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All language subtitles for Welcome Home Roscoe Jenkins 2008 Full movie online MyFlixer

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:01:00,625 --> 00:01:03,917 [ Woman ] Lights, camera, access. 2 00:01:05,417 --> 00:01:09,375 [ Woman #2 ] Yes, it's true. The master of midday TV goes prime time. 3 00:01:09,375 --> 00:01:13,917 Talk show host Dr. R.J. Stevens has popped the question to Bianca Kittles, 4 00:01:13,917 --> 00:01:15,500 recent winner of Survivor: Kiribati. 5 00:01:15,500 --> 00:01:19,625 - What's good, family? - The doctor's show, with his irreverent guests-- 6 00:01:19,625 --> 00:01:21,750 I've been banging your sister. 7 00:01:21,750 --> 00:01:24,208 [ Screaming ] party-like atmosphere... 8 00:01:24,208 --> 00:01:26,500 and his "Team of Me" philosophy-- 9 00:01:26,500 --> 00:01:28,834 - The team of who? - [ All ] Me! 10 00:01:28,834 --> 00:01:30,500 Rely on yourself. 11 00:01:30,500 --> 00:01:33,166 has gotten a significant ratings boost... 12 00:01:33,166 --> 00:01:35,500 since news of his impending nuptials became public. 13 00:01:35,500 --> 00:01:39,375 This is, no doubt, welcome news to the ultracompetitive, glammed-out Bianca. 14 00:01:39,375 --> 00:01:42,333 The TV reality star used every asset she possessed... 15 00:01:42,333 --> 00:01:45,083 to outwit, outplay and outlast the competition... 16 00:01:45,083 --> 00:01:47,166 on her quest for the million bucks. 17 00:01:47,166 --> 00:01:49,542 It's a Q-Ratings bonanza, 18 00:01:49,542 --> 00:01:52,291 as these two couldn't be more perfectly matched. 19 00:01:52,291 --> 00:01:54,834 Life is good for the good doctor. 20 00:01:54,834 --> 00:01:58,917 Wow. That was fabulous. Access. 21 00:01:58,917 --> 00:02:01,041 Honey, I'm so proud of you. Thank you. 22 00:02:01,041 --> 00:02:04,333 You're such a star. Isn't he a star? [ Cheering ] 23 00:02:04,333 --> 00:02:09,583 He is a superstar. Now that is how you announce your engagement. 24 00:02:10,875 --> 00:02:14,750 That was genius. You're the talk of the town. [ Woman ] Hey, R.J. 25 00:02:14,750 --> 00:02:16,834 Could you imagine this five years ago, bro? 26 00:02:16,834 --> 00:02:19,041 [ Scoffs ] With a girl like that? Hell, no. 27 00:02:19,041 --> 00:02:22,792 Hit show, big mansion on the block. Now I'm international. 28 00:02:22,792 --> 00:02:25,041 You look great, by the way. Shoot, man. 29 00:02:25,041 --> 00:02:27,750 That's all this tofu Bianca got me eatin'. 30 00:02:27,750 --> 00:02:31,083 Besides the hunger pains, bein' a vegan is the shit. 31 00:02:31,959 --> 00:02:33,667 Cheers. [ Bianca ] Honey. 32 00:02:33,667 --> 00:02:35,041 Telephone. 33 00:02:35,041 --> 00:02:38,417 Mmm. Huh? Huh? Get goin'. 34 00:02:38,417 --> 00:02:40,959 [ Bianca ] That sounds wonderful. 35 00:02:40,959 --> 00:02:44,583 I can't wait. Great. 36 00:02:44,583 --> 00:02:47,083 Oh. Well, it's nice speaking to you. 37 00:02:47,083 --> 00:02:50,208 Okay, hold on. It's your mom. 38 00:02:50,208 --> 00:02:53,125 Hurry up. Talk. We still have guests. Hi. 39 00:02:53,125 --> 00:02:56,166 You made it. Oh, my God. You look amazing. 40 00:02:56,166 --> 00:02:58,166 Hey, Mama. 41 00:02:58,166 --> 00:03:01,417 Well, hello, stranger. 42 00:03:01,417 --> 00:03:04,750 We're just beginnin' to think you just forgot all about us. 43 00:03:04,750 --> 00:03:08,542 No, Mama. I can't forget my number one girl. 44 00:03:08,542 --> 00:03:11,917 [ Chuckles ] And I didn't forget your anniversary either. 45 00:03:11,917 --> 00:03:15,875 I sent y'all a 50-inch plasma TV. 46 00:03:15,875 --> 00:03:17,875 One inch for every year. 47 00:03:17,875 --> 00:03:19,792 Aw. That's sweet, baby. 48 00:03:19,792 --> 00:03:22,667 But we'd much rather meet "Blanca." 49 00:03:22,667 --> 00:03:27,458 She sounds so nice. [ Chuckles ] Bianca, Mama. Not Blanca. 50 00:03:27,458 --> 00:03:31,542 Oh, I'm sorry. I thought it was Blanca. 51 00:03:31,542 --> 00:03:34,208 Well, baby, you know it's our 50th anniversary. 52 00:03:34,208 --> 00:03:38,208 Mama, um, I don't think we're gonna be able to make it. 53 00:03:38,208 --> 00:03:39,708 [ Gasps ] Uh, Jamaal-- 54 00:03:39,708 --> 00:03:42,166 you know, he's got this big, uh, soccer game. 55 00:03:42,166 --> 00:03:44,333 The boy loves himself some soccer, Mama. 56 00:03:44,333 --> 00:03:47,375 I know. He talks to Papa all the time. 57 00:03:47,375 --> 00:03:51,125 - Jamaal and Daddy been talkin'? - Mm-hmm. And writin' letters. 58 00:03:51,125 --> 00:03:55,125 Lord! You know, we haven't seen that child since he was a baby. 59 00:03:55,125 --> 00:03:57,625 You've just got to come. Everybody's comin'. 60 00:03:57,625 --> 00:04:00,625 We got Ellie and Cleavon. 61 00:04:00,625 --> 00:04:03,250 - Clyde and Lucinda and-- - Lucinda? 62 00:04:03,250 --> 00:04:05,500 Oh, yeah. Lucinda and Clyde? 63 00:04:05,500 --> 00:04:07,667 Mm-hmm. They're comin' together? 64 00:04:07,667 --> 00:04:09,792 I forgot to tell you. But I-- I thought-- 65 00:04:09,792 --> 00:04:14,208 [ Man ] That's a lot of questions, boy. Hey, Daddy. 66 00:04:14,208 --> 00:04:18,166 Especially from someone who's shown very little interest in his family. 67 00:04:18,166 --> 00:04:20,834 Yes, sir, but-- If you can find the time... 68 00:04:20,834 --> 00:04:23,583 to explore the mind of a stripper... 69 00:04:23,583 --> 00:04:26,959 or sisters gone wild with your so-called family, 70 00:04:26,959 --> 00:04:30,792 then you can find the time to spend with your actual family. 71 00:04:30,792 --> 00:04:33,458 So you've been watchin'. Boy, 72 00:04:33,458 --> 00:04:35,708 don't disappoint your mother. 73 00:04:52,250 --> 00:04:54,291 [ Sighs ] 74 00:04:54,291 --> 00:04:57,458 [ Whistle Blows ] [ All Shouting ] 75 00:04:57,458 --> 00:05:00,208 [ R.J. ] Go, Jamaal! There you go. There you go. 76 00:05:00,208 --> 00:05:03,208 All right. Move. Push it. 77 00:05:03,208 --> 00:05:05,375 Right there! 78 00:05:05,375 --> 00:05:07,250 Way to go, Jamaal. 79 00:05:07,250 --> 00:05:10,542 Stay with it, Jamaal. 80 00:05:10,542 --> 00:05:13,500 Whoo-hoo. [ Chuckles ] 81 00:05:15,542 --> 00:05:18,208 - [ Cheering ] - [ Whistle Blows ] 82 00:05:18,208 --> 00:05:21,750 [ All Cheering ] All right. Take care. Tell Jamaal I said bye. 83 00:05:21,750 --> 00:05:23,750 Jamaal, way to go. 84 00:05:23,750 --> 00:05:26,333 Way to go. That's how you do that. Good going, guys! Yeah! 85 00:05:26,333 --> 00:05:29,250 Whoo! That's my boy. 86 00:05:29,250 --> 00:05:31,667 [ Chuckles ] That's my boy. 87 00:05:31,667 --> 00:05:35,917 That's a lot of runnin'... for one goal. 88 00:05:35,917 --> 00:05:38,708 But hey, at least you hit it. [ Chuckles ] 89 00:05:38,708 --> 00:05:42,917 Dad, you should come more often. Hey. I'm here. 90 00:05:42,917 --> 00:05:46,125 Dad, why don't you want to go to Dry Springs? 91 00:05:46,125 --> 00:05:48,834 [ Groans ] Come on. 92 00:05:48,834 --> 00:05:52,750 - Not you too. - Papa Jenkins says Dry Springs is awesome. 93 00:05:52,750 --> 00:05:55,917 He said all my cousins will be there and I'd have a lot of fun. 94 00:05:55,917 --> 00:05:58,667 Oh, really? What else do y'all talk about? 95 00:05:58,667 --> 00:06:03,750 I don't know. School, my friends, soccer, global warming. 96 00:06:03,750 --> 00:06:05,333 Global warming? 97 00:06:05,333 --> 00:06:07,792 We talk about a lot of stuff. 98 00:06:07,792 --> 00:06:09,875 He's really cool. 99 00:06:09,875 --> 00:06:12,625 Can't we please go? 100 00:06:13,959 --> 00:06:16,291 I'll think about it, Jamaal. 101 00:06:17,792 --> 00:06:21,917 Oh. Talk it over with the boss first. 102 00:06:22,834 --> 00:06:26,333 Boss? [ Chuckles ] 103 00:06:27,417 --> 00:06:31,417 Son, men run things in a relationship. 104 00:06:31,417 --> 00:06:33,458 And between us men, 105 00:06:33,458 --> 00:06:37,458 never let a woman tell you what to do and how to do it. 106 00:06:38,375 --> 00:06:40,792 Your dad's in complete control. 107 00:06:40,792 --> 00:06:43,041 [ R.J. Screaming ] [ Bianca ] Who's in control? 108 00:06:43,041 --> 00:06:45,083 [ Screaming ] Tell me. Who's in control? 109 00:06:45,083 --> 00:06:48,000 - I don't know. - Take me home. You can do it. 110 00:06:48,000 --> 00:06:49,959 Oh-- Come on. 111 00:06:49,959 --> 00:06:51,500 Take me! Honey! 112 00:06:51,500 --> 00:06:53,458 Come on, love! Mama! 113 00:06:53,458 --> 00:06:55,208 - [ Deep Voice ] Yes! - Oh, shit. 114 00:06:55,208 --> 00:06:57,125 - Push it. - What the hell are-- 115 00:06:57,125 --> 00:06:59,375 - Yes! - Oh! 116 00:06:59,375 --> 00:07:02,792 Shah-mah-lahk-ahmmmm, mah-kah-lah-kah, 117 00:07:02,792 --> 00:07:06,208 chuck-ching-chung-pow! 118 00:07:06,208 --> 00:07:08,500 Oh. Speaking in tongues. 119 00:07:08,500 --> 00:07:10,667 That's a first. 120 00:07:10,667 --> 00:07:12,750 O. 121 00:07:12,750 --> 00:07:15,917 I'm so proud of you. [ Kisses ] 122 00:07:15,917 --> 00:07:19,041 I want to look hot for your family. 123 00:07:20,083 --> 00:07:23,500 So now, time for my seven miles. 124 00:07:24,333 --> 00:07:27,542 [ Treadmill Beeps, Whirs ] 125 00:07:27,542 --> 00:07:30,291 Can you untie me first? 126 00:07:32,125 --> 00:07:34,959 Baby. 127 00:07:34,959 --> 00:07:38,041 Babe. Babe. 128 00:07:41,333 --> 00:07:44,000 [ Sighs ] It's all done. I booked the tickets. 129 00:07:44,000 --> 00:07:47,542 Honey, I'm hearing a tinge of doubt in your voice. 130 00:07:47,542 --> 00:07:49,875 Oh, I'm a-- I'm cool. 131 00:07:49,875 --> 00:07:53,375 You know, it's-- it'll be four days, then we get back to our lives. 132 00:07:53,375 --> 00:07:55,291 Exactly. 133 00:07:55,291 --> 00:07:58,542 This will solidify our union to the world. 134 00:07:58,542 --> 00:08:02,750 We'll tape your parents' banquet, you make a heartfelt speech... 135 00:08:02,750 --> 00:08:05,417 and the ratings-- Oh, my God. 136 00:08:05,417 --> 00:08:08,542 [ Exhales Deeply ] Yeah. 137 00:08:08,542 --> 00:08:10,458 "Country boy done good... 138 00:08:10,458 --> 00:08:13,625 returns home with his Survivor queen." 139 00:08:13,625 --> 00:08:16,417 [ Chuckles ] Hey. My-- My audience'll dig that. 140 00:08:16,417 --> 00:08:20,667 See? That's why I love you. 141 00:08:20,667 --> 00:08:23,834 Baby, I've dated all kinds of men. 142 00:08:23,834 --> 00:08:26,417 Athletes, C.E.O.'s, 143 00:08:26,417 --> 00:08:30,041 princes, bad boys, 144 00:08:30,041 --> 00:08:34,082 attorneys, mob bosses-- No. No. I g-- I get it. I get that. 145 00:08:34,082 --> 00:08:36,582 But... 146 00:08:36,582 --> 00:08:40,875 I've never connected with any of them the way that I do with you. 147 00:08:40,875 --> 00:08:44,041 R.J. Stevens. 148 00:08:44,041 --> 00:08:46,125 "Team of Me." 149 00:08:46,125 --> 00:08:47,583 [ Chuckles ] 150 00:08:47,583 --> 00:08:49,750 Ooh. Your very words helped me win Survivor, 151 00:08:49,750 --> 00:08:53,250 and they brought me right to you. 152 00:08:53,250 --> 00:08:55,500 They did, didn't they? Uh-huh. 153 00:08:55,500 --> 00:08:58,208 [ Chuckles ] See? We connect. 154 00:08:58,208 --> 00:09:00,417 Yes. We're winners. 155 00:09:00,417 --> 00:09:04,458 Mm-hmm. And you-- you're the man. 156 00:09:04,458 --> 00:09:06,500 I am the man. Mm-hmm. Say it louder. 157 00:09:06,500 --> 00:09:08,542 I'm the man. Say it louder. 158 00:09:08,542 --> 00:09:10,667 I'm the man! Yeah! 159 00:09:10,667 --> 00:09:13,000 ♪ [ Hip-hop ] 160 00:09:16,291 --> 00:09:19,083 ♪ Ain't nobody dope as me ♪ 161 00:09:19,083 --> 00:09:22,000 ♪ I'm dressed so fresh so clean ♪ ♪ So fresh, so clean, clean ♪ 162 00:09:22,000 --> 00:09:26,208 ♪ Don't you think I'm so sexy I'm dressed so fresh so clean ♪ 163 00:09:26,208 --> 00:09:28,125 ♪ So fresh and so clean, clean ♪ 164 00:09:28,125 --> 00:09:31,750 ♪ Ain't nobody dope as me I'm dressed so fresh so clean ♪ 165 00:09:31,750 --> 00:09:35,208 ♪ So fresh and so clean ♪ Honey, don't ruin your outfit. 166 00:09:35,208 --> 00:09:37,834 Baby, men don't wear outfits. 167 00:09:41,792 --> 00:09:44,458 What do you have in these bags anyway? 168 00:09:44,458 --> 00:09:49,834 You went 39 days on a desert island with-- with a toothpick and a thong. 169 00:09:49,834 --> 00:09:51,959 I need options. 170 00:09:51,959 --> 00:09:54,834 Damn the options. I need room. [ Beeping ] 171 00:09:57,500 --> 00:10:00,000 - I'd be happy to check that for you. - Hell, no. 172 00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:01,834 Um-- 173 00:10:01,834 --> 00:10:04,583 I had some bad experiences. 174 00:10:04,583 --> 00:10:08,625 I'll just... slip it in the captain's closet. 175 00:10:09,667 --> 00:10:12,458 It's the safest place it could be. 176 00:10:29,625 --> 00:10:32,333 Oh. 177 00:10:32,333 --> 00:10:35,291 Let's get this party started. Uh, uh, uh. 178 00:10:35,291 --> 00:10:37,291 I got you beet juice. 179 00:10:37,291 --> 00:10:40,166 Come on, baby. I want to live a little. Precisely. 180 00:10:40,166 --> 00:10:42,875 It's an excellent source of antioxidants. Your drink, sir. 181 00:10:42,875 --> 00:10:45,708 Drink up. Enjoy. 182 00:10:45,708 --> 00:10:47,875 [ Engines Whirring ] [ Intercom Beeps ] 183 00:10:47,875 --> 00:10:50,708 - [ Woman ] Once we have reached a comfortable-- - Hey, Dad. 184 00:10:50,708 --> 00:10:53,834 Yeah, Son? This is gonna be great. 185 00:10:53,834 --> 00:10:56,708 Thanks. Anything for you, my man. 186 00:10:58,208 --> 00:11:00,542 Fi-- [ Gasps ] 187 00:11:00,542 --> 00:11:03,667 - [ Dog Whimpers ] - [ Woman ] And now we ask you to please... 188 00:11:03,667 --> 00:11:08,125 relax, sit back and enjoy the flight. 189 00:11:09,917 --> 00:11:12,667 Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Georgia. 190 00:11:12,667 --> 00:11:14,917 How does his bag get lost in a captain's closet? 191 00:11:14,917 --> 00:11:17,000 - Explain that to me. - Yes, ma'am. 192 00:11:17,000 --> 00:11:19,583 Where's your father? He won't come out of the bathroom. 193 00:11:19,583 --> 00:11:22,417 [ Woman On P.A. ] The white zone is for immediate loading and unloading only. 194 00:11:22,417 --> 00:11:24,792 Honey, how do the pants fit? 195 00:11:24,792 --> 00:11:29,792 Flight 514 from Atlanta, your luggage will be at Carousel 2. 196 00:11:36,125 --> 00:11:39,959 [ Chuckles, Clears Throat] 197 00:11:46,417 --> 00:11:48,917 You mean to tell me this is the only pair of pants... 198 00:11:48,917 --> 00:11:51,125 you could find in this country-ass airport? 199 00:11:51,125 --> 00:11:55,125 I like it. Colors look fabulous on you. 200 00:11:56,625 --> 00:11:59,959 Babe, I look like a clown. 201 00:11:59,959 --> 00:12:02,750 Look-- Look at how tight these are. Look. 202 00:12:04,417 --> 00:12:06,750 Ooh. I see that, tiger. [ Playful Growl ] 203 00:12:06,750 --> 00:12:10,583 Come. Let's get the car. [ Clicks Tongue ] 204 00:12:13,166 --> 00:12:14,959 [ Chuckles ] 205 00:12:14,959 --> 00:12:17,500 [ Woman On P.A. ] Ladies and gentlemen, for your own safety and protection, 206 00:12:17,500 --> 00:12:21,125 please do not leave your bags unattended. 207 00:12:21,125 --> 00:12:24,792 Yeah. Huh. 208 00:12:26,625 --> 00:12:29,125 [ Jamaal ] Wow. The whole weekend is planned. 209 00:12:29,125 --> 00:12:32,625 There's a barbecue today, a softball game tomorrow, 210 00:12:32,625 --> 00:12:35,000 a fish fry on Saturday. 211 00:12:35,000 --> 00:12:37,333 Oh, look! An obstacle course race! 212 00:12:37,333 --> 00:12:39,959 And the anniversary banquet's Sunday night. 213 00:12:39,959 --> 00:12:41,792 Cool! 214 00:12:41,792 --> 00:12:45,458 [ Chuckles ] Oh! Whoo-hoo, hoo, ho! 215 00:12:45,458 --> 00:12:47,333 Nice ears, Dad! 216 00:12:47,333 --> 00:12:50,792 [ Laughing ] Oh, man. Nice picture, Dad. 217 00:12:50,792 --> 00:12:53,750 [ Laughing ] Oh, man. 218 00:12:53,750 --> 00:12:57,333 ♪ And you're all alone ♪ 219 00:12:57,333 --> 00:12:59,333 ♪ In the dark ♪ 220 00:12:59,333 --> 00:13:01,917 ♪ [ Fades ] 221 00:13:01,917 --> 00:13:04,542 [ Horn Honks ] [ Man ] Hey, now. 222 00:13:04,542 --> 00:13:07,208 How terribly quaint. 223 00:13:07,208 --> 00:13:09,625 As if time stood still. Hmm. 224 00:13:09,625 --> 00:13:12,458 It has. I told you don't nothin' ever happen around here. 225 00:13:12,458 --> 00:13:15,542 ♪ [ Car Stereo: Loud Hip-hop] 226 00:13:15,542 --> 00:13:18,625 ♪ [ Stereo: Man Rapping ] That shit was tight, right? 227 00:13:18,625 --> 00:13:20,583 Whoo! Whoo! 228 00:13:20,583 --> 00:13:22,583 Oh, damn. 229 00:13:22,583 --> 00:13:27,458 Oh, my God, baby. You-- You get me so freakin' hot. 230 00:13:27,458 --> 00:13:31,875 - [ Bianca ] Do you know them? - I don't know her, but that's my cousin Reggie. 231 00:13:31,875 --> 00:13:33,875 You got your jewelry? You got your purse? 232 00:13:33,875 --> 00:13:35,625 All right. 'Cause the boy could con Jesus. 233 00:13:35,625 --> 00:13:39,125 ♪ [ Continues ] Oh, no. Oh, no. That's him. 234 00:13:39,125 --> 00:13:41,208 Oh, that's him. Ooh! 235 00:13:41,208 --> 00:13:43,250 Here he come. Here he come. 236 00:13:43,250 --> 00:13:47,500 My nigga Roscoe Steven Jenkins. Hollywood did came to town. 237 00:13:47,500 --> 00:13:50,333 - [ Laughs ] What's up? - What's up, dog? Oh! 238 00:13:50,333 --> 00:13:53,000 What up, Coz? What up, Coz? [ Shouting, Laughing ] 239 00:13:53,000 --> 00:13:55,083 How you doin'? How you doin'? [ Laughing ] 240 00:13:55,083 --> 00:13:57,625 Come on, man. Give it up. Man, what's happening? 241 00:13:57,625 --> 00:14:02,041 Oh, man. Look at what you-- Uh, look. You got them picnic tablecloth pants on. 242 00:14:02,041 --> 00:14:04,708 "Hey, Boo Boo. Let me get another picnic basket." 243 00:14:04,708 --> 00:14:08,166 Uh-- I guess OutKast about to name their third member: 244 00:14:08,166 --> 00:14:10,375 Little Roscoe 1000. 245 00:14:10,375 --> 00:14:13,250 Yeah, well, don't be mad 'cause you ain't up on the style. 246 00:14:13,250 --> 00:14:16,000 Ain't that right, baby? "Roscoe"? 247 00:14:16,000 --> 00:14:19,917 - Why do you call him Roscoe? - That's his government name. 248 00:14:20,917 --> 00:14:24,583 - Mm-hmm. - Oh, not into full disclosure. I see. 249 00:14:24,583 --> 00:14:26,583 Okay. Welcome to the family. 250 00:14:26,583 --> 00:14:29,458 - Oh. Thank you. - Lookee here. Lookee here. 251 00:14:29,458 --> 00:14:33,125 First it was Survivor, now it's America's Next Top Model. 252 00:14:33,125 --> 00:14:35,375 Oh, stop it. Really? 253 00:14:35,375 --> 00:14:37,458 Oh, hell, yeah, really. 254 00:14:37,458 --> 00:14:41,500 Oh, my God. I would drink your dishwater, bathwater-- all types of waters. 