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1
00:00:04,787 --> 00:00:08,050
Dr. Hayes used his hand
to move down my body,
2
00:00:08,051 --> 00:00:09,791
pinning me against the table.
3
00:00:09,792 --> 00:00:13,882
Because this is the first
accusation against him,
4
00:00:13,883 --> 00:00:16,319
his privileges
won't be revoked.
5
00:00:16,320 --> 00:00:20,628
I understand how you feel--
exactly how you feel.
6
00:00:20,629 --> 00:00:22,673
Dr. Archer is aware
of our family history.
7
00:00:22,674 --> 00:00:24,849
Oh, that we have
a 50/50 chance of inheriting
8
00:00:24,850 --> 00:00:26,721
a cruel and sudden death?
9
00:00:26,722 --> 00:00:28,723
Can't keep hiding
from the truth.
10
00:00:28,724 --> 00:00:31,247
We'll face it together.
11
00:00:31,248 --> 00:00:33,336
I'm very sorry to say
we cannot approve you
12
00:00:33,337 --> 00:00:35,208
as a surrogate at this time.
13
00:00:35,209 --> 00:00:38,037
It's something we found
when we ran your labs.
14
00:00:39,909 --> 00:00:42,041
The surgery's been canceled.
15
00:00:42,042 --> 00:00:43,607
He rigged the system somehow.
16
00:00:43,608 --> 00:00:45,131
He took the lungs
from my patient
17
00:00:45,132 --> 00:00:46,610
and gave them
to his own daughter.
18
00:00:46,611 --> 00:00:49,961
I did what I had to do
to give my daughter a chance.
19
00:00:49,962 --> 00:00:53,444
Would you rather have me
just sit and watch her die?
20
00:00:55,142 --> 00:00:56,578
Thank you for coming.
21
00:00:59,320 --> 00:01:02,670
I didn't think you would.
22
00:01:02,671 --> 00:01:04,541
Neither did I.
23
00:01:04,542 --> 00:01:07,763
So what is it
you want to say to me?
24
00:01:11,158 --> 00:01:13,942
Um...
25
00:01:13,943 --> 00:01:17,554
I've had a lot of time to think
about what I did to you.
26
00:01:17,555 --> 00:01:21,341
I was obviously not of
right mind after Wendy died.
27
00:01:21,342 --> 00:01:24,474
But I've been put
on an antipsychotic,
28
00:01:24,475 --> 00:01:28,087
and--and I've accepted
Jesus Christ into my heart.
29
00:01:28,088 --> 00:01:30,480
I asked you to come here today
30
00:01:30,481 --> 00:01:34,310
because I wanted to tell you
how deeply sorry I am
31
00:01:34,311 --> 00:01:36,399
for the pain that I caused you.
32
00:01:36,400 --> 00:01:39,576
And I wanted to ask
33
00:01:39,577 --> 00:01:43,580
if you could find it
in your heart to forgive me.
34
00:01:43,581 --> 00:01:46,017
Stop.
35
00:01:46,018 --> 00:01:48,803
Uh-uh.
36
00:01:48,804 --> 00:01:54,417
You don't get to preach
to me, ever.
37
00:01:54,418 --> 00:01:58,769
And no, I don't forgive you.
38
00:01:58,770 --> 00:02:03,600
Forgiving you won't erase
the scar on my stomach.
39
00:02:03,601 --> 00:02:06,429
It won't erase the fact
that I see your face
40
00:02:06,430 --> 00:02:09,476
when I close my eyes at night.
41
00:02:09,477 --> 00:02:15,221
I have to live with
what happened to me every day.
42
00:02:17,180 --> 00:02:19,877
And so should you.
43
00:02:19,878 --> 00:02:21,489
I'll pray for you.
44
00:02:23,839 --> 00:02:27,102
Pray for yourself.
45
00:02:27,103 --> 00:02:29,322
I'm good.
46
00:02:49,038 --> 00:02:50,734
You're pregnant?
47
00:02:50,735 --> 00:02:53,172
Yeah.
48
00:02:53,173 --> 00:02:55,696
Um...
49
00:02:55,697 --> 00:02:57,219
does Mitch know?
50
00:02:57,220 --> 00:02:59,874
You're the first person
that I've told.
51
00:02:59,875 --> 00:03:01,484
Look, I am so sorry.
52
00:03:01,485 --> 00:03:04,400
This, um--this wasn't planned.
53
00:03:04,401 --> 00:03:06,315
Do you--do you not believe me?
54
00:03:06,316 --> 00:03:08,535
Of course I believe you.
55
00:03:08,536 --> 00:03:10,667
But it's just typical Hannah.
56
00:03:10,668 --> 00:03:12,669
Okay, look, Lizzy,
I can have this baby,
57
00:03:12,670 --> 00:03:14,367
and then I can still
be your surrogate.
58
00:03:14,368 --> 00:03:16,412
Oh, come on.
How is that gonna work?
59
00:03:16,413 --> 00:03:18,153
You will have a baby.
60
00:03:18,154 --> 00:03:20,765
That will be your focus,
your life.
61
00:03:23,551 --> 00:03:25,595
I should have known better
than to trust you again.
62
00:03:25,596 --> 00:03:27,380
Oh, come on.
That's not fair.
63
00:03:27,381 --> 00:03:29,033
Fair? Are you kidding?
64
00:03:29,034 --> 00:03:31,993
I've spent years watching out
for you, after Mom died,
65
00:03:31,994 --> 00:03:34,648
when you went to med school,
when you got hooked on heroin.
66
00:03:34,649 --> 00:03:35,953
I have done
everything that I can
67
00:03:35,954 --> 00:03:37,520
to help you on this journey
to have a baby.
68
00:03:37,521 --> 00:03:40,741
Oh, do you want
some extra credit?
69
00:03:40,742 --> 00:03:42,003
Lizzy!
70
00:03:42,004 --> 00:03:44,266
I have been in this
with you from the start,
71
00:03:44,267 --> 00:03:46,660
and I have worked my ass off
72
00:03:46,661 --> 00:03:50,098
to make up for all of those
horrible things that I did!
73
00:03:50,099 --> 00:03:52,231
This baby?
74
00:03:52,232 --> 00:03:54,885
This baby isn't that.
75
00:03:54,886 --> 00:04:00,717
Isn't there--isn't there some--
some small part of you
76
00:04:00,718 --> 00:04:03,417
that's actually happy for me?
77
00:04:05,070 --> 00:04:06,463
Once again, it's my fault.
78
00:04:14,079 --> 00:04:15,036
Stop.
79
00:04:18,083 --> 00:04:19,258
You're a child.
80
00:04:19,259 --> 00:04:21,564
Yeah, proudly.
81
00:04:21,565 --> 00:04:24,350
Uh, I don't wanna
keep you in suspense.
82
00:04:24,351 --> 00:04:25,786
You're negative for GSS.
83
00:04:25,787 --> 00:04:26,917
Congratulations.
84
00:04:26,918 --> 00:04:29,137
Oh, my God.
85
00:04:29,138 --> 00:04:30,399
Wait, wait, wait.
86
00:04:30,400 --> 00:04:32,532
I see the blue envelope
in your pocket.
87
00:04:32,533 --> 00:04:35,056
What does it say, Caty?
88
00:04:35,057 --> 00:04:36,971
Also negative.
89
00:04:36,972 --> 00:04:38,668
Thank God.
90
00:04:38,669 --> 00:04:40,104
Oh, God!
91
00:04:40,105 --> 00:04:41,410
I just assumed that we were--
92
00:04:41,411 --> 00:04:42,933
Me too.
93
00:04:45,459 --> 00:04:48,548
Wait, so what caused
the weakness?
94
00:04:48,549 --> 00:04:50,854
The same thing that
caused your tremor.
95
00:04:50,855 --> 00:04:52,682
Your brother has
a severely herniated disk.
96
00:04:52,683 --> 00:04:54,554
He's responding to steroids.
97
00:04:54,555 --> 00:04:56,120
You should follow up
with Dr. Abrams,
98
00:04:56,121 --> 00:04:58,471
but he'll make a full recovery.
99
00:04:58,472 --> 00:04:59,863
And I'm--I'm--
100
00:04:59,864 --> 00:05:02,649
I'm very happy for you,
Caitlin.
