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1
00:00:01,102 --> 00:00:01,242
.
2
00:00:02,703 --> 00:00:03,543
[all clapping]
- All right, I like this.
3
00:00:05,239 --> 00:00:07,039
When I say cloud, you say nine.
Cloud.
4
00:00:07,041 --> 00:00:08,141
all: Nine.
- Cloud.
5
00:00:08,142 --> 00:00:10,212
all: Nine.
- When I say team, you say work.
6
00:00:10,211 --> 00:00:11,951
Team! Team!
all: Work. Work.
7
00:00:11,945 --> 00:00:13,945
- Are we cloud one?
all: No!
8
00:00:13,947 --> 00:00:15,317
- Are we cloud two?
all: No!
9
00:00:15,316 --> 00:00:16,776
- Are we cloud three?
all: No!
10
00:00:16,784 --> 00:00:18,024
- Are we cloud--
11
00:00:18,018 --> 00:00:20,218
- This chant seems a little
on the long side.
12
00:00:20,221 --> 00:00:21,361
- Gets longer every year.
13
00:00:21,355 --> 00:00:22,715
- When I first started here,
we would just
14
00:00:22,723 --> 00:00:24,533
put our hands
in the middle and go, "Yay."
15
00:00:24,525 --> 00:00:25,885
all:
No!
16
00:00:25,893 --> 00:00:27,233
- Are we Cloud 9?
17
00:00:27,228 --> 00:00:28,698
all:
Yeah!
18
00:00:28,696 --> 00:00:30,326
- Yeah!
19
00:00:30,331 --> 00:00:32,001
Yeah!
The customer's always right.
20
00:00:31,999 --> 00:00:33,129
all:
Oh, yeah!
21
00:00:33,134 --> 00:00:34,474
- They are not wrong.
all: Oh, yeah!
22
00:00:34,468 --> 00:00:35,968
- And that is why.
all: Oh, yeah!
23
00:00:35,969 --> 00:00:38,009
- We sing this song.
all: Oh, yeah!
24
00:00:38,005 --> 00:00:39,335
- We are!
25
00:00:39,340 --> 00:00:41,080
all:
Cloud 9.
26
00:00:41,075 --> 00:00:43,335
We are Cloud 9.
27
00:00:43,344 --> 00:00:44,554
[all whispering]
Eight, seven, six, five,
28
00:00:44,545 --> 00:00:45,845
four, three, two, one!
29
00:00:45,846 --> 00:00:48,576
[all yell]
Blast off!
30
00:00:48,582 --> 00:00:51,622
[all cheering]
31
00:00:54,122 --> 00:00:55,262
- Now give me a "C"!
32
00:00:55,256 --> 00:00:56,616
all:
C!
33
00:00:56,624 --> 00:00:59,634
[upbeat music]
34
00:00:59,627 --> 00:01:01,557
*
35
00:01:01,562 --> 00:01:04,132
- Before we open,
I need a volunteer
36
00:01:04,132 --> 00:01:06,232
to hand out samples
of the new
37
00:01:06,234 --> 00:01:09,944
Cloud 9 brand salsa,
Señor Cloud.
38
00:01:09,937 --> 00:01:11,537
- Yes, right here.
I'll do it.
39
00:01:11,539 --> 00:01:14,039
- Yes, perfect,
and I don't mean
40
00:01:14,041 --> 00:01:15,481
just because
you're Mexican.
41
00:01:15,476 --> 00:01:17,206
- I'm actually Filipino.
42
00:01:17,211 --> 00:01:20,151
- Okay, let's consider
all our options.
43
00:01:20,148 --> 00:01:25,248
Um, Amy, I've got a feeling
this is right up your alley.
44
00:01:25,253 --> 00:01:27,823
- Because I'm Latina?
45
00:01:27,821 --> 00:01:30,161
- No, it has nothing
to do with race.
46
00:01:30,158 --> 00:01:34,028
You just have a certain
natural spiciness.
47
00:01:34,027 --> 00:01:36,427
- [chuckles]
No.
48
00:01:36,430 --> 00:01:37,630
- Okay, you know, fine,
I'll just, uh,
49
00:01:37,631 --> 00:01:39,171
pick someone at random.
50
00:01:39,167 --> 00:01:40,567
Eeny, meeny, miney, mo.
51
00:01:40,568 --> 00:01:42,298
Jesus saved us long ago.
52
00:01:42,303 --> 00:01:43,843
Don't believe me,
what a shame.
53
00:01:43,837 --> 00:01:46,937
Judgment day
you'll be in flames.
54
00:01:46,940 --> 00:01:49,480
- The other Latina?
- What?
55
00:01:49,477 --> 00:01:50,777
- I could do it.
56
00:01:50,778 --> 00:01:52,908
- [laughs]
That'd be hilarious.
57
00:01:52,913 --> 00:01:55,723
You should dress
like a matador.
58
00:01:55,716 --> 00:01:57,846
- Honestly, it's fine.
59
00:01:57,851 --> 00:01:59,351
It beats a day of
dressing room duty.
60
00:01:59,353 --> 00:02:02,723
- Thank you.
Think fast!
61
00:02:02,723 --> 00:02:04,563
Mexico hat!
62
00:02:04,558 --> 00:02:06,528
- Attention,
Cloud 9 shoppers,
63
00:02:06,527 --> 00:02:07,927
be sure to stop by grocery
64
00:02:07,928 --> 00:02:10,828
for a free sample
of Señor Cloud salsa.
65
00:02:10,831 --> 00:02:13,601
And in pharmacy,
get yourself a flu shot,
66
00:02:13,601 --> 00:02:16,571
available in medium, mild,
ay-yi-yi picante,
67
00:02:16,570 --> 00:02:19,740
and I'm almost positive
that was written down wrong.
