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1
00:00:02,436 --> 00:00:03,796
- So, Bo,
what makes you interested
2
00:00:04,438 --> 00:00:06,208
in a career at Cloud 9?
3
00:00:06,240 --> 00:00:07,210
- Money.
4
00:00:07,241 --> 00:00:09,311
- Oh, sure, sure... money.
5
00:00:09,343 --> 00:00:11,083
- We've got the baby,
and, you know,
6
00:00:11,112 --> 00:00:14,282
we're saving up for a wedding,
and it's really expensive.
7
00:00:14,315 --> 00:00:16,575
Our theme is "Sick as Hell."
- Oh.
8
00:00:16,617 --> 00:00:18,447
- Or maybe it's gonna be
"Dope as Ass."
9
00:00:18,486 --> 00:00:20,046
We're still kinda
deciding on that,
10
00:00:20,088 --> 00:00:21,598
you know what I'm saying?
But together.
11
00:00:21,622 --> 00:00:22,892
- Aww.
Okay, well,
12
00:00:22,923 --> 00:00:25,533
why don't you tell me a little
bit about your work experience?
13
00:00:25,559 --> 00:00:27,559
On your application,
you said, uh,
14
00:00:27,595 --> 00:00:29,825
"DJ, player's player,"
15
00:00:29,863 --> 00:00:32,533
and you drew a picture
of a skateboard.
16
00:00:32,566 --> 00:00:34,336
- Yeah, that's my tag.
It's what up.
17
00:00:34,368 --> 00:00:36,838
- Bo doesn't have a lot
of work experience,
18
00:00:36,870 --> 00:00:39,340
but he's a great dad...
- Yeah.
19
00:00:39,373 --> 00:00:41,143
- And he's good with people.
20
00:00:41,175 --> 00:00:43,535
- Yo, and I roll
the fattest Js, so...
21
00:00:43,577 --> 00:00:47,317
- Okay, uh, where do you see
yourself in the future?
22
00:00:47,348 --> 00:00:48,818
- Future... okay.
So for real,
23
00:00:48,849 --> 00:00:50,527
I've given this actually,
like, a lot of thought.
24
00:00:50,551 --> 00:00:52,221
It's like,
there's no government,
25
00:00:52,253 --> 00:00:54,293
there's no laws,
and I'm the head of, like,
26
00:00:54,322 --> 00:00:56,422
this roving murder gang
kinda thing,
27
00:00:56,457 --> 00:00:58,527
but my best friend is a robot.
28
00:00:58,559 --> 00:01:03,659
- He means... where do you see
yourself at Cloud 9?
29
00:01:03,697 --> 00:01:05,567
- Oh...
yo, I'm not in this
30
00:01:05,599 --> 00:01:07,177
for long term at all,
you know what I'm saying?
31
00:01:07,201 --> 00:01:08,845
I'm just here to make
some paper, then bounce.
32
00:01:08,869 --> 00:01:10,139
Yo, but don't tell that
33
00:01:10,171 --> 00:01:12,471
to the bozos
in charge of hiring.
34
00:01:12,506 --> 00:01:15,136
- Um, Glenn is
in charge of hiring.
35
00:01:15,176 --> 00:01:16,176
- Oh, cool, okay.
36
00:01:16,210 --> 00:01:18,150
Yeah, I'm here
for a long time, so...
37
00:01:21,182 --> 00:01:22,582
*
38
00:01:22,616 --> 00:01:25,586
- Okay, let's give
a warm first-day welcome
39
00:01:25,619 --> 00:01:28,359
to our newest employee,
Bo Thompson...
40
00:01:28,389 --> 00:01:30,189
- What's up?
41
00:01:30,224 --> 00:01:33,464
- Who apparently wasn't
filled in about the dress code.
42
00:01:33,494 --> 00:01:35,664
- Why does his middle finger
look so weird?
43
00:01:35,696 --> 00:01:38,326
Oh, it's a penis.
Ha, clever.
44
00:01:38,366 --> 00:01:40,426
- Bo, maybe you should change.
45
00:01:40,468 --> 00:01:41,398
- Change into what?
46
00:01:41,435 --> 00:01:43,135
Where am I supposed to
find another shirt?
47
00:01:43,171 --> 00:01:44,541
- We work in a store.
48
00:01:44,572 --> 00:01:46,142
- Okay, moving on.
49
00:01:46,174 --> 00:01:49,484
Uh, today, we're gonna be
spring cleaning,
50
00:01:49,510 --> 00:01:52,310
which is gonna be
buckets of fun.
51
00:01:55,616 --> 00:01:57,316
What?
That's... that was funny.
52
00:01:57,351 --> 00:01:58,251
- No, it wasn't.
53
00:01:58,286 --> 00:02:00,416
- Literally nobody laughed,
except for you.
54
00:02:00,454 --> 00:02:01,424
- It's barely even wordplay.
55
00:02:01,455 --> 00:02:03,415
He just said buckets,
and held up a bucket.
56
00:02:03,457 --> 00:02:05,627
- It's called prop comedy, Dina.
57
00:02:05,659 --> 00:02:06,736
- You're just kissing up to him,
58
00:02:06,760 --> 00:02:08,360
'cause you're dating
his daughter.
59
00:02:08,396 --> 00:02:10,374
- That's not true at all.
In fact, just this morning,
60
00:02:10,398 --> 00:02:12,928
Kristen said she respects
how much I don't kiss up.
61
00:02:12,966 --> 00:02:15,936
- Where did you see Kristen
this morning?
62
00:02:15,969 --> 00:02:17,469
- Hm?
63
00:02:17,505 --> 00:02:21,505
We, uh, met for breakfast.
64
00:02:21,542 --> 00:02:25,252
- Wait, I'm confused,
'cause it's 6:30 right now.
65
00:02:25,279 --> 00:02:27,719
So does that mean you got up
and drove from your house,
66
00:02:27,748 --> 00:02:29,518
and she got up
and drove from her house
67
00:02:29,550 --> 00:02:32,190
to meet for breakfast
before 6:00 a.m.?
68
00:02:32,220 --> 00:02:33,390
- That's what happened.
