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1
00:00:47,505 --> 00:00:51,027
You realize no one
on DKSTR uses their family vacation
2
00:00:51,051 --> 00:00:54,864
photos as their profile pic, right?
3
00:00:54,888 --> 00:00:56,824
But it's just me in the picture.
4
00:00:56,848 --> 00:00:59,267
Yeah, but it's really obvious
you cropped them out.
5
00:01:01,436 --> 00:01:02,997
You messaged me.
6
00:01:03,021 --> 00:01:03,874
How could I not?
7
00:01:03,898 --> 00:01:06,232
Your pictures were hot.
8
00:01:06,816 --> 00:01:10,588
Thanks. My my son took most of those
9
00:01:10,612 --> 00:01:13,174
when we were in New York last year.
10
00:01:13,198 --> 00:01:18,661
Oh, your son. How old is he?
11
00:01:20,330 --> 00:01:22,082
Twenty one.
12
00:01:25,376 --> 00:01:28,522
Does he know that you're
dating guys his age?
13
00:01:28,546 --> 00:01:31,716
No, he doesn't meet the guys I date.
14
00:01:33,134 --> 00:01:35,929
Does he know you're gay?
15
00:01:37,138 --> 00:01:39,057
He does!
16
00:01:39,849 --> 00:01:41,702
Is he cute?
17
00:01:41,726 --> 00:01:44,270
You want to know
if I think my son is cute?
18
00:01:44,896 --> 00:01:45,896
Yeah!
19
00:01:48,566 --> 00:01:51,152
Actually, yes, he is pretty cute.
20
00:01:51,861 --> 00:01:53,923
Can I see a picture of him?
21
00:01:53,947 --> 00:01:55,698
What for?
22
00:01:59,119 --> 00:02:01,746
Context.
23
00:02:15,009 --> 00:02:17,029
Oh, he is pretty cute.
24
00:02:17,053 --> 00:02:19,848
OK, I guess good looks run in the family.
25
00:02:20,723 --> 00:02:22,827
Do you want me to set the two of you up?
26
00:02:22,851 --> 00:02:23,851
Is he gay?
27
00:02:24,978 --> 00:02:27,689
Not that I'm aware of.
28
00:02:28,189 --> 00:02:31,109
Damn. I guess you'll have to do then.
29
00:02:34,737 --> 00:02:38,658
Cheeky, cheeky, cheeky.
30
00:02:42,787 --> 00:02:43,830
Here--
31
00:02:46,499 --> 00:02:51,337
Try this. Blow first.
32
00:02:59,971 --> 00:03:01,723
Is it good?
33
00:03:04,934 --> 00:03:08,747
Have you ever been on a date
34
00:03:08,771 --> 00:03:11,065
with older men?
35
00:03:17,113 --> 00:03:18,281
No.
36
00:03:18,781 --> 00:03:20,116
How come?
37
00:03:21,075 --> 00:03:25,496
I don't know. I never pictured myself
with someone older.
38
00:03:27,582 --> 00:03:29,185
That's a shame.
39
00:03:29,209 --> 00:03:30,686
Why is that?
40
00:03:30,710 --> 00:03:32,771
I will give you three reasons why.
41
00:03:32,795 --> 00:03:36,984
One, we're just as fun
as the younger guys.
42
00:03:37,008 --> 00:03:38,527
Two--
43
00:03:38,551 --> 00:03:40,654
We have more money.
44
00:03:40,678 --> 00:03:42,222
And three--
45
00:03:44,015 --> 00:03:47,101
We last longer.
46
00:03:52,649 --> 00:03:54,668
I'll give you two out of three.
47
00:03:54,692 --> 00:03:57,779
You're going to have to
convince me of the third.
48
00:03:58,363 --> 00:04:00,490
And which one is that?
49
00:04:02,742 --> 00:04:06,472
Guess you'll have to wait to find out.