68
00:02:19,740 --> 00:02:21,910
[in thick accent]
- Yes, Señor Cloud salsa
69
00:02:21,909 --> 00:02:24,449
is very good for parties.
70
00:02:24,445 --> 00:02:25,875
- And there are
so many flavors.
71
00:02:25,879 --> 00:02:27,479
- She is from Kansas City.
72
00:02:27,481 --> 00:02:30,351
Why is she talking
like Speedy Gonzales?
73
00:02:30,351 --> 00:02:31,621
I should
say something to her.
74
00:02:31,619 --> 00:02:32,919
- Absolutely not.
75
00:02:32,920 --> 00:02:35,260
Do not get involved in things
that don't concern you.
76
00:02:35,256 --> 00:02:37,226
People here are quicksand.
They will suck you in.
77
00:02:37,225 --> 00:02:39,125
- So you're saying
never help anyone?
78
00:02:39,126 --> 00:02:41,596
- I'm saying don't help
anyone in this store.
79
00:02:41,595 --> 00:02:43,655
Within these walls,
helping is quicksand.
80
00:02:43,664 --> 00:02:45,434
- You know, it's funny
that you mention walls.
81
00:02:45,433 --> 00:02:48,843
Because that summer that I spent
doing Habitat for Humanity,
82
00:02:48,836 --> 00:02:50,366
I was literally building--
[both groan]
83
00:02:50,371 --> 00:02:51,771
What?
- You know,
84
00:02:51,772 --> 00:02:53,912
you find ways to work that
into conversation a lot.
85
00:02:53,907 --> 00:02:55,077
- Mm-hmm.
86
00:02:55,075 --> 00:02:56,305
- I try not to say words
like "hammer"
87
00:02:56,310 --> 00:02:57,910
or "roof" when I'm around you.
88
00:02:57,911 --> 00:02:59,851
- One time you got there
from Hugh Laurie.
89
00:02:59,847 --> 00:03:02,817
- Look, my point is, there are
people who do nothing
90
00:03:02,816 --> 00:03:04,716
and there are people
who do something,
91
00:03:04,718 --> 00:03:06,388
and I am one of those people.
92
00:03:06,387 --> 00:03:08,057
- Hmm.
93
00:03:08,055 --> 00:03:10,155
- The--the something group.
94
00:03:12,125 --> 00:03:14,025
Excuse me.
95
00:03:14,027 --> 00:03:17,967
Sir, is there something
I can help you with?
96
00:03:17,965 --> 00:03:21,265
- Really? Uh, wow, yes,
97
00:03:21,269 --> 00:03:23,469
uh, thank you so much.
98
00:03:23,471 --> 00:03:24,541
Oh, that's great.
99
00:03:24,538 --> 00:03:26,938
So, uh, just stack 'em
in the pharmacy,
100
00:03:26,940 --> 00:03:28,480
and then there's gonna be
a few more loads in the trucks.
101
00:03:28,476 --> 00:03:30,606
- Oh, there's more?
- Oh, so many more.
102
00:03:30,611 --> 00:03:32,981
- Okay.
- Guess I'm gonna grab a coffee.
103
00:03:32,980 --> 00:03:34,550
All right.
104
00:03:34,548 --> 00:03:36,048
- Have to have the salsa.
105
00:03:36,049 --> 00:03:37,419
Sometimes I like the tomatillo
106
00:03:37,418 --> 00:03:39,048
with the quesadilla,
but not all the time.
107
00:03:39,052 --> 00:03:41,722
- I'm gonna say something.
- Don't do it.
108
00:03:41,722 --> 00:03:44,492
- Now, just walk me
through some of the features
109
00:03:44,492 --> 00:03:45,962
on some of these guys.
110
00:03:45,959 --> 00:03:48,299
'Cause a lot of 'em are saying
they do plaque control.
111
00:03:48,296 --> 00:03:51,326
My concern,
specifically, is tartar.
112
00:03:51,332 --> 00:03:53,902
- Okay, well, um...
113
00:03:53,901 --> 00:03:56,501
- I'm a bit of a tartar guy.
114
00:03:56,504 --> 00:03:57,844
Yeah, my hygienist told me
115
00:03:57,838 --> 00:04:01,038
she'd never seen someone
with so much tartar.
116
00:04:01,041 --> 00:04:02,741
I thought that
was a good thing.
117
00:04:02,743 --> 00:04:04,753
Um, it's not.
118
00:04:04,745 --> 00:04:06,645
[exhales deeply]
119
00:04:06,647 --> 00:04:08,217
- Oh.
120
00:04:10,117 --> 00:04:12,317
- You know, you and me,
we're the same.
121
00:04:12,320 --> 00:04:14,320
Mm-hmm. Overachievers.
122
00:04:14,322 --> 00:04:16,522
- [chuckles] Yeah.
- Yeah, am I tough?
123
00:04:16,524 --> 00:04:19,964
Uh, yeah,
but I'm a pharmacist.
124
00:04:19,960 --> 00:04:22,330
I have to be tough,
or people die.
125
00:04:22,330 --> 00:04:25,770
They don't pay me
what they pay me to slack off.
126
00:04:26,867 --> 00:04:30,397
- All right, yeah.
127
00:04:30,404 --> 00:04:33,214
- It's $116,670 a year.
128
00:04:33,206 --> 00:04:34,676
- Oh, wow.
- [whistles]
129
00:04:34,675 --> 00:04:38,345
Yeah, so I'm doing
pretty well for myself.
130
00:04:38,346 --> 00:04:39,806
- Well, listen, uh,
if you need anything else
131
00:04:39,813 --> 00:04:40,983
you know where to find me.
132
00:04:40,981 --> 00:04:43,421
- Great, so grab some
alcohol wipes, bandages,
133
00:04:43,417 --> 00:04:44,717
and sterile gauze pads.
