36,280 --> 00:36:40,700 Here she 460 00:36:40,701 --> 00:36:43,996 Comes 461 00:36:45,664 --> 00:36:48,125 I'm here at the murder scene 462 00:36:51,879 --> 00:36:54,006 The beginning of a fiction 463 00:36:55,048 --> 00:36:57,009 Facts will not complete 464 00:36:59,928 --> 00:37:04,183 Why so many mothers cry 465 00:37:06,101 --> 00:37:08,519 Is religion now the enemy 466 00:37:08,520 --> 00:37:11,815 Of the Holy Spirit guide? 467 00:37:13,901 --> 00:37:17,487 The real battle yet begun 468 00:37:21,325 --> 00:37:26,496 Where is the victory Jesus 469 00:37:29,750 --> 00:37:32,794 Won? 470 00:37:42,346 --> 00:37:45,181 Something to know about performers: 471 00:37:45,182 --> 00:37:50,604 in pursuit of truth, we are capable of more untruth than most. 472 00:37:51,605 --> 00:37:53,482 Cheers. 473 00:37:56,443 --> 00:37:57,486 Show business. 474 00:37:59,696 --> 00:38:01,822 Back in the Sorrento Lounge, 475 00:38:01,823 --> 00:38:04,701 the usual opening line from the da. 476 00:38:06,537 --> 00:38:10,582 "Anything strange or startling?" 477 00:38:11,250 --> 00:38:14,752 Everything is strange and startling. 478 00:38:14,753 --> 00:38:19,340 "Oh, you're right there. I took a taxi out here today. 479 00:38:19,341 --> 00:38:21,926 The driver saw where I was going 480 00:38:21,927 --> 00:38:24,888 and asked if I knew Bono." 481 00:38:26,139 --> 00:38:28,433 "I said, 'I do not. Do you?'" 482 00:38:29,017 --> 00:38:33,396 "Sure, we all know Bono out here. Sure. Isn't he hounded by the Pavarotti?" 483 00:38:33,397 --> 00:38:36,858 "Hounded. Hounded by the Pavarotti. 484 00:38:36,859 --> 00:38:40,529 I never heard that one. Paparazzi, is it?" 485 00:38:42,281 --> 00:38:45,116 Funny you should say that. 486 00:38:45,117 --> 00:38:48,786 The great "Paparazzi" himself has been calling the house again. 487 00:38:48,787 --> 00:38:54,293 This time, he wants us to perform with him in his hometown of Modena 488 00:38:54,793 --> 00:38:59,046 to raise money for refugees from the war in Bosnia. 489 00:38:59,047 --> 00:39:00,549 I mean, how do you say no to that? 490 00:39:01,133 --> 00:39:04,136 "For once, would you just do what you're told?" 491 00:39:05,762 --> 00:39:07,221 I want to do what I'm told. 492 00:39:07,222 --> 00:39:12,059 But I'm also being told by the band to stop getting distracted 493 00:39:12,060 --> 00:39:13,853 so we can finish a U2 album, 494 00:39:13,854 --> 00:39:15,564 rather than ones for Pavarotti. 495 00:39:17,024 --> 00:39:21,986 Let me explain something about being in this band 496 00:39:21,987 --> 00:39:24,865 that even my da doesn't understand. 497 00:39:25,657 --> 00:39:31,705 The popular perception is that I am the leader of U2. I wish. 498 00:39:33,081 --> 00:39:36,542 I voted that U2 should be an actual democracy. 499 00:39:36,543 --> 00:39:40,880 So, now I'm in a band with three other people, 500 00:39:40,881 --> 00:39:43,967 each of whom thinks he is the leader of U2. 501 00:39:45,093 --> 00:39:46,844 So, my wanting to do something 502 00:39:46,845 --> 00:39:50,849 does not necessarily mean they are wanting to do something. 503 00:39:51,517 --> 00:39:54,311 Anyway, I'm telling this to the da. 504 00:39:54,811 --> 00:40:00,024 And, Da, the whole band was in the studio in Hanover Quay 505 00:40:00,025 --> 00:40:03,403 when the phone rings, you know. 506 00:40:06,240 --> 00:40:10,993 "Bono, Bono, Bono. How are you? 507 00:40:10,994 --> 00:40:13,830 Are you weary from the mountaintop? 508 00:40:15,123 --> 00:40:19,962 Have you come down the mountaintop with the tablets of rock and roll?" 509 00:40:21,588 --> 00:40:25,007 The new album. Yeah, we're late as always. 510 00:40:25,008 --> 00:40:26,884 "You told me this, 511 00:40:26,885 --> 00:40:31,806 and dearest Bono, that is why I am here to help." 512 00:40:31,807 --> 00:40:35,893 I'm sorry? You're in Dublin? 513 00:40:35,894 --> 00:40:41,524 "I am this very minute in the Irish customs and exercise. 514 00:40:41,525 --> 00:40:44,151 I have told them I have nothing to declare 515 00:40:44,152 --> 00:40:48,949 but my love of Bono, Edge, James and Larry." 516 00:40:50,576 --> 00:40:54,328 "It is my sole purpose in this moment 517 00:40:54,329 --> 00:40:57,958 to be of service to these great men." 518 00:40:59,793 --> 00:41:02,336 Oh, maestro, they are great men 519 00:41:02,337 --> 00:41:06,299 and this is a great honor, but it's not a great moment. 520 00:41:06,300 --> 00:41:08,844 "They don't like me?" 521 00:41:09,428 --> 00:41:12,263 It's worse. They don't care. 522 00:41:12,264 --> 00:41:14,140 I mean, these are the children of punk rock. 523 00:41:14,141 --> 00:41:17,268 They will likely suspect that you are just here 524 00:41:17,269 --> 00:41:20,230 to twist their arm into going to Modena. 525 00:41:23,025 --> 00:41:24,483 "This pains me. 526 00:41:24,484 --> 00:41:29,030 I came only in genuflection and cordiality, 527 00:41:29,031 --> 00:41:32,825 and now you question my motivation." 528 00:41:32,826 --> 00:41:35,620 No. No, maestro. It's not like that. 529 00:41:35,621 --> 00:41:38,373 "Perfetto. I am on my way." 530 00:41:39,499 --> 00:41:43,045 Fuck. Fuck. 531 00:41:48,258 --> 00:41:52,553 I go to Edge, Adam and Larry, 532 00:41:52,554 --> 00:41:56,849 I say, "Look, he's the greatest singer in the history of the world. 533 00:41:56,850 --> 00:42:02,898 It's a huge honor he's coming to see us in the next half an hour." 534 00:42:04,858 --> 00:42:10,446 "The next half an hour? He might be coming to see you," says Larry. 