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1
00:00:04,405 --> 00:00:05,206
GOOD WORK, DAD.
2
00:00:05,239 --> 00:00:08,109
COME ON, HENRY.
LIGHTEN UP, ALL RIGHT?
3
00:00:08,142 --> 00:00:08,876
HOW CAN I?
4
00:00:08,909 --> 00:00:10,344
SANTA CLAUS ISN'T
COMING TONIGHT!
5
00:00:10,378 --> 00:00:12,746
SO WHAT?
WE'RE STILL GONNA HAVE
A GREAT CHRISTMAS.
6
00:00:12,780 --> 00:00:14,215
I MEAN, PRESENTS,
STOCKINGS,
7
00:00:14,248 --> 00:00:15,383
THE WHOLE 9 YARDS.
8
00:00:15,416 --> 00:00:16,784
PRESENTS? STOCKINGS?
9
00:00:16,817 --> 00:00:20,020
THAT'S WHAT SANTA DOES!
10
00:00:20,321 --> 00:00:23,157
HEY, HENRY!
OH, BETTER NOT POUT.
11
00:00:23,191 --> 00:00:25,659
OH, I'M WAY PAST POUTING.
12
00:00:26,860 --> 00:00:28,662
WHAT HAPPENED?
I WAS JUST
ON MY WAY DOWN
13
00:00:28,696 --> 00:00:30,298
TO SEE YOU
PLAY JOSEPH
AT THE MANGER.
14
00:00:30,331 --> 00:00:31,599
WELL, YOU MISSED
A HECK OF A SHOW.
15
00:00:31,632 --> 00:00:36,137
[O LITTLE TOWN
OF BETHLEHEM PLAYING]
16
00:00:36,170 --> 00:00:38,472
[BAA]
17
00:00:40,508 --> 00:00:41,575
OH, STOP IT!
18
00:00:41,609 --> 00:00:42,843
OW! OW!
19
00:00:42,876 --> 00:00:44,412
YOU WERE AMBUSHED
BY ELVES?
20
00:00:44,445 --> 00:00:47,215
YEAH, YEAH.
SANTA'S ELVES.
21
00:00:47,248 --> 00:00:50,284
THE FAT BASTARD
SICKED 'EM ON ME.
22
00:00:50,884 --> 00:00:51,852
BUT YOUR DAD IS SANTA.
23
00:00:51,885 --> 00:00:57,125
YEAH, AND HE'S A FAT BASTARD,
AND YOU KNOW WHAT?
24
00:00:57,158 --> 00:01:00,294
CHRISTMAS IS GONNA BE
SO MUCH BETTER THIS YEAR
WITHOUT HIM.
25
00:01:00,328 --> 00:01:01,762
HE'S NOT COMING?!
26
00:01:01,795 --> 00:01:03,497
UH-UH, NOPE.
AND YOU KNOW WHAT?
I'M FINE WITH IT.
27
00:01:03,531 --> 00:01:05,799
BECAUSE EVERY YEAR,
HE MANAGES TO STEAMROLL
28
00:01:05,833 --> 00:01:07,135
RIGHT OVER MY CHRISTMAS.
29
00:01:07,168 --> 00:01:08,102
OH, NO, NO, NO.
NO, WALT HAS TO COME,
30
00:01:08,136 --> 00:01:10,738
'CAUSE EVERY YEAR,
HENRY SNEAKS
OUT OF HIS BED
31
00:01:10,771 --> 00:01:12,706
TO GET
THAT LITTLE PEAK
AT SANTA CLAUS.
32
00:01:12,740 --> 00:01:14,375
HEY, LOOK,
HENRY'S GONNA HAVE
A GOOD CHRISTMAS.
33
00:01:14,408 --> 00:01:15,276
OK, TRUST ME.
34
00:01:15,309 --> 00:01:16,810
HEY, SWEETIE, YOU WANT
A CHRISTMAS COOKIE?
35
00:01:16,844 --> 00:01:19,313
I MADE YOU THIS SNOWMAN.
36
00:01:19,880 --> 00:01:22,483
THAT'S THE SPIRIT,
BUDDY.
37
00:01:27,888 --> 00:01:30,090
THERE IT GOES.
38
00:01:44,605 --> 00:01:45,806
HENRY'S STILL PRETTY UPSET.
39
00:01:45,839 --> 00:01:46,907
OH, HE'S GONNA
GET OVER IT.
40
00:01:46,940 --> 00:01:49,243
COULDN'T YOU JUST RUIN CHRISTMAS
THE OLD-FASHIONED WAY?
41
00:01:49,277 --> 00:01:52,613
JUST GET DRUNK AND
FALL DOWN THE FIREPLACE?
42
00:01:53,481 --> 00:01:55,483
NIGHT'S STILL YOUNG.
43
00:01:56,484 --> 00:01:57,618
Claudia:
AH, FINALLY.
44
00:01:57,651 --> 00:02:00,454
WHOA! HEY, MAN, YOU GOT
THAT TREE FOR FREE?
45
00:02:00,488 --> 00:02:01,255
DIDN'T I SAY I WOULD?
46
00:02:01,289 --> 00:02:02,856
YEAH, YOU SAID
YOU WOULD 2 WEEKS AGO.
47
00:02:02,890 --> 00:02:03,724
IT'S CHRISTMAS EVE.
48
00:02:03,757 --> 00:02:05,793
WELL, I GOT IT HERE
WITH A DAY TO SPARE.
49
00:02:05,826 --> 00:02:08,762
JUST GET IT IN THE STAND.
I'LL GO GET THE DECORATIONS.
50
00:02:08,796 --> 00:02:10,398
HEE HEE HEE!
YES! YES!
51
00:02:10,431 --> 00:02:12,700
DEAN LEFT THIS GIFT FOR ME
ON THE FRONT PORCH.
52
00:02:12,733 --> 00:02:14,468
HE IS SO SWEET!
LOOK!
53
00:02:14,502 --> 00:02:15,769
HE EVEN WRAPPED IT
HIMSELF.
54
00:02:15,803 --> 00:02:18,206
HOW SWEET IS THAT?!
55
00:02:18,606 --> 00:02:20,774
IT SAYS "LOVE."
56
00:02:21,809 --> 00:02:23,777
LOVE!
57
00:02:23,811 --> 00:02:25,746
WHAT ARE YOU PEOPLE
LOOKING AT?
58
00:02:25,779 --> 00:02:27,881
THIS IS PERSONAL.
59
00:02:29,550 --> 00:02:30,751
WHAT'S WITH THE GETUP?
60
00:02:30,784 --> 00:02:34,555
I WAS PLAYING JOSEPH
DOWN AT THE LIVING MANGER
AT THE CHURCH.
61
00:02:34,588 --> 00:02:36,690
WHY THE HELL
WOULD YOU DO THAT?
62
00:02:37,458 --> 00:02:38,526
FOR THE KIDS, MAN.
FOR THE KIDS.
63
00:02:38,559 --> 00:02:40,628
YOU KNOW, LAST YEAR,
I COULDN'T PRY 'EM
AWAY FROM IT.
64
00:02:40,661 --> 00:02:45,799
[O COME,
ALL YE FAITHFUL PLAYING]
65
00:02:51,472 --> 00:02:55,409
DAD, WE WEREN'T
LOOKING AT JOSEPH.
