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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:10,400 --> 00:00:12,500 WOMAN ON TV: Day after day... 2 00:00:12,501 --> 00:00:14,600 The store that one might... 3 00:00:16,300 --> 00:00:19,799 I hate television. It gives me headaches. 4 00:00:19,800 --> 00:00:23,100 There are so many magnetic waves traveling in the airspace 5 00:00:23,101 --> 00:00:25,199 because of TV and television, we're losing 6 00:00:25,200 --> 00:00:27,200 10 times as many brain cells as we're supposed to. 7 00:00:27,201 --> 00:00:29,799 Oh, please. 8 00:00:29,800 --> 00:00:32,800 "The cow says blank." 9 00:00:32,801 --> 00:00:34,800 Three letters. 10 00:00:34,801 --> 00:00:36,350 Dude! 11 00:00:36,351 --> 00:00:37,899 "Dude"! 12 00:00:37,900 --> 00:00:40,799 I don't know. Magnetic waves, brain cells. 13 00:00:40,800 --> 00:00:43,100 I don't understand the connection between that stuff. 14 00:00:43,101 --> 00:00:44,800 You know what else I heard? 15 00:00:44,900 --> 00:00:48,000 Magnetic waves shrink silicone molecules. 16 00:00:49,800 --> 00:00:50,799 - Aah! - Aah! 17 00:00:50,800 --> 00:00:52,800 Oh, my God! Turn it off! 18 00:00:52,900 --> 00:00:53,850 It's not working! 19 00:00:53,851 --> 00:00:54,799 It's backwards! 20 00:00:54,800 --> 00:00:56,200 - What do we do? - I don't know! 21 00:00:56,201 --> 00:00:57,999 Oh, my God! 22 00:00:58,000 --> 00:01:00,400 [Television clicks off, both sigh] 23 00:01:00,401 --> 00:01:01,999 That was kind of scary. 24 00:01:02,000 --> 00:01:04,200 - I know something even scarier. - What? 25 00:01:04,300 --> 00:01:05,599 Have you heard about this videotape? 26 00:01:05,600 --> 00:01:07,800 Where they do it on the boat? And then in the car? 27 00:01:07,801 --> 00:01:08,799 And then in the bathtub? 28 00:01:08,800 --> 00:01:12,000 He's like, "Baby, I love you." And she's like, "Where are we?" 29 00:01:12,001 --> 00:01:13,400 - And did you see the... - No. 30 00:01:13,401 --> 00:01:14,999 - Not that tape. - Oh. 31 00:01:15,000 --> 00:01:16,799 The one with all the scary images. 32 00:01:16,800 --> 00:01:19,200 After you watch the tape, the phone rings. 33 00:01:19,300 --> 00:01:22,400 And this scary voice comes on and says you're gonna die in... 34 00:01:22,401 --> 00:01:24,800 Seven days. I saw that one with Josh last weekend. 35 00:01:24,900 --> 00:01:27,000 You were with Josh last weekend? 36 00:01:27,001 --> 00:01:29,200 - Oh, my God! - [Laughs] 37 00:01:31,100 --> 00:01:33,000 Oh, yes, I was. 38 00:01:33,600 --> 00:01:34,800 Oh, you ho! 39 00:01:37,800 --> 00:01:38,700 You know it! 40 00:01:38,800 --> 00:01:40,400 Oh! 41 00:01:41,800 --> 00:01:43,400 - [Fabric ripping] - Aah! 42 00:01:43,500 --> 00:01:46,400 [Telephone ringing] 43 00:01:47,900 --> 00:01:49,200 [Snaps, whimpers] 44 00:01:52,000 --> 00:01:54,000 This is really weird. 45 00:01:54,001 --> 00:01:55,400 Yeah. 46 00:01:55,500 --> 00:01:58,600 Big house, only one phone. 47 00:02:01,200 --> 00:02:02,800 Hello? 48 00:02:09,800 --> 00:02:11,100 Hello? 49 00:02:11,200 --> 00:02:15,400 WOMAN: I'm coming for you, my precious. 50 00:02:15,401 --> 00:02:16,300 Hi, Mom. 51 00:02:16,400 --> 00:02:18,800 Hi, precious. Having fun? 52 00:02:18,900 --> 00:02:21,900 Hey, ask her which bathroom has the vibrating showerhead. 53 00:02:21,901 --> 00:02:24,200 [Thunder crashes] 54 00:02:24,201 --> 00:02:25,600 Hello? 55 00:02:26,200 --> 00:02:27,200 Hello? 56 00:02:27,400 --> 00:02:29,500 [Creaking] 57 00:02:47,400 --> 00:02:49,400 - [Toaster dings] - [Gasps, screams] 58 00:02:49,500 --> 00:02:51,100 [Squawking] 59 00:03:15,500 --> 00:03:17,100 Katie? 60 00:03:18,600 --> 00:03:20,200 Katie? 61 00:03:25,100 --> 00:03:26,800 Katie? 62 00:03:35,100 --> 00:03:37,900 Are you okay? 63 00:03:40,300 --> 00:03:42,400 Are you okay? 64 00:03:45,200 --> 00:03:47,200 Aah! 65 00:04:04,800 --> 00:04:07,900 [Girl screams] 66 00:04:07,901 --> 00:04:09,600 Ow. 67 00:04:10,400 --> 00:04:12,800 [Girl screams] 68 00:04:14,300 --> 00:04:15,999 God! 69 00:04:16,000 --> 00:04:18,000 [Urinating] 70 00:04:18,001 --> 00:04:19,999 [Girl screams] 71 00:04:20,000 --> 00:04:23,200 [Urinating stops, screaming stops] 72 00:04:23,201 --> 00:04:24,300 [Urinating resumes] 73 00:04:24,301 --> 00:04:25,499 [Girl screams] 74 00:04:25,500 --> 00:04:27,099 [Urinating stops, screaming stops] 75 00:04:27,100 --> 00:04:29,100 [Urinating resumes, screaming resumes, both stop] 76 00:04:29,101 --> 00:04:31,100 [Urinating resumes, screaming resumes, both stop] 77 00:04:31,101 --> 00:04:32,300 - Oh! - [Crash] 78 00:04:36,700 --> 00:04:39,400 [Wind whipping] 79 00:04:40,400 --> 00:04:42,000 Whoa. 80 00:04:44,300 --> 00:04:46,599 [Wind whipping] 81 00:04:46,600 --> 00:04:49,100 - Tom, did you hear... - [Dog barks] 82 00:04:49,101 --> 00:04:50,400 The dogs are acting strange. 83 00:04:50,600 --> 00:04:53,200 [Barking] 84 00:04:56,400 --> 00:04:58,200 [Whimpers] 85 00:04:58,201 --> 00:05:00,000 [Girl screams] 86 00:05:10,200 --> 00:05:11,600 [Girl screams] 87 00:05:11,601 --> 00:05:13,200 Sue! 88 00:05:13,600 --> 00:05:15,600 What are you doing out here? 89 00:05:15,700 --> 00:05:17,200 We were worried sick. 90 00:05:17,201 --> 00:05:18,400 What's wrong? 91 00:05:28,000 --> 00:05:30,300 I wonder what they're trying to tell us. 92 00:05:38,000 --> 00:05:39,200 ANNOUNCER: And now... 93 00:05:39,400 --> 00:05:42,400 Washington, D.C.'s leading morning news program, 94 00:05:42,401 --> 00:05:43,999 "The Morning News." 95 00:05:44,000 --> 00:05:45,599 Good morning. I'm Ross Giggins. 96 00:05:45,600 --> 00:05:48,000 For our top story, we turn now to Cindy Campbell. 97 00:05:48,001 --> 00:05:49,400 Thank you, Ross. 98 00:05:49,500 --> 00:05:52,000 There's a developing story in Middleburg at this hour. 99 00:05:52,001 --> 00:05:54,000 A mysterious crop circle appeared 100 00:05:54,100 --> 00:05:56,799 in local farmer Tom Logan's cornfield. 101 00:05:56,800 --> 00:06:00,400 Elaborate prank or extraterrestrial phenomenon? 102 00:06:00,500 --> 00:06:03,500 We'll update you as soon as we have any further information. 103 00:06:03,501 --> 00:06:05,600 But either way, it's clear something strange 104 00:06:05,601 --> 00:06:07,600 is happening in that small town. 105 00:06:07,700 --> 00:06:09,499 Ross? 106 00:06:09,500 --> 00:06:11,550 I'm sorry. I wasn't listening. 107 00:06:11,551 --> 00:06:13,600 Coming up, more news after this. 108 00:06:15,400 --> 00:06:17,099 - Cindy, you got a second? - Sure. 109 00:06:17,100 --> 00:06:20,200 I want you to take a look at this for that strip club exposรฉ. 110 00:06:20,201 --> 00:06:22,300 But I'd rather stick with the crop circle story. 111 00:06:22,301 --> 00:06:24,399 Oh, come on. You know those things are just a hoax. 112 00:06:24,400 --> 00:06:27,400 No, I'm telling you, I sense something about that cornfield. 113 00:06:27,401 --> 00:06:30,200 Call it women's intuition or ESPN or both. 114 00:06:30,201 --> 00:06:32,000 But I can tell when danger's near. 115 00:06:32,001 --> 00:06:33,950 [Gasps] Ow! 116 00:06:33,951 --> 00:06:35,899 Ow! My eyes! 117 00:06:35,900 --> 00:06:39,200 Cindy, it's sweeps month. Ratings mean everything. 118 00:06:39,201 --> 00:06:41,800 People want human interest stories. 119 00:06:41,801 --> 00:06:43,450 Like the one you did yesterday. 120 00:06:43,451 --> 00:06:45,099 The report on breast augmentation? 121 00:06:45,100 --> 00:06:47,400 It was just 10 minutes of topless women. 122 00:06:47,401 --> 00:06:49,800 I mean, come on. 123 00:06:49,801 --> 00:06:51,199 MAN: Wow! 124 00:06:51,200 --> 00:06:52,600 Why are these so interesting? 125 00:06:52,700 --> 00:06:53,999 Oh, for God's sake. 126 00:06:54,000 --> 00:06:56,199 [Sighs] People don't care about this. 127 00:06:56,200 --> 00:06:59,800 They want hard-hitting stories and in-depth coverage and... 128 00:06:59,801 --> 00:07:00,999 And twins! 129 00:07:01,000 --> 00:07:04,800 I love parties that never end 130 00:07:04,801 --> 00:07:07,000 Dogs that love cats 131 00:07:07,001 --> 00:07:09,199 And... And twins 132 00:07:09,200 --> 00:07:12,200 I love burritos at 4:00 a.m. 133 00:07:12,201 --> 00:07:14,900 Parties that never end 134 00:07:14,901 --> 00:07:17,600 Dogs that love cats 135 00:07:20,200 --> 00:07:22,050 You think it was the Kreisel boys 136 00:07:22,051 --> 00:07:24,175 who cut that stuff into your corn? 137 00:07:24,176 --> 00:07:26,299 All I know is my crops are gone. 138 00:07:26,300 --> 00:07:29,500 The bank's gonna foreclose if I can't pay the rent. 139 00:07:29,501 --> 00:07:32,800 I got 60 days to come up with $ 1.50. 140 00:07:33,600 --> 00:07:35,399 I'm sorry. 141 00:07:35,400 --> 00:07:36,600 The last thing you needed was more... 142 00:07:36,700 --> 00:07:38,000 [Blowing nose] 143 00:07:38,100 --> 00:07:40,599 ...hardship in your life. 144 00:07:40,600 --> 00:07:42,500 Especially after what happened to... 145 00:07:42,501 --> 00:07:44,650 Sheriff, I don't need your sympathy. 146 00:07:44,651 --> 00:07:46,800 I didn't mean to upset you, Father. 147 00:07:46,900 --> 00:07:50,150 Please. I'm not a minister anymore. 148 00:07:50,151 --> 00:07:53,400 I lost my faith that terrible night. 149 00:07:53,401 --> 00:07:54,999 Your faith will return. 150 00:07:55,000 --> 00:07:57,900 Just as sure as the sun will rise. 151 00:07:57,901 --> 00:07:59,199 Sounds like a long shot. 152 00:07:59,200 --> 00:08:01,350 Look, there's always an explanation 153 00:08:01,351 --> 00:08:03,500 for all this so-called phenomena. 154 00:08:03,501 --> 00:08:04,700 Maybe you're right. 155 00:08:04,800 --> 00:08:06,800 It was probably just the Kreisels. 156 00:08:06,801 --> 00:08:08,799 And when I get through with them, 157 00:08:08,800 --> 00:08:11,200 I doubt you'll be seeing anything strange on this farm 158 00:08:11,201 --> 00:08:12,400 for a long time. 159 00:08:12,401 --> 00:08:14,400 You'll see. 160 00:08:15,800 --> 00:08:18,800 You all right, Tom? Get some rest. 161 00:08:25,900 --> 00:08:27,550 George! 162 00:08:27,551 --> 00:08:29,275 [Humming] 163 00:08:29,276 --> 00:08:31,000 George! 164 00:08:33,000 --> 00:08:36,000 I need you back here tomorrow night after you pick up Sue. 165 00:08:36,001 --> 00:08:37,200 That tractor needs fixing. 166 00:08:37,300 --> 00:08:40,400 Sorry, dawg. I can't help you. I have to get ready for my show. 167 00:08:40,401 --> 00:08:43,399 Not that stupid hip-hop stuff again. 168 00:08:43,400 --> 00:08:45,600 Damn it, when are you going to do something with your life? 169 00:08:45,601 --> 00:08:46,399 I got a dream! 170 00:08:46,400 --> 00:08:48,699 - What is your dream? - To have a dream. 171 00:08:48,700 --> 00:08:52,400 George, all you've done is chase adolescent fantasies. 172 00:08:52,401 --> 00:08:54,400 "I want to be an astronaut. A cowboy. 173 00:08:54,500 --> 00:08:56,199 Gynecologist to the stars." 174 00:08:56,200 --> 00:08:58,000 And now this stupid hip-hop thing. 175 00:08:58,001 --> 00:08:59,000 For your information, 176 00:08:59,100 --> 00:09:01,500 this hip-hop thing is gonna get me paid. 177 00:09:01,501 --> 00:09:03,350 I'm gonna win that rap battle. 178 00:09:03,351 --> 00:09:05,875 Rap battle? Oh, for God's sake. 179 00:09:05,876 --> 00:09:07,838 You just hate me 'cause I'm black. 180 00:09:07,839 --> 00:09:09,799 You don't have any faith in me. 181 00:09:09,800 --> 00:09:11,800 You don't have any faith in anything anymore. 182 00:09:11,801 --> 00:09:13,600 So why don't you just worry about you, 183 00:09:13,601 --> 00:09:16,400 and I'll worry about... Aah! 184 00:09:28,000 --> 00:09:30,700 [Car alarm activates] 185 00:09:32,400 --> 00:09:34,300 Cody! 186 00:09:35,200 --> 00:09:37,199 You're late again, Aunt Cindy. 187 00:09:37,200 --> 00:09:39,200 I'm sorry. I was stuck in traffic. 188 00:09:39,201 --> 00:09:40,200 Cindy! 189 00:09:40,300 --> 00:09:41,799 Brenda, hi! 190 00:09:41,800 --> 00:09:44,300 Oh, it's great to see you! 191 00:09:44,301 --> 00:09:46,799 Oh, it's been so long. 192 00:09:46,800 --> 00:09:49,499 Oh, too long. I've been working so hard. 193 00:09:49,500 --> 00:09:51,600 I've had to spend more and more time at the station. 194 00:09:51,601 --> 00:09:54,400 The news just keeps coming in. 195 00:09:54,401 --> 00:09:56,199 What was the assignment? 196 00:09:56,200 --> 00:09:57,800 Draw your family and friends. 197 00:09:57,900 --> 00:09:59,199 Oh. 198 00:09:59,200 --> 00:10:00,799 Anyone new in your life, Cindy? 199 00:10:00,800 --> 00:10:03,750 Well, you know, I just haven't found the right guy. 200 00:10:03,751 --> 00:10:06,700 I'm looking for something more than just good sex. 201 00:10:06,701 --> 00:10:08,199 I know. You want commitment. 202 00:10:08,200 --> 00:10:10,800 No, I want great sex. And when I meet that guy... 203 00:10:10,801 --> 00:10:13,199 That's what I'm talking 'bout! 204 00:10:13,200 --> 00:10:15,800 You want a guy that's like, bam, bam, bam! 205 00:10:15,801 --> 00:10:18,000 You know what I'm saying? 206 00:10:18,001 --> 00:10:20,199 Did I say stop drawing? 207 00:10:20,200 --> 00:10:23,200 Look, when I meet Mr. Right, I'll know. 208 00:10:23,201 --> 00:10:24,500 [Humming] 209 00:10:24,501 --> 00:10:25,800 Uncle George! 210 00:10:25,900 --> 00:10:28,000 Hey, sweetie! Come here! 211 00:10:28,001 --> 00:10:29,599 How are you? Oh! 212 00:10:29,600 --> 00:10:32,400 Mmm! Go get your stuff, okay? 213 00:10:33,600 --> 00:10:34,700 I know you. 214 00:10:34,800 --> 00:10:36,799 You're Tom Logan's brother. 215 00:10:36,800 --> 00:10:39,200 And you're that reporter, Cindy Campbell. 216 00:10:39,201 --> 00:10:41,600 You did the story on our cop cycles. 217 00:10:41,601 --> 00:10:42,800 Crop circles. 218 00:10:42,801 --> 00:10:44,300 Right. 219 00:10:44,800 --> 00:10:47,000 So, you're here to pick up your... 220 00:10:47,100 --> 00:10:48,599 Nephew, Cody. 221 00:10:48,600 --> 00:10:50,400 You don't dress like a farmer. 