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1
00:00:02,956 --> 00:00:04,807
Boom.
When ya have it, boys.
2
00:00:04,906 --> 00:00:06,541
Man,
he beat every one of us.
3
00:00:06,627 --> 00:00:08,674
Actually, not everyone.
4
00:00:08,881 --> 00:00:11,201
Oh, yeah? What's... What's...
What's that supposed to mean?
5
00:00:11,283 --> 00:00:12,799
You haven't played me.
6
00:00:13,007 --> 00:00:16,476
Ah, oh, it wouldn't be fair.
I'm from the homeland.
7
00:00:16,752 --> 00:00:20,948
Competitive darts
is, uh, oozing out of my pores.
8
00:00:21,194 --> 00:00:22,455
Really? Um...
9
00:00:22,651 --> 00:00:25,033
there's not a sport on
this planet you can beat me at.
10
00:00:25,104 --> 00:00:26,487
All right?
And I'll tell you what.
11
00:00:26,582 --> 00:00:28,369
How about 20 bucks,
right now,
12
00:00:28,514 --> 00:00:30,627
we play high score,
three darts?
13
00:00:30,695 --> 00:00:32,448
- Come on.
- Mr. Gable,
14
00:00:32,953 --> 00:00:34,885
you can have
your three darts.
15
00:00:35,588 --> 00:00:36,940
I only need one.
16
00:00:37,071 --> 00:00:38,505
Whoa!
17
00:00:38,759 --> 00:00:40,907
It just got real. Dude,
he just called you out.
18
00:00:41,019 --> 00:00:43,860
Ah, now, now,
now, gentlemen,
19
00:00:43,957 --> 00:00:45,571
it's just
a friendly challenge.
20
00:00:46,133 --> 00:00:47,407
I'll go first.
21
00:00:50,071 --> 00:00:51,751
Side-arm.
22
00:00:53,858 --> 00:00:56,305
- Whoa!
- Oh-ho!
23
00:00:56,440 --> 00:00:58,743
Oh! ho, ho ho!
24
00:00:59,909 --> 00:01:04,977
I believe that's what you fellas
would call a "microphone drop."
25
00:01:05,227 --> 00:01:06,455
All right, all right,
fine, whatever.
26
00:01:06,522 --> 00:01:08,019
You got a bull's-eye,
all right?
27
00:01:08,087 --> 00:01:10,894
50 points. I can beat that easy.
I get three darts.
28
00:01:10,962 --> 00:01:12,308
Oh,
I anxiously await that.
29
00:01:12,376 --> 00:01:13,755
- Come on, guy. Come on.
- Do it, Kev.
30
00:01:13,822 --> 00:01:15,332
Come on.
I got this, man.
31
00:01:19,229 --> 00:01:21,534
All right, 'cause you idiots
are in my peripheral vision.
32
00:01:21,602 --> 00:01:22,609
- You got to step back.
- All right.
33
00:01:22,676 --> 00:01:23,882
Does that even count,
by the way?
34
00:01:23,949 --> 00:01:25,130
It shouldn't even count.
We moved. Good luck. Come on.
35
00:01:25,197 --> 00:01:27,230
- All right.
- You just need a, what?
36
00:01:27,298 --> 00:01:28,599
A triple 20
and you win.
37
00:01:28,667 --> 00:01:29,976
All right, stop, okay?
Here we go.
38
00:01:30,043 --> 00:01:31,738
There we go. Ugh.
39
00:01:31,847 --> 00:01:33,152
Kid got in his head.
Yep.
40
00:01:33,220 --> 00:01:34,566
Well, t-that's 3. You just need
41
00:01:34,633 --> 00:01:36,900
- 47 more with one dart.
- I-I know what I got to do,
42
00:01:36,968 --> 00:01:38,333
- All right, come on. Come on.
- okay? I'm doing it!
43
00:01:38,400 --> 00:01:41,525
- Try it side-arm.
- I'm doin' it side-arm! American-style!
44
00:01:43,694 --> 00:01:48,340
♪ I am not your ordinary guy ♪
*KEVIN CAN WAIT*
Season 02 Episode 18
"The Whole Enchilada"
45
00:01:49,759 --> 00:01:52,402
Dingdong.
Wendy's here.
46
00:01:52,676 --> 00:01:54,597
Hey, how you doin'?
47
00:01:54,665 --> 00:01:55,761
Good.
48
00:01:55,829 --> 00:01:58,304
Always good when I'm cooking.
How are you?
49
00:01:58,372 --> 00:02:00,621
Always good when I'm eating.
50
00:02:01,580 --> 00:02:03,010
Means that we're both good.
What?
51
00:02:03,562 --> 00:02:04,708
What are we lookin' at?
52
00:02:04,776 --> 00:02:06,652
Well,
I'll give you a hint.
53
00:02:06,980 --> 00:02:09,261
It rhymes with...
54
00:02:10,388 --> 00:02:11,683
enchiladas.
55
00:02:11,751 --> 00:02:12,907
- It's enchiladas. I'm really
- Okay.
56
00:02:12,974 --> 00:02:14,686
- Bad at that.
- Yeah, no, that's all right. No prob...
