Original subtitles

(Inspector) Mr. Hasselhoff, if the murder victim never entered your room,

how came her phone logged into your Wi-Fi?

I really don't know.

Maybe my door lock didn't work at first. I mean...

I'm really bad with technology.

It's a curse.

I was about to get a new key from reception,

but she took mine and she opened the door for me.

She was very helpful that way.

So your theory being...

Andra spent a couple of minutes in front of my room and maybe

her phone logged in automatically.

- She would need a password. - That's just guest name, room number.

She knew that.

She logged into your Wi-Fi with intent.

Outside of your room.

Why?

She stayed logged in for a full five minutes.

Okay.

Well, she could've gone to her room and stay connected to my internet,

couldn't she?

You know what?

I had that tested.

And?

You're right.

It does work that way.

Let's circle back to the bar.

Did she get a phone call? You noticed something like that?

Yeah.

You know anything about that phone call?

- Did she mention anything? - No, she was really secretive about it.

Hey! Yes, I know this is much sooner than I thought, but

opportunity makes the thief! I don't know how. Make an effort!

Why did you go to Lovers Lane. You said you were dead tired.

- She wanted to show me the view. - But you two had just met!

Everything alright?

You keep blinking.

It's the pain Killers, I'm sure they're wearing off.

The phone call was with her

social media manager.

- Maybe that's the killer. - If he was, he buried himself with her.

Kind of hard to do.

No, someone killed both of them, right after your date night with Andra.

To be perfectly frank,

if it weren't for the fact, that you're David Hasselhoff,

I'd pick you for my main suspect.

- What is going on here? - Peach! I didn't know you were coming.

- Please check on him. - I'm fine.

- How's your pain? - I could use some help with that.

This is Detective Comberg. He's interviewing me about that murder.

Detective Comberg, this is my daughter, Tara.

It's a pleasure.

Is my father a suspect?

Person of interest.

Meet Dr. Schneider and Dr. Sims.

They're practitioners of German criminal law and represent

my father in this investigation.

I hope you're not conducting, what these men assure me to be,

a highly illegal interrogation without consent or my father's lawyers present.

While my father will be cooperating fully in this investigation,

he did not consent to be recorded or interviewed

especially under the influence of medication.

Or did you, Dad?

I don't remember.

He is clearly incapacitated and in need of rest.

But if you provide your questions in writing,

I'm sure you'll have your answers at the precinct within the next day or two.

Dr. Schneider and Dr. Sims will gladly exchange contact data and procedure

outside.

Well done on raising that one, Mr. Hasselhoff.

It is a pleasure meeting you.

We will continue this in a more formal manner.

You mean more lawful.

Goodbye!

- What are you doing, Dad? - Come here! Give me a hug.

Don't worry about it. The situation is well under control.

Don't lie to me, Dad.

- You know I can always tell. - No you can't.

I have had formal training.

Formal training?

- What is that supposed to mean? - I can't tell you.

But I can handle every interrogation.

- Even pass a lie detector test. - But why would you even lie to me?

Peach, I could never pull you into a dangerous mission like that.

What mission?

Uh-oh.

I shouldn't have said that.

I will take my secrets to the grave!

Are you done?

I just told you everything, haven't I?

I hope.

I hope there isn't more.

Oh shit.

You should know that I love you...

- Tara, I must not speak. - ...and I'm so proud of you.

You have come so far.

We knew that this could be a lifelong fight.

So, you fell off the wagon. It happens to the best of us!

The only important thing is that you get right back on, okay? Right away.

- Let this be day one! - I didn't fall off the wagon.

I never will. I'm absolutely sober.

Well,

I'm on drugs, but they're pain killers.

Andra Shandra blew herself up in your hotel room during an assassination attempt

and you were recruited into a network of VIP super spies

with the mission to take out an evil oil sheikh?

- Yeah. - Or maybe you're just tired?

Drugged?

Lost in some foreign country, simply stressed out?

This has all been way too much for you.

We need to get you checked out completely.

See where all this is coming from.

I've never been healthier.

Okay.

I believe you.

Maybe it's nothing... physical.

But you're having blackouts!

Maybe it's something with your mind.

Andra Shandra is dead.

That's real.

- I didn't make this shit up. - Her death could've triggered something?

The mind works in mysterious ways, you know?

We will find a good therapist to check you out.