222 00:10:50,401 --> 00:10:51,900 My brother's the farmer. 223 00:10:51,901 --> 00:10:53,599 I'm the rapper. 224 00:10:53,600 --> 00:10:55,599 - Hmm. - Oh, for real. 225 00:10:55,600 --> 00:10:57,199 And here's the 6-1-1 on that. 226 00:10:57,200 --> 00:11:00,700 That's phone repair. You mean 4-1-1. 227 00:11:00,701 --> 00:11:01,600 Right. 228 00:11:01,700 --> 00:11:05,400 So, I'll be doing the rap battle at the 23 Club tomorrow night. 229 00:11:05,401 --> 00:11:07,200 Oh, I don't believe this shit. 230 00:11:07,201 --> 00:11:08,700 Word! You two should come down! 231 00:11:08,701 --> 00:11:10,200 I'll be rappin', I'll be cappin', 232 00:11:10,300 --> 00:11:12,000 I'll be tappin', I'll be flappin', 233 00:11:12,001 --> 00:11:14,100 I'll be happen-ing. 234 00:11:14,101 --> 00:11:16,050 Ding, bing, wing. 235 00:11:16,051 --> 00:11:17,999 - Yo! - Sounds good! 236 00:11:18,000 --> 00:11:19,800 Would, could, should, 'hood. 237 00:11:19,801 --> 00:11:21,599 - Ugh! - Gug, mug, dug, bug. 238 00:11:21,600 --> 00:11:25,200 If we say we'll come, will you shut your ass up? 239 00:11:25,201 --> 00:11:27,399 Okay, then. Fresh. 240 00:11:27,400 --> 00:11:28,800 I'll see you guys tomorrow night. 241 00:11:29,000 --> 00:11:30,250 Okay. Bye. 242 00:11:30,251 --> 00:11:31,500 Peace out. 243 00:11:36,200 --> 00:11:38,400 Now, who the fuck did that? 244 00:11:44,000 --> 00:11:45,200 Honey, what is it? 245 00:11:45,400 --> 00:11:47,500 Are you having one of your visions? 246 00:11:47,501 --> 00:11:49,600 There's a girl... with black hair. 247 00:11:49,601 --> 00:11:51,999 She wants to kill you. 248 00:11:52,000 --> 00:11:56,400 Your period starts in three... two... one. 249 00:11:56,500 --> 00:11:59,050 What else? Cody, what else do you see? 250 00:11:59,051 --> 00:12:01,600 I see a little boy and a grown woman. 251 00:12:01,601 --> 00:12:02,400 But no father. 252 00:12:02,500 --> 00:12:03,599 Oh, Cody. 253 00:12:03,600 --> 00:12:05,600 I see you kneeling in dog shit. 254 00:12:05,601 --> 00:12:07,799 What? Ugh! 255 00:12:07,800 --> 00:12:10,299 Oh, for God's sake. 256 00:12:10,300 --> 00:12:11,899 Cody, don't you understand? 257 00:12:11,900 --> 00:12:14,799 As long as we have each other, that's all we need. 258 00:12:14,800 --> 00:12:18,350 I know things have been tough for you since your mom died. 259 00:12:18,351 --> 00:12:21,900 God, I have been so selfish. Always putting my career first. 260 00:12:21,901 --> 00:12:24,800 From now on, I'm gonna be thinking about you 24... 261 00:12:25,600 --> 00:12:27,599 Damn! 262 00:12:27,600 --> 00:12:30,300 Wait, Cindy! Wait! 263 00:12:30,600 --> 00:12:33,600 Aah! 264 00:12:44,800 --> 00:12:48,300 Honey, I'm gonna be leaving soon, so... 265 00:13:00,700 --> 00:13:03,100 Do you know who she is? 266 00:13:03,101 --> 00:13:04,700 No. 267 00:13:04,800 --> 00:13:07,100 But sometimes she talks to me. 268 00:13:07,101 --> 00:13:08,800 She's coming tonight. 269 00:13:08,801 --> 00:13:11,200 [Knock on door] 270 00:13:21,000 --> 00:13:22,700 Oh, Father Muldoon. 271 00:13:22,701 --> 00:13:23,999 Cindy. 272 00:13:24,000 --> 00:13:25,999 I'm so grateful you could come. 273 00:13:26,000 --> 00:13:28,550 I've called all over for babysitters. 274 00:13:28,551 --> 00:13:31,100 I don't mind filling in now and then. 275 00:13:31,101 --> 00:13:33,000 Where is little Cody? 276 00:13:33,100 --> 00:13:34,799 [Footsteps] 277 00:13:34,800 --> 00:13:36,199 - [Door slams] - I don't know. 278 00:13:36,200 --> 00:13:37,999 He must be back in his room, playing. 279 00:13:38,000 --> 00:13:41,000 Anyway, I left a number where I can be reached on the table. 280 00:13:41,001 --> 00:13:43,600 Also, he has a little rash on his behind. 281 00:13:43,601 --> 00:13:45,950 So make sure he takes a bath. 282 00:13:45,951 --> 00:13:48,300 Thank you, Father. Good night. 283 00:13:50,800 --> 00:13:52,300 Cody? 284 00:13:53,200 --> 00:13:54,399 You can't stop us 285 00:13:54,400 --> 00:13:55,800 Who you looking at? 286 00:13:55,900 --> 00:13:57,450 Don't try to drop us 287 00:13:57,451 --> 00:13:59,675 This ain't no... 288 00:13:59,676 --> 00:14:01,900 [Crowd cheering] 289 00:14:03,000 --> 00:14:05,700 MAHALIK: Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's getting thick up in here. 290 00:14:05,701 --> 00:14:08,400 Hey, look, before we get on with the battles tonight, 291 00:14:08,500 --> 00:14:10,000 I got a couple announcements to make. 292 00:14:10,200 --> 00:14:12,300 I know y'all want to bust a cap in the air 293 00:14:12,301 --> 00:14:13,499 for your favorite rapper. 294 00:14:13,500 --> 00:14:16,600 But if you could please hold on to your gunfire 295 00:14:16,601 --> 00:14:18,400 until the end of the show. 296 00:14:18,401 --> 00:14:19,600 [Jeering] 297 00:14:19,800 --> 00:14:21,399 Let's just put the safeties on. 298 00:14:21,400 --> 00:14:24,400 It's on the left side of the gun above the trigger guard. 299 00:14:24,401 --> 00:14:26,800 [Bullet ricochets, woman shrieks] 300 00:14:26,900 --> 00:14:29,600 Will somebody get his ass out of here? 301 00:14:29,700 --> 00:14:32,800 All right. Deejay, spin that shit! 302 00:14:32,801 --> 00:14:35,800 [Up-tempo beat plays] 303 00:14:38,200 --> 00:14:40,400 [Crowd cheers] 304 00:14:52,300 --> 00:14:54,000 Whoa! My bad. 305 00:14:54,001 --> 00:14:55,600 Mother... 306 00:14:58,800 --> 00:15:01,899 Brenda, is something wrong? You look scared. 307 00:15:01,900 --> 00:15:04,800 I don't know. All that stuff you was saying on TV... 308 00:15:04,900 --> 00:15:07,600 I just got a weird feeling something bad is heading my way. 309 00:15:07,601 --> 00:15:09,500 Like when you see an Asian person 310 00:15:09,501 --> 00:15:10,799 behind the wheel of a car. 311 00:15:10,800 --> 00:15:14,400 Cindy, after the show, you think you could come back to my crib 312 00:15:14,500 --> 00:15:15,800 and hang out with me? 313 00:15:15,801 --> 00:15:17,400 I don't want to be alone. 314 00:15:17,401 --> 00:15:19,000 Oh, of course I will, Brenda. 315 00:15:19,001 --> 00:15:21,200 Oh, I love you. 316 00:15:21,201 --> 00:15:23,000 Pay my way, okay? 317 00:15:23,001 --> 00:15:24,799 Yo, yo, yo, George! 318 00:15:24,800 --> 00:15:27,100 What's up with the man with the tightest rap game 319 00:15:27,101 --> 00:15:28,399 on the streets, baby? 320 00:15:28,400 --> 00:15:30,000 - What's good with you, boy? - Dude! 321 00:15:30,200 --> 00:15:31,899 What's good, baby? 322 00:15:31,900 --> 00:15:34,700 Finally, the white man is gonna school the black man 323 00:15:34,701 --> 00:15:35,599 on how to rap. 324 00:15:35,600 --> 00:15:37,599 - Yeah! - Yeah. Yeah, I guess. 325 00:15:37,600 --> 00:15:39,400 How many people are here, you think? 326 00:15:39,401 --> 00:15:40,399 I don't know, man. 327 00:15:40,400 --> 00:15:42,750 100, 200 whitey-hating, chrome-packing, 328 00:15:42,751 --> 00:15:45,099 ready to bust a cap in any white boy's ass 329 00:15:45,100 --> 00:15:47,600 - who ain't bringing that shit. - Yeah. At least. Yeah. 330 00:15:47,601 --> 00:15:48,400 Mm-hmm. Word. 331 00:15:48,600 --> 00:15:50,799 What's wrong, George? 332 00:15:50,800 --> 00:15:53,100 You ever wonder when it's time to stop living up here 333 00:15:53,101 --> 00:15:54,699 and start living down here? 334 00:15:54,700 --> 00:15:58,400 No, but what if we stop living over here and move over there? 335 00:15:58,500 --> 00:16:00,400 My Aunt ShaNeequa used to live over there, man. 336 00:16:00,401 --> 00:16:01,599 But that bitch got evicted. 337 00:16:01,600 --> 00:16:03,500 - Word? What for? - I'm dead serious. 338 00:16:03,501 --> 00:16:05,350 - Mice. - Mice? I thought she had rats. 339 00:16:05,351 --> 00:16:07,199 No, man. Rats are outside. Mice are inside. 340 00:16:07,200 --> 00:16:09,500 What if a mouse goes outside? Does it become a rat? 341 00:16:09,501 --> 00:16:11,350 If a rat is in the house, is it a mouse? 342 00:16:11,351 --> 00:16:13,200 I ain't never seen no mouse outside. 343 00:16:13,201 --> 00:16:14,600 That's because it's a rat, fool! 344 00:16:14,700 --> 00:16:17,900 Damn, you might have just made a fact just now. 345 00:16:17,901 --> 00:16:19,900 Fellas, what are you guys talking about? 346 00:16:19,901 --> 00:16:21,400 Yo, George, you need something? 347 00:16:21,500 --> 00:16:23,600 'Cause I will do anything for you. 348 00:16:24,300 --> 00:16:25,400 Anything. 349 00:16:26,700 --> 00:16:28,500 Well, about those chrome- packing, 350 00:16:28,501 --> 00:16:30,550 whitey-hating gangsters, perhaps... 351 00:16:30,551 --> 00:16:32,600 - What he need is a hype man. - Word! 352 00:16:32,601 --> 00:16:34,199 Yeah, yeah, a-come on 353 00:16:34,200 --> 00:16:35,450 You can be his Spliff Star. 354 00:16:35,451 --> 00:16:36,699 That's me. That's what I do. 355 00:16:36,700 --> 00:16:38,600 That's my job, baby! That's what I do! 356 00:16:38,601 --> 00:16:40,000 You know that. Goddamn. 357 00:16:40,001 --> 00:16:41,199 [Crash] 358 00:16:41,200 --> 00:16:42,399 I'm cool. That's what I do. 359 00:16:42,400 --> 00:16:45,599 When you a hype man, you take them hits. 360 00:16:45,600 --> 00:16:47,600 Heads or tail, playboy, what's it gonna be? 361 00:16:47,700 --> 00:16:50,000 You cannot escape your fate in the streets 362 00:16:50,001 --> 00:16:52,299 Okay, I count cash, you count sheep 363 00:16:52,300 --> 00:16:54,800 You better not sleep on the beats, capisce 364 00:16:54,801 --> 00:16:55,900 [Crowd cheering] 365 00:16:56,000 --> 00:16:57,999 All right, all right, all right! That was hot! 366 00:16:58,000 --> 00:17:00,400 That's what I'm talking about. That was hot, right? 367 00:17:00,401 --> 00:17:02,600 Right? Yo, what do we think? 368 00:17:05,100 --> 00:17:08,300 I thought you were both absolutely dreadful. 369 00:17:08,301 --> 00:17:09,250 Ghastly. 370 00:17:09,251 --> 00:17:10,200 What? 371 00:17:10,300 --> 00:17:12,700 I don't know what I'm doing here. 372 00:17:12,701 --> 00:17:15,100 This club is totally pathetic. 373 00:17:15,101 --> 00:17:16,700 [Crowd yelling] 374 00:17:23,900 --> 00:17:26,000 Everybody put your hands up 375 00:17:26,001 --> 00:17:26,999 You ready, George? 376 00:17:27,000 --> 00:17:28,799 - It's showtime, baby. - Okay. 377 00:17:28,800 --> 00:17:30,800 I just want to let you know no matter what goes on 378 00:17:30,801 --> 00:17:32,800 on that stage tonight... 379 00:17:33,600 --> 00:17:34,799 you'll always be in my heart. 380 00:17:34,800 --> 00:17:36,799 Oh, that's love. That's love right there. 381 00:17:36,800 --> 00:17:39,400 - I love you. - That's what I'm talking about. 382 00:17:41,800 --> 00:17:43,900 I love you, man. Can you feel it? 383 00:17:43,901 --> 00:17:46,000 Can you feel my love on your hip? 384 00:17:46,001 --> 00:17:47,000 Can you feel it? 385 00:17:47,100 --> 00:17:48,299 C. J: I can't get around! 386 00:17:48,300 --> 00:17:50,299 Come on, dawg! That's what I'm talkin' about! 387 00:17:50,300 --> 00:17:52,800 You go out there and you rip it tonight. All right, man? 388 00:17:52,801 --> 00:17:54,399 You do your thing tonight, all right? 389 00:17:54,400 --> 00:17:56,000 - Okay. Cool. - We shouldn't have to do that. 390 00:17:56,100 --> 00:17:57,199 We love each other. 391 00:17:57,200 --> 00:17:58,500 I'm gonna go bring you on. 392 00:17:58,501 --> 00:17:59,800 Let's do it, baby. We hyped! 393 00:18:00,300 --> 00:18:01,600 Yeah. All right, all right. 394 00:18:01,800 --> 00:18:04,400 Y'all ready for the next throwdown? 395 00:18:04,500 --> 00:18:07,050 To my left, we have the reigning champion. 396 00:18:07,051 --> 00:18:09,600 Hailing from Fort Apache in the Bronx. 397 00:18:09,601 --> 00:18:11,000 B X! What? What? What? 398 00:18:11,100 --> 00:18:13,800 Some of y'all call him "Jealous Ones Still Envy." 399 00:18:13,801 --> 00:18:16,700 Some of y'all call him the Don Cartagena! 400 00:18:16,701 --> 00:18:18,600 Some of y'all call him Joey Crack. 401 00:18:18,700 --> 00:18:19,399 Stick 'em up! 402 00:18:19,400 --> 00:18:23,500 But, tonight, let's give it up for Fat Joe! 403 00:18:25,200 --> 00:18:26,800 I got to go against him? 404 00:18:26,801 --> 00:18:28,399 Give it up! Give it up! 405 00:18:28,400 --> 00:18:30,300 What you think, they're here to see Fat Joe? 406 00:18:30,400 --> 00:18:32,399 CROWD: Joe! Joe! Joe! 407 00:18:32,400 --> 00:18:34,400 No, man, they're saying, "Go! Go! Go!" 408 00:18:35,600 --> 00:18:37,750 Now my challenger. Whoo! 409 00:18:37,751 --> 00:18:39,899 He's a farmer rapper. 410 00:18:39,900 --> 00:18:42,800 So you know he been kicking the shit all day! 411 00:18:42,801 --> 00:18:45,199 Let's give it up for my man, George! 412 00:18:45,200 --> 00:18:47,600 That's what I'm talking about! Yeah! Yeah! 413 00:18:47,601 --> 00:18:50,400 Come on, everybody! Put your hands... 414 00:18:50,401 --> 00:18:52,999 That's right. Okay, Joey Crack. 415 00:18:53,000 --> 00:18:56,200 You're the reigning champion, so you get to spit first. 