57
00:02:14,753 --> 00:02:17,050
Hey, if they're as good
as the ones I had two weeks ago,
58
00:02:17,160 --> 00:02:18,816
I am gonna be
very, very happy.
59
00:02:18,884 --> 00:02:20,119
They're better.
60
00:02:20,263 --> 00:02:23,660
Last time
I used a ground chuck.
61
00:02:23,729 --> 00:02:25,089
This time...
62
00:02:25,726 --> 00:02:28,295
- Kobe beef.
- Wow.
63
00:02:28,363 --> 00:02:30,605
I am gonna start calling
you State Farm,
64
00:02:30,673 --> 00:02:32,871
'cause you are
a good neighbor.
65
00:02:35,168 --> 00:02:36,594
Let me get in here
and try this.
66
00:02:36,634 --> 00:02:39,437
- All right. Ooh. It's still warm.
- Ooh.
67
00:02:39,547 --> 00:02:40,814
So good.
68
00:02:43,104 --> 00:02:44,855
Mmm.
69
00:02:48,793 --> 00:02:50,728
Oh, my God.
Oh, man.
70
00:02:50,936 --> 00:02:53,785
That's literally the best thing
I've ever had!
71
00:02:54,266 --> 00:02:56,769
Great.
Well, you keep enjoying it.
72
00:02:56,889 --> 00:02:57,956
Oh!
73
00:02:58,410 --> 00:02:59,652
Question.
74
00:02:59,910 --> 00:03:01,566
What are we?
75
00:03:02,042 --> 00:03:03,066
Oh, I know this one.
76
00:03:03,134 --> 00:03:06,037
I just saw this on
the, uh, Discovery Channel.
77
00:03:06,550 --> 00:03:09,558
We are like,
it's like 98% water.
78
00:03:09,626 --> 00:03:11,449
Right?
I mean, it seems crazy.
79
00:03:11,517 --> 00:03:13,120
Doesn't... Doesn't seem
to make sense, right?
80
00:03:13,187 --> 00:03:14,611
'Cause we... we'd be like
all over the place
81
00:03:14,679 --> 00:03:15,736
and feel like,
"Hey"
82
00:03:15,804 --> 00:03:19,394
No, I mean what are we?
83
00:03:20,149 --> 00:03:21,855
- Oh.
- Right.
84
00:03:22,837 --> 00:03:25,793
- Well, we're neighbors. We're...
- Mm-hmm.
85
00:03:25,861 --> 00:03:26,953
- Friends.
- Yeah.
86
00:03:27,028 --> 00:03:28,663
Wen-Wendy, we had this talk.
87
00:03:28,731 --> 00:03:32,847
I mean, you love making the food
and I-I love eating it.
88
00:03:32,915 --> 00:03:34,382
- I-I-I don't know.
- Um...
89
00:03:34,607 --> 00:03:35,628
We're happy.
90
00:03:35,969 --> 00:03:37,628
I was happy,
91
00:03:38,019 --> 00:03:39,639
but now I want more.
92
00:03:39,980 --> 00:03:41,660
You want the whole enchilada?
93
00:03:42,144 --> 00:03:43,355
I'm serious.
94
00:03:43,423 --> 00:03:44,524
Oh, no, no, no, no.
95
00:03:46,416 --> 00:03:49,587
We're always saying we're gonna
do stuff, like see a movie.
96
00:03:49,658 --> 00:03:52,313
But you always seem
to have plans.
97
00:03:52,486 --> 00:03:53,915
That is not true.
Come on.
98
00:03:53,983 --> 00:03:56,423
Okay, fine. Then let's
see a movie Friday night.
99
00:03:56,499 --> 00:03:57,588
This Friday,
I do have plans.
100
00:03:57,655 --> 00:03:59,071
- Ugh.
- I... N-No, seriously.
101
00:03:59,139 --> 00:04:01,290
It's a, uh...
It's a work thing.
102
00:04:01,358 --> 00:04:04,693
Uh, we have a dinner
for a small company awards.
103
00:04:04,761 --> 00:04:05,915
You know,
it's a local thing.
104
00:04:05,983 --> 00:04:08,485
Okay.
Then I can't do this.
105
00:04:08,694 --> 00:04:10,280
You mean, you, uh...
You can't do this?
106
00:04:10,348 --> 00:04:11,549
I mean everything.
107
00:04:11,718 --> 00:04:14,020
If you can't make time
for me,
108
00:04:14,181 --> 00:04:16,671
then I can't make time
for your food.
109
00:04:18,688 --> 00:04:20,741
I-I can make the time.
110
00:04:22,979 --> 00:04:24,980
Great. When?
111
00:04:25,787 --> 00:04:28,843
Uh...
I'm pretty busy now,
112
00:04:28,911 --> 00:04:31,194
but April...
My April opens right up.
113
00:04:31,364 --> 00:04:32,483
Today.
114
00:04:32,825 --> 00:04:35,161
A matinee movie,
you and me.
115
00:04:37,931 --> 00:04:39,280
Okay, yeah, yeah.
Okay.
116
00:04:39,374 --> 00:04:40,468
Yay!
117
00:04:40,536 --> 00:04:41,853
- Yeah. Yeah.
- Okay.
118
00:04:41,921 --> 00:04:43,819
- I'm gonna go get changed right now.
