All language subtitles for Cold.War.Steve.Meets.The.Outside.World.2020.720p.WEBRip.x264.AAC-[YTS.MX]

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The United Kingdom
is totally fucked.

Uh, I say that with a heavy heart.

I think this country has--

in the short space of eight years,

from the Olympics, which we now look
back on as this incredible high,

and it was a high...

To get from there to where we are,
by degrees,

is desperately sad.

But it-- it's also--

It also means that, uh...

we need humour and satire
more than ever.

MAN: '..experimental medicine
at Imperial College, London,

'has said the UK needs to act fast
to stop coronavirus cases...

'..the rule of six coming in on
Monday, it's a restriction,

'the plan for Birmingham,
Solihull and Sandwell,

'banning people from different
households from socialising...

'..have to change parts
of the EU withdrawal agreement.

'He said the government
collectively has a responsibility,

'and they've got to resolve...

'..restriction in northern England
are going to include

'Liverpool, Warrington, Hartlepool
and Middlesbrough...

'..EU are set to go
before Parliament later.

'Boris Johnson is attempting
to push through

'the internal market...'

(BIRDSONG)

Cold War Steve began in,
I think it was March 2016.

Cold War Steve is Steve McFadden,
Phil Mitchell,

who was in a Cold War scene.

And the joke was just the
incongruous picture

of Steve McFadden in that scenario.

When it began, it was just...
"Does this look funny?"

There was no thought
about meaning or...

or context or anything like that.

And that's something
that's evolved over the time.

I didn't know anything
about Photoshop

or... or anything like that,
it was just done...

cut out Phil Mitchell,
put him in a photo.

I certainly didn't set out
to create artistic masterpieces

or anything like that.

I've had bad mental health issues
for my whole adult life,

but the beginning of 2016
was the lowest point,

you know, I was hospitalised,
and coming out of there...

I decided I needed to...

Because I'd see things on the news
or something,

and I'd be ranting and then just
get pissed, and, you know...

there was no outlook for anything,
so...

I decided to channel it
into something positive,

or something creative or
something that would be funny.

And... so it was just... this
kind of form of therapy, really,

in just making the pictures
and stuff like that.

If no one had liked it, I still
would have carried on,

because I enjoyed
making the pictures,

but it... it was brilliant that,
along with making me feel better,

erm, it also got really popular.

I was sent a Cold War Steve,
uh, collage, around 2016,

and just thought, "What is this?"

I had to make it bigger
on my phone,

and it was just the joy of
recognising people,

I thought, "Oh, that's someone...
that's someone I know,"

It's lots of faces
from the '70s and '80s,

so I thought, "Hang on, this seems
to be artwork geared to me."

It was quite early on, it was
at the height of Brexit fever,

and so that's, uh, a lot of...

uh... a lot of that
would involve buses

and, um... Michael Gove
and Boris Johnson... (CHUCKLING)

...and the...
the... the wrecking crew.

I first came across Cold War Steve
like I think a lot of people did.

I just stumbled across him
on Twitter,

and was captivated by these images,

and was struck by how quickly
the kind of people I knew

who were also on social media

were talking to each other
about him.

Very quickly,
there was this sense that...

this was someone special, it wasn't
just someone who'd come up with

a bit of a Twitter parody,
um, shtick.

They were really profound
and worthy of exploration.

Some are obviously more apparent
than others.

I don't like to be too obvious.

You know, I use the... the symbolism

or different recurring themes
that come back,

and just put them in.

But I never title them,
I just put the.. the picture up.

STEPHEN: I think the reason
that his works survive,

and continue to enthral
and beguile,

is because they don't tell you
what to think about them.

First of all, you look to see where
Steve McFadden...

(LAUGHING) ..is going to be
standing or sitting,

and what he's watching,
then you follow his eyeline,

then you look at the other people

and say,
"What are they looking at?

"And have you created what
you're looking at?"

If it's a rubbish tip,
"Did you make that rubbish tip?

"Or are you responding--"

You know, all this extraordinary
conversation goes on

through the eyes and the...
the placing of figures.

And yet...

two people could come to it

and see a totally different
conversation going on.

The whole point of Cold War Steve

is you have these brilliant
associations with people who...

Like, Harold Shipman,
I've noticed, has come up a lot.

Because Harold Shipman
killed lots of old people,

I thought, "Oh, OK,
what's that about?

"Aah, that might be about the
deaths happening in care homes."

And then I saw Harold Shipman
in the middle of,

it must be some kind
of Conservative office,

and there, just in the corner,
playing music,

is Harold Shipman and Fred West.

And you think,
"What's Fred West doing there?

"He was a child killer."

And actually, you're now thinking,
"Is he saying that actually,

"now kids are going back to school
during a pandemic,

"they're killing children again?"

And that is dark,

but somehow, hilarious.

And the fact that we can say that
in this country

is exactly what makes
this country brilliant.

It's what makes this country--

it's a free country
and we have freedom of speech.

I filled in a form recently,
it says "occupation"

and I put "artist",
and it just felt really weird.

Cos I-- I mean, I am, that's what
I do for a living, is... art,

but I don't think I'll ever...
feel, you know...

totally comfortable in saying it.

I don't know, it just--

The main thing I get...
mental health was,

that I struggle with, is, um...

imposter syndrome, I think.

And just sitting here now is...

When I'm talking, like,
every so often I think,

"What the fuck are they
filming me for?" (LAUGHS)

Cos I'm still, you know, a factory
worker or working on the roads,

and, you know, this is so new.

Cos I've been doing it as a job
for just over a year now,

when I gave up the day job.

So that... the pressure's there,
like, "What if it all ends?

"What if it stops? I'm fucked.

"I can't...
You know, I've got to..."

So there's that, but then there's
always this... this kind of...

you know, it can't be right,

I can't be having stuff in museums

and galleries
and exhibitions and stuff,

because, you know, I was cleaning
cones on the M42 in the snow,

like, you know, seven years ago.

For me, a clear comparison
that I draw

between Cold War Steve works
and art history

is with the Dada artists
who emerged after World War I.

And they invented photo collage,
and this montage,

and they were... they were
cut and pasting political leaders

surrounded by machine-guns
and, um, weapons of technology.

They were critiquing the world
they saw around them,

and for me,
that's what great art does.

It doesn't just reflect what's
happening in the world,

it challenges it,
and that's what

Cold War Steve's doing
with his work.

The social and political landscape
of now is turbulent.

Um... there is more information
that is...

uh, that-- that is
at my fingertips now

than has ever been before.

I can find out more about
what is wrong with now,

and I can tell more people
about it.

And they can tell more people
about it,

and they can tell
more people about it,

and then we can shout back,

and then we can take that
information and we can march,

and we can meet, and we can talk,
and we can, um...

we can fight back.

Every piece that I end up doing,

first of all I do on a sort
of cheap cut and paste app.

So, I'll find the background
that I think I want to use...

So, it's just a very basic
cut and paste...

So, I've got him,
and then it's placing him

where I think I will want him,
and getting the size, and...

Just like a sketchbook, I suppose,
of different ideas, and...

Some will take hours, and I'll--
I'll use layer after layer,

and some layers
I'll get rid of, and...

But then, some I can just sit down
and do very quickly,

and they're just as popular
as the ones that take hours.

They do remind me of...

Erm, it's so easy to sound
pretentious

when you start talking about
high art,

but, you know, Bruegel,

and, um, even Hieronymous Bosch,
and Hogarth,

and you think of big panels,

Marriage A-la-Mode
and Rake's Progress, and so on,

they do show... the sort of mud
and dirt of English life.

And that's something
that isn't often shown.

You know, there's
a pastoral English view

that Samuel Palmer
and other painters show you,

and Stanley Spencer shows you
something rather sweet as well.

But, uh... Cold War Steve
shows you--

shows you the sort of...

that we're all peasants,
we're all in the mud somehow.

Um, and I think that's a very
important part of what art can do.

It doesn't just ennoble, it also
brings us properly down to earth.

This is all you, this is your...
WOMAN: What?

...displays of pride.Makes me seem
very unsupportive, doesn't it?

MAN: But you're proud of him,
Katie.Yeah!

You are proud of him?
I am.

Yeah.
Yeah, really, genuinely.

What's your favourite piece?

Name one. (LAUGHTER)
That one. That one there,

cos that's from Birmingham,
so, yeah.

Probably that one.
Benny.Yeah.

Which is now going to be
in the Birmingham gallery.Yes.

That's nice.

That one.
Yeah.

What's your favourite Twitter one?

I'm not on Twitter.

Oh.
(LAUGHS)

That's probably-- that's probably
a good idea, isn't it?

