All language subtitles for Superstore.S02E20.Cheyennes.Wedding.720p.WEB.x264-[MULVAcoded]

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic Download
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch Download
en English Download
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranî)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish Download
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil)
pt Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,469 --> 00:00:04,569 What am I suppose to wear to your wedding? The invitation just says, 2 00:00:04,572 --> 00:00:06,039 "Not basic." 3 00:00:06,040 --> 00:00:07,340 - You know, not basic. 4 00:00:07,341 --> 00:00:09,509 I don't know how to explain it more than that. 5 00:00:09,510 --> 00:00:12,010 - Yeah, like, Adam's wearing a gray suit. 6 00:00:12,013 --> 00:00:14,080 - Mm, I mean, that's, like, semi-basic, 7 00:00:14,081 --> 00:00:15,749 but you guys are old. 8 00:00:15,750 --> 00:00:19,350 - I didn't know you were bringing Adam. 9 00:00:19,353 --> 00:00:21,489 - Yeah, I thought your marriage was, like, 10 00:00:25,760 --> 00:00:27,227 - No, it's fine. 11 00:00:27,228 --> 00:00:29,228 We... we're just... We're in couples counseling, 12 00:00:29,230 --> 00:00:31,498 and it's fine, and, please, nobody be weird around him. 13 00:00:31,499 --> 00:00:33,229 Okay? - No... 14 00:00:33,234 --> 00:00:35,101 I'm, like, super cazh. 15 00:00:35,102 --> 00:00:36,602 - And, please, nobody say "super cazh," 16 00:00:36,604 --> 00:00:38,371 like, as a life rule. 17 00:00:38,372 --> 00:00:40,106 - Well, personally, I'm gonna wear a polo dress. 18 00:00:40,107 --> 00:00:43,237 All right? It's simple, beautiful, elegant... 19 00:00:43,244 --> 00:00:44,511 Oh, but then again, I do have one 20 00:00:44,512 --> 00:00:46,112 of Nancy Pelosi's old pantsuits. 21 00:00:46,113 --> 00:00:47,247 I won it at an auction. 22 00:00:47,248 --> 00:00:48,508 Do you think that would be better? 23 00:00:48,516 --> 00:00:50,516 - I'm actually just wearing my bridesmaid's dress. 24 00:00:50,518 --> 00:00:51,778 - You asked Amy to be a bridesmaid, 25 00:00:51,786 --> 00:00:53,246 but you didn't ask me? 26 00:00:53,254 --> 00:00:54,788 - What? Ohhh! 27 00:00:54,789 --> 00:00:57,357 Uhhh... 28 00:00:57,358 --> 00:00:58,618 Yah! - I get it. 29 00:00:58,626 --> 00:01:02,356 I just kind of always wanted to be a bridesmaid, and I... 30 00:01:02,363 --> 00:01:04,363 I don't know if I'll ever get another chance. 31 00:01:04,365 --> 00:01:05,355 I mean... 32 00:01:05,366 --> 00:01:07,096 my sister's just so ugly. 33 00:01:07,101 --> 00:01:09,369 - All right, Dina... 34 00:01:09,370 --> 00:01:11,570 you can be a bridesmaid. 35 00:01:11,572 --> 00:01:13,206 - Yes! Oh! 36 00:01:13,207 --> 00:01:14,607 You will not regret this. 37 00:01:14,608 --> 00:01:16,608 Okay, I'm gonna need to see my dress asap, 38 00:01:16,610 --> 00:01:18,610 in case I want to change the cut or the color. 39 00:01:29,090 --> 00:01:31,590 - Does this sound fancy to you? 40 00:01:31,592 --> 00:01:35,228 - Nah, just sounds like gold clinking up against crystal. 41 00:01:35,229 --> 00:01:36,496 - What? 42 00:01:36,497 --> 00:01:39,227 Those are two of the most expensive things! 43 00:01:39,233 --> 00:01:43,369 I just got something from the "lost and found" bin at work. 44 00:01:43,370 --> 00:01:45,238 - I don't want people spending money 45 00:01:45,239 --> 00:01:48,469 they might not have tomorrow. 46 00:01:48,476 --> 00:01:50,876 Corporate is making me lay off six people. 47 00:01:50,878 --> 00:01:52,208 - Whoa. There's gonna be layoffs? 48 00:01:52,213 --> 00:01:54,481 I don't want anyone to know. 49 00:01:54,482 --> 00:01:55,582 - Okay, well, they're gonna find out 50 00:01:55,583 --> 00:01:57,217 when the paychecks stop coming. 51 00:01:57,218 --> 00:01:58,878 - I'll tell them tomorrow. - Mm. 52 00:01:58,886 --> 00:02:01,546 - Cheyenne's wedding should be a day of joy... 53 00:02:01,555 --> 00:02:03,155 that people look back on and say, 54 00:02:03,157 --> 00:02:05,157 "I was happy that day. 55 00:02:05,159 --> 00:02:07,559 That was the last day I was happy." 56 00:02:07,561 --> 00:02:09,429 - You look fine. - Yeah? Fine? 57 00:02:09,430 --> 00:02:10,660 - Yeah, fine. Yeah, good, like... 58 00:02:10,664 --> 00:02:11,864 Like you always do. 59 00:02:11,866 --> 00:02:13,126 Nice, you look nice. - Thanks. 