66
00:02:55,876 --> 00:02:57,678
OH, MAN.
67
00:02:57,711 --> 00:02:58,546
WOW.
68
00:02:58,579 --> 00:03:01,715
DOES THAT GOAT KNOW
THAT THAT'S A SHEEP?
69
00:03:01,749 --> 00:03:03,984
IT DOESN'T CARE.
70
00:03:04,017 --> 00:03:05,486
GROSS.
71
00:03:05,519 --> 00:03:07,288
OK, YOU KIDS READY
TO GO HOME?
72
00:03:07,321 --> 00:03:08,456
IN A MINUTE.
73
00:03:08,489 --> 00:03:10,691
WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT?
I WISH SOMEONE
WOULD'VE TOLD ME THAT
74
00:03:10,724 --> 00:03:11,892
WHEN I SIGNED UP
FOR THE GIG.
75
00:03:11,925 --> 00:03:15,796
SHEEP AND A GOAT--
THAT COULD BE DANGEROUS.
76
00:03:15,829 --> 00:03:17,765
THEY COULD SPAWN
A HYBRID CREATURE
77
00:03:17,798 --> 00:03:21,502
WITH STRENGTH OF A GOAT
AND THE CUNNING OF A SHEEP.
78
00:03:21,835 --> 00:03:23,471
HENRY! WE'RE GONNA
TRIM THE TREE!
79
00:03:23,504 --> 00:03:25,673
Henry:
TRIM IT YOURSELF!
80
00:03:26,374 --> 00:03:28,376
THAT ISN'T NICE.
81
00:03:28,409 --> 00:03:29,777
MOM, WHAT'S WITH HIM?
82
00:03:29,810 --> 00:03:30,844
OH, WELL,
THANKS TO YOUR DAD,
83
00:03:30,878 --> 00:03:31,812
SANTA'S NOT COMING
TONIGHT.
84
00:03:31,845 --> 00:03:33,747
DID YOU TICK
THE OLD MAN OFF?
85
00:03:33,781 --> 00:03:36,417
NO, NO, NO.
DAD TICKED ME OFF.
86
00:03:36,450 --> 00:03:37,785
HO HO HO!
87
00:03:37,818 --> 00:03:40,788
WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE
SANTA TO BRING YOU
THIS YEAR?
88
00:03:40,821 --> 00:03:43,591
AN ASTRO JAMMER
BATTLE BUGGY.
89
00:03:43,624 --> 00:03:47,027
WELL, SINCE YOU'VE BEEN
SUCH A GOOD BOY,
90
00:03:47,060 --> 00:03:51,365
SANTA'S GONNA PUT
THAT ON HIS SLEIGH
JUST FOR YOU.
91
00:03:51,399 --> 00:03:51,999
REALLY?!
92
00:03:52,032 --> 00:03:54,468
YES, OF COURSE.
HA HA HA!
93
00:03:54,502 --> 00:03:57,571
WE SPENT 3 MONTHS
TRYING TO TALK HIM
OUT OF THAT THING.
94
00:03:57,605 --> 00:04:01,575
* DEEP-TREAD TIRES
FOR ALL-WHEEL TRACTION *
95
00:04:01,609 --> 00:04:05,579
* RUBBER-TIPPED
MISSILES FOR SAFE
KILLING ACTION *
96
00:04:05,613 --> 00:04:06,314
TV: * REAL JAMMING
97
00:04:06,347 --> 00:04:10,418
* ASTRO JAMMER
BATTLE BUGGY *
98
00:04:10,451 --> 00:04:12,520
I WANT THAT!
99
00:04:12,553 --> 00:04:13,454
NO.
100
00:04:13,487 --> 00:04:15,356
BUT IT COMES
WITH EVERYTHING
YOU SEE HERE!
101
00:04:15,389 --> 00:04:19,560
IT'S TOO EXPENSIVE,
AND THERE'S NO USE
FOR IT.
102
00:04:19,593 --> 00:04:21,762
I CAN PICK UP
GROCERIES IN IT,
103
00:04:21,795 --> 00:04:22,863
AND SEE IN THAT PICTURE?
104
00:04:22,896 --> 00:04:24,665
THE CAT'S RUNNING
AWAY FROM IT.
105
00:04:24,698 --> 00:04:26,400
NO MORE WORRYING
ABOUT CATS.
106
00:04:26,434 --> 00:04:27,935
HONEY, THAT TOY IS
DESIGNED FOR PEOPLE
107
00:04:27,968 --> 00:04:29,870
WITH A LOT
OF OPEN LAND.
108
00:04:29,903 --> 00:04:32,340
NO, IT'S NOT!
IT'S ALL-TERRAIN!
109
00:04:32,373 --> 00:04:33,841
IT EVEN GOES UP CURBS!
110
00:04:33,874 --> 00:04:36,744
HENRY,
FIGHTING MACHINES
ARE GIRLS' TOYS.
111
00:04:36,777 --> 00:04:37,478
THEY ARE?
112
00:04:37,511 --> 00:04:40,781
YEAH...YEAH.
YOU SEE THAT MIRROR?
113
00:04:40,814 --> 00:04:42,783
THAT'S FOR CHECKING
YOUR MAKEUP.
114
00:04:42,816 --> 00:04:45,586
OH.
115
00:04:45,619 --> 00:04:46,687
ALL THAT WORK
FOR NOTHING.
116
00:04:46,720 --> 00:04:48,522
OH, NO, NO, NO.
IT WASN'T FOR NOTHING.
117
00:04:48,556 --> 00:04:50,758
BECAUSE WALT GETS
TO COME OFF GREAT, OK?
118
00:04:50,791 --> 00:04:52,092
HE GETS TO BE
THE BIG GENEROUS HERO,
119
00:04:52,125 --> 00:04:55,663
AND I'M JUST THE DAD
THAT DISAPPOINTS HIS KID
ON CHRISTMAS MORNING.
120
00:04:55,696 --> 00:04:58,098
YOU KNOW,
DO YOU REMEMBER WHAT
CHRISTMASES WERE LIKE
121
00:04:58,131 --> 00:04:59,767
WHEN WE WERE KIDS?
122
00:04:59,800 --> 00:05:01,635
DAD?
123
00:05:01,669 --> 00:05:03,904
CAN I GET
AN EVEL KNIEVEL
STUNT CYCLE
124
00:05:03,937 --> 00:05:05,339
FOR CHRISTMAS?
NO.
125
00:05:05,373 --> 00:05:07,808
BUT EVERY KID'S
GONNA HAVE ONE.
126
00:05:07,841 --> 00:05:10,478
NOT YOU.
127
00:05:10,944 --> 00:05:11,945
THEY ONLY COST $15.
128
00:05:11,979 --> 00:05:13,681
YOU'RE NOT GETTING
EVEL KNIEVEL.
129
00:05:13,714 --> 00:05:16,784
YOU'RE GETTING PANTS
AND A YO-YO,
130
00:05:16,817 --> 00:05:20,388
AND YOU'D BETTER ACT
SURPRISED.
131
00:05:20,421 --> 00:05:21,689
I REMEMBER THAT CHRISTMAS.
132
00:05:21,722 --> 00:05:23,791
I GOT A DICTIONARY
AND A VEST.
