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MUSIC: Ave Maria by Franz Schubert
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00:00:12,240 --> 00:00:13,680
This is nice.
3
00:00:14,840 --> 00:00:16,240
You're telling me.
4
00:00:17,480 --> 00:00:20,440
I don't think I've been this relaxed
since the womb.
5
00:00:20,440 --> 00:00:23,000
But then, that might
have been foetal alcohol syndrome.
6
00:00:23,000 --> 00:00:24,600
SHE LAUGHS
7
00:00:24,600 --> 00:00:26,240
You're very cute.
8
00:00:26,240 --> 00:00:30,080
As in manly cute? Yeah?
As in Chuck Norris cute?
9
00:00:31,960 --> 00:00:36,800
The best thing about you is that
you know how to keep things casual.
10
00:00:36,800 --> 00:00:39,400
It's so refreshing to find a guy
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00:00:39,400 --> 00:00:41,880
who knows he's not
built for relationships.
12
00:00:43,320 --> 00:00:45,600
MOBILE PHONE RINGS
13
00:00:49,960 --> 00:00:52,240
Hello?
14
00:00:52,240 --> 00:00:53,280
What?!
15
00:00:53,280 --> 00:01:00,200
This programme contains some
strong language.
16
00:01:00,200 --> 00:01:01,320
DOOR OPENS
17
00:01:01,320 --> 00:01:03,200
Well? What have you got to
say for yourself?
18
00:01:03,200 --> 00:01:06,480
Sorry? Yeah, you should be. I mean,
cheating in a test is one thing,
19
00:01:06,480 --> 00:01:08,800
but getting caught, that is just
embarrassing.
20
00:01:08,800 --> 00:01:11,320
Well, I didn't actually cheat.
I was pretending.
21
00:01:11,320 --> 00:01:13,120
Pathetically intriguing - I'll bite.
22
00:01:13,120 --> 00:01:16,320
I figured if I got caught cheating,
people might think I'm cool.
23
00:01:16,320 --> 00:01:20,000
People? Well, a person. Willow.
24
00:01:20,000 --> 00:01:22,840
She's in a dance crew! Not a chance,
mate. You're too uptight.
25
00:01:22,840 --> 00:01:25,840
Uptight? I've opened a chess match
using the King's gambit.
26
00:01:25,840 --> 00:01:26,960
Touch the floor.
27
00:01:30,760 --> 00:01:31,960
Full palm.
28
00:01:33,800 --> 00:01:35,760
Now, touch your face.
29
00:01:38,760 --> 00:01:41,720
See. It's no problem. I have to go.
30
00:01:42,920 --> 00:01:44,800
Melodie?
31
00:01:44,800 --> 00:01:47,800
I thought I heard music.
Andy, hi. How've you been?
32
00:01:47,800 --> 00:01:50,360
Been good, yeah.
I've been on the, er...5:2 diet.
33
00:01:50,360 --> 00:01:52,600
I'm surprised you recognised me.
You should try it.
34
00:01:52,600 --> 00:01:55,680
Not that you need to...
You, you look fine.
35
00:01:55,680 --> 00:01:58,800
How've you been?
Yeah, I'm good. Fat, but good.
36
00:01:58,800 --> 00:02:01,640
Yeah. You know about the last
time...
37
00:02:01,640 --> 00:02:04,080
Oh, God, no! Forget about it.
It's all in the past.
38
00:02:04,080 --> 00:02:06,240
I'm sorry I blew my rape
whistle at you.
39
00:02:06,240 --> 00:02:08,760
It was so stupid.
I don't have it any more so...
40
00:02:08,760 --> 00:02:11,480
Oh, really? Yeah, now I just carry a
rape knife.
41
00:02:14,800 --> 00:02:16,640
So...friends?
42
00:02:16,640 --> 00:02:19,480
Yeah... No, I, I don't know. I mean,
how many female friends
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00:02:19,480 --> 00:02:20,880
do you actually have, Andy?
44
00:02:20,880 --> 00:02:22,160
Um...
DOOR OPENS
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00:02:22,160 --> 00:02:23,880
There you are! Oh, Ryan!
46
00:02:23,880 --> 00:02:27,600
This is Andy. Andy, this is Ryan,
my...colleague.
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00:02:27,600 --> 00:02:31,120
Andy is Errol's uncle. Errol's a
great kid. Like a little Stephen
Hawking.
48
00:02:31,120 --> 00:02:33,760
IN AN ELECTRONIC VOICE: It is
his voice.
49
00:02:33,760 --> 00:02:37,280
I like your T-shirt. I'm a massive
Costello fan. Favourite album?
50
00:02:37,280 --> 00:02:40,480
This Year's Model. Favourite
collaboration? Painted From Memory
with...
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00:02:40,480 --> 00:02:41,920
BOTH: ..Burt Bacharach in '98.
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00:02:41,920 --> 00:02:44,320
Maybe I should leave you two
alone together?
DOOR OPENS
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00:02:44,320 --> 00:02:46,080
Oh, hey, Errol. What's up, dude?
54
00:02:46,080 --> 00:02:49,000
Oh, hello Mr Sardson.
Just washed my hands.
55
00:02:49,000 --> 00:02:52,040
Brilliant. Um, well, it was great
meeting you, Andy.
56
00:02:54,880 --> 00:02:58,520
So how long has Ms Thomas been
dating that Ryan clown?
57
00:02:58,520 --> 00:03:01,080
A while. He and Ms Thomas seem good
together.
58
00:03:01,080 --> 00:03:02,440
What's that supposed to mean?
59
00:03:02,440 --> 00:03:04,840
Mr Sardson's a good guy.
He's a great history teacher.
60
00:03:04,840 --> 00:03:06,840
He just seems like good
boyfriend material.
61
00:03:06,840 --> 00:03:09,760
I'm good boyfriend material. You
think 'To Let' signs are hilarious
62
00:03:09,760 --> 00:03:11,600
because they almost spell 'Toilet'.
63
00:03:11,600 --> 00:03:15,080
Well, they do, don't they! What's
the longest relationship you've ever
had?
64
00:03:15,080 --> 00:03:17,800
More of a quality-over-quantity kind
of guy.
65
00:03:17,800 --> 00:03:20,680
What quality is that then?
Commitment-a-phobia?
66
00:03:21,920 --> 00:03:24,360
OK, so coolness is all about the
three S's.
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00:03:24,360 --> 00:03:28,040
Sight, sound and you've got swagger,
right? Let's start with sight.
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00:03:28,040 --> 00:03:29,400
You need to have a cool face.
69
00:03:29,400 --> 00:03:32,400
Like you're sucking on a lemon
but you find it slightly amusing.
