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1
00:00:01,302 --> 00:00:02,770
On last week's episode...
2
00:00:03,771 --> 00:00:04,705
Where are you going?
3
00:00:04,772 --> 00:00:06,407
To tell Burton I love him!
4
00:00:06,474 --> 00:00:09,877
I have to tell you something,
and it's the kind of something
5
00:00:09,943 --> 00:00:11,545
that should only be said
in person...
6
00:00:11,612 --> 00:00:14,682
or on a giant screen
at a baseball game.
7
00:00:16,350 --> 00:00:17,718
I...
8
00:00:19,253 --> 00:00:21,389
...don't think
I can see you anymore.
9
00:00:24,958 --> 00:00:27,295
Wow, I'm... so glad
you didn't put that
10
00:00:27,361 --> 00:00:29,697
on a giant screen
at a baseball game.
11
00:00:42,009 --> 00:00:43,477
Gotcha!
( screams )
12
00:00:43,544 --> 00:00:44,912
Oh, sorry, honey,
don't be scared.
13
00:00:44,978 --> 00:00:45,979
It's just Mommy.
14
00:00:46,046 --> 00:00:48,782
Don't do that.
Okay, I won't.
15
00:00:48,849 --> 00:00:50,418
Sorry. Sorry, sweetie.
16
00:00:50,484 --> 00:00:51,719
How was your day? Okay?
17
00:00:51,785 --> 00:00:53,221
Great.
18
00:00:53,287 --> 00:00:56,090
I saw a second-grader throw up
lasagna in the bathroom.
19
00:00:56,157 --> 00:00:59,026
Ah, okay. What else?
20
00:00:59,093 --> 00:01:00,828
Maybe applesauce.
21
00:01:00,894 --> 00:01:02,430
( sighs )
22
00:01:02,496 --> 00:01:05,733
Well, this school's definitely
worth the second mortgage.
23
00:01:07,101 --> 00:01:08,969
And it's my night
to take home Marvin.
24
00:01:09,036 --> 00:01:11,772
The janitor?
25
00:01:11,839 --> 00:01:13,073
No, the class rat.
26
00:01:13,141 --> 00:01:14,675
We named him after the janitor.
27
00:01:14,742 --> 00:01:17,445
Oh. Could we take home
the janitor?
28
00:01:17,511 --> 00:01:22,015
I mean, the pellets are bigger,
but he cleans up after himself.
29
00:01:22,082 --> 00:01:23,817
That's a good
one, right?
30
00:01:23,884 --> 00:01:25,119
Yeah.
31
00:01:26,019 --> 00:01:27,755
Hey, buddy.
32
00:01:27,821 --> 00:01:29,557
Hi, Dad. Hey, New Christine.
33
00:01:29,623 --> 00:01:30,391
Hey.
34
00:01:30,458 --> 00:01:33,093
It's funny every time.
35
00:01:33,161 --> 00:01:34,662
What are you guys doing here?
36
00:01:34,728 --> 00:01:35,663
Picking up Ritchie.
37
00:01:35,729 --> 00:01:37,265
We switched
nights, remember?
38
00:01:37,331 --> 00:01:39,032
You were going to go see
some play or something.
39
00:01:39,099 --> 00:01:40,434
Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
40
00:01:40,501 --> 00:01:42,102
I was going to go see
that play with Burton.
41
00:01:42,170 --> 00:01:43,604
We got the tickets
when we were together,
42
00:01:43,671 --> 00:01:47,275
but we're not together anymore,
so... no play.
43
00:01:47,341 --> 00:01:49,777
I mean, they're probably
not going to cancel the play
44
00:01:49,843 --> 00:01:51,779
just because we broke up, but...
45
00:01:51,845 --> 00:01:53,281
Anyway, I-I-I'll take
Ritchie tonight,
46
00:01:53,347 --> 00:01:54,648
and then you can take him
tomorrow.
47
00:01:54,715 --> 00:01:55,649
I can't.
Why?
48
00:01:55,716 --> 00:01:57,285
I'm going out
of town tomorrow,
49
00:01:57,351 --> 00:01:59,119
and we already have movie
tickets for tonight.
50
00:01:59,187 --> 00:02:00,954
Plus, I already gave you
an extra day this week
51
00:02:01,021 --> 00:02:02,623
so you could take him
to that thing on ice.
52
00:02:02,690 --> 00:02:04,958
I love things on ice.
53
00:02:05,025 --> 00:02:07,861
No, no, no, the-the thing
on ice is next week.
54
00:02:07,928 --> 00:02:08,996
This is next week.
55
00:02:09,062 --> 00:02:09,997
( groans )
56
00:02:10,063 --> 00:02:11,265
We missed the thing on ice.
57
00:02:11,332 --> 00:02:12,466
So what am I doing?
58
00:02:12,533 --> 00:02:13,634
Uh, all right,
your dad's right.
59
00:02:13,701 --> 00:02:15,102
You know what?
60
00:02:15,169 --> 00:02:16,704
Let's just stick to the plan:
You go with Daddy tonight,
61
00:02:16,770 --> 00:02:18,172
and I'll figure out
something else to do.
62
00:02:18,239 --> 00:02:19,540
Go get your backpack,
sweetie pie.
63
00:02:19,607 --> 00:02:20,574
Okay.