133
00:05:23,824 --> 00:05:26,093
YEAH, AT LEAST
YOU DIDN'T GET
BEANED WITH A YO-YO
134
00:05:26,126 --> 00:05:27,895
FOR NOT ACTING
SURPRISED.
135
00:05:27,928 --> 00:05:31,932
GOOD LORD, YOU GUYS
GREW UP IN A DICKENS NOVEL.
136
00:05:31,965 --> 00:05:32,900
IT WAS MORE LIKE BUKOWSKI.
137
00:05:32,933 --> 00:05:35,469
HEY, YOU KNOW,
I HAD EVERY REASON
TO BE UPSET.
138
00:05:35,503 --> 00:05:38,506
DOES YOUR DAD KNOW
HOW MUCH THOSE
BUGGY THINGS COST?
139
00:05:38,539 --> 00:05:39,507
I TOLD HIM.
140
00:05:39,540 --> 00:05:41,842
350 BUCKS!
THAT'S INSANE!
141
00:05:41,875 --> 00:05:42,643
YEAH, DAD.
YEAH, IT IS, OK?
142
00:05:42,676 --> 00:05:43,644
SO YOU GOTTA GET HIM
BACK ON YOUR LAP
143
00:05:43,677 --> 00:05:45,513
AND TELL HIM
HE'S NOT GETTING
THE BATTLE BUGGY.
144
00:05:45,546 --> 00:05:46,880
ALL RIGHT?
TELL HIM THAT YOU, UH,
145
00:05:46,914 --> 00:05:47,615
YOU RAN OUT OF 'EM.
146
00:05:47,648 --> 00:05:49,517
SANTA DOESN'T
RUN OUT OF THINGS.
147
00:05:49,550 --> 00:05:53,387
LOOK, WHATEVER.
TELL HIM THAT THE ELVES
WENT ON STRIKE.
148
00:05:53,421 --> 00:05:54,822
THE ELVES
AREN'T UNIONIZED.
149
00:05:54,855 --> 00:05:56,590
LOOK, IT'S YOUR PROBLEM,
ALL RIGHT?
150
00:05:56,624 --> 00:05:57,391
YOU TOLD HIM
HE'S GETTING IT,
151
00:05:57,425 --> 00:05:59,760
AND NOW YOU GOTTA
TELL HIM HE'S NOT.
152
00:05:59,793 --> 00:06:02,029
HO HO HO!
153
00:06:02,062 --> 00:06:03,464
I'M NOT GONNA DO IT.
154
00:06:03,497 --> 00:06:04,164
YOU HAVE TO.
155
00:06:04,197 --> 00:06:05,499
SANTA'S JOB ISN'T
TO TELL KIDS
156
00:06:05,533 --> 00:06:06,767
THEY CAN'T
HAVE THINGS.
157
00:06:06,800 --> 00:06:07,901
SANTA'S A YES-MAN.
158
00:06:07,935 --> 00:06:08,736
OH, GREAT,
NOW YOU'RE A YES-MAN.
159
00:06:08,769 --> 00:06:10,037
REMEMBER WHEN I WAS A KID
AND I WANTED
160
00:06:10,070 --> 00:06:11,705
THE EVEL KNIEVEL
STUNT CYCLE?
161
00:06:11,739 --> 00:06:13,106
WHAT ARE YOU
TALKING ABOUT?!
162
00:06:13,140 --> 00:06:16,176
OH, GOD! OF COURSE
HE DOESN'T REMEMBER!
163
00:06:16,209 --> 00:06:17,010
GET OUT OF HERE!
164
00:06:17,044 --> 00:06:18,812
HEY, I'M GOING.
ALL RIGHT, I'M GOING.
165
00:06:18,846 --> 00:06:20,914
I'M GOING.
166
00:06:21,749 --> 00:06:23,551
OH! OH, MAN,
I'M SORRY!
167
00:06:23,584 --> 00:06:25,686
I THOUGHT
YOU WERE CARDBOARD!
168
00:06:25,719 --> 00:06:27,888
OH...OH.
169
00:06:27,921 --> 00:06:30,458
YOU BROUGHT VIOLENCE
TO CHRISTMAS TOWN?
170
00:06:30,491 --> 00:06:32,926
IT WAS SANTA LAND,
171
00:06:32,960 --> 00:06:33,727
AND YES.
172
00:06:33,761 --> 00:06:36,864
[GIGGLING]
LOOK AT WHAT
DEAN GOT ME.
173
00:06:36,897 --> 00:06:39,467
OH, GREAT. THE BOYFRIEND
GOT YOU UNDERWEAR.
174
00:06:39,500 --> 00:06:41,469
IT'S INCREDIBLY
ROMANTIC,
175
00:06:41,502 --> 00:06:43,170
AND TO PROVE IT,
HE EVEN WROTE
"LOVE."
176
00:06:43,203 --> 00:06:44,972
SEE, "LOVE, DEAN."
177
00:06:45,005 --> 00:06:46,740
THAT DOESN'T LOOK
LIKE DEAN.
178
00:06:46,774 --> 00:06:48,976
NO, IT JUST GOT
A LITTLE SMUDGED
OUTSIDE.
179
00:06:49,009 --> 00:06:51,912
I DON'T THINK
THAT'S A "D."
180
00:06:51,945 --> 00:06:53,581
NO, IT'S AN "H."
181
00:06:53,614 --> 00:06:54,748
NO, IT'S NOT.
182
00:06:54,782 --> 00:06:55,549
LOOKS MORE LIKE A "B."
183
00:06:55,583 --> 00:06:58,619
NO, IT SAYS "D."
IT'S FROM DEAN, OK?
184
00:06:58,652 --> 00:07:03,591
IF IT WERE "B" IT--
OH, GOD.
185
00:07:03,624 --> 00:07:04,992
BRAD.
186
00:07:05,025 --> 00:07:06,927
OK, COULD
THAT SAY "BRAD"?
187
00:07:06,960 --> 00:07:08,762
I DON'T KNOW. IT MIGHT.
188
00:07:08,796 --> 00:07:10,163
OOH, IT WOULD
BE JUST LIKE
THAT DUMB BUTT
189
00:07:10,197 --> 00:07:15,068
TO GET ME SOMETHING
SO DORKY AND GROSS!
190
00:07:15,102 --> 00:07:17,705
OK, I'VE STUDIED IT.
191
00:07:17,738 --> 00:07:18,972
ALL RIGHT,
HERE'S WHAT YOU GOT.
192
00:07:19,006 --> 00:07:21,875
IT COULD EITHER BE
FROM BRAD OR DEAN.
193
00:07:21,909 --> 00:07:24,678
OR A GUY CALLED "BEAD."
194
00:07:24,712 --> 00:07:29,617
OR "DREN"
OR POSSIBLY "BLEG."
195
00:07:29,650 --> 00:07:33,053
GREAT. SO HOW
AM I SUPPOSED
TO FIND OUT?
196
00:07:33,086 --> 00:07:34,087
WHY DON'T YOU
JUST ASK HIM?
197
00:07:34,121 --> 00:07:36,023
WELL, IF I ASK DEAN
AND HE DIDN'T
GIVE IT TO ME,
198
00:07:36,056 --> 00:07:37,090
HE'S GONNA THINK
THAT I'M HINTING
199
00:07:37,124 --> 00:07:38,125
THAT HE SHOULD'VE,
AND I'M NOT.
