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1
00:00:00,500 --> 00:00:02,458
TOOKIE BAH WABA!
2
00:00:03,166 --> 00:00:04,750
HAO!
3
00:00:05,250 --> 00:00:06,624
IKI BAH BAH.
4
00:00:06,625 --> 00:00:08,166
HA HA HA.
5
00:00:09,708 --> 00:00:12,582
? I LAILA 'O KAUA'I LA ?
6
00:00:12,583 --> 00:00:14,374
? NO MALIHINI OHANA ?
7
00:00:14,375 --> 00:00:16,874
? WELCOME, COUSINS,
A-COME ON BY ?
8
00:00:16,875 --> 00:00:18,582
? ALOHA, E KOMO MAI ?
9
00:00:18,583 --> 00:00:19,457
MAKA MAKA.
10
00:00:19,458 --> 00:00:21,457
? I LAILA 'O KAUA'I LA ?
11
00:00:21,458 --> 00:00:23,290
? NO MALIHINI OHANA ?
12
00:00:23,291 --> 00:00:25,832
? WELCOME, COUSINS,
A-COME ON BY ?
13
00:00:25,833 --> 00:00:27,999
? ALOHA, E KOMO MAI ?
14
00:00:28,000 --> 00:00:30,749
? ALOHA, E KOMO MAI ?
15
00:00:30,750 --> 00:00:31,707
HEH HEH HA HA HA!
16
00:00:31,708 --> 00:00:33,999
AH HEH HEH HEH
HEH HEH HEH HEH!
17
00:00:34,000 --> 00:00:35,082
? IKI TOOKIE NEE HI! ?
18
00:00:35,083 --> 00:00:36,165
? IKI TOOKIE NEE HI! ?
19
00:00:36,166 --> 00:00:37,249
? AKA TIKI BAH BAH ?
20
00:00:37,250 --> 00:00:38,457
? AKA TIKI BAH BAH ?
21
00:00:38,458 --> 00:00:39,707
? GABBA IKA TASOOPA? ?
22
00:00:39,708 --> 00:00:40,874
? GABBA IKA TASOOPA? ?
23
00:00:40,875 --> 00:00:41,707
OOOCHA!
CHI-KA!
24
00:00:41,708 --> 00:00:42,707
? MIKI MIKI COCONUT ?
25
00:00:42,708 --> 00:00:44,999
? I LAILA 'O KAUA'I LA ?
26
00:00:45,000 --> 00:00:47,207
? NO MALIHINI OHANA ?
27
00:00:47,208 --> 00:00:49,415
? WELCOME, COUSINS,
A-COME ON BY ?
28
00:00:49,416 --> 00:00:50,999
? ALOHA, E KOMO MAI ?
29
00:00:51,000 --> 00:00:51,874
TOOKIE BAH WABA!
30
00:00:51,875 --> 00:00:53,249
? ALOHA, E KOMO MAI ?
31
00:00:53,250 --> 00:00:54,207
AH HEH HEH HEH HEH!
32
00:00:54,208 --> 00:00:56,249
? ALOHA, E KOMO MAI ?
33
00:00:56,250 --> 00:00:58,250
BYE!
34
00:01:07,750 --> 00:01:11,124
OK, STITCH,
YOU LET ME DO THE TALKING.
35
00:01:11,125 --> 00:01:13,957
I'M SURE I CAN
CONVINCE HER TO HELP US.
36
00:01:13,958 --> 00:01:15,582
OH-KEE TUCKAH!
37
00:01:15,583 --> 00:01:17,957
I KNOW SHE CAN
BE MEAN SOMETIMES,
38
00:01:17,958 --> 00:01:21,165
BUT I HAVE A FEELING
THAT THIS TIME WILL BE DIFFERENT.
39
00:01:21,166 --> 00:01:25,375
I MEAN, IT'S FOR
A GOOD CAUSE, RIGHT?
40
00:01:28,333 --> 00:01:29,624
WHAT DO YOU WANT?
41
00:01:29,625 --> 00:01:32,874
MY SISTER NANI'S
THROWING A BIG DINNER FOR CHARITY
42
00:01:32,875 --> 00:01:34,582
ON FRIDAY NIGHT.
43
00:01:34,583 --> 00:01:35,707
SO?
44
00:01:35,708 --> 00:01:36,874
I THOUGHT WE COULD
PUT THE PAST BEHIND US
45
00:01:36,875 --> 00:01:40,457
AND COME TOGETHER...
IN THE SPIRIT OF KOKUA.
46
00:01:40,458 --> 00:01:41,457
HELPING.
47
00:01:41,458 --> 00:01:42,999
WHAT DO YOU SAY?
48
00:01:43,000 --> 00:01:44,874
YOUR DOGGIE
IS SO UGLY,
49
00:01:44,875 --> 00:01:46,832
IT MAKES
MY EYES HURT.
50
00:01:46,833 --> 00:01:48,832
Girls: YEAH!
51
00:01:48,833 --> 00:01:51,875
HA HA HA!
52
00:01:52,708 --> 00:01:54,708
GOOD ONE, MYRTLE.
53
00:01:55,458 --> 00:01:58,083
COME ON, STITCH.
54
00:01:58,708 --> 00:02:00,582
YOU'RE AVAILABLE!
THAT'S GREAT!
55
00:02:00,583 --> 00:02:04,749
WE HAVE PLENTY OF ROOM
FOR YOU AND YOUR DANCING POODLES.
56
00:02:04,750 --> 00:02:07,457
YOU CHARGE HOW MUCH?
57
00:02:07,458 --> 00:02:09,290
[CASH REGISTER RINGS]
58
00:02:09,291 --> 00:02:11,832
UH, THE THING IS...
59
00:02:11,833 --> 00:02:14,874
IT'S A CHARITY EVENT,
AND WE WERE HOPING-
60
00:02:14,875 --> 00:02:17,582
HELLO? HELLO?
61
00:02:17,583 --> 00:02:18,874
OH!
62
00:02:18,875 --> 00:02:21,707
WELL, WE DIDN'T
GET PETE AND HIS PRANCING POODLES.
63
00:02:21,708 --> 00:02:24,958
[SIGHS]
WHAT AM I GONNA DO?
64
00:02:24,959 --> 00:02:26,499
OW!
65
00:02:26,500 --> 00:02:27,749
IF YOU
NEED ENTERTAINMENT,
66
00:02:27,750 --> 00:02:29,999
I STRONGLY SUGGEST
YOU HIRE ONE OF THESE.
67
00:02:30,000 --> 00:02:32,957
IT'S CALLED
A STAND-UP COMEDIAN.
68
00:02:32,958 --> 00:02:36,207
TV Announcer: THIS WEEK ON
MY FUNNIEST VALENTINE...
69
00:02:36,208 --> 00:02:38,290
BUT SERIOUSLY,
THERE ARE BENEFITS
70
00:02:38,291 --> 00:02:39,874
TO DATING A MAN
WHO COMES WITH HIS OWN PADDING.
71
00:02:39,875 --> 00:02:43,082
IT'S LIKE HAVING
A WALKING PILLOW WITH YOU WHEREVER YOU GO.
72
00:02:43,083 --> 00:02:44,332
AND IF WE EVER
FLEW TOGETHER,
73
00:02:44,333 --> 00:02:47,124
I'D MAKE AN EXCELLENT
FLOTATION DEVICE.