There must be some doctor-patient confidentiality in Germany, right?

Why?

- You think I killed Andra? - No.

Dad! You couldn't hurt a fly.

I just don't want you to get any more entangled in this than you already are.

Doctor says, I could use those crutches starting tomorrow.

Hey!

I need to get back on stage.

I don't know if that's such a great idea right now, Dad.

Peach, if you don't want me to go mental,

you better get me up and out of this fucking room.

(Applause)

(David) Thank you.

Great to see you, David!

You think you can actually do it like this?

Yeah! Well, I can do it like this...

...0r...

...I could do it...

...like this.

(Batur) That's what I'm talking about!

Yes! See folks, that's how it's done.

Not like wimpy Tom Maria, who calls in sick for having a sneeze!

Wooh! Alright, let's go from the top of act two.

Tom Maria's hardly in that. So, whenever you're ready, guys.

Justice is a factual truth.

It's a natural law.

(David) Somewhere on a distant planet, a billion light years from here,

a green six legged family matriarch

is thinking it to be unfair to always get the short end of the orange goo.

She's thinking: "It's not fair to be called a failure for failing once!

Did I not get back up again? Did I not prove myself to the world?

Did I not raise 2000 six legged beautiful children?

Where's my fucking share of it all?!"

Justice will always be a concept in the realm of ideas,

as soon as one organism can think

and feel and compare it's fate to another.

Next you are telling me,

love is a natural law.

Oh, abandon your denials, Rufus.

You think Lester's mother from another planet could've raised 2000...

- What are you doing here? - What?

Why?

- You have to catch a flight. - What flight?

Ebesir.

You're going.

I never said that. I never agreed.

- Do you have a fucking twin? - No.

- There are three billion people sharing... - Sorry, we changed that

into eight billion people.

You have changed Demroy Corban?

If you don't have a fucking twin, then you already agreed to fly today!

We went over the mission plan a hundred times.

You need to leave. Thomas is waiting outside.

Your flight is on Monday.

My flight is Monday.

It's Monday!

(Jasmin) There are eight billion people

sharing this tiny fleck of hope

in this vast universe

and love is our sustenance!

David, your cue!

Where the hell is David?

(Thomas) The sheikh has sent one of his private planes.

I'm not with you. I'm flying commercial.

- I can hear you! - What? Of course!

- David, I need you to focus. - Where am 1?

We are on our way to the airport.

- Are you alright? - Yeah.

I'm great.

I'm just... picturing it.

Putting myself in the moment.

Yeah... that's good.

Our planes arrive in Ebesir roughly at the same time.

You have to delay a little bit, as I'll be taking longer to clear customs.

- We're being followed. - Yeah, that's alright.

The "Other Side"?

Nah, just that cop. Don't worry about it.

You'll have to buy me time.

Go to the restrooms first. Stay in the stall. Wait for my text.

(Knocking on door)

(Man) Mr. Hasselhoff?

I'm coming!

(Thomas) Once we found each other, I'll be following you closely at all times.

- What if you don't get in? - Why would I not get in?

You're a foreign agent.

I mean... Maybe you're on their radar.

There's no reason to think that will happen.

I'm telling you there is.

- How do you know? - I'm just picturing it.

I'll be there!

A driver has been arranged for you and another one for me.

(Thomas) Once you met your driver tell him to pick up

a surprise gift for Feysal.

I have to pick up a surprise gift for Feysal on the way.

(Thomas) Don't worry, if you can't see me. I'll be tracking your phone.

(Thomas) Your contact to the resistance is Abdus.

He'll be waiting at his garage.

I'll be arriving before you.

So the limo driver doesn't see me.

(Thomas) Abdus has confirmed your car was shipped last night.

I'll hide in the trunk and you'll drive the tow truck to the palace.

You don't have to know the way, just follow the limo.

- Won't they search the trunk? - There is a risk.

And you know what? If you were driving KITT,

we bet they really would.

But with KITT on the flatbed of the truck, psychology works in our favour.

(David) You're right.

It'll work.

You'll be entertaining the sheikh.

He's booked a full concert for the evening.

But we'll never get him with hundreds of people there.

You know I love you.

Occupy him for fifteen minutes.

That gives me enough time to get out of the trunk and back to the gate.

You'll bring up your surprise and take Feysal to KITT.

You'll suggest that he drives it, but first

you honor him with Michael Knight as his personal driver for a spin.