- Okay.
119
00:04:43,887 --> 00:04:45,687
This is gonna be
so much fun!
120
00:04:45,755 --> 00:04:47,390
Hey, Kendra!
121
00:04:52,482 --> 00:04:55,084
Did you just, uh,
make a date with Wendy?
122
00:04:55,277 --> 00:04:56,258
Yeah.
123
00:04:56,326 --> 00:04:58,493
Come on, Dad.
You are unbelievable.
124
00:04:58,561 --> 00:04:59,594
We've been through this.
125
00:04:59,662 --> 00:05:02,110
Can't you see she's
controlling you with food?
126
00:05:02,277 --> 00:05:04,345
Oh.
Listen, I get it.
127
00:05:04,428 --> 00:05:06,675
You... You don't want me
to date.
128
00:05:06,751 --> 00:05:09,542
What? No. No, no, no, no.
I want you to date.
129
00:05:09,610 --> 00:05:11,393
Just not her.
130
00:05:11,461 --> 00:05:13,710
Look, it's just a movie,
all right?
131
00:05:13,778 --> 00:05:14,914
It's not a big deal.
132
00:05:15,109 --> 00:05:16,901
And, by the way, have...
Have you tried this?
133
00:05:16,969 --> 00:05:18,054
Give that a shot.
134
00:05:18,190 --> 00:05:20,190
You will understand
what I'm saying.
135
00:05:22,019 --> 00:05:23,523
- Holy crap.
- Yep.
136
00:05:23,591 --> 00:05:25,431
That is literally
the best thing I've ever had.
137
00:05:25,539 --> 00:05:26,843
I literally...
I just said that.
138
00:05:26,911 --> 00:05:28,883
I just, literally,
just said that.
139
00:05:30,265 --> 00:05:31,719
Dude, what are you
still doing here?
140
00:05:31,787 --> 00:05:33,914
- Go get your movie pants on.
- All right, I'm going.
141
00:05:37,646 --> 00:05:40,116
How great is this?
142
00:05:40,184 --> 00:05:41,451
Yeah, it's good.
It's good.
143
00:05:41,519 --> 00:05:42,746
Mm.
144
00:05:43,508 --> 00:05:46,059
Now, who's... who's the lady
in the sunglasses?
145
00:05:46,127 --> 00:05:47,167
You know, it's...
I don't know.
146
00:05:47,234 --> 00:05:48,513
Really, it's kind of
hard to concentrate.
147
00:05:48,580 --> 00:05:49,615
My neck's sweating.
148
00:05:49,683 --> 00:05:51,364
Because it looks like
the girl from the beginning,
149
00:05:51,431 --> 00:05:53,005
but that girl
wasn't wearing sunglasses.
150
00:05:53,073 --> 00:05:55,230
- I'm con... fused.
- Shh. Well, why don't we just...
151
00:05:55,298 --> 00:05:57,285
watch it and just see
how things shake out, okay?
152
00:05:57,353 --> 00:05:59,588
- Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's do that.
- Okay.
153
00:06:00,885 --> 00:06:05,313
I never noticed it before,
but your ears are adorable.
154
00:06:05,428 --> 00:06:07,814
They look like a cute
little question mark.
155
00:06:07,882 --> 00:06:08,955
- They just need a dot
- Shh.
156
00:06:09,022 --> 00:06:10,322
On the bottom.
Boop. Okay.
157
00:06:10,390 --> 00:06:11,522
Okay.
158
00:06:13,053 --> 00:06:14,374
Okay. Okay.
159
00:06:14,442 --> 00:06:16,577
Ooh. Ooh, I think
we're about to find out the...
160
00:06:16,718 --> 00:06:18,052
Who the killer
might be here.
161
00:06:18,143 --> 00:06:20,022
Don't worry.
It's not him.
162
00:06:20,109 --> 00:06:22,412
It's the brother.
I read it online.
163
00:06:27,976 --> 00:06:29,211
You went to the movies
with her?
164
00:06:29,278 --> 00:06:30,749
Yes, it was a mess.
165
00:06:30,817 --> 00:06:32,359
First of all, she wouldn't
shut up the whole time,
166
00:06:32,426 --> 00:06:36,069
she was very clingy, and she had
bad grandma perfume on.
167
00:06:36,137 --> 00:06:38,335
- Oh, no.
- It was the worst date ever.
168
00:06:38,419 --> 00:06:39,926
But this is incredible.
169
00:06:39,994 --> 00:06:41,662
- Oh, my God. Kevin.
- Hey, guys.
170
00:06:41,730 --> 00:06:43,866
Just a heads up,
I got us some more toilet paper.
171
00:06:43,934 --> 00:06:45,186
So, uh,
we're good to go.
172
00:06:45,397 --> 00:06:48,228
W-We got
like 500 rolls back there.
173
00:06:48,678 --> 00:06:49,944
I'm sorry.
174
00:06:50,022 --> 00:06:51,991
I grew up very poor,
and oftentimes,
175
00:06:52,059 --> 00:06:53,585
we couldn't afford
toilet paper.
176
00:06:53,739 --> 00:06:55,413
So I guess
it's the child in me
177
00:06:55,481 --> 00:06:58,186
feeling secure
knowing we have it.