64
00:02:20,641 --> 00:02:21,842
Oh, I hate to think
of you all alone.
65
00:02:21,909 --> 00:02:23,043
Why don't you come
with us?
66
00:02:23,110 --> 00:02:24,445
We're going to go see
that new movie.
67
00:02:24,512 --> 00:02:27,114
It's with Selma Blair...
or Salma Hayek.
68
00:02:27,181 --> 00:02:30,484
Which one is married
to Michael Douglas?
69
00:02:32,420 --> 00:02:33,621
Yeah, yeah, come with us.
70
00:02:33,687 --> 00:02:34,955
You just broke
up with Burton.
71
00:02:35,022 --> 00:02:35,956
You don't want
to be alone.
72
00:02:36,023 --> 00:02:37,291
Oh, no, you guys, please.
73
00:02:37,358 --> 00:02:38,926
I was alone a long time
before Burton;
74
00:02:38,992 --> 00:02:42,062
I'm going to be alone
a long time after Burton.
75
00:02:42,129 --> 00:02:44,232
Sad.
76
00:02:44,298 --> 00:02:45,999
No, it's not sad. It's great.
77
00:02:46,066 --> 00:02:47,134
I'm good alone, really.
78
00:02:47,201 --> 00:02:48,436
I mean, in fact, in high school,
79
00:02:48,502 --> 00:02:50,271
I was voted
"most likely to be alone,"
80
00:02:50,338 --> 00:02:53,741
and it was a big school.
81
00:02:54,808 --> 00:02:56,410
Really sad.
82
00:02:56,477 --> 00:02:58,111
Oh, it's fine.
Okay, sweetie.
83
00:02:58,178 --> 00:02:59,780
You got everything?
All right, give me kiss.
84
00:02:59,847 --> 00:03:01,915
See you later, alligator.
85
00:03:01,982 --> 00:03:02,916
In a while, crocodile.
86
00:03:02,983 --> 00:03:06,153
Okay. Bye.
87
00:03:06,220 --> 00:03:09,323
Man, that was
tough to watch.
88
00:03:09,390 --> 00:03:11,625
Seeing your kid
get hauled away
89
00:03:11,692 --> 00:03:14,728
by your ex and his
new, young lover.
90
00:03:14,795 --> 00:03:15,929
I know what that's like.
91
00:03:15,996 --> 00:03:19,600
Been there, done that,
got the tee shirt.
92
00:03:21,402 --> 00:03:23,271
Hi, Stan.
No, it's not like that at all.
93
00:03:23,337 --> 00:03:25,105
We just got our wires crossed,
that's all.
94
00:03:25,172 --> 00:03:26,206
Oh, hello,
Mrs. Campbell.
95
00:03:26,274 --> 00:03:27,608
Are you waiting for me?
96
00:03:27,675 --> 00:03:30,110
Oh, no, she just had
a mix-up with her kid,
97
00:03:30,177 --> 00:03:31,279
but she's okay now.
98
00:03:31,345 --> 00:03:32,946
I'm taking care of her.
99
00:03:33,013 --> 00:03:35,816
We had a thing.
100
00:03:35,883 --> 00:03:37,885
Yes, I, uh, think
I heard something about that.
101
00:03:37,951 --> 00:03:39,119
Oh, well, did you hear
102
00:03:39,186 --> 00:03:41,355
she got dumped by
her rebound guy?
103
00:03:41,422 --> 00:03:42,990
No, I didn't hear that.
104
00:03:43,056 --> 00:03:44,792
No, no, he wasn't
my rebound guy,
105
00:03:44,858 --> 00:03:45,859
and I broke up with him.
106
00:03:45,926 --> 00:03:47,495
And we, uh, we didn't
107
00:03:47,561 --> 00:03:49,096
have a thing...
I don't really need
an explanation.
108
00:03:49,162 --> 00:03:52,400
I'm just going to clear out
and let you two talk.
109
00:03:52,466 --> 00:03:54,635
Good luck to you, Mrs. Campbell.
110
00:03:57,305 --> 00:03:58,939
Thank you.
111
00:03:59,006 --> 00:04:00,274
Thank you, Mrs. Belt.
112
00:04:00,341 --> 00:04:01,742
Please, Stan,
113
00:04:01,809 --> 00:04:05,045
please don't keep telling people
about our thing.
114
00:04:05,112 --> 00:04:07,448
I know breakups
are hard.
115
00:04:07,515 --> 00:04:09,450
I could write
a book about it.
116
00:04:09,517 --> 00:04:11,952
In fact, I did.
117
00:04:12,019 --> 00:04:14,455
Just can't find a
publisher, though.
118
00:04:14,522 --> 00:04:16,890
You're in it.
You come off okay.
119
00:04:16,957 --> 00:04:18,626
Okay. I've got to go.
120
00:04:18,692 --> 00:04:20,528
I-I-I'll-I'll see you, Stan.
121
00:04:20,594 --> 00:04:21,662
Well, wait, wait.
122
00:04:21,729 --> 00:04:23,063
Uh, I do want
you to know
123
00:04:23,130 --> 00:04:26,266
that I appreciate what
a tough time this is,
124
00:04:26,334 --> 00:04:28,536
and, you know,
if the loneliness
ever gets too much,
125
00:04:28,602 --> 00:04:29,937
and you start
feeling sad,
126
00:04:30,003 --> 00:04:33,341
just remember I got big
shoulders to cry on.