Well, yeah. You don't want
to be too involved.

It might go to his head.
Yeah.

Katie's very, uh, grounding.
Yes.

In a good way. I like to have,
like, the-- the indifference.Yes.

(BOTH LAUGH)
Yeah!

No, I just leave him
to get on with it.Hm.

Cos there's-- there's other things
for me to be getting on with.

Three children, a horse for a dog.

The house, the job.

What do you think of this,

Cold War Steve Meets the Outside
World, then?

(CHUCKLES)
Yeah, it's good. It's very good.

It's nice to know that people
appreciate what he does.Mm.

And get it.
And get it, because I don't.

(LAUGHS)
Right.

So, Cold War Steve
Meets the Outside World,

because everything
that I've done is small-scale,

designed for people to look at
on a phone,

this is taking it
beyond the next level.

So we're going big, outdoors,

in a sort of situationist way.

And it's a tour of... a kind
of road trip around England,

starting at the Riverside Country
Park, I think it is, in the Medway,

which obviously, cos it's such a
monumental year news-wise for...

Um... obviously, the pandemic,
so it's...

it kind of made sense
to maybe get... a best of the year

in the, uh... in the location.

And then, after Medway,
I think we're... Bournemouth.

So it's...
a huge, two-sided windbreak.

One side positive, and the reverse
side will be very unflattering.

And then, Liverpool, um...

it's gonna be a giant jigsaw,

floating on Albert Dock.

The final piece will be sending
a postcard, a giant postcard,

from Birmingham,
from the Spaghetti Junction,

sending it to Coventry,
which is where we're heading now.

So we're coming up now,
I think, to the Coventry Basin,

where I'm gonna meet Carl.

He's kind of my main man,

my mentor, manager,

uh...

It's more than a manager
or agent type,

which I value him for,
he's, you know...

someone that I can...
sort of discuss things creatively...

So I'll do my...
my pictures and things like that,

but outside of releasing things
on Twitter,

it;s good to have, um... you know,
Carl there to...

to make suggestions and...

Oh, there he is! Yay!

Just talking about you, mate,
to camera.Oh, right.

Saying what a loathsome
arsehole you are.

(BOTH LAUGH)

Terrible pain in the arse.

This is a really nice location,
isn't it?

I think it's great.
And hopefully,

the weather will be like this
permanently, as well.(LAUGHS)

Well, that bridge is bloody low,

but apparently,
we've got it sorted, so...

the artwork
is gonna nicely tuck away...

Pass underneath these low bridges.
..and pass underneath it.

We shall see.

We'll get, maybe, Sam Allardyce,

to be on the barge.

Is Allardyce gonna feature
in the artwork, then?No.

But I think he could be good
as the driver.

Yeah?Steering it.
Yeah.You know?

(CHUCKLES)Why... why do you feel
the need to have C celebrities...

D celebrities...
Yeah...

..people on the periphery...
But they're always, um...

Like Sam Allardyce.
That was...

that was something
I used from the start,

as a-- a kind of blurring of
celebrity culture and... leaders.

It stops the piece
becoming too earnest.

We're filming it from Spaghetti
Junction in Birmingham...Yeah.

Yeah.
...to here.Yeah?

How long do you think
that would take?

Probably three days.
(LAUGHS)But you'd be really...

I thought we'd do it in a day.
I thought a day.

But you'd be really pushed...
Like, set off at ten,

we'll be pulling into
here at five.

Birmingham, from the 19th century,
through the 20th century,

up till today, has been
the home of so many radical

and disruptive artists.

Birmingham is the second city,
there's this outsider feel to it,

so artists feel, perhaps...

Well, maybe they feel like
they have more to prove,

or maybe they feel more like
there's nothing to lose.

But either way, it means the art
coming out of Birmingham

has always been more radical
than other places.

Birmingham definitely shapes your
outlook on... on the world

and on, uh, you know, political
matters and things like that.

And it's very influential
in what I do.

By and large, it's a bit shit,

but we, as Brummies,
we know it's a bit shit.

We don't try and pretend it isn't,

which is part of its charm.
(CHUCKLES)

If Cold War Steve's humour was,
strictly speaking,

just Brummie humour, he wouldn't
be so popular nationwide

and all... and around the world.

It may be Brummie humour,
but he's found a way of speaking

from a Brummie perspective
that people connect with.

It's pretty, uh...
Hardcore.

Fuckin' hell. So this is only
about four miles from your house.

Yeah. Mediaeval, isn't it?

Does anyone know which way
Coventry actually is?

It's this way, look. Minworth,
Tamworth, 40 miles. So...Ah.

Yeah, I mean, that... that is a...

It is a great spot.

Yeah.So you've got one...
You've got one that just...

Oh, right. Birmingham
and Fazeley Canal.Right.

This is where three canals meet.
(LAUGHS)

Great stuff for the launch pad.
The launch pad would be here.

There's something
about the bleakness

and the kind of overbearing
concrete structures

that are around us that...

I think they're quite powerful.

I mean, I'll probably think about
this later on tonight

and have a cold sweat.

But I think, in terms of locations,
it's perfect, isn't it?

We can maybe
get some dignitaries down here,

to wave us off.

WOMAN: 'The government's
drawing up plans

'to override parts of the
Brexit withdrawal deal.

'Critics say ministers are putting
EU protocol...'(MACHINE WHIRRING)

COLD WAR STEVE: We're meeting Adam,

the man who's gonna materialise
our massive project,

so it'll be interesting to see him,

because I haven't got a clue
how he's going to do... (LAUGHS)

..what we've got planned.

But apparently,
he's the man who can.

(LAUGHS)

Hello, mate.Hello!
Wahey!(ALL LAUGHING)

After you, mate.How you doing?
Pretty good.

(CHUCKLING)

Hey, man, you all right?
How are you?Very good.

Come in, into the office.
Yeah!Excellent.

Everything OK?
Yeah, excellent.

Nice to finally meet you off Zoom.

This is cool.
Quiet spot, as well.

Yeah, it's great, isn't it?
Cool.Great.

Yeah.That looks like
a giant windbreak.

It does, doesn't it?

Something we can cover off today,

is give you a sense of scale.
Mm.

How very big it's gonna feel.
Mm.Mm.

Yeah, its gonna be...
That's... each section is...

about ten metres?
Ten metres, yeah.Yeah.

Jeez.

Has it been a bit of an
engineering conundrum then,

as regards stresses from the actual
weight of the thing itself?Yeah.

But also, trying to factor
in weather conditions?

Everybody I've spoken to has...
told me not to do it.

(LAUGHS)Not to do it.
Yeah.

(ALL LAUGH)
Why?

Cos you're... I mean,
you're doing exactly what you...

what you shouldn't be doing
on the beach, putting up something

that catches the wind.A massive
sail, I suppose, isn't it?Yeah.

Have you got the design there?

This is obviously the horror side.

Yeah.
And it...

Yesterday, it did make me feel
quite ill.

Playing on a number of things,

so it's COVID, refugee crisis,
and Brexit.

But the other side,
which I haven't finished yet,

will be the complete opposite,
really.

Mm-hm.This is Bournemouth 2
and Bournemouth 1.

So this is currently what we're
thinking for the jigsaw.Oh. Yeah.

Yeah.
This is Trumpscape.

Mm-hm.
Which is already a jigsaw.

We just thought it would be
amazing absolutely massive.Mm.

Barge.
Barge.Yes.

We saw a very low bridge,
didn't we?Very low.That-- Yeah.

But you-- you're confident that...
they haven't just, like,

forgotten about that bridge
at the end?(LAUGHS)

Let's say that I am confident.
(LAUGHS) Yeah!

Let's act like that.
Yeah.

Um... So the latest design is,
when it's not up,

it's like this.
Yeah.

And then that can move...
(COUGHS)

..up like this.

Can I have a look in the studio?
Yeah.

We should go and have a look
at the samples.

Brilliant.
These are all the Medway prints.

Are these the final prints?
Yep.

Brilliant.
Put that down...Yes!

Super Saturday!
That is Super Saturday.

Lovely.

So, basically, we get these,

and make a framework
to the same size.

That looks amazing.
That does look good.

I mean, the idea is to have
the framework and everything

as kind of utilitarian and as
low-profile as possible.Yeah.

I think it's fantastic.

Not used to seeing them this size?
No.

(LAUGHS)Piss Stop, A1(M).
Piss Stop on the A1(M).

On the A1(M).North.

Do you reckon that was your biggest
ever engaged picture on Twitter?

It was, yeah.
Yeah, yeah.

That car is, um... Mussolini's.

