Original subtitles

What are you trying to do?

I will kill every one of these savages that I find.

Must have stumbled on a small hunting party,

or they'd have finished the job, and they could come back.

Turn him loose, and let's get out of here.

I don't take orders from you,

only from the Countess, Olga Baranof!

Countess Baranof?

Yes, from the court of Alexander II.

We'll discuss that later.

Right now, let's get out of here. Turn him loose.

They killed my horses and my men!

I don't turn him loose!

Now, let's get out of here.

We'll stay here till it's dark,

then we'll go back to the carriage and pick up some things.

And you'd better give me that pig-sticker.

Somehow or other, I don't trust you.

With this I protect my Countess until I am dead.

Only then do I surrender it.

I'll take it any way you insist, but I'm taking it.

Give it to him, Vasily.

I don't want you to die quite yet.

Besides, I don't think he means to harm us.

I obey your wish... reluctantly.

Might as well go over here and get off our feet,

get comfortable.

On your feet!

A peasant does not sit in the presence of a Countess!

I warn you, Countess, the American does not know his place.

Don't mind him. He doesn't know the customs of your country yet.

Sometimes I think he's even more class-conscious than what we are.

Are you laughing at me?

Oh, no, no, but do you realize what the odds are

against my running into a real Russian countess out here?

I suppose it's not to be expected.

Wait till I tell the Major about this.

The Major?

He's the fellow that's the wagon master

for the train that I scout for.

Incidentally, if you're going west,

you could travel with us.

You'd be a lot safer.

Are there many wagons to the train?

Oh, a hundred or so. Perhaps I could buy one.

No, I'm afraid they're all occupied,

but, uh, I'm sure we could double you up with somebody.

Oh, I would be most grateful.

To a peasant?

Oh, I'm sorry for that.

This is Vasily's first trip out of his own country,

and although he's my personal bodyguard,

he's a high-ranking officer in the Tsar's Cossacks.

Colonel Vasily Ygors.

In Russia, he commands almost as much respect as nobility.

Well, out here, I'm afraid he's just another man moving west,

and the sooner he realizes that,

the easier his life's gonna be.

Speaking of moving west...

What is a Russian countess doing in this wilderness?

I'm on my way to Alaska, and I'm in a dreadful hurry.

Alaska?

I do hope that you can help me.

Oh, it's shameless of me to ask you to help me.

You have done so much already,

and I don't even know your name.

Oh, it's, uh... it's McCullough, ma'am.

Flint McCullough.

Indian scout and first-class peasant.

Oh. I'm sorry, Mr. McCullough.

How can I ever make up for the insult

that you suffered at the hands of Colonel Ygors?

Oh, I don't know. We'll think of something.

Hey, Charlie.

Major.

What the heck's McCullough bringing in with him now?

What kind of an outfit's that fellow with him wearing?

Looks like a Russian soldier.

Where do you suppose he found them?

Maybe he went to "Roosha."

If McCullough had to go that far to get a girl as pretty as that one,

maybe he did go to "Roosha."

Howdy, fellas. Howdy, Flint.

Major, I'd like to present the Countess Olga Baranof.

This is Bill Hawks... Hi, ma'am.

Charlie Wooster, and, of course, our wagon master, Major Adams.

Major Adams.

Ma'am.

And her aide, um...

Colonel Vasily Ygors.

Did you say Countess?

Yes. She and her party have come all the way from Washington, D.C.,

but they ran into an attacking band of Indians

that killed her guards, turned over her carriage...

And my beautiful horses, Major,

a perfectly matched team of purebred horses

given to me in Washington by Eduard de Stoeckl.

That de Stoeckl, he's the Russian minister to the United States.

Yes, and an old friend of my family.

But I'm surprised that you should know about him way out here.

Well, ma'am, we don't always have the latest events out here,

but every time we pass a telegraph station,

we manage to pick up little bits of news here and there.