50
00:04:06,496 --> 00:04:09,099
Fair enough. But I will tell you this,
51
00:04:09,123 --> 00:04:12,061
I have plenty of witnesses
to back me up.
52
00:04:12,085 --> 00:04:15,004
Huh. Were they are young like me?
53
00:04:15,922 --> 00:04:19,235
I had to make up for lost time somehow.
54
00:04:19,259 --> 00:04:20,778
What does that mean?
55
00:04:20,802 --> 00:04:24,114
It means I didn't come out until after--
56
00:04:24,138 --> 00:04:27,392
I had my two kids and divorced my wife.
57
00:04:29,185 --> 00:04:32,623
How long ago was that?
58
00:04:32,647 --> 00:04:35,066
Seven years.
59
00:04:36,234 --> 00:04:40,464
Wow, what took so long?
60
00:04:40,488 --> 00:04:44,468
I was completely happy with the life
I had until I wasn't.
61
00:04:44,492 --> 00:04:48,371
There came a point when I realized
that I was living someone else's life.
62
00:04:49,163 --> 00:04:51,642
And I wanted out. So I did that.
63
00:04:51,666 --> 00:04:54,603
I did exactly that,
64
00:04:54,627 --> 00:04:57,439
broke my family's heart along the way.
65
00:04:57,463 --> 00:05:00,675
But, I had to do it.
66
00:05:01,467 --> 00:05:04,304
What brought it on?
67
00:05:06,931 --> 00:05:09,952
Well, I always knew that I liked men,
68
00:05:09,976 --> 00:05:11,245
but I didn't give it much thought.
69
00:05:11,269 --> 00:05:14,915
And it wasn't until I started
seeing more gay men come out in public
70
00:05:14,939 --> 00:05:17,150
that I realized I want what they had.
71
00:05:18,735 --> 00:05:21,863
And it wasn't a hard realization,
like something clicked.
72
00:05:22,405 --> 00:05:26,701
You know, like I said,
the hardest part was telling my family,
73
00:05:27,535 --> 00:05:29,471
Are you still close with them?
74
00:05:29,495 --> 00:05:32,057
Yeah, I'm very close with my wife.
75
00:05:32,081 --> 00:05:34,709
And my kids still visit
when they're in town.
76
00:05:35,668 --> 00:05:40,607
But it was a-- It took us
a long time to get there.
77
00:05:40,631 --> 00:05:41,359
Can I help?
78
00:05:41,383 --> 00:05:42,818
No--
79
00:05:42,842 --> 00:05:46,429
You sit your cute
little butt in that chair.
80
00:05:50,683 --> 00:05:53,245
What about the sex?
81
00:05:53,269 --> 00:05:54,663
What about the sex?
82
00:05:54,687 --> 00:05:55,623
With your wife--
83
00:05:55,647 --> 00:05:58,000
was it ever an issue?
84
00:05:58,024 --> 00:06:01,235
Nah, nah, never.
85
00:06:06,491 --> 00:06:08,969
Did you love her?
86
00:06:08,993 --> 00:06:10,953
Still do.
87
00:06:14,499 --> 00:06:19,396
That's sweet. I've never been
with a girl before.
88
00:06:19,420 --> 00:06:21,047
Never?
89
00:06:24,092 --> 00:06:26,737
Would you ever sleep with a woman again?
90
00:06:26,761 --> 00:06:29,156
Now, why would I do that
91
00:06:29,180 --> 00:06:34,244
when I can have something even better
with cute guys like you?
92
00:06:34,268 --> 00:06:38,606
You realize how pervy that sounds, right?
93
00:06:38,981 --> 00:06:41,418
Judging by the flush in your cheeks,
94
00:06:41,442 --> 00:06:45,363
I don't think you're going
to have a problem with that.
95
00:07:00,211 --> 00:07:02,755
Easy, tiger.
96
00:07:09,345 --> 00:07:12,658
OK, stop. Hey, woah--
97
00:07:12,682 --> 00:07:15,911
stop, stop.