101
00:05:02,650 --> 00:05:04,215
Yeah, but what about me?
102
00:05:04,216 --> 00:05:06,000
Yeah, I'm just less invested.
103
00:05:06,001 --> 00:05:08,612
Oh.
104
00:05:10,484 --> 00:05:12,920
Violet, you're going
to Trauma 1.
105
00:05:12,921 --> 00:05:15,531
- What have we got, Novak?
- Auto versus tree.
106
00:05:15,532 --> 00:05:18,012
19-year-old female,
the driver and sole occupant.
107
00:05:18,013 --> 00:05:21,145
BP 129/60, heart rate 75.
108
00:05:21,146 --> 00:05:22,495
She hit it going 50.
109
00:05:22,496 --> 00:05:23,931
Had to use the jaws of life
to pry her out.
110
00:05:23,932 --> 00:05:25,802
Multiple abrasions
to the face and chest.
111
00:05:25,803 --> 00:05:27,456
Feels like she could have
a couple of broken ribs.
112
00:05:27,457 --> 00:05:30,373
GCS was 13 to 14
on the ride in.
113
00:05:34,203 --> 00:05:36,378
Call Dr. Charles.
114
00:05:36,379 --> 00:05:37,814
Why?
115
00:05:37,815 --> 00:05:41,209
This is his daughter, Anna.
116
00:05:57,357 --> 00:05:58,922
Has anyone called her
mother to let her know?
117
00:05:58,923 --> 00:05:59,880
I did.
118
00:05:59,881 --> 00:06:01,272
Susan's catching
the first flight.
119
00:06:01,273 --> 00:06:02,796
- Sharon, how's she doing?
- She's holding her own.
120
00:06:02,797 --> 00:06:06,800
CT scan found a nasal bone
fracture, but no brain bleed.
121
00:06:06,801 --> 00:06:08,105
Okay. Is she awake?
122
00:06:08,106 --> 00:06:10,717
Uh, Dr. Ripley
still has her sedated.
123
00:06:10,718 --> 00:06:12,675
- Oh, my God, Anna.
- Dr. Charles.
124
00:06:12,676 --> 00:06:15,069
What's the status, buddy?
What--what are we looking at?
125
00:06:15,070 --> 00:06:16,810
I'm watching
her concussion closely.
126
00:06:16,811 --> 00:06:19,029
She, uh--she slammed
her head pretty hard.
127
00:06:19,030 --> 00:06:21,075
She also sustained
three broken ribs
128
00:06:21,076 --> 00:06:23,991
and a left distal radius
fracture I reduced.
129
00:06:39,529 --> 00:06:41,748
What's going on?
130
00:06:41,749 --> 00:06:43,967
Why was my surgery canceled?
131
00:06:43,968 --> 00:06:47,536
Noah, unfortunately,
the ODA has changed course,
132
00:06:47,537 --> 00:06:50,409
and they are giving the lungs
to another recipient.
133
00:06:50,410 --> 00:06:52,106
Wait, what?
134
00:06:52,107 --> 00:06:54,151
But how can they just do that
after they already said
135
00:06:54,152 --> 00:06:55,370
they're giving the lungs
to Noah?
136
00:06:55,371 --> 00:06:56,980
I mean, how can they
just do that?
137
00:06:56,981 --> 00:06:58,939
No, they can't.
This isn't right.
138
00:06:58,940 --> 00:07:00,810
Just--I need you
to explain to us
139
00:07:00,811 --> 00:07:02,421
what happened
so I can fix this.
140
00:07:02,422 --> 00:07:05,119
Mr. Macron, I wish there was
something I could do, okay?
141
00:07:05,120 --> 00:07:07,164
And I tried my very best
to argue our case
142
00:07:07,165 --> 00:07:08,470
as strongly as I could.
143
00:07:08,471 --> 00:07:09,993
Try harder.
144
00:07:09,994 --> 00:07:11,560
I'm sorry.
145
00:07:11,561 --> 00:07:14,302
So what do we do now?
146
00:07:14,303 --> 00:07:17,305
Well, given the circumstances
of Noah's lung function,
147
00:07:17,306 --> 00:07:19,481
we need to buy some more time.
148
00:07:19,482 --> 00:07:22,702
And the best way to do that
is to put you on ECMO.
149
00:07:22,703 --> 00:07:25,313
A machine that
breathes for me?
150
00:07:25,314 --> 00:07:28,055
Hey, look, I know
that's scary, okay?
151
00:07:28,056 --> 00:07:30,274
But you are still at the top
of the transplant list.
152
00:07:30,275 --> 00:07:31,798
Like that actually
means something.
153
00:07:31,799 --> 00:07:33,583
Walter, stop.
154
00:07:35,585 --> 00:07:37,978
Okay, we need to do
what it takes right now
155
00:07:37,979 --> 00:07:39,893
to give you the best shot
to be ready
156
00:07:39,894 --> 00:07:41,503
when the next set of lungs
come along.
157
00:07:41,504 --> 00:07:43,505
Okay, but you said that ECMO
could carry other risks
158
00:07:43,506 --> 00:07:45,638
that might make transplant
more difficult.
159
00:07:45,639 --> 00:07:46,900
I did, yes.
160
00:07:46,901 --> 00:07:48,641
We don't have
any other choice.
161
00:07:48,642 --> 00:07:52,514
And ECMO could give
your lungs more time to heal.
162
00:07:52,515 --> 00:07:56,344
How long can he survive
on ECMO without new lungs?
163
00:07:56,345 --> 00:08:00,870
A few weeks, maybe a month.
164
00:08:00,871 --> 00:08:02,568
How soon does he
have to go on it?
165
00:08:02,569 --> 00:08:04,266
Within the hour.
166
00:08:07,051 --> 00:08:08,530
I'll be okay, Dad.
167
00:08:08,531 --> 00:08:09,879
Yeah.
168
00:08:09,880 --> 00:08:11,272
Yeah, you're gonna be good.
169
00:08:11,273 --> 00:08:13,883
You're gonna be okay.
170
00:08:13,884 --> 00:08:16,408
Sweetie, you're doing great.
171
00:08:24,329 --> 00:08:25,461
I--
172
00:08:28,072 --> 00:08:29,986
I heard Griffin Lancer
removed you
173
00:08:29,987 --> 00:08:32,380
as Alea's primary physician.
174
00:08:32,381 --> 00:08:33,947
Uh, yeah.
175
00:08:33,948 --> 00:08:35,426
Yeah, he did.
176
00:08:35,427 --> 00:08:37,559
The guy's
an entitled egomaniac,
177
00:08:37,560 --> 00:08:39,692
but I don't really
blame him one bit.
178
00:08:39,693 --> 00:08:41,041
Why?
179
00:08:41,042 --> 00:08:42,695
'Cause you'd do
the same thing for your kids?
180
00:08:42,696 --> 00:08:44,044
Yeah.
181
00:08:44,045 --> 00:08:45,828
In a twisted way,
he's just being the best dad
182
00:08:45,829 --> 00:08:47,917
he knows how to be.
183
00:08:47,918 --> 00:08:49,179
When you love someone
that much,
184
00:08:49,180 --> 00:08:53,009
it opens you up
to so much pain.
185
00:08:53,010 --> 00:08:54,750
They say it's like
having your heart
186
00:08:54,751 --> 00:08:56,752
run around outside your body.
187
00:08:56,753 --> 00:08:59,321
Yeah, it makes you wonder
if it's really worth it.
188
00:09:02,150 --> 00:09:04,804
Anna's oxygen saturation
continues to improve,
189
00:09:04,805 --> 00:09:06,849
using her incentive spirometer.
190
00:09:06,850 --> 00:09:09,635
Okay, well, that--that
sounds like really good news.
191
00:09:09,636 --> 00:09:11,245
It's a step
in the right direction.
192
00:09:11,246 --> 00:09:12,942
The pulmonary contusion
must not be
193
00:09:12,943 --> 00:09:14,596
so bad under her rib fracture.
194
00:09:14,597 --> 00:09:18,600
So the seat belt
broke her ribs?
195
00:09:18,601 --> 00:09:20,167
Uh, no.
196
00:09:20,168 --> 00:09:22,256
Anna wasn't wearing
a seat belt.