416 00:18:56,201 --> 00:18:58,000 Yo, deejay, spin that shit! 417 00:18:58,001 --> 00:18:59,999 [Mid-tempo beat plays] 418 00:19:00,000 --> 00:19:01,900 These guys can't be serious right here. 419 00:19:01,901 --> 00:19:03,199 Stan and Mini-Me 420 00:19:03,200 --> 00:19:05,800 A.K.A. I hope he ain't the one you fight with 421 00:19:05,801 --> 00:19:07,399 Hey, yo, this nigga's mad corny 422 00:19:07,400 --> 00:19:10,000 And ain't got no skills, 'cause he's all right 423 00:19:10,001 --> 00:19:11,399 TOGETHER: But he's not real 424 00:19:11,400 --> 00:19:12,450 Don't mean to hurt your feelings 425 00:19:12,451 --> 00:19:13,499 But you'll never get a deal 426 00:19:13,500 --> 00:19:15,800 'Cause he's all right, but he's not real 427 00:19:15,801 --> 00:19:17,400 You're a needle in a haystack 428 00:19:17,401 --> 00:19:19,000 I'm the don, the city slicker 429 00:19:19,001 --> 00:19:20,900 Forget cows and milk your moms 430 00:19:20,901 --> 00:19:22,800 Her titties give ya that elixir 431 00:19:22,801 --> 00:19:23,800 Thought he wasn't? 432 00:19:23,900 --> 00:19:26,300 Bet this nigga end up having kids with his cousin 433 00:19:26,301 --> 00:19:28,800 Half-retarded, my number-one fan be like 434 00:19:28,801 --> 00:19:29,899 [Stammers] 435 00:19:29,900 --> 00:19:31,700 That means Fat Joe's the man 436 00:19:31,701 --> 00:19:33,500 You're a liar in denial 437 00:19:33,600 --> 00:19:36,300 Kill your ass quicker than I died in "Empire" 438 00:19:36,301 --> 00:19:38,299 How dare you want to joust with me? 439 00:19:38,300 --> 00:19:41,100 Looking like you dying of SARS or mad cow disease 440 00:19:41,101 --> 00:19:43,200 You fake B-Rabbit out to battle me 441 00:19:43,201 --> 00:19:45,000 Eight miles down the road 442 00:19:45,100 --> 00:19:46,599 The farm's thataway 443 00:19:46,600 --> 00:19:50,200 Oh! Okay, let's go! Wait a minute! 444 00:19:50,201 --> 00:19:52,300 MAHALIK: Whoo! All right! 445 00:19:52,400 --> 00:19:53,600 All right! That was hot! 446 00:19:53,700 --> 00:19:55,599 That was tight, Fat Joe. Yo! 447 00:19:55,600 --> 00:19:59,900 Now everybody give it up for my man, George! 448 00:19:59,901 --> 00:20:01,400 Deejay, spin that shit! 449 00:20:01,500 --> 00:20:03,900 - Whoo! - [Mid-tempo beat plays] 450 00:20:03,901 --> 00:20:06,300 Come on! Come on! Everybody! 451 00:20:07,500 --> 00:20:08,950 [Note plays] 452 00:20:08,951 --> 00:20:10,400 Bitch 453 00:20:10,600 --> 00:20:11,500 [Lower note plays] 454 00:20:11,501 --> 00:20:12,600 Ho 455 00:20:12,700 --> 00:20:15,600 [Notes playing] 456 00:20:23,200 --> 00:20:25,499 Now everybody in the 2-0-2 457 00:20:25,500 --> 00:20:28,600 Throw your hands in the air 'cause Fat Joe is through 458 00:20:28,601 --> 00:20:31,050 Now everybody in the 2-0-2, throw 'em up 459 00:20:31,051 --> 00:20:33,475 - Check it out. - [Chanting] Go! Go! Go! 460 00:20:33,476 --> 00:20:35,899 I'm a white boy, but my neck is red 461 00:20:35,900 --> 00:20:38,400 I put Miracle Whip on my Wonder Bread 462 00:20:38,500 --> 00:20:41,000 My face is pale, Nah, I've never been in jail 463 00:20:41,001 --> 00:20:43,100 Me and Buffy spend every winter at Vail 464 00:20:43,101 --> 00:20:45,200 How many bitches have I slapped? 465 00:20:45,201 --> 00:20:46,399 Zero, unh 466 00:20:46,400 --> 00:20:48,799 And Martha Stewart happens to be my hero 467 00:20:48,800 --> 00:20:51,400 I grew up on a farm, and I was born with no rhythm 468 00:20:51,401 --> 00:20:54,000 Dr. Phil's my uncle, and I like to hang with him 469 00:20:54,001 --> 00:20:56,599 I can't dance, I wear khaki pants 470 00:20:56,600 --> 00:20:59,200 My middle name's Lance, my grandma's from France 471 00:20:59,201 --> 00:21:01,800 So maybe I'm wack 'cause my skin ain't black 472 00:21:01,801 --> 00:21:02,799 But you can't talk smack 473 00:21:02,800 --> 00:21:04,700 'Cause whitey just struck back 474 00:21:08,000 --> 00:21:09,500 Whoo! 475 00:21:10,700 --> 00:21:13,650 That's what I'm talking about! 476 00:21:13,651 --> 00:21:16,599 MAHALIK: Give it up for George! 477 00:21:16,600 --> 00:21:18,700 That's my boy right there! That's what... 478 00:21:18,701 --> 00:21:20,300 Oh, shit. Ooh. 479 00:21:22,700 --> 00:21:24,699 [Crowd murmuring] 480 00:21:24,700 --> 00:21:26,600 George! George! The hood! 481 00:21:26,601 --> 00:21:27,899 Lose the hood! 482 00:21:27,900 --> 00:21:30,400 - I know. We're in the 'hood now! - No, man! 483 00:21:30,500 --> 00:21:31,999 He's a dead man. 484 00:21:32,000 --> 00:21:34,400 You guys feeling me? In the 'hood? 485 00:21:34,500 --> 00:21:36,450 [Crowd booing] 486 00:21:36,451 --> 00:21:38,400 Whoa! Whoa! 487 00:21:38,500 --> 00:21:40,300 Aah! 488 00:21:41,600 --> 00:21:43,499 That's it. I'm done. 489 00:21:43,500 --> 00:21:45,900 Oh, man, you can't give up rap just like that. 490 00:21:45,901 --> 00:21:47,399 Rap shmap. 491 00:21:47,400 --> 00:21:50,000 Look! You still got it! See? 492 00:21:51,000 --> 00:21:53,450 BRENDA: Thanks for coming over tonight, Cindy. 493 00:21:53,451 --> 00:21:55,899 I guess I'm just going through a rough time. 494 00:21:55,900 --> 00:22:00,000 Brenda, you want to tell me what's really bothering you? 495 00:22:01,600 --> 00:22:04,700 Well, there's something I need to... 496 00:22:04,701 --> 00:22:06,299 I saw a tape. 497 00:22:06,300 --> 00:22:08,399 I think you should know about it. 498 00:22:08,400 --> 00:22:11,200 It had these really shocking images, Cindy. 499 00:22:11,300 --> 00:22:13,799 Brenda, it was Mardi Gras. 500 00:22:13,800 --> 00:22:16,800 I never drank vodka before, and I was out of beads! 501 00:22:16,801 --> 00:22:18,799 No, not that tape, Cindy. 502 00:22:18,800 --> 00:22:21,000 Well, I guess it's just an urban legend. 503 00:22:21,001 --> 00:22:23,199 You watch it. 504 00:22:23,200 --> 00:22:25,600 And as soon as it's over, your phone rings 505 00:22:25,601 --> 00:22:27,099 and a creepy voice says... 506 00:22:27,100 --> 00:22:29,600 [Distorted voice] "You're gonna die in seven days." 507 00:22:29,601 --> 00:22:32,700 [Normal voice] And seven days later... 508 00:22:32,701 --> 00:22:34,000 When did you watch it? 509 00:22:34,100 --> 00:22:36,000 A week ago. 510 00:22:36,200 --> 00:22:37,600 A week ago tonight. 511 00:22:37,700 --> 00:22:39,400 Brenda. 512 00:22:43,400 --> 00:22:45,599 Oh, my God! 513 00:22:45,600 --> 00:22:47,600 - Oh, Brenda! - [Choking] 514 00:22:48,800 --> 00:22:51,200 Brenda! Oh, my God! 515 00:22:53,000 --> 00:22:55,200 - Oh! Oh! - [Laughs] 516 00:22:55,201 --> 00:22:57,400 Oh, my God! You bitch! 517 00:22:57,401 --> 00:22:58,799 Ketchup! 518 00:22:58,800 --> 00:23:02,000 You should have seen the look on your face! 519 00:23:02,800 --> 00:23:04,200 You got me! 520 00:23:06,700 --> 00:23:09,400 - Brenda? Brenda? - [Stammering] 521 00:23:09,401 --> 00:23:10,800 Oh, my God, Brenda! Brenda? 522 00:23:11,000 --> 00:23:12,000 [Screams] 523 00:23:20,800 --> 00:23:23,400 I can't believe you fell for that fake seizure! 524 00:23:23,401 --> 00:23:24,699 But it seemed so real! 525 00:23:24,700 --> 00:23:27,450 - It did, didn't it? - And you peed! 526 00:23:27,451 --> 00:23:30,200 Yeah! I really sold that shit, didn't I? 527 00:23:30,700 --> 00:23:33,500 I just love the look on your face when you are scared! 528 00:23:33,501 --> 00:23:35,000 Girl, you are too easy. 529 00:23:35,001 --> 00:23:36,800 - Aah! - Aah! 530 00:23:42,400 --> 00:23:45,400 I got you with the old fake hand! 531 00:23:46,300 --> 00:23:47,599 Ooh! 532 00:23:47,600 --> 00:23:48,800 Girl, you were scared! 533 00:23:48,801 --> 00:23:50,299 Well, I know! 534 00:23:50,300 --> 00:23:52,199 Oh, come on. I was just kidding. 535 00:23:52,200 --> 00:23:54,700 Well, you've taken it too far, Brenda. 536 00:23:54,701 --> 00:23:57,200 I'm gonna go get the rest of the popcorn. 537 00:24:03,200 --> 00:24:04,399 Cindy? 538 00:24:04,400 --> 00:24:07,100 Oh, forget it. I am not falling for it again. 539 00:24:23,500 --> 00:24:25,499 Oh, come on. 540 00:24:25,500 --> 00:24:27,499 Cindy, the news is on. 541 00:24:27,500 --> 00:24:30,300 Another little white girl done fell down a well. 542 00:24:30,301 --> 00:24:33,100 50 black people get their ass beat by police today, 543 00:24:33,101 --> 00:24:35,150 but the whole world got to stop 544 00:24:35,151 --> 00:24:37,200 for one little whitey down a hole. 545 00:24:41,100 --> 00:24:42,700 Cindy! 546 00:24:44,700 --> 00:24:47,200 The TV's leaking! 547 00:24:48,400 --> 00:24:49,599 Cindy? 548 00:24:49,600 --> 00:24:52,000 Cindy, something's wrong here. 549 00:25:07,200 --> 00:25:10,700 Cindy, this bitch is messing up my floor! 550 00:25:12,200 --> 00:25:13,999 [Whimpers] 551 00:25:14,000 --> 00:25:15,700 Cindy, help me! 552 00:25:15,701 --> 00:25:17,400 I'm not listening. 553 00:25:19,600 --> 00:25:21,400 Get up, you little ugly bitch, 554 00:25:21,401 --> 00:25:23,800 Come on! Let me see what you got! 555 00:25:23,801 --> 00:25:26,200 What you gonna do? That's all? 556 00:25:26,800 --> 00:25:28,600 Ooh! 557 00:25:29,200 --> 00:25:32,000 Ooh! I'm whipping her ass, Cindy! 558 00:25:32,001 --> 00:25:33,200 Yeah! What's up? 559 00:25:33,201 --> 00:25:34,950 [Grunts] 560 00:25:34,951 --> 00:25:36,700 Ooh! 561 00:25:44,800 --> 00:25:46,599 Aah! 562 00:25:46,600 --> 00:25:49,199 Cindy, please help me! 563 00:25:49,200 --> 00:25:51,200 - Cindy! - [Telephone rings] 564 00:25:51,201 --> 00:25:53,500 Okay. Hang on a second. 565 00:25:53,501 --> 00:25:54,399 Hello? 566 00:25:54,400 --> 00:25:57,000 Father Muldoon here. We're getting along famously. 567 00:25:57,001 --> 00:25:59,100 Thanks again, Father. Bye-bye. 568 00:25:59,101 --> 00:26:00,800 Brenda? 569 00:26:01,200 --> 00:26:02,800 Brenda? 570 00:26:05,200 --> 00:26:06,800 Brenda? 571 00:26:12,300 --> 00:26:14,600 Aah! 572 00:26:19,200 --> 00:26:20,799 GEORGE: Oh, my God. 573 00:26:20,800 --> 00:26:22,400 Yes. Yes. Of course I'll tell her. 574 00:26:22,401 --> 00:26:24,000 Thank you. 575 00:26:25,500 --> 00:26:27,600 Sue's teacher, Brenda. 576 00:26:27,601 --> 00:26:28,500 She's... 577 00:26:28,501 --> 00:26:29,400 She's dead. 578 00:26:29,500 --> 00:26:32,000 Oh. I better tell her. 579 00:26:32,100 --> 00:26:34,000 No, no, no. I can do it. 580 00:26:39,500 --> 00:26:41,050 Sue? 581 00:26:41,051 --> 00:26:42,599 Yes? 582 00:26:42,600 --> 00:26:44,800 You know your teacher, Miss Brenda? 583 00:26:44,801 --> 00:26:45,599 Yeah. 584 00:26:45,600 --> 00:26:47,900 - She's dead! - Aah! 585 00:26:47,901 --> 00:26:49,099 Gone forever! 586 00:26:49,100 --> 00:26:51,399 Died a horrible, painful death! 587 00:26:51,400 --> 00:26:54,000 Gone, gone, gone, just like your dog! 588 00:26:54,100 --> 00:26:55,199 My dog's dead? 589 00:26:55,200 --> 00:26:58,800 I just ran him over with the car when I drove in! 590 00:26:58,801 --> 00:27:01,200 Everyone you love around you is dying! 591 00:27:01,201 --> 00:27:03,600 - Aah! - Aah! 592 00:27:10,000 --> 00:27:12,199 Hello, Father. 593 00:27:12,200 --> 00:27:14,199 Don't call me Father. 594 00:27:14,200 --> 00:27:16,600 I haven't been a clergyman since... 595 00:27:18,800 --> 00:27:21,799 I'm sorry about that night. 596 00:27:21,800 --> 00:27:23,600 If I hadn't fallen asleep while driving 597 00:27:23,601 --> 00:27:25,999 for that exact 20 minutes. 598 00:27:26,000 --> 00:27:29,600 If I hadn't drank that exact whole bottle of Jรคgermeister. 599 00:27:29,601 --> 00:27:32,400 If only I hadn't killed that hooker. 600 00:27:32,401 --> 00:27:34,299 Sayaman. 601 00:27:34,300 --> 00:27:36,400 I don't see what any of this has to do with Annie. 602 00:27:36,401 --> 00:27:39,199 I'm sorry. Those were other nights. 603 00:27:39,200 --> 00:27:44,200 But if it had been that night, I might have missed her. 604 00:27:44,201 --> 00:27:45,500 That terrible night. 605 00:27:45,501 --> 00:27:46,800 [Whimpers] 606 00:27:47,000 --> 00:27:49,600 ["Mexican Hat Dance" plays] 607 00:27:51,400 --> 00:27:52,700 Hey! 608 00:28:05,000 --> 00:28:06,400 It's your wife, Father. 609 00:28:06,500 --> 00:28:08,000 She's hurt. 610 00:28:08,001 --> 00:28:08,799 Annie? 611 00:28:08,800 --> 00:28:11,900 She was hit by a truck, and she's pinned against a tree. 612 00:28:11,901 --> 00:28:12,800 I don't understand. 613 00:28:13,000 --> 00:28:17,000 As long as the truck has her pinned, she'll stay alive. 614 00:28:17,001 --> 00:28:18,600 I still don't get it. 615 00:28:22,400 --> 00:28:26,300 This is your wife. 616 00:28:27,400 --> 00:28:29,400 She broke her wiener? 617 00:28:31,100 --> 00:28:34,700 Look what happens to the taco. 618 00:28:35,600 --> 00:28:38,800 Look, I don't understand all this fancy medical lingo. 619 00:28:38,801 --> 00:28:40,600 I want to see Annie. 620 00:28:41,400 --> 00:28:43,600 She's split in half. 621 00:28:43,700 --> 00:28:48,300 You mean like down-the-middle in half? 622 00:28:48,301 --> 00:28:49,199 At the waist. 623 00:28:49,200 --> 00:28:53,600 You mean this is the last time I can talk to the top half? 624 00:28:53,700 --> 00:28:55,000 Yes. 625 00:28:55,100 --> 00:28:58,700 The truck is the only thing that is holding her together. 626 00:28:58,701 --> 00:29:01,999 Let's say this is her bottom half. 627 00:29:02,000 --> 00:29:04,800 Can I squeeze in a few minutes with that? 628 00:29:04,900 --> 00:29:07,650 I'm not sure what you mean. 629 00:29:07,651 --> 00:29:10,400 - Let me explain. - Tom. 630 00:29:10,401 --> 00:29:12,000 Go to her. 631 00:29:19,400 --> 00:29:22,400 Tom, I'll need a ride home. 632 00:29:25,400 --> 00:29:28,600 Hey, baby. How's it going? 633 00:29:28,601 --> 00:29:30,800 Oh, I'm dying, Tom. 634 00:29:30,801 --> 00:29:33,200 Don't talk like that. 635 00:29:33,201 --> 00:29:35,600 The truck barely hit you. 636 00:29:35,601 --> 00:29:37,600 [Coughs] Honey. 637 00:29:37,700 --> 00:29:40,200 Kiss me one last time. 638 00:29:42,800 --> 00:29:45,900 Promise me you'll never remarry. 639 00:29:45,901 --> 00:29:48,299 I promise. 640 00:29:48,300 --> 00:29:50,700 And no sex, either. 641 00:29:51,200 --> 00:29:53,500 I'm sorry. I didn't catch that. 642 00:29:53,501 --> 00:29:54,799 [Grunts] No sex. 643 00:29:54,800 --> 00:29:56,799 Honey, you're not speaking clearly. 644 00:29:56,800 --> 00:29:58,699 - Your injuries must be awful. - No sex. 645 00:29:58,700 --> 00:30:02,300 Oh, cruel fate to shroud my wife's dying words in mystery. 646 00:30:02,301 --> 00:30:04,200 - No sex! - Poor Annie. 647 00:30:04,201 --> 00:30:05,199 We hardly knew her. 648 00:30:05,200 --> 00:30:07,400 - She'll be missed terribly. - Oh, Jesus. 649 00:30:07,401 --> 00:30:09,600 That's right, honey. Go into the light. 