127
00:04:33,407 --> 00:04:36,276
Well, Stan,
let me tell you something, okay?
128
00:04:36,344 --> 00:04:38,278
There is absolutely nothing sad
129
00:04:38,346 --> 00:04:40,280
about the evening
I have ahead of me.
130
00:04:40,348 --> 00:04:41,849
Mrs. Campbell?
Yes.
131
00:04:41,915 --> 00:04:44,284
Don't forget your rat.
132
00:04:44,352 --> 00:04:46,620
No, no, no,
we're not together anymore.
133
00:04:46,687 --> 00:04:47,455
Oh, the rat!
134
00:04:47,521 --> 00:04:49,623
Marvin. Yes.
135
00:05:00,200 --> 00:05:02,970
Okay, Marvin.
136
00:05:03,036 --> 00:05:05,305
Well, I wish I could say
you were the first rat
137
00:05:05,373 --> 00:05:08,809
I brought home
to spend the night...
138
00:05:08,876 --> 00:05:10,644
but if you play
your cards right,
139
00:05:10,711 --> 00:05:15,716
you might be the first rat
to make it till morning.
140
00:05:15,783 --> 00:05:17,351
Hello.
141
00:05:18,386 --> 00:05:19,653
God, Matthew!
142
00:05:19,720 --> 00:05:22,356
Why didn't you tell me
you had company?
143
00:05:22,423 --> 00:05:26,360
God, I might have done
something embarrassing.
144
00:05:26,427 --> 00:05:29,897
Yeah, seducing a
rodent doesn't qualify.
145
00:05:29,963 --> 00:05:34,234
I wasn't seducing him.
I was just breaking the ice.
146
00:05:34,301 --> 00:05:36,036
This is my
sister Christine.
147
00:05:36,103 --> 00:05:37,137
Hi.
148
00:05:37,204 --> 00:05:38,138
Hi.
I'm Natalie.
149
00:05:38,205 --> 00:05:39,407
Oh.
150
00:05:39,473 --> 00:05:42,142
Matthew's told me
so much about you.
151
00:05:42,209 --> 00:05:45,646
I'm sorry about your breakup,
but you know what?
152
00:05:45,713 --> 00:05:48,916
You can't make someone love you.
153
00:05:52,720 --> 00:05:56,189
What? No, no, no,
he loved me.
154
00:05:56,256 --> 00:05:57,525
I-I-I'm the one
that didn't love...
155
00:05:57,591 --> 00:06:00,360
Matthew, what are
you doing
156
00:06:00,428 --> 00:06:03,163
telling strangers
personal things about my life?
157
00:06:03,230 --> 00:06:04,965
Especially if you're not going
to get it right.
158
00:06:05,032 --> 00:06:06,166
I broke up with him.
159
00:06:06,233 --> 00:06:08,301
Yeah, tell it
to the rat.
160
00:06:08,368 --> 00:06:09,503
Hey, where's Ritchie?
161
00:06:09,570 --> 00:06:10,971
He's with Richard.
162
00:06:11,038 --> 00:06:14,307
We got our wires crossed.
I'm all alone tonight.
163
00:06:14,374 --> 00:06:15,308
Alone? Uh-oh.
164
00:06:15,375 --> 00:06:17,811
What? No, it's not "uh-oh."
165
00:06:17,878 --> 00:06:19,179
I can be alone.
166
00:06:19,246 --> 00:06:20,481
I've never been alone.
167
00:06:20,548 --> 00:06:22,483
I've been with someone
since the second grade.
168
00:06:22,550 --> 00:06:24,552
I would die
if I was ever alone.
169
00:06:27,020 --> 00:06:28,255
Where are you going?
170
00:06:28,321 --> 00:06:30,090
To the fridge.
171
00:06:30,157 --> 00:06:33,026
Are you coming back?
172
00:06:34,127 --> 00:06:37,230
I hope so.
173
00:06:37,297 --> 00:06:38,398
So, are you going
to be okay?
174
00:06:38,466 --> 00:06:39,800
Yeah, of course
I'm going to be okay.
175
00:06:39,867 --> 00:06:41,334
Why? What do you think
I'm going to do?
176
00:06:41,401 --> 00:06:43,804
I don't know, fall apart,
drink yourself to sleep,
177
00:06:43,871 --> 00:06:46,339
make out with a
crossing guard.
178
00:06:46,406 --> 00:06:48,476
Okay, first of all,
Matthew,
179
00:06:48,542 --> 00:06:49,743
that was in high school.
180
00:06:50,444 --> 00:06:51,612
And second of all,
181
00:06:51,679 --> 00:06:53,481
Carl was not
just a crossing guard.
182
00:06:53,547 --> 00:06:56,917
He was also a bartender.
183
00:06:56,984 --> 00:07:00,087
Which made his DUI
all the more ironic.
184
00:07:01,354 --> 00:07:02,590
Why'd he break up
with you again?
185
00:07:02,656 --> 00:07:04,958
I broke up with him.
186
00:07:05,025 --> 00:07:07,528
Listen, I handle these things
so much better now.
187
00:07:07,595 --> 00:07:08,662
I really do.
188
00:07:08,729 --> 00:07:09,797
I mean, the truth is,
189
00:07:09,863 --> 00:07:11,499
I look forward to being alone.
