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(Транскрибовано за допомогою TurboScribe.ai. Оновити до Необмеженого, щоб прибрати це повідомлення.) Oh.
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Hello.
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Yuvala?
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Yuvala.
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Yuvala.
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Me, Gaylord.
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You, Yuvala.
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Woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo.
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Yeah, yeah, whatever.
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Me, Tarzan.
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You, Lady J.
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Another day, another banana.
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Oh, Cosmo.
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It's THE Dr. Cornholeus.
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Heavy duty.
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Oh, I'm such a fan.
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Oh.
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Come on.
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Let's give it to one.
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This is for the humans.
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Bring that
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stripper over here, right away.
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Not that one.
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White thighs.
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You can dance.
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No shit.
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And you can talk, too.
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You must be one of those humans from
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the tropics.
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Polly, want a cracker?
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Fuck no, I don't want a cracker.
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I want to get out of this madhouse.
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This is a madhouse!
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Whorehouse.
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Whorehouse.
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Are there more of you?
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No, no, no.
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You listen to me.
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I'm from planet Earth.
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I'm with the United States Air Force.
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You got my crew, two other astronauts, locked
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up in your clink.
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So, if you don't mind...
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Stay right where you are.
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Stay right here.
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Don't move.
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I have to make a phone call.
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Dr. Quirra!
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Dr. Quirra!
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Get General Lade and Sergeant Jerko on the
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phone right away and tell them and the
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whole gang to meet me down at Andrews.
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Oh, and Dr. Quirra, bring your tap shoes.
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We're going dancing.
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Apes, you must listen to me.
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For years we have thought that humans have
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no soul because they can't dance.
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But I have found three humans that can
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dance.
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And I have witnessed with my own eyes
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these three humans right here burst into spontaneous
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dance.
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The Foxtrot, the Funky Human, the Polka even.
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They have rhythm.
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I am telling you they can dance.
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They deserve the same inalienable rights that we
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have.
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And I can prove it to you.
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I can prove it.
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DJ, hit it.
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♪
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♪
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♪
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♪ ♪
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All right, stop the music!
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This is a bunch of cod swallow up.
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These humans can't rock.
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Dr. Conholious has trained these rammies to move
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their baby boots.
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I mean, after all, humans see humans do,
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right?
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What sort of proof do you need?
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They were dancing.
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Proof?
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I'll show you proof.
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00:06:59,180 --> 00:07:02,740
Let's see these humans dance to a real
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song and we'll show them the Vicky Vicky.
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Show them, Vance.
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Show them, Vance.
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♪
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♪
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Take a gander,
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primates.
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These humans can't dance a wurf.
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Because you can't sing for shit, you damn
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dirty ape.
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So, a trained parrot fed disease fantasies by
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Dr. Conholious.
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What a bunch of cack.
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You and your friends can't speak a wurf
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or think a wurf.
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Look, I'm a human.
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Of course I can think.
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I can speak.
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I got soul.
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Pushkin, come on.
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Back me up on this baby.
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Tell him like it is.
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Меня зовут Пушкин Дакушин.
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У меня собака, бабушка, столичная, Москва.
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Oh, you are pathetic.
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Fornication.
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Come on.
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Tell him.
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Tell him.
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You butchers!
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You bastards!
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You cut her brain out!
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I'll kill you!
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I'll kill every one of you!
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Get your filthy paws off me!
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Up with the bag of stunners.
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And I hope I never see them daggo
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faces again.
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Get your filthy paws off me!
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I'll kill you!
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And once and now and for all, Conholious.
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Conholious, I want you to stop banging on
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about about the rammy humans.
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Is that a human whazzing on my leg?
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Thought so.
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Well, I'm going to go home and have
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a wacky backy.
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Oh, you blew it, baby.
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Now he's mine.
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All mine.
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Don't touch me.
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You can't be animals.
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I'm tired of putting up with this shit.
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You'll rue the day that you messed with
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these arseholes.
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You stupid fucking monkey.
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Those fucking apes.
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We're never going to get out of here.
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Get off me, you mindless fuck.
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What are we going to do?
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It's starting to get cold in here.
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In Russia, we use our bodies to keep
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us warm.
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What the hell is going on now?
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Quiet, you, quiet.
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Listen, little human, we have to set you
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free.
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You're far too beautiful a specimen.
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I'm not so sure about this.
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Shut up!
157
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Shut up!
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Thanks, sweet Jesus, for that.
159
00:17:38,500 --> 00:17:41,280
Okay, um, where's my friends?
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The astronauts?
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I'm so sorry.
162
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We couldn't save them.
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They were sent to a beautician's school.
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Help me!
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Help me!
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Let's stay off my knickers.
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Let's go.
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Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
169
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We might need a little something for the
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road.
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Oh, God, stop those yabbos.
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All right, come on, move it, move it.
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Let's go.
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We've got to get out of here.
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Come on, go, go, go, go.
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Hold it right there, you human.
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Oh, yeah?
178
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Get out of my face.
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Come on.
180
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We've got to go.
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Move it.
182
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General, sir.
183
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Yeah, yeah, yeah.
184
00:19:06,740 --> 00:19:07,260
Sir, you okay?
185
00:19:07,540 --> 00:19:09,460
Yeah, I'm great, but I think I ripped
186
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my kicks.
187
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What the fuck are you talking about?
188
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Sir, sir, let me help you up.
189
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Oh, hold on, hold on.
190
00:19:22,760 --> 00:19:25,400
My allen whippers are riding up me bum.
191
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I'm home.
192
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I've been home all this time.
193
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Ah!
194
00:20:15,410 --> 00:20:16,410
Oh, no!