Pissing on his own advice.

Yes!
Oof!

It's really sad, isn't it, actually?

SAMIRA: I think the single
most useful thing

in understand why Cold War Steve
and his art

is so perfect right now,
and will endure,

is because, in an age where

there's all this seething
rows on social media,

and everything's moving so fast,
and everything's amplified,

his artwork is somewhere peaceful
where you sit and you contemplate.

And it's that deep, slow
contemplation

which takes you out
of the daily kind of news cycle,

and... and lets you...

just pause.

All these things shall pass.

WOMAN: 'The Chief Medical Officer
has warned

'people have relaxed too much,

'causing a sharp rise in
coronavirus cases across the UK.

'Nearly 6,000 new positive tests

'were reported in London
two days...'

If you'd have told me a year ago

that something like this was
happening,

I'd imagine, you know,
months in preparation, and planning,

and various organisations to bring
things and make things,

and to think that it's going to be
up in, like, you know,

less than a couple of weeks...
(LAUGHS)

.with just, you know,
myself doing the artwork,

Carl doing the planning and stuff,
and then Adam making everything,

yeah, it's... it's good.

This is where the neighbours
start to ask questions.

Yeah!
(LAUGHS)

(GROANING)

Bend your knees!Gaaah!
Bend your fuckin' knees!

So that's a panel.

Fuck.

No fuckin' around with it,
is there? (BOTH LAUGH)

At the minute, we've got
the more positive imagery,

hopeful imagery,
in shadow on the reverse.

Mm.So I think we might need to...

think about flipping 'em round.

So this side is the hopeful,
positive imagery...Mm.

..and the inside
is naturally darker.

I need to get back
and get cracking.Yeah.

Cos time's a-running out.
I've done the hellish side,

and that was a conscious decision,
to get that side done first.

You know, it does drag you
into kind of a dark place.

I got up really early
Sunday morning,

and started delving into the...
the piece again,

erm... and I... you know...
immersing myself in it,

and then I thought,
"I've gotta go to ASDA

"to get some dinner for the kids,"
cos my wife was at work.

Went over to ASDA and... erm...

they'd moved...

Cos they're having a refit,
where the...

I went to buy pork, where the pork
was, there was fruit there,

and it just started throwing me,
and it was really busy,

and I... I kind of just, uh...

I had a massive, um...
sort of anxiety, panic attack,

and just hid
by the dog food section.

Uh... and...

was just, like, in floods of tears.

And... and
I rang my wife, who left work

and turned up at ASDA
in a care worker thing,

and kind of guided me out
without making a scene,

and paid for what we had.

You know, I think you have
to give a lot of yourself.

Years ago, at a very low ebb,
on holiday, I...

And it's really bad. I intentionally
walked out into the sea,

hoping that it would swallow me up.

Um... And I was walking out,

and then a piece of rope hit my leg.

And I went, "Eurggh!" and ran out.

And I always think back
to that strange bit of rope.

It's just it.. probably saved me.

You know, my wife as well,
I owe so much to her,

cos she's... she looks out.

She knows that I'm probably not...
the best, you know, mentally,

and she'll-- she'll look out for me.

(BIRDSONG)

COLD WAR STEVE: Yes,
I've got the essentials.

Deodorant, meds.

Bit apprehensive. I've not been away
for this long, have I, Katie?

Um...Katie's distraught.

Oh, Hugo, though.

Hugo? I'm gonna miss the big Hugo.

Right?

(GEESE CALLING)

This is very, uh, splendid,
isn't it?

It's nice.
Nice!

I've officially left the house.

Let's go and meet the world.

The outside world.
The outside world.

Bye, ASDA.

MAN: '..area of England
to be subject to a local lockdown.

'The new restrictions
coming in at midnight

'are due to a rise in coronavirus
cases across the region.

'It's thought around two million
people could be affected,

'in areas including County Durham,
Sunderland and Newcastle...'

From the bottom, there...

Well, that's another one done.

Departed Birmingham this morning,

in this fabulous motor home.

It's very much the, um, HQ

of this tour of England
that we're doing.

We're now entering my first stop,
Tilbury.

And why Tilbury?

Erm, it's near to where
the first exhibition is, in Medway.

Obviously, there's a lot of history,
historical docks.

Erm, it's where the Windrush,
Empire Windrush landed in 1948.

(SIGHS) This is the big leap
into the outside world.

Hello, outside world.

(HORN BLARING)

Wahey!
Ah, he did beep at me.

So, me meeting the outside world,
now I'm getting a bit apprehensive.

They beep and shout. (CHUCKLES)

I spend a lot of time, uh,
scrolling through photographs

of streets like this,
of buildings like that.

If I put "AB" into my search drive,
it comes up,

"abandoned shop,
abandoned theatre, aband--"

You know, it's all...
anything that's abandoned,

cos it just, you know, from an
artistic point of view,

they just look great, but they also
obviously convey

a perfect message of what
I'm trying to get across as well.

So seeing things like this is firing
up my imagination.

I think I would take affront
at an artist using the backdrops

and stuff I do, if they use a
backdrop that's dystopian,

just to, you know, make a picture
look funny or something, but...

I use them because I was putting
the people that I thought were...

were causing the most
deprived areas to suffer.

I was putting these,
the makers of that, into it,

so I was putting your Rees-Moggs,

and your Michael Goves,
Boris Johnsons.

This is of your doing,
this is of your making,

so I'd stick them in there.

A year ago, I'd have had a picture
with that Stallions sign,

and then I'd put... Photoshopped
that in front of it.

You know, that would have been,
uh, you know...

a Cold War Steve picture in itself.

And now it's... now it's reality.

(CHUCKLES)

Tilbury Docks.

Yeah.So this is, I understand,

the exact place where Windrush
docked in 1948.

Yeah.
Wow.

You see the old Pathe news footage
of the, erm...

people from Jamaica with,
like, the... the pork-pie hats

and the suits and stuff.

And obviously,
it's 70-odd years later,

where you've got people
that have lived in Britain,

were born in Britain,
spent their whole lives here,

and contributed so much
to this country,

suddenly find themselves
getting arrested

and... and... detained,
uh, and... and deported.

People came here to help us out and
work post-war, fill post-war jobs,

but they've done
much more than that,

you know, they've enriched
our whole society,

um... immeasurably.

Er... And so, really, when you look
and think this is where it...

it kind of started, that's...

The borders we have
are either fake,

set up by politician after wars,

or dictated by the sea.

Right? They're all fake. Right?

So I come to the terms with myself
that I'm an internationalist.

Once I do that, I'm not really
concerned too much

about one nation or another.

I cared about the people of Iraq

just the same as I cared
about the people of England,

or I cared about the people
of Azerbaijan,

just as much as I cared about
the people of Nigeria.

But that's not the way
people are tending to move.

People are tending
to go back into their shell.

(MOTOR STARTS)

ON RADIO: 'So it's
about three curves,

'so shall we get--
shall we give it a go?'

Roger, Rog.

CARL: One of the things that
we did wanna do

with the locations
of these four works was,

we wanted there to be, you know,
a city,

and, erm, something
in the countryside, and...

But, really, it was just
about making sure

that we were getting a spread
of places across the country.

Ideally, it would have been
across the UK.

But you have to remember,

when we first started talking
about this project,

it was deep in lockdown,
and so at that point,

when we started to think about
where we could go,

it was really, like,
"Where can we go?"

You know, "What can we
turn round at this time?"

I guess that's how
we found ourselves here.

They've announced lockdown
in the northeast.

It's not where we're going.

Uh... But I guess things are

starting to look a bit more
serious everywhere again.

Er, as it stands, none of the
locations that we're going to

are affected, but I think we're...

Oh, I don't know, I'm starting
to worry that perhaps, you know,

it's only a matter of time

8before there's a spanner thrown
in the works.(MACHINERY WHIRRING)

WOMAN: '..the emergency committee,

'including the leaders of Wales,
Scotland and Northern Ireland,

'before making his official
announcement later tonight.

'It comes after
his top medical advisors

'yesterday recommended raising
the alert level....

(PHONE RINGS)

Hello? Yeah, yeah.
You're on loudspeaker.

MAN: 'Uh, just to sort
of update you,

'there've been a few developments
this morning.

'Um... So, there is I believe,

'one Tory councillor who is very
upset about the artwork.

'Um, and is, I think, kicking up
a little bit of a stink.'

(LAUGHS)'Um, so... it's creating a
little bit of a...

'a furore, I think the word is.

'Um... And, as well, I've just been
wandering around on site,

'and we've had some interesting
mixed reactions.'