60 00:02:13,134 --> 00:02:14,234 You too. 61 00:02:14,235 --> 00:02:15,625 I feel like everyone is looking at us. 62 00:02:15,636 --> 00:02:18,266 Adam, nobody's looking at us. 63 00:02:18,272 --> 00:02:19,272 - Adam! 64 00:02:19,273 --> 00:02:20,273 Sorry. Adam. 65 00:02:20,274 --> 00:02:21,541 Hey! 66 00:02:21,542 --> 00:02:24,642 - You know what? Come on, let's bring it in here. 67 00:02:24,645 --> 00:02:26,275 - Hey. - Yeah! 68 00:02:26,280 --> 00:02:27,410 It's good to see you. 69 00:02:27,414 --> 00:02:29,149 What's up? What's new with you? 70 00:02:29,150 --> 00:02:31,417 I mean, with work, not... Not personal stuff. 71 00:02:31,418 --> 00:02:33,286 - Super cazh. - No doubt. 72 00:02:33,287 --> 00:02:35,287 - Still unemployed, but... 73 00:02:35,289 --> 00:02:36,657 - Cool. 74 00:02:38,926 --> 00:02:40,386 - I'm Kristen, by the way. - Yes! 75 00:02:40,394 --> 00:02:41,928 That's Kristen. - Hi. 76 00:02:41,929 --> 00:02:43,359 - My husband. - My... my husband. 77 00:02:43,364 --> 00:02:45,264 Sorry, that's... Yeah. - It's my husband. 78 00:02:48,269 --> 00:02:49,399 Oh. 79 00:02:49,403 --> 00:02:51,638 - I... - What are you doing here? 80 00:02:51,639 --> 00:02:53,539 - Hi. - Hello. 81 00:02:53,541 --> 00:02:55,541 - Jear Bear, can you go get my vape pen? 82 00:02:55,543 --> 00:02:56,943 I left it in the car. 83 00:02:56,944 --> 00:02:58,944 - Oh, you're here together. 84 00:02:58,946 --> 00:03:00,706 - Yeah! You remember Jerry. 85 00:03:00,714 --> 00:03:02,614 We all met at that restaurant. 86 00:03:02,616 --> 00:03:04,346 - It's nice to see you again. 87 00:03:04,351 --> 00:03:06,219 - It's nice to see you again... 88 00:03:06,220 --> 00:03:08,620 also. 89 00:03:08,622 --> 00:03:10,356 - Kind of need that vape pen now. 90 00:03:10,357 --> 00:03:12,187 - Right. Sorry. 91 00:03:12,725 --> 00:03:16,495 - I love how strawberry smoke smells in my hair. 92 00:03:21,669 --> 00:03:24,699 Beautiful, ladies, perfect. 93 00:03:24,705 --> 00:03:25,695 Ma'am, could you lean back? 94 00:03:25,706 --> 00:03:26,966 There's a shadow on the bride. 95 00:03:26,974 --> 00:03:28,708 - Oh, sure. 96 00:03:28,709 --> 00:03:30,439 - How are you feeling? Are you nervous? 97 00:03:30,444 --> 00:03:31,778 - No, just excited. 98 00:03:31,779 --> 00:03:33,679 - Listen, I filled my purse with muscle relaxants 99 00:03:33,681 --> 00:03:35,348 and anti-flatulent meds. 100 00:03:35,349 --> 00:03:37,217 Oh, and if you're gonna puke, you can use the purse. 101 00:03:37,218 --> 00:03:38,348 - Okay, thanks. 102 00:03:38,352 --> 00:03:39,719 - Told you I'd be a good bridesmaid. 103 00:03:39,720 --> 00:03:41,520 - It's okay to be nervous, if you are, you know? 104 00:03:41,522 --> 00:03:43,389 I was totally nervous at my wedding. 105 00:03:43,390 --> 00:03:45,658 I was like, "Aah! Should I run away?" 106 00:03:45,659 --> 00:03:47,389 Wouldn't that be so funny 107 00:03:47,394 --> 00:03:48,561 if you just, like, ran away 108 00:03:48,562 --> 00:03:52,298 I was just kidding. 109 00:03:52,299 --> 00:03:53,799 What if we did our squad pose? 110 00:03:53,801 --> 00:03:56,701 - Yeah! Squad pose! 111 00:03:56,704 --> 00:03:57,671 - Oh, yeah. 112 00:03:57,672 --> 00:03:58,801 - Oh, okay... 113 00:03:58,806 --> 00:04:00,006 - Dina, just... - I'm sorry. 114 00:04:00,007 --> 00:04:01,307 - Maybe lean... - What? 115 00:04:01,308 --> 00:04:02,368 - Just lean. - I'm leaning. 116 00:04:02,376 --> 00:04:03,376 - Lean in. - I'm leaning! 117 00:04:03,377 --> 00:04:04,377 - Shadow. 118 00:04:04,378 --> 00:04:07,578 - Yo, fellas, like, "sinceriously," thank you 119 00:04:07,581 --> 00:04:09,581 for attending my nuptials and what-have-you-not. 120 00:04:09,583 --> 00:04:10,717 - Sure. - Yeah. 121 00:04:10,718 --> 00:04:13,718 I never thought I'd have so many nerds at my wedding. 122 00:04:13,721 --> 00:04:14,721 You know what I'm saying? Ha. 123 00:04:14,722 --> 00:04:16,689 - Ooh! Drama. 124 00:04:16,690 --> 00:04:18,458 Amy's real husband. 125 00:04:18,459 --> 00:04:19,826 Amy's work husband. 126 00:04:19,827 --> 00:04:21,727 - Work husband? Huh. 127 00:04:21,729 --> 00:04:23,729 Should I be worried? - No! 128 00:04:23,731 --> 00:04:25,598 No, I mean... No, I got you. 129 00:04:25,599 --> 00:04:28,729 Fight, fight, fight, fight! 