Original subtitles

THE '80s HAVE JUST BEGUN.

RULED BY THE PARTY SECRETARIES,

POLAND IS DEVELOPING RAPIDLY.

HOWEVER, A GROUP OF AGITATORS DESTABILIZES THE STATE.

IMPOSSIBLE TO EXPLAIN THINGS ARE HAPPENING

AT THE POLISH-SOVIET BORDER.

THE EVENTS WE ARE ABOUT TO SHOW

REALLY HAPPENED…

OR RATHER, COULD HAVE REALLY HAPPENED…

THE WAVE - ELECTRONICS REPAIR SHOP ZBIGNIEW SOKOLIK

…military maneuvers have been seen on…

…ground troops and armored vehicles…

…first regiment Polish army…

Weather forecast for the region. Windy…

Weather forecast for the region.

…armed forces… …centers around the…

PROJECT UFO

Ladies and gentlemen, it is my honor to introduce to you today…

FARMERS COOPERATIVE OF WARMIA

…Poland's leading authority on UFOs and the celebrated host of the TV show

Close Encounters.

The show that scientifically examines UFO sightings.

Please welcome Jan Polgar.

Morning, everyone. Thank you.

Mr. Polgar has also accepted

to stay with us after our conference to share his thoughts

and to sign copies of his latest bestseller,

Unidentified Objects: Truth or Hoax.

Copies of the book will be available for sale after the conference.

Ladies and gentlemen, get ready for a busy day!

We will start off with a presentation on UFOs in the Middle Ages.

"Were the Albigensians in contact with ufonauts?"

THE FIRST UFO CONVENTION WARMIA

Followed by Mr. Gajewski.

-Followed by Mr. Gajewski! -Oh! That's me!

I couldn't hear him.

Mr. Gajewski will give his lecture on "Who built the Pyramids?"

We have something very special planned

for the very end as well.

A distinguished member of our Gaia society,

Zbigniew Sokolik,

who's been tracking UFOs in Warmia for years,

will give us a trail-blazing lecture titled:

"Submersible Not-Flying Objects."

It is absolutely feasible that thousands of years ago

members of an advanced alien civilization

established colonies at the bottom of the Atlantic Ocean

in the area known to us as the Bermuda Triangle,

which would explain the mysterious disappearances of ships

navigating in the area…

I'm sorry.

But it seems to me that

there is a much simpler explanation for all of this.

For example, the thousands of pirates.

I'm sorry. I couldn't help myself.

Zbyszek, please continue as you were. Thank you.

There is one fact I believe that we can all agree upon,

and that is that space travel takes a very, very long time.

And even if we conjecture that aliens can travel at the speed of light,

which, well… basically defies the laws of physics,

well, then, such a journey would take

thousands of years.

Therefore, the presence of aliens on Earth could only be accidental.

That is one reason I firmly believe

that the ufonauts that appear here on Earth

do not actually come from the cosmos,

but from the oceans.

If I may,

many experts acknowledge that aliens most likely come

from the dark side of the moon.

If that were the case, then how do you explain this?

Uh, lights please.

Next one.

This photograph… was one that I took recently.

I also have the original negative and several prints, of course.

Please take your time to examine them. Thank you.

This photo clearly shows a beam of light

coming from an Unidentified Submersible Object.

A USO exploring a nearby lake.

I encourage you all…

to meticulously examine the evidence I have presented.

Bear witness and behold this light.

For this light is…

a revelation.

There you go.

"To Zbigniew Sokolik. Hoping this book will be the, uh…"

The cornerstone.

"Hoping this book will be the cornerstone of our friendship. Jan Polgar."

It's an honor for me, sir.

And tell me, how would you feel about being a guest

on my television show, Close Encounters? Huh?

Me?

We could showcase your ideas.

Show your photo.

You do understand, we'll need the photo, the original negative, and the slide?

Yes, naturally.

We need to ensure they're authentic, obviously.

-I don't have anything to hide. -Good.

That's good to hear.

Mr. Sokolik…

I think it's only fair to let you know that, um…

…that I'm quite the skeptic.

I don't believe in revelations.

Do you believe in Roswell?

Hmm.

You see…

Roswell is Roswell.

This is Radio Warmia. Maurycy Toderak with Radio Warmia News.

The Fifth International Fair of Grains, Vegetables, and Pigs is coming to an end.

On the state farm's premises,

various stands from Poland, Czechoslovakia, Yugoslavia,

and the German Democratic Republic

have been offering their products for sale.

I don't trust this Sokolik guy.

He just handed you the photos?

…and personalities have been in attendance…

You don't trust anyone, baby.

He's just an ambitious geek.

Whatever you say.

Does he have any idea why you invited him to Warsaw?