190
00:07:11,565 --> 00:07:14,668
I can't even remember the last
time I had this house to myself.
191
00:07:14,735 --> 00:07:15,769
Uh-oh.
192
00:07:15,836 --> 00:07:17,170
( scoffs ):
What's this "uh-oh"?
193
00:07:17,237 --> 00:07:19,306
No, we didn't think
you'd be here tonight.
194
00:07:19,372 --> 00:07:21,475
We were going to make dinner,
but I can do it in my room.
195
00:07:21,542 --> 00:07:26,379
Just steam some vegetables
with an iron.
196
00:07:26,446 --> 00:07:29,483
Uh, no, no, no, no, no,
that's okay.
197
00:07:29,550 --> 00:07:31,184
You-you can make your dinner.
198
00:07:31,251 --> 00:07:32,720
I'll just, uh, go out.
Where?
199
00:07:32,786 --> 00:07:34,021
I don't know, anywhere.
200
00:07:34,087 --> 00:07:36,990
That's what's so great
about America.
201
00:07:37,057 --> 00:07:39,760
You're going to do
that all by yourself?
202
00:07:39,827 --> 00:07:41,495
Yep. Just me, myself and I.
203
00:07:41,562 --> 00:07:42,830
And who knows?
204
00:07:42,896 --> 00:07:44,498
If myself has
a couple of drinks,
205
00:07:44,565 --> 00:07:46,700
me might just get lucky.
206
00:07:52,573 --> 00:07:55,308
Keep moving, Ritchie.
There's three of us.
207
00:07:55,375 --> 00:07:57,144
One more, bud.
208
00:08:01,882 --> 00:08:03,517
Okay, don't touch the
floor; it's dirty.
209
00:08:03,584 --> 00:08:05,519
No, no, those aren't
your Milk Duds.
210
00:08:05,586 --> 00:08:06,620
Your jacket's falling.
211
00:08:06,687 --> 00:08:07,988
No, now move
your drink.
212
00:08:08,055 --> 00:08:09,022
It's going to spill.
213
00:08:09,089 --> 00:08:10,490
Keep your shoes on.
214
00:08:10,558 --> 00:08:12,492
This is fun, huh?
215
00:08:12,560 --> 00:08:14,161
I'm excited about this.
216
00:08:14,227 --> 00:08:15,996
I love movies
with talking penguins.
217
00:08:16,063 --> 00:08:17,497
But I hate it
when they sing.
218
00:08:17,565 --> 00:08:19,166
It seems so fake.
219
00:08:20,668 --> 00:08:22,670
I'm worried
about Christine.
220
00:08:22,736 --> 00:08:24,204
She looked a little lost
when we left her.
221
00:08:24,271 --> 00:08:25,539
She's fine.
222
00:08:25,606 --> 00:08:27,641
She's been through worse
things than a breakup.
223
00:08:27,708 --> 00:08:29,409
Look at the size
of Ritchie's head.
224
00:08:29,476 --> 00:08:31,478
They let her
go through 60
hours of labor
225
00:08:31,545 --> 00:08:33,146
before doing
her C-section.
226
00:08:47,494 --> 00:08:49,429
Oh, um, excuse me.
227
00:08:49,496 --> 00:08:51,064
Hi. Oh, hi, Peter.
228
00:08:51,131 --> 00:08:52,600
Hi. Can you help me?
229
00:08:52,666 --> 00:08:53,834
Mrs. Campbell!
230
00:08:53,901 --> 00:08:56,670
It's so nice
to see you again.
231
00:08:56,737 --> 00:08:58,939
Will Mr. Shaefer
be joining you?
232
00:08:59,006 --> 00:09:00,540
Uh, no.
233
00:09:00,608 --> 00:09:01,975
No, he won't.
234
00:09:02,042 --> 00:09:04,612
Actually, we're...
we're not together anymore.
235
00:09:04,678 --> 00:09:07,314
( gasps ):
Oh, no!
236
00:09:07,380 --> 00:09:10,150
Oh, I am sorry!
237
00:09:10,217 --> 00:09:13,253
I can't believe
he broke up with you.
238
00:09:13,320 --> 00:09:16,556
What? Oh, no, no,
he didn't, he didn't.
239
00:09:16,624 --> 00:09:18,225
I broke up with him.
240
00:09:18,291 --> 00:09:21,762
Yeah. I wonder why you would
assume that he broke up with me?
241
00:09:21,829 --> 00:09:25,065
Oh, I don't know,
just 'cause he's so...
242
00:09:25,132 --> 00:09:27,500
and you're so...
243
00:09:27,567 --> 00:09:30,570
Well, don't you worry.
244
00:09:30,638 --> 00:09:32,405
I'm going
to take care of you.
245
00:09:32,472 --> 00:09:34,274
You and I will make
a night of it.
246
00:09:34,341 --> 00:09:36,576
Oh, well, that is
really not necessary.
247
00:09:36,644 --> 00:09:37,878
Well...
No, it's not,
248
00:09:37,945 --> 00:09:39,212
because, you
know, as I said,
249
00:09:39,279 --> 00:09:41,815
I-I broke up with him.
250
00:09:41,882 --> 00:09:43,717
Right. You did say that.
251
00:09:43,784 --> 00:09:46,720
Anyway, um,
let me get you a table
252
00:09:46,787 --> 00:09:48,388
where you'll
be comfortable.