178
00:06:58,540 --> 00:07:01,757
Oh, Rootger,
that's heartbreaking.
179
00:07:01,825 --> 00:07:04,147
- Thank you for understanding.
- Of course.
180
00:07:04,320 --> 00:07:06,811
Actually,
that's a complete lie.
181
00:07:07,179 --> 00:07:08,746
I love Amazon Prime.
182
00:07:08,814 --> 00:07:11,467
I mean, you click a button,
it's there in an hour.
183
00:07:11,535 --> 00:07:12,536
I... I can't stop.
184
00:07:12,604 --> 00:07:14,374
Send it back, okay?
185
00:07:14,442 --> 00:07:16,257
If I only knew how.
186
00:07:16,325 --> 00:07:18,639
All right,
so, back to Wendy.
187
00:07:18,707 --> 00:07:20,409
You are gonna
march over there
188
00:07:20,519 --> 00:07:22,530
and you are gonna
end this thing today.
189
00:07:22,598 --> 00:07:24,484
- I don't think I can do that.
- And why is that?
190
00:07:24,551 --> 00:07:26,452
- Okay, do me a favor. Try that.
- Okay.
191
00:07:26,582 --> 00:07:28,553
- Try it.
- It's... Forget it. Okay.
192
00:07:31,063 --> 00:07:32,725
Oh, my...
193
00:07:33,892 --> 00:07:34,960
We have a problem.
194
00:07:35,028 --> 00:07:36,491
Yep.
195
00:07:36,874 --> 00:07:39,616
- Right? I'm stuck.
- No, you are not stuck.
196
00:07:39,686 --> 00:07:41,171
No. No.
197
00:07:41,239 --> 00:07:43,546
Yesterday,
it was a movie.
198
00:07:43,614 --> 00:07:46,018
Tomorrow, it's gonna be,
"How did she get you down the aisle?"
199
00:07:46,085 --> 00:07:47,553
We are ending this today.
200
00:07:47,621 --> 00:07:49,835
A true nightmare that would be,
right?
201
00:07:49,948 --> 00:07:51,783
Though, can you imagine the food
at the reception?
202
00:07:51,850 --> 00:07:54,012
- It would be ridiculous!
- Okay.
203
00:07:54,080 --> 00:07:55,888
- It'd be the best food ever.
- No, stop. Stop.
204
00:07:55,955 --> 00:07:57,563
We're focusing. We're gonna
end this right now.
205
00:07:57,630 --> 00:07:59,349
Actually, we're gonna do it
right now. Let's go. Let's go.
206
00:07:59,416 --> 00:08:00,584
- Oh, come on.
- Nope. Let's go.
207
00:08:00,651 --> 00:08:02,321
- Will you...
- Grab the enchiladas, though.
208
00:08:02,345 --> 00:08:03,782
Grab 'em. Yep.
209
00:08:06,339 --> 00:08:08,059
Well,
this is a nice surprise.
210
00:08:08,127 --> 00:08:10,597
I didn't think I was gonna be
getting a visitor today.
211
00:08:10,665 --> 00:08:14,068
Yeah, um, Wendy, I just
think we probably need to talk.
212
00:08:14,381 --> 00:08:15,832
Yeah, okay.
213
00:08:15,900 --> 00:08:17,624
You want me to whip something up
for lunch?
214
00:08:17,692 --> 00:08:19,325
Uh, no.
I'm not here for that.
215
00:08:19,393 --> 00:08:22,153
Why?
W-What're you thinking?
216
00:08:22,531 --> 00:08:24,388
Okay.
I was just gonna start making
217
00:08:24,456 --> 00:08:27,418
those, uh,
Swedish meatballs you wanted.
218
00:08:27,621 --> 00:08:28,841
The ones we've been talking
about for the last month?
219
00:08:28,908 --> 00:08:31,832
Yeah, all the spices
just arrived from Sweden,
220
00:08:31,900 --> 00:08:33,262
so those are in the works.
221
00:08:33,330 --> 00:08:36,199
In the meantime, I do have
some buttery-toasted
222
00:08:36,266 --> 00:08:39,668
black forest ham and cheese
sliders.
223
00:08:40,805 --> 00:08:42,807
Go get 'em.
224
00:08:47,832 --> 00:08:49,575
Hey.
Hey.
225
00:08:49,707 --> 00:08:51,684
- Good to go?
- Oh, yeah.
226
00:08:52,539 --> 00:08:54,105
Ah.
227
00:08:54,592 --> 00:08:57,622
I gotta tell you,
I'm really proud of you.
228
00:08:57,690 --> 00:09:00,809
You took care of business.
TCB.
229
00:09:00,894 --> 00:09:02,293
You know
what I'm talkin' about?
230
00:09:02,361 --> 00:09:04,387
Mm-hmm. Oh, yeah.
231
00:09:05,520 --> 00:09:07,051
But, um...
232
00:09:07,183 --> 00:09:08,254
what took you so long?
233
00:09:08,322 --> 00:09:10,322
Oh! I think something wrong.
234
00:09:11,378 --> 00:09:12,864
You ate?
235
00:09:14,440 --> 00:09:17,106
- She made me ham and cheese sliders, okay?
