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1
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A few last bits of housekeeping.
2
00:00:02,039 --> 00:00:04,613
We switched the isle six endcaps,
3
00:00:04,614 --> 00:00:05,997
so don't be alarmed.
4
00:00:05,998 --> 00:00:08,101
The softball team will once again
5
00:00:08,102 --> 00:00:10,737
not be happening and...
6
00:00:11,365 --> 00:00:12,705
Lastly, ah...
7
00:00:12,706 --> 00:00:16,743
We found out that Jerusha has
an abnormally shaped uterus
8
00:00:16,744 --> 00:00:18,998
which will prevent her
from getting pregnant.
9
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So if any of you know any women
10
00:00:21,347 --> 00:00:25,343
who might like to carry our
baby, you know, let me know.
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Any questions about softball?
12
00:00:29,190 --> 00:00:31,500
Okay then, well, Jeff,
the floor is yours.
13
00:00:31,501 --> 00:00:33,064
Yeah, thank you.
14
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Thank you for that warm reception.
15
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I mean, you're here a lot.
16
00:00:39,233 --> 00:00:40,700
True. Today's not about me, though.
17
00:00:40,734 --> 00:00:42,235
It's about something big.
18
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Bigger than all of us.
19
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Is it your forehead?
20
00:00:44,490 --> 00:00:46,408
No. Hi, Mateo.
21
00:00:46,409 --> 00:00:48,174
Um, sales are up this quarter.
22
00:00:48,209 --> 00:00:51,277
We are within $80,000
of reclassification.
23
00:00:51,312 --> 00:00:53,112
If we can make that
by the end of the day,
24
00:00:53,147 --> 00:00:56,716
we will go from being
a triple-A store to a...
25
00:00:58,322 --> 00:01:00,156
- See where I'm going?
- No.
26
00:01:00,158 --> 00:01:02,693
Reclassified as a...
27
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Nobody's following you. Just finish.
28
00:01:04,830 --> 00:01:08,699
Quadruple-A, guys.
We're gonna be a Quad-A store.
29
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We're gonna be a high volume store.
30
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Whoo! Huh?
31
00:01:13,567 --> 00:01:15,602
Any questions? Garrett.
32
00:01:15,636 --> 00:01:17,403
Abnormally shaped how?
33
00:01:17,438 --> 00:01:20,206
Oh, okay, well, if a woman's
uterus is normally shaped
34
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like a V, Jerusha's is
kinda like a corkscrew.
35
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Kinda like a duck's.
Wait, I'll... I'll draw it.
36
00:01:26,180 --> 00:01:28,213
I meant questions
about the reclassification.
37
00:01:28,214 --> 00:01:29,249
What are we now?
38
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Well, we're triple-A. I just said that.
39
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So this would be one more A then?
40
00:01:34,255 --> 00:01:35,188
Exactly.
41
00:01:35,222 --> 00:01:37,236
Believe me, you guys
are gonna love this.
42
00:01:37,237 --> 00:01:39,125
So do we get anything or...
43
00:01:39,159 --> 00:01:40,293
Yes, you get a sense of pride,
44
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a sense of accomplishment.
45
00:01:41,963 --> 00:01:43,930
Quad-A stores are the first
to feature new products.
46
00:01:43,964 --> 00:01:45,565
Once they take our cafeteria
47
00:01:45,599 --> 00:01:47,300
and transfer it into a
Pizza Hut, there's gonna be...
48
00:01:47,334 --> 00:01:49,461
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Did you just say Pizza Hut?
49
00:01:49,462 --> 00:01:52,972
Yeah.
50
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Like we're famous or something?
51
00:01:54,899 --> 00:01:57,094
Uh, a point of clarification, Jeff,
52
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would it have the soda too?
53
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Yeah, I believe so.
54
00:02:02,149 --> 00:02:03,583
Oh!
55
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That's a formal Pizza Hut.
56
00:02:07,488 --> 00:02:08,422
There she is.
57
00:02:12,056 --> 00:02:15,196
Synced and corrected by hawken45
for www.addic7ed.com
58
00:02:18,499 --> 00:02:19,465
♪
59
00:02:19,500 --> 00:02:20,933
Give me the marker
60
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'cause someone just made
a thousand dollar sale.
61
00:02:23,070 --> 00:02:24,337
- It was Brett.
- I know.
62
00:02:24,371 --> 00:02:26,005
I just like filling in the thermometer.
63
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It's very satisfying.
64
00:02:27,074 --> 00:02:28,579
Is Pizza Hut that great?
65
00:02:28,580 --> 00:02:30,977
When you've been here long
enough, any change is amazing.
66
00:02:30,978 --> 00:02:32,979
Plus, it's like,
Where do you work? Cloud 9.
67
00:02:33,013 --> 00:02:34,314
The regular one?
68
00:02:34,348 --> 00:02:36,115
Uh, no, the one with the Pizza Hut.
69
00:02:36,150 --> 00:02:39,162
It just... it seems odd that
Jeff waited until today
70
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to tell us about all this.
71
00:02:40,525 --> 00:02:42,131
And he was selling it so hard.
72
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"Believe me, you're gonna love it."
73
00:02:43,657 --> 00:02:45,024
That's what my dad said
74
00:02:45,059 --> 00:02:46,403
before he moved out
and got his own place.
75
00:02:46,404 --> 00:02:48,427
Oh, boo-hoo, poor Jonah.
76
00:02:48,428 --> 00:02:49,896
Both of his parents were homeowners.
77
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What a tragedy.
78
00:02:51,070 --> 00:02:52,632
Actually, it was his friend's condo.
79
00:02:52,666 --> 00:02:53,966
That's not gonna help.