200
00:07:38,158 --> 00:07:40,127
AND IF I ASK BRAD
AND HE DIDN'T
GIVE 'EM TO ME,
201
00:07:40,160 --> 00:07:41,629
HE'S GONNA THINK
I WISH HE HAD,
202
00:07:41,662 --> 00:07:44,932
AND I DON'T!
I HATE CHRISTMAS!
203
00:07:46,099 --> 00:07:49,503
ALL RIGHT, THE TREE'S READY.
THROW ALL YOUR CRAP ON IT.
204
00:07:49,537 --> 00:07:51,972
GOD,
IT'S ALMOST 8:00,
205
00:07:52,005 --> 00:07:54,107
AND WE HAVEN'T
EVEN DECORATED
THE TREE.
206
00:07:54,141 --> 00:07:56,744
QUALITY TAKES TIME.
207
00:07:56,777 --> 00:07:59,012
YEAH, THAT,
AND WE DIDN'T START LOOKING
208
00:07:59,046 --> 00:08:01,148
TILL AFTER 5:00.
209
00:08:06,286 --> 00:08:08,288
HOW MUCH LONGER
DO WE HAVE TO SIT HERE?
210
00:08:08,321 --> 00:08:11,291
NOT MUCH LONGER.
AT 5:00, THIS PLACE
CLOSES,
211
00:08:11,324 --> 00:08:15,062
AND THAT LAST TREE
GETS THROWN
IN THE DUMPSTER.
212
00:08:15,095 --> 00:08:17,130
IT'S MEANT FOR US.
213
00:08:19,099 --> 00:08:19,967
NO, YOU DON'T.
214
00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:21,869
NO, YOU DON'T!
215
00:08:21,902 --> 00:08:24,104
I'M SORRY, FOLKS.
TOO LATE.
WE'RE CLOSED.
216
00:08:24,137 --> 00:08:26,707
CAN WE JUST BUY
THAT LAST TREE?
217
00:08:26,740 --> 00:08:28,075
ON CHRISTMAS EVE?
218
00:08:28,108 --> 00:08:30,744
SORRY, FOLKS.
YOU CAN'T WAIT UNTIL NOW
219
00:08:30,778 --> 00:08:31,812
TO GET A TREE,
ALL RIGHT?
220
00:08:31,845 --> 00:08:34,582
THIS ONE'S BEEN PROMISED
TO THE LIEUTENANT GOVERNOR.
221
00:08:34,615 --> 00:08:35,515
IT HAS?
222
00:08:35,549 --> 00:08:37,050
THAT'S RIGHT. YOU'D
BETTER GET OUT OF HERE,
223
00:08:37,084 --> 00:08:39,052
'CAUSE IF HE SEES YOU
EYEBALLING HIS TREE--
224
00:08:39,086 --> 00:08:41,054
I'M JUST SAYING.
225
00:08:41,088 --> 00:08:41,789
WHAT'S GOING ON?
226
00:08:41,822 --> 00:08:44,224
IT'S OK, STEVE.
I GOT THIS ONE.
227
00:08:44,257 --> 00:08:45,993
MY NAME IS WARREN,
228
00:08:46,026 --> 00:08:47,260
AND WHO THE HELL
ARE YOU?
229
00:08:47,294 --> 00:08:50,998
WARREN, IT'S 5:00.
YOU'RE CLOSED.
230
00:08:51,031 --> 00:08:52,600
TAKE THE SIGN DOWN.
231
00:08:52,633 --> 00:08:54,768
I CLOSE AT 6:00.
232
00:08:54,802 --> 00:08:58,271
I WANT TO TALK
TO STEVE.
233
00:08:58,305 --> 00:08:59,840
WHY DIDN'T YOU
JUST BUY IT?
234
00:08:59,873 --> 00:09:01,575
I DON'T BUY TREES.
IT'S NOT RIGHT.
235
00:09:01,609 --> 00:09:02,676
IT'S PEOPLE TRYING
TO PROFIT
236
00:09:02,710 --> 00:09:04,878
FROM THE BIRTH
OF OUR LORD.
237
00:09:04,912 --> 00:09:06,079
Sean, whispering:
Hey, hey.
238
00:09:06,113 --> 00:09:07,147
Is Henry still in bed?
239
00:09:07,180 --> 00:09:08,115
Claudia: YEAH.
GREAT. WHOO!
240
00:09:08,148 --> 00:09:11,184
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
I GIVE YOU SANTA CLAUS!
241
00:09:11,218 --> 00:09:13,887
A KICK-ASS SANTA CLAUS.
242
00:09:13,921 --> 00:09:16,089
WHERE DID YOU
FIND THAT?
243
00:09:16,123 --> 00:09:16,957
IN THE ATTIC.
244
00:09:16,990 --> 00:09:20,594
[CHUCKLES] OH, YEAH,
WE DON'T NEED WALT.
245
00:09:20,628 --> 00:09:23,063
I SHOULD'VE DONE
THIS GIG YEARS AGO.
246
00:09:23,096 --> 00:09:24,231
THERE'S SPIDERS
IN THAT.
247
00:09:24,264 --> 00:09:27,167
AAH! GOD! YUCK!
248
00:09:27,200 --> 00:09:29,803
LOOK, SEAN,
I KNOW HAVE EVERY REASON
249
00:09:29,837 --> 00:09:30,938
TO WANT TO KILL
YOUR DAD.
250
00:09:30,971 --> 00:09:31,905
BUT THIS ISN'T
ABOUT YOU.
251
00:09:31,939 --> 00:09:34,742
THIS IS ABOUT HENRY.
IT'S ABOUT CHRISTMAS EVE.
252
00:09:34,775 --> 00:09:37,310
CAN'T YOU JUST CALL WALT
AND ASK HIM TO COME OVER?
253
00:09:37,344 --> 00:09:38,345
NO, I DON'T WANT HIM
TO COME OVER.
254
00:09:38,378 --> 00:09:40,280
AND EVEN IF I DID,
WHICH I DON'T,
255
00:09:40,313 --> 00:09:42,349
IT'S NOT
GONNA HAPPEN.
256
00:09:42,382 --> 00:09:43,751
WHY NOT?
257
00:09:43,784 --> 00:09:46,620
WELL, JOSEPH,
BACK AT THE MANGER,
258
00:09:46,654 --> 00:09:49,757
WELL, HE TOOK THINGS
TO THE NEXT LEVEL.
259
00:09:49,790 --> 00:09:51,959
WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT
THAT THESE HANDS,
260
00:09:51,992 --> 00:09:54,762
THE HANDS OF A LOWLY,
SIMPLE CARPENTER,
261
00:09:54,795 --> 00:09:59,933
WOULD ONE DAY CRADLE
A CHILD SUCH AS THIS?
262
00:09:59,967 --> 00:10:01,268
UH, DON'T WAVE, JESUS.
263
00:10:01,301 --> 00:10:03,136
HEY, I'M
THE BIG DRAW HERE.
264
00:10:03,170 --> 00:10:04,672
PLEASE,
JUST TAKE IT EASY, PAL.
265
00:10:04,705 --> 00:10:07,274
BEHOLD BY THE LIGHT
OF YON STAR
266
00:10:07,307 --> 00:10:09,910
THAT THESE 3 WISE MEN
HAVE COME
267
00:10:09,943 --> 00:10:12,846
TO LOOK AT THE SON
OF GOD.