650 00:30:09,601 --> 00:30:10,699 Look! 651 00:30:10,700 --> 00:30:13,400 Just tell George, swing away. 652 00:30:13,401 --> 00:30:15,199 Right. Swing away. 653 00:30:15,200 --> 00:30:17,800 Oh, sure. That you understand. 654 00:30:17,801 --> 00:30:19,799 [Gasps] 655 00:30:19,800 --> 00:30:22,200 Annie? Annie! 656 00:30:23,900 --> 00:30:25,650 I'm sorry, dude. 657 00:30:25,651 --> 00:30:27,399 Don't call me dude. 658 00:30:27,400 --> 00:30:29,800 I'm not a stoner anymore. Not since... 659 00:30:29,801 --> 00:30:31,800 ["Mexican Hat Dance" plays] 660 00:30:31,801 --> 00:30:33,400 Goodbye, Tom. 661 00:30:34,800 --> 00:30:36,299 [Tires screech] 662 00:30:36,300 --> 00:30:39,100 [Sheep bleating, crash] 663 00:30:39,101 --> 00:30:40,700 [Horn blaring] 664 00:30:40,800 --> 00:30:44,900 Amazing grace 665 00:30:44,901 --> 00:30:48,999 How sweet... 666 00:30:49,000 --> 00:30:51,399 I'm so sorry, Mr. and Mrs. Meeks. 667 00:30:51,400 --> 00:30:54,200 Brenda was a good friend when she was alive. 668 00:30:54,201 --> 00:30:56,300 [Crying] My sweet, sweet Brenda. 669 00:30:56,301 --> 00:30:58,400 She looks so peaceful. 670 00:30:58,401 --> 00:31:00,000 Oh... 671 00:31:02,700 --> 00:31:06,400 If only God had taken us instead of our daughter. 672 00:31:06,401 --> 00:31:08,800 And knowing your Brenda like I did, 673 00:31:08,801 --> 00:31:11,200 I'd say she wishes the same thing. 674 00:31:12,300 --> 00:31:14,399 These just came today. 675 00:31:14,400 --> 00:31:17,100 Photos from a trip she took. 676 00:31:20,300 --> 00:31:21,199 They're blank. 677 00:31:21,200 --> 00:31:23,800 Turn them around, honey. 678 00:31:23,801 --> 00:31:25,000 Oh. 679 00:31:25,100 --> 00:31:26,750 Yes, of course. 680 00:31:26,751 --> 00:31:28,399 Who's this? 681 00:31:28,400 --> 00:31:31,400 That's Ralph. He's right over there. 682 00:31:37,000 --> 00:31:37,999 Cody? 683 00:31:38,000 --> 00:31:41,899 It's a boy. He's going to be an asshole. 684 00:31:41,900 --> 00:31:45,200 Smoke all you want. You're gonna get hit by a bus. 685 00:31:45,201 --> 00:31:48,000 That's not fooling anyone. 686 00:31:49,600 --> 00:31:50,699 Cindy. 687 00:31:50,700 --> 00:31:52,000 - George. - Hey. 688 00:31:52,100 --> 00:31:54,800 Sue wanted to pay her respects to her teacher. 689 00:31:55,600 --> 00:31:56,699 You? 690 00:31:56,700 --> 00:31:58,000 Brenda was my bitch. 691 00:31:58,001 --> 00:31:59,000 Of course. 692 00:32:00,400 --> 00:32:01,999 Hmm. 693 00:32:02,000 --> 00:32:03,199 Are you okay? 694 00:32:03,200 --> 00:32:05,599 It's just the open coffin. 695 00:32:05,600 --> 00:32:07,600 I can't believe they leave it out here like this. 696 00:32:07,601 --> 00:32:09,599 - George, it's a wake! - Awake?! 697 00:32:09,600 --> 00:32:11,800 - Brenda! It's a miracle! - No! George, stop! 698 00:32:11,900 --> 00:32:13,199 I thought you were dead! 699 00:32:13,200 --> 00:32:16,399 Sue, your teacher's alive! Hello?! 700 00:32:16,400 --> 00:32:19,600 I got your back, George! I got your back! 701 00:32:19,601 --> 00:32:20,399 She's alive! 702 00:32:20,400 --> 00:32:21,999 I'll tell you what! 703 00:32:22,000 --> 00:32:23,900 - Oh! - [Crowd gasping] 704 00:32:25,400 --> 00:32:27,400 GEORGE: Mahalik! She's alive! Brenda! 705 00:32:27,401 --> 00:32:28,800 George, stop! She's dead! 706 00:32:28,801 --> 00:32:30,200 No! We won't lose you again! 707 00:32:30,201 --> 00:32:32,600 Mahalik, help! 708 00:32:32,601 --> 00:32:33,599 Nothing! 709 00:32:33,600 --> 00:32:35,600 - Ooh! - [Screams] 710 00:32:36,700 --> 00:32:38,200 She's not breathing! 711 00:32:38,201 --> 00:32:39,000 No! 712 00:32:39,100 --> 00:32:41,200 Live, damn it! Live! 713 00:32:42,300 --> 00:32:44,200 Live, damn it! Live! 714 00:32:45,500 --> 00:32:47,350 Let me open her windpipe! 715 00:32:47,351 --> 00:32:48,975 MRS. MEEKS: No! Oh, God! 716 00:32:48,976 --> 00:32:50,600 Charles! Charles, stop them! 717 00:32:50,601 --> 00:32:52,400 Breathe! 718 00:32:54,300 --> 00:32:57,000 Someone stop them! What are they doing?! 719 00:32:57,001 --> 00:32:58,599 Get up! 720 00:32:58,600 --> 00:33:00,700 She's alive! She's alive! 721 00:33:00,701 --> 00:33:03,250 Wake up! Breathe! 722 00:33:03,251 --> 00:33:05,800 [All shouting] 723 00:33:12,200 --> 00:33:14,800 - Charles! Charles! - Clear! 724 00:33:14,900 --> 00:33:16,800 No! 725 00:33:18,600 --> 00:33:21,099 Aah! 726 00:33:21,100 --> 00:33:23,100 I got something! I got something! 727 00:33:23,101 --> 00:33:26,300 [Gasps, screams] 728 00:33:28,800 --> 00:33:30,199 Aah! 729 00:33:30,200 --> 00:33:31,500 - That's it! - George! 730 00:33:31,600 --> 00:33:34,400 That's the last time I try to bring anyone back from the dead. 731 00:33:34,401 --> 00:33:36,350 George, don't get down on yourself. 732 00:33:36,351 --> 00:33:38,300 I know you were only trying to help. 733 00:33:38,400 --> 00:33:41,400 You're a good, caring person. 734 00:33:41,401 --> 00:33:43,500 Which is why I like you. 735 00:33:43,501 --> 00:33:44,799 Oh, thanks, Cindy. 736 00:33:44,800 --> 00:33:47,099 But I don't want to screw your life up, too. 737 00:33:47,100 --> 00:33:49,000 The most caring thing I could do for everyone right now 738 00:33:49,001 --> 00:33:51,300 is to just get out of here. 739 00:33:51,301 --> 00:33:53,600 George! What about Sue? 740 00:33:54,300 --> 00:33:56,400 Oh, yes. Of course. 741 00:33:56,500 --> 00:33:58,200 Once I get Sue, then... 742 00:33:58,201 --> 00:33:59,400 Wait! 743 00:34:01,200 --> 00:34:04,000 I could really use a friend right now. 744 00:34:06,700 --> 00:34:10,200 Brenda's gone. Cody resents me. 745 00:34:10,800 --> 00:34:14,000 And I'm caught up in something I can't even... 746 00:34:14,001 --> 00:34:15,999 Oh, God, it's so hard! 747 00:34:16,000 --> 00:34:20,600 Well, you're beautiful and you're pressing up against me. 748 00:34:21,800 --> 00:34:24,299 Look, Cindy. 749 00:34:24,300 --> 00:34:27,100 I know you'd never consider going out with a guy like me. 750 00:34:27,101 --> 00:34:31,400 But if you're not too busy tomorrow night... 751 00:34:33,100 --> 00:34:35,200 Is that a yes? 752 00:34:35,201 --> 00:34:36,600 Yes. 753 00:34:41,900 --> 00:34:45,600 Cindy, did Brenda ever talk to you about a tape? 754 00:34:45,700 --> 00:34:47,399 She did mention something. 755 00:34:47,400 --> 00:34:49,600 Do you mind if I go upstairs and look around? 756 00:34:49,601 --> 00:34:51,899 Yes, go. Of course. Go. 757 00:34:51,900 --> 00:34:54,500 Cody, I'll be right back, okay? 758 00:34:54,501 --> 00:34:57,050 You're getting lucky tonight. 759 00:34:57,051 --> 00:34:59,600 He doesn't know you're a guy. 760 00:34:59,601 --> 00:35:02,000 [Thunder crashes] 761 00:35:54,600 --> 00:35:56,500 [Thud] 762 00:35:56,501 --> 00:35:58,000 Oh, shit. 763 00:35:58,001 --> 00:35:59,500 [Splash] 764 00:36:09,500 --> 00:36:11,450 [Stammering] 765 00:36:11,451 --> 00:36:13,400 [Vomiting] 766 00:36:14,300 --> 00:36:15,800 [Growls] 767 00:36:23,100 --> 00:36:25,100 [Telephone ringing] 768 00:36:36,000 --> 00:36:37,599 Hello? 769 00:36:37,600 --> 00:36:39,000 [Man speaking indistinctly] 770 00:36:39,001 --> 00:36:41,400 What? Willie Mays? 771 00:36:41,401 --> 00:36:42,799 [Mumbling] 772 00:36:42,800 --> 00:36:44,800 Who's gay? Hello? 773 00:36:44,801 --> 00:36:46,400 [Mumbling] 774 00:36:46,401 --> 00:36:47,400 What? 775 00:36:47,500 --> 00:36:48,800 Can you hear me now? 776 00:36:48,801 --> 00:36:49,999 Kind of. 777 00:36:50,000 --> 00:36:52,000 - Can you hear me now? - Yes. Perfect. 778 00:36:52,001 --> 00:36:53,300 Seven days. 779 00:36:53,301 --> 00:36:54,600 Seven days. 780 00:36:54,700 --> 00:36:56,600 Oh, my God. I'm gonna die next Monday? 781 00:36:56,601 --> 00:36:57,899 Yes. No. Wait. 782 00:36:57,900 --> 00:37:00,000 Monday. That would be seven business days. 783 00:37:00,001 --> 00:37:01,999 This is seven days starting now. 784 00:37:02,000 --> 00:37:04,800 So seven days to this very hour? My watch broke. 785 00:37:04,801 --> 00:37:06,000 How am I gonna know the exact hour? 786 00:37:06,200 --> 00:37:08,799 Forget hours. This day seven days from now. 787 00:37:08,800 --> 00:37:11,500 But there's a holiday coming up. Do you count the holiday? 788 00:37:11,501 --> 00:37:13,200 Well, that depends. What holiday? 789 00:37:13,300 --> 00:37:15,199 - Martin Luther King Day. - Then no. 790 00:37:15,200 --> 00:37:17,599 Why not? Everybody at work is taking it off. 791 00:37:17,600 --> 00:37:19,799 Jesus Christ, lady. I'm giving you seven friggin' days. 792 00:37:19,800 --> 00:37:22,300 I can come over now and kill the shit out of you if you'd rather. 793 00:37:22,301 --> 00:37:24,600 [Click, dial tone] 794 00:37:26,400 --> 00:37:28,350 Yo, George, I don't care what you say, man. 795 00:37:28,351 --> 00:37:30,300 I'm signing you up for another rap battle. 796 00:37:30,400 --> 00:37:32,799 Mahalik, I told you. That part of my life is over. 797 00:37:32,800 --> 00:37:35,200 I said the same thing about getting with C.J.'s sister. 798 00:37:35,201 --> 00:37:37,600 - I'm still hitting that. - He's still hitting it, man! 799 00:37:37,601 --> 00:37:39,600 And she fine as shit! That's my sister! What? 800 00:37:39,800 --> 00:37:41,099 It doesn't matter. I'm done. 801 00:37:41,100 --> 00:37:43,600 - So what are you gonna do? - I don't know. 802 00:37:43,601 --> 00:37:45,499 [Laughs] 803 00:37:45,500 --> 00:37:48,199 Yeah! Yeah! A-come on! 804 00:37:48,200 --> 00:37:51,200 Maybe my brother was right. Maybe I should just settle down. 805 00:37:51,201 --> 00:37:53,199 [Laughing] 806 00:37:53,200 --> 00:37:54,600 - What's up, then?! - Mother... 807 00:37:54,601 --> 00:37:55,600 I got another one, y'all. 808 00:37:55,800 --> 00:37:59,200 Yo, George, man, you can't focus on that shit, man. 809 00:37:59,201 --> 00:38:01,200 - Let that go. - [Laughing] 810 00:38:01,300 --> 00:38:04,300 Hey, you got to try this shit, George. 811 00:38:05,100 --> 00:38:06,600 Ow! 812 00:38:08,000 --> 00:38:09,600 Yo, man, you got to take the lid off! 813 00:38:09,800 --> 00:38:12,200 - Oh, yes. Of course. - Sorry! 814 00:38:12,201 --> 00:38:13,800 [Cell phone rings] 815 00:38:13,801 --> 00:38:14,399 Hello? 816 00:38:14,400 --> 00:38:17,200 CINDY: George, something terrible has happened! 817 00:38:18,300 --> 00:38:19,199 [Gasps] 818 00:38:19,200 --> 00:38:21,000 Cindy, are you okay? What's going on? 819 00:38:21,001 --> 00:38:22,799 George, you have to help me. 820 00:38:22,800 --> 00:38:25,399 I just watched the same tape that killed Brenda. 821 00:38:25,400 --> 00:38:28,800 Then the phone rang, and this voice said I was gonna die. 822 00:38:28,801 --> 00:38:31,200 Cindy, there's no such thing as a killer videotape. 823 00:38:31,201 --> 00:38:32,900 - Oh. - Hell, yeah, there is! 824 00:38:32,901 --> 00:38:34,450 I know somebody who can help you. 825 00:38:34,451 --> 00:38:35,999 - You do? Who? - Wait up, man. 826 00:38:36,000 --> 00:38:39,000 I heard Jamal from 90th street watched that tape last week. 827 00:38:39,001 --> 00:38:40,300 This morning he woke up dead. 828 00:38:40,400 --> 00:38:41,999 How in the hell do you wake up dead? 829 00:38:42,000 --> 00:38:43,999 'Cause you're alive when you go to sleep. 830 00:38:44,000 --> 00:38:46,800 You're telling me you can go to bed dead and wake up alive? 831 00:38:46,801 --> 00:38:48,399 MAHALIK: You can't go to bed dead! 832 00:38:48,400 --> 00:38:50,600 - That shit would be redundant. - No, it wouldn't. 833 00:38:50,601 --> 00:38:52,700 'Cause you can go to bed and not be dead. 834 00:38:52,701 --> 00:38:54,400 And you can die but not be in a bed. 835 00:38:54,401 --> 00:38:55,599 But you are in a bed, man. 836 00:38:55,600 --> 00:38:58,200 That's how you wake up dead in the first place! 837 00:38:58,201 --> 00:39:00,800 Damn! That's some quantum shit right there, man! 838 00:39:00,801 --> 00:39:03,099 You should be teaching classes! 839 00:39:03,100 --> 00:39:05,200 - Just tell me who can help me! - Damn! 840 00:39:05,201 --> 00:39:06,200 My Aunt ShaNeequa. 841 00:39:06,300 --> 00:39:07,999 Her and her man into this weird shit. 842 00:39:08,000 --> 00:39:10,700 They saw the tape before anybody else knew about it. 843 00:39:10,701 --> 00:39:13,600 - Go see them tonight. - Tonight? Yeah. 844 00:39:13,601 --> 00:39:15,800 But who will take care of Cody? 845 00:39:17,200 --> 00:39:19,200 CODY: George, we're gonna have so much fun. 846 00:39:19,300 --> 00:39:21,100 I have some puzzles and board games 847 00:39:21,101 --> 00:39:22,699 and baseball cards in my room 848 00:39:22,700 --> 00:39:24,300 and this really cool model airplane. 849 00:39:24,301 --> 00:39:25,750 - I'm gonna go get it. - Sure. 850 00:39:25,751 --> 00:39:27,199 Okay, so I made him a snack. 851 00:39:27,200 --> 00:39:30,000 You can give him some warm milk if he can't go to sleep. 852 00:39:30,001 --> 00:39:31,600 - Everything's gonna be fine. - Here it is. 853 00:39:31,601 --> 00:39:34,200 I'm great with kids. Heads up, Cody. 854 00:39:34,201 --> 00:39:35,999 Ugh! 855 00:39:36,000 --> 00:39:38,800 - Oh, I left some numbers. - I'm okay. 856 00:39:38,801 --> 00:39:40,199 Ugh! 857 00:39:40,200 --> 00:39:42,000 Sorry. You okay, kiddo? 858 00:39:42,100 --> 00:39:44,200 That a boy. 859 00:39:46,000 --> 00:39:49,200 - [Tires screech, horn honks] - And I guess that's it. 860 00:39:49,201 --> 00:39:51,600 - Okay, I'm off. - Right. 861 00:39:51,601 --> 00:39:53,099 You know, it's funny. 862 00:39:53,100 --> 00:39:57,100 All a child ever really wants is a family. 863 00:39:57,101 --> 00:39:58,200 Yo. 864 00:39:58,800 --> 00:40:00,200 Cody really likes you. 865 00:40:00,201 --> 00:40:01,600 Oh, he's a good kid. 866 00:40:01,601 --> 00:40:03,550 Yeah. 867 00:40:03,551 --> 00:40:05,499 Oh! 868 00:40:05,500 --> 00:40:07,400 - Bye. - Bye. 869 00:40:08,300 --> 00:40:10,700 - [Door closes] - [Exhales deeply] 870 00:40:22,300 --> 00:40:24,000 Hello? 