Mixed reactions?
'Um, ranging from lovely,

'slightly befuddled,
to one guy who was very irate.

'But, yeah, just so you know.

'So that's even before we've--'
Before we've even opened it,

there's tension and there's...
'Don't like to cause a...

..Tory councillors irate.

We need to get there and film,
quickly, and, uh...'Yeah.'

..open it and do one! (LAUGHS)

Thanks, Mark. See you in a bit.
'OK. Bye.'Bye, bye.

Having a backlash on Twitter,
you can mute or not read or...

You know, it's still quite, you
know... still hurts sometimes,

but you can just put it down.

But irate people...

on their patch...

(INHALES)

Latest on Cold War Steve on Twitter,

these are tweets what people have
put about my Medway thing.Right.

Already?
Already.

"Art? Art?

"Where's my spray can? Political
rubbish shouldn't be up there."

(LAUGHS)

Another one.

Oh, Megan's put, "I wonder,
would you feel the same if...

"if it was art that agreed
with your politics?

"Are we really going
to try and censor art?

"What next? Music?"

"No! Art, if it's being displayed
in a beautiful place

"like a country park where people
go to look at nature

"should be proper!"

Capital letters. "Art.

"Landscapes! Nice things!

"Not something that looks like
my grandchild did at school.

"I'm just fed up with people putting
this country down all the time."

Megan's just put,
"It's just pictures."

You know, this is certainly meeting
the outside world full-on, isn't it?

Yeah.

You know, I'm not going to some sort
of Cold War Steve Appreciation...

Society!Village hall somewhere.

Really are going fucking headlong
into it, aren't I?Yeah.

Yeah.

(SIGHS) We'll see.

STEPHEN: Words have begun
to fail us.

Erm, comedians and politicians
and intellectuals

no longer have the language
with which

to cajole and persuade people,

uh, into anything other than their
entrenched positions.

It's, you know...

So it seems to me that, uh, things
like paintings and, um...

and works of art like...
like the sort of, uh...

the mash-ups that... that
Cold War Steve, uh... gives us,

are probably the best way we have
of just inspecting ourselves.

I always talk about, um...

collagist John Heartfield,

who was doing his anti-Nazi stuff
in Nazi Germany,

and how, you know,
what he did, it was brave,

and what I do isn't brave.

Cos I'm sat behind a screen.

I'm not comparing me going to Medway
now as being brave,

or comparing it to John Heartfield,

but it's given me
a little taster of, uh...

of the dangers involved in, uh...

in being a satirist.

I think satires here, I mean,
in any normal situation...

the cut and thrust of politics
is kind of enjoyable.

But it's not if it's chaos.

It makes you feel frightened.

And that's why people end up
sort of huddling together

and not wanting to look at this
sort of stuff,

because it makes them feel
uncomfortable.

And its job is to make you feel
uncomfortable.

That's why particularly
Cold War Steve nails it,

because he can conjure
a sort of image,

a feeling of what it's like,

especially when we're told
it's all sunlit uplands

and, erm, world-beating
and everything,

and just with the careful choice
of the right sort of high street,

or, um, cafe interior,

he sort of makes you think, "Yeah,
that's what Britain's really like.

"Shit." (LAUGHS)

Just pulling into the...
country park.

Looking for placards, looking for...

burning crosses.

Bedsheets hastily painted
with some sort of slogan.

Feeling nervous?
Little bit.

(SIGHS)

MAN: '..restriction within part of
West Yorkshire and the Midlands,

'with a ban on socialising
with people

'outside of households and bubbles,
in private homes and gardens.

'Earlier on, the Health
Secretary...'(BIRDS CALLING)

CARL: I was, um,
just chatting to Jason.

COLD WAR STEVE: Mm.
And, uh...

I don't think he was wanting
to really...

get into it, particularly,

because obviously,
we're sort of fighting

a little bit of a... small fire,
here.(LAUGHS)

But he was, uh, telling me that
there might be some beef

with Bournemouth.
Oh, for fuck's sake.Yeah.

The new head of the council there
was voted in this week,

and everything has to go
through him.Oh, God.

I think he requested the artwork.
(LAUGHS)

Or, his office has requested
the artwork.

And have they seen the artwork?
I think they have, yeah.

They asked us if they could, uh...

put a hold on the promotional
activity for the time being.

(LAUGHS) Sounds ominous.

Does, doesn't it?
That's gonna be, uh...

censorship.

Yup.

(WIND GUSTING)

Murdoch's still standing.

Hasn't had anything thrown at it.

That's good.

Everywhere's kicking off, now.

Now they've realised what it is
that I do! (LAUGHS)

Oh, I hope we get
to put Bournemouth up.

Even if it's just for... (LAUGHS)
just for an hour.

Hooray! Super Saturday!

Looks good!
Looks great, mate.

Looks great, there, doesn't it?

Art? Art?

Why don't we put a Constable
Hay Wain there?

Yeah.
Wonder if anyone's clocked, uh...

Shipman discussing tactics
with, uh, Hancock.

Learning from the master!

You know, very strong opinions

and anxieties
that I channel into my art.

I mean, no one could have
a problem with this.

Apart from Farage.

Carl? Are they friendly?
Hello.

Yeah, yeah, they are, yeah.
We are. We don't bite.Yeah.

These... I'm sorry,
I've forgotten your names already.

No, that's all right.
I'm Imogen and this is Laura.

Hi.And we're... we work for Medway
2025 City of Culture bid.Oh!

Nice to meet you. Welcome.
Nice to meet you.

It's nice to get a friendly welcome.

There's some tension about
the artwork, apparently.

Um...Oh, really?Yeah?Really?

There's been some really
good stuff on Twitter.

Has there?People... Yeah.Yeah,
we've seen some good reactions.

So, like, especially, like,
on the Medway2025 hashtag, as well,

people are saying this is the best
thing to happen to Medway all year.

So...Great.Yeah.
There are friendly people.

Is this the grand revealing?
Well, yes.

Yeah.Yeah.In a low-key way.
Yeah.(LAUGHTER)

I hereby unveil the final piece
of the Medway exhibition.

(CHUCKLES) They've really
shrink-wrapped this one well.

But it's a good spot for, um,
contemplation, I think.

Uh, which...

This is definitely the
hardest-hitting one.

Um, there's no comedy in this one
whatsoever.

This is proper angry,
full-on protest art.

Um...

When you just think of the hatred
towards these fellow human beings,

and the complete lack of compassion
that there is at the moment...

So I hope people just stop and
contemplate it, really.

MAN: Don't know how well
it's gonna go down in these parts,

but, uh, hopefully, I mean, some
people might see, sort of,

things for what they really are,
uh, perhaps.

MAN 2: The art here asks
so many questions,

it's almost a time capsule of what
was happening at that time,

it's a commentary on
a lot of social issues,

which maybe, for some people,
are quite hard to take.

Just had word that,
uh, the council have met,

and it's all fine.

Bournemouth?No, here.Oh,here?

They've agreed that the artwork
should stay up.

They stand by their decision.

In their words, all publicity
is good publicity.

And the two that really caused
the issues

was Priti...

uh, that was the one
that's been flagged up

as being the most offensive,
inappropriate...

Upsetting, I think,
was a word that was used.

Um, but the other one,
A1 Piss Stop.

Really?Dominic Cummings
having a piss,

apparently, is more upsetting
and offensive than...

a mass grave.
A mass grave.Yeah.

They're more offended by lewd
behaviour...Oh!

..than they are by the idea...
By the meaning or comment.

Yeah.

They're realistic. Um...

I wonder if it's part photograph
and something else there.

There's a guy there in the water

and all these boats around him,

they're like ducklings,
you might have said.

Yes, it's something to do
with the COVID-19,

and perhaps Harold Shipman
and his, um, previous history

of... eliminating the elderly
and the frail.

Not my form of art,
put it that way. (LAUGHS)

I don't know if the artist
has funded this himself,

but if it's taxpayers' money
and council tax,

I'm a bit disappointed to think
that they haven't got better things

to spend their money on,
to be quite honest.

Very political, very interesting.

I think we agreed with its
sentiments, so yeah, it's great.

It's really fascinating. We haven't
got round to the others yet.

so we're gonna go and have a look.

What's your thoughts?
Yeah, the same, really,

I thought it was quite... shocking,
but it was good.

I was really pleasantly surprised

to find that we had Cold War Steve
coming to Medway.

All I can imagine is that the, uh...

the councillors and the
administration

had never heard of him,
cos I'm pretty certain

that he's skewering
quite a few of their heroes,

and I don't think they would take
too kindly to it

if they had realised just what they
were letting themselves in for.

