Original subtitles

Here's adventure.

Here's romance.

Here's O. Henry's famous Robin Hood of the Old West,

"The Cisco Kid."

"To be...

"or not to be, that is the question."

The question?

This I do not understand.

Cisco, is he asking me or telling me?

(laughing) Poor Shakespeare, he must be

turning over in his grave.

(laughing) Cisco, ever since I find

that little book about Mr. Shakespeare on the road,

you do nothing but laugh.

(laughing) (man laughing)

Hey, Cisco, you hear what I hear?

That's no coyote.

(laughing continues) Who in the Sam blazes

is doing that?

I don't know, Pancho, but I'm going to find out.

Look after the fire.

Look after him, Pancho.

Any luck, Cisco?

No, Pancho, I lost the trail on the rocks.

What about him?

He's dead.

Look.

The deputy sheriff.

Yeah.

Hey, Pancho, look through his pockets--

maybe there's some papers-- while I have a look in the

saddlebag.

Great Scott.

What's the matter, Cisco?

Take a look.

Cisco, never did I see so much money outside of a bank.

Why do you think they leave it here, Cisco?

I don't know, Pancho.

Maybe we scared them away.

Say, did you find any papers in the deputy's pocket?

No, only this letter addressed to Señor Logan

in Waco Center.

You know where that is?

Yes, I do.

I also know the sheriff there, Tom Brayle.

Come on, let's see what he can tell us about this.

Good digestion wait on appetite.

Mmm, health on both.

(man laughing) Welcome, strangers, welcome.

You are just in time to share in my humble repast, and I am

honored by your company.

I hope that means that you've got enough stew to go around.

I do.

Oh, I'm sorry, excuse me, gentlemen, while I procure

more spoons and plates.

He sure talks funny.

Yeah, like one of those medicine-show fakers I worked

with for a while.

Come, come, gentlemen, 'tis not ambrosia I offer,

but 'tis tasty.

And to a hungry man, even a crust of bread

is a king's banquet.

Looks like mighty tasty stew, Doc.

Well, thank you, sir.

But the name is not Doc.

I am Homer Appleby, formerly of the Tingleton Repertory Company.

But now a purveyor of pots, pans, dishes, knickknacks,

calicos, threads, laces and hundreds of other articles

so coveted by the weaker sex.

You mind if I take a squint into your wagon?

Not at all, sir, not at all.

Tasty?

(laughing) Well, I'll be hanged.

(laughing) (laughing)

Archie!

How dare you snoop into my trunk.

I was just curious.

Look, not a bone in his body.

Stop, you'll hurt him.

Hurt him?

What do you think he is, a human being?

He's just as human as you are.

He is, is he?

Well, watch this, old man.

I'll show you how human he is.

Oh, Archie!

Well...

that was a surprise.

It was smart.

Hmpf.

I'll bet he hasn't got over two dollars on him.

One and six bits.

And we just left a fortune behind.

This won't get us very far.

Maybe not, that wagon will.

We can ride right into Waco Center, take our time about

picking up the plates we printed all that phony money with.

You mean, visit the sheriff's office?

Sure.

You won't mind stealing from the sheriff, will you?

No, but how about you?

That deputy's the only one that knew me and he's dead now.

You douse the fire.

I'll hitch up the horses.

But supposing we meet someone who knew him and his wagon?

We'll take care of that before we hit Waco Center.

As soon as we get the plates, we'll head south of the border

and start printing them up.

That's where we should've set up shop in the first place.

When you get through here, how about tying the horses

to the wagon?

All right.

(chuckling) Cisco, this is sure our day

to find dead hombres, huh?

Pancho, get my canteen on the saddlebags.

This one is still alive.

Don't try to talk.

We'll get you to a doctor.

Hey, Cisco.

You gonna put him up on Señor Logan's horse?

No, Pancho, we'll make an Indian drag.

You cut two poles while I put some dressings on his wounds.

Santos.

I don't believe what I'm seeing.

Children's footprints out here in the wilderness.

My eyes don't believe what they see.

That's strange.

Everything is strange around here.

How is the señor?

Not good.

We're gonna be lucky if we get him to a doctor alive.

I'm afraid he's paralyzed.

Aye, mia.

But, Doc, can't you give me any idea how long he'll

be like this?

I don't know, Sheriff.

He may come out of it in an hour.