98
00:07:15,935 --> 00:07:16,978
Stop!
99
00:07:17,270 --> 00:07:18,789
When I say stop, I mean stop.
100
00:07:18,813 --> 00:07:21,875
I thought it's what you wanted.
101
00:07:21,899 --> 00:07:25,653
You know what? Let's, eh, let's, um...
102
00:07:26,904 --> 00:07:31,492
Let's just forget it. Let's eat.
103
00:07:34,704 --> 00:07:37,498
I'm sorry, I should go.
104
00:07:38,166 --> 00:07:41,478
Wha-- you're leaving so soon?
105
00:07:41,502 --> 00:07:42,604
I should go home.
106
00:07:42,628 --> 00:07:43,398
Hey, hey, look.
107
00:07:43,422 --> 00:07:46,900
I'm so sorry I snapped at you,
that wasn't fair.
108
00:07:46,924 --> 00:07:47,569
It's fine.
109
00:07:47,593 --> 00:07:49,427
No, no, no, it's not.
110
00:07:50,136 --> 00:07:55,349
Please let me let me make it
up to you. Stay.
111
00:07:56,893 --> 00:08:00,747
I can't.
112
00:08:00,771 --> 00:08:03,792
Hey, come on--
113
00:08:03,816 --> 00:08:05,127
What's the matter?
114
00:08:05,151 --> 00:08:07,236
Nothing.
115
00:08:07,487 --> 00:08:10,490
Hey, come on. Wait, wait, wait, wait.
116
00:08:11,324 --> 00:08:12,218
Get out of my way.
117
00:08:12,242 --> 00:08:13,677
It's OK. You can talk to me.
118
00:08:13,701 --> 00:08:17,079
Why would I talk to you? You don't care.
119
00:08:18,331 --> 00:08:22,752
I'm sorry, if you
want to go, then, then go.
120
00:08:33,930 --> 00:08:34,907
You know how you asked me--
121
00:08:34,931 --> 00:08:38,476
If I'd ever been on a date
with an older guy before?
122
00:08:40,144 --> 00:08:46,543
I lied. The truth is,
I've been with lots of older guys.
123
00:08:46,567 --> 00:08:48,670
Why wouldn't you just tell me that?
124
00:08:48,694 --> 00:08:53,032
Because I'm ashamed.
125
00:08:53,699 --> 00:08:55,844
What are you ashamed of?
126
00:08:55,868 --> 00:08:57,703
I don't know?
127
00:08:58,162 --> 00:09:02,392
The other guys are
not as nice as you are.
128
00:09:02,416 --> 00:09:04,794
What does that mean?
129
00:09:07,463 --> 00:09:09,816
This is stupid, I don't know why
I'm telling you this.
130
00:09:09,840 --> 00:09:13,177
Hey Derek, come here.
131
00:09:16,389 --> 00:09:17,473
Sit.
132
00:09:21,102 --> 00:09:24,855
Talk to me. I'm here.
133
00:09:28,526 --> 00:09:31,380
The other guys, they--
134
00:09:31,404 --> 00:09:34,031
do things to me.
135
00:09:36,284 --> 00:09:39,120
And I have let them.
136
00:09:40,538 --> 00:09:44,208
Things I shouldn't.
137
00:09:46,252 --> 00:09:51,382
I don't have to think when I'm reckless.
138
00:09:53,050 --> 00:09:56,512
I only have to feel.
139
00:09:59,348 --> 00:10:00,993
And I hate myself for it,
140
00:10:01,017 --> 00:10:06,355
but at least they remind
me I'm still worth something.
141
00:10:08,149 --> 00:10:12,528
The sick part is
I can never get enough.
142
00:10:14,447 --> 00:10:15,674
I'd rather be with these men
143
00:10:15,698 --> 00:10:19,035
who treat me like nothing
than be...
144
00:10:19,827 --> 00:10:21,454
Alone.
145
00:10:24,457 --> 00:10:26,709
Pretty much.
