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It is preposterous to think that
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00:00:18,936 --> 00:00:23,565
others might be as interested
in your own story as you are.
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00:00:24,233 --> 00:00:29,905
Writing a memoir is a whole
other level of navel-gazing.
4
00:00:30,781 --> 00:00:32,406
But here we are.
5
00:00:33,242 --> 00:00:37,245
Tonight, I'd like to try out
some scenes from Surrender,
6
00:00:37,246 --> 00:00:39,872
me book what I wrote meself.
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00:00:39,873 --> 00:00:46,046
The first one's a dramatic opening.
Could have been a dramatic closing.
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00:00:47,047 --> 00:00:47,881
See...
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00:00:49,967 --> 00:00:53,053
I was born with an eccentric heart.
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00:00:53,929 --> 00:00:55,513
In one of the chambers of my heart,
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00:00:55,514 --> 00:00:59,768
where most people have three doors,
I have two.
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Two swinging doors, which at Christmas
2016 were coming off their hinges.
13
00:01:07,943 --> 00:01:11,697
The aorta is your main artery,
your lifeline.
14
00:01:12,656 --> 00:01:16,618
My aorta, after years of stress,
has developed a blister.
15
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A blister that's about to burst,
16
00:01:20,163 --> 00:01:26,461
which will put me in the next life faster
than I can say goodbye to this one.
17
00:01:27,629 --> 00:01:29,047
So here I am,
18
00:01:30,591 --> 00:01:34,303
Mount Sinai Hospital, New York City.
19
00:01:34,803 --> 00:01:38,932
Looking down on myself
on the stainless steel.
20
00:01:39,933 --> 00:01:43,936
Hot blood is swirling, spilling,
and making a mess,
21
00:01:43,937 --> 00:01:47,983
which is what blood does
when it's not keeping you alive.
22
00:01:48,901 --> 00:01:51,987
Blood and air. Blood and guts.
23
00:01:52,613 --> 00:01:55,448
Blood and brains are required
right now.
24
00:01:55,449 --> 00:02:02,539
The brains and the hands of the surgeon
who is standing over me.
25
00:02:03,081 --> 00:02:05,374
The man is climbing up to my chest,
26
00:02:05,375 --> 00:02:12,299
wielding his blade with the combined
forces of science and butchery.
27
00:02:12,799 --> 00:02:15,343
"Your man has a lot of firepower
28
00:02:15,344 --> 00:02:17,345
in that war chest of his."
29
00:02:17,346 --> 00:02:20,890
"We needed extra-strong wire
to sew him up.
30
00:02:20,891 --> 00:02:27,356
He's probably at 130%
of normal lung capacity for his age."
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00:02:40,410 --> 00:02:43,705
Air is stamina.
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00:02:45,332 --> 00:02:52,088
Air is the confidence
to take on big challenges.
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00:02:52,089 --> 00:02:56,259
Air is not the will
to conquer Everest
34
00:02:56,260 --> 00:03:00,888
but the ability to endure the climb.
35
00:03:00,889 --> 00:03:05,561
And here I am now
without it for the first time.
36
00:03:07,646 --> 00:03:09,022
Without breath.
37
00:03:09,773 --> 00:03:14,444
The names we give God. All breath.
38
00:03:15,112 --> 00:03:21,618
Jehovah. Allah. Yeshua.
39
00:03:22,536 --> 00:03:26,123
I'm without air, and I'm terrified.
40
00:03:27,708 --> 00:03:29,418
Because for the first time,
41
00:03:30,502 --> 00:03:34,965
I reach for Yeshua,
42
00:03:36,383 --> 00:03:39,595
and Yeshua is not there.
43
00:03:41,513 --> 00:03:46,685
It's an extraordinary thing
to ask the silence to save you.
44
00:03:48,854 --> 00:03:50,647
To reveal itself to you.
45
00:03:52,441 --> 00:03:55,861
To discover if there's a face
to that silence.
46
00:03:59,406 --> 00:04:01,200
But in this moment,
47
00:04:02,117 --> 00:04:05,495
God seems to have gone missing.
48
00:04:08,457 --> 00:04:09,666
Where am I?
49
00:04:12,336 --> 00:04:13,795
Without air.
50
00:04:15,172 --> 00:04:16,964
Without a prayer.
51
00:04:18,050 --> 00:04:20,636
Without an aria.
52
00:04:21,178 --> 00:04:26,308
How did I get here?
53
00:04:30,562 --> 00:04:32,773
New York, New York!
54
00:04:33,857 --> 00:04:39,696
74th and Broadway,
let the Beacon light our way.
55
00:04:44,034 --> 00:04:46,244
Lights go down, it's dark
56
00:04:46,245 --> 00:04:49,914
The jungle is your head
Can't rule your heart
57
00:04:49,915 --> 00:04:52,792
A feeling's so much stronger
Than a thought
58
00:04:52,793 --> 00:04:54,085
Your eyes are wide
59
00:04:54,086 --> 00:04:56,295
And though your soul
It can't be bought
60
00:04:56,296 --> 00:04:57,839
Your mind can wander
61
00:04:57,840 --> 00:05:00,424
Hello, hello
62
00:05:00,425 --> 00:05:01,509
Hola!
63
00:05:01,510 --> 00:05:04,346
I'm a place called Vertigo
64
00:05:05,514 --> 00:05:07,682
It's everything
I wish I didn't know
65
00:05:07,683 --> 00:05:10,977
But you give me something
66
00:05:10,978 --> 00:05:14,940
I can feel
67
00:05:18,235 --> 00:05:20,528
The night is full of holes
68
00:05:20,529 --> 00:05:24,073
As bullets rip the sky
Of ink with gold
69
00:05:24,074 --> 00:05:27,451
They sparkle as the boys
Play rock and roll
70
00:05:27,452 --> 00:05:30,913
They know that they can't dance
At least they know
71
00:05:30,914 --> 00:05:34,667
I can't stand the beats
I'm asking for the cheque
72
00:05:34,668 --> 00:05:37,879
Girl with crimson nails
Got Jesus 'round her neck
73
00:05:37,880 --> 00:05:41,425
Swinging to the music
Swinging to the music
74
00:05:46,346 --> 00:05:48,514
Hello, hello
75
00:05:48,515 --> 00:05:49,807
Hola!
76
00:05:49,808 --> 00:05:51,894
I'm at a place called Vertigo
77
00:05:53,061 --> 00:05:55,897
It's everything
I wish I didn't know
78
00:05:55,898 --> 00:05:58,983
But you give me something
79
00:05:58,984 --> 00:06:03,155
I can feel
80
00:06:06,074 --> 00:06:10,829
Feel
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00:06:13,165 --> 00:06:16,376
All of this,
all of this can be yours
82
00:06:17,044 --> 00:06:20,047
All of this,
all of this can be yours
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00:06:20,547 --> 00:06:23,549
All of this,
all of this can be yours
84
00:06:23,550 --> 00:06:26,970
Just give me what I want
And no one gets
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00:06:29,306 --> 00:06:30,474
Hurt
86
00:06:36,480 --> 00:06:39,983
Yeah, thank you. I am still
pretending that this is a book tour.
87
00:06:46,240 --> 00:06:47,241
Oh, yes.
88
00:06:49,201 --> 00:06:51,953
- Hola.
- Hola!
89
00:06:51,954 --> 00:06:55,123
Welcome to my quarterman show.
90
00:06:56,667 --> 00:07:01,129
And might I say,
this feels somewhat transgresivo
91
00:07:02,130 --> 00:07:04,924
to meet you here without my bandmates.
92
00:07:04,925 --> 00:07:09,178
A lot of you know when U2 go on tour,
93
00:07:09,179 --> 00:07:12,599
it can involve some outsize props.
94
00:07:14,351 --> 00:07:20,816
A giant claw,
space stations, mirrorball lemons.
95
00:07:21,900 --> 00:07:25,070
Tonight, I have a table and chairs.
96
00:07:26,196 --> 00:07:30,157
And the Jacknife Lee ensemble
97
00:07:30,158 --> 00:07:34,704
featuring Kate Ellis on the cello
and extraordinariness
98
00:07:34,705 --> 00:07:39,376
and Gemma Doherty on the harp
and other heavenly voices.
99
00:07:40,043 --> 00:07:44,840
Now, turns out the most extraordinary
thing about my life
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00:07:45,340 --> 00:07:48,176
is the people I'm in relationships with.
101
00:07:48,177 --> 00:07:52,347
I met most of them the same week
102
00:07:52,931 --> 00:07:56,602
I began life with my wife, Ali.
103
00:07:57,102 --> 00:08:00,397
The same week I joined U2.
104
00:08:02,274 --> 00:08:04,568
That's right. Excuse me, darling.
105
00:08:05,277 --> 00:08:10,574
One week during high school,
and my whole life sorted.
106
00:08:11,658 --> 00:08:12,492
Sort of.
107
00:08:14,411 --> 00:08:20,792
Alison Patricia Stewart had faith.
Even more absurdly, faith in me.
108
00:08:21,293 --> 00:08:26,381
This 15-year-old girl not just
suffered my demonic dreams,
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00:08:26,965 --> 00:08:31,511
she encouraged her boyfriend,
as he told anyone who would listen
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00:08:31,512 --> 00:08:38,143
that his band were gonna be big
when he felt so, so small.
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00:08:39,269 --> 00:08:42,981
These are the tall tales
of a short rock star.
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00:08:56,203 --> 00:08:57,496
Yeah
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00:08:58,622 --> 00:09:01,083
The more you see the less you know
114
00:09:02,042 --> 00:09:04,962
The less you find out as you grow
115
00:09:05,838 --> 00:09:10,551
I knew much more then than I do now
116
00:09:13,220 --> 00:09:16,264
Neon heart, DayGlo eyes
117
00:09:16,265 --> 00:09:19,308
A city lit by fireflies
118
00:09:19,309 --> 00:09:23,437
They were advertising
in the skies
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00:09:23,438 --> 00:09:25,732
For people like us
120
00:09:27,985 --> 00:09:33,991
And I miss you when
you're not around
121
00:09:35,284 --> 00:09:41,456
I'm getting ready to leave the...
building.
122
00:09:42,583 --> 00:09:46,378
Back then,
I was dreaming about this future.
123
00:09:46,920 --> 00:09:47,921
It's so beautiful.
124
00:09:48,422 --> 00:09:52,134
Lately,
I've been dreaming about the past.
125
00:09:53,010 --> 00:09:56,262
A past that might
keep me from the present.
126
00:09:56,263 --> 00:10:00,057
Oh, you look so
127
00:10:00,058 --> 00:10:03,728
Beautiful tonight
128
00:10:03,729 --> 00:10:07,190
- Oh
- You look so
129
00:10:07,191 --> 00:10:11,278
Beautiful tonight
130
00:10:12,529 --> 00:10:14,780
I see my mother scolding me.
131
00:10:14,781 --> 00:10:18,492
"You're making a show out of yourself.
You're making a show out of yourself."
132
00:10:18,493 --> 00:10:21,205
But that's what
I wanna do with my life.
133
00:10:21,747 --> 00:10:24,458
And the da,
rolling his eyes on that one.
134
00:10:27,044 --> 00:10:30,129
My da was a Catholic.
135
00:10:30,130 --> 00:10:35,427
A Catholic who loved
Protestant things like my mother.
136
00:10:36,220 --> 00:10:40,140
When they got married, his own family
didn't turn up at the wedding.
137
00:10:40,849 --> 00:10:44,186
Ireland was an unforgiving place
in those days,
138
00:10:44,686 --> 00:10:48,774
but Bob wasn't very concerned
with the outside world.
139
00:10:55,948 --> 00:11:00,369
My father was a tenor.
A really, really good one.