195
00:20:17,410 --> 00:20:18,050
No!
196
00:20:21,340 --> 00:20:23,880
You finally really did it!
197
00:20:24,300 --> 00:20:25,640
You blew it!
198
00:20:26,300 --> 00:20:28,020
You murderers!
199
00:20:28,680 --> 00:20:30,120
Damn you all!
200
00:20:30,600 --> 00:20:32,740
Damn you all to hell!
201
00:20:33,040 --> 00:20:35,420
Human, where can we find some help?
202
00:20:35,420 --> 00:20:37,300
Some H2O.
203
00:20:37,720 --> 00:20:38,460
That way.
204
00:20:38,600 --> 00:20:38,840
Order.
205
00:20:39,560 --> 00:20:41,900
Hey, honey, me spaceman, big strong, fall from
206
00:20:41,900 --> 00:20:42,320
sky.
207
00:20:43,400 --> 00:20:44,460
Yeah, me too.
208
00:20:44,820 --> 00:20:45,560
You speak English.
209
00:20:45,900 --> 00:20:47,100
Hey, honey, wait, don't go.
210
00:20:47,300 --> 00:20:48,740
We haven't had a handjob in about an
211
00:20:48,740 --> 00:20:48,960
eon.
212
00:20:49,100 --> 00:20:50,320
Please help a fellow astronaut.
213
00:20:52,160 --> 00:20:53,600
You blew it!
214
00:20:54,540 --> 00:20:57,460
Damn you, you murderers!
215
00:20:57,860 --> 00:20:59,900
Straight to hell!
216
00:21:31,740 --> 00:21:32,540
Again!
217
00:21:34,600 --> 00:21:37,040
Yummy, this hits the spot.
218
00:21:39,020 --> 00:21:39,440
What?
219
00:21:39,640 --> 00:21:40,240
What?
220
00:21:40,320 --> 00:21:40,760
What?
221
00:21:41,040 --> 00:21:41,840
What?
222
00:21:42,560 --> 00:21:45,060
There's a quaint little lemonade shop right up
223
00:21:45,060 --> 00:21:45,580
the way.
224
00:21:45,680 --> 00:21:46,340
Lemonade!
225
00:21:47,740 --> 00:21:49,380
Give me some ice.
226
00:21:54,480 --> 00:21:56,300
Oh, my God!
227
00:21:56,580 --> 00:21:57,080
Oh, my heart!
228
00:22:02,720 --> 00:22:05,580
You think perhaps I could have a lemon
229
00:22:05,580 --> 00:22:06,440
wedge, please?
230
00:22:10,120 --> 00:22:13,100
I would like a sample of sweet.
231
00:22:13,820 --> 00:22:14,480
Ah!
232
00:22:19,460 --> 00:22:21,760
Um, I'm just gonna have a lemonade.
233
00:22:22,180 --> 00:22:22,720
What do you want?
234
00:22:23,500 --> 00:22:24,660
Okay, she wants...
235
00:22:24,660 --> 00:22:25,600
I don't think I have that.
236
00:22:26,420 --> 00:22:31,120
She wants a nonfat half-calf mochaccino light
237
00:22:31,120 --> 00:22:31,500
foam.
238
00:22:32,020 --> 00:22:32,220
Oh!
239
00:22:32,680 --> 00:22:33,100
Cinnamon.
240
00:22:38,300 --> 00:22:38,900
Ah!
241
00:22:39,160 --> 00:22:40,360
These monkey pants!
242
00:22:41,400 --> 00:22:42,380
I love it!
243
00:22:47,840 --> 00:22:48,340
Oh!
244
00:22:48,340 --> 00:22:50,420
Can I get a lemon wedge, please?
245
00:22:51,020 --> 00:22:51,460
Hello?
246
00:22:52,700 --> 00:22:53,420
Oh, my!
247
00:22:54,600 --> 00:22:55,100
Ow!
248
00:23:12,280 --> 00:23:14,440
Get your hands off me, you crazy bitch!
249
00:23:15,020 --> 00:23:17,040
My, you're strong, aren't you?
250
00:23:17,380 --> 00:23:17,920
What the fuck?
251
00:23:17,960 --> 00:23:18,620
You can talk?
252
00:23:18,700 --> 00:23:19,940
Of course I can talk.
253
00:23:19,960 --> 00:23:21,080
I'm a barbarian princess.
254
00:23:21,080 --> 00:23:22,120
Oh, yeah?
255
00:23:22,260 --> 00:23:24,340
Well, I thought I was the only girl
256
00:23:24,340 --> 00:23:26,060
on this mud ball who could speak.
257
00:23:26,640 --> 00:23:28,120
No, I can too.
258
00:23:28,300 --> 00:23:28,680
Oh, yeah?
259
00:23:28,740 --> 00:23:30,420
Well, you think you're pretty fucking tough, don't
260
00:23:30,420 --> 00:23:30,600
you?
261
00:23:30,660 --> 00:23:31,220
Yeah, I do.
262
00:23:31,280 --> 00:23:32,920
Well, you must think you are so strong.
263
00:23:32,940 --> 00:23:33,200
Yeah?
264
00:23:33,900 --> 00:23:35,040
What, do you work out or something?
265
00:23:35,360 --> 00:23:36,120
Yeah, I do.
266
00:23:36,380 --> 00:23:37,080
What about you?
267
00:23:37,400 --> 00:23:37,800
Yeah?
268
00:23:38,760 --> 00:23:40,200
Well, you're also pretty cute.
269
00:23:41,860 --> 00:23:43,200
You're not so bad yourself.
270
00:23:44,240 --> 00:23:44,600
Oh.
15333
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