80
00:02:54,001 --> 00:02:55,215
You're just looking for problems.
81
00:02:55,216 --> 00:02:57,893
Maybe, but there's
a Quad-A in Crestwood.
82
00:02:57,894 --> 00:02:59,875
We could go over there at lunch.
83
00:02:59,876 --> 00:03:02,241
Check it out, maybe. Just to be safe.
84
00:03:02,276 --> 00:03:03,700
I mean, it's not the worst idea.
85
00:03:03,701 --> 00:03:08,815
Hey, keep your eye on the prize, okay?
86
00:03:08,849 --> 00:03:10,817
- That's a good point.
- Is it?
87
00:03:10,851 --> 00:03:13,486
You know, I honestly didn't
know how many candidates
88
00:03:13,520 --> 00:03:15,503
we'd get from a Craigslist ad, but...
89
00:03:15,504 --> 00:03:17,535
Wonderful things can happen
in all sorts of ways.
90
00:03:17,536 --> 00:03:18,628
I agree.
91
00:03:19,285 --> 00:03:22,195
But you did see the part where
we said we couldn't afford
92
00:03:22,229 --> 00:03:23,996
the going rate for surrogates?
93
00:03:24,031 --> 00:03:28,167
I mean, I know the agencies say
it could be as much as $50,000.
94
00:03:28,202 --> 00:03:29,695
But we've only saved 20.
95
00:03:29,696 --> 00:03:31,738
Oh, 20's more than enough.
96
00:03:32,322 --> 00:03:33,153
Oh.
97
00:03:34,041 --> 00:03:36,175
Of which we can only give you 15.
98
00:03:36,210 --> 00:03:37,543
It's not a problem.
99
00:03:37,578 --> 00:03:39,412
- Sorry, I meant ten.
- That's low, so...
100
00:03:39,446 --> 00:03:42,014
Okay, no, 15, 15, 15. We agree on 15.
101
00:03:42,049 --> 00:03:43,800
- Great.
- Okay.
102
00:03:43,801 --> 00:03:45,666
You should go with this one.
103
00:03:45,667 --> 00:03:46,741
It's 4K.
104
00:03:46,866 --> 00:03:48,802
What does 4K mean?
105
00:03:48,837 --> 00:03:52,072
Oh, um,
106
00:03:52,106 --> 00:03:54,854
The first K is "knowledge."
107
00:03:56,010 --> 00:03:57,876
And then the second K...
108
00:03:57,877 --> 00:04:00,547
4K televisions have 8.3 megapixels.
109
00:04:00,582 --> 00:04:02,848
The human eye is literally incapable
110
00:04:02,849 --> 00:04:05,067
of appreciating a
finer resolution than this.
111
00:04:05,067 --> 00:04:07,354
Wow. Okay, I'll take it.
112
00:04:09,924 --> 00:04:11,822
- There you go.
- Thank you.
113
00:04:13,360 --> 00:04:15,060
It has all of the channels.
114
00:04:16,030 --> 00:04:18,120
Okay, so Charles Marquard,
115
00:04:18,121 --> 00:04:20,502
this is your American
Express Business card.
116
00:04:20,503 --> 00:04:21,268
Yep.
117
00:04:21,302 --> 00:04:23,036
And you don't have an ID with you.
118
00:04:23,071 --> 00:04:24,738
Left it at the office.
119
00:04:24,772 --> 00:04:28,617
You'd like to purchase an
Xbox One and a pile of candy.
120
00:04:28,743 --> 00:04:30,244
Yeah, you know, for the kids.
121
00:04:30,278 --> 00:04:31,915
What kinda business you in?
122
00:04:32,413 --> 00:04:33,862
Oil and gas.
123
00:04:35,443 --> 00:04:36,516
Oh, you know if it was me,
124
00:04:36,523 --> 00:04:38,807
I might pick up a second
Xbox to have one upstairs,
125
00:04:38,808 --> 00:04:40,577
- have one downstairs.
- Okay.
126
00:04:40,978 --> 00:04:42,811
You're a good dad, Mr. Marquard.
127
00:04:47,455 --> 00:04:52,181
♪
128
00:04:52,182 --> 00:04:55,169
Okay, as soon as we hit
$80,000, drop the balloons,
129
00:04:55,170 --> 00:04:57,099
hit the music, get a
candid picture of me
130
00:04:57,100 --> 00:04:58,544
celebrating with everybody
to send to corporate.
131
00:04:58,545 --> 00:05:00,822
Got it, got it.
Hey, now let's talk dancers.
132
00:05:00,823 --> 00:05:03,272
How many are we talking?
And... all dudes?
133
00:05:04,038 --> 00:05:05,338
Maybe no dancers.
134
00:05:05,373 --> 00:05:07,273
Music and balloons with no dancers?
135
00:05:07,308 --> 00:05:10,076
That's... gonna look insane, but fine.
136
00:05:10,111 --> 00:05:13,079
Jeff. Uh, new hat?
137
00:05:13,114 --> 00:05:14,614
Yeah. I splurged.
138
00:05:14,648 --> 00:05:17,250
You know, it's a huge day.
It's a very huge day.
139
00:05:17,284 --> 00:05:19,185
Definitely. Um, we were wondering
140
00:05:19,220 --> 00:05:21,621
if you could maybe
tell us a little bit more
141
00:05:21,655 --> 00:05:24,858
about what we can expect
once this store becomes Quad-A.
142
00:05:24,892 --> 00:05:27,260
Oh, uh, well, yeah, I mean,
143
00:05:27,294 --> 00:05:29,229
things are pretty much
gonna be the same.