- Oh, my God.
236
00:09:17,181 --> 00:09:18,872
I was gonna save you one,
but...
237
00:09:19,502 --> 00:09:21,770
I ate it
on the way to the car.
238
00:09:22,049 --> 00:09:23,248
Did you even break up
with her?
239
00:09:23,315 --> 00:09:24,648
No.
240
00:09:25,739 --> 00:09:28,364
In fact, I invited her
to the banquet on Friday.
241
00:09:28,432 --> 00:09:30,372
You disgust me.
242
00:09:30,648 --> 00:09:32,783
I'm so weak.
243
00:09:34,989 --> 00:09:36,598
I mean,
I-I can't believe you!
244
00:09:36,684 --> 00:09:38,859
You go in there to break up with
Wendy, and what do you do?
245
00:09:38,926 --> 00:09:40,676
You get into
even deeper trouble.
246
00:09:40,872 --> 00:09:42,722
You want something
done right...
247
00:09:43,199 --> 00:09:45,035
you gotta do it
yourself.
248
00:09:45,157 --> 00:09:46,491
Hold on!
249
00:09:52,143 --> 00:09:53,210
How'd it go?
250
00:09:53,466 --> 00:09:55,058
It's done.
251
00:09:56,661 --> 00:09:57,897
You didn't hurt her,
did you?
252
00:09:57,965 --> 00:09:59,941
No, I didn't hurt her.
253
00:10:00,222 --> 00:10:01,910
I just explained to her
254
00:10:02,027 --> 00:10:04,629
that I've known you
for 23 years,
255
00:10:04,722 --> 00:10:07,136
and you are
incapable of change.
256
00:10:07,457 --> 00:10:09,176
And no matter
what she cooks,
257
00:10:09,246 --> 00:10:12,340
she is never gonna get you
to commit to her.
258
00:10:12,410 --> 00:10:15,394
She got it.
We're good.
259
00:10:16,288 --> 00:10:17,865
Could you pull over?
260
00:10:17,933 --> 00:10:20,660
No. No, I can't.
We are not going back.
261
00:10:20,777 --> 00:10:22,829
No, I think
I gotta throw up.
262
00:10:26,417 --> 00:10:27,623
Oh, and by the way,
263
00:10:27,691 --> 00:10:29,662
the Islanders are playing
the Rangers on Saturday.
264
00:10:29,730 --> 00:10:30,990
Should we get
some tickets?
265
00:10:31,058 --> 00:10:32,084
I'm in.
266
00:10:32,152 --> 00:10:35,092
Uh, no can do for me.
I'm, uh... I'm busy all day.
267
00:10:35,160 --> 00:10:37,035
I got to go in
for a sleep study.
268
00:10:37,176 --> 00:10:38,418
- What?
- Yeah, I got to
269
00:10:38,486 --> 00:10:39,668
spend the night in a clinic
270
00:10:39,736 --> 00:10:41,457
so they can find out
if I have sleep apnea.
271
00:10:41,525 --> 00:10:42,839
You don't want to mess
with that.
272
00:10:42,907 --> 00:10:46,019
That's a match
you do not touch.
273
00:10:46,438 --> 00:10:48,650
Hey, guy,
you up for the Islanders?
274
00:10:49,351 --> 00:10:50,418
Kev?
275
00:10:50,486 --> 00:10:52,165
Wendy used to make,
um...
276
00:10:52,813 --> 00:10:55,079
She made the taco meat,
a pile of it,
277
00:10:55,147 --> 00:10:57,030
with... with the chopped onions
and the... and the...
278
00:10:57,097 --> 00:10:59,587
And the peppers
and... and garlic.
279
00:10:59,696 --> 00:11:02,486
Wait, wait. Wouldn't that be
all loose and falling apart?
280
00:11:02,595 --> 00:11:04,571
You'd think so.
But here's the kicker.
281
00:11:04,790 --> 00:11:07,332
She wraps it in bacon,
like a safety harness.
282
00:11:07,407 --> 00:11:09,242
Ooh.
283
00:11:09,579 --> 00:11:11,384
- You really gotta stop.
- I can't.
284
00:11:11,501 --> 00:11:13,144
I thought you were getting
through this.
285
00:11:13,212 --> 00:11:15,616
I was, all right? For the first
few days, I had leftovers.
286
00:11:15,683 --> 00:11:18,759
I was able to...
wean myself off.
287
00:11:19,267 --> 00:11:21,642
Like a nicotine patch
with meat.
288
00:11:22,400 --> 00:11:24,564
Very good, Mott, yes.
289
00:11:25,946 --> 00:11:27,993
Ohh. I miss her.
290
00:11:28,259 --> 00:11:29,663
- Am I nervous about it?
- Yeah.
291
00:11:29,731 --> 00:11:31,705
I mean, they put those little
sticky things on your chest.
292
00:11:31,772 --> 00:11:33,087
That's never
for good reasons.
293
00:11:33,509 --> 00:11:36,418
Okay, you know, the thing is,
you don't miss Wendy,
294
00:11:36,486 --> 00:11:37,668
you miss her food.
295
00:11:37,736 --> 00:11:40,603
Okay? Now I will cook for you.
How about that?