253
00:09:48,455 --> 00:09:50,490
Oh. I don't have
anything small,
254
00:09:50,557 --> 00:09:51,625
but you have to sit
in my section.
255
00:09:51,692 --> 00:09:52,626
Follow me.
256
00:09:52,693 --> 00:09:54,895
Okay.
257
00:10:02,235 --> 00:10:03,003
Wow.
258
00:10:03,070 --> 00:10:05,072
That's a big
table, isn't it?
259
00:10:05,138 --> 00:10:08,742
God, that table's so big,
it has its own area code.
260
00:10:08,809 --> 00:10:12,079
You need a slingshot
just to pass the salt.
261
00:10:12,145 --> 00:10:13,647
You could land an
F-14 on this baby.
262
00:10:13,714 --> 00:10:15,215
That is one big table,
263
00:10:15,282 --> 00:10:16,884
I'm going to tell
you that right now...
Shh...
264
00:10:16,950 --> 00:10:19,586
Shh, shh, shh, shh.
I know; it hurts.
265
00:10:19,653 --> 00:10:21,221
No. Oh, no,
no, it doesn't.
266
00:10:21,288 --> 00:10:22,723
No, no, no,
those were jokes.
267
00:10:22,790 --> 00:10:24,057
Jokes, jokes.
268
00:10:24,124 --> 00:10:26,093
I'm just trying to
be funny, you know?
269
00:10:26,159 --> 00:10:27,761
Tears of a clown.
270
00:10:28,829 --> 00:10:30,898
I'll get the wine started.
271
00:10:30,964 --> 00:10:32,733
Okay.
272
00:10:32,800 --> 00:10:33,901
( sighs )
273
00:10:33,967 --> 00:10:36,837
What to order, what to...?
274
00:10:36,904 --> 00:10:39,239
Oh, uh, that looks good.
275
00:10:39,306 --> 00:10:40,407
What-what is that?
276
00:10:40,473 --> 00:10:41,541
Oh.
277
00:10:41,608 --> 00:10:43,610
It's a rigatoni
with a lamb ragout.
278
00:10:43,677 --> 00:10:45,879
Oh, lamb? Ew, gross.
I hate lamb.
279
00:11:02,395 --> 00:11:05,365
( exhales deeply )
280
00:11:09,803 --> 00:11:12,672
Boy, now that's
a big table, isn't it?
281
00:11:12,740 --> 00:11:14,574
You know it's big
282
00:11:14,641 --> 00:11:16,744
when you get back to your seat,
and your bread's a day old.
283
00:11:16,810 --> 00:11:18,779
Am I right?
284
00:11:19,679 --> 00:11:22,415
So, where
you folks from?
285
00:11:28,288 --> 00:11:29,723
Damn it.
286
00:11:29,790 --> 00:11:32,692
I know. I'm lost, too.
287
00:11:32,760 --> 00:11:34,061
No, you got me thinking
about Christine,
288
00:11:34,127 --> 00:11:36,296
and now I feel bad
that we left her alone.
289
00:11:36,363 --> 00:11:38,665
Breakups hurt.
There's no way around it.
290
00:11:38,732 --> 00:11:40,467
They were only going
out for two months.
291
00:11:40,533 --> 00:11:41,902
It's still a loss.
292
00:11:41,969 --> 00:11:43,070
I mean, even though
I was the one
293
00:11:43,136 --> 00:11:44,571
that broke up
with my last boyfriend,
294
00:11:44,637 --> 00:11:45,739
it still hurt.
295
00:11:45,806 --> 00:11:48,175
It still does.
But I had to do it.
296
00:11:48,241 --> 00:11:49,609
You can't just stay
with someone
297
00:11:49,676 --> 00:11:52,279
because the sex
is fantastic.
298
00:11:52,345 --> 00:11:53,747
That's a good story.
299
00:11:53,814 --> 00:11:55,715
I'm feeling better.
Thank you.
300
00:11:55,783 --> 00:11:56,817
You know what I mean.
301
00:11:56,884 --> 00:11:58,051
I'm not looking
for that anymore.
302
00:11:58,118 --> 00:11:59,787
I'm looking
for what we have.
303
00:11:59,853 --> 00:12:02,722
Like a brother/
sister thing.
304
00:12:02,790 --> 00:12:04,124
Come on, don't pout.
305
00:12:04,191 --> 00:12:05,525
You know how I feel
about you.
306
00:12:05,592 --> 00:12:06,994
We're incredibly lucky.
307
00:12:07,060 --> 00:12:09,129
I mean, some people go
through their whole lives alone,
308
00:12:09,196 --> 00:12:10,964
just rattling
around their empty houses,
309
00:12:11,031 --> 00:12:12,665
talking to their pets
310
00:12:12,732 --> 00:12:15,035
and complaining
about the president.
311
00:12:15,102 --> 00:12:18,471
Okay, I'm going
to call Christine.
312
00:12:21,541 --> 00:12:23,476
Darn it.
313
00:12:23,543 --> 00:12:24,978
I know. I'm lost, too.
314
00:12:25,045 --> 00:12:27,881
All the penguins look alike.
315
00:12:31,051 --> 00:12:32,953
So he wound up moving
in with his mother,
316
00:12:33,020 --> 00:12:35,455
and, uh, eventually,
he lost his mind...
