Original subtitles

♪ Just the good ol' boys ♪

♪ Never meanin' no harm ♪

♪ Beats all you never saw ♪

♪ Been in trouble with the law ♪

♪ Since the day they was born ♪

♪ Straightenin' the curves ♪

♪ Flattenin' the hills ♪

♪ Someday the mountain might get 'em ♪

♪ But the law never will ♪

♪ Making their way ♪

♪ The only way they know how ♪

♪ That's just a little bit more ♪

♪ Than the law will allow ♪

♪ Just the good ol' boys ♪

♪ Wouldn't change if they could ♪

♪ Fightin' the system ♪

♪ Like a true modern-day Robin Hood ♪

- Yee-haw! - Yee-haw!

You know, frustration is a powerful emotion.

And if you're Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane of Hazzard County

you can get yourself a real first-class, mail-order

Sears and Roebuck, monkey ward education

on the topic.

'Oh, you.'

You did it!

Now you've made me mad.

How's he doin' now?

He's spinnin' his wheels like usual.

Uh-oh.

No.

Oh. Why, you.

Sort of pitiful, ain't it?

It was just startin' that night.

Boss Hogg was working late.

And Lulu brought him..

You call this dinner?

It is, iffin' you're to lose the weight

Doc Appleby says you gotta lose to pass your physical.

Oh, Doc Appleby! My physical!

Listen, I'm telling you there ain't enough here

to fill a cavity in my tooth..

Much less my stomach.

That's the whole idea, Jefferson so there's no use arguin'.

'And no cheatin' 'cause if you do'

I-I am gonna buy me a whole new wardrobe

for every single day you don't lose at least 1 pound.

- Hear? - Oh, I hear, I hear.

But what did Doc Appleby say about you?

He says I'm just right, he don't want me to get lookin' pekid.

Enos!

- Yes, sir, Mr. Hogg? - Listen.

You just run down to the Greasy Spoon, will you?

And fetch me back my after-dinner snack.

But, sir, you're supposed to be on a diet...

You're supposed to be a man I can trust.

I mean, a man I can send on a top-secret mission.

A man who will die with his lips sealed if he has to.

Alright, then go! That's an order.

Yes, sir, an order for at least four people.

Now, Boss' problems was just startin'

'cause that same night two armed and dangerous convicts

broke prison a few hundred miles away

and was headin' for Hazzard.

See, we made it.

You hear that, Herman?

We're free.

Will you stop talking to that damn cricket?

You act as though he's some sort of person or somethin'.

Herman's my friend.

Boy, you are nuts. You know it?

One wheel in the sand.

I took you with me 'cause you had this laundry detail.

Yeah, well, maybe I am nuts.

If it weren't for Herman and me

you'd still be back in the slammer.

Now, keepin' that cricket ain't so strange.

There's a fiddle player in Nashville

who keeps a mouse in his pocket.

But it's okay, the mouse can't hear.

It took Rosco till late that night to get back into town

'cause nobody wanted to give him a ride.

You know it's lonely at the top.

And the bad news, is they got away again.

Oh, dagblast it!

- Oh, Rosco. - What?

You know why I'm puttin' on so much weight?

'Cause you can't keep your fat little mouth shut.

No, no, no.

- No, it's frustration. - Oh.

That's what's making me eat.

Pure frustration over them Dukes.

- Yeah, well... - Yeah.

You know what they cost me this year alone.

Pokin' their noses into my business?

- Listen, I tell you what. - What?

If you can help me lose 300 pounds of Dukes

namely Bo and Luke, I swear I'll lose 50 pounds of J.D. Hogg.

- Well, you got a deal. - Oh, good.

Oh, I'm so proud of you, you little rat.

Well, what do we have here?

Uh, Enos, remember a man who will die with his lips sealed.

You know, if you'd kept your lips sealed

you wouldn't be on this diet.

- Let's see what we have here. - 'No, no, no!'

Oh, see.

'Shame, shame everybody knows your name.'

Alright, now hear this

'I am putting this chicken'

and these potatoes and these-and these hog jowls

are all under arrest.

I want you to take and stock 'em and chock 'em.

- No, no. - I mean, now!

- Yes, sir. - Don't let...

No, no, no! No, no, no!

You can't get your... 'Rosco.'

Ain't you got no heart?

Well, not right at this moment.

'We'll have to dump this truck and get some clothes.'

And clear away out of this state.

You got any ideas?

Guy I knew a while back was in the Marines with me.

'Lives on a farm near here.'

- A little burg called Hazzard. - It's nice to have a buddy.

Time of need.

He wasn't no buddy.

'He was my sergeant.'

Mr. Big Shot.

