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It makes total sense.
Coop and Sam run into each other at a bar, or at a party, a barbecue.
They've both been cheated on.
He's hot. She's hot.
They're both lonely, they're both drunk.
Low-hanging fruit.
The only surprise would be if they didn't start fucking.
So then time goes by. I don't know. Three months, six months.
They keep it quiet 'cause, you know, Mel and Paul and everyone else.
But then Paul finds out about it.
He goes after Coop, and Coop kills him.
Self-defense. Crime of passion. Something...
That's ridiculous.
Unless someone shows me incontrovertible evidence,
I just won't believe that Coop's a murderer.
I mean, come on, we've all known him for years.
Yeah, but somehow none of us knew about him and Sam hooking up, right?
I'm just saying.
We don't know everything there is to know about Coop.
Or Sam, apparently.
Paul's been cheating on her for years.
He's being a bastard about the divorce. Maybe she just snapped and killed him.
Or, most likely, someone unrelated.
I mean, who knows what Paul may have been into?
Sam was up in Boston with her parents when it happened.
I'm sure the police checked her alibi.
Grace, did you speak to Mel?
Left her a voicemail. Been tied up.
Oh, my God. That's right. How's Barney doing?
Well, he's home, which is good. I guess.
Dislocated shoulder, cracked rib, now this.
I'm keeping him sedated for my own sanity.
Is anyone else noticing an uptick in violence around here?
I mean, what the hell?
I spoke to Mel last night.
She's pissed at him but she's also pretty sure that he's innocent.
He's the father of her children. Of course she is.
He didn't look innocent when they arrested him.
No one looks innocent in handcuffs.
Like I said, it could've been someone else entirely. Or a mistake.
Murder is always a mistake.
One should not do anything one cannot talk about after dinner.
Oscar Wilde said that.
What?
I'm telling you.
Paul walked in on them, things got heated. Bam.
Paul's got his skanky waitress. Why would he care?
Men are territorial. Bro code. Whatever.
So your theory is that Coop is having sex with Sam in her house,
not at all deterred by the fact that she's 200 miles away.
And while they're defying the laws of physics with this long-distance fuck-fest,
Paul, who no longer lives there, nevertheless walks in on them.
And in this scenario you've concocted,
Coop, who has never shot a gun in his life,
has a gun that he has never owned on him or near him since he's
- ostensibly not wearing any pants. - I'm not saying I have all the answers.
They were fuck buddies.
You don't kill over a fuck buddy.
You don't know that it wasn't more than that.
Coop is not in love with Samantha Levitt.
How do you know?
Because he's still in love with Mel.
If Coop was gonna kill anyone, he would've killed Nick a long time ago,
but he didn't. You know why?
Because Coop's not a murderer.
This whole situation is just beyond.
He just stood there at the memorial service,
like everything was perfectly fine.
Because he didn't do it.
Of course.
Or he's a sociopath.
Okay. Suz, really? What the... I...
So, are we still going to the Miller's cancer gala?
- Absolutely. Of course. - Yeah.
Mr. Cooper.
Mr. Cooper.
Andrew Cooper.
Yes, Your Honor.
You've had the opportunity to confer with your attorney,
and you understand the charges against you?
Yes, Your Honor.
And you're entering a plea of not guilty.
- Yes, Your Honor. - So recorded.
Lawyers, see my clerk next door to confirm the trial date.
Bail is set at $250,000.
So, what happens now?
Judge Wood will give us a month or so for discovery before we go to trial.
The prosecutor's a lightweight. There'll probably be a deal to be made.
I don't want a deal.
Suit yourself.
- I didn't kill him, Kat. - I didn't ask.
Well, why the fuck not?
Can you give us a minute?
Why didn't you ask? Why?
Because it doesn't matter.
I'm a setup, okay?
I'm telling you. A lot of people hated Paul.
It could've been Sam, it could've been anyone who found out we were involved.
I mean, I'm the perfect scapegoat.