69
00:02:33,421 --> 00:02:37,261
- And what restaurant is open
at, like, 4:00 in the morning?
70
00:02:37,291 --> 00:02:39,391
- It was a gas station.
71
00:02:39,427 --> 00:02:41,357
- Gas station breakfast
usually starts at 6:00.
72
00:02:41,395 --> 00:02:43,540
Was this BP or Mobil?
- Oh, I don't... I don't remember.
73
00:02:43,564 --> 00:02:45,304
- Nah, fools, they're banging.
74
00:02:45,333 --> 00:02:46,476
You know what I'm saying?
- Oh.
75
00:02:46,500 --> 00:02:47,944
- He's getting
a little breakfast action.
76
00:02:47,968 --> 00:02:48,968
Yeah.
77
00:02:50,338 --> 00:02:52,208
- * Let's go
78
00:02:52,240 --> 00:02:53,270
- * Duke gonna get 'em
79
00:02:53,307 --> 00:02:54,277
- * Go get 'em Duke
80
00:02:54,308 --> 00:02:55,278
- * Duke gonna get 'em
81
00:02:55,309 --> 00:02:56,309
- * Let's go
82
00:02:56,344 --> 00:02:57,654
* Get loose go ahead and do it *
83
00:02:57,678 --> 00:02:58,648
* Hold up wait a minute
84
00:02:58,679 --> 00:02:59,949
* Let me get into it
85
00:02:59,980 --> 00:03:01,680
* Get loose go ahead and do it *
86
00:03:01,715 --> 00:03:02,675
* Hold up wait a minute
87
00:03:02,716 --> 00:03:04,286
* Let me get into it
88
00:03:04,318 --> 00:03:07,588
- Wow, someone just
never picked up their photos.
89
00:03:07,621 --> 00:03:09,561
What do we do?
Do we just toss them?
90
00:03:09,590 --> 00:03:12,290
- Uh, well, first,
we look for any naked pictures,
91
00:03:12,326 --> 00:03:14,426
and I will be doing that.
92
00:03:14,462 --> 00:03:16,402
Dressed, dressed...
93
00:03:16,430 --> 00:03:18,000
- Hey, Glenn.
- Dressed.
94
00:03:18,031 --> 00:03:20,731
Landscape.
Dressed.
95
00:03:20,768 --> 00:03:22,968
- Do you feel good
about how that just went?
96
00:03:23,003 --> 00:03:23,843
- I don't get it.
97
00:03:23,871 --> 00:03:25,641
Normally, my girlfriends'
dads love me.
98
00:03:25,673 --> 00:03:27,413
I still keep in touch
with most of them.
99
00:03:27,441 --> 00:03:29,711
I just took Naomi's dad
to a train museum.
100
00:03:29,743 --> 00:03:32,613
- Oh, here we go.
Nope, that's just two peaches.
101
00:03:33,681 --> 00:03:36,421
- Jonah, relax.
Glenn likes you.
102
00:03:36,450 --> 00:03:38,320
- Yeah, but he doesn't
seemed jazzed, you know.
103
00:03:38,352 --> 00:03:40,492
I want him...
I want him to be jazzed.
104
00:03:40,521 --> 00:03:42,791
- Just stop trying so hard.
105
00:03:42,823 --> 00:03:45,593
Eventually, he'll be...
I'm not gonna say jazzed.
106
00:03:45,626 --> 00:03:47,256
He's... he's gonna be fine
with it.
107
00:03:47,295 --> 00:03:49,306
- Does that look like
a piece of a butt to you guys?
108
00:03:49,330 --> 00:03:51,030
- There's a lot of butts
on the Internet.
109
00:03:51,064 --> 00:03:52,374
Have you tried looking there?
110
00:03:52,400 --> 00:03:54,600
- It's too easy.
I like the hunt.
111
00:03:54,635 --> 00:03:56,735
- You just scan the barcode,
112
00:03:56,770 --> 00:04:00,340
and it shows you how many units
we have in inventory.
113
00:04:00,374 --> 00:04:04,354
- Ha! Oh, yo, Cheyenne to
the boneyard immediately STAT.
114
00:04:04,378 --> 00:04:05,278
Ha-ha, yeah.
- Charming.
115
00:04:05,313 --> 00:04:06,756
Can we just get back
to the scanning, though?
116
00:04:06,780 --> 00:04:09,020
- Oh, I'll get back to it.
Boom! Headshot.
117
00:04:09,049 --> 00:04:10,479
- Stop!
- One shot, one kill.
118
00:04:10,518 --> 00:04:11,761
- Would you...
- Pew-pew-pew-pew-pew-pew-pew.
119
00:04:11,785 --> 00:04:13,062
- Do you wanna learn
this stuff or not?
120
00:04:13,086 --> 00:04:15,016
- What, this?
Psh, not really... no.
121
00:04:15,055 --> 00:04:16,833
I'm just here to make
a quick 5 Gs, and then bounce,
122
00:04:16,857 --> 00:04:18,502
you know what I'm saying?
How long is it gonna take?
123
00:04:18,526 --> 00:04:19,826
Like a week, or something?
124
00:04:22,796 --> 00:04:24,466
- Ha...
125
00:04:24,498 --> 00:04:26,428
All right, what's so funny?
What, somebody fart?
126
00:04:26,467 --> 00:04:28,567
- Oh.
Hey, Myrtle.
127
00:04:28,602 --> 00:04:30,642
You've been here for 30 years?
- Yep.
128
00:04:30,671 --> 00:04:32,341
- Okay, how much money
have you saved?
129
00:04:32,373 --> 00:04:33,843
- Almost $900.
130
00:04:33,874 --> 00:04:37,384
I'm almost ready to head on out
to California.
131
00:04:39,413 --> 00:04:41,853
- I feel like I know this girl.
132
00:04:41,882 --> 00:04:44,452
Or maybe she worked here.
133
00:04:44,485 --> 00:04:46,315
- Oh, yeah,
she does look familiar.
134
00:04:46,354 --> 00:04:49,764
I was just focused on
the neck down before, so...
135
00:04:49,790 --> 00:04:52,390
- Hey, Tate,
do you recognize this girl?