134
00:04:44,718 --> 00:04:47,048
Bring in the first patient
and prep him.
135
00:04:47,054 --> 00:04:48,864
Man, we got a long day
ahead of us.
136
00:04:51,392 --> 00:04:55,032
* Had the time of my life
137
00:04:55,028 --> 00:04:59,198
* Though I never felt
like this before *
138
00:04:59,199 --> 00:05:01,369
- Hey, you know
Glenn's not allowed
139
00:05:01,369 --> 00:05:03,139
to ask you to put on
that accent, right?
140
00:05:03,136 --> 00:05:04,606
I mean, I know
he's the manager,
141
00:05:04,605 --> 00:05:06,165
but it just means
he can use the bathroom
142
00:05:06,173 --> 00:05:07,443
without asking anyone.
143
00:05:07,441 --> 00:05:09,911
- No, I know that.
I decided on the accent.
144
00:05:09,910 --> 00:05:11,810
Oh my God, people love it.
145
00:05:11,812 --> 00:05:13,252
[in thick accent]
Hola, señorita,
146
00:05:13,246 --> 00:05:16,016
you want to make your day
a fiesta?
147
00:05:16,016 --> 00:05:18,546
- Sure.
Thank you.
148
00:05:18,552 --> 00:05:23,462
See?
- Yep, some people love it,
149
00:05:23,457 --> 00:05:26,187
and, uh, and some people
might find it offensive.
150
00:05:26,193 --> 00:05:29,303
- Offensive?
Like, who?
151
00:05:29,296 --> 00:05:31,126
- Oh, I don't know...
152
00:05:31,131 --> 00:05:33,671
maybe Latino people
who would think that
153
00:05:33,667 --> 00:05:35,137
you're exploiting
your heritage
154
00:05:35,135 --> 00:05:36,665
and demeaning yourself.
155
00:05:36,670 --> 00:05:37,840
- Okay, all right,
156
00:05:37,838 --> 00:05:40,108
I don't know who
made you Latino police,
157
00:05:40,107 --> 00:05:41,877
Amy, but I'm just
trying to sell salsa.
158
00:05:41,875 --> 00:05:43,575
- No, I am not policing you.
- Okay, if you could keep--
159
00:05:43,577 --> 00:05:46,007
- I'm merely suggesting that
maybe you don't need to resort--
160
00:05:46,013 --> 00:05:48,653
- Hola, señorita!
Como estas?
161
00:05:48,649 --> 00:05:50,519
- Ooh, is that
Mexican ketchup?
162
00:05:50,518 --> 00:05:52,088
- "Jess, es berry" good.
163
00:05:52,085 --> 00:05:54,315
- You mean,
"Yes, it's very good."
164
00:05:54,321 --> 00:05:55,921
- Oh, don't listen to her.
165
00:05:55,923 --> 00:05:57,693
You speak the language
beautifully.
166
00:05:57,691 --> 00:06:00,231
- Gracias, señorita.
167
00:06:00,227 --> 00:06:02,157
You want to try
something special?
168
00:06:02,162 --> 00:06:04,332
This is, cómo se dice,
pineapple.
169
00:06:04,331 --> 00:06:05,631
- Okay, you know what?
Stop.
170
00:06:05,633 --> 00:06:07,073
- No! You stop.
171
00:06:07,067 --> 00:06:08,237
- Talk
like a normal person!
172
00:06:08,235 --> 00:06:10,595
- Excuse me, miss,
but she is a normal person.
173
00:06:10,604 --> 00:06:12,614
- That's exactly
what I'm saying!
174
00:06:12,606 --> 00:06:14,206
- Ow! Damn it!
175
00:06:14,207 --> 00:06:16,877
Mother[bleep], Amy!
[Bleep], aye!
176
00:06:16,877 --> 00:06:18,507
What the [bleep]!
177
00:06:23,484 --> 00:06:23,624
.
178
00:06:24,752 --> 00:06:25,652
* Everybody's working
for the weekend *
179
00:06:29,322 --> 00:06:31,092
- This is what you get
when you've got weak joints.
180
00:06:31,091 --> 00:06:33,161
That's why I have a dedicated
ankle day at the gym.
181
00:06:33,160 --> 00:06:34,730
- I really am sorry,
Carmen.
182
00:06:34,728 --> 00:06:36,028
I-I-I feel awful.
183
00:06:36,029 --> 00:06:37,999
- Yeah, you should, Amy.
It was none of your business.
184
00:06:37,998 --> 00:06:39,368
- Well, just to clarify,
185
00:06:39,366 --> 00:06:41,126
uh, I feel awful
you hurt yourself.
186
00:06:41,134 --> 00:06:42,804
I still stand by
my comments.
187
00:06:42,803 --> 00:06:45,643
- Okay, there you go.
188
00:06:47,608 --> 00:06:49,378
Oh, and feel free
to take a water.
189
00:06:49,376 --> 00:06:51,546
I'm an Uber driver
in my spare time.
190
00:06:51,545 --> 00:06:53,345
- I'll put your stuff
in your locker for you.
191
00:06:53,346 --> 00:06:54,476
- And I already
clocked out for you,
192
00:06:54,482 --> 00:06:55,552
so you're not
gonna get paid
193
00:06:55,549 --> 00:06:56,719
for any of the time
you missed.
194
00:06:56,717 --> 00:06:58,217
Don't you worry
about that.
195
00:06:58,218 --> 00:07:00,088
- Are you sure I
can't drive her?
196
00:07:00,087 --> 00:07:02,557
- No, I've been meaning
to drop by the hospital anyway.
197
00:07:02,556 --> 00:07:04,826
I like staring
at the newborn babies
198
00:07:04,825 --> 00:07:06,485
until someone asks me to leave.