That's not how cases are won in real life.
- Then how? - Well, traditionally,
not by blackmailing your attorney.
Look, we chip away at their case, attacking them on procedure,
chain of evidence, witness credibility, expert testimony,
and if we do it well, we establish reasonable doubt.
And you think you can do all that?
The gun in your car is gonna be tricky.
Kat.
I don't lose, Coop.
Your bail's been sorted out.
I'll have preliminary discovery by Thursday.
In the meantime, for God's sake, try to stay out of trouble.
Any way I can get the car that goes with these?
Andy.
Thanks, Dad.
Here. I thought you might be hungry.
Made you a turkey sandwich.
I'm not sure what you eat these days, but that used to be your favorite.
It's gonna be okay.
Dad, I'm not sure that it is.
Well, let's get you home.
You look like you could use a shower and a nap.
Just drop me off at Mel's.
You want me to wait?
No. I'll be fine.
Hey, where did you get the money for the bail?
My IRA.
Dad, you're gonna get killed on the taxes.
It is what it is.
All right. Well, I'll pay you back.
Hey. I'd say you got bigger fish to fry.
What are you doing here?
It's Tuesday.
Come on, Mel. I just wanna talk to the kids.
- About what? - I don't know.
To maybe ask how school's going.
Maybe to tell them that their father's not a murderer.
- Come on, Mel. You know me. - Come on?
You know I wouldn't do anything like this.
I don't know anything.
I don't what you been up to. I don't know who you're fucking.
- I don't know why... - Seriously?
...a few days ago your kids and I watched you get beaten half to death.
All I know is you've been arrested for murder.
So until I know something different,
I don't want you around them.
You've put them through enough.
This was once my house.
This was once my entire world.
It was amazing really,
the infinite amount of times the same damn thing could break your heart.
Hello?
You're back early.
I thought that if I just pushed it into piles, it would look cleaner,
but then I found some old records, and... Yeah, it's a lot.
How you feeling?
Like I just spent the night in jail. How about you?
You know, same old, same old.
Well, let's get a bunch of garbage bags and start cleaning up.
Okay.
We should probably start in the basement 'cause the cops really fucked it up.
If the cops had found the money, it would've come up in the interrogation.
I didn't have time to contemplate the irony of getting robbed.
I just wanted my money back.
Hey. Where is she?
- She's busy. Hey! - Lu! Lu!
She don't wanna see you, man.
Do I look like I give a shit?
Are you fucking kidding me?
Come on.
- Come on! Come on. - Yeah?
What are you gonna do with that?
Put it down, Coop.
Come inside. We'll talk like people.
Here.
I got five minutes.
- I got a meat stew on the stove. - Did you rob me?
I don't rob people.
I sit here in my chair and people like you bring me things.
Well, my money is gone.
You're in a cash business. It happens.
- Christian? - Christian took his pound of flesh.
- You told him where to find me. - Yes, I did.
After I talked him out of killing you.
Which was what was gonna happen.
From what I can see, you got off light.
- You could've warned me. - I did.
I told you no art, but you only hear what you wanna hear.
There are rules to this game.
You need to learn them.
You disrespected Christian.
He responded.
Action, reaction.
The slate is clean. He'll do business now,
but from what I hear, you've got bigger problems.
And just when you were starting to show some real promise.
My stew's burning.
Hey, I didn't kill anyone.
That just makes it even more pathetic.
Don't come back here.
How's it going, Fรฉlix?
Ecuador is kicking our ass.
That's everything Chivo owes you.
That's good.
I didn't know housekeeping paid so well.
I could put you on if you want.
We good?
'Til next time.
No.
No next time.
Chivo doesn't work for you anymore.
You hand me a bag of money. And you think you can talk to me like that?
Please, Fรฉlix.
I changed your diapers.
Be very careful how you talk to me.
This is me being careful.
Say hi to your mother.
Hey. You okay?
I just feel like we just stopped getting stared at from us being a thing.
And now this.