317
00:12:35,522 --> 00:12:37,457
( laughing )
318
00:12:41,694 --> 00:12:42,930
What are you laughing at?
319
00:12:42,996 --> 00:12:44,998
I'm sorry.
I couldn't help overhearing.
320
00:12:45,065 --> 00:12:49,302
I have a mother, too,
and she drives me in-sane,
321
00:12:49,369 --> 00:12:51,839
so when you said
that he moved in with her
322
00:12:51,905 --> 00:12:56,743
and he lost his mind,
I can totally relate.
323
00:12:56,810 --> 00:12:59,813
He said he
lost his eyes.
324
00:12:59,880 --> 00:13:01,915
He's blind.
325
00:13:02,816 --> 00:13:05,418
Oh. He lost his eyes?
326
00:13:05,485 --> 00:13:09,389
His actual eyes?
327
00:13:09,456 --> 00:13:10,390
How?
328
00:13:11,524 --> 00:13:14,094
We're not talking to you.
329
00:13:19,266 --> 00:13:21,134
Geez.
330
00:13:21,201 --> 00:13:24,071
Didn't know
you owned the restaurant.
331
00:13:25,005 --> 00:13:27,807
This one's on me.
332
00:13:27,875 --> 00:13:29,642
Oh, thank you, Peter.
333
00:13:29,709 --> 00:13:31,244
That's very generous.
334
00:13:31,311 --> 00:13:33,780
( whimpering sigh )
335
00:13:33,847 --> 00:13:34,915
What?
336
00:13:34,982 --> 00:13:37,150
I just can't...
337
00:13:37,217 --> 00:13:39,953
Gosh, you seemed
so good together.
338
00:13:40,020 --> 00:13:43,991
Oh, well, you know,
things happen.
339
00:13:44,057 --> 00:13:47,928
But he was so funny,
and handsome, and smart...
340
00:13:47,995 --> 00:13:49,296
successful.
341
00:13:49,362 --> 00:13:52,465
What exactly was it about him
you didn't like?
342
00:13:52,532 --> 00:13:56,904
Uh, he... he was...
343
00:13:56,970 --> 00:14:00,974
It was... uh...
344
00:14:01,041 --> 00:14:04,277
I... I don't know.
345
00:14:04,344 --> 00:14:07,580
Well... we all make mistakes.
346
00:14:07,647 --> 00:14:11,451
( phone rings the tune
of "Buffalo Gals" )
347
00:14:11,518 --> 00:14:13,186
Oh, sorry, my...
348
00:14:13,253 --> 00:14:15,788
my kid always changes the ring,
and, uh...
349
00:14:15,855 --> 00:14:17,457
I don't, uh...
350
00:14:17,524 --> 00:14:19,960
It's a new phone, and I'm not
really sure where the thing...
351
00:14:20,027 --> 00:14:21,929
Are you familiar
with this model?
352
00:14:21,995 --> 00:14:24,431
You know where the...
353
00:14:24,497 --> 00:14:26,299
off-- I mean, the on...?
354
00:14:26,366 --> 00:14:27,968
But... oh, wait, oh, no, no,
I think I have it.
355
00:14:28,035 --> 00:14:28,969
This is... Yeah, never mind.
356
00:14:29,036 --> 00:14:30,803
I-I got it. Hello?
357
00:14:30,870 --> 00:14:31,972
RICHARD:
Christine?
358
00:14:32,039 --> 00:14:34,341
Oh, Burton!
359
00:14:34,407 --> 00:14:36,476
Oh, hi! My gosh!
360
00:14:36,543 --> 00:14:40,013
I was going to call you,
but then I thought I shouldn't.
361
00:14:40,080 --> 00:14:42,983
Are you okay?
I'm so happy to hear from you.
362
00:14:43,050 --> 00:14:44,918
Oh, hi, Burton.
363
00:14:44,985 --> 00:14:47,154
It's Richard.
364
00:14:47,220 --> 00:14:50,657
Oh. Oh, yeah, yeah.
365
00:14:50,723 --> 00:14:52,492
I-I know it's Richard.
366
00:14:52,559 --> 00:14:54,294
But you said "Burton."
367
00:14:55,862 --> 00:14:58,498
Well, yes, because...
368
00:14:58,565 --> 00:15:02,302
Richard Burton...
369
00:15:02,369 --> 00:15:05,138
and, uh, Elizabeth Taylor...
370
00:15:05,205 --> 00:15:07,507
in Night of the Iguana.
371
00:15:07,574 --> 00:15:10,110
Geez, Richard.
372
00:15:10,177 --> 00:15:12,112
What's happening with you?
373
00:15:12,179 --> 00:15:13,813
Um, I'm-I'm good. I'm good.
374
00:15:13,880 --> 00:15:15,315
I-I'm enjoying my night alone.
375
00:15:15,382 --> 00:15:16,984
You should see this table
they gave me.
376
00:15:17,050 --> 00:15:20,120
It's just so big.
377
00:15:20,187 --> 00:15:21,654
How big is it?
378
00:15:21,721 --> 00:15:25,658
It's so big that, uh...
379
00:15:25,725 --> 00:15:27,995
yeah, I don't care.
380
00:15:28,061 --> 00:15:29,262
You don't sound good.
381
00:15:29,329 --> 00:15:31,864
Oh, I'm good. I, um...