197
00:09:22,257 --> 00:09:23,736
That doesn't sound like Anna.
198
00:09:23,737 --> 00:09:25,738
She actually broke her ribs
on the steering wheel
199
00:09:25,739 --> 00:09:26,913
upon impact.
200
00:09:26,914 --> 00:09:28,131
Okay.
201
00:09:28,132 --> 00:09:29,306
Makes sense.
202
00:09:29,307 --> 00:09:31,700
When--when can we see her?
203
00:09:31,701 --> 00:09:34,834
I'll call when she's
ready for visitors.
204
00:09:34,835 --> 00:09:36,009
- Thank you.
- Thanks, Mitch.
205
00:09:36,010 --> 00:09:38,359
Yeah.
206
00:09:39,361 --> 00:09:40,883
It's gonna be okay, Dad.
207
00:09:40,884 --> 00:09:43,407
Oh, I know. I know.
208
00:09:43,408 --> 00:09:45,235
I'll feel a whole lot better
209
00:09:45,236 --> 00:09:46,715
when we can talk to her,
you know?
210
00:09:46,716 --> 00:09:49,326
I know.
211
00:09:49,327 --> 00:09:51,459
You wanted to see me?
212
00:09:51,460 --> 00:09:53,896
The board's been
discussing some cuts
213
00:09:53,897 --> 00:09:55,550
for the upcoming
fiscal quarter.
214
00:09:55,551 --> 00:09:57,857
I'm sorry.
Where's this coming from?
215
00:09:57,858 --> 00:10:01,643
The expected future loss of
revenue from losing Dr. Hayes.
216
00:10:01,644 --> 00:10:05,255
Well, your tone suggests
that Dr. Hayes's departure
217
00:10:05,256 --> 00:10:07,127
was somehow my fault.
218
00:10:07,128 --> 00:10:09,782
Obviously, it was
Dr. Hayes's fault,
219
00:10:09,783 --> 00:10:12,654
though the very public nature
of his departure
220
00:10:12,655 --> 00:10:14,874
did leave Gaffney
a little flat-footed.
221
00:10:14,875 --> 00:10:18,965
I didn't leak
the Hayes bombshell, Miranda.
222
00:10:18,966 --> 00:10:21,489
I'm not saying
you did, Sharon.
223
00:10:21,490 --> 00:10:24,013
But it doesn't change
the financial reality.
224
00:10:24,014 --> 00:10:25,624
It's a list of approved cuts
225
00:10:25,625 --> 00:10:28,453
you're expected
to execute ASAP.
226
00:10:32,675 --> 00:10:35,634
And I see Dr. Washington's
name is on here too.
227
00:10:35,635 --> 00:10:37,418
Hard times mean
hard decisions.
228
00:10:37,419 --> 00:10:40,682
So you're gonna fire
our highly respected
229
00:10:40,683 --> 00:10:44,686
chief of oncology who's
been here nearly two decades?
230
00:10:44,687 --> 00:10:46,514
I know that your
ongoing relationship
231
00:10:46,515 --> 00:10:49,691
with Dr. Washington might
make this more complicated.
232
00:10:49,692 --> 00:10:51,693
Complicated?
233
00:10:51,694 --> 00:10:53,216
How?
234
00:10:53,217 --> 00:10:54,827
If you'd like
someone else to handle this--
235
00:10:54,828 --> 00:10:56,176
I'll handle it.
236
00:10:56,177 --> 00:10:58,134
Thank you for your
professionalism, Sharon.
237
00:10:58,135 --> 00:10:59,659
Uh-huh.
238
00:11:09,190 --> 00:11:12,148
I just hope this is
a kick in the ass for Kip.
239
00:11:12,149 --> 00:11:13,715
He needs to move forward
240
00:11:13,716 --> 00:11:15,717
and no longer has prion
as an excuse.
241
00:11:15,718 --> 00:11:17,284
Yeah, well,
he'll figure it out, right?
242
00:11:17,285 --> 00:11:20,069
Well, Kip generally resists
figuring things out.
243
00:11:20,070 --> 00:11:22,158
He prefers to drift.
244
00:11:22,159 --> 00:11:23,899
What about you?
245
00:11:23,900 --> 00:11:25,553
What about me?
246
00:11:25,554 --> 00:11:28,077
Well, this changes things
for you too.
247
00:11:28,078 --> 00:11:30,732
This changes nothing.
I simply go back to work.
248
00:11:30,733 --> 00:11:32,473
Ah, don't underestimate
the significance
249
00:11:32,474 --> 00:11:35,041
of a negative result.
250
00:11:35,042 --> 00:11:37,521
Your future
is more certain now.
251
00:11:37,522 --> 00:11:39,872
Sure, if I don't
drown in a lake
252
00:11:39,873 --> 00:11:42,918
or have a sudden
fatal heart attack.
253
00:11:42,919 --> 00:11:44,267
You know what you should do, though?
254
00:11:44,268 --> 00:11:45,399
You should travel.
255
00:11:45,400 --> 00:11:46,748
Yeah, get out of here.
256
00:11:46,749 --> 00:11:49,925
Just take a leave,
one to two months, you know.
257
00:11:49,926 --> 00:11:52,449
Just sit on
the Spanish Steps in Rome
258
00:11:52,450 --> 00:11:55,017
or just look out at Barcelona
259
00:11:55,018 --> 00:11:56,932
from the top
of the Sagrada Familia.
260
00:11:56,933 --> 00:11:59,762
Are these things
that you've done?
261
00:12:01,503 --> 00:12:04,592
So the point is that
an emergency department
262
00:12:04,593 --> 00:12:06,115
is like a Vegas casino.
263
00:12:06,116 --> 00:12:10,293
It tricks you into believing
that time isn't passing.
264
00:12:10,294 --> 00:12:11,773
It is.
265
00:12:11,774 --> 00:12:13,644
Well, vacations
make me anxious.
266
00:12:13,645 --> 00:12:15,734
I'm always too hot or too cold.
267
00:12:15,735 --> 00:12:16,996
I don't speak the language,
268
00:12:16,997 --> 00:12:18,780
and my credit card bill
explodes.
269
00:12:18,781 --> 00:12:20,782
And I always end up just
counting down the days
270
00:12:20,783 --> 00:12:23,263
until I can get back to work.
271
00:12:23,264 --> 00:12:26,788
That is deeply sad,
but very on brand.
272
00:12:26,789 --> 00:12:28,617
Cold, dead hearts, remember?
273
00:12:32,360 --> 00:12:33,795
There you go.
274
00:12:33,796 --> 00:12:36,755
I hear that Dr. Masukawa
and her surgical team
275
00:12:36,756 --> 00:12:38,408
will be by soon
to get you prepped
276
00:12:38,409 --> 00:12:40,497
and transferred to the OR.
277
00:12:40,498 --> 00:12:42,064
Is it true?
278
00:12:42,065 --> 00:12:43,457
Is what true?
279
00:12:43,458 --> 00:12:47,809
Did my dad steal my lungs
from somebody else?
280
00:12:47,810 --> 00:12:50,377
I overheard someone
in the hallway.
281
00:12:50,378 --> 00:12:54,642
Organ donation is
an imperfect process, Alea.
282
00:12:54,643 --> 00:12:56,992
There's all kinds of
conflicting factors
283
00:12:56,993 --> 00:12:58,559
that can affect who gets them.
284
00:12:58,560 --> 00:13:00,648
But there's never enough
organs to go around,
285
00:13:00,649 --> 00:13:02,911
so what's a miracle for you
286
00:13:02,912 --> 00:13:06,219
will always be a heartbreak
for someone else.
287
00:13:06,220 --> 00:13:08,613
That sounds like a yes.
288
00:13:09,789 --> 00:13:12,573
Your father loves you.
289
00:13:12,574 --> 00:13:14,270
I know.
290
00:13:14,271 --> 00:13:16,751
Save your strength
and get some rest.
291
00:13:16,752 --> 00:13:18,840
Focus on your surgery.
292
00:13:18,841 --> 00:13:21,974
That's excellent advice, sweetheart.
293
00:13:21,975 --> 00:13:24,193
I thought you weren't
going to be caring
294
00:13:24,194 --> 00:13:25,847
for my daughter anymore.