70
00:03:34,760 --> 00:03:37,000
I mean, you look like you're
having a stroke.
71
00:03:37,000 --> 00:03:38,680
Fine, we'll move on to sound.
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00:03:38,680 --> 00:03:42,880
A cool voice can pretty much make
anything sound amazing. Observe.
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IN A HUSKY VOICE: I've just had my
boiler fixed.
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00:03:45,680 --> 00:03:49,760
IN A HUSKY VOICE: Did you see that
episode of Countdown last night?
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00:03:49,760 --> 00:03:51,480
OK, last up is swagger.
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00:03:51,480 --> 00:03:54,040
Got to walk like you've got a tiny
little limp from an old
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00:03:54,040 --> 00:03:55,880
shrapnel injury but you don't care.
78
00:03:55,880 --> 00:03:56,920
Go on.
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00:03:58,440 --> 00:03:59,880
I said shrapnel, not cannon ball.
80
00:03:59,880 --> 00:04:02,040
All right, fine
if you can't master the three S's,
81
00:04:02,040 --> 00:04:04,600
you've got one more option.
Buy my way to the top?
82
00:04:04,600 --> 00:04:06,520
Be dangerous.
83
00:04:06,520 --> 00:04:08,640
Stick those in your pocket.
You want me to steal?
84
00:04:08,640 --> 00:04:13,880
No. Stealing is wrong. I want you to
shoplift. Shoplifting is badass.
85
00:04:14,960 --> 00:04:16,080
Put them in your pocket.
86
00:04:19,960 --> 00:04:22,040
Hello?
Are you going to pay for that?
87
00:04:22,040 --> 00:04:23,080
LEG IT!
88
00:04:25,080 --> 00:04:27,120
Em... Keep the change.
89
00:04:27,120 --> 00:04:30,480
What do you think's cooler?
@FeralErrol or @HolyRoly?
90
00:04:30,480 --> 00:04:32,480
How about @Errol69?
91
00:04:32,480 --> 00:04:34,480
I wasn't born in 1969.
92
00:04:34,480 --> 00:04:36,680
Why do you suddenly
care about social networking?
93
00:04:36,680 --> 00:04:38,120
Cos then Willow might notice me.
94
00:04:38,120 --> 00:04:40,760
I mean, at the moment she only talks
to me when I do her homework.
95
00:04:40,760 --> 00:04:43,600
Whoa. Whoa. Back up. Cool people
don't do other people's homework.
96
00:04:43,600 --> 00:04:46,960
Yeah, but she pays me.
And I'm saving up for a microscope.
You know what you need?
97
00:04:46,960 --> 00:04:51,400
An account that gets the whole
school talking. People love
controversy. You mean like who's
been putting
98
00:04:51,400 --> 00:04:55,200
recyclable bottles in the ordinary
rubbish bin? I think it's Spencer
Bennett. No. I mean
99
00:04:55,200 --> 00:04:58,000
who's dating who. Student fights,
faculty romances. The juice.
100
00:04:58,000 --> 00:05:00,360
You mean gossip? I can't do that.
I'll get in trouble.
101
00:05:00,360 --> 00:05:04,000
That's why you're going to have a
pseudonym.
102
00:05:04,000 --> 00:05:05,480
Welcome to...
103
00:05:07,320 --> 00:05:09,320
..TripleTrouble69.
104
00:05:09,320 --> 00:05:11,920
How's being anonymous going to
prove to Willow that I'm cool?
105
00:05:11,920 --> 00:05:14,960
Cos you can't have the big reveal
until you have the superhero
identity.
106
00:05:14,960 --> 00:05:17,680
Nobody gave a toss about Peter
Parker before he was Spider-Man.
107
00:05:17,680 --> 00:05:19,320
I can't do it. It's too risky.
108
00:05:19,320 --> 00:05:20,680
DOOR SLAMS
FOOTSTEPS APPROACH
109
00:05:21,720 --> 00:05:23,160
Hi, Mum. Don't you "Hi, Mum" me.
110
00:05:23,160 --> 00:05:25,240
What were you thinking -
cheating on a test?!
111
00:05:25,240 --> 00:05:28,360
That is so unlike you. You don't
know me. Maybe I'm dangerous.
112
00:05:28,360 --> 00:05:29,680
Maybe I'm Spider-Man.
113
00:05:29,680 --> 00:05:32,600
Spider-Man doesn't throw bread out
two days before the best by date.
114
00:05:32,600 --> 00:05:34,520
Mould is nothing to be trifled with.
115
00:05:34,520 --> 00:05:36,720
But how would other parents
handle this situation?
116
00:05:36,720 --> 00:05:39,600
Send me to my room? Go to your room
now! And no TV!
117
00:05:39,600 --> 00:05:42,200
But what about University
Challenge?! It's the semifinals.
118
00:05:42,200 --> 00:05:45,000
Fine, University Challenge.
But that is it!
119
00:05:46,120 --> 00:05:48,040
Do you think I've got commitment-a-
phobia?
120
00:05:48,040 --> 00:05:51,960
No. You're just shit at
relationships. I'm the only one here
that's in a relationship. What?
121
00:05:51,960 --> 00:05:55,200
With the cougar? I thought it was a
fling. Has she held your hand in
public yet?
122
00:05:55,200 --> 00:05:57,960
What's that got to do with it? I
give it a week. Now, listen to this.
123
00:05:57,960 --> 00:06:02,360
Ben wants me to meet his girlfriend,
Veronica, to "open the channels of
communication for Roly's sake."
124
00:06:02,360 --> 00:06:05,200
Why do I need to communicate with
a complete stranger about my son?
125
00:06:05,200 --> 00:06:08,760
She didn't squeeze him out of her
vagina? She didn't breast feed him
for three years.
126
00:06:08,760 --> 00:06:10,200
What would you say to a client?
127
00:06:10,200 --> 00:06:13,120
I would say, "Go into the situation
with an open mind
128
00:06:13,120 --> 00:06:15,160
"and leave your baggage with
Ben at the door."
129
00:06:15,160 --> 00:06:16,400
Sounds good.
130
00:06:16,400 --> 00:06:19,360
Fuck that. I'm going to sit there
quietly and judge the bitch.
131
00:06:19,360 --> 00:06:22,120
Hang on, Errol was breast-fed
till he was three?
132
00:06:23,840 --> 00:06:27,320
You better finish that -
you're going to need your strength.
133
00:06:27,320 --> 00:06:31,360
What if we don't tonight? You know,
we could just talk.
134
00:06:31,360 --> 00:06:35,320
Seriously, eat it up. I need you out
the house by 10.30. I have an early
start.
135
00:06:35,320 --> 00:06:38,640
Don't you get lonely, in that big
house all by yourself?