Hey, um, oh, no.
382
00:15:31,931 --> 00:15:33,133
Um, I'm sorry.
Excuse me.
383
00:15:33,200 --> 00:15:34,301
Hello? Hello?
No, no, no.
384
00:15:34,367 --> 00:15:36,136
No, no, I'm not
finished eating yet.
385
00:15:36,203 --> 00:15:37,637
If you could just, um...
386
00:15:37,704 --> 00:15:38,671
Ha-hang on
387
00:15:38,738 --> 00:15:39,872
just a second, Richard.
388
00:15:39,939 --> 00:15:41,108
Excuse me. Hi.
389
00:15:41,174 --> 00:15:42,475
I-I know we had
a thing before,
390
00:15:42,542 --> 00:15:45,245
but, um, I'm just taking
a call from my ex-husband.
391
00:15:45,312 --> 00:15:46,813
Could you just watch
this table here
392
00:15:46,879 --> 00:15:48,248
so they don't clear it?
393
00:15:48,315 --> 00:15:50,150
No.
394
00:15:51,051 --> 00:15:53,153
"No"? Did you
just say "no"?
395
00:15:53,220 --> 00:15:54,521
That-that's very nice.
396
00:15:54,587 --> 00:15:56,523
You're a very nice person.
397
00:15:56,589 --> 00:15:59,959
I am through with you.
398
00:16:03,163 --> 00:16:05,298
If you could just keep an eye
on my bag...
399
00:16:06,733 --> 00:16:09,036
Hi. Hi. Richard? I'm back.
400
00:16:09,102 --> 00:16:10,803
Hi. Uh, look,
I was talking to Christine,
401
00:16:10,870 --> 00:16:13,406
and maybe it wasn't good
that we took Ritchie tonight.
402
00:16:13,473 --> 00:16:16,143
Richard, would you please
stop talking to me
403
00:16:16,209 --> 00:16:18,178
like I'm some sort
of a mental patient?
404
00:16:18,245 --> 00:16:19,279
Okay, no, no!
405
00:16:19,346 --> 00:16:21,081
Don't touch my bag!
Yoo-hoo!
406
00:16:21,148 --> 00:16:24,217
That's my bag! That's my bag!
That's my bag!
407
00:16:25,518 --> 00:16:27,320
Okay, you just stay
where you are.
408
00:16:27,387 --> 00:16:28,921
I'm going to bring Ritchie
to you.
409
00:16:28,988 --> 00:16:31,991
No, Richard, I don't have time
for this, all right?
410
00:16:32,059 --> 00:16:34,161
I'm fine. Enjoy your movie.
411
00:16:34,227 --> 00:16:36,296
I'll see you tomorrow morning.
412
00:16:42,202 --> 00:16:43,636
( sighs )
413
00:16:43,703 --> 00:16:44,904
All right.
414
00:16:44,971 --> 00:16:47,640
Who took my bag?
415
00:16:51,211 --> 00:16:53,480
Don't worry, we'll
find your purse.
416
00:16:53,546 --> 00:16:55,482
I'm sure the
busboy cleared it
417
00:16:55,548 --> 00:16:57,517
when he took
your salad plate.
418
00:16:57,584 --> 00:17:00,320
I'm sorry, I just couldn't sit
over there anymore.
419
00:17:00,387 --> 00:17:02,155
You know,
all that negative energy.
420
00:17:02,222 --> 00:17:04,991
I don't really need that
right now.
421
00:17:05,058 --> 00:17:05,992
Of course not.
422
00:17:06,059 --> 00:17:07,527
You've been through a lot.
423
00:17:07,594 --> 00:17:09,096
No, no, but I really am
okay alone.
424
00:17:09,162 --> 00:17:10,330
I really am.
425
00:17:10,397 --> 00:17:12,165
We were only together
for two months.
426
00:17:12,232 --> 00:17:14,067
I mean, two months?
That's like nothing.
427
00:17:14,134 --> 00:17:15,335
Mm-hmm.
428
00:17:18,037 --> 00:17:19,172
Kathy...
429
00:17:19,239 --> 00:17:20,840
now that I've
found love,
430
00:17:20,907 --> 00:17:22,975
I'd be a fool
to let it go.
431
00:17:23,042 --> 00:17:24,644
Oh, my God!
432
00:17:24,711 --> 00:17:27,247
I know it's only
been two months...
433
00:17:31,684 --> 00:17:34,154
...but I never want
to be alone again.
434
00:17:34,221 --> 00:17:35,588
I love you.
435
00:17:35,655 --> 00:17:37,524
( squealing )
Will you marry me?
436
00:17:37,590 --> 00:17:39,692
Yes!
437
00:17:53,806 --> 00:17:55,442
Matthew.
438
00:17:59,812 --> 00:18:00,713
Matthew!
439
00:18:03,583 --> 00:18:05,685
Here. Is that enough?
Yeah.
440
00:18:05,752 --> 00:18:07,053
Thank you so much.
441
00:18:07,120 --> 00:18:08,455
Who stole your purse?
442
00:18:08,521 --> 00:18:11,391
I think it was
the lamb eaters.
443
00:18:12,259 --> 00:18:14,361
They were so mean,
444
00:18:14,427 --> 00:18:19,366
and they made "eyes"
sound like "mind."
