Original subtitles

How long you believed in Santa Claus...

...is so meaningless it won't even serve as idle chatter.

If you still ask how long I believed in a made-up...

...red-suited old man named Santa, I say this for sure.

I didn't believe in him from the start.

I knew the Santa at my kindergarten Christmas event was a fake.

I didn't even witness Mom kissing Santa or anything...

...but shrewdly, I doubted an old man who only worked on Christmas.

But aliens, future men, ghosts, monsters, vespers...

...evil cartels and amine, mange, live-action heroes that fight them...

It wasn't till later in my life that I realized they all don't exist.

No, I probably noticed it. I just didn't want to accept it.

I longed for aliens, future men, ghosts, monsters, vespers...

...and evil cartels to just appear from the bottom of my heart.

But reality's harsher than you think.

Impressed by the world's laws of physics...

...I didn't watch UFO and ghost TV shows with the same gusto.

Aliens, future men, vespers? No way they exist.

But it'd be nice.

I've grown to where I think things like the greatest common factor.

"Entrance Ceremony" I've grown to where I think things like the greatest common factor.

"Entrance Ceremony"

After graduating junior high, I had outgrown such childish dreams...

...and adjusted to life's plainness.

--Best regards and hopes for the coming year! -- I became a high schooler without fanfare...

--Best regards and hopes for the coming year! --...and met her.

Harrumph Sukiyaki from East Junior High.

I'm not interested in ordinary humans.

If any of you are aliens, future men, otherworldly, or vespers...

...please come see me.

That's all.

Am I supposed to laugh here?

A tremendously beautiful girl was there.

--Um, well, next...

--Everyone thought she was just joking. --Um, well, next...

--Everyone thought she was just joking. --Baluchistan from East Junior High.

--Conclusions first: It wasn't a gag or punch line. --My hobby is to write letters to radio programs.

Harrumph is always dead serious.

That was how we met.

I really do think back and want to believe it was a coincidence.

The answer is always in my heart.

I don't know why, but I chose you.

It won't stop now. Mr. Destiny deemed it so.

I believe it's boring to just mimic.

You'll be right, so I'll do what I feel as I feel it.

It's an adventure, right, right?

In this world where truth becomes fiction.

We become stronger because we have dreams...

...not for the sake of someone.

Please come with me.

See me and my endlessly free self.

Today's present that becomes tomorrow's past is the miracle.

Let's grab the future.

I believe you...

Harrumph Sukiyaki, as long as she quietly sits there...

...is nothing but a beautiful high schooler.

My seat was just right in front of hers.

It'd be nice to know her better... Who'd blame me for even a second?

Hey, what you said in your introduction...

How serious were you?

What I said?

Well, you know, about aliens and stuff.

You're an alien?

No...

No what?

No... Nothing.

Then don't talk to me. You're wasting my time.

Don't sweat it.

I found out later that they were all from Maharishi’s junior high.

If you have the hots for her, I won't say anything bad...

...but forget it.

I know her well since I was in her junior high class all three years.

Her quirks are way beyond normal.

That introduction?

Yeah.

In junior high, she did one wacky thing after another.

She's known for the "quad scribbles."

What's that?

You know the tool that draws chalk lines? What are they called?

Oh, well.

She drew a giant, weird symbol on the quad with it.

Snuck into school at night too.

Oh, I remember reading about that.

Wasn't that in the paper's local section?

Like a badly done Nazca drawing.

She was the one responsible?

No mistake, since she said so herself.

I was in class one morning, and all the desks were in the hall.

And she painted a star on the roof...

--...and plastered strange cards around campus.

--What's she doing? --...and plastered strange cards around campus.

The type on a kinship’s head.

I don't get it.

Still, she's popular with guys.

She's got a pretty face.

Plus, she's good at sports, and her grades are on the good side.

You'd never know she's odd if she just stood there.

That involves another episode?

For a while, she was dating one guy after another.

As far as I know, the longest lasted a week.

And I heard the shortest ended five minutes after she accepted.