136
00:06:38,640 --> 00:06:42,520
I have plenty of friends to keep me
company - in the short term.
137
00:06:42,520 --> 00:06:46,880
Just curious, what qualities are you
looking for in the long term?
138
00:06:46,880 --> 00:06:50,640
Well, a good listener.
Funny without trying too hard.
139
00:06:50,640 --> 00:06:53,440
Great taste in music,
but not afraid of the cheesy stuff.
140
00:06:53,440 --> 00:06:56,160
Like, he could listen to Wet Wet Wet
without being cynical.
141
00:06:56,160 --> 00:07:00,480
He's loyal, caring, well-read -
and a good role model for kids.
142
00:07:00,480 --> 00:07:03,640
And independently wealthy.
143
00:07:03,640 --> 00:07:04,920
SHE CHUCKLES
144
00:07:06,320 --> 00:07:08,440
What are you doing? Paying?
145
00:07:08,440 --> 00:07:12,160
Don't be silly.
It's not like this was a date.
146
00:07:26,400 --> 00:07:30,200
Tiffany, do you think I'm cool?
147
00:07:30,200 --> 00:07:31,840
Yes.
148
00:07:31,840 --> 00:07:33,360
Really? No.
149
00:07:40,080 --> 00:07:42,160
IN A HUSKY VOICE: Er... Hi, Willow.
150
00:07:42,160 --> 00:07:43,520
What's up with your voice?
151
00:07:43,520 --> 00:07:45,480
It's just a cold. How's it hanging?
152
00:07:45,480 --> 00:07:47,520
All good, little man.
Have you got the homework?
153
00:07:47,520 --> 00:07:50,120
Sure do, yeah, er...a big man.
154
00:07:50,120 --> 00:07:53,800
I added a few extra misspellings
to account for your dyslexia.
155
00:07:53,800 --> 00:07:55,640
How do you know I'm dyslexic?
Your tweets.
156
00:07:55,640 --> 00:07:57,160
Oh, you'll like this joke.
157
00:07:57,160 --> 00:07:59,200
What do dyslexic zombies eat? What?
158
00:07:59,200 --> 00:08:00,720
Brians!
159
00:08:00,720 --> 00:08:02,760
Um... Yeah, anyway, um...
160
00:08:02,760 --> 00:08:06,560
I just came to say that my homework
services will be coming to an end,
161
00:08:06,560 --> 00:08:10,200
unfortunately, but um...we can still
hang on Twitter.
162
00:08:10,200 --> 00:08:13,240
My handle's @TheFeralErrol.
163
00:08:13,240 --> 00:08:14,800
Don't worry, I won't bite.
164
00:08:14,800 --> 00:08:18,480
Tammy just tweeted that Mr Isles is
so old he shits fossils!
165
00:08:19,600 --> 00:08:21,200
Tammy is jokes!
166
00:08:21,200 --> 00:08:24,640
Yeah, he's so old that his farts
are made of background radiation.
167
00:08:24,640 --> 00:08:28,280
So when he makes a big bang,
it's actually from the Big Bang.
168
00:08:28,280 --> 00:08:29,560
HE GIGGLES
169
00:08:32,600 --> 00:08:34,120
Samantha?
170
00:08:34,120 --> 00:08:35,960
(Don't let her win.
Don't let her win.)
171
00:08:35,960 --> 00:08:39,080
Hi, I'm Veronica.
It's so good to meet you.
172
00:08:39,080 --> 00:08:40,880
Please, sit down.
173
00:08:40,880 --> 00:08:43,840
Do you prefer if I call you Sam
or Samantha?
174
00:08:43,840 --> 00:08:45,320
Samantha's good.
175
00:08:45,320 --> 00:08:46,600
I love your top.
176
00:08:46,600 --> 00:08:48,400
Oh, thanks. Primarni sale.
177
00:08:48,400 --> 00:08:51,280
I love them! They're SO cheap.
178
00:08:51,280 --> 00:08:52,600
VERONICA CHUCKLES
179
00:08:52,600 --> 00:08:55,000
Oh, God - I don't mean that YOU'RE
cheap.
180
00:08:55,000 --> 00:08:57,160
I mean, I get all my socks
from the Pound Store
181
00:08:57,160 --> 00:08:58,840
so I'm in no position to judge.
182
00:08:58,840 --> 00:09:02,240
It's fine. I like my clothes like I
like my men - slightly damaged.
183
00:09:05,280 --> 00:09:08,240
Ben said you were funny.
And you're a therapist, right?
184
00:09:08,240 --> 00:09:10,000
That must be so interesting.
185
00:09:10,000 --> 00:09:14,000
Yeah, I love crazy people.
That's why I married Ben!
186
00:09:14,000 --> 00:09:17,880
Look, if my ex asked me
to meet his girlfriend,
187
00:09:17,880 --> 00:09:20,360
I don't think I'd be cool with it.
188
00:09:20,360 --> 00:09:22,600
But I just wanted to tell you
that I'm not here to
189
00:09:22,600 --> 00:09:26,480
step on your authority or try
and get Roly to call me Mum.
190
00:09:26,480 --> 00:09:29,600
I mean, you've done such a great job
with him, you don't need my help.
191
00:09:29,600 --> 00:09:32,360
And we don't even have to be
friends, if you don't want.
192
00:09:32,360 --> 00:09:34,400
Also if you do, that's fine too.
193
00:09:34,400 --> 00:09:35,880
But I just...
194
00:09:35,880 --> 00:09:40,920
just wanted to say hi, really.
So - hi.
195
00:09:40,920 --> 00:09:43,520
How was that? I think
I did better in the mirror.
196
00:09:43,520 --> 00:09:44,960
Oh, thank God, you're normal.
197
00:09:44,960 --> 00:09:46,440
Are you ladies ready to order?
198
00:09:46,440 --> 00:09:48,880
What would you like, Samantha?
It's on me.
199
00:09:48,880 --> 00:09:50,720
Oh, please, call me Sam.
200
00:10:00,960 --> 00:10:02,560
MOBILE PHONE RINGS
201
00:10:04,000 --> 00:10:06,160
Whatever it is, the answer's no.
'What?'
202
00:10:06,160 --> 00:10:09,200
You're my baby brother, can't I call
you for a casual chat? 'Fine.'
203
00:10:09,200 --> 00:10:11,680
How did your coffee go with
Ben's future ex? 'Great.'
204
00:10:11,680 --> 00:10:15,320
I've invited them both to a party at
mine tomorrow. Why would you do
that?
205
00:10:15,320 --> 00:10:17,320
Because Ben asked me to meet her
so I would fail.