535 00:42:10,447 --> 00:42:11,865 "He's not coming to see us." 536 00:42:12,449 --> 00:42:15,952 "This is some kind of stunt," says Adam. 537 00:42:15,953 --> 00:42:20,790 "He'd likely show up with a photographer, you know? We will not be coerced." 538 00:42:20,791 --> 00:42:22,333 What are you going to do? Hide? 539 00:42:22,334 --> 00:42:24,293 "No, we're not gonna hide," says Edge. 540 00:42:24,294 --> 00:42:28,381 "Actually," say Adam and Larry in perfect unison, 541 00:42:28,382 --> 00:42:33,219 "that is exactly what we're gonna do. We are going to hide." 542 00:42:33,220 --> 00:42:34,136 Sorry? 543 00:42:34,137 --> 00:42:38,225 And with that, two grown men hide from Luciano Pavarotti. 544 00:42:38,725 --> 00:42:40,310 The buzzer rings... 545 00:42:43,355 --> 00:42:46,441 and there he stands. Oh, my God. 546 00:42:47,484 --> 00:42:52,739 The greatest singer in the history of the wor-- 547 00:42:55,534 --> 00:42:56,743 With a film crew. 548 00:42:58,120 --> 00:43:01,665 Seven or eight excited Italians. One of them's crying. 549 00:43:02,791 --> 00:43:07,086 "Bono, Bono, Bono. Edge, Edge. Bono, Edge. 550 00:43:07,087 --> 00:43:09,006 Where are James and Larry?" 551 00:43:10,382 --> 00:43:14,553 "These are my friends from Rai Uno. They have a satellite dish 552 00:43:15,095 --> 00:43:18,181 in case we decide to announce the show in Modena. 553 00:43:18,182 --> 00:43:19,850 I mean, while we're all together." 554 00:43:27,149 --> 00:43:30,943 "In what corner of the universe 555 00:43:30,944 --> 00:43:33,613 is the great Pavarotti knocking on your door 556 00:43:33,614 --> 00:43:37,784 and you are not letting him in? Has the world gone bloody mad?" 557 00:43:38,952 --> 00:43:44,248 Da, in my corner of the universe, we very much let him in. 558 00:43:44,249 --> 00:43:45,917 In Edge's corner too. 559 00:43:45,918 --> 00:43:50,505 In fact, we're off to be part of Pavarotti & Friends 560 00:43:50,506 --> 00:43:53,257 to support War Child in Modena. 561 00:43:53,258 --> 00:43:54,509 Yes. 562 00:43:54,510 --> 00:43:56,969 Adam and Larry are missing in action on this one, 563 00:43:56,970 --> 00:44:01,016 but would you like to go? 564 00:44:06,980 --> 00:44:07,814 "Really? 565 00:44:09,399 --> 00:44:10,400 Okay, 566 00:44:11,527 --> 00:44:15,656 I suppose you better have at least one real tenor on your side." 567 00:44:22,538 --> 00:44:25,666 And then... 568 00:44:35,634 --> 00:44:39,763 The greatest voice in the history of the world. 569 00:44:48,605 --> 00:44:51,108 But the miracle in Modena 570 00:44:51,900 --> 00:44:55,945 was the transformation of Brendan Robert Hewson, 571 00:44:55,946 --> 00:44:57,613 my Irish Catholic father, 572 00:44:57,614 --> 00:44:59,699 not by Luciano Pavarotti, 573 00:44:59,700 --> 00:45:05,496 but by the woman on his arm, Diana, Princess of Wales. 574 00:45:05,497 --> 00:45:11,377 For those of you who don't know, Edge's family were Welsh, 575 00:45:11,378 --> 00:45:15,298 so they were thrilled to meet the Princess of Wales. 576 00:45:15,299 --> 00:45:20,929 Edge dared me to ask the da, so I did. 577 00:45:22,347 --> 00:45:27,226 Da, you fancy meeting Lady Di? 578 00:45:27,227 --> 00:45:29,395 The Evans are wondering. 579 00:45:29,396 --> 00:45:34,817 "What? Why would I want to meet a member of the royal family? 580 00:45:34,818 --> 00:45:39,406 I mean, that's like asking me, do I want to meet the winner of the lotto?" 581 00:45:42,910 --> 00:45:46,330 Got it. I know. Just asking. 582 00:45:47,706 --> 00:45:51,125 The next bit you just couldn't make up. 583 00:45:51,126 --> 00:45:53,878 The da is in our trailer, 584 00:45:53,879 --> 00:45:59,509 not eating from Pavarotti's deli tray of exotic Italian meats 585 00:45:59,510 --> 00:46:01,720 with names that none of us can pronounce. 586 00:46:03,514 --> 00:46:05,307 And when he turns around... 587 00:46:08,101 --> 00:46:09,728 she's right there. 588 00:46:11,021 --> 00:46:15,650 Approaching 6 feet tall in her heels, 589 00:46:15,651 --> 00:46:18,487 a vision in ivory. 590 00:46:20,030 --> 00:46:25,536 Diana approached the da as if in slow motion. 591 00:46:26,537 --> 00:46:31,583 "How do you do?" 592 00:46:33,502 --> 00:46:35,503 The da melted. 593 00:46:35,504 --> 00:46:38,673 The shock of a close encounter with the British royal family 594 00:46:38,674 --> 00:46:41,593 quickly became a teenage crush. 595 00:46:44,805 --> 00:46:48,141 "Very well. Thank you for asking. 596 00:46:49,142 --> 00:46:51,102 Very pleased to meet you." 597 00:46:51,103 --> 00:46:56,233 800 years of oppression, disappearing in eight seconds. 598 00:46:58,902 --> 00:47:03,322 If you've ever wondered about the usefulness of the royals-- 599 00:47:03,323 --> 00:47:05,534 which a lot of Irish people have-- 600 00:47:07,077 --> 00:47:09,662 I would point to this incident. 601 00:47:09,663 --> 00:47:15,252 Eight centuries of oppression, one princess and we're even. Yes. 602 00:47:20,132 --> 00:47:22,925 When we get home, 603 00:47:22,926 --> 00:47:27,346 the da is still talking about Princess Diana, 604 00:47:27,347 --> 00:47:30,142 but he's modulating. 605 00:47:31,310 --> 00:47:35,271 "I must say, she does great things for charity, 606 00:47:35,272 --> 00:47:40,610 but it's not charity that you're on about, is it? 607 00:47:40,611 --> 00:47:42,612 It's justice, isn't it? 608 00:47:42,613 --> 00:47:47,743 I mean, you wouldn't need charity if the world was just." 609 00:47:49,578 --> 00:47:54,875 Is the son starting to make sense to the father? 