He may never come out of it.

We've done just about all we can for him.

He's pretty far gone.

Poor old man, he got shoot in the back, huh?

And you didn't find anything that would identify him, Cisco?

No, Sheriff.

Hmm.

I wonder if he could be Blade Meddick, the man

my deputy was bringing in.

Not bad, not bad at all.

(can clanking) What in the blazes was that?

Just an empty paint can.

You're sure jumpy.

You'd be too.

I don't see any sense in learning this fool stuff.

We gotta do it.

What if we're tricked into giving a show.

They'll walk out on us.

Ah, quit your crabbing.

Come on, let's say the words again.

Oh, it won't work, Blade.

We sold our horses to get some cash.

Now we've got it.

Let's get over the border.

And leave those plates behind?

All right, but remember, I'm not sitting on your knees

this time.

You gotta do it.

They'll spot us right away as a couple of phonies unless we

do some practicing, now come on.

All right.

(mumbling) Come on, get up here.

(muttering) Come on, come on.

Well, well, Mr. Principle, how are you this morning?

Mighty pert, Professor.

But my name ain't Principle.

I'm Blackbeard Bret Onapasos.

Oh, a westerner?

A dyed-in-the-wool one.

Fact is, I've been around here so long, I know every lizard

and coyote by his first name.

(chuckling) When these counterfeit bills

began to show up around here, Logan and I went to work.

We got a tip that led us up to a shack in the hills.

Somebody must have tipped off the crooks or they spotted us

coming in, because they skipped out with all the bills

before we got there.

These look like the real stuff to me.

How you know it's counterfeit, Mr. Sherriff?

Well, here, I'll show you.

Because of the color of this seal and the treasurer's name,

Debecker, is misspelled.

Oh, I can't stay here no longer to look at that money.

To think all that beautiful dinero is just imitations.

Go on, Sheriff.

Well, we smashed the press and grabbed the plates,

and Logan took the trail after the crooks.

Things are really beginning to add up.

Last night, I got this telegram from him.

"Captured Blade Meddick "and counterfeit cash.

"Bringing both to Waco Center "tomorrow.

"Confederate got away, "didn't even spot him.

Logan."

Now here's how I got this figured.

I figure this confederate must've trailed him.

Then rode on around him and set up the ambush.

Then this paralyzed man could be Blade Meddick or his partner.

For all we know, they might have had a falling out.

Yeah, could be.

But unless this wounded man recovers enough to talk,

we'll never know.

I don't even have a picture or a description of

either one of them.

There must be a way to find out.

Cisco, there's something wonderful I just happen.

I mean, I just find it out, Cisco, and if you

let me in on it, maybe it would be big stepping rocks

for me to be famous!

What are you talking about, Pancho?

Come, I show you, come on.

Señor Zagon, this is Cisco Kid.

Very glad to know you.

This is an unexpected pleasure, Cisco.

I've heard a great deal about you and your exploits.

I'm sorry, I cannot return the compliment.

Oh, I wouldn't believe you if you did.

The Zagon Home Town Repertory Company isn't in business yet.

No, but it's gonna be in business pretty soon,

though, yeah?

Well, I hadn't planned on it.

You mean, a show wagon without a show?

Sure, I have a show, but-- And you're gonna need

more actor people, eh?

And here it is.

"The evil that men live do "after them, the good is oft

interrupted in the bones."

Shakespeare.

There's one act you can count on.

I'll need more than that.

Don't worry, as soon as the news gets around,

you'll have plenty of actors.

You gonna give a show, eh?

Uh, yeah, I guess so.

In that case, I have lots to do.

I'll have to rustle up some more acts.

So if you'll excuse me.

Then-- then-- then-- then I'm gonna be an actor, eh?

Well, I can't promise you'll be an actor,

but you can be in the show.

What's eating you?

The way you let Cisco back you into a corner.

Well, I couldn't help myself.

Besides, it'll bring all the townspeople into one spot

while we operate.

You didn't have to promise his pal a part in the show.

What else could I do?

But don't worry, you heard him.

He's worse than we are.

Yeah.

"Friends, Romans, "countrymen,

lend me your ears."

That's silly, how can anybody lend me their ears?

All set?

Yeah, Pancho's talked Cisco and the sheriff into coming to

Town Hall this afternoon to watch him rehearse in costume.