206
00:10:17,320 --> 00:10:19,240
But now, I'll be his worst
207
00:10:19,240 --> 00:10:21,640
'nightmare. I am going to become
Veronica's'
208
00:10:21,640 --> 00:10:24,680
best friend. I win. So you'll be
coming to my party tomorrow?
209
00:10:24,680 --> 00:10:26,840
I knew it! No way. 'Oh, come on!'
210
00:10:26,840 --> 00:10:29,080
I need as many people as possible or
I won't look cool.
211
00:10:29,080 --> 00:10:30,880
'You can bring your cougar...'
LINE BEEPS
212
00:10:30,880 --> 00:10:33,040
Other call. I've got to go.
213
00:10:33,040 --> 00:10:34,320
Hey, sexy.
214
00:10:34,320 --> 00:10:35,680
Er... Uncle Andy?
215
00:10:35,680 --> 00:10:37,440
Oh, God, hello.
216
00:10:37,440 --> 00:10:38,560
'What do you want?'
217
00:10:38,560 --> 00:10:41,480
I just tweeted, "Why are the cubes
in men's urinals always blue?
218
00:10:41,480 --> 00:10:42,840
"Hashtag sexist?"
219
00:10:42,840 --> 00:10:44,680
'And that is funny. Not to mention'
220
00:10:44,680 --> 00:10:47,360
a biting social commentary.
But it got zero retweets!
221
00:10:47,360 --> 00:10:48,560
'Even Murray Thomas gets'
222
00:10:48,560 --> 00:10:51,400
a couple of favourites when he posts
clips of his blind cat farting.
223
00:10:51,400 --> 00:10:54,920
Nobody likes you. What's your point?
I'm ready to be Spider-Man.
224
00:11:18,600 --> 00:11:22,120
Do you think it's true? About Mr
Sardson cheating on Ms Thomas?
225
00:11:23,240 --> 00:11:24,760
Don't know. Who cares?
226
00:11:24,760 --> 00:11:28,200
Everyone's talking about it.
Who do you think TripleTrouble69 is?
227
00:11:28,200 --> 00:11:30,440
I think it's Spencer Bennett.
228
00:11:30,440 --> 00:11:34,240
Well, I don't know. I think maybe
this chap might be even cooler than
Spencer.
229
00:11:34,240 --> 00:11:35,720
Or dumber.
230
00:11:35,720 --> 00:11:37,520
Look, excuse me.
231
00:11:37,520 --> 00:11:40,600
Hi, Willow. What do you think of
that um...TripleTrouble guy?
232
00:11:40,600 --> 00:11:41,840
Crazy stuff, right?
233
00:11:41,840 --> 00:11:44,320
Yeah. Whoever wrote all that
shiz is a ledge.
234
00:11:44,320 --> 00:11:46,560
Yes, he's definitely a 'ledge'...
235
00:11:47,680 --> 00:11:51,040
Hey, why do you sit with that
Tiffany girl?
236
00:11:51,040 --> 00:11:53,680
Ain't she a bit...weird?
237
00:11:53,680 --> 00:11:55,840
Oh, here we go.
238
00:11:55,840 --> 00:11:58,800
THEY CHANT
239
00:12:08,640 --> 00:12:11,760
I could have waited in the car
if you're just coming up for a book.
240
00:12:11,760 --> 00:12:13,720
Is this a party?
241
00:12:13,720 --> 00:12:16,520
Oh, yeah. I guess it is.
242
00:12:16,520 --> 00:12:17,880
This'll only take a sec.
243
00:12:17,880 --> 00:12:20,400
Ah, I miss living here.
244
00:12:20,400 --> 00:12:24,120
You lived here? Just loaning it to
my sister and her kid until they get
back on their feet.
245
00:12:24,120 --> 00:12:26,120
If I'm honest,
it was more space than I needed.
246
00:12:26,120 --> 00:12:29,320
And how exactly does an ex-Carpet
Brothers employee afford two flats?
247
00:12:29,320 --> 00:12:31,560
Well, I found a toe in a kebab I had
a couple of years ago
248
00:12:31,560 --> 00:12:35,000
and I poured all the settlement
money into property. And as for
Carpet Brothers,
249
00:12:35,000 --> 00:12:38,520
I was only working that day cos
I was helping out a mate. How didn't
I know any of this?
250
00:12:38,520 --> 00:12:40,440
You never asked. There you are!
251
00:12:40,440 --> 00:12:42,640
Hi, Sam. Teresa, this is Sam,
my sister.
252
00:12:42,640 --> 00:12:45,040
It's a pleasure to meet you.
This place is great.
253
00:12:45,040 --> 00:12:47,160
I'm sure that's not how
Andy left it.
254
00:12:47,160 --> 00:12:48,960
Er... Yeah, no, no.
255
00:12:48,960 --> 00:12:50,880
We had to get the old
makeover police in.
256
00:12:50,880 --> 00:12:52,320
Do you mind if I use your loo?
257
00:12:52,320 --> 00:12:55,400
Yeah, sure, it's just there.
Thank you.
258
00:12:55,400 --> 00:12:58,160
Phwoar. Fuck me. She's classy.
Good luck keeping that one.
259
00:12:58,160 --> 00:13:00,760
Yeah, just make me look like
boyfriend material for tonight.
260
00:13:00,760 --> 00:13:02,840
Who are these jokers?
I went through my Facebook
261
00:13:02,840 --> 00:13:05,560
and I invited all the coolest people
I know to impress Veronica.
262
00:13:05,560 --> 00:13:07,480
How did you make the cut?
SHE GIGGLES
263
00:13:07,480 --> 00:13:08,640
Ow!
264
00:13:08,640 --> 00:13:12,560
KNOCKING ON DOOR
Hey, Rolio Iglesias.
265
00:13:12,560 --> 00:13:17,280
It worked! TripleTrouble69 has 500
followers. And Willow's eating out
of the palm of my hand.
266
00:13:17,280 --> 00:13:20,440
I think I might have caused a fight
between Mr Sardson and Ms Thomas
though.
267
00:13:20,440 --> 00:13:22,400
Should I feel bad about making up
fake gossip?
268
00:13:22,400 --> 00:13:25,320
Nah. Good! Because I'm about to
tweet that Mr Hamish, my gym
teacher,
269
00:13:25,320 --> 00:13:29,320
has been stealing Tampax from the
girls loo. That should teach him for
calling me wheezy.
270
00:13:29,320 --> 00:13:33,280
Nice work. Listen, I've got
my girlfriend here and I need you to
tell her what a great uncle I am.
271
00:13:33,280 --> 00:13:35,160
Sure. I can lie. There you are.
272
00:13:35,160 --> 00:13:38,680
Hey, Teresa!
This is my nephew, Errol.
273
00:13:38,680 --> 00:13:41,440
Hello, nephew Errol. How come you're
not out enjoying the party?