610 00:47:55,918 --> 00:47:58,002 "I wouldn't go that far, 611 00:47:58,003 --> 00:48:03,216 but I heard your song 'Pride' on the radio, 612 00:48:03,217 --> 00:48:07,221 and I might have felt some." 613 00:48:08,555 --> 00:48:15,436 Well, you know, it was that song that got us an invitation to Live Aid. 614 00:48:15,437 --> 00:48:20,776 Bob Geldof said that when he heard it, he could forgive me the mullet. 615 00:48:22,402 --> 00:48:25,988 When U2 walked on stage at Live Aid, 616 00:48:25,989 --> 00:48:31,661 we found ourselves looking out at a sea of white flags of surrender, 617 00:48:31,662 --> 00:48:33,914 swelling in the wind, even then, 618 00:48:34,706 --> 00:48:37,292 and a generous spirit moving through the crowd. 619 00:48:38,293 --> 00:48:44,841 Felt like our punk prayers were coming of age, 620 00:48:44,842 --> 00:48:45,758 you know? 621 00:48:45,759 --> 00:48:47,469 Prayers of peace. 622 00:48:48,095 --> 00:48:53,308 Because to be hungry is to be at war with yourself. 623 00:48:54,184 --> 00:48:58,480 To be at war with the very ground that you walk on. 624 00:48:59,898 --> 00:49:00,899 That's right. 625 00:49:05,112 --> 00:49:09,366 One man comes in the name of love 626 00:49:09,825 --> 00:49:12,744 One man to come and go 627 00:49:14,288 --> 00:49:17,708 One man comes he to justify 628 00:49:18,959 --> 00:49:21,503 One man to overthrow 629 00:49:22,713 --> 00:49:26,425 In the name of love 630 00:49:27,176 --> 00:49:30,846 What more in the name of love 631 00:49:31,763 --> 00:49:35,642 In the name of love 632 00:49:36,185 --> 00:49:39,730 What more in the name of love 633 00:49:41,523 --> 00:49:45,902 One man caught on a barbed-wire fence 634 00:49:45,903 --> 00:49:48,405 One man he resist 635 00:49:50,657 --> 00:49:54,952 One boy washed up on an empty beach 636 00:49:54,953 --> 00:49:58,248 One boy who never will be kissed 637 00:49:58,874 --> 00:50:02,753 In the name of love 638 00:50:03,378 --> 00:50:07,049 What more in the name of love 639 00:50:08,050 --> 00:50:12,011 In the name of love 640 00:50:12,012 --> 00:50:16,682 What more in the name of love 641 00:50:16,683 --> 00:50:17,976 Oh, yeah! 642 00:50:19,102 --> 00:50:21,980 Wembley Stadium, London. 643 00:50:22,981 --> 00:50:27,486 A thought is being broadcast all over the world. 644 00:50:29,029 --> 00:50:31,240 What if we were the world? 645 00:50:32,115 --> 00:50:34,493 What if we could feed the world? 646 00:50:35,369 --> 00:50:36,537 What else? 647 00:50:37,579 --> 00:50:41,457 What else could be done in the name of love? What else? 648 00:50:41,458 --> 00:50:45,254 I still ask myself that question, 649 00:50:46,088 --> 00:50:50,551 and I still wanna know the answer. 650 00:50:53,470 --> 00:50:57,640 In the name of love 651 00:50:57,641 --> 00:51:01,520 What more in the name of love 652 00:51:02,354 --> 00:51:06,816 In the name of love 653 00:51:06,817 --> 00:51:10,320 What more in the name of love 654 00:51:11,363 --> 00:51:15,867 In the name of love 655 00:51:15,868 --> 00:51:19,830 What more in the name of love 656 00:51:20,664 --> 00:51:24,917 In the name of love 657 00:51:24,918 --> 00:51:29,882 What more in the name of love 658 00:51:48,817 --> 00:51:54,948 Live Aid and all its spin-offs raised $250 million. 659 00:51:58,744 --> 00:52:02,038 But African countries were paying that sum 660 00:52:02,039 --> 00:52:06,250 to you and me every week 661 00:52:06,251 --> 00:52:11,797 for old loans we shoved down their throats during the Cold War. 662 00:52:11,798 --> 00:52:14,927 "Every fucking week," as Bob Geldof would say. 663 00:52:16,261 --> 00:52:18,305 I learned a big lesson from that. 664 00:52:18,931 --> 00:52:23,100 Injustice is often disguised as bad luck. 665 00:52:23,101 --> 00:52:25,436 As front man with U2, 666 00:52:25,437 --> 00:52:29,106 I realized that if U2 667 00:52:29,107 --> 00:52:33,070 was gonna be writing big songs about big subjects, 668 00:52:33,654 --> 00:52:35,447 I needed a bigger brain. 669 00:52:36,698 --> 00:52:39,116 A software update. 670 00:52:39,117 --> 00:52:43,454 Rather than go back to school-- You don't have to laugh actually. 671 00:52:43,455 --> 00:52:45,414 It's all good. 672 00:52:45,415 --> 00:52:48,669 I went to Africa with the missus. 673 00:52:50,170 --> 00:52:51,921 Ali and I were working in this orphanage 674 00:52:51,922 --> 00:52:55,884 in Ajebar, South Wollo, Ethiopia. 675 00:52:57,094 --> 00:53:00,764 It's the autumn of 1985. 676 00:53:01,265 --> 00:53:05,894 These rural people are struggling to survive without food and water. 677 00:53:06,436 --> 00:53:10,106 Their world has turned in on them. 678 00:53:10,107 --> 00:53:14,069 The very land they live off has refused them entry. 679 00:53:15,195 --> 00:53:19,866 Tsegaye: "I am the source, I am the Nile, 680 00:53:19,867 --> 00:53:22,743 I am the African, I am the beginning! 681 00:53:22,744 --> 00:53:26,539 I am the song, I am the singing 682 00:53:26,540 --> 00:53:32,044 I am the Ethiopia that 'stretches her hand in supplication to God' 683 00:53:32,045 --> 00:53:37,300 O Nile, you are the eloquence that rings the Ethiopian bell 684 00:53:37,301 --> 00:53:39,678 across the deaf world!" 685 00:53:41,096 --> 00:53:45,183 Because buried in this ground are great riches. 686 00:53:45,184 --> 00:53:49,812 But a great famine has turned this great nation upside down. 687 00:53:49,813 --> 00:53:55,276 Same country is about to turn our tiny lives right side up. 688 00:53:55,277 --> 00:54:00,240 We will never be the same again and we won't want to be. 689 00:54:01,700 --> 00:54:03,410 In this parched place, 690 00:54:03,911 --> 00:54:08,624 we learn lessons from a landscape and a people that we can never forget. 