144
00:05:29,263 --> 00:05:31,458
Well, but earlier you said
it would be better.
145
00:05:31,459 --> 00:05:33,400
Yes, obviously better.
146
00:05:33,434 --> 00:05:35,735
- Better and the same.
- Nice.
147
00:05:35,770 --> 00:05:37,201
That sounds amazing.
148
00:05:37,203 --> 00:05:38,304
Right.
149
00:05:38,339 --> 00:05:42,208
Is there any possibility
that it could maybe get worse?
150
00:05:42,243 --> 00:05:45,337
You know what, there's a lot
of liars out there, okay?
151
00:05:45,338 --> 00:05:47,806
Look for people who
have scores to settle, perhaps.
152
00:05:47,807 --> 00:05:49,716
And don't believe everything you hear.
153
00:05:49,750 --> 00:05:51,551
What would we have heard?
154
00:05:51,585 --> 00:05:53,253
Oh, I don't know, but whatever it is,
155
00:05:53,260 --> 00:05:54,515
it would've been untrue.
156
00:05:54,516 --> 00:05:56,389
That's why it's a paradox.
157
00:05:58,726 --> 00:06:00,994
Believe me. It's gonna be great.
158
00:06:01,162 --> 00:06:02,081
Trust me.
159
00:06:03,464 --> 00:06:06,620
Man, I can't wait for it to be great.
160
00:06:08,269 --> 00:06:10,069
So, what's next?
161
00:06:10,104 --> 00:06:12,071
You write me a check
and I can have a baby for you
162
00:06:12,106 --> 00:06:13,306
in as little as a week.
163
00:06:14,341 --> 00:06:16,242
- A week?
- Oh, is that too long?
164
00:06:16,277 --> 00:06:17,556
I mean, if you're really impatient,
165
00:06:17,587 --> 00:06:18,701
I can get you one earlier,
166
00:06:18,702 --> 00:06:20,922
but you're not gonna
get to choose the color.
167
00:06:23,074 --> 00:06:24,998
Turns out that when
you can't pay top dollar,
168
00:06:24,999 --> 00:06:27,768
the surrogates you get
are just a bunch of plops.
169
00:06:28,259 --> 00:06:29,960
Aw, I'm sure you'll find someone.
170
00:06:30,166 --> 00:06:31,152
I don't know.
171
00:06:31,159 --> 00:06:33,736
Sometimes I think
that maybe God is trying
172
00:06:33,737 --> 00:06:36,565
to send me a message that
people in their late 50s
173
00:06:36,566 --> 00:06:38,241
shouldn't conceive a child.
174
00:06:38,674 --> 00:06:40,253
That's crazy talk.
175
00:06:40,254 --> 00:06:42,508
You guys are gonna have a killer baby.
176
00:06:42,813 --> 00:06:44,231
Everyone's gonna wanna carry it.
177
00:06:44,232 --> 00:06:46,202
Yeah, right. Would you?
178
00:06:46,579 --> 00:06:48,046
Of course, I would.
179
00:06:49,786 --> 00:06:51,687
Really? You mean that?
180
00:06:51,697 --> 00:06:54,199
Absolutely.
181
00:06:56,054 --> 00:06:58,456
Thank you! Oh, my God.
182
00:06:59,825 --> 00:07:04,295
Jerusha, this is a blessed day.
I found her.
183
00:07:04,329 --> 00:07:05,997
♪
184
00:07:07,683 --> 00:07:10,083
Wow, it is busy here.
185
00:07:10,118 --> 00:07:11,819
Is it always like this?
186
00:07:11,853 --> 00:07:16,290
Welcome to the show, people.
Welcome to the show.
187
00:07:16,324 --> 00:07:18,091
Excuse me, hi, sorry to interrupt.
188
00:07:18,126 --> 00:07:19,960
Uh, can I ask you a question? Oh, sure.
189
00:07:19,994 --> 00:07:21,962
Do you like working here?
190
00:07:21,996 --> 00:07:23,797
I love working here.
191
00:07:23,832 --> 00:07:25,332
It's the best job I've ever had.
192
00:07:25,366 --> 00:07:27,434
- Great. Thank you.
- Have a heavenly day.
193
00:07:27,469 --> 00:07:30,337
All right. See? Best job she's ever had?
194
00:07:30,371 --> 00:07:32,840
Where I come from, something
being the best thing
195
00:07:32,874 --> 00:07:34,341
usually means it's pretty good.
196
00:07:34,375 --> 00:07:36,577
Oh, hey, sorry, just out of curiosity,
197
00:07:36,611 --> 00:07:40,514
what's, uh, what's the
worst part of your job?
198
00:07:40,548 --> 00:07:43,350
No part. It's wonderful.
199
00:07:43,384 --> 00:07:45,085
It's the best job I've ever had.
200
00:07:45,119 --> 00:07:46,920
Have a heavenly day.
201
00:07:46,955 --> 00:07:48,188
Did you hear that? That was...
202
00:07:48,223 --> 00:07:49,690
That was two "best job I ever hads"
203
00:07:49,724 --> 00:07:52,025
It's a colloquialism.
Like, "It is what it is."
204
00:07:52,060 --> 00:07:53,260
Or, "Women be shopping."
205
00:07:53,294 --> 00:07:55,095
Excuse me. Hi.
206
00:07:55,129 --> 00:07:56,864
Um, how long have you been working here?
207
00:07:56,898 --> 00:07:59,166
Well, it's been
the best job I've ever had
208
00:07:59,200 --> 00:08:01,168
for about 4 1/2 years.
209
00:08:01,202 --> 00:08:03,103
Best job I've ever had.
210
00:08:03,137 --> 00:08:05,372
Have a heavenly day.