140
00:11:01,453 --> 00:11:03,371
He could move people with his singing.
141
00:11:03,372 --> 00:11:09,002
And to move people with music,
you first have to be moved by it.
142
00:11:10,295 --> 00:11:14,715
I see my father standing
in the living room of 10 Cedarwood Road
143
00:11:14,716 --> 00:11:20,429
in front of the stereo
with two of my mother's knitting needles,
144
00:11:20,430 --> 00:11:25,310
conducting Beethoven, Mozart, Verdi.
145
00:11:26,562 --> 00:11:30,941
Right now,
he's listening to La Traviata.
146
00:11:34,987 --> 00:11:40,533
On stage at Teatro di San Carlo,
Sorrento.
147
00:11:40,534 --> 00:11:43,244
He's not precisely aware of the story,
148
00:11:43,245 --> 00:11:45,329
but he feels it,
149
00:11:45,330 --> 00:11:51,210
a father and son at odds,
lovers cast away and returned.
150
00:11:51,211 --> 00:11:55,591
He senses the injustice
of the human heart.
151
00:11:56,091 --> 00:11:59,011
His heart is broken by the music.
152
00:11:59,928 --> 00:12:01,053
I'll spend most of my life
153
00:12:01,054 --> 00:12:05,141
trying to figure out the opera
playing inside my father's head.
154
00:12:05,142 --> 00:12:09,061
He doesn't really notice much else,
155
00:12:09,062 --> 00:12:14,651
least of all me,
age ten, just staring up at him.
156
00:12:15,819 --> 00:12:21,741
Now, if you want your child to grow up
to be a grandstanding stadium singer,
157
00:12:21,742 --> 00:12:23,993
there are a couple
of ways to go about it.
158
00:12:23,994 --> 00:12:28,831
You can tell them they're gifted, they--
that the world needs to hear their voice.
159
00:12:28,832 --> 00:12:31,960
This is the Italian method.
160
00:12:33,003 --> 00:12:35,589
Or you can completely ignore them.
161
00:12:36,131 --> 00:12:40,844
This can be the Irish method,
much more effective in my case.
162
00:12:41,512 --> 00:12:45,640
I craved my father's attention.
163
00:12:45,641 --> 00:12:49,478
I wanted him
to think that I had music in me too.
164
00:12:50,312 --> 00:12:52,856
He didn't hear me,
165
00:12:53,565 --> 00:12:57,694
so I sang louder and louder.
166
00:12:58,403 --> 00:13:04,409
In fact, you could say I sang my way
to right in front of you tonight.
167
00:13:06,620 --> 00:13:07,621
Thanks, Da.
168
00:13:09,039 --> 00:13:13,335
My father had some very good reasons
for staying lost in his own world.
169
00:13:14,837 --> 00:13:18,589
I think we're gonna need
some harp music for this next bit.
170
00:13:18,590 --> 00:13:20,175
It's the tragic part.
171
00:13:26,932 --> 00:13:30,352
My mother, Iris,
died when I was 14.
172
00:13:31,645 --> 00:13:36,524
Last time I saw her alive was
at her own father's funeral.
173
00:13:36,525 --> 00:13:39,527
This sounds almost too Irish,
I know,
174
00:13:39,528 --> 00:13:43,782
but this is my story.
I'm stuck with it.
175
00:13:45,534 --> 00:13:49,788
As my grandfather's casket
was being lowered into the ground,
176
00:13:50,372 --> 00:13:51,747
my mother collapsed.
177
00:13:51,748 --> 00:13:58,547
I stood watching as my father and
my older brother carried her to the car,
178
00:14:00,007 --> 00:14:04,678
drove her to the hospital,
where she died of an aneurysm.
179
00:14:05,262 --> 00:14:06,263
It happens.
180
00:14:06,972 --> 00:14:10,100
I felt useless, so I prayed.
181
00:14:11,226 --> 00:14:17,191
My father's response to this tragedy
was to never speak of her again.
182
00:14:18,567 --> 00:14:23,739
With Iris gone, our home at number 10
is becoming its own opera.
183
00:14:24,948 --> 00:14:26,115
I'm locked in a house
184
00:14:26,116 --> 00:14:31,663
where three men
are living in rage and melancholy.
185
00:14:32,998 --> 00:14:38,253
A house where the name
of our grief is never spoken.
186
00:14:39,546 --> 00:14:40,964
Iris.
187
00:14:41,798 --> 00:14:44,468
My mother's name is Iris.
188
00:14:46,345 --> 00:14:52,350
The house became a river of silence
in which I might have drowned
189
00:14:52,351 --> 00:14:58,481
had my big brother, Norman,
not thrown me a lifeline.
190
00:14:58,482 --> 00:15:01,735
He gave me a guitar, his guitar.
191
00:15:02,528 --> 00:15:06,990
A shield. A weapon. A confidant.
192
00:15:08,325 --> 00:15:11,203
Another voice to pray with. Music.
193
00:15:22,631 --> 00:15:25,259
I am jumping around the living room
194
00:15:26,927 --> 00:15:30,429
to the sound of the Ramones'
Leave Home album.
195
00:15:30,430 --> 00:15:34,517
Songs so simple, and yet
they capture how my life feels to me.
196
00:15:34,518 --> 00:15:40,941
Songs so simple that even
I might be able to write one.
197
00:15:41,733 --> 00:15:47,989
It's May 10, 1978.
Today is my 18th birthday.
198
00:15:47,990 --> 00:15:49,448
We don't do cakes.
199
00:15:49,449 --> 00:15:54,705
Instead, the da wants to talk to me
about getting a job.
200
00:15:55,289 --> 00:15:56,706
A job.
201
00:15:56,707 --> 00:16:00,710
I know that
if I could do something I love,
202
00:16:00,711 --> 00:16:03,671
I would never have to work
a day in my life.
203
00:16:03,672 --> 00:16:06,800
But to do that,
you have to be great at something,
204
00:16:07,759 --> 00:16:11,054
and I'm not great at something.
I'm not great at anything.
205
00:16:12,389 --> 00:16:16,809
I'm smart enough
to know I'm not smart enough.
206
00:16:16,810 --> 00:16:20,647
The Ramones are smart enough
to play dumb.
207
00:16:21,398 --> 00:16:24,860
Maybe I need to listen
to even more Ramones.
208
00:16:25,611 --> 00:16:30,782
This is the day I'm gonna write
my very first proper rock-and-roll song.
209
00:16:31,700 --> 00:16:34,327
It will become U2's first single.
It will save my life.
210
00:16:34,328 --> 00:16:35,996
It is called "Out of Control."
211
00:16:37,831 --> 00:16:43,836
Monday morning,
18 years of dawning
212
00:16:43,837 --> 00:16:46,548
I say how long
213
00:16:47,591 --> 00:16:49,593
Say how long
214
00:16:50,969 --> 00:16:53,930
It was one dull morning
215
00:16:53,931 --> 00:16:57,350
Woke the world with bawling
216
00:16:57,351 --> 00:16:59,561
I was so sad
217
00:17:00,812 --> 00:17:02,731
They were so glad
218
00:17:04,566 --> 00:17:08,110
Yeah, I had spirit
and we had soul
219
00:17:08,111 --> 00:17:12,281
Even then I was out of control
220
00:17:19,790 --> 00:17:22,542
Hey, I can do this.
221
00:17:27,422 --> 00:17:29,049
Stories for
222
00:17:30,008 --> 00:17:34,471
"Drummer seeks musicians
to form band."
223
00:17:35,472 --> 00:17:37,598
Stories for boys
224
00:17:37,599 --> 00:17:42,563
Let me introduce you
to Larry Mullen Jr.
225
00:17:43,981 --> 00:17:49,861
Now, most people who enter the room
with Larry Mullen find him striking
226
00:17:49,862 --> 00:17:54,991
in the sense that he is a stylish,
good-looking member of the species,
227
00:17:54,992 --> 00:17:59,954
but also in the sense
that he can be strikingly suspicious
228
00:17:59,955 --> 00:18:02,498
of you being in his gaze,
229
00:18:02,499 --> 00:18:05,126
of you being in the room,
230
00:18:05,127 --> 00:18:09,172
and perhaps, on a bad day,
your reason for being anywhere at all.
231
00:18:09,173 --> 00:18:13,509
But when Larry loves people,
he loves them completely,
232
00:18:13,510 --> 00:18:18,182
and I'm grateful to have become
one of the beneficiaries of that love.
233
00:18:18,849 --> 00:18:21,350
Now, David Evans.
234
00:18:21,351 --> 00:18:27,815
Sometimes the name you're given at birth
just isn't your real name, is it?
235
00:18:27,816 --> 00:18:31,903
David Evans was always the Edge.
Always the Edge.
236
00:18:31,904 --> 00:18:37,241
1976, he was 15,
a year younger than me.
237
00:18:37,242 --> 00:18:42,663
He was leaning up against the wall
at Mount Temple Comprehensive,
238
00:18:42,664 --> 00:18:46,084
plucking a complicated guitar line.
239
00:18:46,793 --> 00:18:49,795
He was in class with Alison Stewart,
my future wife,
240
00:18:49,796 --> 00:18:52,340
and it was said that
they were the smartest in their year,
241
00:18:52,341 --> 00:18:57,721
that he had a crush on her,
that they might have gone for walks.
242
00:18:58,722 --> 00:19:03,185
Decided right then, I was keeping
an eye on this guitar genius.
243
00:19:03,810 --> 00:19:09,358
Now, let me introduce you
to Adam Clayton,
244
00:19:11,443 --> 00:19:13,820
a true believer in rock and roll.
245
00:19:15,072 --> 00:19:19,451
Only one commandment,
four strings are better than six.
246
00:19:20,494 --> 00:19:24,038
He had the style,
the attitude, the ambition,
247
00:19:24,039 --> 00:19:27,333
only problem was he couldn't play,
248
00:19:27,334 --> 00:19:30,254
which wasn't a problem,
as I couldn't sing.
249
00:19:32,381 --> 00:19:35,759
Stories for boys
250
00:19:42,975 --> 00:19:48,480
There's a place I go
That isn't part of me
251
00:19:49,731 --> 00:19:55,445
Like a radio with no controls
252
00:19:56,154 --> 00:20:00,074
In my imagination
253
00:20:00,075 --> 00:20:04,872
There's only static and flow
254
00:20:05,581 --> 00:20:09,001
No yes or no
255
00:20:09,710 --> 00:20:13,130
The stories for boys
256
00:20:13,630 --> 00:20:16,717
Stories for boys
257
00:20:17,384 --> 00:20:20,679
Stories for boys
258
00:20:26,810 --> 00:20:31,607
U2's rehearsal room was
a small cottage,
259
00:20:32,107 --> 00:20:36,569
backing onto a graveyard
in north County Dublin.
260
00:20:36,570 --> 00:20:42,451
Same graveyard that my mother was
buried in. We called it the Yellow House.
261
00:20:43,660 --> 00:20:50,000
Today, not for the first time,
I've been screaming at my bandmates.
262
00:20:52,669 --> 00:20:58,966
Forget Ireland bursting
into paramilitary flames. No, no.
263
00:20:58,967 --> 00:21:04,180
On this day, in the winter of 1978,
264
00:21:04,181 --> 00:21:08,559
the most pressing issue
facing all of humanity
265
00:21:08,560 --> 00:21:13,439
is that this band
are not being good enough musicians,
266
00:21:13,440 --> 00:21:15,692
as if I was.
267
00:21:16,818 --> 00:21:20,112
Trying to explain
to them how excited I am
268
00:21:20,113 --> 00:21:23,908
about the new Public Image Ltd song.
269
00:21:23,909 --> 00:21:28,454
A great song, I explain, like I know,
270
00:21:28,455 --> 00:21:32,793
can be written
on two strings over two chords.