Don't let him take the wheel. That's very important.

What if you don't make it to the gate?

There are going to be guards everywhere.

I'll shoot them with my silenced submachine gun,

switch off security there and open the gates.

(Thomas) That's the cue for Abdus and the resistance.

They'll storm the palace grounds.

Abdus promised at least fifty highly skilled men.

You have to be driving at that point!

(Thomas) The rebels will engage hostiles immediately.

There will be firefights.

That's when the guards will try to get Feysal so safety.

But you'll floor it...

They can't shoot at you, or they'll risk hitting the Sheikh.

(Shouting in Arabic)

We've got the bastard! Fall back!

I'll wait in the truck at the first southeast crossing.

You'll drive KITT inside, just like in your show.

We'll get the cargo ready for shipping at Abdus garage.

(Thomas) Before Feysal's regime knows what hit them,

he'll be out of the country.

Cue: the regime collapsing,

people celebrating in the streets, pulling down statues.

- (Man) Mr. Hasselhoff? - I'm coming!

- What do you mean, he's not coming? - It's not an ambiguous expression.

He's not going to be here!

He got turned away at the border.

- We got to come up with a new plan. - Change the plan? The last minute?

- We're all going to die! - No, we're not going to die.

You play Thomas' part.

You get inside the trunk, call your army

and they have to storm the gates without you.

- Me? In the trunk? - Yes.

I can't.

- I have claustrophobia. - Well, I'm not going to lie to you.

That's going to make it harder. But I can't be in the trunk, right?

- No. - So you have to be.

Do you believe that one man can make a difference?

Because I do.

Guess I'll be in the trunk.

Oh shit!

Now what?

This is way too much improvising.

I hate improvising.

I spent my whole life improvising.

You're doing great.

(Abdus) I'm really not. I'm shaking.

They will make me instantly at the gate.

I've got five minutes to live.

But at least I can say I've spent the last five minutes of my life

talking to David Hasselhoff. Not such a bad way to go.

You're not going to die!

- This will work. - Oh, yeah?

Because you're the white protagonist in this scenario?

Shit. There's the gate.

- That was intense. - I's not going to get any easier.

It's 5 pm.

Buy me 15 minutes.

- How are you? - Welcome, Mr. Hasselhoff.

His royal Highness is expecting you.

Keep an eye on it for me, would you?

Would you please follow me?

(Man) The king is ready.

Please.

Your Highness.

It's David Hasselhoff.

Oh, yes.

So you think you can fuck me in Munich and live to tell the tale, huh?

You're on my turf now!

Dude!

I'm joking!

You know I love you.

Munich was just you doing you.

- It's all in good sport. - You almost got me there for a second.

Everything in here was accumulated by me.

I have hunted and shot every animal you see in this room.

I had my father's stuff cleared out when he died.

Old Fuck had no style.

Your Highness.

- Not all of your country looks that rich. - You're not a fucking communist, are you?

I'd have loved to put KITT up here.

Maybe I'll hunt you down,

have you stuffed and put Michael Knight up there instead?

I'm kidding!

Who'd be performing for my troops tonight, huh?

Your royal Highness, I got a little surprise for you.

I can't let you have KITT,

but I brought him with me,

SO you can take a ride with Michael Knight.

Yeah, I know.

People tell me everything.

No surprises when you're a king. Spoiler alert! For life!

Let's go fucking ride that thing!

Ready for a ride, sir?

- Get up, I'll drive. - Sure.

But first let me take you for a spin or two, I mean, come on!

Quite the tale to tell:

The original Michael Knight was your driver

for the original KITT car? I mean, come on!

Would be a great honor for me, sir.

What the heck!

Stay away, you're just slowing us down.

(Screaming and shooting)

Follow me.

(King Feysal) You're on my turf now!

Maybe I'll hunt you down, have you stuffed.

I have to apologize for the interruption.

The forecast wasn't projecting a coup for today.

So, there will be no concert this evening. Maybe tomorrow. We always catch them.

Well, I have to apologise too.

I have to go back to Germany.

- I'm due to be in a play on stage. - I know everything about it.

But before you go...

Have you ever seen this man?

I feel like I should have.

No. Sorry. I can't recall.

- I don't know who that man is. - We know who this man is.

- His life will not be long in this world. - Oh, shit!