871 00:40:24,100 --> 00:40:25,199 I know. 872 00:40:25,200 --> 00:40:28,200 You're Cindy. Be right with you. 873 00:40:28,201 --> 00:40:29,800 Aunt ShaNeequa? 874 00:40:29,801 --> 00:40:32,299 Bingo. 875 00:40:32,300 --> 00:40:33,950 But you can call me the Oracle. 876 00:40:33,951 --> 00:40:35,599 And don't worry about that vase. 877 00:40:35,600 --> 00:40:38,000 What vase? Oh! Sorry. I didn't know. 878 00:40:38,001 --> 00:40:40,300 Oh! Aah! 879 00:40:40,301 --> 00:40:42,600 That vase. 880 00:40:43,500 --> 00:40:45,500 Please, sit. 881 00:40:47,900 --> 00:40:48,800 [Farts] 882 00:40:50,400 --> 00:40:52,800 It was the chair. 883 00:40:52,801 --> 00:40:53,999 Mmm. 884 00:40:54,000 --> 00:40:57,300 [Farting loudly] 885 00:40:57,301 --> 00:41:00,600 Yes, the chair. 886 00:41:01,200 --> 00:41:03,000 I know why you've come. 887 00:41:03,100 --> 00:41:05,799 A great mystery lies ahead of you, 888 00:41:05,800 --> 00:41:08,250 but you must not shy away from the challenge. 889 00:41:08,251 --> 00:41:10,700 - Only you can be the one... - [Door opens] 890 00:41:10,701 --> 00:41:12,300 [Volume on TV increases] 891 00:41:12,400 --> 00:41:13,800 - Orpheus? - What, baby? 892 00:41:13,801 --> 00:41:15,599 Sweetie? 893 00:41:15,600 --> 00:41:17,500 I'm watching the game. 894 00:41:19,000 --> 00:41:20,300 Do you mind? 895 00:41:22,400 --> 00:41:24,700 The Lakers will win by 12. 896 00:41:26,700 --> 00:41:29,750 - So can you tell me about... - The tape? 897 00:41:29,751 --> 00:41:32,799 - Yes. I watched it and... - The phone rang. 898 00:41:32,800 --> 00:41:36,600 - Right. Then this voice said... - That you would die. 899 00:41:36,601 --> 00:41:38,800 - Okay, that's getting... - Extremely annoying. 900 00:41:38,801 --> 00:41:39,899 Yeah. 901 00:41:39,900 --> 00:41:41,599 Try being married to her. 902 00:41:41,600 --> 00:41:45,200 I catch shit about women I ain't slept with yet. 903 00:41:46,200 --> 00:41:48,000 You made a copy of the tape. Let's see it. 904 00:41:48,100 --> 00:41:49,900 Yes. Okay. 905 00:41:56,000 --> 00:41:57,499 ShaNeequa, can you tell me if... 906 00:41:57,500 --> 00:42:01,350 The tape is connected to the crop circles and the aliens? 907 00:42:01,351 --> 00:42:05,200 Yes. But it's up to you to discover how for yourself. 908 00:42:05,300 --> 00:42:06,300 Look, it's a... 909 00:42:06,400 --> 00:42:08,199 SHANEEQU A: Cigarette? 910 00:42:08,200 --> 00:42:10,800 I was going to say lighthouse. 911 00:42:11,500 --> 00:42:14,400 ORPHEUS: Find that lighthouse. It's your destiny. 912 00:42:16,300 --> 00:42:17,200 Wait. 913 00:42:17,400 --> 00:42:19,200 What is that? 914 00:42:23,400 --> 00:42:25,200 Oh, my God. 915 00:42:26,200 --> 00:42:27,600 [Fly buzzes] 916 00:42:43,400 --> 00:42:45,600 There we go. Ugh! 917 00:42:47,000 --> 00:42:48,800 Now, baby. 918 00:42:49,200 --> 00:42:51,400 I knew that was gonna happen. 919 00:42:51,401 --> 00:42:53,400 Uh-oh. Come on. 920 00:42:53,401 --> 00:42:54,999 [Whistling] 921 00:42:55,000 --> 00:42:56,000 SHANEEQU A: Oh, hell, no. 922 00:42:56,100 --> 00:42:59,400 Get your ass out of the TV! What's wrong with you? 923 00:42:59,401 --> 00:43:00,900 I'm gonna teach you! 924 00:43:00,901 --> 00:43:02,399 Get out of that TV! 925 00:43:02,400 --> 00:43:04,800 Baby, no! No! Let her go! Let her go! 926 00:43:04,900 --> 00:43:07,050 Let her go! We gonna get another lawsuit. 927 00:43:07,051 --> 00:43:09,200 She spit on me. I'm gonna kill the bitch. 928 00:43:09,201 --> 00:43:10,299 Ah! 929 00:43:10,300 --> 00:43:11,500 You won. You won. 930 00:43:11,600 --> 00:43:13,100 You won. You won. 931 00:43:13,101 --> 00:43:14,350 - Upstairs. - Okay. 932 00:43:14,351 --> 00:43:15,600 - Down low. - Okay. 933 00:43:15,800 --> 00:43:17,199 - All right. - Baby, no! 934 00:43:17,200 --> 00:43:20,000 - Kill her! Is you crazy? - Baby! 935 00:43:20,001 --> 00:43:22,800 [Laughs] What you gonna brush now? 936 00:43:22,801 --> 00:43:24,200 What you gonna brush now, huh? 937 00:43:24,201 --> 00:43:25,199 Come on, baby! 938 00:43:25,200 --> 00:43:28,200 You picked the wrong TV to come out of. 939 00:43:32,700 --> 00:43:35,400 George? Cody? 940 00:43:35,401 --> 00:43:36,800 Oh! 941 00:43:37,900 --> 00:43:39,599 George? 942 00:43:39,600 --> 00:43:41,600 - Ow! - What happened? 943 00:43:41,601 --> 00:43:43,199 I don't know. 944 00:43:43,200 --> 00:43:45,200 Cody and I were playing a fun game, 945 00:43:45,201 --> 00:43:46,800 and then I looked down. 946 00:43:46,801 --> 00:43:49,100 [Gasps] Yahtzee! 947 00:43:55,400 --> 00:43:57,100 No! 948 00:43:58,200 --> 00:43:59,800 Oh, my God! 949 00:44:00,000 --> 00:44:01,600 How could you let him watch the tape? 950 00:44:01,700 --> 00:44:03,200 [Telephone ringing] 951 00:44:10,600 --> 00:44:11,799 Hello? 952 00:44:11,800 --> 00:44:15,599 - MAN: It's me. How you doing? - Fine. 953 00:44:15,600 --> 00:44:18,400 Enjoying your last week? I can't wait to see you. 954 00:44:18,401 --> 00:44:21,399 - Six days now, right? - Yeah. 955 00:44:21,400 --> 00:44:23,800 It was great catching up. Can I speak to Cody? 956 00:44:23,801 --> 00:44:25,999 Why? He didn't watch the tape. 957 00:44:26,000 --> 00:44:29,000 Yes, he did. Come on, Cindy, I do this for a living. 958 00:44:29,001 --> 00:44:30,800 Leave us alone! 959 00:44:31,500 --> 00:44:33,000 [Rings] 960 00:44:35,600 --> 00:44:36,599 Hello? 961 00:44:36,600 --> 00:44:38,300 Hello, I'm calling from "Reader's Digest" 962 00:44:38,400 --> 00:44:40,000 with a fantastic offer for Cody. 963 00:44:40,001 --> 00:44:41,599 - [Snickering] - Aah! 964 00:44:41,600 --> 00:44:44,400 No, you're not! You're that evil little girl from the tape! 965 00:44:44,500 --> 00:44:46,299 [Laughs] Okay, you got me. 966 00:44:46,300 --> 00:44:48,000 How about I just leave a message for him? 967 00:44:48,001 --> 00:44:49,600 Fine. 968 00:44:50,600 --> 00:44:52,399 Uh-huh. 969 00:44:52,400 --> 00:44:56,000 Yeah. Okay, how do you spell that? 970 00:44:56,001 --> 00:44:56,799 Right. 971 00:44:56,800 --> 00:45:00,000 Okay, got it. Bye-bye. 972 00:45:02,400 --> 00:45:05,000 Aaaah! 973 00:45:05,500 --> 00:45:06,950 I can't believe you let that happen. 974 00:45:06,951 --> 00:45:08,400 I know. I'm sorry. I screwed up. 975 00:45:08,600 --> 00:45:10,599 Listen, we can still save him. 976 00:45:10,600 --> 00:45:12,600 The answer to the tape, to your crop circles, 977 00:45:12,601 --> 00:45:14,199 is at a lighthouse. 978 00:45:14,200 --> 00:45:16,000 Oh, you think I'm crazy, don't you? 979 00:45:16,001 --> 00:45:16,999 Of course I do. 980 00:45:17,000 --> 00:45:20,000 But the last thing you need now is a screw-up like me. 981 00:45:20,001 --> 00:45:21,800 I'm gonna leave for good. 982 00:45:21,801 --> 00:45:23,000 Wait. 983 00:45:24,700 --> 00:45:28,400 Well, what should I tell Cody? 984 00:45:28,401 --> 00:45:29,200 Let him down easy. 985 00:45:29,400 --> 00:45:31,400 Tell him I got called away on business. 986 00:45:31,401 --> 00:45:33,099 You'll think of something. 987 00:45:33,100 --> 00:45:35,600 Testicular cancer. He won't ask questions. 988 00:45:35,700 --> 00:45:37,400 I knew you'd understand. 989 00:45:37,401 --> 00:45:38,850 George! 990 00:45:38,851 --> 00:45:40,425 Just... 991 00:45:40,426 --> 00:45:42,000 be careful. 992 00:45:42,100 --> 00:45:44,600 Something weird is going on at your farm. I know it. 993 00:45:44,601 --> 00:45:45,800 I don't know. 994 00:45:45,900 --> 00:45:48,200 Sometimes a sheep needs pushed through the fence. 995 00:45:48,201 --> 00:45:50,400 - What? - Goodbye, Cindy. 996 00:45:52,200 --> 00:45:54,400 [Girl chanting] 997 00:46:14,000 --> 00:46:17,199 - Sue? - I can't sleep. 998 00:46:17,200 --> 00:46:20,200 Well, it's way past your bedtime. 999 00:46:21,900 --> 00:46:26,000 Won't you rock me to sleep in your big, strong arms? 1000 00:46:27,500 --> 00:46:30,400 There's plenty of room under the covers. 1001 00:46:30,401 --> 00:46:32,399 It's a hot night. 1002 00:46:32,400 --> 00:46:34,800 You don't need to wear pajamas. 1003 00:46:36,400 --> 00:46:37,599 Where is my daughter? 1004 00:46:37,600 --> 00:46:40,000 Are you mad? I am your daughter. 1005 00:46:40,001 --> 00:46:41,600 No, you're not! 1006 00:46:41,601 --> 00:46:42,600 Aaaah! 1007 00:46:42,700 --> 00:46:43,899 Aah! 1008 00:46:43,900 --> 00:46:46,700 Come here! What did you do with Sue? 1009 00:46:46,701 --> 00:46:48,200 I didn't touch her. I swear. 1010 00:46:48,201 --> 00:46:49,399 I don't believe you! 1011 00:46:49,400 --> 00:46:51,900 Please! For God's sake, she's a girl! 1012 00:46:51,901 --> 00:46:53,600 You sick... 1013 00:46:54,400 --> 00:46:55,600 Oh! 1014 00:47:07,000 --> 00:47:08,300 [Giggles] 1015 00:47:12,300 --> 00:47:14,699 - Aah! - Daddy! 1016 00:47:14,700 --> 00:47:16,800 How do you like it, huh? 1017 00:47:16,801 --> 00:47:18,800 Having fun? 1018 00:47:18,801 --> 00:47:19,900 Aaah! 1019 00:47:20,000 --> 00:47:21,200 [Thud] 1020 00:47:34,300 --> 00:47:36,800 Tom, are you... 1021 00:47:37,600 --> 00:47:39,100 What in the world? 1022 00:47:39,101 --> 00:47:40,300 Shh! 1023 00:47:42,000 --> 00:47:43,999 Look. 1024 00:47:44,000 --> 00:47:45,900 What is that thing? 1025 00:47:46,000 --> 00:47:47,999 I don't know. 1026 00:47:48,000 --> 00:47:50,800 Maybe Cindy was right. 1027 00:48:05,200 --> 00:48:07,799 Please, sir. All I need is five minutes. 1028 00:48:07,800 --> 00:48:11,100 And I told you, Campbell, no more paranoid on-air rants 1029 00:48:11,101 --> 00:48:13,599 - about the supernatural. - I know. 1030 00:48:13,600 --> 00:48:16,000 This station is about sex, violence, and the weather. 1031 00:48:16,001 --> 00:48:17,599 Yes. That reminds me. 1032 00:48:17,600 --> 00:48:20,400 We're gonna need that "Porn Star Shot Dead in a Hurricane" story. 1033 00:48:20,500 --> 00:48:21,999 One hour. 1034 00:48:22,000 --> 00:48:24,399 GIGGINS: Meanwhile, a tornado in Charleston 1035 00:48:24,400 --> 00:48:27,000 threatens a clothing-optional beach where just yesterday 1036 00:48:27,001 --> 00:48:29,199 a naked couple was brutally murdered. 1037 00:48:29,200 --> 00:48:32,000 This just five miles from where the last naked couple 1038 00:48:32,001 --> 00:48:33,600 was brutally murdered. 1039 00:48:33,601 --> 00:48:35,400 Turning now to sports. 1040 00:48:35,401 --> 00:48:37,199 And an evil videotape 1041 00:48:37,200 --> 00:48:40,400 that kills anyone who watches it in seven days. 1042 00:48:40,401 --> 00:48:42,350 It's true. We're all in danger. 1043 00:48:42,351 --> 00:48:44,299 - There's an alien force - Oh, no. 1044 00:48:44,300 --> 00:48:46,700 that's trying prevent you from knowing the truth. 1045 00:48:46,701 --> 00:48:47,750 Campbell, are you insane? 1046 00:48:47,751 --> 00:48:48,799 It's a horrible fate. 1047 00:48:48,800 --> 00:48:50,000 Carson, I have to do this. 1048 00:48:50,100 --> 00:48:51,999 Correction, there really is no danger. 1049 00:48:52,000 --> 00:48:54,800 Actually, I didn't really mean anything I just said. 1050 00:48:54,801 --> 00:48:57,199 Yes, I did. Every word of it. 1051 00:48:57,200 --> 00:48:59,600 Everyone watching this could be dead in a week. 1052 00:48:59,601 --> 00:49:01,200 Oh, shizl gzngahr. 1053 00:49:01,201 --> 00:49:03,100 [Blabbering] 1054 00:49:09,800 --> 00:49:13,600 469. I been cleaning after this dumb-ass cracker Giggins 1055 00:49:13,700 --> 00:49:14,600 for 10 years. 1056 00:49:14,700 --> 00:49:17,200 But I been hitting it with his woman for 12. 1057 00:49:17,201 --> 00:49:18,800 Know what I'm saying, nigga? 1058 00:49:18,801 --> 00:49:20,400 She likes her some chocolate. 1059 00:49:20,500 --> 00:49:23,400 Sharpton for president, y'all. I'm outie. 1060 00:49:23,401 --> 00:49:24,799 Peace. 1061 00:49:24,800 --> 00:49:28,400 HARRIS: An evil videotape that kills people in 7 days. 1062 00:49:28,401 --> 00:49:29,999 Alien forces threatening the world. 1063 00:49:30,000 --> 00:49:31,999 And who the hell is this Cindy Campbell? 1064 00:49:32,000 --> 00:49:34,800 If what she says is true, we're facing an unprecedented crisis. 1065 00:49:34,801 --> 00:49:35,800 Get me the president. 1066 00:49:35,900 --> 00:49:36,999 You are the president. 1067 00:49:37,000 --> 00:49:39,400 Good. Then I already know about this. 1068 00:49:39,401 --> 00:49:40,400 Let's order lunch. 1069 00:49:40,600 --> 00:49:43,099 Sir, I think you need to go on TV 1070 00:49:43,100 --> 00:49:46,700 and convince the people that there is no such thing as a UFO. 1071 00:49:46,701 --> 00:49:48,600 Don't spell in front of me, damn it. 1072 00:49:48,601 --> 00:49:49,899 Aliens, sir. 1073 00:49:49,900 --> 00:49:52,000 There's no such thing as aliens. 1074 00:49:52,100 --> 00:49:53,899 - That's not quite true. - Sir? 1075 00:49:53,900 --> 00:49:56,799 A year ago, a UFO crash-landed in New Mexico. 1076 00:49:56,800 --> 00:49:59,900 - A body may have been recovered. - "May have been"? 1077 00:49:59,901 --> 00:50:02,400 Well, there was a terrible mix-up. 1078 00:50:02,401 --> 00:50:04,299 It was Thanksgiving. 1079 00:50:04,300 --> 00:50:06,699 The body was sent down to the kitchen. 1080 00:50:06,700 --> 00:50:10,400 They shoved stuffing up its ass, and we ate it at a state dinner. 1081 00:50:10,401 --> 00:50:12,000 That's the last I saw of it. 1082 00:50:12,001 --> 00:50:13,399 No, scratch that. 1083 00:50:13,400 --> 00:50:15,400 There were some sandwiches made the next day. 1084 00:50:15,500 --> 00:50:16,599 Mr. President! 1085 00:50:16,600 --> 00:50:18,200 - Listen to me. - Agent Thompson! 1086 00:50:18,201 --> 00:50:19,499 Back away from that window! 1087 00:50:19,500 --> 00:50:21,850 What? Did I forget to put my pants on again? 1088 00:50:21,851 --> 00:50:24,200 No, sir. It's just a feeling I've been having 1089 00:50:24,201 --> 00:50:25,799 since the news about the aliens. 1090 00:50:25,800 --> 00:50:28,400 - Something's not right. - I know what you mean. 1091 00:50:28,401 --> 00:50:31,000 It's like that feeling that something's not right. 