Original subtitles

♪ JACKY: White Horses

♪ On white horses let me ride away

♪ To my world of dreams so far away

♪ Let me run

♪ To the sun

♪ To a world my heart can understand

♪ It's a gentle, warm and wonderland

♪ Far away

♪ Stars away

♪ Where the clouds are made of candyfloss

♪ As the day is born

♪ When the stars are gone

♪ We'll race to meet the dawn

♪ So, when I can only see the grey

♪ Of a sad and very lonely day

♪ That's when I

♪ Softly sigh

♪ On white horses, snowy-white horses, let me ride away

Take a step forward.

And another one.

And another.

♪ Where the clouds are made of candyfloss

Now, lift your right leg up. Higher.

What's the matter, Holly? Don't you trust me?

Now, hop.

Hey Nat. Want to try it?

Oh, please. Come on.

Can I put my foot down now?

Marina, very funny. Marina, fucking come back!

♪ Let me ride away

♪ Stars away

♪ Where the clouds are made of candyfloss

Stick your bum out more, Holly.

♪ When the stars are gone

♪ We'll race to meet the dawn

Quick!

♪ So, when I can only see the grey...

What the bloody hell's going on in here?

Get that muck off your face! You look like a clown.

♪ On white horses snowy-white horses

See you later.

Marina...

Sorry, darling. I've got such a bloody migraine.

I'm in exile.

Go in quietly.

Darling, how can you see in this light?

What was your honeymoon like?

What?

Oh...

It's not like it is in books.

Grandma says it's like being their lavatory.

Marina's mother's madly in love with Marina's father.

That woman! She would be.

It's better not to expect too much.

That's why you need to work hard.

What is that on your fingernails?

- Marina wears it. - Well, it looks silly on you.

Some people are pretty people,

and some people are clever people,

which is more important than looks.

- Marina's mother was a croupier. - Oh, for God's sake, darling! I know.

You're a gorgeous girl, darling. Don't eat too many chocs, though.

You're getting porky thighs.

Happiness...

..is a cigar called Hamlet.

It's gorgeous-morgeous! Come on, Holl. Snuggle down.

G&T? Ciggy? Walnut Whip?

Valium?

You're such a skinny twiglet.

Isn't she lucky Marina? Marina's my little piggy.

Go on Mum. Show Holly.

Please.

Oh, all right, then.

Now, girls. Teeth, tits, tummy. Here we go.

Faites vos jeux, messieurs, s'il vous plait.

Rien ne va plus! Your dad lost a wad that first night.

Mum, is Dad not going to live here any more?

Daddy likes to come and go.

He's a free spirit.

Which means we just aren't good enough for him...

apparently.

♪ Watch out, watch out, watch out cos the Humphreys are back!

Harina!

Harina!

Holly and Marina equals Harina. We two are one in Harina.

Harina. Harina. Harina.

Now we'll always be together in Harina.

- Who's the sexiest princess? - Daddy!

I couldn't stay away from my beautiful baby.

Eh?

♪ THE NORMAL: Warm Leatherette

♪ Warm leatherette

♪ Warm

♪ Leatherette

I'm so bored.

I'm so bored, I can hardly speak.

I'm so bored, I could kill myself.

I'm too bored to kill myself.

- Dye your hair Holly. You look like a virgin. - I am a virgin.

But you don't need to broadcast it. Jesus Christ.

Are my legs thinner than yours?

No.

- Yeah, but yours are hairier. - Jews are hairier.

I wish I was Jewish.

I hate being young.

I hate being a virgin.

♪ White riot, I want a riot, white riot, a riot of my own

♪ White riot, I want a riot, white riot, a riot of my own

♪ Black man got a lot of problems...

It's got to reach them on stage. That's better.

Pathetic! We can't even kill ourselves.

We must want to stay alive. God knows why.

I can't believe we haven't even done it yet.

I know. Edie Sedgwick was dead by our age.

Even Ruth Nosbaum's done it.

No! Do you think?

Well...

us and Nosbaum, we're freaks.

- Got a ciggy, girls? - No.

- Baking isn't it? - Just a hot flush, Linda.

Ha-ha-ha.

Why don't you get a bit of sun?

You look like a pair of corpses.

Do you mind? We're trying to revise here.

Right. We've got to make something happen.

I mean, everyone's having a brilliant time, except us.

Even Linda goes to key parties.

- What are key parties? - Christ, Holly, you're so naive.

Nat's coming back tomorrow.

Love is a universal migraine.

Love is a uiversal migraine.

The symptoms of true love are leanness jealousy laggard dawns.

♪ WRECKLESS ERIC: Whole Wide World

NAT: ♪ I'll go the whole wide world just to find her

♪ I'll go the whole wide world

♪ I'll go the whole wide world

♪ To find out where they hide her

WRECKLESS ERIC: ♪ I'll go the whole wide world

♪ I'll go the whole wide world, just to find her

♪ VERDI: Il Trovatore

My favourite. A da.

It's not A da. It's Trovatore.

Really my darling?

Well, all right. If you want to think so.

Don't have a heart attack.

♪ Lovely...A da

May I please leave the table?

- Are you going to do some revision, darling? - No.

Well, what have I said now?

I always seem to have done something.

No, Max, don't eat any more cheese. You're obese and she looks like a Belsen victim.

Aqua Marina,

- the joy of Cortina! - Hello, Mr Rossman. Happy Shabbat thingy.

Happy Shabbat thingy to you, too!

Holl!

- Holl! - Oh!

Hello, Mrs Rossman.

What a fabulous outfit! Aren't you a character?

Mind you, you've got the looks to carry it off.

You make us feel so mousy. Doesn't she, Holly?

Yes, Judith.

Well, I'll leave you two together.

- What? - Nice 'jamas.

Oh, fuck off. What?

- Oh, God, Holly, something is at last happening. - What?

You know Nat's girlfriend, Carolyn? I've told you about her. She's amazing. So street.

Well, she's only having this big party, all weekend, cos her parents are away,

and she knows The Clash!

No?! But a party during the day?

Oh, Holly, don't be such a virgin. With a party, there's no day or night.

It's The Clash!

He's got this book somewhere.

Got it.

There we go. Carolyn Youg 32 Vale of Health, Hampstead.

Our lives are about to start, Holl.

Oh, my God. Listen.