199
00:07:06,494 --> 00:07:07,834
Oh, but I do need someone
200
00:07:07,828 --> 00:07:10,698
to take over
the Señor Cloud salsa stand.
201
00:07:11,799 --> 00:07:13,899
Fine, I'll get somebody else.
202
00:07:13,901 --> 00:07:16,301
But it's a real shame,
because that sombrero
203
00:07:16,303 --> 00:07:18,413
really pops on darker skin.
204
00:07:19,907 --> 00:07:21,837
- Okay, so do you
have any questions
205
00:07:21,842 --> 00:07:23,282
about the hydrochlorothiazide?
206
00:07:23,276 --> 00:07:25,106
- No, uh,
could you also ring up
207
00:07:25,112 --> 00:07:26,382
a few other things
for me, please?
208
00:07:26,379 --> 00:07:29,719
- Sure, yeah.
209
00:07:29,717 --> 00:07:30,817
I have a doctorate in pharmacy,
210
00:07:30,818 --> 00:07:32,918
so this is a great use
of my time.
211
00:07:32,920 --> 00:07:35,090
I live to serve.
- Thank you.
212
00:07:35,088 --> 00:07:36,818
Bernice, he said it's fine.
213
00:07:36,824 --> 00:07:39,134
- Oh, God.
[mutters]
214
00:07:39,126 --> 00:07:41,186
[sighs]
One moment.
215
00:07:41,194 --> 00:07:43,364
Hey, J-dog,
I have to, uh,
216
00:07:43,363 --> 00:07:45,133
go do some
tranquility lunges,
217
00:07:45,132 --> 00:07:47,102
so could you give that guy
his shot for me?
218
00:07:48,669 --> 00:07:50,839
- Oh, no, I can't.
I'm not a pharmacist.
219
00:07:50,838 --> 00:07:53,038
- Yeah, and I'm not a clerk,
220
00:07:53,040 --> 00:07:56,310
but I guess the world's
all topsy-turvy today, isn't it?
221
00:07:56,309 --> 00:07:57,849
Just think!
222
00:07:59,547 --> 00:08:02,677
- I'm just basically looking
for an every day brush.
223
00:08:02,683 --> 00:08:04,693
Yeah, just kind of
that workhorse,
224
00:08:04,685 --> 00:08:05,985
you know, that's in
the collection.
225
00:08:05,986 --> 00:08:07,556
That I can know
I'm just gonna
226
00:08:07,555 --> 00:08:08,815
put in the minutes with.
227
00:08:08,822 --> 00:08:11,322
- [Mateo in thick accent]
Señor Cloud salsa...
228
00:08:11,324 --> 00:08:15,234
- Um, I'll be right back.
229
00:08:15,228 --> 00:08:16,428
- Uh, excuse me.
230
00:08:16,429 --> 00:08:20,669
I have some questions
about bristle density.
231
00:08:20,668 --> 00:08:23,338
- Yes, es bueno
por Cinco de Mayo,
232
00:08:23,336 --> 00:08:26,236
y quinceañeras,
la biblioteca.
233
00:08:26,239 --> 00:08:28,139
Hola.
234
00:08:28,141 --> 00:08:30,581
- Hey, what do you think
you're doing?
235
00:08:30,578 --> 00:08:33,948
- I--I am selling salsa
to support mi abuela.
236
00:08:33,947 --> 00:08:35,577
My burro has run away.
237
00:08:35,583 --> 00:08:39,493
- Right, uh, whatever
this is, Mateo, I--
238
00:08:39,486 --> 00:08:42,686
- No Mateo.
Soy Jose!
239
00:08:42,690 --> 00:08:45,960
Jose was born in
a small village near Oaxaca.
240
00:08:45,959 --> 00:08:47,829
- Okay, I get it.
241
00:08:47,828 --> 00:08:50,258
I get it, I get that it's fun
242
00:08:50,263 --> 00:08:52,033
to play make believe,
243
00:08:52,032 --> 00:08:55,272
but this is offensive.
244
00:08:55,268 --> 00:08:56,938
- Oh.
245
00:08:56,937 --> 00:08:59,637
Like, I am sorry.
I will "estop."
246
00:08:59,640 --> 00:09:02,080
- Yes, please stop.
247
00:09:02,075 --> 00:09:04,235
- I am trying to.
248
00:09:04,244 --> 00:09:05,454
- I'm not kidding.
249
00:09:05,445 --> 00:09:08,345
- Me neither.
It's like when I "estart"
250
00:09:08,348 --> 00:09:09,618
doing the accent
I cannot "estop."
251
00:09:11,518 --> 00:09:13,148
- That's an interesting tattoo.
252
00:09:13,153 --> 00:09:15,323
Is that a unicorn?
253
00:09:15,322 --> 00:09:16,622
- It's a horse
254
00:09:16,624 --> 00:09:19,064
with a railroad spike
through his head.
255
00:09:19,059 --> 00:09:21,229
- I see that now.
256
00:09:21,228 --> 00:09:23,698
It's not quite
as magical, but...
257
00:09:23,697 --> 00:09:24,797
- I think it's clean.
- Right.
258
00:09:24,798 --> 00:09:25,968
- Will you just give me
the shot already?
259
00:09:25,966 --> 00:09:27,636
- Yes, yes, yes,
yes, yes, yes.
260
00:09:27,635 --> 00:09:32,165
The shot which comes
out of this needle.
261
00:09:32,172 --> 00:09:35,382
Okay, uh, huh.
262
00:09:35,375 --> 00:09:36,635
Okay.
263
00:09:40,547 --> 00:09:43,677
I think this does something.
264
00:09:43,684 --> 00:09:45,154
Should I have a belt?
265
00:09:45,152 --> 00:09:48,262
- It's a tiny little needle,
all right? Just do it!