1092 00:50:32,000 --> 00:50:33,899 What is it? 1093 00:50:33,900 --> 00:50:35,950 Some old Tupac, sir. 1094 00:50:35,951 --> 00:50:37,999 [Hip-hop music plays] 1095 00:50:38,000 --> 00:50:42,600 "All eyez on me." Hey, this shit is banging. 1096 00:50:42,601 --> 00:50:45,000 Thank you, sir. I appreciate it. 1097 00:51:13,000 --> 00:51:15,000 - [Air horn blows] - Oh! 1098 00:51:55,900 --> 00:51:58,000 Hello, Cindy. 1099 00:52:00,000 --> 00:52:02,599 I am the Architect. 1100 00:52:02,600 --> 00:52:04,650 You have many questions. 1101 00:52:04,651 --> 00:52:06,699 ["Jeopardy!" theme plays] 1102 00:52:06,700 --> 00:52:09,500 I've been watching you for a very long time. 1103 00:52:10,800 --> 00:52:12,200 So I see. 1104 00:52:12,300 --> 00:52:15,200 What is the connection between the crop circles and the tape? 1105 00:52:15,201 --> 00:52:16,299 The answer is simple. 1106 00:52:16,300 --> 00:52:18,699 You are the eventuality of an anomaly. 1107 00:52:18,700 --> 00:52:21,200 You are inexorably seeking a sedulant probability. 1108 00:52:21,201 --> 00:52:22,199 Sedulant? 1109 00:52:22,200 --> 00:52:23,899 Grotesquerie? No? 1110 00:52:23,900 --> 00:52:25,900 What about contingent affirmation? 1111 00:52:25,901 --> 00:52:28,900 - That's got to mean something. - Hey! 1112 00:52:28,901 --> 00:52:31,900 Hey! You put cameras in my bathroom? 1113 00:52:31,901 --> 00:52:33,599 [Gasps] 1114 00:52:33,600 --> 00:52:35,199 What is this? 1115 00:52:35,200 --> 00:52:38,800 Oh, my God. Well, it was a long winter. 1116 00:52:38,801 --> 00:52:39,900 This is an invasion of... Ow! 1117 00:52:40,000 --> 00:52:41,199 Oh, sorry. 1118 00:52:41,200 --> 00:52:43,600 I can't help it. It's very lonely in here. 1119 00:52:43,700 --> 00:52:47,100 Ergo, I haven't been with anyone in a very long time, 1120 00:52:47,101 --> 00:52:48,700 not counting myself. 1121 00:52:48,701 --> 00:52:51,050 Or this chair. 1122 00:52:51,051 --> 00:52:53,400 I call her... 1123 00:52:53,401 --> 00:52:54,599 Linda. 1124 00:52:54,600 --> 00:52:57,100 Could you just cut to the chase? I'm kind of in a rush. 1125 00:52:57,101 --> 00:52:59,250 Why? You can always sleep over if you want. 1126 00:52:59,251 --> 00:53:01,325 Linda's built for two, and she vibrates. 1127 00:53:01,326 --> 00:53:03,400 Stop it! Just tell me what I need to know. 1128 00:53:03,401 --> 00:53:04,700 Who is that little girl? 1129 00:53:04,701 --> 00:53:06,600 Okay, okay. 1130 00:53:08,200 --> 00:53:11,600 My wife and I wanted a child, but she couldn't get pregnant. 1131 00:53:11,601 --> 00:53:13,400 Neither could I. 1132 00:53:13,500 --> 00:53:14,599 So you adopted. 1133 00:53:14,600 --> 00:53:17,000 We loved our daughter, but she was evil. 1134 00:53:17,001 --> 00:53:19,400 Made the horses crazy, killed our puppies, 1135 00:53:19,401 --> 00:53:20,500 hid the remote. 1136 00:53:20,501 --> 00:53:21,599 Really sick shit. 1137 00:53:21,600 --> 00:53:23,500 My wife took her to the old family farm 1138 00:53:23,501 --> 00:53:25,399 and drowned her in the well. 1139 00:53:25,400 --> 00:53:28,800 I felt a simple time-out would have been sufficient. 1140 00:53:28,801 --> 00:53:32,200 But Tabitha imprinted her evil on a videotape. 1141 00:53:32,201 --> 00:53:34,300 I never meant for it to get out, but... 1142 00:53:34,301 --> 00:53:35,799 But what? 1143 00:53:35,800 --> 00:53:38,400 I put it in the wrong box and returned it to Blockbuster, 1144 00:53:38,401 --> 00:53:40,199 instead of my copy of "Pootie Tang." 1145 00:53:40,200 --> 00:53:43,100 It's been circulating and killing ever since. 1146 00:53:43,101 --> 00:53:45,000 Just like "Pootie Tang." 1147 00:53:46,000 --> 00:53:47,800 But what does this have to do with aliens? 1148 00:53:47,801 --> 00:53:48,799 I don't know. 1149 00:53:48,800 --> 00:53:51,500 Perhaps Tabitha's summoning them to kill us all. 1150 00:53:51,501 --> 00:53:53,999 An alien invasion? 1151 00:53:54,000 --> 00:53:55,399 I have to warn the world. 1152 00:53:55,400 --> 00:53:58,300 It's already begun. You're too late. 1153 00:53:58,301 --> 00:53:59,899 Oh, my God. 1154 00:53:59,900 --> 00:54:03,200 But not too late to make an old man happy. 1155 00:54:03,900 --> 00:54:05,999 What? 1156 00:54:06,000 --> 00:54:08,700 And now reports of lights in the sky. 1157 00:54:08,701 --> 00:54:10,799 Glimpses of spacecraft. 1158 00:54:10,800 --> 00:54:15,000 Possible alien sightings being reported all over the world. 1159 00:54:15,001 --> 00:54:16,000 Are they aliens? 1160 00:54:16,200 --> 00:54:18,600 The first video images are coming in. 1161 00:54:18,601 --> 00:54:20,399 Disturbing home video tonight 1162 00:54:20,400 --> 00:54:22,800 from a ranch outside Sydney, Australia. 1163 00:54:22,801 --> 00:54:25,100 Watch very carefully now. 1164 00:54:25,101 --> 00:54:26,199 There it is. 1165 00:54:26,200 --> 00:54:27,500 Let's see that again. 1166 00:54:28,800 --> 00:54:30,699 Very, very disturbing. 1167 00:54:30,700 --> 00:54:34,000 And this just in from Sao Paulo, Brazil. 1168 00:54:36,300 --> 00:54:38,000 Let's see that again. 1169 00:54:42,700 --> 00:54:46,000 Very, very disturbing. 1170 00:54:46,100 --> 00:54:48,700 And this just in from South Texas. 1171 00:54:52,700 --> 00:54:54,399 Do they pose a threat? 1172 00:54:54,400 --> 00:54:56,700 Only one thing's for certain. 1173 00:54:56,701 --> 00:54:58,750 We are all going to be killed. 1174 00:54:58,751 --> 00:55:00,799 We have to board up the house. 1175 00:55:00,800 --> 00:55:02,900 HARRIS: Are you sure this is necessary, Wilson? 1176 00:55:02,901 --> 00:55:04,999 Having an awards ceremony at a time like this? 1177 00:55:05,000 --> 00:55:08,199 Yes, sir. Everything must appear business as usual. 1178 00:55:08,200 --> 00:55:11,100 The nation, while not yet panicked, is deeply disturbed. 1179 00:55:11,101 --> 00:55:12,850 Right. We can steer that course, 1180 00:55:12,851 --> 00:55:14,600 keeping everybody deeply disturbed. 1181 00:55:14,601 --> 00:55:15,799 We don't want a panic. 1182 00:55:15,800 --> 00:55:18,200 Very few presidents have faced a crisis like this. 1183 00:55:18,201 --> 00:55:21,100 I wonder what President Ford would've done. 1184 00:55:21,101 --> 00:55:23,000 Well, if the buck stops here... 1185 00:55:23,001 --> 00:55:24,800 the buck stops here. 1186 00:55:27,000 --> 00:55:29,900 Thank you all, and welcome to the White House. 1187 00:55:29,901 --> 00:55:32,399 The Mother Teresa Awards 1188 00:55:32,400 --> 00:55:34,399 recognize those who have overcome 1189 00:55:34,400 --> 00:55:36,600 the severest handicaps and disadvantages 1190 00:55:36,601 --> 00:55:38,800 to help others in their communities. 1191 00:55:38,900 --> 00:55:41,999 The young, the old. Black and white. 1192 00:55:42,000 --> 00:55:44,600 Our Native American friends. Hey, how are you? 1193 00:55:44,601 --> 00:55:47,200 [Chanting] Hey, how are you? Hey, how are you? 1194 00:55:47,201 --> 00:55:48,400 Hey, how are you? 1195 00:55:48,500 --> 00:55:51,799 Ah. Well, it is therefore my honor 1196 00:55:51,800 --> 00:55:56,600 to present each and every one of you with this symbol of merit. 1197 00:56:01,400 --> 00:56:03,400 The room is secure, Mr. President. 1198 00:56:03,401 --> 00:56:05,499 - Or is it? - Sir? 1199 00:56:05,500 --> 00:56:06,799 I've been thinking, Thompson. 1200 00:56:06,800 --> 00:56:09,200 What if the aliens could take over human bodies? 1201 00:56:09,201 --> 00:56:10,700 They'd look just like us. 1202 00:56:10,800 --> 00:56:12,000 Or almost. 1203 00:56:12,100 --> 00:56:13,499 I never thought of that, sir. 1204 00:56:13,500 --> 00:56:15,800 We should be on alert for anything suspicious. 1205 00:56:15,801 --> 00:56:17,100 They could be anywhere. 1206 00:56:17,101 --> 00:56:18,300 Even... 1207 00:56:18,301 --> 00:56:19,450 Right here. 1208 00:56:19,451 --> 00:56:20,600 My God. 1209 00:56:20,700 --> 00:56:22,399 We'd never see the attack coming. 1210 00:56:22,400 --> 00:56:25,800 - It's frightening, sir! - Don't panic. 1211 00:56:25,801 --> 00:56:29,200 We'll just move slowly toward the exit. 1212 00:56:30,200 --> 00:56:32,800 [Mechanized voice] At last we meet, Mr. President. 1213 00:56:32,900 --> 00:56:34,250 It's happening. I knew it. 1214 00:56:34,251 --> 00:56:35,600 You'll never take me alive! 1215 00:56:35,601 --> 00:56:36,799 Aaaah! 1216 00:56:36,800 --> 00:56:39,100 Ah! She's scrambling my brain! 1217 00:56:39,101 --> 00:56:40,400 I'll get her! 1218 00:56:41,600 --> 00:56:43,399 Aaah! 1219 00:56:43,400 --> 00:56:46,000 Oh, no, you don't! Not on my watch! 1220 00:56:46,001 --> 00:56:47,600 Good work, sir! 1221 00:56:49,200 --> 00:56:51,500 Good God! The small ones have metal teeth! 1222 00:56:51,501 --> 00:56:53,900 Jerry's kids, my ass! 1223 00:56:54,700 --> 00:56:56,399 WILSON: Mr. President! 1224 00:56:56,400 --> 00:56:59,400 Mr. President, have you gone completely insane? 1225 00:56:59,401 --> 00:57:00,799 Like a fox. 1226 00:57:00,800 --> 00:57:03,000 We got to talk to the person who saw this coming, 1227 00:57:03,001 --> 00:57:04,000 Cindy Campbell. 1228 00:57:04,200 --> 00:57:05,800 She knows how to defeat the aliens. 1229 00:57:05,801 --> 00:57:07,900 - Filthy, rotten scum! - Aah! 1230 00:57:07,901 --> 00:57:09,350 Aah! You're hideous! 1231 00:57:09,351 --> 00:57:10,799 Get off my planet! 1232 00:57:10,800 --> 00:57:13,600 - No! - Is everything all right? 1233 00:57:13,601 --> 00:57:14,800 The exits are all blocked. 1234 00:57:14,801 --> 00:57:16,700 I'll find one, sir. 1235 00:57:16,701 --> 00:57:18,600 Everybody, clear! 1236 00:57:20,600 --> 00:57:23,399 This way, sir! God, this is exciting! 1237 00:57:23,400 --> 00:57:26,300 You're excited? You should feel my nipples. 1238 00:57:26,301 --> 00:57:27,999 Cody? 1239 00:57:28,000 --> 00:57:31,100 Cody? Cody, where are you? 1240 00:57:31,101 --> 00:57:32,199 Honey? 1241 00:57:32,200 --> 00:57:34,400 GIGGINS: After today's incident in the East Room, 1242 00:57:34,401 --> 00:57:36,999 the White House is now advising all citizens 1243 00:57:37,000 --> 00:57:40,700 to board up their homes and prepare for an alien invasion. 1244 00:57:40,701 --> 00:57:42,400 Oh, no. 1245 00:57:42,600 --> 00:57:44,999 And now a News 8 exclusive. 1246 00:57:45,000 --> 00:57:47,200 The killer videotape you've been hearing about. 1247 00:57:47,201 --> 00:57:48,800 We're the only station that has it, 1248 00:57:48,900 --> 00:57:50,399 and we're showing it all night. 1249 00:57:50,400 --> 00:57:52,400 Very exciting. Let's roll it again. 1250 00:57:56,600 --> 00:57:58,800 There. Nobody's getting through that sucker. 1251 00:57:58,801 --> 00:58:01,200 But we have to get down to the cellar. 1252 00:58:02,400 --> 00:58:04,150 - George. - Cindy. 1253 00:58:04,151 --> 00:58:05,900 There's no time. 1254 00:58:06,000 --> 00:58:07,199 Cody. 1255 00:58:07,200 --> 00:58:09,199 Thank God. I've been worried sick. 1256 00:58:09,200 --> 00:58:11,800 He showed up about an hour ago. I tried to call. 1257 00:58:11,801 --> 00:58:13,399 No, he didn't. 1258 00:58:13,400 --> 00:58:15,400 Okay, but I was gonna. 1259 00:58:15,500 --> 00:58:17,199 No, he wasn't. 1260 00:58:17,200 --> 00:58:20,700 Cody, the point is you can't just run away like that. 1261 00:58:20,701 --> 00:58:22,400 I wanted to be with George. 1262 00:58:22,600 --> 00:58:25,200 Oh, honey, I know you want a dad, but... 1263 00:58:25,300 --> 00:58:28,200 Oh, trust me, Cody, I'm not good at anything. 1264 00:58:28,201 --> 00:58:29,600 Why would I be good at that? 1265 00:58:29,601 --> 00:58:31,900 SUE: Uncle George! 1266 00:58:43,600 --> 00:58:46,000 It's gonna be okay, Cody. 1267 00:58:46,001 --> 00:58:48,399 I'm going to die, aren't I? 1268 00:58:48,400 --> 00:58:51,200 Cody, did I ever tell you what your mom said 1269 00:58:51,201 --> 00:58:53,200 about you the day you were born? 1270 00:58:53,201 --> 00:58:54,300 No. 1271 00:58:54,400 --> 00:58:56,800 I was in the delivery room with her. 1272 00:58:56,801 --> 00:58:58,599 She was having a hard time. 1273 00:58:58,600 --> 00:59:00,200 Then you began to come out of her. 1274 00:59:01,100 --> 00:59:03,200 And your mom screamed and screamed in pain. 1275 00:59:03,201 --> 00:59:04,900 She yelled, "Just kill me. 1276 00:59:04,901 --> 00:59:06,600 Bludgeon me with a bedpan. 1277 00:59:06,700 --> 00:59:09,400 Whatever you do, put me out of this pain." 1278 00:59:09,401 --> 00:59:11,499 She was gushing torrents of blood. 1279 00:59:11,500 --> 00:59:14,200 I have this all on tape if you want to see it someday. 1280 00:59:14,201 --> 00:59:15,999 Well, finally you came out. 1281 00:59:16,000 --> 00:59:18,800 Your mom cut your umbilical cord herself. 1282 00:59:18,900 --> 00:59:21,799 Well, on the second try. 1283 00:59:21,800 --> 00:59:24,400 The first time she snipped your penis in half. 1284 00:59:24,401 --> 00:59:25,900 After all, she was drunk. 1285 00:59:25,901 --> 00:59:27,200 Actually, drugged. 1286 00:59:27,400 --> 00:59:30,400 We'd been out the night before celebrating St. Patrick's Day. 1287 00:59:30,401 --> 00:59:32,600 She thought, "Hey, I never tasted crystal meth." 1288 00:59:32,601 --> 00:59:34,400 So she did just a little. 1289 00:59:34,500 --> 00:59:35,600 My penis? 1290 00:59:35,601 --> 00:59:36,399 Yes. 1291 00:59:36,400 --> 00:59:39,000 They sewed it on upside down. 1292 00:59:39,001 --> 00:59:40,799 So that's why I pee up? 1293 00:59:40,800 --> 00:59:42,199 Yes. We'll get it fixed, honey. 