Last time I heard of your man de Stoeckl,

he was trying to negotiate a deal with our Secretary of State Mr. Seward

to get us to buy Alaska.

Of all the things in the world for us to buy, is Alaska!

We've only got 19 million acres of vacant land out here.

What do we want with a big hunk of ice and snow up there?

You don't approve of it, Major?

I can't imagine anybody in their right mind

even going there for a visit, let alone to live.

That's my destination, Major.

I beg your pardon?

Alaska. That is where I'm going to live.

Well, ma'am, that's me.

I open my big mouth and stick both feet in it.

I'm... I'm sorry.

That's perfectly all right, Major.

But in view of your opinion, I'm afraid I have some bad news for you.

Oh?

William Seward and Eduard de Stoeckl

already have negotiated and signed a treaty

for the sale of Alaska to the United States

for $7 million.

$7 million?

What's the matter with that fellow Seward?

First he wants us to buy the Danish West Indies,

and now he wants us to buy Alaska!

Thank heaven the Senate refused to ratify the West Indies deal.

Maybe they'll vote down this Alaskan purchase.

I wouldn't count on it, Major.

Maybe you and I will just make ourselves a little wager on this sometime later.

Right now I'd imagine you'd rather get settled than argue about treaties.

I have had a rather exhausting day today.

I'll bet maybe we could put the Countess in supply wagon number two.

That'd be fine, Flint.

I'll make sure that she's comfortable.

Oh, Colonel,

you'll be able to negotiate here with the Major.

These are the only two peasants we have on the train.

Bill, what's a peasant?

Well, Charlie, if I can remember right,

I figure it's about one grade lower than an Indian scout.

Oh, Charlie.

Ah...

the title of Major is no doubt just, uh... how do you say?

Nickname, judging from the absence of a uniform

and your obvious lack of military bearing.

Well, mister, for your information,

I happen to be a commissioned officer

of the Army of the United States of America,

on inactive duty.

Oh. In that case, I will negotiate with you,

regardless of your appearance.

What in tarnation's wrong with my appearance?

You're joking, of course.

Mister, when I'm joking, you'll know it.

If you came out here expecting to attend a full-dress military ball,

you came to the wrong place and you're talking to the wrong man.

If you want to join this wagon train,

you'll have to negotiate with me,

whether you like my appearance or not!

Very well!

I'm Colonel Vasily Ygors,

of Tsar Alexander II's Cossacks.

In behalf of the Countess Olga Baranof,

I wish to purchase a night's lodging,

one well-appointed conveyance,

a team of your fastest horses,

and one of your best drivers.

Well, we can accommodate you on this train for as far as you want to go,

but we haven't got any horses or wagons for sale.

I can only pay a reasonable price for horses and wagon.

I just said we don't have any for sale.

But I insist!

Maybe you don't understand English.

I just told you, we don't have any horses

or any wagons for sale!

But you cannot refuse the request of Countess Baranof!

I can't, huh? Well, you're a little late, mister. I just did!

But it is not done.

Maybe not in Russia, but you're not in Russia now.

This happens to be a big hunk of land known as the United States,

and if you don't want to accept my hospitality,

you can stay right here.

Is that clear? Right here.

Major, I beg to remind you

that you are addressing a Colonel,

who, as a visiting emissary,

is due the respect of his grade.

However, in view of the fact that you are in command

of this, uh, this gypsy garrison on wheels,

I am obligated by military protocol

to refrain from enforcing my superior rank!

I will overlook your insubordination!

My insubordination?!

After you have reconsidered the request of Countess Baranof,

you will find me in my quarters. Bill!

We will continue negotiations...

Personally, of course.

Do not send one of your serfs!

Aah!

What's a serf?

Oh, shut up you... peasant!

Charlie, why do you always manage to upset the Major this way?

Me? Yeah, you.

There you are.

Not quite as fancy as that carriage of yours, but it's a lot stronger.

It will do fine.

It's hardly befitting a Countess at that.