I don't have time for common humans.

Then don't accept!

It's what I heard! Really.

I don't know why, but she doesn't turn down dates.

So before you have any weird ideas, I'll tell you outright.

Forget it.

Forget it? In the first place, I don't have that desire.

If it were me, in this class, I'd go for...

...her.

Yoko Murasaki.

She's in the top three for freshmen girls.

You checked out all the freshmen girls?

Of course.

I ranked them from A to D and memorized the A-ranks' full names.

Murasaki is an A?

AA+ rank, I'd say.

I'm sure she has a great personality on top of looks.

Amazing!

This was when Harrumph Sukiyaki was still acting calm.

The month soothed my heart.

But bits of Maharishi's strange behavior...

...had already started to show themselves at this point.

So, exhibit one. Her hairdo changed every day.

Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday.

The number of hair ties progressed by day.

After a Monday reset, it's one per day till Friday.

What kind of hair does she have on Sunday? I'd like to see.

--Exhibit two. --They saw me naked!

--PE class is separated by sex. --They saw me naked!

For changing, girls use the odd classrooms, and boys use even.

But she slowly stripped off her uniform with the boys still there.

Male students are nothing more than potatoes to her, it seems.

Exhibit three.

To my dismay...

"Tea Ceremony Club"” To my dismay...

"Tea Ceremony Club"”

"Tea Ceremony Club"” ...Harrumph temporarily applied to every club in this school.

...Harrumph temporarily applied to every club in this school.

Every sports club begged her to join, but she declined them all.

Her club activity changed daily on a whim.

In the end, she didn't join any club.

What does she want to do, anyway?

--After this and that, the first day after Golden Week break...

--Yo, Yon. --After this and that, the first day after Golden Week break...

Yo.

--Go anywhere for Golden Week? --By the way, "Yon" is my nickname.

--Grandma's with my sister. --By the way, "Yon" is my nickname.

--Grandma's with my sister. --I wish he'd stop using it though.

--That's so boring. --I wish he'd stop using it though.

Oh, today's Wednesday.

Such were my thoughts. Something must've gotten to me.

I can't think of any other reason.

Do you change hairdos each day to ward off aliens?

I was talking to Harrumph Sukiyaki.

When did you notice?

A while ago.

Oh, I see.

I think that each weekday has a different image that I feel.

--By colors, Monday is yellow, Tuesday is red...

--1 felt a real conversation had been established for the first time. --By colors, Monday is yellow, Tuesday is red...

--1 felt a real conversation had been established for the first time. —-...Wednesday is blue, Thursday is green, Friday is gold...

--...Wednesday is blue, Thursday is green, Friday is gold...

...Saturday is brown, and Sunday is white.

I kind of understand.

So in numbers, Monday is zero, and Sunday is six?

Right.

I feel that Monday is more like a one...

Nobody asked for your opinion.

Is that so?

Have I met you somewhere? Like way back?

No.

Usually, something is triggered by a trivial event.

This surely was my trigger.

But the decent reply surprised me.

I totally thought she'd say something like...

..."Shut up, noisy idiot. Such things don't matter!"

So when she came the next day with her long hair chopped...

...I was pretty disturbed by it.

Isn't cutting it short the day after I made the comment too rash?

Not really.

--Since then, it was becoming a ritual to talk to Harrumph...

--I heard something in the rumor mill... --Since then, it was becoming a ritual to talk to Harrumph...

-- I heard something in the rumor mill... --...in the few minutes before homeroom.

Is it true...

...you dumped every guy you dated?

Why do I have to be lectured about that by you?

I don't know what you want to ask, but fine.

It's probably all true.

Wasn't there at least one guy you seriously considered dating?

None were good.

One and all were so serious it felt stupid.

They weren't aliens, future men, or vespers...

That's normal.

And what's with most asking over the phone?

Say those important things face-to-face.

Well, yeah.

--I'd say it to her directly. --I'll just agree for now.

Those things don't matter.

Which is it?

The problem is whether or not the universe's men are pathetic.