271
00:21:33,418 --> 00:21:38,674
I'm trying to get Edge to make the sound
of an electric drill into your brain,
272
00:21:39,550 --> 00:21:43,929
like a chainsaw through
the carcass of the past.
273
00:21:46,098 --> 00:21:48,267
Edge is not following the invective.
274
00:21:48,851 --> 00:21:53,896
In fact, Edge is losing patience,
and I'm becoming even more invected,
275
00:21:53,897 --> 00:21:59,945
so invected that I grab
his Gibson Explorer from him
276
00:22:01,405 --> 00:22:03,824
and wrap it around my own neck
277
00:22:04,408 --> 00:22:08,287
to start making
a dangerous squeal of a sound.
278
00:22:14,543 --> 00:22:19,339
"Go on. Go on," says Edge.
"Keep it coming. You're nearly there."
279
00:22:20,632 --> 00:22:22,050
You like it?
280
00:22:22,676 --> 00:22:28,056
"I'm not sure I like it, but it does
sound like a dentist drilling your brain.
281
00:22:29,224 --> 00:22:33,812
Here, let me take it.
Let me see if I can take it somewhere."
282
00:22:34,938 --> 00:22:39,400
In this ego-filled and egoless moment,
283
00:22:39,401 --> 00:22:40,861
a song is forming.
284
00:22:42,029 --> 00:22:44,655
A song that will be called
"I Will Follow."
285
00:22:44,656 --> 00:22:48,159
If you walk away, walk away.
Walk away, walk away.
286
00:22:48,160 --> 00:22:51,913
It's like a rhythm hook.
You know, like a wah-wah pedal.
287
00:22:51,914 --> 00:22:55,333
Walk away, walk away, walk away.
I will follow.
288
00:22:55,334 --> 00:22:58,336
Edge is turning my graffiti
289
00:22:58,337 --> 00:23:02,423
into some Raphael Mother
and fucking Child,
290
00:23:02,424 --> 00:23:07,136
and Larry and Adam
are burning down the gallery.
291
00:23:07,137 --> 00:23:08,429
That's right.
292
00:23:08,430 --> 00:23:13,477
Come on, let's find the thing
that we can do that no one else can do.
293
00:23:14,102 --> 00:23:16,979
Adam, you can do that.
294
00:23:16,980 --> 00:23:18,856
We can do this thing.
295
00:23:18,857 --> 00:23:20,900
Edge, we can do this thing.
296
00:23:20,901 --> 00:23:25,489
Adam, Larry, if you walk away,
walk away.
297
00:23:26,073 --> 00:23:31,912
If you walk away, walk away.
If you walk away, walk away.
298
00:23:38,502 --> 00:23:41,504
On the drums, Larry Mullen.
299
00:23:41,505 --> 00:23:44,423
On the bass, Adam Clayton, Edge.
300
00:23:44,424 --> 00:23:47,094
"I Will Follow."
301
00:23:52,140 --> 00:23:58,021
Oh, man. Sorry about that,
Edge, Larry, Adam.
302
00:23:59,481 --> 00:24:02,401
What a complete fucking eejit I was.
303
00:24:03,235 --> 00:24:04,444
I'm working on it though.
304
00:24:07,948 --> 00:24:09,449
Truth is you're...
305
00:24:11,577 --> 00:24:13,745
you're really great.
306
00:24:17,040 --> 00:24:22,921
But what no one in that rehearsal room,
including me, had thought about
307
00:24:24,047 --> 00:24:26,216
was Iris Hewson resting...
308
00:24:28,552 --> 00:24:30,929
not a hundred yards
from where we were playing.
309
00:24:32,264 --> 00:24:34,932
In all the time we rehearsed
in the Yellow House,
310
00:24:34,933 --> 00:24:37,728
I never thought about her.
311
00:24:38,562 --> 00:24:40,689
Never once visited her grave.
312
00:24:41,857 --> 00:24:45,360
It wasn't like she was dead.
313
00:24:45,861 --> 00:24:47,571
It was worse.
314
00:24:48,197 --> 00:24:53,869
We disappeared her,
but Iris would not be denied.
315
00:24:54,786 --> 00:24:57,039
No, not in the music.
316
00:25:02,711 --> 00:25:04,296
Iris standing in the hall.
317
00:25:06,089 --> 00:25:08,133
She tells me I can do it all.
318
00:25:11,595 --> 00:25:13,055
Don't fear the world
319
00:25:14,515 --> 00:25:15,516
it isn't there.
320
00:25:16,683 --> 00:25:18,143
Iris playing on the strand.
321
00:25:20,270 --> 00:25:22,231
She buries the boy
322
00:25:22,773 --> 00:25:24,233
beneath the sand.
323
00:25:25,859 --> 00:25:27,569
Iris says that I will be
324
00:25:29,613 --> 00:25:30,822
the death of her.
325
00:25:33,075 --> 00:25:35,494
But it wasn't fucking me.
326
00:25:42,167 --> 00:25:47,755
Let me tell you something
about the geometry
327
00:25:47,756 --> 00:25:50,967
and the geography of the Irish mind.
328
00:25:50,968 --> 00:25:55,973
The Irish mind is best understood
as being like an Irish pub.
329
00:25:56,473 --> 00:26:01,227
You go to forget, but in the end,
you're drowning in memories,
330
00:26:01,228 --> 00:26:04,022
and salt-and-vinegar crisps...
331
00:26:05,065 --> 00:26:06,316
and black stuff.
332
00:26:07,067 --> 00:26:09,819
Finnegan's pub is not just my local,
333
00:26:09,820 --> 00:26:14,073
it is its own country
with its own laws and customs.
334
00:26:14,074 --> 00:26:17,743
It is the domain of Dan Finnegan
and his sons.
335
00:26:17,744 --> 00:26:22,373
It's a constitutional monarchy,
with Dan head of state
336
00:26:22,374 --> 00:26:24,793
and his sons running the government.
337
00:26:25,294 --> 00:26:29,088
There is a code, a strictness,
a reverence for tradition.
338
00:26:29,089 --> 00:26:32,092
Indeed, a respect for opera
339
00:26:32,593 --> 00:26:36,972
and for the kind of man who might know
how to wear tweed,
340
00:26:37,556 --> 00:26:38,974
like my father, Bob.
341
00:26:39,808 --> 00:26:44,771
Now, within the nation of Finnegan's--
Like my father, Bob.
342
00:26:45,689 --> 00:26:52,153
Now, within the nation of Finnegan's
there is a small Italian consulate,
343
00:26:52,154 --> 00:26:53,447
the Sorrento Lounge
344
00:26:54,031 --> 00:26:57,867
which is where, on a Sunday,
I would meet my father for a drink.
345
00:26:57,868 --> 00:26:59,577
I would order a pint.
346
00:26:59,578 --> 00:27:03,539
He, the Catholic, would order
Black Bush, a Protestant whiskey.
347
00:27:03,540 --> 00:27:09,921
Already a subtle signal that
Brendan Robert Hewson was his own man
348
00:27:09,922 --> 00:27:15,260
and one with
a great opening line every single time.
349
00:27:19,223 --> 00:27:23,769
"Anything strange or startling?"
350
00:27:24,353 --> 00:27:26,479
Now, by strange or startling,
351
00:27:26,480 --> 00:27:30,150
he was not interested in the riotous
life of a rock-and-roll singer.
352
00:27:30,734 --> 00:27:34,154
Mostly we sat in silence.
353
00:27:55,968 --> 00:27:57,261
I try to impress him.
354
00:27:58,220 --> 00:28:02,723
How about Luciano Pavarotti
calling the house?
355
00:28:02,724 --> 00:28:05,936
You consider that strange
or startling?
356
00:28:06,770 --> 00:28:09,648
"Startling, that's obvious.
357
00:28:10,482 --> 00:28:16,029
Strange? Yeah. Why would a great
tenor be calling you? No offense."
358
00:28:16,989 --> 00:28:23,328
None taken. Actually,
he's looking for a song.
359
00:28:24,204 --> 00:28:26,789
"Did he dial the wrong number?"
360
00:28:26,790 --> 00:28:30,918
No. He wants me,
361
00:28:30,919 --> 00:28:33,880
with a little help from Edge,
to write him a song. Yeah.
362
00:28:33,881 --> 00:28:37,258
Not Gilbert and Sullivan
or Rodgers and Hammerstein.
363
00:28:37,259 --> 00:28:41,138
Me, B-O-N-O, Paul.
364
00:28:43,765 --> 00:28:49,730
"You? A baritone who thinks
he's a tenor?"
365
00:28:51,148 --> 00:28:52,149
Me.
366
00:28:52,649 --> 00:28:58,238
Pavarotti wants me to write him a song.
Now who's the fucking eejit?
367
00:29:01,992 --> 00:29:02,993
"He is."
368
00:29:06,538 --> 00:29:09,124
Gloria
369
00:29:11,251 --> 00:29:15,631
In te domine
370
00:29:18,175 --> 00:29:19,927
Gloria
371
00:29:20,636 --> 00:29:25,932
Exultate
372
00:29:25,933 --> 00:29:30,853
Mount Temple Comprehensive School
was a nondenominational,
373
00:29:30,854 --> 00:29:33,481
coeducational experiment.
374
00:29:33,482 --> 00:29:38,861
In a country that was close
to civil war along sectarian lines,
375
00:29:38,862 --> 00:29:42,991
we had Catholics and Protestants
in the same class.
376
00:29:44,117 --> 00:29:46,702
You were encouraged to be yourself,
377
00:29:46,703 --> 00:29:51,123
to be creative,
to wear your own clothes,
378
00:29:51,124 --> 00:29:55,545
and there were girls.
379
00:29:55,546 --> 00:29:58,590
Also, wearing their own clothes.
380
00:29:59,466 --> 00:30:03,594
Ironically,
amid this freedom from religion,
381
00:30:03,595 --> 00:30:05,096
we found ourselves getting religion.
382
00:30:05,097 --> 00:30:09,351
We got close to a group
of Christian radicals called "Shalom."
383
00:30:10,227 --> 00:30:15,565
They figured all the established churches
had not just gotten away from Jesus,
384
00:30:15,566 --> 00:30:19,194
but they had got in the way of Jesus.
385
00:30:20,654 --> 00:30:22,405
As U2 started to get popular,
386
00:30:22,406 --> 00:30:28,077
our first-century Christian brethren began
suggesting that our music was frivolous
387
00:30:28,078 --> 00:30:30,204
and self-flattering.
388
00:30:30,205 --> 00:30:32,708
In other words, fun.
389
00:30:34,501 --> 00:30:39,464
We asked the question, "Can we not
change the world and have fun?"
390
00:30:41,425 --> 00:30:47,973
"No. You must choose between
this world and the next."
391
00:30:50,350 --> 00:30:56,230
Eventually, it became too much for us,
particularly Edge.
392
00:30:56,231 --> 00:31:00,860
He couldn't live with the tension
between being a disciple of Jesus
393
00:31:00,861 --> 00:31:04,405
and an apostle of Joey Ramone.
394
00:31:04,406 --> 00:31:08,493
He eventually decided
to leave the band.
395
00:31:09,786 --> 00:31:11,580
I felt conflicted too.
396
00:31:12,206 --> 00:31:16,209
I had no interest
in carrying on in U2 without Edge.
397
00:31:16,210 --> 00:31:20,088
Larry sympathized with us both.
398
00:31:20,881 --> 00:31:23,841
Adam did not.
399
00:31:23,842 --> 00:31:30,557
One album and done,
like the Sex Pistols.
400
00:31:34,102 --> 00:31:38,440
Now we just had to tell our manager.
401
00:31:39,358 --> 00:31:41,944
Have I told you about Paul McGuinness?
