Original subtitles

TOOKIE BAH WABA!

HAO!

IKI BAH BAH.

HA HA HA.

? I LAILA 'O KAUA'I LA ?

? NO MALIHINI OHANA ?

? WELCOME, COUSINS, A-COME ON BY ?

? ALOHA, E KOMO MAI ?

MAKA MAKA.

? I LAILA 'O KAUA'I LA ?

? NO MALIHINI OHANA ?

? WELCOME, COUSINS, A-COME ON BY ?

? ALOHA, E KOMO MAI ?

? ALOHA, E KOMO MAI ?

HEH HEH HA HA HA!

AH HEH HEH HEH HEH HEH HEH HEH!

? IKI TOOKIE NEE HI! ?

? IKI TOOKIE NEE HI! ?

? AKA TIKI BAH BAH ?

? AKA TIKI BAH BAH ?

? GABBA IKA TASOOPA? ?

? GABBA IKA TASOOPA? ?

OOOCHA! CHI-KA!

? MIKI MIKI COCONUT ?

? I LAILA 'O KAUA'I LA ?

? NO MALIHINI OHANA ?

? WELCOME, COUSINS, A-COME ON BY ?

? ALOHA, E KOMO MAI ?

TOOKIE BAH WABA!

? ALOHA, E KOMO MAI ?

AH HEH HEH HEH HEH!

? ALOHA, E KOMO MAI ?

BYE!

DON'T WORRY ABOUT A THING, MRS. HASAGAWA.

STITCH AND I WILL WATCH OVER THINGS

WHILE YOU GO AND PICK UP YOUR PEA PODS.

[TRUCK BACKFIRES]

I'LL BE BACK IN AN HOUR WITH MY BEAN BAGS.

PEA PODS!

NOT BEAN BAGS, PEA PODS!

ALOHA, MRS. EDMONDS.

ALOHA, LILO.

I DON'T SEE BANANAS ANYWHERE.

HUH? SHE ALWAYS HAS BANANAS.

[SNIFFING]

WHOO! BANANAS!

HOW COME THEY'RE DOWN THERE?

[CHOMPING]

AAH! AH AH AH!

MRS. HASAGAWA DOESN'T KNOW IT,

BUT SHE'S ABOUT TO GET ORGANIZED.

READY, STITCH?

[CRACKS KNUCKLES]

HUP! HUP! HUP! HUP!

[HUMMING]

MAHALA FOR THE BANANAS, MRS. HASAGAWA.

ARE THEY ALWAYS THIS GREEN?

OH, THAT'S A CUCUMBER, DEAR.

BUT I'M MAKING A BANANA CREAM PIE.

THEN DON'T USE CUCUMBERS.

NO, I WAS GONNA USE BANANAS.

WELL, THEN WHY ARE YOU BUYING CUCUMBERS?

HERE ARE THE BANANAS.

RADISHES?

EVERYTHING SEEMS TO HAVE BEEN MOVED.

ISN'T IT GREAT?

YOU DON'T HAVE TO THANK US, MRS. HASAGAWA.

STITCH AND I JUST LOVE TO BE HELPFUL.

OH. UH, OK.

HMM. JUST AS I SUSPECTED.

MRS. HASAGAWA'S HOUSE NEEDS OUR HELP, TOO.

BIG TIME!

LILO? I THOUGHT I HEARD YOU OUT HERE.

LOOK WHAT WE DID!

FIXING UP YOUR CART WENT SO WELL,

WE DECIDED TO HELP YOU AT YOUR HOUSE, TOO.

OH, MY.

ISN'T IT GREAT?

HUH? HUH? HUH?

OH, MY PERSIAN WILD BLOSSOMS.

WHERE DID THEY GO, I WONDER.

THOSE WERE JUST WEEDS, RIGHT?

[SIGHS]

OH. SORRY.

MAYBE WE COULD GO TO PERSIA TO GET MORE?

IS IT FAR?

NO, THAT'S OK, LILO.

MAHALO PLENTY FOR ALL THE WORK.

MAYBE YOU WANT TO REST NOW.

HOW ABOUT A NICE APRICOT?

THEY'RE ALL OVER MY YARD THIS YEAR,

WHICH IS A LITTLE STRANGE,

BECAUSE I DON'T HAVE AN APRICOT TREE.