296
00:11:40,704 --> 00:11:42,767
Yeah, that's right. I can cook.
297
00:11:42,907 --> 00:11:45,028
I will make you the best
Swedish meatballs you ever had.
298
00:11:45,095 --> 00:11:46,200
I'll come over tonight
and do it.
299
00:11:46,267 --> 00:11:48,254
I mean, and you... you don't
make 'em too big, right?
300
00:11:48,321 --> 00:11:49,149
- I don't make them too big.
- Because you gotta make 'em
301
00:11:49,217 --> 00:11:50,123
- the right size.
- I know what the...
302
00:11:50,191 --> 00:11:51,643
- I don't need your notes.
- Okay.
303
00:11:52,427 --> 00:11:53,702
You-You would do that
304
00:11:53,770 --> 00:11:55,150
- for me?
- I would do that for you.
305
00:11:55,217 --> 00:11:57,115
Once again, folks,
sleep apnea.
306
00:11:57,186 --> 00:11:59,084
I teeter between
life and death.
307
00:11:59,154 --> 00:12:01,623
But let's keep talking about
meatballs.
308
00:12:02,803 --> 00:12:04,584
What's the sauce like?
309
00:12:08,299 --> 00:12:09,500
You know what?
310
00:12:09,763 --> 00:12:12,200
Actually smells really good
in here.
311
00:12:12,397 --> 00:12:14,407
You see?
I told you.
312
00:12:14,475 --> 00:12:15,477
Oh, and, by the way,
313
00:12:15,545 --> 00:12:18,086
I found a bunch
of my grandmother's recipes,
314
00:12:18,154 --> 00:12:19,939
all these great things
that I can make for you
315
00:12:20,006 --> 00:12:21,829
to help you
kick the Wendy habit.
316
00:12:21,897 --> 00:12:23,264
I like it.
317
00:12:23,566 --> 00:12:27,287
Oh, ziti?
Linguini with white clam sauce?
318
00:12:27,459 --> 00:12:28,946
Well, this...
This all looks amazing.
319
00:12:29,014 --> 00:12:30,790
I know. And you know what else
is amazing?
320
00:12:30,858 --> 00:12:32,571
My Swedish meatballs.
321
00:12:32,639 --> 00:12:33,899
- Ooh.
- Try one.
322
00:12:33,967 --> 00:12:35,890
Hey, thank you for taking the time
to do this.it.
323
00:12:35,957 --> 00:12:37,470
- I really do appreciate
- You're welcome, honey.
324
00:12:37,537 --> 00:12:39,678
- I love to see you happy.
- Okay.
325
00:12:40,627 --> 00:12:42,629
It tastes like a cat peed
on an old cheeseburger.
326
00:12:42,821 --> 00:12:45,180
Oh, stop.
It does not.
327
00:12:45,248 --> 00:12:46,650
Stop!
328
00:12:48,428 --> 00:12:50,897
♪ Watch the food go round
and round ♪
329
00:12:50,964 --> 00:12:53,568
♪ Waiting for this thing
to beep ♪
330
00:12:55,943 --> 00:12:57,102
What are you doing?
331
00:12:57,170 --> 00:12:59,836
Oh, hi. I was singing
the microwave song.
332
00:12:59,904 --> 00:13:01,677
Didn't realize
anyone was here.
333
00:13:02,287 --> 00:13:03,537
That food.
334
00:13:04,678 --> 00:13:06,447
That Wendy's?
335
00:13:06,771 --> 00:13:07,990
I don't know.
336
00:13:09,865 --> 00:13:12,055
Don't lie to me.
I recognize the dish.
337
00:13:12,123 --> 00:13:13,828
I put the chip in that handle,
right there.
338
00:13:13,896 --> 00:13:16,670
Fine. It's Wendy's.
She's been cooking for me.
339
00:13:16,787 --> 00:13:18,834
So, what's the big woof?
340
00:13:19,865 --> 00:13:22,578
The "big woof" is,
she was cooking for me first.
341
00:13:22,646 --> 00:13:24,079
And, by the way,
don't you have a girlfriend?
342
00:13:24,146 --> 00:13:25,525
What about Floor?
How's she feel about all that?
343
00:13:25,592 --> 00:13:27,922
Well, when it comes to food,
we have an open relationship.
344
00:13:28,076 --> 00:13:30,740
Actually, right now,
she's having sushi with a Frenchman.
345
00:13:30,857 --> 00:13:32,773
Pbht. I don't care.
346
00:13:33,748 --> 00:13:34,945
Don't you
just have it all?
347
00:13:35,013 --> 00:13:36,280
I guess I have.
348
00:13:36,357 --> 00:13:38,240
I'm ♪blessed.
349
00:13:39,646 --> 00:13:42,271
You-You know, I'm...
I'm sorry.
350
00:13:42,537 --> 00:13:44,500
It's all good.
You just enjoy it.
351
00:13:44,568 --> 00:13:46,193
Do me a favor,
though, please.
352
00:13:46,349 --> 00:13:48,279
Treat her well, okay?
She's good people.
353
00:13:48,412 --> 00:13:49,734
I will, thanks.
354
00:13:49,802 --> 00:13:51,029
Oh, and, by the way,
355
00:13:51,131 --> 00:13:53,404
I don't want you to find
this out on the street.