268
00:10:12,880 --> 00:10:13,513
OW!
269
00:10:13,546 --> 00:10:15,215
THIS GOAT
IS EATING MY SOCK!
270
00:10:15,248 --> 00:10:17,084
Sean: COME FORWARD,
271
00:10:17,117 --> 00:10:19,119
REJOICE,
GATHER ROUND,
272
00:10:19,152 --> 00:10:22,756
FOR TODAY
OUR SAVIOR IS BORN!
273
00:10:26,827 --> 00:10:28,729
LOOK, I ADMIT
IT WASN'T THE GREATEST
MANGER SCENE EVER,
274
00:10:28,762 --> 00:10:31,799
BUT YOU KNOW,
WE WERE KIND OF GETTING
INTO THE SPIRIT,
275
00:10:31,832 --> 00:10:34,702
AND THE CROWD SEEMED
TO BE EATING IT UP.
276
00:10:35,468 --> 00:10:39,406
BEHOLD THE GIFTS
BESTOWED UPON THIS CHILD
277
00:10:39,439 --> 00:10:42,242
BY THIS TRIUMVIRATE
OF WISE MEN.
278
00:10:42,275 --> 00:10:46,714
BEHOLD!
CAN--CAN THE PEOPLE
IN THE BACK BEHOLD?
279
00:10:46,747 --> 00:10:48,448
CAN THE PEOPLE
IN THE FRONT
PLEASE MAKE ROOM
280
00:10:48,481 --> 00:10:51,985
FOR THOSE IN THE BACK
WHO HAVE DIFFICULTY BEHOLDING?
281
00:10:52,019 --> 00:10:53,120
Walt: HO HO HO!
282
00:10:53,153 --> 00:10:56,156
MERRY CHRISTMAS!
283
00:10:56,189 --> 00:10:57,124
Kids: SANTA! SANTA!
284
00:10:57,157 --> 00:11:00,260
IT'S SANTA!
LET'S GO! YAY!
285
00:11:00,293 --> 00:11:04,297
NO. NO, NO.
BEHOLD JESUS, NOT SANTA.
286
00:11:04,331 --> 00:11:05,432
HIM, NOT HIM!
287
00:11:05,465 --> 00:11:07,334
Walt: HO HO HO!
288
00:11:07,367 --> 00:11:10,771
COME BACK!
MERRY CHRISTMAS!
289
00:11:10,804 --> 00:11:12,305
[CROWD CHEERING]
290
00:11:12,339 --> 00:11:15,142
Walt: YOU'RE
GETTING PANTS
AND A YO-YO.
291
00:11:15,175 --> 00:11:16,376
PANTS AND A YO-YO!
292
00:11:16,409 --> 00:11:21,281
I'M NOT GONNA DO IT.
SANTA'S A YES-MAN.
293
00:11:21,314 --> 00:11:22,082
HO HO HO!
294
00:11:22,115 --> 00:11:24,785
PANTS AND A YO-YO.
PANTS AND A YO-YO.
295
00:11:24,818 --> 00:11:26,353
PANTS AND A YO-YO!
296
00:11:26,386 --> 00:11:28,956
HO HO HO!
PANTS AND A YO-YO.
297
00:11:28,989 --> 00:11:31,024
PANTS AND A YO-YO.
PANTS AND A YO-YO.
298
00:11:31,058 --> 00:11:33,126
PANTS AND A YO-YO.
PANTS AND A YO-YO.
299
00:11:33,160 --> 00:11:36,363
PANTS AND A YO-YO.
300
00:11:36,396 --> 00:11:40,367
[CROWD CHEERING]
301
00:11:51,144 --> 00:11:54,782
SANTA'S BEEN HIT!
SANTA'S BEEN HIT!
302
00:11:56,516 --> 00:11:59,186
IT WAS JOSEPH.
HE DID IT.
303
00:11:59,219 --> 00:12:00,153
GET HIM!
304
00:12:00,187 --> 00:12:01,755
Brad: I GOT YOUR BACK,
MR. FINNERTY. I GOT YA!
305
00:12:01,789 --> 00:12:04,057
WHAT YOU GOT?
WHAT YOU GOT?
306
00:12:10,964 --> 00:12:14,501
Sean: HEY! OW!
307
00:12:17,270 --> 00:12:18,038
[BEEP]
308
00:12:18,071 --> 00:12:19,372
DO YOU REALLY THINK
THE MICROWAVE'S
309
00:12:19,406 --> 00:12:20,073
GONNA KILL SPIDERS?
310
00:12:20,107 --> 00:12:23,176
THAT OR GIVE THEM
SUPERPOWERS.
311
00:12:23,476 --> 00:12:24,544
YOU SURE YOU DON'T WANT
TO JUST CALL WALT?
312
00:12:24,577 --> 00:12:27,514
NO WAY, BABY.
LOOK, I'VE KICKED BACK
ALL THESE YEARS
313
00:12:27,547 --> 00:12:29,116
WATCHING HIM HAVE FUN,
ALL RIGHT?
314
00:12:29,149 --> 00:12:30,450
IT'S MY TURN
TO BE SANTA.
315
00:12:30,483 --> 00:12:32,052
I'M GONNA CHANGE
THINGS UP,
316
00:12:32,085 --> 00:12:32,920
PUT A LITTLE FUNK ON IT.
317
00:12:32,953 --> 00:12:35,488
YOU'RE GONNA PUT
A LITTLE FUNK ON SANTA?
318
00:12:35,522 --> 00:12:38,225
YEAH! THERE'S
NO REASON SANTA
COULDN'T BE COOL,
319
00:12:38,258 --> 00:12:39,259
YOU KNOW,
APPEAL TO KIDS,
320
00:12:39,292 --> 00:12:42,796
HAVE A LITTLE
SOMETHING SPECIAL
FOR THE LADIES.
321
00:12:44,431 --> 00:12:45,365
MAC DADDY SANTA.
322
00:12:45,398 --> 00:12:47,234
THAT'S RIGHT.
THAT'S WHAT
I'M TALKING ABOUT.
323
00:12:47,267 --> 00:12:48,936
I JUST HOPE YOU KNOW
WHAT YOU'RE DOING.
324
00:12:48,969 --> 00:12:50,904
[CHUCKLES] I KNOW
WHAT I'M DOING.
325
00:12:50,938 --> 00:12:53,473
YOU JUST WATCH--
[SCREAMS]
326
00:12:53,506 --> 00:12:57,410
OW! HOT, HOT, OH!
327
00:12:57,444 --> 00:12:58,211
LILY?
328
00:12:58,245 --> 00:13:01,148
BRAD, I'M IN HERE.
329
00:13:01,181 --> 00:13:02,115
WOW!
330
00:13:02,149 --> 00:13:05,452
UH...DO YOU APPROVE?
331
00:13:05,485 --> 00:13:07,988
OF YOU NOT WEARING PANTS?
332
00:13:08,021 --> 00:13:09,923
YES!
333
00:13:09,957 --> 00:13:11,491
NO, OF THE BOXER SHORTS.
334
00:13:11,524 --> 00:13:13,260
I HOPE THEY WEREN'T
TOO EXPENSIVE?