295
00:13:25,848 --> 00:13:28,807
You only asked
for Dr. Ripley to step aside,
296
00:13:28,808 --> 00:13:31,766
and there are just
so many nurses.
297
00:13:31,767 --> 00:13:33,594
I like Maggie.
298
00:13:33,595 --> 00:13:35,204
I want her to stay.
299
00:13:37,686 --> 00:13:40,383
Don't worry about anything
300
00:13:40,384 --> 00:13:44,126
except what needs
to be done next.
301
00:13:44,127 --> 00:13:49,001
You just focus on conquering
each obstacle in front of you
302
00:13:49,002 --> 00:13:54,571
until, eventually,
you win the race.
303
00:13:54,572 --> 00:13:57,531
And what if the race
is unwinnable?
304
00:14:04,191 --> 00:14:05,888
No such thing.
305
00:14:12,939 --> 00:14:14,896
Is it time to sedate me?
306
00:14:14,897 --> 00:14:17,551
When you're ready.
307
00:14:17,552 --> 00:14:19,379
You doing okay?
308
00:14:19,380 --> 00:14:21,208
I'm fine.
309
00:14:23,863 --> 00:14:27,648
You know, you don't
have to be fine, Noah.
310
00:14:27,649 --> 00:14:29,215
It's okay to be scared.
311
00:14:29,216 --> 00:14:31,043
You know that, right?
312
00:14:31,044 --> 00:14:33,872
That's the thing, Dr. Frost.
313
00:14:33,873 --> 00:14:36,439
I'm not scared.
314
00:14:36,440 --> 00:14:38,137
I'm tired.
315
00:14:38,138 --> 00:14:41,270
So, so tired.
316
00:14:41,271 --> 00:14:45,448
I don't wanna die, but...
317
00:14:45,449 --> 00:14:50,801
the thought of going to sleep
and not waking up
318
00:14:50,802 --> 00:14:53,892
is not--not so bad.
319
00:14:53,893 --> 00:14:56,459
But I can't
tell my parents that.
320
00:14:56,460 --> 00:14:58,722
It would break their heart.
321
00:14:58,723 --> 00:15:00,812
I have to be strong for them.
322
00:15:03,250 --> 00:15:04,904
Especially Dad.
323
00:15:06,862 --> 00:15:12,084
Hey, I can understand
all of that,
324
00:15:12,085 --> 00:15:14,434
okay, but here's the thing.
325
00:15:14,435 --> 00:15:18,133
I think you still got
some fight left in you.
326
00:15:18,134 --> 00:15:22,398
I need you to do something
for me, Dr. Frost.
327
00:15:22,399 --> 00:15:24,487
Anything.
328
00:15:24,488 --> 00:15:27,099
If I die...
329
00:15:27,100 --> 00:15:30,190
will you tell my parents
it's not their fault?
330
00:15:32,801 --> 00:15:34,628
Hey.
331
00:15:34,629 --> 00:15:36,151
Hey, how are you, buddy?
332
00:15:36,152 --> 00:15:40,895
Hey, Grandma and Grandpa
send love and strength.
333
00:15:40,896 --> 00:15:42,897
Okay, Dr. Frost.
334
00:15:42,898 --> 00:15:45,247
Oh, please, wait.
335
00:15:45,248 --> 00:15:46,988
Wait.
336
00:15:46,989 --> 00:15:48,381
Noah, the next time we see you,
337
00:15:48,382 --> 00:15:49,817
you're gonna have
a new pair of lungs.
338
00:15:49,818 --> 00:15:52,341
Yeah.
339
00:15:52,342 --> 00:15:56,432
Hey, the thing I'm proudest of
in all the world
340
00:15:56,433 --> 00:15:58,130
is being your dad.
341
00:15:58,131 --> 00:16:00,871
I'm scared.
342
00:16:00,872 --> 00:16:03,091
Me, too, buddy.
343
00:16:03,092 --> 00:16:05,876
But you're--hey,
you're gonna be fine.
344
00:16:05,877 --> 00:16:08,618
I love you both so much.
345
00:16:08,619 --> 00:16:11,317
We love you,
our precious boy.
346
00:16:11,318 --> 00:16:14,060
More than you can
possibly imagine.
347
00:16:15,844 --> 00:16:18,454
Okay.
348
00:16:18,455 --> 00:16:19,979
I'm ready.
349
00:16:22,416 --> 00:16:23,894
Hey.
350
00:16:23,895 --> 00:16:25,809
I'm gonna see you soon,
okay, Noah?
351
00:16:42,784 --> 00:16:44,176
Good timing.
352
00:16:44,177 --> 00:16:46,395
- Dad.
- I'm right here, sweetie.
353
00:16:46,396 --> 00:16:48,093
How you doing?
Are you all right?
354
00:16:48,094 --> 00:16:50,051
How's my girl?
- Much better.
355
00:16:50,052 --> 00:16:53,272
I'm keeping a close eye on her
O2 sats for the rib fractures
356
00:16:53,273 --> 00:16:54,838
and her neuro checks
for the concussion,
357
00:16:54,839 --> 00:17:00,105
but, um, all things considered,
she's very lucky.
358
00:17:00,106 --> 00:17:02,063
Um, I feel kind of out of it.
359
00:17:02,064 --> 00:17:03,238
Pain meds, honey.
360
00:17:03,239 --> 00:17:04,805
Just--they're gonna
make you groggy.
361
00:17:04,806 --> 00:17:06,154
That's all it is.
362
00:17:06,155 --> 00:17:07,851
I'll check back in
a little later.
363
00:17:07,852 --> 00:17:11,377
Do you even
remember what happened?
364
00:17:11,378 --> 00:17:12,421
Oh, I don't know.
365
00:17:12,422 --> 00:17:14,249
I--I think I hit
a patch of gravel,
366
00:17:14,250 --> 00:17:17,600
and the car just
kind of got away from me.
367
00:17:17,601 --> 00:17:20,429
I'm just curious why you
didn't have your seat belt on.
368
00:17:20,430 --> 00:17:22,214
That is so unlike you.
369
00:17:22,215 --> 00:17:23,824
When you were a little kid,
you wouldn't--
370
00:17:23,825 --> 00:17:25,521
you wouldn't even
let me start the car
371
00:17:25,522 --> 00:17:27,697
unless everybody
was buckled up.
372
00:17:27,698 --> 00:17:28,872
I don't remember.
373
00:17:28,873 --> 00:17:30,526
I guess I forgot.
374
00:17:30,527 --> 00:17:32,441
I'm worried about you. I am.
375
00:17:32,442 --> 00:17:34,226
Ever since you--you came home,
and you told me
376
00:17:34,227 --> 00:17:35,314
you dropped out of school.
377
00:17:35,315 --> 00:17:36,750
I don't even--
- Dad--
378
00:17:36,751 --> 00:17:38,317
I do not under--
no, no, I just don't understand
379
00:17:38,318 --> 00:17:39,579
why you didn't feel like
you could talk to me.
380
00:17:39,580 --> 00:17:40,493
Dad, you're the last person
I would want
381
00:17:40,494 --> 00:17:41,842
to talk to about anything.
382
00:17:41,843 --> 00:17:43,104
What?
383
00:17:44,715 --> 00:17:47,543
We--we were always pretty good
at having those conversations.
384
00:17:47,544 --> 00:17:49,589
That was
a long time ago, Dad.
385
00:17:49,590 --> 00:17:51,069
It was?
386
00:17:51,070 --> 00:17:52,722
I don't need you analyzing me
and giving me advice
387
00:17:52,723 --> 00:17:54,463
based on some patient
you just had,
388
00:17:54,464 --> 00:17:56,465
who you've just suddenly
decided to compare me to.
389
00:17:56,466 --> 00:17:58,424
I'm not your puzzle to solve.
390
00:17:58,425 --> 00:18:00,643
I'm your daughter.
391
00:18:00,644 --> 00:18:04,691
Dad, can I talk to you
for a moment?
392
00:18:11,046 --> 00:18:12,655
Oh, my God, honey.
393
00:18:12,656 --> 00:18:14,831
- Dad--
- I think that your--
394
00:18:14,832 --> 00:18:16,790
I think your sister--
- I--I know.
395
00:18:16,791 --> 00:18:19,445
Anna drove into that tree
on purpose.