Hold your head up.
You didn't do anything wrong.
I feel like I shouldn't have sent them to school.
Well, you didn't send them. They went.
This is a coffee shop.
Imagine what it feels like in high school.
I'm gonna tell them they can come home.
If they need to come home, they'll come home.
You know, it's taking too long. Come on, let's go down to Phil's.
We're almost there.
Then we'll wait another ten minutes for the damn coffee. Come on, let's go.
Yeah, I appreciate that.
She's here. Yeah.
I'll see you guys later.
I just...
I don't even know how to begin to unravel this.
I just... I know that it's complicated but I...
Is it complicated?
- Yeah. - You fuck Coop.
I fuck Nick.
Maybe you should fuck Nick and I can fuck somebody else...
- That's your takeaway from all of this? - ...since that's what we do here.
Mel, Coop killed my husband.
He didn't kill anybody.
You don't know.
He's been in a really dark place.
Fucking my ex-husband doesn't make you some kind of expert on him.
I understand this is hard for you to accept,
but Coop and I were very close.
- Yeah? - Yeah.
Well, I just slept with him so maybe you weren't quite as close as you think.
- I'm sorry, what? - Glass houses, Nick.
What the fuck is that supposed to mean?
- So why are you so angry at me then? - Unbelievable.
What? You lied to me!
I was scared to tell you.
- There's a difference. - There's a reason
- you were scared to tell me. - Can we talk somewhere else?
Why were you scared to tell me?
Mel. I am still your friend.
You're not my friend. You're a gold-digging widow
who's trying to milk every last drop of sympathy
over a dead husband you fucking hated.
Oh, shit.
No, Mel.
- Fuck you! - Mel, stop, please.
- Nick. - Fuck you, Mel.
Door?
You're my ride.
Call Coop.
What? What are they looking at?
What? Is it my dad?
No. It's your mom.
...sympathy over a dead husband you fucking hated.
Oh, shit.
No, Mel.
- Fuck you. - Mel.
You saw the video?
Yeah.
My dad's out on bail,
my mom's throwing down in coffee shops.
Well, on the plus side, you're gonna have a killer college essay.
If it's any consolation,
everyone's parents are fucked up to one degree or another.
But the thing is, you're not.
Have you met me?
Sorry. I thought you were...
Idiot.
Ali. What the hell?
I was cleaning and I found this.
It's yours.
I thought I'd drop it off to you.
You've had that for, like, 15 years.
Yeah.
And I also thought we could talk.
We can't. Not here. Just call me.
I have been calling.
And texting.
Ali, I have a family.
I can't just talk whenever I want to.
You're putting me in a really uncomfortable position.
Well,
do you want your record back?
What?
No, keep the fucking record. Just...
I'll call you.
But don't come back here again.
Remember, Sully, when I promised to kill you last?
That's right, Matrix! You did!
I lied.
So, now you don't have a car?
Oh, Nick. What are you doing here?
Like every time I get my bearings, one of them just blows up my life.
- What the fuck is wrong with them? - Yeah.
It's kind of terrifying when you realize you're the grown-up.
But I'm not. That's my point.
I still need them to be my goddamn parents.
It sounds like they're too wrapped up in their own dramas to really do the job.
And fuck all of these people who just assume he's guilty.
My dad may be a fuck-up, but he's not a murderer. I mean, Jesus!
- What? - What?
- What? - He didn't do it.
It's perfectly natural for you to feel that way
but you can't actually know that, right?
I know my father.
I just think it's important for you to understand
why some people might believe he did it.
He was fucking the guy's wife.
Okay, can we please not talk about who my dad is fucking?
The cops wouldn't have arrested a rich white guy like your dad unless
- they had some evidence to back it up. - You cannot be serious.
Plus, he does have a history of violence.
He's not violent at all.
He punched me in the dick.
You're unbelievable.
Come on.
- Hey, he's your father. - Get out of my way.
You have his back, I have yours. Trust me.