255 00:14:41,500 --> 00:14:45,208 I'll drink all your waters. Boy, you do your thing. Hey, hey. Get-- Get off. 256 00:14:45,208 --> 00:14:47,291 Hey. Stop it. Ow. Get off me. 257 00:14:47,291 --> 00:14:50,208 Do your thing! Do your thing! Man, you do your thing. Get off me. 258 00:14:50,208 --> 00:14:52,625 Why you keep checkin' my pockets, Reggie? Do your thing. 259 00:14:52,625 --> 00:14:55,125 You need to get me out to L.A. Would you look here? Hi. 260 00:14:55,125 --> 00:14:57,542 - Hi. - I'm Amy. 261 00:14:57,542 --> 00:15:00,375 Yeah. Me and Amy friends, man. You know what I'm sayin'? 262 00:15:00,375 --> 00:15:04,500 She been a real inspiration to me puttin' my new hip-hop album out. You know what I'm sayin'? 263 00:15:04,500 --> 00:15:06,708 And my dad's company is financing it. 264 00:15:06,708 --> 00:15:09,542 It's Pimp Nasty Records. Word. 265 00:15:09,542 --> 00:15:11,834 Pimp Nasty? [ Laughs ] 266 00:15:11,834 --> 00:15:13,959 So everything-- Hey, boy. What the-- 267 00:15:13,959 --> 00:15:15,291 Ah! What you doin'? 268 00:15:15,291 --> 00:15:16,667 Get back. Yah! Get back. 269 00:15:16,667 --> 00:15:19,000 Water rat. That's a water rat right there. 270 00:15:19,000 --> 00:15:21,500 [ Shouts ] Get back. Get back. [ Shouts ] 271 00:15:21,500 --> 00:15:23,083 It's okay, Fifi. 272 00:15:23,083 --> 00:15:25,959 - [ R.J. ] Reggie, man. She's a dog, man. - It's Fiona. 273 00:15:25,959 --> 00:15:28,500 Yo quiero Taco Bell. I didn't know what it was, man. 274 00:15:28,500 --> 00:15:33,125 I thought it was a little fur coat with some feet or somethin' when it walked over here, boy. 275 00:15:33,125 --> 00:15:37,291 [ Chuckling ] Man, Mama J. sent us down here to get some ice. 276 00:15:37,291 --> 00:15:39,500 - And? - We're probably gonna need about 300. 277 00:15:39,500 --> 00:15:41,250 $300? Yeah. 278 00:15:41,250 --> 00:15:42,959 - For some ice? - For some ice. 279 00:15:42,959 --> 00:15:44,834 You must think I'm a damn fool. 280 00:15:44,834 --> 00:15:46,583 No, I know you ain't no damn fool. 281 00:15:46,583 --> 00:15:51,375 You're standin' there with that beautiful lady right there. Look like you a lucky fool. 282 00:15:51,375 --> 00:15:53,625 [ Chuckles ] 283 00:15:54,708 --> 00:15:57,333 What? It's just $300, baby. Go on. 284 00:15:57,333 --> 00:15:59,834 You're not cheap, baby. Yes, he is. 285 00:15:59,834 --> 00:16:02,375 You don't know him like we-- He's tight. Yeah, he is. 286 00:16:02,375 --> 00:16:04,625 It's only 300. That's it. 300. 287 00:16:04,625 --> 00:16:08,625 For your family. Please? 288 00:16:08,625 --> 00:16:10,875 Go on, baby. 289 00:16:12,542 --> 00:16:14,375 For the family. Mm-hmm. 290 00:16:14,375 --> 00:16:17,667 ♪ [ Hip-hop ] 291 00:16:17,667 --> 00:16:21,583 ♪ Say what say-ay-ay-ay-ay ♪ 292 00:16:21,583 --> 00:16:24,375 ♪ Do you want it on your collard greens ♪ 293 00:16:24,375 --> 00:16:27,291 ♪ Do you want it on your candy sweets ♪ All right. Great to see you. 294 00:16:27,291 --> 00:16:29,583 Papa? Huh? 295 00:16:29,583 --> 00:16:32,875 They made it! Told you. 296 00:16:32,875 --> 00:16:35,041 Well, come on. 297 00:16:36,875 --> 00:16:38,875 Come on, baby. 298 00:16:38,875 --> 00:16:41,125 [ Mama Jenkins Laughing ] 299 00:16:41,125 --> 00:16:43,250 Oh, my baby's home! 300 00:16:43,250 --> 00:16:46,458 Hey, Mama. How you doin'? 301 00:16:46,458 --> 00:16:48,917 Well, well. Look who showed up-- 302 00:16:48,917 --> 00:16:53,166 my grandson's father, Dr. R.J. Stevens. 303 00:16:53,166 --> 00:16:55,000 Been a long time, Dr. Stevens. 304 00:16:55,000 --> 00:16:58,750 Dad, that's just a stage name. Yeah. I know. 305 00:16:58,750 --> 00:17:02,542 - Jamaal, welcome back. - Thanks, Papa Jenkins. 306 00:17:02,542 --> 00:17:05,165 Oh, and this is Blanca. 307 00:17:05,165 --> 00:17:07,208 Pretty girl, Roscoe. 308 00:17:07,208 --> 00:17:10,916 You must got some Indian in you, all that long, pretty hair. 309 00:17:10,916 --> 00:17:13,250 Roscoe, you been eatin'? 310 00:17:13,250 --> 00:17:17,250 You all skin and bone. Don't look like I never nourished you. 311 00:17:17,250 --> 00:17:19,666 I know. Doesn't he look fabulous? 312 00:17:19,666 --> 00:17:21,875 [ Man ] Yeah. He looks fabulous all right. 313 00:17:21,875 --> 00:17:25,040 Downright metrosexual with them young-ass pants on. 314 00:17:25,040 --> 00:17:28,708 Oh, no. You should have seen his ensemble before his little accident. 315 00:17:28,708 --> 00:17:30,458 It was exquisite. 316 00:17:30,458 --> 00:17:33,333 [ Laughs ] Are you kiddin'? Better than this? 317 00:17:34,750 --> 00:17:36,959 What? I didn't say "outfit." 318 00:17:36,959 --> 00:17:39,750 Got ya. Uh-huh. Pounced on you. Get-- Get off. 319 00:17:39,750 --> 00:17:41,792 - Let me see how strong you are. - Otis. 320 00:17:41,792 --> 00:17:44,708 Yeah. [ Laughs ] Just like old times again. 321 00:17:44,708 --> 00:17:45,959 Lord, Otis. 322 00:17:45,959 --> 00:17:47,375 Do it. Get out of it. Mama! 323 00:17:47,375 --> 00:17:49,041 Otis. Otis. Let's see what you got. 324 00:17:49,041 --> 00:17:52,125 Get off me, O. Yeah. Go ahead. Do. I want you to. 325 00:17:52,125 --> 00:17:54,250 Boy, introduce me. That's rude. 326 00:17:54,250 --> 00:17:56,208 I-- 327 00:17:56,208 --> 00:17:59,417 [ Chuckles ] Bianca, 328 00:17:59,417 --> 00:18:03,333 this is my country, neck-bone-eatin' brother, Otis. 329 00:18:03,333 --> 00:18:05,291 The sheriff. 330 00:18:05,291 --> 00:18:07,667 Southern hospitality at your service. 331 00:18:07,667 --> 00:18:09,333 Get up off that. 332 00:18:09,333 --> 00:18:11,834 This here is Ruthie. Hi. 333 00:18:11,834 --> 00:18:14,000 - And that's my baby she carryin'. - Wow, Ruthie. 334 00:18:14,000 --> 00:18:17,166 - You look like you're about to pop. - No, I'm just six months. 335 00:18:17,166 --> 00:18:21,000 But I bet y'all will be loadin' up soon, huh? 336 00:18:21,000 --> 00:18:25,375 Oh, God, no. Nothing's wreckin' this figure. 337 00:18:25,375 --> 00:18:28,500 - Hmm. - At least not right now. 338 00:18:28,500 --> 00:18:30,667 Uh, Jamaal. Uh, say hello. 339 00:18:30,667 --> 00:18:32,542 Are you really the sheriff? 340 00:18:32,542 --> 00:18:35,000 Mm-hmm. To serve and protect. 341 00:18:35,000 --> 00:18:37,000 And occasionally whup ass. 342 00:18:37,000 --> 00:18:40,083 Meet your cousins. Junior. Callie. 343 00:18:40,083 --> 00:18:43,375 Ah, damn! [ Laughing ] 344 00:18:43,375 --> 00:18:47,208 What they on? All steroids and no carbs? 345 00:18:47,208 --> 00:18:49,708 Them some thick-ass kids! 346 00:18:49,708 --> 00:18:53,083 - No, I'm serious. Mama, them is thick-ass. - Oh, no. 347 00:18:53,083 --> 00:18:55,333 Like, to be 12-- Them some thick-ass-- 348 00:18:57,542 --> 00:18:59,750 Respect. Respect. 349 00:19:01,208 --> 00:19:03,959 This here is your Cousin Jamaal. 350 00:19:03,959 --> 00:19:06,250 Get him a bat, and get him some battin' practice. 351 00:19:06,250 --> 00:19:08,542 And, Callie, go easy on him. 352 00:19:08,542 --> 00:19:11,125 [ Spits ] You got it, Daddy. 353 00:19:11,125 --> 00:19:13,792 - Huh? - Come on, Son. 354 00:19:13,792 --> 00:19:16,500 You and Granddad will take 'em on together. 355 00:19:17,542 --> 00:19:19,875 You play baseball, don't you? All right-- 356 00:19:19,875 --> 00:19:23,250 Well, Blanca, you want to come in the house and freshen up? 357 00:19:23,250 --> 00:19:26,417 And, Roscoe, you get the bags and just take 'em up to your room. 358 00:19:26,417 --> 00:19:28,708 Okay. And, baby, 359 00:19:28,708 --> 00:19:31,542 please find some clothes that fit. 360 00:19:31,542 --> 00:19:34,166 You got all your business in the street. 361 00:19:34,166 --> 00:19:36,291 Mmm! 362 00:19:38,625 --> 00:19:42,708 Oh, God. It's good to see you, man. 363 00:19:44,208 --> 00:19:47,875 - Little help with the bags, O.? - Man, I ain't no bellhop. 364 00:19:47,875 --> 00:19:50,875 Plus, I ain't had my... steroids today. 365 00:19:50,875 --> 00:19:52,917 [ Laughs ] I got you. 366 00:19:52,917 --> 00:19:57,250 Southern hospitality. Yeah, right. [ Scoffs ] 367 00:19:57,250 --> 00:20:00,500 Oh, and next time you grabbin' on people, wear some deodorant. 368 00:20:00,500 --> 00:20:02,750 Little fake-ass Conan. 369 00:20:05,959 --> 00:20:07,917 Oh, shit! Mama! Mama! 370 00:20:07,917 --> 00:20:10,583 Come here, boy. All-state linebacker. Look at that speed. 371 00:20:10,583 --> 00:20:12,917 Mama! Just leave me alone, O.! Leave me alone! [ Laughing ] 372 00:20:12,917 --> 00:20:16,083 [ Laughing, Chattering ] 373 00:20:18,792 --> 00:20:23,125 [ Mama Jenkins ] Oh, I haven't had so many people in the kitchen since I don't know when. 374 00:20:23,125 --> 00:20:26,333 Oh, oh, oh! You a bad bitch! 375 00:20:26,333 --> 00:20:28,333 Oh! O! 376 00:20:28,333 --> 00:20:33,000 Wait a minute, girl. I'm-- I'm serious. I'm serious. You bad! 377 00:20:33,000 --> 00:20:35,333 You are the baddest bitch Survivor ever had. 378 00:20:35,333 --> 00:20:38,959 Soon to be my sister-in-law, up in my kitchen, girl. I'm honored. 379 00:20:38,959 --> 00:20:41,959 Thank you. All right. Now tell me the truth, okay? 380 00:20:41,959 --> 00:20:44,750 Tell me the truth, 'cause it's you and me. We relatin'. [ Fiona Whimpers ] 381 00:20:44,750 --> 00:20:48,125 Can that hook-head handle you? 'Cause, see, we a lot alike, Binaca. 382 00:20:48,125 --> 00:20:51,834 'Cause we too much woman for one man. You feel me? 383 00:20:51,834 --> 00:20:55,000 Betty, let the child breathe. Now, is the tea ready? 384 00:20:55,000 --> 00:20:58,166 It's right here, Mama. Binaca, you got to try my tea, girl. 385 00:20:58,166 --> 00:21:02,917 I'm telling you right now. This tea right here ain't no joke, Balolo. Best in the county. 386 00:21:02,917 --> 00:21:05,500 - It's Bianca. - That's what I said. 387 00:21:05,500 --> 00:21:09,625 And I'd love to. Cheers. 388 00:21:11,125 --> 00:21:13,000 Aaah! [ Groans ] 389 00:21:13,000 --> 00:21:15,500 God, that's liquid diabetes. You drink that? 390 00:21:15,500 --> 00:21:18,834 - [ Groans ] - No, no. No, no. Wait a minute now, baby. 391 00:21:18,834 --> 00:21:23,000 Don't get all uppity, okay? 'Cause I'm gonna let you know, the brothers down at the pen, 392 00:21:23,000 --> 00:21:26,333 they rave about my sweet tea every Sunday at my Bible readin'. 393 00:21:26,333 --> 00:21:29,625 It ain't the sweet tea. It's them short skirts you be wearin'. 394 00:21:29,625 --> 00:21:33,708 I'm just doin' my part, tryin' to be a good Christian. 395 00:21:33,708 --> 00:21:37,041 And if them brothers need to get a peek at this thong... 396 00:21:37,041 --> 00:21:39,542 to get 'em through them long, lonely nights, 397 00:21:39,542 --> 00:21:43,375 then, Father God and all the heavens up above and the Episcopals, 398 00:21:43,375 --> 00:21:45,542 so be it! 399 00:21:45,542 --> 00:21:47,542 Girl, don't make me sick. You know I'm pregnant. 400 00:21:47,542 --> 00:21:50,542 Thank you. Betty, your thong is an image I do not need. 401 00:21:50,542 --> 00:21:54,041 - Ditto. [ Chuckles ] - [ Imitates Chuckle ] 402 00:21:54,041 --> 00:21:57,083 Wait a minute. Now, see, we're tryin' to bond with you and everything, 403 00:21:57,083 --> 00:21:59,875 welcome you in, but you're gettin' it twisted. 404 00:21:59,875 --> 00:22:03,208 You're gettin' me twisted. But don't get it twisted. 405 00:22:03,208 --> 00:22:05,333 This kitchen here is my domain. 406 00:22:05,333 --> 00:22:07,875 My domain. This ain't no kennel. 407 00:22:07,875 --> 00:22:11,000 And this lab rat got to go. Got to go. 408 00:22:11,000 --> 00:22:14,375 Do you hear me? Am I clear? I bites dogs. [ Growls ] 409 00:22:14,375 --> 00:22:17,083 [ Fiona Whimpers ] Know who I am. Okay? 410 00:22:17,083 --> 00:22:19,250 Now ditto that. 411 00:22:19,250 --> 00:22:22,375 Yeah. Hello? [ Woman ] Yes, sir. 412 00:22:22,375 --> 00:22:24,417 Yeah. Wh-What is your name? Patricia. 413 00:22:24,417 --> 00:22:27,583 Luqueesha? Look here, Luqueesha. Somebody-- 414 00:22:27,583 --> 00:22:31,125 Sir, could you please hold? Yeah, I'll hold. 415 00:22:31,125 --> 00:22:34,625 [ Faint Chattering ] 416 00:22:58,875 --> 00:23:01,458 [ Dog Whimpers ] 417 00:23:01,458 --> 00:23:03,625 [ Panting] 418 00:23:03,625 --> 00:23:05,959 Bucky? 419 00:23:05,959 --> 00:23:08,667 You done messed around and got old, huh, Bucky? 420 00:23:08,667 --> 00:23:11,917 You still alive? [ Snorts ] 421 00:23:13,625 --> 00:23:15,792 Yeah, you used to terrorize me when I was little. 422 00:23:15,792 --> 00:23:18,208 I don't play that now, man. I'm a grown man. 423 00:23:18,208 --> 00:23:21,625 - Look at me when I'm talkin' to you. - [ Murmurs ] 424 00:23:21,625 --> 00:23:23,917 I should kick you in your ass right now, Bucky. Yeah. 425 00:23:23,917 --> 00:23:26,000 When you bit my ankle, I should have-- Hello, Dr. Stevens? 426 00:23:26,000 --> 00:23:27,583 [ R.J. ] Yeah. Excuse me. 427 00:23:27,583 --> 00:23:31,792 - We found your bag. - Well, all right. Well, that's more like it. 428 00:23:31,792 --> 00:23:34,000 We just need an address. Mm-hmm. [ Groans ] 429 00:23:34,000 --> 00:23:36,291 Get off me, you crazy dog! 430 00:23:38,875 --> 00:23:41,125 What the hell? 431 00:23:47,458 --> 00:23:49,667 You gonna stay inside all day, Dr. Stevens? 432 00:23:49,667 --> 00:23:53,583 N-No, sir. Daddy, you don't have to call me that. 433 00:23:53,583 --> 00:23:56,583 Just don't want to offend the star. 434 00:23:56,583 --> 00:23:59,125 Offend me? Hey-Hey, Daddy. 435 24:00,333 --> 24:02,875 How-- How come you never opened this plasma? 436 24:02,875 --> 24:04,792 I don't need a skinny TV. 437 24:04,792 --> 24:08,458 That console's been there since 1977. Good picture. 438 24:09,333 --> 24:13,333 Daddy, this is a high-def flat screen. 439 24:13,333 --> 24:16,834 Football on Sundays, them hits'll be like boom! 440 24:16,834 --> 24:19,041 Make you feel like you're really there. 441 24:19,041 --> 24:21,959 I am really gonna be there. 442 24:21,959 --> 24:25,125 Your cousin Clyde gave me season tickets. 443 24:25,125 --> 24:27,542 See that picture? 444 24:27,542 --> 24:29,542 That's his third dealership. 445 24:29,542 --> 24:33,500 Man, that Clyde is somethin' special. 446 24:34,834 --> 24:37,208 Yeah. Clyde's special. 447 24:37,208 --> 24:39,500 [ Papa Jenkins ] I gotta get outside. 448 24:39,500 --> 24:43,750 I'm grooming the next Jackie Robinson: my grandson. 449 24:49,000 --> 24:51,542 ♪ [ Humming ] 450 24:57,583 --> 24:59,500 Reg. Huh? 451 24:59,500 --> 25:03,208 That don't look like 300 dollars' worth of ice. It's hot down here, man. 452 25:03,208 --> 25:06,458 Half of it melted before you even got down. I'm tellin' you. The bag was-- 453 25:06,458 --> 25:09,542 [ Stammers ] It's hot down-- Ask anybody about the heat, 'Scoe. 454 25:09,542 --> 25:12,250 I ain't gonna lie about none of that. Man, whatever. 455 25:12,250 --> 25:14,166 - Hey, O. - Yo. 456 25:14,166 --> 25:17,083 How old is crazy-ass Bucky? Shouldn't he be dead by now? 457 25:17,083 --> 25:19,583 Oh, Bucky at least 25 now. 458 25:19,583 --> 25:22,917 Yeah. Yeah, that dog is old, boy. Are you serious? 459 25:22,917 --> 25:25,458 That's 175 people years. 460 25:25,458 --> 25:29,959 And he's still a little player. I'm tellin' you. You better watch little Fiona around here. 461 25:29,959 --> 25:33,583 He gonna hit her in the one that stink and not the one that wink. 462 25:33,583 --> 25:36,917 He good at scoopin' up behind you. [ Pants, Whimpers ] 463 25:36,917 --> 25:40,166 So, um, 464 25:40,166 --> 25:42,792 did I hear Clyde was comin' with Lucinda? 465 25:45,375 --> 25:48,834 Mm-hmm. Should be here any minute now. [ Chuckles ] 466 25:48,834 --> 25:51,583 - I thought she was engaged. - Mm-mmm. 467 25:51,583 --> 25:53,750 That ended a while ago, baby-bruh. Yeah. No, no. 468 25:53,750 --> 25:58,583 She moved to Atlanta, and that smooth nigga Clyde supposed to be hollerin' at her again. 469 25:58,583 --> 26:02,625 What you mean "again"? He ain't never been with her. Never. 470 26:02,625 --> 26:04,959 Ooh, lookee here. Little Hollywood man. Ooh. 471 26:04,959 --> 26:07,417 "He's never been with her. Never." "Never." 472 26:07,417 --> 26:11,166 What, you look like you're tryin' to throw your hat in the ring. 473 26:11,166 --> 26:13,917 No, I'm just settin' the record straight, bubblehead. 474 26:14,708 --> 26:16,625 Set the record straight on this. 475 26:16,625 --> 26:17,625 [ Reggie ] Whoo! Now-- 476 26:17,625 --> 26:20,500 Good God almighty, I smell them funky ribs. 477 26:20,500 --> 26:23,375 - Yeah, baby. They're good. Here, baby-bruh. - Whoo. 478 26:23,375 --> 26:28,000 I need your discriminate tongue to let me know if I'm still on track. 479 26:28,000 --> 26:30,041 You know how I gets down. 480 26:35,000 --> 26:38,291 Get him some bread and a Pepsi right now. No, no. I'm cool. 481 26:38,291 --> 26:41,959 I'm-- I'm gonna wait on the chicken. Skinless. 482 26:41,959 --> 26:44,667 Why? Are you Muslim now? Yeah, what the hell? 483 26:44,667 --> 26:46,834 You a Five Percenter? Nah. 484 26:46,834 --> 26:49,792 I just adopted a low-fat, high-fiber diet. [ Groans ] 485 26:49,792 --> 26:51,750 Bianca and I-- 486 26:51,750 --> 26:55,792 "Bianca and I"-- I know what it is. The black Paris Hilton done sissified you off the pig. 487 26:55,792 --> 26:57,750 - That's what's up. - It ain't like that, O. 488 26:57,750 --> 27:00,792 Bullshit! You on that Hollywood shit. Nigga, please. 489 27:00,792 --> 27:03,500 Give me-- Let me see that. You see this swine... 490 27:03,500 --> 27:06,208 is fine, divine, sublime and right... 491 27:06,208 --> 27:08,500 on time. On time. 492 27:08,500 --> 27:10,875 Man! Look at that. 493 27:10,875 --> 27:13,041 Want some of this dippin' sauce, baby? Yeah. Go on. 494 27:13,041 --> 27:16,041 Taste a little piece. Don't be scared. You got on the Kwanzaa outfit now. 495 27:16,041 --> 27:19,000 Get down, like you live. Go ahead and taste a piece of that. 496 27:19,000 --> 27:22,458 - Go on, man. - How about a piece, Nelson Mandela? 497 27:22,458 --> 27:26,333 - Stop bein' so scary, man. - Farrakhan ain't nowhere around here. Man. 498 27:26,333 --> 27:28,708 - Give him some, man. - Come on. Uh, uh, 499 27:28,708 --> 27:33,667 The-The Last King from Scotland look, with the Forest Whitaker eye. 500 27:33,667 --> 27:36,625 Look. Put a little barbecue sauce on the dead eye. 501 27:36,625 --> 27:39,375 It might jump up out of there. 502 27:39,375 --> 27:42,291 [ Otis ] Boy, you crazy. [ Reggie Chattering ] 503 27:42,291 --> 27:46,500 Whoo, yes indeed, that's gonna be good! 504 27:46,500 --> 27:49,166 Stir that up for me, Bilante. 505 27:49,166 --> 27:52,291 Now, in episode 11, did you have to pull your titties out? 506 27:52,291 --> 27:54,750 I had to have that chocolate cake. 507 27:54,750 --> 27:57,125 But you threw it up-- on purpose. 