"Oh, Carolyn, Carolyn, you break like a pane of glass.

When you melt, I melt too."

"How to give a clitoral orgasm."

You know brothers wank in their socks, don't you?

"Foreplay can and should last up to two hours."

You'd better watch out Holly.

You might get pregnant by my brother's sock.

Stop it!

You're going to get impregnated by my brother's seed!

Aaaargh!

Oh, stop it! Stop it!

Marina, do you know how many calories there are in salad cream?

See you.

Nat! Natty. Can you give my shoulders a massage?

- We'll be so cred. - My room's free now if you want to snoop.

- I don't want VD. - Going to Carolyn's?

- Yeah. - Make him a sandwich.

- I'm not hungry. - He can have these if he wants.

Lots of yummy garlic.

Very erotic. Carolyn will love that.

Don't start.

Hm. Well, I'll get it, shall I?

- Oh, it's you. - How's my beautiful princess?

- Knocking 'em dead, eh? - Mummy's in the lounge.

lf you remember the way.

Nat! Ciao, mate.

Oh.

Tell your ex-father his fondue set is in that box, and I'm not to talk to him util we're divorced.

"Come in, Ray. Sit down. How are you?"

You've lost weight.

Thanks, darling.

Must be all the shagging. unless you've got cancer.

Well... "Cheers, Ray."

"Good to see you. Happy birthday last week."

Nat! Nat! I'm talking to you.

I asked you: when are you coming back?

I told you. I don't know! - Don't shout at me baby!

Sorry.

Come on.

- Can I get on your back? - OK.

Get a move on, or we'll miss everything.

♪ WRECKLESS ERIC: Whole Wide World

Holly! Not now. You know what you're like. You'll throw up before we get there.

Street, remember.

Up! Do you want to look straight? You'll embarrass Nat.

- God, what if Mick Jones speaks to me? - My God! Mick Jones. Mick Jones!

- One more thing. Come here. - What?

- Lovebites. - No, no, get off.

You've got to look experienced, Holl. Come on.

OK!

Right. Do me. Come on. Do me.

Ow!

You've got to suck, not just bite. Come on. Do it again.

Ready? Right, suck. Suck, suck, suck, suck.

There you go.

- That looks good. - Is that good?

My God, I am going to do absolutely...everything.

Come on, Holly. Hurry up.

Is Nat in?

I need to tell him something.

♪ THE CLASH: (White Man) In Hammersmith Palais

♪ Dillinger and Leroy Smart

♪ Delroy Wilson, cool operator

♪ Ken Boothe for UK pop reggae

♪ With backing-band sound systems

♪ If they've got anything to say...

Jesus. What are you doing here?

- Hi, Nat. Sweet

Yeah, they can play, yeah?

- Do you want to play girls? - Maybe.

Maybe.

- Is this the party? - Shh.

Yeah. Thanks.

So, erm...what are we playing?

Well, bye, children.

Are you going out? - We're not Siamese twins, Nat.

See you later.

I fucked these Siamese twins once. Fucking strange, man, I'm telling you.

- Anyone for tennis? - It's heroin.

I know what it is, for God's sake.

Everything, remember?

No, no. God, Marina, you can't.

Bye, children.

Marina, don't.

♪ THE ONLY ONES: Another Girl, Another Planet

♪ Space travel's in my blood

♪ There ain't nothing I can do about it

♪ Long journeys wear me out

♪ But I know I can't live without it, oh, no

Hello, little Holly.

♪ I think I'm on another world with you

Where are your spikes?

Inside me.

♪ ..with you

♪ I think I'm on another world with you

♪ With you

♪ I'm on another planet with you

♪ With you

♪ Another girl

Oh, that was amazing.

You've got to try living sometime, Holly.

I'm going to be sick again.

Don't worry.

She'll be puking for hours.

You are...

..so beautiful.

Do you know that?

Ow!

I made an altar for you.

- No. - Come on. Don't be scared.

Don't be scared.

Come on.

What's the matter?

Fuck off!

- Blimey. - Sorry.

What happened?

What do you think fucking happened?

Not Craig? Are you all right?

Holly, piss off, all right? Just piss off.

Did you have a nice time fucking my brother?

You know, you really shouldn't bother. He's totally obsessed with Carolyn.

Did you see his face when she left? Huh?

He probably thought that you were her.

You know what it's like when you're stoned.

You just want to have sex with someone. It doesn't matter who it's with.

Well, at least I tried heroin.

I can't describe it. It's great.

- Well, don't fucking bother, then. - You should have tried it, Holl.

Well, I didn't, all right? So, stop going on about it.

Fine.

Did you have a nice time at Marina's?

What did you do?

Nothing much. Just hard drugs and casual sex.

Yes...of course.

Well, er...lunch won't be very long.

Don't bother to knock.

Don't bother to stop crashing my parties.

- Where are you going? - Greece, with Caro.

That bad, then?

- Could you give this to Holly? - What is it?

Nothing. Christmas card.

I said, bye, then.

Take care of yourself, OK?

Dear Holly,

I just wanted to say that what happened last night was beautiful,

though a case of bad timing and who knows what might happen in the future?

Love from your confused and wretched friend, Nat.

If God had meant us to do gardening, why would he have invented Gentiles?

Hello, Mr Rossman. - Oh, here's one. Like to do some weeding?

♪ Aqua Marina, the joy of Cortina!

God, I love your dad.

He's the only nice man I know.

Nat's gone to Greece with Carolyn.

- Did he say anything? - About what?

They're all pigs, Holly.

You've got me. You'll always have me.

Look, I'm sorry, OK?

For what?

I don't know.

Are we still Harina?

Pathetic.

Things'll get better, won't they?

Ah. Smile.

Hang on.

Holly...

♪ ECHO & THE BUNNYMEN: The Cutter

♪ Who's on the seventh floor

♪ Brewing alternatives?

♪ What's in the bottom drawer

♪ Waiting for things to give?

♪ Spare us the cutter

♪ Spare us the cutter

♪ Couldn't cut the

♪ Mustard...

- You look cross. - We've run out of milk.

And?

Shall I run out to the shops for you?

Marina!

Good morning.

What time is it? - Nine. Are you coming, or not?

Oh, give...

Mmm.

It was such a great night last night.

- Yeah, I know. Thank you. - Come on. Tea.

I had a picket line to stand on and a nutter boyfriend to avoid.