Always handing out orders like them guards back in the slammer.

You can betcha that Luke Duke's gonna start

taking orders from now on.

Goodness sakes! I'm comin'. I'm comin', I'm comin'!

Oh, stop leanin' on that thing, will you?

Stop leanin' on the bell.

I'm comin', I'm comin', I'm comin'!

Who's there, anyhow?

'Boss, it's Rosco.'

'And me too, Mr. Hogg.'

Come on in.

Enos, don't shove me like that I'm your superior officer.

Listen, you knuckleheads. You know what time it is?

- You know what time it is? - What is it? A guessing game?

Oh, for goodness' sake! It's the middle of the night.

What's so important as all this?

Boss, this is an emergency.

Yes, sir. Sheriff Little called...

Enos, will you hush it? Just zip it.

I am the superior officer. I give the report.

When you're superior officer you'll get to do reports.

Would you please tell me?

Well, there was an escape at the jail in Chickasaw County.

Yes, sir. You know this Sheriff Little?

He called and said that those escaped convicts

'may be headed this way.'

- Escaped convicts? - Headed this way?

Sheriff Little's drivin' down first thing in the mornin'

Oh, no, he ain't. Uh-uh.

- This ain't his jurisdiction. - 'Yes, that's what I told him.'

And then he said that the governor told him that

he was in charge of capturing those escaped convicts.

Meanwhile, he wants us to throw up roadblocks

everywhere we can.

Well, we can't go up against the governor.

No, that'd be bad politics. What are you waiting for?

Round up some volunteers, and get crackin' on them roadblocks.

- Yes, sir. Yes, sir. - No, no. Not you.

- No, you, you do that. - Me?

Yeah. You stand guard outside this house.

- I'm gone. - I'm here.

Yeah. Well, then get out there.

Go on.

- Uh. - Oh, J.D.

Oh, don't you worry none, lambikins.

You're perfectly safe.

Just go on upstairs to bed.

- Alright. - Go back to sleep.

Yeah. On second thought, I'll just check and make sure

everything's locked up tight.

What's that? What's that? What's that?

It's alright, honey. It's alright.

Just calm down. Calm down.

'It's just Mr. Hogg trying to rob his own refrigerator.'

I was smart enough to put an alarm on the door.

Goodnight, Mr. Hogg.

As smart as Lulu is

it looks like they got the wrong person as sheriff.

'Convicts who escaped from are still at large.'

'State police are instituting a massive manhunt.'

'Both men are known to be armed.'

Good morning, Luke.

- Or should I say, "sergeant"? - Lee Benson.

'You haven't forgotten me, have you?'

Well, I haven't forgotten you either.

Or those two years you got me in the brig.

You got there by yourself. You didn't need help from me.

And if you got there, you probably deserved it.

Nobody's asking you, old man.

- Wait, you can't just come... - Nobody's asking you neither.

'Now, listen I want y'all to understand something.'

'I give the orders now.'

Everybody calls me "Sir."

- Nobody's in there. - Could've told you that.

What do you fellas want?

- Ain't you forgotten a "sir"? - Hey!

- Right? - Right.

- Sir. - Right, sir.

That's better.

Yeah, now, that's better.

I want you to get us a change of clothes.

And you get us some food.

Whatever guns and ammo you got around here.

The only gun we got is that old flintlock

which is not used in a coon's age.

We're gonna have to stop and get more artillery then.

After we change us our clothes.

And then you and me, we're gonna go into town..

And get us some guns and ammo..

And go on a little huntin' trip.

I ain't goin' nowhere with you.

"Sir." You ain't goin' nowhere, sir!

Remember that I'm giving the orders here now.

And it looks like you and your kin here..

You ain't got much choice.

Now, gettin' into Hazzard wasn't gonna be easy

what with the roadblocks set up by Rosco

at almost every main road in the county.

Herman won't eat.

Meanwhile, the nut with the cricket

had tied up Bo, Daisy and Jesse.

And Benson had Luke drive him into town to buy the ammo.

Now, Luke took his usual route.

Friends, this is a strange story.

'Sweetie pie, what's that rattling sound'

'I hear down there?'

Oh, it's nothing, lambikins, just me at the window.

I'm letting in some nice, cool morning air.

Put it on my tab, hmm?

'I'll be down in a second, honey'

'to fix you your little ol' poached eggy.'

No, no, no, take your time. Make yourself look beautiful.

I don't mind waitin', lambikins.

'I'm on my way.'

Friends, y'all are about to see true desperation.

You know, if Boss moved that fast all the time

he wouldn't have to go on a diet.

Aww.

- Poor baby. - Yeah.

'Cause you're on a diet, don't mean you've to starve

to death, you know?