136
00:04:52,426 --> 00:04:54,671
Like, maybe she worked here in
the last ten years or something.
137
00:04:54,695 --> 00:04:55,595
- Hm.
138
00:04:55,629 --> 00:04:57,469
Oh, yeah, was the the one
on fluoxetine?
139
00:04:57,498 --> 00:04:58,468
No.
140
00:04:58,499 --> 00:04:59,469
That was Carol.
141
00:04:59,500 --> 00:05:01,400
Oh, maybe lithium.
142
00:05:01,435 --> 00:05:02,795
No.
143
00:05:02,836 --> 00:05:03,996
No, that was also Carol.
144
00:05:04,037 --> 00:05:06,837
Yeah, Carol is what we in
the medical profession call a...
145
00:05:06,874 --> 00:05:09,414
Cuckoo.
146
00:05:09,443 --> 00:05:11,813
- You can just say no.
- Yeah, no, I don't know her.
147
00:05:11,845 --> 00:05:13,645
Ooh, hey, let me know
when you need, uh,
148
00:05:13,681 --> 00:05:16,081
refills on that skin stuff.
149
00:05:16,116 --> 00:05:19,686
- Um, no... you were thinking
of Carol.
150
00:05:19,720 --> 00:05:22,420
He's thinking of Carol.
- Mm.
151
00:05:22,456 --> 00:05:24,456
- You can't give up
on your first day.
152
00:05:24,492 --> 00:05:26,692
Just give it
a little bit more time, okay?
153
00:05:26,727 --> 00:05:28,472
- It's like... how are they gonna
pay us so little
154
00:05:28,496 --> 00:05:30,126
for all this work
we're doing, huh?
155
00:05:30,163 --> 00:05:32,473
- Cheyenne, I have your change.
156
00:05:35,403 --> 00:05:36,703
Great.
157
00:05:36,737 --> 00:05:39,467
$100, $200, $300, $400...
158
00:05:39,507 --> 00:05:40,837
Keep on spending, sheep.
159
00:05:40,874 --> 00:05:44,554
$500, $600, $700, $800...
160
00:05:44,578 --> 00:05:45,848
- Hey, Glenn.
- Oh.
161
00:05:45,879 --> 00:05:47,749
- Brought you a cup of joe.
162
00:05:47,781 --> 00:05:49,551
Coffee... cup of joe.
163
00:05:49,583 --> 00:05:50,827
You've never heard
that expression before?
164
00:05:50,851 --> 00:05:53,421
- No, why wouldn't
you just say coffee?
165
00:05:53,454 --> 00:05:57,434
- I don't know.
Uh, it's more fun?
166
00:05:57,458 --> 00:05:58,858
- Oh... oh, okay.
167
00:05:58,892 --> 00:06:00,732
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
168
00:06:00,761 --> 00:06:02,661
Oh, it's black.
- Oh, yeah, sorry.
169
00:06:02,696 --> 00:06:03,926
I didn't know how you took it.
170
00:06:03,964 --> 00:06:06,604
- It's fine, it's fine.
171
00:06:08,436 --> 00:06:09,466
Yeah, it's fine.
172
00:06:09,503 --> 00:06:11,813
- So, what's going on?
What's up?
173
00:06:11,839 --> 00:06:13,909
- Um... uh, nothing.
174
00:06:13,941 --> 00:06:15,781
Well, I was just
about to eat lunch.
175
00:06:15,809 --> 00:06:18,579
- Oh, no kidding, I was just
about to eat my lunch too
176
00:06:18,612 --> 00:06:20,952
at, uh, 10:30.
177
00:06:20,981 --> 00:06:23,851
How 'bout we, uh... how about
we eat together, you know?
178
00:06:23,884 --> 00:06:25,894
- You wanna eat lunch with me?
- Yeah!
179
00:06:25,919 --> 00:06:27,759
Yeah, it'll give us
a chance to talk, you know,
180
00:06:27,788 --> 00:06:29,618
get to know each other.
It'll be fun.
181
00:06:29,657 --> 00:06:31,427
- Okay.
182
00:06:31,459 --> 00:06:33,929
Let me... let me just
finish this coffee.
183
00:06:36,497 --> 00:06:38,767
- You know, you don't
have to finish that.
184
00:06:38,799 --> 00:06:39,729
- No, I love it.
185
00:06:39,767 --> 00:06:42,767
- If... if you don't,
it's not gonna offend me.
186
00:06:47,875 --> 00:06:48,875
- Um...
187
00:06:50,478 --> 00:06:52,078
I'll have a hot dog.
188
00:06:52,112 --> 00:06:53,982
- Sorry, we don't have hot dogs.
189
00:06:54,014 --> 00:06:55,484
- Cheeseburger then.
190
00:06:55,516 --> 00:06:57,646
- We only really serve
Mexican food.
191
00:06:57,685 --> 00:06:59,615
- One Mexican cheeseburger.
192
00:06:59,653 --> 00:07:03,063
- We'll have
two beef quesadillas, please.
193
00:07:03,090 --> 00:07:04,690
- You got it.
194
00:07:04,725 --> 00:07:06,655
- Quesadilla?
- Mm-hmm.
195
00:07:06,694 --> 00:07:08,534
- Quesadilla.
196
00:07:09,597 --> 00:07:11,097
It's colorful in here.
197
00:07:11,131 --> 00:07:12,071
Yeah.
198
00:07:12,099 --> 00:07:15,069
- This is fun.
Why haven't we done this before?
199
00:07:15,102 --> 00:07:17,512
- You know what, I don't know.
It's... it's really nice
200
00:07:17,538 --> 00:07:20,008
to get to know each other
outside of work.
201
00:07:20,040 --> 00:07:21,980
- Exactly.
202
00:07:22,009 --> 00:07:24,979
Ask me anything.
- Uh, okay.
203
00:07:25,012 --> 00:07:26,552
Where were you born?
204
00:07:26,580 --> 00:07:27,550
- Kansas City.
205
00:07:27,581 --> 00:07:28,551
- Oh.
206
00:07:28,582 --> 00:07:32,022
- Do Jewish people like snow?
207
00:07:32,052 --> 00:07:34,192
- Um... some of us.