- Right, I'm going now. - Are you still seeing him? He's such a wanker.

Come on. You don't even know him.

At least Stuart believes in something. At least he's er...intense and passionate.

He's so un-intense he can hardly stand up.

Oh, Ben's nice. You don't appreciate him.

I want a nice one.

- You got a letter. - Oh, did I?

Oh, it's Nat.

Hair!

- Sorry. Sorry. - You always do that.

"Darling M, Guess what. Big brother's in love."

She's called Isabel. She's French. She's an actress.

We got nettle rash together. She's incredible.

She wears Capri pants and recites Racine in bed.

- What's that? - Racine.

"..Racine in bed."

She heals my wounds.

Now she's gone back to Paris for an audition.

I know you'll love her. She's madder than you!

Anyway, I'll send you a postcard of the Eiffel Tower.

"Love, Nat. PS..."

Hello.

Oh, hi.

PS. Send Holly my love.

Ahh right, then. Yeah. See you later.

Who?

Rob. He works at the union bar.

- He's chubby, but he's quite street - All right. Come on.

Let's go.

Nat sounds happy, doesn't he?

Good.

- I wish something exciting would happen. - Are my eyelashes still on?

"Mon enfant, ma soeur,

songe é la douceur, d'aller lébas,

vivre ensemble.

Aimer é loisir...

aimer, et mourir."

Rimbaud, Baudelaire, Verlaine,

Nothing that a good course of antidepressants couldn't cure.

Or maybe 25 years in psychoanalysis.

"Why should we be subjected

to their mother-fixated outpourings?" you ask.

"We get enough of that from our boyfriends."

Remember, it's just as relevant

to talk about Lou Reed or...Adam Ant in your essay.

Precisely what Barthes was saying in the '50s, and what Baudrillard is saying now.

So, questions?

Yes? The young lady in the green sweater.

Oh. Yes, erm...

Do you think a deconstructive approach to literary criticism

leads to a cooler, less emotional response from the reader?

That's an interesting one. That is the question. What's your name?

Holly Rossman.

Holly, Holly. Very good.

You see, the thing about critical theory that is important...

Holly...Holly Rossman.

Shh.

Socialist Worker!

Holly...

Stuart, not now. We've got to discuss some work with our tutor.

- I'll phone you. - Holly, come on!

Socialist Worker!

I was just kidding about Adam Ant, right? Don't do that to me!

But it is so important to have a visceral reaction to the text.

- But that's so reductive. - Oh, absolutely.

It's not. It's the emotion expressed that matters.

- Do you know Tarkovsky? It's like Tarkovsky. Oh, I love Tarkovsky.

Do you? Oh, he's my favourite director. Tarkovsky and Bergman.

- I'm reading Bergman's autobiography now. - Oh, my God! So am I.

♪ DILLINGER: Cokane In My Brain

Great song.

You know I've got to figure out where to get my drugs.

Erm...I can get you some coke, if you like. No probs.

Do you know Nostalgia? That's my favourite Tarkovsky.

Yes, it would be. She likes brooding.

It's on her CV. "Hobbies: Suffering and brooding." Isn't it, Holl?

I love brooding

- You must be Jewish. - Why?

We'd better go to Semiotics. Holly, are you coming?

- You guys gotta get to class? No.

- Another drink? OK.

- God, what a wanker! - I know.

- He fancies himself so much. - Poseur.

Oh, look. That's your Rob behind the bar.

- Where? - There.

Holly, it's over.

Is it?

Yeah.

Did my voice sound really squeaky?

No, you asked a brilliant question. He loved it.

I always wonder what people like that are really like, underneath all that crap.

And did you see his shoes? Loafers with yellow socks!

Yellow socks! I know.

It's better than a beret, though.

- Wooh! - Oi, fuck off! Holly!

Ben, do you believe in life after death?

Don't you ever want to think about something serious?

No. No, I...just want to be unconscious.

- Ben... - Mm?

Can you...get us some coke, please?

- Coke? - Mm.

- What's wrong with sulphate? - It's for a rich mate.

Oh, yeah? What rich mate?

No-one.

♪ SCRITTI POLITTI: The Sweetest Girl

That is an interesting one, isn't it?

Yes, that is the question. The question to ask.

Holly...Rossman.

♪ The weakest link in every chain

♪ I always want to find it

♪ The strongest words in each belief

♪ Find out what's behind it

♪ The politics is prior to

♪ The vagaries of science

♪ She left because she understood the value of defiance

- Special delivery. - Oh, great.

Perfect. Thanks.

Look, a few of us are going to a club on Saturday. Do you want to come?

- Sure. - Yeah?

We could try some of this, right?

All right. Saturday, then.

Bye.

Holly, this is much better than most undergraduate work.

No...I don't think I articulated it very well.

The bit about desire and metaphor with the integration of...

Do you want to get a cup of coffee?

- Oh, OK. - Great. You got that?

Oh, yeah.

God, I used to pretend I was Catholic. I thought it made me seem more...alluring.

Do you think being Jewish makes you more neurotic?

Not at all.

I was never interested in Jewish girls when I was in school.

I'd go crazy for these... rejecting Br nnnhilde types.

Still do, in fact.

Now, would you say that was neurotic?

Yes!

Erm...

You know, it'd be really helpful if I could...

er...just meet once more to show you a rough draft, before I...

- OK. - ..hand it in.

Er...want to come by for tea on Sunday?

OK. Erm...great.

Thanks.

Er...my bag.

Oh. Er...see you later.

Can you imagine how some people sleep with tutors?

How desperate can you get?

Someone like you would do that.

The thing about blokes is, don't ever be yourself.

You've got to have a gimmick, like "intense and difficult".

You could do that easily.

Oh, thanks!

Shall I come out with you and Ben?

You know, you look a bit peaky, actually.

Do I?

Mm. Why don't you stay in bed? Tuck up with a book? I'll see you later.

All right.

Mm.

♪ ADAM & THE ANTS: Kings Of The Wild Frontier

♪ I feel beneath the white there is a redskin, suffering

♪ From centuries of taming

- Hey... - Oh, Paul!

My flatmate, Paul. This is Daniel, my erm...

Tourist.

Later!

♪ No method in our madness

♪ Yay!

♪ Just pride about our manner

♪ Yay!

Come on. Let's have it, then.

- The coke, Daniel. - Right.