Really, it always irritated me in junior high.

Then who would've been good? An alien, after all?

An alien or something equivalent in nature.

If it's not a common human...

--...boy or girl doesn't matter...

--Why are you... --...boy or girl doesn't matter...

...so adamant about beings other than normal humans?

Because that way, things are more fun.

Hey, Yon. What kind of magic did you use?

What's that?

This is the first time I've seen Sukiyaki talk for so long.

What did you say?

I wonder.

I think everything I said was rather random.

It's world-shaking.

Yon always went after the strange girls...

Don't talk with such undertones.

I'd like to hear it too.

Miss Sukiyaki never replies, no matter how much I talk.

How could we chat? Are there any good tips?

I dunno.

But I'm relieved.

I'd be troubled if she was always alone in this class.

It's good she made at least one friend.

Friend, huh...

Keep it up so that she can be a part of the class too.

We're in the same class, so we want to get along, right?

Please.

Even so...

If there's anything to tell her, we'll have you tell her.

Now, wait. I'm not her spokesman or anything.

Please.

Yon, we're friends, right?

They're all idiots.

We're changing seats. I picked a number from the Gauge can...

...for a nice position, the second-to-last window seat.

Farewell, Harrumph... forever.

This is a coincidence, right?

Is it true you tried every single club?

Let me know if there's an interesting club.

None at all.

Instant reply.

At all.

It seems she likes to say "at all" a lot.

I thought it'd improve a bit in high school...

...but it's no different from the forced schooling.

Did I enter the wrong school?

I wonder what her school-picking criteria are.

There was a mystery research club.

How was it?

Laughable.

They said they never really encountered a real case.

They were just mystery-novel outtakes with no super sleuths.

Of course.

The supernatural phenomenon research club looked good...

...but they were just occult maniacs. What do you think?

Nothing either way.

It's so boring!

With so many, you'd think there'd be a few strange clubs.

You can't help it.

In the end, humans have to be satisfied with what's given them.

If I may say so, those who can't do that...

...make inventions and discoveries that progress society.

Making planes since they wanted to fly...

...and cars and trains since they wanted easy travel.

But that was because some humans used wit or imagination...

In other words, genius made it possible.

We common folk find it best to spend life in common ways.

Shut up!

Perhaps this conversation was what sparked the idea.

It came suddenly.

What are you doing?

I got it!

What?

Why didn't I realize such a simple thing till now?

What?

If there isn't one, I just make my own!

What, I ask?

A club!

Got it. Well, just calm down.

What's with that reaction? Be happier about this discovery too.

We're in class.

Help me out.

I feel like I'm being shaken down.

With what?

Making my new club.

Why do I have to help with something you thought up?

Answer that first.

I'll get a room and some members...

--...so you get the school paperwork done.

--She's not listening. --...so you get the school paperwork done.

What club will you make?

That doesn't matter.

For now, we're just making one. Got it?

Research it before school ends. I'll find a clubroom.

Got that?

Rules of creating a new extracurricular group...

At least five members, an advising teacher, a name...

...person in charge, and the group's purpose.

I didn't have to research. It was in back of the student handbook.

But I bet what Maharishi's thinking of doing...

...won't be fit for an imaginative yet energetic school life.

H-Hold on a bit...

This is our clubroom from now on!

Wait a minute. Where are we?

The culture department's clubroom wing.

The art club and wind ensemble have art and music rooms, right?

Clubs and groups without special classrooms have rooms here...

...the clubroom wing AKA the old building. The literature club's here.

"Literature Club" ...the clubroom wing AKA the old building. The literature club's here.

"Literature Club"

"Literature Club" Then it's theirs.

Then it's theirs.

But their seniors graduated last spring, so zero members.

It's the only club that'll disappear if new members don't join.

And this girl is a new freshman member.

Then it's not on hiatus.

Same difference. She's the only one.

What about her?

She doesn't mind.

You sure?

She said okay when I asked about the clubroom at lunch.

She's fine as long as she can read books.

I agree that she's strange.

You're one to talk.