1294 00:59:42,200 --> 00:59:45,100 It's on my list of things. Right after we get TiVo. 1295 00:59:45,101 --> 00:59:46,799 Anyway, there you were. 1296 00:59:46,800 --> 00:59:49,150 Your mom turned to me and said, 1297 00:59:49,151 --> 00:59:51,500 "Hey, you want him? Take him." 1298 00:59:51,501 --> 00:59:53,050 Then she died. 1299 00:59:53,051 --> 00:59:54,925 And I took you. 1300 00:59:54,926 --> 00:59:56,799 Do you know why? 1301 00:59:56,800 --> 00:59:58,399 I had just lost my cat in a fire, 1302 00:59:58,400 --> 01:00:00,300 and I needed something to pet and feed. 1303 01:00:00,301 --> 01:00:03,100 And I miss that cat, Cody. 1304 01:00:03,101 --> 01:00:04,599 But I love you. 1305 01:00:04,600 --> 01:00:06,699 And nothing's ever gonna change that, 1306 01:00:06,700 --> 01:00:09,200 not even the very painful death we're about to experience. 1307 01:00:09,201 --> 01:00:10,800 TOM: George! 1308 01:00:12,300 --> 01:00:14,000 [Banging] 1309 01:00:18,700 --> 01:00:19,599 Are they gone? 1310 01:00:19,600 --> 01:00:20,800 I don't hear anything. 1311 01:00:20,801 --> 01:00:22,000 [Banging] 1312 01:00:27,200 --> 01:00:28,600 [Screams effeminately] 1313 01:00:28,601 --> 01:00:29,899 Don't worry, Sue. 1314 01:00:29,900 --> 01:00:31,100 SUE: It was Uncle George. 1315 01:00:31,200 --> 01:00:33,800 Well, it's scary. 1316 01:00:35,000 --> 01:00:37,200 Good work, Sue. 1317 01:00:37,300 --> 01:00:39,500 I don't know what stupid, idiotic thing 1318 01:00:39,501 --> 01:00:41,499 made these lights go off. 1319 01:00:41,500 --> 01:00:44,000 All right, there's spare fuses in the crawl space. 1320 01:00:44,001 --> 01:00:45,500 I can get these lights back on. 1321 01:00:45,501 --> 01:00:46,700 [Banging] 1322 01:00:46,800 --> 01:00:49,200 Quick, George, grab that railroad tie. 1323 01:00:49,201 --> 01:00:50,800 Jam it against the door. 1324 01:00:51,200 --> 01:00:52,400 - Oh! - [Gasps] 1325 01:00:52,401 --> 01:00:54,699 My balls! 1326 01:00:54,700 --> 01:00:56,800 Oh! Not those! 1327 01:00:56,801 --> 01:00:58,200 Jesus! 1328 01:00:58,201 --> 01:00:59,600 No! 1329 01:01:00,700 --> 01:01:01,600 SUE: Uncle George! 1330 01:01:01,601 --> 01:01:02,999 I'm scared! 1331 01:01:03,000 --> 01:01:05,800 Oh, sweetie, come here. It's okay. 1332 01:01:05,801 --> 01:01:07,399 Aah! 1333 01:01:07,400 --> 01:01:10,400 There's something on the other side of the door. 1334 01:01:23,200 --> 01:01:25,200 I can't see anything. 1335 01:01:40,200 --> 01:01:41,400 Oh, my God. 1336 01:01:41,500 --> 01:01:43,050 Can you see them? 1337 01:01:43,051 --> 01:01:44,599 They're horrible. 1338 01:01:44,600 --> 01:01:46,700 They're grayish with big black eyes. 1339 01:01:46,701 --> 01:01:48,400 Their teeth are grotesque. 1340 01:01:48,401 --> 01:01:49,999 [Trilling] 1341 01:01:50,000 --> 01:01:53,400 - I think they're giggling. - What? 1342 01:01:54,000 --> 01:01:55,000 Oh, no. 1343 01:01:55,100 --> 01:01:57,499 Oh, no, I think... 1344 01:01:57,500 --> 01:02:00,000 - I think they want... - [Banging] 1345 01:02:01,500 --> 01:02:03,099 Aaah! Help! 1346 01:02:03,100 --> 01:02:04,700 Cody! Oh, my God! 1347 01:02:04,800 --> 01:02:07,099 George. Swing away, George. 1348 01:02:07,100 --> 01:02:09,000 - Aah! Aunt Cindy, help! - I'm coming, Cody. 1349 01:02:09,001 --> 01:02:10,400 I'll save you. 1350 01:02:10,401 --> 01:02:11,800 - Ugh! - Die! 1351 01:02:14,800 --> 01:02:15,600 Die! 1352 01:02:15,800 --> 01:02:17,650 You damn aliens, let him go! 1353 01:02:17,651 --> 01:02:19,525 You're not getting in here! 1354 01:02:19,526 --> 01:02:21,400 - What else you got? - George. 1355 01:02:21,401 --> 01:02:23,499 There! Had enough? 1356 01:02:23,500 --> 01:02:26,000 Yeah. Forget it, Cody. Thank me later. 1357 01:02:26,100 --> 01:02:27,800 Oh, Cody. Oh, thank God. 1358 01:02:27,900 --> 01:02:28,850 Come on. 1359 01:02:28,851 --> 01:02:29,800 SUE: Daddy! 1360 01:02:29,900 --> 01:02:31,200 - Daddy! - Sue! 1361 01:02:34,000 --> 01:02:35,200 Oh! 1362 01:02:35,400 --> 01:02:37,499 Mahalik, what are you doing here? 1363 01:02:37,500 --> 01:02:40,050 I told you the hood's always got your back. 1364 01:02:40,051 --> 01:02:42,600 Thank God. There's two of them at the door. 1365 01:02:42,601 --> 01:02:43,400 They're gone. 1366 01:02:44,700 --> 01:02:46,450 Good. They couldn't get in. 1367 01:02:46,451 --> 01:02:48,175 I hear they can't open doors. 1368 01:02:48,176 --> 01:02:49,899 They mastered space flight, 1369 01:02:49,900 --> 01:02:51,950 but they can't get through a wooden door? 1370 01:02:51,951 --> 01:02:54,000 Oh, look, the cellar's the safest place. 1371 01:02:54,001 --> 01:02:55,900 Women and children stay here. 1372 01:02:55,901 --> 01:02:57,800 - Ugh! - All right, and the men, 1373 01:02:57,801 --> 01:02:59,199 we go outside and fight. 1374 01:02:59,200 --> 01:03:01,800 Right. And what's the cutoff age for children? 1375 01:03:01,801 --> 01:03:03,250 Come on! 1376 01:03:03,251 --> 01:03:04,700 [Groans] 1377 01:03:15,600 --> 01:03:16,799 [Rustling] 1378 01:03:16,800 --> 01:03:19,200 - [Shovel cocks] - Follow me. 1379 01:03:26,000 --> 01:03:27,200 [Tires screeching] 1380 01:03:31,800 --> 01:03:32,799 I'm sorry. 1381 01:03:32,800 --> 01:03:35,200 I thought I was hitting the brake. 1382 01:03:35,300 --> 01:03:38,200 Now, we don't have to go through insurance, do we? 1383 01:03:38,201 --> 01:03:40,200 Mr. President, what are you doing here? 1384 01:03:40,201 --> 01:03:41,599 I'm looking for Cindy Campbell. 1385 01:03:41,600 --> 01:03:43,999 She may hold the key to defeating the aliens. 1386 01:03:44,000 --> 01:03:48,000 Ah, good. The Air Force is here with those new round planes. 1387 01:03:49,100 --> 01:03:51,900 We don't have round planes, sir. 1388 01:03:51,901 --> 01:03:53,350 Oh, my God. 1389 01:03:53,351 --> 01:03:54,800 Oh, my God. 1390 01:03:55,000 --> 01:03:58,000 - [Hip-hop music plays] - Wait. Do you hear that? 1391 01:03:58,100 --> 01:04:00,400 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah 1392 01:04:00,401 --> 01:04:02,800 Ah, ah, ah, ah 1393 01:04:02,900 --> 01:04:06,000 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah 1394 01:04:07,200 --> 01:04:09,199 - Yo, what's up, George? - C.J.! 1395 01:04:09,200 --> 01:04:11,900 I told you the 'hood always got your back. 1396 01:04:11,901 --> 01:04:14,600 I got the boys with me. Get out the car, man. 1397 01:04:14,601 --> 01:04:15,500 Who we gonna shoot? 1398 01:04:15,600 --> 01:04:16,800 Is y'all ready to go step? 1399 01:04:16,900 --> 01:04:19,150 Let's go do this, 'cause I'm hyped right now! 1400 01:04:19,151 --> 01:04:21,400 - Real hyped! - You stepped on my shoe, bitch! 1401 01:04:21,401 --> 01:04:22,400 Call me "bitch" again, 1402 01:04:22,600 --> 01:04:25,500 and I'll park your truck dead in your ass. 1403 01:04:25,501 --> 01:04:26,199 Damn, homey! 1404 01:04:26,200 --> 01:04:28,599 - In the cornfield. - They're coming! 1405 01:04:28,600 --> 01:04:30,700 Me and my boys, we gonna take care of this. 1406 01:04:30,701 --> 01:04:32,000 Come on, let's go. 1407 01:04:32,200 --> 01:04:34,199 Son, I'd bust this shit right now. 1408 01:04:34,200 --> 01:04:35,899 - Your mama! - I got your number, homey. 1409 01:04:35,900 --> 01:04:38,000 - We over here, y'all! - He ain't gonna bust nothing. 1410 01:04:38,001 --> 01:04:39,200 I got nuts bigger than him. 1411 01:04:39,400 --> 01:04:42,199 Whoa, country-ass, maple-syrup nigga. 1412 01:04:42,200 --> 01:04:45,500 Yeah, you want some biscuits? You want some biscuits? 1413 01:04:46,700 --> 01:04:48,800 Get down! Get down! 1414 01:04:56,000 --> 01:04:58,000 I can't believe what I just saw. 1415 01:04:58,001 --> 01:04:59,999 These men died for their country. 1416 01:05:00,000 --> 01:05:03,200 Send flowers to their bitches and hos. 1417 01:05:07,500 --> 01:05:09,499 I can't break free! 1418 01:05:09,500 --> 01:05:13,200 Think! They must have some kind of weakness. 1419 01:05:16,700 --> 01:05:17,650 - Huh? - Huh? 1420 01:05:17,651 --> 01:05:18,600 I found it! 1421 01:05:18,700 --> 01:05:20,600 Without their heads, they're powerless! 1422 01:05:20,601 --> 01:05:22,399 Please, no. We mean you no harm. 1423 01:05:22,400 --> 01:05:25,200 We traveled to your planet to find an evil little girl. 1424 01:05:25,300 --> 01:05:28,150 We must destroy her before seven days. 1425 01:05:28,151 --> 01:05:30,999 You mean you watched the videotape? 1426 01:05:31,000 --> 01:05:33,500 Our satellite picked up what we thought was "Pootie Tang." 1427 01:05:33,501 --> 01:05:34,800 That was a week ago. 1428 01:05:35,000 --> 01:05:40,000 And now our entire race will die unless the girl is destroyed. 1429 01:05:40,100 --> 01:05:42,999 Oh, see? They are peaceful. 1430 01:05:43,000 --> 01:05:46,000 If they're so peaceful, why were they choking us? 1431 01:05:46,100 --> 01:05:48,050 Oh, that's how we say hello. 1432 01:05:48,051 --> 01:05:50,000 - Hello! - Nice to see you. 1433 01:05:50,001 --> 01:05:51,999 - Hello. - Hello. 1434 01:05:52,000 --> 01:05:53,900 Well, how do you guys say goodbye? 1435 01:05:54,000 --> 01:05:55,199 Oh! 1436 01:05:55,200 --> 01:05:57,799 [Groans] I had to ask. 1437 01:05:57,800 --> 01:06:02,700 If you think that's strange, you should see how we pee. 1438 01:06:02,701 --> 01:06:05,100 [Choking] 1439 01:06:08,200 --> 01:06:11,600 So we're not so different after all. 1440 01:06:14,000 --> 01:06:15,900 There's something about this place. 1441 01:06:15,901 --> 01:06:18,400 It's like I've seen it before. 1442 01:06:20,200 --> 01:06:22,000 Oh, my God. 1443 01:06:25,400 --> 01:06:27,400 This used to be their farm. 1444 01:06:27,401 --> 01:06:29,200 She died right here. 1445 01:06:43,100 --> 01:06:45,500 There's something down there. 1446 01:06:55,600 --> 01:06:57,200 Ugh! 1447 01:07:08,400 --> 01:07:12,000 Hey, awesome. Yeah, you got it. 1448 01:07:12,001 --> 01:07:13,100 Just look at this. 1449 01:07:13,200 --> 01:07:16,400 Human beings and aliens working together. 1450 01:07:16,500 --> 01:07:19,800 We're all just one big galactic family. 1451 01:07:19,801 --> 01:07:21,599 Family. 1452 01:07:21,600 --> 01:07:23,600 That's just what I've been running away from. 1453 01:07:23,601 --> 01:07:26,800 Well, that's because you're an idiot. 1454 01:07:36,200 --> 01:07:38,199 This is it. 1455 01:07:38,200 --> 01:07:40,300 ARCHITECT: My wife took her to the family farm 1456 01:07:40,301 --> 01:07:42,400 and drowned her in the well. 1457 01:07:45,600 --> 01:07:50,400 The little girl. She's frightened of the well. 1458 01:07:53,400 --> 01:07:54,800 [Gasps] 1459 01:08:07,500 --> 01:08:08,699 Aah! 1460 01:08:08,700 --> 01:08:11,200 - Ugh! - Cindy! 1461 01:08:13,500 --> 01:08:15,400 [Crowbar clanks] 1462 01:08:24,300 --> 01:08:27,100 [Chainsaw sputters, buzzes] 1463 01:08:46,800 --> 01:08:49,000 Time to go back down the well, bitch. 1464 01:08:49,001 --> 01:08:50,700 [Growling] 1465 01:08:50,701 --> 01:08:52,399 Cindy! 1466 01:08:52,400 --> 01:08:55,200 No. Don't hurt him! 1467 01:08:56,000 --> 01:08:57,499 Cindy, come outside. 1468 01:08:57,500 --> 01:08:59,100 - The aliens aren't invading. - Aah! 1469 01:08:59,101 --> 01:09:00,699 Aah! 1470 01:09:00,700 --> 01:09:02,400 Don't worry, Cody. I'll save you. 1471 01:09:02,401 --> 01:09:04,300 - Aah! - CINDY: Wait! 1472 01:09:04,301 --> 01:09:06,199 Wait. Don't do this. 1473 01:09:06,200 --> 01:09:08,400 You don't have to be evil. 1474 01:09:09,200 --> 01:09:12,800 I know what happened to you, Tabitha. 1475 01:09:13,900 --> 01:09:16,800 I know what your mom did. That was wrong. 1476 01:09:16,801 --> 01:09:18,399 You were just a little girl. 1477 01:09:18,400 --> 01:09:22,400 You're still that little girl, just a lot more corpsy 1478 01:09:22,401 --> 01:09:24,800 and with really bad teeth. 1479 01:09:24,900 --> 01:09:28,800 But maybe all you need is a mother. 1480 01:09:32,200 --> 01:09:34,000 And a father. 1481 01:09:46,000 --> 01:09:47,400 We could be... 1482 01:09:47,500 --> 01:09:49,500 A family. 1483 01:09:53,900 --> 01:09:55,599 Thank you all. 1484 01:09:55,600 --> 01:09:59,000 Your love has broken the curse and freed my soul. 1485 01:09:59,001 --> 01:10:00,700 I'll never have to kill again. 1486 01:10:00,701 --> 01:10:02,300 Really? 1487 01:10:02,400 --> 01:10:06,000 Nah! I'm just screwing with you! 1488 01:10:06,001 --> 01:10:07,999 [Grunts] Aah! 1489 01:10:08,000 --> 01:10:09,900 I just want to tell you both good luck. 1490 01:10:09,901 --> 01:10:11,800 - We're all counting on you. - [Splash] 1491 01:10:20,400 --> 01:10:21,700 Now it's over. 1492 01:10:21,701 --> 01:10:23,000 - [Gasps] - Aah! 1493 01:10:23,100 --> 01:10:24,700 Oh, no, no, it's okay. 1494 01:10:24,701 --> 01:10:26,199 He's our friend. 1495 01:10:26,200 --> 01:10:28,199 Thank you for saving our species. 1496 01:10:28,200 --> 01:10:30,000 Now we must return to our home planet. 1497 01:10:30,200 --> 01:10:31,400 Goodbye, then. 1498 01:10:31,401 --> 01:10:32,300 Ugh! 1499 01:10:32,400 --> 01:10:33,900 Goodbye. 1500 01:10:51,800 --> 01:10:54,199 Hey, congratulations, George! 1501 01:10:54,200 --> 01:10:56,000 You know the 'hood always got your back. 1502 01:10:56,200 --> 01:10:57,600 Yeah, yeah! 1503 01:10:57,700 --> 01:10:59,100 Come on! 1504 01:11:03,200 --> 01:11:04,550 Bye! 1505 01:11:04,551 --> 01:11:05,899 Whoo! 1506 01:11:05,900 --> 01:11:07,800 - Oh! - Oh! 1507 01:11:17,800 --> 01:11:19,500 ALL: Bye! 1508 01:11:19,600 --> 01:11:22,100 Oh, George, I'm so happy. 1509 01:11:22,101 --> 01:11:24,950 Finally we're a family. 