Don't tell me things like that, your Highness.

I'm not at all like the characters I play.

I'm not a tough guy.

- All l can say is... - This whole affair

has been deeply humiliating

I'm sorry I was not able to be a good host, Mr. Hasselhoff.

But you will still get your fee.

You know, back when your nephew was still a sponsor for the play,

we builtin a killer surprise for you!

- What was it? - I can't tell you.

Spoiler alert!

But trust me. It would've blown you away.

But you can tell me now,

- since I will not be coming. - Maybe you change your mind.

Look, I'd love to perform for you. We could make it a black tie preview!

- Whenever you're available. - Nah.

Would be an honor for me, sir.

The Germans don't like me very much right now.

Can't imagine that's true.

The Germans never stay mad for long.

Anyway, think about it.

Where are Henry and Thomas?

They won't be coming.

- Why? - I told them not to.

I followed up on everything you told me.

I hired investigators, I spoke to police

and I even got in contact with some of the intelligence services.

The US Ambassador was most helpful.

Big fan, says "Hi".

Everything you were told was a lie.

There is no Network!

There is a much simpler explanation for all of this.

And your co-star, Henry Hibchen, was behind the whole thing from the start.

- He even told you his motive himself: - Mahmud was a close friend of mine.

Revenge for the hideous murder of his future son-in-law!

(Tara) Henry Hubchen convinced Chloe Hayne to do the play,

because he knew that she had a theatre here in Gorlitz,

and that's where the Sheik's nephew is going to University.

(Tara) That fact is mentioned a lot in the press. He also convinced Chloe

to hire David Hasselhoff, because he knew that Feysal was a big fan.

You don't need a network of international super-spies for that information.

It's all over the internet!

You were obviously bait for the sheikh. And Andra here was bait for the nephew.

Again: His obsession can be easily witnessed online.

He comments on every fucking Andra post in

- the creepiest manner. - What about the attempts on my life.

I mean... Andra, and the man she was with,

- and that man from the "Other Side". (Tara) - That man was not following you.

Well, not at first.

When you first saw him, he was actually following Andra.

But then, when he saw you two go to a room together,

he decided to stay on you to get to her.

He was a long-time stalker of Andra's.

His obsession scared her to death!

She posted about her troubles a lot on social media.

It was actually embarrassingly easy to find that guy!

The German authorities really need to take stalking more seriously.

Do you see him up there?

(Tara) And while you were playing James Bond in Ebesir,

that man got himself arrested.

Put your hands where I can see them!

You are under arrest!

He was charged for the murder of Andra and her friend...

He didn't kill Andra.

- He wasn't even there! - Are you sure, though?

Because he confessed! He told the police everything!

Did I record your confession correctly?

You spelled my name wrong, twice.

I will correct that later.

From now on, my name will be tied to the name Andra Shandra forever.

(David) But... there was a box!

And another man,

who wasn't supposed to be there, who hid in the curtains.

He and Andra might have tried to play a prank on you.

What?!

They did the same thing like five years ago

and it's still online.

Hello, my dear Muckis!

But now we all have to be very, very quiet,

because we are now taking Steven to slumberland!

Smile! Cheers!

Andra and her friend drugged a German celebrity

and put a firework in his hotel room.

(Tara) When the firework went off, he obviously woke up and he freaked out!

- Prank! - (Tara) The video was obviously hilarious

to some people, it got 40 million views.

And they tried to do the same thing again.

But this time to a much bigger celebrity.

(Andra) I know this is much sooner than we thought,

but opportunity makes the thief! I'm telling you, today's the day!

Make sure you grab that stuff

- get in there somehow. - I can't believe you're trying

- that same shit again. - How do you know?

What about him?

(Tara) Thomas Gesach has been working as a branch manager

at that supermarket for seven years.

That's a long time to be setting up a mission, that nobody could've known

would ever happened in Gorlitz.

That high rise he took you to on your first meeting?

He made it out like it was some random secure spot.

He lives there.

(Tara) His apartment is in that building.

He took you to his crib, Dad.

URSULA'S STIR FRY COOKING CLASS

But I was just in Ebesir.

On a "Network" mission.

- I saw it play out. - Think about it.

Everything you did, everything that happened...

Was "The Network" needed in the equation?

Does it really need to exist?

I'm telling you, Dad...

There is no "Network"!

Subtitles: digital images, 2022

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