211
00:08:05,406 --> 00:08:08,141
People love it here. Obviously.
212
00:08:13,848 --> 00:08:14,815
Ah!
213
00:08:14,849 --> 00:08:16,450
Oh, sorry about that.
214
00:08:16,484 --> 00:08:20,988
Jerusha is making embroidery of
your face on a rabbit's body.
215
00:08:21,022 --> 00:08:22,489
- Mm.
- To say thank you.
216
00:08:22,524 --> 00:08:24,558
You know, and she wanted
something she could work with.
217
00:08:24,592 --> 00:08:27,060
Could you profile?
218
00:08:27,095 --> 00:08:29,563
- So Jerusha's on board?
- Yeah.
219
00:08:29,597 --> 00:08:34,134
It just means so much to us
that you're willing to do this.
220
00:08:34,168 --> 00:08:36,003
Means so much to me.
221
00:08:36,519 --> 00:08:40,181
So she doesn't think that I'm,
you know, too young,
222
00:08:40,208 --> 00:08:43,067
or irresponsible? Or stupid?
223
00:08:43,068 --> 00:08:43,710
No.
224
00:08:43,745 --> 00:08:46,413
'Cause, you know, if you guys
wanted to go with someone else,
225
00:08:46,447 --> 00:08:48,715
I... I wouldn't be offended.
226
00:08:49,684 --> 00:08:52,252
Cheyenne, do you still wanna do this?
227
00:08:52,287 --> 00:08:53,921
Oh...
228
00:08:53,955 --> 00:08:57,157
Yes. Definitely.
229
00:08:57,191 --> 00:08:58,725
- Totally.
- Great.
230
00:08:58,760 --> 00:09:01,028
You just, you know, try and stop me.
231
00:09:01,062 --> 00:09:04,364
I won't.
232
00:09:04,399 --> 00:09:06,567
Yeah. The thing is...
233
00:09:06,601 --> 00:09:09,870
- Um...
- Ah, is it Bo?
234
00:09:11,105 --> 00:09:14,441
Mm-hmm, yeah. It's Bo.
235
00:09:14,475 --> 00:09:16,276
If it were up to me, I would just say,
236
00:09:16,311 --> 00:09:19,046
You put a baby in me right now, mister.
237
00:09:19,080 --> 00:09:23,784
But Bo, he just sucks, you know.
238
00:09:23,818 --> 00:09:27,354
Yeah. Bo sucks.
239
00:09:35,296 --> 00:09:39,533
Uh, hey, Len. I'm... I'm Jonah.
240
00:09:39,567 --> 00:09:41,468
How's it going today?
241
00:09:41,502 --> 00:09:44,805
Are you okay?
242
00:09:44,839 --> 00:09:46,473
Mm-hmm.
243
00:09:46,507 --> 00:09:49,376
Oh, she's fine. She does this every day.
244
00:09:51,913 --> 00:09:53,146
Nothing.
245
00:09:53,181 --> 00:09:54,448
You guys aren't supposed
to be back here.
246
00:09:54,482 --> 00:09:55,816
Relax, we're legit.
247
00:09:55,850 --> 00:09:58,543
We work at the Ozark Highlands store.
248
00:09:58,544 --> 00:09:59,878
And we're about to go Quad-A,
249
00:09:59,879 --> 00:10:01,488
so we just wanted to see
what that was like.
250
00:10:01,522 --> 00:10:04,091
They're quaddin' ya, huh?
251
00:10:04,125 --> 00:10:05,892
Yeah. They're quadding us.
252
00:10:05,927 --> 00:10:08,428
So, um, what's it like?
253
00:10:08,463 --> 00:10:10,797
Be straight with me. Polo to polo.
254
00:10:10,832 --> 00:10:13,767
Honestly, you're screwed.
255
00:10:15,103 --> 00:10:17,471
We cannot become a Quad-A.
256
00:10:17,505 --> 00:10:19,773
- I don't understand.
- It's total chaos.
257
00:10:19,807 --> 00:10:21,742
Everyday there is like Black Friday.
258
00:10:21,776 --> 00:10:23,510
- It's hell.
- Hell on steroids.
259
00:10:23,544 --> 00:10:26,146
Isn't hell bad enough
without adding steroids?
260
00:10:26,180 --> 00:10:28,849
Everyone there
is exhausted all the time.
261
00:10:28,883 --> 00:10:30,517
They are open 24 hours.
262
00:10:30,551 --> 00:10:32,607
Which means they never
have a chance to catch up.
263
00:10:32,608 --> 00:10:34,024
So when do they have time to clean?
264
00:10:34,025 --> 00:10:37,962
No, guys, we've come too far.
We are this close to Quad-A.
265
00:10:37,963 --> 00:10:38,692
Now is not the time to...
266
00:10:38,726 --> 00:10:40,327
They don't let employees eat the pizza.
267
00:10:40,361 --> 00:10:42,462
- Withdrawn.
- So what do we do?
268
00:10:42,497 --> 00:10:44,197
We need to slow down sales.
269
00:10:44,232 --> 00:10:46,624
Guys, when do they have time to clean?
270
00:10:46,625 --> 00:10:47,534
They don't.
271
00:10:47,568 --> 00:10:49,373
Well, then it never gets clean.
272
00:10:49,374 --> 00:10:50,637
All right, you heard Amy, guys,
273
00:10:50,672 --> 00:10:53,707
let's cross that finish line
and become Quad-A.
274
00:10:53,741 --> 00:10:55,208
Marcus, were you even listening?
275
00:10:55,243 --> 00:10:57,544
Sorry, I got a text earlier.