I hopes not.

Would you like a little salt-free cracker with that egg?

Well... Well, I wonder who that is.

Who is it? Oh, Rosco.

- Good morning, sis. - Hi, honey.

I've come to get my fat buddy boy.

It's gonna be a big day today.

Well, he hasn't had his poached egg yet.

Good then, I'll just have a quick cup of coffee with him.

No, no, no! Don't you have nothin'.

I mean-I mean, I ain't gonna have nothin'.

You go have somethin'.

I mean, I'm gonna skip breakfast this mornin'.

- You're gonna skip breakfast? - Mm-hm.

- Oh, I'm proud of you. - Yeah.

I'll have a cup of coffee here with you.

No, no, no! Don't sit down.

Just go in the kitchen, have your coffee in there.

I'll stay here and breathe this nice, fresh mornin' air.

Well, I'll have a quick cup of coffee.

No, take all your time. Take a big breakfast.

Yeah. Go on. That's the idea.

'Boss.'

'I'll be right with you.'

No. Oh. Uh.

Oh, dagblast it.

I'm gonna have to take these vittles with me.

Goodness' sake.

Here, let me help you with that.

No, no. I can carry this.

You shouldn't carry anything on an empty stomach.

I said, I can carry it. I haven't locked it.

Aaah! Ahh! Eh.

Oh.

'J.D.'

Shame, shame.

Well, nobody's perfect.

Roadblock up ahead.

We better turn around and take a side road.

Uh-huh.

That'll look real suspicious.

You just drive on up there.

You tell 'em I'm a friend of yours visiting a spell.

Here's Luke.

- Mornin', Luke. - Hey, Enos. How you doin'?

Pretty good, buddy.

I'd like you to meet a friend.

Deputy Enos Strate, this is, uh..

Parker. Jack Parker.

'Old Marine buddy here of Luke's.'

Just in town for a few days' visit.

He's showing me the sights.

Any friend of Luke's is okay with me.

But y'all buds be real careful, there's a couple

of desperate criminals escaped from Chickasaw Prison, Luke.

'Well, you told me that nothing much'

ever happens around here.

- Can we go into town, deputy? - Oh, sure.

But keep an eye out for a big, white laundry truck.

That's what them convicts escaped in.

Oh, yes, sir. We'll do just that.

Well, come on, buddy. Let's go.

- Well, have a nice day, Luke. - Take her easy, Enos.

It's the first time I seen Luke goin' anywhere without Bo.

Boss was back at his office.

Listening to soothing music to assuage his savage stomach.

Nice word, "assuage," huh?

Diner..

'Home of succulent spareribs'

Oh, and spareribs.

'Mouthwatering cornbread.'

- Cornbread. - 'Mashed potatoes and gravy'

No potatoes and gravy. Turn it off.

'And juicy hamburgers with French fries.'

- No. No hamburgers. - 'Our luscious desserts.'

Don't wanna know.

Don't-don't give me that speech.

'With great French fries.'

- No banana cream pie! - 'Our luscious desserts.'

No, no, no! No pecan pie!

With mounds of whipped cream!

- Come on. - Hixx?

Do you think Herman would mind

if-if you gave me a glass of water? I'm thirsty.

No.

Uh.. Well, shoot.

I can't hardly drink it with my hands tied behind my back.

Well, here. You lean forward

and you can sip out of it.

Oh!

Daisy, can you untie this?

Now, what'd you do that for?

Try that again, you'll be under six feet of dirt.

You can't blame a fella for tryin'.

Long about now, Sheriff Little of Capitol City

was heading for Hazzard, lookin' for the convicts.

Listen, there ain't no flies on Sheriff Little.

Much as Luke hated to help ol' Benson buy the ammo

he wanted, knowin' it could be used to hurt some innocent

person with the rest of the Dukes being held

at gunpoint there wasn't much else he could do.

That's a big 10-4, Roadblock Three.

Listen, if you see anything, you let me know.

This is Rosco P. Coltrane, over and out.

- No. Shame. - Rosco, please, listen now.

I gotta have somethin' to eat, don't you know?

Maybe I could have one of them doughnuts.

No, I'm doing this for your own good, fat buddy.

Oh, please.

Are you gonna stand there and watch me starve to death?

All I want is one itty-bitty, little bite.

I tell you what.

When I'm through, I'll save you the center.

- Huh? - Well, that's the hole.

'That's right, that's what you get.'

Oh, give me some of that.

'Boss, no.'

- Give me a bite. - No, no.

Well, looks like I got to the zoo

at the jackasses' feeding time.

Listen here a little. I resent you

barging into my jail. After all, I'm the sheriff of this jail.