74
00:02:47,125 --> 00:02:48,999
HA HA HA!
75
00:02:49,000 --> 00:02:50,082
[SCOFFS]
76
00:02:50,083 --> 00:02:51,874
WHY IS MAKING FUN OF
OVERLY ROTUND SELF?
77
00:02:51,875 --> 00:02:55,207
WELL, EARTHLINGS DEVELOP
A SENSE OF HUMOR ABOUT THEMSELVES
78
00:02:55,208 --> 00:02:57,457
IN ORDER TO KEEP
FROM BEING HURT BY OTHERS.
79
00:02:57,458 --> 00:02:59,332
IT'S FASCINATING.
IN FACT-
80
00:02:59,333 --> 00:03:02,249
OH, NO.
I KNOW THAT LOOK IN YOUR EYE.
81
00:03:02,250 --> 00:03:04,874
DON'T WORRY,
THIS ISN'T LIKE THE TIME
82
00:03:04,875 --> 00:03:06,457
I WANTED TO BE
AN ICE DANCER.
83
00:03:06,458 --> 00:03:09,249
YES, I UNDERSTAND
THAT YOU'RE A BUSY BAND,
84
00:03:09,250 --> 00:03:12,249
BUT MY FIRST, SECOND,
THIRD, FOURTH,
85
00:03:12,250 --> 00:03:15,374
AND FIFTH CHOICE BANDS
ALL DECLINED, SO-
86
00:03:15,375 --> 00:03:16,624
[PHONE HANGS UP]
87
00:03:16,625 --> 00:03:17,749
HELLO?
88
00:03:17,750 --> 00:03:19,999
NANI, YOUR
ENTERTAINMENT BOOKING TROUBLES
89
00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:20,999
ARE OVER.
90
00:03:21,000 --> 00:03:23,207
YOUR CHARITY DINNER
WILL BE MY DEBUT
91
00:03:23,208 --> 00:03:25,832
AS A STAND-UP
COMEDIAN!
92
00:03:25,833 --> 00:03:27,457
WHAT DO YOU SAY?
HUH? HUH?
93
00:03:27,458 --> 00:03:31,832
IF I LET YOU PERFORM,
WILL YOU DO THE CATERING, TOO?
94
00:03:31,833 --> 00:03:34,874
DID YOU HEAR THAT?
SHE SAID OK!
95
00:03:34,875 --> 00:03:36,582
I HAVE MY FIRST GIG!
96
00:03:36,583 --> 00:03:37,999
I'M LEGIT!
97
00:03:38,000 --> 00:03:40,165
I'M GONNA GO
BUY A NEW OUTFIT.
98
00:03:40,166 --> 00:03:41,874
SOMETHING THAT
SCREAMS HILARITY
99
00:03:41,875 --> 00:03:44,582
AND COMES WITH
MATCHING SHOES.
100
00:03:44,583 --> 00:03:49,415
JUMBA DOES NOT
UNDERSTAND THIS CHARITY BUSINESS.
101
00:03:49,416 --> 00:03:51,457
IS NO EVIL IN IT,
SO WHAT IS POINT?
102
00:03:51,458 --> 00:03:54,749
THERE'S PLENTY OF
EVIL ORGANIZING IT, THAT'S FOR SURE.
103
00:03:54,750 --> 00:03:59,832
I DON'T EVEN KNOW
WHY I BOTHER WITH THIS STUPID CHARITY STUFF.
104
00:03:59,833 --> 00:04:01,082
I MEAN...
105
00:04:01,083 --> 00:04:04,749
CHARITY WORK IS ONE OF
THE MOST IMPORTANT THINGS
106
00:04:04,750 --> 00:04:05,957
WE CAN DO IN LIFE.
107
00:04:05,958 --> 00:04:07,999
MYRTLE
DOESN'T THINK SO.
108
00:04:08,000 --> 00:04:09,707
SO HER FAMILY'S
NOT COMING?
109
00:04:09,708 --> 00:04:12,374
NO. SHE CALLED
STITCH UGLY
110
00:04:12,375 --> 00:04:14,124
AND LAUGHED AT US.
111
00:04:14,125 --> 00:04:15,124
LIKA POO CHIFA.
112
00:04:15,125 --> 00:04:17,957
OH, LILO.
THAT'S MEAN,
113
00:04:17,958 --> 00:04:19,874
MAKING FUN
OF HOW PEOPLE LOOK.
114
00:04:19,875 --> 00:04:20,957
BUT YOU JUST GOTTA-
115
00:04:20,958 --> 00:04:22,957
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
116
00:04:22,958 --> 00:04:24,415
ALOHA.
117
00:04:24,416 --> 00:04:25,624
OH, YEAH.
118
00:04:25,625 --> 00:04:26,832
THANKS
FOR CALLING BACK.
119
00:04:26,833 --> 00:04:28,999
I'M WONDERING IF
YOU'D BE INTERESTED
120
00:04:29,000 --> 00:04:31,499
IN DONATING
250 POUNDS OF POI.
121
00:04:31,500 --> 00:04:32,874
IT'S FOR CHARITY.
122
00:04:32,875 --> 00:04:35,874
COME ON, STITCH.
123
00:04:35,875 --> 00:04:38,708
[TAKING DEEP BREATHS]
124
00:04:41,958 --> 00:04:44,249
OH, GANTU,
I HOPE YOU DON'T MIND.
125
00:04:44,250 --> 00:04:46,582
SOME CHARITY ORGANIZATION
CAME AROUND
126
00:04:46,583 --> 00:04:48,249
ASKING FOR DONATIONS.
127
00:04:48,250 --> 00:04:49,290
I CAN'T HEAR YOU
BLABBING
128
00:04:49,291 --> 00:04:51,832
OVER MY DEEP,
CALMING BREATHS.
129
00:04:51,833 --> 00:04:53,999
[TAKES DEEP BREATH]
130
00:04:54,000 --> 00:04:56,832
SO I GAVE THEM YOUR BED
AND YOUR CLOTHES.
131
00:04:56,833 --> 00:04:59,957
OH, AND THAT STUFFED
TEDDY BEAR THING YOU SLEEP WITH.
132
00:04:59,958 --> 00:05:03,290
I AM AT PEACE!
133
00:05:03,291 --> 00:05:04,749
I CAN SEE THAT.
134
00:05:04,750 --> 00:05:06,457
Computerized voice:
WARNING.
135
00:05:06,458 --> 00:05:09,249
EXPERIMENT 322 ACTIVATED.
136
00:05:09,250 --> 00:05:10,332
PRIMARY FUNCTION-
137
00:05:10,333 --> 00:05:12,957
UNDERMINE ENEMY MORALE
WITH VERBAL ABUSE.
138
00:05:12,958 --> 00:05:14,457
VERBAL ABUSE?
139
00:05:14,458 --> 00:05:15,999
LIKE INSULTS?
140
00:05:16,000 --> 00:05:18,499
AN EXPERIMENT THAT
DOESN'T MELT, BLOW UP, OR IMPLODE ANYTHING?
141
00:05:18,500 --> 00:05:21,750
LIKE STEALING CANDY
FROM A BABY.
142
00:05:24,625 --> 00:05:26,415
AHH. REFRESHING.