Well, if he watches my show, then I'm sure he understands.

With the ongoing labor disputes,

today, the Farmers' Cooperative "Warmia"…

…and the workshops on its premises

have joined the nationwide strike.

POLISH UNITED WORKERS' PARTY

Hey, Kittel.

Hey.

Where is everyone?

There's a revolution. Haven't you noticed? Fires to put out.

-That bad? -Yeah, that bad.

Hey. Could you check…

Could you check this for me?

Take a look. Seems real.

I mean, it looks surprisingly genuine.

We've all been fuckin' swamped here, and you want me to--

Come on! Take a quick look.

-Just for you. -I'll grab some halva for Lenta, okay?

Help yourself.

Careful up there!

Alright.

A POGROM OF THE PARTY IS A POGROM OF THE NATION

You're back early.

We're almost done.

Go have your bath. Before they cut the water off on us.

Today's breaking news.

The Prime Minister has resigned from office citing health reasons.

Governance of the country will now be handled by the State Council

consisting of high-ranking officials from the ruling party.

The new Prime Minister will be nominated by the council shortly.

The new government has made an appeal for calm.

And now for some international news.

In the Soviet Socialist Republic of Lithuania,

joint military exercises are continuing between allied forces,

including regiments from…

Well, I'm glad I didn't hold my breath.

With all this shit with the Prime Minister, the city's a mess.

Darling, give me the yellow one, would you?

So?

Your thoughts?

Like I told you on the phone, no one's tampered with it.

The objects weren't resized.

So what does that mean? Is the photo authentic?

How the fuck should I know that?

-It's partially blurred. -Stop being a smart-ass, would you?

The shadows are a bit uneven,

which could indicate a light source out of frame.

Uh-huh.

However, it seems authentic.

Applause!

Wonderful! That's great! Keep smiling!

Like that lady over there, perfect! Just like that!

Welcome to Close Encounters!

Beautiful! Bravo, keep going!

Evening everyone. Good evening, nice to see you all.

-Good evening! -Everything all set?

-Nervous? -This is all very overwhelming.

Relax, there's no need to be nervous.

Mr. Sokolik,

don't think about the fact that all of Poland will be watching us.

Just think of this as a friendly conversation.

Jurek! Are we done with the sound check?

We're almost done, sir.

-Get on with it. -We're good! Everything's fine!

It doesn't seem fine.

Please get out of the way. Hurry.

Thank you.

CLOSE ENCOUNTERS

So what you are suggesting

is that ufonauts don't come from outer space, right?

-But from underwater? -Yes.

Uh… the problem is that…

How can I put it… The question is…

um…

Well, you know, what I'm really trying to say is…

Uh, the heart of the issue has to do

with the method of travel adopted by the aliens.

-Mm-hm. -Uh, you see…

the universe is billions of light years wide, which implies that…

uh… I mean…

It makes space travel basically impossible.

What about the existence of… wormholes or space tunnels?

Even if that is the case, journeys of this magnitude

would take a very long time.

And that is one of the reasons

that… mm…

What I'm trying to say is, uh, because…

their presence here on the planet

has been so constant over the millennia,

that is why I firmly believe

that aliens are living under the ocean,

under the Atlantic, near Bermuda.

Quite far away. That's a pity.

Why not somewhere like Bornholm? For example.

Well, actually…

it just so happens that…

Uh…

I have designed something.

I have invented a device

that has allowed me to make contact with them.

To make contact with the underwater ufonauts?

Yes.

I'm sorry, just to make sure I understand correctly.

You're saying that you have invented a device to communicate with aliens?

-Yes. -Yes? That's incredible!

And?

-Have they contacted you? -Yes and no.

However, you have taken a picture of them.

That's correct.

With your permission, I'll show it to the audience.

Zoom in please.

If you don't mind, could you explain to us what we're seeing in this photo?

Of course, yes.

Uh… This particular picture…

Well, this, I believe shows the headlights of an Unidentified Submersible Object.

Right there on lake Krywe.

This ufonaut doesn't seem to know his way to Bermuda.

Have you considered that this photo may be evidence of something else?

The aurora? Or maybe a rocket or an amphibious vehicle?

As you know, there are military exercises on our borders.

-It's a USO. -A… USO?

An Unidentified Submersible Object. What I call a USO.

To be honest, at first glance…

…the photo does seem genuine.

There are no signs of editing or montage.

However, when you take a closer look, then you can clearly see

that these shadows here are laid out at an unnatural angle.

And that headlight you mentioned

seems to be superimposed on the image

and does not appear to originate from underwater.

-In which case the… -No, that is not true.

Then, maybe, Mr. Sokolik,

you can explain to everyone why the photo is so blurred.

-So out of focus? -The photo is not fake.