[GASPS] EXPERIMENT PODS!

BUT WE HAVE TO WASH THEM FIRST.

WAIT! NO!

NOW HELP YOURSELF,

BUT BE CAREFUL OF THE PITS.

OH, MY!

UH-OH.

Lilo: A MULCHER.

HEY!

Lilo: A BIG BLOWHARD.

UHHHH.

[HAWKING]

AAH!

[SPITTING]

AAH! A LOOGIER!

OH, NO. STITCH!

Lilo: ONE WITH FOUR HEADS.

Four-part harmony: ? WE'RE EVIL 'CAUSE WE SING ?

? ANNOYINGLY ?

? OFF-KEY ?

PLEASE!

Lilo: A WOODCHUCK!

AW, SUCH A GOOD KITTY.

MRS. HASAGAWA, BE CAREFUL!

WAIT. DID YOU CALL HIM KITTY?

SO MANY OF THE MOST UNUSUAL STRAY CATS

COME TO LIVE WITH ME HERE,

BUT I DON'T MIND.

THEY KEEP ME COMPANY.

MRS. HASAGAWA, EXACTLY HOW MANY "KITTIES" DO YOU HAVE?

OH, GOODNESS. I NEVER COUNTED THEM ALL.

[SNORING]

Computer voice: EXPERIMENT 111 ACTIVATED.

HMM? WHAT? WHAT?

WARNING. EXPERIMENT 533 ACTIVATED.

WARNING. EXPERIMENT 024 ACTIVATED.

WARNING-

TAKE OFF YOUR HEADPHONES.

625, I AM TRYING TO SLEEP!

WARNING. EXPERIMENT 090 ACTIVATED.

STUPID ALARM CLOCK.

THAT'S NOT YOUR ALARM CLOCK.

LET ME SLEEP IN PEACE.

OH, YEAH. REST UP.

IN CASE ONE OF THOSE EXPERIMENTS IS ACTIVATED, HUH?

WARNING. EXPERIMENT 507 ACTIVATED.

DO COME IN.

BE OUR GUESTS, PLEASE.

Stitch: COUSIN.

YOU CAN SEE THEY MADE THEMSELVES AT HOME.

Lilo: I DON'T BELIEVE IT.

AH HA HA HA HA!

GOTCHA!

OW!

AH HA HA HA HA!

Lilo: A PINCHER, A WRAPPER, A SNORER.

COUSIN. COUSIN. COUSIN!

A SHREDDER. A DOUBLE-DIPPER.

YUCK!

BAD KITTY!

I TOLD YOU BEFORE, OFF THE TABLE!

Lilo: A BOOMERANG!

A DRILLER!

NO, NO! NOT ON THE RUG!

THAT'S BETTER.

MRS. HASAGAWA, WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

WE HAVE TO GET JUMBA AND PLEAKLEY'S HELP

IF WE'RE GOING TO CATCH ALL THESE EXPERIMENTS.

AAH!

HMM. CONCENTRATION OF MULTIPLE PODS

FALLING TO ONE LOCATION?

STATISTICALLY UNLIKELY.

BUT NOT IMPOSSIBLE.

MAY I TAKE YOUR COAT, MADAM?

NO! AWAY! GO!

SHOO! SHOO, YOU LITTLE MONSTER!

MY EVIL CREATIONS,

DESIGNED FOR INTERPLANETARY CHAOS,

NOW LIKE FELINES IN LONELY LADY'S HOUSE.

OY.

THERE'S ANOTHER! GET IT! GET IT! AAH!

[GASPS] IS THIS WHAT I REALLY LOOK LIKE?

MMM. 214 DESIGNED TO TAKE ONLY BAD PICTURES OF PEOPLE.

HA HA HA. SO EVIL.

DON'T WORRY, MRS. HASAGAWA.

WE'LL TAKE CARE OF THE PROBLEM.

MY FRIENDS AND I ARE PROFESSIONALS.

PROBLEM? BUT-

Pleakley: I'M GONNA GET THIS GUY

INTO THE CAPSULE.

NO! JUMBA WILL CAPTURE HIM.

NO! I GOT IT.

Jumba: NO! ME!

AH-AH-AH.

HOW RUDE I HAVE BEEN.