And I just commandeered it in the name of the governor.

And one more word out of you, pip-squeak

it's gonna be your last for posterity.

- Ooh. Ooh. - Any questions, fatso?

Wait a minute. You can't talk to me like that.

I just did.

Now, let's get down to some police business.

That is, if your pea-brain can understand it.

I got me some pictures here of them escaped cons

so we knows what they look like.

Any word from your roadblocks?

No, no word about that. You know what I think?

I think those dudes have taken to the back roads.

Yeah, or maybe they're holed up some place.

I got a street police chopper up there. Maybe he'll spot 'em.

Good, good.

Sheriff Little.

In the meantime, take a look at these.

Whoa. Uh-oh. Boy, I tell you.

Those are mean-lookin' dudes, aren't they?

May I take a peek, sheriff?

You don't have to worry.

'I tell you, Rosco P. Coltrane has eyes like a hawk.'

If they're around, I'll spot 'em.

Possum on a gum bush, I already have!

- You have? - Where?

I actually saw this one here.

In the General Lee with Luke Duke.

'He called himself Parker.'

He said he was a friend of Luke's from back in the Marines.

- Benson was in the Marines. - Yeah, well, so was Luke Duke.

'Well, then, I'm right.'

They are holed up. At the Duke farm.

I can't believe Luke or any of the Dukes

would do a thing like that.

Enos, you saw 'em with your own beady eyes.

How much proof do you need? Alright, let's go.

- Whoa. - Whoa?

I'll lead, Colbrain.

The name is Coltrane. There ain't no "brain" in it.

- You can say that again. - Well, you can say that again.

Let's go. We gotta go to the Duke farm.

Come on. Not gonna get away with a thing like this.

Come on, come on, come on.

- No, no, no. - Rosco, please.

I'm starving. I can't go to the farm hungry.

Please. Give me some food.

No, no, no.

I'm glad you're back. Had the radio on before.

They've got choppers all over the place

looking for us, and roadblocks.

Y'all ought to just give up.

They'll have everything covered.

Not if you folks give us a little more help.

You came here to settle a score with me.

Leave them out of it.

I'm afraid I can't. They're part of my plan.

Like what?

'The cops are out looking'

'for the laundry truck we parked by the barn, right?'

The girl and the old man

will drive the truck in the opposite direction while

'Luke and his cousin are gonna chauffeur us the other way.'

Down the back roads in the General Lee.

No way we'll do that.

I just hate repeating myself, but you haven't got any choice.

That boy don't give no whole

lot of room to work, does he?

Now, you untie them. We're gonna get goin' now.

You wait there, Herman

I gotta tend to some business here.

Been trying to get out of here.

Sheriff Little to Air Support Seven.

Suspects are in the area of the Duke farm outside of Hazzard.

Give me air support as I move in.

I want you to head southwest down 77.

And keep that CB Mike open

so I can hear everything you say and do.

You click it off, try warning the cops

and them boys is done for. You understand?

Yeah. Yeah, we understand.

'You just don't hurt my cousins.'

- Just don't do it. - Get going.

You two up front. Luke, you drive.

Wait a minute. Just let me drive.

- 'You don't need both.' - He's right.

- We don't need two of 'em. - I'm still running the show.

You two are gonna get in after me.

And if you got any funny ideas Hixx is gonna keep you covered.

As the General headed for the back roads

and Boss, Rosco and Sheriff Little

were racin' for the Duke farm.

Daisy and Jesse were in the laundry truck

which, just as Benson figured, would stick out

like a sore thumb.

Especially to one of them whirlybirds.

'This is Air Seven to Sheriff Little.'

Sheriff Little here. Go ahead, Air Seven.

'I've spotted the suspects' truck'

'moving southwest along State 77.'

Well, take a pass at it. If it's the truck

see if you can knock out a tire, disable it. We're on our way.

'That's a roger.'

'Alright, you fellas, let's just get one thing straight.'

You promised that you wouldn't hurt Bo and Luke, right?

Listen, you better answer me or I'm gonna turn

this thing around and go right back

where we started from.

'You just drive, old man.'

'Long as you do what we tell ya, everything stays cool.'

Uncle Jesse, now, listen, there's not a whole lot

we can do right now but drive.

Uh-oh.

It sounds like a police chopper overhead.

It's working, Lee.

Cops thinks it's us in that truck.

Dang fools, they're shootin' at us.

Just keep driving.

Uncle Jesse, what are we gonna do?

We've been hit.

Uncle Jesse, jump!

- You alright? - Yeah.

I got my mouth full of dirt.

Lost Sheep to Shepherd.

Y'all got your ears on, come back.

Y'all got your ears on, come back.