276
00:10:57,578 --> 00:11:00,213
Honestly, I missed a lot of
what you guys were saying.
277
00:11:00,248 --> 00:11:03,550
♪ Jah at the controller,
Bua bua bua yeah ♪
278
00:11:03,584 --> 00:11:05,886
♪ Wha gwan rasta Control the simma ♪
279
00:11:05,920 --> 00:11:08,522
- Bo?
- Oh, yo, what up, spouse?
280
00:11:08,743 --> 00:11:10,911
What're you doing here?
Where's Harmonica?
281
00:11:11,033 --> 00:11:12,492
Ah, she's at the zoo. She's good.
282
00:11:12,753 --> 00:11:15,454
Oh, good. Bo's here.
283
00:11:15,509 --> 00:11:18,565
So, why don't we all go
have a chat, you know, and...
284
00:11:18,599 --> 00:11:20,400
see if we can't change your mind?
285
00:11:20,435 --> 00:11:21,868
- Yeah, let's do this.
- Okay.
286
00:11:21,903 --> 00:11:23,236
What're we gonna change my mind about?
287
00:11:23,271 --> 00:11:25,539
- I think you know.
- Huh?
288
00:11:25,573 --> 00:11:28,942
- I think I know?
- You think you know.
289
00:11:30,046 --> 00:11:32,609
Yeah, I called you, and I was like,
290
00:11:33,008 --> 00:11:35,094
"Please, Bo, let me have Glenn's baby."
291
00:11:35,095 --> 00:11:38,334
And you were like, "Nah, girl,
no way, no how, okay?"
292
00:11:38,335 --> 00:11:39,968
Squash that noise. Peace."
293
00:11:40,002 --> 00:11:41,982
Wow, that's crazy, 'cause,
like, the way I remember it,
294
00:11:41,983 --> 00:11:43,518
that never happened at all.
295
00:11:43,913 --> 00:11:45,814
It's funny how perception is,
you know what I'm sayin'?
296
00:11:45,918 --> 00:11:49,514
Bo, is there anything
that Cheyenne and I can say
297
00:11:49,515 --> 00:11:51,356
to help you change your mind?
298
00:11:51,717 --> 00:11:53,151
Mm, I don't know.
299
00:11:53,271 --> 00:11:55,706
It's like, I wanna be
sex-positive, but, like,
300
00:11:55,863 --> 00:11:57,530
on the other side of the hand,
301
00:11:57,760 --> 00:11:59,811
thinking about my wife
banging an old couple...
302
00:11:59,812 --> 00:12:01,031
No, no, no!
303
00:12:01,032 --> 00:12:02,709
And would I get to go with Jerusha?
304
00:12:02,710 --> 00:12:04,475
Almost definitely not.
305
00:12:04,818 --> 00:12:07,229
Well, I really wanna do this for Glenn.
306
00:12:07,263 --> 00:12:08,172
Well, I guess I...
307
00:12:08,180 --> 00:12:10,044
But I also understand your point that
308
00:12:10,045 --> 00:12:12,595
me having another man's
baby might make you look
309
00:12:12,596 --> 00:12:13,678
like some kind of...
310
00:12:14,233 --> 00:12:17,072
I don't know...
a punk-ass chump or something.
311
00:12:17,113 --> 00:12:18,290
Yep, uh-huh.
312
00:12:18,291 --> 00:12:19,504
It... It's okay.
313
00:12:19,875 --> 00:12:22,098
I... I accept your decision and...
314
00:12:23,090 --> 00:12:24,941
Well, I'm disappointed, you know.
315
00:12:24,943 --> 00:12:27,441
I respect that you guys
won't change your morals
316
00:12:27,442 --> 00:12:29,271
for a measly $20,000.
317
00:12:29,537 --> 00:12:31,895
20 grand? Huh?
318
00:12:31,896 --> 00:12:34,971
Of course, for Bo,
it's not about the money.
319
00:12:34,972 --> 00:12:36,040
I didn't know there was money.
320
00:12:36,041 --> 00:12:37,524
I thought this was like
a dare or something.
321
00:12:37,525 --> 00:12:40,129
Yo, for 20 grand you can
stick whatever you want
322
00:12:40,130 --> 00:12:42,197
in either of us.
323
00:12:42,669 --> 00:12:45,543
Okay, everyone, I made some
quick shift assignment changes.
324
00:12:45,544 --> 00:12:48,074
Henry, Elias, you're in ladies' shoes.
325
00:12:48,075 --> 00:12:49,478
Mateo, you're in sports.
326
00:12:49,479 --> 00:12:50,339
So what do I do?
327
00:12:50,340 --> 00:12:52,357
Oh, ah, Kelly, you're on register.
328
00:12:52,358 --> 00:12:53,865
Oh, I've never done that before.
329
00:12:53,866 --> 00:12:55,825
Oh, I know, you're gonna
be so bad at it.
330
00:12:55,826 --> 00:12:56,910
Hey, Ames, what about me?
331
00:12:56,911 --> 00:12:58,983
Oh, Marcus, yes, you just float.
332
00:12:58,984 --> 00:13:00,862
I want the customers to feel
like you're everywhere.
333
00:13:00,863 --> 00:13:02,603
Nice. MVP.
334
00:13:02,604 --> 00:13:04,504
We also need someone to run
interference on Jeff.
335
00:13:04,505 --> 00:13:07,083
Just keep him occupied with
stories that are boring
336
00:13:07,084 --> 00:13:08,761
that no one would ever care about.
337
00:13:08,762 --> 00:13:12,059
I... will do my best to act
like somebody who does that.
338
00:13:12,060 --> 00:13:14,129
You don't need to act,
I mean, you're brutal...