APOLOGIES.

WON'T YOU PLEASE FORGIVE ME?

GOTCHA! GOTCHA!

SUCH A NICE KITTY.

WHOA, OH, OH! [BLOWING]

UM, LILO!

PLEAKLEY!

JUST A MOMENT, LILO.

I WOULDN'T WANT TO BE DISCOURTEOUS TO THIS EXPERIMENT.

PLEAKLEY, THIS IS NOT THE TIME TO BE POLITE.

TERRIBLY SORRY. I'M AFRAID IT CAN'T BE HELPED.

IT SEEMS ONE OF STITCH'S COUSINS

GIVES ONE PAINFULLY PERFECT MANNERS.

WHERE'S JUMBA?

OVER HERE.

Pleakley: AAH!

[CRASH]

STITCH!

OK, NOT SO FAST.

THAT'S GOOD.

YOU'RE SAFE NOW, MRS. HASAGAWA.

WE GOT ALL THE, UM, KITTIES

WHERE THEY CAN'T HURT YOU.

FA-TA!

ALL DONE.

YOU'RE TAKING THEM ALL AWAY?

LET ME GET SOMETHING FOR YOU FIRST.

OH, NO. YOU DON'T HAVE TO PAY US.

NO, BUT YOU HAVE TO TAKE THEIR SPECIAL THINGS.

THE SNORING ONE NEEDS HIS PAJAMAS.

THE WHITE ONE ONLY EATS CANNED WET FOOD.

THE ORANGEY ONE HAS HIS SPECIAL NECK PILLOW.

MRS. HASAGAWA, DO YOU REALLY CARE ABOUT THESE GUYS?

OF COURSE. THEY'RE MY OHANA.

YOUR OHANA?

BUT OHANA MEANS...

FAMILY. THEY'RE THE ONLY ONE I'VE GOT.

I'M SO HAPPY THEY'RE ALL BACK.

[HAWKING AND SPITTING]

SORRY, MRS. H.

I GUESS I WAS TRYING TO HELP YOU

WHEN YOU DIDN'T NEED IT,

AND ALL THESE COUSINS

FOUND THEIR ONE TRUE PLACE ON THEIR OWN.

HEY, WHERE'S STITCH?

[BLOWING]

HEE HEE HEE HEE!

NO, YOU FLY HIGHER.

I INSIST. AFTER YOU.

NO, NO, PLEASE. AFTER YOU.

I DO PROTEST. YOU FIRST.

UH-UH-UH. YOU.

DR. JUMBA JOOKIBA,

FORMER LEAD SCIENTIST OF GALAXY DEFENSE INDUSTRIES,

YOU STAND BEFORE THIS COUNCIL

ACCUSED OF ILLEGAL GENETIC EXPERIMENTATION.

NICE WORK.

HA HA! GUILTY AS CHARGED,

O GREAT MORTALGAX THE MALIGNANT.

THE EVIL GENIUSES ORGANIZATION, OR "EGO,"

WAS PARTICULARLY IMPRESSED WITH YOUR TOP-SECRET 400 SERIES.

DELIGHTFULLY WICKED.

THANK YOU.

I'M HOPING TO PUBLISH THE RESULTS IN MAYHEM MONTHLY.

YES. WELL, THERE MIGHT BE

A TEENSY-WEENSY PROBLEM WITH THAT.

PROBLEM?

AS IMPRESSIVE AS THEY LOOK ON PAPER,

WE'VE HEARD SOME DISTRESSING REPORTS

THAT YOUR EVIL EXPERIMENTS ARE NOT ACTING VERY...

WELL, EVIL.

IS INCONCEIVABLE THAT YOU COULD BELIEVE

THAT MY EXPERIMENTS ARE ANYTHING OTHER THAN

TOTALLY AND COMPLETELY 110.6% EVIL.

WE CAN'T RISK THE SCANDAL IF YOU'VE GONE GOOD.

I'M AFRAID I HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO REVOKE YOUR MEMBERSHIP!

MWAH HA HA HA HA!

AH HA HA HA HA!

YOU'VE BEEN WORKING ON NEW EVIL LAUGH.

IS GOOD ONE.

YOU DON'T THINK IT WAS TOO MUCH, DO YOU?

NO, NO. WAS NICE TOUCH.