208
00:07:34,221 --> 00:07:35,161
- Wow.
- Yeah.
209
00:07:35,188 --> 00:07:37,928
- Your turn.
- Uh, do you have any siblings?
210
00:07:37,958 --> 00:07:40,528
- Oh, what a strange question.
211
00:07:40,561 --> 00:07:43,101
Um, yeah, four.
212
00:07:43,130 --> 00:07:47,030
Uh, what's the biggest dog
you've ever seen, and why?
213
00:07:48,636 --> 00:07:51,536
- Okay, try Veronica Harris.
214
00:07:51,572 --> 00:07:53,772
She quit in 2011.
215
00:07:53,807 --> 00:07:56,537
- Veronica Harris.
216
00:07:56,577 --> 00:07:58,077
Oh, no,
it's definitely not Veronica.
217
00:07:58,111 --> 00:08:00,511
- Oh, Veronica.
218
00:08:00,548 --> 00:08:02,148
How is she doing?
219
00:08:02,182 --> 00:08:03,222
- Prison.
- What?
220
00:08:03,250 --> 00:08:04,720
Another one went to prison?
221
00:08:04,752 --> 00:08:08,222
- Yeah, we're kind of a feeder.
- Ugh, okay, um...
222
00:08:08,255 --> 00:08:11,685
try Robin Sanders.
223
00:08:11,725 --> 00:08:13,525
Ooh, no.
224
00:08:13,561 --> 00:08:15,531
- Not Robin.
Meth hit her hard.
225
00:08:15,563 --> 00:08:17,973
- God, why do people do it?
226
00:08:17,998 --> 00:08:21,098
- My guess... it feels incredible.
227
00:08:21,134 --> 00:08:23,144
- Yo, let's say, like,
someone, like, got in here
228
00:08:23,170 --> 00:08:25,210
and took all that oxi,
and, like, got out.
229
00:08:25,238 --> 00:08:27,316
How do they, like, move that,
you know what I'm saying?
230
00:08:27,340 --> 00:08:29,240
- Easy, you just go to
the nearest playground,
231
00:08:29,276 --> 00:08:31,606
and just sell the whole stash
to some rich moms.
232
00:08:31,645 --> 00:08:33,575
Yeah, all that pressure
to get their bods back
233
00:08:33,614 --> 00:08:36,584
after pregnancy...
It's gotta go somewhere, huh?
234
00:08:39,286 --> 00:08:41,556
My marriage is over.
235
00:08:43,223 --> 00:08:45,233
They're deeply unhappy.
- Bo, um...
236
00:08:45,258 --> 00:08:48,328
you're not assigned to pharmacy.
What are you doing here?
237
00:08:48,361 --> 00:08:50,106
- Oh, no reason.
I'm just hanging with my boy.
238
00:08:50,130 --> 00:08:52,070
- Okay,
'cause it's a really good thing
239
00:08:52,099 --> 00:08:53,699
that you have this job,
240
00:08:53,734 --> 00:08:56,244
and I wouldn't want you
to mess it up.
241
00:08:56,269 --> 00:08:58,169
- No, don't worry, baby,
all right?
242
00:08:58,205 --> 00:09:00,335
Yo, thanks for the info, Dr. S.
- No problem.
243
00:09:00,373 --> 00:09:01,343
Uh...
244
00:09:01,374 --> 00:09:02,214
Real talk for a sec?
245
00:09:02,242 --> 00:09:06,012
- Yeah.
- I'm jealous of your mustache.
246
00:09:06,046 --> 00:09:08,616
- Blesses and riches.
247
00:09:08,649 --> 00:09:10,619
- This was fun.
- I know, right?
248
00:09:10,651 --> 00:09:12,121
I-I'm so glad we did this.
249
00:09:12,152 --> 00:09:13,752
- Me too.
- Dessert?
250
00:09:13,787 --> 00:09:19,287
- Uh, do you have
a Mexican version of a churro?
251
00:09:19,326 --> 00:09:21,626
- Um, I think we can put
something together for you.
252
00:09:21,662 --> 00:09:22,562
- You know what, actually, uh,
253
00:09:22,596 --> 00:09:24,156
I-I think we should
probably head back.
254
00:09:24,197 --> 00:09:26,267
My break just ended
five minutes ago.
255
00:09:26,299 --> 00:09:27,069
- Oh.
- Yeah.
256
00:09:27,100 --> 00:09:30,200
- Well, why don't
we call the boss?
257
00:09:30,237 --> 00:09:31,807
Hello, Glenn, it's Glenn.
258
00:09:31,839 --> 00:09:33,739
Can Jonah have
an extra long lunch?
259
00:09:33,774 --> 00:09:35,644
What, he can?
That's great.
260
00:09:35,676 --> 00:09:37,776
You're the best.
Bye.
261
00:09:37,811 --> 00:09:40,381
I'm Glenn... same Glenn.
I mean, I'm both Glenns.
262
00:09:40,413 --> 00:09:41,313
- Oh, okay.
263
00:09:41,348 --> 00:09:43,878
- Yeah, you know, Glenn,
I-I appreciate it,
264
00:09:43,917 --> 00:09:46,617
but if... if you make
an exception for me,
265
00:09:46,654 --> 00:09:48,194
and then the other
associates notice,
266
00:09:48,221 --> 00:09:49,661
they're probably
gonna get jealous,
267
00:09:49,690 --> 00:09:52,130
and it'll get weird, so...
268
00:09:52,159 --> 00:09:53,629
- I didn't think of it
like that.
269
00:09:53,661 --> 00:09:54,801
- I know.
If I could,
270
00:09:54,828 --> 00:09:56,098
I would hang out all day,
271
00:09:56,129 --> 00:09:58,129
but, you know, life.
272
00:09:58,165 --> 00:10:00,125
- Yeah, life.
273
00:10:00,167 --> 00:10:01,277
I'll get the check.
- All right.
274
00:10:01,301 --> 00:10:05,611
- Excuse me, sir, do you take
American dollars here?
275
00:10:07,174 --> 00:10:09,214
- Well, this has escalated.