143
00:05:26,416 --> 00:05:27,499
ALL OUR CONDOMINIUMS
144
00:05:27,500 --> 00:05:29,874
FEATURE GRADE "A"
WATER FILTRATION SYSTEMS
145
00:05:29,875 --> 00:05:31,332
AND THE FABULOUS VIEWS
OF-
146
00:05:31,333 --> 00:05:34,290
FOR THE LOVE OF MIKE,
IS THAT A DEAD RAT ON YOUR HEAD?
147
00:05:34,291 --> 00:05:35,290
PARDON ME?
148
00:05:35,291 --> 00:05:36,290
DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT.
149
00:05:36,291 --> 00:05:38,290
MOST PEOPLE WON'T NOTICE
YOUR TOUPEE
150
00:05:38,291 --> 00:05:39,957
'CAUSE
THEY'LL BE BLINDED
151
00:05:39,958 --> 00:05:41,457
BY THAT TACKY SHIRT!
152
00:05:41,458 --> 00:05:44,125
[LAUGHTER]
153
00:05:45,208 --> 00:05:47,875
IT IS GOOD TO BE ME.
154
00:05:48,458 --> 00:05:52,582
AND WHAT IS THE DEAL
WITH THOSE TRICKY SHARKS AND DOLPHINS?
155
00:05:52,583 --> 00:05:53,749
THEY LOOK EXACTLY ALIKE
156
00:05:53,750 --> 00:05:55,874
EXCEPT ONE WILL SWIM YOU
TO SAFETY
157
00:05:55,875 --> 00:05:57,999
AND ONE WILL EAT YOU ALIVE.
158
00:05:58,000 --> 00:06:01,583
CAN WE GET A WARNING SIGN
OR SOMETHING?
159
00:06:02,416 --> 00:06:04,707
THAT'S IT.
THAT'S THE PUNCH LINE.
160
00:06:04,708 --> 00:06:06,874
YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE
LAUGHING NOW.
161
00:06:06,875 --> 00:06:07,957
COME ON, EVERYBODY,
162
00:06:07,958 --> 00:06:09,999
NOW LAUGHING. HA HA!
163
00:06:10,000 --> 00:06:11,999
BUT IT WASN'T FUNNY.
164
00:06:12,000 --> 00:06:13,165
BUT I CONSTRUCTED THE JOKE
165
00:06:13,166 --> 00:06:15,207
WITH A PROPER SETUP
OF PUNCH LINE FORMAT.
166
00:06:15,208 --> 00:06:18,374
IT WAS BASED
ON PERSONAL EXPERIENCE.
167
00:06:18,375 --> 00:06:19,957
STILL NOT FUNNY.
168
00:06:19,958 --> 00:06:21,457
OK, OK, I GET IT!
169
00:06:21,458 --> 00:06:23,290
STILL, BY ALL
TECHNICAL MEASURES,
170
00:06:23,291 --> 00:06:25,874
MY JOKES SHOULD BE FUNNY.
171
00:06:25,875 --> 00:06:27,874
GUESS I'M JUST
MISSING SOMETHING.
172
00:06:27,875 --> 00:06:29,582
THIS CALLS FOR...
173
00:06:29,583 --> 00:06:31,457
EARLY RETIREMENT?
PEBOOZ.
174
00:06:31,458 --> 00:06:34,249
NO! MORE RESEARCH!
175
00:06:34,250 --> 00:06:36,999
PERHAPS JUMBA
WILL CREATE EVIL GENIUS DEVICE
176
00:06:37,000 --> 00:06:40,290
TO REPLACE
STAND-UP ACT.
177
00:06:40,291 --> 00:06:41,957
PLEAKLEY'S HOPELESS.
178
00:06:41,958 --> 00:06:43,457
I WISH WE COULD
HELP HIM,
179
00:06:43,458 --> 00:06:45,207
BUT I DON'T HAVE
THE SLIGHTEST CLUE
180
00:06:45,208 --> 00:06:46,749
ABOUT HOW TO BE FUNNY.
181
00:06:46,750 --> 00:06:48,249
MEEGA NAGA.
182
00:06:48,250 --> 00:06:50,624
COMIN' THROUGH!
183
00:06:50,625 --> 00:06:53,375
Both: HUH?
184
00:06:54,333 --> 00:06:56,208
HUH?
AHH!
185
00:06:56,209 --> 00:06:57,999
OUT OF MY WAY!
186
00:06:58,000 --> 00:07:01,207
I'VE GOT AN
EXPERIMENT TO CATCH.
187
00:07:01,208 --> 00:07:03,166
COME ON!
188
00:07:05,367 --> 00:07:07,165
NICE "D,"
189
00:07:07,166 --> 00:07:09,707
OR SHOULD I SAY "D" MINUS?
190
00:07:09,708 --> 00:07:11,874
EXCUSE ME. PARDON ME.
191
00:07:11,875 --> 00:07:13,707
EXCUSE ME, SIR...
192
00:07:13,708 --> 00:07:14,707
I MEAN MADAM.
193
00:07:14,708 --> 00:07:16,999
[FOOTSTEPS]
WHOA!
194
00:07:17,000 --> 00:07:18,958
AAH!
195
00:07:22,708 --> 00:07:24,582
? MISSED ME,
MISSED ME ?
196
00:07:24,583 --> 00:07:26,957
? NOW YOU GOTTA
KISS ME ?
197
00:07:26,958 --> 00:07:27,707
BUT WHOO!
198
00:07:27,708 --> 00:07:29,707
TRY A BREATH MINT FIRST.
199
00:07:29,708 --> 00:07:31,625
QUIET, FREAK!
200
00:07:36,875 --> 00:07:40,207
UHH!
201
00:07:40,208 --> 00:07:41,457
HA HA HA!
202
00:07:41,458 --> 00:07:42,874
IF I WERE YOU,
I'D BE TRYING
203
00:07:42,875 --> 00:07:44,290
TO BURY
MY UGLY MUG, TOO.
204
00:07:44,291 --> 00:07:47,332
HEY, HE'S MEAN,
AND IT'S FUNNY.
205
00:07:47,333 --> 00:07:48,957
[LAUGHS]
206
00:07:48,958 --> 00:07:50,249
GRR!
207
00:07:50,250 --> 00:07:51,999
WHY, YOU LITTLE-
208
00:07:52,000 --> 00:07:53,499
YOU GUYS GET A LOAD
OF THAT SWING?
209
00:07:53,500 --> 00:07:56,624
LOOKS LIKE YOUR MUG
AIN'T THE ONLY UGLY THING AROUND HERE.
210
00:07:56,625 --> 00:07:57,874
AND WHAT'S
WITH THAT UNIFORM?
211
00:07:57,875 --> 00:07:59,957
YOU PRETENDING
TO BE A COP OR SOMETHING?
212
00:07:59,958 --> 00:08:01,957
WELL, NO. WELL, I'M-
213
00:08:01,958 --> 00:08:03,499
NOT A COP, MY MISTAKE.
214
00:08:03,500 --> 00:08:05,374
COPS ARE SMART AND BRAVE.
215
00:08:05,375 --> 00:08:07,832
YOU'RE OBVIOUSLY THE MAYOR.
216
00:08:07,833 --> 00:08:08,582
THE WHAT?
217
00:08:08,583 --> 00:08:11,290
THE MAYOR
OF LOOSERVILLE!
218
00:08:11,291 --> 00:08:12,207
AHH!
219
00:08:12,208 --> 00:08:13,499
COME ON!
220
00:08:13,500 --> 00:08:14,874
DON'T WORRY
ABOUT STITCH.