BUT...REVOKING OF MEMBERSHIP IS CRUEL, EVEN FOR YOU.

IS LONELY BEING EVIL GENIUS.

BELONGING TO EGO GIVES MEANING TO EVIL EXISTENCE.

I'M SORRY, JUMBA.

I MEAN, I-I-I'M NOT SORRY!

I REVEL IN YOUR SORROW!

MWAH HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!

Lilo: NOW, YOU LISTEN HERE, MISTER!

MY UNCLE JUMBA IS THE SMARTEST, GENIUSTEST

EVIL SCIENTIST EVER!

LITTLE GIRL, PLEASE TO BE KEEPING OUT OF THIS.

YOU TAKE BACK WHAT YOU SAID RIGHT NOW!

AMBACUA!

AND I SUPPOSE THIS CUTE LITTLE GIRL

IS YOUR EVIL ASSISTANT.

BWAH HA HA HA HA!

NOT ME! HIM!

[HAWK]

[GARGLING]

HMM...TELL YOU WHAT,

I'M IN YOUR QUADRANT NEXT TUESDAY VISITING MY AUNT BOOTSIE.

IF YOU CAN CONVINCE ME IN PERSON

THAT YOU'RE STILL EVIL,

I'LL EXTEND YOUR MEMBERSHIP.

IT'S A DEAL.

WE'LL SEE YOU TUESDAY.

AYIII!

WE SURE SHOWED HIM.

WHAT CAN WE SHOW HIM?

EGO IS EXPECTING SUPER-EVIL SCIENCE LAB,

NOT CUTESY HAWAIIAN HOMEY-HOME.

THEN THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT WE'LL GIVE THEM.

COME ON!

[HAWKING]

Woman: OH! OUR HOUSE!

[SIREN]

UH! OH! WHOA!

UM...DO YOU HAVE ANY SIXES?

HA! FISH!

BAH! RIDICULOUS EARTH GAME!

Computer voice: WARNING. EXPERIMENT 262 ACTIVATED.

PRIMARY FUNCTION: ERROR.

262 HAS NO KNOWN EVIL USES.

NO EVIL USES?

SAY, I REMEMBER THAT GUY.

JUMBA GOOFED UP HIS USUAL PURE EVIL FORMULA

AND ACCIDENTALLY MADE AN EXPERIMENT THAT WAS PURE GOOD.

HOO-HOO, BOY! WAS HE EMBARRASSED.

KEPT 262 LOCKED IN THE BASEMENT WHEN FRIENDS CAME OVER.

THEN HAMSTERVIEL WILL HAVE NO USE FOR HIM.

AHEM...NOW WHERE WERE WE?

UH...OH, YEAH.

I WAS SAYING HOW YOU LOOK LIKE A FISH.

DOCTOR!

YOU HAVE A VISITOR.

AH! MORTALGAX!

WELCOME TO MY LAIR.

YOU MAY LOOK AROUND, BUT TOUCH NOTHING!

[SNARLING]

AND WHAT ARE YOU WORKING ON NOW, DOCTOR?

DISFIGURED ASSISTANT!

IS TIME TO TEST THE GROSSIFICATION CHAMBER.

I, JUMBA JOOKIBA, EVIL GENIUS,

HAVE DECLARED WAR ON BEAUTY ITSELF!

[STILTED] OH! I AM SO FRIGHTENED!

WHATEVER WILL YOU DO TO ME,

YOU EVIL, EVIL MAN?

I CAN TURN EVEN THE MOST ATTRACTIVE PEOPLE

INTO GROTESQUE MONSTROSITIES!

[ELECTRICITY BUZZING]

[NANI STRUGGLING]

WATCH IT, BUSTER!

BEHOLD!

[WOLF HOWLING]

NICE WORK!

OH, NO! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?

MOMENTS AGO, I WAS A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN IN THE PRIME OF YOUTH,

AND NOW I'M...I'M...

[WHISPERING] Hideous.

WELL, I WOULDN'T SAY HIDEOUS.

[STOMP]

YEOW!

VERILY, I HAVE BECOME AN AFFRONT TO NATURE.

TRULY, YOU ARE THE MOST EVIL GENIUS IN THE GALAXY.

OH, MY!

THAT IS EVIL!