508 27:57,125 --> 28:01,375 Whether on Survivor or in life, I believe in winning at all costs. 509 28:02,375 --> 28:06,041 That's why R.J. and I are perfectly matched. 510 28:07,959 --> 28:09,917 Girl, you tripping. 511 28:09,917 --> 28:13,000 - You better mind out, Betty. - Come on now, Mama. 512 28:13,000 --> 28:15,708 Roscoe and winnin' don't even go in the same sentence. 513 28:15,708 --> 28:17,917 Only Clyde gets that distinction. 514 28:17,917 --> 28:22,000 - Who's Clyde? - Ooh. I'm glad you asked. 515 28:22,000 --> 28:26,583 Clyde is our cousin. He came to live with us once his folks went on to glory. 516 28:26,583 --> 28:29,000 They became famous and left their child behind? 517 28:29,000 --> 28:33,708 Bitch, are you crazy? They was in a car accident. They dead. Goddamn. 518 28:33,708 --> 28:35,792 [ Gasps ] Oh! Anyway, 519 28:35,792 --> 28:38,166 now, Roscoe and Clyde was fierce rivals. 520 28:38,166 --> 28:40,125 Though "rival" is not quite accurate, 521 28:40,125 --> 28:43,417 'cause Clyde used to whup Roscoe's tail in everything. 522 28:43,417 --> 28:45,458 I don't know about everything now, Betty. 523 28:45,458 --> 28:48,083 Everything, Mama! 524 28:49,750 --> 28:52,083 Basketball. [ Clyde ] Game. 525 28:52,083 --> 28:54,500 [ Betty ] Checkers. 526 28:54,500 --> 28:56,542 King me. 527 28:56,542 --> 28:58,959 [ Betty ] Chess. [ Clyde ] Checkmate. 528 28:58,959 --> 29:02,333 [ Betty ] Arm wrestlin'. [ Groans ] 529 29:04,792 --> 29:07,625 Oops. That was me. 530 29:07,625 --> 29:10,125 You're telling me R.J. never won. Never. 531 29:10,125 --> 29:13,875 That is, of course, until the obstacle course in 1985. 532 29:13,875 --> 29:17,083 - Obstacle course? - Yep. It's a Jenkins family tradition. 533 29:17,083 --> 29:19,708 [ Papa Jenkins ] Have fun now. [ Boy ] Yeah. 534 29:19,708 --> 29:23,500 Clyde, Roscoe, we got our eyes on you. 535 29:23,500 --> 29:27,834 [ Betty ] Clyde and Roscoe made a bet that the winner would get to ask... 536 29:27,834 --> 29:30,834 Lucinda Allen to the spring formal. 537 29:30,834 --> 29:32,667 And who is Lucinda Allen? 538 29:32,667 --> 29:36,208 [ Betty ] Only the most popular Southern belle to ever come out of these parts. 539 29:36,208 --> 29:40,166 - The spring formal queen that year. - [ Bianca ] So what happened? 540 29:40,166 --> 29:43,834 Girl, your man took off like a house afire. 541 29:43,834 --> 29:48,333 - ♪ I'll take you down I'll take you down ♪ - Come on! 542 29:48,333 --> 29:52,083 [ Betty ] He moved through that obstacle course faster than a runaway slave. D-D-D-Doin' it. 543 29:52,083 --> 29:53,500 ♪ If you want more ♪ 544 29:53,500 --> 29:58,625 ♪ If you want more, more, more then jump ♪ 545 29:58,625 --> 30:03,708 [ Betty ] Now, see, Clyde was right there with his skinny ass, baby, neck and neck. 546 30:03,708 --> 30:05,834 He was tryin' to hold on until the end. 547 30:05,834 --> 30:08,375 - But old Roscoe-- - Come on! 548 30:08,375 --> 30:10,917 Old Roscoe broke that tape, baby. 549 30:10,917 --> 30:14,041 He smiled so hard, I thought his cheeks would burst. 550 30:14,041 --> 30:17,041 Yes! Whoo-hoo! [ Cheering ] 551 30:17,041 --> 30:19,875 ♪ My kisses in the night ♪ Yes! I won! 552 30:19,875 --> 30:22,917 [ Betty ] I ain't never seen Mama and Daddy so proud as that day. 553 30:22,917 --> 30:24,125 Aw. 554 30:24,125 --> 30:27,834 Now, all Roscoe had to do was claim the real prize. 555 30:28,875 --> 30:31,750 Lucinda. Hey. 556 30:31,750 --> 30:34,875 Will you go to the spring formal with me? 557 30:36,125 --> 30:40,125 Oh, Roscoe, how sweet, but... Clyde just asked me. 558 30:42,291 --> 30:46,166 Come on, Lucinda. Let's get a strawberry soda. My treat. 559 30:46,166 --> 30:50,375 Okay. Bye, Roscoe. Great race. 560 30:51,375 --> 30:54,917 Bye. [ Betty ] I felt bad for the boy. 561 30:56,250 --> 30:58,583 Nobody knew about the bet, 562 30:58,583 --> 31:00,250 so Clyde just beat him to the punch. 563 31:00,250 --> 31:03,250 ♪ Though I tried to resist ♪ [ Betty ] Clyde and Lucinda... 564 31:03,250 --> 31:09,250 danced all night long, lookin' like eternal lovers. ♪ Being last on your list ♪ 565 31:09,250 --> 31:12,792 And Roscoe looked like a hot mess. 566 31:12,792 --> 31:15,333 And his date wasn't much better. 567 31:15,333 --> 31:19,250 - ♪ So I'm saving all my love♪ - [ Betty ] Lord! Jesus! 568 31:19,250 --> 31:22,417 ♪ Yes, I'm saving all my love♪ 569 31:22,417 --> 31:27,583 But in typical Roscoe fashion, he snitched. But that mess backfired. 570 31:27,583 --> 31:30,333 Lucinda is a young lady, 571 31:30,333 --> 31:32,333 not some trophy you can win. 572 31:32,333 --> 31:35,375 I'm very disappointed in you. 573 31:35,375 --> 31:39,625 - But what about Clyde? - Clyde will be dealt with. 574 31:39,625 --> 31:43,333 Now, drop your britches and bend over. 575 31:48,667 --> 31:50,667 [ Gulps ] 576 31:50,667 --> 31:52,667 Yipes! 577 31:52,667 --> 31:57,333 [ Betty ] But that Clyde-- ooh, girl, he is a smooth operator. 578 31:57,333 --> 31:59,500 All right. What have you got to say for yourself? 579 31:59,500 --> 32:01,375 I let Roscoe win. 580 32:02,417 --> 32:05,333 It meant more to him to beat me, 581 32:05,333 --> 32:08,291 and it meant more to me to go out with Lucinda. 582 32:08,291 --> 32:10,583 She's so beautiful. 583 32:10,583 --> 32:14,500 I know you're disappointed. 584 32:14,500 --> 32:17,583 And if my parents were alive, they'd be disappointed too. 585 32:17,583 --> 32:20,792 But you're the only parent I got, Papa Jenkins. 586 32:20,792 --> 32:22,667 So you do what you think is right. 587 32:22,667 --> 32:24,959 I'll understand. 588 32:28,458 --> 32:33,375 Don't you ever let something like this ever happen again. 589 32:33,375 --> 32:34,667 [ Whispers ] What? 590 32:34,667 --> 32:37,375 You understand? 591 32:40,166 --> 32:42,417 Yes, sir. 592 32:48,208 --> 32:52,458 [ Betty ] He went upstairs and cried like a baby. 593 32:52,458 --> 32:55,083 Now, how you know Roscoe was cryin'? 594 32:55,083 --> 32:56,834 [ Wailing ] 595 32:56,834 --> 33:00,083 [ Betty ] Because all his hollerin' woke me up from a sound sleep. 596 33:01,708 --> 33:04,000 So, are they still an item? 597 33:04,000 --> 33:06,375 [ Betty ] They dated a while, but, you know, 598 33:06,375 --> 33:09,250 the queen is too pure for the likes of Clyde. 599 33:09,250 --> 33:10,875 He needs a real woman. 600 33:10,875 --> 33:13,500 - Betty, y'all cousins. - Whatever. 601 33:13,500 --> 33:16,375 Now, the point is, Roscoe ain't been the same... 602 33:16,375 --> 33:19,875 since Clyde stole Miss Lucinda. 603 33:20,708 --> 33:24,542 I think they call that evolution. 604 33:24,542 --> 33:28,750 R.J.'s clearly over any childhood crush. 605 33:28,750 --> 33:30,917 [ Betty ] Really? Really. 606 33:30,917 --> 33:34,792 Well, where do you think that "Team of Me" mess started? 607 33:35,750 --> 33:37,041 Uh-huh. 608 33:37,041 --> 33:38,750 All right, Betty. That is enough. 609 33:38,750 --> 33:40,792 Okay, Mama, but I'm just sayin'-- 610 33:40,792 --> 33:42,708 Come on in this house before I pop you. 611 33:42,708 --> 33:44,333 [ Betty ] Now somebody help that white girl. 612 33:44,333 --> 33:47,417 She gettin' eggshells in the tater salad. Help her. 613 33:47,417 --> 33:50,625 [ Mama Jenkins ] Always runnin' your mouth. You talk too much. 614 33:50,625 --> 33:52,792 [ Betty ] Don't nobody want no crunchy-ass potato salad. 615 33:52,792 --> 33:54,917 And you put vinegar on these? Yeah. 616 33:54,917 --> 33:58,834 You've gotta market these, O. [ Gasps ] 617 33:58,834 --> 34:01,625 R.J. 618 34:01,625 --> 34:04,917 - Huh? - What the hell are you eating? 619 34:04,917 --> 34:07,917 I'm not eatin', baby. I'm tastin'. 620 34:07,917 --> 34:09,792 These soy ribs. 621 34:09,792 --> 34:13,417 You want some? [ Groans ] Forget it, carnivore. 622 34:13,417 --> 34:15,417 Why don't you tell me about Lucinda Allen? 623 34:15,417 --> 34:17,083 Oh. Oh, shit. Lucinda Allen? 624 34:17,083 --> 34:19,625 - That was a bad one right there. - Well, see, I-- 625 34:19,625 --> 34:21,083 [ Betty Screaming ] Baby, she's just-- 626 34:21,083 --> 34:25,250 Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Hey! Clyde's here now! 627 34:25,250 --> 34:27,917 ♪ [ R & B ] 628 34:43,125 --> 34:47,125 ♪ You've made me happy ♪ ♪ [ Humming, Chuckling ] 629 34:47,917 --> 34:51,125 ♪ This you can bet ♪ 630 34:52,291 --> 34:55,166 ♪ You stood right beside me Yeah ♪ 631 34:55,166 --> 34:57,708 Let-Let me introduce you. ♪ And I won't forget ♪ 632 34:57,708 --> 35:00,625 [ Clyde ] What's up, family? 633 35:01,583 --> 35:04,583 [ Betty ] Ah! Hey, Betty. 634 35:04,583 --> 35:07,041 Girl, look at you. Look at you. [ Otis ] Clyde. 635 35:07,041 --> 35:09,000 What's up, O.? What's up, big law? Yeah. 636 35:09,000 --> 35:11,166 I see you ain't gettin' no bigger. Look at you, boy. 637 35:11,166 --> 35:15,166 [ Otis ] Lucinda, what's up, baby? Ah! Hi. 638 35:15,166 --> 35:19,041 Good seein' you, baby. Look at you, boy. Look. You sure you're our relative? 639 35:19,041 --> 35:21,000 [ Chuckles ] Little Mexican. 640 35:21,000 --> 35:23,125 I got a little somethin' for everybody. 641 35:23,125 --> 35:26,625 I stopped to pick up some red velvet cakes for the picnic. 642 35:26,625 --> 35:30,708 [ Gasps ] From Cooter's Bakery in Tuscaloosa? Yeah. 643 35:30,708 --> 35:35,458 Well, you only get one golden anniversary, Mama J. Oh! 644 35:35,458 --> 35:38,542 [ Squealing ] 645 35:38,542 --> 35:42,208 Hey! Hey now. Uh-oh. There he is. What's up, Papa J? 646 35:42,208 --> 35:44,834 How you doin'? Is the fountain of youth around here somewhere, 647 35:44,834 --> 35:48,041 or you been takin' that Viagra? You better watch it. 648 35:48,041 --> 35:49,917 Seen 'Cinda? Lucinda. 649 35:49,917 --> 35:52,750 I'm so glad to see you. Welcome home. Oh, oh. 650 35:52,750 --> 35:56,208 Now there's nostalgia for you right there. 651 35:56,208 --> 35:59,208 Family spirit award goes to Roscoe. 652 35:59,208 --> 36:01,542 Cross Colour Jones. Look at you, boy. 653 36:01,542 --> 36:04,000 Still wearin' Otis's hand-me-downs. Come here, man. 654 36:04,000 --> 36:07,667 [ Laughing ] Well, the airlines lost my bags. 655 36:07,667 --> 36:09,834 Uh, what's your excuse? 656 36:09,834 --> 36:12,667 [ Chuckles ] Man-- Hey, man. This is that Tiger Hoods, man. 657 36:12,667 --> 36:16,750 You know me. I get my nine holes in. Mmm! 658 36:16,750 --> 36:21,166 - Roscoe Jenkins. [ Chuckles ] - Oh! Whoa! 659 36:21,166 --> 36:23,875 - Oh, it's been ages. - Oh! 660 36:23,875 --> 36:25,708 [ Lucinda ] Oh, wow. It's been so long. 661 36:25,708 --> 36:27,750 [ Bianca Clears Throat ] Oh. 662 36:27,750 --> 36:30,291 Um-- [ Chuckles ] Clyde, Lucinda, 663 36:30,291 --> 36:33,250 this is my fiancée-- uh, my fiancée, uh-- 664 36:33,250 --> 36:35,458 - Bianca. - Bianca Kittles. 665 36:35,458 --> 36:37,542 Bianca! How you doin'? Sweeter than Skittles. 666 36:37,542 --> 36:40,041 Girl, you prettier in person. Is that so? 667 36:42,083 --> 36:45,125 You find somebody who say different, see if I don't slap 'em to sleep. 668 36:45,125 --> 36:48,625 And I don't even get violent. It's my pleasure, Bianca. 669 36:48,625 --> 36:50,750 Wow. Congratulations, you two. 670 36:50,750 --> 36:53,583 The pleasure's mine. [ Chuckles ] 671 36:54,375 --> 36:57,166 [ Whispers ] 672 36:57,166 --> 37:01,708 And, Lord, we thank you for the pork ribs. [ Man ] Yes. 673 37:01,708 --> 37:04,333 As well as, yes, the coleslaw and-- 674 37:04,333 --> 37:07,417 I hear what you're sayin'. Look. I gotta go. Lord, the black-eyed peas. 675 37:07,417 --> 37:11,125 Thank you. And we thank you for the sweet potato pie... 676 37:11,125 --> 37:14,959 and, yes, for the scrumptious red velvet cakes from Cooter's. 677 37:14,959 --> 37:17,375 All right. We thank you, Lord. And they all did say-- 678 37:17,375 --> 37:19,917 [ All ] Amen. 679 37:20,792 --> 37:23,041 We thank you for that beautiful benediction. 680 37:23,041 --> 37:25,083 You mean long. Otis. 681 37:25,083 --> 37:28,125 Mama and I are just filled with joy... 682 37:28,125 --> 37:32,583 so many friends and family have joined us on this very special occasion. 683 37:32,583 --> 37:35,834 This woman has put up with me for five decades, 684 37:35,834 --> 37:38,166 and I love her now more than ever. 685 37:38,166 --> 37:40,792 Thank you, baby. [ Woman ] Aw. 686 37:40,792 --> 37:43,125 [ Man ] Papa J. Hear, hear now. 687 37:43,125 --> 37:46,792 - [ Betty ] Clyde, you try some of this corn, baby? - Mm-hmm. 688 37:46,792 --> 37:50,375 And don't you forget these rolls, 'cause I made 'em with you in mind. 689 37:50,375 --> 37:52,667 You butter the biscuits? You know I did. 690 37:52,667 --> 37:54,792 [ Otis ] Hey, uh, Betty. Betty. What? 691 37:54,792 --> 37:58,166 He's your cousin, not a potential tip. 692 37:58,166 --> 38:00,166 You know what, Otis? Okay. Shut up. 693 38:00,166 --> 38:05,250 Now, I'm just glad to see him. That's all. And-And-- Okay. You too, queenie. 694 38:05,250 --> 38:08,625 Uh, thank you, Betty. Mm-hmm. 695 38:08,625 --> 38:11,792 So, Lucinda, I hear you two were high school sweethearts. 696 38:11,792 --> 38:14,875 Oh, well, that was a long time ago. 697 38:14,875 --> 38:17,291 Yeah. 698 38:17,291 --> 38:20,542 But you never forget your first love. Ain't that right, 'Cinda? 699 38:20,542 --> 38:23,583 [ Scoffs ] [ Lucinda ] Yeah. I guess not. 700 38:23,583 --> 38:25,375 Look at her. Just as beautiful as ever. 701 38:25,375 --> 38:28,542 You know, I'm gonna leave some of these hood rats alone... 702 38:28,542 --> 38:31,375 and get real serious about makin' this girl Mrs. Stubbs. 703 38:31,375 --> 38:34,625 You know, matter of fact, Otis, get me a broom right now. Go ahead now? 704 38:34,625 --> 38:36,917 I'm gonna jump! Mazel tov! 705 38:36,917 --> 38:38,834 You know what I'm talkin' about, O.? 706 38:38,834 --> 38:43,542 Don't believe this one, okay? He's more interested in jumpin' bones than jumpin' brooms. 707 38:43,542 --> 38:45,625 Ooh! [ All Murmuring ] 708 38:45,625 --> 38:48,542 Best of luck to the both of you. You make a great couple. 709 38:48,542 --> 38:50,041 Bullshit! [ Clears Throat ] 710 38:50,041 --> 38:52,250 - Betty! - [ Chuckles ] 711 38:52,250 --> 38:56,333 Excuse me, y'all. I had a piece of celery stuck in my throat. 712 38:56,333 --> 38:59,917 - [ Clyde ] Well, you know, I admit it. I like to play. - [ Mouthing Words ] 713 38:59,917 --> 39:03,333 But, uh, after I get me a couple of more dealerships, 714 39:03,333 --> 39:05,583 I will be king of the South... 715 39:05,583 --> 39:08,834 who will need his queen. [ Chuckles ] 716 39:08,834 --> 39:12,333 Well, my king has a surprise. 717 39:12,333 --> 39:15,542 R.J.'s having a professional camera crew... 718 39:15,542 --> 39:19,125 film the anniversary banquet! 719 39:19,125 --> 39:22,083 - Tell 'em, honey! - [ Woman ] Oh, very sweet. 720 39:22,083 --> 39:24,542 Go ahead. Uh-- 721 39:24,542 --> 39:28,500 Like my baby said, it was supposed to be a surprise. 722 39:28,500 --> 39:31,083 Uh, a gift, really. You know, uh, no big deal. 723 39:31,083 --> 39:34,750 Just a-- Uh, just a little somethin', uh, special for y'all. 724 39:34,750 --> 39:37,291 - That's so sweet. - Wait a minute. Hold up. 725 39:37,291 --> 39:39,458 Nigga, you got some cameras hid around? You brought some cameras? 726 39:39,458 --> 39:42,417 Reggie. You got that shit hidden around her? 727 39:42,417 --> 39:44,458 Oh, y'all seen his show. 728 39:44,458 --> 39:48,125 Roscoe be jumpin' out of bushes on little midgets. [ Mama Jenkins ] Midgets? 729 39:48,125 --> 39:50,542 [ All Laughing ] Neglected albino children. 730 39:50,542 --> 39:52,667 Al-Qaeda leaders. 731 39:52,667 --> 39:54,750 ♪ [ Chanting ] 732 39:54,750 --> 39:57,500 [ Chanting ] Rice. Chicken kebab. Chicken falafel. 733 39:57,500 --> 40:00,792 - ♪ [ Chanting ] - Boy, you crazy. 734 40:00,792 --> 40:03,417 I'm tellin' you. They be scattering like roaches, like Cops. 735 40:03,417 --> 40:06,417 You gonna win a Emmy, and I'm votin' for you. 736 40:06,417 --> 40:08,500 Remember, Son. 737 40:08,500 --> 40:12,041 This is a family celebration, not some Hollywood production. 738 40:12,041 --> 40:14,000 Yes, sir. 739 40:14,000 --> 40:16,917 Oh, hell, it'll be all right, Papa . 740 40:16,917 --> 40:19,417 I'm sure Roscoe gonna do the right thing. 741 40:19,417 --> 40:22,834 I'm just glad to see your baby boy back gracin' us with his presence. 742 40:22,834 --> 40:25,458 [ Chuckles ] Done good, 'Scoe. 743 40:25,458 --> 40:27,834 Got a outstanding career, 744 40:27,834 --> 40:30,500 beautiful fiancée, great son. 745 40:30,500 --> 40:32,166 You finally winnin', man. 746 40:32,166 --> 40:35,166 Don't even matter that you could never beat me at nothin'. 747 40:35,166 --> 40:37,875 Oh, oh, oh, oh, shit. 748 40:37,875 --> 40:40,708 That's the button. [ R.J. ] What you tryin' to do, Clyde? 749 40:41,583 --> 40:44,875 I'm tryin' my best to be a better man. 750 40:44,875 --> 40:48,166 And you tryin' to drag me into a penis-swinging contest? 751 40:48,166 --> 40:51,458 - That definitely ain't no contest. - [ Laughing ] 752 40:52,500 --> 40:54,917 You're a sad man, Clyde. 753 40:54,917 --> 40:58,000 Your competitive edge imprisons you. 754 40:58,959 --> 41:01,208 Feel good for what you've done, 755 41:01,208 --> 41:03,125 not for what you haven't. 756 41:03,125 --> 41:08,041 The one loss you suffered at my hands is still a burden to you. 757 41:08,041 --> 41:11,375 Get over it. I have. 758 41:11,375 --> 41:14,583 That's the Team of Me. 759 41:17,125 --> 41:18,417 Oh. 760 41:18,417 --> 41:19,750 That's right, baby. 761 41:19,750 --> 41:23,708 Oh. And, uh, just for the record, 762 41:23,708 --> 41:26,458 I'll beat you again-- and worse. 763 41:26,458 --> 41:28,625 [ Clyde ] Is that right? 764 41:28,625 --> 41:32,083 Care to make it interesting? Little wager perhaps? 765 41:32,083 --> 41:36,542 For what? You'd just find a way to renege again, "renigga." 766 41:36,542 --> 41:38,041 [ Mama Jenkins ] Oh! Shit. 767 41:38,041 --> 41:39,542 I ain't never reneged on no bet. 768 41:39,542 --> 41:43,250 - You're a damn liar! - Oh, this is gettin' hot. 769 41:43,250 --> 41:46,083 You know damn well what the hell I'm talkin' about. 770 41:46,083 --> 41:49,083 You're a sore loser, and you stole what was mine. 771 42:01,417 --> 42:03,875 The lemonade is good, Mama. 772 42:05,542 --> 42:09,458 There it is. That bitch done made you tough, Roscoe. 773 42:10,583 --> 42:14,083 You hungry as shit, but that bitch done made you tough. 774 42:14,083 --> 42:18,083 [ Door Closes ] [ R.J. ] What is wrong with you? 775 42:18,083 --> 42:21,083 [ Bianca ] I can't believe you're still pining after the prom queen. 