♪ CABARET VOLTAIRE: Nag Nag Nag

♪ Nag, nag, nag

♪ Nag, nag, nag

♪ Nag, nag, nag

♪ Nag, nag, nag

It's the connection of desire to reality that possesses revolutionary force.

Don't you think so, Daniel?

♪ IMAGINATION: Body Talk

♪ Morning, afternoon and night

♪ We're laying together, side by side

♪ Searching for lust, searching for breath

♪ Searching for the touch of life

♪ No words are spoken

♪ The only sound in here is...

Hey. - Mm.

Oh...

Jesus. I'm wrecked.

When I was a child, I used to go in and watch my parents sleeping,

when they were together.

- They're not together any more. - I can't imagine you ever being a child.

You know, Marina...

I'm going to have to be careful.

If this gets out, you could be in a lot of trouble.

I won't tell a soul, I promise.

Clandestine's my favourite word.

All right.

What's your favourite word?

Sleep.

I'm an old man, you know.

- No, you're not. - No?

You weren't an old man last night.

Ah, well, that was last night.

Mmm...OK. Ohh!

- What? - Oh, Jesus. That coke was amazing.

Just need a little sleep.

Just a little bit of sleep.

I'll call you. I'll call you later.

Hi.

"Come back to me in dreams,

that I may give, pulse for pulse,

breath for breath.

Speak low. Lean low.

As long ago, my love. Long ago."

I always loved that stanza when I was young.

Mm. Do you ever feel excluded from Rossetti's mysticism, being Jewish?

Oh, that's right. You wanted to be Catholic, didn't you?

Well...

I think you're very interesting, and very Jewish, and both are possible.

Holly, I don't think this is a good idea.

No. No, I know.

No, I'm sorry. Don't be upset.

Please don't...don't be upset.

No, please, don't... It's OK.

All right.

BEN: Selfish, shallow bitch!

You're about as deep as a fucking coma victim!

You...you're gonna die a vacuous old slut!

And you can keep your crap paintings, cos they're crap!

- It's better than Dynasty. Fuck off!

- Do you think I'm shallow? - Course not.

- Just cos I don't read fucking books. - Doesn't mean you're not soulful.

- Oh, soulful like Holly... - Who mentioned Holly?

..who's sensitive and committed to causes?

She's a really scared person.

And she thinks too much.

I mean, you can't experience things by reading about them in novels.

You know, we've got to really be careful.

I know.

I won't say a word.

That is...if you want to see me again.

Hey...of course I want to see you again.

God, you look so beautiful...

and strange.

I'm so glad you dumped Stuart, Holl.

He was always weird.

Do you feel guilty about Ben?

Erm...yeah, a bit, I suppose.

Maybe you're right.

Maybe we should all have one person.

Like a real soul mate.

Marina?

What?

- Nothing. - You always do that.

No, it's nothing. I'll tell you another time.

Tell me

You're so annoying.

Let's go for tea or a nice long walk.

- Mm? - I thought coke and speed were more your style.

Well, you obviously don't know me very well, do you?

You think I'm shallow, don't you?

My friend, Marina, I've known her since we were ten.

She just never changes or wants me to change.

I used to be so in love with her brother Nat. Talk about romantic projections. Christ!

I'd just melt when he came into the room.

Actually, I probably still am, in that yearning, Proustian way...

Jesus, Holly!

Do you ever stop talking?

Daniel...

Let's do it here. Right now. Hm?

You could just pull up my skirt and throw me down in these muddy leaves...

Holly! Holly!

What...what's the matter?

Nothing. Nothing is the matter. Will you stop asking me what the matter is?

I just...I don't feel like fucking in a crummy, wet wood. That's all.

I'm sorry.

There's a Bergman on at the Duke of York's tonight.

You don't really like that shit, do you?

Erm...sometimes I do, actually.

All right. Which one do you like best?

Er...Wild Strawberries.

That's the one that's on tonight. Which other one do you like, Miss Bergman fan?

- Lots of them. - Mm-hm?

Erm...that one about death.

The black-and-white one.

Oh, fuck off.

Stay.

No. I've got a tutorial.

Marina, have you seen my necklace?

Is that my top you're wearing?

No, it's new.

Why are you looking at me like that?

You've really changed. You know that?

What?

I said, "You've really changed. You know that?"

I'll go, then, shall I?

You'd fucking better.

- Nat! - Surprise.

God!

Er...come in.

Have you left her in Paris?

- Mm. - God, what a bitch!

Well you did the right thing.

Love stinks. Doesn't it Holly?

You just never know with some people. Especially the quiet, mousy, passive ones.

Isabel wasn't at all quiet and mousy.

Poor Nathy.

You can come out with me tonight. I'll look after you.

NAT : Gonna come? - Mm. Yeah.

Daniel, it's Holly. Hi. I'm...

Look, I can't make it tonight.

I just realised how much work I have to catch up on.

Hello, darling.

♪ DEPECHE MODE: Just Can't Get Enough

♪ When I'm with you, baby, I go out of my head

♪ And I just can't get enough, I just can't get enough

♪ All the things you do to me...

- She seems a bit weird tonight. - How can you tell?

♪ I just can't get enough

It's really nice to see you again, Holl.

What?

Really nice to see you again.

Good. Thanks.

I often wondered how you were getting on, you know.

Right. Thanks.

What?

What a bunch of wankers!

Come on. Let's dance.

♪ Every time I think of you, I know we have to meet

♪ And I just can't get enough, I just can't get enough

♪ It's getting hotter, it's our burning love

♪ And I just can't seem to get enough

♪ I just can't get enough, I just can't get enough

♪ I just can't get enough, I just can't get enough

Fuck off!

♪ I just can't get enough

♪ I just can't get enough, I just can't get enough

- Christ, Marina! - She's fucking her tutor, you know.

Holly. Tutor. Fucking.

What are you telling me for?

I just thought I would. Anyway, you two? It would be like incest.

What?

He's so old. She's so into him. It's pathetic.

Oh, it's the coldest house on the planet.

I know.

So, er...where do you want to sleep?

There's Marina's floor, or her bed, until she gets in, or who with.

Or there's a sofa in Sophie's room, but she's in there with some drummer.

Anywhere's fine. Let's finish this first.

Oh, I can't believe how much you've changed.

Is that good?

Yes.

Thanks a lot!