SO, YOU EXTEND MY MEMBERSHIP IN EGO?

PERHAPS...BUT FIRST, I REALLY SHOULD SEE

SOME OF YOUR OTHER EXPERIMENTS AT WORK ON THE ISLAND.

FORTUNATELY, THANKS TO EVIL GENIUS

HACKING OF SECRET SPY SATELLITES, CABLE PROVIDER,

AND NEIGHBOR'S WIRELESS NETWORK,

JUMBA HAS MULTI-CAMERA RECORDINGS OF EXPERIMENTS IN ACTION!

HEH HEH HEH!

PLEASE TO BE WATCHING EXPERIMENT 501, EARTHQUAKE-MAKER

DESIGNED TO SPLIT PLANETS IN TWO

WITH DEVASTATING EARTHQUAKES!

EEE! LOOK AT THAT!

HMM HMM HA HA HA HA!

Jumba: EXPERIMENT 601.

ARRR!

THE KICK-BOXING EXPERIMENT

DESIGNED TO KICK EVERY BOOTY IN THE GALAXY!

AHH!

EXCEPTING YOURS, O MORTALGAX.

EXPERIMENT 509: TURNS FROM NORMAL IF UGLY FINE HOUSE PLANT

TO FOREST OF DESTRUCTIVE EVIL! HA HA HA!

ALSO EXCELLENT FOR BORDERS AND WINDOW BOXES.

[JAWS SNAPPING]

EXPERIMENT 515: DEFORESTATES ENTIRE PLANETS

IN SURPRISINGLY LITTLE TIME.

LOOK AT HIM GO.

EXPERIMENT 606:

CREATES BIG BLACK HOLES OF NOTHINGNESS.

WHAT?!

EXPERIMENT 627: MY LATEST INVENTION.

IS SO EVIL, JUMBA CAN'T EVEN BE DESCRIBING HOW EVIL!

OOH HOO HA HA HA!

AH HA HA HA HA!

NOT BAD, JUMBA.

NOT BAD.

UH, I MEAN, HOW REASONABLY DESPICABLE.

MWAH HA HA HA HA HA!

AHH!

AND FINALLY, FEATURE PRESENTATION.

EPIC BATTLE OF 2- COUNTING THEM, PLEASE-

EVIL DR. JUMBA JOOKIBA EXPERIMENTS!

LET'S WATCH, SHALL WE?

[ICY WIND BLOWING]

[FIRE CRACKLING]

HA HA HA HA!

AH HA!

HEE HEE HEE!

WHAT?

RARRR!

VERY WELL, JUMBA, I'VE SEEN ENOUGH.

BY THE POWER VESTED IN ME BY EGO,

I HEREBY EXTEND YOUR...

[SCREEN CRACKLING] [MEOW]

WHAT IS THAT?

[SIRENS] [CAT MEOWING]

WHERE'S KITTY?

[MEOW]

Lilo: I'VE NEVER SEE HIM BEFORE.

Pleakley: WHAT'S HE DOING?

HEY! DON'T GO IN THERE!

Mortalgax: IT HAD BETTER BE SOMETHING EVIL!

[COUGHING]

[MEOW]

OH, NO!

Mortalgax: HE'S SAVING A KITTY-CAT?

OH, HEH! MUST BE PICKING UP LIVE SATELLITE FEED.

HEY, WILL BE TURNING OFF NOW. OH HO HO...

LET IT PLAY.

[MEW]

KITTY! YOU'RE OK! OHH!

[CHEERING]

WELL, JUMBA, I THINK IT'S CLEAR

THAT YOU DO NOT BELONG IN THE EVIL GENIUSES ORGANIZATION!

GOOD DAY.

MAYBE WE SHOULD START OUR OWN CLUB.

AND SO, AS NEWLY ELECTED PRESIDENT

OF THE ASSOCIATION OF ALIEN REJECTS, REFORMED GENIUSES,

AND GIRLS FROM HAWAII,

OR "ARRGGH!"

I HEREBY PRONOUNCE THIS STRAWBERRY PIE DAY!

DOES CLUB ALLOW ALMOST-REFORMED EVIL GENIUSES?

SURE. 'CAUSE NOW WE'VE GOT ACE AROUND

TO BALANCE OUT YOUR EVIL!

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