776 42:21,083 --> 42:24,667 - We only said three words to each other. - Forty words. 777 42:24,667 --> 42:28,083 And that Clyde-- he's a smug son of a bitch. 778 42:28,083 --> 42:32,792 No wonder he's a car salesman. He's slick and unethical. 779 42:32,792 --> 42:35,750 Why the hell did you tell everybody about the camera crew? 780 42:35,750 --> 42:40,417 They were gonna see them anyway. And besides, we were losing ground. I had to make a move. 781 42:40,417 --> 42:42,959 Bianca, this is not Survivor. 782 42:44,291 --> 42:46,667 Oh, yes, it is. 783 42:46,667 --> 42:50,792 Look, babe, baby, baby. Listen. Listen. 784 42:50,792 --> 42:54,750 [ Exhales ] Let's not fight, okay? I'm sorry. 785 42:54,750 --> 42:59,333 Lucinda was just a crush, but I moved on. 786 43:00,583 --> 43:04,333 So you're over her? How can I not be, with you as my lady? 787 43:06,291 --> 43:08,834 Hmm. 788 43:08,834 --> 43:10,750 Oh. 789 43:10,750 --> 43:14,500 Yeah. That's what I'm talkin' about. Yeah. 790 43:14,500 --> 43:17,583 Oh, baby, all the time I spent here, 791 43:17,583 --> 43:19,792 I never got a little piece of nothin'. 792 43:20,708 --> 43:23,083 No way. 793 43:23,083 --> 43:27,083 These walls are way too thin. And plus, your family listens. 794 43:27,083 --> 43:29,041 That's ridiculous. 795 43:29,041 --> 43:33,750 Look. I want to speak in tongues. Shamma-lamma. 796 43:33,750 --> 43:36,166 Nope. Forget it. 797 43:36,166 --> 43:38,333 Damn! 798 43:43,500 --> 43:46,417 Think you so damn special. 799 43:46,417 --> 43:50,417 I sent a plasma, you bought cake. Nigro, please. 800 43:50,417 --> 43:53,542 Hey, Roscoe. I didn't know you were still up. 801 43:53,542 --> 43:55,708 Hey, Lucinda. How you doin'? 802 43:55,708 --> 43:58,208 I'm great. Who you talkin' to? 803 43:58,208 --> 44:01,041 No-- Nobody. Well, 804 44:01,041 --> 44:03,041 actually, myself. 805 44:03,041 --> 44:05,125 I do that. You know, just practicin' for the show. 806 44:05,125 --> 44:09,250 You know, keep it fresh, you know? Okay. I see. 807 44:09,250 --> 44:11,333 Can you take a break? 808 44:17,208 --> 44:20,041 - Damn. - [ Chuckles ] 809 44:20,041 --> 44:23,125 This cake is scrumptious. I knew you'd like it. 810 44:23,125 --> 44:27,250 So, you said your publicist introduced you. Yeah. Well-- 811 44:27,250 --> 44:30,792 Yeah. We-- 812 44:30,792 --> 44:33,333 We had her on the show after she won, 813 44:33,333 --> 44:36,625 and, uh, we just sorta connected, you know? 814 44:36,625 --> 44:38,792 Wow. So how do she and Jamaal get along? 815 44:38,792 --> 44:40,917 Real good. [ Chuckles ] You know, um, 816 44:40,917 --> 44:42,792 she got him eatin' right. 817 44:42,792 --> 44:45,500 Maternal stuff. He's a great kid. 818 44:45,500 --> 44:48,708 Oh, thank you. Um-- 819 44:49,750 --> 44:52,959 So, you and Clyde-- Oh. Mm-mmm. No. 820 44:52,959 --> 44:56,583 He was a familiar face when I moved to Atlanta. 821 44:56,583 --> 44:59,708 He's sweet, but your cousin's a player. Mmm. 822 44:59,708 --> 45:02,750 What happened to your engagement? Wasn't there some guy? 823 45:02,750 --> 45:05,500 Are you keepin' tabs on me, Roscoe Jenkins? 824 45:05,500 --> 45:07,875 Oh, no, no. I-- I heard things. 825 45:07,875 --> 45:10,583 You know, look at my ears. You know, I heard. I heard it. 826 45:10,583 --> 45:13,083 - You know I heard it. - [ Laughing ] 827 45:14,125 --> 45:16,792 Oh. What did you hear, huh? 828 45:16,792 --> 45:19,166 That I went to school to find a husband, right? 829 45:19,166 --> 45:23,959 See? Yeah, I did. I got engaged early. 830 45:23,959 --> 45:27,125 I had the vision of having a two-income household, 831 45:27,125 --> 45:31,708 three kids before 30, Sunday brunch with my homegirls. 832 45:31,708 --> 45:36,125 Sounds good to me. Don't it, though? 833 45:36,125 --> 45:39,375 But the student loans never go away, 834 45:39,375 --> 45:42,458 you're still broke after grad school, 835 45:42,458 --> 45:45,083 and he didn't want kids. 836 45:46,083 --> 45:48,500 Ever. 837 45:48,500 --> 45:51,583 So, dream deferred. 838 45:51,583 --> 45:54,417 I feel you. 839 45:54,417 --> 45:57,458 Me and Jamaal's mom was a disaster. 840 45:57,458 --> 46:01,208 [ Sighs ] I wasn't ready to be a parent neither. 841 46:01,208 --> 46:03,500 But he's my son. 842 46:03,500 --> 46:06,959 Spoken like a true Jenkins man. 843 46:15,333 --> 46:18,917 - You need to finish that cake. - [ Gasps, Snickers ] 844 46:18,917 --> 46:23,500 - 'Cause if I don't watch this figure, who will? - I could think of some takers. 845 46:23,500 --> 46:27,166 Me too. Sign me up for that booty duty! 846 46:27,166 --> 46:29,667 Hey, Reggie. We were just saying good night. 847 46:29,667 --> 46:32,792 Oh, no. Don't let me interrupt. Don't let me interrupt. 848 46:32,792 --> 46:36,583 Don't let him interrupt. Oh, no, no, n. It's okay. 849 46:36,583 --> 46:39,291 I need to go home and see my parents. 850 46:39,291 --> 46:42,041 And I'll talk to you guys tomorrow. Okay? 851 46:42,041 --> 46:45,417 Good night. Good night. 852 46:46,708 --> 46:48,834 [ Door Opens ] 853 46:52,500 --> 46:54,542 Tell the truth. 854 46:54,542 --> 46:56,458 You got a woody, don't you? 855 46:56,458 --> 47:00,834 Fool, if I had a woody, I'd flip this table over. We was just catchin' up. 856 47:00,834 --> 47:04,667 Your daddy don't want that plasma you bought. 857 47:04,667 --> 47:08,750 Just telling you that right now. And it's a damn shame that it's just goin' to waste like that. 858 47:08,750 --> 47:13,291 Just a TV. Just sittin' there, ain't gonna do nothin', man. 859 47:13,291 --> 47:15,375 There's so many poor people out here that need-- 860 47:15,375 --> 47:17,583 Would you like that-- that plasma, Reggie? 861 47:17,583 --> 47:19,750 I-- Boy, I ain't lyin'. I could use it. 862 47:19,750 --> 47:23,458 - No, would you like to have it? - Yeah. I'm gonna get it and freak it. 863 47:23,458 --> 47:26,041 - I'm gonna have it right. - Not gonna happen. 864 47:26,041 --> 47:28,333 Just tight. That's-- 865 47:28,333 --> 47:30,417 [ Whooping, Squeals ] 866 47:30,417 --> 47:34,208 Hey, Lone Ranger. It's time to saddle up. [ Slaps ] 867 47:34,208 --> 47:35,750 Uh-oh. Gotta go. 868 47:35,750 --> 47:38,333 Hi-yo Silver. 869 47:38,333 --> 47:41,041 Off to the A.T.M. machine. 870 47:42,875 --> 47:46,458 Giddyap. Hyah! Giddyap. 871 47:46,458 --> 47:48,875 [ Amy Laughing ] 872 47:51,125 --> 47:53,458 It's gonna be a long weekend. 873 47:55,834 --> 47:58,708 [ Birds Chirping ] [ Rooster Crows ] 874 47:58,708 --> 48:01,417 [ Mosquito Buzzing ] [ Blows ] 875 48:12,625 --> 48:14,875 ♪ [ Hip-hop ] 876 48:14,875 --> 48:17,792 ♪ Hit me ♪ 877 48:17,792 --> 48:19,792 ♪ Hit me ♪ ♪ Missy be puttin' it down ♪ 878 48:19,792 --> 48:21,792 ♪ I'm the hottest round I told y'all mothers ♪ 879 48:21,792 --> 48:24,834 ♪ Ooh ♪ ♪ Y'all can't stop me now Get your freak on ♪ 880 48:24,834 --> 48:28,750 ♪ Get your freak on Get your freak on Get your freak on ♪ 881 48:28,750 --> 48:31,208 ♪ Is you with me now then biggie, biggie bounce ♪ 882 48:31,208 --> 48:35,083 ♪ I know you dig the way I sw-- sw-- switch my style ♪ 883 48:35,083 --> 48:36,417 ♪ Holla ♪ 884 48:36,417 --> 48:39,625 ♪ Get your freak on Quiet ♪ 885 48:39,625 --> 48:41,792 [ Farts ] Excu-- Excuse me. 886 48:41,792 --> 48:44,500 [ Farts ] Oh. Excuse. 887 48:46,375 --> 48:49,125 Baby, my downward dog is fine. 888 48:49,125 --> 48:51,166 Your alignment's off. 889 48:51,166 --> 48:52,750 Watch me. 890 48:52,750 --> 48:54,291 [ Inhales ] 891 48:55,875 --> 48:58,625 [ Exhales ] 892 48:58,625 --> 49:01,667 Damn, you are flexible! 893 49:01,667 --> 49:05,875 - Good morning, Reggie. - Good mornin' to you. What's up, 'Scoe? 894 49:05,875 --> 49:08,000 What the fuck you lookin' at, Reggie? 895 49:08,000 --> 49:10,500 You wanna glue your eyes back into your head now? 896 49:10,500 --> 49:13,834 My fault. I didn't mean to look, but I was just checkin' out the pose. 897 49:13,834 --> 49:15,792 - Hey. - That is nice. That's hot. That is so hot. 898 49:15,792 --> 49:18,333 Can I help you with somethin', Reggie? 899 49:18,333 --> 49:21,625 - Oh, your bag is here. - You couldn't just say that from Jump Street? 900 49:21,625 --> 49:25,375 I was distracted 'cause it looked like somebody hit you in the face with a sack of nickels. 901 49:25,375 --> 49:28,041 Well, maybe a foot in your ass will help you focus, huh? 902 49:28,041 --> 49:31,250 Maybe a slice of red velvet cake'll help you focus. 903 49:37,625 --> 49:41,166 Man, get your look and move on. One look. 904 49:41,166 --> 49:43,792 [ Sighs ] 905 49:43,792 --> 49:46,542 - And down. - That's it. One. One. 906 49:46,542 --> 49:50,083 - One more. One more. One time. - That's it. Move on. 907 49:50,083 --> 49:52,500 Oh, my God. Damn, 'Scoe. 908 49:52,500 --> 49:55,959 Namasté. Oh! Hey. 909 49:55,959 --> 49:58,667 Reggie's got a Frank Aaron jersey too, baby. 910 49:58,667 --> 50:02,000 That's Hank, baby. And mine is a limited edition. 911 50:02,000 --> 50:04,250 Reggie wouldn't even know where to look for one. 912 50:04,250 --> 50:07,583 Oh, it's your world, player. I'm just a squirrel tryin' to get a nut. 913 50:07,583 --> 50:09,417 If you know what I mean. 914 50:09,417 --> 50:11,500 [ Whimpers ] [ Reggie ] Mmm. 915 50:11,500 --> 50:15,417 Man, you need to get her pregnant soon. [ Kisses ] Come on, Bucky. Let's go. 916 50:19,083 --> 50:22,458 [ Growls, Murmurs ] 917 50:23,875 --> 50:27,708 Oh, my God. Did you see that? 918 50:28,625 --> 50:31,792 Yeah. That's my jersey, ain't it? 919 50:34,041 --> 50:37,750 Come on, Jamaal. I don't think I'm cut out for softball. 920 50:37,750 --> 50:40,083 Don't be such a girl about it. 921 50:41,250 --> 50:44,083 Jamaal, forget all that. You're a natural. 922 50:44,083 --> 50:46,542 Plus, this was your dad's sport. 923 50:46,542 --> 50:49,959 All right? The main thing is to relax and keep cool. 924 50:49,959 --> 50:51,792 Just like your dad. 925 50:51,792 --> 50:52,959 [ R.J. ] Come on. We got 'em. 926 50:52,959 --> 50:56,625 We got 'em. Come on. We got 'em. We got 'em. 927 50:56,625 --> 50:58,542 - [ Clyde ] You're out, sucker. - Damn it. 928 50:58,542 --> 51:02,291 Good throw, Betty. How could this fool steal everything but third? 929 51:02,291 --> 51:06,208 'Cause I got a cannon in this arm, boy. A-Rod ain't stealin' on me. 930 51:06,208 --> 51:08,333 Damn, I'm a thief. I don't never get caught stealin'. 931 51:08,333 --> 51:11,708 - Can't steal third, brother. Not around here. - My-- My shirt. 932 51:11,708 --> 51:14,792 Go home, man. Yeah, my fault. This ain't authentic, is it? 933 51:14,792 --> 51:16,875 Yeah. [ Chuckles ] 934 51:16,875 --> 51:19,500 Where does that child think she is? 935 51:19,500 --> 51:23,041 I don't know, but I bet that come with paint remover. 936 51:23,041 --> 51:24,959 [ Mama Jenkins Laughs ] God! 937 51:24,959 --> 51:27,083 [ R.J. ] Jamaal, widen your stance, Son. 938 51:27,083 --> 51:29,500 Keep your eye on the ball. Choke up on the bat. 939 51:29,500 --> 51:31,500 Focus. Okay. 940 51:31,500 --> 51:34,708 Do what your father told you, okay? Now, don't be scared of Callie. 941 51:34,708 --> 51:37,333 I know she's big. We're all big. 942 51:37,333 --> 51:41,208 - That's why you in question. - [ R.J. ] Jamaal, focus. 943 51:41,208 --> 51:44,458 [ Papa Jenkins ] All right. It's 0 and 2. Come on, Jamaal. 944 51:44,458 --> 51:47,667 - Strike three. - [ Mama Jenkins ] That's all right, baby. 945 51:47,667 --> 51:50,542 - That's a good try. - [ Groans ] God, this kid is pathetic. 946 51:50,542 --> 51:53,291 - [ Mama Jenkins ] Made your grandma proud. - [ Papa ] Good try, Jamaal. 947 51:53,291 --> 51:57,417 N-No, it wasn't, Daddy. What is he, Roscoe? One of them meatless people? 948 51:57,417 --> 52:01,166 Is he one of them vegans or "vogans," whatever? You need to feed that child, Roscoe. 949 52:01,166 --> 52:03,375 That's what's wrong with him. You ain't givin' him-- 950 52:03,375 --> 52:04,500 [ Gasps ] 951 52:04,500 --> 52:06,625 Good one, Callie. 952 52:06,625 --> 52:09,875 I can't understand, and he's dumb in the brain. 953 52:13,083 --> 52:15,750 [ Mama Jenkins ] Come on, Roscoe. Hit one for Mama. 954 52:15,750 --> 52:18,458 All I need you to do is make contact. 955 52:18,458 --> 52:22,166 - I got this. - You got a strikeout comin' if you ain't careful. 956 52:22,166 --> 52:25,792 Youse got a strikeout comin' if you ain't careful. 957 52:25,792 --> 52:27,625 Boy, youse g-- 958 52:27,625 --> 52:30,625 [ Otis ] Y'all don't take the smile for a weakness all the time, okay? 959 52:30,625 --> 52:33,208 - I never thought that. - Y'all think I'm weak or somethin'. 960 52:33,208 --> 52:37,333 No, I don't think you're weak. I thought you was Uncle Ben. Okay. Don't. Okay-- 961 52:37,333 --> 52:39,291 Hey-- 962 52:39,291 --> 52:41,208 Take a seat. Let me get this right here. 963 52:41,208 --> 52:44,708 All right. That's what I'm talkin' about now. Let the games begin. 964 52:44,708 --> 52:47,041 - Come on, baby. - [ Blows ] 965 52:47,041 --> 52:49,375 What the hell you think you're doin', Clyde? 966 52:49,375 --> 52:51,917 I'm about to strike you out, player. 967 52:51,917 --> 52:53,625 I've got a narrow strike zone, boy. 968 52:53,625 --> 52:58,417 Oh, that's all right, Papa J. Anything wider than Roscoe's head would be unfair. 969 52:58,417 --> 52:59,625 [ All Laugh ] 970 52:59,625 --> 53:02,750 Everybody sit down. Have a seat. Take a load off. 971 53:02,750 --> 53:06,375 Get comfortable. Don't worry about it. Bring La-Z-Boys out here or somethin'. 972 53:06,375 --> 53:09,250 Come on, boy. I got this right here. 973 53:09,250 --> 53:12,583 What's up, 'Scoe? 974 53:12,583 --> 53:14,583 You ready? You want to be in the big time? 975 53:14,583 --> 53:17,458 - Here we go. Yeah. - [ Betty ] Right here, baby. 976 53:18,583 --> 53:20,291 Strike! 977 53:20,291 --> 53:24,125 [ Shudders ] That's better than air-conditioning right there, boy. 978 53:24,125 --> 53:25,583 [ Blows ] 979 53:25,583 --> 53:27,250 Feel that breeze? [ Laughs ] 980 53:27,250 --> 53:32,417 Come on, Roscoe. They're just talkin' smack, baby. 981 53:32,417 --> 53:34,375 You can do it, baby. 982 53:34,375 --> 53:38,083 Focus, R.J.! Come on! Get a hit! 983 53:38,083 --> 53:41,125 Whoa. "Focus, R.J." 984 53:41,125 --> 53:43,750 All right. Everybody good? 985 53:43,750 --> 53:47,667 Betty. Oh, hey. Give me-- Give me a little somethin'. Okay. 986 53:53,083 --> 53:55,041 Okay. I got you. Good to go. 987 53:55,041 --> 53:58,166 All right. Cool, cool, cool. 988 53:58,166 --> 53:59,625 Right here. 989 54:07,458 --> 54:09,083 Crush it! Kill it! 990 54:12,291 --> 54:14,041 - [ Groans ] - Ooh! 991 54:14,041 --> 54:17,291 - [ Otis Screams ] You done hit my mama! - Mama! 992 54:17,291 --> 54:19,208 Mama J.! 993 54:19,208 --> 54:21,166 [ Mama Jenkins ] Oh, Jesus. 994 54:21,166 --> 54:24,875 [ Reggie ] That done knocked the wig off and everything. Damn. 995 54:27,166 --> 54:31,250 [ R.J. ] Get off me about it right now. Really? Get off you about it? 996 54:31,250 --> 54:33,166 Yeah. Okay? Stop sweatin' me about it. 997 54:33,166 --> 54:35,834 But I was tryin' to tell you wait on the flutter ball. 998 54:35,834 --> 54:37,875 You up there swingin' like Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon. 999 54:37,875 --> 54:40,000 Now my mama got a red titty on her head. 1000 54:40,000 --> 54:43,792 She's my mama too, O. We don't know that. You could be adopted. 1001 54:43,792 --> 54:47,375 I gotta get the fish. Meet me at Monty's. Can you do that? 1002 54:50,834 --> 54:54,667 Mama, I'm sorry. Really sorry, Mama. 1003 54:54,667 --> 54:58,125 I know, baby. Mama'll be all right. 1004 54:58,125 --> 55:01,708 I was tryin' to hit it out of the park. I didn't know it was goin' that way. 1005 55:01,708 --> 55:04,208 I'm gettin' my headache, baby. Be quiet. 1006 55:04,208 --> 55:07,750 - Daddy-- - Son, we all make mistakes. 1007 55:07,750 --> 55:09,542 We just have to learn from them. 1008 55:09,542 --> 55:15,375 Though I don't know what you learn by giving your mama a concussion. 1009 55:19,708 --> 55:21,917 [ Laughs ] [ Man ] Hey, Big O. 1010 55:21,917 --> 55:24,917 [ Scoffs ] I don't know how you take it down here, O. 1011 55:24,917 --> 55:27,834 Man, you was the best linebacker in the state. 1012 55:27,834 --> 55:30,250 If it wasn't for your knee injury, shoot. 1013 55:30,250 --> 55:34,250 Man, you'd be in the NFL, livin' in a mansion, drivin' a Benz. 1014 55:34,250 --> 55:36,083 [ Chuckles ] Yeah, that's good, man, 1015 55:36,083 --> 55:38,375 but, you know, it wasn't in God's plans for me. 1016 55:38,375 --> 55:41,458 God's plan is cool, but you needed the "Me" plan. 1017 55:41,458 --> 55:45,750 Oh, man. Stop talkin' that bullshit. I ain't no failure. I'm a king. 1018 55:45,750 --> 55:51,000 I got a great family. I live in a great community that I love and that loves me back. 1019 55:51,000 --> 55:53,959 - [ Chuckles ] You the failure. - How do you figure that? 1020 55:53,959 --> 55:56,792 I made it. Oh, why? 'Cause you got some money? 1021 55:56,792 --> 55:59,417 'Cause you're on TV? What else you got to show for it? 1022 55:59,417 --> 56:01,417 Everything I ain't have growin' up. 1023 56:01,417 --> 56:03,375 What you ain't have that was that important? 1024 56:03,375 --> 56:07,417 And why don't Jamaal know how to play baseball? 1025 56:07,417 --> 56:09,750 You used to love to play, and you was halfway decent. 1026 56:09,750 --> 56:12,000 Man, I ain't got time for all that. 1027 56:12,000 --> 56:15,417 Besides, Jamaal only loves soccer. [ Chuckles ] 1028 56:15,417 --> 56:18,917 I think Jamaal would love whatever sport his father showed interest in. 1029 56:18,917 --> 56:21,875 [ Scoffs ] Oh, so you're a parenting expert now? 1030 56:21,875 --> 56:24,792 [ Scoffs ] Man, all I'm sayin' is... 1031 56:24,792 --> 56:26,792 don't let money raise your kids. 1032 56:26,792 --> 56:29,875 Well, don't let corn bread and chitlins raise yours. 1033 56:29,875 --> 56:32,917 What you lookin' at me like that for, O.? 1034 56:32,917 --> 56:34,792 Yeah, I said it. 1035 56:34,792 --> 56:36,959 Why you approachin' me? 1036 56:36,959 --> 56:40,041 I just didn't hear you. I said what you lookin' at me like that for? 1037 56:40,041 --> 56:43,625 Ain't nobody scared of you. What'd you say before that? Don't let what? 1038 56:43,625 --> 56:45,625 Don't let chitlins, corn bread, 1039 56:45,625 --> 56:49,250 ham hocks, cheese sticks or none of that raise your kids. 1040 56:49,250 --> 56:53,291 That's what I said. What, you got hostility? What-What-What's happenin'? 