I'm telling the truth.

Wait up, Zbigniew. That went well.

I don't think it did.

Don't be ridiculous. You're not angry, are you?

Television has its own set of rules. That's it.

Just who do you think you are, Mr. Polgar?

You may not believe me right now,

but I'm doing this for the good of our cause.

Well, you, sir, are not a true believer.

I don't want it to be a question of belief.

That's the whole point, Mr. Sokolik.

I have your slide.

And the negative. Thank you.

There isn't any point now. Just keep it.

Goodbye.

MAURYCY MAMZER'S HYPNOSIS

Miss Kitty?

Tell me. Did you save me some punch?

Of course I did. I'd do anything for you, Mr. Polgar.

Ah!

-There you go. -Cheers. Thank you.

May I join you?

Seen any Martians lately?

Unfortunately not.

-The universe remains silent. -I've got some news for you.

The Party Secretary is going on a field trip tomorrow.

A field trip? And why's that?

He's very busy with everything that's going on.

There's some information that I'd like to share with you.

But not here.

C'mon! Close the door!

It's probably the tube.

That's usually the issue with these Amethysts.

I'll order you a new one and fix it.

How much will that cost? A new tube?

I'll take care of it.

You need something else?

So, how was Warsaw?

It didn't go well.

The show was another farce.

The whole thing was just a set-up.

They treated me like a fool.

A set-up?

-So you're a big shot now? -What would you know about it?

Whatever, Zbyszek.

Let me know when you've fixed it.

What is it? Are you hungry?

Oh.

Sara?

Did you feed him?

Where's Sara?

I think she went outside to play.

Sara?

Sara!

Get away from there!

You know you're not allowed to go to the lake at night!

Where am I supposed to go?

Just don't go there! It's dark. Stay inside, okay?

I saw a bright light, and I wanted to see what it was.

They're probably just electrofishing, that's all.

I'm sorry.

Mm.

It's okay.

Another beer, please.

-Hi, Stefan. -Hi.

I saw you on Polgar's show.

It didn't turn out well.

Alright…

I'm off.

Don't worry about it.

We'll show him how it's done.

The bear has come for his honey.

Did you actually have something to tell me, or…

did you just want to show me your waterbed?

Don't push your luck, Janek.

What is it then?

You know I like you.

In fact, maybe I even care about you.

I kinda like the fact that you're… peculiar.

It's sweet.

There's a dark cloud hanging over you.

-Over me? -Yes. You know no one is untouchable.

And your status as a television star makes things somewhat complicated.

They wanna move Close Encounters to the morning line up.

And they wanna replace you with that hypnotist guy.

Oh, I forget his name.

Mamzer?

Mamzer.

That… I mean… He's an idiot.

He's… He's a… moron!

-He's an idiot! -He calms people down.

-Where have you been hiding, baby? -I was at work.

I was at the studio editing the new episode.

Really?

That's odd, because President Puchacz says…

he couldn't find you.

Hm. Probably because I was in the editing room.

Mm.

-What'd he want? -I'm not your secretary, you know?

Come on, give me a break!

I suppose I could do it, but then you'd have to pay me actual money.

Like when I do all the research and work for your books,

and you end up getting all of the credit.

Honey, you know exactly why we do it like that.

Do you know why?

-Yes. -Because I'm famous.

I know.

What the fuck is this?

How the fuck did this happen?

For fuck's sake. Lenta!

Lenta!

Do you like your new haircut, sweetie?

You're crazy.

You're completely out of your mind.

You were going bald anyway.

You're a total nut job, you know that?

You're crazy. You're completely fucking insane!

I work in television!

When have you ever seen a bald TV host?!

Don't you get it?!

Oh, don't worry, I get it.

You can fuck whoever you want, Janek, but don't you dare underestimate me.

I'm the one who made you everything that you are.

Pardon me?

Lenta, darling, I think you're a little confused.

Everything in this house, I mean everything, was bought by me.

With my money. Your dress…

-Kimono. -Kimono, Goddammit!

All this shit. The Buddhas, the candles, the fans.

The acupuncture and Chao, your Chinese masseur!

Everything you see.

Everything! The stupid Japanese garbage!

I paid for all your shit!

And you think I'm crazy. You're delusional.

-Don't worry about your hair. -Don't touch me!

If the Secretary's bald, then you can be too.

I'm not paying for your shit anymore.

Go fuck yourself.

Good morning, Mr. Polgar. The president's waiting for you.

-Yeah, I know, I heard. -Go ahead and wait inside.

Pss!

The drill is over. I repeat, the drill is over.

We've improved again by 14 seconds. That's a new record!

We're the best TV station in the whole Warsaw Pact!

Marian, cut the crap.