402
00:31:42,945 --> 00:31:46,572
Paul McGuinness,
the Winston Churchill of Rock.
403
00:31:46,573 --> 00:31:48,574
I mean, he went to war for U2.
404
00:31:48,575 --> 00:31:50,910
He had just taken us
once around the world,
405
00:31:50,911 --> 00:31:54,622
so we really,
really weren't looking forward
406
00:31:54,623 --> 00:32:01,463
to telling him that we were breaking up
his baby band just as they hit puberty.
407
00:32:02,130 --> 00:32:05,384
But he heard us out.
408
00:32:06,051 --> 00:32:07,678
There was a pause,
409
00:32:08,804 --> 00:32:15,352
some fidgeting,
a slap on the face. His.
410
00:32:16,019 --> 00:32:17,395
And then came,
411
00:32:17,396 --> 00:32:23,777
"Am I to gather from this
that you've been talking to God?
412
00:32:26,029 --> 00:32:31,784
Well, maybe the next time
you ring God,
413
00:32:31,785 --> 00:32:35,705
you might ask him, or her,
414
00:32:35,706 --> 00:32:40,960
if it's okay for your representative
on Earth-- i.e., me--
415
00:32:40,961 --> 00:32:43,463
to renege on a legal contract.
416
00:32:45,132 --> 00:32:50,720
Do you think God would have you break
a legal contract, is my question.
417
00:32:50,721 --> 00:32:55,433
A contract that I have signed
on your behalf to go on tour.
418
00:32:55,434 --> 00:32:58,145
What sort of a God is that?"
419
00:33:01,023 --> 00:33:03,859
Hell of a negotiator,
Paul McGuinness.
420
00:33:04,776 --> 00:33:07,987
It wouldn't be the first time
we'd put words in God's mouth.
421
00:33:07,988 --> 00:33:10,198
The tour would indeed go ahead.
422
00:33:10,199 --> 00:33:12,868
And I was so heightened,
423
00:33:14,203 --> 00:33:20,917
I convinced my 21-year-old
girlfriend to get married.
424
00:33:20,918 --> 00:33:24,588
Unbelievably, she said yes.
425
00:33:29,801 --> 00:33:33,012
Now, Edge, he had some fun too,
426
00:33:33,013 --> 00:33:37,266
but Edge was still not sure he wanted
427
00:33:37,267 --> 00:33:40,728
to be in a business of inflamed egos
428
00:33:40,729 --> 00:33:43,440
and pumped-up personalities.
429
00:33:44,399 --> 00:33:47,986
I asked him,
would he make an exception for me?
430
00:33:49,988 --> 00:33:52,448
Arpeggiating his way out of a corner,
431
00:33:52,449 --> 00:33:55,117
Edge began working on
the sketch of a song.
432
00:33:55,118 --> 00:34:00,290
Well, not just a song, a map.
A way forward for U2 in the world.
433
00:34:01,208 --> 00:34:05,546
"Sunday, Bloody Sunday"
was religious art meets The Clash.
434
00:34:08,674 --> 00:34:13,262
But its ambition was to contrast
the original Easter Sunday
435
00:34:13,762 --> 00:34:18,516
with the massacre of 14 unarmed
protesters in the city of Derry.
436
00:34:20,853 --> 00:34:22,562
While Edge was in his flat in Dublin,
437
00:34:22,563 --> 00:34:26,775
I was with my bride in Jamaica,
writing lyrics for these new songs,
438
00:34:27,734 --> 00:34:31,572
explaining to Ali why our honeymoon
album was gonna be called War.
439
00:34:34,824 --> 00:34:38,245
I can't believe the news today
440
00:34:41,206 --> 00:34:46,879
I can't close my eyes,
make it go away
441
00:34:48,338 --> 00:34:50,090
How long
442
00:34:51,007 --> 00:34:53,719
How long must we sing this song?
443
00:34:55,304 --> 00:34:58,891
How long, how long?
444
00:35:03,270 --> 00:35:06,899
Tonight
445
00:35:07,566 --> 00:35:09,610
We can be as one
446
00:35:10,652 --> 00:35:15,449
Tonight, tonight
447
00:35:19,119 --> 00:35:22,497
Broken bottles
under children's feet
448
00:35:25,918 --> 00:35:31,215
Bodies strewn across
The dead-end street
449
00:35:32,090 --> 00:35:36,637
I won't heed the battle call
450
00:35:39,973 --> 00:35:41,933
Puts my back up
451
00:35:41,934 --> 00:35:45,479
My back up against the wall
452
00:35:46,939 --> 00:35:51,777
Sunday, bloody Sunday
453
00:35:54,321 --> 00:35:58,534
Sunday, bloody Sunday
454
00:36:01,703 --> 00:36:06,124
Sunday, bloody Sunday
455
00:36:08,919 --> 00:36:12,588
- Sunday
- Bloody Sunday
456
00:36:12,589 --> 00:36:17,469
Here she comes
457
00:36:19,972 --> 00:36:26,979
Here she comes
458
00:36:28,480 --> 00:36:35,070
Here she comes, yeah
459
00:36:36,280 --> 00:36:40,700
Here she
460
00:36:40,701 --> 00:36:43,996
Comes
461
00:36:45,664 --> 00:36:48,125
I'm here at the murder scene
462
00:36:51,879 --> 00:36:54,006
The beginning of a fiction
463
00:36:55,048 --> 00:36:57,009
Facts will not complete
464
00:36:59,928 --> 00:37:04,183
Why so many mothers cry
465
00:37:06,101 --> 00:37:08,519
Is religion now the enemy
466
00:37:08,520 --> 00:37:11,815
Of the Holy Spirit guide?
467
00:37:13,901 --> 00:37:17,487
The real battle yet begun
468
00:37:21,325 --> 00:37:26,496
Where is the victory Jesus
469
00:37:29,750 --> 00:37:32,794
Won?
470
00:37:42,346 --> 00:37:45,181
Something to know about performers:
471
00:37:45,182 --> 00:37:50,604
in pursuit of truth, we are capable
of more untruth than most.
472
00:37:51,605 --> 00:37:53,482
Cheers.
473
00:37:56,443 --> 00:37:57,486
Show business.
474
00:37:59,696 --> 00:38:01,822
Back in the Sorrento Lounge,
475
00:38:01,823 --> 00:38:04,701
the usual opening line from the da.
476
00:38:06,537 --> 00:38:10,582
"Anything strange or startling?"
477
00:38:11,250 --> 00:38:14,752
Everything is strange and startling.
478
00:38:14,753 --> 00:38:19,340
"Oh, you're right there.
I took a taxi out here today.
479
00:38:19,341 --> 00:38:21,926
The driver saw where I was going
480
00:38:21,927 --> 00:38:24,888
and asked if I knew Bono."
481
00:38:26,139 --> 00:38:28,433
"I said, 'I do not. Do you?'"
482
00:38:29,017 --> 00:38:33,396
"Sure, we all know Bono out here.
Sure. Isn't he hounded by the Pavarotti?"
483
00:38:33,397 --> 00:38:36,858
"Hounded. Hounded by the Pavarotti.
484
00:38:36,859 --> 00:38:40,529
I never heard that one.
Paparazzi, is it?"
485
00:38:42,281 --> 00:38:45,116
Funny you should say that.
486
00:38:45,117 --> 00:38:48,786
The great "Paparazzi" himself
has been calling the house again.
487
00:38:48,787 --> 00:38:54,293
This time, he wants us to perform
with him in his hometown of Modena
488
00:38:54,793 --> 00:38:59,046
to raise money for refugees
from the war in Bosnia.
489
00:38:59,047 --> 00:39:00,549
I mean, how do you say no to that?
490
00:39:01,133 --> 00:39:04,136
"For once, would you just do what
you're told?"
491
00:39:05,762 --> 00:39:07,221
I want to do what I'm told.
492
00:39:07,222 --> 00:39:12,059
But I'm also being told by the band
to stop getting distracted
493
00:39:12,060 --> 00:39:13,853
so we can finish a U2 album,
494
00:39:13,854 --> 00:39:15,564
rather than ones for Pavarotti.
495
00:39:17,024 --> 00:39:21,986
Let me explain
something about being in this band
496
00:39:21,987 --> 00:39:24,865
that even my da doesn't understand.
497
00:39:25,657 --> 00:39:31,705
The popular perception is that
I am the leader of U2. I wish.
498
00:39:33,081 --> 00:39:36,542
I voted that U2
should be an actual democracy.
499
00:39:36,543 --> 00:39:40,880
So, now I'm in a band
with three other people,
500
00:39:40,881 --> 00:39:43,967
each of whom
thinks he is the leader of U2.
501
00:39:45,093 --> 00:39:46,844
So, my wanting to do something
502
00:39:46,845 --> 00:39:50,849
does not necessarily mean
they are wanting to do something.
503
00:39:51,517 --> 00:39:54,311
Anyway, I'm telling this to the da.
504
00:39:54,811 --> 00:40:00,024
And, Da, the whole band was
in the studio in Hanover Quay
505
00:40:00,025 --> 00:40:03,403
when the phone rings, you know.
506
00:40:06,240 --> 00:40:10,993
"Bono, Bono, Bono. How are you?
507
00:40:10,994 --> 00:40:13,830
Are you weary from the mountaintop?
508
00:40:15,123 --> 00:40:19,962
Have you come down the mountaintop
with the tablets of rock and roll?"
509
00:40:21,588 --> 00:40:25,007
The new album.
Yeah, we're late as always.
510
00:40:25,008 --> 00:40:26,884
"You told me this,
511
00:40:26,885 --> 00:40:31,806
and dearest Bono,
that is why I am here to help."
512
00:40:31,807 --> 00:40:35,893
I'm sorry? You're in Dublin?
513
00:40:35,894 --> 00:40:41,524
"I am this very minute
in the Irish customs and exercise.
514
00:40:41,525 --> 00:40:44,151
I have told them
I have nothing to declare
515
00:40:44,152 --> 00:40:48,949
but my love of Bono, Edge,
James and Larry."
516
00:40:50,576 --> 00:40:54,328
"It is my sole purpose in this moment
517
00:40:54,329 --> 00:40:57,958
to be of service to these great men."
518
00:40:59,793 --> 00:41:02,336
Oh, maestro, they are great men
519
00:41:02,337 --> 00:41:06,299
and this is a great honor,
but it's not a great moment.
520
00:41:06,300 --> 00:41:08,844
"They don't like me?"
521
00:41:09,428 --> 00:41:12,263
It's worse. They don't care.
522
00:41:12,264 --> 00:41:14,140
I mean,
these are the children of punk rock.
523
00:41:14,141 --> 00:41:17,268
They will likely suspect
that you are just here
524
00:41:17,269 --> 00:41:20,230
to twist their arm
into going to Modena.
525
00:41:23,025 --> 00:41:24,483
"This pains me.
526
00:41:24,484 --> 00:41:29,030
I came only in genuflection
and cordiality,
527
00:41:29,031 --> 00:41:32,825
and now you question my motivation."
528
00:41:32,826 --> 00:41:35,620
No. No, maestro.
It's not like that.
529
00:41:35,621 --> 00:41:38,373
"Perfetto. I am on my way."
530
00:41:39,499 --> 00:41:43,045
Fuck. Fuck.
531
00:41:48,258 --> 00:41:52,553
I go to Edge, Adam and Larry,
532
00:41:52,554 --> 00:41:56,849
I say, "Look, he's the greatest
singer in the history of the world.
533
00:41:56,850 --> 00:42:02,898
It's a huge honor he's coming
to see us in the next half an hour."
534
00:42:04,858 --> 00:42:10,446
"The next half an hour? He might
be coming to see you," says Larry.
535
00:42:10,447 --> 00:42:11,865
"He's not coming to see us."