1041 56:53,291 --> 56:56,500 This ain't your little brother no more, O. I'm a grown man. 1042 56:56,500 --> 56:58,834 You know, I don't get ass-whuppings. I give 'em out. 1043 56:58,834 --> 57:02,583 - Mm-hmm. - You're a officer here in Mayberry. 1044 57:02,583 --> 57:05,583 Come on. What you carry? A flashlight and a baton? 1045 57:05,583 --> 57:08,250 Tell you what. Maybe, 1046 57:08,250 --> 57:11,917 if you're a good old boy, I'll hire you as my security. 1047 57:11,917 --> 57:15,667 Yeah. I got the pull. I can do it. [ Chuckles ] Big-ass-- 1048 57:20,750 --> 57:23,834 Now you and Mama got matchin' titties. 1049 57:23,834 --> 57:26,291 Maybe y'all are related. 1050 57:27,708 --> 57:29,792 [ Birds Chirping ] 1051 57:36,750 --> 57:40,875 ♪ [ "Super Freak" On Car Radio ] 1052 57:43,750 --> 57:45,583 [ Laughing ] 1053 57:45,583 --> 57:48,500 ♪ She's a very kinky girl ♪ 1054 57:48,500 --> 57:52,291 You know, you should do a show about scrawny little brothers... 1055 57:52,291 --> 57:55,458 that constantly get bitched. 1056 57:55,458 --> 57:57,834 Look at your head! [ Laughing Continues ] 1057 57:57,834 --> 57:59,708 Yeah, but thank you. 1058 57:59,708 --> 58:03,291 My next show gonna be about prison hos-- Oh. 1059 58:03,291 --> 58:05,333 who mask conjugal visits as Bible readings. 1060 58:05,333 --> 58:07,041 Uh-uh. 1061 58:07,041 --> 58:11,041 Yeah, it's gonna be called "Bible Thumpers or Bible Humpers?" 1062 58:11,041 --> 58:14,750 You available? [ Laughing ] 1063 58:14,750 --> 58:16,875 You got time? 1064 58:16,875 --> 58:19,000 [ Engine Off ] 1065 58:20,125 --> 58:23,458 What you feelin'? Oh. Oh, okay. 1066 58:23,458 --> 58:25,542 Better get your Butterfinger-eatin' ass back in the car. 1067 58:25,542 --> 58:29,250 I may not hit a woman, but I'll beat a bitch's ass. Is that what you gonna do? 1068 58:29,250 --> 58:32,333 Yeah. What? That's what you gonna do? You gonna beat a bitch's ass? 1069 58:32,333 --> 58:34,583 Oh! What bitch you gonna beat, 'Scoe? 1070 58:34,583 --> 58:36,959 What bitch you gonna beat? Huh, 'Scoe? Is that what it's like? 1071 58:36,959 --> 58:41,291 What bitch you gonna beat? Oh-ho! You snapped my neck! Look at that. You didn't know. 1072 58:41,291 --> 58:44,291 Golden Glove. What? I'm gonna give you a dirty South ass-whippin'! 1073 58:44,291 --> 58:47,458 Oh! Come on. Come on. Bring it back, punk! 1074 58:47,458 --> 58:49,583 Come on. [ Angry Shouting ] 1075 58:49,583 --> 58:52,917 Oh! Roscoe, get your-- Get off of me, 'Scoe! 1076 58:52,917 --> 58:56,375 [ Ripping] That ain't real, you fool! 1077 58:56,375 --> 58:58,333 Oh, you gonna be sorry! 1078 58:58,333 --> 59:01,000 I'm gonna kick your ass! Wait a minute! 1079 59:01,000 --> 59:04,083 You done pulled out my damn tracks! [ Groaning ] 1080 59:04,083 --> 59:09,125 What you gonna do, R.J.? I'm sick of you! Say you sorry. Say "uncle." Say "uncle"! 1081 59:09,125 --> 59:14,041 Say "uncle"! Say it! Talk your shit now, you fake-ass Bruce Lee! 1082 59:14,041 --> 59:16,458 [ Grunting ] You wanna get up? You wanna get up? Come on. 1083 59:16,458 --> 59:19,458 Come on. I done told you about your mouth. 1084 59:19,458 --> 59:23,708 I am not a ho! I am doin' God's work! 1085 59:23,708 --> 59:26,291 Say "Praise the Lord!" [ Grunts ] 1086 59:26,291 --> 59:29,959 [ Groaning ] Now, I'm gonna tell you somethin'. 1087 59:29,959 --> 59:32,917 You'd better be glad I'm a good Christian... 1088 59:32,917 --> 59:36,333 'cause the next time I might not be so merciful. 1089 59:36,333 --> 59:39,000 You done made me lose my protection from the Lord. 1090 59:39,000 --> 59:42,458 Father God, forgive him, for he know not what he do. 1091 59:42,458 --> 59:45,625 Mmm. I'm gonna pray for you, Roscoe. 1092 59:47,250 --> 59:50,458 Thank you. I appreci-- 1093 59:51,959 --> 59:54,041 [ Wheezes ] 1094 59:57,875 --> 01:00:00,959 [ Groaning, Gasping ] 1095 01:00:04,500 --> 01:00:07,041 [ Loud Groaning ] 1096 01:00:08,041 --> 01:00:10,166 [ Footsteps On Stairs ] 1097 01:00:10,166 --> 01:00:14,834 Hey, Lucinda. Oh, my God! Roscoe, are you okay? 1098 01:00:14,834 --> 01:00:16,834 What you mean? 1099 01:00:16,834 --> 01:00:20,000 Well, your face looks like you got run over by a tractor. 1100 01:00:20,000 --> 01:00:22,708 Really? I feel fine. 1101 01:00:22,708 --> 01:00:24,959 Well, it looks terrible. Here. 1102 01:00:24,959 --> 01:00:28,041 Sit. Oh. 1103 01:00:29,667 --> 01:00:32,750 [ Chuckles ] Oh, my God! 1104 01:00:33,625 --> 01:00:37,417 Here. Oh. [ Groans ] 1105 01:00:37,417 --> 01:00:39,500 Mmm. That feels good. 1106 01:00:39,500 --> 01:00:41,834 Mmm. Good. Good. 1107 01:00:43,000 --> 01:00:47,792 Hey, i-- it might be a good idea to stop teasing everybody. 1108 01:00:47,792 --> 01:00:50,417 [ Laughing ] This is nothin'. 1109 01:00:50,417 --> 01:00:53,625 Why you tryin' to front? I'm not frontin'. 1110 01:00:53,625 --> 01:00:55,667 I'm just-- Aah. Oh. Oh. 1111 01:00:55,667 --> 01:00:59,500 See? See? You know you hurtin'. 1112 01:01:00,667 --> 01:01:03,417 The Roscoe Jenkins I knew would've owned up to it. 1113 01:01:04,667 --> 01:01:07,917 Well, this is R.J. Stevens you tendin' to now, girl. 1114 01:01:07,917 --> 01:01:10,125 Yeah. The new and improved. 1115 01:01:10,125 --> 01:01:12,583 Roscoe 7.0. 1116 01:01:12,583 --> 01:01:17,041 I think Roscoe 1.0... 1117 01:01:17,041 --> 01:01:19,083 was just fine. 1118 01:01:25,417 --> 01:01:27,750 Oh. I didn't know you were back. 1119 01:01:27,750 --> 01:01:31,000 We weren't doin' nothin'! 1120 01:01:31,000 --> 01:01:34,708 Uh, nothin' much, that is. 1121 01:01:37,125 --> 01:01:39,375 Well, good. 1122 01:01:39,375 --> 01:01:41,750 Why don't you give me a hand, Roscoe? 1123 01:01:41,750 --> 01:01:44,500 Papa J., I thought you wanted me to help. No, that's all right. 1124 01:01:44,500 --> 01:01:46,458 Roscoe's got this. 1125 01:01:46,458 --> 01:01:49,959 Yeah, I got this. 1126 01:01:56,875 --> 01:01:58,917 [ Grumbles ] 1127 01:01:58,917 --> 01:02:00,917 ♪ [ Radio: Jazz ] 1128 01:02:00,917 --> 01:02:03,125 [ Hammering ] 1129 01:02:06,792 --> 01:02:08,959 Son, 1130 01:02:08,959 --> 01:02:11,458 you are ready to get married, aren't you? 1131 01:02:11,458 --> 01:02:14,375 [ Chuckling ] Of course. 1132 01:02:14,375 --> 01:02:17,291 Yeah. Yeah! Why do you ask? 1133 01:02:17,291 --> 01:02:20,291 Well, if I didn't know any better, 1134 01:02:20,291 --> 01:02:23,000 I'd think there was something going on between you and Lucinda. 1135 01:02:23,000 --> 01:02:26,458 Oh, no. I'm-- I'm just-- 1136 01:02:26,458 --> 01:02:30,500 You know, we-we just catchin' up. 1137 01:02:30,500 --> 01:02:33,625 Daddy, the weddin' is gonna be hot. 1138 01:02:33,625 --> 01:02:37,125 [ Chuckling ] Got the caterer. R. Kelly's singin'. 1139 01:02:37,125 --> 01:02:41,500 Beyoncé is gonna choreograph the Electric Slide. Um-- 1140 01:02:41,500 --> 01:02:45,125 Roscoe, I think you know what I'm saying. 1141 01:02:46,458 --> 01:02:49,041 A marriage isn't about the wedding day. 1142 01:02:49,041 --> 01:02:52,125 Your mama and I got married right there in the front yard. 1143 01:02:52,125 --> 01:02:54,041 I know, but-- 1144 01:02:54,041 --> 01:02:58,000 Well, Bianca wants a big weddin' with all the trimmings. 1145 01:02:58,000 --> 01:03:00,125 Is that what you want? 1146 01:03:01,083 --> 01:03:03,208 I-- Yeah, I-- 1147 01:03:03,208 --> 01:03:05,667 You-- I think-- 1148 01:03:05,667 --> 01:03:10,166 I d-- I do. I do! [ Chuckling ] 1149 01:03:10,166 --> 01:03:12,458 How does Jamaal feel about that? 1150 01:03:12,458 --> 01:03:16,208 [ Sighs ] Jam-- Jamaal, he-- Jamaal's cool, Daddy. 1151 01:03:16,208 --> 01:03:19,625 Be mindful of that boy. 1152 01:03:19,625 --> 01:03:21,875 He never sees his own mother. 1153 01:03:21,875 --> 01:03:24,750 And from what he tells me, he doesn't see much of you either. 1154 01:03:24,750 --> 01:03:27,500 I'm trying, Daddy. 1155 01:03:27,500 --> 01:03:30,375 All right? But the show keeps me so busy-- 1156 01:03:30,375 --> 01:03:33,917 Oh, the show. Team of Me. 1157 01:03:35,417 --> 01:03:37,583 I never quite understood that. 1158 01:03:37,583 --> 01:03:39,708 Well, it's-- it's just a sayin'. 1159 01:03:39,708 --> 01:03:43,125 You know, protect yourself, be your own man. 1160 01:03:43,125 --> 01:03:46,000 Well, that's fine, Son, but... there are times... 1161 01:03:46,000 --> 01:03:49,542 you gotta depend on others-- family and friends. 1162 01:03:49,542 --> 01:03:52,375 I mean, you never learned anything like that around here. 1163 01:03:52,375 --> 01:03:55,834 And that's certainly not something you teach a child. 1164 01:03:59,917 --> 01:04:02,959 Some kids learn it on their own, Daddy. 1165 01:04:20,083 --> 01:04:22,333 [ Door Closes ] 1166 01:04:22,333 --> 01:04:25,041 [ Snoring ] 1167 01:04:26,542 --> 01:04:29,583 [ Snoring Continues ] Honey. 1168 01:04:29,583 --> 01:04:32,917 Hmm? I've been busy with a personal project all morning. 1169 01:04:32,917 --> 01:04:37,375 And I'm exhausted, so be a dear and walk Fifi for me? 1170 01:04:37,375 --> 01:04:39,500 Come on, baby. 1171 01:04:39,500 --> 01:04:42,208 Let Feef run around and enjoy nature. 1172 01:04:42,208 --> 01:04:44,708 I was hopin' to get a little nap. 1173 01:04:44,708 --> 01:04:48,625 Aww. My "widdle" man is tired. 1174 01:04:48,625 --> 01:04:50,875 Well, 1175 01:04:50,875 --> 01:04:54,125 I promise I'll do any "widdle" thing you want... 1176 01:04:54,125 --> 01:04:56,250 if you do this "widdle" thing for me. 1177 01:04:56,250 --> 01:04:58,291 Hmm? 1178 01:04:58,291 --> 01:05:01,291 Plus, I want to show you my "widdle" project. 1179 01:05:01,291 --> 01:05:03,583 [ Electronic Buzzing ] 1180 01:05:05,125 --> 01:05:07,667 What project? 1181 01:05:08,500 --> 01:05:11,250 Damn! [ Laughing ] 1182 01:05:11,250 --> 01:05:13,500 [ Whining ] 1183 01:05:13,500 --> 01:05:15,959 Are those my initials? 1184 01:05:15,959 --> 01:05:17,750 Mm-hmm. [ Razor Buzzes ] 1185 01:05:17,750 --> 01:05:19,917 I told you it was yours. 1186 01:05:21,250 --> 01:05:23,667 You a hell of an artist, baby. 1187 01:05:25,083 --> 01:05:27,500 Come on, Feef! 1188 01:05:32,083 --> 01:05:34,834 Come on, Feef. Go pee. 1189 01:05:36,917 --> 01:05:41,000 [ Hissing] Oh, shit! Snake! Feef! Come on, Feef! 1190 01:05:41,000 --> 01:05:42,500 [ Barking] Run, Fifi! 1191 01:05:42,500 --> 01:05:46,000 Run! Come on! [ Kissing Sounds ] Come-- 1192 01:05:46,000 --> 01:05:48,000 Hey! Lucinda. What's the matter? 1193 01:05:48,000 --> 01:05:50,667 Don't go down there. Fifi's cornered by this big-ass poisonous snake. 1194 01:05:50,667 --> 01:05:53,375 And you left her? No. Lucinda! 1195 01:05:53,375 --> 01:05:55,875 Save yourself! 1196 01:05:57,417 --> 01:06:01,250 [ Squealing ] Oh! You see? I-I'm sorry, Fifi! 1197 01:06:01,250 --> 01:06:04,917 I ain't suckin' out no-- no poison! 1198 01:06:04,917 --> 01:06:09,250 You okay, girl? Yeah? You just got a little scare, huh? 1199 01:06:09,250 --> 01:06:11,667 Oh! Fifi. 1200 01:06:11,667 --> 01:06:14,375 It's okay. It's all right. She all right? 1201 01:06:14,375 --> 01:06:16,458 Yeah. Here you go. Ahh. 1202 01:06:16,458 --> 01:06:18,667 See? It was just a little milk snake. Aah! 1203 01:06:18,667 --> 01:06:21,542 [ Sighs ] That wasn't the snake I saw. 1204 01:06:21,542 --> 01:06:24,083 It was a anaconda or-- or a python. 1205 01:06:24,083 --> 01:06:27,458 - Well, we don't have those down here. - For real? 1206 01:06:27,458 --> 01:06:30,750 Uh-huh. There you go. 1207 01:06:31,750 --> 01:06:34,583 [ Sighs ] You want to take a walk? 1208 01:06:36,500 --> 01:06:38,250 Sure. 1209 01:06:38,250 --> 01:06:41,000 [ Chuckling ] You runnin' off with that red velvet cake, huh? 1210 01:06:41,000 --> 01:06:43,041 I deserve some cake. Yeah. No, you-- 1211 01:06:43,041 --> 01:06:45,083 That cake will go right to your-- 1212 01:06:45,083 --> 01:06:48,667 Oh, come on. You heard the stories. Hell, you witnessed a bunch. 1213 01:06:48,667 --> 01:06:51,250 Everybody did everything better than me. 1214 01:06:51,250 --> 01:06:53,166 So I found somethin' I'm good at. 1215 01:06:53,166 --> 01:06:56,166 I get in front of that audience, 1216 01:06:56,166 --> 01:06:59,500 and-and they feel me, more than anyone here ever did. 1217 01:06:59,500 --> 01:07:03,083 Please, Roscoe. What family doesn't mess with one another? 1218 01:07:03,083 --> 01:07:05,792 I mean, I got teased to no end about my skinny legs. 1219 01:07:05,792 --> 01:07:08,041 Yeah, well, you do have some slim jims. 1220 01:07:08,041 --> 01:07:11,208 Shut up! You could pick your teeth with those legs. 1221 01:07:11,208 --> 01:07:13,208 Shut up! See? 1222 01:07:13,208 --> 01:07:16,750 You can dish it out, boy, especially when it comes to Clyde. 1223 01:07:16,750 --> 01:07:19,417 Clyde. [ Scoffs ] 1224 01:07:19,417 --> 01:07:22,750 Clyde's big-headed ass needs to be knocked off his high horse sometimes. 1225 01:07:22,750 --> 01:07:25,542 Why are you two always digging at each other? 1226 01:07:25,542 --> 01:07:29,708 Because Clyde is dirty and will use any underhanded trick to win. 1227 01:07:29,708 --> 01:07:32,041 Aren't you exaggerating just a little? 1228 01:07:32,041 --> 01:07:34,208 Uh, no. 1229 01:07:34,208 --> 01:07:37,125 And what was all that "you stole what was mine" business? 1230 01:07:37,125 --> 01:07:41,291 Hmm? At the picnic. What did he steal? 1231 01:07:45,166 --> 01:07:47,333 A great opportunity. 1232 01:07:51,792 --> 01:07:56,333 Well, if it was that great, why can't you create another one? 1233 01:07:59,375 --> 01:08:01,583 Maybe I will. 1234 01:08:03,000 --> 01:08:05,834 Maybe you should. 1235 01:08:05,834 --> 01:08:08,291 Well, well, well! 1236 01:08:08,291 --> 01:08:10,625 Here y'all are again! 1237 01:08:12,250 --> 01:08:14,834 Uh-huh! Caught you, didn't I? 1238 01:08:14,834 --> 01:08:17,500 Mama gonna get ya. Uh-huh. 1239 01:08:17,500 --> 01:08:20,250 This raises some eyebrows. 1240 01:08:20,250 --> 01:08:23,250 Sing like a canary, Reggie. [ Whistles ] Whistle. 1241 01:08:23,250 --> 01:08:25,125 ♪ [ Vocalizing ] All that with the birds. 1242 01:08:25,125 --> 01:08:29,166 Harmonize with 'em, but you're not gettin' the plasma. 1243 01:08:29,166 --> 01:08:31,417 I was walkin' the dog. 1244 01:08:31,417 --> 01:08:35,375 How's that? Bucky's with us. 1245 01:08:35,375 --> 01:08:39,625 I'm talkin' about Fiona. By the-- Where is Feef? 1246 01:08:39,625 --> 01:08:42,667 Oh, I think she's down by the gully. Where's Bucky? 1247 01:08:42,667 --> 01:08:45,166 - Down by the gully. - Oh! 1248 01:08:45,166 --> 01:08:48,291 Move! [ Reggie ] Oh, he gonna tear it up! 1249 01:08:48,291 --> 01:08:50,707 - [ Bucky Howling ] - Bucky! 1250 01:08:50,707 --> 01:08:54,375 [ Howling ] Bucky, get your ass off her! Get down! 1251 01:08:54,375 --> 01:08:56,959 - [ Fiona Squealing ] - Oh, my God. 1252 01:08:56,959 --> 01:08:59,625 - Whoa! - [ Barking ] 1253 01:08:59,625 --> 01:09:02,250 She's so working him. 1254 01:09:02,250 --> 01:09:05,707 [ Barking Continues ] 1255 01:09:05,707 --> 01:09:08,959 Don't be surprised if he starts barkin' in tongues. 1256 01:09:08,959 --> 01:09:11,875 [ Growls ] 1257 01:09:11,875 --> 01:09:14,500 [ Fiona Squeals ] 1258 01:09:15,542 --> 01:09:18,625 [ Gasps ] Bucky done turned the bitch out. 1259 01:09:18,625 --> 01:09:22,250 [ Bucky Whines ] Phew. 1260 01:09:26,125 --> 01:09:29,332 [ Whining ] 1261 01:09:34,082 --> 01:09:37,750 Reg, not a word. I got you. 1262 01:09:37,750 --> 01:09:40,041 Is that plasma TV under warranty? 1263 01:09:41,625 --> 01:09:43,542 Mm-hmm. 1264 01:09:43,542 --> 01:09:48,707 I'm a steel trap, player. That dog gonna need counseling. 1265 01:09:51,542 --> 01:09:53,582 You gonna be all right? 1266 01:09:53,582 --> 01:09:56,041 Maybe she won't notice. 1267 01:09:59,083 --> 01:10:02,083 Whoo! Ah, baby. 1268 01:10:02,083 --> 01:10:04,667 Me and Fifi had so much fun out there, 1269 01:10:04,667 --> 01:10:06,625 we completely lost track of time. 1270 01:10:06,625 --> 01:10:09,000 Yeah. Daddy loves himself some Fifi. [ Whining ] 1271 01:10:09,000 --> 01:10:10,917 Ain't that right, Fifi? 1272 01:10:10,917 --> 01:10:13,708 [ Baby Talk ] Daddy love his little Fifi! Yeah! 1273 01:10:13,708 --> 01:10:16,291 We was runnin' all over the place, baby. 1274 01:10:16,291 --> 01:10:18,625 Yeah. She may need a bath. 1275 01:10:18,625 --> 01:10:21,542 She got dirty. Real dirty. 1276 01:10:21,542 --> 01:10:24,959 Now see here, buster. 1277 01:10:24,959 --> 01:10:27,417 Your alliance is with me, not the prom queen. 1278 01:10:27,417 --> 01:10:31,333 Come on, baby. There's no other alliance. 1279 01:10:31,333 --> 01:10:33,250 All right? 1280 01:10:33,250 --> 01:10:35,959 How 'bout you show me that "widdle" project? 1281 01:10:35,959 --> 01:10:40,333 I shaved off my "widdle" project. Why you do that? 1282 01:10:40,333 --> 01:10:42,792 If I discover there's mutiny afoot, 1283 01:10:42,792 --> 01:10:45,417 I'm gonna shave off your "widdle" project, understand? 1284 01:10:49,583 --> 01:10:51,458 Damn! 1285 01:10:51,458 --> 01:10:53,625 [ Both ] Damn! 1286 01:10:53,625 --> 01:10:56,542 [ Male Announcer ] One-timer! Kaberle. 1287 01:10:56,542 --> 01:10:58,708 Goal! [ Laughing ] 1288 01:10:58,708 --> 01:11:03,375 Aww, dang. You got game, nephew. That's all right. 1289 01:11:03,375 --> 01:11:05,333 Hey, Dad. 1290 01:11:05,333 --> 01:11:08,000 Roscoe Malley! What's up, man? 1291 01:11:08,000 --> 01:11:10,291 I heard you been runnin' around with my girl again. 1292 01:11:10,291 --> 01:11:14,000 [ Chuckles ] Come on, man. Let's play the game. 1293 01:11:14,000 --> 01:11:16,333 Me and Junior take on you and Jamaal. Yeah! 1294 01:11:16,333 --> 01:11:18,458 I don't play children's games. 1295 01:11:18,458 --> 01:11:20,166 Oh, is that right? 1296 01:11:20,166 --> 01:11:23,667 Then what's your poison, Brother? [ Dice Clacking ] 1297 01:11:23,667 --> 01:11:27,166 [ Chuckling ] You hear that though, huh? You like that, huh? 1298 01:11:27,166 --> 01:11:31,417 Yeah, I been dyin' to play a little click-clack. 1299 01:11:31,417 --> 01:11:34,000 Sure you want to take it there, Clyde? 1300 01:11:34,000 --> 01:11:36,125 'Cause I don't play for fun. 1301 01:11:36,125 --> 01:11:39,375 Ain't no fun losin' money. 1302 01:11:39,375 --> 01:11:42,041 Then you about to have a bad time. 1303 01:11:42,041 --> 01:11:46,708 - [ R.J. Groans ] - Oh, snap! Oh, that's gonna be all day right there. 1304 01:11:46,708 --> 01:11:48,166 - [ R.J. ] Can you handle it? - Moneymaker. 1305 01:11:48,166 --> 01:11:50,458 Daddy needs a new pair of gators. 1306 01:11:50,458 --> 01:11:52,125 Uh-uh. Watch this right there. 