130 00:04:28,736 --> 00:04:30,466 - Yeah, yeah, you are Amy's work husband. 131 00:04:30,471 --> 00:04:32,601 I see you two together, like, all the time, 132 00:04:32,606 --> 00:04:34,736 walking around, you know... 133 00:04:34,742 --> 00:04:36,609 It's like he's got wedding brain. 134 00:04:36,610 --> 00:04:38,610 Sure. Okay. 135 00:04:38,612 --> 00:04:40,712 - Whoa! Easy on the shrimp! 136 00:04:40,714 --> 00:04:42,614 Those are supposed to be for everybody. 137 00:04:42,616 --> 00:04:43,746 - I only took a few. 138 00:04:43,751 --> 00:04:45,351 - Yeah, took a few hundred. 139 00:04:45,352 --> 00:04:46,852 All right, put that back. - Okay. 140 00:04:46,854 --> 00:04:49,354 - Yo, keep this girl away from the ocean! 141 00:04:49,356 --> 00:04:51,056 That's where all the shrimp's at. 142 00:04:51,058 --> 00:04:54,527 - These people aren't cogs you can just throw away. 143 00:04:54,528 --> 00:04:55,758 They're a family. 144 00:04:55,763 --> 00:04:58,631 They talk. They stand around. 145 00:04:58,632 --> 00:05:00,832 I guess that's all they're doing right now. 146 00:05:00,834 --> 00:05:03,536 I wish Jeff could see this. 147 00:05:03,537 --> 00:05:05,767 Maybe I should invite Jeff here. 148 00:05:05,773 --> 00:05:06,773 - Yes. 149 00:05:06,774 --> 00:05:09,310 You should definitely do that. 150 00:05:22,690 --> 00:05:24,657 - What is he wearing? 151 00:05:24,658 --> 00:05:26,558 He looks like a woman. 152 00:05:26,560 --> 00:05:27,690 - Bo? 153 00:05:27,695 --> 00:05:28,785 Bo is a woman. 154 00:05:28,796 --> 00:05:29,796 - Oh? 155 00:05:29,797 --> 00:05:31,697 Lesbians. 156 00:05:31,699 --> 00:05:32,659 Big-time. 157 00:05:32,666 --> 00:05:35,666 - The whole world's going gay. 158 00:05:37,438 --> 00:05:38,438 - Bigger steps. 159 00:05:38,439 --> 00:05:39,806 You guys are killing our pace. 160 00:05:39,807 --> 00:05:42,107 And one of you is wearing too much Cool Water. 161 00:05:42,109 --> 00:05:43,439 - Yeah, that's me, Dina. 162 00:05:43,444 --> 00:05:45,444 - Aw, Amy looks beautiful. 163 00:05:45,446 --> 00:05:46,576 - Not my type. 164 00:05:46,580 --> 00:05:47,680 - Mm-mm. No, I only like 165 00:05:47,681 --> 00:05:50,681 tall, blue-eyed blondes... 166 00:05:50,684 --> 00:05:54,121 and shorter Asians, but that is it. 167 00:06:11,437 --> 00:06:13,567 - Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today 168 00:06:13,574 --> 00:06:16,442 to witness the union of Cheyenne Taylor Lee 169 00:06:16,443 --> 00:06:18,711 and Bilbo Derek Thompson in holy matrimony, 170 00:06:18,712 --> 00:06:20,847 to be joined as husband and wife 171 00:06:20,848 --> 00:06:21,878 for all eternity. 172 00:06:21,882 --> 00:06:23,616 - No, I can't do this, okay? No. 173 00:06:23,617 --> 00:06:26,847 - No, okay? I got to be free. You can't chain me down! 174 00:06:28,822 --> 00:06:30,757 Do you have to do this right now? 175 00:06:30,758 --> 00:06:32,788 - Cheyenne, maybe it's for the best. 176 00:06:32,793 --> 00:06:34,660 - No, what's up? This can't wait, okay? 177 00:06:34,661 --> 00:06:36,529 Okay, I can't stand up in here and say all these words 178 00:06:36,530 --> 00:06:39,899 about loving you forever. 179 00:06:39,900 --> 00:06:41,768 But I can rap them. 180 00:06:41,769 --> 00:06:43,899 - Then we're gonna need a sick-ass beat. 181 00:06:43,904 --> 00:06:46,507 Spit fire, Minister Funk-Ah-Khan! 182 00:06:47,875 --> 00:06:49,875 - Yeah! 183 00:06:51,779 --> 00:06:53,879 - She's very charismatic. 184 00:06:59,820 --> 00:07:01,750 - Hey! 185 00:07:01,755 --> 00:07:04,115 - Ain't no way I'm getting hitched to my ride-or-die 186 00:07:04,124 --> 00:07:05,992 without my boys here repping me, son. 187 00:07:05,993 --> 00:07:07,893 What's up? 188 00:07:07,895 --> 00:07:08,985 Yeah! 189 00:07:08,996 --> 00:07:11,126 Auntie Beth! Oh, my! 190 00:07:11,131 --> 00:07:13,031 So good to see you. 191 00:07:13,033 --> 00:07:14,600 Are you getting younger or prettier? 192 00:07:14,601 --> 00:07:16,001 I can't tell. 193 00:07:19,907 --> 00:07:21,767 Ow! - Relax, Bridezilla. 194 00:07:21,775 --> 00:07:23,135 So, as your bridesmaid, 195 00:07:23,143 --> 00:07:26,043 I'm supposed to come hold your dress while you... 196 00:07:26,046 --> 00:07:27,906 you know, piss and. 197 00:07:27,915 --> 00:07:29,645 And I'm clocking you in at three hours 198 00:07:29,650 --> 00:07:30,780 since your last pit stop. 199 00:07:30,784 --> 00:07:32,784 - Um, I-I'm good, thank you. 200 00:07:32,786 --> 00:07:33,916 - Yeah. 201 00:07:33,921 --> 00:07:36,021 For me, now is kind of perfect, 202 00:07:36,023 --> 00:07:38,923 because those mini pizzas you served earlier are just... 203 00:07:38,926 --> 00:07:39,926 not sitting. 