I'm going to get in, too. I can feel TB coming on.

Brrr!

I'll crash in Marina's room when you want to go to sleep.

Oh, I can never get to sleep.

Marina just puts her head down and she's out.

Yeah, I used to stick things up her nose when we were on holiday,

and draw moustaches on her in felt-tip pen. She never used to wake up.

- I had no idea you were such close friends. Bollocks.

Girls were never interested in me before. This is new for me. I don't know what to do.

- All right. I'm an asshole. Is that what you want? - Yeah.

Do you think I enjoy having you come in here at two in the morning, screaming and yelling?

I mean, that's ridiculous. Marina, what we had was sex.

Listen. Fuck off! Just fuck off!

Shall I read you a soothing story?

Crime And Punishment. Perfect.

"Raskolnikov pulled the axe quite out,

swung it with both arms,

and scarcely...scarcely conscious of himself...

..and almost without effort, almost mechanically,

brought the blunt side down on her head.

He seemed not to use his own strength in this.

As soon as he had once brought the axe down,

his strength returned to him."

Hello.

You've still got your hat on.

Hey.

Where are you going?

It feels weird.

Yeah, I know.

Holly...are you seeing someone?

Not Stuart?

No. I was.

Sh-sh-should I not be now?

It's up to you.

Oh.

Do you want me not to be?

Do you want me

to want you not to be?

I think so.

You know I do.

Don't be, then.

Don't be!

Don't be!

Well, I should go and finish it, then.

Mm. Go on, then.

- Go on. - I can't!

Now, promise that you'll call me.

I will.

How did it go? Are you all right?

What happened? What did he say?

He...he...

He was with her.

- Who? - Marina.

They were... He was with her.

What?!

- The fucking bastard! - I didn't...

I can't...I can't believe it. I don't understand why she would do this to me.

Listen. Forget about him. He's obviously a wanker.

No, he's not a wanker. I just...

I just can't believe it!

- She must just hate me. - Shh.

She didn't even want him until I did. I just can't believe it! She always does this to me.

- Oh, God. What if she knows about me? - Oh, who cares?

D-Does she?

What... I mean, did she tell you?

Oh, God, she told you!

Shh.

I can't bear this! I can't bear this.

I can't bear this.

- What about last night, Holl? - No! Just forget it, please.

Forget it!

For fuck's sake!

Hey.

Come in.

Look, you can't feel any worse about this than I do.

I never knew you were such close friends.

With her it was never anything more than just the...

God, you are such an incredible girl.

Woman.

And someday,

you're gonna meet some guy your age. who's really...

If you see her or phone her again, I'm going to the Vice-Chancellor to report you.

How incredible is that?

Where's Nat?

He's gone.

Why? How many men were you thinking of collecting, Holly?

What do you mean?

You know exactly what I mean.

Hello?

What...?

Well, is she all right?

No. Erm...

Let me go and try and catch Nat. I'll be there as soon as I can. All right, bye.

- What? - Mum's taken an overdose. She's in hospital.

Oh, God. Marina...Marina...

♪ NICK DRAKE: Cello Song

♪ Strange face

♪ With your eyes

♪ So pale and sincere

♪ underneath you know well

♪ You have nothing to fear

♪ For the dreams that came

♪ To you when so young

Would you fetch me some ciggies, baby?

♪ Told of a life

♪ Where spring is sprung

Come on!

Come here, sweetheart.

It's all right now, sweetheart.

Ray...

♪ In the cold of the night

♪ When the armies of emotion

♪ Go out to fight...

♪ Remember Christ our Saviour... - Piss off.

Holly.

- This is Meredith. - Hi. It's great meeting all Danny's students.

You've all got such great style.

Not like my bunch at Smith.

- I'd better get going. - Pleasure to meet you. Happy holidays.

Daniel, it's me.

Look, please, speak...

Why don't you go back to Paris?

Go on. Go and kiss and make up. I'll be here when she gets back.

Did you hear from her? From Holly?

Yeah. She phoned the hospital. Why?

- Did she say anything? - About what? Fucking my bloke?

That's all that's in her mind, Nat.

I'll get the ferry.

See you.

Hello. It's only me.

Hi.

- Hello. - Come on. You can't stay here alone.

Oh, darling.

No, we've been dancing to swing music a lot,

and erm...wearing cocktail dresses.

We go to this club called Dick Diver's, like in Scott Fitzgerald.

Oh, The Great Gatsby.

No, darling. Tender Is The Night. What fun! Holly never tells us anything.

That was absolutely delicious, Judith.

Today M and I went to Biba and nicked a lipstick.

M says it's much more in and Harina-ish than Miss Selfridge's.

N looked at me, and I felt red-hot.

Hi.

She'll be all right.

It's all right.

Come on.

Sleep tight.

Don't worry. I'm going.

I'm glad Linda's OK.

- Marina... - Your mum's been great. Thanks.

- Did you tell Nat I wanted to speak to him? - Yes, and he's gone to Paris with Isabel.

Do you know he's married?

Who?

Oh, for God's sake! Marina, can we please just talk about this?

I knew that you liked him at first, but I didn't think you'd do anything about it.

Cos I'm so mousy and boring?

No... Well, yeah, if you say so. Yeah.

Oh, just because I don't shag the entire campus?

- Oh, is Daddy's girl unhappy? - I'm going to bed. Could you get out, please?

You'd better change the sheets. You don't know where I've been.

♪ I call her name

♪ She calls my name

♪ My pain is sweet

Holly?

♪ Yes, my pain is sweet

You can't do that.

♪ Coming

Come on, brooding one.

Holly, don't go over there.

Max, we are not going through the hydrangeas. We are not going through the hydrangeas.

♪ BARBARA DICKSON: January, February

♪ why it is you say you're leaving, then you turn around

Hey!

- Put on a bit of lipstick. You look like a lesbian. - Oh, shut up.

Why the fuck did you have to invite him over?

It's New Year's Eve, and he's all on his own.

Boo-hoo.

- Happy New Year, princess. - Don't slobber all over me.

Snowballs all round.

Looking good, Lindy. You gave us all a scare there.

Huh!

So, to the two most beautiful girls in my life.

Ex-girls.

Ex-women.

- Hello. - Hello, Marina.

Max, come on.

Harina?

You're the only person I wasn't too embarrassed to ask.