335
00:13:13,293 --> 00:13:17,030
I WOULDN'T KNOW.
MY MOM ONLY BUYS ME
BRIEFS.
336
00:13:17,064 --> 00:13:20,133
SHE SAYS BOYS NEED
SUPPORT, YOU KNOW?
337
00:13:20,968 --> 00:13:24,271
BRAD, AM I WEARING
YOUR CHRISTMAS PRESENT?
338
00:13:24,304 --> 00:13:27,407
MAYBE. I DON'T KNOW.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
339
00:13:27,440 --> 00:13:30,243
HOW CAN I TELL
IF YOU'RE WEARING
MY PERFUME?
340
00:13:30,277 --> 00:13:32,112
YOU GOT ME PERFUME?
341
00:13:32,145 --> 00:13:33,513
YEAH.
YES!
342
00:13:33,546 --> 00:13:35,548
I KNEW YOU'D
LIKE IT. I DIDN'T--
343
00:13:35,582 --> 00:13:37,885
WHAT?
THE PERFUME?
344
00:13:37,918 --> 00:13:40,253
OH, YEAH.
THANK YOU.
345
00:13:40,287 --> 00:13:42,990
OK, YOU CAN GO NOW.
THANKS, YEAH.
346
00:13:43,023 --> 00:13:44,591
OH, DO YOU WANT--
THANKS FOR COMING!
347
00:13:44,624 --> 00:13:46,493
OH, GREAT.
I'LL STOP BY--
348
00:13:46,526 --> 00:13:47,460
YES!
349
00:13:47,494 --> 00:13:49,329
IT ACTUALLY LOOKS
KIND OF GOOD.
350
00:13:49,362 --> 00:13:51,131
YOUR CHEEKS
ARE ALL ROSY.
351
00:13:51,164 --> 00:13:52,065
OHH.
352
00:13:52,099 --> 00:13:54,434
HEY, MERRY CHRISTMAS,
MR. AND MRS. FINNERTY.
353
00:13:54,467 --> 00:13:55,602
OH, MERRY CHRISTMAS,
BRAD.
354
00:13:55,635 --> 00:13:56,836
HEY, SORRY I COULDN'T DO MORE
AT THE MANGER TONIGHT, MAN.
355
00:13:56,870 --> 00:14:01,975
I GOTTA TAKE OFF MY SHIRT
TO REALLY KICK SOME ASS,
YOU KNOW?
356
00:14:02,009 --> 00:14:03,076
NO PROBLEM.
357
00:14:03,110 --> 00:14:05,512
YOU KNOW, BRAD,
WE HAVE SOME EGGNOG
IN THE KITCHEN.
358
00:14:05,545 --> 00:14:08,381
OH, GREAT.
359
00:14:08,982 --> 00:14:10,884
THAT--
360
00:14:12,485 --> 00:14:14,254
CAN I HAVE SOME?
361
00:14:15,522 --> 00:14:16,489
YES.
362
00:14:16,523 --> 00:14:17,190
OH.
363
00:14:17,224 --> 00:14:18,358
I'LL GET YOU
A GLASS. COME ON.
364
00:14:18,391 --> 00:14:19,459
OH, YES!
365
00:14:19,492 --> 00:14:23,096
OK, I ADMIT IT,
THIS TREE IS BEAUTIFUL.
366
00:14:23,363 --> 00:14:25,565
WHERE DID YOU
FIND THIS?
367
00:14:25,598 --> 00:14:27,434
AROUND.
368
00:14:27,700 --> 00:14:31,438
YEAH, UNCLE EDDIE
JUST HAPPENED
TO SPOT IT.
369
00:14:31,471 --> 00:14:32,973
LET'S JUST GO HOME.
370
00:14:33,006 --> 00:14:35,208
WE'RE NEVER GONNA
FIND A TREE.
371
00:14:35,242 --> 00:14:39,546
FORTUNE FAVORS
THE BOLD, MY FRIEND.
372
00:14:49,156 --> 00:14:50,523
BINGO.
373
00:14:50,557 --> 00:14:53,093
IT'S A HOSPITAL.
374
00:14:53,126 --> 00:14:56,329
AND THIS IS
AN EMERGENCY.
375
00:15:06,539 --> 00:15:09,209
JIMMY, WHEN I SAY
WATCH MY BACK,
376
00:15:09,242 --> 00:15:10,510
I DON'T MEAN LOOK
AT MY BACK,
377
00:15:10,543 --> 00:15:11,578
I MEAN WATCH MY BACK.
378
00:15:11,611 --> 00:15:14,681
STEALING A CHRISTMAS TREE
FROM A HOSPITAL'S A CRIME.
379
00:15:14,714 --> 00:15:18,218
SO'S DUMPING TEA
IN THE BOSTON HARBOR.
380
00:15:18,251 --> 00:15:20,153
BUT SOMETIMES YOU
GOTTA TAKE A STAND.
381
00:15:20,187 --> 00:15:22,189
BUT WE'RE NOT TAKING
A STAND.
382
00:15:22,222 --> 00:15:24,224
WE'RE TAKING
A CHRISTMAS TREE.
383
00:15:24,257 --> 00:15:27,560
YEAH, WE'RE
STRIKING BACK
AT THE H.M.O.s.
384
00:15:31,231 --> 00:15:36,569
WHY ARE YOU TAKING
OUR CHRISTMAS TREE?
385
00:15:36,603 --> 00:15:38,171
THERE'S
A LIGHT BURNT,
386
00:15:38,205 --> 00:15:39,506
AND I'M TAKING IT
TO MY WORKSHOP,
387
00:15:39,539 --> 00:15:41,241
AND I'M GONNA
BRING IT THERE,
388
00:15:41,274 --> 00:15:43,076
I'M GONNA BRING IT
BACK HERE.
389
00:15:43,110 --> 00:15:45,445
OH, THANK YOU.
390
00:15:45,478 --> 00:15:47,647
YOU'RE WELCOME.
SO YOU SHOULD
GO BACK TO BED
391
00:15:47,680 --> 00:15:48,748
AND HAVE
A GOOD NIGHT.
392
00:15:48,781 --> 00:15:49,649
BUT THIS IS MY FLOOR.
393
00:15:49,682 --> 00:15:51,684
THAT'S ALL RIGHT.
HAVE A GOOD
CHRISTMAS.
394
00:15:51,718 --> 00:15:53,987
I DON'T WANT
TO GO UPSTAIRS!
395
00:15:54,021 --> 00:15:56,523
THIS IS MY FLOOR!
396
00:15:57,190 --> 00:15:58,391
YOU STOLE THEIR TREE?!
397
00:15:58,425 --> 00:15:59,492
HEY, I AM NOT A MONSTER.
398
00:15:59,526 --> 00:16:01,628
I LEFT THEM
A LITTLE SOMETHING.
399
00:16:02,429 --> 00:16:05,632
Eddie: OK, JIMMY,
PLUG HER IN.
400
00:16:11,038 --> 00:16:13,273
YOU ARE TAKING
THIS THING BACK
RIGHT NOW!
401
00:16:13,306 --> 00:16:14,207
I'LL TAKE IT BACK.
402
00:16:14,241 --> 00:16:15,575
BUT YOU KNOW,
I'D HATE TO SEE
HENRY'S FACE
403
00:16:15,608 --> 00:16:16,676
CHRISTMAS MORNING
WHEN HE WAKES UP
404
00:16:16,709 --> 00:16:18,278
AND HE FINDS
HIS TREE IS GONE.