204 00:07:39,927 --> 00:07:41,627 Okay, fine, I'll go. 205 00:07:41,628 --> 00:07:42,828 - Let's do this. 206 00:07:42,830 --> 00:07:44,697 - Oh! Table three. 207 00:07:44,698 --> 00:07:45,958 Party table. Whoo! 208 00:07:45,966 --> 00:07:48,096 - Whoo! - Ooh-ah. 209 00:07:48,101 --> 00:07:49,969 - No, that... that's not what we were doing. 210 00:07:49,970 --> 00:07:51,970 - Yeah, I know. 211 00:07:51,972 --> 00:07:53,972 - Um... 212 00:07:53,974 --> 00:07:55,708 Oh, okay. 213 00:07:55,709 --> 00:07:57,977 Uh, you know what? maybe we should sit somewhere else. 214 00:07:57,978 --> 00:07:59,708 - Pretty sure you're supposed to sit at the table 215 00:07:59,713 --> 00:08:00,913 they tell you to. 216 00:08:00,914 --> 00:08:02,648 - Okay, square. 217 00:08:02,649 --> 00:08:04,917 I don't know how you stayed married to her. 218 00:08:04,918 --> 00:08:06,918 I didn't mean... That wasn't... 219 00:08:06,920 --> 00:08:07,987 Um, cool! 220 00:08:07,988 --> 00:08:09,588 Cool, cool. 221 00:08:09,590 --> 00:08:10,756 All right. 222 00:08:10,757 --> 00:08:12,117 How're we doing over here, huh? 223 00:08:12,125 --> 00:08:13,625 - What are you doing? 224 00:08:13,627 --> 00:08:15,027 - I just like to sit... 225 00:08:15,028 --> 00:08:17,658 facing Elias. 226 00:08:17,664 --> 00:08:19,632 Hey. 227 00:08:19,633 --> 00:08:22,001 - Table nine, the buffet is now open. 228 00:08:22,002 --> 00:08:23,132 Go wild. 229 00:08:23,136 --> 00:08:24,766 - You're making announcements? 230 00:08:24,771 --> 00:08:28,741 - Well, what can I say, man? I just love the power. 231 00:08:28,742 --> 00:08:30,009 Table eight. 232 00:08:30,010 --> 00:08:32,610 Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah! 233 00:08:32,613 --> 00:08:34,981 Now you can go. 234 00:08:34,982 --> 00:08:36,182 - Hey. - There you are! 235 00:08:36,183 --> 00:08:37,183 - What's the emergency? 236 00:08:37,184 --> 00:08:39,184 - Oh, my God. - What? 237 00:08:39,186 --> 00:08:41,046 - You remember Cheyenne, don't you? 238 00:08:41,054 --> 00:08:42,922 She just got married. 239 00:08:42,923 --> 00:08:45,191 - Hi. Yes, this is your wedding. 240 00:08:45,192 --> 00:08:46,959 So why would you... I'm sorry that I'm... 241 00:08:46,960 --> 00:08:47,960 I'm wearing shorts. 242 00:08:47,961 --> 00:08:49,691 I was at a Frisbee golf thing. 243 00:08:49,696 --> 00:08:50,926 - Cool. - It's cool. It's cool. 244 00:08:50,931 --> 00:08:52,831 Hey, fun fact about Cheyenne 245 00:08:52,833 --> 00:08:54,967 is she's severely uneducated, 246 00:08:54,968 --> 00:08:58,698 standing between her and prostitution. 247 00:08:58,705 --> 00:09:01,035 Now, let me introduce you to some other peeps 248 00:09:01,041 --> 00:09:02,808 who are right on the poverty line. 249 00:09:02,809 --> 00:09:03,976 - I'm sorry about the... 250 00:09:03,977 --> 00:09:07,707 - I never prostituted. - No. 251 00:09:07,714 --> 00:09:08,948 - What you have been... - So how have... 252 00:09:08,949 --> 00:09:10,979 Sorry. 253 00:09:10,984 --> 00:09:12,218 You go. 254 00:09:12,219 --> 00:09:13,849 - How's your boyfriend? 255 00:09:13,854 --> 00:09:14,954 - We're not dating anymore. 256 00:09:14,955 --> 00:09:17,055 - Oh. Um... 257 00:09:17,057 --> 00:09:18,217 I'm sorry to hear that. 258 00:09:18,225 --> 00:09:20,985 - Yeah. 259 00:09:20,994 --> 00:09:23,134 I made him up. 260 00:09:25,264 --> 00:09:27,033 - Okay. - Thank you. 261 00:09:27,034 --> 00:09:30,703 - I need a super-embarrassing story about you. 262 00:09:30,704 --> 00:09:32,204 - Why? - It's just for my speech. 263 00:09:32,205 --> 00:09:36,065 But if it could rhyme with "fellatio," that would be icing. 264 00:09:36,076 --> 00:09:37,976 - No, Dina, most of the bridesmaids 265 00:09:37,978 --> 00:09:38,978 aren't giving toasts. 266 00:09:38,979 --> 00:09:40,246 I'm not. - Well... 267 00:09:40,247 --> 00:09:42,107 I mean, no offense, but you're not funny. 268 00:09:42,115 --> 00:09:43,245 - I'm funny. 269 00:09:43,250 --> 00:09:44,880 - Sure, you're hilarious. 