♪ I moved like Harlow in Monte Carlo

♪ And showed 'em what I've got

♪ I've been undressed by kings

♪ And I've seen some things

♪ That a woman ain't supposed to see

That's my girl!

Maxie!

Gorgeous Maxie! Come and dance with Linda.

Judith! Come along, baby!

Nat! Oh, what a surprise!

Hi, man!

What's he doing here?

And I know who you are! Happy Nouvelle Ann e, Isabel!

- What do you think? - Mm.

What a pretty robe! It's like mine!

Happy New Year.

Oh, hi. Thanks.

You too.

S-So...

Erm...I'm glad to see you seem to have sorted it all out.

Yeah, well... Did you sort it all out with what-was-his-name?

Oh, Daniel. Yeah. That's great. It's fine.

Good. That's great.

I...erm...I'm sorry about the way that I...

It's just that I was so...

- Yeah, it's probably for the best. - Of course. Absolutely.

- Linda seems really good. - She gave us all a real shock.

Isabel was great.

She's so sure. She really knows what she wants.

- That's good. - Isabel, this is Holly.

- Hello. - Hi. Nice to meet you.

You too.

So, erm...are you here in London for long?

Marina told me that you're an actress.

No, no. I have an audition in Paris on Monday.

I shouldn't say this, but with a very brilliant, very known Italian director.

Bertolucci, actually.

- That's great. - Yeah.

Acting for cinema is not like theatre. In the cinema, you must feel it.

Not show emotion, just feel it. And the camera sees it. It's really wonderful.

- Which films have you done? - Oh, mostly theatre at the moment.

Is it nearly midnight?

Holly... - Yeah? Oh.

Listen, everyone.

Isabel and I have got something to say. We're getting married.

Ohhh!

Lucky devil! Felicitations, Isabel!

Holly, are you all right?

What's wrong, darling? Are you all right?

I think a great deal of champagne is called for here.

Here. It's bloody freezing. Put this on.

I'm fine, Marina.

God, she's a nightmare, isn't she?

Married? God. I mean, who gets married?

That's something out of the Dark Ages.

It's embarrassing. It's pathetic.

I know. It's weird. And she's hilarious!

Oh, God, how can he? It's such a fucking cliché.

- You've still got me. - Why? Who haven't I got?

Holly, don't be like that. I can't bear it when we're not us.

I don't know who I am when we're not us.

I don't know ever.

Come on. Please. For me.

It's nearly time! - Oh, it's that time.

Happy New Year, Holl.

You too.

Come on. Let's go in.

Come on. Smile.

Come on.

..Three, two, one!

Happy New Year!

♪ COWBOY JUNKIES: I Don't Get It

♪ Breaking away to the other side

♪ I wanna make sense of why we live and die

♪ I don't get it

♪ I don't get it

♪ I ask my friends if they understand

Give me that.

- Right. - No, not yet.

How are we for vino?

- Do you prefer rouge, Isabel? - Non, a va, merci.

So, how are the pop videos, Marina?

Great. You know... superficial and meaningless.

And how did you two meet? It's all been very mysterious.

At a Bar Mitzvah.

- It was fate. - Yes, it was fate.

Holly Rossman, right?

Your father's sister's married to my cousin's brother.

Leo. Leo Muller. 11th Commandment:

"Thou shalt dance at Bar Mitzvahs, and not sit in a corner looking superior."

What are you doing for lunch tomorrow?

I've met this man, much too eligible for me. He's a Jewish doctor.

He's called Leo. Dr Leo Muller. Hm?

Where are you meeting him?

OK. Mm.

If she hadn't been walking past the restaurant...

I can't bear to think about it.

No.

- How about you two? I met Carl first didn't I?

It was at work, at some boring meeting.

Wasn't it?

And then I introduced them. It was like a Jane Austen novel.

Which one?

Emma.

So, you're a fight fan, then, Carl?

Yeah, and I spar a bit. It's good to work off aggression.

- A bit like therapy? - Well, I'm in therapy, as well. Twice a week.

- Jungian. - I wonder if I need therapy.

About ten years Leo?

Well, it suits some people, but it's not for everyone.

What do you do? He writes songs.

- Cool. What have you done? - I'm selling stationery.

- Top of the range. We've been living in the States.

It was better for my job. I'm an actress.

Cool. I love LA.

Well, Minneapolis, actually.

I was only in a soap, but, you know, quite interesting.

Yeah, well, I bet you were great with the accent.

- It's sexy. - Oh, thank you.

- How's it going over here? - Well, I met Mike Leigh.

- Oh, I've heard of him. - Yes, he's totally a genius.

And I'm in a new piece soon. It's very political.

We can come to the premi re - Yes!

- Yeah. - And you, Holly?

- Oh...still writing this bloody book...thing. - It's been two years now. Can you believe it?

Still the vampire thing? - Yes, still the vampire thing.

It's how...you know, each decade...

- It reinvents the vampire as a sexual icon. - It's not a book thing, Holl. It's a book.

- Mum sent us your articles. They were great. Marvellous.

- Holly's the intellectual. Isn't she, Marinie? - She's a journalist.

I do all right. I'm always broke, though.

- Ah. - Oh, hi.

I was er...looking for a light. It's weird being back here.

I know.

She's kept my room the same.

Has she?

Still smoking?

Er...no, I've just given up.

This career chitchat makes me feel a failure.

Tell me about it. It used to be hip to be on the dole.

- I know! - What's happened?

I'm still waiting to transmute

into a successful adult, instead of being a 12-year-old.

I remember that 12-year-old.

Can I read your book, Holl?

Really?

No, no. You'd...

- Actually, would you? - Yes.

Who's this boxing prick?

He seems like one of Marina's blokes.

It's nice to see you again.

Yeah. Erm...it's nice to see you.

There you are Come on. I want you downstairs.

I want, I want, I want, I want, I want!

Did you miss your little sis?

Listen, everybody.

Listen. All my favourite people in the entire world...

Listen.

Leo and I have decided

we're going to get married.

Marina!

And there's something else. I've decided that I'm going to be Jewish.

Does that mean I will be?

Well, we'll work on that!

- Mazel tov! Congratulations!

You tell me every fucking boring little detail about your life, ten times a day, but not this one.

You only phoned me four times today!

I knew you'd be funny about it, and you are.

- I'm not - Yes, you are.