276
00:10:09,242 --> 00:10:11,312
- I-I just feel like
there's gotta be something
277
00:10:11,344 --> 00:10:12,714
that tells us who she is,
278
00:10:12,746 --> 00:10:15,216
like a stack of mail
with an address on it,
279
00:10:15,248 --> 00:10:18,088
or... or... or... or like a...
A car with a license plate,
280
00:10:18,118 --> 00:10:19,248
and we can run the plate.
281
00:10:19,286 --> 00:10:20,886
- Okay, explain to me
the process
282
00:10:20,921 --> 00:10:23,161
by which we would run a plate.
283
00:10:23,190 --> 00:10:26,660
- We would call someone
on the force.
284
00:10:26,694 --> 00:10:27,764
- The force?
285
00:10:27,795 --> 00:10:29,425
- Yes, that is
what people call it.
286
00:10:29,462 --> 00:10:33,272
- Look, I am all for wasting
time on useless activities,
287
00:10:33,300 --> 00:10:35,870
but this is entering
Carol territory.
288
00:10:35,903 --> 00:10:37,713
- Look at that kitchen, Garrett.
289
00:10:37,738 --> 00:10:40,138
That's like a...
A million dollar kitchen.
290
00:10:40,173 --> 00:10:42,143
Aren't you the least bit curious
291
00:10:42,175 --> 00:10:44,235
about how someone
who used to work here
292
00:10:44,277 --> 00:10:46,177
ended up in a house like that?
293
00:10:46,213 --> 00:10:47,753
- Is that a solid oak table?
294
00:10:47,781 --> 00:10:49,381
- Looks like a solid oak table.
295
00:10:49,416 --> 00:10:53,146
- And a French press.
- That is a French press.
296
00:10:53,186 --> 00:10:55,156
Do you know how much
disposable time you need
297
00:10:55,188 --> 00:10:58,328
to make French press coffee?
Too much.
298
00:10:58,358 --> 00:11:00,828
- We're gonna need to
make these a lot bigger.
299
00:11:00,861 --> 00:11:01,961
- Yes.
300
00:11:04,998 --> 00:11:06,728
*
301
00:11:06,767 --> 00:11:08,397
- Hey, no one's allowed in here.
302
00:11:08,435 --> 00:11:11,135
- Yeah, I got... I got lost
and stuff, so...
303
00:11:11,171 --> 00:11:13,411
Oh, hey, this is, like,
real badass, you know.
304
00:11:13,440 --> 00:11:15,780
This is like CTU headquarters
or something.
305
00:11:15,809 --> 00:11:17,420
You're like Jack Bauer,
you know what I'm saying?
306
00:11:17,444 --> 00:11:18,354
I don't know that
307
00:11:18,378 --> 00:11:21,448
I could actually do everything
that he...
308
00:11:21,481 --> 00:11:23,881
You know what? No.
Accept the compliment.
309
00:11:23,917 --> 00:11:24,717
Thank you.
310
00:11:24,752 --> 00:11:25,929
- Yeah, you got a tough job,
for real.
311
00:11:25,953 --> 00:11:28,423
You know, there's, like, a lot
of dangerous people out there.
312
00:11:28,455 --> 00:11:31,155
You got gang bangers
running around, Slender Man.
313
00:11:31,191 --> 00:11:32,769
Whoa, oh, where is he?
You know what I'm saying?
314
00:11:32,793 --> 00:11:33,563
Oh, ISISes.
315
00:11:33,593 --> 00:11:35,433
- I worry about ISIS
all the time.
316
00:11:35,462 --> 00:11:37,772
You know, people spend so much
time watching the coasts.
317
00:11:37,798 --> 00:11:39,408
You know where
they're gonna strike first?
318
00:11:39,432 --> 00:11:41,472
Right here in the heartland.
319
00:11:41,501 --> 00:11:43,301
- Yeah, what's up, truth?
320
00:11:43,336 --> 00:11:44,447
So I'm, like, thinking, like,
321
00:11:44,471 --> 00:11:46,941
I wanna learn about all this,
you know what I'm saying?
322
00:11:46,974 --> 00:11:48,844
You know, like, the cameras
and the locks
323
00:11:48,876 --> 00:11:50,436
and the alarms and all that.
324
00:11:50,477 --> 00:11:52,877
- Fellow security buff, huh?
- Yeah.
325
00:11:52,913 --> 00:11:54,353
- Ha, who knew?
Here I thought
326
00:11:54,381 --> 00:11:56,281
you were nothing more
than a worthless dirt bag.
327
00:11:56,316 --> 00:11:58,986
- Nah, I contain multitudes, yo.
328
00:11:59,019 --> 00:12:00,989
- Hey, you wanted to see me?
329
00:12:01,021 --> 00:12:02,961
- I just talked to corporate,
and they said
330
00:12:02,990 --> 00:12:05,430
as long as I don't give you
a raise of any kind,
331
00:12:05,458 --> 00:12:07,528
I can make you my assistant.
332
00:12:07,560 --> 00:12:10,830
Now we get to hang out all day.
333
00:12:17,037 --> 00:12:20,937
- 11 Mississippi,
12 Mississippi, 13.
334
00:12:22,876 --> 00:12:24,976
Uh, he says to count to 13.
335
00:12:25,012 --> 00:12:27,382
He likes it more as a slurry.
336
00:12:27,414 --> 00:12:30,884
- So as his assistant,
do you have to wear the tie?
337
00:12:30,918 --> 00:12:32,848
- Uh, no.
338
00:12:32,886 --> 00:12:33,916
He... he said it... it...
339
00:12:33,954 --> 00:12:37,964
It makes it easier for
the two of us to play pranks.
340
00:12:37,991 --> 00:12:41,531
- Well, on the bright side,
he's now good and jazzed, yeah?
341
00:12:41,561 --> 00:12:43,001
- Yeah, yeah.
342
00:12:43,030 --> 00:12:44,930
- I just love the tie.
343
00:12:44,965 --> 00:12:47,325
It makes me so happy.
- Glad to hear that.
344
00:12:47,367 --> 00:12:49,997
- So are you
his assistant now forever?
345
00:12:50,037 --> 00:12:51,497
- No, no... no... no, just, like,
346
00:12:51,538 --> 00:12:54,038
until Kristen and I break up.