So as we film, um...
this piece called The Wave is...

or, The Second Wave,
is unfortunately...

proving to be rather
prescient of me.

I think this is my favourite spot
of the whole exhibition walk.

Nice bench where you can sit and
quietly contemplate the artwork.

Generally, cos it's on a phone
and people...

it's very much scrolling
and pinching and zooming

and, um... you can't sit down
and properly contemplate it

as you can here with this.

It's the anti-white wall gallery,

because there's not
a white wall there,

there's, uh... the beautiful Medway,

with some beautiful industrial
action on the horizon, as well.

We see a lot of artists creating
glossy images

built for social media,
which then don't work offline.

The difference with Cold War Steve
is that his works,

they're great online, but when you
see them in the flesh,

they evoke quite an emotional
response in the viewers.

We've seen that in terms of how

people have been responding
on Twitter.

Erm, you can see then in Birmingham
Museum and Art Gallery,

hanging alongside Pre-Raphaelite
masterpieces, where they belong.

Hey, good, how are you? (LAUGHS)

Good, man.
Looks great.

Yeah.Everything looks great.
Yeah.Nice day for it.

Yeah.
How's your reactions been?

Positive.

Good.
Yeah. Mo-- Yeah.

Better than expected.

Certainly, whenever I do
bump into people,

speak to people,

I see no evidence of the hatred,
and the bitterness,

and the impatience,
and the resentment, and the anger,

all the negative
and horrible things

that are exhibited
on social media.

It's as if, um... rather than
social media being a mirror

or... or a representation,

it's a kind of... strange portal

into an anti-matter
version of society.

MAN: '..are against us.

'But now, going into the seasons
late autumn and winter,

'which benefit respiratory viruses,
I think it's very...'

September 23rd... 2020.

Meeting the outside world.

Here we find ourselves...

with a backdrop
of test and trace tents.

(MAN CHUCKLES)
Managed by Serco.

How they can get any contract...

There doesn't seem to be
any test and trace going on.

I think the guy under
the umbrella having a fag

is the embodiment of the
test and trace system. (LAUGHTER)

The whole test and trace area

basically consists of folorn-looking
men under umbrellas.

(LAUGHTER)

There's a train here.
I wonder if our man's on it.

It's Positive Carl.
(MAN LAUGHS)Hello.

Hello.

CARL: Today, we were supposed
to be loading in at whatever time,

seven am this morning.

The crew, the trucks,
all the plant hire,

everything was going down
last night.

And then, literally,
as they were about to set off,

got a phone call to say that
the new head of the council

had withdrawn permission.

So, at the very last minute,
we had to...

put everything on hold.

What's the latest?
What's the update?

Have you got any good news
from Bournemouth?

ADAM ON PHONE:

Has there been any talk about how
it's going to be covered over?

OK, mate. Well, you know,

I'm really hoping we don't have
to go down this route.

All right, Carl.
Cheers, mate.

Chris, take care.
Cheers, mate.

Bye.
Bye.

(SIGHS)

Fucking black paint.

This is from Councillor Howell.
Councillor Howell.

"I have decided to withdraw
permission

"for the Cold War Steve artwork
for the following reasons.

"The artwork portrays Bournemouth,
and, therefore, its citizens,

"in a negative light.

"We were given no indication
that it would...

"that it would reference
Bournemouth,

"not does Cold War Steve's
previous work available online.

"The artwork was
misrepresented to us.

"We knew it would have
a subversive element,

"but were told it would be playful

"and in line with Cold War Steve's
previous images.

"There is nothing playful
about the dystopian image.

"It is hard-hitting
political content.

"And the council should not promote
or be perceived promoting

"particular political viewpoints.

"The artist is free
to promote his work

"through multiple
commercial channels,

"so this is not an issue
of censorship.

"We do not feel..."
Yes it fucking is.

"We do not feel that Cold War Steve

"has shown enough respect
for the town's residents,

"who have done nothing to be
singled out for this treatment."

(LAUGHS) People on the dark side
have no connection to Bournemouth.

Is there anyone local to
Bournemouth on the dark side?No!

I mean, maybe...
No.No.

(TRUCK BLEEPING)

(GROANS)

It's still exciting.

Just to think that I'm responsible
for all these people digging

and putting massive concrete things
into the sand.

And... and this huge...

I will never do anything on a scale
like this again, I don't think.

But then, frustrating that...

people may not be able to see...

I mean, it'll be nice to see
the one side, anyway.

But it is one piece of artwork
that has two sides.

I've not come here just to do a
really positive piece

on... on Bournemouth.

So I suppose the elephant in the
room is the covering of one side.

Yeah.Well, we talked
about draping it.

But if you put a... a wool,
or even a cotton drape on it,

it gets wet,

and then it increases the load
on the structure.

Yeah, yeah.Right.So it needs
to be like a rubble bag.

Right.You know, it's slightly
thicker plastic.OK.

It's not bin bag material,
it's thicker.Right! (LAUGHS)

Brilliant. Really ugly.

Good. Good!
(LAUGHS)

There's been a bit of a delay
in getting the posts in.

It's the highest tide for 18 years.

That hole is about two metres deep.
Shit.

Or it was when we dug it.
That's not rain or anything?No.

It's water table.
And it's coming up.Shit.

So there's a double jeopardy
situation going on, almost,

in that Councillor Howell
wants to put a stop to it,

but nature may put a stop
to it anyway.

WOMAN: '..further 6,874 people have
tested positive for coronavirus

'across the UK in the latest
daily statistics.

'It's another record figure,
but officials say

'that is partly because
of an increase in testing.

'A woman...'

CARL: I'm looking for shells,

trying to chill out.

Yesterday, we weren't sure
it was gonna go up.

I think they're about
a day behind, so, erm...

it's sort of all systems go
to try and get it up today.

Now we've got the piece going up
with one side covered,

and it's starting another
interesting conversation,

I suppose.

Not necessarily a conversation
we wanted to have, at all, really.

But I guess that's the difference

between Chris banging these things
up on Twitter

and dealing with local councils,
arts festivals,

er, construction permissions,
engineers, all of the other stuff.

It's a bit... it's a bit of a jump,
to say the least.

Now I can see the posts
going in, and...

had time to reflect on everything,

to have one side, the main side
that's facing people walking past,

to have that covered,
I think adds to it,

a certain intrigue into it.
Yeah, yeah.

People are going to want to know
what that image is.

You know, it's just human nature
to be curious.

So I think it will perhaps end up
making the image...

seen by more people.

I've got a few days to get the
Coventry giant postcard done,

so I was working
on a few ideas last night,

but I need this
out of the way first,

cos it's just all-consuming,
isn't it?

(# GLOCKENSPIEL PLAYING)

The only censorship
I've dealt with before

is my own self-censorship.

Yeah.Um...
And that's... you know...

If I feel particularly strongly
about an issue,

and I-- I do a really angry piece,

I never sort of press "Send"
immediately.

I always walk away from it
and just let it, um...

let... you know,
consider it a bit more,

particularly if...

if I'm using... to make...
to bring the point home,

if I end up resorting to using,

you know, like, Hitler,
or Mussolini, erm...

you know, I don't use...
use them lightly.

OMID: I... I've never seen
anything that's made me think,

"Ooh, that's a bit too much."

Cold War Steve is probably
right on the edge

of what is acceptable or not,

because he always keeps it funny.

I think that's the line for me,
is it funny?

Cos sometimes, if you just
make a statement...

In comedy clubs,
if people just make a statement,

and they raise their fists, you
think, "Where's the art in that?"

The art is in the funny.

CARL: BBC News have run with,

"Cold War Steve... Bournemouth
beach artwork covered up.

"An artist said he was disappointed

"his work will not be shown
in its entirety

"after objections from the council.

"His latest work,
a 25-metre curved windbreak

"on Boscombe beach, Bournemouth,
is his biggest yet.

"But only one side of it
will be shown."

And then they've put both bits
clearly up on the site.

They've shown the whole--
Yeah.The site?

Both sides.

(LAUGHS)No stress.So the--
BBC, totally cool with it.

BBC have shown both sides.

"Cold War Steve said the censored
part deals with

"the dark underbelly of our
society."It said "censored"?

"The censored part", yeah.
It's in there.(LAUGHS)

Uh... "movements of intolerance,
hatred and division,

"issues that should never be
ignored, let alone covered up."

There you go. It's out.
That's good. It's good.

It's out, it's out there.

Let's retweet that one.

So, I suppose we're here to talk
about, obviously,

the art that's being erected
on Bournemouth beach.

Just wanted to get your views
on why you found it necessary

to censor the... the piece.