396
00:18:19,446 --> 00:18:21,969
She's been home with you
for, what, a month?
397
00:18:21,970 --> 00:18:25,364
I mean, did--did you know
she was depressed?
398
00:18:25,365 --> 00:18:27,975
I suspected.
399
00:18:27,976 --> 00:18:30,499
And you didn't think
to clue me in, Robin?
400
00:18:30,500 --> 00:18:32,675
You know all about
our family history.
401
00:18:32,676 --> 00:18:35,678
I never imagined
that it was this bad.
402
00:18:35,679 --> 00:18:37,680
Instead, I get
this dog and pony show
403
00:18:37,681 --> 00:18:40,074
with luggage about being
late from the airport
404
00:18:40,075 --> 00:18:42,294
for Granny's funeral
'cause of all the traffic?
405
00:18:42,295 --> 00:18:45,601
I didn't tell you because
Anna didn't want you to know.
406
00:18:45,602 --> 00:18:47,647
She's my sister.
I was respecting her privacy.
407
00:18:47,648 --> 00:18:49,779
- I'm her father.
- That is the problem.
408
00:18:49,780 --> 00:18:51,694
Honey, she just tried
to kill herself.
409
00:18:51,695 --> 00:18:54,871
Dad, I'm sorry,
but it is not as easy to talk
410
00:18:54,872 --> 00:18:56,699
to you about this stuff--
- Oh, Jesus Christ!
411
00:18:56,700 --> 00:18:58,919
You too? You too?
- Yes. Me, too, Dad.
412
00:18:58,920 --> 00:19:01,182
There is a line
between you being our dad
413
00:19:01,183 --> 00:19:02,749
and you being a shrink,
414
00:19:02,750 --> 00:19:06,753
and sometimes you can't stop
yourself from crossing it.
415
00:19:10,366 --> 00:19:13,063
- Hey, there.
- Hey.
416
00:19:13,064 --> 00:19:15,109
Mm!
417
00:19:15,110 --> 00:19:17,503
Everything okay?
418
00:19:17,504 --> 00:19:21,246
Uh, Dennis,
I wanted to let you know
419
00:19:21,247 --> 00:19:23,465
that the board is concerned
about the budget
420
00:19:23,466 --> 00:19:26,555
in the wake
of Dr. Hayes's dismissal.
421
00:19:26,556 --> 00:19:28,514
And I'm on
the chopping block.
422
00:19:28,515 --> 00:19:30,908
You are, yes.
423
00:19:36,871 --> 00:19:38,915
I lose my title
and take a salary cut?
424
00:19:38,916 --> 00:19:41,962
Well, it's a fairly minor
salary cut
425
00:19:41,963 --> 00:19:45,226
if you factor in
a higher annual bonus.
426
00:19:45,227 --> 00:19:47,272
I know it's not ideal.
427
00:19:47,273 --> 00:19:49,535
That's an understatement.
428
00:19:49,536 --> 00:19:52,190
It'll keep you
at the hospital, Dennis.
429
00:19:57,631 --> 00:19:59,849
My title is everything, Sharon.
430
00:19:59,850 --> 00:20:01,416
It's what I've worked for
over a long
431
00:20:01,417 --> 00:20:03,026
and distinguished career.
432
00:20:03,027 --> 00:20:04,332
And you know that.
433
00:20:04,333 --> 00:20:06,813
It's the best deal
I could get, Dennis.
434
00:20:06,814 --> 00:20:08,380
Oh, really?
435
00:20:08,381 --> 00:20:09,772
Did you threaten to walk?
436
00:20:09,773 --> 00:20:12,384
Offer to take
a pay cut yourself?
437
00:20:12,385 --> 00:20:14,908
A lesser title?
438
00:20:14,909 --> 00:20:17,302
I didn't think so.
439
00:20:17,303 --> 00:20:20,653
The only one out here
on a limb is me.
440
00:20:20,654 --> 00:20:23,351
And I'm caught
between you and the board,
441
00:20:23,352 --> 00:20:26,267
and I'm paying
a pretty steep price.
442
00:20:26,268 --> 00:20:27,835
You're right.
443
00:20:29,663 --> 00:20:31,272
You'll have my resignation
on your desk
444
00:20:31,273 --> 00:20:32,970
by the end of the day.
445
00:20:36,322 --> 00:20:39,977
I'm pretty sure that Anna...
446
00:20:41,675 --> 00:20:44,807
Tried to kill herself
this morning.
447
00:20:44,808 --> 00:20:49,464
She, um, won't talk to me,
for the first time ever.
448
00:20:49,465 --> 00:20:54,556
And, um, I don't
know what to do.
449
00:20:54,557 --> 00:20:56,993
I'm so sorry, Daniel.
450
00:20:56,994 --> 00:20:59,169
But I'm really glad
you reached out.
451
00:21:06,134 --> 00:21:12,095
Both Anna and Robin, earlier
today, in their own way,
452
00:21:12,096 --> 00:21:16,839
told me maybe I'm not so...
453
00:21:16,840 --> 00:21:19,102
easy to talk to,
454
00:21:19,103 --> 00:21:22,628
confide in,
as perhaps I thought I was.
455
00:21:22,629 --> 00:21:26,196
Sound familiar?
456
00:21:26,197 --> 00:21:27,589
Take it easy on yourself.
457
00:21:27,590 --> 00:21:29,983
I mean, I always knew
I left a lot to be desired
458
00:21:29,984 --> 00:21:33,856
in the husband department,
but I mean,
459
00:21:33,857 --> 00:21:36,076
I thought I was
a pretty good dad.
460
00:21:36,077 --> 00:21:39,514
Apparently, I've let
the shrink part get in the way,
461
00:21:39,515 --> 00:21:40,907
despite my best efforts.
462
00:21:40,908 --> 00:21:43,083
Would you consider
the possibility
463
00:21:43,084 --> 00:21:45,085
you're a good dad
because you're a shrink?
464
00:21:45,086 --> 00:21:47,696
No, I wouldn't,
especially not today.
465
00:21:47,697 --> 00:21:49,916
Sarah, I didn't come here
466
00:21:49,917 --> 00:21:51,396
so you'd let me off the hook, okay?
467
00:21:51,397 --> 00:21:53,702
Well, it's clear to me
you are not interested
468
00:21:53,703 --> 00:21:55,922
in being let off the hook
by anyone,
469
00:21:55,923 --> 00:21:57,576
least of all yourself.
470
00:21:57,577 --> 00:21:59,578
I'm just wondering why that is.
471
00:22:02,538 --> 00:22:04,583
'Cause it's my fault.
472
00:22:04,584 --> 00:22:06,193
Why?
473
00:22:06,194 --> 00:22:09,370
When I was locked in my
30-year cold war with my mom,
474
00:22:09,371 --> 00:22:11,372
I swore to myself
my relationship with my kids
475
00:22:11,373 --> 00:22:14,593
would be different,
that they would always know
476
00:22:14,594 --> 00:22:17,770
that I was there for them,
that--that I was their friend,
477
00:22:17,771 --> 00:22:20,076
and that they would talk to me.
478
00:22:20,077 --> 00:22:23,863
But I think that
the sad truth is,
479
00:22:23,864 --> 00:22:26,996
I just have no tolerance
for their pain,
480
00:22:26,997 --> 00:22:31,479
and it's my desperation
to fix it--
481
00:22:31,480 --> 00:22:33,133
maybe drives them away.
482
00:22:33,134 --> 00:22:35,309
Daniel, all we can
ever be is our best.
483
00:22:35,310 --> 00:22:38,617
And as far as Anna,
what I'm hearing is that
484
00:22:38,618 --> 00:22:44,318
she needs you to completely
put the shrink away.
485
00:22:44,319 --> 00:22:46,408
What she needs right now
is her dad.
486
00:22:50,499 --> 00:22:51,978
Hey.
487
00:22:51,979 --> 00:22:53,849
Uh, any update
on the transplant team?
488
00:22:53,850 --> 00:22:57,113
Dr. Masukawa said they'd be
down here within the hour.
489
00:22:57,114 --> 00:23:00,466
No, actually, I was told
that Alea wanted to see me.
490
00:23:02,642 --> 00:23:05,034
I have some questions
about my condition.