274
00:13:41,440 --> 00:13:44,080
I don't like parties. Tell me,
do you play the lottery, Teresa?
275
00:13:44,080 --> 00:13:47,000
Sometimes, when there's a rollover.
Hmm. Then you'll know the odds
276
00:13:47,000 --> 00:13:48,720
of winning are about
one in 14 million.
277
00:13:48,720 --> 00:13:52,320
The world population is over seven
billion. And Uncle Andy is one in
seven billion.
278
00:13:52,320 --> 00:13:54,480
So that's like winning
the lottery 500 times.
279
00:13:54,480 --> 00:13:56,840
"It could be you."
280
00:13:56,840 --> 00:13:58,840
Thanks for that, Rain Man.
281
00:13:58,840 --> 00:14:01,240
When I grow up, I want to be
just like Uncle Andy. Whoa.
282
00:14:01,240 --> 00:14:02,520
Let's have a listen to this.
283
00:14:02,520 --> 00:14:05,040
I mean, he's loyal, dependable,
great with strangers...
284
00:14:05,040 --> 00:14:07,280
Well, sounds like he'd make
an excellent Labrador.
285
00:14:07,280 --> 00:14:11,400
Well, not to mention funny and
musically talented and free of any
communicable diseases.
286
00:14:11,400 --> 00:14:13,440
ANDY GIGGLES
I can't believe it either.
287
00:14:13,440 --> 00:14:15,760
I wouldn't be alive today
if it weren't for Uncle Andy.
288
00:14:15,760 --> 00:14:18,600
When I took that drugs overdose...
Hey, let's get to the party!
289
00:14:20,680 --> 00:14:22,040
Oh, hi, guys!
290
00:14:22,040 --> 00:14:24,880
Ben, Veronica, this my brother
Andy's new friend, Teresa.
291
00:14:24,880 --> 00:14:27,800
Don't worry, we won't hold
it against you. Nice shirt, Andy.
292
00:14:27,800 --> 00:14:29,600
Does it come with a seizure warning?
293
00:14:29,600 --> 00:14:30,960
THEY LAUGH
294
00:14:30,960 --> 00:14:33,480
What a joker.
Come here for a hug, big guy.
295
00:14:33,480 --> 00:14:34,960
(Just go along with what I say.)
296
00:14:34,960 --> 00:14:38,520
So are you still on for that
round of golf that you promised me?
297
00:14:38,520 --> 00:14:41,080
What? Since when did you like
gol...?
298
00:14:41,080 --> 00:14:43,960
Andy's like Tiger Woods. What, you
mean like he's a sex addict?
299
00:14:43,960 --> 00:14:45,600
THEY LAUGH
300
00:14:45,600 --> 00:14:47,600
I love your dress. Oh, thank you.
301
00:14:47,600 --> 00:14:50,040
It's the only thing from my first
marriage worth keeping.
302
00:14:50,040 --> 00:14:51,440
I didn't know you were divorced?
303
00:14:51,440 --> 00:14:53,920
You never asked. Well, at least your
ex bought you a dress.
304
00:14:53,920 --> 00:14:57,000
For Christmas once,
Ben bought me a screwdriver set.
305
00:14:57,000 --> 00:14:58,640
That was to build Roly's cot with.
306
00:14:58,640 --> 00:15:02,200
Shame on you, Ben.
Making a pregnant woman build a cot.
307
00:15:02,200 --> 00:15:05,800
Oh! I swear, if you don't put
a ring on this one, I will.
308
00:15:05,800 --> 00:15:08,000
VERONICA: Can I get that in writing?
309
00:15:09,200 --> 00:15:13,920
Oh, thank you! It's so great to
finally meet you, Andy.
310
00:15:13,920 --> 00:15:15,560
Ben has told me so many stories.
311
00:15:15,560 --> 00:15:18,640
My favourite is the one when you got
arrested at his stag do
312
00:15:18,640 --> 00:15:21,600
in Barcelona dressed as a condom.
313
00:15:21,600 --> 00:15:23,040
I'm all about family planning.
314
00:15:23,040 --> 00:15:24,560
BEN: So what do you do, Teresa?
315
00:15:24,560 --> 00:15:27,400
Oh, it's really quite boring.
I'm a parliamentary lawyer.
316
00:15:27,400 --> 00:15:28,600
ALL: Oooh...
317
00:15:28,600 --> 00:15:30,080
So cool.
318
00:15:30,080 --> 00:15:31,960
Yeah. Um... I...
319
00:15:31,960 --> 00:15:33,960
I snogged Liam Gallagher once!
320
00:15:33,960 --> 00:15:38,480
Well, I, like, I think
I'm 99.999% sure that it's...
321
00:15:38,480 --> 00:15:40,720
Hey, Rolster. Hi, Roly.
322
00:15:41,800 --> 00:15:44,720
Um... Uncle Andy, I need your help
with a music project.
323
00:15:44,720 --> 00:15:46,320
Life of a role model, eh?
324
00:15:46,320 --> 00:15:48,080
We have a situation.
You're telling me.
325
00:15:48,080 --> 00:15:51,520
Teresa's a divorced parliamentary
lawyer! And I still have a He-Man
duvet cover.
326
00:15:51,520 --> 00:15:55,480
I can't handle this adult shit.
You're having a low self-esteem
attack. You're worth loving.
327
00:15:55,480 --> 00:15:59,440
Just keep telling yourself that.
OK - I'm worth loving, I'm...
Not now! Willow's just PM'd me.
328
00:15:59,440 --> 00:16:03,040
She says, "You're proper jokes.
Who are you? X." She put an X.
329
00:16:03,040 --> 00:16:05,680
I'm never going to wash my screen
again. Do I tell her it's me?
330
00:16:05,680 --> 00:16:09,560
No. Don't write anything. Just play
it cool. How about, "Wouldn't you
like to know, babes?"
331
00:16:09,560 --> 00:16:11,440
Or - "Babycakes?"
That's a bit more urban.
332
00:16:11,440 --> 00:16:13,120
Babycakes isn't urban, it's weird.
333
00:16:13,120 --> 00:16:15,160
Now. What can I do to impress
Teresa?
334
00:16:15,160 --> 00:16:18,000
Well, she's only heard how great
you are from family.
335
00:16:18,000 --> 00:16:20,000
So it might mean more to hear
it from a friend.
336
00:16:20,000 --> 00:16:22,800
What's up, guys? I thought
I heard your voice, Andy.
337
00:16:22,800 --> 00:16:25,680
Is this is where the real party's
at? Whoop! Whoop!
338
00:16:26,960 --> 00:16:29,520
Thanks for inviting us, by the way.
It's very cool of you.