Switch over to the police channel.

'Air Support Seven to Sheriff Little.'

'We got the tire, but the truck went over the side. Burnin' up.'

Oh, Lord.

Well, what about them cons?

'They weren't in the truck.'

'Two people jumped out just before it crashed.'

'A girl and an old man. Both seemed okay, though.'

Well, keep circling 'em, Air Seven.

We're on our way to pick 'em up for questioning.

'That's a roger.'

Oh, he's gonna pick 'em up for questioning.

Good, good. Listen, while he does that

we got time to stop for a little lunch.

Wrong, wrong, Boss. We can't stop now

we're right in the middle of official police business.

Oh, yeah. But, Rosco, I'm starving.

Listen, Sheriff Little, this is Rosco P. Coltrane.

'Listen, you know who that copper pilot's'

talkin' about, don't you?

It's Jesse and Daisy Duke in that truck.

Bo and Luke Duke are probably escapin' right at this minute

with their friend in that General Lee.

Over and out.

We got time. I mean, a little fast food...

No, no. No num-nums.

All units, we're lookin' for an orange sedan

'with a big 01 painted on the side of it.'

They got a make on the car.

It's gonna be up to you now.

Try anything funny and that's all she wrote for both of ya.

Now, Enos, you know daggone good and well

Uncle Jesse and Daisy ain't got nothin' to do

with no escaped convicts.

Of course I know that, Cooter.

Yeah. And you also know that Bo and Luke

ain't got nothin' to do with it neither.

Well, I'd like to believe that, Cooter.

But Luke did say that one of them fellas was a friend of his.

Enos, didn't it never occur to you

that that boy might have been

holding a gun on him when he said it?

Shucks, that never entered my mind.

Look, Enos, you have got to convince..

Rosco and Boss Hogg and Sheriff Little

that the Dukes are innocent.

Who put you up to drivin' that truck?

Them escaped convicts, that's who.

And nobody put us up to it. They made us do it.

Just like they made Bo and Luke drive that car.

Oh, tish, tush, turly-walker.

Are you trying to tell me that Luke Duke did not know

'this Benson fella in the Marine Corps?'

Well, sure they were in the Marines together, Rosco.

But they weren't buddies. As a matter of fact

Luke sent that Benson fella to the brig.

Oh, baloney!

Oh, baloney. Did you say baloney?

- Yes, I said, baloney. - Where is it?

Oh, these Dukes are dishing out the baloney.

Are you gonna talk or do I have to spend

the rest of the day grillin' you, huh?

Please don't use that word, "grill."

It reminds me of hamburgers, frankfurters and barbecues.

Oh.

- I got an idea. - What?

Why don't we just break for lunch?

You two ain't going nowhere.

Neither are these two till you talk.

Now, I've cracked some hard-boiled eggs before.

Hard-boiled eggs.

Now, will y'all stop fishing around

and try and help Bo and Luke?

Fish! I can't stand it anymore.

I gotta have somethin' to eat.

Give me somethin' to eat. Anything! I'll eat anything!

Anything! Give me somethin' to eat.

Here, Flash. Time for din-din.

I'll eat anything! I'll eat anything!

I gotta eat somethin'! Oh, good!

Man before beast.

Mr. Hogg, that's a dog biscuit!

It's food, ain't it? Give it to me.

Flash, don't growl at Mr. Hogg like that.

That wasn't the dog, it was my stomach.

I gotta put somethin' in it. Give me that thing!

That's gonna make you sick. Mr. Hogg, don't eat that.

Now, there ain't much that Rosco and Sheriff Little

agreed on but one thing.

And that was, whenever you can put a Duke in jail, do it.

- Gives me a quiver in my liver. - No, I can't believe this.

Flash is gonna be proud of her daddy.

Coo-coo-coo!

So, with Daisy and Jesse in the slammer

the state-police chopper now having a description

of the General Lee, and them escaped convicts

holdin' loaded guns on Bo and Luke

it was turnin' out to be a very full Saturday.

How do you like takin' orders for a change, Luke?

When I gave an order, I didn't need a gun in my hand.

Hey, take a look. Smoke up ahead.

Must be a fire over at Bearlake Woods.

They've got to be cuttin' through the county

by taking back roads.

Well, we got lots of those.

'Air Support Seven, Sheriff Little?'

Sheriff Little here. Go ahead, Air Seven.

'I think I've got 'em spotted over Miller's Meadow'

'and Bearcreek Woods.'

'Big fire up there, so they changed their direction'

'and they're heading a little further south.'

'I'm gonna go down and check for sure.'

Check, Air Seven. Check.

I'd better tell Boss.

- That's murder. - What?

That's plumb, unadulterated murder.