270 00:09:44,885 --> 00:09:46,015 Come on. 271 00:09:46,019 --> 00:09:46,987 - Oh, my God. You look so gorgeous. 272 00:09:46,988 --> 00:09:48,747 The ceremony was beautiful. 273 00:09:48,755 --> 00:09:49,985 Why the hell did you invite Jeff? 274 00:09:49,990 --> 00:09:52,120 - I didn't. I think he came with Glenn. 275 00:09:52,125 --> 00:09:54,025 No, a-as a friend. 276 00:09:54,027 --> 00:09:56,257 - I'm not ready to talk to Jeff right now. 277 00:09:56,263 --> 00:09:58,998 - Mateo, you think I'm funny, right? 278 00:09:58,999 --> 00:10:00,929 Uh-huh. 279 00:10:00,934 --> 00:10:04,937 - Attention, wedding guests, specifically Bo's friends. 280 00:10:04,938 --> 00:10:08,768 Does not mean I am "carrying" Molly. 281 00:10:08,775 --> 00:10:10,775 So please stop asking. 282 00:10:10,777 --> 00:10:12,777 Thank you for shopping at Cloud 9. 283 00:10:12,779 --> 00:10:14,279 Damn it. Sorry. Force of habit. 284 00:10:14,281 --> 00:10:17,049 - Justine lives in a studio apartment, 285 00:10:17,050 --> 00:10:20,320 and she's 40, so obviously a lot of need there. 286 00:10:22,054 --> 00:10:23,023 - Excuse me. - Okay. 287 00:10:23,024 --> 00:10:24,790 - Uh, Glenn. 288 00:10:24,791 --> 00:10:26,058 - What? - I'm... I'm gonna leave now. 289 00:10:26,059 --> 00:10:28,059 - Why? - Because this is a wedding 290 00:10:28,061 --> 00:10:29,161 that I was not invited to. 291 00:10:29,162 --> 00:10:30,796 Plus, I'm wearing shorts. 292 00:10:30,797 --> 00:10:32,297 - I didn't make you wear shorts. 293 00:10:32,299 --> 00:10:33,929 - Still, I'm just gonna... 294 00:10:33,934 --> 00:10:35,067 I got to go. - No, no, no. 295 00:10:35,068 --> 00:10:36,798 You can't leave without saying hi 296 00:10:36,803 --> 00:10:39,071 to Cheyenne's adorable daughter, 297 00:10:39,072 --> 00:10:42,072 And don't let those chubby cheeks fool you. 298 00:10:42,075 --> 00:10:45,075 If her parents can't keep buying food for her... 299 00:10:45,078 --> 00:10:46,808 she'll die. 300 00:10:46,813 --> 00:10:48,813 I'm gonna show you to somebody, yeah. 301 00:10:51,084 --> 00:10:52,184 Wait. 302 00:10:52,185 --> 00:10:54,015 - What am I supposed to do with this? 303 00:11:01,028 --> 00:11:02,788 - Okay... 304 00:11:02,796 --> 00:11:04,156 - Mama. 305 00:11:04,164 --> 00:11:06,032 - What is his game? 306 00:11:06,033 --> 00:11:08,033 He just shows up out of nowhere, 307 00:11:08,035 --> 00:11:10,935 flashing those legs, carrying a baby around. 308 00:11:10,937 --> 00:11:13,937 I get it... You're father material. 309 00:11:13,940 --> 00:11:17,877 I mean, I hate kids, but I love dads. 310 00:11:17,878 --> 00:11:20,678 - So do you always play the man? 311 00:11:20,681 --> 00:11:22,048 - Uh... yeah. 312 00:11:22,049 --> 00:11:23,679 Yeah, most of the time. 313 00:11:23,684 --> 00:11:27,053 - Oh, that's... That's wonderful. 314 00:11:27,054 --> 00:11:30,823 - Oh, I see you went with the Pink Cheyenne. 315 00:11:30,824 --> 00:11:34,694 - Yeah, it's Code Red, vodka, and 13 cherries. 316 00:11:34,695 --> 00:11:36,055 I'm kind of into it. 317 00:11:36,063 --> 00:11:38,963 - Oh, look. There you guys are. 318 00:11:38,965 --> 00:11:40,065 - Oh, that's cute. 319 00:11:40,067 --> 00:11:41,197 - Yeah, yeah. 320 00:11:41,201 --> 00:11:43,069 But that is atypical, you know? 321 00:11:43,070 --> 00:11:44,937 If you caught us on a normal day, 322 00:11:44,938 --> 00:11:46,938 she'd probably have her hands around my neck, you know... 323 00:11:46,940 --> 00:11:48,470 "Jonah, you screwed up again. 324 00:11:48,475 --> 00:11:49,935 Go clean Softlines." 325 00:11:49,943 --> 00:11:51,077 - Okay, I don't talk like that. 326 00:11:51,078 --> 00:11:52,808 - Well, sometimes. 327 00:11:52,813 --> 00:11:54,813 "Adam, wash your tennis shoes. 328 00:11:54,815 --> 00:11:56,075 They're disgusting." 329 00:11:56,083 --> 00:11:57,783 - Okay, well, they are disgusting 330 00:11:57,784 --> 00:11:59,251 'cause there was a family of spiders living in them, so... 331 00:11:59,252 --> 00:12:01,987 - Okay, well, they're my shoes, and I paid for them, 332 00:12:01,988 --> 00:12:03,756 so it's kind of none of your business. 333 00:12:03,757 --> 00:12:05,117 - Yeah, well, I was just asking you to be an adult 334 00:12:05,125 --> 00:12:06,885 every now and then, so... - I know, but still. 335 00:12:06,893 --> 00:12:08,163 - Yeah, okay. 336 00:12:10,162 --> 00:12:12,998 - I'm Team Adam. 337 00:12:12,999 --> 00:12:14,999 - All right, ladies and gents. 