221
00:08:14,875 --> 00:08:16,207
HE'LL CATCH UP.
222
00:08:16,208 --> 00:08:18,207
YOU REALLY
TOLD GANTU OFF.
223
00:08:18,208 --> 00:08:19,124
YOU'RE FUNNY.
224
00:08:19,125 --> 00:08:21,415
I THINK I'LL CALL YOU
"HECKLER."
225
00:08:21,416 --> 00:08:23,749
WHO DIED AND MADE YOU
NAME-GIVER?
226
00:08:23,750 --> 00:08:25,082
NOBODY.
227
00:08:25,083 --> 00:08:26,499
IT'S, LIKE, MY JOB.
228
00:08:26,500 --> 00:08:28,957
WELL, MAYBE
YOU SHOULD BE FIRED.
229
00:08:28,958 --> 00:08:29,957
AHH!
230
00:08:29,958 --> 00:08:31,082
STITCH!
231
00:08:31,083 --> 00:08:32,749
BE NICE TO HECKLER.
232
00:08:32,750 --> 00:08:33,707
HE CAN HELP US
FIGURE OUT
233
00:08:33,708 --> 00:08:36,207
HOW TO SAVE
PLEAKLEY'S COMEDY ACT.
234
00:08:36,208 --> 00:08:38,457
BUT FIRST,
I'M CURIOUS TO SEE
235
00:08:38,458 --> 00:08:41,832
HOW HE HANDLES
A CERTAIN SOMEONE,
236
00:08:41,833 --> 00:08:44,290
SOMEONE WHOSE NAME
STARTS WITH AN "M"
237
00:08:44,291 --> 00:08:48,208
AND ENDS WITH AN "YRTLE."
238
00:08:55,291 --> 00:08:57,999
WHAT DO YOU WANT,
WEIRD-LO?
239
00:08:58,000 --> 00:09:00,832
OH, NOT MUCH.
JUST A GOOD LAUGH.
240
00:09:00,833 --> 00:09:02,832
DO YOUR THING,
HECKLER.
241
00:09:02,833 --> 00:09:05,582
WOW. I DON'T KNOW
WHERE TO START.
242
00:09:05,583 --> 00:09:08,082
IS THE CLOWN
STILL CHASING YOU?
243
00:09:08,083 --> 00:09:09,457
WHAT CLOWN?
244
00:09:09,458 --> 00:09:13,707
THE ONE YOU STOLE
THAT FRIGHT WIG YOU CALL HAIR FROM.
245
00:09:13,708 --> 00:09:14,999
AND THOSE GLASSES.
246
00:09:15,000 --> 00:09:18,874
LET ME GUESS. YOU'RE GOING
FOR A CAREER IN WELDING?
247
00:09:18,875 --> 00:09:20,750
Both: HA HA!
248
00:09:21,875 --> 00:09:23,290
YOU CALL THIS HOME?
249
00:09:23,291 --> 00:09:24,999
IF YOU LOOK UP SHANTY
IN THE DICTIONARY,
250
00:09:25,000 --> 00:09:26,457
THERE'S A PICTURE
OF THIS PLACE.
251
00:09:26,458 --> 00:09:28,874
I'VE SEEN
NICER CARDBOARD BOXES
252
00:09:28,875 --> 00:09:29,707
ON SKID ROW.
253
00:09:29,708 --> 00:09:31,874
BACK OFF, STITCH.
HE'S RIGHT.
254
00:09:31,875 --> 00:09:33,874
OUR HOUSE
IS KIND OF A DUMP.
255
00:09:33,875 --> 00:09:35,332
I KNOW THAT YOU'RE
DONATING THE TABLES
256
00:09:35,333 --> 00:09:36,832
OUT OF THE KINDNESS
OF YOUR HEART,
257
00:09:36,833 --> 00:09:38,832
BUT WE EXPECT
A LARGE TURNOUT,
258
00:09:38,833 --> 00:09:40,874
AND WE NEED MORE THAN 2.
259
00:09:40,875 --> 00:09:42,499
SO IF YOU COULD-
260
00:09:42,500 --> 00:09:44,582
HELLO?
261
00:09:44,583 --> 00:09:46,500
UHH!
262
00:09:46,501 --> 00:09:48,415
SOMEBODY NEEDS
TO BE INTRODUCED
263
00:09:48,416 --> 00:09:52,290
TO A LITTLE CONCEPT
CALLED ANGER MANAGEMENT.
264
00:09:52,291 --> 00:09:54,082
OH, GREAT. WHAT'S THIS ONE?
265
00:09:54,083 --> 00:09:56,874
UNLESS IT'S A CHARITY EVENT
ORGANIZER EXPERIMENT,
266
00:09:56,875 --> 00:09:58,999
I DON'T THINK I'M IN THE MOOD.
267
00:09:59,000 --> 00:10:00,749
NANI, THIS IS HECKLER.
268
00:10:00,750 --> 00:10:02,582
HECKLER, THIS IS NANI.
269
00:10:02,583 --> 00:10:04,165
HOW DO YOU DO,
HIPPO HIPS?
270
00:10:04,166 --> 00:10:05,582
WHAT DID HE SAY?
271
00:10:05,583 --> 00:10:06,707
HA HA!
272
00:10:06,708 --> 00:10:08,832
THAT'S A GOOD ONE,
HECKLER.
273
00:10:08,833 --> 00:10:09,832
AND WHY ARE YOU
LAUGHING?
274
00:10:09,833 --> 00:10:12,749
IT'S FUNNY
BECAUSE IT'S TRUE.
275
00:10:12,750 --> 00:10:15,290
YOU DO HAVE HIPPO HIPS.
276
00:10:15,291 --> 00:10:16,249
WHAT?!
277
00:10:16,250 --> 00:10:18,165
DID I JUST HEAR
WHAT I'M THINKING?
278
00:10:18,166 --> 00:10:20,832
EXPERIMENT 322,
IS THAT YOU?
279
00:10:20,833 --> 00:10:22,874
YOU LOOK GOOD.
280
00:10:22,875 --> 00:10:23,874
SO DO YOU,
281
00:10:23,875 --> 00:10:24,874
IF BY "GOOD"
282
00:10:24,875 --> 00:10:27,582
YOU MEAN BALD,
FOUR-EYED, AND UGLY.
283
00:10:27,583 --> 00:10:28,624
HA HA HA!
284
00:10:28,625 --> 00:10:30,332
YES, THAT'S 322, ALL RIGHT.
285
00:10:30,333 --> 00:10:32,874
THE PROGRAM TO DESTROY
ENEMY'S SELF-CONFIDENCE
286
00:10:32,875 --> 00:10:35,707
BY MERCILESSLY TAUNTING
AND HUMILIATING HIM-
287
00:10:35,708 --> 00:10:37,999
ONE OF THE BEST IDEAS
I'VE EVER HAD.
288
00:10:38,000 --> 00:10:40,874
MORE LIKE ONLY IDEA
YOU'VE EVER HAD,
289
00:10:40,875 --> 00:10:43,999
WHICH EXPLAINS WHY
YOU'RE LIVING ON THIS PODUNK PLANET
290
00:10:44,000 --> 00:10:45,207
WITH THESE LOSERS.
291
00:10:45,208 --> 00:10:48,000
[MUFFLED SHOUTING]
292
00:10:50,750 --> 00:10:53,707
GET RID OF THAT THING NOW!