Nobility is not synonymous with weakness, Mr. McCullough.

Our blood is strong, and so is our will.

If there's anything you need, you let me know.

You have been kind enough.

That's very easy when the lady is as lovely as you are.

I think I'll drop by from time to time

just to make sure that you're all right.

That is, if you have no objections.

I'll be very disappointed if you don't,

at the earliest opportunity.

Isn't this overdoing the bodyguard?

Oh, I put your pig-sticker inside,

but I wouldn't draw it again unless you intend to use it.

The peasants around here won't respect your uniform.

Vasily, come here.

Well?

Forgive me, Countess, but I failed to acquire

the team and wagon that you need.

That pig who commands the train,

he not only refused your request, but he became insulting!

Always you get insulted, Vasily!

You have a talent for bringing the worst out in people.

I serve my Countess with fierce loyalty.

I know Vasily, but I didn't really expect you

to have any success with the Major.

But the Major isn't the only one

with influence here.

The scout.

Yes. If Flint McCullough would like to help me badly enough, he could.

Hm. An Indian scout.

What is it, Vasily?

I... dare not say.

We're not in Russia now.

You can speak to me openly.

As a man to a woman?

That's what we are, aren't we?

If I could speak to you that way,

I would warn you against

any further relationship with the scout.

You don't trust him, after he saved our lives?

It is not he who I do not trust.

Me?

I have never seen you look at any other man

the way you look at the scout.

Vasily, what do you know of the way I look at men?

Everything there is to know.

For seven years, I have been your bodyguard,

and for seven years, I have not been able to...

To take my eyes from you.

Vasily!

I would not dare say this under any other circumstances,

but surely you must have known that my loyalty to you

was not inspired by just duty.

Oh.

I'm sorry, Vasily, but I had no idea.

You must have felt something during those years,

but there's nothing more for me to do but to speak of my love

because you are nobility, I am not.

Whatever there is to be done about it

is up to you, Countess.

I appreciate your loyalty, Vasily,

but I have to tell you the truth.

I love no man yet,

and when I do,

it will have no importance what his station is.

I hope it won't be a lowly Indian scout.

Hardly an Indian scout, Vasily,

but I shall use Mr. McCullough

for our purpose.

Yes. We must get to Sitka before it is too late...

at any price.

Yes.

At any price.

Is there any reason why you can't tell me

why you're in such a rush to go to Alaska?

No, there is no reason why I couldn't tell you the truth.

If I don't reach Sitka before your Senate makes the purchase legal,

I shall lose $1 million.

You mean you own part of it?

A small part,

but a very important part of it.

Baranof Island, where Sitka is situated,

is the government seat.

Alexander I gave the island to my great-grandfather,

who was the first Russian ambassador to Alaska.

It's ever since belonged to our family.

I am the sole surviving heir.

Why don't you inherit it just automatically?

A Baranof must be resident of the island

at the time when the purchase is ratified,

or else they forfeit all the rights to it.

For once, I agree with the Major,

because I think the Senate's gonna turn you down.

Mmm, mustn't think that, Flint.

Eduard de Stoeckl told me that it was almost a certainty.

He even has the money to buy the votes for it.

You want me to believe that you can buy the United States Senate?

That's the rumor in Washington,

and I just came from there.

Ah, that's a lot of rot.

Will you help me to get to San Francisco?

You know I will.

I knew I could count on you.

Does it always take a million dollars

to make your eyes shine like that?

No, it's you who makes me happy, Flint.

But money's important too.

There have been great reforms in Russia of late.

We the landowners had to give big plots of land to our serfs,

who were freed by law,

and now we are deeply indebted.

But all that's going to be all right, with you helping me.

We must be leaving soon,

as soon as you get the wagon and the fast team of horses.

I don't have very much money,

but I know that you can get a bargain.

And I shall have to get supplies.

But I wont' be able to get a wagon for you out here.

But you said you were going to help me.