1307 01:11:52,125 --> 01:11:55,208 Talkin' about shake 'em up, shake 'em up, wake 'em. Oh! 1308 01:11:55,208 --> 01:11:57,959 - Yeah, Dad! - Daddy, yes! 1309 01:11:57,959 --> 01:12:00,458 You know what, man? I admire you. Yeah? 1310 01:12:00,458 --> 01:12:02,375 I admire you, Roscoe. 1311 01:12:02,375 --> 01:12:04,875 I mean, you still keep tryin'. 1312 01:12:04,875 --> 01:12:10,166 - You know, 'cause even when I lose, I win. - Ooh! 1313 01:12:10,166 --> 01:12:13,667 Then this must feel like the championship 'cause you're losin' the grip. 1314 01:12:13,667 --> 01:12:16,041 Bee-yatch! [ Laughing ] 1315 01:12:16,041 --> 01:12:18,583 [ Man ] ♪ Nobody ♪ 1316 01:12:18,583 --> 01:12:20,667 Yeah, put that right there. Come on, baby. Eat for Mama. 1317 01:12:20,667 --> 01:12:22,792 ♪ Don't stop the beat ♪ 1318 01:12:22,792 --> 01:12:26,041 Uh, Binata? You're not listenin'. 1319 01:12:26,041 --> 01:12:28,500 Now, I told you to take that dog out of my kitchen. 1320 01:12:28,500 --> 01:12:31,083 Just ain't sanitary. What's wrong with people? 1321 01:12:31,083 --> 01:12:35,583 Bring damn dogs up in folks's kitchen? Don't make no damn sense. 1322 01:12:35,583 --> 01:12:37,625 Oh! 1323 01:12:37,625 --> 01:12:41,208 That ain't nothin'. You ain't even slick with yours, so that's the problem. 1324 01:12:41,208 --> 01:12:44,959 Everybody see what you doin', man, but she's mine, Bro. 1325 01:12:44,959 --> 01:12:49,583 Yeah? Well, you might want to tell her that, 'cause she feelin' a brotha. 1326 01:12:49,583 --> 01:12:52,417 Seven again! [ Laughing ] 1327 01:12:52,417 --> 01:12:56,708 All right. Grease is hot. I need that fish. Thank you. 1328 01:12:56,708 --> 01:13:00,125 Mmm. It's a little sweet, but it's delicious. 1329 01:13:00,125 --> 01:13:04,333 Yes! And that wine of yours, baby, set it right off. 1330 01:13:04,333 --> 01:13:06,792 The '67 Margaux? Yeah! 1331 01:13:06,792 --> 01:13:10,208 That's a $600 bottle. And worth every penny! 1332 01:13:10,208 --> 01:13:13,250 ♪ Everybody, get on down ♪ Oh! Oh! 1333 01:13:13,250 --> 01:13:15,375 Seven again! 1334 01:13:15,375 --> 01:13:19,542 Oh! Somebody stop me! 1335 01:13:19,542 --> 01:13:22,667 [ Laughing ] Come on. Roll the dice, man. 1336 01:13:22,667 --> 01:13:25,917 - Oh, I get it. That's mine. That's mine. - Pass on that ass. 1337 01:13:25,917 --> 01:13:30,291 - Oh! Could it be? - No, no. No, no. 1338 01:13:30,291 --> 01:13:33,083 I call gator on that right there. Nigga, this ain't Monopoly. 1339 01:13:33,083 --> 01:13:36,333 Hey, hey, man. Roll again, Bro. 1340 01:13:37,667 --> 01:13:40,750 Clyde, you better un-ass me fore you find yourself a pinkie short. 1341 01:13:40,750 --> 01:13:43,834 You better roll again fore you find yourself an artery short. 1342 01:13:43,834 --> 01:13:46,250 [ Angry Shouting ] 1343 01:13:46,250 --> 01:13:49,125 You brought it on yourself! You brought it on yourself, Clyde! 1344 01:13:49,125 --> 01:13:52,375 - Let's go get some fish. - Okay. Come on, Jamaal. 1345 01:13:52,375 --> 01:13:55,250 This what you wanted, Clyde? This what you want? Yeah, that's what I want. 1346 01:13:55,250 --> 01:13:58,208 Get away from me. That's right! That's junior varsity right there, Bro! 1347 01:13:58,208 --> 01:13:59,917 [ Roaring ] 1348 01:13:59,917 --> 01:14:01,834 [ Screams, Grunting ] 1349 01:14:01,834 --> 01:14:04,125 Feel that? Oh, that's your ass right there. 1350 01:14:07,750 --> 01:14:10,166 [ Laughing ] [ Jamaal ] Wait! Wait. Stop! 1351 01:14:10,166 --> 01:14:12,667 Y'all gotta stop all that runnin' through my kitchen! 1352 01:14:12,667 --> 01:14:16,792 - [ Screaming ] - Got ya! Yeah! Oh, you broke Daddy's table! 1353 01:14:16,792 --> 01:14:19,750 We worked hard on this! [ Screams ] 1354 01:14:19,750 --> 01:14:21,625 That's 'cause you fixed it! 1355 01:14:21,625 --> 01:14:25,834 [ Laughing, Squealing ] 1356 01:14:28,125 --> 01:14:30,250 [ Shouts ] Go ahead and tell her. She asked you. 1357 01:14:30,250 --> 01:14:32,708 All right. I said why are you drinking when you're pregnant? 1358 01:14:32,708 --> 01:14:35,208 'Cause they said I could have a glass of wine. 1359 01:14:35,208 --> 01:14:38,000 Really? They didn't say how many times you could refill it though. 1360 01:14:38,000 --> 01:14:40,708 - I want to get pregnant. - How 'bout another one? 1361 01:14:40,708 --> 01:14:43,959 - Let's do it, Balolo! - Clyde-o-mania, baby! 1362 01:14:43,959 --> 01:14:46,166 [ Groaning ] 1363 01:14:46,166 --> 01:14:48,792 Yeah, you ended up with a big dog now, boy. 1364 01:14:48,792 --> 01:14:51,417 You're gonna kiss my dental records. [ Shouts ] 1365 01:14:53,834 --> 01:14:56,250 Lord, these fools been playin' dice. 1366 01:14:56,250 --> 01:14:58,917 - [ Clyde, R.J. Shouting ] - Hey! Knock it off! 1367 01:14:58,917 --> 01:15:01,792 Ladies, get the tartar sauce and the hot sauce... 1368 01:15:01,792 --> 01:15:04,542 'cause the Jenkins family is about to throw down! 1369 01:15:04,542 --> 01:15:07,708 - [ Shouting ] - [ Women Screaming ] 1370 01:15:07,708 --> 01:15:10,542 [ Growling ] 1371 01:15:10,542 --> 01:15:13,041 - Man, what y'all doing? - Stop that mess! 1372 01:15:14,166 --> 01:15:16,417 [ Screaming ] 1373 01:15:17,792 --> 01:15:20,458 [ Sizzling ] Aah! It's hot! It's hot! 1374 01:15:20,458 --> 01:15:23,542 - [ Screaming ] - [ Otis Shouting ] 1375 01:15:23,542 --> 01:15:25,917 [ Otis ] Oh, hell, no! [ Screaming ] 1376 01:15:25,917 --> 01:15:28,125 [ Ruthie ] Oh, my God. 1377 01:15:28,125 --> 01:15:30,291 [ Amy ] Are you okay? 1378 01:15:32,166 --> 01:15:35,875 Oh, my God! 1379 01:15:35,875 --> 01:15:37,959 [ Both ] He started it. 1380 01:15:37,959 --> 01:15:41,041 What they headin' for now? What they headin' for now? 1381 01:15:41,041 --> 01:15:45,500 Damn! Tsk. Boy, Mama. 1382 01:15:45,500 --> 01:15:49,083 You should've had more prenatal care. Look at your kids. 1383 01:15:50,333 --> 01:15:53,000 I'm sorry. 1384 01:15:53,000 --> 01:15:55,208 [ Whimpering ] 1385 01:15:55,208 --> 01:15:58,500 Baby, I'm sorry. It was an accident. 1386 01:15:58,500 --> 01:16:02,708 Silence. Shower. Strategy. That's all I need right now. 1387 01:16:02,708 --> 01:16:04,792 [ Knocking ] 1388 01:16:04,792 --> 01:16:07,750 Whoo! Boy, the shower's all yours. 1389 01:16:07,750 --> 01:16:10,083 [ Laughing ] 1390 01:16:10,083 --> 01:16:12,625 [ Whining ] You used all my shit! 1391 01:16:12,625 --> 01:16:16,000 - Yeah. What? - And you wearin' my robe? - What-- 1392 01:16:16,000 --> 01:16:18,625 - Man, you little-- - Bianca, how's Fiona doing? 1393 01:16:18,625 --> 01:16:21,917 - She still spooked by that snake? - What snake? 1394 01:16:21,917 --> 01:16:25,917 Oh! Shh-- The snake Lucinda saved Fifi from. 1395 01:16:26,875 --> 01:16:29,458 I mean, she seems pretty relaxed. 1396 01:16:29,458 --> 01:16:31,417 - That's probably because-- - Satellite! 1397 01:16:31,417 --> 01:16:33,625 Huh, 'Scoe? 1398 01:16:33,625 --> 01:16:37,250 Satellite, pay-per-view, premium channels, sports channels, platinum titty channels. 1399 01:16:37,250 --> 01:16:39,333 - All of that, man. - Playboy channels? 1400 01:16:39,333 --> 01:16:41,834 Yeah, butt-naked channels. You like butt-naked? 1401 01:16:41,834 --> 01:16:44,500 Oh, I got to have it. You like it when they butt-naked, 1402 01:16:44,500 --> 01:16:46,583 showin' all the ass? 1403 01:16:46,583 --> 01:16:49,000 You know it. Gospel channel? 1404 01:16:49,000 --> 01:16:51,667 - Yeah, you-- Gospel, all that! - Telemundo? 1405 01:16:51,667 --> 01:16:54,375 You like Telemundo? I like Telemun-- I like Spanish. 1406 01:16:54,375 --> 01:16:55,834 [ Mock Spanish ] All that! 1407 01:16:55,834 --> 01:16:59,792 All the-- ♪ Chung, cha-chung, cha-chung chung-chung ♪ 1408 01:16:59,792 --> 01:17:02,542 My man. Peace! 1409 01:17:02,542 --> 01:17:05,125 [ Growls ] 1410 01:17:05,125 --> 01:17:07,500 - [ Door Closes ] - [ Gulps ] 1411 01:17:07,500 --> 01:17:11,708 I don't know who you are anymore, Roscoe Jenkins. 1412 01:17:11,708 --> 01:17:13,875 Baby, it's me. 1413 01:17:13,875 --> 01:17:15,583 It's R.J. 1414 01:17:15,583 --> 01:17:19,542 Are you really willing to put your career, your future, 1415 01:17:19,542 --> 01:17:21,625 in jeopardy over a crush? 1416 01:17:21,625 --> 01:17:25,000 Career? Baby, we're getting married. 1417 01:17:25,000 --> 01:17:27,333 Get your priorities in order... 1418 01:17:27,333 --> 01:17:30,542 and decide what and who you really want. 1419 01:17:30,542 --> 01:17:33,250 Let that simmer while you sleep on the couch tonight. 1420 01:17:33,250 --> 01:17:35,834 We're gonna take a shower. 1421 01:17:37,417 --> 01:17:39,875 [ Water Running ] 1422 01:17:43,208 --> 01:17:45,500 Ooh. 1423 01:17:46,959 --> 01:17:49,041 Ooh. 1424 01:18:01,417 --> 01:18:03,708 - Reggie! - [ Screams ] Hell, no! 1425 01:18:03,708 --> 01:18:06,583 - Get your nasty ass outta here! - I didn't know that was you. 1426 01:18:06,583 --> 01:18:09,542 You knew I was in here! You's a nasty, common freak! 1427 01:18:09,542 --> 01:18:12,667 There's a naked linebacker in our shower right now. 1428 01:18:12,667 --> 01:18:16,083 You brought that little white gal up in here, and now you tryin' to see some black meat? 1429 01:18:16,083 --> 01:18:19,083 Girl, I didn't try to come in here and look at you. 1430 01:18:19,083 --> 01:18:20,750 Well, then hand me my feminine wash. 1431 01:18:20,750 --> 01:18:23,333 I can see why you can't keep a man now. 1432 01:18:23,333 --> 01:18:26,959 You got to lay off them Milky Ways and Doritos and "tor-till-oh" chips. 1433 01:18:26,959 --> 01:18:29,917 And your mother shouldn't have taken them goddamn drugs when she was pregnant with you! 1434 01:18:29,917 --> 01:18:33,583 - That's what's wrong with your black ass! - God, your titties are huge! 1435 01:18:33,583 --> 01:18:38,458 Look, I'm-a tell Daddy. I'm-a tell my daddy that you are in here tryin' to see my treats. 1436 01:18:38,458 --> 01:18:40,625 Wait. You gonna be lyin' if you tell him that. 1437 01:18:40,625 --> 01:18:42,875 Then what was you doin' in here? I thought that-- 1438 01:18:42,875 --> 01:18:45,417 Can I just give you this bubble gum and get on outta here? 1439 01:18:45,417 --> 01:18:47,458 You wanted Chick-fil-A, that's what you got. 1440 01:18:47,458 --> 01:18:50,959 I'm Burger King. I'm a Double Whopper. You wanna see this dark meat? 1441 01:18:50,959 --> 01:18:53,625 I don't play that foolishness, you sick-- 1442 01:18:53,625 --> 01:18:56,291 I do want to see the-- the black meat, 1443 01:18:56,291 --> 01:18:59,708 but I don't want to see... a bundle of it. 1444 01:18:59,708 --> 01:19:03,667 Get outta here, you sick, nasty bastard! 1445 01:19:05,000 --> 01:19:07,625 [ R.J. ] She gonna put me out of my room. 1446 01:19:07,625 --> 01:19:12,834 She's a survivor. I'm a survivor. Kiribati, my ass. 1447 01:19:13,667 --> 01:19:16,875 Good night, vegan. [ Laughing ] 1448 01:19:16,875 --> 01:19:18,959 Finally, 1449 01:19:18,959 --> 01:19:22,250 peace at last. 1450 01:19:22,250 --> 01:19:25,792 [ Snoring ] 1451 01:19:28,125 --> 01:19:30,041 Bucky. 1452 01:19:36,792 --> 01:19:40,000 You little stinky dog. Bu-- Bucky! 1453 01:19:40,000 --> 01:19:42,667 Oh, hell, no! 1454 01:19:42,667 --> 01:19:47,000 [ Screaming ] 1455 01:19:47,000 --> 01:19:50,458 He done pissed in my eyes! [ Screams ] It sting! 1456 01:19:50,458 --> 01:19:52,500 My eyes! It burns! 1457 01:19:52,500 --> 01:19:55,208 Aah! Oh, Lord! Oh! 1458 01:19:55,208 --> 01:19:59,917 [ Screams, Groans ] 1459 01:19:59,917 --> 01:20:01,959 It sting. 1460 01:20:01,959 --> 01:20:05,875 It sting. My eyes are burnin'. It got in my mouth. 1461 01:20:05,875 --> 01:20:07,834 They burnin'! 1462 01:20:07,834 --> 01:20:10,834 Where did I go wrong with that boy? 1463 01:20:12,083 --> 01:20:16,291 Mama! Mama! Mama! 1464 01:20:16,291 --> 01:20:18,000 Lord have mercy. 1465 01:20:18,000 --> 01:20:20,834 Mama! [ Groans ] 1466 01:20:21,834 --> 01:20:25,125 [ Spraying ] Ooh. 1467 01:20:25,125 --> 01:20:27,542 I don't-- I don't know what that is. 1468 01:20:27,542 --> 01:20:30,333 [ Woman ] Hell, no, that ain't me. What the-- 1469 01:20:30,333 --> 01:20:33,083 [ Spraying Continues ] 1470 01:20:37,166 --> 01:20:40,166 Whoa, baby brother. Ease up, man. You got my eyes tearin'. 1471 01:20:40,166 --> 01:20:42,250 My skin is all itchy. [ Gasps ] 1472 01:20:42,250 --> 01:20:44,208 Don't do that, man. 1473 01:20:44,208 --> 01:20:46,417 Smell like garbage truck juice out here. 1474 01:20:46,417 --> 01:20:48,375 [ Papa Jenkins ] Today... 1475 01:20:48,375 --> 01:20:51,708 you all continue the Dry Springs... 1476 01:20:51,708 --> 01:20:54,667 obstacle course tradition. 1477 01:20:54,667 --> 01:20:57,250 So get out there and display... 1478 01:20:57,250 --> 01:21:01,041 that Jenkins family athletic prowess! [ Murmuring Agreement ] 1479 01:21:01,041 --> 01:21:04,792 And no matter what, have fun. 1480 01:21:04,792 --> 01:21:07,708 [ Cheering ] 1481 01:21:10,834 --> 01:21:13,417 Good luck, young man. 1482 01:21:13,417 --> 01:21:16,458 Win something, okay? Have fun. Go on. Have a good time. 1483 01:21:17,792 --> 01:21:21,708 Jamaal. Nobody remembers who came in second, okay? 1484 01:21:21,708 --> 01:21:24,166 So you gotta get pumped, right? 1485 01:21:24,166 --> 01:21:25,875 Loosen up. 1486 01:21:25,875 --> 01:21:29,375 Loosen up your muscles. Come on. Loosen up! Come on! Come on! 1487 01:21:29,375 --> 01:21:33,583 Win! Win! We're winners. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Ease up now, Kiribati. 1488 01:21:33,583 --> 01:21:36,959 Jamaal, go. This ain't none of your business, Clyde. 1489 01:21:36,959 --> 01:21:38,875 Come on, man. This is just kids havin' fun. 1490 01:21:38,875 --> 01:21:41,583 It ain't no fun gettin' beat. You should know that, Cadillac Man. 1491 01:21:41,583 --> 01:21:45,166 That was one time! Even a blind squirrel can find a nut. 1492 01:21:45,166 --> 01:21:49,625 Who you calling a squirrel? "Who you calling a squirrel?" Roscoe. 1493 01:21:49,625 --> 01:21:53,083 That's who. A blind, stink-ass squirrel. 1494 01:21:53,083 --> 01:21:55,542 And you the nut, Koo-koo. 1495 01:21:55,542 --> 01:21:59,625 Hey, leave my lady outta this. I know you're not calling my victory a fluke. 1496 01:21:59,625 --> 01:22:01,625 Oh. Fluke, luck, one-in-a-million shot. Yeah. 1497 01:22:01,625 --> 01:22:04,625 Well, bring it on, Clyde. We can do this right here, right now. 1498 01:22:04,625 --> 01:22:06,917 You owe me two marbles! All right. Stop it. 1499 01:22:06,917 --> 01:22:09,834 He's always been a loser. He's always gonna be a loser. 1500 01:22:09,834 --> 01:22:11,583 [ All Arguing ] 1501 01:22:11,583 --> 01:22:14,083 Hey, Daddy! Daddy! You hear these fools? 1502 01:22:14,083 --> 01:22:16,333 I'm gonna arrest 'em! That's what I'm gonna do! 1503 01:22:16,333 --> 01:22:19,625 - I was state champion! - [ Papa Jenkins ] Hey-oh, hey! 1504 01:22:19,625 --> 01:22:22,417 You two been at this for 20 years. 1505 01:22:22,417 --> 01:22:26,000 Go ahead. Knock yourselves out. Starting line, 10 minutes. 1506 01:22:26,000 --> 01:22:28,834 Oh, yeah? Yeah, Daddy! Yeah! Oh! Ten minutes? 1507 01:22:28,834 --> 01:22:32,166 Starting line, 10 minutes, Clyde! Ten minutes, Clyde. 1508 01:22:32,166 --> 01:22:34,208 It's on! Ten minutes! Get him! 1509 01:22:34,208 --> 01:22:38,417 Ten minutes to countdown, baby! Gunfight at the O.K. Corral! 1510 01:22:38,417 --> 01:22:41,041 Aw, shoot. It's the Negro Olympics! 1511 01:22:43,834 --> 01:22:46,417 [ Bones Cracking ] 1512 01:22:46,417 --> 01:22:50,875 [ Grunting ] 1513 01:22:59,500 --> 01:23:01,834 Dad, are you sure about this? Focus, Son. 1514 01:23:01,834 --> 01:23:04,542 Concentrate. 1515 01:23:04,542 --> 01:23:08,792 Cut me in or cut it out. Clyde is favored to do the job. 1516 01:23:08,792 --> 01:23:11,542 Good luck, 'Scoe. That's right. Who gonna bet? 1517 01:23:11,542 --> 01:23:15,375 Y'all better strap yourselves in 'cause this here's gonna be funny! 1518 01:23:15,375 --> 01:23:17,208 Hey, Reggie! Let me get some of that action! 1519 01:23:17,208 --> 01:23:21,708 I got a pulled hamstring for Clyde and a back spasm for Roscoe. 1520 01:23:21,708 --> 01:23:25,166 R.J.'s in top shape. Your man? No shape. 1521 01:23:25,166 --> 01:23:27,458 Clyde is not my man. We are just-- 1522 01:23:27,458 --> 01:23:30,250 Just friends. Yeah. Like you and R.J.? 1523 01:23:30,250 --> 01:23:33,166 What are you talking about? 1524 01:23:33,166 --> 01:23:36,708 I've been watching you, trying to win favor with Jamaal, 1525 01:23:36,708 --> 01:23:38,750 realizing what you missed out on. 1526 01:23:38,750 --> 01:23:41,708 It's pathetic, and you're too late... 1527 01:23:41,708 --> 01:23:45,041 because there are no second chances for washed-up prom queens. 1528 01:23:45,041 --> 01:23:49,417 I'm sorry. Oh! That was painful. You a bad bitch. You bad. 1529 01:23:49,417 --> 01:23:51,708 A bad bitch, Betty? Please. Okay. 1530 01:23:51,708 --> 01:23:54,583 She is a fake celebrity, all right? 1531 01:23:54,583 --> 01:23:57,667 Her only claim to fame is trading her panties for peanut butter. 1532 01:23:57,667 --> 01:24:00,250 That's some nasty shit there. 1533 01:24:00,250 --> 01:24:04,834 News flash, honey. Those panties went for 20 grand on line. 1534 01:24:04,834 --> 01:24:07,208 Wait a minute. Twenty grand for your panties? Yes. 1535 01:24:07,208 --> 01:24:10,792 Well, I got some panties. Okay? I got the good panties. 1536 01:24:10,792 --> 01:24:13,834 I got the thong panties. I got the period panties. 1537 01:24:13,834 --> 01:24:16,625 They might go for-- Betty. I got a news flash for you. 1538 01:24:16,625 --> 01:24:19,291 Mm-hmm? Bucky boned Fifi. 1539 01:24:19,291 --> 01:24:21,708 Oh, Lord. Well. 1540 01:24:21,708 --> 01:24:23,875 - Did he kill her? - She was on top. 1541 01:24:23,875 --> 01:24:25,583 [ Gasps ] [ Betty ] The "Pomegramian?" 1542 01:24:25,583 --> 01:24:27,959 [ Lucinda ] Now, that is a bad bitch. [ Betty ] Oh, my God. 1543 01:24:27,959 --> 01:24:30,333 - Fifi! - Your dog's a whore. 1544 01:24:30,333 --> 01:24:32,458 All right. 1545 01:24:32,458 --> 01:24:34,542 On your mark. 1546 01:24:34,542 --> 01:24:37,417 Get set. 1547 01:24:38,708 --> 01:24:41,667 - [ Cheering ] - Come on, baby! 1548 01:24:42,583 --> 01:24:46,125 - [ Grunting ] - Get away from me! 1549 01:24:46,125 --> 01:24:48,834 What is wrong with them? 1550 01:24:48,834 --> 01:24:51,083 [ Fast Grunting ] 1551 01:24:51,083 --> 01:24:53,083 [ Gasping ] 1552 01:24:53,083 --> 01:24:56,625 - ♪ Just no time to stop and get away ♪ - [ All Shouting ] 1553 01:24:56,625 --> 01:24:59,834 ♪ 'Cause I work so hard to make it every day ♪ 1554 01:24:59,834 --> 01:25:02,625 Oh, get back! Don't want nothin'-- Get back, sucka! 