293
00:10:53,708 --> 00:10:55,457
BUT HE'S FUNNY.
294
00:10:55,458 --> 00:10:57,582
[MUFFLED SHOUTING]
295
00:10:57,583 --> 00:10:59,874
YOU TASTE LIKE OLD SOCK!
296
00:10:59,875 --> 00:11:02,625
OHH! NAGA TOTO.
297
00:11:03,083 --> 00:11:05,874
LILO, MAKING FUN
OF PEOPLE'S SHORTCOMINGS
298
00:11:05,875 --> 00:11:08,165
NOT ONLY ISN'T FUNNY,
299
00:11:08,166 --> 00:11:09,499
IT ISN'T NICE.
300
00:11:09,500 --> 00:11:12,707
YOU JUST DON'T HAVE
A SENSE OF HUMOR.
301
00:11:12,708 --> 00:11:14,290
LOOK, I DON'T HAVE TIME
TO ARGUE ABOUT THIS NOW.
302
00:11:14,291 --> 00:11:18,124
YOU KEEP THAT THING
OUT OF MY SIGHT UNTIL AFTER THE EVENT.
303
00:11:18,125 --> 00:11:19,958
GOT IT?
304
00:11:21,291 --> 00:11:24,165
HELLO? ABOUT THOSE 2 TABLES,
305
00:11:24,166 --> 00:11:25,415
I WAS THINKING ABOUT IT,
306
00:11:25,416 --> 00:11:29,874
AND THEY'RE JUST
THE PERFECT SIZE FOR MY EVENT.
307
00:11:29,875 --> 00:11:30,874
WHERE'S PLEAKLEY?
308
00:11:30,875 --> 00:11:34,999
OUTSIDE PRACTICING
UN-COMEDY ROUTINE.
309
00:11:35,000 --> 00:11:38,082
AND YOU, SIR,
WHERE ARE YOU FROM?
310
00:11:38,083 --> 00:11:39,999
OH, WASHINGTON. REALLY?
311
00:11:40,000 --> 00:11:43,499
THE STATE, THE CITY,
OR THE DEAD PRESIDENT?
312
00:11:43,500 --> 00:11:46,749
HEE HEE! DEAD PRESIDENT.
313
00:11:46,750 --> 00:11:48,499
WHERE'D THIS GUY
LEARN COMEDY?
314
00:11:48,500 --> 00:11:49,624
A FUNERAL PARLOR?
315
00:11:49,625 --> 00:11:51,832
'CAUSE HE'S GONNA
DIE OUT THERE.
316
00:11:51,833 --> 00:11:53,707
CAN YOU HELP HIM?
317
00:11:53,708 --> 00:11:55,457
THERE'S ONLY ONE THING
I CAN THINK OF
318
00:11:55,458 --> 00:12:00,374
THAT'LL MAKE THIS GUY'S
STAND-UP FUN TO WATCH.
319
00:12:00,375 --> 00:12:01,999
TOMATOES?
320
00:12:02,000 --> 00:12:03,415
ADABA.
321
00:12:03,416 --> 00:12:05,707
EVER SINCE
THE FIRST LOOSER SLIPPED ON A BANANA PEEL,
322
00:12:05,708 --> 00:12:06,999
COMEDY'S BEEN
ALL ABOUT LAUGHING
323
00:12:07,000 --> 00:12:09,874
AT OTHER PEOPLE'S
EXPENSE, RIGHT?
324
00:12:09,875 --> 00:12:10,874
I GUESS.
325
00:12:10,875 --> 00:12:11,832
SO IF A GUY'S JOKES
AREN'T FUNNY,
326
00:12:11,833 --> 00:12:13,874
YOU CAN AT LEAST
GET A YUK OR TWO
327
00:12:13,875 --> 00:12:15,957
OUT OF THROWING
TOMATOES AT HIM.
328
00:12:15,958 --> 00:12:17,082
I DON'T KNOW.
329
00:12:17,083 --> 00:12:19,874
THESE ARE PRETTY BIG.
THEY COULD HURT.
330
00:12:19,875 --> 00:12:22,874
THAT'S WHY YOU USE
THE ROTTEN ONES, GENIUS.
331
00:12:22,875 --> 00:12:27,625
WELL...YOU'RE
THE COMEDY EXPERT.
332
00:12:31,250 --> 00:12:33,290
PLATE, FLATWARE,
333
00:12:33,291 --> 00:12:35,375
ROTTEN TOMATO.
334
00:12:36,291 --> 00:12:38,707
PLATE, FLATWARE,
335
00:12:38,708 --> 00:12:41,875
ROTTEN TOMATO.
336
00:12:42,833 --> 00:12:44,583
POCHEEFA.
337
00:12:45,333 --> 00:12:46,999
LILO, WHAT
ARE YOU DOING?
338
00:12:47,000 --> 00:12:47,999
DON'T WORRY, NANI.
339
00:12:48,000 --> 00:12:50,749
EVERYTHING'S PERFECTLY
UNDER CONTROL,
340
00:12:50,750 --> 00:12:53,207
THANKS TO HECKLER.
341
00:12:53,208 --> 00:12:56,332
[SOBS]
I QUIT!
342
00:12:56,333 --> 00:12:59,457
LEILANI, WAIT!
I DON'T UNDERSTAND!
343
00:12:59,458 --> 00:13:00,582
WHAT HAPPENED?
344
00:13:00,583 --> 00:13:01,957
I'VE BEEN TRYING
TO LOSE WEIGHT,
345
00:13:01,958 --> 00:13:06,124
BUT THIS APRON
MAKES ME LOOK LIKE A BIG, FAT PENGUIN!
346
00:13:06,125 --> 00:13:08,207
WHAT?! SAYS WHO?
347
00:13:08,208 --> 00:13:09,290
I'M QUITTING, TOO.
348
00:13:09,291 --> 00:13:12,124
THIS HAT DOES MAKE ME
LOOK LIKE A DWEEB.
349
00:13:12,125 --> 00:13:15,082
MAN, THESE PEOPLE
ARE TOO EASY.
350
00:13:15,083 --> 00:13:17,124
TALK ABOUT LOW SELF-ESTEEM.
351
00:13:17,125 --> 00:13:19,707
WHO'S NEXT? I'M ON A ROLL.
352
00:13:19,708 --> 00:13:20,707
LILO!
353
00:13:20,708 --> 00:13:22,999
I SPENT 3 DAYS
TRYING TO PULL TOGETHER
354
00:13:23,000 --> 00:13:24,082
A CREW FOR THIS,
355
00:13:24,083 --> 00:13:25,874
AND YOUR EXPERIMENT
IS INSULTING THEM
356
00:13:25,875 --> 00:13:27,415
RIGHT OUT THE DOOR!
357
00:13:27,416 --> 00:13:29,874
BUT HE MAKES ME LAUGH.
358
00:13:29,875 --> 00:13:31,165
NOT HARD TO DO,
SMALL FRY.
359
00:13:31,166 --> 00:13:34,707
YOU'RE GIGGLIER THAN 2 PACKS
OF LAUGHING HYENAS.
360
00:13:34,708 --> 00:13:35,749
HEY!
361
00:13:35,750 --> 00:13:37,624
BUT GIGGLING BEATS
THAT WHINE OF YOURS.
362
00:13:37,625 --> 00:13:39,874
"STIIITCH!" OUCH.
