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Oh hello.

Hi.

The maintenance lady?

Yes.

Fantastic. Do come in.

Yes.

I had a problem with my washing machine.

I'm afraid the spin cycle is just not working.

Yeah, of course.

We need to start the lead way for the new piece.

It's a piece for me to drag you out.

Just this way, if you would.

I was just sitting up here, you see, like this.

Just about to get to the spin cycle, you know what I mean?

Yeah.

It just would not work. It just wouldn't do it's job. You know, like pressing all the buttons, just nothing.

Okay.

Is that a problem you've seen before?

Not quite like this, I can't say. No.

You start it off with these things, to be honest.

Do you think it's me? Have I broken it?

I mean, I can check it out. It could be a number of things. Right, so we have to have a look first.

Thank you so much.

Yeah.

Oh, okay.

Yeah, normally I sit about here on the corner and just

So you usually sit there?

Yeah, exactly here on the corner.

Okay, and then usually this moves

Yes, exactly.

I should invest in something else.

Oh, let's have a look.

Oh, yes.

So usually when you sit on it, just so I have a full understanding of what's going on.

Yes, so normally the vibrations come through the work top and just hit me right on the clit just there.

And I just keep going like that for about 40 minutes.

But you stay like that? You don't lean back at all?

Well, maybe sometimes. It's hard to know. Maybe there is a bit of that happening.

Oh, OK.

Is that what's doing it?

Is that what's doing it?

I see.

You're the professional.

You're the professional.

Yeah.

OK.

Okay.

You see the problem?

I don't think I see any problems yet but if I'm working all the time anyway.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah. That's very pleasant.

Yeah, that's very pleasant.

Oh, yes, that works.

Oh yes, that works.

Oh, that certainly does, yes.

That certainly does, yes.

Okay.

The good news is that this is much less problematic for your washing machine warranty.

The good news is that this is much less problematic for your washing machine warranty.

Oh, OK.

Oh, is that right?

Yeah.

Oh, that is good to hear.

Thank you.

Yeah, of course.

Anything you can suggest or recommend is really appreciated.

I'm glad you like it.

Anything at all.

Thinking about the stuff that I brought with me.

Yes.

I'll just keep doing that.

Honestly, that totally works for me.

Thank you.

I don't know, do you normally have this kind of problem to deal with?

Morning housewives and that sort of thing?

I can't say that I do that often.

You're very good, shall I say. Maybe it's just your personal life.

You're very good at it.

Yeah, I think probably in my personal life I've picked up some transferable skills from plumbing.

Now I can totally see that.

I'm not sure.

I might even have some transferable tools, you know.

Is that right?

Yeah, I've got this new plunger.

Okay, plunger? For me?

Well, not the bit that you think of as the plunger bit, I think.

I'm intrigued, I must say.

Although we might just get there with just that.

I think my job's easy.

Oh, that's good.

Oh, yes.

What's your name?

Keiki.

Oh, yes.

Oh my god. Oh my god.

Oh my god.

You are way too good.

I swear to God, that was amazing.

Yeah?

Yes.

Thank you so much.

You're very welcome.

Oh my god.

You still got 20 minutes or so of my time on this call out.

Oh my goodness.

I'm going to make you do something that'll be helpful.

Is there any other plumbing issues you need fixed?

Well, actually now you've said that, there are a couple.

Oh, okay.

Yes, I could take you through.

Yes.

Certainly this region here, I do often find

if I apply suction to this region, it does seem to make it all much more sensitive.

Okay.

I don't know if you have any tools that might help with that perhaps.

The plunger's probably a little bit too intense for that but maybe I could try this.

Oh my god.

Oh, yes. That works.

Oh, my God.

Oh, that's very pleasant.

Oh, my God.

Oh, I'm not being too demanding.

No, not at all.

Oh, my.

Perhaps you want to move somewhere more comfortable so we don't break this machine?

I think that's a really good idea. I didn't like to mention it.

Yeah, it's a little tight.

I'll get the vegetables.

You're very kind.

Let's go.

Bring your equipment.

Yeah, I'll be driving.