356
00:13:54,279 --> 00:13:55,782
I'm meeting her
at the banquet dinner.
357
00:13:55,849 --> 00:13:56,997
She's my plus one.
358
00:13:58,279 --> 00:14:00,107
Oh. Happy for you.
359
00:14:00,239 --> 00:14:02,500
- Well, you'll be there.
- No, I won't be, okay?
360
00:14:02,583 --> 00:14:04,309
I'm not going.
It's too painful.
361
00:14:04,466 --> 00:14:05,599
But you were my ride,
362
00:14:05,701 --> 00:14:07,687
so now I'm gonna have to
figure something else out?
363
00:14:07,754 --> 00:14:08,774
Yeah.
Go with Wendy.
364
00:14:08,842 --> 00:14:10,617
I already told you,
she's meeting me there.
365
00:14:10,685 --> 00:14:11,719
Well, then, call Vanessa.
366
00:14:11,787 --> 00:14:13,633
She can't.
She's getting her nails done.
367
00:14:13,701 --> 00:14:15,271
- Get an Uber!
- I don't have the app.
368
00:14:15,357 --> 00:14:16,867
- Download it!
- I don't know how to.
369
00:14:16,935 --> 00:14:17,985
Figure it out!
370
00:14:21,613 --> 00:14:23,014
Hey, bud.
371
00:14:23,334 --> 00:14:24,388
Hey.
372
00:14:24,459 --> 00:14:25,748
Hey, uh, listen,
373
00:14:25,857 --> 00:14:28,945
your dad went through a lot
the last couple days.
374
00:14:29,013 --> 00:14:31,388
Just got some crazy stuff
going on.
375
00:14:31,606 --> 00:14:33,638
And nothin' to be worried about.
I'm gonna be fine.
376
00:14:33,763 --> 00:14:36,654
Um, I was thinking
maybe tonight, uh, I don't know,
377
00:14:36,771 --> 00:14:41,357
you'd like to sit on the couch
and watch a little TV with me?
378
00:14:42,651 --> 00:14:43,785
No, I'm good.
379
00:14:47,478 --> 00:14:49,724
Hey.
How you holding up?
380
00:14:50,254 --> 00:14:52,156
Okay, I guess.
I just...
381
00:14:54,115 --> 00:14:56,196
Well, I was thinking about it,
Dad, and you know what?
382
00:14:56,263 --> 00:14:58,623
I'm... I'm really glad that
you're not going to the banquet.
383
00:14:58,701 --> 00:15:00,992
Really? Yeah. I mean,
you don't need that.
384
00:15:01,060 --> 00:15:02,226
First,
she was cooking for you,
385
00:15:02,293 --> 00:15:04,016
and then she was cooking
for Rootger?
386
00:15:04,084 --> 00:15:05,529
I mean,
that's just weird.
387
00:15:05,912 --> 00:15:07,398
She doesn't deserve you.
388
00:15:07,685 --> 00:15:11,125
Look, I know it's tough,
but you gotta stay strong, okay?
389
00:15:11,193 --> 00:15:14,505
Let's just kick back,
watch a movie, and have a great night.
390
00:15:14,958 --> 00:15:16,653
- Love that.
- Yeah, we're not
391
00:15:16,721 --> 00:15:18,078
even gonna think about
Wendy.
392
00:15:18,169 --> 00:15:20,123
- About who?
- Exactly.
393
00:15:22,326 --> 00:15:25,248
Mm. You know how I know
you made the right decision?
394
00:15:25,412 --> 00:15:27,037
These Swedish meatballs
Wendy made?
395
00:15:27,107 --> 00:15:28,420
Swing and a miss.
396
00:15:28,990 --> 00:15:30,388
No, those are Vanessa's.
397
00:15:30,466 --> 00:15:32,366
I heard Wendy's
were off the charts.
398
00:15:32,973 --> 00:15:34,748
Run to her.
399
00:15:37,255 --> 00:15:38,810
I'm comin', baby!
400
00:15:41,399 --> 00:15:43,131
We get
one night out a month,
401
00:15:43,217 --> 00:15:44,693
and we gotta go
to a work thing?
402
00:15:44,763 --> 00:15:46,388
Look around.
It's fancy.
403
00:15:46,471 --> 00:15:49,763
It's ballroom
at a Massapequa motor lodge.
404
00:15:51,568 --> 00:15:53,724
Still,
very tastefully done.
405
00:15:53,873 --> 00:15:56,086
Hey, man, the only reason
I didn't bring Didi
406
00:15:56,154 --> 00:15:58,154
is 'cause we said
we weren't bringing wives.
407
00:15:58,373 --> 00:16:00,318
I appreciate that, dawg.
408
00:16:01,060 --> 00:16:03,164
And look at these stale
supermarket rolls.
409
00:16:03,232 --> 00:16:05,209
Oh, don't worry.
I brought my own.
410
00:16:05,279 --> 00:16:07,084
Of course, she did.
411
00:16:07,958 --> 00:16:09,427
These are amazing.
412
00:16:09,572 --> 00:16:11,138
Rustic sourdough.
413
00:16:11,295 --> 00:16:13,201
- Thank you!
- Mm-hmm.