339
00:13:14,163 --> 00:13:15,895
Dina. He knows what he is.
340
00:13:15,896 --> 00:13:17,533
All right, guys, listen up.
341
00:13:17,534 --> 00:13:19,200
This is not a time for words.
342
00:13:19,235 --> 00:13:20,492
But I should say
343
00:13:20,493 --> 00:13:23,318
that this is a chance for
this store to become bigger,
344
00:13:23,857 --> 00:13:25,109
to become more.
345
00:13:25,847 --> 00:13:27,781
But if we work together,
346
00:13:27,988 --> 00:13:30,089
we can stop that from happening.
347
00:13:30,124 --> 00:13:32,091
All right, guys.
348
00:13:32,126 --> 00:13:34,093
Bring it in. On three.
349
00:13:34,128 --> 00:13:35,361
- Okay.
- Ow, ow.
350
00:13:35,396 --> 00:13:37,096
- Hold on a sec.
- Okay, okay, okay.
351
00:13:37,131 --> 00:13:39,098
- No pushing.
- You just stepped on my foot.
352
00:13:39,133 --> 00:13:40,967
- Okay, okay.
- Be gentle.
353
00:13:41,001 --> 00:13:42,835
This is gonna work.
354
00:13:45,873 --> 00:13:50,810
♪
355
00:13:50,844 --> 00:13:52,345
Attention, Cloud 9 shoppers,
356
00:13:52,379 --> 00:13:55,214
there is a carbon monoxide
leak in the store.
357
00:13:55,249 --> 00:13:58,184
It's the silent killer,
so you're gonna wanna go.
358
00:13:58,218 --> 00:14:01,120
Buying some apples, huh?
359
00:14:01,155 --> 00:14:04,023
Whoops.
360
00:14:04,058 --> 00:14:05,858
Nope. Not that one.
361
00:14:05,893 --> 00:14:07,060
I mean, maybe it was just who we are
362
00:14:07,094 --> 00:14:09,128
collectively as a nation at the time,
363
00:14:09,163 --> 00:14:12,131
but things just really felt
like they could be solved.
364
00:14:12,166 --> 00:14:19,472
♪
365
00:14:19,506 --> 00:14:21,974
- I can't let you buy these.
- What? Why?
366
00:14:22,009 --> 00:14:23,643
It's been recalled, sorry.
367
00:14:23,677 --> 00:14:26,145
All right, now it's buzzing
at me like it's mad at me.
368
00:14:26,180 --> 00:14:27,847
Or something.
369
00:14:27,881 --> 00:14:29,415
Making some fruit salad?
370
00:14:29,450 --> 00:14:31,417
My wife needs this.
I promised her I'd get it.
371
00:14:31,452 --> 00:14:34,320
She needs them?
Nobody needs coconut shrimp.
372
00:14:34,354 --> 00:14:36,389
Perhaps we've lost some innocence.
373
00:14:36,423 --> 00:14:38,658
Perhaps the collective
zeitgeist of the country
374
00:14:38,692 --> 00:14:40,359
has soured.
375
00:14:40,394 --> 00:14:43,029
Here, let me help you with that.
376
00:14:43,063 --> 00:14:45,431
♪
377
00:14:45,466 --> 00:14:48,501
Whoo! Not today, bro.
378
00:14:48,535 --> 00:14:50,369
Oh, we're in.
379
00:14:51,605 --> 00:14:54,173
But it's not turning.
380
00:14:54,208 --> 00:14:55,775
Ah. Almost.
381
00:14:55,809 --> 00:14:57,276
But then it got good again,
382
00:14:57,311 --> 00:15:00,713
so I guess ultimately
"Bloodline" was worth watching.
383
00:15:01,081 --> 00:15:02,381
While that's fascinating,
384
00:15:02,416 --> 00:15:04,617
I'm not sure it constitutes an emergency
385
00:15:04,651 --> 00:15:06,352
that we need to talk about right now,
386
00:15:06,386 --> 00:15:07,887
so I gotta get back in there, okay?
387
00:15:07,921 --> 00:15:09,622
Wait, no, no, no, wait, no.
That wasn't the emergency.
388
00:15:09,656 --> 00:15:13,226
No, that was... that was just
pre-emergency small talk.
389
00:15:13,260 --> 00:15:15,353
No, the, um, emergency
390
00:15:15,354 --> 00:15:16,706
is, uh...
391
00:15:18,465 --> 00:15:19,252
You.
392
00:15:20,300 --> 00:15:21,701
What're you talking about?
393
00:15:21,735 --> 00:15:22,938
Aw, Jeff, come on.
394
00:15:22,939 --> 00:15:26,205
You're obviously going through
something and... and I...
395
00:15:26,240 --> 00:15:28,441
I just want you to know that I see you,
396
00:15:28,475 --> 00:15:32,779
and I am here if you ever wanna talk.
397
00:15:34,806 --> 00:15:36,073
I'd like that.
398
00:15:36,108 --> 00:15:38,676
Oh, you would, yeah, uh...
399
00:15:38,710 --> 00:15:39,677
Cool.
400
00:15:39,711 --> 00:15:41,078
I'm torn.
401
00:15:41,113 --> 00:15:42,947
On one hand,
that doesn't look good on you.
402
00:15:42,981 --> 00:15:44,715
On the other hand, what would?
403
00:15:46,518 --> 00:15:48,319
Yes, good work.
404
00:15:48,353 --> 00:15:49,787
I'm just saying what I feel
405
00:15:49,821 --> 00:15:51,922
and people do not like
what they're hearing.
406
00:15:51,957 --> 00:15:54,525
I am a strong cup of coffee.