691 00:54:09,124 --> 00:54:12,126 "Poverty is not natural. 692 00:54:12,127 --> 00:54:19,091 It is man-made and can be overcome by the actions of women and men." 693 00:54:19,092 --> 00:54:22,887 Most likely women, who better understand 694 00:54:22,888 --> 00:54:27,518 that where you live should not decide whether you live. 695 00:54:30,896 --> 00:54:31,897 Are we right? 696 00:54:38,111 --> 00:54:40,113 I wanna run 697 00:54:41,615 --> 00:54:43,951 I want to hide 698 00:54:45,369 --> 00:54:48,913 I want to tear down the walls 699 00:54:48,914 --> 00:54:51,375 That hold me inside 700 00:54:52,543 --> 00:54:54,545 Show me a place 701 00:54:56,213 --> 00:54:58,715 High on the desert plain 702 00:55:00,342 --> 00:55:03,178 Where the streets have no name 703 00:55:07,266 --> 00:55:09,393 I wanted to feel 704 00:55:10,561 --> 00:55:12,980 Sunlight on my face 705 00:55:14,857 --> 00:55:18,359 But I need some shade and shelter 706 00:55:18,360 --> 00:55:20,821 In this waterless place 707 00:55:22,114 --> 00:55:24,491 Each desert rose 708 00:55:25,409 --> 00:55:27,786 Is a prayer for rain 709 00:55:29,872 --> 00:55:32,291 Where the streets have no name 710 00:55:36,128 --> 00:55:38,547 Where the streets have no name 711 00:55:39,882 --> 00:55:42,176 Where the streets have no name 712 00:55:43,635 --> 00:55:48,015 We're still building And burning down love 713 00:55:48,599 --> 00:55:51,267 We're burning down love 714 00:55:51,268 --> 00:55:54,021 We can get through the fire 715 00:55:54,897 --> 00:55:56,982 If I go with you 716 00:55:58,442 --> 00:56:00,903 There's no other way through 717 00:56:16,502 --> 00:56:20,964 It was hard for Ali and me to come back from Ethiopia. 718 00:56:21,757 --> 00:56:23,759 A large part of us is still there, actually. 719 00:56:25,928 --> 00:56:28,346 After The Joshua Tree, 720 00:56:28,347 --> 00:56:32,975 U2 were getting a bit famous. 721 00:56:32,976 --> 00:56:35,394 A bit mainstream. 722 00:56:35,395 --> 00:56:41,360 We were either gonna be embarrassed about that or not. 723 00:56:42,110 --> 00:56:44,237 Fame is currency, 724 00:56:44,238 --> 00:56:48,242 and we wanted to use what you gave us to do more 725 00:56:48,951 --> 00:56:51,118 than get a seat at a fancy restaurant. 726 00:56:51,119 --> 00:56:54,373 Which, by the way, is not to be sniffed at. 727 00:56:55,791 --> 00:56:58,251 I joined some new bands. 728 00:56:58,252 --> 00:57:03,632 Drop the Debt, RED, the ONE Campaign, fighting extreme poverty. 729 00:57:04,383 --> 00:57:07,552 Really, the ONE Campaign just had one idea. 730 00:57:07,553 --> 00:57:11,223 You don't have to agree with someone on everything 731 00:57:12,015 --> 00:57:14,977 if the one thing you do agree on is important enough. 732 00:57:15,936 --> 00:57:21,233 This led to meetings with people who held the purse strings for the world's poor. 733 00:57:22,150 --> 00:57:23,527 There are such people. 734 00:57:24,111 --> 00:57:29,616 They're called the government. They're called the IMF, the World Bank. 735 00:57:31,827 --> 00:57:34,829 This might be a moment to break the fourth wall... 736 00:57:34,830 --> 00:57:35,746 Really? 737 00:57:35,747 --> 00:57:38,624 ...and ask some hard questions about my motivations. 738 00:57:38,625 --> 00:57:41,962 Okay, there's been a mistake in the teleprompter. EHP. 739 00:57:42,588 --> 00:57:47,759 Am I trying to cover up my guilt for having such a lavish lifestyle? 740 00:57:48,260 --> 00:57:49,802 Yes, my lifestyle is lavish. 741 00:57:49,803 --> 00:57:55,726 I am an overpaid, overregarded, overrewarded, overfed rock-and-roll star. 742 00:57:57,269 --> 00:57:58,937 Am I a hypocrite? Yes. 743 00:58:00,355 --> 00:58:01,857 But not on this front. 744 00:58:02,441 --> 00:58:04,026 On a lot of other fronts. 745 00:58:04,735 --> 00:58:07,445 But I will say, hypocrites get a bad rap. 746 00:58:07,446 --> 00:58:10,991 I mean, hypocrites do the right thing at least some of the time. 747 00:58:12,576 --> 00:58:14,161 But in the end... 748 00:58:16,163 --> 00:58:17,246 what does it matter? 749 00:58:17,247 --> 00:58:22,544 I mean, really, who cares? Motives don't matter. 750 00:58:23,504 --> 00:58:27,590 Outcomes matter. Lives matter. 751 00:58:27,591 --> 00:58:32,011 Human potential matters. Justice matters. 752 00:58:32,012 --> 00:58:37,642 You wouldn't need charity if the world was just, as the da says. 753 00:58:37,643 --> 00:58:42,814 But it's not, so get the check. Get the check. 754 00:58:44,691 --> 00:58:48,152 Lover, I'm off the streets 755 00:58:48,153 --> 00:58:52,074 Gonna go where the bright lights Big city meet 756 00:58:52,741 --> 00:58:56,787 With a red guitar, on fire 757 00:58:57,871 --> 00:59:00,999 Desire 758 00:59:01,959 --> 00:59:05,587 She's the candle burning in my room 759 00:59:06,213 --> 00:59:09,967 I'm like the needle, needle and spoon 760 00:59:10,634 --> 00:59:14,471 Over the counter, with a shotgun 761 00:59:15,389 --> 00:59:18,851 Pretty soon, everybody got one 762 00:59:19,810 --> 00:59:23,522 In a fever when I'm beside her 763 00:59:24,690 --> 00:59:27,693 Desire 764 00:59:29,403 --> 00:59:32,322 Desire 765 00:59:33,740 --> 00:59:36,034 Burning 766 00:59:38,078 --> 00:59:40,581 Burning, baby 767 00:59:41,206 --> 00:59:43,709 Burning with love 768 00:59:50,716 --> 00:59:54,552 She's the dollars, she's my protection 769 00:59:54,553 --> 00:59:58,974 She is the promise In the year of election 770 01:00:00,142 --> 01:00:04,187 Oh, sister, can't let you go 771 01:00:04,188 --> 01:00:07,900 I'm like a preacher stealing hearts At a traveling show 772 01:00:08,483 --> 01:00:12,945 For love or money, money Love or money, money 773 01:00:12,946 --> 01:00:17,950 Love or money, money, money, Money, money, money, money, money 774 01:00:17,951 --> 01:00:21,330 And the fever, I can't deny her 775 01:00:22,414 --> 01:00:25,250 Desire 776 01:00:26,919 --> 01:00:30,130 Desire 777 01:00:31,340 --> 01:00:35,927 And mark and yen to the pound To the pound, to the pound 778 01:00:35,928 --> 01:00:39,640 And all that makes the world go round The world go round 779 01:00:40,349 --> 01:00:42,433 Makes the world go round 780 01:00:42,434 --> 01:00:47,397 Money makes the world go round 781 01:00:48,690 --> 01:00:49,691 Really? 