1555 01:25:02,625 --> 01:25:04,875 Watch out! Hell, I've got it! 1556 01:25:04,875 --> 01:25:08,792 I've got it! Move! 1557 01:25:08,792 --> 01:25:11,834 Oh, no! Share that! Share that! 1558 01:25:11,834 --> 01:25:14,792 [ Both Screaming ] 1559 01:25:14,792 --> 01:25:18,041 - ♪ There's no money fallin' from the sky ♪ - Oh! 1560 01:25:19,417 --> 01:25:22,458 ♪ 'Cause a man took my heart and robbed me blind ♪ 1561 01:25:22,458 --> 01:25:24,500 Redemption! Redemption! 1562 01:25:24,500 --> 01:25:27,000 Oh, no! Oh, no! Boogie! 1563 01:25:27,000 --> 01:25:30,417 You gotta go, Rasta boy! [ Grunts ] 1564 01:25:30,417 --> 01:25:32,625 - [ Giggling ] - Hey! 1565 01:25:32,625 --> 01:25:35,125 [ Screaming ] Oh, yes. 1566 01:25:35,125 --> 01:25:39,083 I'm up. I'm up. [ Roaring ] 1567 01:25:39,083 --> 01:25:41,166 - Oh, no. Uh-uh. - Letting go. 1568 01:25:41,166 --> 01:25:43,125 Cannonball! 1569 01:25:43,125 --> 01:25:44,417 Oh, shit! 1570 01:25:45,708 --> 01:25:47,375 Oh, shit! 1571 01:25:47,375 --> 01:25:49,291 [ Groaning ] Oh, yeah. Here we go. 1572 01:25:49,291 --> 01:25:51,834 No. 1573 01:25:51,834 --> 01:25:53,959 [ Roaring ] 1574 01:25:53,959 --> 01:25:56,417 Hit the floor, baby. G.I. Joe! 1575 01:25:56,417 --> 01:25:59,458 Navy SEAL! Navy SEAL. 1576 01:25:59,458 --> 01:26:02,834 Slip-and-slide Clyde! 1577 01:26:02,834 --> 01:26:04,959 [ Screaming ] 1578 01:26:04,959 --> 01:26:08,542 Try South Beach Diet, fat ass! 1579 01:26:08,542 --> 01:26:11,500 [ Growling, Triumphant Laughing ] 1580 01:26:14,750 --> 01:26:17,083 - Come on, baby! - No, you don't! 1581 01:26:17,083 --> 01:26:20,166 - Hey! - Oh, hell, no. No! 1582 01:26:20,166 --> 01:26:23,041 [ Growling, Laughing ] 1583 01:26:24,250 --> 01:26:29,000 - [ All Groaning ] - [ High-pitched Whining ] 1584 01:26:29,000 --> 01:26:30,750 Man, I felt that in my stomach. 1585 01:26:30,750 --> 01:26:34,583 [ Groaning, Shouts ] 1586 01:26:34,583 --> 01:26:38,542 [ Otis ] Come on, baby. Let's go. No! No! 1587 01:26:38,542 --> 01:26:41,291 Hold up. [ Screaming ] 1588 01:26:42,041 --> 01:26:45,542 No. Wait! [ Screaming ] 1589 01:26:45,542 --> 01:26:48,708 Sorry, Dad! [ R.J. ] You-- You wait. You-- 1590 01:26:48,708 --> 01:26:53,083 - [ Screaming ] - Hold on, baby. Hold on! 1591 01:26:53,083 --> 01:26:57,041 ♪ I'm just burnin' doin' the Neutron Dance ♪ 1592 01:26:57,041 --> 01:26:59,041 - Oh! - [ Giggling ] 1593 01:26:59,041 --> 01:27:03,792 - [ Laughter ] - That's all right, baby! 1594 01:27:03,792 --> 01:27:07,333 - Let's go, Jamaal! - Whoo! Yeah! 1595 01:27:07,333 --> 01:27:09,500 Whoa! No! 1596 01:27:09,500 --> 01:27:12,458 [ Frightened Grunting ] It's your ass, boy! 1597 01:27:12,458 --> 01:27:14,458 ♪ I'm just burnin' ♪ 1598 01:27:14,458 --> 01:27:17,959 - Oh, I got you now. See you at the finish line, boy. - No! 1599 01:27:17,959 --> 01:27:21,417 - Get up, baby! Get up! - [ Growls ] 1600 01:27:22,291 --> 01:27:24,792 [ Laughs ] Yes! You see that? 1601 01:27:24,792 --> 01:27:27,417 Upper-body strength. That's what bein' in the gym will do for you! 1602 01:27:27,417 --> 01:27:31,125 Well, I'm a power runner. True warrior. Man, I ain't never scared! 1603 01:27:31,125 --> 01:27:33,125 Yeah. Me neither. 1604 01:27:33,125 --> 01:27:36,458 [ Both Screaming ] 1605 01:27:38,000 --> 01:27:41,834 - I'm gonna die! I'm gonna die! - Mama! 1606 01:27:43,417 --> 01:27:46,708 - I'm gonna die! - [ Grunting ] 1607 01:27:46,708 --> 01:27:49,750 - [ Groans ] - [ All Groaning ] 1608 01:27:49,750 --> 01:27:52,333 - ♪ Doin' the Neutron Dance ♪ - [ Betty ] Clyde, go! 1609 01:27:53,917 --> 01:27:57,375 - ♪ I'm just burnin' doin' the Neutron Dance ♪ - Go, R.J.! Get him! 1610 01:27:57,375 --> 01:28:01,000 ♪ I know there's a pot of gold for me ♪ 1611 01:28:02,333 --> 01:28:06,750 - ♪ All I got to do is just believe ♪ - Help me, Dad. 1612 01:28:06,750 --> 01:28:09,667 Come on! Dig in! Come on! I can't. 1613 01:28:09,667 --> 01:28:12,166 Help! Dad! Come on, Son. 1614 01:28:12,166 --> 01:28:15,000 Come on, come on. You can do it. 1615 01:28:16,000 --> 01:28:19,166 Oh! [ Grunts ] Come on! 1616 01:28:19,166 --> 01:28:22,500 Come on. Come on, Son. Go! 1617 01:28:22,500 --> 01:28:24,375 [ Jamaal ] I'm tryin! 1618 01:28:24,375 --> 01:28:26,875 Dig in, Son. Dig. 1619 01:28:26,875 --> 01:28:29,375 Hurry up. Dig in! Go! 1620 01:28:29,375 --> 01:28:34,166 Leave him, baby! Leave him! Don't let Clyde beat you! Don't let him win! 1621 01:28:34,166 --> 01:28:36,125 [ Grunts ] [ Bianca ] Win, R.J., win! 1622 01:28:36,125 --> 01:28:38,750 - [ Both ] What? - [ Bianca ] Go, go, go! 1623 01:28:38,750 --> 01:28:41,375 [ Grunting ] Don't give up, Son. 1624 01:28:41,375 --> 01:28:43,500 Don't give up! 1625 01:28:43,500 --> 01:28:45,667 [ Bianca ] Go, go, go! 1626 01:28:47,458 --> 01:28:50,291 - Go, baby, go! - [ Roaring ] 1627 01:28:50,291 --> 01:28:52,583 [ Screaming ] 1628 01:28:53,542 --> 01:28:56,125 Watch out! [ Grunts ] 1629 01:28:56,125 --> 01:28:58,834 No, no, baby. Whoa, babe, babe. That's all right. No. 1630 01:28:58,834 --> 01:29:00,959 This is just a mess. 1631 01:29:00,959 --> 01:29:04,625 Oh, yeah, sucka! [ Maniacal Laughing ] 1632 01:29:04,625 --> 01:29:07,417 Oh, no! Hell, no! Hell, no! 1633 01:29:07,417 --> 01:29:10,166 [ Shouting ] 1634 01:29:10,166 --> 01:29:11,917 [ Shouting ] 1635 01:29:11,917 --> 01:29:15,875 [ Shouts ] Oh, no, you don't! No, you don't! 1636 01:29:26,959 --> 01:29:29,375 Yeah! Yes! 1637 01:29:29,375 --> 01:29:32,750 Yeah! Welcome to the top, winner! 1638 01:29:32,750 --> 01:29:36,708 [ Roaring ] Yes! 1639 01:29:36,708 --> 01:29:39,583 Give it up, Clyde. I still got it. 1640 01:29:39,583 --> 01:29:42,458 This is gonna haunt your dreams for the next 20 years. 1641 01:29:42,458 --> 01:29:44,583 - Yeah. - Loser! 1642 01:29:44,583 --> 01:29:47,792 Callie! Ah, built for comfort, not for speed. 1643 01:29:47,792 --> 01:29:52,333 Hey, good save, Steroid Stan! Good save, boy. 1644 01:29:52,333 --> 01:29:55,917 But you know what? Too bad this ain't a team competition. 1645 01:29:55,917 --> 01:29:58,041 You know why? 'Cause I'm the leader! 1646 01:29:58,041 --> 01:30:01,417 Yes! Captain of the Team of Me! 1647 01:30:01,417 --> 01:30:05,375 Just me! Just me, baby! Just me! 1648 01:30:05,375 --> 01:30:07,500 Yeah! Oh. 1649 01:30:10,750 --> 01:30:14,667 - Come here, Son. - No, thanks. 1650 01:30:14,667 --> 01:30:16,750 Jamaal! 1651 01:30:16,750 --> 01:30:19,333 Jamaal! 1652 01:30:20,458 --> 01:30:22,792 Jamaal. Jamaal! 1653 01:30:22,792 --> 01:30:24,917 What in God's name is wrong with you? What? 1654 01:30:24,917 --> 01:30:28,333 He challenged me, Daddy, so I stepped to the plate. 1655 01:30:28,333 --> 01:30:30,333 What was I supposed to do, back down? 1656 01:30:30,333 --> 01:30:32,792 Hey, don't use that tone with me! 1657 01:30:32,792 --> 01:30:35,542 Show some damn respect. Where's my respect, Daddy? 1658 01:30:35,542 --> 01:30:39,208 Damn! You've never given me credit for nothin' I done! 1659 01:30:39,208 --> 01:30:42,667 Credit for what? Winning a child's race? 1660 01:30:42,667 --> 01:30:46,792 Buying some fancy TV? Or that bullshit show of yours? 1661 01:30:46,792 --> 01:30:50,834 Yes! Yes, Daddy, yes! Give me some credit! 1662 01:30:50,834 --> 01:30:52,792 Show me some damn credit! 1663 01:30:52,792 --> 01:30:56,041 Then I feel very sorry for you. 1664 01:30:56,041 --> 01:30:59,375 So Clyde gets off easy again. 1665 01:31:01,208 --> 01:31:04,083 It wasn't just me out there, Daddy. 1666 01:31:05,834 --> 01:31:08,959 I know he lost his father, but why did I have to lose mine too? 1667 01:31:08,959 --> 01:31:11,166 Why, Daddy? 1668 01:31:18,792 --> 01:31:23,750 Well, now I see why you stayed away for nine years. 1669 01:31:30,458 --> 01:31:32,500 [ Reggie ] Mmm-mmm-mmm. 1670 01:31:35,959 --> 01:31:39,000 Let's go. 1671 01:31:43,375 --> 01:31:46,417 Hey. Hey, Roscoe. 1672 01:31:46,417 --> 01:31:50,375 Look, man, I never tried to take your place. 1673 01:31:50,375 --> 01:31:52,500 I was just tryin' to fit in. 1674 01:31:52,500 --> 01:31:54,792 See, even though we cousins, 1675 01:31:54,792 --> 01:31:56,875 you my brother, man. 1676 01:32:06,625 --> 01:32:09,166 Oh, now you're Mr. Innocent? Please! 1677 01:32:09,166 --> 01:32:12,291 Don't fall for it, honey. He's just tryin' to suck you in. 1678 01:32:12,291 --> 01:32:14,959 Oh, look, heifer, your narrow ass about to get sucked in-- 1679 01:32:14,959 --> 01:32:17,125 Don't do this. You got a case. 1680 01:32:17,125 --> 01:32:19,667 I will cut you. You got a case pending. 1681 01:32:19,667 --> 01:32:22,750 - You know what? We're goin'. We're goin'. - I'm not afraid of her. 1682 01:32:22,750 --> 01:32:25,917 You need to be afraid of her. You don't watch Wild Kingdom? 1683 01:32:25,917 --> 01:32:28,834 You ain't never seen a lion attack a gazelle? 1684 01:32:28,834 --> 01:32:31,667 She about to smack the Cover Girl off your face. Better get up outta here. 1685 01:32:31,667 --> 01:32:34,959 'Scoe. 'Scoe. Hey, look. 1686 01:32:34,959 --> 01:32:38,125 Let him go. Let him go. Get off of me, Reggie. 1687 01:32:38,125 --> 01:32:41,458 Come on, baby. [ Betty ] I can see your spine. 1688 01:32:41,458 --> 01:32:43,333 Look at that snake. 1689 01:32:43,333 --> 01:32:47,625 It was so good to see you, Jamaal. Yeah. 1690 01:32:47,625 --> 01:32:51,792 Don't you forget to stay in touch with your grandma and grandpa, you hear? 1691 01:32:51,792 --> 01:32:55,375 I will. Thanks, Mama Jenkins. Mmm. 1692 01:32:55,375 --> 01:32:59,375 Well, here's somethin' for the road. 1693 01:32:59,375 --> 01:33:02,000 Meat loaf. Your favorite. Thanks, Mama. 1694 01:33:02,000 --> 01:33:06,542 Oh, I just hate to see you go, but I understand. 1695 01:33:06,542 --> 01:33:09,458 Lord have mercy, I understand. 1696 01:33:11,375 --> 01:33:16,083 Just don't let it be another nine years, okay? 1697 01:33:16,083 --> 01:33:19,041 Promise? Yeah. 1698 01:33:24,333 --> 01:33:26,750 We love you. 1699 01:33:26,750 --> 01:33:30,500 [ Sniffs ] I love you too, Mama. 1700 01:33:34,583 --> 01:33:37,792 [ Car Engine Starts ] 1701 01:33:48,000 --> 01:33:50,083 [ Bianca ] Honey, don't be sad. 1702 01:33:50,083 --> 01:33:52,250 I'm sorry things didn't work out. 1703 01:33:52,250 --> 01:33:55,458 I promise, we'll fix this together. 1704 01:33:55,458 --> 01:33:57,875 I hope so, baby. 1705 01:33:57,875 --> 01:34:00,542 We'll come up with a new plan. 1706 01:34:00,542 --> 01:34:03,041 Yeah, we have more time to work on the speech. 1707 01:34:03,041 --> 01:34:06,542 We'll film the banquet in L.A., hire actors. 1708 01:34:06,542 --> 01:34:08,583 It'll look better. 1709 01:34:08,583 --> 01:34:12,375 Hire actors, to play my family? Honey. 1710 01:34:12,375 --> 01:34:14,667 We're getting married... 1711 01:34:14,667 --> 01:34:18,041 and forming a powerful merger. 1712 01:34:18,041 --> 01:34:20,333 Where does your family fit into that? 1713 01:34:20,333 --> 01:34:22,583 I guess they don't. 1714 01:34:22,583 --> 01:34:24,834 Dad, are you serious? Jamaal! 1715 01:34:24,834 --> 01:34:29,208 Haven't you realized by now who your father's become? Hmm? 1716 01:34:29,208 --> 01:34:32,041 It's all about the Team of Me. 1717 01:34:32,041 --> 01:34:34,917 This is Team Stevens, and you need to get on board. 1718 01:34:34,917 --> 01:34:37,291 I'm a Jenkins. 1719 01:34:37,291 --> 01:34:39,750 R.J., please talk to your son. 1720 01:34:42,625 --> 01:34:44,875 [ Sighs ] 1721 01:34:45,875 --> 01:34:47,834 She's right, Jamaal. 1722 01:34:47,834 --> 01:34:51,083 - We gotta move forward, all right? - Mm-hmm. 1723 01:34:51,083 --> 01:34:53,375 You think just because you bonded with everybody, 1724 01:34:53,375 --> 01:34:57,375 I'm-a send you down here for summers and Christmases-- [ Chuckles ] 1725 01:34:57,375 --> 01:34:59,458 so you can be influenced by these people? 1726 01:34:59,458 --> 01:35:01,500 - But-- But, Dad! - No "buts," Jamaal. 1727 01:35:01,500 --> 01:35:04,083 In fact, you know, let's not even invite them to the wedding. 1728 01:35:04,083 --> 01:35:09,000 [ Gasps ] Oh, my God! I'm so glad you said that! 1729 01:35:09,000 --> 01:35:11,917 I've been thinking that ever since I met Betty. 1730 01:35:11,917 --> 01:35:15,250 I don't blame you. Bitch ain't got no class. 1731 01:35:15,250 --> 01:35:18,083 You can say that again. 1732 01:35:19,625 --> 01:35:22,583 [ Chuckling ] "No class." 1733 01:35:22,583 --> 01:35:25,708 Ha. We can say that about a few people in your family. 1734 01:35:25,708 --> 01:35:30,083 Right, baby? Right? [ Laughs ] 1735 01:35:33,708 --> 01:35:36,792 Honey, you are so doing the right thing... 1736 01:35:36,792 --> 01:35:39,583 and making me so hot in the process. 1737 01:35:39,583 --> 01:35:41,333 Oh, yeah? Yeah. 1738 01:35:41,333 --> 01:35:44,917 Well, prepare to cool off 'cause I'm done with you, 1739 01:35:44,917 --> 01:35:47,375 you crazy-ass bee-yatch! 1740 01:35:47,375 --> 01:35:49,792 You know what? Thank you, Bianca. 1741 01:35:49,792 --> 01:35:53,583 Thank you so much for lettin' me finally see you... 1742 01:35:53,583 --> 01:35:55,291 for the arrogant, sex-crazed, 1743 01:35:55,291 --> 01:35:59,750 pretentious fake-ass celebrity wannabe that you are. 1744 01:35:59,750 --> 01:36:02,333 [ Gasps ] Thank you, Bianca. Thank you. 1745 01:36:02,333 --> 01:36:06,208 [ Chuckles ] Oh, well, you're so welcome, Roscoe! 1746 01:36:06,208 --> 01:36:09,667 I knew it. You can't handle me. You're not man enough. 1747 01:36:09,667 --> 01:36:12,500 You don't have the balls! 1748 01:36:12,500 --> 01:36:16,166 King Kong don't have the balls! Bounce! 1749 01:36:16,166 --> 01:36:20,250 You just signed your career death certificate. [ Giggles ] 1750 01:36:20,250 --> 01:36:23,375 Our alliance is officially over, and so are you. 1751 01:36:23,375 --> 01:36:26,333 - Come on, Fiona. - [ Whines ] 1752 01:36:26,333 --> 01:36:29,792 - Come on, Fifi. Come to Mommy. - [ Barks ] 1753 01:36:29,792 --> 01:36:32,125 Ah! It looks like your alliance is over... 1754 01:36:32,125 --> 01:36:35,500 and you've been voted off the island. 1755 01:36:35,500 --> 01:36:39,750 Bianca, the tribe has spoken. Bounce. [ Fifi Barking ] 1756 01:36:39,750 --> 01:36:42,583 [ Screams, Grunts ] 1757 01:36:42,583 --> 01:36:45,000 Dad, you're the man! 1758 01:36:45,000 --> 01:36:48,166 I told you who the boss was. Huh? 1759 01:36:48,166 --> 01:36:50,333 Let's go. 1760 01:36:51,250 --> 01:36:54,000 Wait! My bags! 1761 01:37:02,417 --> 01:37:05,375 I love you, Son. I love you too, Dad. 1762 01:37:05,375 --> 01:37:07,333 Let's go home. 1763 01:37:07,333 --> 01:37:11,375 [ Applause ] 1764 01:37:11,375 --> 01:37:15,083 Mama said, "Girl, it ain't right... 1765 01:37:15,083 --> 01:37:18,750 to throw hot grits on a man when you have a disagreement." 1766 01:37:18,750 --> 01:37:22,625 Sound advice, real good advice, but did I listen? 1767 01:37:22,625 --> 01:37:27,667 No. Old Betty had to do it her way, and that was my second husband. 1768 01:37:27,667 --> 01:37:29,792 God knows I didn't mean to burn him. 1769 01:37:29,792 --> 01:37:33,083 But my third husband, Buck-- Baby, Buck was good to me. 1770 01:37:33,083 --> 01:37:36,333 And any time you get somebody that's good to you like that, you love 'em. 1771 01:37:36,333 --> 01:37:39,750 Big, uh-- Big black Buck had the keloid hanging from his ear. Looked-- 1772 01:37:39,750 --> 01:37:42,542 Eww! Stop! Looked like he had a leather hearing aid. 1773 01:37:42,542 --> 01:37:44,500 Daddy, I know you didn't like Buck a lot, 1774 01:37:44,500 --> 01:37:47,083 but Buck was a good man when he got out of jail. 1775 01:37:47,083 --> 01:37:50,166 I'm-a tell you somethin'-- He did everything he said he was gonna do. 1776 01:37:50,166 --> 01:37:54,834 And do you know, Buck was the only man that could pick me up? 1777 01:37:54,834 --> 01:37:58,917 Baby, y'all don't know what it's like for a man to scoop you up like that-- 1778 01:37:58,917 --> 01:38:01,625 Betty-- I'm tryin' to tell 'em! Scoop you like-- 1779 01:38:01,625 --> 01:38:05,667 - Betty. - Get off of me! I'm not finished! 1780 01:38:05,667 --> 01:38:08,959 You a hater. I ain't no hater. We only got five hours to be here. 1781 01:38:08,959 --> 01:38:10,792 Shut up! 1782 01:38:10,792 --> 01:38:15,250 Thank you, Betty. Thank you! Yeah! 1783 01:38:16,458 --> 01:38:20,000 And now, for our next testimonial, it'll come from Clyde. 1784 01:38:25,625 --> 01:38:29,500 All right. How's everybody doin'? Ain't God good? 1785 01:38:29,500 --> 01:38:31,291 Amen. All the time. 1786 01:38:31,291 --> 01:38:34,125 It is a pleasure and a privilege to be here... 1787 01:38:34,125 --> 01:38:37,458 for Papa J. and Mama J.'s 50th anniversary. 1788 01:38:37,458 --> 01:38:40,667 Lord, growin' up in this Jenkins's household was somethin' else. 1789 01:38:40,667 --> 01:38:43,125 And Papa J.'s a strong man. 1790 01:38:43,125 --> 01:38:46,417 I mean, this the kind of person, he say he slap the black off of you, 1791 01:38:46,417 --> 01:38:48,583 I mean, the black really will come off. 1792 01:38:48,583 --> 01:38:50,834 I woke up light-skinned at least three times in my life. 1793 01:38:50,834 --> 01:38:54,708 [ Laughing ] Yeah, I got it all back. 1794 01:38:54,708 --> 01:38:57,917 You all right? You barely ate. 1795 01:38:57,917 --> 01:39:00,875 But, you know, workin' in his hardware store-- Oh, I-- 1796 01:39:00,875 --> 01:39:03,875 I just wish Roscoe were here. 1797 01:39:03,875 --> 01:39:06,041 Roscoe made his choice. 1798 01:39:07,333 --> 01:39:10,208 You didn't give him much of one. 1799 01:39:10,208 --> 01:39:14,291 What was I supposed to do, be disrespected in my own home? 1800 01:39:15,166 --> 01:39:18,291 Be his father. 1801 01:39:18,291 --> 01:39:23,208 Giving him your name doesn't make him you, Roscoe. 1802 01:39:23,208 --> 01:39:27,333 It doesn't make him Betty or Otis or even Clyde. 1803 01:39:27,333 --> 01:39:31,417 He's Roscoe Jr. R.J. 1804 01:39:31,417 --> 01:39:36,375 And for a boy who didn't feel the support of his family, 1805 01:39:36,375 --> 01:39:39,041 he's doing quite well for himself. 1806 01:39:39,041 --> 01:39:41,500 [ Clyde ] ...sleepin' in the bottom bunk bed, 1807 01:39:41,500 --> 01:39:43,291 you know, under R.J., 1808 01:39:43,291 --> 01:39:46,250 and then I was nervous 'cause he would pee in the bed. 1809 01:39:46,250 --> 01:39:50,208 That would, uh-- Hey, I would have some scary nights sometimes. 