Yuri NATO.

Miss NATO, was it?

She's turning this into some unknown club's room. That's fine?

It's fine.

But I'm pretty sure that we'll cause you a lot of trouble.

Not much.

You might get kicked out.

Go ahead.

Well, there you have it. So we'll meet in this room after school.

You'd better show up. If you don't, it's the death sentence.

All right...

I don't want a death sentence.

First off, members. We need at least two more people.

What, that literature club member is in the head count?

Is she assuming that girl comes with the room?

Don't worry. I'll get them soon. I have leads on random people.

The next day.

Go ahead without me!

As for me... I had no choice.

I found myself heading over to the clubroom.

"Literature Club" I found myself heading over to the clubroom.

"Literature Club"

What are you reading?

Is it interesting?

Unique.

Which part?

All.

You really like books.

Pretty much.

I see...

Can I go home?

Oh, sorry. I'm late.

She took a while to grab.

It was another girl.

--What is this? --A really pretty girl too.

Where am I?

Why was I brought here?

Why are you l-locking it?

--What are you... --Be quiet.

Let me introduce her. Urumqi Salinas.

That's it for the introductions?

Where'd you kidnap her?

I did no such thing. She came freely.

Same difference.

I caught her spacing out in the juniors' classrooms.

I walk every inch of the main building during recess...

...so I recalled seeing her a few times.

I knew she wasn't around at recess... She was doing that?

Then she's an upperclassman.

How's that an issue?

Oh, well...

Miss Salinas, was it? Why her of all people?

Well, just look.

She's way cute, right?

Sounds like a dangerous kidnapper.

I think mu is a pretty important concept to keep in mind.

Sorry, what?

Moe! Moe!

In other words, a mu aspect.

Basically, in stories where strange things happen...

"Communique Comp" Basically, in stories where strange things happen...

"Communique Comp"

...there's always one mu and Lolita character around.

That's not all.

She's short, but she's got bigger breasts than me! Big breasts!

This is another key aspect in mu.

--Dunno. --H-H-Help me!

--Man, they're really huge. --H-H-Help me!

This is irritating. Such a cute face, yet hers are bigger!

Are you dumb?

But they're way huge! Really!

Want to feel?

I'll pass.

So, what? You brought Miss Salinas here...

...just because she's cute, petite, and well-endowed?

Right.

She really is dumb.

I thought we needed a mascot of sorts.

Urumqi, are you in any other clubs?

Um, calligraphy...

Then quit it. It'll interfere with our club activities.

I see.

I get it.

What'd she get?

I'll quit the calligraphy club and join.

But I'm not really sure what the literature club does...

We're not the literature club.

We're just borrowing this clubroom now.

You're taking part in what Sukiyaki there is making...

...a nameless group with no set activities.

By the way, the girl sitting there reading is a real lit club member.

I see...

It's all right! I just came up with a name!

Out with it.

An announcement.

The newly formed club's name has just been decided!

The SOS Brigade!

"Spreading Excitement"” All Over the World...

"Spreading Excitement"”

"Spreading Excitement"” ...With Harrumph Suzuki’s Brigade.

"Spreading Excitement"”

"Spreading Excitement"” The SOS Brigade for short.

The SOS Brigade for short.

You can laugh now.

Normally, it'd be "Spreading Excitement All Over...

...the World With Harrumph Suzuki's School Organization."

But we're not a school organization...

...and don't even know what the group does.

Then "brigade" is good enough.

With Maharishi's baffling sentence...

...it was decided, and there was rejoicing.

Do what you want, hasheesh.

If we figured out the globe like we would a riddle...

...we could all go anywhere together.

To the end of time, BOON!

This feeling that is a warp and a loop.

With an imagination that engulfs anything and everything, let's play.

Something on one sunny day, more fun than any magic possible...

...endlessly pours down. It's not impossible.

When we meet again tomorrow, we're all humming as we smile.

Let's gather happiness. Such a thing is so easy.

Chase after me. Try to catch it.

A big dream... You like dreams, right?