782 01:00:58,116 --> 01:01:02,495 All right, they're gonna change the cameras, 783 01:01:02,496 --> 01:01:07,584 and I'm gonna have a very strong drink... 784 01:01:08,460 --> 01:01:10,128 And we'll be right back. 785 01:01:15,634 --> 01:01:16,884 We got four lenses, 786 01:01:16,885 --> 01:01:19,011 - and we're looking for the hero lens. - Okay. 787 01:01:19,012 --> 01:01:22,306 Right. The most beautiful. We would like you to stand there. 788 01:01:22,307 --> 01:01:25,185 - I would love to. - And we'll micro direct you. 789 01:01:27,062 --> 01:01:28,564 Focus on the near eye. 790 01:01:29,857 --> 01:01:32,692 Beautiful. We're never gonna go tighter than that, are we? 791 01:01:32,693 --> 01:01:33,818 I don't think so. 792 01:01:33,819 --> 01:01:35,111 I think that'd be a bit, 793 01:01:35,112 --> 01:01:37,948 difficult to perform with those limitations. 794 01:01:39,324 --> 01:01:40,659 Okay, so turn around, buddy. 795 01:01:43,954 --> 01:01:47,291 Yeah. No, that's pretty good. He sort of naturally knows what to do, right? 796 01:01:49,084 --> 01:01:50,627 It's the third act. 797 01:01:51,628 --> 01:01:53,212 All right, that's good. 798 01:01:53,213 --> 01:01:54,715 The confessional. 799 01:01:59,136 --> 01:02:01,679 All this saving the world, 800 01:02:01,680 --> 01:02:06,101 is it really service, duty, righteous anger, 801 01:02:06,852 --> 01:02:13,817 or is it just a childlike desire to be at the center of the action? 802 01:02:15,110 --> 01:02:16,570 The center of attention. 803 01:02:19,865 --> 01:02:21,491 Which begs the question, 804 01:02:22,576 --> 01:02:26,038 can you have a child and remain a child? 805 01:02:35,214 --> 01:02:37,216 Time to grow up. 806 01:02:39,218 --> 01:02:40,677 Can't fuck this up. 807 01:02:46,683 --> 01:02:49,436 Desire and virtue 808 01:02:51,396 --> 01:02:52,688 is a whole dance, 809 01:02:52,689 --> 01:02:57,527 and no one does it better than my missus. 810 01:02:57,528 --> 01:02:59,529 "Desire" went to number one in the charts. 811 01:02:59,530 --> 01:03:03,867 I don't know if there's a connection, but we were so excited 812 01:03:05,160 --> 01:03:06,912 we had our first baby. 813 01:03:09,498 --> 01:03:10,706 I didn't know how to feel. 814 01:03:10,707 --> 01:03:15,170 I didn't know if I'd know how to be a father. 815 01:03:17,381 --> 01:03:19,465 Didn't know if I could be a father 816 01:03:19,466 --> 01:03:24,429 because I didn't think I had been much of a son. 817 01:03:28,016 --> 01:03:31,854 I said in the beginning that Alison Stewart had faith. 818 01:03:32,646 --> 01:03:38,151 I mean, this woman part wrote the story that you're listening to. 819 01:03:40,445 --> 01:03:42,697 When Ali and I married, 820 01:03:42,698 --> 01:03:46,827 we moved out of our family homes. 821 01:03:47,494 --> 01:03:49,246 That's how young we were. 822 01:03:50,122 --> 01:03:54,334 We moved into an old stone tower on the Irish coast, 823 01:03:55,252 --> 01:03:56,253 the lighthouse. 824 01:03:58,589 --> 01:04:02,133 Ali will let her soul be searched, 825 01:04:02,134 --> 01:04:06,679 but only if you arrive at her fort defenseless, 826 01:04:06,680 --> 01:04:09,141 have you half a chance at challenging 827 01:04:09,892 --> 01:04:13,978 her own almost unbroachable defenses, 828 01:04:13,979 --> 01:04:16,148 it's the only way over that drawbridge. 829 01:04:18,317 --> 01:04:20,526 Wasn't two years into our marriage, 830 01:04:20,527 --> 01:04:26,282 and I could see my wife in prolonged moments 831 01:04:26,283 --> 01:04:31,580 returning to the vast silence that she holds inside herself. 832 01:04:33,207 --> 01:04:38,044 She was suggesting that even when I was home, I wasn't home. 833 01:04:38,045 --> 01:04:42,883 Our weekly walks along the promenade tinged with melancholy, 834 01:04:44,009 --> 01:04:48,680 as the waves try to make up their mind whether they're leaving or staying. 835 01:04:49,264 --> 01:04:50,432 Leaving or staying. 836 01:04:51,892 --> 01:04:55,270 See the stone set in your eyes 837 01:04:56,355 --> 01:04:59,274 Am I such a thorn in your side? 838 01:05:00,817 --> 01:05:04,195 Should I wait for you? 839 01:05:04,196 --> 01:05:08,908 There's a selfishness implicit in the desire to be great at something. 840 01:05:08,909 --> 01:05:12,412 Sleight of hand and a twist of fate 841 01:05:13,038 --> 01:05:16,958 On a bed of nails you make me wait 842 01:05:16,959 --> 01:05:20,336 You're trying to prove yourself, but to who? 843 01:05:20,337 --> 01:05:22,005 Without you 844 01:05:23,841 --> 01:05:26,509 With or without you 845 01:05:26,510 --> 01:05:28,386 Alison Stewart saw to me... 846 01:05:28,387 --> 01:05:30,973 With or without you 847 01:05:31,765 --> 01:05:33,392 ...by seeing through me. 848 01:05:35,102 --> 01:05:38,312 Through the storm we reached the shore 849 01:05:38,313 --> 01:05:39,480 Before I had anything... 