Sure. I'll help you to get to San Francisco,

and there you'll be able to catch a ship,

but you'll have to travel with the train.

But the train's too slow.

Days count. Hours count.

Olga, a wagon when it's moving with a train

means a lot more than just a wagon.

It's as important for survival

as a ship is in the middle of the ocean.

It's a means of protection.

It means a lot more to these people than it would to you.

But as soon as we get to a village,

I'll go and buy one for you if I can, and find you a team.

I don't have much time anymore.

I'm sorry if you misunderstood me.

I don't think I did misunderstand you.

I think you deliberately misled me

so that you could make love to me.

No, that isn't true,

but I'm sorry you said that

because it means you let me make love to you

to use me for your own purposes.

Good! Give it to me!

I wish you would let me carry it for you, Countess.

Vasily, use your imagination.

How am I going to rouse any gallantry

in the heart of a wagon owner if I'm already being served?

Go the wagon!

As you wish.

Serf.

Hey, serf.

SERF! What's the matter?

Come on, Charlie, get your bucket.

We have to go get some water.

Me? Yeah, you and me. Come on.

Listen, if I ever find out what that word "serf" means,

I'll let you carry all the water by yourself.

If you'd gone to school, you'd probably know what it means, huh?

Oh, you and your education.

You know, Bill, on second thought,

I think I'll let you carry both buckets.

They balance much better that way. They do, huh?

Yeah.

Yeah, they sure do.

Pardon me, Your Countess-ship,

could I help you with this heavy bucket?

Charlie means well, ma'am, but I don't think he's strong enough,

so I'll carry it for you.

Who said I ain't strong enough?

You're not as young as you used to be, Charlie.

Who said that? Why don't you just take a walk?

I saw her bucket first, and I'm gonna carry it.

Mnh-mnh. I'm gonna carry it.

My name is Alex Foster. At your service.

I'm the Countess Olga Baranof, and I'd be most grateful.

Now look what you did.

What I did?

Oh, there you are, young lady.

Thank you, Mr. Foster.

Oh, Alex. Anybody that knows me more than five minutes

and still calls me Mr. Foster, I figure don't like me.

Oh, Alex, then, by all means.

Yes, sir, you and I are gonna get along just fine.

I hope so.

You seem different than the other men on the wagon train.

They're kind of rough.

Well...

maybe it's because some of them have never been anywhere

or seen anything of the world before.

Oh, you have traveled extensively? Oh, yes.

Why, I've been to St. Louis before I was 18 years old.

Is that a fact?

Lived there for six months once.

Been to New York too.

And why are you going to California?

One day, I decided I wanted to.

It's the land of opportunity, they say, for a man with ideas,

and Alex Foster's going to give them the opportunity to find it.

I like a man of decision.

Oh, I, um...

I thought you'd be asleep, Susan.

I know where you've been, Alex.

I said I know where you were tonight,

and this afternoon and most of this morning.

I don't want to have to fight with you, Susan.

Then why do you do it to every pretty face you see?

Do we have to go through it again?

Don't I have any rights? I'm your wife!

Only because you won't let me go.

It's no good, Susan,

and you know it as well as I do.

I'm never gonna be a dirt farmer,

and you're never gonna be happy if I'm not.

If you'd only settle down.

I'm not the settling-down type, Susan. I never will be.

We're not right for each other. Why won't you admit it and let me go free?

Because I married you for better or for worse, until death do us part.

I can't break that vow.

Then I'll have to!

Alex, no, no.

Susan.

Susan... you know how I've always said

that someday I'll find that one chance in a lifetime?

Well, I've found it.

With that countess?

If I let you stop me, I can only hate you for it.

I'm sorry, Susan, but I've got to leave you.

She's turned your head with her fancy ways.

I'll arrange for you to finish the trip with the Parkers.

Here's our stake. You can have all of it,

and anything else you want in the wagon here.

I'm taking the wagon and the team,

and I'm leaving the train the first thing in the morning.