407
00:15:54,559 --> 00:15:57,194
We're still under and we only
have five minutes till closing.
408
00:15:57,229 --> 00:15:58,596
We might just crap this bed yet.
409
00:16:02,968 --> 00:16:04,268
What's happening?
410
00:16:04,302 --> 00:16:05,803
- Did we hit our goal?
- No, wait.
411
00:16:05,837 --> 00:16:08,272
This has to be a mistake.
We're like thousands under.
412
00:16:08,306 --> 00:16:10,775
No, we're not. I couldn't stop him.
413
00:16:10,809 --> 00:16:13,177
Hell yeah.
414
00:16:13,375 --> 00:16:15,310
Hot tub, son. Ha-ha!
415
00:16:15,571 --> 00:16:16,714
Like we always dreamed of.
416
00:16:16,748 --> 00:16:18,783
It's gonna be like living in
a Holiday Inn Express.
417
00:16:18,817 --> 00:16:21,786
- We can't afford a hot tub.
- We got 20 grand now.
418
00:16:21,820 --> 00:16:23,688
That's literally an
infinite amount of money.
419
00:16:23,722 --> 00:16:25,990
No, Bo, you have
to return that right now.
420
00:16:26,024 --> 00:16:29,126
Can't. It's a floor model. No returns.
421
00:16:29,161 --> 00:16:30,461
So what does that mean?
422
00:16:30,495 --> 00:16:31,629
♪
423
00:16:31,663 --> 00:16:34,832
Congrats. We're officially Quad-A.
424
00:16:34,866 --> 00:16:36,634
May God have mercy on us all.
425
00:16:36,668 --> 00:16:41,572
♪ Feelin' hot, hot, hot ♪
426
00:16:41,606 --> 00:16:44,508
This is a disaster.
Why are you dropping balloons?
427
00:16:44,543 --> 00:16:46,477
It's not my fault canceling balloon drop
428
00:16:46,511 --> 00:16:48,846
looks the exact same
as dropping balloons.
429
00:16:48,880 --> 00:16:51,015
♪
430
00:16:51,663 --> 00:16:52,903
You think you know where
your life is going.
431
00:16:52,904 --> 00:16:54,144
And then suddenly, you're 40,
432
00:16:54,145 --> 00:16:56,096
running a rat race
you don't even understand.
433
00:16:56,097 --> 00:16:57,511
You're trying to fix
everything on the outside.
434
00:16:57,512 --> 00:16:59,731
So I get the boots, I get the earring.
435
00:16:59,732 --> 00:17:01,338
- I get the lipo.
- The hat.
436
00:17:02,030 --> 00:17:04,607
What's wrong with the hat?
The hat's working.
437
00:17:04,642 --> 00:17:06,350
Exactly. Yeah, nothing.
438
00:17:07,478 --> 00:17:08,628
Where was I?
439
00:17:08,630 --> 00:17:10,978
Okay, so I put all the important dates
440
00:17:10,985 --> 00:17:12,974
on this pregnancy calendar, see?
441
00:17:12,975 --> 00:17:17,153
Like the implantation
and the ultrasounds.
442
00:17:17,188 --> 00:17:18,922
So I guess you know
what you're gonna be doing
443
00:17:18,956 --> 00:17:21,508
with all your free time
for the next nine months.
444
00:17:21,509 --> 00:17:25,215
Great, I'll be pregnant
when it's really hot.
445
00:17:25,753 --> 00:17:26,928
That's fun.
446
00:17:29,396 --> 00:17:31,550
Cheyenne, do you really wanna do this?
447
00:17:31,823 --> 00:17:33,497
Mm-hmm.
448
00:17:33,498 --> 00:17:35,279
I'm really happy about it.
449
00:17:37,689 --> 00:17:38,823
The deal's off.
450
00:17:38,857 --> 00:17:40,157
No, I can do it.
451
00:17:40,192 --> 00:17:41,726
I don't want you to.
452
00:17:41,760 --> 00:17:45,796
Because I don't want my baby
carried by a huge stinker,
453
00:17:45,831 --> 00:17:47,565
- like you.
- I'm a stinker?
454
00:17:47,599 --> 00:17:49,100
You're a fat bitch.
455
00:17:49,134 --> 00:17:51,769
Oh, wait, you're being nice.
456
00:17:51,803 --> 00:17:54,405
No, I'm not being nice. I'm being mean.
457
00:17:54,439 --> 00:17:57,942
And... now I don't
want a big stinky baby
458
00:17:57,976 --> 00:17:59,810
from a big stinker like you.
459
00:17:59,845 --> 00:18:01,846
Get out of my office.
460
00:18:01,880 --> 00:18:03,781
You're stinking up the place.
461
00:18:03,815 --> 00:18:05,983
Pee-yew! Ugh.
462
00:18:06,018 --> 00:18:09,004
Go take a bath in some tomatoes.
463
00:18:12,057 --> 00:18:14,025
Quad-A, after all.
464
00:18:14,059 --> 00:18:15,399
We were so close.
465
00:18:16,028 --> 00:18:17,361
I just gotta say...
466
00:18:17,396 --> 00:18:20,131
Been a privilege
taking breaks with you guys.
467
00:18:20,165 --> 00:18:22,433
Sitting here, looking at my phone,
468
00:18:22,467 --> 00:18:24,942
while you guys are
looking at your phones.
469
00:18:25,704 --> 00:18:26,570
I'm gonna miss it.
470
00:18:27,136 --> 00:18:29,106
We never appreciated what we had here.
471
00:18:29,141 --> 00:18:31,886
Let's relax. It was a crappy store.
472
00:18:32,377 --> 00:18:33,624
Yeah, fair enough.