405
00:16:18,311 --> 00:16:21,681
YOU'RE TAKING THIS THING
BACK TOMORROW.
406
00:16:21,714 --> 00:16:23,516
HO HO HO!
* YOU GOT A SANTA
407
00:16:23,550 --> 00:16:27,220
* YOU GOT
A BITCHIN' SANTA,
FANTASTIC SANTA *
408
00:16:27,254 --> 00:16:28,621
WHOO!
409
00:16:28,655 --> 00:16:30,223
OH, YOU SMELL
LIKE CAT PEE.
410
00:16:30,257 --> 00:16:31,791
[DOORBELL RINGS]
411
00:16:31,824 --> 00:16:34,627
WELL,
MERRY CHRISTMAS
TO YOU, TOO.
412
00:16:37,097 --> 00:16:37,864
HEY.
413
00:16:37,897 --> 00:16:40,667
HEY, LOOK AT YOU, HUH?
KRIS KRINGLE.
414
00:16:40,700 --> 00:16:41,801
YEAH.
NICE.
415
00:16:41,834 --> 00:16:44,437
SO, WHAT ARE YOU GETTING ME
FOR CHRISTMAS THERE, CHUBS?
416
00:16:44,471 --> 00:16:45,438
WELL, CALL ME
CHUBS AGAIN,
417
00:16:45,472 --> 00:16:47,807
AND I'LL SHOW YOU
WHAT I GOT YOU
FOR CHRISTMAS.
418
00:16:47,840 --> 00:16:48,808
LILY'S UPSTAIRS.
419
00:16:48,841 --> 00:16:50,543
HEY, THAT IS
A NICE-LOOKING TREE.
420
00:16:50,577 --> 00:16:52,679
THANK YOU. IT'S STOLEN.
421
00:16:52,712 --> 00:16:54,647
COOL.
422
00:16:55,682 --> 00:16:57,584
HEY, FINNERTY--WOW.
423
00:16:57,617 --> 00:16:58,385
DEAN, HEY.
424
00:16:58,418 --> 00:16:59,786
SO WHAT DO YOU THINK?
425
00:16:59,819 --> 00:17:02,055
UM, YOU DON'T HAVE
ANY PANTS ON.
426
00:17:02,089 --> 00:17:04,591
I WANTED TO SHOW YOU
YOUR CHRISTMAS PRESENT.
427
00:17:04,624 --> 00:17:07,627
NO, NO. SEE,
YOUR PARENTS ARE
RIGHT DOWNSTAIRS.
428
00:17:07,660 --> 00:17:10,697
SO WHAT?
ALL RIGHT.
429
00:17:11,864 --> 00:17:13,600
HEY, HEY,
HEY, HEY, HEY.
430
00:17:13,633 --> 00:17:16,269
WHAT ARE YOU
DOING HERE?
431
00:17:16,303 --> 00:17:17,537
WHAT AM
I DOING HERE?
432
00:17:17,570 --> 00:17:19,106
I'M KNOCKING BACK
SOME EGGNOG
433
00:17:19,139 --> 00:17:20,640
WITH THE LADY
IN HER UNDERWEAR.
434
00:17:20,673 --> 00:17:22,575
NO, HE'S NOT.
RELAX, OK?
435
00:17:22,609 --> 00:17:23,510
I MEAN, IT'S NOT
LIKE YOU'RE HERE
436
00:17:23,543 --> 00:17:25,412
WITH ANOTHER MAN
OR ANYTHING.
437
00:17:25,445 --> 00:17:26,246
ALL RIGHT!
438
00:17:26,279 --> 00:17:29,349
THE SHIRT'S
COMING OFF!
439
00:17:29,382 --> 00:17:30,217
LET'S GO!
440
00:17:30,250 --> 00:17:32,519
BRAD! BRAD, GO HOME!
441
00:17:32,552 --> 00:17:33,553
BRAD, GO HOME.
442
00:17:33,586 --> 00:17:34,654
ALL RIGHT,
ALL RIGHT.
443
00:17:34,687 --> 00:17:37,290
IT'S CHRISTMAS,
AND WE'LL SAVE THIS
FOR ANOTHER DAY.
444
00:17:37,324 --> 00:17:40,627
BUT IF YOU HAPPEN
TO SMELL SOMETHING
SWEET ON HER,
445
00:17:40,660 --> 00:17:42,095
IT'S THE PERFUME
I GAVE HER!
446
00:17:42,129 --> 00:17:45,064
THE SCENT
OF BRAD O'KEEFE.
447
00:17:45,732 --> 00:17:48,568
GO, GO. UHH.
448
00:17:49,402 --> 00:17:51,571
SO, UH, HE GOT
YOU PERFUME, HUH?
449
00:17:51,604 --> 00:17:54,241
YEAH, BUT WHO CARES?
I HATE PERFUME.
450
00:17:54,274 --> 00:17:56,576
PERFUME IS
FOR OLD LADIES
AND HOOKERS.
451
00:17:56,609 --> 00:17:58,678
I LIKE
WHAT YOU GOT ME.
452
00:17:58,711 --> 00:18:00,447
I, UM...
453
00:18:00,480 --> 00:18:01,748
I GOT YOU PERFUME.
454
00:18:01,781 --> 00:18:04,751
OH. I LIKE--
455
00:18:04,784 --> 00:18:06,753
I LIKE PERFUME,
THOUGH. I MEAN--
456
00:18:06,786 --> 00:18:12,159
I LIKE THIS PERFUME.
OH, YES, OK.
457
00:18:12,192 --> 00:18:12,892
[SNIFFS] OH!
458
00:18:12,925 --> 00:18:15,328
THIS IS THE PERFUME
I LIKE.
459
00:18:15,362 --> 00:18:18,165
MERRY CHRISTMAS,
FINNERTY.
460
00:18:18,198 --> 00:18:18,998
Henry: HEY!
461
00:18:19,031 --> 00:18:22,369
WHY ARE YOU WEARING
SANTA'S UNDERWEAR?
462
00:18:22,402 --> 00:18:24,671
WHAT?
463
00:18:24,704 --> 00:18:26,439
SANTA'S UNDERWEAR.
464
00:18:26,473 --> 00:18:28,308
I WRAPPED THEM MYSELF,
AND I LEFT THEM
465
00:18:28,341 --> 00:18:29,442
ON THE FRONT PORCH
FOR HIM,
466
00:18:29,476 --> 00:18:31,778
AND YOU'RE WEARING THEM!
467
00:18:32,412 --> 00:18:34,314
WHY IS EVERYBODY
IN THIS FAMILY
468
00:18:34,347 --> 00:18:36,416
TRYING TO DESTROY
MY CHRISTMAS?!
469
00:18:36,449 --> 00:18:42,222
Claudia: HENRY FINNERTY,
GET BACK IN THAT BED!
470
00:18:45,858 --> 00:18:47,694
Claudia: HENRY,
I THINK I HEARD HIM.
471
00:18:47,727 --> 00:18:50,263
ARE YOU SURE?
YEAH.
472
00:18:51,631 --> 00:18:55,268
IT'S HIM! HE DID COME!