536
00:42:12,449 --> 00:42:15,952
"This is some kind of stunt,"
says Adam.
537
00:42:15,953 --> 00:42:20,790
"He'd likely show up with a photographer,
you know? We will not be coerced."
538
00:42:20,791 --> 00:42:22,333
What are you going to do? Hide?
539
00:42:22,334 --> 00:42:24,293
"No, we're not gonna hide,"
says Edge.
540
00:42:24,294 --> 00:42:28,381
"Actually," say Adam and Larry
in perfect unison,
541
00:42:28,382 --> 00:42:33,219
"that is exactly what we're gonna do.
We are going to hide."
542
00:42:33,220 --> 00:42:34,136
Sorry?
543
00:42:34,137 --> 00:42:38,225
And with that, two grown men hide
from Luciano Pavarotti.
544
00:42:38,725 --> 00:42:40,310
The buzzer rings...
545
00:42:43,355 --> 00:42:46,441
and there he stands. Oh, my God.
546
00:42:47,484 --> 00:42:52,739
The greatest singer in the history
of the wor--
547
00:42:55,534 --> 00:42:56,743
With a film crew.
548
00:42:58,120 --> 00:43:01,665
Seven or eight excited Italians.
One of them's crying.
549
00:43:02,791 --> 00:43:07,086
"Bono, Bono, Bono.
Edge, Edge. Bono, Edge.
550
00:43:07,087 --> 00:43:09,006
Where are James and Larry?"
551
00:43:10,382 --> 00:43:14,553
"These are my friends from Rai Uno.
They have a satellite dish
552
00:43:15,095 --> 00:43:18,181
in case we decide
to announce the show in Modena.
553
00:43:18,182 --> 00:43:19,850
I mean, while we're all together."
554
00:43:27,149 --> 00:43:30,943
"In what corner of the universe
555
00:43:30,944 --> 00:43:33,613
is the great Pavarotti
knocking on your door
556
00:43:33,614 --> 00:43:37,784
and you are not letting him in?
Has the world gone bloody mad?"
557
00:43:38,952 --> 00:43:44,248
Da, in my corner of the universe,
we very much let him in.
558
00:43:44,249 --> 00:43:45,917
In Edge's corner too.
559
00:43:45,918 --> 00:43:50,505
In fact, we're off to be part
of Pavarotti & Friends
560
00:43:50,506 --> 00:43:53,257
to support War Child in Modena.
561
00:43:53,258 --> 00:43:54,509
Yes.
562
00:43:54,510 --> 00:43:56,969
Adam and Larry are missing
in action on this one,
563
00:43:56,970 --> 00:44:01,016
but would you like to go?
564
00:44:06,980 --> 00:44:07,814
"Really?
565
00:44:09,399 --> 00:44:10,400
Okay,
566
00:44:11,527 --> 00:44:15,656
I suppose you better have
at least one real tenor on your side."
567
00:44:22,538 --> 00:44:25,666
And then...
568
00:44:35,634 --> 00:44:39,763
The greatest voice
in the history of the world.
569
00:44:48,605 --> 00:44:51,108
But the miracle in Modena
570
00:44:51,900 --> 00:44:55,945
was the transformation
of Brendan Robert Hewson,
571
00:44:55,946 --> 00:44:57,613
my Irish Catholic father,
572
00:44:57,614 --> 00:44:59,699
not by Luciano Pavarotti,
573
00:44:59,700 --> 00:45:05,496
but by the woman on his arm,
Diana, Princess of Wales.
574
00:45:05,497 --> 00:45:11,377
For those of you who don't know,
Edge's family were Welsh,
575
00:45:11,378 --> 00:45:15,298
so they were thrilled
to meet the Princess of Wales.
576
00:45:15,299 --> 00:45:20,929
Edge dared me to ask the da,
so I did.
577
00:45:22,347 --> 00:45:27,226
Da, you fancy meeting Lady Di?
578
00:45:27,227 --> 00:45:29,395
The Evans are wondering.
579
00:45:29,396 --> 00:45:34,817
"What? Why would I want to meet
a member of the royal family?
580
00:45:34,818 --> 00:45:39,406
I mean, that's like asking me, do I want
to meet the winner of the lotto?"
581
00:45:42,910 --> 00:45:46,330
Got it. I know. Just asking.
582
00:45:47,706 --> 00:45:51,125
The next bit you just couldn't make up.
583
00:45:51,126 --> 00:45:53,878
The da is in our trailer,
584
00:45:53,879 --> 00:45:59,509
not eating from Pavarotti's
deli tray of exotic Italian meats
585
00:45:59,510 --> 00:46:01,720
with names that none of us can pronounce.
586
00:46:03,514 --> 00:46:05,307
And when he turns around...
587
00:46:08,101 --> 00:46:09,728
she's right there.
588
00:46:11,021 --> 00:46:15,650
Approaching 6 feet tall in her heels,
589
00:46:15,651 --> 00:46:18,487
a vision in ivory.
590
00:46:20,030 --> 00:46:25,536
Diana approached the da
as if in slow motion.
591
00:46:26,537 --> 00:46:31,583
"How do you do?"
592
00:46:33,502 --> 00:46:35,503
The da melted.
593
00:46:35,504 --> 00:46:38,673
The shock of a close encounter
with the British royal family
594
00:46:38,674 --> 00:46:41,593
quickly became a teenage crush.
595
00:46:44,805 --> 00:46:48,141
"Very well. Thank you for asking.
596
00:46:49,142 --> 00:46:51,102
Very pleased to meet you."
597
00:46:51,103 --> 00:46:56,233
800 years of oppression,
disappearing in eight seconds.
598
00:46:58,902 --> 00:47:03,322
If you've ever wondered about
the usefulness of the royals--
599
00:47:03,323 --> 00:47:05,534
which a lot of Irish people have--
600
00:47:07,077 --> 00:47:09,662
I would point to this incident.
601
00:47:09,663 --> 00:47:15,252
Eight centuries of oppression,
one princess and we're even. Yes.
602
00:47:20,132 --> 00:47:22,925
When we get home,
603
00:47:22,926 --> 00:47:27,346
the da is still talking
about Princess Diana,
604
00:47:27,347 --> 00:47:30,142
but he's modulating.
605
00:47:31,310 --> 00:47:35,271
"I must say,
she does great things for charity,
606
00:47:35,272 --> 00:47:40,610
but it's not charity
that you're on about, is it?
607
00:47:40,611 --> 00:47:42,612
It's justice, isn't it?
608
00:47:42,613 --> 00:47:47,743
I mean, you wouldn't need charity
if the world was just."
609
00:47:49,578 --> 00:47:54,875
Is the son starting to make sense
to the father?
610
00:47:55,918 --> 00:47:58,002
"I wouldn't go that far,
611
00:47:58,003 --> 00:48:03,216
but I heard
your song 'Pride' on the radio,
612
00:48:03,217 --> 00:48:07,221
and I might have felt some."
613
00:48:08,555 --> 00:48:15,436
Well, you know, it was that song
that got us an invitation to Live Aid.
614
00:48:15,437 --> 00:48:20,776
Bob Geldof said that when he heard it,
he could forgive me the mullet.
615
00:48:22,402 --> 00:48:25,988
When U2 walked on stage at Live Aid,
616
00:48:25,989 --> 00:48:31,661
we found ourselves looking out at a sea
of white flags of surrender,
617
00:48:31,662 --> 00:48:33,914
swelling in the wind, even then,
618
00:48:34,706 --> 00:48:37,292
and a generous spirit
moving through the crowd.
619
00:48:38,293 --> 00:48:44,841
Felt like our punk prayers
were coming of age,
620
00:48:44,842 --> 00:48:45,758
you know?
621
00:48:45,759 --> 00:48:47,469
Prayers of peace.
622
00:48:48,095 --> 00:48:53,308
Because to be hungry
is to be at war with yourself.
623
00:48:54,184 --> 00:48:58,480
To be at war with the very ground
that you walk on.
624
00:48:59,898 --> 00:49:00,899
That's right.
625
00:49:05,112 --> 00:49:09,366
One man comes in the name of love
626
00:49:09,825 --> 00:49:12,744
One man to come and go
627
00:49:14,288 --> 00:49:17,708
One man comes he to justify
628
00:49:18,959 --> 00:49:21,503
One man to overthrow
629
00:49:22,713 --> 00:49:26,425
In the name of love
630
00:49:27,176 --> 00:49:30,846
What more in the name of love
631
00:49:31,763 --> 00:49:35,642
In the name of love
632
00:49:36,185 --> 00:49:39,730
What more in the name of love
633
00:49:41,523 --> 00:49:45,902
One man caught on a barbed-wire fence
634
00:49:45,903 --> 00:49:48,405
One man he resist
635
00:49:50,657 --> 00:49:54,952
One boy washed up on an empty beach
636
00:49:54,953 --> 00:49:58,248
One boy who never will be kissed
637
00:49:58,874 --> 00:50:02,753
In the name of love
638
00:50:03,378 --> 00:50:07,049
What more in the name of love
639
00:50:08,050 --> 00:50:12,011
In the name of love
640
00:50:12,012 --> 00:50:16,682
What more in the name of love
641
00:50:16,683 --> 00:50:17,976
Oh, yeah!
642
00:50:19,102 --> 00:50:21,980
Wembley Stadium, London.
643
00:50:22,981 --> 00:50:27,486
A thought is being broadcast
all over the world.
644
00:50:29,029 --> 00:50:31,240
What if we were the world?
645
00:50:32,115 --> 00:50:34,493
What if we could feed the world?
646
00:50:35,369 --> 00:50:36,537
What else?
647
00:50:37,579 --> 00:50:41,457
What else could be done
in the name of love? What else?
648
00:50:41,458 --> 00:50:45,254
I still ask myself that question,
649
00:50:46,088 --> 00:50:50,551
and I still wanna know the answer.
650
00:50:53,470 --> 00:50:57,640
In the name of love
651
00:50:57,641 --> 00:51:01,520
What more in the name of love
652
00:51:02,354 --> 00:51:06,816
In the name of love
653
00:51:06,817 --> 00:51:10,320
What more in the name of love
654
00:51:11,363 --> 00:51:15,867
In the name of love
655
00:51:15,868 --> 00:51:19,830
What more in the name of love
656
00:51:20,664 --> 00:51:24,917
In the name of love
657
00:51:24,918 --> 00:51:29,882
What more in the name of love
658
00:51:48,817 --> 00:51:54,948
Live Aid and all its spin-offs
raised $250 million.
659
00:51:58,744 --> 00:52:02,038
But African countries
were paying that sum
660
00:52:02,039 --> 00:52:06,250
to you and me every week
661
00:52:06,251 --> 00:52:11,797
for old loans we shoved down
their throats during the Cold War.
662
00:52:11,798 --> 00:52:14,927
"Every fucking week,"
as Bob Geldof would say.
663
00:52:16,261 --> 00:52:18,305
I learned a big lesson from that.
664
00:52:18,931 --> 00:52:23,100
Injustice is often disguised
as bad luck.
665
00:52:23,101 --> 00:52:25,436
As front man with U2,
666
00:52:25,437 --> 00:52:29,106
I realized that if U2
667
00:52:29,107 --> 00:52:33,070
was gonna be writing big songs
about big subjects,
668
00:52:33,654 --> 00:52:35,447
I needed a bigger brain.
669
00:52:36,698 --> 00:52:39,116
A software update.
670
00:52:39,117 --> 00:52:43,454
Rather than go back to school--
You don't have to laugh actually.
671
00:52:43,455 --> 00:52:45,414
It's all good.
672
00:52:45,415 --> 00:52:48,669
I went to Africa with the missus.