347
00:12:54,074 --> 00:12:55,884
- But what happens
if you guys get married?
348
00:12:55,909 --> 00:12:58,449
- Oh, well, then...
Well, then, uh...
349
00:12:58,478 --> 00:13:00,978
I guess until Glenn dies.
350
00:13:01,014 --> 00:13:02,884
- The tie just makes me
so happy, man.
351
00:13:02,916 --> 00:13:06,586
I mean, it's like you're
a little, tiny businessman.
352
00:13:06,619 --> 00:13:08,489
- Only about
half the cameras work.
353
00:13:08,521 --> 00:13:09,632
The rest are just deterrents.
354
00:13:09,656 --> 00:13:12,356
But the thieves don't know
where the blind spots are.
355
00:13:12,392 --> 00:13:14,092
- Oh, he's totally packing,
right?
356
00:13:14,127 --> 00:13:17,097
- Oh, no, no, Reggie can't hold
an actual weapon.
357
00:13:17,130 --> 00:13:19,430
And as a matter of fact,
between you and I,
358
00:13:19,466 --> 00:13:21,866
he's almost completely blind.
359
00:13:21,902 --> 00:13:24,542
- What do you think
is going on over there?
360
00:13:24,571 --> 00:13:26,371
- I don't know.
361
00:13:26,406 --> 00:13:28,136
Whoo!
God...
362
00:13:28,175 --> 00:13:30,605
why is that so satisfying?
363
00:13:34,081 --> 00:13:36,581
We're probably gonna have
364
00:13:36,616 --> 00:13:39,346
a lot of inside jokes,
aren't we?
365
00:13:39,386 --> 00:13:41,016
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
366
00:13:41,054 --> 00:13:43,464
What do you think
our first one should be?
367
00:13:45,092 --> 00:13:47,092
- I'm gonna go to
the men's room.
368
00:13:47,127 --> 00:13:49,127
- Me too!
Look at this.
369
00:13:49,162 --> 00:13:52,372
Our cycles are
synching up already.
370
00:13:53,166 --> 00:13:55,096
- Okay, that tree
outside the window...
371
00:13:55,135 --> 00:13:56,095
It's a sycamore tree.
372
00:13:56,136 --> 00:13:58,106
- Great, now all we need to know
373
00:13:58,138 --> 00:14:00,068
is where sycamore trees grow.
374
00:14:00,107 --> 00:14:01,007
- Okay, sycamores...
375
00:14:01,041 --> 00:14:02,518
They grow in
the Southern parts of Missouri.
376
00:14:02,542 --> 00:14:03,912
- Missouri.
377
00:14:03,944 --> 00:14:06,154
- Large swaths of
the Eastern Seaboard.
378
00:14:06,179 --> 00:14:09,479
There's no sycamores
on the West Coast.
379
00:14:09,516 --> 00:14:11,576
- Okay...
- Except for Washington state.
380
00:14:11,618 --> 00:14:14,988
And there's a large group
of them in Australia.
381
00:14:15,022 --> 00:14:16,992
- We got nothing.
382
00:14:17,024 --> 00:14:20,394
I don't get it.
Where do we know her from?
383
00:14:20,427 --> 00:14:23,157
- Which one goes where?
- I don't know.
384
00:14:23,196 --> 00:14:24,926
I couldn't find
the reference photos.
385
00:14:24,965 --> 00:14:27,125
- Did you check up your butt?
386
00:14:27,167 --> 00:14:29,067
- No.
387
00:14:33,040 --> 00:14:34,940
- You going yet?
- No, still not yet.
388
00:14:34,975 --> 00:14:37,005
- Oh.
- You know, I...
389
00:14:37,044 --> 00:14:39,214
I-I could probably meet you
back in the office.
390
00:14:39,246 --> 00:14:42,046
- Oh, I don't mind.
391
00:14:42,082 --> 00:14:43,652
Hey, what do you think about
392
00:14:43,683 --> 00:14:46,523
going to a baseball game
with me this weekend?
393
00:14:46,553 --> 00:14:48,093
- Yeah, that... I'd love that.
- Yeah?
394
00:14:48,121 --> 00:14:49,691
- Yeah.
Of course, you know,
395
00:14:49,722 --> 00:14:51,592
the other employees might think
396
00:14:51,624 --> 00:14:53,464
that you're playing
favorites, so...
397
00:14:53,493 --> 00:14:55,533
- We don't have to tell them.
398
00:14:55,562 --> 00:14:58,532
- Right, but then it gets,
you know, even weirder,
399
00:14:58,565 --> 00:15:00,065
because it's like...
Now we're lying,
400
00:15:00,100 --> 00:15:02,240
so it'd be... it'd be
a whole thing, trust me.
401
00:15:02,269 --> 00:15:04,169
- Yeah, you're probably right.
402
00:15:06,739 --> 00:15:08,139
Boy, when you finally go,
403
00:15:08,175 --> 00:15:09,685
it's really gonna be something,
isn't it?
404
00:15:09,709 --> 00:15:11,439
Yeah.
405
00:15:12,545 --> 00:15:14,105
- Hey, Dina.
406
00:15:14,147 --> 00:15:15,677
How are things going with Bo?
407
00:15:15,715 --> 00:15:17,985
Uh, is he doing okay?
408
00:15:18,018 --> 00:15:20,218
- Doing okay?
He's a surv-head.
409
00:15:20,253 --> 00:15:21,693
Sorry, surveillance head.
410
00:15:21,721 --> 00:15:23,091
I forgot you weren't
a surv-head.
411
00:15:23,123 --> 00:15:24,993
- Oh.
Okay.
412
00:15:25,025 --> 00:15:29,225
Um, but is he, like, acting
a little weird around you?
413
00:15:29,262 --> 00:15:31,202
- You mean how he wants to
have sex with me?
414
00:15:31,231 --> 00:15:33,131
- Uh...
- Listen, relax, okay?
415
00:15:33,166 --> 00:15:35,096
I'm not interested.
Not enough body hair.
416
00:15:35,135 --> 00:15:36,495
He looks like a newborn mouse.