Alex, please, don't!

I've got to.

It's the only way out for me, Susan.

That's the way I am.

Alex?

Major! Major Adams, wake up!

Oh, Charlie, I don't... Major?

Oh. Oh, Mrs. Foster, hello.

Major, please, you've got to help me.

What's the matter? What's the trouble?

It's my husband Alex, you've got to stop him.

Oh? Stop him from what?

From leaving me for that Russian woman. The Countess?

Yes. They're going away together in the morning. He's gonna take our wagon.

What does he want to do a fool thing like that for?

Money, I think. Who knows what else.

So the Countess finally got what she wanted after all, huh?

A wagon, a team, a driver.

She sure is in a hurry to get to Alaska, isn't she?

Stop Alex, Major. You can do it.

Don't let him leave me.

Well, Mrs. Foster, I don't know how

I can stop a man from leaving his wife if he wants to go.

I... that's kind of a personal matter, isn't it?

I love him, Major.

Well, if, uh...

I don't know what I can do, Mrs. Foster.

You could talk to him, try to bring him to his senses.

But what right have I got to interfere?

You're the only person I can turn to.

You've got to help me.

Well, all right, I'll try.

FLINT: Hey, Major, uh... why don't you leave this to me?

I know exactly what to do.

I don't think you've got any more right to talk to Alex than I have...

Maybe not as much!

I didn't say I wanted to talk to him.

Oh, I see!

I wondered why you were moping around here all day

with your face as long as an old cow.

Do you really think you can do something about Alex, Mr. McCullough?

Maybe, indirectly.

Mrs. Foster,

if there's anything I can say good about McCullough,

it's that he can handle a situation like this

better than anybody I know.

Thanks, Major. I appreciate the confidence.

Now, don't you worry a bit about it.

It's in the best possible hands.

Flint'll handle it for you. You'll be all right.

I don't want to go back to my wagon.

I'll spend the rest of the night with Blanche Parker.

All right, fine. I don't want to be alone, anyway.

Don't you worry, I'll keep your little secret for you.

Oh, Russians! Countesses! Ohh!

What...?!

I came here to talk, so you'll gain nothing by making noise.

I don't want to talk to you.

Then be quiet.

Why did you have to do that?

Because I've never been so wrong about a woman in my life.

Are you sure? I wish I weren't,

and I wish I didn't care.

Don't make me laugh.

Why not? You've been a great source of amusement to me.

I could have fallen in love with you. How's that for a start?

Funny? The first time I kissed you, the thought entered my mind

that with a woman like you, I could be content to stay

in one place for the rest of my life.

That's the funniest part of all. You really ought to laugh there.

I never stopped to think what a ridiculous match it would be.

I only knew how I felt. That's why I kissed you just now,

to find out how I could have been so wrong!

And did you? I don't know!

Oh, that's right, you don't know.

I'm finding out, one way or another.

You'd go to any length to get what you want,

like Alex Foster.

Oh, I only offered him a great sum of money,

and he was willing enough to go to Alaska to get it.

I don't mean what it's gonna cost you.

I mean what it's gonna cost Susan Foster.

Who? Susan, Foster's wife.

His wife?!

Well, you didn't think he was gonna bring her along, did you?

Flint, I didn't know that he had a wife.

You're telling the truth, aren't you?

You know I am.

She went to the Major just a few minutes ago

and begged the Major to talk Foster out of going with you.

You needn't worry now about that.

You mean that?

I mean it,

and I'm not laughing.

I never was.

We don't have much of a chance, you know.

I know.

I mean...

we're worlds apart.

There is so much against us.

Very much.

Maybe too much.

Maybe.

Olga.

Olga.

Countess, wake up!

Vasily, what are you doing here?

I must talk to you.

Now? Don't be ridiculous! Speak to me tomorrow.

It's most important.

Nothing is important enough to bring you to my bedside in the middle of the night.

I have reason to believe that you have abandoned your plans.