363
00:13:39,875 --> 00:13:41,415
FINGERNAILS
MEET BLACKBOARD.
364
00:13:41,416 --> 00:13:43,290
BLACKBOARD,
FINGERNAILS.
365
00:13:43,291 --> 00:13:45,124
OH, AND
MRS. HASEGAWA CALLED.
366
00:13:45,125 --> 00:13:46,332
SHE WANTS THAT POTATO
367
00:13:46,333 --> 00:13:48,124
YOU'RE USING
FOR A NOSE BACK.
368
00:13:48,125 --> 00:13:49,874
THAT'S NOT FUNNY.
369
00:13:49,875 --> 00:13:51,624
TYPICAL.
IT'S ONLY FUNNY
370
00:13:51,625 --> 00:13:52,832
WHEN IT'S
THE OTHER GUY.
371
00:13:52,833 --> 00:13:54,874
WELL,
IT'S BEEN REAL,
372
00:13:54,875 --> 00:13:56,707
BUT I GOTTA RUN.
373
00:13:56,708 --> 00:13:58,874
GET HIM, STITCH.
374
00:13:58,875 --> 00:13:59,832
FINALLY.
375
00:13:59,833 --> 00:14:00,874
[CRASH]
376
00:14:00,875 --> 00:14:02,374
ALL RIGHT, EARTH FORMS,
377
00:14:02,375 --> 00:14:03,874
HAND OVER THE TROG.
378
00:14:03,875 --> 00:14:05,999
PERFECT.
YOU KNOW WHAT?
379
00:14:06,000 --> 00:14:08,707
YOU WANT HIM?
TAKE HIM!
380
00:14:08,708 --> 00:14:09,582
NANI, NO!
381
00:14:09,583 --> 00:14:10,874
HE'S OHANA.
382
00:14:10,875 --> 00:14:13,999
WE HAVE TO FIND
HIS ONE TRUE PLACE.
383
00:14:14,000 --> 00:14:15,165
WE CAN'T JUST-
384
00:14:15,166 --> 00:14:16,457
Heckler:
AGAIN WITH THE OHANA
385
00:14:16,458 --> 00:14:18,082
AND THE ONE TRUE PLACE!
386
00:14:18,083 --> 00:14:22,124
I SEE YOU'VE READ
THE DICTIONARY OF 2 PHRASES COVER TO COVER.
387
00:14:22,125 --> 00:14:24,707
TAKE HIM.
388
00:14:24,708 --> 00:14:26,416
GLADLY.
389
00:14:27,708 --> 00:14:30,499
YOU TWO DESERVE
EACH OTHER!
390
00:14:30,500 --> 00:14:31,707
STITCH, FIX THE DOOR
391
00:14:31,708 --> 00:14:34,416
SO I CAN SLAM IT
ON THEM.
392
00:14:35,750 --> 00:14:38,708
[HAMMERING]
393
00:14:39,000 --> 00:14:40,290
AND FOR THE RECORD,
394
00:14:40,291 --> 00:14:44,833
MY NOSE DOES NOT
LOOK LIKE A POTATO!
395
00:14:47,833 --> 00:14:49,833
[MUFFLED SHOUTING]
396
00:14:50,416 --> 00:14:52,749
MAYOR OF LOOSERVILLE,
INDEED.
397
00:14:52,750 --> 00:14:54,457
MAYOR OF LOOSERVILLE.
398
00:14:54,458 --> 00:14:57,999
HA HA! THAT'S A GOOD ONE.
399
00:14:58,000 --> 00:14:59,332
DR. HAMSTERVIEL,
400
00:14:59,333 --> 00:15:01,749
I'VE FINALLY CAUGHT
AN EXPERIMENT.
401
00:15:01,750 --> 00:15:03,582
IT INSULTS PEOPLE.
402
00:15:03,583 --> 00:15:04,707
IS THAT ALL?!
403
00:15:04,708 --> 00:15:06,999
I AM PERFECTLY CAPABLE
OF INSULTING PEOPLE
404
00:15:07,000 --> 00:15:09,457
IN MY OWN GENIUS FASHION,
405
00:15:09,458 --> 00:15:11,957
YOU RUBBER-HEADED
RUBBER FISH THING!
406
00:15:11,958 --> 00:15:13,874
RUBBER-HEADED
RUBBER FISH?
407
00:15:13,875 --> 00:15:16,290
YOU CALL THAT
A GENIUS INSULT?
408
00:15:16,291 --> 00:15:19,457
I'VE SEEN BETTER DIGS
IN MY VEGETABLE GARDEN.
409
00:15:19,458 --> 00:15:21,874
WHAT?! WHAT DO YOU KNOW
ABOUT INSULTS,
410
00:15:21,875 --> 00:15:26,332
YOU WITH YOUR
TEETH AND GARISH...MARKING?
411
00:15:26,333 --> 00:15:27,415
WHAT'S THE "H"
STAND FOR?
412
00:15:27,416 --> 00:15:30,332
"HELP, I'VE GOT A TOWEL
AROUND MY NECK?"
413
00:15:30,333 --> 00:15:32,082
YOU'RE OVERLY TALKING,
OVER-TALKER!
414
00:15:32,083 --> 00:15:34,332
WELL, I COULD SEE
YOU'VE BEEN WORKING ON THE ACCENT.
415
00:15:34,333 --> 00:15:37,832
I ALMOST
UNDERSTOOD A WORD YOU SAID JUST NOW.
416
00:15:37,833 --> 00:15:39,207
[SHOUTS GIBBERISH]
417
00:15:39,208 --> 00:15:41,874
OH, NICE COMEBACK.
418
00:15:41,875 --> 00:15:43,207
YOU-YOU!
419
00:15:43,208 --> 00:15:44,999
[MOCKING]
I-I-I'M WONDERING
420
00:15:45,000 --> 00:15:45,999
WHAT ARE YOU ANYWAY?
421
00:15:46,000 --> 00:15:46,999
THE NAME
SAYS HAMSTER,
422
00:15:47,000 --> 00:15:49,375
BUT THE TAIL'S
ALL POODLE.
423
00:15:49,409 --> 00:15:51,499
GANTU!
424
00:15:51,500 --> 00:15:53,999
I DO NOT LIKE THIS
UNLIKABLE EXPERIMENT!
425
00:15:54,000 --> 00:15:55,999
SET HIM FREE!
SET HIM FREE!
426
00:15:56,000 --> 00:15:57,207
BUT I FINALLY-
427
00:15:57,208 --> 00:16:00,249
GO AHEAD, YOU SLOPPY
IMPERSONATOR OF A SLOB!
428
00:16:00,250 --> 00:16:03,874
[SIGHS]
YES, SIR.
429
00:16:03,875 --> 00:16:07,374
HA HA!
430
00:16:07,375 --> 00:16:08,582
HATE TO INSULT AND LEAVE.
431
00:16:08,583 --> 00:16:10,499
ACTUALLY, I LOVE IT.
432
00:16:10,500 --> 00:16:11,624
AH, TOO BAD.
433
00:16:11,625 --> 00:16:13,457
I COULD USE SOME
INSULT BACKUP AROUND HERE.
434
00:16:13,458 --> 00:16:15,457
SO, MR. MAYOR,
WHAT'S YOUR NEXT DECREE
435
00:16:15,458 --> 00:16:17,999
TO THE PEOPLE
OF LOOSERVILLE?