338 00:12:15,001 --> 00:12:17,269 I'm gonna get this thing humming with a few jokes. 339 00:12:17,270 --> 00:12:19,038 - Dina, you really don't have to. 340 00:12:19,039 --> 00:12:20,269 - No, it's okay. It's okay. 341 00:12:20,273 --> 00:12:23,109 I'm a bridesmaid. It's part of my job. 342 00:12:23,110 --> 00:12:24,276 All right, joke one... 343 00:12:24,277 --> 00:12:27,007 Marriage is a three-ring circus, 344 00:12:27,013 --> 00:12:28,913 engagement ring, 345 00:12:28,915 --> 00:12:30,275 wedding ring, 346 00:12:30,283 --> 00:12:32,323 suffering. 347 00:12:34,019 --> 00:12:35,889 So... 348 00:12:43,130 --> 00:12:44,997 - That's a grammar joke. 349 00:12:44,998 --> 00:12:46,766 If English isn't your first language, 350 00:12:46,767 --> 00:12:49,027 that one may be lost on you. 351 00:12:49,035 --> 00:12:51,135 Okay, next up... 352 00:12:51,138 --> 00:12:54,006 What do you call a woman who likes small penises? 353 00:12:54,007 --> 00:12:55,807 Hopefully Cheyenne. - Okay. 354 00:12:55,809 --> 00:12:57,009 - I'm kidding. The little ones tend to be... 355 00:12:57,010 --> 00:12:58,778 - All right, thank you, Dina, 356 00:12:58,779 --> 00:13:01,209 for those beautiful and appropriate words. 357 00:13:01,214 --> 00:13:02,348 - Yeah, well, good luck, 358 00:13:02,349 --> 00:13:06,819 'cause this crowd blows! 359 00:13:06,820 --> 00:13:07,950 - Uh, hi. 360 00:13:07,954 --> 00:13:09,321 I just wanted to say 361 00:13:09,322 --> 00:13:12,822 congratulations to Cheyenne and Bo. 362 00:13:14,326 --> 00:13:15,926 Um... 363 00:13:15,929 --> 00:13:18,197 uh, I... I love you, Cheyenne. 364 00:13:18,198 --> 00:13:21,066 You remind me of me. 365 00:13:21,067 --> 00:13:23,836 I-I also met my husband in high school, 366 00:13:23,837 --> 00:13:25,797 and we did the whole "baby first" thing, 367 00:13:25,806 --> 00:13:27,906 and then got married because we had to. 368 00:13:27,908 --> 00:13:29,168 I mean, not... Wah! 369 00:13:29,176 --> 00:13:31,036 I didn't mean we had to. I meant... 370 00:13:31,044 --> 00:13:33,946 I meant we got pregnant so we got married... 371 00:13:33,947 --> 00:13:35,907 but, um, marriage is amazing! 372 00:13:35,916 --> 00:13:37,946 I mean, is it hard work? 373 00:13:37,951 --> 00:13:39,819 Yes. Duh. 374 00:13:39,820 --> 00:13:40,920 Like, that's the cliché, right? 375 00:13:40,921 --> 00:13:43,189 "Ah, it's so hard," because it is. 376 00:13:43,190 --> 00:13:45,057 You know, one second everything's great, 377 00:13:45,058 --> 00:13:46,926 and then you step on some invisible land mine, 378 00:13:46,927 --> 00:13:47,987 and you're fighting. 379 00:13:47,994 --> 00:13:50,062 Boom! Ka-boom! 380 00:13:50,063 --> 00:13:52,063 Uh... 381 00:13:52,065 --> 00:13:54,195 'Cause it's hard. It's just... It's hard. 382 00:13:54,201 --> 00:13:55,831 But... 383 00:13:55,836 --> 00:13:57,266 it is the hard 384 00:13:57,270 --> 00:14:01,040 that makes it good. 385 00:14:01,041 --> 00:14:03,409 That was from "A League of Their Own." 386 00:14:03,410 --> 00:14:05,140 Why did Madonna and Rosie O'Donnell 387 00:14:05,145 --> 00:14:08,045 I feel like something happened there, right? 388 00:14:08,048 --> 00:14:11,148 Maybe we should talk about that. 389 00:14:11,151 --> 00:14:13,419 - The desert table is now open 390 00:14:13,420 --> 00:14:17,020 for anybody who would like to stop talking. 391 00:14:17,023 --> 00:14:19,258 - But, okay, what I'm trying to say 392 00:14:19,259 --> 00:14:22,389 is that no matter how tough it gets, 393 00:14:22,395 --> 00:14:24,125 it's gonna be fine. 394 00:14:24,130 --> 00:14:26,030 It's gonna be... 395 00:14:26,032 --> 00:14:28,000 so... 396 00:14:28,001 --> 00:14:29,001 fine. 397 00:14:29,002 --> 00:14:30,132 You know? 398 00:14:30,136 --> 00:14:31,396 Just give me the... Give it... 399 00:14:31,404 --> 00:14:32,904 - But I... - Give it to me. 400 00:14:34,040 --> 00:14:35,407 You heard it here first, folks. 401 00:14:35,408 --> 00:14:37,138 Marriage is fine. 402 00:14:37,143 --> 00:14:38,943 Yikes. 403 00:14:40,313 --> 00:14:42,448 - Oh! Oh, you like the joke about Amy's marriage? 404 00:14:42,449 --> 00:14:44,079 'Cause I got a ton of those. 405 00:14:44,084 --> 00:14:46,184 Amy's marriage is so bad... 406 00:14:46,186 --> 00:14:48,046 How bad is it? 407 00:14:56,129 --> 00:14:58,429 - Wow. You're a really good dancer. 