What reason have you?

Vasily, you were eavesdropping!

The canvas is thin. I could not help but hear.

All right, so you heard it.

And we are going to continue with the wagon train all the way to San Francisco.

But the money... You will lose the money.

It has lost much of its importance now.

I'm no longer sure it's worth all it was going to cost,

and we may get to Sitka anyhow in time.

I have learned there are more important things than money.

Yes. The scout.

Vasily!

Have you forgotten who you are?

Your responsibility to Russia?

And what about my responsibility to myself?

That is the trouble with you of noble birth...

You have always thought only of yourselves!

Vasily, you are insubordinate!

Really? I order you to get out at once!

You order nobody, not anymore.

You and your kind are through.

The people are rising against you,

but you wouldn't know anything about that, would you?

You are never in Russia long enough to have any idea what's going on.

Even the people who are there

are not aware of their danger.

You are wasting your time.

I already have it.

Now, just sit down.

Sit down.

Now I will tell you how things are going to be from now on.

You will do exactly as I say,

and I will only warn you once.

You'll do everything I say because if you do not,

I will kill you.

More than that,

I will kill your beloved Indian scout.

Now, we are going to Alaska,

where you will receive your money.

You will then turn it over to me.

You see, I need it badly...

Not for myself,

but to help finance the overthrowing of you and your kind.

You're out of your mind!

Perhaps.

But if you're still alive a month from now,

you will see Tsar Alexander assassinated,

and you will know that your money paid the one who did it

and the guards who turned their backs!

Now, very quietly,

we will go and find your new friend, Alex Foster.

You will tell him nothing of our new relationship.

Do not forget, I am a Cossack,

more skilled in the art of killing

than any soldier in the world.

You forced me into doing this, you know.

Mnh.

It would have been so much easier

if you could have loved me,

and far more pleasant.

But I was not good enough for you, was I?

Not if you had been the Tsar himself!

Get dressed.

We're leaving tonight.

I've got some!

Good morning, gentlemen!

Major! How 'bout a cup of that wonderful coffee, Charlie?

Got it right here. What's wrong with him?

Sounds to me like he had too much sleep.

It's gonna be a beautiful day, huh?

From the sound of you, it must have been a beautiful night.

Let's put it this way, Major...

It's as beautiful a day for Susan Foster as it is for me.

She's gonna be a very happy woman.

Alex is not leaving, not today.

Well, I'm glad of that. Major Adams.

Major Adams, it's terrible! It's just terrible!

What's terrible?

Susan Foster... she's lying there, and there's blood!

She's lying where?

She's lying where the wagon was.

"Was"?

Her husband took it and ran off with that Countess!

Oh, Major Adams, poor Susan!

I'm afraid she's dead. She's just lying there!

How'd this happen to you, Mrs. Foster?

Alex left me for that woman. He left me.

I mean who stabbed you?

She did. The Countess?

No, you mean her bodyguard, the man in the uniform.

No, she did it.

I tried to stop 'em from leaving.

She stabbed me!

She stayed with me last night after an argument.

She couldn't sleep, and later she said she was going to talk to her husband.

This morning, I found her like this.

Well, it's just your arm, Mrs. Foster. You'll be all right.

You want us to saddle the horses? Yeah.

Oh, don't bother, Bill, I'll go after her.

I've got a personal stake in this. Flint.

I can see you at Canyon City...

I know, but, uh...

listen, I know this Countess has been getting under your skin.

I just don't want you to make a fool out of yourself.

Not a chance.

All right, good luck.

You feel all right?

Certainly I feel all right. Why shouldn't I?

What did you do, poison the coffee?

Not yet, but that's the first time I ever saw McCullough leave

without you saying, "Stay away from the girls. Hurry back."

Charlie, I don't think McCullough would appreciate being yelled at this morning,

particularly about women.

Think he's stuck on her, huh?

More than that, Bill.

I'm afraid our boy has finally met his match.