Tell me the truth.

Are you gonna move my show to the morning slot

when only kids are watching?

Are you really gonna give my prime-time TV slot to that hypnotizer?

Listen, Janek.

We have to talk.

Like professionals. Like adults.

Relax, take off your coat.

-Is this… Is this my coffee? -Yes. The way you like it.

Tastes different. Ugh.

What's with the hat? Are you an Orthodox Jew now?

Tell me the truth, Marian.

Come on, Jan, you know that your show makes no sense.

You spend your time roaming around Poland,

proving to everyone in the country what they already know.

That UFOs never land here.

For some reason, they always land in America.

Marian, you know that I'm a man of science.

You were once.

But now you're a TV host.

Can you take off your hat please? You're stressing me out.

For fuck's sake.

I'm asking you nicely.

My God, Janek, what happened?

Is it cancer?

Is it the chemotherapy?

How did Lenta take it?

-Lenta… -Say nothing. Janek, don't say a word.

Pss!

I understand.

We're gonna fight this together.

And when it comes to your show… that can wait.

The altered state of consciousness that is hypnosis

is a powerful experience open to every human being.

Each and every one of us is a vessel of infinite power.

Whatever your mind can focus upon

can then be made manifest in reality.

Your mind creates your own reality.

Ladies and gentlemen,

I invite you all to witness with your own eyes

the most powerful instrument in the universe…

the human brain.

The woman who lies before me is living proof

that our minds are capable of the impossible.

So you like Mamzer?

Remember, each and every one of us

is a vessel of infinite power.

Whatever your mind imagines

can be made manifest

and become your reality.

Polgar.

SECRETARY

You wanted to see me, Comrade Secretary?

Have a seat.

That letter was sent to my wife.

Read it, please.

Out loud.

"Dear Mrs. Wierusz,

I decided to contact you because I watch you on TV,

and I believe you to be trustworthy."

"What I am going to tell you may sound crazy,

but recently in the village of Truskasy,

near Bartoszyce, a man named Kunik

encountered strange green creatures that looked like frogs."

"Creatures like these have never been seen here before."

"I know this because I have lived in Warmia my entire life."

"These creatures then abducted Kunik and brought him to their spaceship."

"I believe this incident to be worthy of investigation by you and the authorities."

"My neighbor thinks that it may be the Chinese,

but I think it is more serious than that."

"I think that these creatures may be aliens."

"Yours sincerely, Helena Podgórska."

So what do you make of that?

-Interesting. -Interesting?

-It's fuckin' mind-blowing. -Sure. Yeah.

A revelation like that right here in Poland!

-Make the best of this shit. -Yes.

And make sure to be meticulous.

POLICE

Zbyszek.

You have to come with me to the station.

What for?

I don't know.

Probably something you did in Warsaw.

In Warsaw? Nothing happened.

Why are you always ranting about those USO?

You really should drop it.

Extension 5-0-1.

Borewicz, Corporal Borewicz.

Yes, he's here with me.

Sokolik speaking.

Yes…

Thank you, sir.

Thank you so much, sir, for trusting me with this mission.

Goodbye.

So?

That was Polgar. The guy from Close Encounters.

-Uh-huh. -Apparently in Truskasy…

they've seen a UFO.

Oh, Zbyszek… Uh…

Someone has to drive me there.

My husband's getting dressed, he'll be right down.

-Uh-huh. -You came about this thing?

About what thing?

What do you mean, what thing? Eh…

This thing.

Józef Kunik.

Good evening.

The testimony is credible. Stop.

You said then that they…

took you on board their vessel, right?

Yeah. It was down by the field.

They brought me on board their ship.

And you're sure they were not human?

I think I know what's human.

These people were not humans.

Not like people from around here.

The case is genuine and mysterious. Stop.

When he came back from the fields, I saw him.

He was as white as a sheet.

And he was soaked to the skin, like he'd been for a swim in the lake.

-Uh-huh. -I asked him there and then.

"Józef, what happened to you, darling?"

And he said to me…

…that he had just seen…

…these big, tall frogs in the fields.

-Sorry. -Down at Kulesza's field.

Had you been drinking, Mr. Kunik?

Never had a drop.

He doesn't touch the stuff.

The witness is a teetotaler.

There is no radio or TV in the household. Stop.

And what happened next?

Well, then, our son, he…

Your son?

Well, since his divorce, our son has been living with us.

-What did he see? -Well, he ran down to the field,

but all those frogs were gone.

Well, yeah. There were tracks.

What kind of tracks?

Like, uh, footprints.

Like, uh…

flippers.

The witness was abducted at dawn by the lake. Stop.

They came from underwater. Stop.

Do you believe in Roswell?

You see…

Roswell is Roswell.