Yeah, trust the college guy dating a high school girl.
- Get out of my way. - Tori, just quit being a drama queen...
- Hi. For Tori? - Yep.
Hey, man, I'm sorry about your face.
It's all right. It's entirely possible I deserved it.
Yeah.
It's open!
Nick, what are you doing here?
I came to punch Coop in the face.
You and me both.
No. Bullshit. That's your good arm in the sling.
Like I'd waste my good arm on you.
Gentlemen, things being what they are,
I suggest we go out and get well and truly hammered.
Yeah, tonight's been unbelievable.
This happens everywhere we go.
Don't you ever wonder why he's always in a good mood?
That is why.
- So you guys talk things out? - Not at all.
But I'm a little short on friends these days.
Maybe stop getting them hit by cars.
I gotta say, the booze is mixing nicely with my Vicodin.
Okay. Excuse me.
All right, fellas.
- Uh-oh. - Here we go.
These are from them.
- Thank you, ladies. - Hello, ladies.
Hello. Thank you.
Lift 'em high and drain 'em dry.
All right. Here we go.
Oh, yeah.
Decent.
Hey B, you tell Coop about the pool?
No.
- Sorry, what's this? - It's gonna sound worse than it is.
- There's a Coop conviction pool. - Wow.
Actually, now that he says it out loud, it sounds pretty fucking bad.
Okay. What's the action?
I don't know. You're my friend. I stayed out of it.
- Barney? - What? Well, I'm with Nick.
- Fine, but I took innocent. - There it is.
Though I parlayed it with reasonable doubt.
- Smart play. - Jules has you down for murder one.
- Jesus. - Lady's got balls.
- Coop. I don't believe it. - Oh, my God.
Look what the cat dragged in.
Hey, Coop. So great to see ya.
How you doing?
Holy shit. You're Nick Brandes.
- I am. - Toby and Josh used to work for me.
And the place has become a shit show without you, man.
Oh, come on. That can't be true.
No, he's fucking serious, man.
I don't know what you heard, but Rome is burning.
The Swiss are threatening to pull out.
- Is that right? - Totally.
Jack is losing his shit over it.
Dude, this is awesome.
I wore your number in college.
- Yeah, you played? - Yeah, D3, man.
I'm very, very white.
But I bought two of your fucking toilets. Changed my life.
My man.
Can we get a waiter over here? We're buying these motherfuckers
- some drinks. - Guys.
- Keep it coming... - Hey!
I take it from your general demeanor, you boys are on cocaine?
Yeah, that's the good stuff.
I mean, I think I could get past the fact that she cheated on me,
but it's almost as if she's angry at me that she cheated, you know what I mean?
Oh. Yeah.
Hey, did you get those murder charges cleared up yet, man?
I'm working on it.
Evan here, he did six months for tax evasion.
It was nine months and fucking worth it.
It was in Otisville which is basically like a fucking summer camp.
Yeah, I worked on my tennis game
and came out with some serious fucking contacts.
Nothing but whales up there. I'm doing deals with three of them now.
Fuck, yeah, Coop. You should go to Otisville, man.
Yeah. Or maybe I'll just get a fucking acquittal.
This is the best I've felt in ages.
Hey, buddy. Take it easy there.
Take it easy? No, no.
There's no taking it easy.
- I'm back. - Okay.
Choi boy's back, Choi boy's back,
Choi boy's back back again.
Choi boy's back...
Shit, Barney.
Buddy?
So, this whole murder thing.
- Yeah? - I gotta say, I didn't see it coming.
You think you're gonna beat it?
Barney.
We are shit-faced on a golf course at midnight,
so why don't you ask me what you wanna ask me.
Because I don't wanna ask you.
And here's the scary thing.
I don't know that I really care.
- So if you did do it... - Okay, I didn't kill him.
Okay. Okay, that's good.
That's good.
But, let the record show, I didn't ask.
Are you scared?
That's a stupid question, I'm sorry.
How's the renovation going?