- With the converting and everything. - No, it's not that.

Sorry. I'm just surprised.

I know.

Come here.

Nothing's going to change. I promise you.

Hm?

Holly, it's me. Pick up. Look, I know you're there. You're always there.

Holly, Holly, Holly, Holly, Holly!

Come on. Answer the phone. It's me.

- How often do you talk? You're like mothers. - Do you think my calves are fat?

Do you like my calves?

I love everything about you. Not just when you're being a sex kitten.

- Do you know how safe I feel with you? - I love you so much.

Oh, my soul girl!

- What? - Nothing.

Holly?

Hi, Holly. It's me - Nat.

Listen. I was in Peckham, so I thought...Holly, but you're erm...

Hi. No...no, I was working.

Erm...yeah, come round.

Great. Yeah, it's on the fifth floor, but the lift's not working, I'm afraid.

Bye.

- Blimey! You must be fit. - I just never go out!

Your mum must love it round here!

Well, that must be why I live here, then.

Sorry. Sorry. Erm...

Nothing or nothing?

Have you got a...?

Oh, that's OK.

So, listen. If you're working...

I can just grab the manuscript and go.

Oh, no...erm...I was stuck.

- Look. I was just going to have some beans. - Great

I really miss beans. Minneapolis beans were disgusting.

I'd love to go to the States and start again.

Well, start.

- There's something I might apply for, actually. - Yeah? Great.

Just don't tell you know who.

Holly, what did Carl say about that bitch?

Hi. No, I'm working. I'll call you later.

No. No, I haven't got anyone here. Who would I have?

Look, Marina. I don't want a fight. Would you just stop nagging?

Go and learn some Hebrew. Bye.

Jesus! You two, you're like fucking Siamese twins.

We're not.

How many times a day do you speak?

She's so controlling.

She wants you to get involved with that hopeless twat,

so that you'll always need her.

And you let her.

Blimey! You could charge by the hour. You know it all, suddenly.

- She does it to me, too. - How does she do that?

Well...I think you know one way, Holly.

He's not a hopeless twat, actually.

And he's not as superficial as he seems.

He just likes the surfaces of things...

and style can be stimulating, you know.

And he does a lot of work on himself.

And he's funny. And my work is going well. And I'm really happy, for once.

Good. Great.

So, how's Isabel?

Holly.

Holly.

♪ TIM BUCKLEY: Strange Feeling

- Look, Holl... - No. No. No.

I used to watch you...

..in your room.

I know.

I talk to you all the time in my head.

Oh, God, I hate you.

♪ It happens every time

♪ I give you more than what I have

NAT : Hold me.

♪ But now all I need is a little time

♪ Oh, to sing this song, and I think we're gonna find

♪ A way to lose...

Holly, it's me again.

Look, we've got to go to Isabel's play on Wednesday. Cow.

But it's for Nat's sake. OK, well, don't answer, then.

I'd better go. It's getting late.

No, but... Nat. Nat.

- What are you doing here? - Oh, I really wanted to see you, and say sorry.

Oh! What's he doing here?

Selling paperclips?

What are you doing here, mate?

Don't you fucking "mate" me, mate.

- Nat, you should go. - Yes, Nat.

You should go.

Yeah. See you.

Really nice seeing you again, mate.

Darling, I'm sorry.

Still, you didn't really like that script, anyway.

- And you've got the play. - It's crap. You know it is.

You're embarrassed for your friends to see it. And Natalie Liron is in Vogue.

It says, "She is a luminous, enigmatic, French beauty."

Merde!

Shh.

The water's freezing. How long have you been lying there?

You're a prune. Come on.

There we go.

Nat said Isabel's play is bloody awful.

- When did you see Nat? - Oh, no, I didn't. We just spoke.

- So, how's the Hebrew coming? - Are you really pleased for us?

Yes. Oh, God. How many times, already?

How much more pleased can I be? I'm in a state of bliss.

- All right. - You don't need my approval.

Of course I do. I want us all to be happy.

I know.

What about that one? That goes.

- Honestly, this whole Jewish thing... - Why shouldn't I be Jewish?

Huh? It gives me a sense of identity.

Really? Whose identity?

What did you say?

Nothing. What?

What did you just say just then?

Oh, Jesus. Come on. I fucking introduced you, didn't I?

Don't be so touchy. It's Christian of you.

What the fuck did you mean, Holly?

Nothing, all right? I'm sorry. God.

Drop it. We're having a nice time. You don't have to make it into a big deal.

We were having a nice time, until you spoilt it.

Why do you hate people being happy?

- I don't. - You're just like your mother.

- What do you mean? - Just because things haven't worked out for you.

Leave Nat alone when he's contented.

Nat? What has Nat got to do with it?

He's happy, and so am I.

I'm sorry you can't be pleased for us.

I just...I don't...I don't understand what...

I don't know what I'm supposed to have... Fuck it.

Isabel?

Hi, darling. It's Marina.

I'm fine. How are you?

Oh, good.

Well, I was just calling to say good luck, really. Mm-hm.

And I saw Holly, and she said she'd seen Nat,

so she'll be there, too, which is nice.

Mm. OK.

All right. Well, see you then. Lots of love. Bye.

Was it symbolism about the Berlin Wall and the Falklands?

Well, it's not meant to be Cats.

- How are you? - OK, thanks.

Yeah.

Two and a half bloody hours!

So nice you came, Holly.

- You really liked it? - Mm. Mm-hm.

- Really? - Mm.

Nat

Did you tell them our news?

You know what? We're going to try for a baby.

Oh! Oh, fabulous!

Congratulations.

I don't want it calling me Grandma!

Aunt Marina!

I'm dehydrated.

No you're thirsty. Why can't you be thirsty, like normal people?

I'm dehydrated.

How are Marina's wedding plans going? Leo Muller! Whoever would have thought?

Great, isn't it? I can't wait.

Oh, Rachel Bloom's moving to St John's Wood, and the sister got engaged,

to an architect.

Actually, I've got something to tell you.

- I'm probably moving. - Oh, darling! Thank God!

To New York.

I've practically got this really good job, and I know some people I can stay with.

And erm...I just need a change.

Oh, you just need a change?

"I'm not happy, so I'll just move."

All the chances you've had...

and you...you...fucking...

you just fucking mess it all up, don't you?

When, darling?

- After New Year. - Hm.