473
00:18:55,302 --> 00:18:57,370
HO HO HO!
474
00:18:57,704 --> 00:18:59,639
CRAP.
475
00:18:59,672 --> 00:19:02,175
MOM, WHY DID SANTA
JUST USE A SWEAR WORD?
476
00:19:02,209 --> 00:19:05,212
LOOK, HE'S GOING
FOR THE MILK
AND COOKIES.
477
00:19:05,245 --> 00:19:09,682
MILK AND COOKIES.
HO HO HO!
478
00:19:09,716 --> 00:19:12,752
OH, YES, MILK.
479
00:19:14,254 --> 00:19:17,357
OH! SOUR MILK.
480
00:19:17,390 --> 00:19:18,258
OH!
481
00:19:18,291 --> 00:19:20,727
SANTA WONDERS WHEN HENRY
PUT THIS MILK OUT.
482
00:19:20,760 --> 00:19:23,630
YESTERDAY.
SO I WOULDN'T FORGET.
483
00:19:23,663 --> 00:19:27,800
WELL, I'LL JUST SAVE THIS
FOR MY THIRSTY REINDEER.
484
00:19:27,834 --> 00:19:30,203
OK, QUICK,
BACK TO BED, OK,
BEFORE HE SEES YOU.
485
00:19:30,237 --> 00:19:32,772
Walt: HO HO HO!
WHAT'S THAT?
486
00:19:32,805 --> 00:19:34,674
[SLEIGH BELLS]
Walt: HO HO HO!
487
00:19:34,707 --> 00:19:35,908
Claudia: BED! BED!
488
00:19:35,942 --> 00:19:37,710
IT'S SANTA!
ANOTHER ONE!
489
00:19:37,744 --> 00:19:39,312
NO! NO, IT'S NOT
ANOTHER SANTA
490
00:19:39,346 --> 00:19:42,449
HEADING
FOR THE FRONT DOOR,
WHICH IS UNLOCKED!
491
00:19:42,815 --> 00:19:43,883
OW!
492
00:19:43,916 --> 00:19:44,817
WHAT?
493
00:19:44,851 --> 00:19:49,689
UH...HO HO!
WHAT ARE YOU DOING
DOWN THERE?
494
00:19:49,722 --> 00:19:50,657
I'M SANTA,
495
00:19:50,690 --> 00:19:52,692
SO WHY DON'T YOU
JUST GET BACK
IN YOUR SLEIGH
496
00:19:52,725 --> 00:19:55,895
AND SHOVE OFF
ON YOUR MERRY WAY
THROUGH THE SNOW.
497
00:19:55,928 --> 00:19:56,729
HO HO HO!
498
00:19:56,763 --> 00:19:59,432
WELL, I THINK
THERE'S SOME CONFUSION.
499
00:19:59,466 --> 00:20:01,834
SEE, I'VE BEEN COMING
TO THIS HOUSE
500
00:20:01,868 --> 00:20:03,770
FOR YEARS AND YEARS,
501
00:20:03,803 --> 00:20:06,673
SPREADING JOY. HO HO!
502
00:20:06,706 --> 00:20:07,807
OH, HO HO HO!
503
00:20:07,840 --> 00:20:09,809
WELL,
I KNOW THE PEOPLE
IN THIS HOUSE
504
00:20:09,842 --> 00:20:11,778
WANT ME HERE
INSTEAD OF YOU!
505
00:20:11,811 --> 00:20:13,746
OK, IT'S REALLY TIME
FOR YOU TO GO TO BED NOW.
506
00:20:13,780 --> 00:20:15,782
NO WAY. I WANT TO SEE
HOW THIS PLAYS OUT.
507
00:20:15,815 --> 00:20:17,717
WHY DON'T
WE JUST GO OUTSIDE
IN THE STREET
508
00:20:17,750 --> 00:20:20,019
AND DISCUSS IT
SENSIBLY LIKE MEN
509
00:20:20,052 --> 00:20:21,688
NEXT TO MY SLEIGH?
510
00:20:21,721 --> 00:20:25,258
HO HO HO! GLADLY.
511
00:20:25,292 --> 00:20:28,428
HO HO HO!
512
00:20:28,761 --> 00:20:31,298
ALL RIGHT, DAD...
513
00:20:31,331 --> 00:20:32,832
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
514
00:20:32,865 --> 00:20:35,402
LOOK, AFTER WE TALKED,
I WENT TO 4 DIFFERENT
TOY STORES
515
00:20:35,435 --> 00:20:38,805
AND TRIED TO FIND
THAT EVEL KNIEVEL
STUNT CYCLE
516
00:20:38,838 --> 00:20:39,839
THAT YOU WANTED SO BAD.
517
00:20:39,872 --> 00:20:40,873
YEAH, I DON'T
WANT IT ANYMORE.
518
00:20:40,907 --> 00:20:42,542
I WANTED IT
WHEN I WAS 11.
519
00:20:42,575 --> 00:20:45,345
WELL, WHAT DO
YOU WANT, THEN?
520
00:20:45,378 --> 00:20:47,514
I WANT YOU
TO BUTT OUT, OK?
521
00:20:47,547 --> 00:20:48,848
I MEAN, I WANT
TO GIVE MY KIDS
522
00:20:48,881 --> 00:20:50,750
THE KIND OF CHRISTMAS
YOU NEVER GAVE ME,
523
00:20:50,783 --> 00:20:52,719
NOT LET YOU GIVE THEM
THE KIND OF CHRISTMAS
524
00:20:52,752 --> 00:20:54,020
YOU NEVER GAVE ME. OK?
525
00:20:54,053 --> 00:20:57,724
I MEAN, IS THAT
TOO MUCH TO ASK FOR?
526
00:20:57,757 --> 00:20:59,526
OK.
527
00:20:59,559 --> 00:21:03,763
BUT I DID FIND SOMETHING
AT THE TOY STORE.
528
00:21:10,903 --> 00:21:13,440
"TO HENRY,
MERRY CHRISTMAS.
529
00:21:13,473 --> 00:21:15,342
LOVE, MOM AND DAD."
530
00:21:15,375 --> 00:21:18,378
SANTA NEVER BREAKS
A PROMISE.
531
00:21:21,914 --> 00:21:25,818
OH...AND I GOT YOU
ONE MORE THING.
532
00:21:25,852 --> 00:21:27,854
WHAT'S THAT, DAD?
533
00:21:29,789 --> 00:21:31,824
MERRY CHRISTMAS.
534
00:21:32,759 --> 00:21:34,961
I LOVE YOU,
TOO, DAD.
535
00:21:49,376 --> 00:21:51,010
30-DEGREE
INCLINATION...
536
00:21:51,043 --> 00:21:53,680
18-DEGREE
ASCENSION...
537
00:21:53,713 --> 00:21:55,848
4 FEET RANGE...
538
00:21:55,882 --> 00:21:58,685
READY, FIRE!
539
00:21:58,718 --> 00:21:59,752
FIRE!
540
00:21:59,786 --> 00:22:01,354
WHAT?!
541
00:22:01,388 --> 00:22:02,822
RETREAT!
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!
542
00:22:02,855 --> 00:22:04,891
I'LL TEACH YOU
TO WAKE ME UP!
543
00:22:04,924 --> 00:22:07,927
RETREAT!
RETREAT!
37379
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