Thank you so much.

Just this way, please.

Oh, yes.

All right.

So working?

Oh, very much so. Yes.

Excellent working order under your expert hands.

As long as it keeps working with your garments, all I worry about is that.

Hey, just in case, go grab a tool and make sure everything's in working order, all right?

Okay, tool?

Yeah, a tool.

Okay.

I trust you.

Oh my goodness. Don't worry, it's not what you think it is.

I'm just going to take this off real quick.

You're looking so anxious.

Trust me.

This is all part of your normal planning, yes?

Yeah, absolutely. I always bring at least a couple. You never mind without them.

I suppose. Safety first.

This, a hard hat, your vest.

Condoms.

Condoms, of course.

And this is the best thing ever.

I can't say I use this end of the corner as much.

Oh, yes.

Do you think perhaps those fabulous cargo pants could be of use as well? Like, explore your plumbing? Just a thought.

I usually wouldn't let a non-professional mess around with plumbing, but in this particular case

I mean, I do need to practice with it, really.

Yeah. - Be very cautious. - Yes. First of course.

I'm quite curious.

I can't say I've got anything as nice as you have on me.

I hope that's alright.

You're a working girl.

I love it.

Can you have these off too?

No.

I don't think my friends know.

It's all about the family.

Yeah, of course. It's all about the fun.

Oh, wow.

Gorgeous.

Is this the kind of state your plumbing's always in?

It's a little bit, I think.

I can see a little leakage occurring.

We can fix that one.

Maybe.

Stop.

Just bridge the gap there perhaps? Stick something in the hole?

It's the simplest solution.

Totally works.

I'm sure that's helping with the leakage.

It's fun. It's like something that isn't mine.

Tons too?

Tongue and fingers.

Wetness contained.

Yes, yes, yes, yes.

Yes, yes, yes.

Just there, I think.

That's where it needs the attention, isn't it?

Yeah, I think that's the right spot.

That nasty dampness.

I do wonder about any plumbing tool on your plumbing wall.

How about that?

Safety first, of course.

Can you get those pipes nice and ready for me?

Let's see what we can do.

Maybe this one?

Oh, that's a fun idea.

Okay. Just so you can see.

That's a good thought.

It's very short.

Yeah, we're not using a torch. It's important.

Absolutely. Make sure everything's in order.

Ready?

I think that's pretty much it.

Yeah.

Okay.

It's a lot tighter and neater than mine.

No, that's true.

Let's see.

Maybe lick it a little.

I thought that could be arranged.

Yeah, that's good.

What a nice view.

Ready?

Oh, I think we're getting there.

Oh yes.

Oh yes, that's doing a good job, isn't it?

I think your plan is working.

Oh, yes. This is working.

Excellent.

Excellent. Right up here.

It's rubbing against my tit-tooth.

You get teasing against chocolate.

You're doing good.

Yeah.

Just like that.

That's good.

Oh, I do like that.

Oh, my God.

Just like that.

Yeah, yeah.

You caught me back up.

Hey, hey, hey.

Is that a lemon?

Oh, thank you.

I think it's a lemon.

That was unexpected.

I was called a plumber.

Even if I didn't eat a bushy machine.

Well, I suppose I just need your advice.

Yeah, of course.

Can I have your card?

Oh, card please.

Oh, thanks. How much do you charge?

What is it?

We have gone two minutes over actually.

What?

So I have to charge up the hour.

You're joking.

But I spent that two minutes making you come.

You know, fingering you.

Come on, you can let me off.

You can let me off. Was it 170 pound an hour?

You can't.

I'm not independent. I don't set the rates.

Oh, be reasonable. Come on.

Pretend it's traffic.

There's a tracker on my van. I can't.

But this is ridiculous. I just made you cum.

I just made you come. I think something must be done about it.

I'm not paying an extra 170 pounds for just to make you cum. That's insane.

I don't disagree with you, but by the time I actually got into your flat

up the stairs, through the various budget system

For heaven's sake. Is this what you do to every horny housewife you meet?

You know, I thought we were having a nice time and I feel a bit betrayed, honestly.