850 01:05:39,481 --> 01:05:42,483 You give it all but I want more 851 01:05:42,484 --> 01:05:44,026 ...before I had my name... 852 01:05:44,027 --> 01:05:45,486 And I'm greedy 853 01:05:45,487 --> 01:05:46,821 ...she knew what I had... 854 01:05:46,822 --> 01:05:48,406 For you 855 01:05:48,407 --> 01:05:49,907 ...and hadn't. 856 01:05:49,908 --> 01:05:53,202 With or without you 857 01:05:53,203 --> 01:05:54,287 Concentration. 858 01:05:54,288 --> 01:05:57,290 With or without you 859 01:05:57,291 --> 01:05:59,041 You can't be great at anything... 860 01:05:59,042 --> 01:06:01,294 I can't live 861 01:06:01,295 --> 01:06:03,379 ...without an incredible concentration. 862 01:06:03,380 --> 01:06:05,965 With or without you 863 01:06:05,966 --> 01:06:08,259 But a lot of it's just dysfunction. 864 01:06:08,260 --> 01:06:10,344 You give yourself away 865 01:06:10,345 --> 01:06:12,180 A sort of blindness... 866 01:06:12,181 --> 01:06:14,807 And you give yourself away 867 01:06:14,808 --> 01:06:18,729 ...where you might not see the person right next to you. 868 01:06:19,938 --> 01:06:21,314 You might want an audience... 869 01:06:21,315 --> 01:06:24,400 And you give yourself away 870 01:06:24,401 --> 01:06:26,069 more than you want a family. 871 01:06:26,653 --> 01:06:29,322 My hands are tied 872 01:06:29,323 --> 01:06:31,157 You might not want to give up... 873 01:06:31,158 --> 01:06:34,202 My body bruised, you got me with 874 01:06:34,203 --> 01:06:35,536 ...the emptiness... 875 01:06:35,537 --> 01:06:36,787 Nothing to win 876 01:06:36,788 --> 01:06:38,706 ...that gave you everything. 877 01:06:38,707 --> 01:06:41,792 And nothing left to lose 878 01:06:41,793 --> 01:06:44,838 With or without you 879 01:06:46,298 --> 01:06:50,092 With or without you 880 01:06:50,093 --> 01:06:54,931 I can't live 881 01:06:54,932 --> 01:06:57,726 With or without you 882 01:07:03,190 --> 01:07:05,316 I called my book Surrender 883 01:07:05,317 --> 01:07:08,737 because I knew this is a word I needed to understand better, 884 01:07:09,446 --> 01:07:11,072 that it was the antidote 885 01:07:11,073 --> 01:07:14,618 to whatever condition I was suffering from. 886 01:07:16,203 --> 01:07:18,872 And it didn't come natural to me. 887 01:07:33,971 --> 01:07:37,807 One Sunday in 1999, 888 01:07:37,808 --> 01:07:41,435 I'm back in the Sorrento Lounge with the da, 889 01:07:41,436 --> 01:07:44,398 and for the first time ever, 890 01:07:45,858 --> 01:07:50,820 decide I'll ambush him with his own question. 891 01:07:50,821 --> 01:07:52,072 Just throw it at him. 892 01:07:54,074 --> 01:07:57,661 Anything strange or startling, Da? 893 01:08:02,332 --> 01:08:05,043 "I have cancer. 894 01:08:06,837 --> 01:08:11,550 I'm in the departure lounge as it were. 895 01:08:12,301 --> 01:08:13,718 You won't be putting up 896 01:08:13,719 --> 01:08:18,807 with my unfunny jokes much longer." 897 01:08:26,773 --> 01:08:31,152 Huge boulders fall on your head, 898 01:08:31,153 --> 01:08:34,487 just like that, from some imaginary mountain. 899 01:08:34,488 --> 01:08:39,786 I thought I was getting to know him that there'd be more time. 900 01:08:41,913 --> 01:08:43,624 How Bob Hewson of you. 901 01:08:44,207 --> 01:08:46,209 Just when I thought I was finally getting to know you, 902 01:08:46,210 --> 01:08:50,923 that you might give up some answers, you give me the slip. 903 01:08:53,383 --> 01:08:55,385 Beaumont Hospital... 904 01:08:57,470 --> 01:08:59,472 Dublin, the summer of 2001. 905 01:08:59,473 --> 01:09:04,143 I see my father in a hospital bed. 906 01:09:04,144 --> 01:09:07,397 This time it's him who's running out of air. 907 01:09:07,898 --> 01:09:13,278 And I see myself lying next to him 908 01:09:13,904 --> 01:09:15,988 on a mattress on the floor. 909 01:09:16,490 --> 01:09:18,033 He's breathing, 910 01:09:19,660 --> 01:09:21,912 but his breathing's getting shallower, 911 01:09:23,037 --> 01:09:24,580 like the grave in his chest. 912 01:09:24,581 --> 01:09:26,542 He shouts my name, 913 01:09:27,376 --> 01:09:32,338 confusing me with my brother and the other way around. 914 01:09:32,339 --> 01:09:35,174 "Paul, Norman. Paul, Norman. Paul." 915 01:09:35,175 --> 01:09:39,263 I jump up, call the nurse. 916 01:09:40,639 --> 01:09:41,974 "Are you okay, Bob?" 917 01:09:42,850 --> 01:09:44,058 she whispers in his ear. 918 01:09:44,059 --> 01:09:48,271 His tenor has now become short, tinny breaths. 919 01:09:48,272 --> 01:09:53,527 An S after every exhalation. "Yes. Get me out of here. 920 01:09:54,027 --> 01:09:56,654 Get me out of here. I wanna go home. Yes. 921 01:09:56,655 --> 01:09:58,698 Yes, I wanna go home. Yes." 922 01:09:58,699 --> 01:10:05,038 I said, "It's okay. It's okay. It's okay. 923 01:10:08,959 --> 01:10:10,252 Are you okay?" 924 01:10:11,461 --> 01:10:12,671 Listen. 925 01:10:16,383 --> 01:10:17,593 Silence. 926 01:10:18,510 --> 01:10:24,474 I put my ear close to his mouth. 927 01:10:26,518 --> 01:10:27,728 Silence. 928 01:10:31,190 --> 01:10:34,735 Silence followed by, 929 01:10:35,944 --> 01:10:38,155 "Fuck off." 930 01:10:47,706 --> 01:10:54,337 There's something perfectly imperfect about my da's exit from my life. 931 01:10:54,338 --> 01:10:56,381 I don't believe he was telling me 932 01:10:57,007 --> 01:11:01,595 or the very vigilant night nurse to fuck off, 933 01:11:02,429 --> 01:11:03,847 though I'm not ruling that out. 934 01:11:05,724 --> 01:11:06,891 I'd like to think 935 01:11:06,892 --> 01:11:11,729 he was addressing the burdens that had been on his back for most of his life. 936 01:11:11,730 --> 01:11:13,398 I have a feeling... 