Yeah. This is... this is
a really difficult decision for me.

I had a sleepless night over it.

Um, particularly because
I do have a background in...

in photojournalism,
documentary photography.

But at the end of the day, we were
promised a piece that was playful,

uh, in line with
the artist's previous work,

and... and the dystopian side
of the image that was proposed,

and we saw very late
in the process,

is a very hard-hitting
political piece.

You know, it includes Nazi salutes.

It... I... I just felt
that it had gone over...

over the boundary of what would be
perceived to be acceptable

in, you know,
a public area like this.

It's gonna be covered, is it?
Have you heard about that?

Well, I just read that there.
It's absolutely ridiculous.

I think if it was poking fun
directly at the town, maybe...

you could have an argument
for trying to do

a bit of local censorship,
but even then,

there's nothing on there
that is outrageous.

(WOMAN LAUGHS) I think it's funny!
MAN: Yeah, it's funny.

I think we're big enough,
old enough

and wise enough
to make up our own minds.

WOMAN: Is that Harold Shipman?
MAN: Yeah, it is.

It is! (LAUGHS)

Oh, my goodness. It's
a bit controversial, isn't it?

MAN: ..him driving...
Carrying Putin? (LAUGHS)

I'm glad I got to see it, then,
before it gets covered up. (LAUGHS)

The job of art is to provoke,
is to...

uh... is to unsettle,
it's to entertain,

it's all these things at once.

So it's... it's very important
to have that.

Thank you, that's brilliant.
(LAUGHS)

CARL: Chris is the artist.
Oh, you're Cold War Steve?

Cold War Steve, yeah.
It's incredible.Oh, thank you.

Thank you.
Like, it's amaz--

I've just seen it on Twitter and I
was like, "I've gotta dash down."

The fact that you've got
all of the...

You know, the brilliance
and beauty of Bournemouth,

you've got the Cherries, football
fans in there.That's it, yeah.

You've got... Buster Merryfield's
a big part of this town.

Yes! (LAUGHS)

And then you've got
the rise of fascism.

Why would you cover it up? Because,
what, it's making people talk?

To me, people need to talk.
This is a time to talk.

Absolutely.About every single
thing that's going on in the world.

I'm relieved that
I've got to see it up.

I thought earlier today "I just want
to see it for five minutes.

"Let me see it up. Let me see it
in all its glory." Which I've done.

But then if I arrive here tomorrow
morning, it's covered up, I...

Yeah, that's... I don't know.
It's gonna be very sad.

Very sad.

It's the morning after
the day of the reveal.

First chance to look at it
and take stock, really.

After a few, uh... fraught days,

here we are on a peaceful morning,
here in Bournemouth,

looking at the positive side
radiating in the sunshine.

It looks great, but, um...
obviously the... the other side,

which is literally in shadows,

is getting covered up as we speak,

so that's the one
disappointing thing, but...

But it is brilliant to see it up.

All the attention has been
on the forbidden side.

But this side is
the positive vision of Britain,

which is what I always enjoy doing,
ones like this.

And as always with these pieces,
I do a lot of research,

um... of the local area.

So there's a businesswoman
that gives out curries to homeless,

there's, um, nurses,
and Bournemouth FC mascots,

uh, Bournemouth Pride flag,

all mixed in with a big welcome mat.

Which obviously, I think it's pretty
obvious why I've put that there.

And there's also a lot of people

that came to this country
as a refugee

that have obviously gone on to
benefit our country immeasurably.

And then the black and white
characters there

are from the Kindertransport,

when Britain welcomed thousands of
Jewish children from Nazi Germany.

Um, you know, that's the Britain
that I wanted to represent here.

Um, but it needs that other side
to... to really spell out...

um, the message that
I'm trying to put across.

WOMAN: Look, it's even
got what's his name up there,

from, um, Only Fools and Horses.

Uncle.
(MAN LAUGHS)

WOMAN 2: That's life.
WOMAN 3: Mmm.

Definitely good representation
of English life, you know.

Even down to the old Caribbean
jerk chicken in there.There's Mo.

(LAUGHS)
Mo Farah.

Yeah. Oh, well. Carnival.
It's good representation.

WOMAN: We ideally would have
presented the work

as it was intended to be seen
by the artist,

so we would have shown both sides,

but as a local authority run
and part-funded festival,

we have to find that really
difficult balance

between what we would ideally
want to programme

and the views
of the elected members

who represent the people
who live here.

So it's a... you know, it's
a balance that we have to find.

We're really pleased that we can
show both sides of the piece

on our website, so people
can make up their own mind.

Um... But it's certainly great
that we can host it here

as part of the festival,

and that it is creating debate,

and, you know,
it's getting people talking.

If you put an art installation up
and black it out,

what does that say
about the council?

Why are you doing this?
This is an arts festival.

It's about,
don't have censorship.

Your opinion is your opinion.

I've been in... uh, working
with culture for 30 years,

and I can't recall an occasion

where an artwork has been censored

or covered in this way.

And I think it's
an extraordinary reflection

of the times that we're in.

that we... we've lost our tolerance

to the... to the extent where...

politicians will cover an artwork.

As we've been going around
trying to get... the work on...

there have been these reactions
pretty much in every location.

Online, some people have said,
"Well, if it's a complete artwork,

"you shouldn't have
put it up at all."

But at least now, it's been up,

it's been... shown,
albeit for a short time,

but... I think it's got
more people talking,

so I think it was the right decision
just to go ahead with it.

MAN: '..reports of legal action
against the government

'over its plans to tear up part of
the Brexit withdrawal agreement

'signed last year.'

WOMAN: 'This draft bill is,
by its very nature,

'a breach of...'

MAN: Will you have it finished
by the end of the day?

Uh... yeah.

Do you ever get bored doing this?

No.

It's really therapeutic, I think.

What would you do
if you weren't doing this, then?

Boozing.

That's, like, my only hobby.

Do you like boozing on your own?

Yep.
Any bar would do?

No, always in the house. Cheaper.

I mean, it was just, erm...
self-medicating, isn't it? You know.

Self-medicating from what, though?

Depression, mainly.

Do... do you kind of...
understand why you were depressed?

I guessed it was clinical
depression, really.

There was no...

there was no trigger
or anything like that.

Every suicide ideation
or thoughts of self-harm

were fuelled by alcohol.

Mm.You know?

Do you still have suicide ideation?

No. I...

I don't, actually.
Cos I used to...

sort of fantasise
about getting blown up

on the bus on the way to work.

You just end up thinking that...
you know, "Is this it?"Mm.

Just shit jobs, no money.

And then I tried...
went in the... shed,

and... strung myself up with a belt.

Mm.

Erm... That didn't work, thankfully.

Walked into the sea...
There was a few... times.Mm.

I look back and I just...

It's... it's odd.

Cos people always say, "Oh, that's
selfish. You've got kids. Or..."

Mm.But at that moment,
you don't think straight, do you?

No.You're not thinking right,
you just wanna just stop...

Mm.
Stop everything.

I always say
Cold War Steve saved me.Mm.

I mean, seeing these fuckers,

I would have to drink to fucking...
block them out.Yeah.

I couldn't... I can't cope with it.

This morning, we're having
a day trip to Barnard Castle.

A pilgrimage to the site
of one of the biggest examples

of contempt for the British public
ever displayed.

So, I was having some messages
with Les Dennis last night,

so we've arranged to meet him this
afternoon at three o'clock.

Look, that is... that's the scene!

Ladies and gentlemen,
you've arrived at Barnard Castle.

I can understand
why Dominic Cummings

felt the need to test his eyes here.

Very picturesque.

(BIRDSONG)

Don't think I've been
to an actual location

of one of my pictures before.

I need to get the date.
So, there's a Cummings Day,

and all of Barnard Castle
descend here and... and dance.

# Dominic Cummings
broke lockdown rules

# His noble quest to test his eyes

# Dominic Cummings
came to Barnard Castle

# He was only doing
what any good father would do #

(LAUGHS)

It seems fitting, really,
to visit the location

where the anger
was completely fired.

It triggered, for me, the most
inspirational period, I think.

You know, I was doing stuff about
Brexit and the charlatans in charge.

I was doing it, you know, for ages.

But it was at that moment,
I think, that...

that... a lot of people thought,
"You know what? Fuck this."

MAN: 'Coronavirus restrictions
in northern England

'are going to include
Liverpool, Warrington,

'Hartlepool and Middlesbrough.

'It means, from Saturday,
people will be limited

'when it comes to socialising
between different households.'