1810 01:39:50,208 --> 01:39:53,166 You know, it's hard sleeping with a raincoat on, you know. 1811 01:39:53,166 --> 01:39:55,583 And, uh, you know-- and-- 1812 01:39:55,583 --> 01:39:58,208 And I tried to explain to them that, you know-- 1813 01:39:58,208 --> 01:40:01,375 That's Roscoe the one that's peein' in the bed, not me. 1814 01:40:01,375 --> 01:40:05,542 And, um-- he, uh-- [ Crying ] 1815 01:40:06,625 --> 01:40:10,125 [ Sobbing ] 1816 01:40:10,125 --> 01:40:12,708 You know, just the way they took me in was so gracious. 1817 01:40:12,708 --> 01:40:15,625 They didn't have to do that. I thank you. 1818 01:40:15,625 --> 01:40:18,125 I thank y'all, and, uh-- 1819 01:40:18,125 --> 01:40:20,959 Because I don't know where I would be right now if, uh-- 1820 01:40:20,959 --> 01:40:23,458 [ Weeping, Howling ] 1821 01:40:23,458 --> 01:40:25,875 Nigga, what is you cryin' for? 1822 01:40:25,875 --> 01:40:28,542 Big old Sugar Bear lookin' ass boy. [ Sobbing ] 1823 01:40:28,542 --> 01:40:31,792 Sittin' up there cryin'. He still wearin' pajamas with the feet in 'em. 1824 01:40:31,792 --> 01:40:33,708 [ Crying, Snorting ] 1825 01:40:33,708 --> 01:40:36,917 Wow. I never seen Clyde cry before. 1826 01:40:36,917 --> 01:40:39,083 [ All Murmuring ] 1827 01:40:39,083 --> 01:40:41,417 A-- Ain't nobody crying. 1828 01:40:41,417 --> 01:40:43,625 I'm just cleansin'. 1829 01:40:43,625 --> 01:40:46,291 Nah, those some real tears right there. 1830 01:40:46,291 --> 01:40:49,375 I know. 1831 01:40:49,375 --> 01:40:53,583 I've cried more than a newborn baby gettin' his ass popped. 1832 01:40:53,583 --> 01:40:55,291 [ Crowd Laughing ] 1833 01:40:55,291 --> 01:40:57,458 Hey, guys. I've been beat up-- 1834 01:40:57,458 --> 01:41:00,083 Hi, Jamaal. insulted, 1835 01:41:00,083 --> 01:41:02,291 laughed at... 1836 01:41:02,291 --> 01:41:04,125 a lot. 1837 01:41:04,125 --> 01:41:07,917 [ Crowd Laughing ] Hey, you're laughin' already. 1838 01:41:09,458 --> 01:41:14,125 I've lost more games and competitions to Clyde than I can remember. 1839 01:41:14,125 --> 01:41:18,542 Oh, 3,459 and countin'. 1840 01:41:18,542 --> 01:41:22,917 [ Laughing ] Thank you, Clyde. 1841 01:41:25,583 --> 01:41:28,166 I thought I was a loser, 1842 01:41:28,166 --> 01:41:31,333 so I went away and transformed myself... 1843 01:41:31,333 --> 01:41:33,625 into what I thought was a winner. 1844 01:41:35,333 --> 01:41:38,834 But bein' around y'all-- [ Chuckles ] 1845 01:41:38,834 --> 01:41:41,792 is a 24/7-- [ Chuckles ] 1846 01:41:41,792 --> 01:41:43,875 reality check. 1847 01:41:43,875 --> 01:41:46,625 Y'all rough on a brother. 1848 01:41:46,625 --> 01:41:52,125 Phew. The clothes, the car, the Survivor. 1849 01:41:55,333 --> 01:41:59,375 - Y'all pull no punches. - You know that's right. 1850 01:41:59,375 --> 01:42:02,750 Betty, you got a hell of a right hand. 1851 01:42:02,750 --> 01:42:06,333 That's no joke. And, O., you got a hell of a left hand. 1852 01:42:06,333 --> 01:42:09,250 [ Laughing ] That's right. 1853 01:42:09,250 --> 01:42:11,583 But look, I-- 1854 01:42:11,583 --> 01:42:15,000 I want to thank you, all of you-- 1855 01:42:15,000 --> 01:42:17,083 my family. 1856 01:42:18,375 --> 01:42:21,667 Thank you for making me a better man, 1857 01:42:23,083 --> 01:42:25,208 for givin' me strength to-- 1858 01:42:25,208 --> 01:42:29,041 to withstand anything this world throws at me, 1859 01:42:29,041 --> 01:42:31,917 for unconditional love... 1860 01:42:33,375 --> 01:42:35,959 and a place to call home. 1861 01:42:35,959 --> 01:42:39,208 Mm-mmm. I'm not gonna do it. 1862 01:42:39,208 --> 01:42:42,083 I'm not gonna cry. Mmm. 1863 01:42:43,333 --> 01:42:46,125 Happy anniversary, Mommy, Daddy. 1864 01:42:46,125 --> 01:42:48,125 I love you. 1865 01:42:48,125 --> 01:42:50,333 [ Mouthing Words ] 1866 01:42:58,375 --> 01:43:00,792 I'm so proud of you. 1867 01:43:02,166 --> 01:43:06,000 I know. [ Sobbing ] We all need love. 1868 01:43:06,000 --> 01:43:09,542 Yeah, come on, Clyde. We gonna let them have this moment, a'ight? 1869 01:43:09,542 --> 01:43:12,083 I just want a hug, O. I know, baby. Come over here. 1870 01:43:12,083 --> 01:43:14,583 Son, 1871 01:43:14,583 --> 01:43:16,708 if I ever drove you away, 1872 01:43:16,708 --> 01:43:19,333 if I ever made you feel unworthy, 1873 01:43:19,333 --> 01:43:21,417 I'm sorry. 1874 01:43:21,417 --> 01:43:24,708 I love you. Glad to have you back. 1875 01:43:24,708 --> 01:43:29,083 Those words you just said, that's the best gift I've ever received, 1876 01:43:29,083 --> 01:43:31,083 R.J. Stevens. 1877 01:43:31,083 --> 01:43:33,542 Well, it's from the heart, Daddy, 1878 01:43:33,542 --> 01:43:36,542 and the name is Jenkins. 1879 01:43:36,542 --> 01:43:39,959 Roscoe Steven Jenkins. 1880 01:43:39,959 --> 01:43:42,917 Just like my daddy. 1881 01:43:43,792 --> 01:43:46,083 [ Crowd ] Aww! 1882 01:43:47,708 --> 01:43:50,125 Reggie, come here. What the hell is wrong with you, man? 1883 01:43:50,125 --> 01:43:54,000 What the hell has gotten into you? Man, it's so great. 1884 01:44:03,458 --> 01:44:06,083 Go get her, Son. 1885 01:44:10,583 --> 01:44:13,959 [ Woman ] ♪ A few stolen moments ♪ 1886 01:44:13,959 --> 01:44:17,583 ♪ Is all that we shared ♪ 1887 01:44:17,583 --> 01:44:21,291 ♪ You've got your family ♪ 1888 01:44:21,291 --> 01:44:24,667 ♪ And they need you there ♪ Lucinda? 1889 01:44:24,667 --> 01:44:26,542 Yes? ♪ Though I tried to resist ♪ 1890 01:44:26,542 --> 01:44:31,375 I waited 20 years to create this opportunity. ♪ Being last on your list ♪ 1891 01:44:31,375 --> 01:44:35,375 Would you dance with me? ♪ But no other man's ♪ 1892 01:44:35,375 --> 01:44:39,291 I'd love to. ♪ Gonna do ♪ 1893 01:44:39,291 --> 01:44:43,375 ♪ So I'm saving all my love ♪ 'Cinda. 1894 01:44:43,375 --> 01:44:45,667 ♪ For you ♪ I'm happy for you. 1895 01:44:45,667 --> 01:44:49,458 Hey. Hey-hey! Betty, come on. Let's get out here and cut a rug, girl. 1896 01:44:49,458 --> 01:44:51,542 Negro, we cousins. That's nasty. 1897 01:44:51,542 --> 01:44:54,500 So desperate. That's a damn shame. 1898 01:44:54,500 --> 01:44:57,375 You gonna play me for him? He got on a ankle bracelet! 1899 01:44:57,375 --> 01:45:01,083 ♪ To be free ♪ 1900 01:45:01,083 --> 01:45:05,625 ♪ You said, "Be patient ♪ 1901 01:45:05,625 --> 01:45:08,458 ♪ Just wait a little longer" ♪ 1902 01:45:08,458 --> 01:45:15,625 ♪ But that's just an old fantasy ♪ 1903 01:45:15,625 --> 01:45:19,041 ♪ I got to get ready ♪ [ Groans ] 1904 01:45:19,041 --> 01:45:22,417 ♪ Just a few minutes more ♪ Thank you. Whoa! 1905 01:45:22,417 --> 01:45:26,375 ♪ 'Cause tonight is the night ♪ [ Cackling ] 1906 01:45:26,375 --> 01:45:29,917 ♪ For feeling all right ♪ 1907 01:45:29,917 --> 01:45:32,166 ♪ We'll be making love ♪ 1908 01:45:32,166 --> 01:45:37,166 ♪ The whole night through ♪ 1909 01:45:37,166 --> 01:45:40,750 ♪ So I'm saving all my love ♪ 1910 01:45:40,750 --> 01:45:44,208 ♪ Yes, I'm saving all my love♪ 1911 01:45:44,208 --> 01:45:47,625 ♪ Yes, I'm saving all my love ♪ 1912 01:45:47,625 --> 01:45:50,375 ♪ For you ♪ [ Otis ] There your boy is right there. 1913 01:45:50,375 --> 01:45:54,041 [ Betty ] Look at Roscoe tryin' to be in love. I heard that. 1914 01:45:54,041 --> 01:45:56,458 [ Papa Jenkins ] Now, that's a good picture. 1915 01:45:56,458 --> 01:45:58,583 [ All Chattering ] 1916 01:45:58,583 --> 01:46:00,583 Look at that blue bonnet. 1917 01:46:00,583 --> 01:46:03,750 I thought of that one. I thought we had that on there. 1918 01:46:03,750 --> 01:46:07,750 ♪ So I'm saving all my love for you ♪ 1919 01:46:07,750 --> 01:46:10,125 That's a blue bonnet, baby. Pow. Pow. 1920 01:46:10,125 --> 01:46:12,708 That boy crazy right there. Pow. 1921 01:46:12,708 --> 01:46:14,959 We do have one hell of a family. 1922 01:46:14,959 --> 01:46:18,834 We sure do, Daddy. Where are those two anyway? 1923 01:46:18,834 --> 01:46:21,041 Oh, Ma, you know where they are. That's nice. 1924 01:46:21,041 --> 01:46:24,333 ♪ 'Cause tonight is the night ♪ [ Growling ] 1925 01:46:24,333 --> 01:46:27,417 ♪ That I'm feeling all right ♪ 1926 01:46:28,166 --> 01:46:31,125 ♪ We'll be making love ♪ 1927 01:46:31,125 --> 01:46:35,625 - ♪ The whole night through ♪ - [ Both ] Uh-uh. 1928 01:46:35,625 --> 01:46:38,708 ♪ So I'm saving all my love ♪ [ Both Whining ] 1929 01:46:38,708 --> 01:46:46,458 ♪ For you ♪ 1930 01:46:46,458 --> 01:46:51,959 ♪ For you ♪ 1931 01:46:51,959 --> 01:46:55,125 [ Male Announcer ] Ladies and gentlemen, your host, Roscoe Jenkins! 1932 01:46:55,125 --> 01:47:00,375 [ Cheering ] Thank you. Thank you. 1933 01:47:00,375 --> 01:47:03,834 Ah, y'all looking good. Looking good. 1934 01:47:03,834 --> 01:47:05,959 What's good, family? 1935 01:47:05,959 --> 01:47:09,166 Today's show is about family. 1936 01:47:09,166 --> 01:47:11,166 And what better way to kick it off... 1937 01:47:11,166 --> 01:47:13,250 than with the doctor's own? 1938 01:47:13,250 --> 01:47:15,542 Say hello to the Jenkins clan. 1939 01:47:15,542 --> 01:47:17,834 [ Cheering ] Hey, y'all. Hey, everybody. 1940 01:47:17,834 --> 01:47:20,041 Oh! Pump, pump, pump, pump, pump, pump, pa-pump. 1941 01:47:20,041 --> 01:47:22,083 Pump, pump, pump, pump. Yes! 1942 01:47:22,083 --> 01:47:24,166 Good. Uh, we'll be right back. Mind your business, Otis. 1943 01:47:24,166 --> 01:47:27,000 We just tryin' to have a good time here on 'Scoe's show. 1944 01:47:27,000 --> 01:47:30,291 You're always gotta say something. [ Otis ] Let him run the show. 1945 01:47:31,250 --> 01:47:33,542 Let's get started. 1946 01:47:34,708 --> 01:47:38,166 You a doctor, so tell me this. 1947 01:47:38,166 --> 01:47:42,166 Why am I having trouble reachin' an orgasm? 1948 01:47:42,166 --> 01:47:46,291 - So you never been able to? - I know how to get myself to the destination. 1949 01:47:46,291 --> 01:47:49,083 I just need a captain to navigate the waters. 1950 01:47:49,083 --> 01:47:51,500 Now, 'Scoe, you got to help me here. 1951 01:47:51,500 --> 01:47:55,125 Is that thing physical, or is that thing mental? Or is it emotional, 'Scoe? 1952 01:47:55,125 --> 01:47:57,125 Like, where do you go to find-- 1953 01:47:57,125 --> 01:47:59,041 Can we cut? I'm-- I'm uncomfortable. 1954 01:47:59,041 --> 01:48:01,667 I'm just tryin' to figure out how I'm supposed to get mine. 1955 01:48:01,667 --> 01:48:04,375 So you think it's okay to spank your kids? 1956 01:48:04,375 --> 01:48:07,125 Yeah, I spank my kids. I get in their-- [ Bleeps ] 1957 01:48:07,125 --> 01:48:10,000 They-- [ Bleeps ] up, I start-- [ Bleeps ] them up. 1958 01:48:10,000 --> 01:48:11,959 Tag team. 1959 01:48:11,959 --> 01:48:15,708 - O., cuss words. - Oh, gee. I'm sorry. 1960 01:48:15,708 --> 01:48:18,458 [ Bleeps ] that. You know me, man. 1961 01:48:18,458 --> 01:48:20,375 Hustlin' is my job. 1962 01:48:20,375 --> 01:48:23,708 I mean, I ain't never really paid no rent. You know what I'm sayin'? 1963 01:48:23,708 --> 01:48:26,417 I ain't never really paid up for no bills. 1964 01:48:26,417 --> 01:48:30,959 But for some reason, I've always got cash in my pocket. 1965 01:48:30,959 --> 01:48:33,959 I guess it's 'cause I got a honest face. 1966 01:48:35,583 --> 01:48:38,458 I mean, you might have a problem with that... 1967 01:48:38,458 --> 01:48:41,291 since when we was little, I would always beat you. 1968 01:48:41,291 --> 01:48:44,208 You know what I'm sayin'? You pull out the cards. You one, two, three. 1969 01:48:44,208 --> 01:48:47,083 You draw four, and I'm, like, bam! Uno. You know what I'm sayin'? 1970 01:48:47,083 --> 01:48:50,542 You make a move. I'm C-4, C-2-- bam! I sunk your battleship. 1971 01:48:50,542 --> 01:48:52,375 You remember that, don't you? 1972 01:48:52,375 --> 01:48:56,708 And then he be finished. I'm, like, "Damn. Is somethin' wrong with my-- my cakes?" 1973 01:48:56,708 --> 01:49:00,125 You know what I'm sayin'? I don't know if somethin' wrong with my tasty cakes, 'Scoe. 1974 01:49:00,125 --> 01:49:02,959 You actually Tase your kids? 1975 01:49:02,959 --> 01:49:06,125 Hell, yeah, I Tase my-- [ Bleeps ] kids. When they shocked, they go, like-- 1976 01:49:06,125 --> 01:49:08,750 I say, "You gonna take out that trash now, ain't you?" [ Grunting ] 1977 01:49:08,750 --> 01:49:12,000 For not takin' out the trash? [ Imitating Taser Shocking ] 1978 01:49:12,000 --> 01:49:16,291 45,000 volts right through his big-- [ Bleeps ] 1979 01:49:16,291 --> 01:49:19,708 - [ Blubbering ] - Yeah. 1980 01:49:19,708 --> 01:49:22,875 [ Cell Phone Ringing ] Wait. Hold on. Who is this? 1981 01:49:22,875 --> 01:49:24,959 Yeah. What it is. 1982 01:49:24,959 --> 01:49:28,291 Man, I'm on the show. You ain't watchin'? I'm on the show right now. 1983 01:49:28,291 --> 01:49:30,959 I ain't gotta-- I'm on the show. Look at me. Look! 1984 01:49:30,959 --> 01:49:33,041 [ Babbling ] 1985 01:49:33,041 --> 01:49:36,959 We could do it right now. You put your hands up. Bam, bam, bam. 1986 01:49:36,959 --> 01:49:38,917 Or rock-paper-scissors. 1987 01:49:38,917 --> 01:49:41,667 We could go right here. I mean, what you scratchin' for? 1988 01:49:41,667 --> 01:49:44,458 You know, we gonna scratch? You wanna have a scratch battle? 1989 01:49:44,458 --> 01:49:48,291 'Cause we could scratch out. We can D.J. scratch. [ Imitating Record Scratching ] 1990 01:49:48,291 --> 01:49:51,834 I make me a bubble bath, light me some little candles... 1991 01:49:51,834 --> 01:49:54,166 and then I gets down in that water, 'Scoe. 1992 01:49:54,166 --> 01:49:57,875 And I be-- Ooh! I'm thinkin' 'bout it right now. 1993 01:49:57,875 --> 01:50:00,375 Let me get myself together. God, forgive me. Oh. Cut. Cut! 1994 01:50:00,375 --> 01:50:03,375 Take the $150, go buy you a eight-ball. 1995 01:50:03,375 --> 01:50:05,708 Flip the eight-ball. You gonna make 300 off that. 1996 01:50:05,708 --> 01:50:07,792 Take the 300, get you a quarter. 1997 01:50:07,792 --> 01:50:11,250 Take the quarter ounce, flip that. Stay over at Aunt Lea's. 1998 01:50:11,250 --> 01:50:13,750 Like, if you was in the audience out there, 1999 01:50:13,750 --> 01:50:15,834 I'd race you up and down the audience steps. 2000 01:50:15,834 --> 01:50:18,083 We could go. You know we could go too. 2001 01:50:18,083 --> 01:50:22,500 Take the half-ounce money, flip the half-ounce money. Now you ready for a ounce. 2002 01:50:22,500 --> 01:50:24,208 You got a quarter key now. 2003 01:50:24,208 --> 01:50:28,375 neighborhood got on new sneakers and walkie-talkies. 2004 01:50:28,375 --> 01:50:33,083 Everybody is working for you. You doin' your thang and everythang. 2005 01:50:36,417 --> 01:50:39,375 I hope the feds ain't watchin' this. 2006 01:50:39,375 --> 01:50:41,834 I'll call you back. 2007 01:50:41,834 --> 01:50:44,041 I am. I am afraid, okay? 2008 01:50:44,041 --> 01:50:48,125 I mean, I'm-I'm afraid of bein' hurt, and I don't want to be hurt. 2009 01:50:48,125 --> 01:50:51,708 - You pursue unattainable men. - What? 2010 01:50:51,708 --> 01:50:56,333 - You want men you can't have. - Men I can't have? 2011 01:50:56,333 --> 01:50:59,708 Listen here. [ Bleeps ] Okay? I can have any man I want, okay? 2012 01:50:59,708 --> 01:51:04,291 Don't get me twisted, 'Scoe. I am pretty in the face and thick around the waist. 2013 01:51:04,291 --> 01:51:06,333 You better ask somebody. I got sugar walls! 2014 01:51:06,333 --> 01:51:10,333 This right here's sweet tea. Ain't that right, baby? Ow. 2015 01:51:10,333 --> 01:51:12,667 Yo, Ma. Yeah. 2016 01:51:12,667 --> 01:51:16,083 I'm sayin', Doc, the booty is illmatic! 2017 01:51:16,083 --> 01:51:21,250 Well, that wasn't quite what a brother had in mind, 2018 01:51:21,250 --> 01:51:23,375 but that's the thing about family-- 2019 01:51:23,375 --> 01:51:25,834 unpredictable but entertaining. 2020 01:51:25,834 --> 01:51:29,041 And we love 'em. [ Kisses ] Peace. 2021 01:51:29,041 --> 01:51:33,417 [ Man ] ♪ We only kin Everyone of us ♪ 2022 01:51:33,417 --> 01:51:36,917 ♪ Oh, ah ♪ 2023 01:51:38,625 --> 01:51:42,959 ♪ My uncle, my auntie and all my cousins ♪ ♪ Ooh, ooh ♪ 2024 01:51:42,959 --> 01:51:45,166 ♪ Yeah, yeah ♪ 2025 01:51:45,166 --> 01:51:47,417 ♪ Family ♪ 2026 01:51:47,417 --> 01:51:52,458 ♪ [ R & B ] 2027 01:51:52,458 --> 01:51:58,583 [ Man ] ♪ All right, yeah ♪ [ Women ] ♪ La-la-la-la La-la-la-la-la ♪ 2028 01:51:59,959 --> 01:52:02,458 [ Man ] ♪ Growin' up, it was tough ♪ 2029 01:52:02,458 --> 01:52:05,708 ♪ We were glad for what little we had ♪ 2030 01:52:05,708 --> 01:52:08,500 ♪ I saw my share of old fair Mississippi ♪ 2031 01:52:08,500 --> 01:52:11,625 ♪ Dirt roads and Confederate flags ♪ 2032 01:52:11,625 --> 01:52:14,542 ♪ Every day my father would tell me ♪ 2033 01:52:14,542 --> 01:52:17,583 ♪ "Son, run and don't never come back" ♪ 2034 01:52:17,583 --> 01:52:20,458 ♪ That's where I left my girl♪ 2035 01:52:20,458 --> 01:52:23,959 ♪ That's where my heart is at and oh ♪ 2036 01:52:23,959 --> 01:52:26,834 ♪ I held my breath when they dipped my head ♪ 2037 01:52:26,834 --> 01:52:30,083 ♪ Then I came up shiny and new ♪ ♪ Laid down my burden ♪ 2038 01:52:30,083 --> 01:52:32,917 ♪ Found out about love in the back of my Impala ♪ 2039 01:52:32,917 --> 01:52:35,792 ♪ Where they laid my grandfather too ♪ 2040 01:52:35,792 --> 01:52:38,959 ♪ Down by the river where black folks gather ♪ 2041 01:52:38,959 --> 01:52:41,959 ♪ After Sunday service is through ♪ 2042 01:52:41,959 --> 01:52:45,041 ♪ How the river runs to the ocean ♪ 2043 01:52:45,041 --> 01:52:48,208 ♪ I'll be runnin' right back to you ♪ ♪ Running back to you ♪ 2044 01:52:48,208 --> 01:52:51,583 ♪ Ah ♪ ♪ So I'm packin' up my suitcase ♪ 2045 01:52:51,583 --> 01:52:54,458 ♪ Ah ♪ ♪ Bought me a one-way fare ♪ 2046 01:52:54,458 --> 01:52:57,291 ♪ Ah ♪ ♪ I'm leaving everything behind me ♪ 2047 01:52:57,291 --> 01:53:00,542 ♪ Ah-ah ♪ ♪ But in my heart I'll always care ♪ 2048 01:53:00,542 --> 01:53:05,667 [ Woman ] ♪ And I'll still be right there ♪ 2049 01:53:05,667 --> 01:53:07,667 [ Man ] ♪ Thank you, baby ♪ 2050 01:53:07,667 --> 01:53:11,375 ♪ 'Cause nothin' can replace that part in my life ♪ 2051 01:53:11,375 --> 01:53:15,333 ♪ And whoa ♪ ♪ I held my breath when they dipped my head ♪ 2052 01:53:15,333 --> 01:53:18,875 ♪ Then I came up shiny and new ♪ ♪ I came out a new man ♪ 2053 01:53:18,875 --> 01:53:21,458 ♪ Found out about love in the back of my Impala ♪ 2054 01:53:21,458 --> 01:53:25,250 ♪ Where they laid my grandfather too ♪ ♪ Down by the river ♪ 2055 01:53:25,250 --> 01:53:27,792 ♪ Where the black folks gather ♪ 2056 01:53:27,792 --> 01:53:31,125 ♪ After Sunday service is through ♪ ♪ Oh, Lord ♪ 2057 01:53:31,125 --> 01:53:34,166 ♪ How the river runs to the ocean ♪ ♪ Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 2058 01:53:34,166 --> 01:53:39,000 ♪ I'll be runnin' right back to you ♪ 161060