266
00:09:48,255 --> 00:09:51,055
- All right, uh, just,
uh, you know, breathe.
267
00:09:51,058 --> 00:09:53,088
Or count to ten
or something like that.
268
00:09:53,093 --> 00:09:56,463
And, uh, and away we go.
269
00:09:59,399 --> 00:10:01,199
- [whimpering]
270
00:10:01,201 --> 00:10:03,441
- I'm--I'm really sorry.
271
00:10:03,436 --> 00:10:05,006
Drink a lot of water.
272
00:10:05,005 --> 00:10:06,005
- Told you.
That's what happens
273
00:10:06,006 --> 00:10:08,406
when you try
to help people out.
274
00:10:09,643 --> 00:10:11,513
- What is that?
What are you doing?
275
00:10:11,511 --> 00:10:12,911
- That's quicksand.
276
00:10:12,913 --> 00:10:15,023
I'm dating this girl.
She teaches sign language.
277
00:10:15,015 --> 00:10:17,215
This is quicksand,
and this is you drowning in it.
278
00:10:17,217 --> 00:10:19,647
"Oh, I'm trying to help.
279
00:10:19,653 --> 00:10:21,863
I'm building houses
for poor people!"
280
00:10:21,855 --> 00:10:23,415
- Excuse me.
281
00:10:23,423 --> 00:10:26,263
Do you know how much
longer this is going to take?
282
00:10:26,259 --> 00:10:29,199
I don't know how long
I can keep standing.
283
00:10:29,196 --> 00:10:31,126
- Uh...
284
00:10:31,131 --> 00:10:33,131
[inaudible]
285
00:10:33,133 --> 00:10:36,043
You know what,
young lady?
286
00:10:36,036 --> 00:10:38,806
I'm sure there's a way that
we can help you out.
287
00:10:38,806 --> 00:10:40,466
Right this way.
288
00:10:40,473 --> 00:10:43,543
- Thank you!
Such a gentleman.
289
00:10:43,543 --> 00:10:45,483
- Hey, why does
she get to cut?
290
00:10:45,478 --> 00:10:48,518
- Because white people
help their own.
291
00:10:48,515 --> 00:10:51,345
[customers gasp]
292
00:10:52,452 --> 00:10:54,452
- It's like I forgot
how to "espeak."
293
00:10:54,454 --> 00:10:56,564
I cannot stop
playing the role.
294
00:10:56,556 --> 00:10:58,786
- It's not a role.
It's a stereotype.
295
00:10:58,792 --> 00:11:01,062
How would you feel
if I was handing out
296
00:11:01,061 --> 00:11:02,531
Asian food and I was all like,
297
00:11:02,529 --> 00:11:05,269
[in heavy accent] "Oh, eh,
me grow up on a rice patty.
298
00:11:05,265 --> 00:11:08,135
"Eh, pwease, it most honorable
teriyaki chicken.
299
00:11:08,135 --> 00:11:10,365
Uh, so, ching-chong."
300
00:11:14,074 --> 00:11:15,944
- [normal accent]
That would be messed up.
301
00:11:15,943 --> 00:11:18,983
- Nice work on those
spreadsheets, Laquisha.
302
00:11:18,979 --> 00:11:21,379
Racism, you hear
a lot about it,
303
00:11:21,381 --> 00:11:23,051
but what is it, really?
304
00:11:23,050 --> 00:11:24,550
Over the next 60 minutes...
305
00:11:24,551 --> 00:11:26,521
[all groaning]
306
00:11:26,519 --> 00:11:28,589
- We are gonna take a journey
through time and race.
307
00:11:28,588 --> 00:11:29,618
- Thanks a lot, guys.
308
00:11:29,622 --> 00:11:30,862
When I woke up
this morning,
309
00:11:30,858 --> 00:11:32,488
I was hoping to learn
about racism from a white lady.
310
00:11:36,797 --> 00:11:36,927
.
311
00:11:38,298 --> 00:11:39,198
- I need help with my
toothbrush selection.
312
00:11:41,434 --> 00:11:43,944
Toothbrushes.
313
00:11:43,937 --> 00:11:46,807
- * Boy, you really
got me going *
314
00:11:46,807 --> 00:11:48,177
- You work here?
315
00:11:48,175 --> 00:11:49,905
- Here's a riddle for you:
316
00:11:49,910 --> 00:11:51,780
what do Martin Luther King,
Malcolm X,
317
00:11:51,779 --> 00:11:54,279
and Nelson Mandela
all have in common?
318
00:11:54,281 --> 00:11:58,921
Answer: They were all prominent
African-American leaders.
319
00:11:58,919 --> 00:12:02,689
It's okay to goof around,
but you should never--
320
00:12:02,689 --> 00:12:05,059
- So how long
you been a racist?
321
00:12:05,058 --> 00:12:07,128
- Just today. You?
322
00:12:07,127 --> 00:12:08,527
- Me too.
323
00:12:08,528 --> 00:12:10,128
So far it's not really
working out for me.
324
00:12:10,130 --> 00:12:11,970
- Hmm.
- Because when we look
325
00:12:11,965 --> 00:12:15,535
past stereotypes,
we learn to appreciate
326
00:12:15,535 --> 00:12:18,205
all the colors of the cloud.
327
00:12:18,205 --> 00:12:20,335
- That sounds heavenly.
328
00:12:20,340 --> 00:12:23,840
- Oh, MC Cool Cloud,
you are too much.
329
00:12:23,844 --> 00:12:25,554
[MC Cool Cloud giggles]
330
00:12:27,547 --> 00:12:29,617
- Too much.
331
00:12:29,616 --> 00:12:32,986
- I think if there is any
takeaway from today, it's this:
332
00:12:32,986 --> 00:12:37,886
anyone can be a racist.
Anyone.