Well, I almost burned it down the other night.
Are you in trouble on it? What?
I honestly can't tell.
We've got rooms in this house we've never even used.
Now we're building more.
Grace spends too much.
I spend too much. It's like a bodily function at this point.
We eat, we drink, we buy all this shit.
Then we talk about the shit we bought,
and then we talk about other shit we're gonna buy,
and then we go buy that.
Sometimes I just walk around the house and I...
I just look at the sheer volume of shit we have and it fucking mystifies me.
I mean, when did we become these people, you know, like when did...
when did our lives get so empty...
that we have to constantly stuff them full of all this shit.
I don't know what happened to me.
I don't think any of us do, buddy.
Something's going on with you. You don't have to tell me what.
But I just wanted you to know, that I know.
I don't know what I know.
But I know.
Something happened to me, man.
I don't even know if I can explain it. It's...
I got fired and the ground just shifted.
Everything I thought I knew, that was solid, fucking permanent just...
I don't know.
I don't know.
I was wrong about all the rules.
It turns out there are no rules.
So anyway, I've been breaking into people's houses
and stealing stuff from them.
Oh, fuck. My car.
Where is it?
It's impounded.
I have to go see Kat in the city today.
That's cool. I'll send Wally back for you after he drops me off.
You sure?
Wally, you good working today?
- Yeah, you got it, Nick. - Problem solved.
God bless you.
All right, fellas.
Thank you. Last night was something.
Yeah. Let's never do it again.
When Hunter was four-years-old,
he would come running into our bedroom in the middle of the night,
terrified by whatever demons four-year-olds come up with
in their dreams.
I'd pull him into bed with me and he'd fall asleep in my arms.
That was all it took to make him feel safe.
It gets harder when they get older,
to protect them from all the things that might scare them
or hurt them in any way.
But you never stop trying.
And then one day you realize the thing that's hurting them is you.
What the hell happened to you?
It was a long night.
You know, I...
I came by to see you yesterday.
Mom told me.
Well, that was nice of her.
It would have been nicer if she let you in.
Look, she's just...
she's just doing what she thinks is best, you know?
But hey, pal.
I wanna tell you I'm sorry.
For all this nonsense.
First the divorce and now this mess.
I never wanted any of this to happen.
But I know that doesn't make it any easier on you,
so I just wanted to say I'm sorry.
Dad. Are you going to jail?
Okay, Hunter.
This is important.
Whatever else happens I need you to hear this, okay?
I did not kill Paul. I had nothing to do with that.
I know you didn't.
That's why I came here to tell you that.
I appreciate that.
So I'm not going to go to jail for something I didn't do.
All right?
Now, I have a meeting today with Kat Resnick,
who is the best at what she does.
And we're gonna figure this out. Okay?
Well, you should probably shower first.
- You stink. - Thank you. Good note.
Anything else?
I have a girlfriend.
- Good morning. - Shit.
Rough night?
I'll give you a thousand dollars for that cup of coffee.
Fucking hell, Grace.
I thought you looked bad in the hospital.
All right, I know what you're gonna say.
Doesn't really pay to say it then, does it.
He's my best friend, Grace.
I think maybe you need to start coming to terms
with the idea that your best friend may go to prison for murder.
He didn't do it.
- Do you know that? - Don't you?
You don't know everything, Barney.
Well, I know enough.
And you do, too.
I don't even know enough about you.
What's that supposed to mean?
Found that in your sweater drawer.
Please tell me this has nothing to do with Coop.
You and me, Barney, right?
You and me before anyone else.
You and me.
Drink up.
I'll run you a bath.
- Morning. - Morning, Mel.
- Hi. - How are you doing, Mel?
Okay.
I was hoping we could talk.
I do have an eleven o'clock though.
Your eleven o'clock cancelled.
A number of your patients have cancelled.
How many?
Because of Coop?
No. Not because of Coop.
...over a dead husband you fucking hated.
Oh, shit.