339
00:16:29,520 --> 00:16:32,080
I thought you would flip when
I asked you to meet Veronica.
340
00:16:32,080 --> 00:16:34,680
Why would I flip? She's great.
We're adults.
341
00:16:34,680 --> 00:16:36,360
I don't see why
we can't all be friends.
342
00:16:36,360 --> 00:16:38,760
I'm so glad you said that.
I really wanted your approval.
343
00:16:38,760 --> 00:16:41,520
Especially now we're moving in
together.
344
00:16:41,520 --> 00:16:44,480
Oh, I love Twiglets. You remembered.
345
00:16:46,000 --> 00:16:48,640
We're going. I'm in heat and I can't
take any more small talk.
346
00:16:48,640 --> 00:16:49,800
In a second.
347
00:16:49,800 --> 00:16:53,200
But first, I would like to introduce
you to my old friend, Bruce.
348
00:16:53,200 --> 00:16:54,800
Well, not that old, really.
349
00:16:54,800 --> 00:16:57,080
Bruce is also divorced.
350
00:16:57,080 --> 00:16:58,840
Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.
351
00:16:58,840 --> 00:17:00,840
I'm just glad I could be there for
him.
352
00:17:04,080 --> 00:17:07,880
Oh, yes, I don't know where
I'd be without Andy.
353
00:17:07,880 --> 00:17:12,040
He's my rock. What are friends for?
Everybody needs a shoulder to cry
on.
354
00:17:12,040 --> 00:17:14,080
Yeah, I'm not really
much of a crier.
355
00:17:14,080 --> 00:17:16,520
No, well, he cries like an orphaned
seal pup, so...
356
00:17:16,520 --> 00:17:18,920
Bruce! I'm so glad you could make
it.
357
00:17:18,920 --> 00:17:21,800
There he is! Bruce. I've been
missing you at kids' footy practice.
358
00:17:21,800 --> 00:17:24,040
This is Veronica,
my significant other.
359
00:17:24,040 --> 00:17:26,520
Bruce's step-daughter goes to the
same school as Roly.
360
00:17:26,520 --> 00:17:29,120
Well, ex step-daughter.
Hang in there, mate.
361
00:17:29,120 --> 00:17:30,680
We're still in contact.
362
00:17:30,680 --> 00:17:32,560
Sam. These are for you.
363
00:17:32,560 --> 00:17:36,360
Oh, wow! Chocolate. My favourite.
364
00:17:36,360 --> 00:17:38,240
Well, you'd better share
some of those.
365
00:17:38,240 --> 00:17:40,360
Oh, you'll have to mud wrestle me
for them.
366
00:17:40,360 --> 00:17:42,480
Oh, thank you so much, Bruce,
that's so sweet.
367
00:17:42,480 --> 00:17:45,640
Hello... Your stomach is rock hard.
368
00:17:45,640 --> 00:17:48,160
Have you been working out?
That's just from all the crying.
369
00:17:48,160 --> 00:17:50,360
I guess I naturally have trouble
putting on weight.
370
00:17:50,360 --> 00:17:53,160
Hey, listen, can I get you a drink?
Do you have any cranberry juice?
371
00:17:53,160 --> 00:17:54,720
For you, I've got it all.
372
00:18:45,840 --> 00:18:49,480
And so, I gave them my
shoes and I walked home.
373
00:18:49,480 --> 00:18:52,240
What's so funny about being
mugged at gunpoint for your shoes?
374
00:18:52,240 --> 00:18:54,200
It is the way he told it, sweetie.
375
00:18:54,200 --> 00:18:55,920
Actually, it was pretty funny.
376
00:18:55,920 --> 00:18:59,640
I guess getting divorced really puts
perspective on things.
377
00:18:59,640 --> 00:19:01,600
SAM: Bruce, how's your cranberry?
378
00:19:01,600 --> 00:19:04,880
Er...delicious. Can I try some,
do you mind?
379
00:19:04,880 --> 00:19:07,160
Mmmm... Mmm...
380
00:19:07,160 --> 00:19:09,560
SAM GIGGLES
381
00:19:13,240 --> 00:19:15,360
I'm going to get some more,
wait there.
382
00:19:15,360 --> 00:19:16,800
I'll be right back.
383
00:19:17,840 --> 00:19:20,960
What the fuck is going on with
Bruce? Nothing. I'm just being
friendly.
384
00:19:20,960 --> 00:19:24,280
Even Stevie Wonder can see that
you're cock teasing him. Fine. So
what if I am?
385
00:19:24,280 --> 00:19:28,360
It's nice to get a bit of male
attention. And um...Ben has asked
Veronica to move in with him.
386
00:19:28,360 --> 00:19:31,320
Why do you care? Ben's an arsehole.
Yeah, but he was my arsehole first!
387
00:19:31,320 --> 00:19:34,040
Bruce is a mate. If you're not
serious, don't mess with his head.
388
00:19:34,040 --> 00:19:37,160
You're one to talk. You barely speak
to him and you're making Teresa
think
389
00:19:37,160 --> 00:19:40,920
you stay up all night painting
each other's toenails! We might do.
You don't know. Ggrr!
390
00:19:40,920 --> 00:19:43,720
And despite all his suggested
anti-prostitution bills,
391
00:19:43,720 --> 00:19:46,320
who do you think spends the most on
out-of-town expenses?
392
00:19:46,320 --> 00:19:47,680
THEY CHUCKLE
393
00:19:47,680 --> 00:19:51,240
Well, we should get going before MI5
slap a gag order on me.
394
00:19:51,240 --> 00:19:54,280
Oh, but you just got here. I know,
but I want to get home before my son
does.
395
00:19:54,280 --> 00:19:55,920
BRUCE: Oh, you have a son. How old?
396
00:19:55,920 --> 00:19:58,040
Not quite old enough to move out,
unfortunately.
397
00:19:58,040 --> 00:20:00,960
Andy, will you get my coat?
And don't forget your book.
398
00:20:00,960 --> 00:20:03,120
What book? Is it a colouring book?
399
00:20:03,120 --> 00:20:04,480
HE LAUGHS
400
00:20:04,480 --> 00:20:08,640
No, er... Errol's returning my copy
of War And Peace to me.
401
00:20:08,640 --> 00:20:10,040
I love Russian lit.
402
00:20:10,040 --> 00:20:11,960
Oh, yeah? Who wrote it?
403
00:20:13,840 --> 00:20:16,160
If you don't know that, Ben,
404
00:20:16,160 --> 00:20:17,600
I'm not going to tell you.
405
00:20:18,640 --> 00:20:20,400
She's got an old son.
406
00:20:20,400 --> 00:20:23,520
I can't be with someone that's
got an old son.