It's gonna be kind of tough on him, taking her to jail, isn't it?

Yeah, I think so.

Jail?

Yeah, jail.

I'll get the bedrolls, Vasily.

You take the horses down to the creek and water them.

I don't care much for your choice of drivers.

You'd better instruct him to stop ordering me around

or we'll travel without him. He's not much help anyway.

As long as you still want him to believe you're my servant,

you'd better act like one.

I take orders only from the Countess, remember?

Now, tell him!

It's a long way to Alaska,

and you can't touch the money without me,

so you'd better tell him yourself.

Uh, I will take care of this. You water the horses.

Now, just a minute. I told you to do that.

I don't take orders from you.

What?

Furthermore, I don't like you.

Try to order me one more time,

and your head will be severed from your body.

Countess.

Olga.

This man is out of his head. Call him off.

Perhaps you'd better listen to him, what he says.

Sometimes his temper is quicker than my tongue.

Even I couldn't order him to replace your head

once he has swung that saber.

Well, I, uh...

I guess I'll water the horses. Now, uh...

why don't you put this thing away?

There's no reason why we can't be friendly.

It's going to be a long trip.

Yes, it is, and I don't want to be concerned

every time you get behind me, so give me your gun.

My gun?

But I might have to use it. We might see Indians.

You probably couldn't hit one anyway.

Now, give it to me or I'll take it from your body.

Now, go water the horses,

and do not speak to me unless I speak to you first.

Yes, sir.

Do it!

Yes, sir.

Where are you going?

Well, I'm just going to go talk to Olga.

Well, don't talk too loud.

I want to get some sleep.

What's the matter with him, anyway?

I told you, he doesn't like you.

I hope he's never lost that temper of his with you.

Of course not. He's my bodyguard.

I suppose in Russia you could have him beheaded

for talking back to you, couldn't you?

I never thought about that.

Well, I'll try not to upset him anymore.

I want this to be as pleasant a trip as possible for us.

You know, Olga,

in all my travels,

I think I can safely say

I've never met a woman quite like you.

Is that so?

Without a doubt.

And that includes New Orleans too.

Did I tell you I've been in New Orleans?

No, I don't think so.

Oh, yes, I've been there.

It's a beautiful city. French, you know.

And the women...

The most beautiful women in the world,

in my opinion,

but none, none that can compare to you.

Alex.

Yes, Olga?

Would you remove your hand from my hand,

before I slap your face.

But I thought...

You had no reason to think anything.

Of course you didn't say that we would ever become anything but friends,

but we were so obviously attracted to each other right from the beginning

that I thought it was understood.

What gave you that impression, that I was interested in you?

The best reason in the world...

You're a woman, and I'm a man.

There's one thing I wish you were...

A man.

Flint, darling!

Oh, be careful of Vasily!

He's armed! He'll kill you!

He's asleep, and I took his gun.

Oh, I'm so relieved that you came.

Last night before I went to sleep,

I-I was praying that you would find me,

and when I opened my eyes, there you were.

You mean you wanted me to find you?

You knew I did.

I knew you couldn't imagine

that I'd just leave without a word to you,

unless somebody forced me to.

Alex?

No, Vasily. He's a revolutionist.

And he is standing right here,

with a gun.

What's the matter, Indian scout?

Once I held a saber in my hand,

and you drew your pistol with amazing speed and disarmed me.

It's different now that I too hold a gun, no?

Vasily, don't, please.

Aha! The Countess too is different now, have you noticed?

She begs me and says please.

Why don't you say please too?

I don't figure it'll do me any good.

You're right. It is obvious that I must kill you.

That's all I wanted to know.

Why? Do you think there is anything you can do to prevent that?

Might be.

You fascinate me!

I admire your calmness in the face of death.

You might have made a good Cossack.

Not if they're in the habit of shooting a man

without giving him some kind of a chance.

Ah, yes. I have heard of your quaint custom of a duel,

how you spend years practicing to draw your weapon with speed.