- No, Mel. Come on. - Fuck you!
Oh, Christ. Okay. Yeah.
I can't imagine what you and your family are going through,
- the stress your under. - I'm fine, Deb.
I don't think you are.
I'm under some pressure,
- but I'm perfectly... - You assaulted that woman.
She hit me first!
Whoa. Is that what I'm supposed to tell the parents of our patients?
That it's all fine because "she started it?"
It was self-defense.
It was cognitive aggression.
- Okay, don't do that. - What?
Don't try to shrink me.
I'm trying to have a conversation with you.
Come on, Deb.
Haven't you ever, in your entire life, just wanted to hit somebody?
Of course I have. But I didn't.
Well, maybe you should have.
'Cause I gotta tell you, it's a lot more therapeutic than just wanting to.
A moment of self-concordance, actually.
And isn't that what we try to instill here? In our patients?
- Mel. - She fucked my husband.
And accused him of murder.
Your ex-husband.
What?
Whatever?
Mel, I think right now, you need help.
Uh-uh.
I'm putting you on leave.
I'm sorry.
What, right now?
What happened to "I don't lose"?
Sometimes a plea deal is a win.
Not when I didn't do it.
Come on, Kat. If this is about me coercing you, then...
You're not coercing me, you're blackmailing me.
And, no, regardless of what kind of shit you are and what kind of slut I am,
we raised our kids together and I actually don't think you killed Paul.
But I'm required to lay out your options.
- I've gone through the discovery. - And?
As your lawyer, I'm telling you we should consider a plea deal.
They had two labs confirm your DNA at the crime scene.
Murder weapon in your trunk.
Do you have something you want to share that could help explain some of this?
You lied about your relationship with Sam.
- She lied about it too. - She was in Boston.
It was Henry's birthday.
- What? - Nothing.
Coop.
If we plead, you could be out before Hunter graduates college.
Are you kidding me?
I'm trying to help you.
By putting me in jail?
Come on, Kat, don't fuck me on this.
You did that to yourself.
Coop. I have talks like these every day
and I have to tell you,
I don't think a jury is going to find you to be truthful.
- Why not? - Because you're not telling the truth.
- About what? - All of it.
I don't believe that you were alone in that nightclub,
I don't believe you hung out with your sister afterwards,
and I don't believe your blood was on the floor just because you were fucking Sam.
Whatever it is that you're not telling me,
now would be a great time to tell me.
- It's complicated. - Yeah.
Because I only handle the really simple murder trials.
How'd that gun get in your car?
- I don't know. - Bullshit, Coop.
Give me something.
I told you I didn't kill him.
And I told you, it doesn't matter.
Goddamn it.
Thanks, man. All right.
Hey.
- Is that Nick's car? - Yeah.
My car is currently impounded to possibly be used as evidence against me.
Hey, if this is about Hunter coming over to talk, I didn't tell him to...
Wait, Hunter came over to talk?
No.
I can't even get two syllables out of that kid.
Yeah. Well, what can I say. I have a gift.
I got fired today.
Fuck. Because of me?
I'm actually capable of losing my job all by myself.
I...
I got in a fight with Sam.
Like, an argument?
Yeah, like that.
And then I punched her in the face.
Yeah, I know. I saw the video.
What the fuck are you asking me for, then?
'Cause I wanted to hear you say it.
Were you defending my honor?
She called you a murderer.
Yeah. It's kind of getting to where neither one of us can show our faces
around here, huh?
You're not one, right?
A murderer?
No. I'm not.
Sorry for asking.
Glad you did.
What does Kat say, can you beat this thing?
She has floated the idea of a plea bargain to which I said, "Go fuck yourself".
Good.
How did this become our lives?
You rarely destroy your life in a single moment.
It's usually a series of moments, over time.
When reality finally came crashing down on me I could see
every one of those moments perfectly lined up,
as if it was all by my own design.
So the question wasn't "How did this happen to me?"
The only real question was "How the fuck did I not see it coming?"
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