BORIS JOHNSON: 'The more people
follow the rules,

'and reduce their social contact,

'the quicker we can get Liverpool
and the northeast back on...'

Last time we were up in Liverpool,

we were, um... that way,
in Albert Dock,

which is where we went
and did the site visit,

and then we found out that, um,

permission wasn't
going to be granted.

We had to supply the artwork,

and it went to the board
of the Albert Dock,

so there's obviously
some sort of, like,

private, commercial sort of angle
to that area.

Uh, and a load of people
got to have a say, basically,

on whether it was going
to be in there or not.

And I think it was three out
of four of the board members

said it wasn't appropriate,

they didn't want artwork
of a political nature, erm...

sat where it was gonna be.

So we were once again finding
ourselves without a home.

So, uh, yeah, we ended up over--
back over here, which is...

amazing, actually.

Could not be more Liverpool
if you tried.

We're, you know, smack bang at
the bottom of the Liver Building.

Uh, River Mersey, just there.

In between the two.
So, yeah, we lucked out.

That is amazing.

I think the twin axis, if you like,

of being kicked out
at the last possible moment,

having to find a new location,

and the backdrop of the
worsening COVID situation,

has made it very, very challenging.

So we're really lucky to be here.

We're very, very grateful to the
great city of Liverpool.

CARL: So, yeah, up until
eight o'clock last night,

we didn't know quite, 100 percent,
where we were gonna be in the city.

Two weeks in a row,
it's been a little bit hairy.

You all right, guys?Hi.
We're not in trouble, are we?

No, no, no. Come to finish it
for you.(ALL LAUGH)

ADAM: Experts!

Thank God, you see?
We want more from the experts.

Even the traffic wardens are nice.
Yeah! (LAUGHS)

MAN: It's just talking about the
current situation that we're in.

It's different parts
of the right wing,

like, uh, Donald Trump is on there,

Boris Johnson, Nigel Farage.

Uh, Adolf Hitler, Dominic Cummings.
Thanks, lads.

See you later, mate.
Have a good day.Cheers.

You too, mate, have a good day.

CARL: Embarrassingly, we've got
Les Dennis stood over there.

Oh, right, OK.
And we've got no artist.

Oh.I mean, in fairness,
Les is ten minutes early.

So, um...
True professional.

Excited?
Yes!

Here's the man.

Sorry, Les. (LAUGHTER)
How you doing? You all right?

Yeah.Nice one.Thanks for coming.
Nice to meet you.

Nice to meet you at last!
Properly, yeah.

Great work, I love it.
Thank you!

I got put onto your work by my,
um...

I don't know whether
you know Connor McIntyre?

He's one of the Coronation Street
characters.Oh, right! (LAUGHS)

You know Phelan?
Yeah, yeah.

And he's an artist, you know.
Oh, yes?

So he said, "Oh, this guy's great."
And I got into your stuff,

and then I rang him up and said,
"I'm in one!"You're...

(BOTH LAUGH) You're on a plane
with Trump.A plane with Trump.

Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

WOMAN: All right, Les?
WOMAN 2: You OK?

Oh, yeah. How you doing?
Take care.

You've got to give me a clue,
come and help me.

That is Trump.

He's unbelievably quiet, though.

He's not saying anything.
Yeah!

Well, you see...
Makes a change.

He knows if he comes to Liverpool,
people'll have a go back.

Well, thanks, Les.
Great. Thank you very much.

Thank you very much.I really
enjoyed that.That was brilliant.

I'm absolutely thrilled
to be part of it.

I think your work is amazing.
Oh, thank you. Great.

SAMIRA: In an age where there's
actually a lot of words out there,

um... including by politicians

who have their own social media
feeds--

"Ask Boris", "Ask Rishi Sunak"...

this response of his actually
kind of cuts through that

in a way that, 30 years ago,

Spitting Image
was genuinely dynamic,

because we weren't seeing people
satirised that way.

An it strikes me that
its moment was 30 years ago,

and the moment now
is Cold War Steve's.

MAN: '..President Trump has
tweeted,

'saying that he and the First Lady

'have tested positive for COVID-19.

'Let's go straight to Los Angeles
and our US correspondent...'

Come with me.

Welcome to my... supersized
Trumpscape jigsaw.

Couldn't be more pertinent,
this particular piece of work,

um, which is all about
Trump's America,

in the age of COVID-19.

So, I mean, we'll start
with the Trump section.

The monstrous, grotesque
man himself.

And he's imbibing,
uh, toilet cleaner.

Here we've got our anti-maskers,

with Trump fucking spewing
his bile and shit everywhere.

Uh, an old favourite of mine,
Steve Bannon.

Infiltrator of governments
worldwide.

Good friends with people
like Nigel Farage

and Boris Johnson as well.

Richard Branson.

The amount of money he's got,
you know,

why is he seeing taxpayer bailout
for...

for what everyone is,
you know, enduring?

So he's on there
with his pile of cash.

Because it's a stark
dystopian image, Trumpscape,

I did want chinks of positivity.

I made what I called the good boat.

You know, just people that were
saying positive things,

and very much anti-Trump rhetoric
from them.

And then, reference to our own
NHS, you know, key workers.

And then, on the horizon,
everything is going to be all right.

Harold Bishop parps
his tuba of hope.

You can't quite hear it,
but it's there in the distance.

So, even though I did this
probably four months ago,

nothing's changed, so this,
early days of lockdown,

and here we are now,
on the brink of another lockdown.

It has made things
a bit eerie, uh...

There's not... not as many people,
perhaps, have come to see it.

I mean, a lot of people have.
But, um...

I suppose it all adds to the
atmosphere of the piece, doesn't it?

I've noticed there
you can see, um...

Enoch Powell, Farage, and Hitler.

I'm thinking Thatcher
should be in with that lot.

It just sums up what's wrong
with the world, I think.

All these people, these men,
have got so much power,

and they've abused it.

That's my opinion, anyway.

Erm, you know,
you've got Hitler with Farage.

That is so apt.

Erm... There's just...

The people who could change
the world in so many ways,

they've got wealth,
you've got Bezos there,

you've got Trump,
you've got, er, Richard Branson.

They could change the world
for the good, and they're not.

They're abusing their own...

the money and the power
that they've got.

WOMAN: '..20 flood alerts in place,

'the weather forecasters are warning
of persistent, heavy rain

'throughout the day
as Storm Alex hist the country.'

Storm Alex
has, uh... has arrived.

Um, and that's been the only...

stormy feature
of my time in Liverpool.

I think, out of all of them so far,
it's been my favourite, um...

one to... to take part in
and visit and be involved in.

It's just been, compared to the
others,

such a breeze to install
and to just be around.Mm.

It's just been wonderful.

From the beginning,
I've been worried

that we're gonna
suddenly have to stop filming,

because it's...

It just seems
it's just closing in on us.

Two people said
that they got the ferry,

um, from New Brighton, actually,
to come and see the work today.

And when they boarded the ferry
to come and see it,

they were asked
if their journey was essential,

erm... and they said,
"Bloody right it is.

"I'm going to see
Cold War Steve's jigsaw!"

Uh... It... You know,
a race to the line.

Yeah.Get the piece
in Coventry,

um... before, you know,
total lockdown or whatever happens.

MAN: 'COVID cases
are rising sharply,

'and governments across Europe
are ratcheting up the controls

'on our everyday lives.

'But some scientists
from the UK and elsewhere

'have now signed the great...'

(LAUGHTER)

Here in the wonderful
Spaghetti Junction,

for the launch of the final Cold War
Steve Meets the Outside World piece.

So, the final artwork
is a giant postcard,

and in the true spirit
of meeting the outside world,

instead of sending a tweet
which is instantly read,

this is, a... old-school analogue...
postcard

that's being delivered
to Coventry on a barge.

Aah, and there's the barge.

I actually completed
the artwork a week ago,

if not less than that.

And at that time, it was when
there was a lot of protest

against, um, masks and COVID and...

you know, how COVID
is just a conspiracy.

So I wanted to have that on there,

and also, obviously,
something to do with

the government's handling
of the coronavirus.

Where's the skipper?
CARL: Where is the skipper?

Good to meet you, skipper.

Hello, how are you?
Yeah! Ahoy.

How you doing?
(LAUGHS) Yeah, I'm good, thanks.

Thank you so much for doing this.
It's all right. It's been great.

It's been a brilliant trip here.
I've had a great time.(LAUGHS)

To launch the vessel, we've got

someone who's actually appearing
in the artwork,

and I've also got a couple of
showbiz pals coming along,

hopefully, as well.

Robert Kilroy-Silk used to end
every show of Kilroy with,

"Take care of yourselves."

That's where it's from.