417
00:15:36,536 --> 00:15:38,706
- Oh... okay, good.
418
00:15:38,738 --> 00:15:41,568
- You should really have
a little more trust in your man.
419
00:15:41,608 --> 00:15:43,238
- Yeah.
420
00:15:43,276 --> 00:15:45,676
You're right.
I should trust him.
421
00:15:45,712 --> 00:15:47,252
Thanks.
422
00:15:48,748 --> 00:15:51,048
- And listen, if he masturbates
to me on his lunch break,
423
00:15:51,084 --> 00:15:52,624
that's his business, okay?
424
00:15:52,652 --> 00:15:54,052
It's not my fault.
425
00:15:54,087 --> 00:15:55,587
- Okay.
426
00:15:55,622 --> 00:15:58,062
- So corporate sent me
two tickets
427
00:15:58,091 --> 00:15:59,631
to this weekend's
Cardinals game,
428
00:15:59,659 --> 00:16:03,659
so I'm gonna pick
one employee to go with me...
429
00:16:03,696 --> 00:16:04,796
completely at random.
430
00:16:04,831 --> 00:16:08,671
So all your names are in here,
and it's time to pick now.
431
00:16:08,701 --> 00:16:11,041
- Is it Saturday or Sunday,
'cause I-I actually have...
432
00:16:11,071 --> 00:16:13,171
- It doesn't matter, Sandra.
433
00:16:13,206 --> 00:16:15,136
- I'm cremating my dog.
- Jonah!
434
00:16:15,175 --> 00:16:17,135
- You didn't even read it.
- I glanced at it.
435
00:16:17,177 --> 00:16:18,747
- I did not see you
glance at it.
436
00:16:18,778 --> 00:16:21,748
- Congratulations, Jonah!
Yeah!
437
00:16:21,781 --> 00:16:24,651
So, uh, if you, uh,
see us on the jumbotron,
438
00:16:24,684 --> 00:16:26,194
this is how that happened.
439
00:16:26,219 --> 00:16:27,563
- You know what,
I'm worried about traffic.
440
00:16:27,587 --> 00:16:29,232
Maybe you guys should
head down there early,
441
00:16:29,256 --> 00:16:30,616
and make a day out of it.
- Yeah.
442
00:16:30,657 --> 00:16:31,887
- That's a great idea.
443
00:16:31,924 --> 00:16:36,304
- Uh, yeah, you know what, uh,
I am all booked up this weekend.
444
00:16:36,329 --> 00:16:38,169
- Oh...
445
00:16:38,198 --> 00:16:41,328
well, I didn't literally mean,
like, this weekend.
446
00:16:41,368 --> 00:16:43,268
I-I meant, like, um,
447
00:16:43,303 --> 00:16:46,243
when this nearest weekend
is over, then that weekend.
448
00:16:46,273 --> 00:16:49,313
- Uh, oh, well, uh,
this is frustrating.
449
00:16:49,342 --> 00:16:51,312
I am booked up then too.
450
00:16:51,344 --> 00:16:53,784
- I'll go.
I love b-ball.
451
00:16:53,813 --> 00:16:56,083
- Oh, yeah, that's
what they call baseball.
452
00:16:56,116 --> 00:16:57,576
- No, nobody else is going.
453
00:16:57,617 --> 00:16:59,287
Jonah won,
so Jonah's coming with me.
454
00:16:59,319 --> 00:17:01,049
- No, Glenn, I did...
I didn't win.
455
00:17:01,088 --> 00:17:02,131
I... somebody else should...
- No, you won.
456
00:17:02,155 --> 00:17:03,799
- No, I didn't win... I clearly...
- Fair and square.
457
00:17:03,823 --> 00:17:05,234
- But I can't do it, Glenn.
- No, you...
458
00:17:05,258 --> 00:17:06,728
I'm sure you can
move stuff around.
459
00:17:06,759 --> 00:17:08,137
- I'm completely booked up,
and then I can't.
460
00:17:08,161 --> 00:17:09,372
I can't go.
- Winners go, losers don't go.
461
00:17:09,396 --> 00:17:11,156
- Glenn, I don't wanna
hang out with you.
462
00:17:15,102 --> 00:17:17,742
- All right, looks I'm in.
463
00:17:17,770 --> 00:17:18,940
Oh, one condition,
464
00:17:18,971 --> 00:17:23,341
uh, if I catch a foul ball,
I'm not giving it to a kid.
465
00:17:24,677 --> 00:17:25,677
- I respect that.
466
00:17:33,186 --> 00:17:37,286
- Uh, Glenn, I just came by to...
To return this.
467
00:17:37,324 --> 00:17:40,364
- Eugene?
- Thank you.
468
00:17:40,393 --> 00:17:42,333
Ahem, Glen?
- Thanks.
469
00:17:42,362 --> 00:17:45,272
I'll put this on
my new assistant.
470
00:17:45,298 --> 00:17:47,128
- Hey, so, listen,
471
00:17:47,167 --> 00:17:49,337
I'm sorry I lied about
wanting to hang out.
472
00:17:49,369 --> 00:17:51,569
Your breath is warm.
473
00:17:51,604 --> 00:17:55,144
- Uh, hey, Eugene, could...
Could we maybe have a minute?
474
00:17:55,175 --> 00:17:57,575
- Of course.
- Thanks.
475
00:17:58,878 --> 00:18:00,608
Glen, I, uh...
476
00:18:00,647 --> 00:18:02,817
I get that you felt weird
477
00:18:02,849 --> 00:18:04,549
about me dating Kristen,
478
00:18:04,584 --> 00:18:05,761
and... I don't know... I guess
I just thought
479
00:18:05,785 --> 00:18:09,685
if we spent some time together,
maybe I could win you over.
480
00:18:09,722 --> 00:18:11,392
- I get it.
481
00:18:11,424 --> 00:18:12,694
It's tricky.
482
00:18:12,725 --> 00:18:14,825
I mean,
you're dating my daughter,
483
00:18:14,861 --> 00:18:17,261
and I'm a strong alpha.
484
00:18:17,297 --> 00:18:18,827
- No, yeah, yeah, exactly.