I bought a new flight trip for you.

Did you really? Isn't that thoughtful?

I'll tell you what, if you're insisting on charging me for that extra hour, I'm going to make use of it.

Yeah, yeah, I'm sure you will. Do you have a sink leak?

Not a sink leak. I intend to use your tools on you in a way you will not enjoy.

Get on my bed.

On your bed?

Spread your legs. Bend over.

Very nice indeed. Now, is this what you do?

People who don't want to pay your bills?

It's not acceptable.

I can see a few stripes. So clearly you have been trying this little trick before.

And you've been caught. What happened to you?

You're not the first housewife, okay?

Okay, now I hear the truth.

Nice little sideline. Satisfying horny housewife with your plunger.

I still think you're getting a great rate, to be quite honest.

Do you really? You think you're worth that?

It was barely even 20 minutes, frankly. You're just having me on.

It was fun, but it was not worth that much. Trust me.

Spread those legs for me.

See? You're still soaking wet. And you have the cheek to charge me. Unbelievable.

I'm cumming.

She's naughty.

We can get the best of her then.

We can probably work at a discount.

Oh, discount is it now?

Oh, OK.

I'm sorry.

I'm very glad to hear it. And I will make you sorry.

What is that?

A beautiful little hair brush.

I think this will teach you a valuable lesson about customer service.

Satisfaction.

Hey.

Is that worse than my ruler?

Oh, they're both bad. Good.

I'll give you six with this, I think.

Next time, we will just agree a rate up front and I will pay you.

Well, so it's my win.

Excellent. If you wouldn't mind.

And this isn't going any further either, is it?

Right, that's right.

I don't want all the tradesmen knowing I'm a sucker.

Pass me that plunger, Kinky.

Oh, that's where is it gonna go?

Thank you. Nowhere sexy this time.

I do wonder if it could be used for less pleasant purposes.

Oh, no, no, no, no. It's like a baseball bat.

It is a bit, isn't it? Let's see.

I feel like one too.

Good.

About that extra charge

Yeah, forget about it.

That's satisfying to hear.

So the track is malfunctioning.

The track is malfunctioning?

It's always going wrong.

Yeah, exactly.

You don't even wanna stay here the entire hour, do you?

No, I think I have to get going to the next call.

I see.

I think not quite yet.

Few lessons must still be learned.

What on earth were you planning to do with this, beastie? Is this for cleaning out pipes?

Yeah, the non-human ones.

The non-human ones, I see. But you said all my pipes were in fine working order.

That's right.

Where as yours? Unnasty, dishonest.

I thought you were printing anything more sexy.

Hm?

Oh no, please. No, no, no.

You've got a tickly box on you, haven't you?

Yeah.

What does that feel?

It is tickly.

You like the tickling with it?

Yes.

That stinks.

Spread your legs for me.

Spread your legs for me.

You think so?

Tickle, tickle.

Is this any way to treat me?

No.

No, very much not.

I didn't have to ram my fingers up you two.

No, you didn't.

It was just a kindness.

I'm paying that much money for a service.

I expected all the attention.

Yeah, you're right.

Ow, ow, ow, ow.

I, I, I

Do we understand each other?

Yes, yes we do.

Good.

I think just half a dozen with my stuff, huh?

Just see how the deal.

You can get back to those extra calls you're so keen on.

Yeah, suddenly to escape to.

Okay. You ready?

Damn it.

I'm a bit delighted to see you back here, but we will agree on the rate first.

Yes, that's right. Yes, definitely.

Your attention to my plumbing was exemplary.

I can certainly make use of your skills again.

But I will not be cheated.

Yes, ma'am.

Thank you.

I shall be registering my objections on checkertrade.com.

You might find you have rather fewer horny housewives calling you up in emergencies.

Including the spanking detail, I might get a few more though.

Possibly true.

You do color beautifully.

And squirt magnificently.

Very well.

I think we are coming up to an hour.

Okay.

You can grab your combat skills.

And get out of my sight.

Thank you very much. I'll leave it to you.

Thank you.

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