But the Cossack considers marksmanship far more important.

Sometimes. Not always.

It is when your adversary already has gun in hand, wouldn't you say?

Yeah, but in the years that I've been carrying a gun,

I've found out there's something else that's important too.

Yes? What?

That a man can shoot another man while he's blinking his eye.

I've got to talk with you.

But of course, darling. But let's get out of this dreadful place.

We have plenty of time on our way to the wagon train.

You mean you want to go back to the wagon train?

You don't expect me to continue west with that one.

Olga, I don't know much about the customs in Russia

nor what immunity you might expect from your nobility,

but... well, here in America,

when somebody stabs somebody, it's against the law.

They sent me to find you to take you back to Canyon City,

to jail.

You just make yourself at home, young fella.

I'll be right back.

All right, Marshal.

Whoop!

Come right on in, folks, come right on in.

I'll be right with you, just a minute. Right back.

Howdy, Major.

I'm glad to see you made it, Flint.

I'm glad you got the message.

We made camp about a mile out of town.

Just got in last night.

Where's that loudmouthed bodyguard of Her Ladyship's?

He's dead. It was him or me.

Where's my Alex?

Don't worry about him, Mrs. Foster.

All you gotta do now is sign a complaint against her,

and then we can get back to the train.

Before you sign anything, I'd like to have a word with you.

Yes, sir. Uh...

Mrs. Foster, is this the woman that stabbed you?

No, Mr. McCullough, I'm glad to say it isn't.

What did you say?

She... the Countess didn't do it.

Well, then, who did?

I did.

I... made the wound myself.

You? Well...

It was the only way I could think of

for somebody to get Alex back for me.

It hurt something awful.

Well, this is the galdarnest thing I ever heard of in my...

She wasn't even locked up. No.

How'd you know she didn't do it? She told me.

Oh, she told you, and you believed her, just like that, huh?

Just like that. He trusts me, Major.

Well, he must.

What were you two talking about back there?

Oh, I'm glad you reminded me.

Um... in there.

McCullough, you didn't answer my question.

I personally guaranteed that her husband would remain with her

as long as she was traveling on the train

if she admitted that she stabbed herself.

You see, Olga here, she couldn't have done it

because she was with her bodyguard all the time.

And Foster, he didn't have the courage,

so she was the only one left.

Alex... you came back to me.

Oh, Alex, take care of that eye, huh?

Yes, I will.

Thank you.

Isn't love wonderful?

Well, I guess I'd better dust off my city duds

and get out the Bible and have a little wedding, huh?

You mean between us?

There's nobody else around here that's single. Those two are married.

Well, marriage is impossible. Why?

I haven't been a very good countess, Major,

traveling around the world all the time,

but I shall try to be from now on.

Colonel Ygors told me so many things about my country

that I didn't even know about.

Some of the things may be justified.

I shall have to go back and see it through

the best way I can.

Well, I figured I'd have you two married

before we got another mile west.

You're not even engaged!

No, but I guarantee you, Major,

by the time we get to Sacramento,

we're going to be the best of friends.

Ah!

Just look at that! Just look at that!

I done won myself $200!

What are you, a poker-playing marshal?

'Course not.

Won it at the telegraph office.

Had myself a bet with old Tuss Birdie.

He's the operator.

I knew that that wire would come in,

and I told him so, and it did!

Knew what?

We just bought Alaska!

The Senate just ratified it this morning.

I got another bet with ol' Tuss too.

On this here same telegram,

Secretary of State says that he's figured on

annexing them there Hawaiian Islands too.

Hawaii?

Yeah, that's the way you say it.

I'm putting my money on old Willie Seward.

Willie Seward!

What does he think we're gonna do

with an overgrown bunch of volcanoes

out in the middle of an ocean?

Makes about as much sense as buying Alaska.

Well, if we're not gonna have a wedding,

we might as well get back to the train.

Come on!