473
00:18:33,845 --> 00:18:35,252
It'll be fine, you guys.
474
00:18:35,747 --> 00:18:37,269
We'll clean as we go.
475
00:18:38,984 --> 00:18:40,409
We'll clean as we go.
476
00:18:41,553 --> 00:18:44,055
How do you get money
stains off your hands?
477
00:18:44,089 --> 00:18:45,389
What're you talking about?
478
00:18:45,424 --> 00:18:47,024
You know how when you handle money,
479
00:18:47,059 --> 00:18:49,126
the ink comes off on your hands?
480
00:18:51,868 --> 00:18:52,630
Another counterfeit.
481
00:18:52,664 --> 00:18:54,732
But I used the pen thingy
and it was yellow.
482
00:18:54,766 --> 00:18:56,399
Yeah, that means fake. You want brown.
483
00:18:56,400 --> 00:18:58,402
I thought it was,
If it's yellow, let it mellow.
484
00:18:58,437 --> 00:18:59,570
Wait, no, that's piss.
485
00:18:59,604 --> 00:19:01,706
There are so many of these.
486
00:19:01,740 --> 00:19:02,840
Where we at?
487
00:19:05,243 --> 00:19:07,344
We're not Quad-A. We did it!
488
00:19:08,780 --> 00:19:13,084
- Alright!
- You tiny little fool.
489
00:19:13,118 --> 00:19:16,387
We're not number one.
We're not nu... no.
490
00:19:16,421 --> 00:19:18,089
It doesn't work as well.
491
00:19:18,123 --> 00:19:21,225
I guess it was when Mateo
dumped me, you know, I just...
492
00:19:21,259 --> 00:19:22,693
I just dove into my work,
493
00:19:22,728 --> 00:19:24,695
'cause I thought that would
be fulfilling, but...
494
00:19:24,730 --> 00:19:27,598
So here I am, on the cusp of
having a Quad-A store
495
00:19:27,632 --> 00:19:31,335
and it's like, I don't even
know if I want that, you know?
496
00:19:31,369 --> 00:19:34,004
Oh, actually, we didn't make Quad-A.
497
00:19:34,039 --> 00:19:35,606
What? Dammit.
498
00:19:35,640 --> 00:19:39,243
- Oh, no, it's gonna be...
- No! No, no, no, no, no, no.
499
00:19:39,277 --> 00:19:42,012
This is bad. I can't go home, Jonah.
500
00:19:42,047 --> 00:19:44,515
I'm [bleep]. I'm [bleep].
501
00:19:44,549 --> 00:19:47,451
I bought a Subaru! That money's gone!
502
00:19:47,486 --> 00:19:49,186
Gone. I couldn't wait a week?
503
00:19:49,221 --> 00:19:51,856
One week. No discipline.
504
00:19:51,890 --> 00:19:53,524
[bleep]!
505
00:19:54,559 --> 00:19:56,193
- Hey, Glenn.
- Mm.
506
00:19:56,228 --> 00:19:57,962
Just wanted to let you know
we didn't make the target.
507
00:19:57,996 --> 00:19:59,351
No Quad-A.
508
00:19:59,352 --> 00:20:00,629
Oh, okay.
509
00:20:02,334 --> 00:20:04,201
- You all right?
- Hmm?
510
00:20:04,236 --> 00:20:05,576
Yeah, I'll be fine.
511
00:20:06,471 --> 00:20:09,140
I was so close to having a baby.
512
00:20:09,174 --> 00:20:09,959
But...
513
00:20:10,842 --> 00:20:12,710
You wanna be my surrogate?
514
00:20:12,744 --> 00:20:14,411
The idea of carrying your child
515
00:20:14,446 --> 00:20:16,147
makes me wanna put
a bullet through my uterus.
516
00:20:16,181 --> 00:20:17,782
I was joking.
517
00:20:17,816 --> 00:20:19,316
I wouldn't want you to carry my baby
518
00:20:19,351 --> 00:20:21,379
if you paid me the $20,000.
519
00:20:22,020 --> 00:20:24,455
Wait, you're paying $20,000?
520
00:20:24,489 --> 00:20:26,657
Just for someone to squirt out your kid?
521
00:20:26,691 --> 00:20:28,507
Well, yeah, a little bit more.
522
00:20:29,094 --> 00:20:32,496
I mean, that's practically
what I take home in a year.
523
00:20:32,531 --> 00:20:36,133
I could fix up my house.
Pay off my credit card bills.
524
00:20:36,168 --> 00:20:38,969
I could put my mom away
for good with money like that.
525
00:20:39,004 --> 00:20:40,182
Well, I mean...
526
00:20:41,439 --> 00:20:44,642
If that's something you wanted,
I could think about it.
527
00:20:44,676 --> 00:20:47,311
I mean, if you were interested
528
00:20:47,345 --> 00:20:49,847
then I would think about it.
529
00:20:49,881 --> 00:20:54,285
- It's not something I want.
- Oh, I would want it far less.
530
00:21:02,394 --> 00:21:04,028
- Okay.
- Okay.
531
00:21:04,062 --> 00:21:05,362
This is cool.
532
00:21:05,397 --> 00:21:06,697
You know, I've always wanted
533
00:21:06,731 --> 00:21:08,365
to have a family of my own someday,
534
00:21:08,400 --> 00:21:09,533
so it'll be great
to have a practice baby
535
00:21:09,568 --> 00:21:11,001
where nothing matters.
536
00:21:11,036 --> 00:21:13,085
- Wait, wait...
- Like, whatever happens to it
537
00:21:13,086 --> 00:21:15,506
happens to it, you know?
38497
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