408 00:14:58,431 --> 00:15:00,431 - Thanks. You too. 409 00:15:06,006 --> 00:15:08,036 - Hey, do you think Amy's okay? 410 00:15:08,041 --> 00:15:10,041 - Aw. You worried about your work wife? 411 00:15:10,043 --> 00:15:11,911 - Me? No. No, I don't even care about her. 412 00:15:11,912 --> 00:15:13,042 No. 413 00:15:13,046 --> 00:15:14,446 Hey. We should move in together. 414 00:15:14,447 --> 00:15:15,907 - What? 415 00:15:15,916 --> 00:15:17,176 Dude, what is with you tonight? 416 00:15:20,186 --> 00:15:22,446 - I'm tired. I think I want to head out. 417 00:15:22,455 --> 00:15:24,085 - Okay, yeah. 418 00:15:24,090 --> 00:15:25,920 I'll just say good-bye to everybody, and we can go. 419 00:15:25,926 --> 00:15:27,326 - No, you should stay. 420 00:15:27,327 --> 00:15:28,327 I'll grab a cab. 421 00:15:28,328 --> 00:15:30,458 - Adam. 422 00:15:30,463 --> 00:15:33,063 Look, I'm sorry about the toast, okay? 423 00:15:33,066 --> 00:15:35,066 I-I-I didn't know what to say. 424 00:15:35,068 --> 00:15:36,468 I just... I started rambling, 425 00:15:36,469 --> 00:15:38,069 and then I couldn't stop rambling. 426 00:15:38,071 --> 00:15:39,471 I wasn't even... - Would you have married me 427 00:15:39,472 --> 00:15:41,472 if we hadn't gotten pregnant? 428 00:15:44,311 --> 00:15:46,079 - Would you have asked? 429 00:15:50,450 --> 00:15:52,250 - Well, then what are we doing? 430 00:15:54,421 --> 00:15:57,021 - Thank you. - Dina, this is for you. 431 00:15:57,023 --> 00:15:58,357 - What's this? 432 00:15:58,358 --> 00:16:02,088 - It's my bridesmaid gift, just to say thank you. 433 00:16:02,095 --> 00:16:04,095 - Oh. 434 00:16:04,097 --> 00:16:06,527 You're welcome. 435 00:16:06,533 --> 00:16:07,533 You know what? 436 00:16:07,534 --> 00:16:09,168 Actually, I don't feel comfortable 437 00:16:09,169 --> 00:16:10,969 taking cheap jewelry into my house. 438 00:16:10,971 --> 00:16:14,106 Then it's another midnight run to the urgent care. 439 00:16:14,107 --> 00:16:17,377 So I think you should return it and just give me the cash. 440 00:16:19,111 --> 00:16:21,511 Thanks, girl. 441 00:16:21,514 --> 00:16:23,314 - Sometimes the headline will say, 442 00:16:23,316 --> 00:16:25,446 "What happens next is unbelievable," 443 00:16:25,452 --> 00:16:28,187 but then it's, like, kind of underwhelming. 444 00:16:28,188 --> 00:16:32,088 It's almost like they're trying to trick me into clicking. 445 00:16:32,092 --> 00:16:33,592 - I'm tired. Let's go. 446 00:16:33,593 --> 00:16:35,327 - Already? They haven't even cut the cake. 447 00:16:35,328 --> 00:16:37,096 - I've seen people cut cake before. 448 00:16:37,097 --> 00:16:38,257 Let's go. 449 00:16:40,200 --> 00:16:42,067 - I really enjoyed talking to you. 450 00:16:42,068 --> 00:16:44,168 - I really enjoyed talking to you, too. 451 00:16:44,170 --> 00:16:46,438 - I can't start the car with my mind! 452 00:16:46,439 --> 00:16:47,439 - Bye. 453 00:16:47,440 --> 00:16:49,170 - Bye. 454 00:16:54,447 --> 00:16:56,447 Jeff! - Shh. 455 00:16:56,449 --> 00:17:00,249 - Have you been at the wedding this entire time? 456 00:17:00,253 --> 00:17:03,422 You saw me when I came in, and then I think we made eye contact 457 00:17:03,423 --> 00:17:05,257 when we were both in line for the bathroom a while ago. 458 00:17:05,258 --> 00:17:08,158 I don't think so. I... 459 00:17:08,161 --> 00:17:10,261 Anyway, um, it's good to see you. 460 00:17:10,263 --> 00:17:12,263 - Not you. I hate you. 461 00:17:12,265 --> 00:17:16,165 You dumped me out of nowhere, so of course I hate you. 462 00:17:16,169 --> 00:17:17,499 It just sounds funny because I'm whispering. 463 00:17:17,504 --> 00:17:19,138 Because I don't want to wake the baby up because... 464 00:17:19,139 --> 00:17:20,339 And thank you. 465 00:17:20,340 --> 00:17:23,140 Now she's awake. 466 00:17:23,143 --> 00:17:24,476 You just can't stop hurting me. 467 00:17:24,477 --> 00:17:26,537 Okay, here we go. I'm gonna trade you. 468 00:17:26,546 --> 00:17:28,176 You take her. 469 00:17:28,181 --> 00:17:29,681 She doesn't like to bounced, okay? 470 00:17:29,682 --> 00:17:31,150 I hate you. 471 00:17:31,151 --> 00:17:33,381 Not you. I love you. 472 00:17:49,102 --> 00:17:51,402 - Hey. 473 00:17:51,404 --> 00:17:52,471 - Hi. 474 00:17:52,472 --> 00:17:55,441 - Just getting some fresh air. 475 00:17:55,442 --> 00:17:57,509 - Where's Kristen? 