414
00:16:13,497 --> 00:16:14,619
Who are you?
415
00:16:14,772 --> 00:16:16,709
Oh, I'm Wendy.
Heads up.
416
00:16:20,538 --> 00:16:23,219
She's the reason
why Kevin's not here.
417
00:16:23,287 --> 00:16:25,427
She's the Yoko
of Monkey Fist.
418
00:16:25,495 --> 00:16:26,920
Ahh.
419
00:16:28,248 --> 00:16:29,339
Excuse me. Excuse me.
420
00:16:29,547 --> 00:16:30,681
What?
421
00:16:30,748 --> 00:16:33,317
Wendy.
What are you doing here?
422
00:16:33,384 --> 00:16:35,320
I just need to talk to you
for a second, okay?
423
00:16:35,387 --> 00:16:36,887
Now hear me out, please.
424
00:16:36,954 --> 00:16:38,823
It's too late.
It's never too late.
425
00:16:38,890 --> 00:16:41,359
Kevin, I am literally
begging you to stop.
426
00:16:41,426 --> 00:16:43,528
No, I gotta...
I gotta do this.
427
00:16:43,933 --> 00:16:45,792
Now you answer me this.
428
00:16:46,454 --> 00:16:47,956
Can he do what I do?
429
00:16:49,033 --> 00:16:51,469
Does Rootger eat your food
the way that I eat it?
430
00:16:52,003 --> 00:16:53,753
It's... different.
431
00:16:53,863 --> 00:16:55,194
Let me ask you this.
When he returns
432
00:16:55,261 --> 00:16:56,652
a-a casserole pan,
433
00:16:56,720 --> 00:16:59,555
is it empty, or is there
a little food left in it?
434
00:16:59,710 --> 00:17:01,894
- Maybe a little, I don't know.
- Well, I do.
435
00:17:02,113 --> 00:17:04,058
I got 50 pounds on him!
436
00:17:04,233 --> 00:17:06,386
He, or nobody else...
You, either...
437
00:17:06,454 --> 00:17:08,356
Will eat the way I eat!
438
00:17:10,621 --> 00:17:12,308
Now, you look me
in the eye...
439
00:17:13,558 --> 00:17:16,730
If you tell me you're happy,
I promise you, I'll...
440
00:17:17,269 --> 00:17:20,550
I'll walk out that door
and you'll never see me again.
441
00:17:23,196 --> 00:17:24,628
I'm happy.
442
00:17:27,519 --> 00:17:28,855
Okay.
443
00:17:29,652 --> 00:17:31,456
There it is.
Sorry.
444
00:17:31,956 --> 00:17:34,214
I'm happy
cooking for you.
445
00:17:36,146 --> 00:17:37,847
Swedish meatballs?
446
00:17:38,035 --> 00:17:40,021
- Swedish meatballs.
- Let's go!
447
00:17:40,089 --> 00:17:41,452
And then after,
we can see a movie?
448
00:17:41,520 --> 00:17:43,050
- Not even close!
- Okay!
449
00:17:47,221 --> 00:17:48,410
Man.
450
00:17:49,316 --> 00:17:51,910
This is literally the best roll
I ever had in my life.
451
00:17:55,495 --> 00:17:56,572
I'm glad we put the
452
00:17:56,640 --> 00:17:57,951
- Wendy thing behind us.
- Yeah.
453
00:17:58,019 --> 00:18:00,011
And we both agree
not to eat her food, right?
454
00:18:00,230 --> 00:18:01,863
- Hear, hear.
- All right.
455
00:18:02,660 --> 00:18:04,628
See, now, this is what
I'm talking about.
456
00:18:04,980 --> 00:18:07,495
Two guys seeing a movie,
no one bugging us.
457
00:18:08,128 --> 00:18:09,287
Mm.
458
00:18:09,449 --> 00:18:11,160
- Oh, here we go.
- All right.
459
00:18:19,160 --> 00:18:20,498
Now, who's the guy
with the beard?
460
00:18:20,573 --> 00:18:23,222
- He was in something else.
- Shh.
461
00:18:23,290 --> 00:18:24,355
Keep it down, man.
462
00:18:24,423 --> 00:18:25,899
I don't know.
We'll find out.
463
00:18:28,782 --> 00:18:30,510
Ooh!
I had a car like that,
464
00:18:30,658 --> 00:18:32,150
but it had bigger rims
than that one.
465
00:18:32,218 --> 00:18:34,082
- Okay, Rootger.
- Really nice light blue.
466
00:18:34,150 --> 00:18:36,361
Rootger,
no one gives a crap. Shh.
467
00:18:36,463 --> 00:18:38,432
We got to watch.
Come on, man.
468
00:18:45,931 --> 00:18:47,627
I never noticed this before,
but, uh,
469
00:18:47,760 --> 00:18:50,494
your ear
looks like a question mark.
470
00:18:51,158 --> 00:18:52,463
- You know, it's like...
- What?
471
00:18:52,530 --> 00:18:54,478
- All it needs is a little bit of a...
- Shh!
472
00:18:54,658 --> 00:18:57,744
You-You touch me, I swear,
I will try to beat the crap out of you.
473
00:18:57,812 --> 00:18:59,588
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