436
00:16:18,000 --> 00:16:19,374
GRR!
437
00:16:19,375 --> 00:16:21,957
I JUST FLEW IN FROM MAUI.
438
00:16:21,958 --> 00:16:24,582
I JUST FLEW IN
FROM MAUI.
439
00:16:24,583 --> 00:16:27,290
I JUST FLEW IN FROM MAUI.
440
00:16:27,291 --> 00:16:30,165
DOES MY NOSE REALLY
LOOK LIKE A POTATO?
441
00:16:30,166 --> 00:16:32,707
YOU CAN TELL ME
IF IT DOES.
442
00:16:32,708 --> 00:16:33,999
NO, OF COURSE NOT.
443
00:16:34,000 --> 00:16:35,165
WELL, MAYBE A LITTLE.
444
00:16:35,166 --> 00:16:36,832
BUT WHO SAYS
THAT'S A BAD THING?
445
00:16:36,833 --> 00:16:38,582
LOOK, CAN WE TALK
ABOUT THIS LATER?
446
00:16:38,583 --> 00:16:39,874
IT'S ALMOST TIME
FOR ME TO MEET
447
00:16:39,875 --> 00:16:41,832
MY SOON-TO-BE
ADORING PUBLIC.
448
00:16:41,833 --> 00:16:44,124
ARE YOU SURE
YOU WANT TO DO THIS?
449
00:16:44,125 --> 00:16:45,957
PEOPLE COULD
MAKE FUN OF YOU,
450
00:16:45,958 --> 00:16:47,957
AND IT'S NO FUN,
TRUST ME.
451
00:16:47,958 --> 00:16:49,165
OH, COME ON.
452
00:16:49,166 --> 00:16:50,832
IF NAMES ARE THE WORST THING
THEY THROW AT ME,
453
00:16:50,833 --> 00:16:52,374
I'LL BE FINE.
454
00:16:52,375 --> 00:16:53,999
THE TOMATOES!
455
00:16:54,000 --> 00:16:55,582
Nani: ALOHA, EVERYONE.
456
00:16:55,583 --> 00:16:57,832
I'D LIKE TO THANK YOU ALL
FOR COMING OUT
457
00:16:57,833 --> 00:16:59,457
AND SUPPORTING
THIS GREAT CHARITY.
458
00:16:59,458 --> 00:17:05,458
AND NOW, THE COMEDY STYLINGS
OF P.L. EAKLEY!
459
00:17:05,750 --> 00:17:07,249
THAT'S MY CUE!
460
00:17:07,250 --> 00:17:08,832
PLEAKLEY, WAIT!
461
00:17:08,833 --> 00:17:10,499
GOOD EVENING,
LADIES AND GERMS,
462
00:17:10,500 --> 00:17:12,207
I JUST FLEW IN FROM MAUI,
463
00:17:12,208 --> 00:17:13,874
AND, BOY, ARE MY ARMS TIRED.
464
00:17:13,875 --> 00:17:16,457
[CRICKETS CHIRPING]
465
00:17:16,458 --> 00:17:18,458
WHAT ARE CRICKETS
DOING HERE?
466
00:17:23,833 --> 00:17:26,874
THEY SAY THAT CHARITY
BEGINS AT HOME.
467
00:17:26,875 --> 00:17:30,457
SO WHAT ARE Y'ALL DOING HERE?
GO HOME!
468
00:17:30,458 --> 00:17:31,749
[MICROPHONE FEEDBACK]
469
00:17:31,750 --> 00:17:32,832
AHEM.
470
00:17:32,833 --> 00:17:35,750
PLEAKLEY'S DYING
OUT THERE.
471
00:17:36,375 --> 00:17:38,332
SO WHAT'S THE DEAL
WITH COCONUTS?
472
00:17:38,333 --> 00:17:41,082
THEY'RE NOT MADE OF COCOA
AND THEY'RE NOT NUTS,
473
00:17:41,083 --> 00:17:42,999
AND WHAT ABOUT PINEAPPLE?
474
00:17:43,000 --> 00:17:44,874
NEITHER PIE NOR APPLE.
475
00:17:44,875 --> 00:17:47,957
THIS LANGUAGE IS CRAZY!
476
00:17:47,958 --> 00:17:49,708
[FEEDBACK]
477
00:17:51,125 --> 00:17:54,165
HI. IS THIS THING WORKING?
478
00:17:54,166 --> 00:17:55,582
I KNOW I AM.
479
00:17:55,583 --> 00:17:59,332
SO, ANYONE HERE
FROM OUT OF TOWN?
480
00:17:59,333 --> 00:18:01,624
I AM!
481
00:18:01,625 --> 00:18:03,957
Lilo: OH, NO!
HECKLER'S BACK.
482
00:18:03,958 --> 00:18:06,165
HE'S GONNA RIP
PLEAKLEY TO SHREDS.
483
00:18:06,166 --> 00:18:07,457
WE HAVE TO DO SOMETHING
484
00:18:07,458 --> 00:18:09,499
BEFORE EVERYONE
STARTS PELTING HIM
485
00:18:09,500 --> 00:18:11,332
WITH ROTTEN TOMATOES.
486
00:18:11,333 --> 00:18:13,124
AND WHERE
ARE YOU FROM, SIR?
487
00:18:13,125 --> 00:18:15,250
AHH!
488
00:18:15,958 --> 00:18:17,999
HA HA! EXCUSE ME.
489
00:18:18,000 --> 00:18:19,707
OH, BOY,
THAT IS AN UGLY TIE.
490
00:18:19,708 --> 00:18:20,582
WHOA. PARDON ME.
491
00:18:20,583 --> 00:18:23,208
YEAH, YOU.
GET OUT OF THE WAY.
492
00:18:23,209 --> 00:18:25,457
PARDON ME. EXCUSE ME.
PARDON ME.
493
00:18:25,458 --> 00:18:27,165
WHOOPS. SORRY.
COMIN' THROUGH.
494
00:18:27,166 --> 00:18:28,833
[GASPS]
495
00:18:30,409 --> 00:18:32,457
UGH!
496
00:18:32,458 --> 00:18:36,416
STITCH, YOU'RE MAKING
A HUGE MESS!
497
00:18:37,375 --> 00:18:39,500
EWW!
498
00:18:41,708 --> 00:18:43,249
OHH.
499
00:18:43,250 --> 00:18:46,415
PAY NO ATTENTION
TO THE DISTURBANCE IN THE AUDIENCE, FOLKS.
500
00:18:46,416 --> 00:18:48,874
[SHOUTING]
501
00:18:48,875 --> 00:18:51,457
HA HA HA!
502
00:18:51,458 --> 00:18:52,999
WHOOPS.
503
00:18:53,000 --> 00:18:54,875
HEY!
504
00:18:55,708 --> 00:18:56,832
HA HA!
505
00:18:56,833 --> 00:18:57,749
[GASPS]
506
00:18:57,750 --> 00:18:59,749
SO A HORSE
WALKS INTO A BAR
507
00:18:59,750 --> 00:19:02,832
AND THE BARTENDER SAYS-
508
00:19:02,833 --> 00:19:04,874
HA HA HA!
509
00:19:04,875 --> 00:19:05,999
LILO'S RIGHT.
510
00:19:06,000 --> 00:19:08,332
WHO AM I KIDDING?
I'M NOT FUNNY.
511
00:19:08,333 --> 00:19:09,207
I'LL SAY!