937 01:11:16,985 --> 01:11:18,570 they're my inheritance, 938 01:11:19,738 --> 01:11:23,367 but I believe I have a choice in the matter. 939 01:11:26,828 --> 01:11:29,080 And there was kindness too. 940 01:11:29,081 --> 01:11:32,918 I think he believed that to dream 941 01:11:33,418 --> 01:11:35,921 was to be disappointed, 942 01:11:37,047 --> 01:11:38,924 and he didn't want that for me. 943 01:11:41,635 --> 01:11:44,095 This is a-- This is-- 944 01:11:44,096 --> 01:11:47,557 This is when you realize your father is your friend. 945 01:11:47,558 --> 01:11:52,104 And you know, the journey of-- 946 01:11:52,771 --> 01:11:57,692 you know, from father to friend is the only one to be on really, 947 01:11:57,693 --> 01:11:59,736 if you're a father, and I am. 948 01:12:01,113 --> 01:12:04,366 And I sort of made friends with my father 949 01:12:04,867 --> 01:12:07,703 after he passed, which is a bit of a mistake. 950 01:12:09,788 --> 01:12:15,751 To imagine the story from his perspective is humbling, you know. 951 01:12:15,752 --> 01:12:17,171 He loses his wife. 952 01:12:17,754 --> 01:12:20,298 He's left with his two kids, 953 01:12:20,299 --> 01:12:24,844 and one of them is charging in his direction, 954 01:12:24,845 --> 01:12:27,555 you know, coming for him guns blazing. 955 01:12:27,556 --> 01:12:29,473 And one of them is gonna take him out 956 01:12:29,474 --> 01:12:32,768 by achieving all the ambitions he was afraid to have. 957 01:12:32,769 --> 01:12:37,690 He told me in those final days, when accepting his cancers, 958 01:12:37,691 --> 01:12:39,193 that he'd lost his faith. 959 01:12:39,693 --> 01:12:42,528 And he also told me that I should never lose mine. 960 01:12:42,529 --> 01:12:45,824 That it was the most interesting thing about me. 961 01:12:47,701 --> 01:12:51,162 But it did happen, where I reached out... 962 01:12:51,163 --> 01:12:52,914 Yeshua. 963 01:12:52,915 --> 01:12:57,210 ...and that thing that I have 964 01:12:57,211 --> 01:13:00,338 - held so tightly... - Yeshua. 965 01:13:00,339 --> 01:13:04,551 ...wasn't there. It was the most terrifying moment of my life. 966 01:13:06,553 --> 01:13:08,138 Yeshua. 967 01:13:14,311 --> 01:13:17,105 Hold me close 968 01:13:19,733 --> 01:13:22,611 Hold me close and don't let 969 01:13:26,198 --> 01:13:30,953 Hold me close and don't let me go 970 01:13:31,995 --> 01:13:34,873 Hold me close 971 01:13:36,625 --> 01:13:41,171 Like I'm someone that you might know 972 01:14:12,119 --> 01:14:13,537 The heart is a bloom 973 01:14:16,290 --> 01:14:18,375 Shoots up through the stony ground 974 01:14:19,751 --> 01:14:21,044 There's no room 975 01:14:23,213 --> 01:14:25,340 No space to rent in this town 976 01:14:26,633 --> 01:14:27,926 You're out of luck 977 01:14:30,929 --> 01:14:32,931 The reason that you had to care 978 01:14:33,640 --> 01:14:35,142 Traffic is stuck 979 01:14:37,352 --> 01:14:39,021 You're not moving anywhere 980 01:14:41,231 --> 01:14:44,109 You thought you'd found a friend 981 01:14:45,444 --> 01:14:48,030 To take you out of this place 982 01:14:48,655 --> 01:14:52,783 Someone you could lend a hand 983 01:14:52,784 --> 01:14:55,620 In return for grace 984 01:14:55,621 --> 01:14:57,789 It's a beautiful day 985 01:15:00,792 --> 01:15:04,838 The sky falls You feel like it's a beautiful day 986 01:15:07,674 --> 01:15:09,718 Don't let it get away 987 01:15:10,511 --> 01:15:12,012 You're on the road 988 01:15:14,556 --> 01:15:17,642 But you got no destination 989 01:15:17,643 --> 01:15:20,395 You're in the mud 990 01:15:21,730 --> 01:15:24,857 In the maze of her imagination 991 01:15:24,858 --> 01:15:26,944 You love this town 992 01:15:29,488 --> 01:15:32,741 Even if that doesn't ring true 993 01:15:33,325 --> 01:15:35,661 You've been all over 994 01:15:36,495 --> 01:15:38,955 And it's been all over you 995 01:15:38,956 --> 01:15:43,585 It's a beautiful day 996 01:15:44,169 --> 01:15:46,712 Don't let it get away 997 01:15:46,713 --> 01:15:50,717 Beautiful day 998 01:15:51,426 --> 01:15:54,054 Yeah, yeah 999 01:15:55,138 --> 01:15:57,516 Touch me now 1000 01:15:58,600 --> 01:16:01,186 Take me to that other place 1001 01:16:02,604 --> 01:16:05,315 Teach me, love 1002 01:16:06,024 --> 01:16:08,735 I know I'm not a hopeless case 1003 01:16:16,785 --> 01:16:19,997 The dead are always with us Won't leave us alone 1004 01:16:20,664 --> 01:16:24,333 Blowing through our memories Rattling their bones 1005 01:16:24,334 --> 01:16:27,546 The dead are always with us There's more of them than us 1006 01:16:28,088 --> 01:16:31,091 The valley of dry bones, dust to dust 1007 01:16:31,842 --> 01:16:34,677 Parched and abandoned Filled with doubt 1008 01:16:34,678 --> 01:16:38,932 But after the flood All the colors came out 1009 01:16:44,813 --> 01:16:51,278 All the colors came out 1010 01:16:51,987 --> 01:16:54,489 It was a beautiful day 1011 01:16:56,867 --> 01:16:59,328 Don't let it get away 1012 01:16:59,828 --> 01:17:02,915 Beautiful day 1013 01:17:04,124 --> 01:17:06,960 Yeah, yeah 1014 01:17:07,961 --> 01:17:10,964 Touch me now 1015 01:17:11,465 --> 01:17:13,884 Take me to that other place 1016 01:17:15,135 --> 01:17:18,304 Reach me 1017 01:17:18,305 --> 01:17:21,225 I know I'm not a hopeless case 1018 01:17:22,017 --> 01:17:25,562 What you don't have You don't need it now 1019 01:17:26,355 --> 01:17:31,025 What you don't know You can feel it somehow 1020 01:17:31,026 --> 01:17:36,280 What you don't have You don't need it now 1021 01:17:36,281 --> 01:17:42,162 Don't need it now 1022 01:17:50,420 --> 01:17:55,466 I have a very unscientific theory 1023 01:17:55,467 --> 01:18:02,474 that when you lose someone you love, they bequeath you something. 