491
00:23:05,035 --> 00:23:08,429
Then you should ask
Dr. Masukawa, not a nurse.
492
00:23:08,430 --> 00:23:10,910
Dr. Masukawa avoids
my questions
493
00:23:10,911 --> 00:23:13,260
because she's afraid
to piss you off.
494
00:23:16,046 --> 00:23:18,047
Maggie, come in.
495
00:23:18,048 --> 00:23:22,226
I wanna know more about the kid
my dad took the new lungs from.
496
00:23:23,793 --> 00:23:26,665
She didn't say a word, Dad.
497
00:23:26,666 --> 00:23:30,016
I have eyes and ears.
498
00:23:30,017 --> 00:23:32,061
Well, after my doctors
499
00:23:32,062 --> 00:23:34,194
assessed your
current condition,
500
00:23:34,195 --> 00:23:37,632
yes, the ODA determined that
you were a better candidate
501
00:23:37,633 --> 00:23:39,286
for the donated lungs,
502
00:23:39,287 --> 00:23:43,333
and they were
reassigned to you.
503
00:23:43,334 --> 00:23:45,466
Meaning you bent them
to your will.
504
00:23:45,467 --> 00:23:49,122
You need those lungs
more than that boy.
505
00:23:49,123 --> 00:23:51,472
Is that true, Maggie?
506
00:23:53,388 --> 00:23:56,129
Those lungs could buy him
another 30 years.
507
00:23:56,130 --> 00:23:58,784
Well, you just threw your
career away, didn't you?
508
00:23:58,785 --> 00:24:02,962
Stop bullying everyone
for telling me the truth, Dad.
509
00:24:02,963 --> 00:24:05,051
I hate that part of you.
510
00:24:13,016 --> 00:24:16,541
How much time would
the lungs give me?
511
00:24:16,542 --> 00:24:19,282
Okay.
512
00:24:19,283 --> 00:24:23,505
Alea, I'm not a doctor,
but maybe a few months.
513
00:24:25,464 --> 00:24:28,118
But I'm not trying to stop you
from having the surgery.
514
00:24:29,642 --> 00:24:32,426
The lungs are yours,
and you deserve
515
00:24:32,427 --> 00:24:35,516
a chance to live
as much as that boy does.
516
00:24:35,517 --> 00:24:38,215
But those are the facts.
517
00:24:39,956 --> 00:24:41,740
Thank you, Maggie.
518
00:24:41,741 --> 00:24:43,307
Okay.
519
00:24:47,137 --> 00:24:48,703
It's simple math.
520
00:24:48,704 --> 00:24:50,575
No, Alea.
521
00:24:50,576 --> 00:24:54,274
People always use statistics
and opinions
522
00:24:54,275 --> 00:24:56,102
to tell you
something's impossible.
523
00:24:56,103 --> 00:24:59,148
The world has no lack
of cold water
524
00:24:59,149 --> 00:25:02,761
to throw on fresh ideas
that have the possibility
525
00:25:02,762 --> 00:25:04,502
of beating the odds.
526
00:25:04,503 --> 00:25:08,854
I got to where I am by only
trusting my own counsel.
527
00:25:08,855 --> 00:25:10,420
I taught you to do the same.
528
00:25:10,421 --> 00:25:12,598
I do trust my own counsel.
529
00:25:14,948 --> 00:25:17,166
Which is why
I'm not taking the lungs.
530
00:25:17,167 --> 00:25:19,299
You will.
You will take them.
531
00:25:19,300 --> 00:25:21,606
Yes, you will.
- Look at him.
532
00:25:21,607 --> 00:25:23,216
Look at Noah.
533
00:25:23,217 --> 00:25:25,914
No, there--there--
there are no other options.
534
00:25:25,915 --> 00:25:27,960
Look at the life
you're taking.
535
00:25:27,961 --> 00:25:29,570
I will not allow you to die.
536
00:25:29,571 --> 00:25:33,661
Do you hear me?
You are everything to me.
537
00:25:33,662 --> 00:25:36,098
You're the only good thing
in this world.
538
00:25:36,099 --> 00:25:39,624
You have a life
that you deserve to live,
539
00:25:39,625 --> 00:25:42,975
and I sure as hell
am gonna make sure you have it.
540
00:25:42,976 --> 00:25:46,587
I know you love me.
541
00:25:47,894 --> 00:25:51,984
You don't say it much,
but I always feel it.
542
00:25:51,985 --> 00:25:54,943
I love you too.
543
00:25:54,944 --> 00:25:59,644
But please, please,
look at him.
544
00:26:15,574 --> 00:26:19,011
I couldn't--
545
00:26:19,012 --> 00:26:22,536
I couldn't save your mother.
546
00:26:22,537 --> 00:26:26,192
I--Alea, I--
547
00:26:26,193 --> 00:26:28,629
I can't lose you too.
548
00:26:29,979 --> 00:26:32,677
We don't have a choice.
549
00:26:32,678 --> 00:26:34,592
I love you.
550
00:26:40,033 --> 00:26:41,600
It's okay.
551
00:26:45,386 --> 00:26:48,215
It's gonna be okay.
552
00:26:51,435 --> 00:26:53,176
My resignation letter.
553
00:26:54,613 --> 00:26:57,789
I was hoping
you'd change your mind.
554
00:26:57,790 --> 00:26:59,834
I gave it a lot of thought.
555
00:26:59,835 --> 00:27:02,576
But in the end,
nothing changed for me.
556
00:27:02,577 --> 00:27:06,667
But I do wanna apologize for
the way I spoke to you earlier.
557
00:27:06,668 --> 00:27:08,364
I got personal.
558
00:27:08,365 --> 00:27:10,323
I wasn't playing fair.
559
00:27:10,324 --> 00:27:14,414
Well, I understand
your anger, Dennis.
560
00:27:14,415 --> 00:27:19,375
I do.
You are collateral damage.
561
00:27:19,376 --> 00:27:22,596
But, you know, I realized
I've got some anger of my own,
562
00:27:22,597 --> 00:27:24,816
and I need to be honest
about that.
563
00:27:24,817 --> 00:27:26,078
This is about Alex.
564
00:27:26,079 --> 00:27:27,906
Well, that's why I moved out.
565
00:27:27,907 --> 00:27:30,212
You know, we had been
together over a year,
566
00:27:30,213 --> 00:27:32,650
and your daughter
didn't know I existed.
567
00:27:32,651 --> 00:27:34,129
I explained why
I kept it from her.
568
00:27:34,130 --> 00:27:36,305
You made excuses, Dennis,
569
00:27:36,306 --> 00:27:38,917
that still don't
hold water for me.
570
00:27:38,918 --> 00:27:42,007
- Sharon--
- You know...
571
00:27:42,008 --> 00:27:47,577
you asked me
to let you into my life,
572
00:27:47,578 --> 00:27:52,452
and I did,
because I believed in us.
573
00:27:52,453 --> 00:27:56,978
But you didn't give me
the same respect.
574
00:27:59,895 --> 00:28:02,289
And that hurt me deeply.
575
00:28:04,508 --> 00:28:08,337
I made a mistake,
which I apologized for.
576
00:28:08,338 --> 00:28:11,079
You're choosing
to hold onto this.
577
00:28:11,080 --> 00:28:16,476
Well, what would that say
about me if I did let it stand?
578
00:28:16,477 --> 00:28:21,568
What would that say
about our relationship?
579
00:28:21,569 --> 00:28:23,657
Now...
580
00:28:23,658 --> 00:28:27,705
I think it's time
we went our separate ways.
581
00:28:27,706 --> 00:28:31,143
Sharon, can I be honest
with you?
582
00:28:31,144 --> 00:28:33,145
Please.
583
00:28:33,146 --> 00:28:37,149
You went through a traumatic
experience a few months ago.
584
00:28:37,150 --> 00:28:39,804
We almost lost you.
585
00:28:39,805 --> 00:28:43,547
And I don't think you ever
fully dealt with that.
586
00:28:47,464 --> 00:28:52,513
Uh--it's not about
emotions, Dennis.
587
00:28:54,558 --> 00:28:56,909
It's about respect.
588
00:28:59,738 --> 00:29:03,131
And I accept your letter
of resignation.
589
00:29:31,900 --> 00:29:33,422
Hey, when you see my husband,
590
00:29:33,423 --> 00:29:35,163
can you tell him where I am
and what's happening?