673
00:52:50,170 --> 00:52:51,921
Ali and I were working
in this orphanage
674
00:52:51,922 --> 00:52:55,884
in Ajebar, South Wollo, Ethiopia.
675
00:52:57,094 --> 00:53:00,764
It's the autumn of 1985.
676
00:53:01,265 --> 00:53:05,894
These rural people are struggling
to survive without food and water.
677
00:53:06,436 --> 00:53:10,106
Their world has turned in on them.
678
00:53:10,107 --> 00:53:14,069
The very land they live off
has refused them entry.
679
00:53:15,195 --> 00:53:19,866
Tsegaye:
"I am the source, I am the Nile,
680
00:53:19,867 --> 00:53:22,743
I am the African,
I am the beginning!
681
00:53:22,744 --> 00:53:26,539
I am the song,
I am the singing
682
00:53:26,540 --> 00:53:32,044
I am the Ethiopia that 'stretches
her hand in supplication to God'
683
00:53:32,045 --> 00:53:37,300
O Nile, you are the eloquence
that rings the Ethiopian bell
684
00:53:37,301 --> 00:53:39,678
across the deaf world!"
685
00:53:41,096 --> 00:53:45,183
Because buried
in this ground are great riches.
686
00:53:45,184 --> 00:53:49,812
But a great famine has turned
this great nation upside down.
687
00:53:49,813 --> 00:53:55,276
Same country is about to turn
our tiny lives right side up.
688
00:53:55,277 --> 00:54:00,240
We will never be the same again
and we won't want to be.
689
00:54:01,700 --> 00:54:03,410
In this parched place,
690
00:54:03,911 --> 00:54:08,624
we learn lessons from a landscape
and a people that we can never forget.
691
00:54:09,124 --> 00:54:12,126
"Poverty is not natural.
692
00:54:12,127 --> 00:54:19,091
It is man-made and can be overcome
by the actions of women and men."
693
00:54:19,092 --> 00:54:22,887
Most likely women,
who better understand
694
00:54:22,888 --> 00:54:27,518
that where you live
should not decide whether you live.
695
00:54:30,896 --> 00:54:31,897
Are we right?
696
00:54:38,111 --> 00:54:40,113
I wanna run
697
00:54:41,615 --> 00:54:43,951
I want to hide
698
00:54:45,369 --> 00:54:48,913
I want to tear down the walls
699
00:54:48,914 --> 00:54:51,375
That hold me inside
700
00:54:52,543 --> 00:54:54,545
Show me a place
701
00:54:56,213 --> 00:54:58,715
High on the desert plain
702
00:55:00,342 --> 00:55:03,178
Where the streets have no name
703
00:55:07,266 --> 00:55:09,393
I wanted to feel
704
00:55:10,561 --> 00:55:12,980
Sunlight on my face
705
00:55:14,857 --> 00:55:18,359
But I need some shade and shelter
706
00:55:18,360 --> 00:55:20,821
In this waterless place
707
00:55:22,114 --> 00:55:24,491
Each desert rose
708
00:55:25,409 --> 00:55:27,786
Is a prayer for rain
709
00:55:29,872 --> 00:55:32,291
Where the streets have no name
710
00:55:36,128 --> 00:55:38,547
Where the streets have no name
711
00:55:39,882 --> 00:55:42,176
Where the streets have no name
712
00:55:43,635 --> 00:55:48,015
We're still building
And burning down love
713
00:55:48,599 --> 00:55:51,267
We're burning down love
714
00:55:51,268 --> 00:55:54,021
We can get through the fire
715
00:55:54,897 --> 00:55:56,982
If I go with you
716
00:55:58,442 --> 00:56:00,903
There's no other way through
717
00:56:16,502 --> 00:56:20,964
It was hard for Ali and me
to come back from Ethiopia.
718
00:56:21,757 --> 00:56:23,759
A large part of us is still there,
actually.
719
00:56:25,928 --> 00:56:28,346
After The Joshua Tree,
720
00:56:28,347 --> 00:56:32,975
U2 were getting a bit famous.
721
00:56:32,976 --> 00:56:35,394
A bit mainstream.
722
00:56:35,395 --> 00:56:41,360
We were either gonna be
embarrassed about that or not.
723
00:56:42,110 --> 00:56:44,237
Fame is currency,
724
00:56:44,238 --> 00:56:48,242
and we wanted to use what
you gave us to do more
725
00:56:48,951 --> 00:56:51,118
than get a seat at a fancy restaurant.
726
00:56:51,119 --> 00:56:54,373
Which, by the way,
is not to be sniffed at.
727
00:56:55,791 --> 00:56:58,251
I joined some new bands.
728
00:56:58,252 --> 00:57:03,632
Drop the Debt, RED, the ONE Campaign,
fighting extreme poverty.
729
00:57:04,383 --> 00:57:07,552
Really,
the ONE Campaign just had one idea.
730
00:57:07,553 --> 00:57:11,223
You don't have to agree
with someone on everything
731
00:57:12,015 --> 00:57:14,977
if the one thing you do agree on
is important enough.
732
00:57:15,936 --> 00:57:21,233
This led to meetings with people who held
the purse strings for the world's poor.
733
00:57:22,150 --> 00:57:23,527
There are such people.
734
00:57:24,111 --> 00:57:29,616
They're called the government.
They're called the IMF, the World Bank.
735
00:57:31,827 --> 00:57:34,829
This might be a moment
to break the fourth wall...
736
00:57:34,830 --> 00:57:35,746
Really?
737
00:57:35,747 --> 00:57:38,624
...and ask some hard questions
about my motivations.
738
00:57:38,625 --> 00:57:41,962
Okay, there's been a mistake
in the teleprompter. EHP.
739
00:57:42,588 --> 00:57:47,759
Am I trying to cover up my guilt
for having such a lavish lifestyle?
740
00:57:48,260 --> 00:57:49,802
Yes, my lifestyle is lavish.
741
00:57:49,803 --> 00:57:55,726
I am an overpaid, overregarded,
overrewarded, overfed rock-and-roll star.
742
00:57:57,269 --> 00:57:58,937
Am I a hypocrite? Yes.
743
00:58:00,355 --> 00:58:01,857
But not on this front.
744
00:58:02,441 --> 00:58:04,026
On a lot of other fronts.
745
00:58:04,735 --> 00:58:07,445
But I will say,
hypocrites get a bad rap.
746
00:58:07,446 --> 00:58:10,991
I mean, hypocrites do the right thing
at least some of the time.
747
00:58:12,576 --> 00:58:14,161
But in the end...
748
00:58:16,163 --> 00:58:17,246
what does it matter?
749
00:58:17,247 --> 00:58:22,544
I mean, really, who cares?
Motives don't matter.
750
00:58:23,504 --> 00:58:27,590
Outcomes matter.
Lives matter.
751
00:58:27,591 --> 00:58:32,011
Human potential matters.
Justice matters.
752
00:58:32,012 --> 00:58:37,642
You wouldn't need charity
if the world was just, as the da says.
753
00:58:37,643 --> 00:58:42,814
But it's not, so get the check.
Get the check.
754
00:58:44,691 --> 00:58:48,152
Lover, I'm off the streets
755
00:58:48,153 --> 00:58:52,074
Gonna go where the bright lights
Big city meet
756
00:58:52,741 --> 00:58:56,787
With a red guitar, on fire
757
00:58:57,871 --> 00:59:00,999
Desire
758
00:59:01,959 --> 00:59:05,587
She's the candle burning
in my room
759
00:59:06,213 --> 00:59:09,967
I'm like the needle,
needle and spoon
760
00:59:10,634 --> 00:59:14,471
Over the counter, with a shotgun
761
00:59:15,389 --> 00:59:18,851
Pretty soon, everybody got one
762
00:59:19,810 --> 00:59:23,522
In a fever when I'm beside her
763
00:59:24,690 --> 00:59:27,693
Desire
764
00:59:29,403 --> 00:59:32,322
Desire
765
00:59:33,740 --> 00:59:36,034
Burning
766
00:59:38,078 --> 00:59:40,581
Burning, baby
767
00:59:41,206 --> 00:59:43,709
Burning with love
768
00:59:50,716 --> 00:59:54,552
She's the dollars,
she's my protection
769
00:59:54,553 --> 00:59:58,974
She is the promise
In the year of election
770
01:00:00,142 --> 01:00:04,187
Oh, sister, can't let you go
771
01:00:04,188 --> 01:00:07,900
I'm like a preacher stealing hearts
At a traveling show
772
01:00:08,483 --> 01:00:12,945
For love or money, money
Love or money, money
773
01:00:12,946 --> 01:00:17,950
Love or money, money, money,
Money, money, money, money, money
774
01:00:17,951 --> 01:00:21,330
And the fever,
I can't deny her
775
01:00:22,414 --> 01:00:25,250
Desire
776
01:00:26,919 --> 01:00:30,130
Desire
777
01:00:31,340 --> 01:00:35,927
And mark and yen to the pound
To the pound, to the pound
778
01:00:35,928 --> 01:00:39,640
And all that makes the world go round
The world go round
779
01:00:40,349 --> 01:00:42,433
Makes the world go round
780
01:00:42,434 --> 01:00:47,397
Money makes the world go round
781
01:00:48,690 --> 01:00:49,691
Really?
782
01:00:58,116 --> 01:01:02,495
All right,
they're gonna change the cameras,
783
01:01:02,496 --> 01:01:07,584
and I'm gonna have
a very strong drink...
784
01:01:08,460 --> 01:01:10,128
And we'll be right back.
785
01:01:15,634 --> 01:01:16,884
We got four lenses,
786
01:01:16,885 --> 01:01:19,011
- and we're looking for the hero lens.
- Okay.
787
01:01:19,012 --> 01:01:22,306
Right. The most beautiful.
We would like you to stand there.
788
01:01:22,307 --> 01:01:25,185
- I would love to.
- And we'll micro direct you.
789
01:01:27,062 --> 01:01:28,564
Focus on the near eye.
790
01:01:29,857 --> 01:01:32,692
Beautiful. We're never gonna go
tighter than that, are we?
791
01:01:32,693 --> 01:01:33,818
I don't think so.
792
01:01:33,819 --> 01:01:35,111
I think that'd be a bit,
793
01:01:35,112 --> 01:01:37,948
difficult to perform
with those limitations.
794
01:01:39,324 --> 01:01:40,659
Okay, so turn around, buddy.
795
01:01:43,954 --> 01:01:47,291
Yeah. No, that's pretty good. He sort of
naturally knows what to do, right?
796
01:01:49,084 --> 01:01:50,627
It's the third act.
797
01:01:51,628 --> 01:01:53,212
All right, that's good.
798
01:01:53,213 --> 01:01:54,715
The confessional.
799
01:01:59,136 --> 01:02:01,679
All this saving the world,
800
01:02:01,680 --> 01:02:06,101
is it really service,
duty, righteous anger,
801
01:02:06,852 --> 01:02:13,817
or is it just a childlike desire
to be at the center of the action?
802
01:02:15,110 --> 01:02:16,570
The center of attention.
803
01:02:19,865 --> 01:02:21,491
Which begs the question,
804
01:02:22,576 --> 01:02:26,038
can you have a child
and remain a child?
805
01:02:35,214 --> 01:02:37,216
Time to grow up.
806
01:02:39,218 --> 01:02:40,677
Can't fuck this up.
807
01:02:46,683 --> 01:02:49,436
Desire and virtue
808
01:02:51,396 --> 01:02:52,688
is a whole dance,
809
01:02:52,689 --> 01:02:57,527
and no one does it better
than my missus.
810
01:02:57,528 --> 01:02:59,529
"Desire" went to number one
in the charts.
811
01:02:59,530 --> 01:03:03,867
I don't know if there's a connection,
but we were so excited
812
01:03:05,160 --> 01:03:06,912
we had our first baby.