So, what's your news?

Morton Jacobs has got bowel cancer.

Holly, I really need to speak to you.

Look, I'm sorry, OK?

Holly, please.

When exactly were you going to tell me, Holly? A call from the airport?

I was going to. I just...

Not yet. Who did?

Carl, actually.

- We're the only two people who care about you! - Shh, shh.

I mean, New York? You wouldn't last five minutes.

It's the most competitive place in the world.

- Let's talk about this in the morning. - No, we can talk about it now.

All we do these days is argue or sulk. We don't even have a good time any more.

- Yes, we do. - When?

I'm pregnant.

Oh, God.

Hey, hey, it's all right.

- No, it's not. - It's all right. Shh.

It's meant to be a good thing, isn't it?

With Leo. Leo, who makes you feel so real!

Look, you won't go now, will you?

Stop it. Stop it.

- I'll have to get rid of it if you go. - Stop it.

Hi, Marina.

Hi, Carl.

- Did I wake you up? - Yeah.

Sorry, darling.

All right, gorgeous? I'm OK.

- You're both still coming to Leo's for New Year? - Mm.

We'll all be together. It'll be brilliant.

Let's celebrate Marina's perfect, pregnant life.

You want to go.

I don't. And, anyway, why shouldn't I want to?

And Holly's goodbye. So sad, huh?

That's why you want to go.

Jesus, Isabel! Could you move yourself?

♪ SONNY & CHER: I Got You Babe

♪ They say we're young and we don't know

♪ We won't find out

♪ Until we grow

♪ Well, I don't know if all that's true

♪ Cos you got me, and, baby, I got you

♪ Babe

♪ I got you, babe

♪ I got you, babe

♪ They say our love won't pay the rent

♪ Before it's earned

♪ Our money's always spent

Un-fucking-believable! Why did that cunt suddenly turn up?

Cos Linda invited him.

Come inside. I'm freezing.

Anyway, they have to do it every five years. It's like gorillas, or something.

Just don't choose me, darling.

It's like group therapy.

OK, I've got someone. Ooh, it speaks!

OK. What element are they like?

Seawater. The dark sea.

Mysterious. Must be me!

What poet?

Elizabeth Barrett Browning.

What time of day? Dusk.

Which painter?

Whistler.

Never heard of him!

- It's Isabel. No, it's not.

It's Holly.

The truth game, right?

Sit down.

Nat, old boy. Naughty, naughty! Shut up, Ray.

This is boring.

Let's play erm...

sardines.

You'll play, won't you, Carl?

Squishy-squashy!

Do you know how many men I've slept with?

No.

63.

- 63? - Uh-huh.

And now it's going to stay 63 for ever.

- Is that right? - Yeah.

- Argh! - Shh.

I talk to you in my head, too, all the time.

It's horrible out there.

Why can't we stay in here for ever?

What's stopping us?

You tell me.

Look, no, no.

- Why? - This is too fucked-up.

I don't understand this stupid English game!

Jesus you're fucked-up!

Come on. Don't touch me.

- Sweetheart? - You're old!

I'm sick.

Marina!

Come on. Come on. It's all right.

Shh. It's all right. Come on.

How can I be a mother when I'm such a terrible, sick person?

That's one of the qualifications, isn't it?

- I'm so disgusting! I'm sorry. - It's all right.

He's suffocating me. I can't bear him to touch me.

I feel so empty.

Come on. Look at you. You've got everything going for you. A career.

Lovely, real Leo. Marriage, religion, baby. Come on.

No, I'm a big, fat nothing.

I don't have integrity, or soul, or beliefs.

I haven't even read War And fucking Peace.

And you're going to go away to New York, and I'm going to be left here with a kid and him.

And then there's no point to anything, I might...

I might as well just die now!

Stop it. Stop it.

No. Please, please, don't go. Please, please...

- Stop it. Stop it! - Please, don't go.

- Stop it. - Please, don't go.

We both have got to stop this.

- Stop what? What do you mean? - I don't know. I just...

I don't want to be us any more.

You know?

I mean, it's not your fault...

I've let you do it, and I blame you, but...

..I don't like what I am with you.

You're strangling me.

We're, like, suffocating each other.

All the time that I'm with you, I feel ugly,

and 14...

and bloody desperate and depressed...

and not good enough...

and unsuccessful and jealous...

and stuck.

- I can change. - No.

- Holly, I'll change. - No, no. Get off.

Just get off me!

- I'll kill myself if you go! - No, you won't. No, you won't.

I will.

There's no me without you!

- Shh. Yes, there is. - No!

We're getting a divorce. I'm sorry. I am sorry.

- No, please, Holly! - Here's Leo. You'll be fine.

Holly!

Come here, baby. Shh.

Shh. Shh.

Holly, wait.

Where are you going?

I don't know.

Can I come?

- Take that! Becky, keep the noise down, please.

Take that!

Rifka, will you stop torturing your bloody brother? Mummy's got a headache.

Thanks, love.

♪ LUCY STREET : White Horses

♪ On white horses let me ride away

♪ To my world of dreams so far away

♪ Let me run

♪ To the sun

♪ To a world my heart can understand

♪ It's a gentle, warm and wonderland

♪ Far away

♪ Stars away

♪ Where the clouds are made of candyfloss

♪ As the day is born

♪ When the stars are gone

♪ We'll race to meet the dawn

♪ So, when I can only see the grey

♪ Of a sad and very lonely day

♪ That's when I

♪ Softly sigh

♪ On white horses, snowy-white horses, let me ride away

♪ SUPER FURRY ANIMALS: Drawing Rings Around The World

♪ You expose the film in me

♪ We're drawing rings around the world

♪ Sooner or later we will melt together

♪ And draw rings around the world

♪ With all those meteoric stones

♪ And all those sheep they never cloned

♪ OK

♪ I am glowing radioactive

♪ We draw rings around the world

♪ Wish you could see us when we're at our best

♪ Now we draw rings around the world

♪ With cans of Post Water in tow

♪ We're gonna vaporise your soul

♪ Earth will become Saturn II

♪ With all those rings around the world

♪ Tetsuo II became me and you

♪ With all those rings around the world

♪ And all those Body Hammer blows

♪ Drawing rings around the world

♪ Ah-ha

♪ Ring-ring, ring-ring

♪ Rings around the world

♪ Ring-ring, ring-ring...