Who are you gonna address it to?

The outside world,
I'm gonna address it to.

Aah! Here's Dominic Cummings!

Carl's having to escort him,

because of, uh, his terrible
eyesight, of course.

You all right, Dom?

I christen this vessel...
(LAUGHS)

..in the name of Dominic Cummings.

May you have a safe journey
to Coventry,

as Britain will be safe!

God bless.

(LAUGHS)

Special guest appearance by...

Ant and Dec!

Hi, fellas!

See ya later, lads.

Thanks for coming down, fellas.

First time ever on a barge.
Yeah, me too.

Me too.

Last week, first time
building a jigsaw.

It's just full of firsts.

Right next to the Spaghetti Junction
and the M6. (SIREN WAILING)

Ahoy!
Hello, there!

That's a great setup!

It's weird,
I used to walk down this canal

with my eldest child in a buggy,

from where we lived
to Sainsbury's down there.

There's probably still a few
empty bottles of wine hidden.

Yep. First lock action.

But I tell you want. Locks are
analogue, aren't they?

Locks are old-school.

Much like the postcard.

MAN: Hello?

First maisonette that me and Kate
rented is that end one there,

on the ground floor.
Wow.

When Isabel, our oldest...
eldest daughter was born,

that's where we took her back to.

Never would I have thought that,
in, like, 15 years' time,

I would be sending a giant postcard
down the canal.

That's it, go now, go now.

(GRINDING)

Lovely bit of work, Chris.

OMID: The whole point of being
a stand-up comedian,

if you wanna do satire, is
to say what people are thinking

but would never dare say.

What Cold War Steve does,

he does it so economically,
with one image,

and because people
have that connection

with making collages at school,

you see it and you think,
"Oh, my God. This is--

"I'm used to this.
It's a very familiar artform."

And the messages are immediate.

And the point is,
anybody could do it.

What Banksy does,
anybody could do.

But the genius is they've
actually got up and done it.

Why have you got, um...

He's the one from, um, the band,
what's it called?

What band is it?The Stone Roses.
The Stone Roses.Yes.

And that's... I recognise that one.
David... Icke.

Oh, yes. Is he still around?
It's very clever.

I don't know.
It's brilliant.He's the artist.

And that... Who's that guy?
He's, uh... Right Said Fred.Yes!

Yes!Look, she's right on it!
I'm right on it.

Oh, we know who that is. (LAUGHS)

(WIND GUSTING)

We were just wondering what the
update was with Coventry?

I understand maybe it's become
a bit stricter, all of a sudden.

MAN ON PHONE:

Just to be clear, then,
what aren't we allowed to do?

In theory, what are they saying
we cannot do?

(ENGINE CHUGGING)

MAN: I like the idea
that Cold War Steve

could be a socio-political
commentator

as well as an artist.

Art can be the hymns
that are in a church,

as much as it can be the postcard
on the barge

from Birmingham to Coventry.

Both of them are transporting
messages

that they want
the community to hear.

It's really strange, this is.

I've just finished a piece,
big sculptural piece,

uh... which is based on
the Ship of Fools.

Yeah?
Which has...

exactly the same characters in,
plus Rees-Mogg.

So, uh, it's very,
very funny, that is.

Ooh, quarantine rave!

(LAUGHS)

Who's the one underneath?

Oh, it's Cummings! He's-- (LAUGHS)

(LAUGHING)

What's happening?
You know how Coventry

was supposed to be really...

easy and...
Straightforward?Yeah.

Yeah?
Yeah.

They don't want you in the, uh...

They don't want you in the Basin.

They're saying that the, uh...

They don't want the boat,
or me, or...

They don't want the artwork
in the Basin.In the Basin?

They don't want it displayed
in the Basin.

Er, if the boat goes
into the Basin,

the artwork has to be covered over.
(LAUGHS)

(GROANS) Oh, man.

Yeah.

Come on, then.

Maybe they're all fans
of Right Said Fred.

Hey, look at this.

It's brilliant, mate. Fantastic.

Yeah, celebrations are in order.

All right, cheers, mate.
Cheers, mate.

Bye.
Let's hear the good news?

Good news. The cultural department
have done a U-turn,

and have basically said,

"We'd like you to take the boat
into the Basin,

"where people can attend
and have a look at the artwork."

Whooo!
Yes!

For the first time, I feel wanted.

Welcomed. Which is nice.

Cos, like I said, this isn't,
you know...

This isn't nasty and cynical.
It's not gonna distress anybody.

MAN ON PHONE: 'Hello?'
CARL: Hey, Julian, how are you?

'I'm good, thanks.'We've just been
on a boat for the last two hours,

so we haven't got a clue
what's going on.

Do I take it, from an
announcement point of view--

obviously, we've been quite coy

about the fact we're gonna be
ending in Coventry this week.

Are we--
Is there any change with that?

You know, can we say
we're gonna be there?

Mmm.

Right.

OK.Fine. All right.
'Yeah.'

OK.No, that's fair enough.

MAN: '..number of positive cases
in England has been rising

'for over a month,

'and the latest set of weekly data
from NHS Test and Trace

'shows no sign
of this upward trend halting...'

Cold War Steve
Meets the Outside World.

Takes on a bit of an Odyssey now.

It's actually the first time
I've come to Nuneaton

since I was at art college.

Nunueaton itself can be quite
dispiriting.

But, um... nice people.
Not the art college,

going to art college.No,
the art college was... was good.

Fun.
Yep.

What made you want to go to art
college?

It was always the one thing
that I was sort of good at.

You know, when kids are good at
something?Yeah.

Mine was art and impressions.

And when you left...
Did you pursue the degree?

Yeah. Um...

But what went wrong?

I, uh...

I don't... I think at that age,
I wasn't...

I dunno, probably not mature
or focused enough,

I don't think, to be honest.

Just fucking... I don't know,
it's a really odd time, really.

Um... didn't know what
I wanted to do.

I just fucked around
and then got hideously in debt.

And then it started a career of,
uh...

factory work and, you know...

Back to art?
Horrible jobs.

And it's a shame, cos my nan,
who died a few years ago,

she was the one who was always
trying to get me to do art.

She was... she'd, you know,
buy me the equipment,

take me to galleries and, um...

Her last sort of
memories of me is...

sort of being
a low-paid road worker...

uh, with a drink problem,
uh, and...

like, going to her
and asking her for a loan.

It's a step that
I was really dubious about.

And you know, would my work
transfer to something big?

And they've looked great.
Yeah.I've ab--

Yeah. Really pleased
with how everything's gone,

and I think that's given me
a lot of confidence

to say, "Yeah, I am an artist."

I am...

a goddamn artist.

There's a-- a thing
that all artists yearn for,

which is an instantly
recognisable style.

You can immediately say,
"That's Cold War Steve."

And it's funny, I mean,
it usually makes you smile.

You're not quite sure why.
It's not saying...

It's not rude.

It's not abusive.

And yet, it has a... a...

a strength to it,
it has a kind of resonant anger

that... that you can't
easily forget.

Cold War Steve's images now
really have a visceral power.

It speaks to now, and that's
what makes great satire.

It's not worried about the future.

Um, and they're beautiful.

I mean, you could just
stare at them for hours.

It's that combination
of Where's Wally?

something quite childlike,

with, you know, the kind of
great mediaeval artworks.

I think Chris--
uh, Cold War Steve, has...

has done something that's unique.

And he does make me laugh.

And he makes me laugh
and think at the same time.

To me, this is like a breath of
artistic, political fresh air.

So this is the fucking bridge?
This is the bridge there.

Is it that small?
It looks small! (LAUGHS)

That's the bridge.Yeah, we're
not gonna get through there.

Yeah. Bridge number one.
(GROANS)

Nice one.
Hold on!

Forwards...

(GROANING)

Steady on.
Yeah.

Got loads of room to play with!

What was everybody worried about?
What was... Yeah!

"We'll never get through!

"It'll be the last thing that stops
us getting to Coventry Canal!"

# We don't know any more #

Good!
Turned up.

Hello, Coventry!

It's a triumphant moment,

being able to bring this giant
postcard into Coventry,

but it's tinged with sadness
that the journey is over,

and I must once again recoil
into my cocoon,

get back up into the loft,

turn on the computer...
Make sure that it's you.(LAUGHS)

The material
is gonna keep flooding in,

so I've gotta keep working.

Um, but this has been
an amazing experience,

meeting the outside world.

But now, I must go.

Ladies and gentlemen, Cold War Steve
is leaving the outside world.

# Now the party's over

# I'm so tired

# Much communication

# Out of nowhere

# Avalon #

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