813
01:03:09,498 --> 01:03:10,706
I didn't know how to feel.
814
01:03:10,707 --> 01:03:15,170
I didn't know
if I'd know how to be a father.
815
01:03:17,381 --> 01:03:19,465
Didn't know if I could be a father
816
01:03:19,466 --> 01:03:24,429
because I didn't think
I had been much of a son.
817
01:03:28,016 --> 01:03:31,854
I said in the beginning
that Alison Stewart had faith.
818
01:03:32,646 --> 01:03:38,151
I mean, this woman part wrote
the story that you're listening to.
819
01:03:40,445 --> 01:03:42,697
When Ali and I married,
820
01:03:42,698 --> 01:03:46,827
we moved out of our family homes.
821
01:03:47,494 --> 01:03:49,246
That's how young we were.
822
01:03:50,122 --> 01:03:54,334
We moved into an old stone tower
on the Irish coast,
823
01:03:55,252 --> 01:03:56,253
the lighthouse.
824
01:03:58,589 --> 01:04:02,133
Ali will let her soul be searched,
825
01:04:02,134 --> 01:04:06,679
but only if you arrive
at her fort defenseless,
826
01:04:06,680 --> 01:04:09,141
have you half a chance at challenging
827
01:04:09,892 --> 01:04:13,978
her own almost unbroachable defenses,
828
01:04:13,979 --> 01:04:16,148
it's the only way over that drawbridge.
829
01:04:18,317 --> 01:04:20,526
Wasn't two years into our marriage,
830
01:04:20,527 --> 01:04:26,282
and I could see my wife
in prolonged moments
831
01:04:26,283 --> 01:04:31,580
returning to the vast silence
that she holds inside herself.
832
01:04:33,207 --> 01:04:38,044
She was suggesting that
even when I was home, I wasn't home.
833
01:04:38,045 --> 01:04:42,883
Our weekly walks along the promenade
tinged with melancholy,
834
01:04:44,009 --> 01:04:48,680
as the waves try to make up their mind
whether they're leaving or staying.
835
01:04:49,264 --> 01:04:50,432
Leaving or staying.
836
01:04:51,892 --> 01:04:55,270
See the stone set in your eyes
837
01:04:56,355 --> 01:04:59,274
Am I such a thorn in your side?
838
01:05:00,817 --> 01:05:04,195
Should I wait for you?
839
01:05:04,196 --> 01:05:08,908
There's a selfishness implicit
in the desire to be great at something.
840
01:05:08,909 --> 01:05:12,412
Sleight of hand and
a twist of fate
841
01:05:13,038 --> 01:05:16,958
On a bed of nails
you make me wait
842
01:05:16,959 --> 01:05:20,336
You're trying to prove yourself,
but to who?
843
01:05:20,337 --> 01:05:22,005
Without you
844
01:05:23,841 --> 01:05:26,509
With or without you
845
01:05:26,510 --> 01:05:28,386
Alison Stewart saw to me...
846
01:05:28,387 --> 01:05:30,973
With or without you
847
01:05:31,765 --> 01:05:33,392
...by seeing through me.
848
01:05:35,102 --> 01:05:38,312
Through the storm
we reached the shore
849
01:05:38,313 --> 01:05:39,480
Before I had anything...
850
01:05:39,481 --> 01:05:42,483
You give it all but I want more
851
01:05:42,484 --> 01:05:44,026
...before I had my name...
852
01:05:44,027 --> 01:05:45,486
And I'm greedy
853
01:05:45,487 --> 01:05:46,821
...she knew what I had...
854
01:05:46,822 --> 01:05:48,406
For you
855
01:05:48,407 --> 01:05:49,907
...and hadn't.
856
01:05:49,908 --> 01:05:53,202
With or without you
857
01:05:53,203 --> 01:05:54,287
Concentration.
858
01:05:54,288 --> 01:05:57,290
With or without you
859
01:05:57,291 --> 01:05:59,041
You can't be great at anything...
860
01:05:59,042 --> 01:06:01,294
I can't live
861
01:06:01,295 --> 01:06:03,379
...without an incredible
concentration.
862
01:06:03,380 --> 01:06:05,965
With or without you
863
01:06:05,966 --> 01:06:08,259
But a lot of it's just dysfunction.
864
01:06:08,260 --> 01:06:10,344
You give yourself away
865
01:06:10,345 --> 01:06:12,180
A sort of blindness...
866
01:06:12,181 --> 01:06:14,807
And you give yourself away
867
01:06:14,808 --> 01:06:18,729
...where you might not see
the person right next to you.
868
01:06:19,938 --> 01:06:21,314
You might want an audience...
869
01:06:21,315 --> 01:06:24,400
And you give yourself away
870
01:06:24,401 --> 01:06:26,069
more than you want a family.
871
01:06:26,653 --> 01:06:29,322
My hands are tied
872
01:06:29,323 --> 01:06:31,157
You might not want to give up...
873
01:06:31,158 --> 01:06:34,202
My body bruised, you got me with
874
01:06:34,203 --> 01:06:35,536
...the emptiness...
875
01:06:35,537 --> 01:06:36,787
Nothing to win
876
01:06:36,788 --> 01:06:38,706
...that gave you everything.
877
01:06:38,707 --> 01:06:41,792
And nothing left to lose
878
01:06:41,793 --> 01:06:44,838
With or without you
879
01:06:46,298 --> 01:06:50,092
With or without you
880
01:06:50,093 --> 01:06:54,931
I can't live
881
01:06:54,932 --> 01:06:57,726
With or without you
882
01:07:03,190 --> 01:07:05,316
I called my book Surrender
883
01:07:05,317 --> 01:07:08,737
because I knew this is a word
I needed to understand better,
884
01:07:09,446 --> 01:07:11,072
that it was the antidote
885
01:07:11,073 --> 01:07:14,618
to whatever condition
I was suffering from.
886
01:07:16,203 --> 01:07:18,872
And it didn't come natural to me.
887
01:07:33,971 --> 01:07:37,807
One Sunday in 1999,
888
01:07:37,808 --> 01:07:41,435
I'm back in the Sorrento Lounge
with the da,
889
01:07:41,436 --> 01:07:44,398
and for the first time ever,
890
01:07:45,858 --> 01:07:50,820
decide I'll ambush him
with his own question.
891
01:07:50,821 --> 01:07:52,072
Just throw it at him.
892
01:07:54,074 --> 01:07:57,661
Anything strange or startling, Da?
893
01:08:02,332 --> 01:08:05,043
"I have cancer.
894
01:08:06,837 --> 01:08:11,550
I'm in the departure
lounge as it were.
895
01:08:12,301 --> 01:08:13,718
You won't be putting up
896
01:08:13,719 --> 01:08:18,807
with my unfunny jokes much longer."
897
01:08:26,773 --> 01:08:31,152
Huge boulders fall on your head,
898
01:08:31,153 --> 01:08:34,487
just like that,
from some imaginary mountain.
899
01:08:34,488 --> 01:08:39,786
I thought I was getting to know him
that there'd be more time.
900
01:08:41,913 --> 01:08:43,624
How Bob Hewson of you.
901
01:08:44,207 --> 01:08:46,209
Just when I thought I was
finally getting to know you,
902
01:08:46,210 --> 01:08:50,923
that you might give up some answers,
you give me the slip.
903
01:08:53,383 --> 01:08:55,385
Beaumont Hospital...
904
01:08:57,470 --> 01:08:59,472
Dublin, the summer of 2001.
905
01:08:59,473 --> 01:09:04,143
I see my father in a hospital bed.
906
01:09:04,144 --> 01:09:07,397
This time it's him
who's running out of air.
907
01:09:07,898 --> 01:09:13,278
And I see myself lying next to him
908
01:09:13,904 --> 01:09:15,988
on a mattress on the floor.
909
01:09:16,490 --> 01:09:18,033
He's breathing,
910
01:09:19,660 --> 01:09:21,912
but his breathing's
getting shallower,
911
01:09:23,037 --> 01:09:24,580
like the grave in his chest.
912
01:09:24,581 --> 01:09:26,542
He shouts my name,
913
01:09:27,376 --> 01:09:32,338
confusing me with my brother
and the other way around.
914
01:09:32,339 --> 01:09:35,174
"Paul, Norman. Paul, Norman. Paul."
915
01:09:35,175 --> 01:09:39,263
I jump up, call the nurse.
916
01:09:40,639 --> 01:09:41,974
"Are you okay, Bob?"
917
01:09:42,850 --> 01:09:44,058
she whispers in his ear.
918
01:09:44,059 --> 01:09:48,271
His tenor has now become short,
tinny breaths.
919
01:09:48,272 --> 01:09:53,527
An S after every exhalation.
"Yes. Get me out of here.
920
01:09:54,027 --> 01:09:56,654
Get me out of here.
I wanna go home. Yes.
921
01:09:56,655 --> 01:09:58,698
Yes, I wanna go home. Yes."
922
01:09:58,699 --> 01:10:05,038
I said, "It's okay.
It's okay. It's okay.
923
01:10:08,959 --> 01:10:10,252
Are you okay?"
924
01:10:11,461 --> 01:10:12,671
Listen.
925
01:10:16,383 --> 01:10:17,593
Silence.
926
01:10:18,510 --> 01:10:24,474
I put my ear close to his mouth.
927
01:10:26,518 --> 01:10:27,728
Silence.
928
01:10:31,190 --> 01:10:34,735
Silence followed by,
929
01:10:35,944 --> 01:10:38,155
"Fuck off."
930
01:10:47,706 --> 01:10:54,337
There's something perfectly imperfect
about my da's exit from my life.
931
01:10:54,338 --> 01:10:56,381
I don't believe he was telling me
932
01:10:57,007 --> 01:11:01,595
or the very vigilant
night nurse to fuck off,
933
01:11:02,429 --> 01:11:03,847
though I'm not ruling that out.
934
01:11:05,724 --> 01:11:06,891
I'd like to think
935
01:11:06,892 --> 01:11:11,729
he was addressing the burdens that
had been on his back for most of his life.
936
01:11:11,730 --> 01:11:13,398
I have a feeling...
937
01:11:16,985 --> 01:11:18,570
they're my inheritance,
938
01:11:19,738 --> 01:11:23,367
but I believe
I have a choice in the matter.
939
01:11:26,828 --> 01:11:29,080
And there was kindness too.
940
01:11:29,081 --> 01:11:32,918
I think he believed that to dream
941
01:11:33,418 --> 01:11:35,921
was to be disappointed,
942
01:11:37,047 --> 01:11:38,924
and he didn't want that for me.
943
01:11:41,635 --> 01:11:44,095
This is a-- This is--
944
01:11:44,096 --> 01:11:47,557
This is when you realize
your father is your friend.
945
01:11:47,558 --> 01:11:52,104
And you know, the journey of--
946
01:11:52,771 --> 01:11:57,692
you know, from father to friend
is the only one to be on really,
947
01:11:57,693 --> 01:11:59,736
if you're a father, and I am.
948
01:12:01,113 --> 01:12:04,366
And I sort of made friends
with my father
949
01:12:04,867 --> 01:12:07,703
after he passed,
which is a bit of a mistake.
950
01:12:09,788 --> 01:12:15,751
To imagine the story from his
perspective is humbling, you know.
951
01:12:15,752 --> 01:12:17,171
He loses his wife.
952
01:12:17,754 --> 01:12:20,298
He's left with his two kids,
953
01:12:20,299 --> 01:12:24,844
and one of them
is charging in his direction,
954
01:12:24,845 --> 01:12:27,555
you know, coming for him guns blazing.
955
01:12:27,556 --> 01:12:29,473
And one of them is gonna take him out
956
01:12:29,474 --> 01:12:32,768
by achieving all the ambitions
he was afraid to have.