1024 01:18:03,934 --> 01:18:04,977 A gift. 1025 01:18:13,485 --> 01:18:15,279 When I lost my mother... 1026 01:18:19,032 --> 01:18:20,117 well... 1027 01:18:22,119 --> 01:18:27,541 I got you to fill that hole. 1028 01:18:28,041 --> 01:18:33,296 When I lost my father, I found my voice started to change, 1029 01:18:33,297 --> 01:18:36,591 and I couldn't help thinking 1030 01:18:36,592 --> 01:18:39,970 that the baritone who thought he was a tenor 1031 01:18:41,388 --> 01:18:42,889 actually became one. 1032 01:18:42,890 --> 01:18:44,474 I don't know how. 1033 01:18:44,975 --> 01:18:47,311 All kinds of reasons. 1034 01:18:48,061 --> 01:18:52,566 Might have something to do with this word forgiveness. 1035 01:18:53,483 --> 01:18:58,405 I don't know if I forgave my father, or my father forgave me. 1036 01:19:01,742 --> 01:19:06,705 'Cause I was born with my fists up. 1037 01:19:07,289 --> 01:19:10,583 Surrender does not come easy to me. 1038 01:19:10,584 --> 01:19:16,507 To bow down to my bandmates, to my wife, to my Maker, 1039 01:19:17,132 --> 01:19:20,968 is a struggle. 1040 01:19:20,969 --> 01:19:26,766 I have faith enough to hope and hope enough to love. 1041 01:19:26,767 --> 01:19:30,771 And this music is how I practice that. 1042 01:19:31,313 --> 01:19:34,983 And my father on Earth, he gave me that. 1043 01:19:36,109 --> 01:19:41,323 And he left me with one of his favorite melodies to haunt me. 1044 01:19:42,324 --> 01:19:43,991 Only realized recently, 1045 01:19:43,992 --> 01:19:49,580 the title has the same name as our local watering hole, 1046 01:19:49,581 --> 01:19:51,834 the Sorrento Lounge. 1047 01:19:54,044 --> 01:19:55,337 "Come Back to Sorrento." 1048 01:19:56,922 --> 01:19:58,715 And it was this melody. 1049 01:20:02,261 --> 01:20:05,597 And I will. 1050 01:22:02,256 --> 01:22:05,259 One, two, three, four. 1051 01:22:11,181 --> 01:22:15,227 Baby's crying 'cause it's born to sing 1052 01:22:16,770 --> 01:22:20,899 Singers cry about everything 1053 01:22:22,401 --> 01:22:26,863 Still in the playground Falling off the swing 1054 01:22:26,864 --> 01:22:30,868 But you know that I know 1055 01:22:33,495 --> 01:22:35,455 I just can't remember the next bit. 1056 01:22:35,956 --> 01:22:37,708 What's the next bit of the melody? 1057 01:22:39,376 --> 01:22:41,419 Keep going. That's great. 1058 01:22:41,420 --> 01:22:43,629 One, two, three. 1059 01:22:43,630 --> 01:22:48,593 It is what it is It's not what it seems 1060 01:22:48,594 --> 01:22:54,015 This screwed-up stuff Is the stuff of dreams 1061 01:22:54,016 --> 01:22:59,478 I got just enough low self-esteem 1062 01:22:59,479 --> 01:23:03,901 To get me where I want to go 1063 01:23:04,860 --> 01:23:06,277 Another verse. 1064 01:23:06,278 --> 01:23:10,908 The showman gives you Front row to his heart 1065 01:23:11,783 --> 01:23:16,205 The showman prays His heartache will chart 1066 01:23:17,289 --> 01:23:21,209 Making a spectacle of falling apart 1067 01:23:21,210 --> 01:23:25,506 Is just the start of the show 1068 01:23:26,965 --> 01:23:31,303 Oh, you don't care 1069 01:23:32,012 --> 01:23:36,934 But you know I'm there 1070 01:23:37,476 --> 01:23:40,436 You think you look so good 1071 01:23:40,437 --> 01:23:43,523 A little more better 1072 01:23:43,524 --> 01:23:46,234 Look so good 1073 01:23:46,235 --> 01:23:48,694 A little more, little more 1074 01:23:48,695 --> 01:23:51,489 You think you look so good 1075 01:23:51,490 --> 01:23:54,408 That's what's gonna get you 1076 01:23:54,409 --> 01:23:57,870 Look so good 1077 01:23:57,871 --> 01:23:59,206 A to G. 1078 01:24:00,999 --> 01:24:05,003 I'll be chasing the sunlight 1079 01:24:05,838 --> 01:24:10,008 That's why I'm staying up all night 1080 01:24:10,509 --> 01:24:15,472 I lie for a living, I love to let on 1081 01:24:16,139 --> 01:24:22,980 But you make it true When you sing along 1082 01:24:24,648 --> 01:24:27,650 You think you look so good 1083 01:24:27,651 --> 01:24:30,695 A little more better 1084 01:24:30,696 --> 01:24:33,030 Look so good 1085 01:24:33,031 --> 01:24:35,700 A little more, little more 1086 01:24:35,701 --> 01:24:38,452 You think you look so good 1087 01:24:38,453 --> 01:24:41,664 That's what's gonna get you 1088 01:24:41,665 --> 01:24:44,709 Look so good 1089 01:24:44,710 --> 01:24:46,587 Keeps-- Keep chorus going. 1090 01:24:47,504 --> 01:24:49,714 Look so good 1091 01:24:49,715 --> 01:24:52,133 A little more better 1092 01:24:52,134 --> 01:24:54,969 You think you look so good 1093 01:24:54,970 --> 01:24:57,346 A little more, little more 1094 01:24:57,347 --> 01:25:00,433 You think you look so good 1095 01:25:00,434 --> 01:25:03,394 That's what's gonna get you 1096 01:25:03,395 --> 01:25:05,855 Look so good 1097 01:25:05,856 --> 01:25:08,566 A little more, little more 1098 01:25:08,567 --> 01:25:11,777 You think you look so good 1099 01:25:11,778 --> 01:25:14,447 A little more, little more 1100 01:25:14,448 --> 01:25:16,782 Look so good 1101 01:25:16,783 --> 01:25:20,287 A little more, little more 1102 01:25:45,646 --> 01:25:47,230 - Happy? - Back to work. 1103 01:25:47,231 --> 01:25:48,315 Okay. 1104 01:25:48,899 --> 01:25:50,776 - That was great. - I loved it. 85829

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