407
00:20:23,520 --> 00:20:26,920
Why are you dressed like a bell-end?
I've been exchanging messages with
Willow.
408
00:20:26,920 --> 00:20:29,880
I'll reveal my identity to her on
Skype. I know you told me not to
reply,
409
00:20:29,880 --> 00:20:32,120
but she was just so engaging.
I couldn't help myself.
410
00:20:32,120 --> 00:20:34,280
And they say the brain is
the greatest love organ.
411
00:20:34,280 --> 00:20:36,080
Well, I've never chaffed my brain.
412
00:20:36,080 --> 00:20:38,000
Listen, relationships are messy.
413
00:20:38,000 --> 00:20:40,720
You can't help who you end up with,
whether it's a pint-sized
414
00:20:40,720 --> 00:20:43,160
urban street dancer or
a parliamentary lawyer.
415
00:20:43,160 --> 00:20:46,280
It's all a beautiful mystery.
Like prime numbers.
416
00:20:46,280 --> 00:20:48,840
Now, go out there
and embrace the new you.
417
00:20:48,840 --> 00:20:52,160
The you that isn't afraid of life's
responsibilities but tackles them
418
00:20:52,160 --> 00:20:54,920
head-on like a salmon swimming
upstream for mating season.
419
00:20:54,920 --> 00:20:56,560
Don't salmon die after mating?
420
00:20:56,560 --> 00:20:59,000
Well, it's better than being
eaten by a grizzly bear.
421
00:21:00,880 --> 00:21:03,000
Everyone, can I have your attention?
422
00:21:06,560 --> 00:21:09,480
I've got something
I need to say to you.
423
00:21:09,480 --> 00:21:10,920
This flat isn't mine.
424
00:21:10,920 --> 00:21:13,880
I'm not independently wealthy and
I've never read any Theo Tolstoy.
425
00:21:13,880 --> 00:21:16,280
Leo Tolstoy. I don't care that
you've got an adult son
426
00:21:16,280 --> 00:21:18,480
and I don't care that you've got
a big important job.
427
00:21:18,480 --> 00:21:22,440
I just want you to know that Andy's
ready for a grown-up relationship.
428
00:21:29,760 --> 00:21:33,920
# I feel it in my fingers
429
00:21:33,920 --> 00:21:38,120
# I feel it in my toes
430
00:21:38,120 --> 00:21:41,120
# Love is all around you... #
431
00:21:42,560 --> 00:21:45,160
Thanks. I don't think
I could have survived the chorus.
432
00:21:45,160 --> 00:21:48,040
I'm not an idiot, Andy, I knew
you were lying. I am a lawyer.
433
00:21:48,040 --> 00:21:49,840
Well, then, why didn't you say
something?
434
00:21:49,840 --> 00:21:52,600
It's been a while since anyone's
made the effort and it was sweet.
435
00:21:52,600 --> 00:21:55,040
And, of course, I like when men
humiliate themselves.
436
00:21:55,040 --> 00:21:56,640
Well, you get sexier by the minute.
437
00:21:56,640 --> 00:21:58,680
I'm sorry, Andy. I can't do this.
438
00:21:58,680 --> 00:22:01,280
But you held my hand?
That means something. Yes.
439
00:22:01,280 --> 00:22:03,560
It means I was trying to get you to
leave.
440
00:22:05,360 --> 00:22:08,760
Look. I know we're like chalk and
cheese, but why can't we be
together?
441
00:22:08,760 --> 00:22:09,920
I'm married.
442
00:22:09,920 --> 00:22:11,440
No. You're divorced.
443
00:22:11,440 --> 00:22:14,680
Yes. From my first husband.
I'm still married to my second.
444
00:22:14,680 --> 00:22:16,840
Even if he is away most of the time.
445
00:22:16,840 --> 00:22:18,160
But where's your ring?
446
00:22:24,840 --> 00:22:28,440
Look, I like my life
the way it is. It's tidy.
447
00:22:28,440 --> 00:22:30,520
Nobody gets hurt. Usually.
448
00:22:30,520 --> 00:22:34,360
I want a fling, that's it.
If you're looking for something
more, you need to look elsewhere.
449
00:22:34,360 --> 00:22:37,760
But if you can handle barn-storming
sex with a powerful,
450
00:22:37,760 --> 00:22:39,480
older woman, no strings attached
451
00:22:39,480 --> 00:22:43,840
and the occasional all expenses paid
meal or trip, then...
452
00:22:43,840 --> 00:22:45,120
I'm your gal.
453
00:22:46,120 --> 00:22:47,560
So what's it going to be?
454
00:22:57,760 --> 00:22:58,800
KNOCKING ON DOOR
455
00:22:58,800 --> 00:23:01,480
Sam, you all right? Yeah, yeah.
456
00:23:01,480 --> 00:23:03,600
I just get a little sad whenever
I hear Wet Wet Wet.
457
00:23:03,600 --> 00:23:05,560
God, the '90s sucked!
458
00:23:05,560 --> 00:23:08,160
Are you sure it's nothing
that I've said?
459
00:23:08,160 --> 00:23:10,120
I haven't upset you or...?
460
00:23:10,120 --> 00:23:11,440
How could you upset me?
461
00:23:11,440 --> 00:23:13,880
You're the nicest fucking
person in the world.
462
00:23:13,880 --> 00:23:17,120
I knew it. You do hate me.
463
00:23:17,120 --> 00:23:18,480
No. I don't hate you.
464
00:23:18,480 --> 00:23:23,920
Oh, it's like someone else
wearing your old...bra.
465
00:23:23,920 --> 00:23:28,280
I mean, sure, it had some holes in
it and the wire, like,
466
00:23:28,280 --> 00:23:29,960
dug into your pits,
but it was yours.
467
00:23:29,960 --> 00:23:32,640
And it's really hard to find
a good bra.
468
00:23:32,640 --> 00:23:36,040
I just really wanted you to like me.
469
00:23:36,040 --> 00:23:37,520
I thought we could be friends.
470
00:23:37,520 --> 00:23:40,080
Well, you're dating my ex,
so that's going to be a bit tricky.
471
00:23:40,080 --> 00:23:42,360
But I can see that Ben is
the luckiest man in the world
472
00:23:42,360 --> 00:23:44,480
to have you. Fucking bastard.
473
00:23:46,200 --> 00:23:48,040
Can I ask you something?
474
00:23:48,040 --> 00:23:49,200
Yeah, sure.
475
00:23:49,200 --> 00:23:52,640
You know his left ball, that lump...
476
00:23:52,640 --> 00:23:56,080
Oh, yeah, no, it's always been like
that. Oh, phew.
477
00:23:56,080 --> 00:23:59,160
Um...by the way, Ben told me
the big news.