333
00:12:37,891 --> 00:12:38,961
- Okay, yes,
334
00:12:38,959 --> 00:12:41,129
I should not have done
that impression,
335
00:12:41,128 --> 00:12:44,728
but I want to be clear
that I was not being racist.
336
00:12:44,731 --> 00:12:48,641
I was making a comment
about racism.
337
00:12:48,635 --> 00:12:49,995
- Well, yes, personally
338
00:12:50,003 --> 00:12:51,503
I'm not a fan of
racist comments, so--
339
00:12:51,504 --> 00:12:52,674
- No, it's not what--
340
00:12:52,672 --> 00:12:55,312
I was exaggerating on purpose
to make a point.
341
00:12:55,308 --> 00:12:56,638
- Parody.
342
00:12:56,643 --> 00:12:58,613
She was making a joke
about racism.
343
00:12:58,611 --> 00:12:59,951
- Yes!
344
00:12:59,947 --> 00:13:01,347
- Well, are racist jokes
okay again?
345
00:13:01,348 --> 00:13:02,348
- What?
346
00:13:02,349 --> 00:13:03,649
- Okay, uh,
did you hear the one
347
00:13:03,650 --> 00:13:05,890
about the Jewish bird?
- You know what? Never mind.
348
00:13:05,886 --> 00:13:07,286
- Ooh, fun fact.
349
00:13:07,287 --> 00:13:08,887
The dude that voiced
MC Cool Cloud
350
00:13:08,889 --> 00:13:10,689
committed suicide in 1994.
351
00:13:10,690 --> 00:13:12,860
- That's terrible.
- That makes sense.
352
00:13:12,860 --> 00:13:14,230
- We also need to remember
353
00:13:14,227 --> 00:13:17,627
that helping people
just because they're white
354
00:13:17,630 --> 00:13:19,670
is almost as bad
as discriminating
355
00:13:19,666 --> 00:13:22,396
against them
if they're not white.
356
00:13:22,402 --> 00:13:23,872
- It's exactly as bad.
357
00:13:23,871 --> 00:13:26,671
- Well, he was still helping.
358
00:13:26,673 --> 00:13:29,113
- I was helping that lady
because she was old,
359
00:13:29,109 --> 00:13:30,909
not because she was white.
360
00:13:30,911 --> 00:13:33,711
- Ageism is just as
racist as racism.
361
00:13:33,713 --> 00:13:36,523
- That seems untrue.
- It is very true, Jonah.
362
00:13:36,516 --> 00:13:38,416
- Okay, well,
I think we can all
363
00:13:38,418 --> 00:13:41,888
go back to work,
um, unless anyone
364
00:13:41,889 --> 00:13:45,429
wants to file an official
complaint of racial bias?
365
00:13:47,060 --> 00:13:48,700
Sandra?
366
00:13:48,695 --> 00:13:50,895
- I often feel uncomfortable
in the stock room.
367
00:13:50,898 --> 00:13:52,468
There's a man there, Sal,
368
00:13:52,465 --> 00:13:54,525
who makes comments
about my breasts.
369
00:13:54,534 --> 00:13:55,604
- Yeah, okay,
what you're talking about
370
00:13:55,602 --> 00:13:56,642
is sexual harassment,
371
00:13:56,636 --> 00:13:57,766
and that's
a whole other video.
372
00:13:57,770 --> 00:13:59,310
- Okay.
373
00:13:59,306 --> 00:14:01,806
It's just that sometimes
he calls me at home.
374
00:14:01,808 --> 00:14:03,638
- Yeah, we're not gonna watch
another video, Sandra.
375
00:14:03,643 --> 00:14:07,483
- Okay. Sorry.
376
00:14:07,480 --> 00:14:09,950
- Okay, let's get back
out there,
377
00:14:09,950 --> 00:14:11,780
and, uh, let's remember,
378
00:14:11,784 --> 00:14:13,654
"Color blind is"...
379
00:14:13,653 --> 00:14:15,193
all:
"Color kind."
380
00:14:15,188 --> 00:14:16,518
- Thank you.
381
00:14:16,523 --> 00:14:19,993
Amy, could you
stick around for a second?
382
00:14:19,993 --> 00:14:22,563
[Latin hip-hop plays]
383
00:14:22,562 --> 00:14:24,832
* No mires y no hables, carnal,
lo que no debes *
384
00:14:24,831 --> 00:14:27,231
- Try a free sample
of our new salsa, sir?
385
00:14:27,234 --> 00:14:30,604
It's good.
- Nope, absolutely not.
386
00:14:30,603 --> 00:14:32,813
People are not gonna
buy salsa from you
387
00:14:32,805 --> 00:14:34,365
unless they think
it's authentic.
388
00:14:34,374 --> 00:14:36,784
You got to add
some "indigenous-ness."
389
00:14:36,776 --> 00:14:38,246
You know?
390
00:14:38,245 --> 00:14:40,275
Just put a little
Vergara on it.
391
00:14:40,280 --> 00:14:43,150
[as Sofia Vergara]
You want to buy some salsa?
392
00:14:43,150 --> 00:14:45,220
Is for charity!
393
00:14:45,218 --> 00:14:48,458
Oh, Jay, thank you
for my necklace!
394
00:14:48,455 --> 00:14:49,955
- No, stop it.
395
00:14:49,957 --> 00:14:51,717
I'm not going to put
on a fake accent
396
00:14:51,724 --> 00:14:53,964
and I'm not gonna make up
fake charities.
397
00:14:53,961 --> 00:14:56,831
- The charity is real.
Yeah, check it out.
398
00:14:56,829 --> 00:14:59,169
All the proceeds go to the
La Benevolencia Orphanage
399
00:14:59,166 --> 00:15:00,996
in Los Nogales, Mexico.