957
01:12:32,769 --> 01:12:37,690
He told me in those final days,
when accepting his cancers,
958
01:12:37,691 --> 01:12:39,193
that he'd lost his faith.
959
01:12:39,693 --> 01:12:42,528
And he also told me
that I should never lose mine.
960
01:12:42,529 --> 01:12:45,824
That it was the most
interesting thing about me.
961
01:12:47,701 --> 01:12:51,162
But it did happen,
where I reached out...
962
01:12:51,163 --> 01:12:52,914
Yeshua.
963
01:12:52,915 --> 01:12:57,210
...and that thing that I have
964
01:12:57,211 --> 01:13:00,338
- held so tightly...
- Yeshua.
965
01:13:00,339 --> 01:13:04,551
...wasn't there. It was the most
terrifying moment of my life.
966
01:13:06,553 --> 01:13:08,138
Yeshua.
967
01:13:14,311 --> 01:13:17,105
Hold me close
968
01:13:19,733 --> 01:13:22,611
Hold me close and don't let
969
01:13:26,198 --> 01:13:30,953
Hold me close
and don't let me go
970
01:13:31,995 --> 01:13:34,873
Hold me close
971
01:13:36,625 --> 01:13:41,171
Like I'm someone
that you might know
972
01:14:12,119 --> 01:14:13,537
The heart is a bloom
973
01:14:16,290 --> 01:14:18,375
Shoots up through
the stony ground
974
01:14:19,751 --> 01:14:21,044
There's no room
975
01:14:23,213 --> 01:14:25,340
No space to rent in this town
976
01:14:26,633 --> 01:14:27,926
You're out of luck
977
01:14:30,929 --> 01:14:32,931
The reason that you had to care
978
01:14:33,640 --> 01:14:35,142
Traffic is stuck
979
01:14:37,352 --> 01:14:39,021
You're not moving anywhere
980
01:14:41,231 --> 01:14:44,109
You thought you'd found a friend
981
01:14:45,444 --> 01:14:48,030
To take you out of this place
982
01:14:48,655 --> 01:14:52,783
Someone you could lend a hand
983
01:14:52,784 --> 01:14:55,620
In return for grace
984
01:14:55,621 --> 01:14:57,789
It's a beautiful day
985
01:15:00,792 --> 01:15:04,838
The sky falls
You feel like it's a beautiful day
986
01:15:07,674 --> 01:15:09,718
Don't let it get away
987
01:15:10,511 --> 01:15:12,012
You're on the road
988
01:15:14,556 --> 01:15:17,642
But you got no destination
989
01:15:17,643 --> 01:15:20,395
You're in the mud
990
01:15:21,730 --> 01:15:24,857
In the maze of her imagination
991
01:15:24,858 --> 01:15:26,944
You love this town
992
01:15:29,488 --> 01:15:32,741
Even if that doesn't ring true
993
01:15:33,325 --> 01:15:35,661
You've been all over
994
01:15:36,495 --> 01:15:38,955
And it's been all over you
995
01:15:38,956 --> 01:15:43,585
It's a beautiful day
996
01:15:44,169 --> 01:15:46,712
Don't let it get away
997
01:15:46,713 --> 01:15:50,717
Beautiful day
998
01:15:51,426 --> 01:15:54,054
Yeah, yeah
999
01:15:55,138 --> 01:15:57,516
Touch me now
1000
01:15:58,600 --> 01:16:01,186
Take me to that other place
1001
01:16:02,604 --> 01:16:05,315
Teach me, love
1002
01:16:06,024 --> 01:16:08,735
I know I'm not a hopeless case
1003
01:16:16,785 --> 01:16:19,997
The dead are always with us
Won't leave us alone
1004
01:16:20,664 --> 01:16:24,333
Blowing through our memories
Rattling their bones
1005
01:16:24,334 --> 01:16:27,546
The dead are always with us
There's more of them than us
1006
01:16:28,088 --> 01:16:31,091
The valley of dry bones,
dust to dust
1007
01:16:31,842 --> 01:16:34,677
Parched and abandoned
Filled with doubt
1008
01:16:34,678 --> 01:16:38,932
But after the flood
All the colors came out
1009
01:16:44,813 --> 01:16:51,278
All the colors came out
1010
01:16:51,987 --> 01:16:54,489
It was a beautiful day
1011
01:16:56,867 --> 01:16:59,328
Don't let it get away
1012
01:16:59,828 --> 01:17:02,915
Beautiful day
1013
01:17:04,124 --> 01:17:06,960
Yeah, yeah
1014
01:17:07,961 --> 01:17:10,964
Touch me now
1015
01:17:11,465 --> 01:17:13,884
Take me to that other place
1016
01:17:15,135 --> 01:17:18,304
Reach me
1017
01:17:18,305 --> 01:17:21,225
I know I'm not a hopeless case
1018
01:17:22,017 --> 01:17:25,562
What you don't have
You don't need it now
1019
01:17:26,355 --> 01:17:31,025
What you don't know
You can feel it somehow
1020
01:17:31,026 --> 01:17:36,280
What you don't have
You don't need it now
1021
01:17:36,281 --> 01:17:42,162
Don't need it now
1022
01:17:50,420 --> 01:17:55,466
I have a very unscientific theory
1023
01:17:55,467 --> 01:18:02,474
that when you lose someone you love,
they bequeath you something.
1024
01:18:03,934 --> 01:18:04,977
A gift.
1025
01:18:13,485 --> 01:18:15,279
When I lost my mother...
1026
01:18:19,032 --> 01:18:20,117
well...
1027
01:18:22,119 --> 01:18:27,541
I got you to fill that hole.
1028
01:18:28,041 --> 01:18:33,296
When I lost my father,
I found my voice started to change,
1029
01:18:33,297 --> 01:18:36,591
and I couldn't help thinking
1030
01:18:36,592 --> 01:18:39,970
that the baritone
who thought he was a tenor
1031
01:18:41,388 --> 01:18:42,889
actually became one.
1032
01:18:42,890 --> 01:18:44,474
I don't know how.
1033
01:18:44,975 --> 01:18:47,311
All kinds of reasons.
1034
01:18:48,061 --> 01:18:52,566
Might have something to do
with this word forgiveness.
1035
01:18:53,483 --> 01:18:58,405
I don't know if I forgave my father,
or my father forgave me.
1036
01:19:01,742 --> 01:19:06,705
'Cause I was born with my fists up.
1037
01:19:07,289 --> 01:19:10,583
Surrender does not come easy to me.
1038
01:19:10,584 --> 01:19:16,507
To bow down to my bandmates,
to my wife, to my Maker,
1039
01:19:17,132 --> 01:19:20,968
is a struggle.
1040
01:19:20,969 --> 01:19:26,766
I have faith enough to hope
and hope enough to love.
1041
01:19:26,767 --> 01:19:30,771
And this music is how I practice that.
1042
01:19:31,313 --> 01:19:34,983
And my father on Earth,
he gave me that.
1043
01:19:36,109 --> 01:19:41,323
And he left me with one
of his favorite melodies to haunt me.
1044
01:19:42,324 --> 01:19:43,991
Only realized recently,
1045
01:19:43,992 --> 01:19:49,580
the title has the same name
as our local watering hole,
1046
01:19:49,581 --> 01:19:51,834
the Sorrento Lounge.
1047
01:19:54,044 --> 01:19:55,337
"Come Back to Sorrento."
1048
01:19:56,922 --> 01:19:58,715
And it was this melody.
1049
01:20:02,261 --> 01:20:05,597
And I will.
1050
01:22:02,256 --> 01:22:05,259
One, two, three, four.
1051
01:22:11,181 --> 01:22:15,227
Baby's crying 'cause it's born to sing
1052
01:22:16,770 --> 01:22:20,899
Singers cry about everything
1053
01:22:22,401 --> 01:22:26,863
Still in the playground
Falling off the swing
1054
01:22:26,864 --> 01:22:30,868
But you know that I know
1055
01:22:33,495 --> 01:22:35,455
I just can't
remember the next bit.
1056
01:22:35,956 --> 01:22:37,708
What's the next bit of the melody?
1057
01:22:39,376 --> 01:22:41,419
Keep going. That's great.
1058
01:22:41,420 --> 01:22:43,629
One, two, three.
1059
01:22:43,630 --> 01:22:48,593
It is what it is
It's not what it seems
1060
01:22:48,594 --> 01:22:54,015
This screwed-up stuff
Is the stuff of dreams
1061
01:22:54,016 --> 01:22:59,478
I got just enough low
self-esteem
1062
01:22:59,479 --> 01:23:03,901
To get me where I want to go
1063
01:23:04,860 --> 01:23:06,277
Another verse.
1064
01:23:06,278 --> 01:23:10,908
The showman gives you
Front row to his heart
1065
01:23:11,783 --> 01:23:16,205
The showman prays
His heartache will chart
1066
01:23:17,289 --> 01:23:21,209
Making a spectacle of falling apart
1067
01:23:21,210 --> 01:23:25,506
Is just the start of the show
1068
01:23:26,965 --> 01:23:31,303
Oh, you don't care
1069
01:23:32,012 --> 01:23:36,934
But you know I'm there
1070
01:23:37,476 --> 01:23:40,436
You think you look so good
1071
01:23:40,437 --> 01:23:43,523
A little more better
1072
01:23:43,524 --> 01:23:46,234
Look so good
1073
01:23:46,235 --> 01:23:48,694
A little more, little more
1074
01:23:48,695 --> 01:23:51,489
You think you look so good
1075
01:23:51,490 --> 01:23:54,408
That's what's gonna get you
1076
01:23:54,409 --> 01:23:57,870
Look so good
1077
01:23:57,871 --> 01:23:59,206
A to G.
1078
01:24:00,999 --> 01:24:05,003
I'll be chasing the sunlight
1079
01:24:05,838 --> 01:24:10,008
That's why I'm staying up all night
1080
01:24:10,509 --> 01:24:15,472
I lie for a living,
I love to let on
1081
01:24:16,139 --> 01:24:22,980
But you make it true
When you sing along
1082
01:24:24,648 --> 01:24:27,650
You think you look so good
1083
01:24:27,651 --> 01:24:30,695
A little more better
1084
01:24:30,696 --> 01:24:33,030
Look so good
1085
01:24:33,031 --> 01:24:35,700
A little more, little more
1086
01:24:35,701 --> 01:24:38,452
You think you look so good
1087
01:24:38,453 --> 01:24:41,664
That's what's gonna get you
1088
01:24:41,665 --> 01:24:44,709
Look so good
1089
01:24:44,710 --> 01:24:46,587
Keeps-- Keep chorus going.
1090
01:24:47,504 --> 01:24:49,714
Look so good
1091
01:24:49,715 --> 01:24:52,133
A little more better
1092
01:24:52,134 --> 01:24:54,969
You think you look so good
1093
01:24:54,970 --> 01:24:57,346
A little more, little more
1094
01:24:57,347 --> 01:25:00,433
You think you look so good
1095
01:25:00,434 --> 01:25:03,394
That's what's gonna get you
1096
01:25:03,395 --> 01:25:05,855
Look so good
1097
01:25:05,856 --> 01:25:08,566
A little more, little more
1098
01:25:08,567 --> 01:25:11,777
You think you look so good
1099
01:25:11,778 --> 01:25:14,447
A little more, little more
1100
01:25:14,448 --> 01:25:16,782
Look so good
1101
01:25:16,783 --> 01:25:20,287
A little more, little more
1102
01:25:45,646 --> 01:25:47,230
- Happy?
- Back to work.
1103
01:25:47,231 --> 01:25:48,315
Okay.
1104
01:25:48,899 --> 01:25:50,776
- That was great.
- I loved it.
85829
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