- But I want him. - No, no.

- I'm gonna get him. - No.

No, I want him. I want him.

No. No, Boss.

Cops!

Uh, Luke, you, uh, you better watch out

for them potholes in the road up ahead, huh?

I see what you mean.

I can't get a shot off, if you don't hold this thing steady.

Don't blame me. Blame the road.

We're sittin' ducks here.

Head towards that forest fire.

- You crazy? - Yeah. Like a fox.

Ain't nobody gonna follow us in there.

Maybe an undertaker.

Not if you find a way to get us through it.

All that smoke, they'll never spot us from up there.

Now, go for it. Or you're dead.

You've been watching too much TV, Benson.

You're still playing the brave man, huh?

Well, you're no longer in the Marines, Luke.

I'll settle that score with you later.

'I don't believe it.'

'That orange car drove right into the forest fire.'

Orange car in the forest fire.

That's the General Lee.

Yeah, they'll be burned up alive.

Can you see 'em yet, Air Seven?

'The smoke's too thick.'

They can't stay in there long. They got to come out somewhere.

'Question is, where? This fire's burned'

'over 1000 acres.'

- Thousands of acres. - Thousands.

I never thought it would come to this.

No.

Dang it, I can't see a thing.

We're gonna be lucky to get out of this.

'Luke's right. If we don't run into a tree'

some tree's gonna run into us.

'You just keep drivin'.'

Hixx and me ain't got nothing to lose.

Yeah, but what about Herman?

I bet when Bo and Luke got up this morning

they didn't think they'd be drivin' through a fire

with a nut with a gun on him who was worried

about his cricket. Friends, that's stressful.

Benson, you don't care about nobody but hisself.

I wonder whether he cares about that.

You hush your mouth. I only need but one driver.

'Your Aunt Clara, she looked at me and said'

' "Didn't you bring the fish?"'

'I said, "Well, no."'

See, we'd gone off and left all them fish there on the bank.

'I imagine they're still there.'

Cooter.

- Hey. - How'd you get in?

- Lulu? - We sneaked past Enos.

I told Lulu what Boss was up to.

And much as I love that apple dumplin'

I don't like the crust he's showing.

Locking you two up and accusing Bo and Luke

of helping escaped criminals.

But..

Oh, my goodness. Thank you, Lulu.

Shush, shush.

Come on.

Uncle Jesse, now that we're out, what are we gonna do?

We'll find Bo and Luke, and give 'em a hand.

Right, right.

Hold it there! You ain't going nowheres.

In fact you're going back in that cellblock.

- How'd you get out, anyway? - I let 'em out.

Oh, lambikins, you shouldn't have done a thing like that.

Jefferson Davis, you know deep down in your heart

the Dukes are decent, law-abiding citizens.

Oh, sure they is.

Just like tubby here and this tin-horn

tin-star excuse for a sheriff.

Okay, Colbrain, if you can find your way

back to the cellblock, you take them Dukes

and lock 'em up again.

- Oh! - And lock her up too.

Uh-oh. You just wait a minute, Little.

Lambikins happens to be my wife.

That's right.

Nobody's gonna throw her in no cell.

Okay. Okay. Lock him up too.

Wait just a pea-pickin' minute here.

'Just happens that he is my brother-in-law'

and this is my sister and I am the law in Hazzard.

Hm. Well, I just repealed that law.

It is illegal for you to lock a sheriff up in his own jail.

Listen here, Little, I'm gonna have your badge for this.

You can have it. I know the place where you can find it.

Wait a minute. Wait a minute.

- Oh, he just stole... - Hurry up!

This just ain't too bright.

One flame catches that gas tank and it's all over for all of us.

I'm beginning to wonder

if this was such a good idea.

- Herman can't take this heat. - So what?

Ain't you never heard of fried grasshopper?

Hey! Hey, you screws!

Chow time! Chow time!

Looks like the wind shifted.

I think we're through the worst of it.

How far is the nearest road from here?

I'd say probably five, six miles.

Do you think Bo and Luke will be alright, Uncle Jesse?

Well, no news is good news.

We can just hope for the best.

What we gotta do is figure a way outta here

before that Sheriff Little shoots up the whole county.

Jesse, I'm tellin' you, I can't hope for nothin'

or figure out nothin' while I'm in here starvin'

waiting for my dinner.

Why don't you quit thinkin' about food

and find a way to get us out of here?

Oh, Lulu, Lulu, it's all your fault.

You keep me on that diet so long and now I'm so starvin'

I can't think of nothin'.

It's a shame, Jefferson, that we have to be in here.

I know it.

But if we was out, I would fix you some

buttermilk pancakes to start.

You would?