400
00:15:01,001 --> 00:15:03,201
There's a different child
on every jar.
401
00:15:03,203 --> 00:15:05,143
I think it's a collect 'em all
situation.
402
00:15:05,138 --> 00:15:08,838
- Well, fine, that's great.
403
00:15:08,841 --> 00:15:11,311
That's a very worthy cause,
404
00:15:11,311 --> 00:15:14,351
but I think my dignity
is worth a little bit more
405
00:15:14,347 --> 00:15:15,647
than a few bucks
for charity.
406
00:15:15,648 --> 00:15:17,718
- Ah, these are all Juan S's.
407
00:15:17,717 --> 00:15:18,987
I've already got that one.
408
00:15:18,986 --> 00:15:22,756
Oh, score, Luisa M.!
409
00:15:22,755 --> 00:15:24,485
She was born without knees,
410
00:15:24,491 --> 00:15:26,791
but she loves to dance.
411
00:15:26,793 --> 00:15:29,503
Must be mostly
upper body stuff.
412
00:15:31,431 --> 00:15:34,171
- I think this one
is good for "tar-tar."
413
00:15:34,167 --> 00:15:35,997
"Tar-tar."
414
00:15:36,003 --> 00:15:40,073
- Nope, it's "tartar."
415
00:15:40,073 --> 00:15:42,143
Tartar, tartar,
tartar, tartar.
416
00:15:42,142 --> 00:15:43,842
I--it's all just
sounding like gibberish.
417
00:15:43,843 --> 00:15:46,513
- But um, let me just
take a run up on it.
418
00:15:46,513 --> 00:15:48,783
Um, I like my fish
with "tar-tar" sauce.
419
00:15:48,781 --> 00:15:49,851
It's still weird.
- No.
420
00:15:49,849 --> 00:15:51,079
- Guys, um--
421
00:15:51,084 --> 00:15:53,824
this is benefitting
a very worthwhile cause.
422
00:15:53,820 --> 00:15:56,290
If you like orphans
and fire-roasted peppers,
423
00:15:56,289 --> 00:15:59,659
you truly couldn't make
a better purchase.
424
00:15:59,659 --> 00:16:02,299
[sighs]
425
00:16:02,295 --> 00:16:06,195
[in heavy accent]
Señor Cloud es muy deliciosa.
426
00:16:08,168 --> 00:16:10,738
- [coughs]
427
00:16:10,737 --> 00:16:12,037
- It's amazing, isn't it?
428
00:16:12,039 --> 00:16:15,039
Two pills so similar
in appearance,
429
00:16:15,042 --> 00:16:19,052
but one can save a life
and one can destroy it.
430
00:16:22,382 --> 00:16:24,852
- Look, I think the people
are getting impatient.
431
00:16:24,851 --> 00:16:27,751
- Oh, oh, would you
look at us? Huh?
432
00:16:27,754 --> 00:16:29,524
Gabbing like best friends
433
00:16:29,522 --> 00:16:31,862
who hang out, socially, I think.
434
00:16:31,858 --> 00:16:33,058
Um, why don't you open up
435
00:16:33,060 --> 00:16:34,590
another box of vaccines,
and we'll get to work.
436
00:16:34,594 --> 00:16:36,864
- Okay, where are
the other boxes?
437
00:16:36,863 --> 00:16:38,803
- Well, no, the ones
you brought in this morning.
438
00:16:38,798 --> 00:16:41,368
- Oh, those? We're done.
We went through those.
439
00:16:42,902 --> 00:16:45,942
- [hyperventilates]
Okay. Yeah, okay.
440
00:16:45,938 --> 00:16:48,108
Uh, don't panic,
don't panic, don't panic.
441
00:16:48,108 --> 00:16:50,738
- You okay?
- Don't panic!
442
00:16:50,743 --> 00:16:54,353
- [muttering]
Ah! Ah, what'd I tell you?
443
00:16:54,347 --> 00:16:57,377
Don't panic, because we--
we still have one vaccine left.
444
00:16:57,384 --> 00:16:59,894
What I need you to do
is go out there
445
00:16:59,886 --> 00:17:03,486
and tell everyone that.
Yeah.
446
00:17:10,363 --> 00:17:13,003
- Oh, wow. Oh, wow.
447
00:17:12,999 --> 00:17:15,099
Do I have that?
448
00:17:17,170 --> 00:17:19,470
- [whistles]
Wall to wall, brother.
449
00:17:19,472 --> 00:17:20,842
- Oh, no.
- Yeah.
450
00:17:20,840 --> 00:17:21,970
- Oh, gosh,
that's what that is.
451
00:17:21,974 --> 00:17:23,514
- It happens
to the best of us.
452
00:17:23,510 --> 00:17:25,680
There's celebrities
that have too much tartar.
453
00:17:25,678 --> 00:17:27,508
- Okay.
- Lionel Richie.
454
00:17:27,514 --> 00:17:29,524
- No.
- Yeah.
455
00:17:29,516 --> 00:17:32,816
- Is it similar to what you
would eat in your village?
456
00:17:32,819 --> 00:17:36,519
- Sí. Sí, sí, sí.
457
00:17:36,523 --> 00:17:38,293
Es muy autentica.
458
00:17:38,291 --> 00:17:39,891
[in thick accent]
It is just like the salsa
459
00:17:39,892 --> 00:17:43,902
my mother would make in a bowl
made from a giant rock.
460
00:17:43,896 --> 00:17:48,196
- You must have enjoyed
many fiestas growing up.
461
00:17:48,201 --> 00:17:49,871
Where are you from?
462
00:17:49,869 --> 00:17:52,469
- Um...
463
00:17:52,472 --> 00:17:53,772
- [in heavy accent]
My sister and I grew up
464
00:17:53,773 --> 00:17:56,713
in a small village near
the banks of the Rio Grande.