476 00:17:57,510 --> 00:18:00,410 - Uh, Kristen needed a break... 477 00:18:01,414 --> 00:18:03,550 From me. 478 00:18:06,553 --> 00:18:07,619 Where's Adam? 479 00:18:07,620 --> 00:18:09,450 - Uh, Adam went home. 480 00:18:11,291 --> 00:18:12,721 - Ah. 481 00:18:12,725 --> 00:18:14,585 Uh, well... 482 00:18:14,594 --> 00:18:16,494 I'll... I'll leave you alone. 483 00:18:16,496 --> 00:18:19,096 - I think my marriage is over. 484 00:18:21,501 --> 00:18:24,401 That's the first time I've said that out loud. 485 00:18:27,273 --> 00:18:30,273 Mm, you gonna say something or...? 486 00:18:33,413 --> 00:18:35,681 I don't know what to say. 487 00:18:35,682 --> 00:18:37,782 - Well, that's a first. 488 00:18:39,551 --> 00:18:43,188 - If anybody can get through this, you can. 489 00:18:43,189 --> 00:18:45,257 - Okay. 490 00:18:45,258 --> 00:18:48,188 - No, no, I'm not... I'm not just saying that. 491 00:18:48,194 --> 00:18:50,194 You're... you're... 492 00:18:50,196 --> 00:18:52,226 you're tough... 493 00:18:52,232 --> 00:18:54,432 and, uh... and persistent 494 00:18:54,434 --> 00:18:56,401 and decisive. 495 00:18:56,402 --> 00:19:00,172 - Mm. Kind of sounds like you're calling me stubborn. 496 00:19:00,173 --> 00:19:03,208 Yeah, well... 497 00:19:03,209 --> 00:19:04,439 you are insanely stubborn and... 498 00:19:04,444 --> 00:19:05,577 - Mm-hmm. Yeah. 499 00:19:05,578 --> 00:19:07,408 - A little domineering... - Uh-huh. 500 00:19:07,413 --> 00:19:08,447 - Caustic maybe. 501 00:19:08,448 --> 00:19:11,317 When I catch you before coffee time... 502 00:19:12,552 --> 00:19:14,686 - You're downright hostile. 503 00:19:14,687 --> 00:19:16,547 - Yeah. 504 00:19:16,556 --> 00:19:18,256 Yeah, you're not wrong. 505 00:19:18,258 --> 00:19:23,258 So just, like, in general, a pretty unpleasant person. 506 00:19:23,263 --> 00:19:25,197 - Yeah, pretty unpleasant, yeah. - Okay. 507 00:19:25,198 --> 00:19:28,298 Notice. 508 00:19:28,301 --> 00:19:32,201 - But you're also the most honest person 509 00:19:32,205 --> 00:19:33,365 that I've ever met. 510 00:19:35,441 --> 00:19:38,441 And you're strong 511 00:19:38,444 --> 00:19:41,213 and smart... 512 00:19:41,214 --> 00:19:42,314 and funny, 513 00:19:42,315 --> 00:19:46,315 and you're confident and caring, 514 00:19:46,319 --> 00:19:49,588 and you're sexy and... 515 00:19:49,589 --> 00:19:51,289 - Um... 516 00:19:51,291 --> 00:19:52,321 - That... I didn't... 517 00:19:52,325 --> 00:19:54,225 - No, I... - I wasn't try... 518 00:19:54,227 --> 00:19:55,587 That was just me... - Uh, yeah. No, I... 519 00:19:55,595 --> 00:19:57,195 - I so didn't... I had a few drinks. 520 00:19:57,197 --> 00:19:58,457 - It's fine. I just... 521 00:19:58,464 --> 00:20:01,533 I think that it's time to cut the cake, so... 522 00:20:01,534 --> 00:20:04,269 I'm just... I'm gonna go inside. 523 00:20:04,270 --> 00:20:05,470 - Okay. Yeah. 524 00:20:05,471 --> 00:20:07,471 - Um... thank you. 525 00:20:07,473 --> 00:20:08,473 Thanks, yeah. 526 00:20:22,487 --> 00:20:23,587 - Hello. 527 00:20:24,624 --> 00:20:26,858 - Oh. 528 00:20:26,859 --> 00:20:28,859 Did you forget something? 529 00:20:28,861 --> 00:20:30,761 - Yeah. 530 00:20:30,763 --> 00:20:31,903 I forgot to do this. 531 00:20:33,632 --> 00:20:34,632 Oh, um... 532 00:20:34,634 --> 00:20:37,236 is it okay if I kiss you? 533 00:20:37,237 --> 00:20:38,637 - Okay. 534 00:20:40,440 --> 00:20:42,770 - Hey, everyone, Bo and I just want to say thanks 535 00:20:42,775 --> 00:20:44,875 for making our wedding so dope. 536 00:20:44,877 --> 00:20:48,777 Oh, and shout-out to Boonville Women's Correctional Facility 537 00:20:48,781 --> 00:20:51,481 for letting my mom Skype in during the ceremony. 538 00:20:51,484 --> 00:20:52,784 - Where's Jeff? 539 00:20:52,785 --> 00:20:57,485 - To see the love in here and have my work family 540 00:20:57,490 --> 00:20:59,620 and my real family and my friend family 541 00:20:59,626 --> 00:21:00,856 and my mall family and... 542 00:21:00,860 --> 00:21:03,490 To piggyback on Cheyenne, 543 00:21:03,496 --> 00:21:05,356 at Cloud 9, we're not just coworkers. 544 00:21:05,365 --> 00:21:06,855 We're a family. 545 00:21:06,866 --> 00:21:10,866 Jeff, please don't make me fire my family! 37072

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.