445
00:18:19,432 --> 00:18:22,034
Here we go.
Tears and bad Merlot.
446
00:18:22,101 --> 00:18:24,871
It's your crossing guard
all over again.
447
00:18:24,937 --> 00:18:27,707
Oh, shut up.
448
00:18:27,774 --> 00:18:29,108
I'm sad.
449
00:18:29,176 --> 00:18:30,543
Burton?
450
00:18:30,610 --> 00:18:32,512
Yeah. How can
I miss him so much?
451
00:18:32,579 --> 00:18:34,113
God, I've been
through a divorce.
452
00:18:34,181 --> 00:18:35,548
I mean, this should
be nothing.
453
00:18:35,615 --> 00:18:37,250
I guess you liked him
more than you thought.
454
00:18:37,317 --> 00:18:38,518
He wrecked me.
455
00:18:38,585 --> 00:18:39,519
You know, I was
perfectly fine
456
00:18:39,586 --> 00:18:41,721
all by myself
for two years.
457
00:18:41,788 --> 00:18:42,955
I enjoyed it.
458
00:18:43,022 --> 00:18:45,192
And then Burton
comes along,
459
00:18:45,258 --> 00:18:49,362
and it's like he...
defrosted me, you know?
460
00:18:49,429 --> 00:18:51,063
Now I'm like this...
461
00:18:51,130 --> 00:18:56,669
melty, drippy,
freezer-burned mess.
462
00:18:56,736 --> 00:19:00,440
Aw, Burton turned you
into Mom's enchiladas.
463
00:19:00,507 --> 00:19:02,375
How did this
happen to me?
464
00:19:02,442 --> 00:19:04,677
Matthew, I am the one
who broke up with him.
465
00:19:04,744 --> 00:19:08,348
Yeah, you've mentioned
that a couple of 700 times.
466
00:19:09,216 --> 00:19:10,550
Then I was going
to call him,
467
00:19:10,617 --> 00:19:13,886
but I can't figure out
how to work this stupid phone.
468
00:19:13,953 --> 00:19:15,355
They are complicated.
469
00:19:15,422 --> 00:19:17,224
You press "on."
470
00:19:17,290 --> 00:19:18,525
You can't call him.
471
00:19:18,591 --> 00:19:19,659
You broke up with
him for a reason.
472
00:19:19,726 --> 00:19:21,328
Yeah, and what was
that reason again?
473
00:19:21,394 --> 00:19:23,763
You didn't love him.
Yeah, I don't
love this, either.
474
00:19:23,830 --> 00:19:24,731
I know.
475
00:19:24,797 --> 00:19:26,399
Look, the first
night alone
476
00:19:26,466 --> 00:19:27,534
is always the hardest,
477
00:19:27,600 --> 00:19:28,768
but it's going
to get better.
478
00:19:28,835 --> 00:19:30,002
Yeah, whatever.
479
00:19:30,069 --> 00:19:31,371
You going to be okay?
480
00:19:31,438 --> 00:19:33,039
Yeah. I'm just going
to drink my wine,
481
00:19:33,105 --> 00:19:35,575
pay the bill
and go home, okay?
482
00:19:35,642 --> 00:19:38,378
Don't let this
one get away.
483
00:19:41,214 --> 00:19:42,148
Courage.
484
00:19:42,215 --> 00:19:44,217
Yeah.
485
00:19:52,259 --> 00:19:53,560
Hi.
486
00:19:53,626 --> 00:19:57,497
I know I shouldn't be calling,
but, um...
487
00:19:58,398 --> 00:20:02,569
Ah... that was nice.
488
00:20:03,436 --> 00:20:06,639
Yeah, it was...
489
00:20:06,706 --> 00:20:10,510
but, Stan, I need you
to know something.
490
00:20:10,577 --> 00:20:14,847
Um... tonight
was unusual for me.
491
00:20:14,914 --> 00:20:17,717
I-I was in a very
vulnerable position.
492
00:20:17,784 --> 00:20:18,851
I'll say.
493
00:20:18,918 --> 00:20:22,021
I thought your arm
was going to snap off.
494
00:20:22,088 --> 00:20:23,390
Stan, please, please.
495
00:20:23,456 --> 00:20:26,225
I just... I just want
to be clear, all right?
496
00:20:26,293 --> 00:20:30,196
Tonight was... a one-time thing.
497
00:20:30,263 --> 00:20:33,566
Well, technically,
uh, one and a half times,
498
00:20:33,633 --> 00:20:37,370
but if you give me 15 minutes,
I can give you a solid two.
499
00:20:37,437 --> 00:20:38,838
No, that's okay.
500
00:20:38,905 --> 00:20:41,674
I mean, that's a very tempting
offer, but I-I...
501
00:20:41,741 --> 00:20:44,176
I-I do want you to know
that I was having
502
00:20:44,243 --> 00:20:47,213
a hard time tonight, and you
helped me get through it,
503
00:20:47,280 --> 00:20:50,883
so I just want to say thank you.
504
00:20:50,950 --> 00:20:53,052
You're welcome.
505
00:20:53,119 --> 00:20:54,821
Can I tell people?
506
00:20:54,887 --> 00:20:55,888
No, you may not.
507
00:20:55,955 --> 00:20:57,957
Can I put it in the book?
508
00:20:58,024 --> 00:21:00,327
Okay.
34789
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