465
00:17:56,709 --> 00:17:59,049
all:
Ooh!
466
00:17:59,045 --> 00:18:01,145
- Jose.
467
00:18:01,148 --> 00:18:02,618
Gracias, Jose.
468
00:18:02,615 --> 00:18:05,485
- There's two of them.
469
00:18:05,485 --> 00:18:08,455
- Anybody who doesn't get a shot
today will get one tomorrow.
470
00:18:08,455 --> 00:18:10,755
- I can't take another day
off of work.
471
00:18:10,757 --> 00:18:11,987
- Well, ma'am--
472
00:18:11,991 --> 00:18:13,761
- And it's not just me,
it's for my baby!
473
00:18:13,760 --> 00:18:15,800
- I'm sorry--
- And she's all that I have left
474
00:18:15,795 --> 00:18:19,825
of my husband who died
in the war fighting for America!
475
00:18:19,832 --> 00:18:21,572
- Okay, no, well, all right.
476
00:18:21,568 --> 00:18:24,298
We'll give you the shot,
if you just come around--
477
00:18:24,304 --> 00:18:25,814
- Wait, you're gonna
give her my shot?
478
00:18:25,805 --> 00:18:27,435
- Well, sir, it should
probably go to the person
479
00:18:27,440 --> 00:18:28,980
who needs it the most,
don't you think?
480
00:18:28,975 --> 00:18:31,275
- Uh, what about me?
I teach preschool.
481
00:18:36,216 --> 00:18:36,346
.
482
00:18:37,684 --> 00:18:38,624
- This is Eugenics!
- Who are you to play God?
483
00:18:40,453 --> 00:18:42,493
- Okay, again, again, again!
484
00:18:42,489 --> 00:18:44,289
To put it into perspective,
485
00:18:44,291 --> 00:18:46,191
anybody who doesn't get
a vaccine today
486
00:18:46,193 --> 00:18:48,333
will just have to take a short
car ride to another store,
487
00:18:48,328 --> 00:18:49,798
or come back tomorrow.
488
00:18:49,796 --> 00:18:51,396
- That's what the Nazis said.
489
00:18:51,398 --> 00:18:52,928
[all yelling]
490
00:18:52,932 --> 00:18:54,232
[Fiesta music plays]
491
00:18:54,234 --> 00:18:56,404
both:
Olé!
492
00:18:56,403 --> 00:19:01,213
- Yes, yes, we are so happy
you liked our dance,
493
00:19:01,208 --> 00:19:03,638
but it is also important
to remember that
494
00:19:03,643 --> 00:19:07,513
Latinos can be doctors,
and lawyers,
495
00:19:07,514 --> 00:19:09,484
and architects.
496
00:19:10,783 --> 00:19:12,523
Never mind,
I'm just playing.
497
00:19:12,519 --> 00:19:14,519
You should see the look
on your gringo faces.
498
00:19:14,521 --> 00:19:15,521
Arriba!
499
00:19:15,522 --> 00:19:16,892
- Uno mas!
500
00:19:16,889 --> 00:19:19,889
[plays "La Cucaracha"]
501
00:19:19,892 --> 00:19:23,262
*
502
00:19:23,263 --> 00:19:24,833
- No, Carmen, it's not
what it looks like.
503
00:19:24,831 --> 00:19:27,231
*
504
00:19:27,234 --> 00:19:29,844
It's for charity!
505
00:19:29,836 --> 00:19:31,336
both:
Olé!
506
00:19:31,338 --> 00:19:34,238
- Attention, shoppers,
it is 2:00.
507
00:19:34,241 --> 00:19:35,511
All associates
working the morning shift,
508
00:19:35,508 --> 00:19:37,508
it is time for you to leave.
509
00:19:37,510 --> 00:19:38,680
[customers yelling]
510
00:19:38,678 --> 00:19:40,448
- Where you going?
511
00:19:40,447 --> 00:19:41,747
We're not finished here!
512
00:19:41,748 --> 00:19:43,548
We are not finished!
513
00:19:43,550 --> 00:19:46,020
[overlapping shouting]
514
00:19:46,018 --> 00:19:47,448
- If you are leaving,
515
00:19:47,454 --> 00:19:48,864
I hope you learned
that no good deed
516
00:19:48,855 --> 00:19:51,055
goes unpunished,
but, also,
517
00:19:51,057 --> 00:19:52,827
no matter how bad a day
you had,
518
00:19:52,825 --> 00:19:55,255
at the end of your shift
you get to clock out
519
00:19:55,262 --> 00:19:57,602
and leave the job at the door.
520
00:19:58,865 --> 00:20:02,095
Anyway, this does not
pertain to most of you,
521
00:20:02,101 --> 00:20:05,341
so green beans
are on sale for 89¢.
522
00:20:07,206 --> 00:20:10,206
[singing in Spanish]
523
00:20:10,209 --> 00:20:18,249
*
524
00:20:30,730 --> 00:20:31,930
[voice breaks]
I can't do this.
525
00:20:40,740 --> 00:20:44,440
- Tough day, huh?
- Yeah.
526
00:20:44,444 --> 00:20:45,884
I just needed to sit.
527
00:20:45,878 --> 00:20:48,678
- Mind if I join you?
528
00:20:48,681 --> 00:20:51,721
- Be my guest.
529
00:20:56,823 --> 00:20:59,833
[upbeat music]
530
00:20:59,826 --> 00:21:07,926
*
531
00:21:08,968 --> 00:21:11,738
- I was reading
this article about UV rays--
532
00:21:11,738 --> 00:21:13,368
- Shh.
533
00:21:16,343 --> 00:21:18,243
- [sighs]
534
00:21:22,915 --> 00:21:26,085
- Got it!
Great day, guys.
37861
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