512
00:19:09,208 --> 00:19:10,957
YOU'RE SO NOT FUNNY
THAT-
513
00:19:10,958 --> 00:19:13,165
THE ONLY THING FUNNY
ABOUT ME IS MY LOOKS.
514
00:19:13,166 --> 00:19:15,290
WHAT'S UP
WITH THIS HAIR?
515
00:19:15,291 --> 00:19:16,749
[LAUGHTER]
516
00:19:16,750 --> 00:19:18,707
OR SHOULD I SAY
LACK OF HAIR?
517
00:19:18,708 --> 00:19:21,457
I MEAN, MY SCALP'S SO SHINY
THAT WHEN I GO TO THE BEACH,
518
00:19:21,458 --> 00:19:25,499
THE GLINT
MAKES THE SEAGULLS CRASH.
519
00:19:25,500 --> 00:19:27,415
BUT WAIT,
THAT'S MY LINE.
520
00:19:27,416 --> 00:19:29,249
AND HAVE YOU EVER SEEN
A BIGGER EYE?
521
00:19:29,250 --> 00:19:31,415
WHY, THE OTHER DAY
I STARTED CRYING,
522
00:19:31,416 --> 00:19:34,125
THERE WAS A FLASH FLOOD.
523
00:19:41,291 --> 00:19:43,875
OH, YEAH? WELL-
524
00:19:46,750 --> 00:19:49,874
THAT LITTLE GIRL'S NOSE
LOOKS LIKE...
525
00:19:49,875 --> 00:19:50,874
A POTATO?
526
00:19:50,875 --> 00:19:52,874
YOU ALREADY TRIED
THAT ONE.
527
00:19:52,875 --> 00:19:53,707
AND YOU KNOW WHAT?
528
00:19:53,708 --> 00:19:55,415
YOU'RE RIGHT.
IT KIND OF DOES.
529
00:19:55,416 --> 00:19:56,749
[LAUGHTER]
530
00:19:56,750 --> 00:19:57,749
AND DOES THIS STUPID APRON
531
00:19:57,750 --> 00:20:01,207
MAKE ME LOOK
LIKE A PENGUIN OR WHAT?
532
00:20:01,208 --> 00:20:02,874
MY EARS ARE SO BIG,
533
00:20:02,875 --> 00:20:04,624
EVERY TIME I GO TO THE ZOO,
534
00:20:04,625 --> 00:20:07,457
THE ELEPHANTS
FOLLOW ME HOME.
535
00:20:07,458 --> 00:20:08,957
MY REAR'S SO BIG,
536
00:20:08,958 --> 00:20:10,249
I ONCE HIP-CHECKED A GUY
537
00:20:10,250 --> 00:20:12,957
ALL THE WAY TO OAHU.
538
00:20:12,958 --> 00:20:14,957
BUT I-YOU-
539
00:20:14,958 --> 00:20:16,165
I GOT NOTHING.
540
00:20:16,166 --> 00:20:20,957
[SOBBING]
541
00:20:20,958 --> 00:20:22,499
GOOD NIGHT, EVERYBODY!
TRY THE VEAL
542
00:20:22,500 --> 00:20:25,374
AND DON'T FORGET
TO TIP THE WAITRESSES.
543
00:20:25,375 --> 00:20:29,708
[CHEERING]
544
00:20:30,375 --> 00:20:31,874
PLEAKLEY,
YOU DID IT!
545
00:20:31,875 --> 00:20:32,999
THAT WAS SO FUNNY.
546
00:20:33,000 --> 00:20:35,457
YOU OUT HECKLED
HECKLER.
547
00:20:35,458 --> 00:20:36,707
WE ALL DID.
548
00:20:36,708 --> 00:20:38,624
I ALMOST FORGOT THE FIRST RULE
OF STAND-UP COMEDY:
549
00:20:38,625 --> 00:20:40,874
STICKS AND STONES
MAY BREAK YOUR BONES,
550
00:20:40,875 --> 00:20:42,374
BUT NAMES
WILL NEVER HURT YOU,
551
00:20:42,375 --> 00:20:44,999
UNLESS THEY'RE CARVED IN STONE
AND THROWN AT YOU.
552
00:20:45,000 --> 00:20:47,582
THAT'S
A PRETTY GOOD RULE FOR LIFE, TOO.
553
00:20:47,583 --> 00:20:50,707
IS THAT WHAT
YOU WERE TRYING TO TELL ME, NANI?
554
00:20:50,708 --> 00:20:52,457
SOMETHING LIKE THAT.
555
00:20:52,458 --> 00:20:53,832
BEING MEAN ISN'T FUNNY.
556
00:20:53,833 --> 00:20:55,749
IT JUST GETS PEOPLE
MAD AT YOU.
557
00:20:55,750 --> 00:20:59,457
I GUESS HECKLER'S GOING
TO HAVE TO LEARN THAT.
558
00:20:59,458 --> 00:21:02,082
[SOBBING]
559
00:21:02,083 --> 00:21:04,624
I'M ALL ALONE
IN THE WORLD.
560
00:21:04,625 --> 00:21:06,582
YOU'RE NOT ALONE
IN THE WORLD.
561
00:21:06,583 --> 00:21:07,749
ALL WE HAVE TO DO NOW
562
00:21:07,750 --> 00:21:10,832
IS FIND
THE ONE TRUE PLACE WHERE YOU BELONG,
563
00:21:10,833 --> 00:21:13,999
SOMEWHERE WHERE PEOPLE
EXPECT TO GET HECKLED.
564
00:21:14,000 --> 00:21:15,082
HELLO!
565
00:21:15,083 --> 00:21:16,457
FINALLY, JUMBA
HAS ARRIVED
566
00:21:16,458 --> 00:21:19,999
WITH HIS CONTRIBUTION
TO LARGER GIRL'S CHARITY.
567
00:21:20,000 --> 00:21:21,457
OF COURSE,
I'VE FIGURED OUT A WAY
568
00:21:21,458 --> 00:21:24,124
TO ADD A LITTLE EVIL
TO IT. HA HA!
569
00:21:24,125 --> 00:21:28,165
WELL, THIS
WORKS OUT NICELY.
570
00:21:28,166 --> 00:21:29,332
[BLOWS RASPBERRY]
571
00:21:29,333 --> 00:21:30,874
YOU CALL THAT A PITCH?
572
00:21:30,875 --> 00:21:32,999
YOU THROW
LIKE A LITTLE GIRL.
573
00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:34,082
I AM A LITTLE GIRL,
574
00:21:34,083 --> 00:21:36,290
AND I'M ONLY HERE
'CAUSE LILO CALLED ME
575
00:21:36,291 --> 00:21:40,875
AND TOLD ME HOW TO
GET BACK AT YOU, FREAK!
576
00:21:46,366 --> 00:21:49,207
AT LEAST
I FINALLY GOT MYRTLE
577
00:21:49,208 --> 00:21:51,374
TO COME
TO THE CHARITY DINNER.
578
00:21:51,375 --> 00:21:54,582
SORRY I MADE FUN
OF YOUR HIPPO HIPS.
579
00:21:54,583 --> 00:21:55,582
NO PROBLEM.
580
00:21:55,583 --> 00:21:59,749
I LOVE MY HIPS,
POTATO NOSE.
581
00:21:59,750 --> 00:22:01,833
[LAUGHING]
582
00:22:01,883 --> 00:22:06,433
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