591
00:29:35,164 --> 00:29:36,817
'Cause he has no clue
Noah's getting the lungs.
592
00:29:36,818 --> 00:29:38,123
You still haven't
gotten ahold of him?
593
00:29:38,124 --> 00:29:39,646
I tried calling him,
but he forgot his phone.
594
00:29:39,647 --> 00:29:41,214
Yeah, go. I'll let him know.
595
00:29:44,870 --> 00:29:46,175
How you feeling, honey?
596
00:29:47,916 --> 00:29:49,438
I mean,
it hurts when I breathe,
597
00:29:49,439 --> 00:29:52,441
but other than that, better.
598
00:29:52,442 --> 00:29:55,662
Oh, good. Good.
599
00:29:55,663 --> 00:29:58,534
Um...
600
00:29:58,535 --> 00:30:02,931
sweetie, I've been thinking
about what you said, and, um...
601
00:30:04,846 --> 00:30:06,194
I'm a shrink.
602
00:30:06,195 --> 00:30:10,851
You know, and it seems that
as hard as I try
603
00:30:10,852 --> 00:30:15,073
to not let that bleed
into my parenting skills
604
00:30:15,074 --> 00:30:18,511
or lack thereof, I have failed.
605
00:30:18,512 --> 00:30:20,034
Dad, you don't
have to try to--
606
00:30:20,035 --> 00:30:21,820
You know, honey,
I actually do.
607
00:30:25,562 --> 00:30:30,697
I overreacted in a really
inappropriate way earlier,
608
00:30:30,698 --> 00:30:33,047
and I'm sorry.
609
00:30:33,048 --> 00:30:34,875
Sincerely, honey, I apologize.
610
00:30:34,876 --> 00:30:37,878
It's just that, you know,
we've got this history
611
00:30:37,879 --> 00:30:39,880
of depression in our family,
612
00:30:39,881 --> 00:30:43,362
and you seem to be
in a dark place, and--
613
00:30:43,363 --> 00:30:44,929
Dad, I'm not depressed.
614
00:30:44,930 --> 00:30:47,583
Do you mind--do you mind
just hearing me out for a bit?
615
00:30:47,584 --> 00:30:50,717
So, you know, when I was a kid,
616
00:30:50,718 --> 00:30:55,374
my dad seemed to be
in a dark place a lot, right?
617
00:30:55,375 --> 00:30:58,246
We didn't use the word
"depression" in my family.
618
00:30:58,247 --> 00:31:01,902
It was always like,
oh, Dad's a little blue.
619
00:31:01,903 --> 00:31:04,470
You know, Dad's just
really, really tired.
620
00:31:04,471 --> 00:31:06,080
I know the story already.
621
00:31:06,081 --> 00:31:07,952
Yeah, but you don't know
all of it,
622
00:31:07,953 --> 00:31:10,476
and I promised myself
I'd tell you as soon as
623
00:31:10,477 --> 00:31:12,826
you got a little older,
and I just--
624
00:31:12,827 --> 00:31:17,091
well, anyway,
I loved my dad, right?
625
00:31:17,092 --> 00:31:21,617
And I was pretty sure that
he was depressed, right?
626
00:31:21,618 --> 00:31:25,578
So I just read any book
I could get my hands on
627
00:31:25,579 --> 00:31:28,450
that might teach me how to--
I don't know--help him.
628
00:31:28,451 --> 00:31:31,149
Yeah, and that was your first
step toward becoming a shrink.
629
00:31:31,150 --> 00:31:37,024
And then, one weekend, um,
I came home from college.
630
00:31:37,025 --> 00:31:41,986
It was a Saturday morning,
and I slept late.
631
00:31:41,987 --> 00:31:45,946
And I guess Mom had
already left the house,
632
00:31:45,947 --> 00:31:48,035
and so I went down, and I--
633
00:31:48,036 --> 00:31:49,950
I made myself some breakfast.
634
00:31:49,951 --> 00:31:53,954
And that's when--
635
00:31:53,955 --> 00:31:56,957
that's when I smelled
the, uh, the fumes.
636
00:31:56,958 --> 00:31:59,133
The, uh, garage was
right off the kitchen,
637
00:31:59,134 --> 00:32:02,963
and I opened up the door,
and then all the--
638
00:32:05,619 --> 00:32:08,751
All the smoke just
started to billow out.
639
00:32:08,752 --> 00:32:11,537
And, um...
640
00:32:11,538 --> 00:32:14,279
you know, Dad had
rolled up all the windows
641
00:32:14,280 --> 00:32:17,064
and used a garden hose
and some duct tape,
642
00:32:17,065 --> 00:32:19,806
piped the exhaust in through
the driver's-side window,
643
00:32:19,807 --> 00:32:23,505
and been dead for hours, honey.
644
00:32:23,506 --> 00:32:28,032
And my entire life,
I just have regretted
645
00:32:28,033 --> 00:32:30,904
not being more proactive
about reaching out,
646
00:32:30,905 --> 00:32:33,776
saying, Dad, you know,
what's going on?
647
00:32:33,777 --> 00:32:35,256
You know?
648
00:32:35,257 --> 00:32:39,260
I regret so much that I
succumbed to this ridiculous,
649
00:32:39,261 --> 00:32:43,873
you know, "we don't talk about
that kind of thing" taboo BS
650
00:32:43,874 --> 00:32:46,050
that was rampant
in my household.
651
00:32:46,051 --> 00:32:49,183
You know,
if only I'd have known
652
00:32:49,184 --> 00:32:53,492
how much pain he was in,
how alone he was,
653
00:32:53,493 --> 00:32:56,016
how much shame he was
made to feel for something
654
00:32:56,017 --> 00:32:59,628
that wasn't his fault.
655
00:32:59,629 --> 00:33:02,588
Dad, I'm so sorry.
656
00:33:02,589 --> 00:33:06,157
I didn't know what was
happening to me, and I--
657
00:33:06,158 --> 00:33:09,334
I thought I could just
hold on a little longer
658
00:33:09,335 --> 00:33:11,685
and maybe it would all go away.
659
00:33:13,774 --> 00:33:18,257
And it didn't,
and I felt like such a freak.
660
00:33:19,998 --> 00:33:23,043
And I thought
about calling you.
661
00:33:23,044 --> 00:33:27,004
I did.
But I was so embarrassed.
662
00:33:27,005 --> 00:33:28,614
And I know that
Stanford isn't cheap,
663
00:33:28,615 --> 00:33:30,485
and I didn't wanna
disappoint you,
664
00:33:30,486 --> 00:33:34,359
and at Granny's funeral,
I could see that I had.
665
00:33:34,360 --> 00:33:36,796
Honey, honey, honey,
look at me.
666
00:33:36,797 --> 00:33:38,406
Look at me.
667
00:33:38,407 --> 00:33:42,628
You are incapable
of disappointing me.
668
00:33:42,629 --> 00:33:46,240
I didn't know
what else to do, Dad.
669
00:33:46,241 --> 00:33:48,329
When I got in my car
this morning,
670
00:33:48,330 --> 00:33:52,638
it just seemed like
the only option.
671
00:33:52,639 --> 00:33:54,509
It has for a while now.
672
00:33:57,165 --> 00:34:01,125
You have any idea
how proud I am of you
673
00:34:01,126 --> 00:34:03,301
for saying that out loud?
- I'm sorry.
674
00:34:03,302 --> 00:34:05,912
You have nothing
to be sorry about, honey.
675
00:34:05,913 --> 00:34:09,611
Look, we're gonna
figure this out.
676
00:34:09,612 --> 00:34:11,222
I do need you, Dad.
677
00:34:11,223 --> 00:34:14,181
And I will always be here
to talk to you
678
00:34:14,182 --> 00:34:16,531
about whatever
you wanna talk about.
679
00:34:16,532 --> 00:34:19,447
But how about this?
680
00:34:19,448 --> 00:34:25,627
Let's say if ever we start
to stray into this area,
681
00:34:25,628 --> 00:34:29,979
I promise you
from the bottom of my heart,
682
00:34:29,980 --> 00:34:31,765
all I'm gonna do is listen.
683
00:34:33,854 --> 00:34:35,420
Okay?