478
00:23:59,160 --> 00:24:01,600
He did? Hmm.
479
00:24:01,600 --> 00:24:05,240
Oh. I thought we were going to keep
it a secret until the ring was
ready.
480
00:24:05,240 --> 00:24:09,160
What? Yeah, he proposed before
having a ring picked out.
481
00:24:09,160 --> 00:24:11,440
I mean, you know how
impulsive he can be.
482
00:24:14,680 --> 00:24:15,960
Oh, God.
483
00:24:17,000 --> 00:24:19,440
I am SO sorry.
484
00:24:19,440 --> 00:24:21,480
Oh, don't tell him that I told you.
485
00:24:21,480 --> 00:24:23,360
And please don't tell Errol.
Because I know
486
00:24:23,360 --> 00:24:25,880
that he wants to break the news to
him when the time's right.
487
00:24:25,880 --> 00:24:28,520
Oh, God, now you must
definitely hate me. No. No.
488
00:24:28,520 --> 00:24:30,600
No - I'm freaking pumped!
489
00:24:30,600 --> 00:24:32,120
You really mean that?
490
00:24:32,120 --> 00:24:37,600
Definitely. You are going to make
him a very, very happy bra.
491
00:24:37,600 --> 00:24:39,560
So, how is it being back in the
workforce?
492
00:24:39,560 --> 00:24:42,160
All right. A little bit tedious.
Well, you know what they say -
493
00:24:42,160 --> 00:24:44,520
if it was supposed to be fun,
they wouldn't call it work!
494
00:24:45,920 --> 00:24:47,280
Don't fuck Sam.
495
00:24:47,280 --> 00:24:50,320
Are we ready to go? Yup. I think
we're all sorted here.
496
00:24:52,120 --> 00:24:53,880
Bruce? You coming?
497
00:24:53,880 --> 00:24:56,800
Yes. I'm going to go with them.
498
00:24:56,800 --> 00:24:58,120
Oh, all right, OK.
499
00:24:58,120 --> 00:24:59,440
Bye!
500
00:25:01,440 --> 00:25:03,520
RINGING TONE
501
00:25:03,520 --> 00:25:06,400
Uh... Errol?
502
00:25:06,400 --> 00:25:09,440
Yes, Willow. It's me. Now, I know
you're thinking, you must be
thinking,
503
00:25:09,440 --> 00:25:12,840
"How can TripleTrouble69 and Errol
both be the same person, when he's
so cool?"
504
00:25:12,840 --> 00:25:15,600
Well, I'll tell you.
Because, Willow, I am cool.
505
00:25:15,600 --> 00:25:17,600
You just couldn't see it before.
506
00:25:17,600 --> 00:25:20,440
But now that you know my secret,
we can be cool together.
507
00:25:20,440 --> 00:25:22,120
Willow, will you go out with me?
508
00:25:22,120 --> 00:25:25,680
Wow. Errol.
You're a crazy little man.
509
00:25:25,680 --> 00:25:29,120
Respect. But I'm sorry,
I only go with fit dancers.
510
00:25:29,120 --> 00:25:31,960
I can dance. I've got the moves.
511
00:25:31,960 --> 00:25:34,160
Yeah? Let's see 'em.
512
00:25:36,520 --> 00:25:38,840
MUSIC PLAYS
513
00:25:48,640 --> 00:25:52,280
LAUGHTER
514
00:25:53,480 --> 00:25:56,040
This will make a great Vine.
515
00:25:56,040 --> 00:25:58,040
Thanks for the lolz, little man.
516
00:26:01,480 --> 00:26:02,880
Thanks for coming.
517
00:26:46,480 --> 00:26:47,720
Can I sit here?
518
00:26:48,800 --> 00:26:50,200
Do what you like.
519
00:26:54,320 --> 00:26:56,280
Have you seen it? Yep.
520
00:26:56,280 --> 00:26:58,040
How bad is it?
521
00:26:58,040 --> 00:27:00,840
'I am TripleTrouble69.
522
00:27:00,840 --> 00:27:02,840
'I've got the moves.
523
00:27:05,200 --> 00:27:06,720
'We can be cool together.'
524
00:27:08,880 --> 00:27:11,240
Um... Tiff...
525
00:27:11,240 --> 00:27:13,960
I'm sorry that I acted like an
idiot.
526
00:27:13,960 --> 00:27:16,080
You're my best friend. And I...
527
00:27:16,080 --> 00:27:19,000
I swear I'll never blank you again.
528
00:27:19,000 --> 00:27:20,560
OK.
529
00:27:20,560 --> 00:27:22,160
Hey, Errol.
530
00:27:22,160 --> 00:27:25,040
I don't care what anyone says.
I think your dancing was cute.
531
00:27:25,040 --> 00:27:26,320
Thanks, Ruby.
532
00:27:29,560 --> 00:27:31,480
TANNOY: 'Would Errol Meyer report
533
00:27:31,480 --> 00:27:33,840
'to the Head Teacher's office,
immediately?'
534
00:27:33,840 --> 00:27:35,200
ALL: Whoa...
535
00:27:35,200 --> 00:27:37,480
THEY CHANT
536
00:27:42,920 --> 00:27:44,240
So, what's the damage?
537
00:27:44,240 --> 00:27:48,160
Detention for two weeks and an
apology to every teacher and student
I mentioned.
538
00:27:48,160 --> 00:27:51,560
It's not all bad though, um,
Willow and her crew have named
a dance move after me.
539
00:27:51,560 --> 00:27:53,640
The TripleTrouble. It's quite cool,
actually.
540
00:27:53,640 --> 00:27:57,080
Fact is - cool is like herpes.
You've either got it or you haven't.
541
00:27:57,080 --> 00:27:58,320
How's it going with Teresa?
542
00:27:58,320 --> 00:27:59,440
Yeah, great.
543
00:27:59,440 --> 00:28:02,240
She totally gets the fact that I'm
not a relationship kind of guy.
544
00:28:02,240 --> 00:28:05,440
I mean, she begged, sure,
but I stood my ground.
545
00:28:05,440 --> 00:28:08,120
I'm like a lion on the prowl.
Always hunting for my next meal.
546
00:28:08,120 --> 00:28:10,720
You know that the female lion does
most of the hunting, right?
547
00:28:10,720 --> 00:28:11,960
MOBILE PHONE BEEPS
548
00:28:13,840 --> 00:28:16,040
Oh, Uncle Andy. Look what I got.
549
00:28:16,040 --> 00:28:17,840
Nice work, TripleTrouble.
DOOR OPENS
550
00:28:17,840 --> 00:28:19,520
Hey!
551
00:28:19,520 --> 00:28:20,560
LEG IT!
45674
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