And about a half dozen pork chops smothered in gravy.

Ooh. Yeah?

- With some chitlins.. - Oh.

And some turnip greens..

Oh.

And maybe a big piece of warm pecan pie for dessert

with a big ol' scoop of homemade vanilla ice cream on top of it.

You'd do all that, honey bunny?

If we was out helpin' Bo and Luke.

Oh, if we was out helpin' Bo and Luke.

Well, Bo and Luke were out of the fire

but not out of the fryin' pan.

- Dinner, Mr. Hogg. - Oh, dinner. Dinner, huh?

Oh, you brought dinner.

We don't want none of that slop.

I want some of that slop.

- No, you don't. - No?

It's the same menu you ordered to all our prisoners.

Yeah, but I don't want none served by no traitor.

You know what I mean?

Like him. Like you, Enos.

Who's got no respect for law and order.

That's right. You know what you are?

You're a regular Benjamin Arnold.

That's Benedict.

Yeah, a regular Benjamin Benedict.

But, sheriff, Mr. Hogg, I-I never done anything against

the law in my whole life.

Ain't that so, Daisy? Miss Lulu?

Up until now, Enos.

We know you'd never break the law, Enos.

But it is your beholden duty, Enos, to protect the innocent.

Yes, sir.

And you know in your heart that Bo and Luke are innocent.

Possum on a gum bush.

Daisy, I didn't ever mean to not help the innocent.

Well, then, do it.

- Do what? - Get the keys.

- Help the innocent. - Help the innocent.

- Get the keys. Over there. - Yes, sir. Yes, sir.

- Okay, Luke. Stop the car. - Here?

'You heard me.'

Don't try to win any medals. You'll never get to wear 'em.

Now get out of the car. One at a time.

'Move over to the edge of the road there slow and easy.'

I'm going.

Move back.

There's no cop cars, no chopper.

No, not yet, but they'll be comin'.

And so is the other set of wheels we're gonna be needing.

- 'You lie down there.' - What?

I want you to pretend that you're hurt.

Better do what he says, Bo, or you won't have to pretend.

Now, Hixx, you get down there, and you make it look good.

You hear me?

Back up there. Put your hands down.

Get out of the car.

Come on!

Alright, hold it.

Get up. All of you!

Alright. Alright.

Herman.

Where's Herman?

Well..

I'm afraid that this is where we're gonna say goodbye.

Somebody better do some quick thinkin' and fast talkin'.

I'm finally gonna get even with you, Luke Duke.

Hadn't been for you, I'd be in the Marine. I'd have my stripes.

You got your stripes, Benson. Only they run up and down.

That big yellow one that goes up and down your back.

One you get for shootin' people that can't defend themselves.

You just keep runnin' off with the mouth.

A condemned man got a right to speak his peace, ain't he?

You are gonna shoot him after me, ain't ya?

And then probably this feller and probably Herman the cricket.

Oh, no. Lee, he wouldn't do that. Not to Herman.

Sure he would, Hixx.

After he's done using you, he's probably gonna kill you too.

'A snake turns on anybody.'

- Even other snakes. - Lee..

'You got grits for brains?'

Can't you see? They're trying to turn us against each other.

Ain't that right, Ex-Sergeant Duke?

Benson ever tell you why he got thrown in the brig?

He busted into his best buddy's footlocker

and was stealin' the guy blind.

'When the guy walks in and catches him at it'

'Benson slips a knife up 'tween his ribs.'

Real trustworthy pal you got there.

'Radio said you only had six months left on your sentence.'

Well, you can just as soon kiss that goodbye now..

That your buddy talked you into escapin' with him.

Don't sound too bright to me.

'You're gonna be stuck with a murder rap.'

Alright, I've had enough out of you two.

Well, I ain't!

I know you think I'm real dumb, don't you?

Maybe I am. They're right.

I wasn't smart bustin' out with you like that

but ain't nothin' I can do about that now.

But I ain't going back there. Not for killing them!

Now, they stay. We got wheels.

'If anybody's gonna come down on 'em just let it be the cops.'

They're lookin' for the orange car. Not the car we're driving.

And they'll be on the CB as we take off.

Oh, the hell they are!

- Would you come on? - I want 'em, Hixx.

Especially Luke. I want him dead.

No. Not if killing him means taking Herman and me with him.

Now, are you comin' or not?

Another time, Duke.

That there took some fancy talkin'.

We were just plain lucky.

These guys are both crazy as loons.

Yeah.

Oh, great. Just what we needed.

Hey?

Get him in the shade.

I got spare tire in the trunk. We gotta make a quick change.

We ain't still goin' after 'em, are we?

- We got any choice? - No.