1510 01:11:24,951 --> 01:11:27,800 Yeah. You, me, and... 1511 01:11:27,801 --> 01:11:28,600 - Damn! - Damn! 1512 01:11:28,700 --> 01:11:30,750 [Tires screeching] 1513 01:11:30,751 --> 01:11:32,800 Cindy, George, wait! 1514 01:11:35,400 --> 01:11:37,500 [Sighs] 1515 01:11:39,000 --> 01:11:40,200 Come on 1516 01:11:40,300 --> 01:11:41,399 "Scary Movie 3" 1517 01:11:41,400 --> 01:11:42,999 Welcome to the future, baby 1518 01:11:43,000 --> 01:11:45,500 You think you hot shit 'cause you got ice on your wrist 1519 01:11:45,501 --> 01:11:47,550 Now, y'all picture this... tough guy turned snitch 1520 01:11:47,551 --> 01:11:49,600 Knew he was lying by the way his eyes twitch 1521 01:11:49,800 --> 01:11:50,800 He gulp when he swallow 1522 01:11:50,900 --> 01:11:52,300 When he spoke, his voice pitch 1523 01:11:52,400 --> 01:11:54,000 My first thought's to slap him up, but I'm grown 1524 01:11:54,100 --> 01:11:55,600 So I dropped a jewel in his ear 1525 01:11:55,601 --> 01:11:57,099 Told him get on, leave it alone 1526 01:11:57,100 --> 01:11:59,400 Now he's asking questions he shoulda asked from the start 1527 01:11:59,500 --> 01:12:01,899 I'm gonna spit from the heart, spit till it's dark 1528 01:12:01,900 --> 01:12:04,000 From the stage in the park, I'm gonna bite if you bark 1529 01:12:04,001 --> 01:12:05,799 Just to show him that it's fun to me 1530 01:12:05,800 --> 01:12:07,900 And take a look at what being broke gonna mean 1531 01:12:07,901 --> 01:12:10,199 I am the truth, plus I'm hungry 1532 01:12:10,200 --> 01:12:12,500 Heads or tail, playboy, what's it gonna be? 1533 01:12:12,501 --> 01:12:14,750 You cannot escape your fate in the streets 1534 01:12:14,751 --> 01:12:16,975 Okay, I'll count cash, you count sheep 1535 01:12:16,976 --> 01:12:19,200 Better not sleep on the beats, capisce 1536 01:12:19,300 --> 01:12:21,199 Ain't no jokes in here 1537 01:12:21,200 --> 01:12:23,400 Ain't nothing but grown folk up in here 1538 01:12:23,401 --> 01:12:25,900 Don't come poking your nose in here 1539 01:12:25,901 --> 01:12:27,900 Listen to me, I ain't scared 1540 01:12:27,901 --> 01:12:29,899 Ain't no jokes in here 1541 01:12:29,900 --> 01:12:32,200 Ain't nothing but grown folks up in here 1542 01:12:32,300 --> 01:12:34,500 Don't come poking your nose in here 1543 01:12:34,501 --> 01:12:36,700 Listen to me, I ain't scared 1544 01:12:36,800 --> 01:12:38,299 Now, Dame Lee 1545 01:12:38,300 --> 01:12:40,300 This is slow motion like a Japanese warrior 1546 01:12:40,301 --> 01:12:41,599 I'm a shogun 1547 01:12:41,600 --> 01:12:43,500 If I got beef with more than one problem 1548 01:12:43,600 --> 01:12:45,099 You can't afford 'em, son 1549 01:12:45,100 --> 01:12:47,200 Used to mess with your chick out of boredom, son 1550 01:12:47,300 --> 01:12:49,199 Then I'd make her leave like she was autumn, son 1551 01:12:49,200 --> 01:12:51,200 I'm not talking to him, I'm talking to all of them 1552 01:12:51,201 --> 01:12:53,200 I don't discriminate, I'm who they women love 1553 01:12:53,201 --> 01:12:54,800 Yo, I'm who they kids look up to 1554 01:12:54,801 --> 01:12:56,299 Hi, my name is Dame Lee 1555 01:12:56,300 --> 01:12:58,400 I do it 'cause I can, do you blame me? 1556 01:12:58,401 --> 01:12:59,599 Watch how you feel about me 1557 01:12:59,600 --> 01:13:01,399 Everything that I spit is true 1558 01:13:01,400 --> 01:13:03,800 And my fam got the same blood running through them, too 1559 01:13:03,801 --> 01:13:05,800 You shook, son, look at how you looking 1560 01:13:05,801 --> 01:13:07,900 Wearing tampon singles 1561 01:13:07,901 --> 01:13:10,000 I'm a beast over beats 1562 01:13:10,100 --> 01:13:11,450 I count cash, you count sheep 1563 01:13:11,451 --> 01:13:12,800 Don't sleep on the beats 1564 01:13:12,801 --> 01:13:15,399 I'm a beast 1565 01:13:15,400 --> 01:13:16,999 Ain't no jokes in here 1566 01:13:17,000 --> 01:13:19,200 Ain't nothing but grown folk up in here 1567 01:13:19,201 --> 01:13:21,750 Don't come poking your nose in here 1568 01:13:21,751 --> 01:13:23,825 Listen to me, I ain't scared 1569 01:13:23,826 --> 01:13:25,899 Ain't no jokes in here 1570 01:13:25,900 --> 01:13:28,250 Ain't nothing but grown folk up in here 1571 01:13:28,251 --> 01:13:30,600 Don't come poking your nose in here 1572 01:13:30,601 --> 01:13:32,400 Listen to me... 1573 01:13:32,500 --> 01:13:34,699 You can live or you can die, die, die 1574 01:13:34,700 --> 01:13:37,400 You can bounce up like a "G" or break down and cry 1575 01:13:37,401 --> 01:13:39,999 You's a beotch, unh, yeah 1576 01:13:40,000 --> 01:13:42,500 And that's word from the ill crowd 1577 01:13:42,501 --> 01:13:45,050 Thug, look at what you got, please 1578 01:13:45,051 --> 01:13:47,600 Poppin' shots on your enemies 1579 01:13:51,000 --> 01:13:53,399 It ain't no slick talkin' your way out the battle 1580 01:13:53,400 --> 01:13:55,600 The tension's real thick, gettin' beefier than cattle 1581 01:13:55,700 --> 01:13:58,000 So you cowboys grab your heater and your saddle 1582 01:13:58,001 --> 01:14:00,199 Mount up, unh, yeah, get your jollies 1583 01:14:00,200 --> 01:14:02,300 Don't be too nervous, buddy, 'cause I'ma get to dissin' 1584 01:14:02,301 --> 01:14:03,400 While your homey's givin' up 1585 01:14:03,500 --> 01:14:05,099 Two fingers like Richard Nixon 1586 01:14:05,100 --> 01:14:07,300 I keep it real street 'cause I'm bred from the street 1587 01:14:07,301 --> 01:14:10,000 T- shirt upon my back, Chuck Taylors on my feet 1588 01:14:10,001 --> 01:14:12,699 Major bubblin' major fumblin', be troublin' 1589 01:14:12,700 --> 01:14:15,500 Broads is into major humpin', I'm livin' for somethin' 1590 01:14:15,501 --> 01:14:17,100 I envied nothin', I never be frontin' 1591 01:14:17,101 --> 01:14:19,499 Just check how a be coming 1592 01:14:19,500 --> 01:14:21,600 Bonecrusher, homey, you heard 1593 01:14:23,400 --> 01:14:25,599 Might be boozy but I ain't bankin' no curves 1594 01:14:25,600 --> 01:14:28,800 Off the dank and the drank, I be chasin' them skirts 1595 01:14:28,801 --> 01:14:31,200 Thug, look at what you got, please 1596 01:14:31,201 --> 01:14:33,600 Poppin' shots on your enemies 1597 01:14:38,200 --> 01:14:40,600 Thug, look at what you got, please 1598 01:14:40,601 --> 01:14:43,000 Poppin' shots on your enemies 1599 01:14:45,600 --> 01:14:47,100 Listen and observe me 1600 01:14:47,200 --> 01:14:48,799 Doo doo like tore sandals 1601 01:14:48,800 --> 01:14:51,100 I never reach, I got pull like door handles 1602 01:14:51,101 --> 01:14:53,400 Boy got flame, man, I burn like your candles 1603 01:14:53,401 --> 01:14:54,800 Are you in key on your life's piano? 1604 01:14:55,000 --> 01:14:56,399 Lifestyle is "Sopranos" 1605 01:14:56,400 --> 01:14:57,900 Here today but then you're gone tomorrow 1606 01:14:57,901 --> 01:14:59,199 Proceed to bubble... 1607 01:14:59,200 --> 01:15:00,700 The need is kind of dire, live wire 1608 01:15:00,701 --> 01:15:02,200 Like an electric box during a storm 1609 01:15:02,201 --> 01:15:03,499 Forced to live like this 1610 01:15:03,500 --> 01:15:04,799 Or that's how real it's gonna get 1611 01:15:04,800 --> 01:15:06,799 You can live or you can die, die, die 1612 01:15:06,800 --> 01:15:09,500 You can bounce up like a "G" or break down and cry 1613 01:15:09,501 --> 01:15:11,999 You's a beotch, unh, yeah 1614 01:15:12,000 --> 01:15:14,600 And that's word from the ill crowd 1615 01:15:14,601 --> 01:15:17,100 Thug, look at what you got, please 1616 01:15:17,101 --> 01:15:19,600 Poppin' shots on your enemies 1617 01:15:24,000 --> 01:15:26,600 Thug, look at what you got, please 1618 01:15:26,601 --> 01:15:29,200 Poppin' shots on your enemies 1619 01:15:32,200 --> 01:15:34,800 [Kebyar's "Smoke It Up" plays] 1620 01:15:34,900 --> 01:15:37,800 Just shake and break and roll it up 1621 01:15:38,800 --> 01:15:42,000 Just stay and blaze and smoke it up 1622 01:15:44,400 --> 01:15:49,200 And if you're not alone, then you better find the door 1623 01:15:49,201 --> 01:15:51,100 Now, while you hang around V.I.P. 1624 01:15:51,200 --> 01:15:53,200 Naw, we smokin' good, should be chillin' with me 1625 01:15:53,201 --> 01:15:55,199 You like the way the green tickle your nose 1626 01:15:55,200 --> 01:15:57,400 Making you want to slip out those clothes and get... 1627 01:15:57,401 --> 01:15:59,599 I hear you giggle but you know it's the truth 1628 01:15:59,600 --> 01:16:01,600 Why don't you bounce in my crib, we can roll on the roof 1629 01:16:01,601 --> 01:16:03,799 You can introduce Kebyar to your crew 1630 01:16:03,800 --> 01:16:08,200 We can get down and maybe they would like to come, too 1631 01:16:08,201 --> 01:16:11,200 Just shake and break and roll it up 1632 01:16:12,300 --> 01:16:15,600 Just stay and blaze and smoke it up 1633 01:16:16,400 --> 01:16:19,600 Just shake and break and roll it up 1634 01:16:20,700 --> 01:16:23,900 Just stay and blaze and smoke it up 1635 01:16:26,300 --> 01:16:31,400 And if you're not alone, then you better find the door 1636 01:16:33,000 --> 01:16:35,899 Time to bring it in on, all night I'm on the wrong... 1637 01:16:35,900 --> 01:16:39,600 My Caddy ridin' down the 285, lookin' live up in the ride 1638 01:16:39,601 --> 01:16:41,799 I love it, the way it makes me move now 1639 01:16:41,800 --> 01:16:43,900 Blow it out my nose on the way to the door 1640 01:16:43,901 --> 01:16:46,000 I want it, I need it to make me groove now 1641 01:16:46,001 --> 01:16:47,999 If I don't have it... 1642 01:16:48,000 --> 01:16:52,400 I love it, the way it makes me move now 1643 01:16:52,500 --> 01:16:54,399 Yo, yo, yo 1644 01:16:54,400 --> 01:16:57,150 Who you lookin' at? Tryin' to clock us? 1645 01:16:57,151 --> 01:16:59,775 I ain't feelin' that, you can't stop us 1646 01:16:59,776 --> 01:17:02,399 Who you lookin' at? Don't try to drop us 1647 01:17:02,400 --> 01:17:05,400 'Cause ain't nobody, can't nobody ever touch us 1648 01:17:05,401 --> 01:17:07,999 Yeah, notice... 1649 01:17:08,000 --> 01:17:09,350 Bullets spark through your parka 1650 01:17:09,351 --> 01:17:11,275 But it's really your fault 1651 01:17:11,276 --> 01:17:13,199 It was silly to talk 1652 01:17:13,200 --> 01:17:14,399 Feelin' ya grillin' me 1653 01:17:14,400 --> 01:17:17,200 Stop tryin' to get rid of me, the streets know this 1654 01:17:17,201 --> 01:17:18,999 See, death threats are never bogus 1655 01:17:19,000 --> 01:17:20,400 If you're dead wrong, we stand strong 1656 01:17:20,401 --> 01:17:22,399 Collective soldiers, warriors 1657 01:17:22,400 --> 01:17:24,400 By any means come out victorious 1658 01:17:24,600 --> 01:17:27,099 Don't be sayin' my name 1659 01:17:27,100 --> 01:17:29,750 Who you lookin' at? Tryin' to clock us? 1660 01:17:29,751 --> 01:17:32,400 I ain't feelin' that, you can't stop us 1661 01:17:32,500 --> 01:17:34,999 Who you lookin' at? Don't try to drop us 1662 01:17:35,000 --> 01:17:37,850 'Cause ain't nobody, can't nobody ever touch us 1663 01:17:37,851 --> 01:17:40,699 You don't want to get bitten by pedigree... 1664 01:17:40,700 --> 01:17:43,199 Venomous sting sideline him till his physique 1665 01:17:43,200 --> 01:17:45,900 Looks like a leak, distressed, took like a thief 1666 01:17:45,901 --> 01:17:48,599 He quit thuggin' cold turkey 1667 01:17:48,600 --> 01:17:51,300 Yo, who you lookin' at? Tryin' to clock us? 1668 01:17:51,301 --> 01:17:54,000 I ain't feelin' that, you can't stop us 1669 01:17:54,001 --> 01:17:56,699 Who you lookin' at? Don't try to drop us 1670 01:17:56,700 --> 01:17:59,500 'Cause ain't nobody, can't nobody ever touch us 1671 01:17:59,501 --> 01:18:03,100 Hey, yo, what you feelin' like? 1672 01:18:04,400 --> 01:18:06,400 I got ya 1673 01:18:10,800 --> 01:18:13,800 [Dame Lee's "Rock Rock Bounce Bounce" plays] 1674 01:18:19,900 --> 01:18:22,400 I'm one of the greatest natural phenomenons 1675 01:18:22,401 --> 01:18:23,999 Like Ramadan 1676 01:18:24,000 --> 01:18:26,600 I wish you could see what I've seen when the drama's on 1677 01:18:26,601 --> 01:18:27,600 And when the drama's on 1678 01:18:27,800 --> 01:18:29,600 Call flex, the bomb is on 1679 01:18:29,601 --> 01:18:31,099 Cocked and loaded 1680 01:18:31,100 --> 01:18:33,100 Safely holstered under my left arm 1681 01:18:33,101 --> 01:18:35,099 Cold shoulder, that's how I hold it 1682 01:18:35,100 --> 01:18:37,400 Now I play the drama bringer, degrader 1683 01:18:37,401 --> 01:18:39,499 Dame Lee 1684 01:18:39,500 --> 01:18:41,850 Rock, rock, rock, bounce, bounce, bounce 1685 01:18:41,851 --> 01:18:44,125 Rock, rock, rock, bounce, bounce, bounce 1686 01:18:44,126 --> 01:18:46,400 Rock, rock, rock, bounce, bounce, bounce 1687 01:18:46,401 --> 01:18:49,600 Dame Lee, Dame Lee 1688 01:19:27,400 --> 01:19:30,000 Rock, rock, rock, bounce, bounce, bounce 1689 01:19:30,001 --> 01:19:33,100 MAHALIK: Deejay, spin that shit! 1690 01:19:37,900 --> 01:19:40,800 - [Note plays] - GE ORGE: Bitch 1691 01:19:40,900 --> 01:19:43,100 - [Lower note plays] - Ho 1692 01:19:43,101 --> 01:19:45,200 [Notes playing] 1693 01:19:53,500 --> 01:19:55,799 GE ORGE: Now everybody in the 2- 0-2 1694 01:19:55,800 --> 01:19:58,400 Throw your hands in the air 'cause Fat Joe is through 1695 01:19:58,401 --> 01:20:01,900 Now everybody in the 2-0-2, throw 'em up 1696 01:20:01,901 --> 01:20:03,500 - Check it out. - Go! Go! Go! 1697 01:20:03,600 --> 01:20:05,999 I'm a white boy, but my neck is red 1698 01:20:06,000 --> 01:20:08,599 I put Miracle Whip on my Wonder Bread 1699 01:20:08,600 --> 01:20:11,600 My face is pale, nah, I've never been in jail 1700 01:20:11,700 --> 01:20:13,550 Me and Buffy spend every winter in Vail 1701 01:20:13,551 --> 01:20:15,400 How many bitches have I slapped? 1702 01:20:15,401 --> 01:20:16,799 Zero, unh 1703 01:20:16,800 --> 01:20:18,999 And Martha Stewart happens to be my hero 1704 01:20:19,000 --> 01:20:21,600 I grew up on a farm, and I was born with no rhythm 1705 01:20:21,601 --> 01:20:24,200 Dr. Phil's my uncle, and I like to hang with him 1706 01:20:24,201 --> 01:20:26,699 I can't dance, I wear khaki pants 1707 01:20:26,700 --> 01:20:29,250 My middle name's Lance, my grandma's from France 1708 01:20:29,251 --> 01:20:31,800 So maybe I'm wack 'cause my skin ain't black 1709 01:20:31,801 --> 01:20:33,099 But you can't talk smack 1710 01:20:33,100 --> 01:20:34,600 'Cause whitey just struck back 1711 01:20:34,601 --> 01:20:36,000 [25 fps by Ejder-Z] 119080

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