That'll give us our chance.

(laughing) That's a clever act you have.

That dummy looks almost real.

Well, he's heavy enough to be real.

All right, Pancho, you're next.

Oh, me?

"But, soft!

"what light through yonder "window breaks?

"It is the east, "and Juliet is the sun.

"Arise, fair sun, "and kill the

"envious moon, "who is already sick and pale

with 'griefing.'" (laughing)

(laughing) ... that birds would sing...

Look, Cisco, I can't take any more of this.

I'll see you over at the office.

All right, Sheriff.

(laughing) (laughing)

(laughing) (laughing continues)

How about that Cisco, huh?

Hey, the counterfeit cash with plates are gone.

What?

Meddick or some of his gang are in town again.

I got deputies all over the place looking for them.

Are you sure it's Meddick this time?

No, no, it couldn't have been Meddick this time.

He's a full-grown man.

And the footprints that are on that safe were those of a child.

Like the kind we find in the woods, Cisco?

That's right.

Pancho, you run to the sheriff's office and have a look at them.

Sí.

Come on, Sheriff.

Sometimes I think I ought to go back to waiting on tables.

With your talent?

Well, you and the dummy did a wonderful performance.

I'm glad you liked it.

Say, Zagon, I had a very strange feeling while I was

watching your act.

Like what?

Like that dummy of yours was really alive.

That's quite a compliment.

Perhaps I can prove he isn't.

(chuckling) You win.

How about making him talk now?

Have a heart, Cisco, I'm tired.

Oh, just a few words.

Sorry.

You come to tonight's show and you'll hear him talk plenty.

Madre mia!

Cisco, who-- what happened?

I don't know.

I wish I knew.

I was leaning against this trunk and all of a sudden everything

went black.

Oh, Cisco, this is what hit you.

It must have fallen from the rafters.

It's got a kick like a mule.

You might have concussion.

You better have the doctor look at it.

Doctor Waite is too busy right now to bother with

a bump on the head.

Cisco, all he is doing is waiting for the shut-up crook we

pick up in the wood to become un-paralyzed and he should talk.

We don't know the man is a crook.

Cisco, if he wasn't mixed up with those men who have that

counterfeit money, I'm a monkey's uncle.

We better go and see if he's come to.

Come on.

Psst, psst.

What's the matter with you, are you out of your mind,

socking Cisco?

I couldn't help myself.

I didn't want him to spot the money or the plates.

Never mind about that.

How about that old geezer we thought was dead?

That's right.

If he opens his mouth, we're sunk.

Don't worry, he won't.

Why not?

I'll see to it.

He seems to have responded nicely to our treatment

for the bullet wound.

But nothing we've been able to do will wake him up.

He just keeps on sleeping.

Oh, sleep so gently...

Nature's sweet music.

How have I hurt thee?

That thou no more will weigh down my eyelids

and steep my senses into forgetfulness?

Where's the sheriff?

I've got to see the sheriff.

The big one shot me and left me for dead.

Took my horse and wagon and Archie.

The little one hurt Archie.

And laughed and laughed.

Where's Archie?

Poor Archie.

Archie?

Yes.

Archie's my little dummy.

Homer Appleby and Archie.

The world's greatest ventriloquist act.

Those little footprints.

Of course.

That must be the answer.

Answer to what, Cisco?

You all two skips behind me.

Pancho, you stay here and keep a close watch on him.

If what I suspect is true, he's definitely marked

for murder.

(clattering) Santo, somebody's outside.

(sneezing) Hey, the box is moving.

No, maybe there's a dog or a cat in that.

I wouldn't wanna hurt them.

I'll go outside and see.

Hey, wait!

(gunshot firing) This little boy

wants to shoot at me!

I would-- Oh, it's you, Cisco.

Where you come from?

Did you see a-- see a little boy?

That's not a boy, Pancho.

That's a midget.

A midget?

If you're coming with me, you'd better hurry.

Yee-yo!

Look, there's some horses!

Get, Blade!

Get our horses.

(gunshots firing) Hit that one,

don't hit the little fellow.

Ow!

Ow, ow!

I'll teach little boys how to sit on big laps.

Ow, ow!

Cisco, all is well that ends good, no?

Oh, Pancho.

Oh, Cisco!

(laughing) Goodbye, amigos!

See you soon!

Ha!