146
00:10:30,212 --> 00:10:34,359
I pushed away all the people
who ever cared about me.
147
00:10:34,383 --> 00:10:38,763
I thought I was better off without them.
148
00:10:40,514 --> 00:10:44,036
The guys I talk to
now don't even care about me.
149
00:10:44,060 --> 00:10:45,996
Why would you go back?
150
00:10:46,020 --> 00:10:50,149
Because it's all I deserve.
151
00:10:56,697 --> 00:11:02,203
You are safe with me, I promise.
152
00:11:14,382 --> 00:11:17,778
Why are you being so nice to me?
153
00:11:17,802 --> 00:11:21,198
Because I want to be.
154
00:11:21,222 --> 00:11:25,184
And you deserve that.
155
00:11:29,146 --> 00:11:31,857
Shall we eat?
156
00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:13,566
Is it good?
157
00:12:17,236 --> 00:12:21,157
So have you ever been in love before?
158
00:12:22,324 --> 00:12:25,387
You think someone like me
knows what love is?
159
00:12:25,411 --> 00:12:29,165
I think you are one of the few people
in this world who does.
160
00:12:34,170 --> 00:12:37,399
There were two guys.
161
00:12:37,423 --> 00:12:40,652
We're not friends anymore.
162
00:12:40,676 --> 00:12:43,012
I could never hate you.
163
00:12:43,220 --> 00:12:46,182
(Daniel Pratt - Trying to Be OK playing)
164
00:12:47,725 --> 00:12:51,061
What happened?
165
00:12:54,273 --> 00:12:55,292
They were too good for me.
166
00:12:55,316 --> 00:12:57,627
- They were too good for me.
- Ask myself what I miss more
167
00:12:57,651 --> 00:12:58,819
How so?
168
00:13:00,613 --> 00:13:03,008
- They knew how to love.
- Thought of you, of you walking out the door
169
00:13:03,032 --> 00:13:04,050
Thought of you, or you walking out the door
170
00:13:04,074 --> 00:13:05,886
- You'll get there--
Thought of you, of you walking out the door
171
00:13:05,910 --> 00:13:10,664
- You just have to learn how to love yourself
first. Through the late fights and long nights
172
00:13:11,624 --> 00:13:14,835
I don't know why I even cry
173
00:13:17,630 --> 00:13:21,383
I didn't know we had a love
that could even hurt this deep
174
00:13:22,343 --> 00:13:26,222
I don't know how much my heart can take
175
00:13:27,890 --> 00:13:31,852
I've been trying to get by, but it's fake
176
00:13:33,562 --> 00:13:36,541
It's not like I would take you back,
177
00:13:36,565 --> 00:13:38,460
things would be the same
178
00:13:38,484 --> 00:13:40,653
Oh, I got to give it to you, love
179
00:13:41,779 --> 00:13:43,215
You left your mark
180
00:13:43,239 --> 00:13:46,367
Now I'm trying to be okay
181
00:13:56,502 --> 00:14:00,297
I lost the remembrance of your face
182
00:14:02,216 --> 00:14:06,595
All the times you cursed
me to feel this place
183
00:14:07,972 --> 00:14:11,767
People say I'm the best they've ever seen
184
00:14:13,561 --> 00:14:18,625
Guess a man looks different
when he finally breathes
185
00:14:18,649 --> 00:14:24,256
'Cause I don't know how
much my heart can take
186
00:14:24,280 --> 00:14:28,492
I've been trying to get by, but it's fake
187
00:14:29,618 --> 00:14:32,848
It's not like how I would take you back,
188
00:14:32,872 --> 00:14:34,891
things would be the same
189
00:14:34,915 --> 00:14:38,144
Oh, I got to give it to you, love
190
00:14:38,168 --> 00:14:39,521
You left your mark
191
00:14:39,545 --> 00:14:41,422
Now I'm trying to be okay
192
00:14:50,764 --> 00:14:52,892
I'm just trying to be okay
13554
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