485
00:18:18,865 --> 00:18:22,395
- But please, from now on,
just be honest with me.
486
00:18:22,435 --> 00:18:24,295
- Absolutely.
You have my word.
487
00:18:24,337 --> 00:18:25,537
- Okay.
488
00:18:25,572 --> 00:18:29,882
Hey, did Kristen sleep over
at your apartment last night?
489
00:18:31,311 --> 00:18:35,381
- No, we met for breakfast
at 4:00 a.m. at a gas station.
490
00:18:35,415 --> 00:18:37,915
- Thanks, that's what I thought.
491
00:18:38,818 --> 00:18:40,788
- Even if we never
find out who she is,
492
00:18:40,820 --> 00:18:42,720
isn't it nice to know
that at least one person
493
00:18:42,755 --> 00:18:44,355
who worked here
didn't end up on drugs,
494
00:18:44,391 --> 00:18:47,191
or in prison,
or fused to a couch?
495
00:18:47,227 --> 00:18:48,197
- Mm, the future is bright.
496
00:18:48,228 --> 00:18:51,658
- Yep, I can smell
the French press coffee now.
497
00:18:51,698 --> 00:18:53,268
- Eh, why wait?
498
00:18:53,300 --> 00:18:54,810
Don't we sell one of
those French presses
499
00:18:54,834 --> 00:18:55,874
here in the store?
500
00:18:57,737 --> 00:18:59,637
What?
501
00:18:59,672 --> 00:19:02,842
- She's a Cloud 9 model.
502
00:19:02,875 --> 00:19:04,675
- Yep.
503
00:19:04,711 --> 00:19:07,611
You still want to pick up
the French press?
504
00:19:07,647 --> 00:19:08,877
- Nope.
505
00:19:08,915 --> 00:19:11,875
- You know, I do think I have
seen that woman naked, though.
506
00:19:11,918 --> 00:19:14,648
- Yeah, you think
you've seen everyone naked.
507
00:19:15,488 --> 00:19:17,358
- I can't believe I doubted him.
508
00:19:17,390 --> 00:19:20,190
I mean, he's the father
of my child.
509
00:19:20,227 --> 00:19:22,697
- Do you think this is
chocolate sauce or blood?
510
00:19:22,729 --> 00:19:24,229
- Chocolate.
511
00:19:24,264 --> 00:19:25,834
I mean, maybe something's
wrong with me.
512
00:19:25,865 --> 00:19:27,895
Maybe I can't trust
the people in my life,
513
00:19:27,934 --> 00:19:29,774
because of my relationship
with my dad.
514
00:19:29,802 --> 00:19:32,172
- Um, Cheyenne...
515
00:19:38,411 --> 00:19:39,851
- Yep, it is blood.
516
00:19:41,414 --> 00:19:43,924
- Whoa.
Oh, hey, boo.
517
00:19:43,950 --> 00:19:45,490
I can't believe you.
518
00:19:45,518 --> 00:19:47,430
- What? No, no, no,
it's not what you think, okay?
519
00:19:47,454 --> 00:19:49,298
I was just gonna hide out here
until the store closes,
520
00:19:49,322 --> 00:19:50,692
and then I was gonna
rob the place.
521
00:19:50,723 --> 00:19:52,733
- That is what I thought
you were doing!
522
00:19:52,759 --> 00:19:55,459
- Wow, you know,
I love how you know me so well.
523
00:19:55,495 --> 00:19:57,825
- We could probably both
get fired from you doing this.
524
00:19:57,864 --> 00:20:00,404
Did you even realize
how this would affect me?
525
00:20:00,433 --> 00:20:02,003
- Yeah, I was doing this
for you, okay?
526
00:20:02,034 --> 00:20:03,804
So our wedding would be
sick as hell.
527
00:20:03,836 --> 00:20:06,336
It would have, like,
peacocks and Flo Rida
528
00:20:06,373 --> 00:20:08,013
and dope-ass peonies.
529
00:20:08,040 --> 00:20:10,240
- I don't need all that.
530
00:20:10,277 --> 00:20:11,207
- Really?
531
00:20:11,244 --> 00:20:12,884
- Let's just have
a nice, simple wedding,
532
00:20:12,912 --> 00:20:14,382
and then we save up our money,
533
00:20:14,414 --> 00:20:17,024
we can spend it on
something important,
534
00:20:17,049 --> 00:20:20,749
like one of those Jacuzzis
with the purple lights,
535
00:20:20,787 --> 00:20:24,357
or those gold teeth
that you've always wanted.
536
00:20:24,391 --> 00:20:27,291
- Damn, girl,
you're too good for me.
537
00:20:27,327 --> 00:20:28,897
- Totally.
538
00:20:32,299 --> 00:20:34,529
- Attention,
y'all are bitch ass hoes.
539
00:20:34,567 --> 00:20:35,567
I quit!
540
00:20:38,305 --> 00:20:40,305
I'm keeping the vest.
- Oh, no, you're not.
541
00:20:40,340 --> 00:20:41,450
- No, no,
okay, hold on, hold on.
542
00:20:41,474 --> 00:20:42,884
Just let... let me get if off!
543
00:20:42,909 --> 00:20:44,939
Putting it down, boss.
544
00:20:44,977 --> 00:20:47,447
Oh! Just kidding!
Suck it!
545
00:20:47,480 --> 00:20:49,950
Oh!
546
00:20:49,982 --> 00:20:52,522
I quit.
Did you hear that?
547
00:20:56,389 --> 00:20:58,329
- Glenn Sturgis's office?
548
00:20:58,358 --> 00:21:00,788
Hi, Jeff, let me see
if I can get him for you.
549
00:21:00,827 --> 00:21:02,897
I have Jeff for you.
- Thank you.
550
00:21:05,898 --> 00:21:08,938
Hi, Jeff.
- Hey, I have some bad news.
551
00:21:08,968 --> 00:21:10,798
Uh, the headline is every branch
552
00:21:10,837 --> 00:21:13,437
is gonna have to lay off
10% of its workforce.
553
00:21:13,473 --> 00:21:16,343
So... um...
554
00:21:16,376 --> 00:21:18,446
Should I go tell everybody?
40521
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