684
00:34:35,421 --> 00:34:37,031
Okay.
685
00:34:40,556 --> 00:34:42,079
Oh.
686
00:34:42,080 --> 00:34:44,038
It'll be okay.
687
00:34:51,654 --> 00:34:53,569
Where is he?
Where's my son?
688
00:34:56,572 --> 00:35:00,967
No. No.
689
00:35:00,968 --> 00:35:04,579
Thank you.
In six or seven hours.
690
00:35:04,580 --> 00:35:05,928
Lancer!
691
00:35:05,929 --> 00:35:07,147
You selfish son of a bitch!
692
00:35:07,148 --> 00:35:08,670
Take a step back.
693
00:35:08,671 --> 00:35:09,715
Hey!
694
00:35:09,716 --> 00:35:11,151
I think you need
to walk away.
695
00:35:11,152 --> 00:35:12,848
Look at me!
Admit what you did!
696
00:35:12,849 --> 00:35:15,155
Admit that you killed my son!
697
00:35:15,156 --> 00:35:16,374
- Gun!
- Got the gun!
698
00:35:17,419 --> 00:35:18,985
Get the hell away from me!
699
00:35:18,986 --> 00:35:20,726
Dad? What's happening?
700
00:35:20,727 --> 00:35:23,163
Everything's gonna be fine, sweetie.
701
00:35:23,164 --> 00:35:25,644
You need to calm down.
702
00:35:25,645 --> 00:35:28,516
I--I didn't want this,
any of this.
703
00:35:28,517 --> 00:35:30,518
You're clearly not
up to speed.
704
00:35:30,519 --> 00:35:32,781
What--what are you
talking about?
705
00:35:32,782 --> 00:35:36,872
My daughter gave
those lungs to your son.
706
00:35:36,873 --> 00:35:38,831
He's up in surgery right now.
707
00:35:38,832 --> 00:35:41,529
No, you're just saying
whatever you need to
708
00:35:41,530 --> 00:35:43,227
to get me to put the gun down.
709
00:35:43,228 --> 00:35:45,185
He's telling the truth,
Walter.
710
00:35:45,186 --> 00:35:47,492
All right, Noah's alive,
711
00:35:47,493 --> 00:35:50,886
and the surgery is
going really well.
712
00:35:50,887 --> 00:35:53,454
Just put the gun down.
713
00:35:53,455 --> 00:35:55,891
All right, let me take you
upstairs to join your wife.
714
00:35:55,892 --> 00:35:58,198
Stop lying to me.
715
00:35:58,199 --> 00:36:02,855
My son is gone,
716
00:36:02,856 --> 00:36:04,683
and I don't know how
I'm gonna live without him.
717
00:36:04,684 --> 00:36:07,774
Walter, I would never
lie to you.
718
00:36:09,906 --> 00:36:11,951
Whoa, whoa. Hey, whoa, whoa.
719
00:36:11,952 --> 00:36:13,822
Easy, okay, Walter? Come on.
720
00:36:13,823 --> 00:36:15,607
You don't understand.
721
00:36:15,608 --> 00:36:17,522
Noah needed lungs, and we were
told to get in line,
722
00:36:17,523 --> 00:36:19,393
so we did,
because that's the system.
723
00:36:19,394 --> 00:36:21,308
And it's supposed
to be fair, right?
724
00:36:21,309 --> 00:36:26,400
So we waited years
while Noah wasted away,
725
00:36:26,401 --> 00:36:29,098
praying for a miracle.
726
00:36:29,099 --> 00:36:32,232
And then one day,
we got the call.
727
00:36:32,233 --> 00:36:35,801
We got the miracle.
728
00:36:35,802 --> 00:36:38,717
Until you cut the line.
729
00:36:38,718 --> 00:36:42,242
I was protecting my child,
same as you.
730
00:36:42,243 --> 00:36:44,418
We're not the same.
731
00:36:44,419 --> 00:36:47,813
I tried to protect my son,
but I don't have the money
732
00:36:47,814 --> 00:36:50,119
and the power like you do.
733
00:36:50,120 --> 00:36:54,602
Walter, listen to me, okay?
734
00:36:54,603 --> 00:36:57,215
Noah is alive.
735
00:36:59,391 --> 00:37:03,959
That's why he's gone
and my daughter is still here.
736
00:37:03,960 --> 00:37:05,657
Walter.
737
00:37:05,658 --> 00:37:08,442
Noah still needs you
to fight for him.
738
00:37:08,443 --> 00:37:11,445
And that's what
I admire about you.
739
00:37:11,446 --> 00:37:14,448
Not every parent would fight
for their child
740
00:37:14,449 --> 00:37:16,058
the way that you do.
741
00:37:16,059 --> 00:37:18,060
And this transplant?
742
00:37:18,061 --> 00:37:20,454
All right, it means that Noah
has more years ahead of him
743
00:37:20,455 --> 00:37:23,414
than he's already lived.
744
00:37:23,415 --> 00:37:26,808
I don't want you
to miss any of that.
745
00:37:26,809 --> 00:37:28,549
So come on.
746
00:37:28,550 --> 00:37:32,684
All right?
Please, put the gun down.
747
00:37:53,401 --> 00:37:56,316
Hey, Mister?
748
00:37:56,317 --> 00:37:59,014
If I don't get the chance,
749
00:37:59,015 --> 00:38:02,670
tell Noah to use those lungs
as much as he can.
750
00:38:02,671 --> 00:38:06,848
I'll tell him, sweetie,
I promise.
751
00:38:06,849 --> 00:38:08,676
Thank you.
752
00:39:04,385 --> 00:39:09,389
Hi.
You might not remember me,
753
00:39:09,390 --> 00:39:12,305
but we met
when I got stuck in a well,
754
00:39:12,306 --> 00:39:15,440
and you cut off my leg.
755
00:39:16,876 --> 00:39:18,006
Nope.
756
00:39:18,007 --> 00:39:20,618
Sorry, not, uh,
not ringing any bells.
757
00:39:20,619 --> 00:39:24,753
Uh, picture me
with more dirt on my face.
758
00:39:27,452 --> 00:39:29,801
Oh, Sadie.
759
00:39:31,934 --> 00:39:34,981
- Hi.
- Hi.
760
00:39:38,767 --> 00:39:40,073
Hey.
761
00:39:43,424 --> 00:39:45,383
We need to talk.
762
00:39:48,821 --> 00:39:52,432
You know, there's something
Maya Angelou once said
763
00:39:52,433 --> 00:39:55,609
that kept ringing in my ear.
764
00:39:55,610 --> 00:39:58,699
"When someone shows you
who they are,
765
00:39:58,700 --> 00:40:02,094
believe it the first time."
766
00:40:02,095 --> 00:40:05,880
I didn't wanna believe
what I felt, but...
767
00:40:05,881 --> 00:40:11,277
Who am I to question Maya?
768
00:40:11,278 --> 00:40:14,585
So today,
769
00:40:14,586 --> 00:40:18,894
I chose to believe
what I already knew to be true.
770
00:40:21,027 --> 00:40:27,902
I'm finding forgiveness harder
as I get older.
771
00:40:27,903 --> 00:40:30,644
It's just too easy.
772
00:40:30,645 --> 00:40:34,561
And yet I feel--
773
00:40:34,562 --> 00:40:38,086
I feel hopeful.
774
00:40:38,087 --> 00:40:41,700
Um, I did almost die.
775
00:40:45,225 --> 00:40:49,795
And yet, here I am, alive.
776
00:40:57,411 --> 00:41:00,066
Mm, don't cry.
777
00:41:03,373 --> 00:41:06,594
You're so pretty.
778
00:41:09,467 --> 00:41:12,033
What's your name?
779
00:41:12,034 --> 00:41:14,036
Sharon.
780
00:41:17,518 --> 00:41:20,389
You're tired, aren't you?
781
00:41:20,390 --> 00:41:25,220
I--could--
782
00:41:25,221 --> 00:41:28,528
I don't--yeah.
783
00:41:28,529 --> 00:41:30,095
It's okay, Bert.
784
00:41:30,096 --> 00:41:31,575
Yeah.
785
00:41:31,576 --> 00:41:33,447
It's okay.
786
00:41:35,318 --> 00:41:37,232
We can just sit.
56334
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