Hey? Mister, hello?

Hey, come on. Come on, we gotta get you in the shade.

Hey.

Oh, is that the manifest I asked for?

Okay. Uh, get back to your patrol car

and take it up on the north side.

Air Seven, Air Seven.

This is Sheriff Little. Any sign of 'em yet?

'That's a negative. I'm gonna take another sweep.'

Let's go.

- Is he gonna be alright? - Yeah. He'll be fine.

- 'Good, we're out. Let's go.' - Shush.

- I'm going up there. - Hold it.

- What do you mean? What? - Just hold it.

Let Enos go first and make sure the coast is clear.

Oh, the coast is clear. Yeah, you go. You go.

Go on now. Clear the coast?

'I don't know how they did it, but they got through' the fire.'

'That orange car's back on the road'

'heading east on State 18 toward the state line.'

Alright, Air Seven. You stay with them.

All units. All units, copy.

Remember, them suspects and them escaped cons

are armed and dangerous.

I'm on my way.

Strate. You stay by that radio.

Now, come on up.

Oh, alright. What happened?

They're out of the fire and headed east

on Highway 18, going to the state line.

- They're okay. - Oh, they are alright.

They're alright then. That's good news.

Uncle Jesse, we've gotta get Sheriff Little

to tell his men not to shoot.

With them escaped convicts being armed..

Daisy, I'm afraid they'll shoot on sight.

Amen, Enos. Them ol' boys will open up

quicker than a hot knife going through fresh goat butter.

Them poor boys ain't got a chance.

Yeah.

We gotta figure out some way to stop Sheriff Little.

Wait a pea-pickin' minute, Jesse.

I'm the law around here and if anybody's

gonna give orders...

It's gonna be me! Rosco, hush up.

Jefferson Davis Hogg.

It's almost dinner time.

Ooh, yeah, I get it.

Alright, Jesse, I was wrong. You're in charge.

But what about Bo and Luke?

The boys will be able to take care of the convicts.

I'm sure of that.

We gotta worry about Sheriff Little and his men.

If we take Mill Road, we can head him off at Pine Creek.

Alright, what are we waitin' for?

The sooner we get it over with, the sooner I eat.

- Where's my hat? - Let's go.

Enos!

Come on, come on, come on.

'Come on, come on. Enos, where you going?'

Come on, come on. We haven't got all night.

Let's go, let's go.

Oh, thank you very, very much. What?

No stuffin' until everybody's safe and sound.

- Yeah, but.. - Here. Come on, Boss.

Alright, alright.

As Hazzard Number One and Number Two

raced off to stop Sheriff Little..

Them escaped convicts was racin' for the state line.

We're gonna make it, Lee. We're gonna make it.

You hear that, Herman? We're gonna make it.

With Bo and Luke in the General racing after 'em

trying to close the gap.

Trouble was, nobody, especially that state-police chopper

had any idea Benson and Hixx was in another car

and not in the General.

Great. That chopper ain't got no idea he's chasing the wrong car.

We ain't got no radio to tell him either.

Hey. What are we gonna do about it?

I don't know, ain't you got no ideas?

While Bo and Luke tried to play catch-up with Benson and Hixx

Hazzard Number One and Number Two

were looking to catch up with Sheriff Little.

There. Right near Pine Creek.

This is Hazzard Two calling Hazzard One.

Daisy got on the horn to Boss, Rosco and Lulu

in Hazzard Number One, and told them the idea

was to block the road or force him off..

Any way they could.

The game gets sweeter.

Give me the Mike. You got a hairpin?

I sure do.

Thank you.

With Little's car and radio out of commission

Jesse, using some static to disguise his voice

made it appear like Sheriff Little was doing the talking.

The orange car.

Hope that works.

We ain't never gonna catch 'em.

They're probably out of the dang state by now.

I'm gonna cut over onto High Top Road.

Maybe we can spot 'em. Ain't got nothin' to lose.

Unless them fellas up in that helicopter

decide to use us for target practice.

What are you slowing down for?

We're getting near the state line.

I don't wanna get stopped for speeding.

We're just supposed to be two law-abiding citizens

passing through.

Three.

You forgot Herman.

There they are.

Great, how are we gonna stop 'em? They got guns, remember?

We just drop in on 'em. Hang on.

Well, Herman..

I guess we're going home.

- Nice shot. - Yeah.

Well, Benson and Hixx were back behind bars

where they belonged.

Oh, Lord. I can't eat another bite.

And that meant, with the exception of Boss

who nearly foundered from overeatin'

Lulu and everybody else in Hazzard, especially the Dukes

were able to sleep peacefully.

But in Hazzard, you never know what's gonna show up

with the morning sun.